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wlwxreader · 14 days ago

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Queen of the Wilderness

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Yandere!Lottie Matthews x fem!reader

Summary: After the crash, came the need for survival. And with that, came the hunger. When you get selected as The Queen of Hearts, your girlfriend Lottie does everything she can to keep you safe, and starts to think of you of some kind of almighty being

Warning(s): obsessive behavior, possessive behavior, cannibalism, mentions of blood, Lottie being a cult leader, power dynamics, protective!Lottie

Word Count: 2.6 k words

Request: here

A/N: might make a part 2 idk

Masterlist: tba

You had lost count of how many months you have been stuck in the forest with your teammates.

You used to keep a very precise count. Every time you woke up, you would add another number to the figure. You would repeat it throughout the day, like a mantra that kept you sane.

You stopped counting when Jackie died, and Lottie started to talk about the Wilderness.

It made no sense to keep count anymore. No one would ever come to rescue you. You didn’t want them to, after what you had done. You all had broken a sacred human oath; you had eaten human flesh. Your soul would be forever tainted. It was only fair that you had to live the rest of your days like that, always hungry, always weighed down by your mistakes.

Lottie had changed too, but in a way you didn’t expect to. She was the leader of the group now, always keeping everyone on check.

She also kept them fed.

You never questioned her. You knew her. You knew she was doing whatever she could to keep the group together, and alive. You had known her your entire life, you knew she wouldn’t hurt a fly.

You knew it.

So when they started doing the card game, and she was a willing participant, you knew it was for the best.

“We have to do it, Y/N,” she whispered quietly, rubbing your back as you dry heaved over a bucket. You were in the attic, it was late at night. You could see her silhouette only because of the moon light, shining through the naked trees.

“I know,” you whispered. You moved away from the bucket. No matter how much you hated yourself, your weakened body couldn’t bring itself to throw up.

You had just eaten a person, and you were so hungry you would have gone for another round.

“Come here,” she whispered. Her hands were cold, but when you rested your head on her chest, she was warm. So damn warm against the coldness.

“I hate it,” you said. You wanted to sob, but were too tired to do so.

“I know, baby.”

Her voice was soft, unlike when she talked to the group. With you, she was still warm, she was still Lottie.

“What do you think we would be doing now, if the plane never crashed?” you asked. You used to ask a lot of questions lately; you needed to hear her voice, so it would drown out everything else.

“We’d be in college,” Lottie said. She ran her hand through your hair, and you sighed. “We would be in the same university. I would’ve gotten us a place close to college, and we would be living together.”

“You think?” you asked, sleepily.

“Yeah,” Lottie said, with a certainty that made you feel relaxed. “We’ll always be together, baby. Always.”

You hummed, closing your eyes. You fell into a dreamless sleep, and Lottie allowed you, sitting down on the floor. When she was certain you wouldn’t wake up, she carried you to bed and put all the blankets she could find over your body.

She left the attic with a kiss on your forehead. Almost everyone was already sleeping, laying as close to the fire as they could be. Natalie was laying against one of the walls, deep in thought.

“Have we run out of meat already?” Lottie asked. She crossed her arms, waiting for the blonde to reply.

“We have food for tomorrow’s lunch,” she said. Her eyes were on the rifle, as if she was considering how crazy it would be to get out in the middle of the night to find an animal.

“That’s it?” Lottie looked out the window, as she too was wondering the same thing.

“Yeah,” Natalie sighed. She looked reluctant to even speak the words. “Tomorrow, we’ll have to play again.”

Play. Lottie almost laughed at the word. They haven’t played in too long. Not even since the plane crashed.

“Okay,” she said instead. “I’ll work on it.”

Lottie came back to the attic, and laid down beside you. She put her hand on your cheek, and smiled when you moved closer, seeking her out even in your sleep.

Lottie knew what they were doing, what she was doing, would be considered psychotic if anyone outside of the group were to find out. But they couldn’t hear the whispers that came with the wind, they couldn’t feel the hunger that stuck like cheap gum on long hair. They couldn’t, but she could, and she knew she had to listen to the wilderness to keep you alive.

You were the most important person in her life. You were her lifeline. When she first saw you, her breath had stopped for a second. She had wanted you ever since, and had done everything to ensure you stayed by her side. She had the means for it. Especially now, in the middle of nowhere, with a group of people that would do anything she asked for.

“I’ll keep you safe,” she whispered against your hair. “I promise.”

The Queen of Hearts.

The card stared back at you, almost mockingly.

You swallowed hard, looking around the room. You wanted to take it all in, the tranquility of the cabin before you turned the card around and everyone would be craving your meat like wild animals.

Your eyes caught Lottie’s. She looked beautiful, with her antler crown and her dark brown hair falling on soft waves. She looked back, always aware whenever you looked at her, and the smile she gave you froze midway when she noticed your face.

“No,” she said, arms falling down to her sides. All strength seemed to leave her all at once. While the others kept choosing a different card from the stack, she walked up to you in fast steps.

“Run.”

You looked into her wild eyes, feeling her fingers digging into your arms. You blinked once, twice, and then once more, and before you knew it, the card was on the ground and you were running towards the door.

“It’s Y/N,” Shauna said. She looked detached, gone. Her eyes no longer had any warmth in them.

“Fuck,” Natalie said, looking at Lottie. She rushed to grab the rifle and held tight onto it, making sure no one else would grab it and use it to hunt you.

“She can’t get away,” someone said, and it was as if a light switch was turned on.

Everyone except Lottie and Natalie left the cabin, searching for you. They screamed your name, running in different directions to find you.

“This can’t be right,” Lottie said, completely out of it. She stared at the door, eyes out of focus. “Y/N is mine. They wouldn’t hurt her. The wilderness promised. I promised.”

“I—” Natalie was lost for words. She had never been okay with anything they were doing. She felt guilty; if she had managed to find enough food to keep everyone well fed… “I’m so sorry, Lot.”

Hours went by, and you remained hidden.

You moved stealthily, remembering all the advice Nat had taught you in those times you hunted with her.

Keep your head down. Use the woods to your advantage. Never look back, always move forward.

You did as she had told you all those weeks ago. You could hear them all around you, steps that never flattered unlike yours, screams that called for your blood, for your death.

You kept going, until you fell down. You almost moaned, but held yourself back in time. If they heard you now, it would be over.

You looked at your foot, grabbing it. It hurt like a bitch.

Something moved to your left, and you ignored the pain to get up. You couldn’t fight anyone sitting on the floor.

Instead, you found yourself staring at a white hare. You blinked in disbelief. It couldn’t be possible. Nat and Travis had said time and time again there were no animals left to hunt.

So why was a hare right in front of you?

You watched as it dug into the snow, disappearing from sight. You crawled towards the place the animal had just been at, and you noticed a small hole. With desperation, using the last remaining rays of sunlight, you moved the snow away, trying to find what you thought could be your salvation.

The hare’s den.

Your hands were numb and freezing by the time you found it. There were at least ten of them, piled up together in their home to keep safe from the cold. You felt sorry for a second before you reached for the first one, wasting no time to twist its neck.

“I’m so sorry,” you whispered as you sobbed. You took off your jacket, and laid the animal there. You did the same with the others, only thinking of how long they would keep the group fed.

They wouldn’t go rotten for a while if you kept them by the snow, and someone could make broth with them. If the group was smart, the animals laying on your jacket would keep you fed for well over a month.

You got up when you were done, trying not to think of what you had just done with those innocent hares. Your steps were clumsy and uneven, what with the snow and your throbbing ankle. You took a big sigh, and walked back to the cabin, hoping you could explain yourself before you were attacked by someone, anyone.

When you saw lights by the cabin, you almost went back into the woods. They had regrouped, probably arranging themselves into different groups to cover the entire forest until they found you.

Taissa was the first one to notice you, limping toward the cabin. In a moment of loyalty you had thought long forgotten, she shut her mouth and turned back around, giving you some ahead time to run.

But you didn’t. You moved forward, stepping loudly so everyone could hear.

“Y/N,” Lottie said, out of breath. She ran towards you, wrapping her arms tightly around you, knees deep in the snow you had just fallen to, incapable of holding yourself up anymore.

You knew then, with the way she was holding you, that she would die protecting you. She wouldn’t move away from you even if they crawled at her skin until they reached muscle and bone.

“Lottie,” Shauna said, almost weary. “Move away from Y/N.”

“You won’t take her away from me,” Lottie said. You had never heard her sound so fierce.

“We need food,” Misty said.

“I have food,” you said. Your voice was muffled by Lottie’s chest.

“What?”

You moved away from your girlfriend, and rested the jacket on the ground. Silence was the only response you recieved.

Everyone looked at the hares, in complete confusion.

“It’s not possible,” Natalie said. She kneeled down in front of you and grabbed one of the hares, as if to check if they were real.

“It is,” Lottie said, with a conviction that made you furrow your eyebrows. “Y/N has brought us food. She’s the Wilderness’ daughter.”

“What?” Shauna asked, looking between you and the hares.

“Can’t you see?” Lottie asked, getting up. She faced the entire group with a smile on her face. “She is mine, and she is protected by the Wilderness. The Wilderness is her mother.”

You wanted to shake your head, to tell Lottie to shut up, but you were still in shock. In a few days, you would process everything that had happened and finally understand the severity of the situation, of just how close you had been to being hunted by your own friends, but at the moment you couldn’t think of anything except how scared you were, so you just allowed Lottie to wrap her arms around your forearms, trying to help you get up.

“My foot,” you complained.

“Someone hurt you?” she asked, sweetly. Too cheerful given the situation.

“No.”

But Lottie didn’t hear you. She got up again, looking at the crowd with fire in her eyes.

“Do you see what you have done?” she asked. “You hurt her. You know what would’ve happened if someone had taken her from me?”

The group remained silent, looking at Lottie as if they were mesmerized. A few of the girls had kneeled down to grab one of the hares, them checking too if they were real, and had stayed there, kneeling in front of your girlfriend.

“Everyone would have been killed by the Wilderness. She has been benevolent this time, allowing you to hurt what’s mine and still keeping you fed. But it won’t happen again.”

You looked in disbelief as everyone nodded.

“Now go work on dinner, and be thankful for the food she has brought.”

To your utter surprise, Lottie grabbed you bride style and lifted you up. She made you rest your head on her shoulder, and carried you back to the cabin.

“I’m sorry, darling,” she whispered as she sat you down in one of the chairs that were by the fire. She kneeled before you, and took off your shoes. “I should’ve kept you safe. You shouldn’t have gotten hurt.”

You watched as she got up to get the little medical supplies there were left. She kneeled and grabbed your swollen foot, and left a kiss on your shin.

“I’ll do better next time,” she promised. She wrapped some bandage over the afflicted zone, apologizing when you complained. “I will. No more card games for you. No one is ever going to touch you again. No one but me.”

“Lottie…”

She gave you a smile after she was done with the bandage. It was slightly crooked, and a little tight, and she knew she should have asked Misty to do it, but she would rather die than see another woman touching you.

You were hers. She could finally understand— it had all happened for a reason. The two of you meeting, you joining the football team, the plane crash… It was all for a reason.

“Don’t you see, baby?” she asked, eyes wide open. A smile split her face in half, making you slightly uneasy. “You are mine. My queen. The child of the Wilderness. We both look out for you.”

On any other day, you would have been combative. You would have told her she was overreacting, and that she should calm down. That the entire thing was maddening, and it was no one’s fault.

But you were so tired, and your leg hurt, and you wanted to cry over the betrayal you had felt when your friends had tried to kill you to eat you.

So instead, you nodded, and followed her back to the attic.

“My baby,” Lottie wrapped a jacket around your shoulders. “You must’ve been so cold. But not anymore.”

She kissed your shoulder when you laid behind her on the bed, and you allowed her to hold you through the night.

Lottie smiled when she felt your breath slow down, indicating you had fallen asleep.

She could hear noises downstairs. The girls were already preparing dinner. She would go down in a while to grab food for the two of you, but until then, she held you tight.

#yellowjackets #yellowjackets fanfic #lottie matthews #lottie mathews x reader #yandere #yandere!lottie matthews #lottie matthews x you #jackie taylor #natalie scatorccio #shauna shipman #yellowjackets x reader #x reader #lesbian #wlw #Courtney Eaton #yj cast #courtney eaton x reader

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nataliescatorccioapologist · 3 months ago

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A Lottie Matthews Deep Dive/Character Analysis

Let’s talk about an enigmatic, other-worldly, lonely weird girl who may or may not be the leader of a cult.

General Information

Charlotte (Lottie) Matthews is played by Courtney Eaton and Simone Kessel on Yellowjackets. Lottie is 17 years-old at the start of the series in the teen timeline and approximately 43 years-old in the adult timeline. She grew up in the (fictional) town of Wiskayok, New Jersey.

She is described in the script as a “tightly wound, statuesque, lonely rich girl.” Lottie is gentle and soft-spoken until she finds her voice through her spirituality and leadership. She is deeply empathetic with a natural gift for guiding and helping others, but there is a darkness under the surface that she has been struggling to keep from taking over for her entire life.

Childhood and Relationship with Parents

Lottie is the only child of Malcolm and Emilia Matthews. Due to her father’s success in business, Lottie grew up in a very wealthy home (wealthy enough to have maids and to be able to afford a private plane). However this wealth came at a cost, as Lottie’s father’s busy work schedule resulted in him rarely being around. Lottie stated that her father buying the team a private plane was “basically his only form of parenting.” When Malcolm was around, it seems like he was cold, distant, and critical of Lottie.

We see that, as a child, Lottie often had strange “visions,” including a time in which she prevented her and her family from getting into a potentially fatal car crash.

The aftermath of this incident allows us to see how Lottie’s unusual behavior was handled by each of her parents when she was growing up. While Emilia seemed to believe that Lottie was had a “gift” and was connected to something greater, Malcolm was adamant that Lottie was “sick” and needed psychiatric help. Due to Malcolm’s influence and control in the family, it is clear that his mentality is the one that prevailed, and Lottie grew up believing that there was something wrong with her.

From what we have seen of Malcolm so far, it is clear that he was very controlling of Lottie and hyper focused on maintaining the family’s image. He is happy to take the reigns and make major life decisions for Lottie (including checking her into a psychiatric facility and agreeing to have her go through electroshock therapy) in order to maintain this spotless, prim and proper family picture. His insistence that Lottie needs to be “fixed” after she’s rescued says a lot about how he views Lottie and her trauma.

I believe Malcolm’s criticism and control of Lottie is to blame for her quiet, “tightly wound” and “statuesque” demeanor described in the script. She has learned to make herself presentable and acceptable, which means not using her voice and being rigid as she attempts to push down her natural thoughts and behaviors. I think it says a lot that Lottie regularly steals from TJ Maxx even though she definitely has the funds to afford pretty much anything she wants. It’s her subtle way of rebelling against her father’s control. Lottie has a strict set of standards she must live by, and stealing is her way of feeling free and unrestricted.

Mental Illness and Struggle to Appear ‘Normal’

Likely due to Malcolm’s insistence that something is wrong with Lottie, we see her taking Loxapine (an antipsychotic often prescribed to people diagnosed with schizophrenia) in the Pilot episode. Over the years, it does seem like Lottie deeply internalized her father’s beliefs about her mental state. We can see how fearful she appears when she’s counting how many pills she has left after the crash. She’s learned that the pills allow her to appear “acceptable,” and she’s ashamed of who she is without them due to her father’s emphasis that she is “sick.” I think that some part of Lottie is afraid of herself; she knows there is something in her, deep down, that is dangerous.

We can see this bubbling under the surface in the Pilot episode, as Lottie tries her best to appear normal and fit in with her classmates. I feel like her fashion sense in the first few episodes perfectly exemplifies this. In the Pilot episode, we see Lottie in cute little pigtails and, in the party scene, a cropped pink fuzzy sweater with a plaid mini skirt that looks like something Cher would wear in Clueless.

This is a popular style for a teenage girl in the 90s, but something about it feels inauthentic and slightly off when Lottie wears it. It looks more like a performance of what Lottie thinks a girl her age should be wearing rather than an actual representation of who she is. After the plane crash, Lottie initially clings to this look, but as she discovers her connection to spirituality, her clothing gradually evolves. She transitions from cropped brightly colored baby tees and preppy sweaters—notably echoing Jackie’s fashion sense—to long, flowing dresses. As an adult, she embraces bohemian kaftans and shawls. In these more eccentric and ethereal outfits, she appears much more relaxed and natural, contrasting with the rigidity she exhibits when trying to fit in.

We can see this in the way she talks, as well. She’s quiet and soft-spoken, at first, afraid what might happen if she expresses who she truly is, but we can see a hint of something a little more bold underneath (thinking of that amazing Danny Mears cousin comeback Lottie threw at Mari). As Lottie starts to believe in herself and her abilities, she starts to speak up more.

Laura Lee, The Wilderness, and Finding a Voice

Laura Lee is instrumental in Lottie’s development from quiet weird girl into the influential leader we see in the adult timeline. After the plane crash (and as Lottie’s meds run out), Lottie starts to have strange visions/hallucinations (including seeing a deer with shredded antlers, a red river, and smoke). At first, Lottie hides these visions as she likely has been doing her whole life due to her father’s insistence. But, once she confides in Laura Lee and Laura Lee actually believes her, we see Lottie’s view of herself begin to shift. Laura Lee is the first person to stand by her and insist that Lottie has a gift, and that her eccentricities are something to be proud of rather than ashamed of.

The baptism scene marks a major shift in Lottie’s character, as it is the beginning of Lottie’s connection to spirituality and “The Wilderness.” The mental illness rhetoric that her father has been feeding her her whole life is finally shattered, and a new image of herself is developing. This is only strengthened as Lottie’s visions begin to come true (Nat and Travis brining back the deer with the shredded antlers, Tai’s expedition group stumbling across a red river, the smoke from the flare gun Tai uses to scare off the wolves). As more people begin to believe in Lottie, we see her leading prayer circles, giving directions, and even standing up to Natalie when she challenges her. The Wilderness has finally allowed her to be her authentic self, which is why we see her so devastated when they are rescued.

Lottie’s selective mutism after they are rescued is representative of how important the Wilderness was to Lottie finding her voice. Now that The Wilderness is gone and Lottie is back to the real world (and back under her father’s thumb), her voice is gone with it. She went from being worshipped and being a leader to being strapped down, electrocuted, and held against her will in a psych ward.

Thankfully, Lottie finds her voice again as an adult, when she starts her wellness center (cult?).

Influence and Intentions

Lottie’s influence over others is undeniable. In the teen timeline, she managed to get an entire group of people who previously thought she was crazy to follow her every direction and worship her as a spiritual figure (including even the most extreme skeptics, Tai and Nat). In the adult timeline, she manages to get hundreds (possibly thousands) of people to devote their lives to her teachings and guidance. We can see just how magnetic Lottie is in the scene where the survivors reunite for the first time, the look of pure awe on Van’s face says it all:

Lottie has a lot of power, and, as the overused saying goes, with great power comes great responsibility. Lottie’s intentions are usually good. She wants to help and protect others, but her power and influence always ends up spiraling into something darker, resulting in disastrous consequences for her and those around her. She believes the Wilderness is protecting them, so she follows its lead in order to ensure the survival of her teammates. This results in cannibalistic rituals and a descent into complete primacy. She wants to help Shauna release her rage, so she lets her nearly beat her to death. This causes the group to do the card draw to save her life, which results in Javi’s death. She wants to help Travis reconnect with the Wilderness so that he can put an end to the visions that are tormenting him, which results in his death. She wants to save Nat’s life, so she kidnaps her and keeps her against her will at her compound. She wants to have one more hunt to appease the Wilderness and end the suffering she and the rest of the survivors are experiencing, which results in Nat’s death.

Lottie even has good intentions in crowning Nat as the new Antler Queen. Lottie sees how much her power has become warped and misguided after the group kills Javi to save her, so she chooses the most grounded and skeptical person of the group, Nat, as the new leader in an attempt to lead the group away from the dark path they are following. However, she doesn’t realize the burden she is placing on Nat, crowning her the leader right as the group has descended into something more evil and primal. She has taken the weight of the groups sins and placed it onto Nat, whose sanity is already clearly beginning to deteriorate. I imagine that Lottie’s well-intentioned decision to crown Nat as the new leader will spiral just as the rest of her intentions do, and more people will die and/or suffer as a result.

The Dark Side of Lottie

While Lottie is generally a gentle person, we’ve seen hints of a much darker version of herself come to the surface. The first time we really see this shift is Doomcoming, when Lottie locks Jackie in the pantry and hunts Travis down with the intention to kill him. Lottie’s laughter when Nat pushes her to the ground is definitely chilling and shows us that there is an unhinged side of Lottie that is capable of hurting people.

We see this again when Lottie insists on reinstating the hunt in the adult timeline, as she becomes insistent that she or one of the other survivors must die to appease the Wilderness. It’s definitely unsettling to see the crazed look in her eyes as she’s shuffling the cards for the hunt and after Callie shoots her in the adult timeline.

The circumstances around Travis’ death are still suspicious, as well. Was Lottie telling Nat the truth? Or did the dark side of her take over and intentionally sacrifice Travis to the Wilderness? And why did she drain his bank account after his death? And there are certainly some ethical concerns surrounding Lottie’s wellness center. Is Lottie preying on the trauma and vulnerability of her patients at the wellness center? Cutting them off from the outside world and their families and having them devote their lives to her is kind of creepy manipulative cult-leader behavior. And is there some part of Lottie that enjoys the power she holds over her patients at the compound? Was there some part of her that enjoyed having power over the group in the wilderness?

Lottie has been trying to push down and hide this unhinged side of herself for her whole life. While adult Lottie is more sure of herself and confident than we have ever known her before, she is still struggling with the same battle she was before the plane crash. Lottie is still confining a part of herself that she feels is dangerous. She still worries about her impact on others and her ability to hurt people. We see that Lottie has been in therapy for years. She’s back on the meds, and she’s pushing down the side of herself that believes in the Wilderness. She insists that the visions and feelings she is having are not real. We can see how afraid she is of that primal side of herself reemerging during the hypnosis scene with Nat.

The fear on her face when she realizes she's stepping back into that Antler Queen role is palpable. She doesn't want to step back into that role, but feels like it is out of her control. When the other survivors arrive at her compound, she initially wants them to leave, fearing her own reaction if she is around them for too long. However, her fear isn't enough to stop her from returning to her old ways, and, unfortunately, her allegiance to the Wilderness has fatal consequences in the Season 2 finale.

Season 3

In the aftermath of Nat's death in the adult timeline and Lottie usurping her leadership to Nat in the teen timeline, I think Season 3 will see some major shifts in Lottie. In the wilderness, she will have to grapple with no longer being the leader of the group, and the potential loss of purpose and direction that goes along with that. How will she feel watching Nat lead the group that used to worship her? Will she agree with Nat's decisions? Will the group still have allegiance to her over Nat? What is Lottie's relationship with the Wilderness like now that, according to her, she can't "hear it" anymore? Is Lottie the one under the Antler Queen hood after all?

In the adult timeline, Lottie will have to come to terms with the fact that she is partially responsible for Nat's death and the guilt and regret that may come along with that. There is also a high likelihood that she will be sent to a psychiatric hospital after the events of Season 2, so we may see her trying to once again reconcile the part of herself that wants to accept that she is mentally ill and the part of herself that truly believes in the Wilderness entity. We have also seen a casting for "Mr. Matthews" in Season 3, which likely means we will see the return of Lottie's father. Seeing her dynamic with her father as an adult will be very interesting. Will she fall back under his control? Or will she speak up and fight back against him this time? What will Lottie's relationships with the other Yellowjackets look like now?

Anyways, Lottie is a tragic, tormented character and I absolutely love her and all of her weirdness. I can't wait to see what Season 3 has in store for her.

#yap session part 2 #van is next yall #if you made it through this whole thing i love you but i am also concerned for you #yellowjackets #lottie matthews #lottie yellowjackets #courtney eaton #simone kessell #yellowjackets season 3 #yj #character analysis #laura lee yellowjackets #laura lee

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