#comrade found a particularly bad one and I fucking snapped

[ranboo5]

Listen we all joke, I definitely joke (a while ago I made a post -- long since deleted bc of this exact thing -- saying smth along the lines of “are you a Boreal fan or are you socially normal,” referencing the fact that a lot of ppl who like the Boreal lads including myself are nd in a way that affects social capacity, and relate to them for that reason), but can we talk about how absolutely fucking disgusting the trend of “I call you out based on your favorite DSMP characters lol :)” has gotten 

People r really out here making lists that fucking try to deeply psychoanalyze utter fucking strangers based on fictional characters they like and when you go in to make like a full psychological breakdown that’s not a Quick Joke anymore that’s you being arrogant and audacious and incredibly, incredibly insensitive. It is not your goddamn place to call people toxic or hypocrites or ABUSERS (all straight up things I have seen!) because they like or relate to a fictional character. You cannot discern someone’s trauma from this, it is in no way your place to assign and attempt to untangle complexes, and they’re also just entirely the fuck off base 99% of the goddamn time 

What makes people think it is okay to do this? In what fucking world, in what fucking paradigm, is it okay to say that kind of shit to a complete stranger in literally any circumstance? Contrary to popular belief, one can like and relate to a character in a lot of different ways, and there’s no way to predict how they do and how they interface with it in relation to their REAL FUCKING LIFE from solely the knowledge of that fictional character, and when you assume there is to the point of writing deeply personal and insensitive psychological profile “callouts” for people? It is not funny. It is not fun. It is not cute. It is awful and presumptive. You are literally just being invasive and cruel and then going “oh it’s all a joke :) it’s all in good fun” like no!! It stopped being in good fun when it stopped being about you!!! It stopped being in good fun when it started being hyperspecific!!!! And by the time people were claiming to specify strangers’ trauma and maladaptive coping mechanisms based on how they relate to a fictional character, we had all long stopped fucking laughing.

You are not a fucking psychologist. You are not a fucking psychic. You are a 14 year old “empath” on TikTok with no comprehension of parasocial relationships and if you treat people like this you are not going to keep your friendships  

[mello-jello]

hi jello!! what about post timeskip levihan? commander hanji is working very hard and rarely, rarely sleeps (let alone eats and bathes properly. its worse than before now though.).

what if one time levi discovers hanji passed tf out due to sheer exhaustion in the most weird and random of places. he doesn’t want to wake them up bc hanji def needs the rest so he carries/tucks her into bed.🥺❤️

JAZZY thank you for the prompt! I kind of combined it with this one too:

Thank you, Anon!

Preview:

Hange gave a small laugh before saying, “Thank you Levi, I feel much better now.”

“Tch, you haven’t even done what we came here to do,” Levi scoffed.

Hange made a confused sound.

“Drop the dish.”

It had been 3 years since Shiganshina. Levi climbed into the carriage and sat across from Hange, who was still reading through her notes from the long and grueling meeting that lasted for the better part of the day. All the highest ranking military officials had been called to the capital to discuss Paradis’s best course of action. Queen historia was there, along with her staff, advisors, and of course Zackley. Levi had been to plenty of these meetings before, but this time was different in a bit of a distressing way.

Over the years, Levi had watched Erwin defend the scouts countless times. From questionable means of gathering information, to explaining away hundreds of lives lost, he always had an answer for everything and he always managed to leave with a favourable image. It was something Levi truly admired and even envied about Erwin.

But now he had been watching Hange flounder. She has indeed improved over the last 3 years, but she still doubts herself and while it might not be known to those around her, Levi can’t help but feel sympathetic to her situation. Today however, the other officials had been particularly ruthless.

“Take a break, Hange,” Levi ordered. Hange just sighed. Then her stomach growled. “Have you eaten today?”

“Uuuuuuuhhh,” Hange mused as she genuinely struggled to remember.

“Tch, there’s your answer,” Levi crossed his arms. The rest of the officials had a big dinner scheduled for tonight, but of course the Survey Corps got shafted and had to leave early in order to prepare. Hange met his eyes again with an exhausted look he was all too familiar with.

“How have you been sleeping?”

“Not great,” she admitted. Levi’s stomach sank. He had dealt with his own insomnia his whole life, but it seems worse on Hange. Perhaps it was the stark contrast from her former bubbly and loud personality. Hange pinched the bridge of her nose and let out another long sigh. Levi couldn’t help feeling inadequate and helpless. He rarely got himself to sleep, how could he help Hange?

Levi looked out the window at the setting sun when he got an idea. He realized what Hange had been neglecting while trying to be a good commander. Something that wasn’t just eating and sleeping. Something that was unique to Hange.

“Hange, there’s one more thing you need to do before we leave.”

Hange raised an eyebrow.

Levi told the driver to wait for them and escorted Hange to the dining hall.

“Levi, we were technically invited, but I don’t think showing up for food after we already said goodbye is a very good look for us,” Hange practically whispered.

Levi opened the doors and they were greeted with a sweet aroma of bread, appetizers, and whatever was going to be the main dish. Hange’s mouth watered. The long elegant table was decorated with ornate candles, beautiful china, crystal glasses, and there were 4 sets of cutlery for each place setting.

“Relax, they won’t be here just yet. They will all be busy getting dressed for dinner.”

Hange grabbed a bread roll and took a huge bite, not bothering to chew before she commented, “I never understood ‘dressing for dinner’ ugh. What’s the point?”

Levi was about to make a half hearted comment about how Hange could never fit in with “civilized” society, but he stopped himself when he saw she was eating and was a little bit more relaxed. He found a small plate of savoury looking appetizers and handed it to her. She immediately took one.

“MMM, Levi!” she exclaimed, pointing at the plate. She popped another in her mouth before saying, “you gotta try these!”

Levi put up a hand and said, “you enjoy.”

Hange enthusiastically cleared the whole platter in less than a minute, and Levi was watching her, endeared at the behaviour. He had missed this side of her. Despite how gross it was, there was a glimpse of the carefree Hange he once knew. A small hint of a smile tugged at the corner of his mouth.

Then Hange belched.

“Disgusting,” Levi waved the air in front of his nose.

Hange gave a small laugh before saying, “Thank you Levi, I feel much better now.”

“Tch, you haven’t even done what we came here to do,” Levi scoffed.

Hange made a confused sound.

“Drop the dish.”

Hange’s one eye widened as she processed what Levi was saying.

“C’mon, you need to blow off some steam. They were total assholes to you today, and for what? You didn’t know the exact amount of your food budget? And yet,” Levi gestured to the banquet. He then picked up a delicate looking wine glass. He held his arm outstretched, and loosened his grip, letting it crash to the ground. “Oops.”

A mischievous smile stretched across Hange’s lips. “Oops,” she mimicked Levi and let the empty platter fall to the floor, breaking into dozens of pieces. She slowly started to lap around the long luxurious set up, like a predator admiring her prey before pouncing.

“Right? And Nile, ugh, what a hypocrite! Giving me shit for not knowing about that small thing, belittling me in front of everyone,” Hange snapped a salad plate against the edge of the table. “It wasn’t too long ago when he would have been the first to admit he had no idea what the first interior squad were up to! We had to find out for ourselves. Erwin was almost hanged!” Hange kicked a chair over on its side.

“Yeah, fuck Nile,” Levi egged her on. He took a seat at the head of the table and started sipping from one of the water glasses.

“Is this his spot?”

Levi shrugged but Hange was already pouring out a glass of wine all over the white seat, staining it a deep crimson. Levi hid his delight behind another sip.

“And did you catch what he said at the end? ‘Some of us have wives to get home to’”, she imitated in a mocking tone as she casually pushed a platter of dumplings off the table. “Yeah, run home, Nile. Run home to Erwin’s SLOPPY SECONDS!”

Levi blew water out of his nose, and before he could react, Hange reached under the short side of the table and flipped it over, sending its contents hurtling across the room. Hange was elated at the result, laughing almost maniacally.

“Idiot,” Levi hissed, grabbing Hange’s wrist and leading her out the side door. He heard footsteps, and so he instinctively dove into nearby shrubbery, taking Hange down with him.

They hid in the bushes for minutes, Levi pressing his hand to suppress Hange’s uncontrollable laughter. It had been so long since she’d laughed like this. It was infectious and Levi might have actually laughed himself, were it not for the fear of getting caught. He had no problem telling the MPs where to shove it, but he didn’t want Hange to get in trouble. Her whole body was convulsing, and it was rattling the leaves around her. Levi used all his body weight to stop her jerky movements.

After about another minute of total silence, Hange tapped Levi’s arm, signalling to let go. He was hesitant, but he obliged. Hange drew a couple deep breaths, fanning herself, trying to calm down from laughing so hard. Levi was transfixed by the way the moonlight danced on her tear-stained face. They stared at each other for a moment before Hange snickered once more, causing Levi to cover her mouth yet again. “You’re impossible,” he said, pushing her head back down.

Once the coast was clear, they ran back to their carriage, hand in hand. Partly because Levi wanted Hange to keep up, and partly because it felt nice to hold her hand. They ducked their heads until they were off of the main roads. A few minutes later, Hange started giggling again.

“What?” Levi asked.

Hange bit her lip playfully as she reached into her coat and pulled out a bottle of expensive wine she must have swiped from the banquet.

Levi rolled his eyes, but couldn’t help his smile. She looked like a child that just got away with stealing more dessert. She looked joyful for the first time in a long time. She yanked out the cork and took a swig before offering the bottle to Levi. He graciously accepted and tasted the wine for himself. It was too sweet for his taste, but he couldn’t deny that it was spectacular.

“That’s nice,” he commented.

“Pfft! It tastes the same as the cheap stuff!” Hange scoffed as she took the bottle back. Any other time, Levi would have teased her and started an argument, but not today. He wanted to cherish this moment. He leaned over to look at the stars through his window. Not a bad ending to an otherwise terrible day.

After Shiganshina, he and Hange had lost so much. Their comrades, friends; life as they knew it had completely changed and they barely had a moment’s breather to come to grips with it all. Levi was unfortunately accustomed to it, but Hange wasn’t. Hange had been so strong through all of this and Levi wanted to find the right words to tell her. Maybe it was the exhaustion they both felt; maybe it was the close proximity, but for some reason, somehow, Levi felt a tiny bit of courage surge through his veins.

“Hey, Hange, I-”

When he turned to look at her, she was fast asleep, neck crooked as she cradled the bottle of wine. Levi smiled at her. She looked peaceful, like she was getting quality sleep. He took the bottle from her arms and gently maneuvered her to a more comfortable, lying down position. He removed his jacket and draped it over her, as a make-shift blanket.

“Goodnight, Four-Eyes,” he mumbled to himself and returned to his seat. Hange slept the whole way home. When they finally arrived in the southern barracks, Levi couldn’t bring himself to wake her up. He quickly ran their luggage up to their rooms, and came back for Hange.

Being as gentle as he could, he scooped up the commander and ignored the curious look he got from the carriage driver. She was taller than him, and her long limbs made the trek a little difficult, but he was determined. Her steady breaths tickled the skin of his neck.

He carried her up the winding staircase and into her quarters. He lowered her on the bed, careful not to go too fast. He cradled her head for a split second longer than he needed too. He took off her long boots one at a time, placing them silently on the floor at the end of the bed. He undid the top two buttons of her jacket and shirt, just for comfort. Then he pulled the blanket up to her chin, and tucked around the sides.

Finally, he removed her glasses and eyepatch, caressing the tender skin underneath. Placing them on her night stand, he got up to leave. The door hinge creaked as he opened it, and Hange stirred.

“Mmm Levi?” She called out.

Levi wasn’t sure if she was actually awake, or if she was sleep-talking. He was still deciding whether he should answer when she continued, “Thank you, Levi. For everything.”

“You too, Hange,” he spoke just above a whisper, as he closed her door.

[panharmonium]

this is their “because we’re the same” moment.

this is kakashi gauging the situation and making a conscious decision to offer up private information about himself, not because it’s something he particularly likes talking about, but because it’s what the kid in front of him needs to hear.  a teacher with poorer instincts might have bristled at sasuke’s behavior, or taken it personally, but kakashi knows better than to react that way.  he isn’t upset by sasuke’s lashing out, and he doesn’t bite back - he stays quiet and collected, and he lets sasuke’s attacks roll off him like water.  then, in the same mild tone as always, he issues a calm correction, while simultaneously offering sasuke an opportunity for connection.

and just like with iruka’s confession to naruto, this connection is successful.  sasuke is visibly, dramatically affected by hearing this.  it snaps him out of his rage, and sends him into a quiet, almost abashed contemplation.

his expression softens.  his anger evaporates.  everything deflates and deescalates.  he stops shouting and starts listening.  this is the first time he’s ever been approached on this subject by somebody who can rightfully claim to know what they’re talking about.  this is the first time sasuke can’t simply discard what’s being said to him because “well, what the hell do they know, anyway?”  this is the first time he’s ever been approached by an adult who a) sees through his ‘perfect student’ act and knows exactly what’s motivating both his past successes and his current crisis, and who b) truly, honestly understands the pain he’s feeling.  

this has NEVER happened to sasuke before.  sasuke is, as far as we can see, left to fend for himself after the uchiha massacre.  he has never had an adult address his issues with him like this, honestly and in plain language and with a kind of steady compassion that is gentle and empathetic without crossing the line into indulgence (which has its place, but which isn’t the kind of guidance sasuke needs right now).  kakashi asks sasuke to hold himself accountable for his actions while at the same time saying “i understand how you feel.  i know how badly it hurts.”  he validates sasuke’s refusal to be lectured by someone who can’t possibly understand what he’s going through, even though it means sharing a piece of his history that he absolutely has not discussed with any of the other kids and that he generally tries to keep private.  he knows sasuke deserves to hear from somebody who Gets It.  he knows sasuke will refuse to listen to anyone who doesn’t get it.  he knows sasuke shouldn’t HAVE to listen to anyone who doesn’t get it - sasuke deserves better than preachy platitudes from people who can’t possibly understand how much pain he’s feeling.  

this is the most important conversation kakashi and sasuke ever have.  it’s not the first time they address this issue - kakashi started his careful foray into the Itachi Waters as far back as their preparations for the final round of the chunin exams - but this is the first time he really dives off the dock, and it’s almost an effective enough attempt to avert disaster.  sasuke stays up in that tree for hours after kakashi leaves, thinking about what he said.  we see how much of a pull sasuke’s “new comrades to help fill the void” have on him, despite how difficult it is for him to consider giving up the quest that for years has been his sole reason for existing.  

kakashi reaches sasuke during this conversation, the same way iruka is able to reach naruto.  but unlike iruka and naruto’s connection, sasuke’s situation ends up being a perfect storm of bad circumstances - kakashi is ordered out of the village just when orochimaru’s minions are about to make their move, and the connection he makes with sasuke is disrupted before it can make the kind of difference in sasuke’s life that iruka’s companionship makes in naruto’s.  and of course, we all know where things go after that.

but it still matters!  it matters that this is the last conversation they have.  the next time they meet, three years later, it’s a mirror image of this, right down to kakashi tying sasuke up with a wire.   that moment when kakashi tells him “look deep inside your heart, one more time / deep down, you know the truth” - the shot flashes to sasuke’s memory of all his old classmates, the same way sakura and naruto emerged in his mind when kakashi told him “still, we’re not all that bad off.  at least you and i have found new comrades to help fill the void.”  and then the camera zooms in for a close-up where the only thing in the frame is sasuke’s trembling lip - because he’s hurting!  even though he’s too far gone right now to come back (and he has valid reasons for this, importantly), there’s a buried part of him that still feels conflicted.  a part of him is still up in that tree, trying to decide what to do.  

the importance of sasuke finding an adult who understands what’s he dealing with and can connect to him in a way that no other grown-up has ever been able to do just CAN’T be overstated.  sasuke needs his friends - desperately, he needs them - but he’s also in desperate need of an Adult.  sasuke has been living in an absolutely fucked headspace for years and years, and he has way too much trauma/baggage to sort through on his own.  he’s sixteen years old.  he needs a grown-up to support him - and the only person he’ll ever accept in this role is somebody who understands him, someone else who lost everyone they loved, someone else who suffered at the hands of the system, someone else who hated himself and blamed himself for the deaths of the people he cared about and who somehow still made it out of the darkness without succumbing to the tempting oblivion of self-destruction.

sasuke needs to know that it’s possible to suffer the way he has suffered and still be a whole person, still live a whole life, still have loving and meaningful relationships with the people around him.  he needs to know that he can do more than just survive - that maybe he’ll have to overhaul everything he thought he knew about what it means to be “strong” or “safe” in this world, but that if he can manage to do that, then there is a way for him to be rescued from his pain, one that doesn’t involve hurting other people (or himself).  he needs to know that his life can be more than just the terrible things that happened to him.  and the only person who can teach him all of that is someone who’s already figured it out for himself.  

[royallyprincesslilly]

Title: Scantily Clad {One Shot}**

Henry Cavill x Reader

Warning: Cursing, Dominant Behavior, SMUUUUUT, NSFW, Mildly Rough Sex

Words: 4.5k

Summary: Reader is going to an event with Henry, and this is what she decides to wear. Henry isn't happy about it at all. He puts his foot down, but the reader is stubborn and plays the feminist card and still chooses to wear it.

Note: A little HC action for you guys, it has been a while and I miss him. As always, thank you guys for reading, I appreciate you guy so much!!!

If you enjoyed this please, LIKE, COMMENT, REBLOG.  ❤️❤️❤️

***Loosely Edited/Proofread***

***Interactive***

“Y/N, are you ready yet? We’re going to be late, darling,” Henry shouted from downstairs in the foyer of his London flat.

 “Ten minutes, babe, I promise.”

 He sighed and checked his watch for the eighth time in the last twenty minutes. You’d told him ten minutes twenty minutes ago. He should have been used to this. You’d been together for almost two years and engaged for four months, and in all that time, this was not the first time you’d taken forever and a day to get ready. He sat in the lounge chair in the foyer and pulled out to phone to answer some emails. He knew that he wouldn’t be getting to any work for the rest of the night, thanks to the event he was going to. That was if you ever came downstairs.

 He’d left you in the bedroom forty minutes ago doing your make up and hair. He always loved watching you get ready. It was like a show of you getting done up before the show of him undoing you. He always watched and planned how he’d do it, where he’d start, and by the time he’d formulated a plan, he was always aroused. He also knew that you knew when he was watching. You’d make it a point to make eye contact with him at several points in your process. When you painted your lips with your chosen lip color, you’d lock eyes with him. When you sucked your cheeks in to apply whatever product it was to your cheeks, you stared into his eyes. You knew just what you were doing.

 Tonight wasn’t any different. He watched you put one side of your hair up to showcase that gorgeous décolletage and had to restrain himself from going to you to pepper kisses along your skin. The look in your eyes said you wanted him to do it too. When he couldn’t handle watching the golden glow of your skin any longer, he retreated to his office to do a little work. Glancing at his watch again, he groaned, but it was then he heard the upstairs bedroom door close.

“I’m coming, I’m coming, I’m coming,” you shouted from upstairs.

 He stood, buttoned his tux jacket, and adjusted his cuffs in prep to leave. The clink of your heels coming down the marbled stairs had him looking up with a smile to watch. What he saw not only took his breath away, shocked him, and annoyed him, but it also confused him. You descended the stairs in a metallic gunmetal grey type gown that incredibly left little to the imagination. As you came down the remaining steps, his eyes darted to every place your skin peeked through.

 “I’m here, see I told you ten minutes.” You stopped in front of him, showing him up close just what you’d decided to wear tonight. He heard your voice, but it was mumbled. None of your words were making it to his consciousness. He was too lost in your dress.

 “Henry!”

Snapping his head up to your face, he wanted to say something about how beautiful you looked, but something else came out.

 “What’s wrong, baby?” Your voice was full of concern as you reached for him, but he stepped back.

 “What are you wearing?”

 You reared your head back and gave him a confused look.

 “What? It’s a dress. It goes perfectly with your bow tie. Come on, we’re going to be late,” you answered before you walked to the mirror in the foyer, giving him the view of the equally revealing back.

 “Where the bloody hell do you think you’re going dressed like that?”

 That was when you spun around with the look he knew well that said he was acting like a wanker.

 “Excuse me?”

 “I can see—everything, Y/N.”

 “You’re exaggerating it’s not that bad,” you defended.

 “Not that bad?” He approached you and touched the slab of fabric that hugged your breast. “This looks like if you bent down and stood, your breast will be out. Not to mention, it gives the perfect imprint of your breasts, giving the world an adequate size measurement.”

 “You’re kidding right, Henry?”

 “No. Then look at this split. Why is it so high? Your entire thigh and hip are showing. Are you wearing knickers?”

 “Wow, of course, I’m wearing underwear. Who do you think I am?”

 “I thought I knew, but look at how you’re dressed. You have to go change,” he finished in the voice that said his decision was final.

 You snorted then laughed loudly. This was not the time to provoke him, he thought.

 “I don’t know who you think you are or even who you think I am that I’d let any man dictate what I wear, especially when it is appropriate enough,” you contested as you brushed past him walking to the front door.

 “Y/N!” It was his dominating tone. You stopped in your tracks straightened your back and turned to him.

 “You may dominate me in that bedroom upstairs, but that is the only thing you dominate me in. Just because you fuck me until I’m weak does not mean that you control me, Henry. Never make that mistake, and if it’s a meek little mouse you want, then maybe you should rethink this ring on my finger. I’ll be in the car when you’re done throwing a tantrum like a little boy.”

 With that, you walked out the door, leaving it open. He stood there trying to get a grasp on his anger not only from your outfit but for what you’d just said. This was going to be a long night, he thought as he followed you out the door.

 The drive was a quiet one, you kept your face turned to your side, gazing out at London as it passed, and you kept your legs crossed with your exposed thigh over the other. He knew it was you playing it up, rubbing your defiance in his face. He fell in love with you because of your independence, your determination to be your own woman, and make your own decision and not let any man control your life or destiny. It was a big turn on. Yes, you’d butt heads a few times in your relationship because of his and your equal stubbornness, but it was nothing that you couldn’t overcome and come back from stronger than ever.

 Fifteen minutes into the ride, his anger dissipated and left way for him to feel the regret for his words, and it also allowed your words to affect him fully. They hurt. You knew what buttons to push, and he hated it. Every time he thought to open his mouth to say something, he swallowed the words. He knew the only thing to say was that he was sorry, but he was not ready to apologize. Part of him wasn’t sorry. The dress was revealing. He knew every man there would be gawking at you and imagining you naked or worse. He also knew if he saw the looks he’d flip out. Still, he knew he couldn’t leave things this bad. When the car stopped, and the driver got out, he took his leap.

 “Y/N,” he softly began.

 “Stop. If the words out your mouth aren’t, I’m sorry, then save it, and we both know you’re not sorry.” You looked at him, and he knew you wanted him to correct you and apologize. It was then he decided to concede. Sighing, he pinched the bridge of his nose before he spoke.

 “I’m sorry.”

 You look confused and surprised, but you didn’t speak. You looked as if you were waiting for something. He should have left it there.

 “But--,” you scoffed and shook your head.

 “Apologies don’t have but, Henry,” you said as you knocked on the glass. His door opened immediately, but he didn’t move, he just stared at you.

 “Y/N,” he softly pleaded.

 “Don’t worry baby once we step out of this car we will be the perfect couple,” you said with a smile painted on your face.

That was what he was afraid of, the façade. He sighed and got out of the car, and painted his own fake smile on. It was time to play a role. As he walked around the car, he waved and smiled until he opened your door and helped you out. When you stood beside him, you smiled and waved also. The two of you walked the carpet together, waving, smiling, stopping for brief interviews all the while never giving a thing away. When you were asked about your dress and complimented by countless photographers and comrades, you politely thanked them and showed it off turning at every angle. He knew it was a huge bugger off to him.

 When you walked inside the event space, you leaned to his ear. “See, it was a hit.” Your eyes were cold. This was revenge now, he thought.

  -Y/N-

 As the night went on, what was supposed to be a gala slash networking event for the who was who in Entertainment to rub elbows, chat, brag, and get together for recognition, you decided to use to teach your fiancé a lesson. You could not believe Henry’s audacity to assume he could dictate how you dressed. You knew he was possessive and could be downright controlling sometimes, but you’d never experienced it to this extent. The dress you were wearing wasn’t even that bad. You’d seen far worse.

 As Henry mingled around the room and turned on his British charm with everyone he came across, you did the same. You knew some of the people in his circle, particularly the wives of some of his friends, and that was what you found yourself in, a circle of wives.

 “I love your dress,” Elizabeth, Armie’s wife, complimented.

 “Thank you. I love yours.”

 “You have a body to die for, I’m so jealous,” Sophie, Benedict’s wife, added.

 You smiled your thanks, trying to stave off the wave of embarrassment that washed over you. You appreciated the compliments, but from anyone but Henry, they always made you self-conscious.

 “Y/N, right?”

Looking to your left, you saw someone you knew well. “Theo?”

 His smile was wide before he pulled you in for a hug. “What’re you doing here?”

 “Work, but nevermind that. You look incredible.”

 Theo looked you up and down as you fanned him off. “Stop, it’s just a dress.”

 “A dress you look incredible in, we told her,” Elizabeth pressed.

 “Theo, this is Elizabeth and Sophie.”

 He shook their hands and exchanged pleasantries before all four of you talked about simple things like the event, and the weather. When Sophie and Elizabeth excused themselves, it left you and Theo alone.

 “Here alone, or is Henry around here somewhere?”

 “You know he’s here,” you confirmed.

 “Eh, was that a slight bit of annoyance I detect? Come to regret your decision to move here or marry him?”

 “Theo,” you warned.

 He smiled and shrugged. You’d been friends for the last four or so years but never anything else despite what your other friends liked to tease. Neither of you had ever made a move, and it suit you fine. You enjoyed his company even though he liked to tease Henry a lot. He always said he was so stuffy and could stand to loosen up a bit. You always teased him that it was a British thing knowing full well he was also British. It wasn’t funny to him when you did it, though.

 The two of you caught up and joked before a few other actors came to join you. Before long, you were enthralled in conversation with all of them. You told stories that had each and every one of them laughing and hanging on the end of every word. Though you were fully invested in the conversation, you always knew where Henry was. When you looked at him, you always found his eyes on you. He didn’t look as if he cared about anything that was being said. He looked like he wanted to be near you, he probably did, but you wouldn’t give him the satisfaction.

 You moved around the room, mingling with Theo by your side. Every man that approached you had Henry looking at you. You could feel his eyes on you, could feel the sheer commanding power that he held. His presence was strong and always affected you.

 “Why is he over there looking at you as if he wished he could come over when he can? Did you have a fight?”

 “Doesn’t matter,” you said as you finished your glass of champagne.

 “What happened?”

 Ignoring Theo, you sat at the table. After a few moments, Theo realized you weren’t going to answer, so he sat beside you and asked again.

 “It’s not important. He just overreacted about my dress.”

 Theo once again looked you over, then took a sip from his glass. “Ah, the stick in the mud thought it was too revealing.”

 “Stick in the mud. Stop.”

 “He’s not entirely wrong.” Your head snapped to him and gave him an incredulous look.

 “Are you serious?”

 “Don’t shoot the messenger. It is revealing.”

 You looked over yourself then back to Theo. “Nothing is showing but a little leg.”

 “Yes. Think about it, Y/N. We get it. You’re an independent woman; you’re all about doing what you want and not having anyone control you. We get it. We love that about you. No one is debating your independence or amazingness. As a bloke, we don’t want our girlfriends ogled or even thought about inappropriately. Though gorgeous, this dress invites all of that. I’ve spotted at least fifteen gents outright checking you out.”

 Glancing around, you caught a few eyes that quickly looked away. So what, you thought.

 “Theo,” you began. He knew what was coming.

 “I get it. I’m just giving you the perspective of a man that’s not sleeping with you.”

 You sighed and nodded, deciding against speaking. What was the purpose? It was then Henry approached with a tight jaw clearing his throat.

 “Hey man,” Theo began before he stood, making way for Henry to take his place in the seat.

 “Good evening,” Henry muttered as he shook Theo’s outstretched hand. You almost laughed looking at Theo’s face.

 “Have a good night you two lovebirds,” Theo said before he walked away.

 Henry sat beside you and placed a fresh glass of champagne before you. As the two of you drank in silence, you began to think if Theo had a point. You knew the dress was sexy, but you didn’t think it was anything to get angry about. You also knew that in a relationship, you had to consider the other person’s feelings. On top of being angry about Henry’s reaction, you were also a little hurt. You’d expected him to say you looked beautiful, but he still had yet to even say it or anything remotely loving.

 “Y/N,” Henry began turning his face to meet your eyes that were already on him. He didn’t speak, though. Instead, his eyes looked to bore into you as they always did. Staring at him was a love-hate thing. You loved it because they were gorgeous, but you hated it because they were powerful and always left you feeling powerless.

 Before either of you could say anything, the lights dimmed, and a speaker appeared before the room. The rest of the night passed in a blur of speeches, applause, champagne, and chatter, none of which included you and Henry talking.

 When you got home, you were the one to climb the steps to the bedroom first. When you got to the third step, you felt Henry’s hand wrap around your wrist, stopping you. You didn’t turn around to face him, though. It wasn’t long until you felt his chest against your back.

 “I’m sorry,” he whispered before his forehead dropped to your exposed shoulder.

 “I was an utter asshole. I’m sorry. I wasn’t trying to control you, I promise. There is no excuse.”

 His words hung in the air. They felt good to hear. You were tired of this entire situation.

 “I’m a jealous man, and even worse possessive and dominating. I should never have said what I did. Instead, I should have told you how incredible you looked, how beautiful you are.”

 You turned to face him and searched his eyes.

 “I should have told you that every chance I got. I’m sorry,” Henry finished.

 “I’m sorry,” you began before taking a deep breath. “I shouldn’t have said what I did. I didn’t mean it.”

 Henry smiled, pressing his forehead to yours. “Of course, you did.” You rolled your eyes but couldn’t stop your laugher. He knew you too well.

 “I deserved it. It hurt, but I deserved it.”

 “You did.”

 “Do you forgive me?”

 You pretended as if you had to think about it on a serious note playing up the amount of time it was taking. Henry smiled but didn’t look bothered, he kissed your jaw and trailed kisses along it up to your ear. You ate it up. When his lips dropped to your neck, you let out a soft moan.

 “Am I forgiven, love?” A soft nibble at your neck had you grabbing at his waist that held zero percent fat. The man was built like a God.

 “I forgive you.”

 As soon as the words were out, Henry crushed his lips to yours, taking control of a soul-sucking kiss. You’d wanted this all night no matter how angry you were with him you always wanted to be near him. Henry wrapped his arm around you cupping your backside, pulling you flush against him. As his lips teasingly moved across yours, his tongue swirled around yours until he was sucking it. You couldn’t breathe, but you didn’t mind or care.

 Abruptly henry pulled his lips from yours and groaned. “I’ll lock up. You go ahead.”

 Once inside your bedroom, you walked into the closet to find something to put on once you’d finished your shower. You didn’t hear when Henry walked in, but you felt his hand at the nape of your neck.

“I have a love-hate relationship with this dress, my love. On the one hand, you look incredible in it, but on the other hand—it infuriates me.”

 You smirked, looking at him in the mirror, making sure he saw that you didn’t care.

 “What’re you going to do about it?” His smirk sly, and his eyes were dark. You knew the look well.

 In seconds Henry had ripped your dress in half starting at your sternum. You gasped loudly.

 “Henry! Do you know how much this cost?” He didn’t stop, though; he finished his handiwork with a faint smile.

 “I don’t give a shit. It should be burned instead of ripped.” The material fell from your breasts before it slid down the rest of your body, leaving you in your skimpy thong.

 “Huh, so you were wearing knickers after all,” Henry teased before he locked eyes with you and ripped those as well.

 “Henry!”

 “You love saying my name, don’t you?” He bit your neck as his hands cupped your breasts and fondled to his heart’s content.

 As he sucked and bit your neck, you could feel his thick length harden against your ass. He pushed you forcefully, so you were bent over the piece of furniture that held your undergarments. The movement sent your ass poking out for him. A lite slap across your ass had you flinging your head back to give his free hand something to hold onto. As he held your thick, coiled hair, he dropped another slap across your ass; only this one was a lot harder. Your groan was mixed with a moan that told him you liked it enough for him to do it again--so he did, three more times. By the time he’d finished, you were soaking and more than ready to receive the gift that was him.

 “Do you want it?” Your eyes met again in the mirror, and you thought to be defiant, but there was no time. You desperately wanted to feel him filling you, stretching you to capacity.

 “I can’t hear you, love.” Henry dropped his fingers to slide up along your slit. As he did, he groaned. You knew he could feel your wetness, and he was more than ready to dive in.

 “You’re only punishing yourself, darling. The sooner you say the words, the sooner you’ll get what you want—what you crave,” Henry whispered in your ear, making sure his lips grazed your ear.

“And what do I crave, Mr. Cavill?” Again, he smirked that dubious smirk of his that made your belly flip from anticipation.

 “You and I both know you want this cock filling you to the hilt. All you have to do is--,” Henry circled his finger at your opening, coating his finger with your juices before bringing his finger to his lips to suck it clean, stealing your breath in the process.

 “Mmm. Say the words, my love.” His voice was so deep, so husky you could feel everything he felt. You knew he needed you just as badly as you needed him. Still, your stubbornness persisted. You were testing him, knowing damn well the longer you defied him, the further your eyes would roll to the back of your head. He knew what you were doing, but you also knew he was holding on by a thread. It was obvious.

 “Y/N,” Henry warned through clenched teeth. Your smile was the fuel to make his fire rage. Henry’s hand tightened in your hair, bringing your head back a little more. “It’ll only be worse for you.” You could hear him undo the zipper of his pants, and your anxiousness got the better of you. You pushed back onto him brushing your bare ass against him. Henry groaned then slapped it again. A few seconds later, you felt him rub the tip of his need across your sex. Your eyes lulled closed as a shiver erupted through you.

 “Do—you—want—me?” Every pause had him dipping just a sliver of his length into your tight cavern. He knew it wouldn’t be enough. On the fourth dip, you tried to push back against him again so you could get what you wanted, but he must have been expecting it because you failed.

 “Say the words, and it’s all yours, love. I’ll give you every single inch that you can take—and not take.” As if to help you decide, he dipped a little more into you, pulling a gasp from you.

 “I want it,” you whispered.

 “One more time.” Henry came closer to your upturned face and waited for you to repeat the words. The look in his eye said he was enjoying this more than he should have been from how hard he felt against you.

 “I want it—fuck me, Henry!”

 When he smiled, you knew you were in for it. Henry snapped his hips forward seconds after the words left your lips, filling you completely. Your shout was loud as your hand pounded the furniture.

 Henry groaned loudly as he ground his hips, sending his cock to nudge against your walls and prod your cervix.

 “Bloody Hell!”

 As if poked with a stick, Henry began his thrusts, but from the beginning, nothing in the way he moved said slow, or gentle. He had a mission, and teaching you a lesson was absolutely a priority right now. Every time he slammed into you, his grip in your hair would tighten, and your sex would quiver, giving him a tighter than a glove squeeze, which had him getting even louder.

 “Uuugh! Christ, you’re so wet.” That was when he changed his angle. Instead of spearing forward, he added a curve as he leaned back just a little.

 “Shiiiit!” He knew that was the spot for you, and he looked like he had every intention of making sure your voice was gone the next day.

 “How does it feel, love?”

 “So fucking good. Yes, yes, right there!” Again, your hand pounded into the wood. You ignored the pain in your hand; the pleasure easily overpowered it.

 You didn’t know how much longer you could hold on if he kept giving you strokes like this, you thought. As you did, Henry sped his strokes, and every time he connected your bodies, he rotated his hips. Before you knew it, your eyes were in the back of your head, your hand grabbing the edge of the wood as you screamed and claimed your release. Henry’s grunts got louder and louder; he was close. The knowledge of that had you throwing your ass back to meet him thrust for thrust while bringing yourself to yet another orgasm.

 After a few minutes, you felt the force of his release as he tried to bury himself even deeper inside of you.

 “Fuuuuck!” The sound of Henry’s near animalistic grunt had you ready for round two already.

 “Oh baby,” Henry panted as he dropped across your sweat slickened back.

 “Mmm, you’re going to be the death of me,” Henry added as he tried to catch his breath, breath that you still had yet to catch.

 “Me?”

 You could feel the rumble of his laughter across your back before he kissed a path along your spine. When he got to your ear, he kisses it. “I put that ring on your finger for a reason. You’re my world, and the love I have for you has never been written, it is that of a man’s for his queen. You have my heart. You have my soul—I love you, Y/N,” he whispered.

 Your heart swelled, making you look back at him to see a stray tear welling in his eye.

 “Aw, baby. I love you; you’re my life, my king, my everything,” you said as you turned to him to clasp his chin in your hands. Once the words were out, you kissed him tenderly so he could feel your love. He could be a dominating wolf one minute, but you knew deep down he was a big softy.

 His massive arms held you to him in a tight loving embrace that erased all memory of any slights or anger.

 “I’ll give you till the count of ten to get your gorgeous ass in that shower, my queen,” Henry said.

 You knew not to test him again, but still, you did. “Only ten? I guess I better hurry.” You pulled from him and slowly walked out of the walk-in closet. You could hear Henry chuckling behind you.

 “The wolf is ravenous Y/N. I think it not wise to tempt him further,” Henry warned, creeping up behind you to nip your shoulder.

 Screaming and squealing, you ran from him because every wolf loved the chase.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[myaekingheart]

126. Hopelessly  Devoted

read the scarecrow and the bell on ao3 index | from the beginning | < previous | next >

               “That’s it, I’m never drinking ever again” Sekkachi announced, slumping into a booth at the dango shop. Rei paused mid-chew, blinked, swallowed. Sekkachi tightened her ponytail in frustration and flagged down Amai, the waitress. “Two taiyaki, please.”

               “Wow, what the fuck did you even do?” Rei asked once Amai skipped away. “It must be really bad if you’re ordering taiyaki.” And saying please, Rei mentally added. It was no secret that Sekkachi had a very limited diet of anything bland and rice based. True, she often treated Hiretsuna to taiyaki after routine doctor’s appointments but she never ordered any for herself.

               Sekkachi reached across the table and took a long swig of Rei’s drink. “I made a big fucking mistake, Rei. I’m losing my mind here” she replied. It was the most jittery and unhinged Rei had ever seen her, and it almost even made her anxious herself. “I just have one question for you: when we were at the bar, do you remember me, I don’t know, flirting with anyone?”

               Rei scoffed and shook her head. “I barely remember what I did that night, let alone you” she replied. Sekkachi’s thirtieth birthday had only been five days ago and Rei still found herself suffering from the aftermath of it. Her voice was scratchy and sore for days afterward, a consequence of having not formally practiced her last-minute metal screaming, and sometimes she swore she could still feel the sharp sting of alcohol at the back of her throat. All in all, her extended hangover did not bode well for her work performance. She didn’t even want to think about how terribly her last few ANBU missions had gone. She didn’t particularly want to think about the ANBU at all, though, to be honest.  

               Snapping Rei from her daze, Sekkachi shook her head and looked out at the street. “Maybe I should just go rogue. Disappear completely” she mused. “I don’t think I can ever show my face in Konoha ever again.”

               “Oh, come on” Rei whined. “Whatever it is, I’m sure it’s not that bad. Can’t be any worse than anything you’ve already done.” A few choice blunders came to mind: one night stands with unsuspecting girls she broke the hearts of, that one time she got high and jumped in a fountain at the park, then subsequently ran from the Uchiha police force. They had to put her under a genjutsu just to get the cuffs on her and even then, she resisted. There were also the many times she’d put salt on Rei’s cookies at lunch in the academy. Sekkachi was nothing short of an anarchist so her getting into trouble wasn’t even surprising.

               Unamused, Sekkachi glared at Rei across the table and replied, “No, believe me, it’s way fucking worse.” Motioning with her hand, Rei made an impatient expression and silently urged her to explain. Sekkachi buried her face in her hands and groaned. “Apparently we ran into someone at the bar that my dumb ass decided to not only flirt with but exchange phone numbers with, and now I’ve got to clean up a mess I didn’t even want to make in the first place.”

               Rei gasped in mock shock, asking in hushed tones, “Oh god, was it…a man?”

               “No, it was not a man, you idiot!” Sekkachi shouted, reaching across the table to slap Rei on the arm. “I may be dumb but I’m not that dumb!” Rei couldn’t help but laugh, even though she knew deep down the situation wasn’t all that funny. After all, if Sekkachi was this upset, it must be really serious. Amai scurried over with the taiyaki, insisting to Sekkachi that it was on the house, then offered Rei a refill of her water, which she quietly accepted. Once the waitress had scampered off yet again, Sekkachi finally gave a solid explanation. “It was…Mikazuki. You know, that bitch in the ANBU with you.”

               “Oh?” Rei asked, cocking a brow. This was definitely an interesting turn of events. Rei was not blind. She saw the way Mikazuki looked at Sekkachi, the way her cheeks blushed whenever word broke of the blue-haired kunoichi. “So? What happened?”

               “Nothing happened!” Sekkachi replied. “I just woke up the next morning to a goddamn voicemail from her stupid little hushed voice. Rei, I’ve made a massive fucking mistake. How the hell do I get out of this?”

               “Why do you want to get out of it?” Rei asked, taking a sip of her drink. “Mikazuki is a sweetheart, I’m sure you guys would have a good time together.” Nevermind the fact that she’s taken, Rei thought to herself, but she didn’t dare bring that up. She didn’t even know how serious her and Tenzo’s relationship was to begin with. What she said about crashing on his couch, the night Tenzo got wildly drunk, still stuck in the back of Rei’s mind.

               Sekkachi rolled her eyes, ripping the head off of her taiyaki and taking a frustrated, barbaric bite. “Because I want nothing to do with her!” she countered. “If I could go the entire rest of my life without having to see Mikazuki Zazen ever again, I would be incredibly grateful.”

               “She’s really not that bad” Rei protested, but Sekkachi was already on a rampage. There was no changing her mind.

               “She’s bland and she has no fucking backbone. She’s into all that weird tarot stuff which you know I don’t give a rat’s ass about it—it’s all just a bunch of fucking bullshit. Doesn’t mean anything, like how the fuck can you actually sit there and let a bunch of dumb little cards dictate your life? Her haircut is stupid and that third eye freaks me the fuck out and I can never understand a damn thing she’s saying because she’s always whispering and stammering like she can’t even make a proper fucking sentence. It’s absolutely ridiculous, I can’t stand her!”

               Rei blinked, having not expected quite so passionate an explanation. What exactly did Sekkachi have against Mikazuki in the first place? What did Mikazuki ever do to her? Rei understood that her comrade had her faults but she found it hard to believe that there was any reason to truly hate her as much as Sekkachi seemed to. Rei took an uncomfortable sip of her drink, her eyes scanning the dango shop, when she locked eyes with an all-too-familiar face standing at the counter. Oh no.

               “Mikazuki’s really not that bad, you know” Rei stammered out, trying to save face. Mikazuki herself was staring right at them and based on the look on her face, she had heard everything. Her peridot eyes went glassy with impending tears, her lips pursed as she tried to restrain herself but her red cheeks gave her away. Sekkachi either didn’t seem to notice or didn’t seem to care. She couldn’t afford to.

               Amai skirted around the corner, producing a box of petit fours from under the counter. Mikazuki barely looked at her as she took the box, slapped some money on the counter, and ran out of the dango shop. Rei considered running after her to make sure she was okay, but she had no idea what to even say to her. If anything, she was sure she would only make things ten times worse. Either way, she would have to deal with it anyway when she went into work the next morning. She didn’t think she had the strength. Defeated, Rei merely sank down into her seat and pressed the heels of her hands into her eye sockets. “You know, Sekkachi, maybe in this new decade of your life you can practice watching what you say.”

               Mikazuki raced down the street, hugging the box to her chest. At this point, she didn’t even care if she crushed the damn things. It wasn’t worth it anymore. When she felt she couldn’t maintain composure any longer, she ducked into an alleyway and broke down in tears. She should’ve known it was all a lie. She should’ve known Sekkachi would never be soberly interested in her. After all, what was there to like? Sekkachi was right about everything. She was meek and strange and bothersome. She wiped her eyes with the back of her hand and shook her head, trying to remain positive. At least she had Tenzo. He cared about her. He appreciated her company. Perhaps that was something she had been taking for granted all this time. Perhaps she had been so preoccupied with what her heart was yearning for that she wasn’t giving her full attention to what her heart already had. Mikazuki looked down at the little cakes through the plastic window of the box, decorated with swirling yellow and pink icing. From now on, things would be different. From now on, she was no longer going to hope and wish for things she knew were not meant for her. She had Tenzo, and she loved him. She was sure she did. He deserved more than what she had been providing but no longer. From this point forward, she would devote herself to him completely. She would love him the way he deserved and they would be happy. She would make sure of it.

[laurazepamwrites]

The Chemicals between us ~Ch.8

 The Orca landed with a bump on the outskirts of a dense forest not far from Bryansk. The landing jerked Junkrat awake and his nose wrinkled from the strong smell of coffee brewing.

 ‘Fuck is that?’ He asked groggily, using Roadhogs frame as leverage to sit up straighter, his long limbs cracked as he stretched.

 ‘That's the smell of four o’clock in the morning princess.’ McCree replied. ‘Want some? Might not get another chance for a while.’

 ‘Ta.’ Junkrat stood up and gave Roadhog a slight kick awake and got a curse for doing so. McCree handed him a mug as Morrison came down from the cockpit. ‘I want everyone prepared to move out soon, make sure you all have your communicators on and make sure they work. If they don't and you get caught out you’ll be on your own. Everyone move your own weapons from the cargo hold, once done we head to the compound. Genji and Zarya will meet us outside the perimeter.’

 Ana placed her empty teacup down. ‘I will scout ahead and keep watch for signs of danger. Plans can go wrong and I want to see trouble before it happens.’

 Morrison nodded in agreement. ‘Go ahead, be careful and contact when you reach the meeting point.’ Ana gave him a quick salute and headed down to the cargo hold.

 ‘Is Athena good to go?’ Morrison asked Winston.

 The large Gorilla looked up from his computer and adjusted his glasses. ‘As well as can be but we won't know for certain until we hit Talons cyber defences.’ Morrison grunted and looked towards the Junkers. ‘Are you ready for this?’

 Junkrat giggled ‘Fucking born ready mate.’ as Roadhog gave a slight nod of his head. Morrison frowned ‘Final warning Fawkes..if you do anything to jeopardize-’

 ‘Yeah I know, I’m dead and there's plenty here to do the deed. Just fucking chill alrite mate? Me n Hog will play our part no worries.’ Morrison narrowed his eyes and studied the junkers before placing the mask of Soldier 76 upon his face, the red visor shone a sinister red. From one of the windows he glanced Ana heading into the forest. ‘Everyone get ready’ He said ‘We move out in 10 minutes.’

  The walk through the forest was slow going and none too easy with the dim light and dense trees making it difficult for Hana to maneuver her Mech, often resorting to taking a longer path to find a clearing big enough. The suggestion of demolishing a path or shooting through the trees was quickly shut down. Junkrat tread carefully over thick roots protruding from the ground and lightly jumped in the tracks made by the large Mech as Hana was once again forced to find an alternate route, he took a deep breath in and revelled in the new smells and freshness of the air. Fuck it felt good to be in the open. Hana grinned at him from her Mech.

 ‘Hey having fun?’

 ‘Too right! Forgot what trees look like.’

 Hana rolled her eyes and laughed ‘You can see trees from the cliff at base.’

 ‘Yeah but not these..’ Junkrat gestured vaguely ‘Spiky ones? Got a funny smell.’

 ‘Pines.’

 They continued walking and trudging through the forest, Junkrat glancing so often towards the group and particularly Roadhog just to make sure he was still there. He got a pang of anxiety when a dense group of trees blocked his view and he lost sight of him. What in that time Morrison shot him? Or Talon where secretly following them? The sudden thought made him glance behind him and scan his surroundings..really should of left some traps. He breathed a sigh of relief when the trees cleared slightly and he found Roadhog, he had barely heard Hana speaking to him.

 ‘Huh?’

 ‘I asked if you are okay?’

 ‘Err..yeah. Yeah im great! Why wouldn't I be! Not long till I get to blow shit up!’ He gave her grin to reassure her and himself. Hana gave him a sceptical look, yet to her credit and his relief she let it slide and returned the smile. ‘Thanks for keeping me company.’

 ‘No worries, gives me more time to be out here before we go back to the lock up!’

 ‘Theres gotta be something you like there.’

 ‘Oh sure, regular grub, running water annnd now I get me own workshop!’

 ‘ Ahem!’  

 ‘ Yeah sure you and Lu are alright I guess.’

 Hana giggled and stuck her tongue out at him. ‘You're a jerk but youre alright, hey look! There's a clearing, lets catch up!’

 Roadhog watched as Junkrat and Dva approached them, not speaking until Junkrat was once at his side. ‘All good?’

 ‘Yep, all good.’

 ‘Not gonna do anything stupid I hope.’

 ‘If I do its by accident.’

 Roadhog grunted ‘Don't be impulsive.’

 Junkrat laughed ‘When have you known me to have any control over that.’

 ‘Mean it Rat..be smart about this.’

 Junkrat scoffed at him and rolled his eyes as Morrison signalled that they were close to the first point. Sure enough in the distance stood Ana, Zayra and Genji waiting on them.

 ‘Are we clear?’ Morrison asked on approach.

 ‘As Well as can be, time is now against us though. The first patrol is in less than thirty minutes.’ Said Genji, glancing towards the large Mech.

 ‘Hey its not my fault the stupid trees were so close together!’ snapped Hana, rather defensively.

 ‘Still think its bad idea to have those two here.’ Grunted Zarya nodding towards the Junkers.

 Junkrat scoffed ‘Really? Pick your fucking time to have a moan ya fucking pink Juggernaut!’

 Zarya laughed ‘Oh ho! Those brave words from someone I can snap in two with my little finger.’

 Roadhog stepped forward ‘Try it.’

   Morrison jumped in as Zarya stepped forward to the challenge. ‘Back down!’ Morrison barked at Roadhog and turned to face Zarya, ‘This is neither the time or place. That goes for everyone. I will not have childish bickering when we need to depend on each other in the field. Am I clear?’

 Zarya's lip curled in contempt but she nodded in agreement then Morrison looked to the Junkers. ‘Oi I didnt fucking start it!’ Junkrat protested looking offended. Roadhog gave him a shove and muttered something, ‘Fine fucking crystal alright!?’

 Convinced the matter was at rest for now Morrison continued. ‘Team A get ready, once our target hits our marker we strike. Winston, Torbjorn, prepare your equipment, once that patrol is eliminated we advance on the gate then it's down to you to get us in. Everyone else know their positions and objectives?’ There was a collective murmur of confirmation ‘Good, then let's begin.’

 -------------------------------------------------------------------------

 Dimitri Ivanov took the last drag of his cigarette and tossed it, the smoke drifting lazily into the early morning air. He heard the command to move and he snorted and spat on the ground. He fucking hated mornings. He was a military man during the Omnic crisis and fought in many battles, a well seasoned soldier with a large count of dead omnics to his name just like his comrades. Dead and alive. He had new comrades now, him and four other surviving men and women from his old unit. After the war their government had hardly given them anything to live off, their homes had been destroyed and like thousands upon thousands of others they had nowhere to go, no living to make. Until one day he was approached by a man, a man with an opportunity which promised work and security. An opportunity that promised a better world for everyone. A world built for the strong by the strong and he was proud to serve, proud to serve Talon.

 The patrols around the compound was easy work if but boring. He had been stationed here for a month now and the most exciting thing to happen was a stray dog getting too close to the fence. At Least it confirmed the turrets worked. The only people they saw where the trucks entering and leaving and the drop ship that came last week. He trudged along with his patrol and slung his gun back over his shoulder, reached into his pocket pulling out a cigarette and lighting it, his nearest comrade nudging him as he did so. Dimitri shrugged his arm away and took a large inhale of smoke.

 ‘What problem?’ He said, smoke exhaling through his nose. ‘Nothing out here but us and birds. Relax Anatoly my friend..nothing to shoot at us out here-’

 He turned in confusion as his comrade suddenly disappeared from his side and slumped to the ground. The rest of the patrol stopped and came to his aid. ‘He sick?’ One asked. They took his dark balaclava off his face, only then realising that his throat had been sliced open.

 The patrol leader shouted orders as Dimitri struggled to reach for the gun across his back and frantically scanned the dense forest, he felt a rush of wind behind him and heard the thud of another body falling, someone fired wildly at nothing. He barely lifted his gun as he felt a hard slap to his chest, followed by another, the cigarete dropped from his mouth, smoke and blood trailing past his lips. He fell hard to the ground and the last thing he heard was the sound of bullets hitting their targets. The patrol was dead before they even realised what was happening.

 Morrison surveyed the surrounding area waiting for a sign of the compound being alerted to the attack, a moment passed with only the sound of birds in the trees, convinced the first wave was successful he signalled for Team B to advance to their position. Winston and Torbjorn led the way and found a vantage point just below the crest of a hill overlooking the compound giving them high ground and cover. They both quickly got to work setting up a field computer as Ana scoped out the area with her Rifle. ‘Four turret droids on the gate’ She relayed back to Winston. He nodded and quickly typed on a small keyboard, lines of code flashed across the monitor in front of him as Torbjorn adjusted a signal booster. ‘If Athena can’t get in I modded this enough to send a pulse through every droid in this place..will only last a minute or so but may give us a much needed window.’ He said as he worked.

 ‘We might not need to use it..      hmm    that's odd.’ Said Winston, his brow frowning at the screen.

 ‘Is there a problem?’ Asked Jack, coming to inspect the monitor.

 ‘I'm not sure Commander, I’m in their system but..’

 ‘What is it?’

 ‘It was too easy, almost like I was let in. I’m familiar with Talons cyber security but this is..well a child could have accessed it.’ Winston gave a slight cough ‘A..er..very smart one atleast.’

 Torbjorn laughed ‘Well surely that's half our job done?’

 ‘Maybe what they have inside is not worth the protection?’ Offered McCree.

 ‘It’s enough to have guards, turrets and officials. It's important.’ Stated Ana ‘But Winston is right Jack, this could be a trap.’

 ‘If it was a trap the perimeter guard would have been prepared for us. Talon are arrogant, they don't expect an assault. Winston, shut down those turrets.’

 Winston looked toward Ana who gave a slight nod despite the frown on her face, sighing he continued typing on the keyboard as Ana looked through her scope. ‘And..that should do it’ He said looking up.

 Everyone waited and looked to Ana as she surveyed the gate, she smirked slightly as sure enough one turret slowly stopped moving, followed by another and another until each one had stopped.

 ‘Have they noticed?’ Asked Genji.

 Ana looked back and smiled, ‘None the wiser.’

 ‘Accessing perimeter turrets now.’ Said Winston, tapping further instructions to Athena ‘And..we are in! Perimeter and gate security disabled Commander, Captain.’

 Jack cocked his weapon and turnt to his team ‘Everyone in position and remember your roles! Advance!’

[ghostmartyr]

(1/2)Erm, I saw your thoughts on the most recent EMA discussion, and while I agree that he cares for them and is agressively pushing them away and breaking the EMA BOND, I believe that some of the stuff he brought up were relevant. It's weird that Armin suddenly began visiting Annie that he wasn't particularly close to after receiving Berth's memories, and while pushing for negociations is something I can see Armin doing, he's been unusually passive on some stuff, and the way he snapped at eren

           (2/2)reminded me of the exact way Bert snapped at Armin in the end of S2. A Titan Shifter’s memories influence is no joke, as seen with the SnK and the founder, and I’ve seen too many blogs dismissing that at “Eren is being bitchy” and leaving it at that. Also, while I don’t believe everything Eren said about the Ackerman. Also, Levi entertains the thoughts of Eren being eaten, get a headache, and the headache stop when he dismiss the thought and swith the focus on Zeke being eaten instead.             

I agree a little bit on the Ackerman points. No matter where the story goes, I think it would be a waste not to explore Eren wondering if what Zeke’s told him is the truth. Depending on where his head’s at, being presented with the idea that a member of his family is never given a choice in how she feels about him is a pretty destructive bomb.

Whatever else is going on, Eren angsting over Mikasa and the impact he’s had on her life? Come on. This arc’s gone full fanfic already. Go for it.

I’m guilty of missing the possibility that Levi’s headache at the situation was due to thinking about killing Eren instead of just finding the situation headache-inducing. That’s one of the hills I won’t exactly die on, but I have a very strong preference for the Ackerpains being based in trauma. Because I’m an optimistic, hopeful person who believes in fluff and rainbows.

…If that turns out to be wrong, well. Sorry about your life, Mikasa.

The Titan Shifter memories are something I feel like we’ve really only seen at play with Eren, and at this point he has three separate Titans–the Founding Titan being explicitly pervasive about it as a plot point.

Reiner and Bertolt never bring up their predecessors, and Gabi’s understanding is fueled by her love for her cousin. Porco, with his family connection, should be the best example of the most that can be expected from standard Shifter memory transfer, and he only has bits and pieces.

Eren starts drowning in his father once he reads the journals, but my impression was that it’s a unique trip that mixes the bloodline connection with the Founding Titan. That read could easily be wrong, but that’s how I understood it.

Armin going to Annie actually makes a lot of sense to me as just a piece of Armin, and I guess I’m going to go babbling about that enough to earn a cut.

…Hi, it’s 2013 again, have some Female Titan Arc feels.

-one hour later- Good fuck why isn’t this its own post.

He and Annie are seventy chapters old by now, but she spares his life twice, both after he doesn’t say anything about her having Marco’s gear.

In that scene, he says, about the girl who keeps her distance and tries not to get attached, that she’s actually pretty nice.

Then they talk, before her brawl with Eren starts. He’s playing her, but when she asks him if she looks like a good person, the conflict is real. He knows what she is by then. He doesn’t want it to be real, but he knows. He knows she’s murdered countless of their comrades, and maybe helped take out the walls.

But he doesn’t say he believes in bad people. He says he doesn’t believe in good people. He makes it about perspective, knowing that he doesn’t have Annie’s at all, and feeling that gap, but knowing even more that bridging it can’t be important when she’s an active threat.

Bad or good in general isn’t the point.

“That would make you a bad person to me.”

Armin doesn’t say Annie’s the one who has Marco’s gear. He doesn’t want to believe it, and he wants to think that maybe, this time, his smarts let him down, because otherwise that means the girl he just realized is a nice person might be a traitor.

People die because he doesn’t speak up.

He isn’t one of them.

They both screw up.

They both are good people to each other in those moments, and it’s the last thing either of them should be doing.

Even once the shouting has started over Annie getting in the tunnel, Armin is still saying they can talk. He doesn’t have Bertolt in him then; all he has is his own heart, and he doesn’t want to fight, he wants to know why.

When Annie asks him why he doesn’t say anything about Marco’s gear, Armin has his answer, and it kills him, but he knows exactly why. Annie, in comparison, is lost. She’s killed loads of people, so she should have some room to understand what makes it different, but all she can tell him is that she wonders about it too.

Then she’s locked up in her crystal, and Armin finds his answers in Reiner and Bertolt. In Marley’s history. In the world’s history.

It isn’t a surprising thing that Armin goes to Annie.

She doesn’t want to be a titan either. She doesn’t see any way out of her role. She’s trapped, and all her only bit of freedom does is bring that trap out of her mind and turn it physical.

Annie is the link to the outside world that Armin and the rest of Paradis don’t have, unless you count Kiyomi. She’s their enemy, but not because she hates them. Not because she’s a bad person. Not because they can’t understand each other.

She can’t talk back, but I don’t think Armin identifies with any character in the series more.

She’s the odd one out of her trio. Her own mistake of having a heart makes her their prisoner. She’s smart, and sees all the angles of their fucked up, rotten world.

They’re both Titans.

In the more current world, she’s another person who saved him instead of moving her people’s plan forward.

Armin loves his friends so much he tries to die for them, and instead of paying him back by honoring that, they refuse to let him go and let humanity’s greatest commander die.

There’s something about that simple wrongness. It’s the kind of wrong that can only be born from a nice person. Someone who can’t drop what they should, because it’s too precious.

It’s not supposed to be, and Armin tries to live a life where it’s not, but his best friend… his best friend can’t even consider that sort of life.

Until he razes the internment camp.

Armin might not agree philosophically with Eren’s choice to save his life, but he loves Eren, and the part of Eren that loves him back so much it maybe breaks the world–that part might be gone now.

So he goes to talk to Annie.

Who’s frozen in a time when the Warrior sent in for blood couldn’t bring herself to kill a friend.

That’s a much nicer world.

Like, I’ll cop to the story having more to do when it comes to memories and Ackerman stuff, but Armin talking to Annie? That is the most Armin thing he could possibly be doing.

…Thanks for the asks.

Sorry for ah. derailing them a tad.

[sscolariwords]

Fire and Metal

Shepard's been spending a lot of time in Mordin's lab as of late. EDI put it to an analytical metric, informing Joker and Garrus that approximately thirty-one percent of her waking activity was spent in there. Considering she's consistently been up for thirty eight hours at a time, interspersed by periods of rest that haven't yet exceeded two hours, it's long periods of time. The doctor had joked that the Commander had obviously taken a sexual interest in him, which he unfortunately could not reciprocate given his disdain for alcohol and mood music. Grunt and Zaeed had found that hilarious, and even Jacob had cracked a rare smile.

Garrus, however, is not so amused, in no small part due to the fact that he knows that Mordin's been continuously operating on her, with Miranda's assistance. He knows this because the latter of the two scientists told him, when questioned. Though, the exact wording she'd used had been “improved upon”.

“I laid the foundational work,” she tells him tiredly in the wake of a particularly long surgical procedure, the third in a week, “But Dr. Solus seems to have grasped the idea behind the Lazarus Project in ways that most of my staff couldn't fathom. Honestly, it's a shame we couldn't have brought him on from the project's inception.”

“Shepard's alive,” the Turian growls in reply, “The project is done with.”

“On the contrary, the project was never finished. Cerberus never meant to just revivify Shepard; we meant to make her invincible. Now if there's nothing else?”

“ 'Nothing else'? There's plenty else! You and Mordin need to stop cutting her up like she's a damn science fair display!”

Despite Garrus standing a foot taller than her, fanged and scarred, Miranda is unfazed by his aggression. It only takes a gentle twitch of her fingers to send him careening out of her quarters, buoyed up by a multitude of mass effect fields. The door locks behind him, before the speakers crackle to life.

“If you have objections, Officer Vakarian,” her filtered voice informs him, “Then you are more than welcome to take them up with the Illusive Man, or better yet: Shepard herself. She's undergoing them all voluntarily.”

To be fair, basic operational implants are standard issue for most military organizations throughout the Milky Way. Garrus himself has a neural mod for AR visuals, tagging enemy combatants or directing him to the next objective. But Shepard? At this point, the Turian suspects she's more metal than meat. Bone reinforcements, a synthetic muscle weave, epidermal medi-gel dispeners, the list of augmentations goes on. She can see in the dark, glow in the dark, the scarring from the Lazarus project shining a luminous orange. On Tuchanka the irradiated atmosphere burns his tongue and throat, Grunt gagging as he sets foot on his homeworld, but Shepard doesn't even sniff, as toxicity filters lining her lungs kick into high gear.

They clash with Eclipse mercenaries on Illium, trying to rescue Miranda's sister. At one point, Mordin and Kasumi are pinned down behind cover. The plan is simple: Garrus and Zaeed will lay down covering fire and Shepard will flank the emplacement. The first part of the plan goes well, and one of the mercs drops when the Commander's shotgun puts a hole through him. The other one is from Palaven, though, and familiar with Turian bait-and-switch ops. He goes for his sidearm and fires off two rounds. The first takes down Shepard's shields, the second one hits her in the cheek and her head snaps back.

There's a long, terrible, strangely quiet moment where Garrus is trying to wrap his head around the fact that it's over, they failed, Shepard is dead again, before she pulls herself upright, eyes burning red, blood waterfalling over bared teeth from the gash in her cheek, and grabs her enemy's hand in her own. There's a sickening crack, and as much as Garrus wants to think that it's the pistol that's falling in twisted pieces to the ground, the other Turian's screams inform him otherwise. He stops when the Commander's fist impacts his helmet, crushing his visor. And his skull. Despite being covered in gore, her wound's stopped bleeding by the time the rest of the squad can meet her, cheeks flush with the effulgence of working medi-gel. A few of them, Garrus included, think they should withdraw, considering Shepard just took a bullet in the head. But Miranda pushes past, uncharacteristic worry coloring her face, and Mordin resolves to check the microfibers once they're back aboard the Normandy.

Joker thinks it's cool. Garrus just thinks of Saren, the plating on his face cracked and threaded with alien lights. Tali is concerned, and with good reason. By the time she joins the mission, glitches have begun to present themselves.

In a firefight with the Blue Suns, one of their Combat Engineers deploys an EMP. EDI falls to silence Garrus's HUD winks out of existence, the comms going with it. But Shepard locks up, drops to the ground, eyes unfocused, jaw slack, like a puppet whose strings have been cut. Garrus is the first one to reach her, alarm's sounding in his head as it becomes clear she's not breathing. A moment later his AR feed reboots, and Shepard sucks in a great lungful of air. That one she actually needs a moment to recover from. Only a moment, though, in spite of what Garrus says. She insists she's fine, and offers a hand to get him upright. They are still in combat, after all. The Turian has trouble remembering that; he's still caught on that split second between his HUD restarting and her breathing again, when her biometric feed reported that her heart had stopped.

Later, EDI connects to Sehpard's augmentations' systems to run a diagnostic, reporting the Commander is, from a strictly medical standpoint, fine. The shit-eating grin she gives her long-time Turian comrade is palpable in the air. But then EDI disconnects and Shepard goes fully blind, until they hook the pair of them back up again.

A new surgery is scheduled to correct the problem, Tali to consult on the code language that was used to write the software for Shepard's prostheses, and finally enough is enough.

Not for Garrus, mind you; he's never once been able to convince Shepard of anything, least of all that she's pushing herself too hard. But Thane has a softer touch.

“It's like when your computer has a bug!” she insists, as the Drell bars the way into Mordin's lab, “You don't toss it in the trash, you fix the problem!”

“But that's where you are failing yourself,” he replies, “You aren't fixing the problem, you're postponing it with more and more extensive augmentations. Siha, you must let yourself heal.”

“Thane. There is no time for me to lay around taking antibiotics. I need to be- EDI. EDI, SHUT UP!”

She hears EDI through the comms, even when the AI isn't broadcasting.

“Siha… Shepard,” Thane insists, “You are pushing yourself beyond what your species is capable of.”

“Isn't that the point of scientific discovery?” sniffs Miranda.

“This doesn't concern you!” snaps Garrus.

“And it does you, Vakarian? Limits are excuses that fearful people invent. Shepard is beyond that kind of thinking.”

“This isn't a fitness goal, Lawson,” cuts in Tali, “You're talking about increasingly invasive surgeries to replace failing tissue with synthetic material!”

“Tali,” groans Shepard, “you're supposed to be on my side here.”

“I'm only here to make sure none of the software has a chance of shorting out your brain. I'm not going to pretend this is a good idea.”

“Two weeks ago, I took a bullet to the head and walked away with a scrape! How is that a bad thing?”

“Because it's what the Reapers are doing, Shepard. Remember Saren?”

“I. Am not. Saren. You all need to stop comparing me to that psychopath. I'm trying to save lives!”

“There are worse fates than death, Elaine,” Thane continues, “I worry for you. You don't sleep. You barely eat. Shepard, no matter how hard you push yourself, you are only human-”

“I'M NOT ALLOWED TO BE 'ONLY HUMAN'!”

Is it the increased capacity of her lungs or just her own fervor that allows for such volume. Garrus doesn't know enough about the sciences behind her augmentations to say for certain. But Shepard's roar is enough to shake the bulkhead. Silence falls in the wake of her fury, broken only by her panting.

“Every time I try to put up my feet,” she seethes, “Or catch my breath, there's an alarm that starts blaring, somewhere. The entire galaxy is catching fire, and you all want me to pretend it isn't happening. I don't get to do that! I'm 'Commander Shepard, best hope for the galaxy, lookie here, it's my favorite store on the Citadel, aren't I great?'. I was dead! It was your turn to pick up the slack and look after space, and look how that turned out! The council buried its head in the sand, Anderson spends more time bitching about this shit than actually trying to clean it up, and half the outposts in the Terminus Systems got abducted while you were out pretending to be heroes! Hell, even Cerberus doesn't want to deal with this, otherwise they would have sent an army on this wild goose chase, instead of sinking a fleet's worth of credits into bringing me back! SHUT THE FUCK UP, LAWSON, DO NOT TRY AND ARGUE WITH ME. Every single one of you would be quaking in their boots, holed up on Omega, or Illium, or wherever you please, if I wasn't here. You all had two years to fix this dumpster fire of a galaxy, and you fucked that up. So don't pretend I'm not the only reason anything gets done around here; I am not going to stop, certainly not so all of you can feel better about yourselves.”

Shepard plants a fist in the wall at the height of this tirade, cracking the panel, her knuckles already knitting shut when she pulls away. Her eyes are collapsing stars, too bright to look directly into, and every one of her crew members averts their eyes, anger and shame and hurt so thick in the air that it carries a scent. And for a moment, Shepard softens. The glow in her eyes, her scars, fade and she watches them with remorse. But it's only a moment.

“If there's nothing else,” she growls, “Then get back to your posts. Boots on the ground in four hours.”

“Shepard, this repair is going to take at least six-” Miranda begins.

“Four. Hours.”

The door locks behind them, and Garrus's stomach sinks as imagines Mordin wheeling out a cart laden with scalpels. He looks at Thane, tries for words, but neither of them can manage anything. Instead, he suits up, and goes to wait out the remaining three and a half hours down in the shuttle. He thinks of a lot of things. His father, never once approving of his insistence that rules and regulations were the only thing standing in the way of true justice. His own band of misfits, dead on the ground of their hideout, in lawless Omega. But mostly, he thinks about Shepard. He thinks about watching her become a shooting star, in the atmosphere of a planet he can't remember the name of. He remembers watching her die, and wonders if she really came back.

Then he touches his scars, thinking about Omega again. He thinks about needing to be rescued. He thinks about bleeding out in the second story of a slumhouse, and how it was Shepard, full of fire and metal that came to his rescue. And he wonders.

Oh, how he wonders.

[thotzumaki]

Always

Pairing: SasuSaku

Word Count: 2152

Rating: PG-13 ?? I guess

Warnings: cursing and alcohol

Disclaimer: I do not own Sasuke Uchiha, Sakura Haruno, or any other characters mentioned in this fic. Also Sasuke has two arms again in this one because of reasons. And did I throw in a Harry Potter reference at the end? Maybe so.

               My life had finally found a sense of normalcy. After years of confusion, conflict, and war, there was finally peace in the Hidden Leaf. I was only twenty-one and already the best medical ninja around (after Tsunade of course) and I was happy. At least as happy as I could be.

               I spent the majority of my time at the hospital and I didn’t mind. It was therapeutic to take my mind of things and just help people, plus it kept me away from my empty apartment. Tonight was one of the nights that I gladly would have stayed at the hospital all night to avoid going home, but Tsunade insisted that I get some rest and if you’ve ever met Tsunade Senju, you know that saying “no” to her demands is not an option.

              It was only 8 pm when I donned my jacket and scarf preparing myself for the chill of the night air. I loosed my thick pink locks from the bun I had piled on top of my head and the loosed tension eased the headache I’d been putting up with for the last three hours. I grabbed my purse and decided to take it slow on my trek home. Walking felt less lonely than sitting alone at home with a cup of instant ramen and a glass of wine.

               A frigid gust of wind hit me in the face as soon as I walked out the hospital doors and a shiver went down my spine. I pulled my scarf up a bit to shield my face from the icy wind. Snow floated down magically and pulled me out of the black hole of my mind. At least for a moment. Then all I could think about was how I desperately I wanted to share this night with him.

               It had been four years since the war. Two years since Naruto and Hinata were married and now it seemed like everyone I knew was pairing off with another person I knew. Shikamaru and Temari were together, Ino and Sai were practically inseparable, and dammit, even Choji had somehow managed to get with some girl from the Cloud village.

               Then there was me. Sakura Haruno. One of the heroes of the Great Ninja War. Student of Lady Tsunade. And the girl still hopelessly in love with Sasuke Uchiha, the boy who left.

               My thoughts flashed back to the first night he left. When I begged him to let me come with him and my heart ached at the memory of him walking away. Next his descent into madness then how he showed up in the middle of the war and the reunion of our team. He and Naruto’s battle was terrifying. My two closest friends and comrades in a death match. Then his redemption. My heart warmed at the memory of it. I remember seeing him smile for the first time in years and my heart soared.

               Then his promise. The promise he made me when he left a second time. The promise of “next time” that still followed me daily. How I wished that “next time” was today.

               “Snap out of it, Sakura!” I said to myself. Moping around was not going to help anything. As much as I missed Sasuke, I knew he’d come back. He had to come back. He promised.

               My determination to cheer up spiked and I refused to wander aimlessly around the village like a pathetic lovesick fool. I was Sakura fucking Haruno. I could be and WAS happy. I put on my game face and stomped all the way home.

               The cold had made my hands go numb so I fumbled with my keys for a minute or two before I got the door unlocked. The lights were out and my home was silent. Not that I expected anything different. I dropped my outer garments and purse right by the door and flipped on the lights. I lazily dropped my shoes right out of the way of the walkway and slowly made my way to my kitchen.

               I didn’t know what to cook. I wasn’t particularly hungry, but I had gotten into the bad habit of ignoring my body’s needs and barely eating one meal a day and it was taking its toll on me. I skimmed the items on the shelves in my pantry and nothing seemed appetizing. I settled on instant ramen, cursing Naruto for rubbing off on me, and grabbed a bottle of red wine because to hell with it. If I was spending the night alone, I may as well be drunk too.

                 How long had it been since I returned home without specifically needing to due to a mission? Hell if I knew. Even then, I only stayed long enough to give a report. I wasn’t one to stick around for no reason.

I saw the lights of the Hidden Leaf coming shining a good twenty minutes before I reached the main gate and my heart was racing. “Get it together, Uchiha!” I snarled at myself, ashamed that I was feeling any kind of weakness in that moment.

               It was cold and the wind cut through my coat like a knife. All I wanted to do was to see her. That’s all I needed. To be home.  But I didn’t deserve it. Not after everything. But I couldn’t resist the magnetic pull that was drawing me in. I don’t think I could stop myself even if I wanted to.

               I picked up my pace and made it into the village in no time. I should have stopped by the Hokage’s office to speak with Kakashi but Sakura came first. She had to come first.

               I found myself nervously pacing through the dark streets of the Hidden Leaf. Even with snow falling and my hands going numb, I couldn’t shake the nerves. I desperately wanted to see her, but what if she had moved on? What if she hated me now? I had left her hanging yet again with a feeble promise of “next time.” Four years is an awfully long time to wait until next time and even Sakura had her limits.

               I wasn’t good at any of this. At emotional vulnerability or talking about how I felt. It was overwhelming. I knew that I needed to do this. It was years overdue. Mere letters and a rekindled friendship was that best I had done since I was seventeen. I had to tell her. I had to tell her that I loved her.

               I made circles around Sakura’s apartment complex for what seemed like hours. I ran my hands through my hair in frustration. “It shouldn’t be this damn hard.” I thought over and over again. It was Sakura for crying out loud. She was home. She was the one person I felt completely safe with and yet I couldn’t even bring myself to knock on her door. Finally, I took a deep breath and with ice cold determination, I made my way up to her apartment.

               The hallway was dark and I could see the light shining from under her door. She was home. I was mostly relieved and partially about to lose my shit. My breathing was shallow but fuck it. I was doing this.

               Knock. Knock. Knock.

                 I nearly spat my wine out when I heard the knock at my door. I was two glasses in and my head was warm and fuzzy. Definitely not drunk but definitely paranoid of any unexpected noise I heard.

               “Just a second!” I shouted as I set the glass on my coffee table and tightened my robe as I stood from my couch. “Somebody’s going to get the shit beat of them for interrupting my me time.” I thought as I begrudgingly went to answer the door.

               I swung the door open in annoyance and raised my voice “You better have a good explanation for thi-“  then my words were gone. Sasuke. Oh my god. Sasuke. My heart felt like it was going to burst right out of my chest.

               “Sakura.” His voice was like velvet, rich and smooth. His dark eyes met mine and for a moment he looked nervous. I blinked, half expecting him to vanish, but there he was, standing right in front of me.

               “Sasuke.” I could barely raise my voice over a whisper. Without a second thought I threw myself at him, wrapping my arms around his neck. Stumbling back a bit, he caught me in an embrace and steadied himself as his arms wrapped around my waist.

               He was taller now, a good seven or eight inches taller than me which made the hug feel a bit awkward but I didn’t care. He was here. He was here. He was here.

               We stood there in each other’s arms just soaking in the moment for a minute and then I pulled away slowly. “Can I come in?” Sasuke asked softly.

               “Of course! Come in!”

               I stepped inside, Sasuke following suit, and shut the door behind us. “Let me take your coat.” I offered, being the hospitable hostess that I am. Sasuke shrugged off his winter coat and handed it to me in silence. I quickly hung it on the coatrack next to the door, not really knowing what to do next.

               “What are you doing here?” I asked, looking up at him.

               Sasuke ran his hands through his dark hair. “I just needed to see you.” His voice was gentle and shaky, not the short straight to the point Sasuke that I was accustomed to.

               “Oh.” We were still standing in my walkway. “Do you want to sit down? I was just having a glass of wine.”

               “Sure. Yeah that’s fine.”

               Sasuke made his way to my couch while I grabbed another glass from the cabinet. This was so unexpected and I didn’t usually feel nervous around him but right now my mind was racing.

               I had always imagined our reunion to be some grand romantic experience, but here he was, at my apartment on a random December night and I’m in a bathrobe. My heart was still pounding a mile a minute when I saw Sasuke sitting on my couch nervously twiddling his thumbs.

               “You need a drink.” I chuckled as I sat down beside him and poured him a glass of wine. He accepted graciously with a faint smile. I could tell he had something on his chest that was eating at him but I couldn’t tell if it was a good or a bad thing. I was so confused.

               He took a sip of wine and a deep breath then looked into my eyes. “I’m sorry I didn’t come back sooner.” Ah. “I’m still trying to atone for everything and I don’t know how to be home anymore.” His voice quaked with emotion.

               “Sasuke Uchiha, you listen to me.” I grabbed his hand comfortingly. “You do not need to apologize for healing.” Don’t get me wrong, it had hurt like hell for the last four years without him, but he had needed to go and find himself.

               His thumb lightly traced circles on the top of my hand, his eyes never moving from mine. “I left you.”  Then he dropped his gaze. He was ashamed. It was written all over his face. I hated seeing him like this. He was the light of my life.

               My hand touched his cheek and gently brought his gaze back to mine. “But you never lost me.” I brushed his hair from his eyes affectionately. “Not once.” He sighed quietly, leaning back into the couch.

               We sat in silence for a bit. Quietly sipping wine as his thumb still caressed my hand softly. It was peaceful, just being in each other’s presence. But he was still battling something inside him and it was agonizing him.

               Finally, I turned to face him directly, taking both of his hands in mine. “Sasuke, talk to me.” My voice was firm and filled with authority. He took a sharp breath and went for it.

               “I love you!” He blurted out.

                 “I love you!” the words erupted from me. I was filled with both relief and terror. Holy shit. I said it.  There’s no going back now.

               Sakura eyes widened and her jaw dropped. Fuck. Oh god I screwed up. I said it too soon.

               “What?” Her voice was shaky and uncertain as she let go of my hands to tuck her hair behind her ears. I gulped back the fear and reiterated myself.

               “I said that I love you.”

               Sakura threw her arms around me again and nuzzled into my neck. “I’ve waited so long for you to say that.” She whispered breathlessly. “I love you too.”

               For the first time in a very long time, I felt a real smile reach my lips. “After all this time?” I asked softly.

               “Always.”

               I guess next time started today.