#clenches my fist

[tendermiasma]

I had more thoughts about Halsin being unable to keep his hands to himself

Full on Patreon 💧💧

[oooocleo]

imagine.. isometric pixel roleplay environments.... i dont know how to code but i love making little assets and thinking about putting little guys in them haha

**edit** added... sidetables.... this is addictive

[jadelemonadee]

uhhrh I’ve been feeling like absolute shit today and idk how to explain why 💔💔💔 it’s like..,,.,..ik ive already posted about this but i hate how i get jealous over other people’s art and success and it makes me feel so inferior when my art and other posts flop but when other people post about the exact same thing everyone eats it up!!!!!!! why not me!!!!!!!!!!!! am i just not as popular on the tumblrs or do y’all just not like me 😣/hj this is probably all because of mood swings or me overthinking or some other mysterious third reason but aaaghhg im just tired man 😭 i want to keep posting my art and stuff but this makes it really unmotivating AND I HATE ITTTTT

[nobodyexpectsthe]

okay most of my threads have been my dude getting softened up by compassion and love but i am craving his veilguard era where he's just been playing The Game for years and nobody can tie anything to him but you don't get good at the game by having spotless hands just superficially clean ones

wishlist:

pirith & the hero of ferelden having some serious clashes over how he's running things, especially regarding the banishment of the grey wardens.

working (potentially trying to blackmail, guilt trip, get on his knees and fucking beg for them to work with him beforehand) with any of the ancient elves to understand the truth of elvhen history and convince them to invest in the elves of today

any ship, but a transactional / potentially kind of toxic relationship where they're mutually using and/or lying to each other and are aware of it but are catching feelings anyway bc that is the game

fighting with any of the veilguard companions over his methods and the extremes he's willing to go in this hunt for solas

basically i crave conflict & if you want your character to have it out with someone who has become very 'ends justify the means' bc politics and war and constantly making impossible choices eat your soul, i'm here for you.

[tieria-erde]

had a sudden realization about the way i conceptualize ribbons in relation to alejandro. close enough welcome back warrior cats oc from a roleplay that died in 2022

[prnkill]

not wanting to post my hazbin art on my main accounts bc i've got mutuals that would lose their shit if they knew i liked hazbin but still wanting to post the art....

[incendiorum]

me + being home = look at freyja

[stupid-idiot-man]

Y'all can't tell me that with Seam being a mysterious old seapkeeper that they won't have a big role at some point!

[tvrningout-a]

     so i mentioned before that tengen gives me the vibe of someone who thinks they’re the best and worst at the same time, depending on when you catch them, and here’s why!! uhh warning: this one’s a doozy of a headcanon, meaning it’s long as hell :’ ) 

personal blogs, do not interact!

     first of all, thank you ufotable for giving us extra scenes that let us see more of tengen and his wives bc that contributed to this headcanon <3 deviations that anime tend to take aren’t always for the better, but in this case, i’m really happy with the changes they made bc i feel like we can get a better look at tengen’s mindset/motivations. but let me not get ahead of myself here!!

     i know that tengen’s intro is him proclaiming himself a god, and generally he gives off the impression that he thinks highly of himself. when gyutaro asks, “ you’re their savior, aren’t you? ...their affection and gratitude toward you know no bounds, huh? ” he even eggs the upper moon on by saying, “ i’m a flashy, glamorous ladies’ man, so that’s a no-brainer. and i even have three wives no less. ” he is trying to provoke gyutaro, but tengen is well aware that he’s someone who naturally gains admiration and envy bc he’s tall, handsome, strong, and yeah -- he’s got three wives!

     so i don’t think tengen generally struggles with confidence or self esteem, but he does struggle with guilt. during that fight with gyutaro when he’s saying that tengen must’ve been special the day he was born, a chosen talent, tengen all but laughs in his face and denies that he has any talent -- it’s a load of crap when just how many lives have slipped through his fingers?? too many. he isn’t like kyojuro who protected an entire train of people and didn’t allow a single person to die, even if it was at the cost of his own life. 

     and the thing is, tengen is crazy strong and obviously does have talent since he has incredibly good hearing, but based on his background and opinion, he likely didn’t have a natural talent with combat. the training his father put him through molded him into the warrior he is, made him capable of becoming a pillar. he wasn’t like muichiro or even kyojuro who taught himself flame breathing. tengen wasn’t born extraordinary. he was made extraordinary through blood and sweat and tears and loss.

     but his lack of natural talent is nothing to be ashamed of! it’s the fact that he’s let so many people die and likely killed people as well. it’s the fact that his wives nearly died because of him. it’s the fact that his siblings are dead while he’s still alive. 

     in the anime, we get an extra scene between tengen and his wives in which they go to the uzui family grave to visit his brothers. there’s a moment where tengen slips and says, “ i’m going to hell,” and then proceeds to brush it off lightheartedly bc he doesn’t want another “ tongue-lashing ” from his wives. but he then thinks to himself, “ i’m going to live the flashiest life possible for my siblings’ sake. ” 

     first!!! the fact that he specifically says he doesn’t need another tongue-lashing from his wives implies he’s said this kind of thing before, and i love that little detail bc that means hina, suma, and makio are all three aware of tengen’s struggle and wholeheartedly believe he shouldn’t feel guilty. and the fact that they think he shouldn’t feel guilty plus the fact that he wants to live a “ flashy ” life for his siblings’ sake means that he 100% feels responsible for his siblings’ deaths. in the second official fanbook, we find out that tengen’s father tricked him and his siblings into fighting each other to the death by masking them, and as a result, tengen killed two of his brothers. it’s no wonder that he believes he’s going to hell despite having been tricked.

     i do wonder if it also has to do with his own feelings towards the shinobi way of life. they were expected to risk their lives for the mission, but that isn’t what tengen wanted from the start, i’m sure. how could he when he lost some of his siblings before they were even ten years old? or when he saw how his father treated his family? how could he when he married hina, makio, and suma, and suddenly had people who he felt responsible for, who he wanted to protect? he didn’t want to die for something like duty to a lifestyle he hated -- he wanted to live. he wanted to live beside his family, beside his wives, and he wanted them to live, too. and i wonder if that didn’t lead to deaths he could’ve prevented. you hesitate when you’re afraid of dying, after all.

     plus!! tengen says, “ those who have baggage like conflict or quandaries are spineless fools. that’s always been the story of my life, ” so his desire to survive has been a struggle for him even while he was a shinobi. but then oyakata-sama tells him thank you for fighting despite those conflicts and quandaries and validates that desire. it isn’t something to be ashamed of, and he doesn’t have to fight with the intention of laying down his life if need be. i’m sure he thought oyakata-sama would expect that of him, which is why he looks absolutely surprised by his response.

     HOWEVER, that doesn’t negate the guilt tengen feels for the people he’s lost as a result of his “ quandaries. ” he’s grown, and now he doesn’t hesitate bc he fights with the intention of winning so long as it isn’t at the expense of his or his wives’ lives. he’s got better judgement bc he has clear intentions without the weight of another’s expectations on him. but he’ll never forget his siblings and the others he’s lost because he wasn’t willing to die for them.

[exlimix1a]

AUUUUUGH IM SUCH A SLOW BURN FAN

[ekleipsi]

❛ i like being close to you. you’re warm. ❜ // ( hermes&lyc hoho hehe )

--- Upon centuries past had the once-man come to know life as a beast; upon all fours had he scoured the earth and witnessed so many of its beautiful offerings in the time since his mortality. Even when full moon was presented, and Lycan form taken to wash the villages with blood and chaos, with curses of infection, had he simply attempted to accept as much. Each passing year was one of atonement, one he could learn from and try and be better for.

--- If asked, he would have happily responded that he didn't regret having attempted to deceive Zeus. Such was not the pain he harbored in chest, but instead was the misery and calamity he'd brought upon his family and all those thereafter that he'd come close to, come to care for. Perhaps a hunter to take them? Perhaps an inability to accept the shift? Sometimes, it was little more than a loss of control on the werewolf's part.

--- No matter the reasoning, it had left him filled to the brim with pain and while that pain wracked at muscled frame, it stole his coherent ability for words. For efficient thought- and even when he had a clear mind, how could he even begin to put to words the things his heart was telling him? The way it hammered and thrummed, pounding against cage like its own separate entity, raging to get out. Slate gaze lingers upon God of Commerce, and such he was, coming in and out of lives.

--- Not Lycaon's, though. Hermes was a constant for the old wolf, from start...to surly finish, he was sure. Despite the comfort that came with such a thought, he still couldn't find it in him to properly formulate the many things he wanted to say, the feelings he wanted to share, the gratitude he wanted to express; when they overwhelmed him like so, it was easier to exist as a beast. Beasts were simple and hungered only for survival.

--- Tail flicked, swishing back and forth for a moment as over-large wolf pads around the small God, already sitting in the grass; former King instead opts to settle just behind him, flopping upon stomach and curling his burly and furry frame around slender figure. A means of comfort, and being close to him, of keeping him warm when the sun begins to set and they're still...sitting there, enjoying the silence, and the company. Eventually he presses his nose beneath the others elbow, a whine and a chuff escaping, as if to express that Hermes can lay back into him, if he so desired.

--- The offered words that ensued...well, he was glad his expression was unreadable like this, though pupils dilated in thought before he curled tighter around companion and patron, to keep him warm as mentioned. He offered no words, save a short bark in response, before a rumble of a growl builds and settles as he nuzzles into the others side. Hues drift closed after a moment, content to fall asleep like this- to keep his patron warm, like this. This...felt as close as he could be to his company, without hurting him, after all.

[elfcollector]

i wanna replay code vein.....

[xaallo]

[nobodyexpectsthe]

actually this cover of hey brother is pirith & his brothers.

[retquits]

save me winter elliott stardew valley... winter elliott stardew valley save me......

[concealed-ashes]

the sisyphean task of melting materials