#cop a fuckin attitude with me because it was *my* idea to do the thing

[firebird-inkheart]

[gibbingtonwibbington]

Major drama update want to know why I have been MIA?l

I have to scroll back in my posts, but I forget if I told you about the day before Christmas Eve. This piece of gutter-butt white trash who just moved down at the end of the the hall was being super fucking rude and shit. Fuckin banging on her door like she had the secret code for the Pentagon to stop an asteroid or something. Even those package stealing crackheads weren’t this loud. So… that’s fucking LOUD. She literally woke me up out of a fkn dead worked-on-shit-for-three-days-no-sleep nap. I was pissed.Ya know, the whole baby loud fucking repetitive noises thing…. it drives me crazy and I think it’s literally the fucking rudest thing anyone could do. It would be one thing if her fucking apartment was on fire or something, but because she forgot a fucking kids outfit? Ohhhhhh, I don’t think so sweetheart. She made an enemy and if she wants to fight she found the right one. She knew her attitude didn’t scare me one bit. I said “I’M ANNOYING?! II’MM ANNOYING?!!!because she was in the stairwell hiding yet STILL MAD n banging at her bdaddy. Sp I was trying to get her back into the hallway. t’s like, you’re either waking him up for drugs or he just straight pizzed u off n you’re here to bitch him out. That is NO “my kid’s clothes” kind of door pounding. Puuuuh leeeze. She comes back outnsays someything I forgot. So i go yea, you’re the one wh’s been pounding at the door? Still at this time had NO idea if was the same girl lol. Her voice completely changed from yo she’s annoying yoyoto! Talking to nobody. But as I walked a little closer- herr voice started to shake. Bark but no bite that one.

I don’t give a damn-she can do whatever the hell she wants but don’t be fucking insanely loud and ab noxious. It’s not difficult. I’m insane n ive kept tp myself here for six years. Not only did she wake me up but she lives right next to these 1000 year old people and then right next door on the other side is some guy was some horrible lung condition, he can barely breathe. Then the next guy he had such bad cancer age of fucking just move out of here. And the next come some guy who is like a nut bag and then comes me. Where the fuck does she think she’s living at? She’s not renting the hallway. 🤷🏻‍♀️ If she didn’t think she was being a nuisance, she wouldn’t hamoved to the stairwell, if she wasn’t scared she wouldn’t of had to go get Ms. P. Patel to fight against me w her.

Since then my neighbor has been absolutely bat shit crazy. Past three weeks, so maybe a full week before she joined in , before this even happened, she’d been throwing her metal mixing bowl at her kid to scare her into not crying anymore. I’d say the past three months she’s been the worst to her kid ever , screaming louder than she’s been the whole time she’s lived here and she’s lived here for at least three years. I don’t know what the hell’s going on, but her little girl literally screams and cries all day long , I just can’t listen to it anymore . She’s just banshee screaming at this kid from wake up to bedtime. I could puke. Plus, I think she def has some paranoia issues. Anytime I go into the kitchen to do anything to glue gun something to whatever she’ll run in the kitchen and start banging pots and pans and throwing pots and pans like this woman is absolutely insane.

Earlier in the day that I absolutely flipped out “ok gibby, wll be there in a minute” Gibby was piggin for food. ! She says in English for the first time ever “shut up! “Well, okay then. I slowly started bitching and I was making tequila drinks and I just kept going and then I just got louder and louder and eventually I knew they were there because I could hear her own boyfriend laughing at my jokes about the bitch down the hallway. A lot of gremlin references later, I started talking about calling the cops and if I call the cops on them once they will kick your ass out and all your asses a road blah blah blah I was fucking flipping out hard-core. This little girls got some fucking balls though cause the next day she was completely silent until I called Gibby for her food again and she told me to shut up again. So I started whispering really evil things right up against the wall that I will not tell you about. Then the next day she did not make a sound thought she was dead or not home that day. I think bdaddy made her leave.I think came and got her. Almost positive he made her. Oh yeah also he broke up with her again. probably because I was yelling “Do you guys believe in karma! Because I do and no one has ever fucked with me and gotten away with it!” Less than 12 hrs later (shnvr speaks English in her house. Not ONCE, b besides the shutup shen it was food for Gibby time.

She came really close to the wall and called the stupid new girl down the hall on her phone. so I would hear) “he doesn’t want you here and he doesn’t want me either! “And starts crying. Sobbing rest of the night. It’s like well maybe you shouldn’t of stood outside my door and banged on my door at 4:30 in the morning with that idiot down the hallway. So when I was in the bathroom they were pointing &?saying, “she’s right there no, she’s right there!” so I threw a bunch of blankets on the squeaky area of the floor so they wouldn’t know I was at the peephole. So I was at the peepz and I kept throwing heavy shit (my heavy, vinyl customizable 3in blank dunny figures and figurines that were lined up on my mirror)in the bathroom so Their drunk, petty, 4 ft, gremlin faced, no sense having SCARED trashbags would think I was still in the bathroom. I heard n saw her mouth go “I’m gonna kill her” lmao. But what a dumb ass didn’t know this should’ve been going on for like weeks already. GEE if someone shot me I WONDER WHO it could beee?! Dumb fucks. ( oh my gosh i just heard her toss somethingk metal at the kid again right now bf and a other f fr) what the fuck! By the way her baby daddy moved back in here not because he wanted to be with her and you know why I know that? Because he quit his day job so he can watch her psycho ass in the day to make sure she didn’t actually hurt her child their child and he took a night job at Fuckin Dunkin’ Donuts just so he could watch them all day. I actually think he left because I said that I’m watching I’m listening like a hawk all day every day and so now that he knows I’ve been listening the whole time he builds because he doesn’t need to be here dealing with her school literally screaming all day every day because I’m already listening to it. So at the end of my hour and a half to two hour completely ragging on the rant and making fun of them and I told his ass what is he doing with her “she looks like a gremlin you probably put a bag over her head, how can you fuck h I said why don’t you real her crazy ass in and she looks like she’s 60 but she acts like she’s 12 blah blah blah , I said the words disrespectful revolting and repulsive many times. At the end I said I’m gonna make myself a fuckin cake & at the end maybe I’ll call the cops …maybe I will maybe I won’t …..want to see how I feel La La La just completely fucking with them. I lied several times and told them that I already called the building management and I lied to them and told them that I had cameras outside and inside I have cameras but I lied about where they were and I told her if I call the cops on them just once that they’re out of here “because that’s the rules of Samia”. That’s not technically their rules, but they will kick them out if I call the cops on them. Especially if I call cps AND the cops. I listed off everything they had been doing the past 13 days- that’s whybhe initially left, because he was probably like “yeah this girl is fucking just bye bye. “

I don’t see how he ever could have come back four hert mmg to. Him and listening to that crazy shit all day long with that’s the craziest fucking shit I’ve ever heard in my life and I’ve heard some crazy fucking screaming crazy shit in my life and nothing like this girl I mean even Can’t lol couldn’t beat this girl in crazy town. I mean I went off. And once I heard it laughing at my jokes I knew he was home so I kept wheeling the jokes out and he kept laughing and laughing and she was fucking pissed and he left before she even woke up in the morning and had to let her out for her ass- i’m fuckin one fiddle string pluck away from calling the cops and telling THEM to call cps.

[jeyramarie]

don’t touch my girl- Fezco x Reader (Part 2)

summary: fezco gets a new roommate and you don’t love the idea

wc: 2,949 

warning: guns, drugs use/description, cursing, almost smut (there will be in the future), cal jacobs 🤡

a/n: here it is!! as people requested. i hope everyone enjoys it, i’m feeling a bit anxious about it since the first part did so well sooo hopefully y’all like this one just as much 🥲 feedback is appreaciated, lmk if you wanna be tagged and see y’all next week, happy reading 🦋

part 1~

You stayed with Fezco that night. He wanted you close, having the slight fear that Nate was fine and was going to come back for him. You helped him with his knuckles and basically questioned him the whole night about why he would do such a thing. Why do it in front of so many people? Why risk it that much? But instead of a full constructed answer, he answered with: 

“Ion wanna get you involved, ma.” 

“Involved in what?” 

“Stop askin’ so many questions, babe. I ain’t gonna answer shit.” He replied and stood up from the couch, walking towards the bathroom to get in the shower. 

“I’m sorry, Fez!” You shouted before slumming against the couch again, sighing in defeat. 

You stopped asking questions and a few days after that Custer, Faye’s boyfriend, called asking Fezco for help. Apparently, the bitch pushed the motel manager over the railing from the second floor and of course, the cops were after her. And Custer’s brilliant idea? To send Faye, a junkie, to a drug dealer’s house. Saying that you were pissed was an understatement. You were furious. 

You couldn't believe that someone could be so stupid but yet, there you were. Sitting next to Fez in the car, on your way to pick up Faye behind a dumpster. You both pulled up in an alleyway and the headlights shone brightly which made it easy to find the blonde peeking her head out of a corner. She bolted towards the car, getting in the backseat before Fez drove off as you turned around in your seat to look at her. Her nose was bloody and it ran down to her lips. 

“Don’t look at me like that.” Faye said with a defensive attitude causing you to raise your eyebrows and turn back around. 

“The only reason that I went so crazy is because the motel manager kept saying such mean things.” She continued, trying to explain. 

“I honestly don’t give a fuck.” Fez said, never taking his eyes off the road. 

You all made it back home and Faye sat down on the little stairs that led to the living room while you walked past her to go to the kitchen. You grabbed a paper towel and handed it to her so she could clean up before going back to do the dishes. Fezco finished emptying his pockets and walked in Faye’s direction. 

“Yo, don’t touch nothin’ “He said walked past her. 

“Don’t talk to Ash.” 

“Okay.” she muttered. 

“And don’t go in my fuckin’ room, all right? That’s private for me and my girl.” Fez sat at the dining room chair, going back to the sandwich you made him for dinner. 

“I promise.” Faye replied looking up to see you in the kitchen. 

“Want some of my sandwich?” Fez offered, feeling nothing but pity for the girl. 

“Okay.” She stood up and walked up to the dining room area before sitting next to him. 

“I can make you one if you’d like.” You said from the kitchen. You didn’t see this, but Fezco was mouthing ‘say yes, they’re fuckin’ amazing’ to the blonde which caused her to slightly chuckle. 

“Um.. yeah, I’d love one!” Faye shouted back. 

Ash didn’t talk to Fez after seeing Faye in the house. He was that pissed. You attempted to be the mediator but it went to shit when Astray slammed his bedroom door. Everything you all say for breakfast, Ash would stand up and leave whenever Faye sat down. Like that particular morning. 

You gave the boys some cereal and as they ate you made yourself some coffee. After a moment, Faye walked out with the shortest skirt you’ve ever seen, an open vest and her bralette underneath. You looked at her for a second and went back to what you were doing but the shock was too much. 

Faye was bending down with the fridge door wide open to grab a Coca Cola can which made her ass peek out from the back. You looked towards the boys to see Ash looking at her in annoyance and slight disgust before turning his eyes back to Fez, giving him a death stare. She closed the fridge and walked towards the dining room which made Ash get up and leave. 

“Good morning!” She said, opening the sofa can with her foot on the table. 

“Morning.” Fez muttered and continued eating his cereal. He finished his bowl and stood up, going to the kitchen. 

“Thanks, ma.” He muttered and pecked your forehead. 

“You’re welcome. Now… who's gonna tell her to stop wearing that?” You whispered and turned off the faucet before turning around as you crossed your arms over his chest. 

“Wearing what?” 

“Did you not see that skirt?” You questioned. 

“The only ass I have my eyes on is yours, ma. Don’t worry ‘bout anything.” He whispered as he walked closer to you.

“She’s been looking at you funny…wearing sexy outfits and shit… it’s annoying as fuck, it doesn’t feel good from my point of view.” You looked at him with a slight frown before you hit the inside of your cheek. 

“She just gon be here for a bit longer, I promise.” Fezco said and pecked your lips before moving away to his room to get showered. 

That night, he invited you and Faye to go over to the convenience store with him. So you wouldn’t have to stay alone with her for so long. You decided to go, suddenly feeling trapped in the house. 

The store was empty at the moment and you were leaning against the register counter talking to Fez as Faye sat at a corner looking everywhere. Ash was behind the fridges, working on the drugs and the money as usual. You were looking at the ground, chuckling at some Fez said when a customer walked in. 

“Lexi Howard.” Fezco called out with a smile. 

“Hi.” She smiled back before waving at you. 

“How you doin’?” 

“I’m good, um…” Lexi began as she walked to stand in front of the red head but stopped when she saw Faye. 

“Hi, I’m Faye.” The blonde said and smiled. 

“I’m Lexi, um.. weren’t you guys..” She said pointing at you and Fez, referring to your relationship. 

“Yeah, yeah, we together. She’s just statin’ with me for a bit, but, but she’s cool, though.” He replied, intertwining your fingers with his. 

“What brings you out here anyway?” 

“Oh, I just came to get a, a drink.” Lexi smiled and turned, walking towards the last fridge. 

“Okay, well, we got plenty of those. Um…do you need help finding anything?” 

“No, I'm okay.” Lexi replied with her arms over chest as she continued to stare at the fridge. 

“Um…Lex, that’s the malt liquor.” You said softly as you stood up straight. 

“Yeah, I know.” She muttered and looked to the side, watching Cal Jacobs walk in. You could tell she was nervous. Lexi’s body language changed and her face radiated fear along with uneasiness. 

“Good evening.” Cal said, causing you to look at him, as well as Fezco. 

“Hello.” You smiled and almost immediately frowned when you saw an odd shape in the pocket of his jacket. 

It looked like a gun. Of course, you didn’t want to risk it so you acted like you were reaching for something next to Fez which made you end up next to him. So, in case anything went south, you were covering him. Cal walked down the side of the store, walking in front of Faye, who followed him with his eyes. 

“What’s up, man?” Fezco muttered, following him with his eyes as well. He turned to Lexi scared and then turned to look at Ash in between the shelves of the fridge. The teen looked at Cal and as well as in there, you could feel the tension in the store. 

“You got any spearmint gum?” He asked, looking at you. 

“I’m not sure, the gum’s over there.” You replied, pointing behind you with your thumb. Cal walked slowly past you, looking down at you which made you reach back to grab Fezco’s leg. As he got closer, Lexi walked away to the back of the store, trying to get away from him. 

“This your store?” He asked, grabbing the gum packet before walking to the back of the store where Lexi was hiding. 

“It’s a family business.” Fezco replied, grabbing your hand that was on his thigh. 

“Do your parents own it?” 

“You usually ask this many questions, man?” 

He appeared back in front of you, with a bag of chips in hand. Your eyes drifted to the side a bit, sneaking a look at Lexi to see that she was unharmed but still looking down in fear. 

“Just you.” Cal said, looking at Fezco. 

“She tell you who I am?” He asked, nodding his head towards Lexi. His eyes drifted to you, looking at you up and down which caused you to shift in your spot. Now you know why Nate always made you feel uncomfortable. His father was the same way. 

“Nah, man.” Fezco replied. 

“Are you a cop?” Faye asked. 

“No.” He turned to her and placed his hand back in his pocket. The shape of the gun came into view again, causing you to stand up straighter, attempting to cover up Fez a bit more. Ash was seeing this so he grabbed the cereal box and reached his hand inside to grab the gun, getting it ready to shoot. Cal’s hand moved out of the pocket to reveal a 20 dollar bill, which he slid next to you, under the register. 

“Just a concerned father.” He muttered before turning around to walk back to his car. Fez stood up and walked out, watching him drive away as the lights began to flicker over him. 

You walked towards the back to find Lexi but saw her run out to her bike. You followed but she paddled fast, getting far away from the store. 

“Lexi!” You shouted but she kept biking away. 

“Shit.” You muttered to yourself and turned around walking back inside. 

“Where’s Lexi?” Fezco asked, walking inside. 

“She probably went home, I don’t know but she’s long gone by now.” You sighed, leaning against the register. 

“Don’t stand in front of me like that.” Fezco said harshly. 

“Why not? I was just protecting yo-”

“Don’t ever stand in front of me like that… If he had a gun he would’ve shot you and that’s the last thing I wanna see. We clear?” He asked, raising his voice. You nodded and crossed your arms over your chest before walking to stand next to Faye. You didn’t talk to Fezco for the rest of the night. 

Around midnight, he closed up the store so it was time to go home. The car ride was quiet and you kept looking out the window as you fidgeted with your fingers. When you arrived at the house, Ash went straight to his bedroom and Faye went directly to the couch as Fezco emptied his pockets at the front door. You went to the kitchen, looking for some water as you replayed the store scene in your head. 

Fezco changed the temperature on the thermostat and walked into the living room with a shotgun. He walked across the room and closed the curtains as Faye exhaled a cloud of smoke from her blunt. You placed the empty glass in the sink and walked out of the kitchen. 

“Night.” You muttered and walked towards the bedroom without looking at Fezco. You got into the shower and after into your pjs before getting comfortable in bed. 

You must’ve been really tired cause you fell asleep waiting for your boyfriend cause a loud clutter woke you up. You lifted your head from the pillow to see Fezco peacefully sleeping next to you. His eyes fluttered open, immediately looking at you to check if you were okay. You rubbed your eyes as you got out of bed and opened the door to see a dark hallway. 

Fezco came from behind you, gun in hand as he slowly checked every room. All that was left was the bathroom so you tiptoed towards it and slowly opened the door to see Faye. She was laying on the floor, in front of the toilet with a needle in her thigh. 

“Oh… I’m sorry.” Faye whispered. 

“Fez!” You called out before walking to stand next to her. He walked in a few seconds later and just stared in shock. 

“I fell.” She whispered again. 

“Come on, kid. Let’s get you to bed.” Fez muttered and placed his gun on top of the toilet as you kneeled next to her, carefully taking out the needle. You threw it in the sink, getting it out from everyone’s reach before helping Fez pick her up to get her in the shower. You stayed with her while the redhead looked for clean clothes to put her in. After a few minutes, Fez carried her back to the couch, pulling the knitted blanket over her as you threw away the drug residue left on the coffee table. 

“Is it true you killed Mouse?” Faye whispered, causing you to whip your head to look at her. 

“Go to sleep.” Fezco replied before walking towards you to tap your shoulder. You looked up and he nodded his head towards the hallway. You stood up and cleaned your hands off on your pj shorts before grabbing Fezco’s extended hand. 

“You should call Custer tomorrow. See what’s gonna happen with her.” You whispered, walking into the bedroom. 

“Yeah, for real, I can’t let her havin’ an OD ‘ere.” He muttered, getting into bed. You hummed, walking over to your side of your bed but stopped seeing the redhead’s back towards you. 

“Are you mad at me?” You asked, making him turn on his back to look at you. 

“I ain’t mad.” 

“Look, I know it bothered you… what I did at the store but I’m not gonna apologize for wanting to protect you.” You said, shaking your head as you looked at the ground. 

“It was obvious that he had a gun and-”

“He was gonna shoot you if he decided to whip that shit out.” Fez spoke, cutting you off. 

“So?”

“So? So?!” He raised his voice. 

“Yeah, why does it matter?!” You raised your voice as well. 

“Why?! Fuck, Y/n. You don’t understand, you don’t get it.”

“What don’t I get?!” 

“That if somethin’ happened to you I would die ‘cause I can’t fuckin’ live without you!” Fezco shouted, sitting up on the bed with his back against the headboard. He sighed and rubbed his shaved head as you carefully got into bed, crawling towards him. You swung your leg over his lap and cupped his cheeks, pulling his head upward to look into his blue orbs. 

“I can’t live without you either and that’s why I stepped in front of you. I’ll cover you…as many times as I need.” You whispered.

Fezco lifted his hands from your thighs and cupped your face as your hands lowered to his chest. He pulled you in and connected your lips together. They moved in perfect sync as your hands moved lower to the hem of his white t-shirt, lifting it slightly. You pulled back from the kiss and lifted his shirt over his head before going back to cup his cheeks. 

The kiss continued, getting heated by the second as Fezco’s hand traveled under your shirt, touching your whole back. You pulled away once again and took your shirt off, giving him a clear view of your tits. Your nipples hardened almost immediately as you leaned in again to continue the kiss. Your hands traveled down his torso to the strings of his pajama pants to untie it before burying your hand inside to notice that he wasn’t wearing anything underneath. 

Fez grabbed your waist and turned you around so you were underneath him as his lips traveled down your neck. You began to whimper, feeling his beard scratch your skin as he continued to create hickeys over your skin. His lips trailed down chest and engulfed them around one of your nipples, sucking on it slightly. You bit your lip to contain your moan as Fezco pulled down your pajama shorts along with your underwear. 

“I wanna hear you, ma. Let me ‘ear you.” Fez muttered causing you to whimper as your hands ran over his shaved head. He kept kissing lower and lower until finally reaching your navel where he gave you a peck before parting from you. His lips reconnected to yours in a soft loving kiss. Your nails went down his back and onto his lower back to begin pushing down his pants. His ass was exposed, giving you the chance to lightly squeeze it, knowing it would annoy him. 

“Ey, yo, what is that?” Fezco asked in surprise as you laughed, pushing your head back while your hands went up to his shoulders. 

“I had to.” You laughed hysterically as he began to laugh too, burying his head in your neck. 

“Why you gotta grab it like that?” 

“You have a really nice ass, Fezzy.” You laughed as one of your hands went to the top of his head and the other to the back of his neck. Fezco lifted his head and looked at you as you chuckled with a wide smile. He couldn’t help but admire you for a second. 

“I love you.” He muttered as you looked into his eyes with a small grin. 

“I love you too.” You whispered, tracing your fingers down his beard. 

fezco taglist: @hansakind​ @idkimjusthereliving​ @romanogersendgame​ @black-fairy3​ @bracefacelaiiiaa​ @sorceresss​ @mrsjubelova @damn-i-woke-up​ @rafecameronswhore​ @mandowhatnow​ @illumi3​ @suqarszn @joonieshoney​ @hnslchw​ @stylesyourmine​

[poppyrays]

I turned the humans into animatronics guys I’m so quirky and they’re completely disconnected from their human counterparts in terms of their Background History I.e. Gregory the Honey Badger is not 100% insecure human Child who’s homeless

Gregory the Honey Bader

Vanessa the Lab Dog

Estella the Sunbear

The left bear is Sunbear whos my fuckin Sun/Freddy Child that isn’t really in lore but I do not care sue me. She controls most of the digital stuff like online interactions, photos, and walks inside sales booths advertising for sales.

Gregory and Vanessa are both part of the Security Squad and they get the fun job of playing good cop bad cop and denying entry of banned people to the pizza Plex and kicking drunks out of the DJ area. Vanessa controls security bot rotations and Gregory typically double checks everything is in line for the day with the human workers. Gregory also often is the bot who goes in the off limit areas to scan around for rambunctious or adventurous tourists and shoved them out. People usually underestimate him because he’s a smaller robot comparatively to the rest of them but he will still bodily throw a bitch.

All of them are still family friendly and are programmed to uphold relations above all things so obviously no mean sassy Gregory or angry yelling Vanessa (to the more scary degree they have in the game) but ya know. They’re still stern so they’re the mean ones.

Also Gregory has more a Older/younger brother relationship with Freddy. Vanessa is friends with moon as she hangs with him on nightly patrols. Sunbear typically hangs out with Chica and Djman+Tinymusicman. None of them in particular like Monty’s aggression (sunbear finds it annoying to have to write it over as a cute quirk rather than an alarming issue, Gregory will fucking throw hands with Monty, and Vanessa just generally would rather avoid conflict she has shit to do), and Gregory’s attitude typically clashes with Roxy.

Gregory and Vanessa have a idk homely relationship cause they were kinda built to slot into each others jobs so it’s just a well oiled wheel. Sunbear has a meek relationship with Gregory just because she doesn’t like conflict period and she’s just generally built to be amendable and happy all the time.

I have no idea how the hell afton being alive affects anything here or what the hell the story would be more like if he did exist or if there would even be a story (would there be ANOTHER CHILD instead of GREGORY? LOL) but yeah

My friend said to make them bots and I overthought like a MOTHERFUCKER

[snarkwrites]

mine | tim speedle | csi:miami

Notes:

Okay, so here’s the thing.. Those smutty one shots and the one shot I wrote at Christmas about Tim Speedle and an ofc who was an old girlfriend? They were originally part of this huge backstory I came up with years ago too and like.. Given that I’m posting the backstory in bits for Greg, I thought why not do the same for Tim. So, if you were ever wondering where the OC from the christmas one shot came from.. This is her. A little more thought out and less vague. Anything not explained there, or in the smut I’ve already posted and plan to post eventually, will be explained here.. Because fuckkit.. Might as well make this a chapter thing too...

Pairing:

Tim Speedle x OFC, Sylvie.

Warnings:

Uhh.. Angst and unresolved feelings at first. Filth you’ve all already seen but more to come.. Maybe a little action and suspense? because I have plans for this one, mhm.

Oh. Right off the bat.. Ya’ll are not gonna like Ryan Wolfe in here at first if I’ve done my job properly. Because as it went on the show, he’s gonna be... hard to warm to here. I chose to keep him in and have him, as well as Cardoza and others, working on the shift opposite of Tim.

Tagging:

@chasingeverybreakingwave​

@twistnet​ 

[ faq | tag list doc | soundtrack ] 

                                            ONE.

“Damn. Are you even gonna open this and humor a thought of going?” Eric waved around the class reunion invite that Tim had gotten in the mail and tossed on the counter. From across the room, Tim continued to dig around in the fridge, trying to find the case of beer he’d picked up on his way in.

He was refusing to answer the question.

Grabbing the case of beer, he sat them on the folding table they’d set up in the living room to play poker at and he took a beer out for himself, popping it against the counter, taking a long sip from the bottle.

Eric was already in the kitchen. Throwing together the traditional go to sandwich for their poker nights.

“Hey, that new guy’s not comin, right?”

“Wolfe? Yeah.. I think Walter with his big mouth invited him.”

“Goddamn it.” Tim swore, grumbling. “There’s just something off about the guy, I’m telling you.”

“Either way, it’s not our problem, man. He’s on the other shift, remember? Are you gonna answer my question, Speed, or do I have to drag the answer out of you, buddy?” Eric asked, giving Tim a pointed look.

Walter stepped into Tim’s apartment with Ryan coming into view right behind him. Tim’s jaw set and when Walter asked “Drag what answer out of Speed, man? What’d I miss?” as he wandered over to grab himself a beer and take a seat at the table, Tim shrugged. “It’s nothing, Walt. Forget Eric here ran his big fuckin mouth.”

“Doesn’t sound like nothin, you grouch.” Eric remarked, chuckling when Tim gave him what he thought was a silencing glare. As per usual, it did not work.

Ryan, the new guy, spoke up from over nearby Tim’s fridge, nodding to a photo booth strip held on by a magnet. “Is this your girl, Speed? Damn… you never mentioned you were seeing a model.” as he shook his head and let out a low and appreciative whistle.

Eric’s gaze settled on the photo strip and then back on Tim. Tim was all but trying not to explode. Getting defensive and touchy as he tended to whenever that particular strip of photos came into a conversation. He tried to give Ryan the subtlest shake of the head no, but it was too late.

Tim was already lost to thought, dwelling on the past.

Ryan eyed him, a brow raised. “Sore subject?” he questioned. Eric glared at Ryan and grumbled, giving Tim a silent look of agreement about the new guy. Tim nodded and smirked, mouthing back “Told you so, idiot.” before fixing his gaze on Ryan and shrugging. “Not really, no. We dated for a while.”

“High school and college.” Eric spoke up, ignoring Tim’s glare. “What? It’s true, right? That’s not just a while, Tim. That’s literally almost a decade, man.” 

“Are you going to let me answer the guy Eric,or nah?” Tim asked, giving Eric another pointed glare as he took the worn deck of cards and shuffled them a few times, starting to deal. When Eric went quiet, Tim continued. “I took the job here. We broke up.”

“The man is lying. What happened was he didn’t ask her to come with and she didn’t try to stop him. So they never actually broke up. They just lost touch. And if you got that invite man, maybe…”

“Invite to what?” Ryan asked, an amused look as he fixed his gaze on Tim. So far, he got the suspicion that neither Tim nor Eric were particularly warming up to him, but it didn’t really matter. He was there because Walter asked if he wanted to play a few hands. And given that of everyone they worked with, so far Walter was the only real welcoming member of the forensics team on either shift, he wasn’t about to turn it down.

If nothing, he figured, he could show Eric and Tim up in a game or two and then leave… Unless the current conversation and it’s effect on Tim Speedle proved to be too interesting and amusing to continue to pass up.

“Class reunion. If I wanted to go back and listen to a bunch of douchebag jocks talk about their glory days, I’d go.” Tim answered, grumbling and shifting around in his chair, wondering when in the hell they were all going to get off the subject.

“She might be there man, you never know.”

“Eric, if it were going to work out in the first place, one of us would’ve said or done something. We wouldn’t have just left it the way it was.” Tim pointed out. Turning his attention to his hand as he rubbed his chin thoughtfully, brown eyes carefully surveying the other men around the table.

He smirked when he realized that of them all, the only one who was really good at keeping a consistent poker face was Eric. Then again, Tim thought to himself, Eric knows me too well. He knows I learned how to read him like a book years ago. 

“She’s in Miami right now, actually. I saw her in the lobby of that high end hotel earlier today when our team got called to work that double homicide.” Ryan smirked as he just casually dropped the bombshell. Holding Tim’s gaze a few seconds. Trying to get a read on the guy, see if he might have a winning hand this round.

Tim nearly choked on the sip of Michelob he’d taken and eyed Ryan. The guy had to be trying to bullshit him. Probably to cover for his lack of a poker face, Tim mused, smirking at Ryan as he did so. “She lives in New York, buddy. You probably saw somebody who looked like her. I doubt you saw her.”

“Oh trust me… You don’t see a girl like that a time or two and confuse her with somebody else.” Ryan smirked right back, waiting on his words to hit the intended mark before dropping the bigger bombshell. “Her name is Sylvie, right? Because that’s what the frat boys hounding her for selfies and autographs called her.” 

Just the slightest drop of Tim Speedle’s jaw was enough to make Ryan’s entire night. At this point, he was just genuinely enjoying having a rib at the guy. It wasn’t a secret around the lab that Eric Delko and Tim Speedle were nothing if not tight knit. That’s why it surprised more than a few people when the two seemed to just welcome Walter with open arms and no hesitation. And yet, they went above and beyond to cop snide attitudes with both himself and another man he worked with, Jesse Cardoza.

Tim eyed Ryan, a brow raised. Then he just shrugged. “It’s your play, Wolfe.” he barely managed to unclench his jaw enough to say it, but he did. He hoped that his tone would clearly indicate that for tonight, the topic was over. Even though he knew already that no thanks to Ryan’s words, tonight was going to be a long one for him…

Was she really in Miami? Or was Ryan just being an asshole as per usual?...

,, he’s gotta be saying it to get a rise and more of the story outta me… that’s it... unless she’s here. She does travel a lot, man.. Your ma is always real quick to tell you about every single move she makes when you call back home every Sunday.” Tim shoved the intrusive thought out of his head and it was immediately followed by another. ,, It’s been years and nothing but silence. Neither of us tried to keep in touch and it’s not like we couldn’t... But.. she did come to you in the hospital that first few nights... if she wanted you to know she was there, she would have stayed, just drop the what ifs or you’re going to lose your goddamn mind.” 

Ryan made his call and Tim smirked, shoving some more chips into the middle of the table. “I see your King and raise you.”

Eric nearly spat his drink. He eyed Ryan, wondering if the guy had any idea of the wrath he’d probably just unleashed on himself by pushing buttons as openly as he had been. And he felt bad for the guy. Just because he worked with Cardoza, it didn’t necessarily make him the same.

He leaned in and offered up a quiet warning into Ryan’s ear when Tim got up to go and grab himself one of the Cuban sandwiches sitting on a plate near the stove. “You might want to lay off, Wolfe. Tim’s still hurting and bitter as hell about her, but too damn stubborn to do anything.”

“Which is fucking stupid, if you ask me.” Ryan answered, gazing across the room, smirking as he called out to Tim, “Hey, can I get another beer, man?”

Tim gave him the finger and flopped back into his chair, taking a few bites of his sandwich. “If you get up and get it, yeah. By all means.” Tim chuckled as Ryan gave him a dirty look, but after a little grumbling, he got up and grabbed himself a beer.

“What would you do if she was in town, man?” Eric was the one who asked the question.

Tim pretended not to hear him, but it wasn’t something that he wasn’t already wondering about himself. Did he even really need -or deserve for that matter, to do anything?

XXX

“6 am, sharp.”

“Rex if you remind me one more time about this stupid photo shoot, I swear to fuck, I’ll cancel. I came to Miami to relax. Not be hounded and have gigs booked for me. This was supposed to be my vacation, you’re literally not even supposed to be here.” I rolled onto my stomach on the hotel bed. The patio doors were open and the breeze blowing in off the ocean was relaxing.

Or it had been until Rex felt fit to show up and ruin things.

To be fair, I thought to myself, you’re the one who won’t just tell the guy that you’re not re-signing with his agency when your contract ends. But he seriously couldn’t take a fucking hint when I left on a red-eye and didn’t think he should know?

I was flipping through the television when I happened on a local news show. And they were showing an interview at Miami Dade PD about a pending case that was pretty huge in the media right now.

But that wasn’t what was catching my attention at all.

My eyes fixed on the five seconds glimpse I got of Tim as he hurried into the station. So handsome that I could feel my heart breaking all over again at the sight of him. I sighed and turned off the television.

I wound up on the balcony, staring down at the streets below. Wondering what he was doing right now.. Trying to imagine just how differently everything might have actually gone if I’d been braver back then. If I’d spoken up. Told him that I loved him and I didn’t want to lose touch or for us to be over.

I could’ve come with him.

And then I remembered the fear I felt the night my mom called me, fresh off the phone with his mom… The night I almost lost him.

And I remembered the feeling I felt when I finally made it to his side, a whole two days later. Seeing him lying there in that bed, hovering between life and death. The fear that he’d wake up and he’d want me to leave over-ruling every basic instinct in me that was telling me to stay. Take care of him. At the very least, get some closure. I didn’t deserve him then and the fact remained.

I don’t deserve him now, either. And too much time has gone by... I’d lost any right to tell him how I felt now. He probably had his own happy life. A better one. Who would I be to come in and lay it all on the line and destroy that?

If I’m being truly honest with myself here, I’ve never actually deserved Tim Speedle. And I’ve always known it. It’s why I had to let him go back then and a big reason why I was fighting myself so hard to keep from going to him now.

But I wanted him so badly. I needed him.

Everything felt wrong without him. I tried to move on, I tried convincing myself he was a high school and college boyfriend and my best childhood friend before that, but deep down, I knew.

Tim Speedle was, is and will always be, the man I love.

But I’m not good enough for him and hopefully, he’s moved on by now. God I hope he’s happy.

The thought had me taking a few shaky breaths and wiping away a tear that had been lingering in my eyes, threatening to roll down my cheek. I wandered back inside and even though I knew it wasn’t a good idea… I found myself searching his name.

Biting my lip as my heart skipped a beat or two when I realized that his phone number was still the same. And it was listed, not private.

I’m not exactly sure why, but I went to my contacts. And for a good ten minutes, I hovered over his name… I actually went as far as to pull up the conversation box and read over the last conversation we had. Before I realized it, I was crying again and that empty feeling was creeping back in…

,, you came all the way to Miami. You can’t keep living like this…” my brain taunted me. And then, another thought crept in, ,, if you wanted him, you shouldn’t have just let him leave without saying so. All you had to do was tell him you wanted to come. What, were you expecting some flowery proposal? For him to drop the chance of a lifetime for you? And what if he had, huh? What then? You know he would’ve hated you and by now, you two would be over… Nobody ever stays...Your own father couldn’t even be bothered to stick around, Syl… The man has probably forgotten all about you by now.”  and before my mind got any darker, I slipped off the bed and grabbed my favorite jacket. Maybe taking a ride down to the Keys would help me get this off my mind. Or driving a few blocks over, going to the beach to look at the stars.

All I did know was that suddenly, it felt like the very vast and open space in this 5 star hotel room was rapidly closing all around me.

[steamy-linguine]

New Connor (RK900 x Reader)

A/N: I had this idea kind of stuck in my head and I think I’ve revised a billion times and I wasn’t gonna post it but whatever right? It’s gotta get posted eventually. I hope you guys enjoy it. (: (Gif below isn’t mine)

Warnings: Ummm swearing?

Pairing: RK900 x Reader

There he was.

He stood by your desk with arms behind his back and his hands in a tight clasp as he looked over your stuff, looking at the photos of you with coworkers.

You watched him from the break room through the window and seeing him made something inside you twist with rage. You didn’t want him anywhere near you or your stuff but you didn’t seem to have a choice, after all he was your new partner.

Sure he was faster, stronger, and of course he was equipped with the latest technologies but no matter how much they could upgrade him, he could never replace him. He was not your Connor and it pissed you off to think that after working with him they’d send his replacement to be with you, thinking that you’d completely forget of his predecessor and the memories you shared with him.

“Your starin’ at the tin can again.” Gavin teased you as he joined your side, propping himself up against the window but your eyes never met his, too busy watching the android by your desk. When Gavin knew you weren’t going to say anything he opted to open his mouth yet again, “Don’t worry I hate him too.” 

You shook your head at him, “You only hate him because he’s an android.”

“Damn right.” Gavin agreed with you while turning to look out the window in the same direction you were now. You took a sip of your coffee as the RK900 sat in your seat and you sighed, “It’s just gonna be different without him.”

Gavin snorted, “Can’t believe you actually liked that plastic prick. I’m glad he’s gone.”

You turned giving him a disapproving look at his comment. You knew him and Connor never got along but it still wasn’t fair on poor Connor. The revolution was stopped and Connor completed his mission yet he still got deactivated.

It wasn’t right.

“He was a great Detective.” You defended him.

“He was only great because he was fucking programmed to be!” Gavin said, a bit more loudly than expected at you causing a few bypassers to stop and look at the two of you through the window. It had always bothered Gavin how much praise the android would get for doing a job it was built for and how much you cared about him.

You shook your head at him, “Gavin why did you hate him so much? He did nothing to you.”

“These things are gonna take our fucking jobs and you’re too blind to see it but of course you are. You’re only sad because you wanted to screw him.” 

Your mouth flew open at his comment not even knowing what else to say to him when finally the words came out, “Excuse me?”

“C’mon everyone fuckin’ knew it. We all saw how the way you looked at him...Whatever, when you are done cryin’ over a damn robot give me a call.” And with that Gavin left you in the break room and you watched as he approached the RK900, making some snarky comment to him probably.

The RK900 frowned at him, opening his mouth to say something that sent Gavin to stomp off to his desk and you could already tell this android was gonna be very different from Connor.

“Everything alright (y/n)?” The new voice broke you from your spying, snapping you back to reality as you turned to see the new face.

You were faced with Lieutenant Anderson who, to put it as nicely as possible, looked a complete fucking wreck. He looked tired as ever and the bags underneath his eyes didn’t compliment the look nor did his messy gray hair.

“Yeah Lieutenant.” You nodded to him and for a moment you could see him searching your eyes for more but he only turned away to go make himself a coffee.

You took that as your cue to make your journey back to your desk.

“(Y/N).” The Lieutenant called out to you.

You stopped in your tracks and turned to him, “Yes Lieutenant?”

“I miss him too.”

The words leaving his mouth tugged at your heart and immediately more waves of emotions slammed into you and you could feel the tears pricking your eyes.

You gathered whatever happiness was left inside you and you did your best to give him a ‘happy’ smile but no, you knew even in your best efforts that it still was a sad one.

You turned away from him and exited the break room while wiping the tears away from your face.

Keep it together...

“What are you doing?” You asked the RK900 who was holding a photo of you and your pet.

“I was looking at the photo.” He replied his face emotionless.

He stared at you, looking over your features. Your face was slightly red and your cheeks still held some moisture to them from your tears.

(Y/N) HAS BEEN CRYING?

The suggestion appeared in his view on the side of you and his eyes narrowed as he stared at you.

“Well move. That’s my seat.” You said while sniffing.

He said nothing else as he got up and watched you reclaim your spot. “Your desk is right here so go sit down and do your damn job.” You instructed.

He complied (of course) and sat in the seat across from giving you one last look before turning the other way.

***

It had been a few hours that passed by and he sat at the desk across from you still not making any efforts of conversation with you but only looking at you from time to time.

He couldn’t quite understand why you were so upset with him. He did everything you asked and he kept to himself yet you were so quiet and mad.

Whatever your issue was, you were letting your emotions get in the way and that bothered him.

You would catch him staring at you, his hardened stare making you even angrier.

He could at least fucking pretend to be happy to be here. You thought to yourself but you almost forgot.

He wouldn’t feel happy. He wouldn’t feel a damn thing he was built not to deviate like his predecessor, the one CyberLife was currently pulling apart to figure out why he deviated.

“You seem distracted Detective.” The RK900 spoke.

“You could say that.” You said quietly through gritted teeth not wanting to converse with the replacement.

“Something you would like to share with me?” He asked and you could hear the annoyance in his voice.

What the hell could he be annoyed for?

“No, now leave me the hell alone.” You hissed.

This time he frowned at you. Why were you so difficult? He tried to at least be civil with you and you were only this aura of anger. He couldn’t quite understand it.

“Detective I’m sensing hostility in your tone toward me.” He confronted you.

“And what of it?” You asked him now meeting his cold blue eyes.

His jaw tightened and his brows furrowed, “This type of attitude if not suitable for the workplace. If we’ll be working together I would suggest you become less difficult.”

You snorted, “God you don’t fucking get it do you? You think you can come in here and just fucking replace him?!”

Replace him?-Oh. The RK900’s artificial mind finally wrapped around your emotions. You were still grieving over his previous model.

His head cocked to the side as his eyebrow raised at you, “Were you close with the RK800?”

This made you contemplate even explaining to him. You knew he wouldn’t understand. He’d only say some other shit to you about ‘workplace’ and you didn’t want to hear it.

“I’ve gotta go.” You said. You quickly signed off the computer and gathered your things.

He watched you leave in a hurry and you left, making your way to the exit doors as his new tasks appeared into his view. His LED beginning to cycle from blue to yellow.

GO AFTER (Y/N)

LET (Y/N) LEAVE

As badly as he wanted to let you leave he opted with following after you.

You hugged the coat tighter against your body as the winter air slapped you right in your face, making your teeth chatter slightly.

You made your way to your car which was parked across the street, something that rarely would happen considering parking was so hard to find here.

You pressed the button on your keys and the car beeped letting you know it was unlocked.

“(Y/N).” The familiar voice stopped you.

You turned around and saw the android making his way over to you and you rolled your eyes.

“Just leave me the hell alone okay? Go be partners with anyone else.” You told him.

He stopped and frowned at you, “I was instructed to partner you and that is what is going to happen.”

“Yeah well I don’t want you to be my fucking partner.” You told him once more.

“Were you close with Connor?” He asked you yet again.

You looked away from him, “Why do you care?”

You turned around and reached for your car door and opened it but a hand came down onto the door slamming it shut.

“I asked you a question.” He said now a lot closer to you and towering over you.

His eyebrows still furrowed and those cold eyes stared right into your own. For a moment you could see Connor, but of course you would, due to the extremely similar appearance but either way you would always be able to tell the difference.

“Answer me Detective.” His tone now more demanding and your eyes began to look everywhere else.

For a moment you said nothing and he grabbed your chin, making your eyes meet his, and the two of you locked gazes again and he took the time to run a scan on you. Your heart rate quickened and your breathing picked up. He could tell you were nervous-no. No no you were scared.

“Do I scare you Detective?” His voice coming out softer now as he let go of your chin.

You never thought you two would ever be this close.

You shook your head, “No.”

“Don’t lie to me Detective. I’m not going to harm you but I asked you a question. Were you and Connor close?” He asked again. He could just leave it alone but even an android could become curious.

You let out a shaky breathe as you tore your eyes away from his.

“I loved him.” You confessed to him as a few tears began to roll down your cheeks.

You saying this made something inside of him turn. The RK900 wasn’t built to feel. He was made to assist cops on cases and test samples as fast as the speed of light but not to feel yet somehow he felt, and what he felt was pity for you.

You had fallen in love with an android that even after he did his task, you’d never be able to be with him.

The RK900’s features soften at you saying this and he reached out to wipe the tears from your cheeks.

The gesture surprised you but nonetheless your face settled into his palm. You, of course were still angry with him but it was nice to be touched again the way he used to do it.

He removed his hand and took a step back from you.

“I think you should go home. Your coat is too thin for this kind of weather Detective and you could get very sick.” He said and you would’ve protested, considering how stubborn you are, but you instead only nodded.

“Okay..” You croaked out.

He pulled open the door for you as you climbed inside your car.

“I do hope that whatever anger you have toward me will be disposed soon so we can get along better. I have looked through your file and I was very impressed Detective. I will see you tomorrow.” He told you.

You knew it wasn’t his fault for him being here. It wasn’t his fault for Connor being deactivated. It was CyberLife’s.

You huffed knowing that he was right. Keeping up this attitude wouldn’t help anything and you’d be no better than Gavin having random outbursts.

“I’ll see you tomorrow.” You told him before shutting your door.

You shoved the key into the ignition and the car roared to life and you began your way back home.

He stood in the same spot watching you drive off.

[morwensteelsheen]

Can't recall if you've answered this but any headcanons on Faramir's relationship with Imrahil and the other Dol Amroth family members? And just what would they make of him having a fear of the ocean as you've mentioned before?

Oh yeah so I did a bit of that here under the guise of Éowyn, so if it sounds like I’m sort of repeating things that’s why. Here’s Faramir’s side —

Lothíriel

 I’m going to start with her because I think she’s my most controversial take. I don’t really see her as this firebrand as I think the general fanon interpretation is. Instead, I sort of envision her as similar to Finduilas in that she’s a bit more Content with the state of the world and her relationship to it than e.g., either Éowyn or Faramir. Because of this I think Faramir always sees her very much as The Younger Cousin in a way that isn’t necessarily true for any of the Dol Amroth youths. I think he’s maybe a bit conflicted about her marrying Éomer, though largely because I see that as a political marriage whereas he and Éowyn just aren’t. And I think because obviously Éomer and Aragorn are so close, he sees Éomer in the same age bracket (if that’s even possible with these Númenórean weirdos) and not so much with Lothíriel. I don’t think they have a hugely close relationship, but I think the common fanon interpretation that they’re both really into music is delightful and something I sign up to very happily. I think largely they’re maybe not as close as some portrayals (including some of my own) show them. That said, I think they do have a lot of similarities, and I think the people that come to their family dynamic late (Éowyn, Éomer, Aragorn) see it more clearly than they do. I think Lothíriel is more given to that sort of old-world longing that Faramir is, though maybe not in as overtly an intellectual way, and I think she certainly figured herself as a guardian of certain moral and political norms, which Faramir definitely does. Still, Faramir’s like a year away from entering the army (in my HC) by the time she’s born, and that plus the inevitable gendered divisions means they’re maybe not super close. Éowyn’s latter day relationship with Lothíriel certainly changes that though, and this is not to say that they’re exactly distant. They’re just not besties.

Amrothos

I didn’t actually realise this was a controversial take until quite recently? But Amrothos is a HUGE nerd to me. He’s basically Faramir if Faramir got to play al his personality faults to the end instead of being forced to engage with reality/politics as they really are. And not that Faramir exactly does that a huge amount pre-death of everybody he loves, but Amrothos really doesn’t have to do it. Actually in a lot of ways Amrothos is my shameless self insert whenever I write in that he’s a huge dweeb who isn’t super interested or capable of interacting with other people and mostly self isolates. I like Altariel’s interpretation (on AO3) that he’s there for the Osgiliath bridge but in my HC he’s way, way more sheltered than that. It’s no knock on him, I think in a lot of ways he ends up acting as a brilliant bridge between the Third and Fourth Ages aa someone who remembers the war but isn’t necessarily scarred or made cynical by it, but definitely believes more in the prosperity of peace etc. He and Faramir get on like a fucking house on fire; at first, when he’s younger, Amrothos trails Faramir like a puppy, but later once F’s been to the war, he sees Amrothos more like a touchstone and definitely does whatever he can to spend time with him.

Erchirion

lmao I love the idea of Erchirion as a huge himbo???? I’m so sorry, he’s just my Lancelot and there’s really no avoiding it. Erchirion is the embodiment of what Faramir sees Boromir as: brazen, arrogant, a bit hedonistic. To clarify, I don’t think Boromir is these things, but I absolutely think Faramir casts Boromir in those terms when he’s at his crankiest. Erchirion, however, absolutely is those things and is supa, supa proud of it. He’s definitely got the most contentious relationship with Imrahil, but I think Faramir sort of treasures his relationship with Erchirion because it gives him the chance to gently tease/chide someone who, to him, embodies Gondor’r worst excesses. Though he and Erchirion of course are similar in that they are (for their pre-war lives) both the second son and therefore largely absolved of any real responsibility, I still think there’s a bit of a gulf there in that Faramir feels like this military shit is forced onto him by circumstance whereas Erchirion kind of picks it. Still, I think it’s sort of cathartic for F to rib Erchirion and Erchirion absolutely does not give a fuck because he’s rich, good looking, and connected to hella power.

Elphir 

I think they’ve actually got the closest relationship of all of Imrahil’s kids, largely because I think Elphir’s of a similar sort of attitude to Faramir. I think Elphir’s very much been moulded in Imrahil’s likeness, and I think he’s got that sort of flamboyant charisma I imagine Imrahil to have, but it’s been way, way toned down in light of his ongoing service in the war effort (whatever that looks like). Also, he and F are quite close in age so they’ve just had more time to mellow out their relationship and sort of play the Woe Is Me, War Is Shit stuff, which really brings them together. Elphir is married and a father well in advance of Faramir, and so I think Faramir occasionally looks at Elphir and sees something of what his life might have been like. Not in a bitter or jealous way, just in a very detached, academic sense of wonder.

Imrahil

I am getting hella deja vu here because I feel like I’ve said this before but I think Imrahil’s relationship to Faramir pre, say, TA3001, is basically exclusively familial with no political edge to it. Once Faramir comes Of Age relatively speaking, I think Imrahil realises Faramir’s far more amenable to taking divergent positions from his father’s line and tries to use that to his advantage. Not in a cruel way, just in a way that’s realistic about how politics works. Sometimes F agrees, sometimes he doesn’t. Either way, that long term negotiation with his uncle re: politics means that when they get to the point of F being steward, they’ve got a really good sense of how the other works and an inarguably honest relationship. Probably bluntly so. I’ve always imagined that Imrahil is the one to break the news about Denethor’s death to Faramir and that’s as much about defending his sister’s last living son as it is about protecting the fraught political situation.

Ivriniel 

I think Faramir constantly has a similar relationship to her that a rowdy teen might have to a strict mother. I don’t think that ever changes, even when he’s literally the Steward of Gondor and, in fact, I think that brings a tremendous and invaluable sense of normalcy to both of their lives. I think F doesn’t have any strong opinions on her and Éowyn sniping at one another except that it’s good craic.

The Faramir being scared of water HC is wholesale plagiarised from @khokali but I think Imrahil, Elphir, Erchirion, as sailors of some sort or another, are all fuckin merciless about taking the piss out of Faramir for it. Amrothos is sort of ambivalent except that he thinks it’s weird that Faramir doesn’t take even a distant scholarly interest in the sea, and Lothíriel is very, very empathetic but doesn’t really outwardly argue for that. Ivriniel absolutely does not give a fuck, she has more important things to think about than children being scared of water.

Edit: I should say— after a certain age I think Faramir is (correctly) taught that his emotions are very political, and so learns to be careful about who he reveals them to and when. Unfortunately, he cops to the ocean-fear stuff when he’s a kid so that shit sticks with him for life. It’s really not until Éowyn comes along that he learns how to process emotions as not inherently a political statement and as something that can be felt and understood independently of pragmatic considerations. So the Dol Amroth mafia know about the sea-fear, but nobody else does, and for a very, very long time it’s his only ‘visible’ weakness.

[theshinsun]

1. as far as im concerned Kagami never left at the end of last game, that was an extended dream sequence... 2. i also totally agree with you that Kagami is prolly vers, if anything, and it was also MY PET PEEVE when people pinholed him into being a forever bottom at the peak of knb hype. 3. you keep teasing your long list of ships for Aomine PLEASE do him for the character thing lol. So far all your opinions are sending me into a realm of GOOD VALID VIBES

Omg thank you!! (I agree end of Last Game is not canon… or if it is he came right back the next year or smth I refuse to accept he just left forever. And I’m really glad to see the problem of Uke™ Kagami seems to be in decline these days… fewer people are writing for knb in general, but those that are seem to have an idea what a real gay relationship is or at least make him a fucking person and not a walking stereotype, and that’s encouraging to see). 

Also thanks so much for sending Aomine! …Strap in for this character essay tho I’ve been known to never shut up about this boy once you get me started.

How I feel about this character

I honestly… can’t even explain it anymore or even try to justify it but Aomine has had a bigger impact on me than, I think, any other character I’ve seen to date. I don’t even know what it is, I do relate to him (and project on him *cough*) but like, there are other characters out there that I have more in common with, and I like his whole arc and aesthetic but it’s nothing revolutionary, so… your guess is as good as mine. 

Whatever it is, I’ve been obsessed with this guy for over half a decade, and lately even as the KNB fandom falls into decline, my feelings are not they’re just getting stronger. His development over the course of the series is one of the most satisfying things I’ve ever seen, (that one bit at the end of the Touou/Seirin game with “I want to practice” and his later conversation with Kuroko hit me in the fucking chest every time), and I love how even though he’s portrayed as cold, uncaring and rude, it’s still understood (at least by anyone with some nuance) that that’s not what he’s supposed to be like, and underneath the distant, kind of dickish front, he’s hurting a lot. I’ve talked about the degree to which he cares about people before too, but I still have to give a mention to the ferocious level of protectiveness this guy has for his friends. I could go on about him for ages, tbh, and maybe someday I will write a for-real structured essay to try to get it out there, but the bottom line is I love this character, I have for a long time, and likely will continue to do so long into the future.

All the people I ship romantically with this character

Okay here we go… I ship this guy extremely liberally, even with people he’s never interacted with (hell you could mention any random character and I could probably see my way clear to shipping them with him somehow, I’ll still try to explain my logic if I can). Prepare yourself.

Kagami (of course, AoKaga is the OTP and definitely the one I’ve devoted the most time to, they’re just the best together I’ll never get tired of seeing them figure their shit out over and over)

Kuroko (I may be AoKaga on main, but I’m still such a sucker for the tragic romance between these two, and sometimes it just hits me over the head like a sledgehammer how much I love their relationship. I’ve also got a lot of feelings for AoKagaKuro, they’re such a perfect trio and I need to invest more of my time in the OT3)

Kise (I was a bit late to the game on AoKise, but I definitely see it now. I love their dynamic and how imperfect their relationship would probably be, the complexity of it. sign me up)

Momoi (I don’t see a lot of AoMomo love anymore, but I’ve still got a soft spot for it, childhood friends are my weakness okay)

Midorima (they’re so different but that’s what makes it interesting, and I love the idea of neither of them knowing how to show/tell the other their feelings and being awkward stubborn shits together)

Murasakibara (they almost never interact but I just think they’d have such a soft cuddly relationship and be really chill together… lazy Sunday mornings sleeping in and hanging all over each other that kinda thing)

Akashi (kinda same as Akashi/Kagami, I think the difference between polished upper-class Akashi and scrappy city boy Aomine would be hella interesting… though I’ve also got some angst ideas for them as a couple, after how things went down at Teiko… abandonment and whatnot)

Imayoshi (I got pulled into this ship HARD by Lysapadin’s A Firm Hand series and now it’s no longer a guilty pleasure ship and is actually something I’ll talk about in the open, just… the power dynamic fuck me up)

Sakurai (I fuckin love the idea of an anxious Sakurai crushing hard on Aomine and not knowing how to tell him but when he finally plucks up the courage and prepares himself for imminent death Aomine’s actually pretty chill about it… plus they’d be adorable together tbh)

Wakamastu (you know it’s gotta be enemies to lovers. not just bc I’m intrigued by the love/hate relationship itself but if you look past the attitude issues these two would actually probably have a lot in common. also I’m really interested in how their dynamic might change with Wakamatsu being captain and all)

Susa (idk but there’s one throwaway line in season 3 where Imayoshi says about Aomine “actually maybe he likes you” and that’s enough for me. bring me the rarest rarepair my body is ready)

Kasamatsu (it wasn’t supposed to be SERIOUS but they got me. That moment in the Touou/Kaijo game where Aomine helps him up and “you’ve really done it now, senpai” is legit, plus these two would be such a good-looking couple, honestly.)

Mibuchi (give me the pretty boys. I have no excuse for this except maybe their interactions in my own damn fic again)

Nebuya (sometimes shipping can be as simple as hey I want them to bang right. also they’re both humongous dorks under their respective rough exteriors and I love them)

Moriyama (they bond over liking girls at first and then they’re simultaneously like wait a minute… more Touou/Kaijo ships pls)

Nijimura (I have this idea of them reuniting late into/after high school and Aomine still calls him captain out of habit and Nijimura’s like relieved and impressed to see how he’s developed since the mess at Teiko)

Himuro (they Never interact but they’d be so Petty and Snarky sign me up)

Haizaki (twisted, but I’m interested it’d be so unhealthy and awful bring it)

Hanamiya (even more twisted tbh but there is that moment where Aomine confronts him… and I’m here for hate sex just as much as your typical romance)

Inoue (who, you ask? I know he’s such a side character and no one remembers him, but he’s a big reason for Aomine’s downfall at Teiko and they seemed to be buddies before that, I’d be interested in some kind of reconciliation between them, or a romance, ya know whatever works)

And then we get into crossover territory… MOST of these are not my fault they’re just things I’ve seen and adopted for myself

Kuroo Tetsurou (someone made a moodboard for them, and now I can’t stop thinking about them in a relationship, like damn… it’d be such a beautiful mess I wanna see more of it)

Oikawa Tooru (I’ve seen art, and also the light. These two damaged angsty prodigies, one sharp as a whip the other dumb as bricks, but both of them sassy and nerdy as hell. I could see myself getting addicted to this ship if I took the time to write it out, and I just might)

Yamazaki Sousuke (can’t lie, they look good together. I’ve seen more than one art piece of them interacting and I have a Mighty Need.)

Matsuoka Rin (angry lonely talented boys finding solace in each other’s company? you know that’s my shit. also shark teeth and cop AUs hells yeah.) 

Tanaka Ryuunosuke (I don’t know where the fuck this idea came from but I thought of Tanaka trying to pick a fight with “shitty boi” Aomine while in Tokyo and then losing his shit and here we are)

Terushima Yuuji (this one is purely physical… they pretty, I have no other reason, but also this absolute fuckboy, these two would be such a train wreck and I’m here for it tbh)

Yachi Hitoka (okay picture this Giant Terrifying basketball player trying to be less giant and terrifying to tiny shy Yachi and tell me you don’t just want to see that happen. I get Legosi/Haru vibes.)

I’ll spare you the rest of the ideas I’ve tossed around, because past this point it becomes pure crack (if it hasn’t already) but you get the idea. Throw a character my way and I can probably talk myself into it that’s the power this guy has over me. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

My non-romantic OTP for this character

K considering the List… it shouldn’t be surprising that I also consider this person a romantic candidate, but you know when it comes to non-romantic OTP it’s gotta be Momoi. Platonic or romantic, the way she’s stuck with him all those years and his obvious protectiveness and love for her and how (even though he claims to like big tits) he never even once starts to objectify her in any way, it’s so important to me. Momoi is Aomine’s redeeming factor when he’s at his worst, and she goes to bat for him even while he’s actively trying to shake her off and still tries to protect and help him when he refuses to accept it, even when it means they fight. (Also Kuroko saying “Aomine’s probably looking for you” after their argument puts to mind Aomine running through the rain calling Momoi’s name and that is just… pure). These two have the kind of unshakable long-standing friendship that’ll probably last them the rest of their lives, and no matter what context or form it takes, I can’t get enough of it. 

My unpopular opinion about this character

I’ve harped on enough about the fandom’s portrayal of Aomine as a one-note asshole who doesn’t care before, so let’s see if I can change gears a little bit here. 

I honestly don’t agree with… the persistent idea people seem to have of Aomine being a narcissist or obsessed with himself? Like yeah, he’s self-absorbed and egotistical, no question, this is not to say he hasn’t got those flaws and others besides… but that’s not the same as being like, physically attracted to yourself. Part of me suspects it was a “the only one who can fuck me is me” joke taken too far, so that now the idea of Aomine being in love with himself is just ingrained into the fanon culture, but if you look at the show itself, personally I don’t see it. If anything, I would think he’d have some self-loathing issues to work through (and that’s part of the reason he gave for skipping practice, he doesn’t want to be the way he is, and specifically says he doesn’t want to increase the difference between him and everyone else). But hey, that’s just my opinion. I’ll get off my soapbox now.

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon.

I mean he says he and Kagami are postponing their match, after their brief one-on-one when he gives him the shoes, and then we never get to see it… Tbh just more street ball with this guy would be great, since it’s what his whole style is based around. Even if he’s just playing by himself… or hell, maybe since he thinks no one at the high school level can beat him, we could get a scene of him trying to go up against adults. Maybe he still beats them and his despair worsens after that, but then it’d have more meaning, and at least we’ll have seen that he’s tried and is not just giving up before he’s seen all of what he could be up against in the future. Plus, picturing Aomine going five-on-one like Haizaki did against grown-ups and still slaughtering them is something I’d pay money to see. 

[detroitwhatitmeanstobehuman]

Chapter 10 - The Difference Between Us

Part 10/17 of What it Means to be Human

Word Count: 8226

Warnings: Swearing, bullet wound fixing.

Genre: Self-insert/Hurt/Comfort/Fluff

Pairing: OC (Detective Rachel) X Connor

Rating: Mature

Summary: Returning from the Stratford Tower, Rachel insists without taking any refusal from Connor that she must repair him immediately after he’d been shot by a deviant. Hank helps out as best as he can and he can very clearly see the connection between them, even if they don’t, yet. But the most important thing right now was getting Connor fixed up, so Hank was ready to do whatever Rachel needed him to do to help.

First Chapter | Previous Chapter

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“Just stay in the hallway and let me grab a couple towels.” Rachel ordered Hank and Connor before running off up the stairs on all fours. Yet another strange quirk for her, but Hank couldn’t be bothered to judge her for it. Not when he was still pissed at Connor for not taking him seriously yet again and this time getting hurt. But he was relieved that Connor survived and that he was okay, all things considered.

The short woman quickly returned with a couple white towels and made quick effort to drape one over the back of the large couch and the other on the couch seat next to the other. Letting out an aggressive sigh, Rachel put down the spare RK800 parts on the table and gestured for Connor to sit on the space where the towel was draped on the back of the couch. “Go ahead and sit right there.”

“Rachel, you don’t need -” The android had been protesting like that all day, and not once did Rachel have any of his bullshit.

“Sit!” She ordered, giving him the kind of hard glare that Hank had seen enough times to know not to argue with. The kind he knew meant “get your shit together, or I’ll have to whip you into shape for you, and if you refuse to let me take proper care of you, I will kick your ass.”

Connor seemed to get the message and did as he was told, walking around the couch to take a seat, his back resting against the towel and the other towel at his side. Rachel ran a hand through her hair, pressing her other into her face. “I just texted Bianca to let her know and hopefully she can help me fix you up.” She then turned to her toolset she kept under the table and pulled it up, opening it. “But until she replies back, I’ll have to take a look at the damage. Hank, you can sit on that couch over there.” She gestured to the one to her left closest to the window.

“Gladly.” He huffed, sinking into the chair with a groan. Bear quickly settled beside Hank, sniffing at him, probably catching Sumo’s scent on him. The lieutenant was familiar enough with Rachel to have met Bear enough times. The large black dog simply laid down next to Hank, and he couldn’t help but absentmindedly scratch at the dog’s head gently.

Rachel then turned to Connor, standing over him with her hands on her hips. “Alright, I’m gonna need you to take your jacket and your shirt off.”

Connor was clearly going to object. Fuckin’ son of a bitch never did what he was told. “I don’t think -”

Suddenly Rachel leaned forward, grabbing Connor by the tie, yanking him towards her and pressing her forehead against his, fixing him with another hard glare. “Off. Now.” She ordered, her voice being the kind that Hank knew meant business.

Connor then began complying without question, his LED spinning red for a moment before slowly transitioning to yellow and then back to blue. As Connor began disrobing, Hank couldn’t help but be impressed with how easily Connor obeyed her commands. Despite the fact that Connor never seemed to listen to Hank, much to his increasing frustration, this was one of the moments that Hank was glad that Rachel was assigned on this case with them. She typically didn’t have to assert herself, but whenever she pulled rank, she really pulled rank. Anytime someone got shot, or someone needed backup, Rachel had no problems getting straight to business and picking up everyone’s slack.

Among a lot of things, it was one of the things Hank admired most about Rachel not just as a detective, but as a person.

She then turned around and opened her toolbox, pulling out a strange headgear with several lenses on it and a set of what appeared to be surgical grade tweezers. “Alright, first thing’s first, need to get a look and see if there’s any bullet or bullet pieces lodged in your wound.” Without any warning, she turned around and straddled Connor on the couch, and Hank couldn’t help but immediately avert his gaze and swear under his breath.

Hank suddenly felt very awkward and like he probably shouldn’t be here. The tension that he and practically everyone else noticed between them was already a lot to deal with on cases, but Hank felt like a pervert to be here while Rachel was dealing with this. And he had way too much respect for her to make her uncomfortable like that.

But she was entirely focused on Connor’s wellbeing at the moment and way too pissed at him to really even notice Hank, so he relaxed and just let her do her thing without comment. He knew that she didn’t forget he was there, but she would say something when it was important.

When he looked back, Rachel was laser-focused on the blue bullet wound in Connor’s chest while the poor fucker looked like a deer caught in the headlights, and judging by the red LED, the awkwardness of the position was clearly not lost on him. Rachel then hissed through her teeth and she looked closely at the wound. “Ugh, you are so lucky you can’t feel pain, because that looks really bad.”

“It would’ve been much worse for you.” Connor pointed out, and Rachel blinked in that way she does when something catches her off-guard as she glanced up at him in surprise. “I promised you that I would take extra precaution to ensure my own safety and preservation. But you should be more careful, because if something happens to you, you won’t be able to just get back onto your feet.”

Hank widened his eyes at Connor slightly, quirking an eyebrow at him. The android admitted just earlier today that he basically had a robo-crush on Rachel, even if he didn’t know what exactly that meant or even what his own weird robot feelings even were. But it was strange to hear him actually say it out loud without hesitation.

“Simon wasn’t going to hurt me, Connor.” She said to him. “I would’ve been fine. He was just hiding because he was wounded. That’s all.”

Hank then cocked his head at her curiously. “How do you know its name?” He asked suspiciously.

Rachel’s eyes widened. That was a look Hank recognized instantly. She’s never been a great liar, but she could at least pull off enough of one with a good enough excuse. But that was the face she made when she backed herself into a corner and couldn’t lie her way out of. “You were talking to it.” Connor said, looking down at her. “Weren’t you?”

She then closed her eyes and let out a sigh. “Yes...I was.” She answered, knowing she couldn’t hide from them.

“What did he tell you?” Hank asked. He knew Rachel had a soft spot for these deviants, but so far, her intuition seemed to be on the right track. As much as he hated to admit it, Hank’s perspectives were changing. Part of it was thanks to Rachel and the other was Connor. Rachel’s seemingly unshakable faith in deviants and androids as well as being able to seamlessly put herself in their positions much better than he ever could. And Connor...well, there was a lot about him that didn’t make a lot of sense to Hank, but he did care about Connor. And Connor’s attitudes and even his opinions were changing, too.

And that made Hank start to see things differently, too.

“I tried to get him to tell me anything about who he was with.” She explained, continuing to fish into Connor’s wound. “But...all I got was his name before you showed up.”

Connor sighed. “You still could’ve gotten seriously hurt, Rachel.”

“And you could’ve been killed.” She spat back with. “Also, I’m literally fishing in your chest for bullet pieces. Probably not a good idea to argue with your medic, Connor.”

Hank was sitting there, shaking his head at them. It wasn’t difficult to see that they had a thing for each other. Everyone else in the office (especially Gavin, the asshole) was making jokes about them going to town on each other.

It felt like the lieutenant was the only one who actually saw the care they had towards each other. Before the case, they clearly got along pretty well. As much as it annoyed Hank, they were very similar.

But something changed between them, and Hank could see it. In the Eden Club, something changed in Connor. As if his priorities completely changed. And even if they were too dense to figure it out, they were clearly drawn to each other.

And it made Hank uneasy. Because he knew Rachel’s history. It was what made him actually consider her as a friend at all in the first place. Even Hank wasn’t sure what made him feel comfortable confiding in her about his darkest feelings and moments, but he did. And she returned the favour. They gained an understanding.

And Hank had a real difficulty connecting with others. He wasn’t exactly a gentle or soft guy and was pretty abrasive. Most people didn’t really like him. And as much as he didn’t want to admit it, that fact did make him feel a lot more alone than he already was. Even his wife didn’t stick around for him or Cole, but that was fine.

Until Cole was gone.

And Rachel was a lot of the same. Different, definitely. But they were very similar. So they gained a mutual respect.

And the more Hank was able to actually see her in the field and work with her, the more that respect grew into an admiration and then a genuine connection.

And now, she was the only cop in the whole damn precinct he even considered a friend. And as far as he could tell, the feeling was mutual. Though, for her, it was less of other people just not liking her and more just her shutting herself off from others. It was hard for her to make meaningful connections.

So now that she was so drawn to Connor, an android made for the purpose of hunting deviants...it made Hank uneasy. The thought of her having to suffer another loss like Frank’s was harrowing and uncomfortable. Or worse, Connor completely destroying her by virtue of his very nature.

If there was one thing Hank didn’t want to see, it was Rachel getting her heart broken again. Both because he knew he wouldn’t be able to hold himself back from demolishing Connor, and because he knew she wouldn’t be able to either.

Usually, Rachel was pleasant, goofy, silly, and a bit of a bastard. But she was generally pretty good-natured, if a bit of an angry prickly foulmouth. But hey, so was Hank, so who was he to judge?

But very rarely, he had seen Rachel completely unhinge. And if there was ever a phrase to accurately describe how he felt about something, “scared shitless” was completely accurate. When something makes someone like Rachel, someone who for all her jokes and angry sarcastic remarks, was still a pretty faithful person in regards to other people, completely snap...someone who had so much empathy for others and could turn that empathy off when the situation called for it was someone you did not want to cross.

You might as well say your prayers and hope you don’t end up in Hell.

Hank could only remember three times she had ever snapped. And in hindsight, he knew why now. And the state she ended up leaving her unfortunate victims in was chilling, to say the least.

It made the seasoned lieutenant very thankful to be in her good graces.

So even if Connor deserved it, he would still rather not have to see it. If androids couldn’t feel pain, Rachel would find a way to make them. For Hank, it was just another reminder of how this dark and cruel world that seemed to continue to fester no matter his efforts to make it better continued to taint and rob people of their humanity. 

Even people like Rachel...who had no say in their suffering.

“So, what did you end up seeing?” Rachel asked, snapping Hank out of his dark thoughts. “When you were connected to Simon?”

Connor blinked for a moment, registering her question. “I saw something, in its memory...” He began explaining slowly. “A word...painted on a piece of rusty metal...‘Jericho.’”

Rachel briefly glanced up at Connor. “And that’s it?” She asked.

“Yes.” Connor answered. “I’m sorry...I wish there was more.”

“Don’t worry about it too much, Connor.” Rachel assured him, pulling out a small black object from his wound and placing it on the towel beside them. “Alright, I managed to dig the bullet out.” She said, lifting her headset of lenses from her head and placing it off to the side for a moment, looking over at Hank. “I’m going to check if Bianca’s responded. If she has, Hank, I need you to hold up the phone once we start FaceTiming so that she can see what’s going on and tell me what I should do. Can you do that for me?”

“Sure, I can.” Glad to be of some use, Hank got up from his seat and approached Rachel, simultaneously trying to avoid looking directly at her because of the awkward position she was in that she seemed to either be oblivious to or is completely ignoring.

A moment seemed to pass before Rachel looked back at Hank. “Alright, Bianca’s gonna call in a sec, and I’ll hand you the phone. Just point it at Connor’s wound and follow Bianca’s instructions, got it?”

“Got it.” Hank agreed.

After a moment, the phone started to ring and was answered just as quickly. “Hey, Bianca!” Rachel greeted, Hank leaning over her shoulder.

“Hey!” Bianca greeted back. “Alright, so how’s this gonna work?”

“Hank’s gonna hold you and you tell me if I’m doing this right.” Rachel explained, handing the phone to Hank. “Just hold it and Bianca will tell you to change positions if necessary.

--------

It took a decent length of time for Rachel to finish repairing Connor. Hank’s arm ended up getting tired and he had to switch arms and prop himself on Rachel’s shoulder even though he really would’ve preferred not to be physically close to the awkwardness.

But once she was done, Connor was good as new, the only evidence of any damage being the pile of bloodied parts on the towel next to them and the bloodstains on the towel on the back. “Alright, can you run a diagnostics check for me, Connor?” Bianca asked.

Connor closed his eyes, his LED swirling yellow before he came to, rolling his shoulder a bit. “All systems fully functional and operational.”

“Alright!” Rachel said, taking the phone from Hank. “You can go sit down now.”

“Thank fucking God...” He groaned not hesitating to let himself sink right into the seat he was in before. “Any longer and I think my arms were gonna fall right off.”

Rachel then gave him a somewhat sarcastic glare. “Be thankful you didn’t get fucking shot, Hank.” She said sternly. “If you or I get shot, we’re basically out of commission for a while.”

“Exactly.” Connor said, prompting Rachel to look up into his eyes. “You didn’t need to go through all this effort for me. I’m just a machine. I can still function and perform reasonably in condition. You don’t need to worry about my performance.”

Rachel blinked at him a couple times, looking down at her phone. “Hey, Bianca?” She asked. “Thanks for your help, by the way. I’m sorry it was so tedious.”

“Oh, don’t worry about it. You know I’m always here to help.” She said graciously.

“I know.” Rachel said with a soft smile. “And believe me, nobody appreciates that more than me.”

Hank couldn’t help but smile. If there was one thing that Hank was thankful for, it was that Rachel had support throughout the periods of hardship in her life. After all, it’s not like Hank had any family to run back to if he fucked up after all. His father fucked off and his mother did the best she could, even if she had her own problems that ended up getting dumped on Hank.

Hank had no one. Well, except for Sumo, but everyone knows that dogs are better than people, anyway. But Rachel was pretty good company and Hank wouldn’t give her up for anything.

And Connor...well, he’d decide once Connor stopped being such a reckless moron and listen to Hank for once.

“Alright, well I should let you go.” Bianca said, preparing her goodbyes.

“Yeah, of course.” Rachel said with a sigh. “But I’ll text you later, okay?”

“Yeah, definitely!”

“Alright.” Rachel said. “Bye!”

“Bye!”

“Love you!”

“Love you too!”

After about a second, Rachel put her phone back onto the table and looked over at Hank. “Alright, do you mind grabbing a pack of thirium?” She asked him. “There’s a crate in the dining room. It’s pretty obvious, you can’t miss it. Just take one of the bags and dump it in the bottle inside. The instructions are on the bags.”

Hank nodded, grumbling as he got up. “Yeah, don’t worry. I got’cha.”

As he made his way towards the kitchen, he heard Rachel’s voice from the living room, very much scolding Connor. “Alright, let me explain this to you.” She started, taking in a deep breath. Hank found the white CyberLife branded crate with ease and opened it. “If I get shot and survive, which is more likely than you think, I go to the hospital, get operated on, and then with bedrest, my body naturally heals itself. Granted, it means I’ll be out of commission for a while, at least a week depending on where exactly I get injured, but my body does the work for me.” Hank grabbed a bag and tore it according to the instructions on it, and started pouring it into the empty bottle he found inside, the strange blue fluid dripping into it. “If you get shot and survive, which is less likely than you think, you have to get repaired. And let me tell you, if that last like, what, half hour?”

“About an hour and a half.” Hank responded, coming back into the living room and handing the bottle to Rachel, taking a seat on the recliner on the other side of the room.

“Wow, longass time. But you get it! If that’s any indication for how difficult it is to fix your shit. And! RK800 parts aren’t exactly in circulation! You’re lucky that the repair centre stocked on parts after you showed up.” The woman was glaring Connor down as he listened intently. “But, once you do get fixed, you don’t have to rest and you can get back into the field immediately, which is admittedly pretty nice and definitely a huge advantage you have over me.” She then gave him a look that was gentle and caring, placing her hand on his. It reminded Hank a lot of the night they first actually spoke to each other at Ambassador Bridge Park. “But I don’t need you to worry so much about me. I’m a lot tougher than I look. And you’re not as tough as you feel you are, and I really need you to understand that. So, from now on, you’re wearing a bulletproof vest.” Connor was about to object before Rachel silenced him with a finger to his lips. “That’s an order! Got it?”

She removed her finger and Connor gave him the slightest quirk of a smile. “Got it.” He replied, but the android then tilted his head. “But only if you do the same.”

Rachel then gave him one of her signature smirk-and-raised-eyebrow looks as she scoffed at him. “Are you sure you’re in a position to bargain with me right now?”

“Yes.” Connor answered without any hesitation.

Rachel let out an exasperated sigh before she replied to his offer. “Alright, fine, you dumb waffle iron.” She teased. “We both wear bulletproof vests from now on. Deal?”

Connor then smiled at her. “Deal.”

They then stared at each other for a moment before Rachel leaned down, closing her eyes and wrapping her arms around him as she pressed her face into Connor’s shoulder. “I’m just glad you’re okay.” She sighed, relieved.

Then, Connor’s arms slid around her as he pressed his face into the crook of her neck, cradled by her short, wavy hair, his LED a pensive yellow. “Likewise, Rachel.” He sighed, his eyes closing.

Hank was about to say some sort of smart comment, but...he couldn’t. He was too distracted by other thoughts and memories, both recent and long past. Memories of having held someone that way before. And memories of two young women fleeing a life of violence and abuse together just to be with each other.

This moment between his two work partners stirred familiar feelings in Hank, and he let out a sigh. They’ll figure it out on their own. He thought, smiling to himself. Fuckin’ kids...

After a moment, they pulled away from each other. And finally, Rachel seemed to realize the position she was in and promptly removed herself from the couch, hiding the red that was starting to coat her face and clearing her throat exaggeratedly. “I’ll, uh...deal with these.” She mewled, quickly wrapping all the discarded parts with the towel they were put on and then grabbing the towel on the back of the couch.

She then took them and placed them on the dining table and returned, taking a seat next to Connor and avoiding his gaze. “Drink this.” She ordered, shoving the bottle of thirium in his direction.

Connor didn’t object for once, and opened the bottle to swallow it. It was so strange for Hank to see someone basically drink their own blood, but he supposed it made sense that they would drink it. It’s probably the best way to get it back into their bodies.

Connor’s hands then folded neatly in his lap like the fucker always did, even though it looked pretty ridiculous without his shirt on. The android then placed the empty bottle on the coffee table. “I’m guessing replacement clothes get sent to you by CyberLife?” Hank asked, deciding to poke a bit of fun.

“Typically.” Connor replied curtly. “Although, if you go to the repair centre, they do also provide spare wardrobes in case of destruction.”

“Ah, good to know.” Hank nodded.

The air was now quiet between them as they sat there, uncertain and listless. “So...what now?” Rachel asked, looking over at Hank. “We’re fresh out of leads. Where do we go from here?”

“I don’t know...” Connor answered, his head hanging low. “But if this investigation doesn’t make progress soon...” He seemed to hesitate for a moment. “I’ll be replaced.”

The terror that popped on her face as she looked over at him was palpable, and Hank realized then that no matter how this case ended...this was going to be painful for her. “Well, then we have to think of something!” The way she looked at Hank made him feel weak. He tried to think. Anything that might give them some kind of new lead.

But then, he remembered something. When androids were first invented and exploding the markets, one name kept coming up. .

And like that, Hank knew what he had to do. “I think I’ve got an idea.” He said, getting up from his seat, feeling more sure of himself at the hope that glimmered in Rachel’s eyes. “But first thing’s first, I gotta make some calls.” He walked towards the door, casting a glance back at the pair. “I’ll let you know what the plan for tomorrow is. But until then, I think I should take my leave for now and leave the two of you be.”

Rachel nodded. “Okay, Lieutenant.” Connor said in his usual polite tone.

“Thanks for all the help, Hank.” Rachel said gratefully. “And sorry about your arms.”

“Eh, don’t worry about it.” Hank waved her off, opening the door. “Shouldn’t be too long until you hear back from me. See you tomorrow.”

“See you!” Rachel called after him.

Making his way out of the door, Hank walked up to his car. But he couldn’t help but steal a glance back through the windows. The blinds were cracked enough to still see them. The old man couldn’t help but feel a sinking feeling deep down.

A feeling that he was going to have to watch Rachel’s heart completely shatter again. And a feeling he was going to lose someone he was begrudgingly starting to think of as a friend.

But none of that matters until they’re down to their last rope. And right now, that rested on Hank.

So, getting into his car, he started the engine and backed out onto the snowy road, dreading the headache inducing thoughts of the phone calls he had to make. Let’s just hope this goes easier than it did when I canceled my cable.

--------

Date: November 8th, 2038  Time: 08:11 PM Rachel - Partner? Objective: Undefined

Soon after Hank left, once again Rachel and Connor were left alone. The android couldn’t help but still feel rather shaken. There was a tightness and a hesitance that persisted in his systems that he couldn’t shake.

He had risked danger before. He had risked getting run over by moving cars on the highway chasing the AX400. He had risked danger when he was fighting the Tracis in the Eden Club.

But this was different. Not only was he now acutely aware of his own mortality, he was afraid. And even now, hours later, it still persisted. Even though he didn’t need to breathe, he was also extremely aware of the breaths he was taking, too.

He didn’t even realize that he wasn’t paying attention to Rachel when she spoke to him, putting a hand on his shoulder. “Hey, Connor?” She softly called, causing the android to focus his gaze on hers. “You’re still thinking about it, aren’t you.”

While he would normally be able to respond, all he could find it in himself to do was nod. Compiling words, he eventually managed to speak. “I’ve never felt this before...” He quietly admitted. “It’s...I don’t know how to explain it. But it’s unpleasant. And it makes me feel...weak.”

Rachel nodded, seeming to understand. “I get that.” She sympathized. “That feeling you have right now? Imagine feeling that all the time. Imagine getting that feeling triggered by the smallest things and then having to deal with that for hours on end. That’s what it’s like living with anxiety.” She explained, but her dark eyes were patient and gentle. “But I’ve had years to get used to and figure out how to manage it. This is new for you. You’re allowed to be confused, rattled, and unsure. It’s something you have to process at your own pace in your own time. But...it’s nothing to be ashamed of, no matter what anyone says.”

That only served to make Connor even more confused and frustrated. “But I’m a machine.” He insisted. “Designed to accomplish a task. I wasn’t programmed to fail. I wasn’t programmed to feel fear.”

Software Instability ^ “But you did fail. You did make mistakes.” Rachel pointed out, not maliciously. “And you feel fear now. It doesn’t matter if it was in your programming or not, you feel it regardless. Does your fear feel real to you?”

Truth

Lie

Software Instability ^ “Y-yes.” Connor managed to choke out. “It’s...unmistakable. And it’s persistent. I can’t ignore it.”

“Then that’s all the justification you need.” Rachel said, nodding.

Software Instability ^ She then let out a sigh and leaned into him. He couldn’t help but notice the grown abundance of physical affection from her. It was significantly more frequent and Connor was easily able to deduce that it was a result of their growing relationship.

Something that certainly didn’t help his confusing feelings and reactions around her.

“Hey, Connor?” Rachel then asked. “You don’t...consume things for recreation, do you? Like books, TV, movies?”

“I can find enjoyment and interest in them.” Connor replied. “But I don’t necessarily engage in such recreational activities in the same way humans do.”

“But you read one of my books earlier.” Rachel pointed out. “Just because you know it was from my favourite series. What did you think of it?”

Sincere

Analytical

Indifferent

Software Instability ^ “I could see why you enjoy it.” He replied in earnest. “Its fantastical elements are rather charming and endearing and its brand of humour is certainly your type of humour.”

Rachel - Partner ^  She smiled, nodding. “Right. That’s exactly it.” She looked away from Connor, her posture pensive. “But it’s not just that. There are a lot of really complex and interesting themes underlying it all. Themes of war, of cost, of family, and abuse. And themes of destiny and choice. Peace and war. And the characters are all so diverse and complex and I can’t help but really like them all.”

Connor was watching and listening intently, documenting Rachel’s every word, the enjoyment and passion incredibly evident on her soft face. “I am somewhat curious, though.” He interjected. “You seem to gravitate towards fiction geared towards children and young teens. Why is that?”

“Honestly, they’re just far more interesting and engaging to read.” Rachel replied, making eye contact with him. “A lot of young adult and teen fiction is either too boring or just too depressing for me to read. Or in some cases, it’s just not that well-written. But I find that a lot of children’s stories are a lot more inventive and creative. And there’s a lot more variety in their stories and I just prefer the general tone a lot more.”

Connor nodded. “I see.”

They seemed to run out of things to talk about before Rachel let out a sigh. “I’m pretty spent for today.” She mumbled. “I could honestly just go for some TV on the couch until the day’s over. Would you want to watch with me?”

Connor gave her a small crooked smile. “I wouldn’t be able to enjoy it in the same way as you.”

Software Instability ^ “That’s fine by me.” Rachel replied, returning his smile. “I want you to enjoy it in your own way. And besides, I enjoy your company, and that’s reason enough for me.”

Connor nodded, trying to ignore the warmth he felt blooming in his chest and the rapid increase of the rate of his thirium pump that once again turned up no issues through a diagnostics check. “Then I’ll stay as long as you want me to.” He replied with a smile.

Hiding a blush, Rachel turned away from him. “I’m gonna go take a quick shower and get in my pajamas.” She said, making her way to the stairs. “I won’t be too long. It’ll be about ten minutes.”

“I’ll be sure to count the seconds.” Connor teased, relishing the small gasp that his response managed to elicit from Rachel as she made her way upstairs to her bathroom.

Soon enough, Connor noticed Bear make his way over to the android and he couldn’t resist the urge to scratch the dog behind his ears.

But even in her absence, Connor’s thoughts continued to be fixed on Rachel. Not just on her words and the small gestures of her simple existence, but on her relation to him and her reactions to him.

Connor was aware of and had knowledge of human relationships. He was aware of the dynamics between romantic and sexual partners. But to him personally, these were all merely ideas. Abstract concepts he could analyze and observe, but never truly take part in or understand from a personal level.

And he didn’t have any issue with it. After all, he had a mission and a purpose he was designed for. He had no use or desire for such things. He wasn’t made to, after all.

But admittedly, that was before he met someone like Rachel. It was all too clear that she harboured some level of attraction towards him. He didn’t even have to scan her vitals to know that, although yes he could also tell by the scans he turned up of her.

Yes, it was clear that she was attracted to him. And there were moments that he could even detect arousal from her. But like she said herself, she had her own scruples and principles and she held stringent to them despite her clear innermost desires. And the fact of the matter was that Connor was a machine. He had no free will of his own, which wasn’t a fact he particularly lamented. So she hasn’t said anything about it either by choice, or perhaps she herself wasn’t fully aware of her attraction towards him.

But it was clear that it wasn’t just an attraction towards him. She genuinely cared about him and his wellbeing. She cared about him as a person and as a friend. She trusted him.

And the android would be a fool if some part deep in his software didn’t want to participate in whatever this magnetism was. But that was just it. He wasn’t certain of what his feelings towards her even were or what they meant. All he knew was that he felt strange and that he had nothing to compare it to and that she was the source of it. So even if he wanted to, he could never be an active participant.

But even then, he didn’t care. Not because he didn’t care about her, because he did. That much he did know for certain. He did care for Rachel perhaps more than he could even understand as a (somewhat) obedient machine.

And she cared for him. Whatever she felt and whatever principles she held fast to, it didn’t stop her from caring about him. It didn’t stop her from being comfortable with him and it didn’t stop her from wanting his company and considering him a friend.

And to the RK800 model android, that was enough to make him happy. And it seemed to make her happy, as well. He could be completely content with this, even if it was unavoidably temporary.

“I’m back!” Rachel’s voice then called, as the sounds of muffled footsteps were detected behind him, and Connor turned around and saw a rather diminutive sight.

Software Instability ^ She was dressed in her pajamas from the couple nights he had spent in her bed, But draped across her shoulders was a rather soft and velvety looking white blanket, with a lot of fluff beneath for extra comfort. “I felt like being in a blanket. It’s one of...those nights...” Suddenly her face began contorting into something rather humourous. Her nostrils twitched as her eye fluttered.

Software Instability ^ Suddenly she lurched forward in what was clearly a sneeze, inhaling and holding it before letting out a small sound that was rather indicative of the mewl of a small kitten.

She then approached Connor and settled on the couch next to him, looking very comfortable and warm in her blanket. “So, I feel like watching Brooklyn Nine-Nine.” She prefaced. “It’s a comedy show about the 99th precinct in Brooklyn, centred around its detectives and captain. It’s a really fun show. And...it was Frank’s favourite.”

He nodded. “I have no particular preference as to what program to watch.” He said bluntly. “But I’ll gladly indulge in it if it’s what you want to watch.”

Software Instability ^ Rachel smiled over at him and leaned over to grab the remote control, pointing at the TV and pressing the button that said Netflix.

It soon booted up, and she navigated the menu lined up with several programs down to the Continue Watching lineup. Very quickly, she selected the title called Brooklyn Nine-Nine and navigated the episode listings, scrolling back towards the pilot episode of season 1.

She clicked on it and settled backwards as the episode began loading. It started with an opening monologue from actor Andy Samberg, portraying a seemingly serious gritty cop trying to maintain his morality in a broken system before being cut by a female Latina detective played by Melissa Fumero. Connor’s focus was interrupted by a query from Rachel. “You know, you don’t have to sit so stiffly, don’t you?”

Connor evaluated his posture, tilting his head at her in confusion. “I’m sorry.” He apologized. “How would you prefer me to sit?”

Software Instability ^ She laughed a little and rolled her eyes, taking the remote control and paused the episode. “Alright, first of all, you can kick your feet up and lean back against the armrest.” She suggested.

Connor then squinted at her in even further confusion. “But won’t I just be in your way?”

There was a smirk plastered on her face. “Don’t worry, I have an idea.” She assured him. “Just trust me.”

Complying with her instructions, Connor turned around, resting his head on the armrest closest to him and tentatively placing his legs in her lap, folding his hands in his. “Is this better?” He asked, unsure.

Software Instability ^ Rachel’s eyes landed on his hands before she started to quietly laugh, a fist to her mouth. “Do you need something to do with your hands?” She asked him.

Connor glanced at them, feeling a little awkward. “Why do you ask?”

Software Instability ^ She smirked and then pushed Connor’s left leg off her lap and placed it behind her and shifted to crawl up between them. Surprised by the suddenness of it, his eyes widened and his hands placed themselves beside his hips on the couch. 

But Rachel simply rested her head on his chest, snaking her arms around his back and holding him, draping her blanket over the both of them. “Put your hands on my back.”

Software Instability ^ Connor, curious, did as she told him and found himself sinking into this touch. He wasn’t made for companionship. He was made to integrate into teams and form partnerships in the workforce. But he wasn’t made for intimacy.

Software Instability ^ Which made Rachel’s active seeking it out from him that much more perplexing and yet...desirable. It was completely open and honest. It was true. And it was pure.

“Comfy?” Rachel asked, making a pleasant hum as she further settled herself in Connor’s arms.

He nodded. “Very.” He answered in earnest.

“Good.” She replied, pulling her left arm out from under him to reach for the remote again to unpause the episode.

For a while, they laid there completely comfortable in each other’s arms. The only sound that interrupted their silence was the occasional laugh or snicker from Rachel.

But as Connor continued watching the pilot, he began to notice something about the character Jake Peralta. Something that once again returned his attention back to Rachel. “This character reminds me a lot of you, Rachel.”

Connor felt her flinch slightly as she let out a quiet laugh. “You think so?” She asked weakly. “How does he?”

The android searched for the right words to say then. “He’s rather immature and childish, but good-natured and comical.” He started to explain. “But he’s also very capable and intelligent. And he cares deeply about those around him and their struggles.”

Software Instability ^ Rachel - Partner ^ Connor could feel her smile into his synthetic skin. “That’s something I also really like about the show, too.” She admitted. “A lot of cop shows have their male protagonist be the super cocky overconfident detective who never follows the rules and gets his fellow officers in danger. He also is a massive dick usually and doesn’t really give a shit about anyone but himself and yet, the lazy writing artificially places him in the right every single fucking time. But not here.

“And it even starts it off that way here, before it immediately cuts off.” She went on, getting more enthralled and passionate with every word. “And at first, then you think he’s just goofy and immature and doesn’t take his job seriously, but then he immediately shows that he already solved the case. And then a few scenes later, he’s winning a bet he’s made with Amy about how many cases they can solve. And everyone in the precinct values him a lot as a detective, even if they enjoy poking fun at him. And Jake cares a lot about his friends. It’s a really really great subversion and Jake himself is just a really good character. I mean, they’re all pretty great characters, but I really like Jake.”

Software Instability ^ Connor could barely focus on the show when she was speaking, but he didn’t mind. Somehow, she always managed to capture his full undivided attention, and he had no complaints.

They continued to watch in silence, the occasional snicker or quip from Rachel. But Connor was beginning to feel rather jittery and impatient. He always had an issue with sitting still. No matter what, he just felt the need to be doing something. He was an innately restless being. So, hesitantly, he started rubbing circles with his hands into the blanket over Rachel’s back. He hesitated for a moment out of making her uncomfortable, but a contented sigh told him that she was enjoying it.

“I like the sound of your thirium pump.” Rachel said quietly, nestling further into his chest. “It’s comforting.”

 Connor glanced down at her curiously. “How so?” He asked.

“It doesn’t sound much different from a human heartbeat.” She elaborated. “There’s a lot more mechanical stuff going on that I can hear. Whirs, clicks, creaks and all that. But I like it. It’s nice.”

Connor nodded, unconsciously smiling at her before returning his attention back to the show.

For a while, they laid there comfortably, the episodes moving on. The android admitted that he was enjoying himself. However, as his hands were continuously rubbing his companion’s backside, his left ended up trailing up to her hair subconsciously.

Software Instability ^ And with a small content moan, Rachel started making a rumbling sound he could feel in his chest that he realized resembled the purring of a housecat.

Tease

Say Nothing

Software Instability ^ Briefly considering teasing her, Connor instead decided against it. It was clearly an involuntary reaction out of pleasure and the android would be lying if he didn’t find it incredibly endearing and charming. And he also couldn’t help but enjoy the feeling of her hair in his hands. He didn’t realize just how soft and curled her locks were. It was as if they were made to perfectly coil around his thick synthetic fingers.

After a while, she had gone quiet. Once again, the service had shown a prompt that asked if she was still watching. He looked down at her and realized that she had fallen asleep. Checking the time and realizing that it was past midnight, Connor decided it was high time for her to be in bed.

He gently shook her awake. “Rachel?” He asked softly, cupping her face and getting her to look up at him.

Software Instability ^ “Mm?” She blinked her eyes up at him slowly, smiling at him drowsily. “What time is it?”

“It’s past midnight.” He answered her, noticing her leaning further into his palm. “We should head to bed.”

She then groaned, nestling into his chest stubbornly. “But...comfy.” She protested.

“I’m sorry, Rachel.” He apologized, wasting no time gently disentangling himself from her, much to her effort to stop him. “But your welfare is important and I feel it would be best if you slept in your bed.”

Software Instability ^ He then turned the television off and turned back to see Rachel rubbing her eyes, bundled up in the blanket. Looking up at him, she didn’t even speak. She simply extended her arms up at him and made the hand closing gesture with both of her hands.

The android didn’t have to ask for her to clarify. He knew what she wanted, and he quickly bundled her up and lifted her, cradling her as he carried her to her bedroom.

He was beginning to realize that this had sort of become routine, now.

Making his way into the bedroom once again, he gently laid Rachel on her side of the bed, even opting to remove her glasses and place them on her nightstand for her. He then went into the bathroom and grabbed the same robe he used for the past couple nights, removing his dress pants and socks once again before slipping the robe on.

He had slipped onto the sheets like he had previously done before Rachel’s voice cut through the silence of the house. “Um...actually, Connor?” She said, interrupting him. “Could...could you sleep under the sheets with me, this time?”

Connor hesitated for a moment, gazing down at her as her brown eyes pleaded with him. “Are you sure?” He asked, just to be certain. He didn’t want to overstep his boundaries.

“I mean...we were literally just snuggling on the couch downstairs while you were shirtless.” She pointed out, her voice raspy and gravelly with exhaustion as she flashed a smirk up at him. “I like the feeling of being pressed against you. It makes me feel safe.”

Software Instability ^ The android found it difficult to argue with her logic and he did as she asked of him, shuffling to free the sheets from underneath him and furled himself beneath them.

Software Instability ^ Instantly, Rachel wrapped herself around him, pressing herself into his chest and humming contentedly. And Connor did the same, cradling her into him and caging her protectively with his arms.

But as she was quickly settling into him, her observation on his thirium pump was present in his mind. He found it rather odd that humans found such comfort in such things.

However, he was also curious. He could monitor heart rates and take tests on humans, but he hadn’t actually ever listened to a heartbeat. He had no interest in doing so, prior. But Rachel’s observation made him want to for the sake of being able to understand the comparison. 

“Can I ask you to do something, Rachel?” He asked, softly.

She shuffled a bit, looking up at him. “Sure, what is it?” She asked him groggily.

“Can you let me listen to your heartbeat?” He asked. “You mentioned that the sound of a thirium pump is similar to a heartbeat and I was curious about how accurate that is.”

She snickered softly in the indigo depths of the room and shifted. “Sure, go ahead.” She agreed, shuffling upwards toward the headboard and lying on her back. “C’mere.”

Software Instability ^ Connor took Rachel’s hint and laid himself on top of her, placing his head against her chest and nestling himself under her chin, wrapping his arms around her back. Her heartbeat was above average, but he knew the reason why, and he knew it would settle back to normal in a moment.

Software Instability ^ And...she was right. Strangely enough, a human heartbeat was nearly identical to a thirium regulator’s pump. And there was indeed something comforting and pleasant about the sound of another’s heartbeat. But unlike his, hers was more organic and deep. There were other sounds accompanying the sound of her heartbeat. Sounds of growls and echoes that were the sounds of the several organs inside working as they were meant to.

Software Instability ^ As far as he could hear, Rachel was a picture of health. And that brought him a sense of security in her arms. “Hey, Connor?” She asked, letting out a calm breath.

“Yes, Rachel?” Connor replied.

She seemed to hesitate for a moment. “You don’t, uh...you don’t mind having your hair touched, do you?”

Connor regarded her question for a brief moment. “I’ve never been asked that before.”

“May I?” She asked meekly.

The android didn’t see any issue, considering that that’s what he’d been doing to her earlier. “You may.”

Software Instability ^ Gently, her small, delicate, and nimble fingers began threading through his synthetic locks. And immediately, the android understood her pleasurable reaction earlier to his ministrations.

While androids couldn’t feel pain, they still had receptors and could feel physical sensations. Of which included that of pleasure. And Connor felt like his synthetic skin was prickling, but it wasn’t unpleasant. It was strangely soothing and he could even sense his software threatening to go into stasis without his input.

Now he understood what it actually felt like to fall asleep for humans, and he certainly now understood how easy it was for Rachel to doze off in his arms earlier.

Software Instability ^ Reluctantly, he set a time for his stasis to be interrupted and let himself slip into it, for once feeling completely at peace and blissful.

---------------------------------

Next Chapter

[waywardaardvark79]

No Strings Attached Part 14: Here They Come

Summary: Your roommates old friend moves to town and the two of you quickly strike up a no strings attached relationship. How long will the two of you be able to hold up what was supposed to be a simple, uncomplicated arrangement?

Pairing: Dean x Reader

Warnings: language, child birth (non graphic)

A/N: Updates should be every few days. No set schedule. 

"Y/N!" you heard Dean call out as he walked into the door.

"Back...here." you panted out, what you confused for Braxton Hick's contractions earlier hitting you and proving that it was in fact the real deal.

You kept trying to take slow, deep breaths. That's what you were supposed to do right? Focus on your breathing. You shook your head, internally cursing yourself for never taking one of those stupid Lamaze classes, thinking it was pointless at the time because you already knew how to breathe. A loud thud from the hall pulled you from your thoughts.

"Fuck, did you spill something in the hall?" Dean called out.

"You...you could say that!" you yelled back.

"You coulda gave me a little warning." he said as he walked into the room, his jeans wet from slipping.

"Oh, I'm sorry. I've just been a little busy trying not to have your babies in our bedroom." you gritted out, another contraction nearly taking your breath away.

Dean stopped dead in his tracks, "Babies?" he choked out, his eyes wide with panic.

"Oh, no, no, no, Freckles. You don't get to panic right now. You are supposed to be the calm one." you said, as you tried to sit up.

"Ok...I'm calm. I'm calm....calm." he kept repeating to himself as he started to rush around the room searching for something.

"What are you doing?" you asked, still working on trying to sit up.

"Looking for the go bag." he said, frantically searching the closet for the bag you were supposed to pack.

"Yeah, it's not in there." you sheepishly said, knowing that he wouldn't find it in the closet, actually he would never find it at all because it didn't exist.

"Where is it then?" he cried out, his eyes wild.

"Yeah, you aren't gonna find it. I may have forgotten to pack it." you said, finally in an upright position.

"You forgot?! Y/N, that's one of the most important parts. Everyone says you have to have one." he said as he started grabbing basically everything in front of him and shoving it in a bag.

"See, I kind of thought the most important part was pushing out the babies, but guess I was wrong. You know I'm not so great at remembering to do things, or did you forget that me forgetting my stupid shot is what got us here in the first place? You should have left me a note." you argued.

Dean stopped packing long enough to turn and face you, his hand coming up to point at the lamp on your nightstand, "I did." he said before turning to resume his packing.

You turned your head to see a yellow Post-it note stuck to the lamp shade, pack a bag written on it in Dean's writing.

"Oops." you said with a shrug of your shoulders. "Guess I missed that." Another contraction hit and you sucked in a breath. "Freckles, I know you're freaking out about the bag right now, but I got two babies trying to come out of me and I don't think I can hold them in, so unless you want to deliver them like we are in some episode of Little House on the Prairie I suggest you forget the fuckin' bag and get me to a hospital." you said, trying your best to remain calm.

Dean kicked the bag aside and rushed to the bed. He pulled you to your feet and started to walk you towards the door.

"Careful, that stuff is slippery." he said, as you passed the spot where you water broke.

You looked over at him. He was probably internally screaming, but trying his best to put on a brave face. His jeans were still wet from his fall, and his grip on you was so tight that you feared he was going to start crushing bones soon. You couldn't help the laughter that burst from you.

Dean turned to you, "What?" he asked, panic on his face, confused about why you were laughing.

"We, me and you, are about to be parents." you laughed out, the idea suddenly the funniest thing in the world to you.

Dean chuckled nervously as he opened the door for you, "And why is that so funny?" he asked, expecting you to be in full on panic mode instead.

"These poor kids don't have a chance." you said as Dean led you down the hallway of your apartment building.

"I think they're gonna be just fine." he said, trying to reassure you.

"I forgot to pack the bag, one of my first mom jobs and I screwed up." you said, grabbing onto his arm and making him stop walking as another contraction hit. "Fuck, I'm gonna be the mom that leaves the kids behind at the grocery store on accident and doesn't realize it until I get home." you panted, the contractions becoming more painful.

"Nah, I'll just pin a don't forget the kid note to your shirt before you go." Dean teased, trying to lighten the mood.

You scoffed, "Yeah, I think we seen how well that worked." you said, referring to the bag. "Fuck, I forgot about the stairs." you whined as  you looked down at the flight of stairs below you.

"Come on, I'll carry you." Dean said, as he attempted to pick you up.

You swatted him away, "We don't need you in the hospital too. You can't even get your arms around me." you said, as you walked down the first step.

The two of you finally made it to the lobby, both soaked with sweat.

You looked around, "I think I'm just gonna have them here." you panted out, completely exhausted.

"You wait right here, and I'll go get the car." Dean said before rushing to the door. "Just keep em' in there, squeeze your legs together or something." he offered as advice before running out the door.

"Squeeze your legs together." you repeated, shaking your head as you waddled towards the door.

Dean pulled up as close as he could a few moments later, and jumped out of the car to help you inside.

"Still in there?" he nervously asked, just trying to keep you talking to distract you from the pain.

"No, I actually had them in the lobby. I left them with the building manager. I thought we could go out and celebrate." you sarcastically said, your grip on him tightening.

"See, now I know you're ok. You are still fluent in sarcasm." Dean pointed out as he opened the car door for you.

"I'm pretty sure that I would be sarcastic on my death bed, so I wouldn't judge anything by that." you said as Dean helped you ease yourself into the seat.

Dean closed your door and sprinted around the front of the car, quickly opening his door and jumping inside.

"Ready?" he asked as he started the car.

"I don't think I really have a choice." you said, your arms coming up to wrap around  your stomach. "Oh, fuck." you rasped out, another contraction ripping through you. "Yeah, I don't have a choice, floor it, Freckles."

Dean looked over at you, "Hold on." he said as he gunned it out of the parking lot.

The hospital was about 25 minutes away.  Dean had called ahead to let them know that you were coming and was currently speeding down the highway, pushing the car to it's limits.

"You're gonna get pulled over, slow down." you warned, knowing that cops liked to hide out behind the row of trees that were up ahead. "Seriously Freckles, slow down. They like to sit up there. It's a speed trap." you said, another contraction causing you to groan.

Dean pushed down on the accelerator, increasing his speed, and ignoring your warning. "Shit." he said under his breath a few moments later.

You looked into the rearview mirror, red and blue flashing lights staring back at you, "Told you." you said, as Dean slowed the car and pulled to the side of the road.

The two of you sat in the car, anxiously awaiting the arrival of the police officer at the window. Dean was impatiently drumming his fingers on the wheel as he glanced over at you. He reached for the door handle, but you grabbed his arm, stopping him.

"What the hell are you doin'?" you ask, tightening your hold on his arm so he couldn't get out.

"I'm gonna go tell him to hurry up." he said, trying to pull away from you.

"Stay in the car before you get shot." you said.

Before Dean could reply there was a knock on his window. Dean turned in his seat and rolled the window down.

"You know how fast you were goin' back there, boy?" the heavy set officer asked as he leaned down to look into the car.

"Listen, Officer, I can explain." Dean started to say, a loud groan from you cutting him off.

The officer leaned down further to get a better look at you, "Ma'am, is everything alright? You seem to be in some sort of distress." he said.

You rolled your eyes, "Wow, you must be the brightest one on the force." you said, Dean snapping his head in your direction to give you a warning glare. "No, Officer, everything is not ok. I've got two babies trying to work their way out of me right now while we are sitting here having this pointless conversation!" you yelled, not caring that you were yelling at an authority figure.

"You're in labor?" he asked, staring over at you.

"That's some top notch police work. What gave it away? Was it my giant pregnant belly, or the fact that I literally just told you a few seconds ago that there were two babies trying to come out of me?" you asked.

Dean glared at you, "You want the kids' born in a jail cell?" he whispered, urging you to get your attitude in check.

You sighed, "Look Sir, I'm really sorry." you gritted out, not seeing any reason to apologize to him. He was the one asking stupid questions. "Hormones." you added with a shrug of your shoulders, hoping that it would be a suitable explanation.

"That's...I understand, Ma'am." he said to you, almost making you feel a sliver of guilt for being such as ass. "Son, give me just a minute, and I'll escort you to the hospital." he said to Dean, tapping the door a couple of times before walking off.

Dean slowly exhaled the breath he had been holding and turned to look at you, "I know. I know. I shouldn't have said that shit, but I really can't be blamed for what comes out of my mouth right now." you defended, knowing that Dean was probably about to scold you for how you talked to the police officer.

"Yeah, you're probably right, but I was gonna say this is gonna be fuckin' awesome." he said, a wide smile on his face as he revved the engine, taking off quickly once the officer passed by.

You chuckled, "Again, we are about to be parents." you said, shaking your head.

Dean glanced over at you, a goofy smile on his face, "What? This is awesome. Come on, a police escort." he said, flying down the highway.

You shook your head at him, the smile on your face mirroring his at the fact that he was so excited right now, "I know, Freckles." 

Dean was pulling up in front of the hospital in no time, thanks to the police escort. He cut the engine, hopped out of the car, and quickly ran around to your side to open the door for you.

"Go tell them we're here." you said as you turned in your seat, your feet coming to rest on the pavement below you.

Dean took off towards the entrance and returned a few moments later with a nurse and a wheelchair.

"Are  you ready to have these babies, Mrs. Winchester?" she asked, a kind smile on her face.

"As I'll ever be." you replied, not correcting her about the name.

"Okie dokie, let's get you in the chair, and then we'll go inside and get you all set up, Dear." she explained as she helped you from the car into the wheelchair. "Dad, you go on and park the car and then check in with reception. They'll tell you where she is." she said to Dean before quickly pushing you inside. 

Dean walked into the room they had you in just as the nurse was attaching an external monitor to keep a check on the babies' heart rate.

"Ok, the doctor should be in to check you in a few minutes." she said to you before clipping a call light to your sheet. "If you need anything just press this button, and someone will be in as soon as they can."

"Thank you." you said, adjusting the pillow under your head as she walked out of the room. "So, how long do you think we have?" you asked Dean.

He pulled up a chair next to your bed, "No clue, Sweetheart." he said, looking at all of the monitors you were attached to.

"I mean, it can't take that long. I've been having these stupid contractions for hours, and we got the water breaking thing out of the way." you said, anxiously drumming your fingers on your stomach.

Dean shrugged his shoulders, "I called everybody while I was parking the car, my parents, Charlie, Bobby, and Ellen." he said, trying to change the subject and get your mind on something else.

"They comin'?" you asked, your hand coming up to grip the bed rail as a contraction hit.

Dean nodded, "Yeah, they told me to call them back when they get here. Mom said to call her when you were at a 10 so they could get on the road." he said.

"A 10? I bet I'm almost there. I've got to be." you breathed out, the contraction subsiding. "The doctor is gonna come in here, give me the drugs, and then we are gonna get this show on the road."

"How are we doing today, guys?" the doctor asked, right on cue.

"Ready for you to give me the drugs." you blurted out.

She chuckled, "Let's just see how far along you are first, and then we can decide if you are ready for an epidural." she said, a smile on her face as she grabbed a set of gloves. "Ok, this may be a little uncomfortable." she said, as she lifted the blanket and prepared to see how dilated you were.

You sucked in a quick breath when you felt her fingers, "Uncomfortable is an understatement." you clipped out, your hand reaching out for Dean.

She pulled her hand from you and fixed the blanket back over you, "Good news. You're at two centimeters and you're about 50% effaced." she said as she pulled off her gloves and tossed them in the trash.

"A two....I'm only at a two?" you asked, disappointment in your voice. "So, no drugs?"

The doctor smiled at you, "We usually wait to give the epidural until you are about five centimeters dilated." she said.

"Ok, so just three more centimeters and I'm set." you said, telling yourself that you would be there in no time.

                                               Four Hours Later

            Dean was doing everything in his power to keep you comfortable and distracted. He had forgotten how many stories he told you, ranging from things about his childhood to memories of the two of you. He was pretty sure he could be considered the MVP of ice chip feeding, and was adamant about keeping the cloth on your forehead cool. However, all of his attempts seemed to be in vain, you were miserable no matter what he did.

You clutched the front of Dean's t-shirt and pulled him to you, "Go get someone. It's got to be time for drugs." you gritted out, your jaw clenched.

Dean brought his hand up and began to stroke your hair, "Ok, Sweetheart. I'll be right back." he said, quickly catching on to the fact that whatever you wanted right now you were going to get. 

Dean walked back into the room about ten minutes later with the doctor in tow.

"Come on, doc. I know it's time for the drugs." you said, praying that you were right.

"Ok, let's see how far you've come." she said, slipping on a pair of gloves.

Dean made his way to your side, and grabbed your hand, bracing himself for the bone crushing squeeze that was coming.

"Well, you've made progress." the doctor said, as she lowered the blanket.

You let out a relieved breath, "Thank God. What am I? A six, a seven?" you asked.

"You're at about four centimeters." she said, crushing your hopes.

"Four." you choked out, not believing that you heard her right.

She turned her attention from the monitors to look at you, "I know this isn't going as fast as you hoped it would, but your contractions are starting to increase and are coming closer together. That's a good sign." she said, hoping that news would cheer you up.

"Yeah, I know they are. I can FEEL THEM!" you yelled.

"I'll be back in to check on you soon." the doctor said before walking out of the room.

You sighed and threw your head back against the pillow, "Just knock me out." you pleaded before turning to face Dean. "You know what, why don't you just go out there and see if you can find the drugs yourself? I mean, they probably have it in one of those little carts or something, break into a room if you have to." you begged.

For a moment Dean honestly considered your request. He hated to see you like this, but quickly shook the insanity from his head, "Just hang in there. You are doing so good." he praised, grabbing the cloth from your head to cool it. 

                                                 Three Hours Later

"What happened to I'll be back to check on you soon?" you spit out when the doctor walked into the room. "You know, his brother is a lawyer." you said, pointing to Dean. "I will sue everyone in this fuckin' hospital if I don't get some drugs right now." you threatened before turning to Dean. "Get Sam on the phone and tell him to start making a case." you said, completely serious.

"Let's hold off on the lawsuit until I see where we are." the doctor said as she prepared to check you.

You closed your eyes gripping onto Dean's hand as you prepared yourself for the news that you actually hadn't progressed at all. In fact, you wouldn't be surprised if she told you that you had actually went backwards and were now at a two.

"Seven centimeters." the doctor said with a smile.

"Seven...seven!" you yelled out, your other hand coming up to excitedly pat Dean's arm. "That is bigger than five. You owe me some drugs." you said to the doctor, excitement heavy in your voice.

"Someone will be right in to give you an epidural." she said, tossing her gloves in the trash.

"And when you say right in..." you trailed off.

"I will call them as soon as I walk out of here." she said, reassuring you that it wouldn't be long.

"Thank God." you breathed out.

"See, Sweetheart, everything is gonna be fine now." Dean said, silently thanking God that you were far enough along for an epidural. He didn't know how much longer he could watch you lay there in misery.

You nodded your head, "Keep Sam on speed dial just incase." you said, still completely serious about your lawsuit. 

                                                     Five Hours Later

You had been in the hospital for twelve hours. The epidural you had gotten had allowed you to catch a few hours of sleep, and Dean had  followed your lead and dozed off in the chair next to your bed. The doctor coming into the room woke the two of you.

"Twelve hours." she said as she slipped on her gloves to check you. "Let's see if these babies are ready to come out."

"I don't think they want to come out." you said as she lifted your blanket and started to check you.

"Ten centimeters." she sang out in a cheery voice. "Ok, we are going to get you moved to an operating room real quick, and then we'll be ready to start." she said, quickly pulling off her gloves.

"Operating room?" Dean nervously asked.

"Don't worry. It's hospital protocol to deliver multiples in an operating room." she explained, a reassuring smile on her face as she started to walk out the door. "They will be in to get you in a few minutes."

Dean took a deep breath, suddenly on edge that this was really about to happen, "Here we go." he breathed out, trying to sound as calm as possible for your sake.

You nodded your head, your heart racing in your chest, "You know, I know I've been complaining about getting this show on the road the whole time we've been here, but I don't think I'm ready. No, I know I'm not ready. I can't do this. I...I...." you trailed off, panic evident in your voice.

Dean grabbed your hand, "I know you can do it. You're gonna do great." he said, his other hand stroking your hair.

"No, I don't think so. I mean, I have no idea what to do. You know those books your mom gave me that tells you everything to expect? Never read them. They have been collecting dust on my nightstand. I can't have these babies without having read those stupid books. Ok, ok...you go home and grab the books. I'll keep these guys inside until I skim over them." you rambled out, your eyes wide with panic.

Dean chuckled, "Sweetheart, I'm pretty sure we don't have time for that." he said as he continued to stroke your hair, trying to calm you down.

"I'll make time." you said, your mind racing with ideas to hold off your labor.

Dean leaned down and kissed your forehead, "You are going to do great, and I'm going to be right there with you." he said just as a few nurses walked into the room.

"Are we ready?" one of them asked.

You looked up at Dean, "You're gonna be right there?" you asked, your hand squeezing onto his.

"I promise." he said, squeezing your hand back.

You took a few deep breaths before looking up at the nurse. "Ready." 

The nurses wheeled you into the operating room, Dean quickly stepping to your side while they got everything set up.

"Quite a crowd." he said, looking at all of the nurses standing back awaiting the twin's arrival.

You nodded, "Yep." you said, popping the p. "We don't even know what they are." you said turning your attention from the crowd to Dean.

"You said you wanted it to be a surprise." he said, looking down at you.

"I know, but we don't even have any names picked out." you said, worry in your voice.

"I'm sure it'll come to us when we see them." he said, trying to ease your mind.

The doctor cleared her throat, "Let's get started." she said as she motioned for a nurse to come to your bedside. "She's going to help hold your leg up for you. Dad, go ahead and grab that one." she said, the nurse soon pulling up your leg into position. Dean mimicked her action, the crook of his elbow coming up to hook under the back of your knee.

You grabbed onto the front of his shirt, "You make sure you stay up here. I don't want you scarred by what you see down there." you said.

Dean smiled down at you, "Got it. I'll stay up here." he said.

"Ok, Y/N, I'm going to need you to give me a push when I tell you." the doctor said from her place between your legs.

You didn't even have time to reply  before she was telling you to push. 

                                            30 Minutes Later

"Big push." the doctor said, Dean and the nurse holding your legs in place as you pushed as hard as you could.

Your head collapsed back against the pillow, your brow covered in sweat. "I...I can't." you panted out, completely exhausted.

"You're almost there, Sweetheart. You're doing so good." Dean praised.

"Jesus Christ, just yank them out already." you gritted out, before pushing again.

"We've got a head!" the doctor yelled, Dean trying his best to lean down and see.

"Dean!!!" you barked out, reaching to pull him back to your side.

"Ok, one more big push should do it." the doctor said, as she prepared to help ease the baby out.

You sucked in a deep breath, and pushed with everything you had, relief hitting you the minute you felt the baby pulled from your body.

"It's a boy!" she yelled out, the baby's cry soon filling the room.

"A boy." Dean breathed out, his focus on the baby that was now being passed over to a group of nurses.

"Is...is he ok?" you asked, desperately trying to crane your neck to catch a glimpse of him.

"Everything looks good!" one of the nurses called out, setting your mind at ease.

"Ok, Y/N, we still have one more to go." the doctor reminded you, needing you to focus. "Go ahead and give me a push."

Dean's attention was back on you as you grunted out a big push. "I'm so tired." you breathed out, not sure how much longer you were going to be able to keep going. "I've already had one baby. Let me rest." you pleaded.

"Come on, I can see the head." the doctor said, trying to encourage you.

Five minutes and a few big pushes later you felt your second baby being pulled from you, cries ringing out through the room not long after.

"We've got a girl!" the doctor yelled out as you collapsed back against the bed.

Dean looked at you, a wide smile on his face. "A girl. We got one of each." he excitedly said before turning his attention to his daughter.

"Go." you said, nodding in the direction of the babies. "Hard part's over."

Dean was hesitant to leave your side, but a gentle shove from you sent him on his way.

"I get to rest now, right?" you asked the doctor.

She smiled at you, "The hard part is over. You’ve earned it." she said. 

                                                Recovery Room

You were propped up in bed, your eyes focused on the door as you waited for Dean to walk in with the twins. You grabbed the call light, worried that he hadn't got there yet and were about to push it when he finally walked through the door, a baby in each arm and a nurse trailing after him pushing two little carts.

You scooted over in bed, making room for him to sit down. "Gimme." you said, as soon as he was seated, anxious to get to hold them.

You took the baby that was closest to you, your son, and held him in your arms. You didn't say anything right away, just took the time to really study the tiny human that you were holding.

"We did good, Freckles." you said, tears in your eyes.

"It was all you." he said, his own focus on his sleeping daughter.

You looked over at them, marveling at how tiny she looked in his arms, "They're perfect." you whispered, Dean nodding his head in agreement.

The two of you sat there in silence, each busy going over every detail of the new babies in your arms.

Dean cleared his throat, breaking the silence, "Any idea on what we should use for names?" he asked.

"I was thinking about maybe something after our parents. Well, your parents and then maybe Bobby and Ellen for me." you said, your finger tracing down the bridge of your son's nose.

Dean cocked his head to the side in thought, "Bobby John?"

You chuckled, "How about Robert John. We could call him Bobby for short." you suggested.

"Robert John Winchester. I like it." he said, a proud smile on his face. "What about this little princess?" he asked, smiling down at your daughter.

"I kind of like Olivia. I think Ollie would be a cute nickname." you said, your brow furrowed in thought as you tried to think of some more options.

"Olivia...Olivia Mary-Ellen Winchester." Dean finished for you.

"I love it." you said, his face lightening up at your approval.

"You know, we got a waiting room full of people that want to meet these two, but if you're not ready I'll tell them to come back." he said, finally looking over at you.

"Go get em'." you said, shifting your son over to one arm and holding open the other for Dean to place your daughter in.

He placed her in your waiting arm, and stood from the bed, pausing at the doorway to look over at the three of you.

"Go. We'll be fine." you said, knowing that he was reluctant to leave. 

A few minutes later the door to your room opened, Dean walked through first, followed by Mary, John, Sam, Bobby, Ellen, and Charlie. Everyone crowded around you, all of them anxious to get a glimpse of the twins.

Dean stepped to your side, and eased your son from you, "Everybody meet Robert John Winchester." he said, as he placed the baby in his mother's arms, John and Bobby tearing up a little at his name.

Everyone was crowded around Mary trying to get a good look when you handed Dean your daughter, "And this is Olivia Mary-Ellen Winchester." he said as he handed your daughter to Ellen.

Bobby walked to your side and leaned down to kiss the top of your head, "You did real good, kid." he said, a proud smile on his face.

You smiled up at him, "I think so too."

"Have you ever seen anything so perfect?" Mary asked, standing next to Ellen so that she could see her granddaughter.

Ellen shook her head, "I'm real proud of ya, honey." she said, looking over at you with tears in her eyes. "Ash wanted me to tell you that he would be in tomorrow when you were feeling a little better."

"So, when are you going to get started on the next one so I can have one named after me?" Sam teased. 

“Yeah, that’s what I want to know too.” Charlie said.

"N-next one?" Dean croaked out.

You chuckled, "At least let us get out of here first." you teased back, Sam and Charlie laughing at your response.

John walked over to Dean and clapped him on the back, "You two did good." he said before pulling Dean into a hug.

Mary looked over at you, noticing just how exhausted you looked, "Why don't we  stop by your place and make sure everything is set up for when you guys get to come home?" she suggested, knowing that you needed to rest.

"Oh, you don't have to do that." you said, not wanting to cause them any problems.

"I know we don't have to, but we want to." Ellen said, as she passed your daughter back to Dean.

Everyone said their goodbyes, and told you how proud they were of you before leaving your room, leaving just you, Dean, and the babies alone.

You let out a loud yawn, your free hand coming up to cover your mouth.

"How about I take them down to the nursery so you can get some sleep?" Dean suggested, as he placed your daughter down in one of the little carts the nurse had brought in earlier.

"Take them? Like out of the room?" you nervously asked, not wanting to let them out of your sight.

Dean chuckled, "It's ok, Sweetheart. Mom and Ellen both said we should get the sleep while we can, and they'll have a nurse with them. If you really don't like it I can go get them back anytime." he said, trying to get you to change your mind and get some much needed rest.

You thought for a moment, looking back and forth between your children, "You'll go get them if I don't like it?" you asked.

"I promise." he said, as he took your sleeping son from your arms and placed him in the cart. "I'll be right back." he said, as he started to slowly push them from the room. 

When Dean walked back into the room you were laying on your side facing away from the door. He quietly made his way to the chair by your bed and sat down, shifting around until he found a comfortable position.

"Get up here with me." you mumbled, the squeaking chair giving away his presence.

"You don't have to share the bed with me. I know how you must feel. I'll be fine in the chair." he said.

You chuckled, "I feel like someone set off a stick of dynamite under my ass, but I want you up here." you said as you scooted over a little more.

You felt the bed dip as Dean climbed in next to you, his arm gently coming to rest over your side. You snuggled back into him as he fixed the blankets over the two of you.

"I hope you know how much I love you." he said.

You grabbed his hand and brought it up to your lips and placed a gentle kiss to his knuckles, "I do, and I hope you know that we love you even more, Freckles."

Tags: @vicmc624 @flamencodiva @divadinag @deans-baby-momma @heyyouwiththeassbutt @baby-bunker-pie @sunsetsandbooks​ @michellethetvaddict 

A/N: So, just a heads up,  this series has one part left. I have about seven other ones in my drafts, and I'll post a teaser later of what is coming next if anyone is interested. 

[fimawari]

How to hopefully not get arrested and staying safe:

Ok, all this info jargin I'm about to dump on you comes from both research and personal experience (I'm a firefighter/medic, sometimes we work close with police - and then sometimes they're kicking out asses at softball, but enough of that). But this is a long ass guide on how to hopefully not get arrested.

1. Film: Now this one's kinda obvious but film fuckin everything for evidence. But also, make the officer aware that you are recording them to avoid other legal bullshit even though it's suppose to be legal to film in public - just tell em that your filming for your own safety. They will also know then they are being watched on their actions. Even better, travel in pairs if you can, another eye witness.

2. Be polite: Now look, I get it - you don't like em, you hate em, you want to boil their guts etc etc. But this ain't the time. Getting even slightly rude can be classified as some bullshit like "resisting" or "harassing" an officer, and you'll get a bigger ticket, fine, get your shit towed, or congrats, arrested.

3. Know your rights: Amendment 4 protects you from illegal search and seizure. This applies more to being pulled over or they're coming to your house. If they ask if they can search your vehicle, say "are you asking me or are you telling me?" If they are asking, you can refuse, but if they're ordering you - just get out of the car, even if it seems unnecessary, so they can't chalk that up to a resistance and try to escalate the situation.

God forbid, If you think a cop has framed you - calm down. I know you have every damn right to be raging and belligerent, but don't make it worse, that's what they want you to do. Wait until you see the judge and a lawyer, then go off. Any evidence you can use, use it.

4. Don't give anymore info then what's required:

I'm a blabber mouth, I like to chat it up with anyone - but I'm telling you, zip it. Don't give them any more information that isn't necessary. Unless you do know the person, you don't know the cop. They could legitmentally be trying to chat it up with you, but many are trained to do so. Some might be trying even to provoke you, use things against you. Save it for everywhere else, but if it's just you and a cop alone, this ain't the time to die stupid.

The sad and complicated thing behind the issue is that their is indeed a human behind the cop. They're aren't a robot programmed with one thing. They have free will, like any other person does. They could be nice and decent, or they could be a deranged psychotic lunatic who got past the checks and now look they're in a dangerous position of power **cough cough** Chauvin **cough cough**. And another scary thing with humans - they make mistakes, they can get scared, anxious, upset, nervous. This is dangerous. Scaring someone with a gun strapped to their side, never a good idea. Because they are human it's impossible half the time to know what they are thinking and so you must always precede with caution. We as humans will roughly meet about 20,000 people in person in our entire life time. There are over 680,000 active in the police force. I've met cops who give fucking teddy bears and shit to kids and don't load their guns because they'd rather die then shoot anyone, and I've met douchebags who seemed to hate their job, acted horribly irresponsible, and just a shitty attitude. I've met a cop who saved me from a suicide attempt and stayed with me the whole ambulance ride, and I've met one that laughed and berated me for trying to save a friend. I've met one that fixed people's plumbing and heating for free in their spare time, and then there was the one that arrested my driver for parking the firetruck "to close to the hydrant" THAT'S WHERE WERE SUPPOSED TO BE. I've met the older country cop who just wants to talk about fishing all day, and I've met several rookies, fresh out of camp, who are freaking the fuck out because this is all new shit to them and "what do you mean I can't park the cruiser on the front lawn?" And finally, I've watched one man, who got punched in the face repeatedly by a suspect, but still refused to injure them, and talked them down instead of using force. Kudos to you dude if you're still alive.

You never know what the hell you're going to get. Prepare for the worst. Prepare for the deranged psychopath and act accordingly.

5. Some tips for the protesting right now:

Stay safe. Don't engage whatsoever with a cop, don't do illegal shit (and if you do don't get caught) Stick to the center of the herd for protection.

In the event things go south, the herd is now you're enemy essentially. When a crowd of people stampede, they act like one giant entity. Get to the side lines, and slowly try to make your away against the flow to escape a trample. You can do this by inching sideways down a wall.

There are a million guides to gear and stuff to wear, as well as what to bring and what to avoid, so I won't go into it too much, but I can't stress enough about bringing food and water and a first aid kit. You will drop blood sugar so fast sweating in a crowd, you won't see it coming. If you have severe medical problems - this should be a given - don't go, it atleast don't go unprepared.

Also, the police aren't your only enemy in a rioting crowd. There are pickpockets lurking too to take advantage of the chaos. Everyone's got their own reason for being there, and it may not match your own. Can't say how many times I've been groped in a crowd. Carry pepper spray.

6. Learn yee some codes: codes can vary even by county - learn the appropriate ones for your location, so you can actually understand what the hell they're talking about. Also, so you know you are actually in a police scanner and not something else. We've had a few people protest over radios at the police, and we have to tell them along the lines of "Um sir, this is a walky-talky channel for a bunch of junior Firefighter's" or "Mam this is a direct channel to *hospital name*, not a police scanner."

Don't be that one guy that interupts an EMS call to someone dying somewhere. You can get charged with so many things, even upwards of involuntary manslaughter if you prevent a patient from getting treatment. Shit happens.

7. Detainment isn't being arrested: this is just a general one, but if they say you're being "detained" and put you in cuffs, don't put up a fight. They aren't arresting you dummy they're just making sure you don't run off or try to shank em.

[yxcnghq-blog]

good fuckin yard my guys gals and non binary pals !! i’m admin c and this is my messy disaster gay problem child jooseok. below the cut you’re gonna find out a loT about his tragic ass and if you hit the like button if i haven’t already, i’ll hit you up for plotting !! i’ll give a few ideas of connections on the end of this too since i’m gonna update and redo his plot page sfngn bUT let it be known i also mun aurora, euchan and emrys so i may have also messaged you for plotting on one of those acc’s, if so don’t worry i will ensure to give you the chance to plot with all my babies !! without further ado: 

jooseok is the son of a mob family, they’re very well established in the criminal world. his parents are yeong dami and yeong joohyuk. however it is dami who actually runs the game and is the head bitch in charge shall we say, not to bring feminist agenda joo to life but as u can imagine due to this he has hella respect for women esp his mother bc of the strength he observed in her growing up. he thinks women are stronger and better at survival bc of learning through his ma and being trained by her. 

so he was raised of course in the family gang, raised in crime and never really knew any other way to live. when he reached seventeen he was initiated officially into the gang meaning his role became more full time and his responsibility became larger. he dropped out of college after his first two years there to accomodate for this and so his education wasn’t the finest but he was homeschooled for a long time before he got too old as the gang considered it and he no longer had time for it. plus he was of the belief he knew enough about how the world worked through the observation of the good and ugly alone. 

he does have a younger sister who he considers his entire world and he also has a brother of around the same age as him. the family dynamic is a little complex, he’d kill without hesitation for both his siblings despite the fact that his brother and himself often don’t agree or see eye to eye on anything, they bicker and give each other shit but they’d never turn their backs on each other. these are wanted connections i will eventually put on the list so they can be filled out also. 

he’s considered an infiltrator and a double agent as his main job titles for the gang so right now he works undercover in the police force helping the wrongly accused escape a life of jail time and prove their innocence when the justice system fails them. occasionally he’s put in charge of strategy too and he is very very respected within the gang for being the youngest and yet the most skilled who rose to his tasks very quickly for his age and became the best at what he does at an alarmingly quick rate, he’s actually pretty well known for having the reputation of being the youngest to climb the ranks and gain status like this. 

he could actually have been the boss of the gang with the amount of tasks and dirty work he takes on

HOWEVER...

jooseok has a huge secret and this is that recently he’s started attending college again and taken on night classes to study law and learn more about the police force so he can become a genuine crime detective. he is also undertaking training for the police force. 

the lifestyle and career of the police force has always been his dream and his goal but with his limited education it was never something he could achieve alongside his gang life. this is why he jumped at the chance to at least do something undercover with the police and despite playing dirty cop, use it to do something good, vigilante like if you will. 

joo can’t keep his secret forever though, his gang are getting wind of what’s going on and soon he’s going to have to go into hiding. despite the gang being his family, hits will be issued on him until he is eliminated and killed. simply put he is considered a traitor the minute he gives up gang life, and he knows far too much to simply be allowed to walk free possibly giving away all their secrets and intel. because it is a family business there are severe consequences for him turning away from what is considered his duty and responsibility.

joo = big be gay, do crime type energy. he’s abrasive and amoral but he’s also nurturing and naturally smart and talented at everything he puts his passion into. he’s resourceful and crazy adaptable and he’s equal parts a protector as much as he is a fighter. he can be broody and blunt but he can also be witty and hilarious with his dark sense of humor and somewhat messed up mind and moral code. if you’re considered close to jooseok then he’ll kill half the population of daegu easy with his own hands with no worries so long as you’re safe. 

he worked undercover in america for a year so he can speak english and went by the shortened name of jo over there but most people call him seok or ong in korea to shorten his name to a nickname. he’s fluent in his english, jooseok is well known for being a quick learner in every area if u know what i mean *side eyes*

can be a bit of a fuckboy but has a big heart deep down despite it all, just keeps it concealed because of past toxic relationships and the belief taught into him from early on that any attachment to anything you don’t owe it to, would only result in weakness and vulnerability. and you don’t want people to know you have weaknesses when you do what jooseok does. *coughs* for this reason he has had a lot of pining and unrequited love situations *coughs* 

he’s not that close with his parents, he keeps a strictly professional relationship with them mostly but his mum is his idol for her mentality and attitude to life. though he wishes he could achieve more than what she allowed for him to be a part of. wishes he could be normal. 

OTHER LIL HEADCANONS: 

joo joined the gang officially at seventeen when the initiation process took place and this was the time he met hyunjin ( @phyunjinn​ ) also known as his best friend and right hand man. they quickly became partners in the gang for everything, if joo had business to deal with especially the dangerous kind then nate would be by his side, acting as his protection for anyone who dared cross him and likewise he would give the same back. think kinda like alec and jace i guess as a good example with the whole parabatai bond aspect. they fight the best when they’re fighting together, and if one of them died, a huge piece of the other would die with them. 

at first joo actually refused to talk to nate cause he’s a lil shit and he didn’t get why it should be important but dami urged her son, pointing out they were of similar ages and being initiated at the same time and it was important to have someone he could talk to and rely on like that. so he sidled his way over eventually and pretty easily and nonplussed like made a best friend out of the other male. they grew to have a secret code of trust between them, joo learning sign language for the male to put him at ease and also ordering the rest of the gang did the same despite complaints he quickly shut that shit down arguing they needed to be able to communicate with nate in his way to ensure his safety faster if need ever be. ( but for him personally, he learnt because he wanted to be able to talk to nate in the way that comes most naturally to the male ) 

in college he’s considered a soft jock type, heart of gold but he’s very physically attractive and a bit of a heart throb and definitely considered sporty despite also being very musically driven. 

PLOT IDEAS: 

joo needs some college friends, musically talented people he can consider study buddies, he was actually almost an idol once when he nearly signed on with a company because of how musically talented he is as a producer and songwriter - typically he only writes for close friends and always ensures the lyrics feel truthful and genuine to his friend’s stories but yeah give me people he is encouraged by with that and just able to be himself with. 

friends from america potentially as well

other criminal underground kinda connections bc u know keeps business thriving to link up with other famously dangerous people and work together. 

i would so love a good cop,bad cop type thing where someone who he’s on the police force with or is also training to be in the police force with him is genuine and legit and knows he isn’t and is kinda like shunning tf outta him for it but also trying to teach him how to be better without even realizing it and sort of having their mind changed on how simple good and bad is bc actually there is kind of a grey area which joo belonged to. 

ex’s of course 

as much as i love friends who don’t know about joo’s other life, i’d also love some friends who did and were hella concerned bc like siren noises what is this boi doing he’s gonna get himself killed and does he even cAre bc he fuckin should

roomies plssss 

enemies and rivals are always welcome too maybe ppl who dislike him for turning away from the crime life and going straight or whatever rlly i also rlly like the idea of someone who sort of admired him and has a personal grudge bc he was so good at being a criminal and he made such a legacy and then he just abandoned it and they feel he wasted it or something

[scripted-dalliances]

Rest In Peace: Chapter Six

Title: Rest In Peace

Chapter: 6

Summary: A part of Faithless Fairy Tale, a more in depth look at how they brought Laura back to life. Appearance of old faces, creation of new ones and if you’re looking for canon, it left a long, long time ago. If you squint you might be able to see some pieces from the book.

“No, love, in real life you can get all the way to death and never have finished one single story." -Catherynne M. Valente

+

“I can't believe I'm doing this.” Laura tells herself, looking at the open deep freezer before her. What had started as a seedling of a threat from Sweeney, had now become a reality of her own making because she could feel herself getting squishy.

She had moved what she could, shoving it into a different freezer across the way. Piling things that wouldn't matter next to it. If Ostara really cared about the damp bag of peas, she would buy her a new bag. Correction, she would make someone who was tall and ginger buy a new bag. This was technically his idea.

With help from an overturned bucket, Laura climbs in and lays down. The deep freezer is wide and long enough that it's an easy feat if she curls on her side. She can't really feel the cold any more, but she does relax a bit. No longer feeling like she's about to melt, or worse, start dropping limbs like a break dancing leaper.

-but the silence becomes an issue. And the darkness.

Laura forces herself to fake breathe in deep and out, twice before accepting defeat and pushing the freezer back open.

With renewed energy, she climbs out and rushes up the stairs, back into the massive kitchen where she finds Sweeney about to bite into a sandwich.

“I need your help.” She admits, and it pains her, it really does. The last time she asked for help...shit she doesn't even remember. Its like taking a knife to her own guts. But somehow, in the after math of his little story time, she finds the words slip out easy as a sin.

Sweeney looks angrily at her, then to the sandwich in his hands. Then back again, clearly struggling to make a choice.

“You can bring the damned sandwich. I don't care.” She tells him, only to promptly turn back down the stairs so she doesn't have to argue with him.  She waits on top of the bucket until he shows up. He takes one glance at the freezer then at her and frowns.

“I thought we were good.”

“We are.” As good as either of them could get. Her being dead, him her killer and the god that decided to fuck with them both gone. Obviously there was remaining issues but they were working on them. “I need you to talk to me while I chill in here. So I don't feel like I'm about to melt into a goo.”

“...You want me to talk?”

“Yup.” She chirps. Opening the freezer once more to climb in, back into the winter darkness that awaited. This time, when it shuts closed, she waits to hear his voice.

Finally after a beat, she hears him.

“What exactly do you want me to say?”

“I don't care.”

She can't see it, but she knows he's rolling his eyes.

“How about I tell you of the time some undeserving bastard stole my coin and how I met the smallest, bitterest dead bitch in the world?”

Laura grins widely, knowing he can't see.

“Yeah. Okay. Tell me that one.”

+

He tells her tales. Some from his past, now that she knows, he can tell her the bits and pieces that aren't important. That only he knows, that only matter to him. He tells her of the Gods and Goddesses he has met, working for the man she knows as Wednesday who would later be revealed as Odin. He tells her how some of them are doing just fine, how others live in the gutter. Which ones he likes. Which ones he hates with a passion.

Who chased him from their doorsteps and who tried to eat him.

He tells her about the time he went on a drunken rampage and burned down a Lucky Charms factory.

About the time he got into a fist fight with an Irish nun in New York because she wouldn't stop bad mouthing his kind. He had been young and bitter, and following some young lad who still believed.

“Who won?” Laura's voice echoes out from the deep freezer.

Sweeney grins, “I fuckin' did. Cops saw her throw the first punch, hauled her away.”

Laura laughs, and he decides to tell her about the time in Las Vegas, he saw three strippers of various stages of undress bitch slap Odin. How when he went to defend the old dirty bastard, they kneed him in the junk and stole his wallet.

All because they were all sisters of Lady Luck.

That one makes her laugh hard enough to pop her jaw out of its alignment.

+

“Your turn.” Sweeney proclaims hours later. The night is nearly over, and he's not slept but it's not a problem. He doesn't feel tired.

“My turn?”

“Tell me a tale.”

“Nah,” She drawls, “I mean, the dead tell no tales, remember?”

“Cop out.” He tells her, throwing a pea he found on the floor at her freezer.

A whole minute passes in silence before she speaks again.

“How about I tell you about the time some asshole leprechaun tried to bully me?”

“Aye, tell me that one then. He sounds like a handsome lad.”

+

Laura isn't the best story teller, but she manages to spin a web of interest. More than once getting distracted by a minor twist that she has to explain. Or to defend her choice, because Sweeney isn't a good listener and he wants to argue with her just to drive her up the wall. There are points in stories where she has to raise her voice just to keep it going over him.

She has to fight to tell her tales.

She tells him of the time her mother had an affair with her Sunday school teacher, and that's probably what jump started her apathy for religion. He mocks that maybe that's just how her mother choose to pray to her god.

She tells him about meeting Shadow, and he complains how lame of a meeting it is. She argues that it's a lot more interesting than most.

Finally she tells him about the world of sand, the God judging her and the feather instead.

“...Shit. That sounds like Mr.Jacquel. Or Anubis if you’re dead. Cheerful bugger was he? Haughty as the Pope and twice as judgmental? Wears a black smock like a granny at a funeral?”

“That doesn't make sense...but yeah. Why, he on Odin's side too?”

“No. He doesn't pick sides. Death gods don't have troubles like the rest of us do as much. They just get bored, go mad with it before they fade. Grimnir was friendly enough with ‘em, but only because they owed him a favor or two. What did you do?”

Laura thinks about lying, of telling him that she was drawn back before anything could be done.

Instead, she finds herself telling him the truth, “He tried to reach for my heart and I smacked his fucking hand. Then told me he had to weigh my heart against a fucking feather of all things.”

“That's how they do it, I hear there was one that ate your sins or something like it. Was he there?”

“Never got that far. I slammed my hand down on his stupid little scale. Good or bad, I lived my life and it sure as fuck wasn't light as a feather.” Laura recalls the god's stunned expression, that quickly turned into simmering anger at her attitude. “He told me I was to go to darkness. Not peaceful nothingness, darkness. To be crammed into a hot tub like the one I attempted to killed myself, complete with bug spray. So I told him to go fuck himself.” She still remembers how she felt. Pissed off and cheated.

Maybe she didn't believe in a fluffy cloud heaven, and more over knows she doesn't meet the requirements to get through those particular pearly gates but it had seem unfair regardless. If she hadn't believed, if she had simply vanished from the world that would have been better. Easier to accept.

Instead she felt insulted and punished for not believing at all, in anything. For not making a choice. And that wasn't even mentioning she wasn't even suppose to die, that gods had interfered with the course of her life for their own personal gain.

“Oh, I bet he was pissed. No one likes disorder like Mr. Jacquel.”

“He was fine with it last time I saw him.”

The lid of the freezer is lifted, Sweeney peers down at her, “You saw him again?”

Laura leans up onto her elbows, “Yeah. After I punched the shit out of those guys for hurting Shadow. I tore my arm off, and was trying to piece it back together with Aubrey’s crafting supplies. Next thing I know I’m bumping into him and his brother. They offered to stitch me up and give me a make over.”

His face contorts into clear confusion.

“The gods of death gave you a bloody make over.”

“You got a hearing problem? Yes. Why?” Laura stood up, only mildly annoyed with the fact that even in the box she was hardly reaching his neck. “I got the impression they didn't care what I did. So what does it matter? You said yourself they don't really pick sides.”

“Aye, when it comes to Grimnir and his war, no. They keep to themselves, on occasion they help out for a favor but that doesn't mean they ain’t got their own agendas. That's every god, dead girl. Not a single damn one of them does something for nothing. Not even Jesus Christ himself.”

He has a point.

“All he said was that I had a heavy heart, and oh man, didn't that suck. Oh, and some bullshit about vowing to return me to darkness.”

“Well it is the man's job.”

Something clicks, “Why is that?”

Sweeney sucks in a deep breath and rolls his eyes, “If I have to fuckin’ explain the ins and outs of what it means to be a god of death, I will cut my own throat with a fuckin' butter knife. His real name is Anubis, surely you took an ancient history class once or twice. Or has the American educational system become that bad?”

“It has, but not my question. I meant why him. I didn't believe in anything, that's what he told me himself. So why the hell was Anubis the Egyptian god of death in charge of my, clearly not Egyptian ass?”

It's a good enough question to stump the leprechaun for a moment or two, eventually offering a hesitant, “Coulda been the ol one eyed bastard again.”

“Question is still why, numb nuts. I was dead, super buried and all that jazz. No way in hell he accounts for Shadow getting your coin and him dropping it on my grave. What would have been the point of him going the extra mile of hiring Anubis to deal with me. I mean, if we are going by that logic, wouldn't it be easier to send one of the Jesus Christ super stars, someone I would have easily recognize and maybe not question if he just kick me down to hell?”

“I've only met the brothers twice, all I know is that they have a crazy cat sister and a crazier missing brother. Rest of the family is either rumors or gone. They've been running that funeral home for ages, neither of them have a taste for trouble or war. All they really seem to care about is hearing a good story and getting a good nibble on the dead.”

Which, holy shit why did no one mention that had to be something she worried about now.

“You mean they could have eaten me?”

“Not you, dead girl. To them you are a questionable chicken salad sandwich from the gas station gone bad. They like their meat a bit fresher.”

“Thanks.” She glowers, debating whether or not to punch him but when she goes to peer over the edge of the freezer, finds that something is missing. “Where's my bucket?”

“Oh, you mean my bucket? The one I had to sit on so my arse didn't go numb as fuck, sitting on the ground down here, talkin to you? Aye, that bucket is over there.” His joy evident as he points to said bucket,  which is a clear distance away from where she needs it to be. If she doesn't want to attempt to climb out of this damn thing like a toddler out of a crib.

“Go get my bucket.”

“My bucket, you mean.”

Laura feels the anger in her bubble up, “Either you get that bucket for me or I will stand up on this ledge, fling myself up at your stupid head and rip out every single strand of ugly hair you have. Including your fucking nose hair!”

“You can’t reach, cunt!”

“Wanna fucking bet?”

Laura makes a false pinching attempt towards him, and he steps back so quick he almost trips over his own feet. She smiles, satisfied at his growl until he stomps over and picks her up. Massive, strong hands wrap around her waist and for a second she is weightless.

She has always been a tiny woman, shorter than most, and that meant she was used to people; mostly men hauling her up. She didn't hate it, and even enjoyed the action with Shadow but normally it was just the sensation of being carried up. Of her toes leaving the ground and her weight being rested against someone's chest or arms.

Like she's something to carried, luggage turned burden because that's what happens. They pick her up, twirl her around and only then, realize slowly she is heavy in different ways.

She isn't what they expect hidden under her appearance, of a slim girl with no scars to see. She is dense bones and tense muscle, lacking sweetness and kindness, with a heavier heart than most. That’s when they put her down. Or let her down. Which ever comes first.

It's different with Sweeney, in his grasp she feels lighter. Like she's made up of something soft and airy, like spun cotton candy from a carnival. All because his strength completely envelops her, forcing her to realize this is him weak. This is him without his luck that currently rest in her belly, and yet it's still enough to make her feel as though she was floating.

Shit, if this is half of what people felt in the arms of their patron of worship, she could understand.

Unconsciously, she reaches out before he can let her go. Touching his wrists where they rest on her waist, making him go still. Obviously he had meant to just help her out, but she isn't ready to let this feeling go, not  just yet.

It's nothing like kissing Shadow, where she felt her heart beat, like she was drinking down a new born star and would happily implode if she could have just consumed her fill of him and his warmth; his love, she had wrongly assumed.

This, makes her lungs expand and draw in air. She exhales slowly, sharper than before. Like for once she needs to breath.

“What is this? What's happening?” She feels rather than sees his shrug, the bunching of his arms the way his pulse jumps under her thumbs.

“Your guess is good as mine, dead girl.”

Laura’s mind races. Nothing makes sense. Sure they swapped some stories, and she did her best to keep an open mind but surely it's not that easy? Getting an oil change is harder.

“It feels…” She can't explain.

Sweeney shifts subtly, enough for her to look up at him and gauges his guilty expression.

“Don't make this weird.”

“I ain't!”

“You so are.”

-and just like that, he is dropping her completely. Pulling his hands away and stalking back up the stairs. Muttering darkly under his breath.

Before he can shut the door, Laura shouts.

“That was a weird reaction, by the way.”

He slams the door so hard it cracks.

>

[itsallavengers]

1 and stony???

Come over here and make me.

If there was one person Steve Rogers hated, it was Tony Stark.

God, that asshole. Thought he was hot shit because he was popular and the star player of the school soccer team and smart and funny and beautiful. And he always walked around wearing that ridiculous leather jacket with about a hundred zips and buttons on it, and it wasn’t cool, no matter what he said.

And the worst part about Tony Stark was definitely how nice he was to Steve.

Because it didn’t make sense, alright. For the first few years of highschool, Tony had laughed at him, he’d thrown pencils at the back of his head in class and bumped him in the halls and Steve had automatically bitten back on a sigh whenever he’d seen Tony in the corridors with him. He’d known Tony Stark was an asshole from day one, when he’d been twelve and Tony had told him how weird his backpack was.

And yet over the past few years, Tony’s attitude had changed. He’d stopped being such a dick. He smiled at him rather than laughing at him, and he waved on the corridors rather than just shove him, and Steve didn’t get it. Tony Stark was definitely plotting something, and was in it for the long haul here, because he wouldn’t just be nice to Steve for no reason. No way. 

Steve always watched him, just in case. Seeing as an attack could be at any moment, it was better to always be alert. He glanced over to Tony in math class and kept his eyes on Tony’s ass back when he walked through the corridors. Sometimes Tony would say hi, and Steve would say it back warily, keeping a hand tight around his backpack as he watched where Tony’s beautifully hazel eyes went, and whether they were plotting anything. 

One time, he’d overheard Tony talking to his friend Rhodey about one of his dates when they’d been sat nearby one another in bio, and Steve had heard all about how shittily it had gone, which definitely made him feel good. Because not only was Tony Stark an asshole, but the guy he’d been on the date with- Tiberius Stone- was an even bigger asshole, and Steve felt uncomfortable with the thought of Ty being anywhere near him.

Because then they’d just make each other worse, and it’d be bad for Steve, obviously.

He thought about it a lot during that biology class, actually. How, if he were to go on a date with Tony Stark (for information gathering purposes), he’d make it perfect. He’d learned a lot about Tony over the years. He knew that the boy liked Metallica, but he also had a soft spot for Frank Sinatra. Steve had a record of that which he’d play. And then Tony loved Twinkies, too. Steve could buy them, and he’d declare it their main course, and Tony would laugh that pretty laugh where his mouth curled up and his eyes crinkled and-

And yeah. That Steve would have the bastard right where he wanted him. Totally. 

But God, he’d never do what Ty had done- a shitty movie and then copping a feel in the back of the cinema? So fucking trashy. And cheap. Steve might be broke as shit, but if it was a date, then he’d put some Goddamn effort into at least making it nice for Tony, Jesus-

Hypothetically, of course. Because Steve wouldn’t ever date Tony Stark.

That being said, he probably shouldn’t have been talking about how crap Ty’s dating skills were to Bucky when the guy’s friends had been right behind him in the corridor anyway, hypothetical or not. Because as soon as they saw him again when Steve was alone, they didn’t waste any time with shoving him up against the lockers and then doing their level best to shove him inside one of them.

God, Steve hated highschool.

“Get the fuck off me,” Steve growled, yanking away as hard as he could against their hands as they tried to shove him backward. It wasn’t much use though- two versus one, and Steve wasn’t exactly fighting material, no matter how many times he managed to get into them. 

“Shut the fuck up, loser,” the bigger guy spat on him, actually fucking spat on him, and then punched him in the mouth for good measure, “this’ll teach you not to talk shit about people who are gonna be more than you ever will. The fuck were you even talking about- Ty’s a fuckin’ beast, he’s got people fallin’ at his feet.”

Steve rolled his eyes. What, were they going to start worshipping at his alter now? 

“You’re only jealous,” the second guy said with a sneer, and Steve laughed out at him blindly but the first guy pulled him back, opening him up for a bodyshot to his ribs that definitely made something crack, “we see the way you look at Tony. You’re obsessed with him. You got Rogers + Stark written on your notebooks, huh?”

“Fucking pathetic.”

“As if he’d ever look twice at you.”

Steve snarled, lashing his head forward and actually managing to brain one of them. “Fuck off- Tony Stark is an asshole,” he told them- the same thing he told everyone, because it was true-

“He’s right, you know.”

Steve’s head jerked as his brain recognised the voice immediately, and he watched as none other than Tony Stark himself marched forward, coming up behind the two guys currently doing their best to fit Steve into the locker. A strong hand curled around the first guy’s shoulders, and then Steve felt a sharp relief of pressure as Tony flung him off Steve and into the opposing wall. The second one backed off in surprise, putting out his hands as a show of peace.

“Whoah, hey, Tony, just calm it,” he said hurriedly, “I didn’t know you were buddies-”

“We’re not buddies,” Steve said viciously, raising his fists and then wiping his bloody nose with his sleeve. In front of him, Tony just looked vaguely amused. “If you want to try it as well, go the fuck ahead,” Steve growled, “I’ll fight all three of ya, I don’t care-”

“No one is doing any more fighting here, thank you very much,” Tony said, raising a hand. When he did, all of his stupid fucking zips jingled. “Morris, Elland- get fucking lost. You’re both getting black eyes tomorrow, and if I see you putting hands on Rogers again then I’m burning your Air Jordans, understand?”

Steve blinked in confusion, watching the two guys nod nervously and then scurry off down the hall, muttering to one another and glancing back as they did so. Which just left Steve and Tony with his stupid jangly zips.

“What do you want,” Steve said, not lowing his hands.

Tony leaned against the lockers, shrugging. “I was coming back from detention and saw them beating on you. Thought I’d step in.”

Steve frowned, wiping his hand across his face and probably smearing more blood everywhere. “Yeah, well I don’t need your help,” he said gruffly, “I totally had that.”

Tony’s eyes twinkled. “They definitely seemed like they were only holding on by the skin of their teeth,” he said in amusement, as Steve just scowled and turned away.

He heard Tony step forward. “Hey, I didn’t mean that to sound... I’m sure you would’ve survived on your own, God knows you get into enough altercations as it is- just thought I’d help you out. They shit their pants when I get mad at them because they’re fucking pussies, so.” Tony shrugged, “it’d be cool to have someone like that on your side, I figure-”

“You’re not on my side!” Steve snapped, stepping forward, “you’re just... you’re just being weirdly nice so that I let my guard down and then you can make fun of me again, or humiliate me in class or shove me over in the halls. Don’t think I’m not onto you, Stark, okay, I know your game!” He waggled a finger menacingly.

Tony just sighed, and looked genuinely remorseful as he said, “yeah, really sorry about that. I was a prepubescent teen with no idea what to do with the sudden influx of gay thoughts I’d have whenever you entered a room. So I pulled on your pigtails in order to get your attention.” Tony pulled a face, before smiling, “but I’m cooler now! Comfortable with my sexuality, at least thirty percent more stable and also, still kind of crazy about you.”

Steve just blinked. “No you’re not,” he said.

“Yeah, I am.”

“Nope. No you’re really not.”

“Well, I beg to differ.”

Steve made a face. “You don’t even know me!” he spluttered, “you’re not... you don’t like me, don’t be ridiculous. You think I’m dorky and uncool.”

Tony laughed, and God, it really was a nice laugh. “I do,” he agreed, “and that is the most endearing thing in the world.” He paused, before adding, “actually no- the face you’re making right now is the most endearing thing in the world.”

Steve... had no idea how to respond. He... well... I mean, for starters, he didn’t even like Tony. “I don’t even like you.”

“Yeah, you do.”

“You’re- you’re an asshole, I hate you! I’ve always hated you. You suck.”

“Yes to the asshole part. No to the ‘you hate me part’, Yes to the ‘you suck’ part, but probably in a different context to what you’re thinking.” Tony paused, before looking at Steve’s face with a frown. “You might want to go A&E for that nose. Looks broken.”

Steve’s head was spinning. Tony was completely bamboozling him here. Why was he saying that he liked Steve? That was... that couldn’t be true, could it? Anyway. Steve didn’t even like him.

On a completely irrelevant note, he bet that if he kissed Tony now, he’d probably taste faintly like the strawberries Steve had seen him eating for lunch. 

“I’m not going to the hospital,” Steve said, shaking his head and pressing gently on his very sore nose, “it’s f-”

“Yeah, you’re going to the hospital,” Tony nodded slowly and then pulled out his phone. “It’s fifteen minutes away. I’ll drive.”

Steve looked at him incredulously. “Stop ignoring me! I’m not going!”

“You are, Steve.”

“You think?”

“Yeah.”

Steve spluttered indignantly, hands going to his hips. “Then- then come over here and make me!” He said, attempting at confrontational. 

But Tony just cocked an eyebrow in amusement, and before Steve knew what was happening, Tony had swooped down and then picked him up in a perfect fireman’s carry, walking them both down the corridor with absolute ease. Steve just froze in complete and utter shock. This was the first time he’d ever been this close to Tony. Oh God, he smelt like metal and lemony things, and Steve was looking right down at he perfectly shaped ass.

“I hate you so much,” Steve said grumpily, “and I really hate being carried.”

Tony continued on, unfazed. “Okay, so I have a proposition,” he said casually, pushing open the main exit doors and then plodding easily down the stairs. He stopped halfway down, however. “I’ll let you down if you agree to go on a date with me.”

Steve froze. “That’s not fair,” he said weakly. 

Above him, Tony sighed. “Okay. So that was a lie. I’ll let you down right now if you want me to, I’m not an asshole, and I’m not going to force you to go the hospital, but I really think you should. And. Also. The date thing. You should do that too. Because I’m an asshole and my jacket probably does have too many zips, you’re right, but I also really like you and have done for six years, I’ve always just been too scared to tell you?” Tony shrugged sheepishly. “But there. Offer’s on the table. Hey! Kill two birds with one stone- the hospital trip can count as our date, and then if you decide that actually I’m not evil whilst we’re there, we could maybe go for a second one sometime?”

Jesus, Tony actually sounded nervous. Steve couldn’t see his face, but he knew what it would look like, because he’d memorised all of Tony’s facial expressions. 

Shit.

Okay. 

So maybe he didn’t hate Tony Stark as much as he thought.

“Put me down,” Steve told him, and with a small sigh of defeat, Tony did. He looked down at his expensive shoes and stepped back, readying to accept defeat. 

Steve just sighed. “I suppose I could go to the hospital,” he muttered, “if you insist. And. Uh. The date, too. We could do that sometime as well.”

Tony paused, but then his head jerked up and he practically beamed. “Really?” He asked, beginning to bounce on his toes. 

Steve couldn’t help but laugh, even though it really hurt. “Yeah, really,” he said, “I guess I was kind of exaggerating how terribly evil you were in order to save myself from uh- going too far the other way.”

Tony’s smile, if even physically possible, grew bigger. “That’s the biggest compliment anyone has ever told me,” he said, holding out a hand for Steve to take, “now can you please take my hand and let me escort you to the vehicle?”

Steve raised an eyebrow, but tentatively slid his fingers through Tony’s. “I can walk, you know.”

Tony squeezed their hands together. “Oh, I know. I’ve just wanted to hold hands with you since I was twelve.”

[thenervousmedic]

A coffee a day... (Connor X Reader)

Note : (Dying noises)

Word count : just over 3k.

Chapter 6 : Lose one thing to gain another.

Teenagers can be so cruel.

At a time in your life where every little interaction means the world to you, outside influence can change an angel to a brat or a shy girl into a monster.

Fortunately for you, bullies didn't get to you very often. If anything you found their dumb insults funny because of the many vastly better ones you had already thought of. Just calling you ‘Fat’ or ‘ugly’ wasn't enough anymore- if they wanted a fight they'd have to work for it.

That being said… you had a pretty big weakness. Other bullied students.

You hated watching them get torn to shreds by some tough guy dumbass and their trio of mindless minions.

“G-Gavin, please, I j-just need to get past-” A small, dorky looking, man cried out as he was pushed into the dirt. His glasses skidding across the gravel towards your feet. The bullies shouted mean things, but you barely noticed, interrupting their enjoyment with a rough punch to his face. It stung your knuckles like hell, but the look of shock they gave you was more than worth it.

“Go fuck yourself, Gavin.” You spat harshly as they turned tail to tell a teacher on you; the runty child at your back dusting himself off.

“T-thanks…” He fumbled with his glasses, sliding them awkwardly up a wonky button nose. “You didn't have to.”

“Of course I did.” You scoff proudly, holding yourself a lot more confidently than your new companion. “Come on, you're staying with me now, they won't bother you anymore.What is your name?”

He stares at you, at a complete loss for words, before nodding briskly and taking your hand. “My name Is J-Jayden, you?”

“Y/N.”

--

“Y/N, I must insist you rest-”

“Nuh-uh. You said I should help if I could, so I'm going to help.” Your determination came off as stubbornness but it was all in good intentions. Today was going to be a slow day, but if you could at the very least stay with your two guardians during their work hours you'd feel a little less awkward about being left in Hanks home by yourself.

“Hank, how do I get them to cooperate-” It was then you noticed him watching the two of you. Clearly finding this funny, a big shit eating grin plastered to his muzzle. The lack of drinking the night before meant to hangover- something Hank sometimes wished he had anyway to tolerate Connors non-stop working demeanor.

“Give up, Connor, it's not worth getting your wires in a twist.”

“My wires can't get twisted, lieutenant, they're not-”

“For fucks sake, just forget it-” It was your turn to grin like a dumbass as Connors lip twinged into a tiny smirk. If you didn't know better you'd think Connor was annoying his partner on purpose.

“Don't be too hard on Puppydroid, he's still learning to adapt to your attitude.” You and Hank share an amused glance at one another. Connor suddenly looking a little lost in the conversation.

“In that case he's got a whole lot to adapt to.”

“You don't say?”

The face you made, the rising inflection in your tone, Hank knew what you just referenced and tried not to reply in a joking manner. He had a job to do, as annoying as that was, and the idea of Connor reminding him yet again how much time they were wasting just pissed him off internally.

“Would you like me to catch you up on what we discovered last night? Y/N made some very interesting connections.”

A grumble was all Connor got as everyone left the house, taking that as an invitation to continue. “Y/N brought a speech made by Mr.Kamski to my attention. It has mention of the codeword we are using for our connective focus. Biocode. It sounds like, as well as our mechanical coding, androids have been embedded with experiences that predate our creation.”

“It's like putting your actual thoughts into someone else's head!” You added In the moment Connor paused to let Hank process the information.

“So wait.-" His pace slowed slightly, allowing for the three of you to walk side by side Instead of slightly behind his lead. “-You're suggesting androids have emotions and free will hidden in their code before they deviate? That's insane.”

Connor frowned, clearly wanting to defend your discovery as the police station lurked in the distance. “It would explain the sudden rise in Deviant reports. As well as make sense of how deviancy spreads so easily. Anyone with the key to unlock that source code could potentially deviate anyone they come into contact with. What's worse is that… It might be manipulated if someone knows how to access it.”

“And what about you, Connor, huh?” The way Hank’s growl turned aggravated gave you a sense of caution. How was it a man with only his voice could make you feel safe one moment then urge you to keep away from them the next? “If your ‘theory’ is right, that makes everyone a deviant, just waiting to realise it. That means technically you’re a-”

“I am not a deviant, I have a mission to complete and that’s what I intend to do.” You noticeably flinched as Connor raised his voice, something you’d not seen him do before. That calm analytical  tone was all you were used to, not the sudden burst of anger that had just snapped beside you. His face softened on noticing the concern in your eyes. The abrupt change in temperment sent errors up in his sight here and there.

Hank sighed, it was long, heavy, like someone just let the air out of a very old balloon. “Yeah. You’re right… like you’d give a damn about anything other than the fuckin’ mission.” It was like the witty banter you all shared moments ago had never happened. Something electrical and stone cold squeezed your heart tightly; threatening to break it. A figurative dark cloud hanging over everyone despite the bright sunshine that shone overhead.

Your opinion was an unpopular one. That deviants didn’t need ‘fixing’, that they felt love and hate and everything in between, and your now-gone friend Adam was proof of that. He had dreams and aspirations He was so nice and continued to do his job even after deviating because of how much he enjoyed it. But now you’d…. Never see him again.

It hit you like a truck. Loss, realisation, anger, denial. Everything at once crashed onto your throat making you unable to join in the conversation to ease the tension.

Neither Connor nor Hank seemed to notice, your blank warm-hearted smile masking the inner workings that started to scream out his name. It wasn't too bad. You told yourself it was fine. The guilt you felt at forgetting him so easily, the need to tell him you were sorry, strangled out as a strained cough amongst the silence. It came out almost like a choking sound, Connor’s head turning sharply to look at you with hollow eyes, your composure faltering for but a small second before you started walking regularly again.

It was a lot all at once, but you would handle it… they didn't need to know...

The police station was quite nice, a mix of modern technology and design without compromising any accessibility. People sat at their workplaces in neat uniform with equally neat desks save for a few here and there that were less organised than the others. As always it made you nervous. You had nothing against cops, most of them were really nice people, it’s just the force behind them. People armed to the teeth with ways to subdue and kill you, people trained to appear friendly even if they dislike you in order to uphold the precincts reputation. That being said, there were also plenty of shitty law officers who would gladly talk shit for the sake of doing so. Come to think of it-

“Oh goodie, here comes the walking calculator.” Most everyone, including Connor, completely ignored the voice that approached from afar. Hank headed to his desk, not looking back, as Connor’s path was blocked by a slightly shorter man. He wore scruffy messy clothing, barely enough to make him look like he actually cared about his job, with just as messy brown hair spiking out in all directions. You had to hide an angry grin at noticing the name on his jacket and the crooked scar across his nose. “Got yourself a girlfriend, huh?”

As he squared his gaze with yours the defiant smile you wore was enough to catch him by surprise. “Hi Gavin.” You growled, very uncharacteristically hostile toward the officer as he continued to get in Connor's way. “How’s your face?”

“Better than yours by the looks of it.” He grumbled back, much to Connor’s confusion as you two continued to glare at one another like your eyes were doing all the fighting. He huffed, leaning against the wall in front of you two. “Look who isn’t an officer-”

“Look who is still an asshole-”

“Y/N, please, we have work to do.” Connor’s hand reached for your shoulder as the rivalry escalated, your nerves tingling at the thought of getting to have another fight with your long-time childhood opponent. But he was right. You couldn’t fight him here, it’s literally a police station, and your wound wouldn’t exactly fair well from a scrap either. You shrugged his hand away from your side, crossing your arms with an irritated pout before following Connor as you both walked around Gavin. “You know Officer Reed?” His curiosity was inevitable considering what just occurred.

“Yes. I know Gavin.” The spite in your voice had obviously intrigued the android since he wouldn't stop staring at you expectantly.

“You don't seem to like each other.”

“I broke his nose.” You pointed out, motioning to your own nose before flicking a glance back at Gavin (Who was now sauntering his way to the break room like your conversation never happened.) God you hate Gavin.

“Oh…” Connor’s face expressed an awkwardness that made you smile again, it seems he realised that this conversation would be best left for later. “Well, lets focus on the task at hand.”

--

You were right, today was gonna be a long one, the time seemed to tick on almost as slowly as when you were at your real job. Though it wasn’t really a bad thing, you had plenty of time to watch Hank yell at his boss and glare at Gavin from across the room.

You didn’t want to mention anything about it to Connor, but Gavin had liked you quite a lot in high school… you hated admitting when you were wrong, but you knew for certain that back then you had done plenty of wrong deeds. It was such a shame. Gavin had started out so promising, charming even, and yet during his time with you he just got meaner and meaner. Beating up Jayden was the last straw for you back then, you couldn’t just stand aside and enable his bad habits.

To be truthful you hadn’t meant to break his nose… turns out you punch a hell of a lot stronger than you might think.

“Y/N, come look at this.” Hank had finally said something after seemingly being pissed off at connor for several hours. You jumped at the opportunity to get involved, jogging light bouncy steps to his side of the desk before leaning over to look at his screen.

Rumours of the mass-hostage situation had already gone public, people were ranting all sorts of nonsense online, people were even videoing themselves throwing their androids down pits or off of bridges. Tearing limbs off, beating them with bats, setting them on fire. You could see the fear in their eyes, the pure terror, the complete hopelessness as they bled out blueblood onto the floor.

“Do you think- Hey, you alright?” You hadn’t realised you were tearing up until Hank closed the page and held your arm tightly. “Easy kiddo…”

“I-I’m ok.” you smiled, sniffling while rubbing your eyes roughly with your sleeve. Mind reeling from the sudden outburst of information in your head. “-Just forgot to blink is all.”

But it was too late. You only barely held it together earlier, seeing the androids treated this way was enough to push you over the edge. Tears dribbled uncontrollably across your face despite your best efforts to fight them away. All you were thinking about is not looking upset, and that wasn’t going to plan.

You tried laughing quietly to make it less painful to sniffle back breaths but it wasn’t much help. “Hey, hey, it’s ok. Don’t be like that.” A large pair of arms wrapped around your shoulders, comfortably cuddling you up against a rough shirt. Hank’s concerned voice was almost fatherly and as much as it was getting him strange looks he was doing his best to calm you down. Rocking ever so slightly from side to side as you sobbed helplessly into his arm. “It’s alright, you’re ok, let it out.”

“Lieutenant?” Connor had risen from his desk, watching with conflicted confusion as Hank held you in an almost protective stance.

“I’m ok.” You whimpered softly, at this point numb to the fact you were breaking down in a public place.

Adam was gone, Connor had almost been destroyed, and you had nobody to go to. Knowing next time you go to work, after all of this, you’ll walk into an empty building and spend the day with a replacement android… it was tearing at your throat. You'd never hear his laugh again. Never see the cute happy dances he did when talking about coffee, or the beaming grin that welcomed you every single morning without fail. He was so sweet, why did he have to die? He didn’t deserve that! It wasn’t fair!

“He w-was alive, Hank, he was D-deviant.” You mumbled past the hitched breaths, already feeling the burning stare that was Connor's eyes on your back. It made you shiver. You didn’t feel safe. “Why are people treating androids like this- they’re not just MACHINES!” you pushed Hank away, struggling out of his grip before harshly clutching at your stomach as it began to ache.

Connor caught you as you stumbled backwards. His grip was unwavering- unlike hank’s gentle hold. “You have to calm down, you’re going to hurt yourself-”

“Yeah that’d really slow you down wouldn’t it Connor?” You sounded bitter, and wow did it sting. You couldn’t see past the blurry vision, but his face looked utterly heartbroken. It’s like someone just told him his dog died, his grip slackened enough for you to realise what you had said might’ve been a little harsh. He had insisted he wasn’t deviant…. But you knew he had something in there. Whether it was emotion or just an accurate simulation of them you felt an immediate regret for saying what you did.

“I’m… sorry.” He let go, taking a step away while you finally managed to rub the water off of your face. “T-that was uncalled for.”

“No, it’s alright, you’re experiencing delayed symptoms of mourning. The android you worked with must have been very close to you. This is ok-.” Hank, who had backed away a little, gestured your way. Encouraging Connor to take control of the situation. He was hesitant but eventually leaned our towards you- lightly cupping you in his embrace much like how Hank had done before. You didn’t fight it, but you didn't hug back either, just kind of leaning on him with your forehead on his chest. You could swear you could feel his ‘heart’ bumping underneath his jacket. “You are ok now, just try to breathe.”

You tried, god you tried so hard, but the more you put effort into it the more you sniffled and paused. It was eventually possible to take longer, less shuddering, breaths. You didn't have the energy to feel embarrassed or ashamed. The periodic ‘babump’ of the Thirium pump beneath his shirt was something to focus on, your upcoming headache making you groan irritably. “It was nice having you in today but I think it’s about time to take you home.” He let go of you, keeping one arm over your back and around your shoulder so he could walk you out.

You were silent almost the entire walk home. Barely noticing the aura of worry and unease that radiated from your assistant…

--

It was like how he imagine being shot must have felt, hearing what you had said, the burning in his chest sending false system reports through his processor. Yes, yes it would slow him down, but it wasn’t like that. He didn’t want you to be safe just for the sake of the mission - but even the thought of wanting outside of his objective was… doing something. Was it… fear? Did he fear the idea of thinking he’s more than just hardware built for a certain purpose? Surely not, that’s silly. Androids don’t feel fear.

“Deviants do.” He mumbled aloud, not realising he had done so until your sore reddened eyes were spotted tiredly googling up at him. “Your coworker. He was deviant?”

He could almost see the pain that shot into your gaze before you looked back at the street. “Yeah…” He was going to have to dig if he was going to get more than that, your appeared exhausted despite getting more than enough rest for a woman your age.

A bit of time passed before he eventually tried again, giving you a moment to think. “Deviants feel fear and anger, unlike regular androids, why would you want that?” It was unclear why, but you truly did seem to believe that deviancy was a good thing despite all the trouble it has caused.

“That's only one side of the coin, Connor, fear isn’t everything.”

“But it is a part of it…”

“Yes, of course it is!” Your voice raised ever so slightly but a sore throat calmed it back down. The sadness slowly melted away as you spoke about it, getting replaced with some quieter form of passion that bubbled deep under the surface. “Anger and fear exist but that’s not the point, the point is there's better feelings than those ones. Like contentment, happiness, pride-”

“Love?” His contribution made you hesitate. Was he wrong? Love was certainly something… able to tear a man apart or rebuild him from the ground up. Connor’s experiences with these emotions were limited to reading their definition out of a dictionary or observing what they did to others.

“Yeah…” your cheeks had turned red, a fever? No. you were.. .what's the word… blushing. His LED spun yellow, unable to look away at the lost look on your face, totally immersed in whatever it was you were thinking about.

“…I think I’d like to feel that someday.” He should’ve thought more carefully about saying these words out loud. If Cyberlife caught wind of this it would mean being deactivated to erase those thoughts. But this wasn't on his mind right now.

It's like he's seeing you for the first time. That faint sparkle in your eye, every little imperfection on your skin, the way a few stray strands of hair curled down across your forehead. His Thirium pump having the same system error he had experienced before. “You'd need to deviate to feel love, Connor, you said…” Your heart rate had increased, coupled with another number of minute details that surely only an android would notice. Otherwise in your tone, the way your pupils dilated when they met his own.

Hanks house stood in front of both of you as he let go, fighting quietly with the choices laid out before him. Taking as much effort as he could muster to ignore his prime directive. He could feel the way your heart skipped a beat the moment he put both hands firmly on either shoulder. Bringing you forward to plant a gentle kiss on your forehead, the fire he'd felt in his chest before slowly smouldering back to life as he took a step back and tried not to betray the fear that churned at his stomach.

“Rest. I will come back soon.” He turned back the way you had come. Leaving you flustered and confused on the dirtridden path.

[troublemakerfiction]

18.

Amilia “Millz”

“Is it just me or do I sense a lot of negative energy?” I asked Darnell before snickering.

If I had a dollar for every dirty look I got tonight I would be richer than what I already am. These bitches were mad as fuck and it had me laughing because they came here knowing this was my party. Darnell had flyers and shit made, had the shit on Facebook and Instagram that this was my welcome home party so anybody that’s here knows this night is dedicated to me. Why the fuck is you here if I bother you so much? Haters are funny as hell, can’t stand my ass but had to come out to see me. Shit is weird.

“Nah I feel it too. This is sad Millz, this many people shouldn’t dislike you.”

“They don’t, they’re jealous of me. It’s a big difference; they think I’m going to take their niggas or something.” One would think I had a reputation of being a hoe with how bothered these bitches act.

I’ve never been anybody’s side chick; I’ve never fucked or stole anybody’s man but if I wanted to I could. I know it, their niggas know it and they know it too which is why they can’t stand my ass. If I wasn’t so tickled by the hate I would make it known to these bitches that they had nothing to worry about. The last thing I want to do is share a nigga so I’m the least of their concerns. I don’t want dick that’s already taken by the next bitch.

“She can’t help it if these hoes are insecure. Let them hate, they can’t beat her so fuck it.” Imani said before shrugging.

“I love the grown up Imani so much.” I chuckled. Imani has changed so much and I love every bit of it. Long gone was the girl who let people talk to her any type of way. If you come at her be prepared to get told the fuck off or hit if you push it. I give the credit to NuNu and Kason in all honesty, they brought out a different side of her and I was here for it. My baby cousin wasn’t a baby anymore and I was so proud of the woman she was becoming. She wasn’t playing with these hoes out here.

“True but she has no friends.” Darnell said making me laugh.

“What happened to that one girl, what was her name again? Is it Raina or something like that?” NuNu asked me.

“Her name is Raven and she can kiss my ass. As soon as I moved she tried to fuck Cameron thinking he wasn’t going to let me know.” I answered her.

About a month after I made the move to Virginia, Cameron called me one night telling me about how Raven called him over to her house claiming she had some things that belonged to me. When he got there bitch had on lingerie and tried to fuck him but he turned her ass down. I wish I could say I was shocked but I wasn’t. Raven is a ho, she’s always been a ho. I just never thought she would cross me but fuck it, people fuck up and do shit like that. I called her and cussed her ass out and I haven’t spoken to her since. Last time I heard anything about her was from Facebook. Funniest thing is she’s supposedly best friends with that bitch Bianca. From what I heard she’s even the God mother to Bianca’s daughter.

I wasn’t even mad when I found out about that shit, I actually found it funny. That shit didn’t do anything but make me realize I’m right when I keep bitches at a distance. They’re all fake as fuck: if you’re not my family I’m not fuckin’ with you like that.

“Damn, that’s fucked up. You didn’t slap her?”

“I haven’t seen her. I’m not about to go looking for the hoe but I’ll see her at some point. Fuck that though, we’re about to turn up.” I grabbed an unopened bottle of Rose then stood up. “Who the hell are all of these people, I don’t even know them.” I asked Darnell looking around the section.

“Vick invited people from the shop. You’re good with that?”

“Yeah it’s fine; as long as they don’t bother me we’re good.”

“There goes Dro. He is so damn fine,” Imani said and I looked at her with my eyebrow raised.

“Let Kason hear you say that.”

“He won’t that’s why I said it over here.”

“Mhm yeah you better keep it down. Who the hell is Dro anyway?”

“He’s the one talking to Vick.” NuNu pointed over at Vick and the rest of the guys. “The one with the beard and white shirt.” When my eyes landed on who she was talking about I had to make myself turn my head so I wouldn’t stare at him. This Dro nigga is fine as shit; the same height as Vick, I couldn’t tell what his complexion was but I know he wasn’t chocolate and he wasn’t light bright. He looked to be somewhere in the middle. Through the shirt he was wearing I could tell the nigga probably spent a good amount of time in the gym.

“Damn, where the fuck was he at four years ago?”

“In New York,” Darnell laughed at me. “He moved here not too long after you left; got hooked up with Vick and them now he works at the shop doing tattoos and he handles things from time to time if you get me.”

“I got you,” I nodded. I knew exactly what that meant, this nigga killed people for the cartel. “Well he looks damn good from over here. I’m about to go see if he looks that good up close.” I gave them a smile before walking over to where he and Vick were standing.  “Hey,” I poked Vick’s arm and both of them looked at me.

“Damn,” Dro said while looking me up and down. I chuckled at his outburst, nigga has no shame. I like it.

“Aye nigga chill, this is my cousin.” Vick told him.

“Oh so this is Millz? I heard a lot about you ma, it’s nice to put a face with a name.” He smirked at me then held his hand out. “I’m Dro,”

“Nice to meet you too,” I smiled shaking his hand. Standing right by him I could smell the cologne coming off of him and the shit had my knees ready to go weak. It’s nothing better than a man who smells as good as he looks.

“You know what; I’m going to walk away because I’m not here this awkward shit.” Vick shook his head then walked off.

“I’m not even going to bite my tongue, you’re rocking the fuck outta that dress.” Dro told me.

“Thank you.” I popped the bottle of Rose I was holding open then took a swig while he watched me licking his lips. I couldn’t help but find it funny and a little bit intriguing. I’ve never had a nigga be so forward before right off the bat. Usually they play nice and innocent on some I wanna be your friend shit, then try to go in for the kill and fail every time.

“You might as well take a picture of me so you can get your rocks off or something because you’re staring mighty hard right now.”  I said making him chuckle.

“Do you always say the first thing that comes to your mind?”

“Uh, yeah pretty much. No need in biting my tongue when I really don’t give a fuck.” I shrugged then walked off. I knew it seemed rude but i did that to confuse his ass. If he’s smart he’ll be looking for me. After walking away from him I went over to where Haze was so I could get a blunt from him. If anybody had something it was him. When I got to him I was happy to see Lock sitting right next to him. Good, I could kill two birds with one stone.

“Yo, Haze let me get a blunt.” I shook his shoulder making sure he was looking at me.

“Fuck makes you think I got a blunt for you?” He smiled at me.

“I know you my nigga that’s why. For real let me get a blunt Oh and Lock I’m happy to see you too, let me see your keys.”

“My keys?” Lock looked at me like I was crazy. “Fuck you need my keys for?”

“I want to smoke and I’m going to go in your office. I damn sure wasn’t about to smoke outside so a dumb ass cop can get stupid. I really don’t feel like turning into a black lives matter moment, so let me get your keys.”

“Yo what the fuck?” He laughed at me; I don’t even know what was funny. I was dead ass serious. An attitude like mine doesn’t mix well with NYPD.

“Come on I’m dead ass and don’t tell me to smoke in here. It’s too many aye let pass that ass niggas around.”

“I can’t take you Millz, glad to have you baby girl.” He went in his pocket and gave me his office keys.

“Thank you, I missed your black ass too. Haze, blunt please. Stop playing.” Shaking his head he went in his pocket and gave me a Bluntville pack.

“Here get out my face,”

“Love you too.” I blew them a kiss then made my way up to Lock’s office. Once I got inside I shut the door then sat in the chair behind his desk sitting everything I had in my arms on top it. I sat there rolling myself a blunt just getting lost in my thoughts.

Here I was at this welcome home party in a city that has pretty much fucked me over for the most part. Somebody had my father killed and I have no idea who. After the situation with my mother it really had me thinking about everything that happened. I couldn’t help but feel like I was stuck in an episode of Power. The night my father was murdered those niggas left with nothing but the fact that they got my dad and uncle out of the picture. Yeah that’s some big shit considering who they were but they really didn’t get shit done because the business kept going and has never slowed down.

That tells me whoever was behind my father’s murder had to be after something else. Why would getting him out the way be so important if it didn’t shut down his business? I vividly remember them looking for my money and demanding money from my dad. I also remember my father getting my prepared for that shit to happen.

This man came in my room three o’clock in the morning to show me this room and what to do once I was in.

Winter 2006

“Amil get up,” I heard my dad say before feeling him shake my shoulder. “Get up, right now.” He pulled the covers off me then went and turned my light on.

Sucking my teeth I sat up then looked at my alarm clock that red 3:12 A.M. “It’s 3 in the morning, what are you doing?”

“Don’t question me aight, just get up and come on.” I climbed off my bed then stretched.

“Where are we going? Where’s mama?”

“I don’t know and I don’t give a fuck. Don’t tell her about what I’m showing you alright. She doesn’t know and she’s not going to know.”

“Why not?”

“Didn’t I just say don’t question me? Come on.” We walked down the hall from my room to a book case. He lifted the thermostat that was right next to it and punched in a code.

After putting in the last number the book case split revealing a room that was set up like a little den. It had a refrigerator and a couch. On one side of the room there were multiple screens on the wall showing every room in our house. The only rooms that didn’t have cameras were my bedroom and bathroom. There was a camera showing the outside of my windows I figured must be so he could see if somebody was climbing in my window.

“What the hell is this? Fort Knox?”

“Watch your mouth.”

“For real though what is this and why are you showing this to me right now?”

“This is a panic room; I had it built in here for you. Sit down because we need to talk.” I sat on the couch while he put in a code on the keypad that made the case close. He came over and sat next to me. “What do you think I do for a living Amil? Don’t worry about getting in trouble or anything else. What do you think I do for a living?”

I looked in his eyes to see if he was serious and he was. My dad has never had a conversation with me about what he does for a living. Anytime anybody ever asked me what he did I just said he owned a business. I never got specific; I always gave them that simple answer. For me I didn’t feel like what he does for a living was any of their business. If my dad isn’t talking to me about it why would I go and take that to somebody else?

As far as for what I thought he did, I’m not dumb I know he sells drugs. I figured that out when I was eight years old. One day I was outside the projects I lived in with my mother and I heard some niggas talking about him. They were calling him Dice, the only reason I knew it was him is because they said Dice is Keisha’s baby daddy. My mama is Keisha and I’m her only child so duh, they were talking about him.

Anyway, they were saying how he had the city on lock, talking about how people feared him. Add that to the fact that my dad had a lot of money, was always at work but I’ve never heard him say what his job was and where. He would just he’s going to work or he was going to handle something. I watched all those movies like State Property, Paid in Full, Belly, and my dad and his brothers had a lot in common with some of those characters and the shit they did.

“You sell drugs.”

“That’s what you think?”

“Yes,”

“Well baby girl you’re right, that’s what I do for a living. I do it because our family needed money and that’s what got it for me. In doing this shit I make a lot of enemies and some of those enemies will try to go for things that are close to me.”

“Are you trying to say somebody is after me?”

“No, what I’m saying is if anything were to happen to me I don’t want you stuck in the crossfire. I want you to get up come to this room and wait until shit is done and over with.”

“Dad I’m confused, are you saying something is going to happen to you?”

“There’s a possibility that it could. Don’t start crying,” He wiped the tears that fell down my face. “I know you don’t want to hear this shit and trust me I hate talking to you about it but I have to be honest with you.”

“I still don’t get it though, you come and tell me this out of nowhere. What the hell?”’

“There was never going to be a right time Amil but you have to know this because I don’t want anything happening to you. Now dry your eyes and get up so I can tell you everything you need to know about saving your life.” I wiped my face then stood up.

That night he told me to pack a bag of clothes, gave me the code to both key pads then told me where there would be a set of keys in the chimney downstairs. He bought an old used car and parked it in the garage. He wanted me to get the keys from the chimney then leave as fast as possible and get to one of my uncles.

 I was only 15 so I didn’t have a license but my dad started teaching me how to drive when I was 13 so driving wasn’t an issue for me. When he was telling me and teaching me all of that it never dawned on me that I would need all of that shit a couple of weeks later.

Being back up here was a bittersweet thing. I love it because my family is here and it’s home for me but it’s bitter because I’ve experienced every painful part of my life here. I was determined to not let that hurt hold me back. My father is gone, my mother and that bitch boy she put me out for is gone too. I’m ready to move the fuck on and just live my life the best that I could. My focus is on my kids and my business. Anything extra is going to be put on the back burner.

“You good?” A voice knocked me from my thoughts making me jump a little bit. Looking up I sucked my teeth when I saw Trouble standing there.

“Yeah I’m fine, what are you doing in here?”

“I saw you come up here so I wanted to see what’s up with you. You igged my ass when you came in.”

“That was for a reason. You don’t even need to be up here, you got your bitch with you and I will really hurt that bitch if she comes at me. So please, just leave me alone.”

“This is different. If I recall this isn’t the first time you had a problem with a girlfriend of mine. When it was Bianca you never stopped talking to me.”

“Yeah well I didn’t care about fighting every other day back then. I have children now; I don’t have time to be out here fighting over stupid shit which is what’s going to happen if your girl comes at me. So I’m going to say it again. Please leave.”

“Aight man, what the fuck is your problem Millz?” He barked at me.

“Excuse me?”

“You heard me, what the fuck is your issue? Even before that Thanksgiving shit with Nicki you were giving me the cold shoulder like I did something to you.”

“Nigga you did.”

“Oh really what the fuck did I do to you? Last time I checked you told me to be with Nicki and you’re the one who moved away. The fuck did I do?”

“I did tell you that and you know damn well I didn’t fuckin’ mean it but you went and did it anyway. That was partly my fault, I can admit that. You need to take responsibility for what the fuck you did too though. You don’t want to be with that bitch you were just mad and did that bullshit because you were in your feelings and you knew it would get to me. You got what you wanted; it did get to me so now it’s fuck you.”

“Fuck me?”

“Yes, fuck you nigga fuck you; understand that? I don’t feel like dealing with the bullshit Trouble and that’s what comes with being with you. If it’s not Bianca it’s this bitch, it’s always going to be somebody. You’re no fuckin’ different from my baby father. For all that I might as well be with the nigga that knocked my ass up.”

“Your problems with Bianca don’t have shit to do with me though. Y’all would’ve had beef anyway because she got a baby by the same nigga you got kids by. That’s not my problem; the bitch was cheating on me. I never cheated on her so how the fuck am I anything like that nigga?”

“You play game just like he does. We were not together so if you wanted to fuck with shorty you had the right to do that but my question is and always been why didn’t you tell me about her? You felt the need to explain who the fuck I was to her but I couldn’t get the same respect, why?”

“It wasn’t even like that for real. I didn’t go out of my way to not tell you.”

“I can’t tell; I went from seeing you every day to only talking to you through test messages which is crazy because I was living in your house. You were avoiding me because you were fuckin’ with her then because I said something while I was in my feelings you went in jumped into a relationship with her right after you said it was nothing like that. You move funny my nigga.”

“I move funny?” He asked with a chuckle.

“Yes you move funny; I should’ve realized that when you were chasing my ass all the while you had a damn girlfriend. I don’t care about how much you really didn’t want to be with her, the fact of the matter was you were claiming her. Like I said, you move funny.”

“Millz we both played a part in shit aight; it wasn’t only on me and it wasn’t just on you. We both did some stupid shit. Just like I didn’t have to get with Nicki you didn’t have to tell me to do the shit ten times either if you didn’t mean it.”

“It doesn’t even matter Trouble. You’re with her now and I don’t want any parts in the drama that will come out of even thinking about going and doing something with you. I’m good on that. If you want to be cool and cordial fine we can do that but don’t come at me any type of way. Don’t be staring at me and shit, none of that. Treat me the same way you treat Darnell and Imani.”

He looked at skeptically for a second then nodded his head. “That’s cool with me.”

“Good. Now are you done in here?”

“Nah I have one more question.”

“What Trouble?”

“Have you been to see your mother?”

“Nope; I don’t plan on going and I don’t feel like talking about that.” I answered him keeping my answer pretty damn short. I’ve never went to go visit my mother’s grave and I’m never going to go. The only reason she was even buried is because I allowed her to be buried.

After my uncle ended her life they dumped her body somewhere and she was found a couple of weeks later. Of course when it came down to the police I had to put on the sad devastated daughter role and act like I gave a fuck and was shocked. I wanted to cremate her ass and toss her ashes somewhere but there are people from her family that cared about her so they could have that grave shit. I wasn’t going out to see that bitch and if I did I would probably spit on her tombstone so it’s best if I keep my distance.

After handling all of her funeral shit I ended up getting in touch with my father’s old attorney and got all my money. Well the shit she couldn’t touch and get rid of. I ended up getting almost $3,000,000 dollars of my father’s money and $20,000 from my mother’s life insurance policy. That I just gave to my maternal grandmother so she wouldn’t be calling me asking me for a damn thing.

Besides Shante I wasn’t in touch with any of my mother’s family because my father didn’t want me around them. Even after he died they didn’t make an effort to reach out to me so fuck them. Anything to do with my mother was a closed chapter in a book I wasn’t reading from anymore. The shit was over and done with, I don’t even like thinking about the shit.

“Alright I just wanted to know where your head was at pertaining to that situation.”

“It’s nowhere because that whole situation is irrelevant.”

“Alright, well I’m about to get out of here before Nicki starts trippin’. I’ll see you around Millz.”

“I’m sure you will.” He smirked at me then walked out of the office. I was about to roll another blunt since Trouble came in here blowing my buzz. As I was breaking the weed down there was another knock on the door.

“Damn, niggas really annoying today. What! “I shouted. The door opened and Dro walked in then closed it behind him. “I don’t remember saying come in.”

“You didn’t have to; I just wanted to see what you were doing.”

“Alright, well you see what I’m doing. Do you have any more questions” I eyed him with a smirk on my face. Dro is fine as hell and it’s that grown man fine. He’s not a little ass boy and he had this ruggedness about him that had me intrigued.

“What’s the deal with you and Trouble? Y’all fuck around?”

Instead of answering him right away I just started laughing because that was funny as shit to me. This nigga really asked me that out the blue without a fuck; I love it. “How is that your business?”

“It’s not but I like to know what I’m getting myself into.”

“Oh and what would you be getting into because all of this,” I pointed to myself, “is of limits.”

“You have a man?”

“No I don’t have a man, and I don’t fuck with Trouble. Is that all you needed to know?”

“What’s the deal with your baby father?”

“Alright you’re getting too personal, I barely know you. How about this, don’t worry about my business because it doesn’t concern you my nigga.”

“You’re taking all of this wrong.”

“No I think I’m taking it right. You’re too much in my business and right now you’re really blowing my shit so if you could leave.” I told him before turning my eyes towards the large windows around the office that gave of complete view of the club.

I was about to turn my head and focus on my blunt when Darnell looking as if she was yelling at somebody caught my eyes. I dropped everything in my hands and walked over to the window to get a second look. When I saw her arguing with Raven I snatched Lock’s keys and headed towards the door.

“Let’s go I need to lock this door, don’t say shit to me just get out.” I said to Dro.

Chuckling he shook his head and walked out the office. I don’t know what the fuck was funny; I see he got that ass out. I locked the office door then made my way downstairs to the main floor and was about to head towards the section when I saw a crowd of people rushing towards the exit. Quickly I glanced around to see if I saw my cousins but I didn’t. Not seeing any of them let me know exactly what was going on. Darnell was outside about to kill this bitch.

Imani

“You ready for graduation?” NuNu asked me while we sat in Kason’s car smoking a blunt.

I remember a time when I wouldn’t even touch a blunt; all of that went out the window after the first time Kason finally got me to try smoking with him. I started out smoking every once in the blue moon to smoking on the regular basis when NuNu and I moved into our own apartment. My brother would either leave weed at the house or she would just take some from his place when she spent the night there. Between her and Kason’s pothead ass I got caught up in it. Smoking has become a big part of my daily routine.

“Hell yeah, I don’t want anything but fun the next two months. I already know when school starts all my fun is going to come to a stop.”

NuNu and I were both about to graduate from Saint Peters and I couldn’t be happy to be free from school. The only thing is that freedom isn’t going to last long because I’m starting Robert Wood Johnson Medical School in Piscataway, New Jersey in July. In August NuNu is going to be starting at Seton Hall University School of Law in Newark.

“You’re right about that and I told Haze that shit too. I’m not staying in the house I’m going nuts this whole summer so he better prepare himself to see my ass in a club every weekend.”

“Yeah we’ll see how he takes that shit.”

“I don’t give a damn how he takes I’m doing what I want. I’m nervous about law school though.”

“Why?”

“I’m not exactly the law school type. I mean college was one thing but I don’t know if I’m going to be a good fit at Seton Hall.”

“You’re going to do fine, it’s not like you’re on some extra shit. You’re just out spoken; it’s nothing wrong with it. At least you know exactly what you’re going to do I don’t even know what I want to specialize in yet.” NuNu had her mind made up about becoming a criminal lawyer, she already knew she was going to take the bar exam in New York and New Jersey.  

I am nowhere near prepared for what I want to do. Initially I wanted to be a pediatrician and work with kids but my step-mother got me hooked on Grey’s Anatomy and now I was strongly considering becoming a surgeon. I know it sounds petty to pick your career because of a TV show but oh well. I’m just happy I have two years of school to go through before I had to worry about choosing my specialty.

“I know but it’s still nerve wrecking. I’m excited though too, I’m going to be a fuckin’ lawyer. Noelle Hernandez, Esquire. I like the way that sounds.” She cheesed.

“It might be Noelle Diamond if my brother acts right.”

“Oh please I’m not thinking about marriage right now and neither is he. My focus is school and my career, the nigga is lucky he’s my boyfriend. What about you and Kason? If anything y’all are headed down the aisle soon.”

“No we’re not; I want to finish school too. Maybe after medical school but right now I’m not thinking about it that. Same damn reason I told him no when he asked me to move in and why I won’t be moving in any time soon.”

“Does he know that? I heard him tell Haze and them you were moving in with him.”

“When was this?”

“On Wednesday, you know they play cards at Haze’s house every week.”

“I don’t know why he told them that because I told him no when he asked me. I told him no three times actually.”

A couple of months ago Kason asked me to move in with him and I instantly said no. I didn’t say I would think about it or anything like that, I made sure he understood it wasn’t happening. He asked me two more times after that the last time being two weeks ago and again I told him no. I don’t know why he’s telling his friends and my family I’m moving in because I’m not.

“Well he feels like your ass is moving in.”

“I’m not so I hope he doesn’t get his hopes too high because that’s not going down.”

“Why don’t you want to live with him though?”

“I like having my own space. I’m damn near alone, you’re always at my brother’s house. Move in already bitch.”

“About that,” She smiled at me. “I was going to tell you at our graduation party, Haze asked me to move in with him and I said yeah.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, you’re not mad are you?”

“Nope, your room is about to become my second closet. Why were you going to wait? I wasn’t going to be mad or anything.”

“I know you weren’t, I was going to have it be a surprise because we’re moving into a new house. I wasn’t going to leave my apartment to move into his condo, that’s dumb.”

“So y’all are getting a house together?”

“Yeah, we found a house in Elizabeth. Millz moved her ass back up here right on time, I’ll tell you that much.”

“Well I’m happy for y’all, and I hope y’all stay happy with living together but I’m not on that wave yet. I like how things are right now and I’m not trying to change that for anybody.”

“I feel you, y’all will figure it ou-oh shit is that Darnell fighting?” NuNu pointed out her window and over to the entrance of the club. I looked over and it was Darnell out there literally dog walking some girl in the middle of the street.

“That is her, what the fuck is going on?” We made sure the blunt was put out then we got out the car and ran across the street just as Xavier, Vick and Trouble were breaking up the fight. “What the fuck happened Darnell?” I asked once I got over to where she was. Xavier had her arms pinned down to her side and had just got finished yelling for her to calm down.

“Xavier let my arms go I’m not going to touch the bitch again damn!” Darnell snapped at him.

“I got her X, don’t worry about it.” I grabbed Darnell’s arm and pulled her to the side while the guys tried to make the crowd that followed them outside disperse.

“What the fuck happened D?”

“We were in the section and Raven got in and walked up talking about she came here to see Millz but I told her to get out. The bitch felt Froggy and spit at me so I fucked her up. I dragged that hoe from inside the club to out here.”

“What the fuck is she looking for Millz for? That’s going to be an ass whooping for her. The fuck is the point?” I asked nobody in particular. It was more of a rhetorical question if anything. “They better get her the fuck out of here before Millz comes out and sees her here.”

“They made the bitch leave,” NuNu walked up and said just as Millz was coming out the club looking around.

“Millz!” Darnell shouted her name getting her attention. When she got over to us she had a confused look on her face.

“What the fuck just happened?”

“Raven’s hoe ass spit at me so she got drug. The bitch is lucky I didn’t have my razor on me, whole face would’ve been sliced up. I’m at Nicki’s head too.”

“Why? What did she do?” Millz asked.

“She tried to hit me while I was fighting Raven, I saw her ass and I’m stinging that bitch on sight.”

“Why would she swing on you? That bitch really doesn’t give a fuck about her life at all.” Millz shook her head. “This is why I didn’t want a damn party; I knew some bullshit was going to happen. Are we done here? I’m ready to go home.”

“Where are you staying at Millz?” I questioned.

“I’m back in Jersey City, I’m downtown though. You know where Windsor Liberty Houses are?” She asked talking about a luxury apartment complex that was literally a few blocks away from my apartment building.

“You’re like ten minutes away from me if that much. NuNu and I have an apartment at Liberty Towers. That’s crazy.”

“No what’s crazy is you having an apartment there, damn. You know how much they charge for people to live there?”

“Well my dad doesn’t have a problem paying it as long as my ass stays in school. Your rent isn’t cheap either. I’m surprised you even moved in Jersey City period.”

“I know right. My father busted his ass to get out of there and here I am going back. I’m not worried about the money though because I don’t pay the rent so whatever.”

“So who pays it?” NuNu asked her. Before she could even say it I knew exactly what was about to come out her mouth.

“Hold up, Prophet paying for it?” I questioned and she chuckled. “I knew it; doesn’t his ass live there too?”

“Alright he is paying it but that was his choice to do that. He does live around there too but he’s way on the other side and he’s giving me my space.”

“Mhm he wants you there so he can watch that ass.”

“Cameron has a girlfriend so he better not be watching anything over here.”

“He has a what?” Darnell looked at her shocked. I was shocked too because I didn’t hear shit about Prophet having a girlfriend. Being that he lives so close I see him from time to time but it’s never been with a bitch he wasn’t selling so I was shocked too.

“He has a girlfriend, and yes I met her before. He brought her down to Virginia a couple of times so yes she’s met Dyce and Darius. No I don’t have a problem with the chick. She’s in grad school, owns her own business and she’s nice as hell. Too nice for that nigga but that’s between them.”

“You’re alright with her being around your kids? Damn, you really have grown up.” I told her. Moving to Virginia must’ve really changed my cousin because had this been three years ago she would’ve slapped Prophet for even thinking about bringing a girl around her.

“Things and people change besides he’s no longer mine so I can’t be mad. I left his ass; somebody was going to pick him up at some point. I just need to go the hell home. I don’t feel like riding with you Darnell because I already know Xavier is going to be on your ass for fighting anyway.”

“You can ride with me and Kason since you’re so close to me. This one,” I pointed to NuNu, “is riding with Haze and going with him so we have room.”

“I’m ready to go now so go get Kason’s black Jesus looking ass and let’s go.” I waved her off but walked away to find Kason. I walked around for ten minutes looking for him then finally found him mixed in the crowd outside talking to some girl. Initially I didn’t think much of it because I know he’s not stupid enough to try me, especially not in public but when I saw the barely there outfit the girl had on and her hands on his arms along with the big kool-aid smile on her face I walked over and tapped his shoulder.

When he looked behind him and saw me he smirked then kissed me on the lips. “What’s up ma? You ready to go?”

“Mhm we have to drop Millz off before we get to my place. Who is this?”

“I’m Heaven, we grew up together.” The girl answered me before he could. I looked at him with an eyebrow raised because now that’s she’s said her name I know exactly who she was. Heaven is a girl he’s known since grammar school and they were best friends until they lost their virginity to each other and started dating. It didn’t work out because he cheated on her and they broke up during high school.

“Oh so you’re Heaven, okay.” I nodded my head.

“Yeah that’s me, you must be his girlfriend Emily?” She asked with a smile on her face. I laughed because I knew she got my name wrong on person.

“Imani, but I’m sure you knew that. Kason we need to go.” I said keeping my eyes on him. Without saying a word I dared him to take his time and say bye to her ass.

“Aight come on,” He grabbed my hand and started to walk off but Heaven grabbed his arm.

“I can’t get a see you later or anything?” She asked him.

“No because you won’t be seeing him later. You can let him go though.” I told her before he could say anything.

“I don’t believe I was talking to you.”

“No you weren’t but I was talking to you. Thank you,”

“Chill,” Kason told me before snatching his arm from her grasp. “Come on,” When we walked off he squeezed my hand and looked at me. “What I tell you about sweating these bitches?”

“I’m not sweating a damn thing, but I didn’t like her being all over you; smiling hard as hell showing all 32 of her teeth.” I rolled my eyes.  “Why were y’all even talking?”

“She came over to me and started running her mouth. Not too much was being talked about anyway. Don’t worry about it aight.”

“Uh huh, I better not have to worry about it. I don’t like the drama stuff Kason you know that,”

“I do and you know I’m not about to fuck around on you so relax.”

We found Millz and everybody else and said our byes before leaving. After dropping Millz off at her place we went to mine.

“Hey Henry,” I waved at the concierge that worked the front desk at night before heading to the elevators with Kason right behind me. When we got up to my apartment I went straight to the bathroom and took a shower before joining Kason in the living room.

“So you’re not trying to move in with me for real huh?’ He asked as soon as I sat down.

“Where did that come from?”

“I know NuNu told you what I said at your brother’s house. Don’t try and act like she didn’t.”

“Alright she did and now that you bring it up, why did you tell them that?”

“What’s the big deal about us living together?”

“It’s no big deal you just make it one. I don’t want to live with you yet. I don’t think I’m ready for that step.”

“We’ve been together four years Imani. You’re acting like I just met you last month or something.”

“I need all my focus to be on school. I can’t do that with you living with me.”

“So you want me to wait four years to live with my woman?” He shook his head chuckling. “You got me fucked up.”

“What is the big damn deal about us living together? We’re young as shit, I’m 21 you’re 22, why do we need to live together?”

“I don’t care how old we are, you’re my woman right?”

“Ka-“

“Nah fuck that shit, you’re my woman right?”

“Yes,”

“Alright then, I want to be able to come home and see you there all the damn time. You think I’m about to wait four years for you to graduate for us to move in together?”

“What’s the rush?’

“There is no rush but I’m not about to be doing sleepovers with my girl all the  time. So you need to figure out if you want to move in with me, if I’m moving in here with you or are we looking for a whole new place because this separate shit isn’t going on for too much longer.” He got up and walked towards my bedroom leaving me on the couch by myself. I rolled my eyes but didn’t even go after him because he was irritating me.

I love Kason with all my heart and I know he loves me too but he wanted too much too quick in my eyes. Us living together wouldn’t do shit but complicate things and I don’t want that. Plus I like having my own space especially when he pisses me off. If we get into it, which is rare I can just leave and come home to calm down. If we’re living together there is no escape and that type of things builds resentment.  The last thing I wanted to do was be in a dead ass relationship and start to hate his ass because I’m around him too much. He’s not trying to hear that shit though, he wants us together damn near all the time.

I know I probably sound like a big ass baby whining about my fine ass faithful and paid boyfriend wanting to make things even more official between us but I wasn’t ready for that live in relationship thing yet. It freaks me out and it scares the shit out of me. I don’t want him to get sick of me and go looking for something else in the next bitch.

***

“You gotta quit being scary.” Millz told me while she moved around her living room. I was at her apartment chillin’ with her waiting on Prophet to drop the boys off. It’s been a few months since I’ve seen my little cousins and I couldn’t wait until their bad asses walked in here “I thought you grew out of that when you started cursing like a damn sailor and got a weave.”

“Fuck you,”

“See,” She busted out laughing like what she said was so funny. “I’m sorry but you have changed. Look at you. You always showed off the body a little but damn.” I looked down at my outfit and smiled.

A lot has changed about me over the years. My style choices were way more adult than they used to be plus my attitude has changed a whole hell of a lot. I wasn’t scared to speak my mind anymore and even though I still didn’t fight I knew how to. Kason had my ass in the gym teaching me how to box for a year straight. The only reason he didn’t still have my ass in the gym was I refused to go. Learning how to defend myself was one thing but this nigga was trying to train me like I was in the military and I got sick of it.

“Shut up and I’m not scary I just don’t want us moving too fast.”

“Y’all been together for four years, the fuck do you call fast Imani?” She laughed at me. “Listen, I was where you are before. Cameron wanted me to move in and I never did.”

“Alright so why are you not understanding?”

“I didn’t want to move in because I knew what it was with that nigga. I knew we weren’t going to last so there was no point. You on the other hand have a good man. Kason loves your ass and he wants to be with you. Cameron just wanted me with him so he could monitor what I was doing and mind my business. There is a big difference.”

“I get what you’re saying but still.”

“Still my ass, just think about it some more. He’s not going to get sick of you if he hasn’t already. Hell, you made the nigga wait damn near two years to pop that damn cherry, if he was going to bonk out on you he would’ve been did it.”

“Whatever I’ll think about it. On to you, now that you’re back what do you have planned?”

“Working on my business and raising my kids. That’s about it, what else is there to do?”

“I don’t know, you don’t have any boos or anything?”

“Nah,” She shook her head. “I’m not really too beat for niggas right now.”

“What about Dro? I saw y’all talking at your party.”

“That nigga is an insecure piece of work, I can already tell. The night of my party he was questioning me about other niggas and I don’t have time for that shit.” I was about to ask her what she meant but there was knocking on her door so she walked to the door and opened it. As soon as she did Dyce and Darius came running in.

“Mani!” Darius shouted when he saw me then came running towards me. I got up and hugged him then looked at Dyce who looked like he had an attitude.

“What’s wrong with him?”

“He in trouble.” Darius answered me.

“Dyce!” Millz shouted coming in the living room. “So you go out to eat and can’t act right?” She asked him but he said nothing. “I know you hear me.” Instead of answering her he sucked his teeth then shrugged his shoulders. “I know you didn’t just, hell no.” She went over and grabbed him by his shirt making him go upstairs. I already knew she was about to whoop his ass. Dyce is like a little reincarnation of my uncle, it’s actually kind of scary, he doesn’t give a fuck about anything and he’s only three.

“That little nigga is bad.” I heard Prophet say before he finally came walking in the living room. “What’s up Imani.”

“Hey Prophet; what did he do?”

“I took them to that Hibachi buffet place down 440 to eat and instead of sitting down and eating his food he picked his plate up and threw the shit across the room because I told him he had to wait to get ice cream.”

“Damn, why didn’t you get his ass then?’

“I did, that’s why he had an attitude but he knows not to do that shit with his mother. He just didn’t give a fuck now he’s up there getting that ass whooped.” Prophet chuckled. “D.Caine, I’ll see y’all next weekend aight.” He kissed Darius’ forehead then left.

“So you’re the good one?” I asked Darius.

“Yup.” He smiled at me.

“Mhm either that or you’re the sneaky one.” I chuckled at him. “Take your jacket and stuff off then put it up.” He went and did what I said before going upstairs to his room. When Millz finally came back downstairs she looked pissed off.

“So motherhood isn’t so easy is it?” I laughed at her.

“Shut up Imani, that little boy is too damn much.”

“What did you do to him? I know you’re not using belts yet.”

“No but I pop the shit out of that hand them legs though. I don’t play with those little boys, as soon as their asses turn eight it’s straight body shots. Fuck that belt shit.”

“Why did Prophet call Darius D.Caine?”

“That’s his name.”

“Prophet’s last name is Caine?”

“No nigga, his last name is Thomas. Darius has Cam’s father’s name. Darius Caine Thomas and Dyce Cameron Thomas. He wasn’t about to let me just name them after my dad, he had to throw himself in there. Like the last name isn’t enough.”

“So he calls Dyce D.Cameron?”

“D.Cam,” she shrugged. “That’s their thing I don’t judge it. Forget that though, are you going to move in with Kason or not?”

“I could’ve sworn I told you I would think about it so that’s what I’m doing. Thinking about it.”

“You just better make the right decision. I’m not saying give in and just give him what he wants if it means you’re going to be miserable but don’t hold back because you’re scared he’s going to get sick of you. Are you sure that’s the reason and it’s not about Uncle Nasir cutting you off?”

“Why would he cut me off?”

“He may not cut you off but he won’t be paying rent for you to be living with a grown ass man. Is that what you’re so hesitant about? Kason is far from broke he can afford to get y’all a place.”

“I know that but my dad really has nothing to do with it. Anyway, I’m about to go pick him up anyway and make him go get a haircut.”

“Where’s his car?”

“Parked outside, I drove his car over here. Mine was on some bullshit and he was knocked out so” I shrugged. “ I was going to spend some time with the look alikes but Dyce is in his bad mode and I don’t have time right now.” I got up and grabbed my purse from the floor. “You’re coming to my graduation party right?”

“Depends on what kind of party it’s going to be.”

“Small and at my parents’ house, it’s mostly going to be family and a few friends. And I do mean a few because I don’t have many.”

“Alright, I’ll be there. I already know Trouble’s pet isn’t invited right. I’m already at her for sneaking Darnell so you might not want to have her around.”

“I’m not trying to have you or Darnell get arrested for killing the girl so no, she’s not invited.” I gave Millz a hug then made my way to her front door. “Love you cousin.”

“I know; I love you too. We live up the street from each other I better see you often little girl.”

“Don’t be sweating me now that I’m grown Millz.”

“Oh shut up and get out.” We both laughed then hugged each other one more time before I left. As soon as I got in Kason’s car my phone rang and I knew by the ringtone it was him so I answered. “Hello?”

“Where you at with my damn car?” He asked sounding irritated.

“I just left Millz’ house I’m on my way back there. I hope you’re dressed because you need a haircut and your hair retwisted. I’m tired of staring at your naps, you’re getting that stuff done today.”

“How are you just going to tell me what I’m going to do? Besides my hair is all natural, you’re supposed to love that shit. It’s all me baby.”

“Yes and I love you but there is a difference between embracing natural hair and looking dusty. You need them done, we’re going to Rama’s and your hair is getting done.”

“You lucky I actually need my shit done, but nah I’m not dressed. I’m waiting on you.”

“Why are you waiting on me Kay?”

“It doesn’t make sense to shower and get dressed twice. If you’re about to have my ass in a damn shop for hours getting this shit done I’m getting some pussy before we go fuck you mean.”

“Damn, you can’t ask?”

“Did you ask me if I was getting my shit done? No, so I’m not asking shit. When I’m done with you, you’re going to need a shop next. I’m fuckin’ all that shit up.”

“You’re not about to fuck my damn hair up.”

“I paid for the shit to get done I can fuck it up if I want to. Bring your ass on, no talking no getting smart. As soon as you get in the door strip and come sit on daddy’s dick aight.” I couldn’t even respond because the nigga hung up on me. Usually I would’ve been mad about him doing that shit but I’ll let it slide this time. Daddy was getting his way this one time.