#complementary yearning

[cherryredstars]

hello can I request a reader being from 1610 Miles universe and she feels left behind by him since all he can do is like Gwen, so somehow she ends up in 42 Miles universe and they hit it off.

Pairings: Miles-42 x gn!reader

Warnings: Fluff, Slight Angst?, Reminder: READER AND MILES ARE MINORS!

A/N: Hello! Of course you can!

Unedited

It's the same just... different.

It seems like home, smells and feels like it. But something in your gut tells you it isn't. Your gut screams that something is wrong, that something is missing. Your mind just can't prove it. Not yet, anyways.

You're not sure how you got here, how you can be asleep in one place and wake up in another without ever moving. Maybe it's some sort of fever dream, one of those insanely vivid ones that leave you yearning when you wake up. You're sure it has to be. How else would you explain this.

Your heart beats widely for the boy in front of you, even though your mind rations that it isn't really him. This isn't your Miles (and some cruel part of your mind sneers that he wasn't yours to begin with). This is someone else, something else. But he looks and feels like Miles. He speaks and acts like him. He has the same lopsided smile, same deep eyes that draw you in, the same carefree yet playful tint to his words. The only thing that differentiates him from the real Miles is his hair.

Two thick braids run down his scalp, containing his usually natural afro. They look good on him, like they're made for him. Now that you've seen them on him, imagining his hair in any other hairstyle feels wrong. There is something so complementary about this simple style on this specific Miles, and your gut tells you it's because this Miles has something that yours lacks.

For example, that look in his eyes. It isn't very unique to this Miles, because your Miles has that same tell-tale shine in his eyes too. But it's not for you, it's for Gwen. The girl who up and left one day but left some remnants behind that Miles clings to like a lifeline. That particular glossy sheen that envelopes his pupils when he talks about her, that rise of color that highlights his cheeks when you find him drawing her silhouette over and over. But this Miles- the one standing in front of you- is looking at you with those eyes and blushed cheeks. He's looking at you the way you wished Miles would.

He's tripping over himself, sputtering on his words as he tries to pull a faux illusion of calm. One so horrible and see through that you can't help but laugh, causing his eyes to widen and his collar to feel tight around his neck. He can feel the heat of his blush forming perspiration on the nape of his neck, the pounding of his heart sounding like it's shaking the whole space. He reminds you of a puppy, instantly fascinated with the new things dangling in his line of sight.

He opens his mouth and closes it, the words forming a ball in his throat. His eyes scan you as he tries to gather the words. He feels like he's in kindergarten again, trying to collect the numerous cards of words and trying to piece them together to find something that makes sense. In the end, he fails, the meaning of what they all mean- all these nouns and verbs and adjectives- escaping him until his mind locks onto the only word he really knows.

"Pretty."

Breathless and intrigued. You smile, a warmth flooding your face and your heart singing. This may not be your Miles, but he's the Miles that wants to be. The Miles without a Gwen. The Miles who makes you feel like you're not someone's second choice. This Miles who looks at you like you're the stars in the night sky. This Miles is the one that was made for you.

You only fear that you'll wake up from this dream too soon.

[malleleothreesome]

Under the Mistletoe with Malleus

❤️ summary: Malleus' latest hyperfixation is mistletoe ༶༶༶ 💚 warnings: gender neutral reader, SFW, fluff, romance, Christmas centric but not religious ༶༶༶ ❤️ word count: 4k ༶༶༶ 💚 inspired by: this ask thank you! ♡✧*:･ﾟ

Malleus listens intently to all the tales you have to tell, all the little pieces of your world, of yourself—all the little snippets that come rushing out from the recesses of your memories, painting a picture of your humanity and the universe you'd once inhabited. All the intricacies and details of how your family would spend Christmas, the foods, the gifts, the songs—he loves hearing all about your unique traditions and experiences. Malleus is endlessly grateful for each of these recollections that you decide to entrust him with—small moments of personal history that hold so much weight in shaping who you are. Your mind runs wild as your thoughts run rampant, a blur of vivid recollections that overwhelm you. Then, he sees the tears brimming on your lash line and the tremble of your lower lip, his heart sinking instantly when the painful weight of homesickness visibly crashes down upon you. His own emotions, his yearning, his gratitude are all clogged up in his throat. When the tears finally drip past your lashes and down your cheeks, you're swaddled in strong, firm arms that cradle you. Malleus doesn't bother with words as he shushes your sobs, only offering his comfort with the secure tuck of your frame against his larger form, and the gentle tracing of his elegant, gloved fingertips along the curve of your back in soothing circles. His soft humming is melodious against the crook of your shoulder, warm and welcoming as he surrounds you completely.

Wanting to make the Christmas season extra special for you, his dearest friend, Malleus spends copious hours poring over the plethora of holiday books he could acquire from the school library—reading and studying each festive tale, tradition, and legend until the pages are wrinkled with the oils from his fingertips. Each chapter carefully absorbed and ingrained into his psyche, his eyes sparkling alight with delight and fascination, relishing in the lightness and warmth of the holidays as he familiarized himself with this magical and jovial festivity. When Christmas rolls around the corner, Malleus ensures the front entrance to Ramshackle dorm is lit up and decked to the nines in brightly glowing lights strung all over the framework—an aura of luminescence and color enveloping the dilapidated architecture with festive spirit. The rest of the exterior of the Dorm was covered with glittering golden tinsel, wreaths, garlands and pinecones—whatever he had deemed as festive in his extensive research.

Malleus was determined to honor this strange holiday—a special and important part of your childhood—but unfortunately, none of the decorations, lights, or Christmas cheer were quite as meaningful and special as what he wanted it all to symbolize. When he heard about the tradition involving a parasitic plant, he was naturally intrigued by the idea that a plant would wilt away and die if not united with a particular organism—it could only flourish and thrive when entwined with its complementary other half. In return, the mistletoe would provide both beautiful flowers and ripe fruit, enhancing the lives of the forest around them and fostering harmony within the ecosystem. However, it was the usage of that plant during a kiss that truly made him delighted by its macabre nature and its value to this sacred human festivity. It seemed befitting somehow that the now dead mistletoe, the melancholy parasite that thrives in connection with others, could bring a measure of life and happiness to all who cross its path through a kiss under its eternal, desiccated embrace. Perhaps, this tradition could serve as his best effort to explain that this gesture was intended as a token of appreciation for the kindness you have extended to him—the pleasure and privilege of having you, such a splendid and bright star, in his dark and dreary world—his reward to you for making him feel alive with such an overwhelming sense of happiness that he didn't even know the sensation could exist until you entered into his life. For Malleus, you were the one to awaken him, to pull him from a long slumber and into your embrace, allowing him the privilege of knowing warmth, love, and joy once more. A ghost of a smile appears on his lips, unbidden, as he imagines the roots of the mistletoe spreading through both your lungs, finding nourishment in each other's energy, a complete symbiosis.

Malleus desired so much that your connection would be reciprocal, as intimate and profound as the magic of this holiday would allow. Though your relationship up until this point has remained platonic, he hopes the magic of this custom might give him permission to love and cherish you as so much more. From the moment he first laid his eyes on you, his heart had already made his decision. That fiery intensity of emotion for you has only been compounded with each meeting the two of you have shared—the yearning that only grows stronger with each moment he spends at your side. His feelings for you have reached a saturation point; the deep well of passion and affection that burns ever stronger within the confines of his chest will not be extinguished unless the source of all his turmoil is revealed and answered in due kind. At long last, he wastes no time in preparing the customary kiss. His heart yearns so dearly for it that even the constant tug of his usual shyness and trepidation could never possibly bring him to halt in his advances. Malleus promised himself that the delicate, thriving thing you and he were developing would not fall prey to the same pitiful demise as the mistletoe if left untouched and unwatered. If you did indeed feel similarly about him, he could only imagine the beauty and majesty that would blossom between your intertwined souls, a union of great and unstoppable potency, a lifetime of adoration and devotion.

Therefore, he procured a large branch of mistletoe, so ripe and abundant with sprigs that its small, white berries shimmered and shone. The hanging plant seemed to call out, in a sing-song tinkle of fairy bell laughs, for his beloved to walk underneath, so he could ensnare you in its clutches and give you an obligatory kiss you couldn’t refuse—or so he hoped. Malleus wrapped the strand with some festive red ribbon, decorated with twirling glittery snowflakes, making it shimmer under the twinkling rays of Christmas light. Then, he carefully balanced the mistletoe at the highest point above the doorsill and stepped back, admiring the way the golden glow of the lights would reflect off the glossy white berries, casting them in an ethereal iridescent glow that made them pop, dancing across its branches as though possessed by some Christmas spirit. They sang for you, just waiting for you to take Malleus up on their unspoken promise of his unrequited, hidden desires for your lips.

With that, Malleus knocked on your door. Though, despite his determination and his willpower—so vast and endless that his ambition was virtually limitless—Malleus couldn't help but be flustered, his hands trembling and sweat forming along his brow, heart rate beginning to rise like a swelling wave until he could hear it beating in his pointed ears. The silence that engulfed him was deafening as his mind replayed the myriad ways you might respond to his advances—sharing his sentiments, returning his affections, giving him the opportunity to finally love and kiss you the way he so desperately, hopelessly yearned. Or—perhaps, his advances could have an unwanted negative reaction, creating friction or even destroying your friendship—if not the very love he sought—completely. Undeterred by the looming anxiety that threatens to drown him like a tempest-wrought sea, his heart manages to remain valiant and brave, the steady rhythm keeping him tethered, ensuring him the courage to risk the possibility of breaking apart and dissipating with the winter wind that sieves through his lithe fingers.

As he hears the creaking footsteps along the old staircase inside, the adrenaline kicks in, giving him the fight or flight impulse he has been lacking, his legs stiffening, threatening to buckle from his immense nerves, knees trembling so harshly that he almost loses his balance. He shuts his eyes, trying to brace himself for whatever comes next, not allowing himself to breathe again until the knob finally gives way and the door is thrown open. At last, Malleus gazes upon your dazzling appearance, flooding his vision with an image he's dreamed about for weeks: you stand before him, bathed in the bright, effervescent light, glittering hues of gold and green like a present wrapped up just for him. Before he even allows you a moment to compose yourself and register his presence, Malleus can't help himself, the need to let his words rush out overwhelming him until his syllables practically stumble over each other.

"I wish to partake in the traditional parasite with you," he tells you quickly, trying to sound confident despite the urgent desperation to speak leaking through in his strained vocal chords, struggling to hide the shakiness that attempts to invade and taint the voice he wanted to convey his longing for you with. His words are filled with hope and trepidation, his emerald eyes wide with vulnerability as the mistletoe glistens under the shimmer of lights he personally strung up, bathing the two of you and your surroundings in a magnificent luminance that casts a perfect spellbinding glow upon the scene. Your mouth falls slightly ajar as your eyelids flutter in confusion before registering his intention, noticing the way his expectant eyes dart between your lips and the hanging plant above your door frame, his intense gaze giving you the most telling implication. The sudden realization of his motive renders your whole being paralyzed. Your face heats up from the sheer impossibility of the moment and your brain fizzles into a complete and utter daze, unsure how to comprehend the enormity of the offer he's extending.

An eternity seemed to pass as the seconds ticked on, his dark brows knitting together as the mist and tension seemed to wrap around the both of you. The sting of the cold wind whistled past the space that seemed to shrink between the two of you in unbearable torment. A curtain of lacy snow was falling around, shrouding everything in a dull glow. The night itself seemed to be in a strange sort of serenity and apprehension—watching his eyes lock onto you so intently and feeling his breath, hot and heavy, mingling in the frost between the two of you. The foggy mist of the cool evening air floats through your hair, tiny particles of frozen water suspended around you and shimmering brilliantly as the beams of multicolored lights shine past and illuminate each crystalline droplet in a celestial aura.

Despite it all, your focus was on him alone.

Finally, he was able to collect the breath stolen from his lungs and continue his confession, taking your floundering silence as an invitation for his explanation. "I had wished to spend some time with you under a mistletoe, even though this is something that humans usually do with their partners or loved ones..." he admits sheepishly. You couldn't stop the gasp that escaped your lips when you saw how glassy and emotive his eyes were, the sparkling lights catching the yellow flecks in his viridescent stare.

A shadowy flush washes over his pale complexion as he allows the words he had tried so long to repress to come flowing freely from his lips. "I've noticed how sad you seemed since you were removed from your world, and I wanted to bring you a little of the Christmas cheer you're accustomed to. I wanted to ensure we'd have a pleasant Christmas, especially with how often you've shown me such loving kindness," a sigh escaped his throat, "you've gone to such great lengths, I wanted you to know just how much you mean to me..." His fingers thread together anxiously as he continues his ramblings. "I was so excited to learn the Christmas tales, legends, and histories behind all the traditions... There is so much joy and good-will involved. It seemed a befitting way to honor our time together. As my beloved friend—," his tone holds a subtle note of reluctance to his last statement as he lingers on the term a bit too long. "I wanted to ensure your time in Twisted Wonderland wasn't depressing, and that you experienced Christmas as best you could under your circumstances." The more his sentences seem to elongate, the further he's pulled into himself and begins to overthink every minuscule aspect of his interaction.

The wind picks up slightly, blowing his silky, ebony locks away from his forehead, revealing the shiny scales that cascade up the top half of his head as his horns poke out through the billowing strands. His long, heavy cloak trails behind him, sweeping up the fresh piles of glittery snowfall, shimmering under the auras of the decorative lights he painstakingly strung for you. Malleus was so imposing in the darkness of the night—there's an ineffable beauty to it as his skin seems to emit its own soft glow. Yet, despite his frightening appearance, he appears so docile and timid standing before you with his head bowed, one foot dragging the toe of his boot along the white slush and ice, kicking clumps of snowy wisps, attempting to abate his mounting anxiety.

"...Are you aware, child of man, of the nature and symbolism of the mistletoe?" He pauses and peers into your eyes, emerald pools pleading for mercy as a crack opens within him, revealing his fluttering soul for your scrutiny, allowing you to glimpse his emotional state in a rare display. "Mistletoe requires the partnership and nourishment of another to keep it flourishing—without its partner, it will wither and die a gruesome death, gasping, desperate, starving..." The strain on his tone is audible, words full of unspeakable yearning as he pines so desperately, the loneliness of centuries seeming to distill within a single, all-encompassing desire for your acceptance and love. His Adam's apple bobs with a hard gulp of apprehension as he seeks the approval he longs for deep within your gaze, hoping he has finally found the love of which he has searched for since the first heartbeat he has taken.

"No matter where it falls, or how strong its stem or seed, it will perish without another plant to sustain and nurture it," his explanation was grave and yet somehow poetic, holding you entranced with rapt attention. Each sentence was meant to mimic his struggle—the endless waiting, and the desperate need for companionship that has weighed so heavy on his aching heart for so long. The solemn confession of a hopeless romantic, yearning desperately for the chance to take root, plant his soul and spread until all the ache was gone, replaced by the warmth and fulfillment of life only a partner could give him.

"And yet, if the two plants come into symbiosis with each other, the result is breathtaking—one would not expect something so simple would possess such transcendent beauty and vibrance," his melodic tenor takes on an ethereal quality, as the wondrous facts he learned are once again brought to the surface, replacing the melancholy in the air. "Mistletoe is capable of blossoming to life; producing flowers and bearing fruits when combined with its host, providing an environment for both plants to flourish and thrive," his heart picks up its pace at the subtle meaning and implication behind his words. "Once a healthy mistletoe becomes entangled with its beloved, the pair remain connected and thrive, ultimately strengthened by the bonds forged in interdependency, blooming brightly against the frigid temperatures of winter." Malleus' soul is brimming and bubbling over with the hope and anticipation of a relationship with you and, in an instant, Malleus understands what it truly means to be alive.

"Since you first crossed my path, the mistletoe within my chest grew with such ravenous appetite, longing to reach out to your heart and find harmony, sharing in warmth and nurturing life. You, my lovely starlight, are a plant of the utmost virtue," he gently caresses your cheek as you fall deeper under his enchantment. His words have rendered you completely immobilized, the smooth silk of his voice ensnaring you, unable to escape its sweet whispers and dulcet tone. "For the first time in all of my years, the bud inside me began to bear fruit and opened my eyes to a paradise I never thought possible. Through a simple act of your kindness, you have breathed life into my tired and aching heart and granted me new purpose." Malleus cups your face so delicately, long, tapered fingers stroking the curve of your cheekbones in loving affection. He gazes at you with glowing, adoring eyes, staring deep into the infinite possibilities of your future together. The soft plumes of the falling snowflakes softly embrace you as his feather-light touch communicates all his longing and unspoken passions. You allow yourself to bask in the tender and raw vulnerability of his heart as the glimmering lights and stars in the sky shine with the promise of a brighter tomorrow for you both.

"I had spent many years in unending isolation. Each passing second in your presence was the happiest, most indescribable euphoria. It took a considerable amount of time to discover these feelings and become aware that they are associated with the yearning for intimacy, something which I was denied for a great amount of my lifespan. I've long desired the things I've learned your Christmas legends signify," the words leave him on a wistful sigh, an endless source of elation. "Of family, comfort, love... All that I desire for Christmas is you," he concludes softly. "It was thanks to my research into the mistletoe that I realized how much I needed your lips as though without them I would never draw another breath, so I ask... Do you wish to be mine? Could I have the gift of your lips, of a kiss?" he requests breathlessly as the tip of his tapered thumb ghosts across the flesh of your plush lower lip, sending shivers throughout your whole being.

At last, the confessions of his affections toward you reach their inevitable resolution, allowing the culmination and coalescence of every feeling and emotion within his soul to burst forth like fireworks, shooting off into the midnight air in an explosion of beauty and intensity that would cause any witness to pause and stare in awe of the magic of the night. Like the soft, romantic tones of Christmas music and the enchanted glimmers of holiday lights, Malleus' spell woven in the lyrics of his confession engulfs you in an aurora borealis of ardent devotion. The feeling of his hands against your cheeks radiates warmth and comfort as he cradles your visage close, tender and secure against the soft flurries that flow all around you, surrounding you with an intimate aura of holiday mirth. You find yourself leaning into his touch as your heart and soul yearn to return the depths of his affection, so openly displayed across his handsome, captivating features. With a surge of adrenaline coursing through your veins, your knees threatening to buckle from his searing yet unyielding stare, you gather the strength to utter the most wonderful syllables you have ever experienced the pleasure of pronouncing—the sum of every single one of his blessings wrapped up neatly into one succinct phrase.

"I love you, too."

Your voice was shaky, unsteady, cracking under the emotion, but the message was unmistakable. The intensity of the moment rendered Malleus stunned and speechless, tears of delight stinging his emerald eyes, brimming at the waterline with the intensity of his joy. Every single day was spent thinking of the next instance where the two of you might cross paths and now, you'd just given him the most spectacular present in the world. Malleus doesn't think about anything else, he just leans in, lips parted ever so slightly, barely containing the gasping breath that escapes his throat as his nose nudges yours and his entire world collapses upon itself before igniting with an incandescence of pure elation. With all the delicate adoration of his whole, enchanted being, he offers you a sweet brush of his soft, inviting lips against yours. A whimper emanates from his mouth as a trembling sob of disbelief is unleashed, reverberating between the two of you and sending every last vestige of his restrained sentiment into you, engulfing your heart in a fervid embrace that crushes you with all the weight of his desperation—his centuries' worth of desire and craving for an end to his misery.

Despite having never been kissed, his lips moved confident and gentle, as though it were as natural as his very breath, or the thrum of his heart. The sensations were unparalleled—better than his wildest expectations as your flesh entwined with his, mingling the pliant texture and pillowy warmth. A satisfied sigh rolls past his tongue, which teases the seam of your mouth, offering gentle, fleeting sensations as he licks and teases your bottom lip. A series of jolts rock your frame when his fangs accidentally nip at the skin. The sound that leaks from his throat as he swipes his tongue over the wound and laps up the warm, metallic liquid of your blood is guttural and broken with the raw emotion of being deprived of such ecstasy for so long. It was heavenly—to finally be united and experience the taste of love, passion, and the transcendent rapture of the one and only person to ever make him feel such happiness. 

He swallows every whimper and moan of your kiss, reveling in the sounds that permeate through your entangled forms and dance on the frosted wind. Your fingers come to thread through his silk-like locks, nails grazing his scalp until a shudder rattles his chest and his tongue can't help but invade the hot, wet cavern of your mouth. There's a subtle pressure placed on the base of your skull, adding a deeper angle, so that he may completely envelope and taste the sweetness of your saliva as you revel in each other. When the chill of the winter winds brings forth the full impact of the cold, and the mistletoe spins aimlessly under its icy breath, swaying above, you are undeterred in the bliss of your newfound love. Your noses smudge as you press yourself further, gaining deeper contact and savoring each brush of his deft, explorative tongue and the tickle of his heated breath fanning against the sensitive surface of your palette. The kiss sparks flames within you that make you forget the bitter chill, warming the deepest crevices of your core, staving off the frigidness of the night and replacing it with the cozy, fluffy heat of your love. You clutch desperately, latching onto the black tailcoat and pressing the muscles and softness of your bodies even closer, desperate for each touch, wanting him as close to your form as you can manage. The fullness of your feelings for each other, and the completeness of his confession, finally come together in a bittersweet, perfect dance of two souls. Forever bound, hearts thudding in unison as you two continue to exchange kisses underneath the mistletoe, filling this merry season with newfound glee and a holiday tradition all your own.

When you two finally make it inside, you sit comfortably with his arms wrapped around you atop a pile of plush blankets, surrounded by mounds of pillows under the twinkling lights of the massive tree he had erected and draped in garland. Next to him, there was nowhere better you'd rather be, snuggling deeper into his warmth, burying yourself in his embrace and cuddled tight under his heavy, weighted cloak as the roaring fire before you burned in a warmth that reflected that of the deep, profound affection the two of you shared for each other. As he held you in his lap, surrounded by the soft music playing in the background and the decorations he'd strung, he looks at you with excitement alight on his beautiful visage, eager to share more fun facts about his latest hyperfixation. With the shimmering lights refracting across the deep emerald pools of his gaze, he starts to ramble, "Did you know, mistletoe is also a sacred symbol of fertility—"

Woah, woah, woah, woah... I just spent all day working on this, its like, 10:30pm and now I'm just now eating mac and cheese for dinner. I really love what I created, I hope you all do too. This was fulfilling a request for my 12 Days of TWSTmas event, so uh, anon, I'm not sure if this is what you expected of me... I think I projected my own newfound mistletoe hyperfixation onto Malleus a bit too hard, but I hope this meets your expectations. I'm desperate to hear all your thoughts on this one, I really want you guys to love this as much as I do! I wish I had more to say here, but my brain is melting. My exhausted brain longs to sign this off like a corporate email. Best, Erica Malleleothreesome

[zalrb]

OK I am so interested in why TenMartha is your Bamon (passively of course!)

Oh! Mostly because with different writing I would ship them (that’s what I mean by Bamon ship, not that they’re similar, but how shippers feel about Bamon is how I feel - though not as intensely - about TenMartha). They actually have a lot of scenes I liked. The way people were talking about how terribly Ten treated her, I expected something very different from what I saw and for sure, the dialogue definitely states that Ten is effectively supposed to look through Martha, he's supposed to be yearning for Rose, grieving for Rose, which is why we get scenes like this

and of course, I get that this is supposed to be at the back of his mind/heart all the time even when it's not directly addressed, but when watching, I actually found that the Rose stuff was pretty minimal in comparison to the action indicating a fierce protection, fierce affection from Ten to Martha and all the angst that comes with that, like in Gridlock (which I actually quite liked as an episode), when she's abducted, his response

could simply be attributed to guilt that he put her in that position, I mean, he says as much

but then we get 42

which demonstrates how much she means to him. For all the dialogue around how he doesn't see her, doesn't look at her, and kind of just likes her "fine", I, personally, think we see the opposite.

Plus, like I said, I think Freema and Tennant have a charming chemistry together

they can be flirty

and I think that the show portrays why Martha would be enamoured with the Doctor the best out of all of the companion/Doctor duos I've seen so far, because Ten actively tries to impress her, he wants to earn her respect and earn her admiration

and he actively "courts" her, he's the mysterious guy who shows up outside of the bar she's at with a time travelling ship, basically being Aladdin saying, "I could show you the [universe]"

and despite what he says, he doesn't leave her alone

and they actually work really well together on their adventures, their skillset and their curiosity etc. are actually quite complementary and he's consistently taken with how good she is

so, like, I could write a whole thing about how I don't think Ten didn't let Martha in and how I don't think he didn't see her and all he saw was Rose but rather the loss of Rose made him put on a performance of flippancy but I don't think that really matters, the bottom line is that basically, they're my passive Bamon ship because if the context was different re: the Rose of it all, I would ship them.

[reunionatdawn]

The beauty of Axel's original character arc

"I thought a lot about that. Should I leave him as he was or should I bring him back again? However, when I considered the people that Lea wants to bring back, his existence plays a big role. I think Lea has successively become a key character." (Tetsuya Nomura)

Nomura said that he debated whether to bring Axel back to life, or to leave him as he was. The fact that he wasn't sure meant that his KH2 character arc must have felt complete somehow. So, I'd like to take a look back at Axel's original storyline in KH2 and why I liked it so much. I thought his death worked very well as a beautiful and satisfying (albeit more bittersweet) ending to his story. In many ways, I found it to be much more poignant than his storyline in KH3.

“Is that how to treat a best friend on coming back from completing a long mission!” “I don’t recall becoming your best friend.” (Another Report: Roxas—Somewhere in Time)

Roxas was closer to Axel than any of the other Organization members. But he obviously yearned to have best friends his own age. That is why he was best friends with Hayner in his dream world, even though he didn't know them in real life. And he didn't even remember Axel. In other words, Roxas and Axel were not really best friends. In the short story that was included with the Japanese version of KH2FM+, Axel was the one who was insistent on using that label.

Hayner: Well, I doubt we can be together forever. But isn't that what growing up's all about? What's important isn't how often we see each other, but how often we think about each other. Right?

The whole concept behind Nobodies was that they had no hearts, but they still had their memories from the time when they did. So, the writers undoubtedly had some idea of what each member's backstory was like. In the original KH2, the writers chose not to explicitly tell us anything about Axel's past. But based on his behavior, we would be able to ascertain that he probably had a best friend when he was still a human. However, he was already a grown up. His summer vacation must've ended a long time ago. He could no longer be with his best friend, and he needed Roxas to fill that void.

Roxas: Organization XIII… they're a bad group. Naminé: Bad or good, I don't know. They're a group of incomplete people who wish to be whole. To that end, they're desperately searching for something.

One of the biggest themes in KH2 is that of duality. In Hinduism, the universe is said to be made up of two complementary opposite forces called Shiva and Shakti. Shiva is the masculine force and is known as the destroyer or transformer. He is associated with chaos, darkness, and the element of fire, which symbolizes purification. Shakti represents light, order, and the feminine nurturing aspects of the universe, giving birth to new life. She is associated the element of wind, which symbolizes life energy and creation.

Axel's moniker is "おどる火の風". It translates to "Wind of the Dancing Fire" or "Dancing Fire's Wind". This is my theory of what the deeper meaning was. One of the most famous depictions of Shiva is that of him dancing in a ring of fire. This version of him is known as known as Nataraja. The rhythmic movements of the dance are said to cause storms and destruction. And there's a backstory to the dance.

In Hindu mythology, Sati immolated herself out of intense devotion to her husband Shiva when her father insulted him. When Shiva learned of Sati's death, he was overcome with grief, sorrow, and uncontrollable rage. Shiva carried Sati's lifeless body on his shoulders and began to perform the cosmic dance of destruction.

In KH1, the reports mentioned how Ansem amplified "storms" in the subjects of his experiments on the darkness of the heart. The kanji used (嵐) can refer to a literal storm or it can also be used metaphorically to describe an intense emotional state. I suspect that the original idea in KH2 was that Axel's best friend was killed during an experiment. And this event caused Axel's heart fall to darkness, turning him into a Nobody. It's probably the reason why Axel was so delighted to assassinate Vexen by setting him on fire.

Axel: Let's meet again in the next life. Roxas: Yeah. I'll be waiting. Axel: Silly. Just because you have a next life…

The imagery of Shiva dancing within a circle of flames represents the eternal cycle of birth, death, and rebirth. Shiva performs the dance and destroys the universe, but this destruction is eventually followed by rebirth. His lover Sati was reborn as the goddess Parvati and reunited with Shiva as his other half. Their combined form represents unity in duality and cosmic balance. In KH2, Axel did not think he was going to be reborn. And that was the basis of his storyline.

Naminé: We may not have homes. But there is someplace I want to go… And someone I want to see… Axel: Same here.

Nobodies had a strong thematic association with death and the afterlife. In KH2, Naminé was the ghost girl living in the haunted mansion. In KH3, she was an incorporeal star in the Final World, the metaphysical place where people go when they have strong attachments and cannot pass on to the other side.

A Nobody was the spirit that went on even as its body faded from existence. They were very similar to the Unsent from FFX, which was another game written by Kazushige Nojima. Axel was created because his human-self had strong sentiments. He desperately wanted to be with his best friend forever. And this unfulfilled dream, ironically, kept his body and soul tethered to the realm of light.

Kairi: Maybe…waiting isn't good enough. Axel: My thoughts exactly! If you have a dream, don't wait. Act. One of life's little rules. Got it memorized?

When Axel asked Kairi if she wanted to "see" Sora, he was referring to her meeting him in the afterlife because he was planning to kill them both. A similar form of wordplay was also used in the Japanese dialogue. His intentions were made apparent by his outstretched hand. He wanted Sora to become a Heartless again. So, he probably planned to accomplish that the same way he became a Heartless.

(Japanese Translation) Axel: We're quite similar, aren't we? Both of us want to meet our important friends. Don't you think we're like comrades?

In the KH universe, when a person dies, their heart returns to the light of Kingdom Hearts. Since Axel didn't think he had a heart, he thought there would be nothing left of him to live on after his empty vessel was destroyed. Even if he wanted to die and be reborn to meet his best friend, he couldn't. He was driven by intense loneliness.

Some Kingdom Hearts fans think there's something romantic between Axel and Roxas and that Disney stopped that from being made explicit. Is that true? Have there been things Disney have stopped you from doing? Nomura: In terms of the relationship between Axel and Roxas, we never intended anything like this and this is actually the first time I ever heard of it! We don't want to openly negate how the fans have come to enjoy the characters, but it was not something the creative team intended. Axel and Roxas are the best of friends and that's their primary relationship. 

Axel's intense yearning to see Roxas once more made fans question his orientation even back in 2005. Akuroku was quite a popular ship back in the day and many players saw romantic subtext on Axel's part. I do agree that Axel is easily read as queer. But the creative team was not trying to imply that he was in love with Roxas. I think it was his human best friend that he was really in love with, and Roxas just reminded Axel of him. When he was with Roxas, he felt like he was with his best friend. And that's why he wanted to die by his side.

(Japanese Translation) Axel: When I was with him, it felt like I had a heart too. That kind of feeling... I feel it with you too... The same...

When Axel said, "the same", he was referring to how Sora reminded him of Roxas. But I believe that we were invited to read between the lines and wonder if he was also referring to a human best friend that had already passed on. Ultimately, Axel's original KH2 arc was not about being together with Roxas forever. Roxas merged with his other half and became whole. He would live on within Sora.

In some Hindu traditions, "Sati" also refers to the act of a widow willingly participating in a self-immolation ritual on her deceased husband's funeral pyre. It was seen as an expression of devotion and loyalty and also an act of peerless piety which was said to purge her of all her sins. The widow would achieve spiritual liberation (moksha) not only for herself but also for her deceased husband. This meant that both would be freed from the cycle of death and rebirth (samsara). The widow was thought to be reunited with her husband in the afterlife, enjoying an eternal spiritual existence with him.

To help Sora reunite with Kairi, Axel self-immolated. After he died, Nojima probably envisioned that he would meet his dead best friend again, who was waiting for him on the other side. He had attained moksha, which represents the final goal of human existence in Hinduism, where the soul is liberated from the cycle of samsara. And that's probably why Nomura wasn't sure whether it was better to bring him back to life or to just leave him as he was.

"I never thought he would grow as much as he has. We originally planned to have him exit upon being defeated by Roxas during the opening of KHII, but all the staff, myself included, were strongly inclined to have him keep playing an active role after that. It's possible he will have things to do in the future, too. I tried to put that into his 'see you' line in KH2 FM+." (Tetsuya Nomura)

When KH2 was written, the writers probably had not envisioned a preexisting relationship between Saïx and Axel. But after its success, they decided to expand on the Organization's backstories, and came up with that idea. Isa was based on the original concept that was implied in KH2. Axel did have a human best friend, and that loss had a profound influence on his relationship with Roxas.

If Axel's human best friend was supposed to be literally dead in KH2, then him only being Norted is a major retcon, yes. But it was a retcon that would allow for the eventual reunion of Axel with his best friend in the physical life. Like the Phoenix rising from the ashes, he could resurrect him from the dead. And that was the underlying idea of making Lea a Keyblade wielder in the first place.

Lea and Isa's backstory is one of the missing links of the KH series. By all means, it should have been depicted many years ago, in the defunct Birth by Sleep Volume II. This is a shame because it left their relationship extremely underdeveloped, and their reunion was largely glossed over in KH3 as a result. Because of this, I thought Axel's storyline in KH3 fell flat, and I thought that his ending in KH2 was more impactful. But I may change my mind if we finally get to see more of Axel's long overdue backstory in Missing Link.

[daisyllun]

Hear me out…why the more i learn about these two as characters, i feel like their interactions together would feel raw and real, like their dynamics nor them feel like tropes,, but two legit human beings interacting.

And how they are so layered. their different experiences and differences in character shapes them in a way that makes them complementary. and the fact that they share so many similar themes, how they both share the feelings of loneliness, pressure to pursue perfection, the struggle to coming into terms with being human, freedom, wanting love, the way they feel like they don’t belong, like there’s always this yearning for home..ectect.

It feels like they are connected in such subtle ways, and you can grasp it if you dig deeper into them as characters.

Tbh out of every character in the manga these two feel like they would understand each other the most, they’re like two people destined to meet if that makes sense.

[badass-queer-couples-battle]

Propaganda:

For Joongdok: "Well first of all Yoo Joonghyuk has a whole arc that is transfem coded as hell (has a power/technique that can technically only be used by women but somehow he can also use it, for a time he even turns into a woman to wield it and it's. Actually just let me get the quote "The ines of the face had changed but it was clearly Yoo Joonghyuk. No, it was even more than before.") that just kinda happens,, and doesn't get brought up again but anyway. Second of all just look at them. You see the vision. Also a bonus observation is that these two often get shipped in a poly ship with Han Sooyoung and whenever I see people make a "regular couple, yaoi couple, yuri couple, I see no difference love is love" meme with them the combination of which pair among these three is which of the categories is always different"

Note: This submission also mentions Han Sooyoung, but I decided to count this polyship submission as guy yuri as well.

"They love each other, they pretend they don't care for each other but all their actions prove they care too much, if you remove someone from the trio then the resulting duo is extremely dysfunctional, as evidenced by more than a million words of canon. Is it technically guy yuri? Well, Han Sooyoung is a woman, but in a way she's one of the guys. Kim Dokja and Yoo Joonghyuk are men, but the text heavily hints that Yoo Joonghyuk is a trans woman who's just too busy and stressed out to transition yet, and Kim Dokja has just never thought about his own gender a single day in his life. They made the world for each other, they went back in time countless times and waged countless wars for each other, they wrote and read and lived a story, their story, for each other and that's what saved them all. The way Han Sooyoung writes Yoo Joonghyuk's story to save Kim Dokja and loses herself in the process, the way Yoo Joonghyuk voluntarily lives the story to the point of losing himself too and even forgetting why he originally decided to do it, the way Kim Dokja read Han Sooyoung's story which was Yoo Joonghyuk's life and that's how he found himself, they all took so much from each other and gave so much of themselves to each other, this is all very yuri."

"they're so yuri you have no idea. they have every staple of a yuri ship. unwavering devotion. waiting dozens or thousands of years for each other. dooming themselves and the world for each other. so much yearning. i also see them genderbent a lot (including inn canon in the case of yjh) and they're right both of these people are women. i genuinely can't even see them strictly as men at this point they're just yjh and kdj and they are yuri do you understand."

"they're so yuri. the abscense of yuri is the presence of yuri etc etc. these two guys are all ABOUT abscenses. also one of them is a part time woman. the other guy is a guy but like in the same way a square is a rectangle. anyway they're so guyyuri to me. bonus points also because they have a mutual girlfriend and when she's present they're girlyaoi but that's not relevant to this specifically"

For Destiel: "There’s got something wrong with her(complementary)"

[murakamijeva-muza]

“The Greek word for "return" is nostos. Algos means "suffering." So nostalgia is the suffering caused by an unappeased yearning to return. To express that fundamental notion most Europeans can utilize a word derived from the Greek (nostalgia, nostalgie) as well as other words with roots in their national languages: añoranza, say the Spaniards; saudade, say the Portuguese. In each language these words have a different semantic nuance. Often they mean only the sadness caused by the impossibility of returning to one's country: a longing for country, for home. What in English is called "homesickness." Or in German: Heimweh. In Dutch: heimwee. But this reduces that great notion to just its spatial element. One of the oldest European languages, Icelandic (like English) makes a distinction between two terms: söknuour: nostalgia in its general sense; and heimprá: longing for the homeland. Czechs have the Greek-derived nostalgie as well as their own noun, stesk, and their own verb; the most moving, Czech expression of love: styska se mi po tobe ("I yearn for you," "I'm nostalgic for you"; "I cannot bear the pain of your absence"). In Spanish añoranza comes from the verb añorar (to feel nostalgia), which comes from the Catalan enyorar, itself derived from the Latin word ignorare (to be unaware of, not know, not experience; to lack or miss), In that etymological light nostalgia seems something like the pain of ignorance, of not knowing. You are far away, and I don't know what has become of you. My country is far away, and I don't know what is happening there. Certain languages have problems with nostalgia: the French can only express it by the noun from the Greek root, and have no verb for it; they can say Je m'ennuie de toi (I miss you), but the word s'ennuyer is weak, cold -- anyhow too light for so grave a feeling. The Germans rarely use the Greek-derived term Nostalgie, and tend to say Sehnsucht in speaking of the desire for an absent thing. But Sehnsucht can refer both to something that has existed and to something that has never existed (a new adventure), and therefore it does not necessarily imply the nostos idea; to include in Sehnsucht the obsession with returning would require adding a complementary phrase: Sehnsucht nach der Vergangenheit, nach der verlorenen Kindheit, nach der ersten Liebe (longing for the past, for lost childhood, for a first love).” ― Milan Kundera, Ignorance

[lunaefall]

Okay but the Renheng content in Blade's trailer is so insanely packed?

We see freaking past Blade and Dan Heng, confirming our theories about them knowing each other and being close in the past, from the bracer lore.

And the backgrounds solidify that Blade had light in his life and Dan Heng brought darkness to it, which is a colour theme continuing in their fight.

The reenactment of the Nowhere to Run light cone is honestly insane too.

And let's talk about red and green being complementary colours, along with black and white being thematic opposites.

The constant spider lilies, a flower representing death and the afterlife, as well the candles being snuffed out as Blade takes lives, but his own candle never burns out, representing his immortality — yeah, he's yearning for death and hates his immortal existence.

Putting all these together, it's becoming more obvious that Dan Heng made Blade immortal. There were hints in Nightmare and the HSR launch trailer, as well as the relic lore, but this really solidifies it.

(Gonna be a clown on Wednesday when it turns out Pom-Pom made Blade immortal or something, I don't know.)

[emilyzipps]

how do you build up the tension between two characters without dragging it out or jumping the gun by rushing it?

This is a great question! I mostly write romance/romcoms so I'm going to answer this about building romantic tension, but I'm guessing it works for other kinds as well.

As always, please feel free to reblog or comment with your thoughts, suggestions, disagreements!

The first thing that comes to mind for me is to think about all of the ways they're going to show their progression into the romance--their relationship milestones--and make sure they're spread out in a way that feels balanced and good.

In a romance, the things you're aiming for as relationship milestones will vary depending on what type of book you're writing. If it's a steamy enemies to lovers story, the sex will start pretty early into the book, so the will-they-or-won't-they isn't about sex, it's about feelings. The big milestones in that case might be things like

admitting attraction

hooking up

sex

first feelings of romance (you shove them under a rug)

first feelings of romance (you admit to yourself you have them)

first time testing out if they like you as more than an sex partner

first time admitting you liiiiike them

first time them admitting they liiiiike you

love confession/happily ever after

On the flip side, a slow burn friends to lovers (no steam), it may be things like

noticing she's pretty

touching hands by accident on the bus

touching hands ON PURPOSE on the bus

lingering stares

staying up all night talking

picking her up from a date with someone else and being so sad

trying to date someone else

spending the night together AS FRIENDS

erotic hair braiding

happily ever after

Once you think through what some of those milestones will be for your story and your characters, then you can figure out how you want to spread those out throughout your story. Tension comes in the spaces between those milestones and in yearning for the next one, so you need to give space for each milestone to (a) be exciting! (b) be celebrated (or feared or repressed or whatever) and (c) get old enough that we're pining for the next one. That's why you go from touching hands by accident to being brave and terrified and anxious when you decide to do it on purpose.

With the right build up--the pining for the feel of her smooth skin against yours, the noticing how her hands look, day dreaming about her fingers, picturing yourself touching her hand a million times, barely breathing--finally touching her hand on the bus can be as emotionally resonant as sex or a love confession.

consider each milestone as a small emotional climax (sex jokes are welcome and frankly appropriate), and treat it in the way you'd treat the big story climax.

The other thing I'm thinking about is the disconnect between what they say/show and what they think. In my debut novel, the first time Alice sees Van, her inner monologue is immediately like OMG GIRL HOT!!!! THIS BUTCH IS STUNNING AND SMELLS SO GOOD I WANT HER TO TOUCH MEEEEEEEEE. What she actually says out loud is more along the lines of "hi, nice to meet you, i'm your brother's formerly secret girlfriend."

That creates tension because the reader then (hopefully!) thinks, oh wow, how long can Alice keep it together when she's such a bisexual disaster? How long can she go without revealing how badly she wants Van to jump her?

Here's a little map of our milestones and interior/exterior:

first meeting. Alice thinks: GIRL HOT. Alice says: hi i am dating your brother??

first flirt. Alice thinks: if she touches me i'm going to fucking lose it (complementary). Alice says: thanks for the ride home, your dog is cute.

first admit you like each other. Alice thinks: i want to never leave her house or her presence. Alice says: you should be really proud of the life you've built here.

first cuddle. Alice thinks: i'm going to die. i'm actually, physically going to die under this snuggie. this girl is so hot and kind and i'm obsessed with her oh my GOD. Alice says: your mom seems nice.

Those are kind of silly examples, but I hope it helps to be able to see that we're waiting for her inner monologue to match her actions, and the stakes for both get higher and higher as they move through the milestones until the moment when she (a) says what she's thinking, and (b) gets what she wants. Aka, HAPPILY EVER AFTER, BABY.

thoughts, feedback, other suggestions, questions? bring them!

[airplane69]

Scum villain/sha po lang xover or something

In which the system needs plot points corrected, and it appears that its first choices have been pawned by another system. Hmph! This won't stop system from correcting the plot!

So. It selects two complementary characters from a different world to fulfil the plot: Chang geng, a young man yearning for purpose, and his guardian (emphasis on the GUARD), gu yun. The system, in its infinite wisdom, places them in their rightful roles as The Protagonist and The God of War

Then the system watches in horror as Chang Geng destroys the entire premise of PIDW

[dsudis]

Talk Shop Tuesday: If you could immediately pluck one story/concept/idea from your brain and have it fully formed in front of you, exactly as you would want, what would that idea be? Can you describe it to us, along with any potential factors that are slowing you down/blocking you from creating it in the first place? Thanks! <3 -@fieldsofview

Oh, boy, that is a question!

My first thought is that I'd like to have When Two Become One (or, oh dear, Little and Broken, but Still Good) completed, just to not have the dangling WIP to worry about.

But really, honestly, if I was sitting here with the one-use-only magical wishing stone that would take a story from my brain and give me a ready-to-release perfect version of it? I would ask it to finish the historical-with-magic m/m romance that I started writing a bit over five years ago and had plotted five followups to.

It's such a great story! It has magical soulbonds that are made, not found! It has a whole system of gay marriage fitted into a historical setting in a way that I personally find satisfying and logical! It has the obstacle to marriage between our heroes being that they are too exactly well-matched for each other (and therefore it's painfully difficult to determine which of them ought to become a non-person and lose his independent inheritance and social status by becoming the dependent spouse of the other, because it's 1834 and somebody has to not be a whole legal person anymore after they get married, that's the rules).

It has COMPLEMENTARY MAGICAL ABILITIES REVEALING ROMANTIC COMPATIBILITY. It has YEARNING. It has a DUEL (well, almost) and a huge historic disaster that our heroes get swept up in, leading to SWOONING FROM MAGICAL EXHAUSTION. It has the baby sister who the hero wants to protect SOLVING PROBLEMS HERSELF, with the help of her trans girlfriend. (It has magical gender affirmation for trans people, because what kind of magical setting would it be if it didn't??) It has a HORRIBLE COUSIN WHO WILL INHERIT THE ESTATE who turns out in a subsequent book to be not really horrible at all so much as, you know, autistic and traumatized and dashed awkward in sensitive situations, and in need of just the right adorable twink to understand him and love him.

It unfortunately has a terminal lack of writing momentum due to me picking away at it through all the years when my writing had not come home from the wars, and so I just feel sort of exhausted every time I think about figuring out what the fuck happens in chapter five and how to put that into words and sentences and paragraphs, so I've stuck it in the drawer and moved on to things that I feel a bit less daunted by, although just this second I feel daunted by every activity more complicated than playing Cake Sort on my phone and watching a lot of Air Crash Investigations, because life is a lot right now.

But if I just had this novel straight from the wishing stone, I could read it, and I'm sure I would love the whole thing again and be ready to write the next five books, and also I could publish the dear thing and tell people it's a bit like a KJ Charles (with less murder) or Jordan L Hawk (with less eldritch horror), and it would probably sell pretty decently and I could be firmly on the way with my five year plan to be able to do more writing and less day-jobbing. And that would be awfully nice.

[anndramarama]

Dihua fic recipe. Suitable for beginner and experienced cooks.

Add Li Lianhua's fear of intimacy and Di Feisheng's lack of boundaries to a medium saucepan with a generous tablespoon of the self-loathing/anger/guilt felt by both parties regarding 1) their past failures and 2) the helplessness brought on by corruption and betrayal within their martial organizations.

Whisk aggressively.

Keep in mind that both ingredients are touch-starved martial geniuses who struggled to tell the difference between sexual attraction and the impulse to fight nearly to the death.

As orphans whose education was incomplete or completely lacking, you might assert that these ingredients should not be served together at the same banquet, let alone combined in such a way, but be patient and trust the recipe even if it's hard at the start.

Di Feisheng in particular will constantly assert that he wants to be "on top" and not know what that means or why it makes Li Xiangyi's eyes flash and cheeks turn pink before he fights him harder, ever harder.

Li Xiangyi will be baffled when their relationship doesn't seem to change no matter how many brain-breaking orgasms he wrings out of the other man, or how many kisses are shared, and will arrange several more negotiations and secret meetings than strictly necessary to try to establish the ultimate, final, total, and most all-encompassing peace the jianghu has ever seen.

But don't worry: Li Xiangyi's bafflement and Di Feisheng's trauma-induced cluelessness are complementary flavors that will only add spice to the dish.

When you get to the point where you're tired of stirring it will still be almost impossible to keep them from separating in the pan, so don't even try. In fact it is essential to the recipe that their essences separate and come together continually in a clash of swords, an exchange of looks, and other forms of rough, suggestive touching.

(Give up on plot at this point. You don't need that, it's expensive, and hardly anyone will notice. You can throw in some implausible machinations by side characters later if you're concerned.)

Next, add two cups of salted water and bring to a roaring boil. Reduce heat, cover, and let simmer for ten years.

Ignore any sounds of anguish that escape the pan. This is a necessary step that lets them work things out, if only mentally and in the form of heated, yearning nightmares (Li Xiangyi) and repetitive, dissociative hallucinations that for anyone else would be indistinguishable from pining (Di Feisheng).

Finally, uncover and get ready to plate.

At this point both ingredients' idealism, which could barely be detected as a standalone flavor to begin with, should assert itself and almost dazzle the senses, if only briefly. As they slowly re-enter the world together that synchronicity will bring with it a renewed appreciation for life, for gentleness and roughness as appropriate, for tantalizing secrets and lies, and extra time for boning behind closed doors. They will feel young together, and then they will feel middle-aged; Di Feisheng will let himself feel real emotions and, watching him both in and out of bed, Li Xiangyi -- now Li Lianhua -- will wish he had more time.

Add a dash of Fang Duobing at the end, but keep in mind that he isn't just there for garnish: when introduced in the right amounts Fang Duobing can add to the flavor and complexity of the dish, particularly by improving its general sweetness and, for the two main ingredients, he adds an extra note of innocence tempered by regret, sacrifice, and love.

Serve with wedding wine, in secret, under a crescent moon on a day that no one else knows is auspicious.

[extraordinaryhistories]

#22 - 'Far Physician's Son' (non-album track, 2001)

Somewhere early in his career, Sufjan Stevens discovered something incredible: acoustic guitars could be strummed. Before this point, Sufjan did one of two things on the acoustic. He would fingerpick, which made up the bulk of his nascent folk material, and it sounded great (just as it would later in his career, when he became iconic for this sound.) Or he would bash. The sound he gets out of his guitar on a song like ‘A Winner Needs a Wand’ isn’t a strum, it’s an attack, ugly chords getting hammered out of his guitar. There was rarely an in-between. If you want a soft song, you pick; if you want a loud song, you bash. Such was the binary along which he operated for a while.

Then something changed. There was a realisation. There was no need for all this abuse; just sit with it and strum. Listen to the word escaping from the guitar – strum. Listen to all the beautiful resonances. Listen to the syllables as they play across the strings. Listen – really listen – to how the sound fills the space. Listen to six notes interacting as they choose. And then: out of it let music pour.

When Sufjan finally lent himself over to this most traditional of folk guitar styles, he created some really gorgeous work. His feel for writing chord progressions was developing rapidly, and that’s essential for strummed guitar, one of the more direct ways of conveying complex harmonic movement. Suddenly he was evolving out of elementary uses of the instrument, like those we see on ‘Happy Birthday’; the melodies were now being supported with a harmonic framing that served as the yin to their yang, a complementary – but slightly distinct – source of light and colour. A less immediately evident source of the refinement of Sufjan’s music, but one that’s present nearly everywhere, if you care to look for it.

Find it, if you will, in ‘Far Physician’s Son’. This song’s provenance is typically obscure: it was released with three other Sufjan songs on 8.21: A Blue Bunny Compilation, and if you haven’t heard of it, it’s because just about nobody has. On it you will find ‘Woman at the Well’, an early version of ‘Year of the Ox’, and then this, sandwiched between a tinny slacker rock song and a long slab of musique concrète. Listening to it in sequence is quite striking. Sufjan spent about fifteen years of his career (up until Carrie and Lowell) relishing in the fact that he was sort of uncool, an oddball English major writing knowingly kitschy songs based on musical tropes that were very much not in vogue, certainly not in the indie sphere. 8.21: A Blue Bunny Compilation is the perfect microcosm of what Sufjan was becoming as an artist. In the midst of all this wild laissez-faire experimentation comes this, a precious, beautifully-performed folk ode to Jesus. Not quite the recipe to win the alternative glitterati over, is it?

So yes, like ‘Joy! Joy! Joy!’, like ‘Woman at the Well’, like ‘God’ll Ne’er Let You Down’ and a host of others, ‘Far Physician’s Son’ is orthodox in just about every sense. The one daring element here is the time signature. It is our second-ever Sufjan song to feature 5/4 metre, and he continues to demonstrate here his natural gift for making non-standard timing sound like nothing out of the ordinary. This is one of those uncommon songs in five that sounds as effortless as the flowing of a stream – it might take several listens (around five, in my case) before you pick up on any strangeness at all.

We can attribute that effortlessness to the guitar playing. There’s that word – strum ­– wide, yearning chords, played at a confident pace, that fill up both channels with their close-miced honey. The assuredness of the rhythm draws the ear away from the metric oddities perfectly, make it sound orthodox despite being anything but. This is the first time an acoustic guitar has sounded this rich on a Sufjan song, and thankfully by no means the last – but songs like these are the origin point of so much of Sufjan’s later sophistication. The arrangement here is otherwise remarkably tasteful. Some flutes here, some vibraphone there, all following the vocal melody, nothing feeling garish or out-of-place. ‘Far Physician’s Son’ is not a song designed to challenge you. Sometimes, orthodoxy can be undervalued.

Thus we are encouraged to focus on the symbiosis that underpins all the finest Sufjan songs: the slow-dance between lyrics and melody. Predictably for this man’s early work, ‘Far Physician’s Son’ is a song about Jesus. (As an aside, I have at times theorised that Sufjan was considering a full-blown career pivot to Christian contemporary music around the turn of the millennium, given how nearly every vocal track written between A Sun Came and Michigan is explicitly religious. Religion as a thematic focus came back in a big way on Seven Swans, of course, but there it is treated with more complexity and metaphor than ever before. Early throwaways like ‘Far Physician’s Son’ accept the premise of God’s fundamental goodness without question. Simplistic? Yes, but then again, so many beautiful things are.)

‘Far Physician’s Son’ is a mostly straightforward song that references a passage in Luke 4, where Jesus goes to the synagogue of Nazareth (‘Went to Galilee / With the scroll again’) and announces himself as a saviour – the man who will save humanity from the ills that befall them (‘Heal the poor and stung / Steal the hurt and hung’.) The song emphasises Jesus’ fundamental humanity, and thus his staggering glory; he is ‘Joseph’s son’, child of a common man but saviour of the wider world. Again, there’s not much to this one, but there doesn’t need to be. Jesus’ goodness – his ‘is’-ness – is self-evident. It is written that the person who speaks to God in a few honest words is blessed over the person who speaks to God with ego and articulation. No more words are really required in a song like this than the repeated refrain, the ideological core of the song that inhabits its latter half: ‘he will arise, he will arise’.

It's that phrase, and the melody attached to it, that always beguiles me when I listen to ‘Far Physician’s Son’. This is a feathery song, with lighter-than-air melodies and effete instrumentation – and yet we find this great counterweight at the end of the song, ‘he will arise’, repeated ad infinitum, with its doggedly deep and flat melody. It takes me out of the song sometimes. And yet there is a keen reason to it. ‘He will arise’ is the final truth of the New Testament, the promise and end state of Christianity, the thing above all things. Of course it has to sound weighty. Of course it has to read like a mantra in the context of the song, Sufjan singing it over, and over, and over. It’s only logic. It’s only everything.

Addendum: literally mere weeks before I wrote this, a Sufjan show from the year 2000 was unearthed, and a rendition of ‘Far Physician’s Son’ was in it. A pretty standard version, but a version nonetheless. Massive news for annoying people.

[quillkiller]

hey hi it’s pandalily anon I think I’ve contemplated them to the point of not being able to articulate it but for you…I try

Canonically, a lot of what we get about Lily is in terms of how she’s viewed by others - a good, kind, loving student, friend, wife, mother. and I think she can absolutely embody those things!! but I also think a part of her is clawing at the cage of those expectations that’s been built around her. She managed to disappoint and ostracize her sister and her childhood best friend by being herself so why the fuck would she have any confidence in exploring who she is and experimenting with her own identity?

Pandora is the inverse but also complementary? If that makes sense? she’s intrinsically motivated so other people’s expectations don’t hold the same weight and she’s endlessly curious, following interests on a whim. I think she’d be fascinated by Lily and respectfully I do see her having the kind of superiority complex where she looks at Lily and goes I can fix her (make her more like Pandora). Lily would find a certain comfort and freedom in Pandora giving her space to explore while also introducing Pandora to the idea that nice is not necessarily equivalent to being boring or a pushover (even if Lily does have pushover tendencies)

Im running out of words and this already feels like a gross oversimplification of their dynamic but do you see it?? do you get it??

HELLO 🤍

i do see it !!! and i go get it !!! i haven’t dabbled too much in pandalily, but i do like them. i think i just usually prefer them with other people. anyway, when i have dabbled, this is genuinely exactly how i consider them. like why are you in my head….

they’re a bg ship in my emmaryjames fic, and the lore for them is literally pandora with her god complex and how she just sees right through lily, making her the first one ever (as far as lily knows) to actually see her. lily has been yearning for exactly that since forever but when it actually happens it makes her soooooo uncomfortable at first. she’s used to being a blank canvas that people project onto and here comes this socially awkward weirdo with a god-complex and calls her right out from the start. lily is equally uncomfortable by it as she is intrigued and drawn to pandora. in my fic i explore a little bit how their eventual relationship sort or shocks people, because people think they know lily but they don’t. <- this is why i love!!! exploring lilys awful self hating lesbian awakening as an adult and how people will tell her that she’s so boring now, what happened to you, you used to be so fun. but like…. was she really ever any of those things ??? or was she just this blank canvas for men to project onto……. like, the girl next door never existed, she was always entirely made up by lilys desire to be as normal as she can possibly be…..

i think there’s a lot talk about when it comes to pandalily… maybe i should explore them more… it’s very interesting to imagine them coming together, lily keeping them earth bound and pandora making them hover just slightly over ground .. chefs kiss

[bittersweetresilience]

sunny... give me ur top 5 renjing things THAT MADE U START SHIPPING RENJING. i want to understand

THANKS FOR ASKING BELOVED GET READY FOR MY YAPPING

jing yuan's voiceline about blade... "if he were to forget everything, it would make things a lot easier for me." drives me insane. the themes of memory in renjing are so 🫠🫠🫠 they are both such yearners but one of them yearns so quietly because he knows things are different now and he has been left and he will be left again and the other doesn't even understand his feelings or that he is capable of having human feelings i have to cry about them infinitely. blade is the only person left who truly knew jing yuan as he was and the only person capable of taking care of him as he is. and jing yuan is the only person left who truly remembers and cherishes yingxing and the only person who still understands blade to be him and not a weapon

their complementary narrative arcs and characters and their compatibility in every way... dark hair and light hair... colors of death and colors of life... the one who leaves and the one who stays... the one who changed and the one who stagnated except they are both both of those things... the almost roleswap in the fact that yingxing was a short life species but now he goes on endlessly, while jing yuan was meant to have outlived him but now will fall to mara long before blade reaches his own finish...

YINGJING. that yingxing made starfall reverie and jing yuan kept it for all these centuries... that they bickered with each other as youths and were still so close that yingxing would make a mechanical lion out of scrap parts for him... that they gayly looked at each other and at no one else over cups of wine in scalegorge waterscape and that jing yuan thought of this right as jingliu and blade were fighting... 🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠 childhood friends to lovers to strangers or almost enemies to lovers again truly...

the way blade says jing yuan's name every chance he gets while jing yuan avoids saying blade's name whenever he can... the way blade gets jealous of luocha and the way jing yuan is cold toward kafka... they're so tragic exes

and lastly in terms of what keeps me shipping them, their RANGE. they can be domestic and married. they can be violent and toxic. they can be unrequited. they can be requited but still have an unhappy ending. they're so doomed. they're so destined. they're so intrinsically linked to one another and it's impossible to separate their themes. they're literally the only two character trailers* whose music can be overlaid with each other perfectly. and they have the hottest most unsafe sex

[thetzar]

Zuko & Azula's Dynamic

Zuko and Azula's relationship in the animated series "Avatar: The Last Airbender" is complex and multifaceted, marked by a combination of rivalry, familial bonds, and the effects of their troubled upbringing. Throughout the series, their relationship undergoes significant changes, revealing the depths of their connection and the impact of their individual journeys.

Sibling Rivalry: Zuko and Azula's relationship is characterized by intense sibling rivalry. Growing up, they were constantly pitted against each other by their father, Fire Lord Ozai, who favored Azula for her prodigious firebending abilities. This rivalry creates a competitive dynamic between them, leading to various confrontations and clashes.

Complementary Qualities: Despite their rivalry, Zuko and Azula possess complementary qualities. Zuko is driven by his sense of honor and seeks redemption, while Azula is cunning, manipulative, and power-hungry. Their differences in approach and personality often lead to conflicts but also highlight their contrasting strengths.

Family Expectations: Both Zuko and Azula grapple with the weight of their family's expectations. Zuko struggles to live up to his father's standards and gain his approval, while Azula internalizes her father's ruthless nature and strives to become the perfect heir to the Fire Nation throne. These shared struggles contribute to their complex relationship and influence their actions throughout the series.

Betrayal and Emotional Impact: Zuko's betrayal of Iroh marked a significant turning point in his life. The days when Uncle Iroh refused to engage in conversation with Zuko during his visits had a profound impact on him, pushing him to the brink of madness and leaving him in a state of confusion. Similarly, Azula experienced a deep betrayal from her two closest friends, Tylee and Mai, which triggered intense paranoia and gradually led to her mental deterioration.

Abused and Neglected Impact: Both Siblings unfortunately were abused by their father and Neglected. Zuko was physically, emotionally and Mentally abused by his father, he was also mostly Neglected by Firelord Ozai. Azula on the other hand she was Mentally abused thus the result from her notorious crimes thinking that to do what she is being told by her father is the only way to gain his love. Ursa neglected Azula emotional and physical (No Hugs) she had a significant role in preventing Azula from heading down the wrong path sadly she did not.

Redemption and Reconciliation: Despite their tumultuous history, Zuko still yearns for a connection with his sister and seeks to help her find redemption. In "Avatar: The Last Airbender," Zuko's unwavering belief in his sister's potential for change leads him to confront her in the Agni Kai, where he ultimately saves her from self-destruction. This act demonstrates his willingness to forgive and reconcile with Azula, showing the complex nature of their bond.

Overall, Zuko and Azula's relationship is characterized by a blend of rivalry, conflicting loyalties, and shared history. While their interactions are often marked by tension and animosity, they also showcase moments of empathy and a desire for connection. Their relationship serves as a nuanced exploration of sibling dynamics, the impact of parental expectations, and the possibility of redemption in the face of personal struggles.

Zuko's 16 Years Old & Azula's 14 Years Old