#conversations // emmeline and seba

[sebcastillo]

@emmelinefm

LOCATION: outside the infirmary

SEBASTIAN KNEW THAT SOME questioned his sympathy for the woman. and yet, those that were closest to him knew better than to ask questions. he just wanted to help. he remembered when he had first arrived in the quarantine zone, alone and scared and with blood on his hands he couldn't wash away, no matter how hard he tried. and yet, he had been lucky enough to find people who took him in, helped him through the ebb and flow of his adjustment. he aimed to do just that for emmeline. there were moments of good in their blossoming friendship, moments of growth that sebastian had seen and he would always be proud of her, even with the bad.

he had thankfully been unoccupied when he heard the call for his presence, exiting the doors with his jacket thrown loosely over his shoulders. he could feel the oncoming cold nipping at his exposed wrists, the pads of his fingertips, the flesh of his cheeks. and yet, he was focused on none of that -- only the woman in front of him.

" emmeline? " he calls out to her, not making a movement closer. she needs space in this moment, and he knows to give it to her. " you did good, coming to get me. okay? can i come closer, or would you like me to stay where i am? "

[sebcastillo]

THE WORLD THAT THEY had once known, a living, breathing organism for them to call home had been decimated within a matter of days -- they were never meant to live like this. while complete security wasn't guaranteed in this world, it was at least supposed to be an option. instead, what the citizens he had interacted had been left with was loss, visceral anger and guttural pain. he had never pushed his sister to talk about her experience before dallas, and he had certainly not expected the same of emmeline. instead, he had wanted this friendship to be on her own time -- after all, he had the gift of the quarantine zone's safety for the past five years. she had not.

sebastian never felt like he had to take care of people, it was never a requirement -- but a simple choice. perhaps as a child, due to his parents absence the more their family grew. however, he made an intentional choice to trust his gut and keep those people safe. emmeline was most certainly not a burden, and he found himself becoming protective of her in such a short time not out of guilt, or whatever some may have thought. this protective nature was why he had gone to medical school in the first place.

while seba stood from a distance that he hoped would make emmeline feel heard, listened to. it brought him some amount of peace to know that emmeline trusted him enough to come to him, and he wanted to nurse that trust instead of destroy it. " emmeline... the fact that you know you don't want to hurt anyone.. " seba says, still standing stationary as he holds out his arm to help her into the hospital. " it's a good sign. " he pauses for a moment, eyes softening. " we can stay out here as long as you need to.. okay? "

like any coin, being slightly out of touch with reality had its two sides - it both protected and put her in danger, almost simultaneously. emmeline was a survivor like a cat with 'nine lives' - she was simply 'lucky'. however, that luck came at a price of her deterioration and inability to trust like she had done so many times before. when everything had changed, she thought it would get solved. she was doing well in life for once, she was stable and thriving and everyone's structures quickly fell - she was no exception.

there had been people around her, ones that were too close and then... it would be a long running pattern and trauma only exacerbated her illness. guilt was no uncommon thing with people. the woman could think of a lot more deserving people to be here, people who she had admired and loved throughout her life, that had helped her so much but it didn't play out that way. her sister cared a lot about her, even when she had her own children and she'd always fought to be a support - the other had made it clear very early on that she wanted to remain close to her, to make sure she wasn't alone.

it always felt so real and sometimes, she could recognise it and keep it to herself, other times, not so much. it had lead emmeline to sebastian because he seemed genuine. the woman couldn't be so sure but he had helped her, somewhat filling the role of her late sister without realising it. her chest hurt. she was about to start her dialogue when she heard that - 'you did good, coming to get me.' she'd sworn her family had said something similar to her when she was unknowingly at the worst points of her life, however, now there just seemed to be a lot more of them. it had somewhat broken her out of what she'd initially thought but that didn't mean the idea wasn't still pressurised within her. "you're not safe with me." emmeline was gentle in nature, she wasn't going to hurt anyone and that should have told her everything she needed to know.