#claire elizabeth beauchamp randall fraser

[i-look-like-my-mother]

Jamie's Sassenach is our version of dork/weirdo

[saltybenchday]

[sassenach77yle]

||COUNTDOWN ||SEASON 6 EPISODE 07 || STICKS AND STONES||

#83daysofoutlander☆

Funny. We never say that we're "only human"

when we've done something good or worthy of praise.

Instead, it's what we tell ourselves to excuse our mistakes.

An effort, perhaps, to convince ourselves that the person we see looking back at us in the mirror really isn't so bad.

But who was I now?

What was I now?

Claire Elizabeth Beauchamp.

Dr. Randall. Mistress Fraser.

Wife. Mother. Grandmother.

Witch. m*rder*r.

[sgiandubh]

Claire Elizabeth Beauchamp Randall Fraser (Grey)

I wanted to go to sleep, happy enough with a no drama birthday.

Something was nagging me in this very carefully worded donation statement:

Why Claire Beauchamp?

Why not Claire Fraser, which would have been the logical - hell, obvious! - choice?

So I was tossing & turning and instead of counting sheep, I was entertaining the earworm... "Beauchamp.... Beauchamp... Beauchamp"...

And then...

... BUT OF COURSE!

Remember this?

The mythical Hyde Park Walk, when ...uhm... things were said. Following which, a decision to have each other's back was made & set in stone.

I don't think (correct me if I am wrong) we do have the precise day for this pivotal moment in the S&C saga. But we know it was September 2013 and certainly after 9/11/2013, when C was cast as Beauchamp, hehe.

Remember also this?

... followed by this:

Two can play that game, indeed.

Something happened between 9/11/2013 and 9/16/2013. Five days (that shook their world, to paraphrase John Reed's seminal book on the Russian Bolshevik Revolution).

I amused myself a lot with Google Maps, tonight:

It's a ten minutes walk from Hyde Park to Beauchamp Place. Ok, fifteen, at a more leisurely pace.

I would also suggest checking @ashmarie1687's post on this topic (https://ashmarie1687.tumblr.com/post/637622028553289728/where-it-all-began). I am not the only loon who connected these dots.

Tomorrow, I will be crucified for this, for sure. But just tell me: do you have a better explanation for this donation the size of the Spanish Indies, and then some more?

What fan would be so pathologically invested, as to remember these details and act upon them and state them in charming charade form?

Thought so.

Only a person involved in that 'two can play that game' episode would say Beauchamp instead of Fraser, exactly ten years after the facts occured.

A milestone, indeed.

Ok, Sir. Your kilt is showing. :) And this is the sweetest trolling of this entire fandom to date.

I rest my case.

[edit]: Thanks to Mushka's tantrum on X, I am now aware that OTP is One Tree Planted, the NGO chosen by S for the yearly MPC's big charity project in 2022. That good man spent his birthday planting trees on behalf of OTP with Peakers, by the way (https://onetreeplanted.org/blogs/stories/my-peak-challenge):

[lara-frasers]

10 First Lines

Rules: Share the first line of your last ten published works or as many as you are able and see if there are any patterns!

I only have 5 so far, and I'm currently posting one of them. Thanks @adsosfraser for the tag ❤

Here are my jamieclaire fics:

Faith finds us: On a quiet street in Glasgow, there was a bookstore, bearing a detailed sign on the front, carved in wood, reading “Fraser & Sons.”

A fight for love and glory: On May 10th the Germans attacked Paris.

For Auld Lang Syne (one shot): Claire had been working at a hospital in Edinburgh during the pandemic, thanks to that job she had met Jamie.

Serendipity: Claire Elizabeth Beauchamp, doctor, 30 years old, engaged to Frank Randall. Not for long though, she’s had enough.

In the meadow we can build a cabin (one shot): Lately I had grown frustrated because we had been getting interrupted more often than not and never seemed to have a quiet moment for ourselves. 

feel free to share your beautiful writing with the world 💕 @forgetmenotsassenach17 @frasers-of-my-heart @flyinghome-againstthewind

[underthewingsofthblackeagle]

The Countdown to Happiness starts today ...

Picture: Panorama Helsinki / Finland - Dom und Parlamentsplatz (by   tap5a)

From today on, I will post 1 chapter of

"We only do this for Fergus!"

[From @outlanderpromptexchange - Prompt 3: Fake Relationship AU: Jamie Fraser wants to formally adopt his foster son Fergus, but his application will probably not be approved… unless he is married and/or in a committed relationship. Enter one Claire Elizabeth Beauchamp (Randall?) to this story]

until it's "Happy End" - yes, you might not believe it but there is a Happy End coming around New Year's Eve / New Year :) I hope you enjoy reading this little story (again).

[ttpdmusesandfandomspage]

THIS IS A MUSE PAGE FOR MY MULTI-FANDOM, MULTI-MUSE SIDEBLOG TCORTUREDPOETSDEPARTMENT!

. (All follows will be from somethingbcrrowed)

. HOTD & ASOIAF . THE MCU . OUTLANDER . SUPERNATURAL . . HOBBIT & LOTR . UMBRELLA ACADEMY . FANTASY & SCIFI . OTHER .

Below the cut is a Master Post of all of the Muses that are available on this blog, for mobile users who can't access the individual pages that the information is listed on. If it seems too overwhelming just inbox me and ask about your fandom or muse and we'll go from there.

THE MUSES:

PRIMARY = High Activity SECONDARY = Medium Activity TERTIARY = Low Activity EXCLUSIVE = ONLY WRITTEN WITH ONE PARTNER AT A TIME

House Of The Dragon/Fire And Blood: Daemon I Targaryen - primary Rhaenyra Targaryen - primary Aegon II Targaryen - primary Viserys I Targaryen - primary Otto Hightower/Kingshand - secondary Helaena Targaryen - secondary Aemond I Targaryen - secondary Rhaenys Targaryen/Velaryon - secondary Aemma Arryn/Targaryen - exclusive Alicent Hightower/Targaryen - exclusive

A Game Of Thrones/A Song Of Ice And Fire: Cersei Lannister/Baratheon - primary Joffrey Baratheon - primary Ramsay Snow/Lord Ramsay Bolton - primary Jon Snow/Lord Jon Stark - primary Viserys III Targaryen - primary Rhaegar I Targaryen - primary Tyrion Lannister - secondary Arya Stark - secondary Sansa Stark - secondary Daenerys I Targaryen - secondary Brienne of Tarth - tertiary

Outlander (Cross Stitch): Claire Elizabeth Beauchamp/Randall/Fraser - primary (Sir) Jonathan “Black Jack” Randall - primary Lord John William Grey - primary Franklin ‘Frank’ Wolverton Randall - secondary Marsali Jane MackKimmie/Fraser - secondary Brianna Ellen Randall/Fraser/MacKenzie - secondary James Alexander Malcolm MacKenzie Fraser - exclusive Janet ‘Jenny’ Flora Arabella Fraser/Murray - tertiary

Supernatural: Dean Winchester - primary Castiel (Jimmy Novak) - primary Mary Campbell/Winchester - primary Robert “Bobby” Singer - primary Jonathan “John” Winchester - secondary Samuel Winchester - secondary Fergus “Crowley” MacLeod - secondary Rowena MacLeod - secondary Jack Kline - tertiary Lucifer (Nick Hileman) - tertiary

The Umbrella Academy: Allison Hargreeves(number three/rumor) - primary Viktor Hargreeves(number seven/white violin) - secondary Luther Hargreeves(number one/spaceboy) - tertiary Five Hargreeves(number five/the boy) - tertiary Sir Reginald Hargreeves (The Monacle) - exclusive

The Marvel Cinematic Universe (The MCU): Loki Laufeyson - primary Odin Borson - primary Agent Margaret ‘Peggy’ Carter - primary Doctor Jane Foster - primary Wanda Maximoff (The Scarlet Witch)- secondary James ‘Bucky’ Barnes (The Winter Soldier) - secondary Doctor Jemma Anne Simmons - tertiary The Vision (Victor Shade/Victor Stone) - tertiary Anthony “Tony” Stark (Iron Man) - exclusive

The Hobbit & The Lord Of The Rings (Books And Movies): Arwen Undomiel - primary Galadriel the Lady of The Golden Wood - primary Olórin/Gandalf the Grey/Gandalf the White - primary Samwise Gamgee - secondary Nienna the Lady of Mercy - secondary Celebrían the Lady of Rivendell -secondary

Charmed: Piper Halliwell - primary Leonardo “Leo” Wyatt - primary Cole Turner/Belthazor - primary Paige Matthews - secondary Prue Halliwell - secondary Chris Halliwell - tertiary

The V.ampire Ch.ronicles: Lestat de Lioncourt - primary Louis de Pointe du Lac - primary Akasha - primary Claudia de Pointe du Lac - secondary Maharet - secondary Marius de Romanus - secondary

The Twilight Saga: Edward Anthony Masen Jr./Cullen - primary Isabella “Bella” Marie Swan/Cullen - primary Jasper Whitlock/Hale/Cullen - primary Jacob Black - secondary Mary Alice Brandon/Cullen - secondary

Buffy The Vampire Slayer (TV Series)/Angel (TV Series): Drusilla “Dru” Livingston - primary Liam O'Clery/Angelus/Angel - primary William Pratt/“Spike” - secondary Rupert Giles (the watcher) - secondary Tara Maclay - tertiary Willow Rosenberg - tertiary Buffy Anne Summers - tertiary Dawn Summers - exclusive

The Mummy: Evelyn “Evie” Carnahan/O'Connell - primary Richard “Rick” O’Connell - secondary Alexander “Alex” O'Connell - exclusive Anck-Su-Namun/Ankhesenamun - tertiary

Pirates Of The Caribbean: (Captain) Elizabeth Lianna Swann/Turner - primary Tia Dalma/Calypso - primary (Captain) Jackson William Teague/Sparrow - primary (Admiral) James Norrington - primary (Captain) David MacKenzie Jones - secondary (Captain) Edward John Teague - secondary Carina Smyth/Barbossa - secondary Henry William Turner - secondary (Captain) Hector Barbossa - secondary

His Dark Materials: Lyra Belacqua/Lyra Silvertongue - primary Marisa Delamare/Coulter - secondary Pantalaimon - exclusive (for Lyra writers only unless plotted otherwise)

Titanic: Rose Elizabeth Louisa DeWitt Bukater - primary Jack Dawson - primary Margaret “Molly” Brown - secondary

Those About To Die: Quintas/Tenax - primary Domitian Flavianus - primary Cala - secondary

Red Dragon/The Silence Of The Lambs/Hannibal (Books and Movies ONLY): Agent Clarice Michaela Starling - primary Doctor Hannibal Lecter - secondary

Grey's Anatomy:

Criminal Minds:

Law & Order (SVU):

How To Get Away With Murder:

Friends:

Gossip Girl:

Skins:

Sex Education:

Glee:

[legends-of-time]

The Strength of a High and Noble Hill (Outlander Story) Timeline - Fraser Descendants

A/N: Is this needed? Maybe, maybe not but I find this kind of thing satisfying to look at.

Spoilers!!!!

Masterlist

Up to 1770

Brian Robert David Fraser (b. 1691 - d. October 1740) m. Ellen Catriona Sileas Mackenzie (b. 1695 - d. 1729) on 1716

Their children:

William Simon Murtagh Mackenzie Fraser (b. 1716 - d. 1727)

Janet (Jenny) Flora Arabella Mackenzie Fraser (b. 1719 - ) m. Ian Alastair Robert MacLeod Murray (b. May 1720 - ) on 1740

(1) James (Young Jamie) Alexander Gordon Fraser Murray (b. 1741 - ) m. Joan

Henry Murray (b. before 1766 - )

Matthew Murray (b. before 1766 - )

Caroline Murray (b. before 1766 - )

Benjamin Murray (b. 1766 - )

(2) Margaret (Maggie) Ellen Fraser Murray (b. November 1743 - ) m. Paul Lyle

Angus Walter Edwin Murray Lyle (b. before 1766 - )

Unnamed child (b. before 1766 - )

Anthony Brian Montgomery Lyle (b. between 1767 to 1770 - )

(3) Katherine (Kitty) Mary Fraser Murray (b. February 1745 - )  m. George (Geordie) Silvers

Josephine Silvers (b. before 1766 - )

Abigail Silvers (b. before 1766 - )

(4) Michael Fraser Murray (b. 1748 - ) m. Lilliane (Lillie)

Unborn child (1766/67)

(5) Janet Fraser Murray (b. 1748 - )

(6) Caitlin Fraser Murray (b&d. December 1749)

(7) Ian (Young Ian) James Fitzgibbons Fraser Murray (b. 15 November 1752 - )

James (Jamie) Alexander Malcolm Mackenzie Fraser (b. 1 May 1721 - ) m1. Claire Elizabeth Beauchamp (b. 20 October 1918 - ) on November 1743; m2. Laoghaire MacKenzie MacKimmie (b. 1726 - ) on 1765 to ann. 1766

(1) Fergus Claudel Fraser (b. 1735 - ) m. Marsali Jane MacKimmie (b. 1751 - ) on Spring 1767

Germain Alexander Claudel Mackenzie Fraser (b. December 1767 - )

Joan Laoghaire Claire Fraser (b. September 1770 - )

(2) Brian Ian Randall Fraser (b. 12 May 1744 / 1946  - )

(3) Ellen Julia Randall Fraser (b. 23 November 1948 / 1746 - ) m. Roger Jeremiah Wakefield MacKenzie (b. 1941 - ) on October 1770

Jeremiah (Jem or Jemmy) Alexander Ian Fraser MacKenzie (b. May 1770 - )

(4) William (Willie) Clarence Henry George Ransom (illegitimate son by Geneva Dunsany Ransom (b. 1739 - d. 9 January 1758)); (b. 9 January 1758 - )

Robert Brian Gordon Mackenzie Fraser (b&d. 1729)

[always-outlander]

Claire x Jamie / heart eyes

[newhopebucky]

the sexual tension in this scene is just ,,, chefs kiss

[sassenach77yle]

Happy 105th Birthday to a lady of grace, a woman of strength and an astonishing beauty. Claire Elizabeth Beauchamp. Dr. Randall. Mistress Fraser. Wife. Mother. Grandmother.🌸

[sgiandubh]

Through the rabbit hole

Long, lazy Sunday: I am late with the Persian analysis and I apologize to those who were waiting for it. However, I do have an excellent excuse: I found myself unexpectedly engrossed in - hallelujah! can I say hallelujah? - Drums of Autumn, once I finally managed to be done with the very laborious first two chapters.

I continue to find the modern timeline slightly better written than most of the French shenanigans, for reasons I have already explained (yes, it is fiction, but the underuse of that particular trope left me hungry and not in a good way). The 1969 Boston episode (Moon landing included) can easily and will probably be among my favorites: it is short, lively and she does not go overboard with pedantry. Also, to my great surprise (or maybe also because the SS&RR tandem is so cataclysmic in the series), Brianna & Roger are (possibly) way better sketched and, overall, more interesting and endearing in the books. Fun fact: in my mind, they don't even look like the Painful Duo. But J&C look as S&C and whoever tells you otherwise did not watch the series and/or lies.

Unpopular opinion and I will probably get strong reactions to this: book Claire is, at times, insufferable to me. There are (mercifully) fleeting moments when I hear and almost see a poor travesty of Herself in her. If there is one person in this Universe who was ever able to masterfully round those edges and elevate Claire Elizabeth Beauchamp Randall Fraser to legend, well: that is (and I suspect it could only be) C.

Conversely, I once read on a Mordor blog something as idiotically enormous as "Jamie Fraser is, we all know it, a brute and Claire is the only person making him look human". This is Hate 101, transferred from the guy you spew on all day long to the character that guy decisively shaped and gave a destiny to, on screen. Writing such inanities lacks culture, taste and empathy. Jamie Fraser is a brute because he protects his family, whatever the costs? Is he a brute with a deep appreciation for the Greek and Roman Classics? Is he a brute just because he happens to be imagined and given life to in the 18th century Scottish Highlands, a place and time you obviously have no familiarity with, spare these books? And what about the other feminine influences in Jamie's life, that shape his unique sensitivity and understanding of the emotional needs of a 20th century woman, such as Claire? What about Ellen, Jenny, hey even the tiny (blink and you'll miss her) Annalise (dreadful name, Herself) de Marillac? I really pity you, woman. Really do.

All in all, I have no idea about what happened in LAX, other than the kilt apotheosis and the subsequent drooling, fainting and yelling that accompanied it. I still saw many young women in that crowd and I am cautiously betting for less drama, this time. But I do wonder why *urv never shows up at any event in the area, when the effort would be, for her, minimal. Things that make you go hmmm, once again.

A new (hectic) week just started. Onwards.

[thegirlwiththecoffintattoo]

O U T L A N D E R

— Diana Gabaldon

[underthewingsofthblackeagle]

Foto: Panorama Helsinki / Finland - Dom und Parlamentsplatz (by   tap5a)

“We  only do this for Fergus!”  is a short Outlander Fan Fiction story and  my contribution to the  Outlander Prompt Exchange (Prompt 3: Fake  Relationship AU: Jamie Fraser  wants to formally adopt his foster son  Fergus, but his application will  probably not be approved… unless he is  married and/or in a committed  relationship. Enter one Claire Elizabeth  Beauchamp (Randall?) to this  story) @outlanderpromptexchange  

Chapter 26: The Second Christmas Day (1) - At the French Cathedral

Winter night Berlin by  Nathan Wright from Pixabay

Berlin, Grunewald district, villa of the von Klarenberg family, Friday, 26 December 2025, Boxing Day, 4.17 a.m.

         Matthieu von Klarenberg stretched extensively but carefully. Then he looked at the clock face of the alarm clock on his bedside table. The clock showed 04.17 am. Teresa always tried hard not to wake him when she got up at night for some reason, yet he woke up every time. Matthieu was simply too light a sleeper.          It had been very different in his youth. Especially during the time he had spent as a student at various European universities. "You can carry von Klarenberg away at night and he won't notice," his fellow students had often quipped. At the time, he slept like the proverbial marmot- But since he met Teresa, and especially after they got married, his sleeping patterns had changed elementarily. The reason for this was not only that his wife knew countless ways and means to keep him awake at night. After all, a bed wasn't just for sleeping, as she always remarked mischievously. Matthieu had always had this strong protective instinct when it came to people he loved or was responsible for. It was an integral part of his personality. But since he and Teresa had married, this pre-existing protective instinct had intensified and since the children had been born, there were no limits for Matthieu. There was nothing he wouldn't do to protect his family. If it became necessary, he would kill for them. He knew that. But von Klarenberg hoped that this case would never come to pass.

         Matthieu's thoughts wandered to James Fraser. Jamie, whom he and Teresa were to meet in a few hours and who he had known since childhood, was his best friend. Although the two men had very different personalities and it could sometimes appear to outsiders that they came from different worlds, there were many areas of life where they had not only found common ground but also worked very well together. What primarily united them was their sense of loyalty. Both von Klarenberg and Fraser possessed an extraordinary loyalty to the people they cared about. Once they had established a genuine relationship with someone, they did everything they could to protect and support that person. Von Klarenberg's introverted nature, had initially made him keep his distance from Fraser when they had met. Jamie was so very different, crossing boundaries set by the adults and having a blast doing it. Matthieu remembered very well how once during the summer holidays, when they were 16 or 17, Jamie had soaked the feed of the chickens on a neighbouring farm with grain schnapps. A short time later, they were staggering drunkenly around the farm. The story had not only caused a stir among the entire Fraser neighbourhood, but also some excitement within the Fraser household. The fact that Jamie constantly insisted that he had only given the chickens "grain" did not help to dispel this excitement. Matthieu had only been able to convince his father with great difficulty that he was not involved in this prank. Why should he have taken part in something that was so completely illogical, even pointless, and that would also have serious consequences? After all, Jamie had been under  house arrest for a whole month. No, Matthieu was different. He spent his free time in the summer wandering through the fields and forests of the surrounding area to find a quiet place and then read for hours in one of his books. In winter, he made himself comfortable by the tiled stove in his room, got himself a warm drink and ... read. Jamie Fraser, on the other hand ... well.

         Nevertheless, the two young men became friends over time, and not only because their parents had wished it. This shared value of loyalty laid the foundation for a strong partnership between them early on. It was also this shared approach to life that led to the protection of the people they loved becoming their primary concern. Both men were willing to do anything to protect their loved ones from harm. They would face all challenges and dangers to protect their families and friends. They had already proven this a few times. The common desire to protect others had not only strengthened the bond of their friendship but made it unbreakable over the decades. For what they were willing to do for their families, they were also willing to do for each other.          Both men also had a strong sense of justice. Like Jamie, Matthieu had a strong sense of justice and a desire to right wrongs. As a result, both were willing to stand up for what they believed was right, even if it meant encountering opposition or putting themselves in danger. The conviction that truth and truthfulness were among the most important values of all had also moved them time and again to stand up for causes and goals that were important to both of them or even just one of them.          Matthieu and Jamie might be very different in many ways. While Matthieu was a reserved and controlled person who was not always forthcoming with his feelings or intentions, Jamie had a passionate and direct personality. Fraser often wore his heart on his sleeve. But their shared values, principles and beliefs made it easy for them to work together effectively. The two men drew the special strength of their friendship from the fact that they were able to complement each other through their respective strengths. All this was only possible because they had already found a way to communicate effectively with each other in their youth.

         But since his last visit to Potsdam, Matthieu wondered if the latter was still the case. He had enjoyed meeting the friend again and the time with him, Fergus and Claire had been wonderful. But still, he had felt that something was wrong.          "Jamie?"          Teresa had laid back in bed, turned to Matthieu and then rested her head on her right hand.           "Yes."          Matthieu looked at her, thinking how grateful he was that his wife understood him so well. Before he could say anything, she had wrapped her left arm around his neck and pulled him down to her. As they broke away from each other after a lingering kiss, she said:           "Maybe you can talk to him today?"           "Yes, I hope so."           "I will try to spend some time alone with Claire, then you will have a chance to talk to Jamie."           Matthieu nodded.           "Thank you. Is everything all right with Friederike?"           "Yes, just the usual little hunger pangs in between. Everything's fine.           Maurice is fast asleep too. I stopped by to see him on the way back."           "Then we should get some sleep now too, the day will be long."           Matthieu pulled his wife to him, kissed her again and then pulled the covers over her.

New Palace Potsdam on a Winter Morning by  Bernd Schmidt from Pixabay

Potsdam, Nördliche Vorstadt, Villa of the Fraser family, Friday, 26 December 2025, Boxing Day, 7.30 a.m.

         The day began as planned. When Jamie wanted to wake Fergus, he was already sitting awake in his bed, listening to his new CD "The Three ??? and the missing Dinosaur" for the umpteenth time. It didn't take much convincing to get the boy out of bed, because Fergus was very excited about all the things this day would bring and eager to finally meet his friend Maurice.           "Are we bringing Maurice a present? And do you think I'll get a present from Uncle Matthieu and Aunt Teresa, Dad?"          "Good morning to you too, Fergus. Did our Sir Knight sleep well?"          The boy sighed.           "Sorry. Good morning, Papa."           "Come here."           Fraser pulled the child close and gave him a warm hug.           "I understand you have a lot of questions, Fergus. But the sooner we finish showering and dressing now, the sooner you'll get closer to the answers to your questions."           When they emerged from the bathroom, Jamie helped Fergus blow-dry his hair and then, put on the clothes Claire had laid out the night before: Dark blue socks, dark blue trousers, a white shirt with a small blue bow tie and a blue velvet jumper that had the words "Finnjet" in white letters on the right side. When they came down to the dining room for breakfast, everything was already prepared there, but that morning there was only a "light version" of the opulent breakfast they had enjoyed the day before. Jamie and Fergus greeted Claire and then they were seated at the breakfast table.           After the meal, "the men" helped her clear the table and then Fraser accompanied the boy upstairs again so they could both brush their teeth. Ten minutes later they all met back in the hall, put on their coats and boots and headed down to the garage. Claire and Fergus took a seat in the back of the car. A few minutes later they had already left the Heiligensee behind them. It took about ten more minutes before they reached the Potsdam-Babelsberg motorway junction. Although the temperatures had changed slightly back into the plus range that morning, the sky was cloudy and shortly before they had left the house it had started to snow. Jamie was grateful that they had got out of the house so early. He could now drive slower than he had thought and in all probability they would still reach their destination on time.          They had been on the road for maybe fifteen minutes when Claire had pulled Fergus close to her. The boy had leaned against her as soon as he got in. But then she had noticed that he was getting tired. She gently pulled him towards her so that his head came to rest on her lap.          "You're welcome to sleep a little longer, Fergus. The day will still be long." The boy answered nothing but simply snuggled up to her. Claire spread his coat over him. Then she looked ahead and at that moment Fraser's eyes and hers met in the rearview mirror. They smiled.          Half an hour later Fergus woke up again.          "Well, slept well?"          "Hmmm."          The boy yawned, but this time he didn't forget to put his hand over his mouth.           "Are you hungry? I have another roll with salami in my bag for you."           "Nope, thanks, Claire."           He snuggled up to her again.           "Just let me know if you get hungry later."           "Hmmm."          At 9.40 a.m. Jamie steered the car into the underground car park of "Fraser & Son International" and parked. They got out and Claire helped Fergus put on his coat. Then she quickly combed his hair again and put on his fur hat. A moment later, they took the lift down to the company hall. Fraser unlocked the door to the street, let Fergus and Claire out and locked it again behind him.

The French Dome at the Gendarmenmarkt/Berlin by Ansgar Koreng / CC BY 3.0 (DE), CC BY 3.0 de, https://commons.wikimedia.org/w/index.php?curid=40394219

         Contrary to Jamie's fears, he didn't have to urge Fergus to hurry. For one thing, they had plenty of time, and for another, the boy was too excited that he would finally see his "Uncle Matthieu" and his friend Maurice. This excitement was quite enough to drive him.          Even from a distance, Jamie, Fergus and Claire could see Matthieu and Maurice. Father and son von Klarenberg stood, wrapped in their winter coats, under the large portal that protected the entrance to the cathedral. Fergus wanted to run to greet them, but Fraser held him back.          "Fergus, it's slippery, I don't want you to slip and fall. Be careful. We'll be right there!"          Shortly afterwards Claire, Jamie and Fergus also climbed the steps of the cathedral portal and before Maurice could help himself he was also being hugged and squeezed by Fergus.          "Great that we get to visit you today!"           The boy left his friend a little astonished and immediately turned to his "Uncle Matthieu" who had already leaned down to hug Fergus. When the two broke away from each other again, Jamie and Claire also had the opportunity to greet Matthieu and Maurice.          Then the bells of the cathedral began to ring. Jamie glanced at his wristwatch. It showed 9.55 a.m. It was time to take their seats in the church. Before they entered the church, Matthieu took off his feodora. Maurice also pulled his cap off his head. Fraser almost forgot to take off his fur hat. He quickly hurried to do the same to Matthieu. Then, with an extended hand movement, he pulled the cap off Fergus' head as well. He looked questioningly at his father, but he only pointed forward. Claire, who was unfamiliar with the customs, now wanted to take off her cap too, but Fraser told her to keep it on.          They quickly found a row with enough seats for all five of them. Claire led the way. She placed Fergus between her and Jamie. Maurice followed, so that he came to sit between Jamie and Matthieu. Good, Claire thought, the boys can be close but not get into mischief, because the fathers sit between them. She had to smile.          Now the first  accords of an organ piece were heard and the service began. Following the piece of music, the pastor welcomed those present. A silent prayer followed, during which Fergus unobtrusively tried to get a closer look at the church interior. The pastor ended the silent prayer with "Amen" and announced a hymn. Matthieu pointed to the hymnals laid out and opened his at the song number indicated. Jamie and Claire followed suit. Then those present rose to sing. Claire read the words to the song and tried to follow them. She regretted not asking Jamie about the schedule or details of the service in the days before. But when she looked over at him, she realised that he was as clueless as she was. For he too did not sing, but followed the words of the hymn reading as well. Fergus, she observed, seemed more preoccupied with scrutinising all the details of the church hall than singing. Unlike her, Jamie and Fergus, neither Matthieu nor Maurice seemed to have any problems with the song. She clearly heard Matthieu's clear baritone voice and, albeit softly, Maurice's squeaky singing voice.          When the song had faded away, a presbyter stepped in front of the altar. After a moment of silence, he read the 10 Commandments and their summary by Jesus Christ. Then he said a prayer, which was followed by another song. After the congregation was seated again, the pastor stepped up to the pulpits and began to speak. First he read the sermon text, which for this Sunday was taken from the 3rd chapter of the letter to Titus:          “At one time we too were foolish, disobedient, deceived and enslaved by all kinds of passions and pleasures. We lived in malice and envy, being hated and hating one another. But when the kindness and love of God our Saviour appeared, he saved us, not because of righteous things we had done, but because of his mercy. He saved us through the washing of rebirth and renewal by the Holy Spirit, whom he poured out on us generously through Jesus Christ our Saviour, so that, having been justified by his grace, we might become heirs having the hope of eternal life. This is a trustworthy saying. And I want you to stress these things, so that those who have trusted in God may be careful to devote themselves to doing what is good. These things are excellent and profitable for everyone.” (Titus 3: 3 - 8, NIVUK)          In his remarks, the pastor emphasised the new life made possible for people through the birth, life, death and resurrection of Jesus Christ. Claire looked over at Fraser. She noticed that the minister's words had some effect on him. Following the sermon, there was another hymn. Then there were some announcements. The collection followed, which was again accompanied by an organ piece.          Then, to Jamie's and Claire's surprise, those present rose and once again a presbyter came forward and offered the greeting of peace. Then the pastor said a prayer of thanksgiving and intercession and led into the Lord's Prayer, which was said by the whole congregation. Claire glanced at Fergus and could see that he was clearly watching everything closely and also trying to memorise a lot of things. He will be asking a lot of questions in the coming days, she thought and hoped fervently that Jamie and she would somehow be able to answer them. After the common prayer had ended with a loud "Amen", the pastor extended the invitation to the Holy Meal. The organ began to play a piece of music softly and when Claire saw Jamie and Fergus sit down again, she too took her seat. Matthieu motioned Maurice to sit down too and then whispered something to Jamie. The latter nodded briefly. Matthieu stopped and shortly afterwards joined the queue of people who were now walking step by step towards the table to receive the Holy Meal.

Inside view of the French Dome, Berlin,  by Andreas Faessler - Own work, CC BY-SA 3.0, https://commons.wikimedia.org/w/index.php?curid=30533293

         Fergus turned in a whisper to Jamie, who had his left arm around Maurice and his right around his foster son:          "What is Uncle Matthieu doing there?"          "I'll explain later," Fraser whispered back.          Claire followed Matthieu with her eyes. The tall man, who measured at least six feet nine inches, even kneeling, still stood out from that group spread out on the three kneeling benches that stood in front of the table.          Only a few minutes later, von Klarenberg returned to his seat, where he stopped again for a moment and prayed silently. Then he too took his seat again.          The pastor announced another hymn shortly afterwards and after it had faded away, the sending and the blessing followed. Then the organ started for the last time and the pastor left the sanctuary towards the church door. Those present rose and slowly followed him to the exit. There, one by one, they were bidden farewell by the clergyman.          When Matthieu and Maurice took their turn, von Klarenberg immediately introduced James Fraser ("my friend"), Fergus Fraser ("his foster son") and Claire Beauchamp ("his fiancée") to the pastor. Jamie froze when he heard the words "his fiancée". Where was Fergus? Had he heard that? How would he react? But then Fraser could breathe a sigh of relief, for he saw that Fergus and Maurice had already arrived at the bottom step of the stairs leading down to the Gendarme Market. Quite obviously, the boys had not noticed anything about the whole thing either. While Matthieu and Claire were still talking to the pastor, Jamie hurried after the boys.           "Stay here, gentlemen!"           The boys looked up at him.           "Come on, we're all going to lunch right now!"           Fifteen minutes later, Claire, Fergus and Jamie were back in Fraser's car and driving to the von Klarenbergs' house.

A villa at Berlin-Grundewald by Bodo Kubrak - Own work, CC0, https://commons.wikimedia.org/w/index.php?curid=19272619           "Why wasn't I allowed to go with Maurice and Uncle Matthieu?" asked Fergus, who was clearly annoyed that Jamie and Matthieu had separated the two friends again for the return journey.           "Fergus, that makes sense," Fraser replied and then added, "because we need your help!"           "Why?" the boy now asked curiously.           "Why? Well, it's quite obvious! There are all the presents in the back of the boot. For Aunt Teresa, for Maurice and for Uncle Matthieu. You'll have to help me and Claire carry them."           "Ah," was all Fergus said, then fell silent. He's probably pondering what we'll bring to the von Klarenbergs, Claire thought. Then she glanced ahead and saw Fraser smiling at her again through the rear-view mirror. She smiled back.          When they arrived shortly afterwards in front of the von Klarenbergs' house in the Grunewald district of Berlin, the tall wrought-iron courtyard gate opened immediately so that Jamie drove through and stopped directly in front of the house entrance. Claire was amazed when she saw the property. Fraser House was an imposing mansion, and yet it was nothing like this city mansion.          The von Klarenbergs' mansion was two storeys high and had a roof truss that had obviously been extended as well. The house was kept in a light, cream-coloured shade that went well with the red roof tiles. A two-storey extension had been added to the left of the almost square main house, probably at a later date. This was smaller than the main house, but still larger than the annexe that adjoined Fraser's villa and in which the Curtius couple lived. When Claire got out of the car, she immediately noticed the surveillance cameras mounted under the roof. They were coloured in the same tone as the house and were guaranteed not to be noticed by an observer who was not standing directly in front of the house. Only if you stood close to the house and looked up could you see them.          As the small group got out of the car, the front door opened and Matthieu von Klarenberg came down the steps of a staircase leading into the house. Once again Matthieu greeted each of the visitors warmly. Then he led Claire into the house while Jamie held Fergus back:          "We're going to move the car into the car park," he said, addressing his foster son, "and then I'll need your help carrying the presents."          Fergus nodded, got back into the car and waited. Fraser got in too and then drove the car a few yards away to a spot where two other cars were already parked. When Jamie had parked the car, he got out, opened the door for Fergus and then took some bags and a large bouquet of flowers wrapped in cling film from the boot.          "What do you want me to carry?" asked Fergus.          "You take the bouquet, I'll carry the bags. They're too heavy for you,"  Fraser replied. Then they followed Matthieu and Claire into the house.

[bee-kathony]

“Heartbeat” - Claire E.B.R. Fraser One Shot 

There were three times in Claire’s life after she left Jamie to his destiny on Culloden Moor that she thought her heart might one day beat again. Three times that she felt like she had something to give and something to take if only to remind herself to live.

Claire’s heart had been ripped out of her chest the moment she passed through the stones, leaving Jamie behind in 1746. It nearly killed her when she realized just when and where she was. He was dead. And there was nothing Claire could do now or ever that would change that fact. She had made a promise to him — to return to Frank, her first husband and raise the child she was now carrying, with him.

It was a lie. Their child was raised in a lie. Frank had been extremely happy when she returned — in shock and disbelief that she had come back to him. But she hadn’t come back, at least not fully. Her heart was with Jamie back in 1746 on the battlefield of Culloden. The only thing that Frank ever had was the physical body of Claire — even then, she could not fully give that to him either.

Try her best to forget the past and move forward, every day was a day lived in agony without Jamie. After her return to Frank, they had stayed at the Reverend’s Manse for a few weeks while she recovered from the journey and they sorted everything out in Scotland. Claire couldn’t help but flinch every time Frank tried to touch her. She knew he was seeking comfort from his long lost wife and she hated herself that she wasn’t that woman anymore.

Once, she had loved Frank and dearly. Young and naive, she had married him when she was nineteen and had followed him wherever he led them. Then when they were parted for six years during the war (the majority of their marriage), Claire and Frank naturally grew distant. That’s what led them to Scotland in the first place — a second honeymoon. Only Claire would wander upon standing stones that called out to her and when she touched them, her life would never be the same.

She had explained to Frank time and time again that she was in love with another man and that he was existed in another century. Thinking her insane, Frank struggled to accept her truth. Only when she told him she was pregnant did he come around and choose to believe whatever story she wanted to tell him. Frank wanted a child, no matter the father. Except he made Claire promise to raise the child to believe that he was their father and not Jamie — a tall, red headed warrior from the 18th century.

Agreeing to this, Claire and Frank moved to Boston where he accepted a job as a professor at Harvard. It hadn’t always been easy and at times, Claire felt extremely lonely. Her marriage with Frank was that of convenience and obligation, but not of love — not as it had been and not as it ever had been with Jamie Fraser.

There were three times in Claire’s life after she left Jamie to his destiny on Culloden Moor that she thought her heart might one day beat again. Three times that she felt like she had something to give and something to take if only to remind herself to live.

Frank and Claire tried in the beginning. But no amount of trying on either end would save their marriage. A couple of years after Brianna was born (with flaming red hair), they decided to no longer share one bed. Several times Claire had come to Frank, feeling desperate, aching with desire, but when she made love to him, it wasn’t Frank who she was thinking of. It was always Jamie and with her eyes closed, she could pretend it really was him. Frank was a prideful man, and smart as well — catching on to the fact that she couldn’t and wouldn’t fully be able to give herself to him.

So they continued to raise Brianna as best they could while also managing to live their own separate personal lives. It was when Brianna was seven and brought home her friend Jessica Nelson to play that Claire found out her heart could beat — even just a little.

When Claire and Frank first moved to Boston, they knew no one. But Claire found a quick friend with Millie Nelson and over the next several years; her and her husband Jerry were invited over for many dinners. Claire didn’t have many friends save Millie and Joe Abernathy who was working to become a doctor just like Claire.

Millie wasn’t as daft as she seemed, she knew something wasn’t quite right between Claire and Frank and had asked her as much one day when Millie brought over her daughter Jessica.

“Is everything alright between you and Frank?” Millie took the martini from Claire’s out stretched hand and took a seat on the couch in Claire’s living room.

“Everything’s as fine as it’ll ever be,” Claire smiled, pouring her own drink before joining Millie on the couch. “Why do you ask?”

“I notice these things,” her friend touched her knee lightly. “I only ask now because I can tell you two aren’t the perfect couple you try so hard to show.” Claire started to object, but Millie raised her hand. “It’s also because I see mine and Jerry’s relationship reflected in yours.”

“You two are having problems?”

“Have been for years,” Millie said over the top of her glass. “I found him cheating on me with his secretary, some blonde bimbo. I wanted him out of the house, but he promised to work on our relationship,” Millie rolled her eyes.

Claire was hesitant to reveal too much of what it had actually been like between her and Frank. The arrangement they had come to agree upon worked for them. It was far from ideal, but their circumstances were also extremely rare.

“Frank and I —“ Claire began, shamefully looking down at her lap. “Well we’ve both seen other people. I haven’t in quite some time, but the fact of the matter is that I was married to Frank when it happened.”

“An affair? Oh how juicy!” Millie nodded, urging for Claire to go on.

“Don’t you think I’m a horrible person? You just called your husband’s mistress a blonde bimbo,” Claire smirked.

“When it’s not my life, it’s fascinating,” Millie remarked, biting the olive from the toothpick. “So you slept with another man and Frank cheated as well?”

It hurt to hear the reality out loud, but it was also a relief in some ways to be able to talk about it with someone. “Yes, it was many years ago and just the one man. Frank and I have agreed to have sort of an open relationship.”

“That’s progressive,” Millie’s eyes shot up. “I’m sure Jerry would love that! He’d probably even suggest we invite his secretary to join us in bed.”

Claire finished her drink, tossing her head back and wiping her mouth with the back of her hand. She set down the glass on the coffee table in front of her. “You and Jerry are still together though, so did you work it out?”

“Oh we’re trying, been seeing a counselor for weeks now, but I don’t see it working,” Millie scoffed and set her glass down next to Claire’s. “It’s not like I wanna get divorced, but every time I look at him I see… her, writhing underneath him, Christ it makes my skin boil!”

“We don’t have to talk about it,” Claire said, reaching out to lay her hand over Millie’s. “Let’s talk about something a bit lighter shall we?”

While their girls played upstairs in Brianna’s room, Claire and Millie discussed everything from new recipes to the latest flick in the cinema. Even though it was late afternoon, they both had another round of martinis and relaxed without the presence of screaming children nearby.

Claire had just finished telling Millie about Brianna losing another one of her teeth, it had fallen out when she was trying to eat an apple and gotten stuck. Blood had poured out of Bree’s mouth and soaked the front of her dress. It was a front tooth, but Bree was so excited she had run around the house, holding up her tooth and screaming about the tooth fairy.

“Jessica lost all her baby teeth,” Millie smiled. “Keeps asking when’s the next time money will appear under her pillow!”

“Yes, well Brianna only has a few left now.”

Glancing up at the clock, Claire realized that Frank would be home in about an hour from work. She really should start preparing dinner, but her woozy head and the company of Millie was keeping her parked on the couch.

“Can I ask you something Claire?”

“Of course, I’m an open book,” Claire smiled. Well, she was open about everything except a particular red headed scot, but she was quite certain Millie wouldn’t be asking about that.

“Have you ever—“ her friends cheeks blushed and she shook her head. “Nah, it’s silly.”

“Wot is it, Millie?” Claire laughed, nudging her leg.

“This may come off sounding strange, but I just wondered if you’ve ever kissed another woman,” she rushed it all out, letting out a deep breath in the process. In fact, Claire had never kissed another woman. She knew of girls that did during the war, mostly from loneliness, but Claire had experimented like that herself. It wasn’t exactly talked about either, at least not in public.

“I haven’t,” Claire shook her head. “Have you?”

“Oh God no!” Millie’s hand flew over her heart.

“Why do you ask?” Claire smirked.

“I was just curious what it would be like is all, I thought maybe you had since you certainly aren’t getting any from Frank,” Millie blushed. “Forget I asked,” she waved her hand away.

As she sat there, looking at Millie, she noticed how pink her lips were. How soft her skin looked and how beautiful her friend really was. Claire had never harbored any feelings towards other women and she didn’t think she would suddenly start now, but something compelled her to lean in closer and so she did.

“What are you doing, Claire?” Millie asked as Claire scooted closer towards her. Claire laid her hand on top of her shoulder, her other hand coming up to cup her cheek.

“You said you wanted to know what it was like…” she waited, looking into her friend’s blue eyes, looking for a sign.

“I did,” Millie gulped audibly.

Claire’s heart was racing and it was all she could hear as she closed the small space between her and the other woman. It was odd at first, mostly because she hadn’t actually kissed anyone in a long time, but soon her lips found the way of it again.

Millie was stiff at first, simply sitting there and letting Claire move against her. Sliding her hand down over her arm, Claire squeezed Millie’s hand and then parted her lips, urging her to give in. To give in to whatever was happening between them and forget everything that said it wasn’t right. The feeling of her lips on Claire’s felt right. Even if it was just this one moment that they shared, Claire felt something stir up inside her that she thought long dead. It was that feeling of being wanted. Not that Frank hadn’t wanted her, but Claire was only reminded of what she couldn’t have (Jamie) every time she looked at him.

Soft moans came from both of the women as they relaxed and began to kiss each other. Claire took charge, brushing her fingers back through Millie’s hair. She parted her lips, pressing her tongue against Millie’s and sucked lightly. Shifting slightly on the couch, Claire pressed herself flush against her friend, feeling the softness of her breasts on her own. She knew how irresponsible this was — Bree and Jessica were just upstairs. But she needed this, she needed to know that she was capable of feeling once again.

Millie was breathing hard, her own hands resting lightly on Claire’s back. The women broke apart and looked into each other’s eyes and then started laughing. Claire leaned her forehead against Millie’s and sighed before moving back on the couch.

Wiping at her lips, Claire met Millie’s eyes, her cheeks blushing. “So?”

“If you kiss like that with Frank, I don’t know how he ever let you get away from his bed,” Millie laughed, wiping at her own lips. “I — well I liked it.”

“I did too,” Claire nodded in agreement. “I feel a little bit reckless, don’t you?”

They both laughed again, feeling a pump of adrenaline for doing something they shouldn’t have. It’s not like Frank would care and it’s not like she was ever going to tell him for that matter. A few moment later, before both women could talk about the kiss in more detail, Bree and Jessica came running down the stairs in search of snacks.

“You can have an apple, but nothing more darling. Daddy will be home soon and I need to start dinner.”

Millie rose from the couch then, followed by Claire. “I guess we better get out of your hair then, leave you to your dinner.”

“You’re welcome to stay if you’d like!”

“That’s a kind offer, but I know Jerry’s expecting his roast beef tonight,” Millie smiled and Claire couldn’t help but feel sorry for her. It was 1955 and divorce while not unheard of, it was still not common for a woman to leave her husband. Claire only hoped her friend would be able to work things out between her and her husband.

“Another time then,” Claire smiled and hugged her friend goodbye. “Say ‘thank you’ to Jessica’s mum for letting her come over and play, Bree.”

“Thank you Mrs. Nelson,” Bree smiled politely, waving as Jessica and Millie left.

Frank came home twenty minutes later, oblivious to the way Claire jumped out of her skin at the slam of the front door. They ate dinner together as a family, and Claire was mostly silent, letting Bree tell Frank all about her day.

That night as she feel asleep to the soft snoring of her husband, she pressed her fingers against her lips, desperately trying to recall the feeling of Millie’s lips on hers. For the first time in years, Claire didn’t feel merely like a shell of a human being, but that she had hope that one day she might find love again that really made her heart beat in her chest.

The second time Claire felt a flutter in her heart didn’t happen until many years later. Frank had been seeing a woman named Sandy for years now — all in private of course. Claire found out about her on the day of her graduation from medical school. She knew Frank was discreet, but it was still odd to come face to face with her. But Claire couldn’t hold it over his head because she knew she gave no real effort to their marriage and they had agreed on this — to live together for the sake of Bree, but separately for the sake of their hearts.

His name was Robert Lewis — a fellow doctor that had been flirting with Claire on and off for years. He knew she was married, he saw the ring on her left hand — had even commented on her wearing two bands on either hand. She hadn’t told him about the silver band she wore on her right… that was just for her.

Robert was persistent and he had Claire figured out. At least he thought he did. It was obvious to anyone who looked even a little bit that Frank and Claire didn’t live the perfect marriage. Perhaps that’s why Robert kept pushing her to go out on a date with him. Bree was in her senior year of high school and in the summer she was going on a tour of colleges with Frank. Claire needed to stay behind and tend to her patients and besides, she knew Bree didn’t really want her to go with them.

Claire spent more time at the hospital than she did with Bree and while she often regretted it, she would never regret the lives that she had saved. Medicine was a part of her, something she had always known was in her blood. That was something she had in common with Robert and so one day when he asked her yet again to have a drink with him, she agreed. But she told him to wait a month, because Bree and Frank would be gone. Claire didn’t want to risk her daughter finding out about her mother going on a date with another man. She knew Brianna wasn’t oblivious to the shouting and fighting that went on between her and Frank, but that didn’t mean she needed to learn about the way her parents lived their lives. One day, but that day wasn’t now.

The next month passed quickly and Claire had worked herself up to a nervous wreck. It was her friend, Joe Abernathy that had convinced her to not cancel on Robert.

“Lady J, you have a date tonight with the hottest doctor in this whole damn hospital,” he laughed. “Screw Frank, well… don’t screw Frank, but you get what I mean.”

“Frank doesn’t give a rat’s arse what I do,” Claire sighed, crossing her arms. “It’s just one date anyways. I mostly just said yes so he would stop asking me.”

“Where are you going?”

“A bar downtown,” Claire said as she wrapped her scarf around her neck. She was heading out from work with Robert any minute now. “It’s not like anyone will recognize me, I never leave this place!”

“Have fun, LJ and relax. It’s just drinks and a nice night,” Joe smiled and gave her a pat on the back. “You’re a stunning woman and you might even get lucky tonight.”

“Joe!” Claire swatted at his arm, laughing as she turned to leave their shared office.

As it happened, the night with Robert had been rather successful. They talked about their patients and why they had wanted to study medicine. And as the night moved on, they opened up and he asked her why she had agreed to come on the date with him.

“You want me to be honest?”

“No, I want you to lie,” Robert laughed, taking a sip of his whisky. “Tell me the truth, if you want.”

“Well mostly I agreed because I wanted you to stop asking me,” Claire blushed. “But also I think you’re a nice man and you’ve always been kind to me.”

“I like you, Claire Randall,” Robert lifted his glass to hers. “It’s been my honor to share this evening with you.”

Drinks in a dimly lit bar wasn’t the only thing they shared that night. With no one at home, Claire had invited him inside. She felt reckless, tipsy and a bit aroused at the thought of having sex with him.

Why did doing bad things have to feel so damn good!?

They hadn’t made it far, only to the living room where Robert had unclasped her garters and pulled her dress up around her waist. He was handsy and only a little bit taller than her. But he tasted like whisky and his kisses burned along her neck and chest. As they stumbled to the ground and Robert reached into his pocket for a condom, Claire almost stopped it there. Once he slid it down on his cock, he leaned forward and Claire moaned, shutting her eyes tight at the sensation she hadn’t felt in more than a decade.

She wrapped one leg around his waist, angling her hips as he thrust deep into her. Something she’d locked up inside of her was let loose and she kissed his jaw, biting slightly, eliciting moans from him. Her hands wandered along his back, tugging on his shirt, pushing him into her.

He had been gentle, but also drunk. With four hard thrusts, Claire came with a cry and Robert followed soon after, holding his body weight above her on his arms. He offered to stay the night, and she considered it, but that was all she could handle for one night.

“Thank you, Robert,” Claire kissed his cheek at the door. “I had a good time.”

“It was my pleasure, Claire,” he kissed her hand and then they parted ways.

Nothing ever came out of that one date. A few months later, Robert had met a woman at a grocery store and by the time Christmas rolled around, they were engaged to be married. Claire was determined that love wasn’t in the cards for her. She had had one great love in her life. One man that she loved with all of her heart, all of her soul and she knew she would never find that again.

Claire had managed to keep the ghost of Jamie at bay most nights and days. But a couple years later, after another fight when Frank asked her if she would ever truly move on from Jamie, he had gotten in a car accident and died. She had wept, running to his lifeless body after Frank told her the news. She was already at the hospital and ended up sitting with him for nearly an hour before his body was taken down to the morgue.

“I did love you,” she had whispered and kissed him goodbye one last time.

The third time Claire’s heart started to beat on its own was when after months of searching and with the help of the Reverend’s adopted son and her daughter — they found out Jamie was alive.

At least, he was still alive back in the 18th century. He hadn’t died on Culloden Moor, he had made it out alive and was a printer in Edinburgh. Roger Wakefield had found an old clipping of a pamphlet printed by a man named Alexander Malcolm — two of Jamie’s middle names.

It hadn’t been an easy journey. Brianna was furious with her when she told her the truth that she had kept for twenty long years. Jamie Fraser was her father and not only did she belong to another man, but that man was an 18th century highlander. This revelation had nearly broken Claire and Bree apart, but when the three of them witnessed Gillian Edgars (Who Claire had known as Geillis Duncan) on top of Craig Na Dun disappear into thin air — that’s when Bree believed her.

It took seeing it with her own eyes, for Bree to really believe Claire had been telling the truth. After that, they had spent months looking for signs of Jamie and when they found that clipping, proving that Jamie was alive, Bree had told her mother that she had to go back and find him.

“Bree, have you thought this through? If I go, I may never be able to come back. It’s not like an elevator where you can just jump on and off.”

“You’ve done it before,” Bree squeezed her mother’s hand.

“But there are no guarantees. It’s… possible we may never see each other again, can you live with that?” Claire felt her heart tighten at the thought of leaving her daughter behind. “Cause I don’t know if I can. To not be there, to see you get married, walk you down the aisle. Or to watch you become a mother, hold my first grandchild…”

“I know,” Bree looked down at their joined hands. “It won’t be easy. But I have been trying to figure out if I was more Randall or Fraser and what I realized is that I’m more you than I am either of my father’s and if I can turn out to be half the woman you are, then I’ll be fine.”

Claire lifted her hand, brushing back her daughter’s red hair, “But I’m the one who knows you better than anyone,” Claire sighed, tears filling her eyes.

“You know who doesn’t know me?” Bree said, “Jamie. You owe it to him to go back and I want you go and tell him everything.”

Claire was quiet as she looked at her daughter and then briefly down.

“There’s something else, isn’t there?”

“What if he’s forgotten me or what if he doesn’t love me anymore?” There was still a chance that it wasn’t Jamie that was this Alexander Malcolm or that he had in fact moved on with his life. It’d been nearly twenty years since that day on Craig Na Dun.

“You told me what you felt for Jamie was the most powerful thing you ever felt in your life, has that changed?”

“No,” Claire said quickly.

“Then you have to trust it’s the same for him. You gave Jamie up for me, now I have to give him back to you.” Claire hugged her daughter, holding her close and trying to memorize everything about her.

It was just a few days after Christmas that Claire left. She left her daughter behind with Roger Wakefield, hoping that she would be able to find her own happiness. She left her old life behind and focused on finding Jamie.

With every step she took towards the print shop on Carfax Close, her heart began to beat louder and louder until she could only hear the drumming of her pulse in her ears.

A bell chimed as she opened the door.

A few more steps.

A voice.

“Is that you Geordie? Took ye long enough.”

More steps. Louder heartbeat.

“Where’d ye go to get the ash? To Glasgow?”

A pause.

“It isn’t Geordie, it’s me… Claire.”

He turned around slowly, her highlander and when his eyes met hers for the first time in twenty years, Claire’s heart came back to life and she knew everything would be alright.

[purewhitepages]

Desert Heat Chapter 4

Chapter 3

A/N: I apologize for such a short chapter and so much later than I had promised. The end of the semester is quickly approaching and I had a lot of work to get done after my vacation. Regular uploads should resume this Sunday. I just wanted to get something out as soon as I could. Thank you for your patience. I tried something different with this chapter, let me know if you like it

Interesting information: The year this story takes place (1922) is a significant year in Egyptological history because it was the year King Tut’s tomb was discovered. It was a significant find because the tomb was completely intact, without any robberies. This was the first time it had happened. Some scholars have even considered this event to be the end of the height of Egyptology, though excavations still occur to this day.

From the Journal of Lord John Grey

Late January 1922

Excavations have halted along the South Wall of Site BP2. After the noon-day break, digging yielded a bricked up entrance much like that referred to in QLB Entry 187. The desert mole had been right, gods be good.

The brick was a typical mud of that used in structures at the time. Most likely made of earth materials (clay, dirt, etc.) and straw mixed with water and fired. Though, as outlined in several QLB notes, it is a mystery as to how and why such a structure was built so far from the Nile in the middle of the desert. Theories have ranged from perhaps great monsoons swelling the river beyond the usual delta, putting the river much closer, but there has been little evidence of that.

The entrance gave little trouble opening and it would be of no surprise to this author if, over the millenia, any and all antiquities in the cavern had been looted by raiders.

CEB was the first to enter and reported much what I had expected: no obvious objects or paintings beyond a carving on the opposite wall. I validated this claim and sketched the enclosed (JWG 55) of the carving, verified by CEB as what she also saw. The lettering appears to be Latin rather than the typical Hieratic, Greek, or even Hieroglyph. This would not be so out of the ordinary given our original thought that the structure most likely would have been raided several times over the millenia. But when one takes into consideration how out of the way the hereto unknown Site BP had been until just after the War, what is the likelihood of a Latin alphabet speaker to be here.

This is not even taking into account the theory by JF--

It was only after the scuffling had proved too loud to ignore that John looked up from his journal to notice the current state-of-affairs in his tent. An injured Scotsman, a well-educated Brit, and a Desert Frog stuck in the middle of winding sand dunes. He was beginning to think he didn’t quite like this joke.

“It doesna make any sense,” Mr. Fraser stated, pacing next to  the table where Claire, Fergus, and Miss MacKimmie sat.

“Well, as John said, it could very well be graffiti from a pre-modern age,” Claire stated, ever the pragmatist.

He stopped and looked at her. “Aye, but there is no written record of a Proto-Celtic language from before the Modern Age. And of course this isna takin’ inta account that I can read the damn thing in my own Mother Tongue!” His face was red and his whole body was stiff with frustration and stress.

“Can you please explain to me- to all of us why this matters so much to you?!” Claire demanded back to him, not swayed a step by the Scot’s temper.

He deflated somewhat and he glanced at Miss MacKimmie. The young woman caught his eye and looked at Fergus beside her, seemingly confused why he would look at her thus.

“I- I canna,” Mr. Fraser finally said.

“What do you mean you ‘canna’?” Claire demanded. “You can’t just storm around here scaring us all half to death with your incredulity at a carving and then hold out on us as to why! I won’t allow it.”

He seemed to chew on her words. “If I tell ye what it says, will ye promise not to tell Dougal?”

Claire seemed taken aback by this. “Of course.” She’d never had any intention of telling the Great Scot anything.

“That goes for everyone.” Mr. Fraser eyed everyone in the room as did Claire.

“You all heard him, zip it. You never heard of any carving in our cave.”

They all nodded. John sat forward in his seat as Mr. Fraser ran his good hand through his wild mane of red hair.

“‘Tis part of a larger verse, ye ken? But the part inscribed is ‘I give you my spirit till our life should be done.’”

Claire blinked a few times. “What is it a part of?”

“It’s a wedding vow,” Miss MacKimmie piped up then. “The former part being ‘You are blood of my blood and bone of my bone. I give you my body so that we two may be one.’” She gestured to Mr. Fraser. “And then the rest.”

He nodded.

“Is it common in Scotland?” John asked.

Mr. Fraser nodded.

“That’s what’s got you in such a state?” Claire asked.

“‘Tis not a light vow, lass.” Mr. Fraser looked almost offended at her inability to understand.

“I never implied it wasn’t. But I fail to see why a wedding vow would cause you to be so shocked by its existence.”

“I said I would tell you what it meant, not what it means to me.” Claire was about to protest until his hand came up to stop her. She closed her mouth.

“Please, Miss Beauchamp, give me one day. I promise to explain everything tomorrow. Just give me a night to think on it.”

She looked to John who shrugged. “What else can we do but trust him? We’ve sworn not to let the news leave this tent.” Claire did not look happy, but she did not protest. “Mr. Fraser, you have your day. Pray do not disappoint.”

From the Journal of Quentin Lambert Beauchamp

Entry 187 1920-1921?

The discovery of Site BP has opened up new possibilities I had scarce thought of before. The stone circle at BP1 has many thinking of such sites as Stonehenge and Craig Na Duhn, but anyone who knows me best knows I could care less for faery stories and such poppycock. Leave that for the Frogs to squabble over.

What most interests me is the other side, BP2 and the House, though I know CB thinks me a daft old man for it. Perhaps I am.

From my experience and the notes of Emerson last season, I have a strong belief the entrance will be along the south side rather than the north side as that pompous-- Well, Emerson has decided to try there this season, but I predict he will come up with nothing but sand. All the better for me to snatch it from him next year.

I’ve been thinking long and hard, and I’ve come to a decision. After doing my due work at BP, I have decided to retire. Though I will miss the sands of the stretching wasteland, doubtless it will shift without me. Imagine me, an old coot in a cottage by the sea. And if I can convince CB to come along with us, all the better. Anytime I have left, I would much like to spend it with her.