#concluding that therefore nobody is really ace and all ace people just *think* they are

[perennial-bee]

"trans people are only trans because of oppressive gender roles and if we just got rid of the gender roles nobody would be trans" might sound like a hot take, a thoughtful and compassionate take, but unfortunately it is ice cold and does not understand how being trans works at all. meet and talk to and listen to more trans people - preferably in real life - before making assertions like this, especially if you yourself are not trans.

[miyukousawa]

The Importance Of Miyuki's Character in Daiya

Hello my darlings. ‘Tis I coming back with something nobody asked for, but y'all are gonna get it anyways because I've had this on my mind for the LONGEST time.

Disclaimer: I am a peasant who does not know what goes on inside the mind of Terajima-sensei. Please do not take anything I say and be like “is that true!?” because I am just a fangirl who likes to overthink.

Let's get started. This is gonna be a long text pos, so if you're ready, buckle up, get your popcorn.

Here we go!!

--

We all know Miyuki Kazuya, our devilish catcher, was the soul reason for Sawamura Eijun to take the Seido scholarship because he wanted to pitch to Miyuki's Mitt again. Yadda yadda. We all know that story.

Let's rewind all the way back to before the main story even takes place, before Eijun and Miyuki even meet each other.

In life, there are different paths. Every little decision we make determines our future. Sometimes it's good, and sometimes it's bad.

One of my favorite things as a writer is the “butterfly effect” - “a butterfly flapping its wings and causing a hurricane” but in simpler terms: “one small thing can change everything”.

And here is where we're I'm going to apply this: Miyuki's middle school team loses to Chris', and while he sits on the bench lost in thought, Miss Takashima (seido’s scouter) approaches him. If you pay attention, she was originally going to scout Chris. But she decided to scout Miyuki not knowing he was still a middle schooler. And he took the offer.

Now, here is where things are going to get interesting: What if Takashima hadn't approached Miyuki or Miyuki decided not to take the offer?

Miyuki says the reason he was at Seido is because of Chris and Takashima. We're gonna explore the other path. The one where Miyuki does not go to Seido and how this one, small change majorly impacts the entire story.

Narumiya Mei and Miyuki were friends; Mei gathered a bunch of all star players to convince them to go to Inashiro and make the ultimate team. In canon, Miyuki rejects this offer, saying he was scouted by Seido, but...what if that offer was never there or Mei manages to win him over? Because Inashiro invited him to attend their school.

Miyuki deciding upon going to Inashiro is where everything you know in canon no longer happens. Scary, yet intriguing, right?

Inashiro usually prefers not to not have first years in main positions or the starting line-up. Mei started off with the number 18 his first year. You might think that Miyuki's skills would blow Kunitomo's mind, right? Not so sure about that. Because they have Masa-san (Harada). Who is a second year. Who has more experience in high school baseball than Miyuki would.

The reason Miyuki even had number 2 at Seido his first year was because of Chris' unfortunate injury. Seido was willing to put their hands in a first year because... They really had no other option; Miyuki was the most qualified for the position.

Seido without Miyuki is...not the same team. He's their pillar. He's their leader. Without him, what are they?

With Chris down, and Miyuki being at Inashiro, my guess is that Miyauchi would be the main catcher for Seido up until he retires.

If Takashima still goes to Nagano and scouts Eijun, when she takes him to Seido to observe the grounds and he gets into that quarrel with Azuma over bullying Nori, (my fellow misawa shippers y'all better clutch your chests) there is no Miyuki to offer catching his pitches.

Because he chose a different path.

Miyuki was Eijun's reason to come to Seido. And because he isn't there and Inashiro doesn't know this boy even exists, Eijun is not gonna see a reason to leave home just to attend Seido. What will he do with his life? Probably go to a regular high school and if he's lucky, he'll be on the baseball team.

But Eijun's growth as a pitcher was because of Seido. Because of Chris. Even his most recent achievement “the numbers” was because of working with Miyuki.

Although Eijun isn't at Seido, he'll be with his childhood friends and his family. So that's a positive. Though with pros there are cons: not going to Seido means baseball may end for him when he graduates high school. Seido is a school that scouters keep an eye on, especially during tournaments, for any talented players they have.

I really do not think Eijun would go university/college because it's expensive and no team is going to take him in the condition he would be in. As said above: Eijun's major growth as a pitcher is due to Seido. Maybe his high school would try to work out the kinks, maybe they won't.

My theory is, since the Sawamura family live on a farm, Eijun would work on it. Not exactly the future he would want.

Applying our friend the butterfly effect, Eijun not going to Seido changes the future.

The reason for Chris snapping out of his funk was because of Eijun. As the fandom likes to refers to him: he's the literal embodiment of sunshine. Without Eijun there, Chris would never find it in himself to move forward with his life. To love baseball again.

Chris is not the only one who had some sunshine cast into his life: Okumura came to Seido specifically for Eijun. If you remember the first time we met him, he and Seto had come to watch the Teito vs Seido match. The school who won would determine where they would go to high school. He also took quite the interest in Eijun as well just from that one match.

Without Miyuki, there is no Eijun. So even if Seido does manage to get this far and they face Teito, there is nothing Seido has for Okumura to consider going there. Considering Seto and Okumura do go to this game. If there is no Eijun, there is nothing for Okumura to consider. Why is this important? To keep spoilers to a minimum for my non-manga folks (the anime will cover this), Okumura, like Chris, is in a funk where baseball is not fun and it takes a certain southpaw to bring that spark back. Without Eijun, Okumura will not be able to let go of his past and never be able to move forward.

Miyuki's absence doesn't just affect Eijun's future, Furuya also came to Seido for Miyuki. Long story short: Furuya was outcasted in Hokkaido due to being a powerful pitcher. Being an introvert, he doesn't open up to people easily, so being excluded from the thing he's good at is difficult. He didn't play baseball in middle school because of being a “monster” pitcher. Furuya saw a magazine cover with first year Miyuki on it and thought maybe this genius catcher would be able to catch his pitches.

Tying everything I said above back into this, Inashiro doesn't usually have their first years in starting positions if they can help it (Itsuki is an exception to this, most likely due to being the best pick of the entire first and second years); with Harada being their main catcher, Miyuki will possibly be on the sidelines. Therefore, his picture won't be on the cover of a sports magazine when Furuya is still in his last year of middle school. And thus Furuya will not go to Seido.

Where would he go? Most likely a regular school in his area or maybe even Komadai Fujimaki. Would he be happy? No. Seido is what brought out his true potential as a pitcher. Where he's respected by his teammates. Furuya doesn't make friends easily. You can conclude Eijun and Haruichi were his first real friends. But because in this world of actions have consequences, he doesn't go to Seido. He won't meet Eijun (who stays in Nagano) and Haruichi.

This one decision Miyuki makes doesn't only affect the characters I've gone over, it affects the entire team.

After the third years retire, Kataoka begins to think about resigning which is where Ochiai comes into the picture as the coach that will take over for him.

Seido does not have Miyuki, Eijun, Furuya as their key players, so their lineup will be quite different. It's quite possible that when the third years retire, Ono would be the main catcher and Nori as the ace with Toujou as a relief pitcher.

The reason Seido has gotten as far as they have is because of Miyuki’s game calling and their pitcher relay.

Take all that away, and you have a completely different team. Kataoka would resign and leave Seido, leaving Ochiai in charge of the team.

So you see, one simple decision of what high school to attend can change the entire story. For good or for worse, that's up to you to decide.

That's all. If you read this whole thing, I applaud you. Because that takes effort.

If you liked this, and want to see more stuff like this, you can always message me or slide an ask along.

[kaigrt]

Proof that Ushiten is indisputably 1000% canon

This paper aims to prove that there is no possible doubt behind the 1000% canonicity of the romantic relationship between Ushijima Wakatoshi and Tendou Satori from the manga Haikyuu!!. Our knowledge of Ushijima Wakatoshi, Tendou Satori and their relationship is wholly based on the official art and story provided by manga artist Haruichi Furudate, and therefore we will not source any fan-made work. Previous research has been limited to single instances that suggest some kind of relationship between these two, but despite considerable interest, no one as far as we know has attempted to compile an extensive list of points that, when combined, prove that a romantic relationship between them is 1000% fact.

The term ‘Ushiten’ shall henceforth be used as a shorthand notation to denote Ushijima and Tendou’s romantic relationship.

Tendou is first seen at the end of chapter 150, and named in chapter 151 page 2 (one page before this one). And what is the first thing he does? Put his hand on Ushijima’s shoulder. That’s right. He clearly wastes NO time asserting just who Ushijima belongs to.

Is that Wakatoshi’s boyfriendo laughing at his jokes? Why yes. Yes, it is.

Do I really need to say anything here? This pretty much speaks for itself.

There is no question that Tendou can't keep his hands off of Ushijima. This is like the third panel they're in together that's not an action scene, and Tendou is feeling Ushijima up in two out of the three. These pages are radiating with sexual tension, I tell you.

Also, look how mindful he is of Ushijima's feelings. Most people would just be like "yaaay, I scored a bunch of points, I feel awesome.", but no. Not Tendou. He'll check in with Ushijima in between points, because he cares about Ushijima and his feelings. It's evident.

An untrained eye might overlook this, but take special note of Tendou's outstretched left arm here. Also notice that Tendou's right arm is not visible in this panel to the right of his body. This suggests that both of his arms are outstretched. Combined with that beaming smile towards his ace, the only possible conclusion is that he's going in for a hug, which solidifies my previous point of Tendou not being able to keep his hands off of Ushijima.

I mean, hello. If this is not the face of someone who is completely enamoured of his ace, then I don't know what is.

Even Coach Ukai can tell something is going on between these two. It's impossible to think about one without also thinking about the other. He can clearly only see them together.

Look at them staring lovingly into each other's eyes. Tendou with the slight head tilt too. True love. It's canon.

Ignore Shirabu here for a second, and take a moment to notice who's behind the speech bubbles. Yup. That's right. It's Tendou and Ushijima, sneaking glances at each other.

There is a chance you might be thinking “Yeah well, I guess I sorta see your point, but so far it's mostly been Tendou touching/staring at Ushijima, not so much the other way around”. Well, that's changing here. Notice Tendou prancing by the net with his long-ass model legs, and more importantly, notice that Ushijima is totally checking him out. Ya. What d'ya got to say to that?

Also keep in mind that Ushijima is more reserved with his emotions in general, so for him we have to read inbetween the lines a little more.

But Tendou wears his emotions on his sleeve and we don't have to read between the lines for him at all. He'll just yell 'em out at full volume on national TV no problem, not even thinking twice about using Ushijima's first name without suffix. And nobody bats an eye, so apparently Tendou calling Ushijima 'miracle boy' is business as usual as well, and that's just his go-to nickname for his lover. Tendou hasn't called any of his other teammates 'miracle boy', and neither have any others called Ushijima 'miracle boy', so it's unquestionable that this is something special between the two of them.

Imagine this panel was just a bit taller. More specifically, imagine where Tendou and Ushijima's hands are reaching. Exactly. You're seeing what you think you're seeing. There's no bend at Ushijima's elbow, meaning that his arm continues reaching to the right. Tendou is clearly leaning to the left and extending his arm that way. The only possible conclusion is that they're reaching for each other's hands. This hypothesis is supported by the expressions on their faces. Yes, their faces tell all.

Ushijima looks frustrated about losing the set, as if he's blaming himself, thinking about what he could have done differently. Tendou has a softer expression on his face. As if he wants to comfort Ushijima. As if he just wants to tell him “it's okay, we'll get the next set”. That's why he's reaching for his boyfriend's hand, to give him a soft squeeze while Washijou is yelling at them.

Oh Ushijima. You poor, innocent and oblivious child. Don't you know? When someone tells you how scary the horror movie they watched is, it means they want you to hold them during said movie. And the talk about cute actresses? Please. Tendou, you sly fox, you. It's the perfect excuse. It's a classic high school boy excuse to watch a movie with your best friend who you secretly have a crush on while also making yourself seem straight. Especially if you actually really just want to watch a horror movie to claim you're scared so you can cuddle up to said friend. But it's not gay because we're watching a movie with a cute actress. Or is it? Well, at that point you can gauge said friend's reaction, and make an educated guess on how open they would be to any advances. It's genius.

Oh, why didn't I come up with this in my teens? OH WAIT. WHAT’S THAT? I DID. THAT’S HOW I KNOW WHAT YOU’RE DOING, TENDOU. DON’T THINK YOU CAN HIDE YOUR TRUE INTENTIONS FROM ME.

I cropped up a few panels on this page and compiled them into one image, because there's a lot going on here. I just wanna point out how enthusiastic Tendou is when he's talking to Ushijima. How interested he is in his background and motivations. His speech bubbles are all bubbly too. It's unmistakable that Tendou truly believes Ushijima is going to be a star and he has no inhibitions when it comes to telling him that. There's this instance, but there's also another one later on after the Shiratorizawa vs. Karasuno match, so I'll get back to that. In any case it means that Tendou sincerly thinks Ushijima is absolutely amazing.

Using the raws here, because this is one of the most telling scenes and I felt that both the official translation and an online scanslation kind of twisted his words. So. What's Tendou saying here? In romaji, 美しいねぇ would be  “utsukushii nee”. “nee” has very little meaning, so we'll focus on “utsukushii” here, which literally translates to “beautiful”. Yes. He's calling Ushijima beautiful. In the manga. Canon. With a completely smitten expression on his face. Need I say more?

Some people might think that Tendou is only talking about Ushijima's form here. And if you're a very perceptive person, you might even say “But wait! Tendou has used that word to describe someone else before!”, and you would be partly correct. He has indeed used the word “utsukushii” to describe Kageyama's form. HOWEVER!

The difference is that with Kageyama, he's commenting on Kageyama's beautiful FORM (美しいフォーム) that's falling apart. With Ushijima, Tendou doesn't mention his form at all. We can therefore conclude that, had Tendou really only been talking about Ushijima's form, he would have said so. But he didn't, and so the only possibility is that he is calling Ushijima himself beautiful. This in turn confirms that Tendou undeniably has feelings for Ushijima that extend beyond the platonic.

Look at Tendou looking in utter amazement at his boyfriendo's great serve.

He just can't help sneaking glances at Ushijima out whenever gets the chance.

Ah, nothing as satisfying as scoring a point with a toss from your boyfriend, or by tossing to your boyfriend, am I right? Their facial expressions say it all.

Okay, hello. First of all, Ushijima is quoting Tendou. That means he definitely thinks highly of him, especially considering Tendou and Ushijima's use of language is worlds apart to begin with, so it's probably not something Ushijima would usually say.

Secondly, this might be the softest and kindest expression we've seen from Ushijima so far. So far we've really mostly seen him be stoic, not showing much emotion at all. But this, this almost looks loving. Best of all, this expression is directed towards Tendou.

And last but not least, look at Tendou flipping his shit over all this in the last panel. He's feeling A LOTTT of emotions right there, there's no denying that!

Even Ushijima is looking in amazement and clapping. Coming from him, that means something, because he's not usually someone to express enthusiasm or admiration.

Another well-known scene. Things of note here: just Tendou and Ushijima are stretching here. The other third-years? Their kouhais? Not here. This suggests that they have a closer relationship with each other than they do with the rest of the team.

Secondly, it's evident that Tendou knows Ushijima well and understands how he's feeling. What's even more interesting is that Ushijima, who is normally pretty reserved, doesn't hesitate to open up towards Tendou about his true feelings, even though they might be immature.

Then Tendou voices his admiration, complimenting his straight, and for the second time straight-up asserting that Ushijima is going to be a volleyball star in the future, with his own documentary and everything. He also says he'll be sure to watch Ushijima on TV (I checked with the raws, he really uses Ushijima's name there). From this it is indisputable that Tendou cares about Ushijima beyond just a high school friend, he's truly invested in his future and wants to see him succeed. This is the kind of support you would get from a partner moreso than from just a friend.

Tendou just barges into Ushijima's room without knocking and apparently this is fine and normal and happens all the time, because Ushijima doesn't complain or even blink. That's how close and comfortable they are with each other. And they share a copy of Shounen Jump.

C A N O N

Okay, HELLO. Just look at what is going on in this panel.

“We'll be back~”, WITH a squiggle at the end of the sentence. Was also there in the original Japanese manga, mind you. That's a suggestive tone if ever I saw one.

Finger air quotes, Tendou? Seriously, take this in for a moment; FINGER AIR QUOTES? You'll “be back”? Come on. This can really only mean one thing, guys. Let's be honest.

Tendou's face just screams “Heyyyy, we're getting it on”. Look at it. Look at that face. Zoom in or something. Seductive AF.

They're standing so close together. Also, Ushijima, where is your hand going?

What's Hayato looking at? That's right. He's looking at where Ushijima's hand is going. And look at his expression. If that isn't a face that says “oh hey, there they go again”, then I don't know what is.

If it was just one or two of the above, I could say “okay, this doesn't have to mean anything”. But combine all these things together in one panel, and it really points towards one thing and one thing only.

Look. Canon. They're not even out of sight yet and already Tendou can't keep his hands off his lover.

You would know, Tendou.

No, but seriously. Tendou knowing Ushijima's schedule, answering his questions for him, and Ushijima not minding all point towards something more going on here. Usually people who are 'just friends' don't know exactly what their friend is going to be doing when (and they usually don't answer questions for their friends either).

“But since they're both helping with the training camp, isn't it natural that Tendou would know who else is going to be there?”, you might ask. Well, Hayato is helping too, and clearly he doesn't know. So no, just because Tendou is also helping with the training camp, does not mean that he automatically knows who else is going to be there.

Tendou getting protective of his boyfriend. Really, who would notice anyone staring in an abnormal way at someone other than yourself? In most situations, people wouldn't give it a second thought. But if someone's staring weirdly at your partner... Then suddenly this scenario becomes a lot more understandable.

Tendou keeping an eye on them 'cause he wants to know what business Hinata has with his boyfriend. Just in case.

Stiiiill keeping an eye out. No one's checking Ushijima out scot-free on Tendou's watch.

I think I know why Furudate has a fondness for this particular sketch. It shows Ushijima and Tendou running off into the sunset together, hand in hand. As we have already seen countless pieces of proof of so far, Furudate also ships Ushijima and Tendou. And if the manga artist themself ships it, it's canon.

OKAY COME ONNN! There's no denying this! They're standing SO close! They're practically on top of each other! That is not an ordinary distance (or lack thereof, really) between two high school boys who are just friends. They're getting it on off-screen, no doubt.

Look at them, running off together. We know Ushijima is faster than his teammates and will leave them behind if they can't keep up. But here apparently he waited for Tendou to finish his interview with Hinata, and he's slowing down enough so they can run together. Aww. ♡

No way Ushijima would do promo for anyone other than his bf.

Of course Tendou would return the favour.

Okay, hello. Does this really need an explanation? Tendou is openly proclaiming that Ushijima is #1. He's got to have strong feelings for Ushijima for him to be so vocal about it.

Look how close they're sitting together. Way closer than the others are. Tendou's elbow is totally touching Ushijima's arm. And his knee is almost touching his hand.

I also wanna point out just how consistently they're always together.

Everyone in this room is focused on the twins entering the room, except for one person: Ushijima. Ushijima is too busy checking Tendou out, to such an extent that he's completely ignoring Atsumu who's calling his name.

Furudate's dream team. Both Ushijima and Tendou are on the team. Coincidence? I think not.

Anyone who claims they're not holding hands behind their backs is LYING.

THEY EVEN HAVE A PUDDING DATE.

I mean, I know 'looking' gay isn't really a thing, but if you had to point out someone in this picture...

Look. There is even a sticker with Tendou longingly looking at his lover. Canon, I tell you.

You can tell Reon is totally accepting of their relationship and is happy for both of them.

And then Goshiki is like “WHAT? REALLY?” after Taichi tells him about it. That's why he turns his head and looks so surprised, you see.

And Shirabu is like “Jeez, you couldn't tell?”

In this study we have investigated the official Haikyuu!! content in order to establish that Ushiten is canon. The numerous pieces of evidence from this study have shown us multiple occasions where Tendou and Ushijima, to give a few examples, complimented each other, touched each other, gave each other looks of admiration, and were attentive to one another, among other things. Taken together, these findings support the idea that their relationship involves deeper emotions than just platonic ones.

It has to be mentioned that this study is not without limitations. The most important limitation is a result of Haikyuu!! being a Shounen Manga. As a consequence, Ushijima and Tendou's relationship will never be explicitly shown in the manga, however, that does not mean it does not exist. It is for that reason that we turn to more subtle hints, reading between the lines and paying more attention to the details. Substantial insight has been gained with regard to these details, and considering the sheer amount of these findings and the undeniability of their underlying meaning, we have obtained satisfactory results proving that Ushiten is 1000% canon.

[edogawatranslations]

999: Alterna (1) - Part 2, Chapter 7

Table of Contents | Previous: Part 2, Chapters 5-6

Chapter 7

I must have taken everything too lightly.

Even when Zero announced that this game was one of life and death, somewhere inside me, I still believed that nobody would have to die.

But Zero was serious. He must not even care if all of us die here. After all, I was assailed by water and pushed to the brink of drowning at the very start.

What was Zero’s objective?

I racked my brains for an answer but couldn’t come up with anything. No, there might not have even been an answer in the first place. Zero enacted such a cruel method of murder in cold blood. Someone like that had to be demented. He must have been doing this for the sole pleasure of observing our fear.

The clock on the landing signaled the time as ten o’clock. An hour had passed since Zero’s announcement. Yet, we failed to take even a single step beyond the starting line.

“I’ve had it!” Seven yelled out, swinging his fist down. “How long are we gonna sit here for? We’ve only got eight hours left. Enough already, let’s get going! Hurry up and move!”

However, nobody voiced any agreement. I couldn’t even bring myself to nod. After seeing how Bird Nest’s body ended up, how could I?

“Someone say somethin’! You all happy goin’ down with the ship like this?”

“How could we possibly move on? I’m sorry, but I’m not ending up like him,” Lotus responded. She was curled up, hugging her knees. Her lips quivered.

“That guy must’ve made a mistake!” Seven continued. “He probably got caught in a trap or somethin’... It’ll be fine. If we move carefully, we’ll be okay.”

“I don’t think he died from a trap,” Snake spoke up. There was a lack of concern on his face, as if he had seen through everything.

“What do you mean?” Seven huffed.

“That man broke one of Zero’s rules. That’s why he was punished. That’s all I’m suggesting.”

Seven tilted his head in thought. He must have been trying to wrap his head around Snake’s reaction.

“Don’t you understand? Recall Zero’s rules,” Snake continued. “What did he say about the number of people who could pass through a door?”

“‘Only three to five people may open a numbered door...’ Right?”

“And after that? What comes next is the crucial part. What did Zero say?”

Seven cocked his head to one side. He must have forgotten, as he shot me a glance indicating that he wanted me to rescue him from this embarrassment.

“If I remember correctly...” I said, throwing a lifeline to Seven. “‘Only the same number of people may proceed through the door’ or something like that, right?”

“Correct,” Snake replied. “Zero clearly laid out that rule for us. That man with the [9] bracelet broke the rule.”

“I see. He went through the door by himself, so...”

Snake finished my sentence. “That’s why he was punished.”

“So Zero’s monitorin’ our actions from somewhere. He’s gotta watch our every move to see if we break any rules,” Seven concluded.

I looked around. Were there surveillance cameras hidden around us? Was Zero watching us at this very moment, grinning at our situation?

“Hmm... I’m not so sure about that.” Snake refuted Seven’s logic once again. “That’s not the only possible conclusion.”

“Why?”

“The punishment was carried out automatically. That means there’s no need to be constantly monitoring us.”

“What? Say that in simpler words. Wait, why do you even know somethin’ like that?” Seven asked, bringing his stern face closer to Snake. With the two of them next to each other, Seven’s head looked at least twice as big as Snake’s. “Are you Zero?”

“Please stop. This isn’t a joke,” Snake responded, shaking his head. “I kept quiet earlier since I believed that if I waited, Zero would soon make another announcement.”

Everyone shot a confused glance at Snake.

“Do you... know something?” Ace asked.

“Yes, as a matter of fact.”

“What?”

“Take a look at this,” Snake said, pulling out a card out of his jacket pocket. He presented it to Ace.

Ace took the card into his hands, examining both sides of it carefully. “I see. Well, I can’t do anything with this.”

“Old man, give it here.” Seven snatched the card from Ace’s grasp. “Huh? What the hell is this?”

Seven tossed the card to me.

“This is...” The card had a bunch of bumpy dots on it. “...Braille?”

“Yes, that’s right. Can you read it?”

“Sorry, but I can’t.” I tilted my head and passed the card back to Snake.

“So? What is it?” Lotus asked impatiently.

“I found it inside of my pocket when I woke up on this ship. I believe it is a message from Zero,” Snake said calmly.

Other than Santa, the rest of us expressed shock and approached closer to Snake.

“What’s it say?” Seven asked. He seemed poised to swipe the card at any moment.

“Just a moment. I will read it out loud.”

Snake moved his fingertips across the card and started reading in a calm voice.

You who possess the [2] bracelet.

You are afflicted with blindness.

For that reason, I will grant you special information to you and you alone.

This information concerns the <RED> and <DEAD> devices.

<RED> refers to “Recognition Device” - in other words, it is able to sense your bracelets.

There will always be one of these devices installed next to each numbered door.

Additionally, <DEAD> stands for “Deactivation Device.”

These are installed on the other side of each numbered door, and serves to stop the time bomb mechanism.

“...Time bomb mechanism?” I gazed at the bracelet strapped around my left wrist.

Snake continued reading.

This information may come as a surprise for you.

At this moment, you (and the people whom you shall come to meet) have small bomb capsules planted within your bodies.

While you all were unconscious, I had you all ingest these bombs.

By the time you all awoke, they would have already passed through your stomachs and reached your small intestines.

Therefore, it is pointless to try and forcefully expel them.

Give up on trying to do so.

Meanwhile, as I mentioned earlier, the bracelets on your left wrists also function as a time bomb mechanism.

They serve as timers that can detonate the small bombs.

Regardless of whoever passes through a numbered door, the detonation countdown will start immediately afterwards.

The time limit is 81 seconds.

If you do nothing, your bracelets will transmit a signal to the bombs in your bodies after 81 seconds, and your bodies will burst into countless pieces.

To stop the detonation, everyone who authenticated their bracelets on the <RED> must also scan their bracelets on the <DEAD>.

After scanning, once the lever on the side of the device is pulled, the detonation countdown will stop.

Naturally, those who do not scan their bracelets on the <RED> will be unable to use the <DEAD>.

Therefore, if any of those people pass through the doors, after 81 seconds, they will meet their certain death by means of explosion.

Incidentally, once a door is opened, it will close automatically after nine seconds.

Be warned that the <DEAD> will not function as long as these doors are still open.

In other words, after passing through a door, you will be unable to block the door from closing with any items.

This concludes the explanation of the <RED> and the <DEAD> system.

How you use this information is up to you. Even to kill if you wish.

By utilizing this information, you may also be able to eliminate any problematic individuals from this game.

I wish you the best of luck.

After finishing reading, Snake returned the card to his pocket.

It was a long note, but I tried summarizing it in my mind. Only the team who authenticates their bracelets on the <RED> may pass through a numbered door. Not one team member could fail to pass through the door, and adding another person was also out of the question. The <RED> and <DEAD> system was put in place to enforce that rule - in other words, the devices served the role of a judge.

“I don’t like how this sounds. I can’t get this thing off at all.” Lotus grew flustered as she tried pulling off her bracelet with great force.

Ace and Seven had stiff expressions on their faces and stared at their abdomens.

Clover looked dumbfounded and stared straight off into space.

Akane hugged her bracelet close to her chest, as if it were a precious memento.

“Better not pull at it too hard. Might cause the detonator to malfunction and blow your body to smithereens,” Santa mumbled, shooting a glance at Lotus.

“Wha-... No, I can’t stand this!” Lotus screamed.

Santa only gazed coldly at her. His calmness surprised me, as he didn’t seem perturbed in the slightest even after hearing the contents of Snake’s note.

I stared at my own bracelet. The metallic frame glimmered dimly in the light. I rubbed my stomach.

A bomb inside me, huh...

Thinking that, I lost my grasp on life. Fear completely enveloped me, as if rising up from my feet, spreading throughout my body.

Why must Zero put on this stupid game...

“Can I ask just one more time?” I said glancing around at everyone, unable to calm my frustration. “Is there really nobody here who knows anything about Zero?”

Everyone stayed silent and looked around at each other. It seemed as if whoever knew something was quietly assessing the situation.

Was I the only one who knew nothing?

At this rate, I would end up suspicious of everyone and everything.

“I... I saw Zero’s silhouette. When I was abducted,” Lotus answered quietly. “But I didn’t see his face. He had on a gas mask.”

However, nobody reacted to Lotus’s revelation.

“What’s with this apathy?” Lotus asked, pouting her lips as if she wasn’t satisfied with the response. “Is that all? I was expecting something more... you know, like shock or -”

“Well, I saw it too,” Clover said, hugging her knees.

“And I as well. Now that you mention it, he was wearing a gas mask,” Ace added.

“Same here. I was just sittin’ and watchin’ TV, when suddenly that guy in a gas mask showed up outta nowhere,” Seven snorted.

“No way. Even a big guy like you was taken so easily?” Lotus responded in shock.

“Not like I could’ve done anything. Once I had a whiff of that white smoke, it was lights out in seconds,” Seven retorted, seemingly irritated. He must have been frustrated with the fact that he got abducted without being able to put up a fight.

All of their abductions sounded pretty much the same as mine. Everyone was taken while at home. It was the middle of the night. A figure presumed to be Zero showed up wearing a gas mask. Everyone fell unconscious upon breathing in the white smoke, and they all found themselves lying in one of the cabins on D-Deck upon waking up.

Our stories about what had happened after we awoke matched up as well. The door in each of our cabins had our bracelet number painted on it, and all of the others had escaped using the key card hanging around their necks. Only I had the misfortune of dropping my key and almost drowning in the process.

“June, were you also attacked by a man in a gas mask?” I asked. She was staring down at the ground, looking completely exhausted as if her fever hadn’t gone down.

“I... I can’t remember,” Akane responded. Her empty stare was broken only by her continued blinking. “When I woke up, I was lying on the top of a triple bunk bed. When I try to think about what happened before that, a sharp pain shoots through my head, like it’s going to erupt.”

After saying that, her face twisted in pain. “I... I don’t know what’s happening to me. Recently, my memory has been getting all fuzzy at times... Sometimes I even forget what I’m doing.”

After hearing her words, Seven reacted in shock and looked straight at her.

“Seven, what’s wrong?” Akane asked.

“N-Nothing. Forget about it.” Seven shook his head. “Santa, you also catch a glimpse of the man in the gas mask?”

Santa had remained silent throughout our conversation, staring blankly into space. I slowly approached him.

“Yeah. Same as everyone else,” Santa simply replied.

“Snake, how ‘bout you?” Seven asked.

“Well, with the way that I am, I couldn't have possibly seen our abductor’s face. However, if Clover says that she saw the man in the gas mask, then the circumstances of my abduction must be the same as everyone else’s,” Snake responded while touching his hair. “After all, Clover and I were abducted together.”

Only Seven and Lotus were surprised at Snake’s declaration. Like me, everyone else had a faint idea of what was going on.

“I would have liked to keep it a secret, but any undue suspicions would only serve to complicate matters further, so I will reveal it. Clover and I are siblings.”

“Snake’s my big brother, and I’m his little sister... though that must be obvious, right?” Clover added. Her expression softened, as if she felt relieved at being able to call Snake “brother” openly once again.

“Siblings...? R-Really?” Lotus stuttered, her mouth flapping like that of a dying goldfish.

“Is it really something to be surprised about?” Snake asked.

“Well, saying that so suddenly... Anyone would get surprised.”

“Why? There are others here who were previously acquainted,” Snake said, pointing at Akane and me.

“That’s right. Didn’t you say you were childhood friends?” Ace asked.

“Yes... Well, we went to the same elementary school...” Akane started saying, before turning to me as if she were troubled by something. Feeling somewhat embarrassed, I started scratching my forehead.

“Outta the nine of us captured, two siblings, and two childhood friends. There’s gotta be somethin’ in there that’ll lead us to Zero’s identity, right?” Seven suggested. “Lookin’ for connections between victims will link back to possible suspects. It’s a basic tenet of criminal investigation.”

I thought Seven was all brawn and no brains, but for once he said something wise.

“I see. So we should therefore be seeking a ‘missing link’ between us.” Snake placed his hand on his chin and appeared to be contemplating something. “There must be something that connects all of us. If we find that, we’ll be able to-”

“But just look at our ages and genders... We obviously come from different walks of life, don’t you think? I can’t possibly begin to imagine how we could be connected,” Lotus interrupted.

“What about where we live?” Clover proposed.

One by one, we started listing out our places of residence. It turned out that we all lived in the greater Kanto area around Tokyo, but that couldn’t necessarily be called a missing link. After all, if we didn’t all live in the same general region, there would be no possible way for anyone to abduct all of us in the span of one night.

“Isn’t it impossible for a single person to capture all of us? This has to be the work of some organization,” Lotus said fearfully, rubbing her upper arm to calm herself. “Zero must be the representative or symbol of a group.”

“What sorta organization?” Seven snorted.

“An army or a research facility or something... I can think of several other possibilities too.”

“A research facility? That sounds plausible,” Ace added. “We might be test subjects of some psychological experiment.”

“This must be one fucked-up experiment then.” Seven shot a glance towards the [5] door and balled up his fist. “One of us is dead.”

Seven’s words weighed heavily on my mind and body. Everyone else should have felt the same way. Suddenly, the air surrounding us grew stagnant and heavy.

“As the older lady suggested, I think that the probability of an organization being behind this is high,” Snake said.

“Older lady... Are you talking about me?” Lotus asked, raising one eyebrow.

“However,” Snake continued, “I believe that we must not discount the possibility of this being the work of a single individual.”

“You really think one person was able to do all of this? There’s no way,” Lotus scoffed.

“Why do you doubt that?” Snake responded. “With proper preparation, it would be easy to avoid detection by others, and carrying our unconscious bodies to a car would not be difficult either. A large enough car could probably hold all nine of us at once, so there’s no reason to question the possibility.”

“Why would someone go so far as to rent out this ship? The devices installed on the doors, the detonation bracelets around our wrists, the capsule-sized bombs in our stomachs... Are you saying that one person made all of that?”

“There are individuals in the world who possess wealth beyond imagination.”

“Why would some rich guy need to start this crazy game?”

“...Entertainment.” The mumble came from Santa, who remained slightly separated from the group. “The guy could just be doing all of this for his own pleasure out of boredom. Drinking wine and enjoying watching us suffer and die.”

Santa’s suggestion sent shivers down my spine. There’s no way, I thought, but I couldn’t laugh it off.

“I dunno what kind of person Zero is, but he’s gotta be a lunatic,” Seven spat.

“If an organization is behind this... then that goes for all of them involved,” Lotus added. I nodded.

Next: Part 2, Chapters 8-9

[petite-neko]

Expect the Unexpected

Fanfiction: Expect the Unexpected Story Summary: When Sabo received a letter from a girl in the middle of the Grandline, he wasn’t too sure what he was expecting. But whatever it was, it most certainly wasn’t this. Characters: Sabo, Moda, Anne, (Ace, Koala) Pairing: Moda/Ace I guess (her age is unknown, she’s an adult here though) Rating: PG Warnings: one minor swear, Universe Alteration, OC, mention of character death A/N: HAPPY BIRTHDAY @wolfliorchi !!!! This is dedicated to you because you were totally there and we just ranted off ideas about this UA together when I couldn’t sleep. And holy fuck this is long.

In case anybody is wondering this is related to this here. (Link leads to the tag revolving around this UA)

Read on Ao3

“Sabo!”

The revolutionary turned to a man waving a letter while running in his direction.

The man hunched over from his sprint before holding out the paper in his head. “This is for you. I received it from a young lady. She says it’s urgent and concerns your brother.”

Luffy? Why would anybody have something urgent concerning Luffy? Was somebody after him or something? He was fine – asleep but fine – when he left him in Dressrosa so…?

“You know,” Koala nudged his rib, only to go through him with a soft curse. “It could be a trap Sabo.”

He supposed that it could be, but still… what was this thing concerning Luffy he just had to know…

He took the paper and Koala just sighed.

“Sabo! It was just a few days ago that the paper declared you Luffy’s brother! Don’t you think the timing is too appropriate?”

Sabo ignored her as he read over the letter. It was brief, and nothing too revealing was inside of it. It mentioned needing assistance from the army, requesting him but if he had other matters she’d understand, but she simply had nobody else she could trust and that the matter at hand was far too sensitive to put on paper. It also outlined the urgency of the matter. The other thing too was the writing was… shaky. Messy almost, but not due to lack of discipline.

“Koala, I can’t just say no.”

“Ah! Sabo!” She called after him as he walked towards a ship.

This was their purpose. This was what they were here for. They were the revolutionary army and…

“This is our jobs. She doesn’t just want me, she wants our help.”

“But she still wants you! I’m telling you Sabo! This is a trap!”

Sabo groaned and tossed the letter at her. “Just read the damn letter and you’ll understand.”

Now… what was that island called again?

.xxx.

It was a small town and Sabo looked down at the paper that was his map so to speak.

Follow the river that flows through the town downstream for a few miles, there you will come across a small farm…

Koala had insisted on following him – worried as she was over the fact that this might be a trap. (And never mind her scolding of how he needs to act accordingly since he had such a high standing in the revolutionary army. This was family business damnit!)

She was far enough not to be noticed – thankfully – although close enough to help if need be.

Granted, he didn’t blame her for worrying. It was suspicious but…

Ah, there it was, the farm. It was modest, a few cows, some crops… nothing on a grand scale. Perhaps enough to keep one fed with some spare change on the side.

There was nobody in the fields. The house then?

So Sabo approached the door and knocked on it.

There was the patter of feet rushing to the door.

“Anne!” A woman’s voice called out, away from the door, and the sound or more feet approached the door. “How many times have I told you not to open the door!”

When it opened, a small girl was smiling up at him, her freckled cheeks still chubby with baby fat. If he had to guess, he would say she was one or two years old…

There was something about her though… as if he recognised her. (But how? How could he recognise a mere child whom he never met?) And her name… it, too, seemed to ring a bell…

”Oi! Sabo! Didja know if I was born a girl, I’d be named Anne?” A freckled face snickered at him. “But really, can you imagine? Me? A girl?”

Sabo stared at the child. No way. No fucking way…

(But the child certainly looked old enough…)

“I’m so sorry! She is just gaining a sense of independence and she isn’t listening lately!” That was presumable her mother rushing on over, arms still covered in soap. “I—Oh!”

This was Moda. The woman who wrote him the letter. The modest farm owner.

But Sabo couldn’t be bothered to spare anymore of a glance at her no, his gaze kept going back to this child. Anne.

Anne.

This couldn’t just be a coincidence. No, the resemblance was there. He could recognise it. Remember it. She was the spitting image of him. Of her father. Well, except for the strawberry blonde hair. (Which was more strawberry than blonde mind you) The shape of her eyes, too, was softer, but the determined, confident expression in her eyes was definitely the same.

“It’s no fault of yours.” He said and removed his hat, inclining a little. And that independence… most definitely… “She takes after her father. May I come in?”

Moda gasped slightly before rapidly nodded, ushering her little one inside.

This wasn’t about Luffy, no. This was about Ace.

(As the door closed behind them, he could almost hear Koala’s temper tantrum.) 

.xxx.

“It wasn’t planned.”

Moda broke the silence that had settled between the two of them. She had served some tea while Anne played with her toys and ran about the house.

She was nervous, and Sabo didn’t blame her. Her supposed in-laws were wanted criminals – a pirate and revolutionary – after all. She didn’t know him.

“I had found him one day in the river…” She was playing with her skirt. “He had been injured, drowning… and I rescued him. He spent the next few days recovering and… well. We got to know one another, and enjoyed each others company.”

Sabo listened in silence. He would let her get her story out. This had to have been tough…

“We never thought anything of it, and he left, delivering a message to my parents. By the time I realised it… he had already…”

And the two of them glanced at the innocent toddler, finding amusement in arching her toy up in the air.

Innocent, oh so innocent…

“I’m presuming nobody knows?” He finally added. It was only natural considering that she couldn’t even risk writing it down on paper.

She shook her head.

“No, nobody. When I found out I… Well.” She clutched at her dress now. “I knew that I couldn’t reveal who her father was. Not after… I couldn’t let what happened to him happen to her. So I created a façade. I made my parents believe her father is some wandering merchant. I gushed and gushed about this handsome travelling merchant enough times that they just presumed…” She sighed and let go of her skirt. “Because I knew if people put enough things together they would suspect…”

“Suspect?”

“…My parents work for G2. I asked if Ace would deliver a message to them and…”

Ah, yes it would only be logical that the Marines would jump to that conclusion…

“I can’t protect her if people found out. I’m not strong enough… I’m not connected in the right places… so I created that cover story. But I’m afraid… What if? I keep asking myself. And I only come to the same conclusion: He would eliminate her. And nobody would stop him.”

Sabo nodded. Sakazuki would most definitely do that if he received word that Ace might have a child…

“And so,” He concluded, “you asked me to come here so I can protect her.”

“I-well…” She shook her head a bit. “I actually wanted to see if you could get a hold of Luffy. I figured that, maybe, you might also be Ace’s… but worse come worse I knew you could get a hold of Luffy and…” She sighed before smiling a sad smile. “Anne, come here honey.”

The little girl looked at her mother before rushing over, toy clasped against her body, eyes wide. “Yes Mama?”

And Moda picked up her daughter and placed her in her lap. “Anne, this is your uncle Sabo. He’s your Papa’s brother.”

“Papa?” The girl’s eyes sparked. “Mama says little about Papa.”

Moda was stroking her daughter’s hair. “I know honey, I know. Can you say it Moda? Can you say Un-cle Sa-bo?”

“N-cull Sa-po…” Her face contorted a little in frustration and she repeated, not getting a much better result.

Sabo laughed softly and leaned in. “It’s okay Anne, we’ll work on it. You’ll get better.”

Ah, she was adorable. His niece. His niece.

(It only ignited a metaphorical flame in his stomach. This was completely unfair. No child should have to fear for their life. No mother should have to fear for their child. Blood did not make one’s life. Guilt was not inherited.)

“So…” He said and looked back up at Moda. “What do you intend to do? What do you want me to do?”

“I did it before, and I can do it now…” She started. “I’m going to build a memorial. I’m going to tell my parents, and therefore the marines, that Anne had a fever for a few days, and then one day she was… gone.” Moda leaned down and kissed the crown of her daughter. “It’s not a lie.” She explained shakily. “You can build a memorial for somebody who isn’t dead. And she was suffering from a fever last week… and she’ll be gone… if you’ll take her. One didn’t necessarily cause the other though. But they will presume. It isn’t that uncommon that a child dies from illness in their first few years of life after all. And that, combined with my mourning of my lost child… nobody will question it.”

A smart woman. A smart determined woman. He could see just what Ace saw in her…

She was filled with it. She would do anything it took to save her child. She would be sad, but the pride in knowing her child was safe and secure was worth every tear…

He sighed.

“…You do realise though, if I take her, she’ll most likely be raised to become a revolutionary, and we aren’t exactly on the best of terms with the government, right?”

“Better her become wanted for what she has done versus wanted for who she is!”

And there, Moda’s voice became passionate, and that determination only hardened her eyes. Honest, she was truly honest. “Better for her to live than to die as a toddler because the government doesn’t want to let a certain bloodline to survive!”

“…Mama?”

Did Anne know they were talking about her? About her future?

A sob left Moda as she held her child tightly.

“I’s okay Mama.” She whispered with a slight slur, patting Moda’s back. “I’s okay.”

“Thank you honey…” She whispered back. After a few emotionally tense moments she looked back up at Sabo, that determination still there. “I don’t want to, but I have to.”

Sabo smiled sadly, tugging on his hat. “I know, I was just ensuring. The last thing the revolutionary army needs right now is a mother claiming we stole her child to the marines.”

Moda only nodded. “No – I understand. You… don’t even know me and…”

Sabo laughed softly, shaking his head. “Please, please, it’s not like that.” He explained and ruffled her hair like he would Luffy’s. “I know just how much you care for little Anne here, and what lengths you would go for her, but… if you wanted her back… I was just ensuring that, yes, you truly believed this was the best path for her. If I am to do as you ask me to, I need your full cooperation. I can’t have you doubting or regretting your actions weeks, months, even years down the line. One slip up could spell disaster for you, her, and the revolutionary army.”

Moda looked at him incredulously. “You don’t doubt me?”

He could only laugh again. “If you ever knew Ace as a kid, you’d know she’s the spitting image of him. I’d be willing to bet she has quite the temper too.”

Anne stuck her tongue out at him.

Yup, that was Ace’s daughter alright.

“So… you’ll take her?”

Sabo nodded. “She’s family after all. What kind of brother would I be if I didn’t ensure my little adorable niece lives a fulfilling, full life?” He smiled at them. “Ah… I’ll leave you to get yourselves organised now.”

He closed the door behind him with a heavy sigh.

Ace’s daughter huh…? Who would’ve figured…?

Sabo held out his hand, letting a flame dance in his hand. He might not have been there for Ace, but he’d be damned if he wasn’t there for his daughter!

.xxx.

“Mama do Anne hafta go bye bye?”

Sabo looked at the torn child.

“Unfortunately yes, but Uncle Sabo will be there for you, okay honey? It’s not safe with Mama anymore, but Uncle Sabo will keep you safe.”

“Dun wanna Mama…”

Sabo knelt in front of Anne, placing his hand on her shoulder. He felt for the child, he really did. “Hey, Anne, maybe one day when it’s safer, I’ll bring you to see Mama for a bit. How’s that? I know it’s hard to leave family… but I’m family too.”

She turned and looked up at him with sad but hopeful eyes. “Really ‘Ncle Sapo?”

Sabo smiled back, trying not to laugh at his mutilated name. “I’ll try my hardest, okay? I can’t say for sure, but I’ll do my best. Nobody knows what tomorrow is but we can try!” He ruffled her hair before grinning at her, continuing in a hushed tone. “And hey, think of it like you’re a big girl now ‘kay? That what you’re doing is protecting Mama and keeping her safe, okay?”

Those eyes went wide again. “…Mama not safe?”

Sabo shook his head. “Anne isn’t either. Not while Anne stays with Mama. But if Anne comes with Uncle Sabo, Anne is keeping Mama and Anne safe.”

And she nodded enthusiastically. “Okay! Anne keep Mama safe!”

He read the lips of Moda as she thanked him. And he held out his hand before a small one was placed in his.

“Oh!” Moda said hurriedly. “I almost forgot… ah I never knew which to use but… what do you think Ace would have preferred? Gol D. or Portgas D? I never knew for certain, so I held off on fully naming her…”

Sabo laughed softly. This was easy. “Portgas D. Definitely.”

Moda smiled back. “I figured as much. Portgas D. Anne it is.”

And Sabo looked down at those curious, wide eyes. “But that’s a secret, okay Anne?”

And they brightened up before she nodded.

Portgas D. Anne huh? The most wanted 15 month old in the world.

It just didn’t know that yet. (And hopefully never will…)

[nofomoartworld]

Hyperallergic: An Undocumented Artist Shares Her Experience of Alienation in the US

Arleene Correa “Estado Santuario (Sanctuary State)” (2017) 11 x 15 inches, pigs blood on mounted watercolor paper, (all images courtesy the artist)

At a recent talk at Postmaster’s Gallery, I happened to fall into conversation with a woman who identified herself as Arleene Correa, a student at California College of the Arts and an undocumented resident of the US. I met Correa because she is participating in an artist residency program that has brought her to NYC for a semester.

On finding out that Correa was here in the country outside of the official apparatus for immigration and residency I was immediately interested in talking with her about her experience — especially given the current administration’s hostility toward immigrants, in particular those from Mexico and Muslim-majority countries.

Correa’s family is originally from Mexico. She was born there to a father who worked intermittently in the US, and her parents brought her to California in 1997, when she was three. Correa has four siblings, and two of them are also undocumented. In the following conversation I find out what her experience has been in the arts community in California, and why she has decided to out herself.

The following has been edited for brevity.

*          *          *

Arleene Correa: Hello?

Seph Rodney: Hey, Arleene. [You are attending] California College of the Arts, right? You were about to get into what your experience has been like there as an undocumented person.

AC: I mean, what do you want me to talk about? Because there’s so much. I can start with the process of applying to art school and how that was?

SR: Great. Please do.

Arleene Correa “Te Perdono (I Forgive You)” (2017) 11 x 15 inches, pigs blood on mounted watercolor paper

AC: [It] was a huge mess, and I did it by myself with no help. Previous to CCA, I was at a community college in Napa Valley. There was always help for people to transfer to other schools; there were counselors, but nobody ever knew how to deal with an undocumented student. It was almost as if they didn’t even encourage me to move forward because there was just no knowledge of how that would even happen.

The process of me applying to CCA was my jumping into it full force and saying, “I want this; I have to make this happen.” The first time I applied to CCA I was accepted, but CCA is extremely expensive, and I couldn’t afford it. This was before the Dream Act was in place, so there was absolutely no financial aid given to undocumented students.

When I was at the community college, I was paying for that all out of pocket, which was an expense, but it was still possible … about $500 a semester. I believe the tuition for CCA per semester is somewhere around $23,000–$25,000.

SR: Wow.

AC: When I applied and I was accepted, they said, “Well, how do you want to pay for this?” I was just like, “Well, I can’t write you a check.” I explained to them my situation, and they said, “We don’t know what to do about that. You have to try to get a scholarship or something.”

I had to defer, and for a whole year I dedicated myself to figuring out how I could have tuition paid for at CCA. Then Obama enacted the Dream Act, which allowed undocumented students in California to receive the Cal Grant. I would call the Cal Grant office almost every day and ask for help. I’ve always kept a GPA of a 4.0, so having a higher GPA allows you for a higher scholarship through Cal Grant. Even then it was just extremely difficult because the office didn’t know how to deal with me either. They were like, “You know, do you have a Social Security number? Like, what is the deal with this and this and that?” It was always led from one person to another to another. It was just this almost never ending circle.

I also wasn’t fully embracing being undocumented, so it was something I rarely talked about. During that year I decided if I want to get anywhere, I have to be completely open about who I am and where I come from and what I want to do. The following year I reapplied to CCA, and I was very aggressive, I guess you can say, in my portfolio and in my written paper. I addressed all of my issues, and I said, “You know, I have no money. I don’t come from a wealthy family, but I have this passion. And I’m undocumented, and this is what fuels my passion to create art, because ideally there’s this dream of changing the world through art.”

Again, it was all by myself. There were no counselors. There were no programs to help. I’ve looked back now, and I’m just like, how did I get through all that? It seems impossible to jump through all the hoops, especially when you don’t have a Social Security number and nobody can find you in the records and nobody has a record of you and you’re just this invisible person.

The process of getting to art school was extremely difficult, but once I pushed through that I was able to receive the highest scholarship that CCA offers. They call it [the] Diversity Scholarship. Essentially, I was accepted because I am different from everybody else.

Arleene Correa “Soy Humana, No Soy Illegal (I Am Not Illegal, I Am Human)” (2017) 11 x 15 inches, pigs blood on mounted watercolor paper

SR: Okay. You were saying to me last week that you didn’t feel very supported by your professors.

AC: Oh no, definitely not.

SR: Can you talk about that a bit?

AC: Yeah, of course. Since I do talk about the social-political weather that we are in in my work and it is extremely aggressive, I paint with blood, pigs’ blood, and I make these socially unaccepted paintings — I guess you could call them. In the process of this, especially at CCA, it felt like there was absolutely no support for what I was doing.

I created work, and asked if I could display it at the school. They allowed me to use a hall in our San Francisco campus. When the work was up, nobody talked about it. The faculty ignored it. They would walk by it every single day, and nobody would say anything. It was discouraging because anytime that any student puts up work in our name, the school and the faculty, the painting department, everybody, they’re documenting the artwork and sharing it with people and on social media. My work was actually up for an entire month, and while it was up none of my professors talked about it. Nobody acknowledged it. Everybody just pretended it wasn’t there.

It’s just always felt like I know that I have been pushing boundaries with my work because work like this is not created often. It feels like I’m alone most of the time. The response that I get even in critiques from professors and from other students is that I should be making work that is more beautiful. They don’t necessarily discourage political work, but once it’s there, they want a certain format so that it follows what’s accepted.

Arleene Correa “El Jefe De Deportaciones (The Chief of Deportations)” (2016) soft ground etching and pig’s blood on BFK Rives paper 22 x 30 inches

SR: You’re saying that because you’re making work that isn’t aesthetically pleasing that you’re being ignored. You’ve concluded that this is based on what? On your being undocumented or the kind of work that you make or a combination?

AC: I think it’s just based that there’s a lot of disconnect. People don’t know how to understand the work because they don’t understand my position. I think anytime that you’re dealing with culturally charged work there is a sense of almost not being able to criticize it or talk about it.

I mean, I hate to use this example, but the white man does not understand the struggles of a colored person. Therefore, when I present this work, they’re just like okay, it’s there and we see it, but they can’t talk about it. They can’t discuss it any further because it’s so culturally charged, and it’s something that they lack that it doesn’t allow for a connection to be established. [There is] a lot of critique on the technicalities of drawing and painting, the presentation, more so than the content and meaning. That usually never gets discussed.

SR: What brought your father and mother from Mexico to the States?

Arleene Correa “Es Tu Decision (It Is Your Choice)” (2016) pig’s blood, gold leaf, photo transfers and India ink on watercolor paper, 83 x 42 inches

AC: My father had come for work once, and he always talked about how it was easier to make money here. He never liked the idea of staying here permanently until 1997 [when] my parents decided financially and for security purposes it was the best thing to do for the family, which I don’t understand because the whole process of us getting here was extremely risky.

My mother actually handed my two siblings and I over to a woman she didn’t know. They’re called coyotes. She handed us over to her on the Mexican side, and she took us into a car and brought us over to the US as if we were her children. Then my mother and father crossed the desert and walked until they got to the US border and came over on this side. My mother said, “You know, I hoped to see you on the other side, but I never knew if I really would.”

SR: I want to get on to what you would you like to see accomplished through your education and your art practice.

AC: I’m [with] 17 other people that have absolutely no idea what my life is like. There is no way that I can explain to them the privilege that I feel for being undocumented and being poor, because this life has allowed me insight into humanity [that] you can’t buy.

My dream is for my work to take on some of that experience and share that with others and allow [people] to see that undocumented people are human and that we are not defined by our legal status. When I moved here to New York I met someone, and they asked me what I did. I said, “I’m an artist, and I talk about politics, and I talk a lot about immigration mostly.” They said, “Oh, well, how would you know?” I said, “Well, I’m undocumented.” They looked at me and they said, “Oh, you’re one of those illegals. I’ve never met one of those. I can’t believe I’m talking to an illegal,” as if I was not a real person. I have never felt so devalued. I have never felt like, I was an alien from a different world. It was devastating but also extremely motivating because those are the types of people that I hope to reach

Arleene Correa, “El Mangonero (The Mango Man )” (2017) 26 x 32 inches, Conte crayons on brown paper

SR: One more question: Why are you willing to sort of come out of the closet and declare publicly that you are undocumented?

AC: If I’m being a 100% honest, I have felt miserable my entire life. I have felt like I have never been seen for the person that I am, and I have nothing to lose. There is nothing to lose anymore because we are living in a time where my existence is not validated, so coming out and showing the world who I am is the least that I could do. It’s an honor to be able to say that I’ve made it this far and that there is a Mexican artist who is not afraid. I’m not afraid. There is nothing I’m afraid of because I’ve basically already lived the worst.

SR: When we first spoke that you told me that you were in the process of becoming documented because you are married to an American citizen.

AC: That’s correct, yes. A lot of people have the idea that undocumented people don’t try to get citizenship, and that is, I think, one of the biggest misconceptions. It’s not like there wasn’t any effort. It’s just the system is so messed up that there is no opportunity. There is almost no humanity behind this system of immigration.

SR: Thank you.

The post An Undocumented Artist Shares Her Experience of Alienation in the US appeared first on Hyperallergic.

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