#congrats you have discovered my not so tragic backstory

[apollosdrunkenmixup]

I’m not a girl anymore but I remember lonely wandering around the playground. It was a decent first school, so if I went up to a group and asked to join their game I was usually allowed. But I was never invited, and always felt like I was intruding. I had one friend but that was more circumstances than actual friendship. She was genuinely a lovely person, who got on with everyone, very smart, the perfect little girl. But I’m fairly sure she wouldn’t have even noticed me in the first place if our parents hadn’t been friends. My favourite playground memory is when a teacher, not another student, a teacher, taught me how to bend a certain plant so you could fire the head off of it. I spent hours making daisy chains and walking up and down the playground.

In middle school (year 4-year8) I spend my breaktimes in the library, and lunchtimes in weirdly niche clubs (Latin, knitting) with only a few other students. I never had classes with my one friend from first school, so I felt I couldn’t hang out outside of lessons. I did manage to join one group of friends, on the outskirts. But looking back none of them were very nice, they clearly viewed me as the annoying tag along.

When I got to senior school (9-13) I joined cadets, from that formed a friend group who hung out at breaks and lunches. But again I hung out on the outside. There was only three people who I really cared about in that group, but those three were all close friends and I hung around the outside of them. The big group eventually split into two smaller groups and I stuck with those three friends. Then two of them had a falling out and that group dissolved. And I was left alone again. I spent many hours in the library throughout all that, and even more after it fell appart. Year 11 I started hanging out with my cousin and her friends. They were a sweet bunch, but I was still obviously an outsider. 6th form (years 12&13) saw me find a group to hang out with during free periods. But the group had formed years before, so I way again an outsider. Then later I hung out with another group, but again I was an outsider. Because I hadn’t been there when it formed, and I was splitting my time between two groups.

Year 13 it finally improved. I became part of a friend group where I felt I finally belonged, and I was part of the main group, not hanging on the outskirts. All of them were year 11, but I still got on well with them and love them all. I had the other two groups to hang with during frees, but breaks and lunches I spent with the group I was actually part of, not just hanging on the edge of.

Even though I’ve left school, that group is the one I still in contact with. Even if I don’t see one of them for a couple of months there’s no awkwardness in meeting up. We just hug and say hi. And I do regularly meet up with several of them outside of school.

I know most of them are of tumblr, so if you guys see this, thank you for showing me what proper friendship is like. I love you all so much. ♥️

[finsterwalds]

Got a very inspired ask inquiring about the villains in my Better Call Saul french AU so here's Gus aka famous chef Gustavo Faure and his main waiter Léo haha. More info under the cut as always...

So at first I thought about making Gus a fast-food owner like his canon counterpart, but it just doesn't fit really well if you wanna frenchify it all with nuance. We have fast-foods ofc and we do enjoy fried chicken lol, but Los Pollos Hermanos has this very distinct "patriotic" feeling that wouldn't translate as well in France, as fast-foods are american in conception. I thought about making Gus the owner of some cheaper chain like Courtepaille lmao, but it feels too memey and doesn't have the prestige that his character has canonically. Gus assimilates perfectly into american society with his brand, and caters to the people locally, so I thought it would be fair for him to do the same in France. And if you wanna cater to lovers of chic, gastronomy and prestige, what's better than being the chef of some fancy restaurant, right? It felt cliché af and looses the "close to the people" part but it honestly fits his character well, imo...

He would be extremely respected locally but still friendly and approachable due to him crafting some kind of tragic backstory for himself and his restaurant. Basically he would play the "Chilean refugee that climbed to the top of foreign cuisine" card and everyone would buy it. French people love to eat and are fond of mixing their culture's meals with more international food, so yes: I think he would serve a fusion of french/Chilean food!

He'd also be an entrepreneur as famous french chefs often have side businesses like bakeries or published books, which I think respects his canon personality pretty well. Fancy french chefs also like to hang out outside their kitchen to greet their guests and I can totally imagine Gus do that. He'd still be able to conceal his shady side nicely. He's canonically seen to like fine wine, good products, and cooks Paila Marina for Walt, so congrats to Gus for already being french in conception and not making this idea feel like a stretch lol.

I have no idea about his exact role concerning drug traffic in Europe, as I said I'm pretty ignorant about that… But he'd use his business and image to form connections and launder his money. His backstory with Max stays the same in the AU aka Max was his business """"partner""" who died killed by the Salamancas.

I don't think changing his first name was necessary, but his last name sounding american I thought I would just frenchify it a bit lol. I don't know what the name of his restaurant would be, but definitely something short, spanish, and aesthetic/poetic. Maybe a reference to Max to allude to the Hermanos part.

Bonus : I know they don't canonically meet, but in my AU I think Chuck, as a rich lawyer, would eat at Gustavo's often. They'd be acquainted :) And maybe Jérôme aka Jimmy meets him thru his brother and later discovers Gus' shady side, when the events of BrBa start.

[teddybasmanov]

Unexpected FicRec

Since I’m super euphoric, because I’ve passed one of my exams almost without preparation today, I want to do something good for the world. So, I decided to share with you one of the jewels I’ve discovered on AO3 a month or so ago. A person who writes for an almost non-existent fandom and wonderful original works too.

ThiccDiccEnergy (yes, I know how it sounds, but bear with me)

I’m going to recommend two series – “Audio Roleplay Continuations” (pretty self-explanatory) and “Monster Fu**er” (honestly, also pretty self-explanatory, but these are the original works I mentioned). Technically, they also have a “Doom” fic (but it scares me with its size and even #sizekink doesn’t help), a “Naruto” fic, an “Among Us” fic and three “My Hero Academia” fics (and I’m not in the fandoms), go check those out if any of these is your thing.

Before I start going into details, keep in mind that all the fics are rated explicit, all of them include smut, sometimes graphic and all of them include graphic descriptions of violence and some other stuff, so read the tags carefully. All the fics, except for one “My Hero Academia” fic are reader-inserts. All reader inserts except for one are gender-neutral and all the readers are badasses. So, without further ado:

Audio Roleplay Continuations:

1.           “Continuation of Hollow_VAs A Mission With A Charming Spy” – you probably don’t even remember that Hollow has such a video, but he does (here it is). It’s literally a ten-minute-long one-shot – some back-story, some teasing, nothing more to it. Here, we have four chapters of even more backstory, great plot, action scenes, very exciting smut and (probably spoilers) an absolutely wonderful ending. This is one of the two fics that are currently finished.

2.           “A continuation of Hollow_VAs 'Noble Paladin Needs Your Help'” – again originally a one-shot with no continuation but this time in our beloved Sarrus. We’ve got quest set up and a very nice character with potential but that’s it. The fic is written partly on my request, which I still can’t believe, and for now has quest development, a sweet naïve paladin and an in every way experienced thief/rouge listener who gets “busy” with literally everyone (good for them), but also has a tragic backstory and a gentle soul deep down there somewhere. The other quest companions (if you remember, there’re supposed to be two more of them) are also very interesting and very well written characters.

3.           “Continuation of Siren Son ASMR's 'Comforting a Bull Man'” – man does not live on Hollow_VA alone, so here’s some Siren. Also written partly because of my recommendation and I can’t be prouder of myself. It’s a very recent work (I mean, while I’m writing this it came out just this morning) and it has only one chapter now, but Duke is one of my favourite characters and he deserves some comfort and protection and that’s exactly what’s the reader here is going to give him.

Monster Fu**er:

1.           “As Above, So Below the Bed” – have you ever wondered how would it be if a huge scary demon-monster lived under your bed you’d run from it, but then befriended it and you know… *points to the series title* Don’t wonder anymore, because that’s exactly what this work is about. Kind of also reminds me of an ASMR roleplay script written by Waterway The Wordsmith, but I’ve only listened to two first parts, so I can’t be sure. This is kind of gorier than the previous stuff, but it never stopped me. The other finished fic. This one has not just gore but VERY graphic smut - two versions of it - male and female - and I loved every word of it, every letter.

2.           “Loyal to the King, Never to the Kingdom” – this feels like it was written to target me personally. A protector/spymaster loyal to the king even when treated very poorly by him? But they actually love each other? And there’s also politics involved? I mean, have you seen my username? Count me in. The reader there has much more backbone than “I” do, though (good for them again).

3.           “You are Opal Eyes, and I Can Not Compare (congrats, you have your own symbiote now)” – this is technically a “Venom” fic, but it has nothing to do with the Marvel universe, except for the existence of a symbiote (and it’s not Venom, it's an original symbiote character). This is the only not gender-neutral fic out of all because it is *drum roll* for trans!masc readers! Where else would you get a badass trans guy, who's teaming up with a symbiote to kick some serious butt and then to screw each other? I don’t know, but you’ll definitely get it here.

That’s it, go give them a lot of love, they deserve it so much!

[sparda3g]

Attack on Titan Chapter 120 Review

It felt like forever to receive a new chapter. It’s probably the most thrilling follow-up yet in the series. It’s likely due to the ending hype, the crazy cliffhanger with a flying head, and endless theories from fans on where do we go next. One thing for certain: someone got it right. I can’t say the same for the following scene that really captivated me, and it’s not over yet. This chapter wasn’t all I expected, but I will gladly take this direction with its tensed psychological duel.

My anticipation to see the follow-up was beyond the scale. I can tell with my chilling feeling when turning a page. Either I was scared to know the truth or scared for the inevitable. Before the answer, the flashback does serve a great symbolic between Eren and Zeke and it is done with catching baseball. They may be brothers, but Eren dropped or missed the ball, which, in my opinion, symbolized their trust.

On one hand, you can argue that it’s a sign of one will die, which is Eren. However, recalling Zeke’s time with Tom, they always caught the ball as they are in the same page. Eren missing the ball strongly suggested that they are not. It is reinforced when Eren basically lied about him feeling weak. Trust lies on the ball. It’s definitely proven to be true, but we’ll get to that soon. It’s a great start to a thrilling chapter that will ultimately represent the theme.

It goes into a great morbid montage of an epic warfare. It’s a tensed sensation that no innocent would want to be part of. You have Braus Family in hiding, Marley’s men dying and devoured by titans, plenty of ongoing battles including Mikasa and Armin taking on Cart Titan, and to top it all off, decapitated Eren. What a nice sight of hell. Tons of theories were going around for a month. Did Eren alter the memories? Will he go back in time? Is he hiding somewhere? The answer is what you see; he legitimately lost his head. But, Zeke catches it in time and yes, the magic touch has come through. Good call on fans’ prediction. I mean it makes sense; I just didn’t know where it was flying to.

The whole moment was breathtaking. It’s probably because of no dialogues, which created a morbid sensation. It has the endgame feel to it as well. We don’t know if this is the last action phase, though I doubt it. I can’t imagine what the final battle would be like. The catch felt surreal. The past chapters played off as the defining moment and I certainly believed it. It’s even bone-chilling to see the collection of memories scattering over two pages. Some are Eren’s, some are not. There are few that may not have shown yet for us fans, but we may learn really soon.

The sight of PATHS is rather mesmerizing. I know it’s a simple beam of light, but the emphasis on that solo page brings out the magnitude of its atmosphere. It’s where everything will change forever, and it all comes down to Eren. Zeke is also there, but looks older. Apparently, the time within differs from outside world; probably years have gone by for all we know. Zeke did confirm that he made contact in time before Eren died. I assume that means he is really dead; however, it’s still possible for him to be resurrected by Ymir. My only concern is, what is happening currently outside. Losing his head might not only be done for shock value, but a reason to skip time. It depends on the path, no pun intended.

Ymir the Founder emerges and Zeke assures Eren that it’s her. It’s quite telling that Eren learned about her background from Zeke and the one that stood out the most is her loneliness. It’s true that anyone would be shocked and perhaps awed to hear a little girl in sadness, but he just heard many things connected to titans, yet only that one he reacted to. It’s perhaps a contrast to where Zeke was more amazed by her connection, while Eren was more on her being. Zeke is chained by “vow of renouncing war,” so he leaves Eren to do the final act; the final plead to save the world. Karma just keeps on coming.

Thanks to Armin and his recollections of subtle hints to Eren’s true intention, it feels so satisfying when Eren finally comes clean and backstabs Zeke. I can’t lie, but I was fooled by his act earlier. Some parts did show signs of hidden agenda, but his act was very convincing. Now, I am so damn happy for his “betrayal.” With that said, he still didn’t reveal his main goal; only desire for Ymir to share her power. Plus, we still need to know what he really saw in memories trip, including the supposedly truth of Ackerman. In due time. I can enjoy yet somewhat sympathize with Zeke weeping. His only family had double crossed him. It’s all over. Or so I thought.

In this series’ fashion, no twist is limited to one alone. Add a twist on top of the twist and you get the real twist. In a sense, Ymir denies Eren and favors for Zeke. I didn’t see that coming. The real twist is Ymir is actually a slave to Royal Blood and guess who has it. That’s right; Zeke has pulled a counter trap card or how fans would call it, a reverse card. I miss playing Uno.

This finally explains the reason for Zeke’s “revival.” This series is known to have every moment count. Have he not underwent the first time, he wouldn’t have understood everything. In his second trip so to say, he obtained many details and ploy an act to see if Eren is truly on his side. Otherwise, Zeke probably weep and witness the downfall entirely. This creates for an exciting development. We are back to protagonist versus antagonist, and that’s not a bad thing. Also, the two sides can finally go head-to-head (no pun intended?) in a thrilling psychological duel.

It’s interesting that despite the betrayal, Zeke is willing to go through one last attempt to bring his little brother to his side. I’m glad that he didn’t go out of his way and become cartoony villain with evil laugh and betray his character. It makes the most sense for him to try to convert because he is the only family he has left. His backstory and thought process complement his character. It speaks true brotherhood. The one way to try to convince him is to present Grisha as a mad man; only this time, his life behind the walls.

I’m amazed how much of a character Grisha has shown without being alive. Kudos to Isayama to remind the fans of his relevancy. It’s also amazing how much details we continue to learn about the past that we thought we’ve seen enough. Eren and Zeke travelled back in time to the moment when Eren was born. The vision presents the scene as one big happy family. Zeke congrats Eren’s birth, but he holds bare grudge against his father. It speaks volume how much he detested him till this day. Eren, on other hand, speaks for those who truly loved their family. That look on his face watching his family tells everything. It’s a sincere moment that shows two reaction from two sons.

Fans had wonder how Grisha discovered the Founding Titan’s location. Thanks to PATHS with its memory trip, we finally received the answer and it’s under our noses in a sense. It’s due to his status as a doctor that granted him an opportunity to travel and seek for those who has connection. This gives Zeke the firepower to convince Eren that their father was always selfish and cruel; putting his mission over his family. Eren looks to be convinced, but it’s more of what Zeke wanted to hear.

It’s really neat to see a montage of Grisha’s time as a family man. We have seen the plot points, but hardly in a slice of life scenario. There are best of times, there are worst of times. I always appreciate the cameo of Kenny in these past scenes. By this point, I still didn’t like Grisha and how he was too prideful to fulfill self-created destiny. I made that clear in one of my past reviews. But, these moments did grant us to see more of his human and normal self, colliding with his mission. Then, the scene that should have been the definitive strike happens, and Zeke definitely convert someone’s opinion.

Grisha discovered the Founding Titan’s location years before the start of the series. This could have been a “told you so” moment; by that, I mean Zeke is right. Grisha struggled to decide on what to do next. It’s like a video game. You have two choices and one will guaranteed a path differ another. However, there’s no return. If we go by that logic, the dark or renegade path would be going inside the basement. The light or paragon path would be ignore it. It was that moment that changed my mind on Grisha. He actually put his family first above his mission. In other words, he was a changed man.

This speaks tons of volume. In fact, it lined up really well with every moments with him. My impression was that he never really changed and always came off as a stubborn, prideful man. Even the last moment with him and Shadis felt ominous; like he was really sinister. Now, the impression I have is, he really did change for the better. It’s just unfortunate when the Wall broke down, the thought of the mission returned heavily.

The way I see it is similar to Reiner. Both lived in a new life and a better one at that. The only difference is Reiner was progressing his mission slowly. However, both took their time and enjoy what they had. Once tragic or a reminder struck, it came races through their head. Both can’t escape the past and must pay the price. Grisha was hit hard when his wife died, so he charged to the King of the Wall’s base, and the story of Eren begins. This is my assumption and it’s possible that the next chapter will reveal more of his side of the story, but I believe this is the case. This would paint him as a man who went through a redemption phase. If so, I’m glad to be wrong on his character. Yes, his past self was awful, but if one can learn, a second chance can appear.

Speaking of the past, an interesting element rise up once again and by that, I mean the possible interference within the memory. Krueger left an ominous message about Armin and Mikasa, even though he never met them. That scene has been driving fans crazy, but it looks like the answer is upon us. Grisha woke up and believed he saw Zeke, but in his current design, beard and all. Undoubtedly, a “what the hell” moment. On top of that, Grisha was dreaming something where he was apologizing Zeke for his mistake; further proving his redemption arc was complete.

This raised plenty of questions. Was Zeke’s presence alternating the past? Was it like that beforehand? This reminds me of Game of Thrones, where a character was interfering the past and ultimately changed someone for the present. I wonder who will hold the door. One fan would suggest that perhaps Eren is manipulating the scene to convince Zeke that he’s wrong. I don’t think so. I believe Eren knows everything. He takes the control, so to speak, to tour Zeke to see where he was wrong and why Eren won’t change his mind. It’s a very intriguing development and a clever use of uncovering all remaining pieces of Grisha’s past.

Overall, this chapter may be confusing at first, but surely, all answers will come, and the pathway of its memory trip will make everything sense. The idea is the two brothers are in psychological warfare. With that said, it was pretty compelling. I thought once the touch was made, it’s immediately game over, but this direction is more intriguing and insightful. Eventually, it will lead to the world-changing event. It abruptly ended with Eren ready to show the next phase. Whoever wins, the future will be set.