#colours lose all meaning pretty quick i find. like yeah this looks great! (hides filter) oh no. its all wonky

[arsenicflame]

(I am still in love with you, can't admit it yet)

[alpaca-writes]

Mystics, Chapter 19

When Arch becomes hired on at Mystics by the strange shopkeeper Lyrem Nomadus, everything seems to be going well- in fact, their life nearly becomes perfection. Soon enough, however, Arch realizes that perhaps not everything is as perfect as it seems….

Read Chapters 1-18 and more HERE

Taglist: @myst-in-the-mirror, @livingforthewhump

CW: psychological whump, emotional whump, memory whump, angst... like so much, Lyrem centric chapter

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CHAPTER NINETEEN: A BLAST FROM THE PAST

        Daffodils and tiger lilies.

        Lyrem had to admit that they went well together. The sunshine colours would brighten the deathly cold winter’s day in an instant, and he desperately needed some warmth right now. The frigid January day was threatening to bring him under the tide of darkness. He had been away for a while. A job that was supposed to take a week turned into a month of running around and making deals with all sorts to please a certain U.S. senator. A republican, no less. He was dying to have Maria back in his arms again. It had been too long.

        The radio lit up on its own.

        “-great start to 1991 from Janet Jackson, folks! Next up we have Madonna with ‘Justify My Love’”-

        “Scared?”

        Paimon appeared in the passenger seat. Lyrem looked past him to glance at the bright yellow door at the end of the walkway. The snow had been cleared already, and the lights in the house were all out save for the porch.

        “Why would I be scared?” he asked.

        “You missed Christmas. Women love Christmas. They build up so much hope and sing Baby Please Come Home!” Paimon chuckled. “And you know, if you’re not coming, then she might be singing it to someone else- in more ways than one, if you know what I mean.”

        Lyrem scowled at him and opened his truck door. It closed with a loud creaking at the hinges and being stupid in the moment, re-opened the door to retrieve the lovely blooms that he had picked out.

        “She’s my true love,” he stated, peering in to Paimon. “Isn’t that what you promised me? She’d never hurt me like that. She’d never betray me.”

        “She’s not a robot, Lyrem, she’s a human being with control over her own choices. Even true love can’t compete with free will.” Paimon shrugged and forced a small smile. “But, you know, perhaps she’s one of those really special ones. You best take care of her.”

        Lyrem grew disgusted at the insinuation and slammed the door. Paimon had already vanished into thin air.

        Before he realized it, he was facing the yellow door, and holding the flowers close to shield them from the cold. The door was unlocked, and he stepped through. It was just after dinner-time. Something about the house felt wrong. There was too much energy. Lyrem wasn’t much of a psychic, but he could feel the heat in the air- oppressive and… suffocating. The words that Paimon had spoken lingered in the back of his mind- or maybe it was the front of his mind disguised as the back of his mind…

        Get rid of the thoughts Lyrem. They are not yours-

        He turned, kicking off his shoes and flicked on the light.

        “SURPRISE!”-

        He ditched the flowers, and pressed his back against the door. Lyrem prepared to defend himself with a knife that would have been on his person if it weren’t for security confiscating it as he tried to take it as carry-on. The rest of the lights in the house lit themselves with the help of some extra hands from recognizable faces- but Lyrem was on high-alert. They may as well have been strangers. In reality, they were friends. 

Well, Maria’s friends. Lyrem didn’t have any friends- not human friends.

        There was a bright flash of light, that caught his scowling glare and froze it in time. The grinning face of a dark-haired man looked back at him over the camera as it spit out a polaroid.

        Slowly, Lyrem caught himself up. There were streamers of bright colours draped along the ceiling and a shining banner that read HAPPY BIRTHDAY hung across the entranceway to the living room. Realizing that his reaction to the event was less than ideal, he smiled. Maria popped in front of him, escaping her hiding spot from behind the couch.

        “What… what is all this?” Lyrem started. He knew what it was. It was his 42nd Birthday, but he wasn’t exactly thrilled.

        “It’s your birthday, you goose!” Maria wrapped her arms around him, and kissed him quickly on the lips.

        “Right.” He picked up the flowers off the floor, and handed them to her, in a less ceremonial fashion than he was hoping.

        “Awe, aren’t you sweet.” She accepted them and played with the petals idly. “You forgot last year’s too, but this time, when I heard you’d be coming home, I knew you couldn’t miss out on Christmas and a birthday party! Just wouldn’t be right.” She ran off into the kitchen, abandoning him.

        The rest of the guests, couples mostly milled about and filtered into the hall. Lyrem nodded and smiled to them kindly.

        “Good trip?”

        He nodded, taking the questions like a politician surrounded by nosey reporters.

        “Where did you have to go this time?” Kelly, a blonde lady with thick lenses in her bright pink bifocals inquired of him. Her husband wrapped an arm around her waist. Lyrem always forgot his name but it was something very basic. He was the one with the camera.

        Valhalla. “Norway,” he replied.

        “Remind me, what is it that you do again, Lyrem?” the husband asked.

        “I’m… a liaison. A third-party negotiator of sales. Very boring work, I assure you.”

        “Oh? What kind of sales?”

        “Depends on the client,” he answered shortly. “I’m a freelancer.”

        “Happy Birthday, to you… Happy Birthday, to you…

                    Happy Birthday, dear Lyremmm, Happy Birthday too you!”

         The chorus of voices broke out amongst the chit-chat as Maria carried the cake all the way into the hall. It was lit up and lighting up her face. Kelly’s husband lifted the camera, and snapped a quick photo.

         “What are you all still doing in the hallway?” She snapped playfully. “Get in the dining room already so we can eat cake and play Pictionary.”

        They all filtered off to the dining room to the side of the Georgian style house. Kelly ran off to bring in the wine that had been left chilling in the fridge. Her husband handed off the pictures to Lyrem.

        “This one of you didn’t turn out, I don’t know what happened. Your face went all black and fuzzy- but this one of Maria’s looking pretty cute, eh?”

        Lyrem took the photos graciously and clicked his tongue.

        “Philly, could you open this one for me?” Kelly ushered her husband away to help with the wine bottles. She giggled out loud and sneered. “I have the worst grip.”

        “Lyrem!” Maria scolded. “You need to blow out your candles! Make a wish!”

        He sighed. He wished that the party would be over. He wished that these people would go home. He wished he could get a night alone with his fiancée. He wished that he could find something… anything that would bring him comfort. Then, he wished he wasn’t constantly wondering if he was a bad man.

        And that was all he wished even before he reached the end of the table.

        By the time he leaned over the cake he was completely out of wishes, but blew out the candles anyway. Maria smiled. He loved it when she did that.

        The room went dark, delving into the shadows and engulfed by the confusion, Lyrem blinked, and realized suddenly that he wasn’t back in the old Georgian house, with Maria and surrounded by friends and… Phillip.

         . . . . . . . .

        “No, go back!” A light voice said through the dark.

        “Persephone, it is unkind to spy on the lives of others, even if they are guests in our realm”-

        “Pfft,” the higher voice brushed off the scolding lower one. “This isn’t our realm and you know it.”

        “Nevertheless, he is our guest. We ought to treat him with respect.”

        “But I want to see them kiss again”-

        “Persephone, stop”-

         . . . . . . .

        Lyrem almost woke, but was jolted back to a time… different than his birthday and he lost control over his own mind once again.

        They were awake and lying in their bed, bodies bare and snuggling beneath the quilts as the powdery snow fell, piling against the bedroom window and onto the boughs of the trembling aspen outside. It was a bit less than a year later. They were married now. The little gold ring was on his finger and hers matched just as simply. Carolers were outside, they were a week too early, but then, he didn’t mind the soft sounds that seemed to leak their way in through the window on the second floor.

        He wasn’t looking out the window, entertained by counting the snowflakes like she was. He was enjoying her, watching her. Kissing her olive skin and wrapping himself in closer to her back as one hand played with her soft hair and the other stroked her waist. He felt like himself. He felt warm, and safe, and loved.

        “I have to tell you something.”

        He stopped kissing. Maria rolled over to face him and stared into his eyes. Suspiciously, he leaned his head away from hers and she pursed her lips nervously.

        “What do you need to tell me?” he prompted.

        Maria took a long breath, putting Lyrem on edge.

        “You were gone a long time for this last client, you know? I didn’t have a lot to do, and I tried to start my own travel company after Jet Rover let me go. I tried to stay busy… you know?”

        Lyrem nodded and swallowed. The travel agency went bankrupt soon after. Maria had been left by the wayside to pick up her life and start something new just before Lyrem needed to travel out to Belize for work. He came back with one hell of a tan. The tone of her voice grew shakier. The anxiety was growing stronger for both of them.

        “Yeah, yeah, I know.” He said gently. He was gone too often. For too long. Dammit all. He should have told Paimon to shove it instead of going along with his ridiculous schemes. Huitzilopochtli, an Aztec God of War, never did end up striking a deal with them to give the Pentagon a little morale boost after all. Lyrem ended up losing money in that charade too. Not the wisest bet he had ever made. He wouldn’t blame her for leaving him- for sleeping with another man. These winters were hell on earth, after all-

        “I bought a place,” she said.

        Lyrem twisted his face-

        “You bought a place?” he repeated, confused. They had a place. It was a beautiful place. He wasn’t always in it either. She didn’t need her own place.

        “On seventeenth. I thought to myself, you know, there is no point in me wandering around and trying to make a living for myself in travel if you’ll be off travelling for work too. And I can’t just eat, cook, and clean for myself all the time- I’d lose my mind so... I’m starting a business!”

        “Oh,” Lyrem’s eyes grew wide, and then interested. “What kind of business?”

        “I… I don’t know yet”- Maria grinned excitedly, glad that his interest was showing. “I just bought the space on a whim. I don’t even really know why. I just needed to do something.”

        “Well… That certainly is something.”

        “You don’t like the idea?” She asked. Puzzled by his sudden change in demeanour, taking it as a briefly condescending tone. 

        “No, no. It’s not that. I just…” he was lost in thought as the air grew chilled. He watched the skin on her shoulder pebble up as she sighed.

        “You thought I was about to tell you I was pregnant,” she surmised.

        “Mm.” he nodded, even if it wasn’t true.

        The thought of having children had crossed his mind. She wasn’t as old as he was. It wouldn’t be so risky to bring kids into this world except-

        “Not really on my mind, you know that,” she commented in a rush.

        He nodded again.

        “I know… But what if we did try?” the words fell out of his mouth suddenly and without much thought. Entertaining the idea of being a father was something that he often did before Maria had announced her opposition to the idea. Perhaps something had changed in her since she was let go from Jet Rover Travel Inc.

        She turned away from him, focusing on the snow as it fell from one white blanket to another.

        “I just... I don’t want to be a mother,” she said quietly.

        He didn’t remember how painful this moment was. Though quiet in her refusal, his heart was still brutally torn open by her words. That was her choice, and he would respect it. That didn’t make the reality any less painful to accept. True love didn’t include a perfect family. There wasn’t a written agreement for something like this, but if he wanted Maria to be happy, he would have to learn to live with her decision. He rolled off his side of the bed.

        “It’s fucking freezing in here, isn’t it?” he commented, rubbing one eye. “I’m going to turn up the heat.”

         . . . . .

        “Are you happy, now?” the voice from the darkness asked.

        “No, I thought there was more love here than that”- the light voice said annoyed. “Ugh! Did I skip over something?”

        “Look at what you put him through, the man is crying.”

        Lyrem searched the darkness as it quickly enveloped him once again. He remembered his place, a dead man reliving his time with Maria and how it had been squandered and painted with resentment.

        He always imagined it happier than this.

        “The poor thing was enraptured by her- there’s just something so bittersweet about that.”

        “Hey!” Lyrem shouted into the air angrily. “I can hear you, you know!”

        There was a low grunt from somewhere in the darkness. “We cannot waste our time. We need to find the right moment. The one with his call, or else we will never be able to find him again.”

        Lyrem spun around. There was nothing. Nothing up, nothing down, nothing anywhere. The voices, however, emerged from every direction.

        “Find who?!” Lyrem called out, brimming with frustration and an added vulnerability to the idea that these intruders could see whatever they wanted.

        “Fine,” Persephone settled reluctantly. Slowly, her voice faded away. “But I get to watch their wedding after! I want to see a happy ending after all this sadness…”