#cigar cutter

[marcos-roma]

Cigar cutter. Made in Italia.

[geezmagi]

TIL’ WE MEET AGAIN | Young!Silco x Fem!Reader

Series Summary; Silco tells a new story to a curious Jinx.

Warnings; Angst, pre-canon, hurt/comfort, Zaunites, Piltians, revolution, violence, blood, gore, drinking, smoking, gambling, swearing, sex, brothels, drugs, slow burn, the reader is a coward at first, original character (Wynn), strangers to lovers, bittersweet, Old Silco being weirdly sentimental, Jinx being noisy, and major character death.

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Silco's office door closes when Sevika takes her leave, his dual eyes stare indifferently into the wooden entrance.

Briefly resting his face on his hand so he can rub at his cheek bone. He flickers his irritation to the paper in front of him, reading through the documents neatly arranged on his desk. Flipping through it–His lengthy fingers daintaly holding up each page before letting them fall back in place.

Through habit he moves his chair to the left of the desk, opening up the middle drawer, taking out a small compact box, shutting the thing closed and placing the wooden box on the side of the desk, aiming to not dirty the papers. He opens the humidor, four expensive cigars lay neatly inside. Taking one of the sticks and the straight cutters, he fixes the cigar between his fingers and brings the sheers to the front and slides the stick in between the blades, and shuts the guillotine. 

SNAP!

He rolls back and turns the chair to face the large window, so that the green light that pours into the room which not only illuminates the furniture, but the kingpin as well–highlighting his features. His good eye blends with the light, the seafoam green melting away a stark contrast from the damaged one. The green clashes against the bright angry orange, the toxic waters of the Undercity fully displayed on the left of his face, the hard horrors of his youth.

Finally, he slips his hand into his vest. His delicate fingers glided over the finely knitted fabric of his striped burgundy shirt before delving into the soft contours of the breast pocket. With a practiced motion, his digits deftly retrieve a small, rectangular item. Something cold to the touch against his fingertips, the metal texture bumpy and slightly damaged. 

It's a lighter. Gray and metallic with a fancy lace eloping it–vines and roses, perfectly crafted to be comfortable to hold while simultaneously being bold and beautiful even with scratches and dents along the body. Silco caressed the carvings with the pad of his thumb. Specifically a scratchy name on the front of it. Until he was holding it properly, he extended it enough to flick the small thing open and ignite it.

The flame dances dimly, alone. Slico rolls the cigar in his fingers and hovers it over the fire, lighting the end of it. Flicking the lighter closed, he takes a long drag of the cigar. Savoring the smoke he inhales, holding the earthy smoke in his mouth. Not letting it fester for too long he puffs it out. 

Above him is an audible creaking followed by a loud thunk behind him, just then he felt his eye send a sharp pain throughout his face. He takes another drag, hoping that it eases his nerves. It does not. Huffing it out he turns the chair to face the girl sitting impatiently on his desk. Strews of papers now scattered about. Screw organization.

"You have impeccable timing," Jinx smiles and tilts her head side to side while lazily whipping the end of one of her braids of hair in a swirling motion. Jinx then scoots forward. The papers crumpled under her butt make the scooting easier, some falling off the edge. She places her feet in between Silcos spread legs, planting them firmly in place and with most of her leg strength she easily moves the chair with the bemused kingpin closer to the desk. The chair creaked as she did so. Jinx blows a raspberry and guiltily giggles. 

"Pfft- yeah just the best of timing, heh" She snatches the device out of the top drawer. Moving her legs she turns the chair to the right to pull him even closer, the armrest bumps roughly into the desk. Jinx plops her legs on top of his kicking her feet under the other armrest. The kingpin throughout this doesn't seem bothered, used to his daughter's theatrics. 

"You mustn't spy on me when I'm in a meeting" Silco narrows his eye at her, no actual malice in his expression. He positions the cigar away, so she doesn't smell it when he gently places it in the ashtray, not snubbing it out.

"Wasn't spying — just watching Ms. Righty" Jinx chuckles at her own morbid nickname, and drapes her forearm on Silcos head, as she leans on the chair. The device occasionally tapped against his temple. The blue-haired girl whines about being bored and how Sevika won't let her on jobs. Calling his right-hand an ogre that isn't cool or fun–but is, however, currently green as Jinx had shot her with paintballs. The reason why Sevika was fuming in his office not too long ago. Silco listens, nodding his head along to her rambles in a tired fatherly way. In his right hand he fidgets with the lighter. The glint reflecting off the window light brings the small thing to Jinx's attention. Abruptly stopping in the middle of her rant, watercolor eyes flickering at the silver most importantly at the poorly written name on the front of it.

"Watch'ya got there?" She hitches her leg up on the arm of the chair and rests her tilting head on her knee, unblinking eyes stare at the item in his hand. Silco unclenches the lighter and grips it with his fingers slowly handing it to the curious baby blue. She quickly picks the thing out of his grasp after dropping the device on the table with a low clank. She brings the lighter closer to her face, so she can fix on the smudged words, muttering under her breath "is that a 'a' or an 'b' or maybe a-?" she would've gone through the entire alphabet if Silco had not said her name to pull her out of her thoughts.

"What does this say, can you tell me?" Frantic, she moves the light far away from her face, dramatically turning her head to the patient kingpin, his hands hanging loosely between his thighs humming in a low tune, debating on entertaining her offbeat curiosity.

"Aww' c'mon I'm dying of boredom here!" Jinx flails around her spot before falling onto her back with her arms spread out on the desk, her head is to the left looking at the metal rectangle with a pout. Twirling it with her pink and blue nails. Silco sighs, looking at his suddenly sad daughter–he knows she's just playing him, he caves anyways. Not without teaching about bartering, when a certain stinging sensation occurs. The nerves of his left eye spread out to his scarred side, eating away at him.

"Administer my medicine, then I'll think about it" Jinx pouts, but hands him the lighter anyway. Grabbing the device that was left on the table. "Finnee-" Grumbling, she moves forward so she's close to his face and places the contraption over his eye. She waits, eyes flickering from the button on top to his bad eye. When her gaze finally looks at the good eye, she presses the button. Instantly, he shoots forward, straining in his seat as Jinx still holds onto his jaw. He tightens his grip on the light. The dose of shimmer elopes his eye–the red widening before shrinking back to an orange. The purple substance fighting away at the toxins left behind, a single shimmer tear runs down his scarred cheek. 

"Done! Now, tell me!" Jinx haphazardly drops the medical device on the desk, again. Pulling up her legs on the arm, so she can rest her head on knees, and dig her colorful nails into her muted maroon pants. She puts most of her body weight on the side of the chair, making it dip only slightly. Waiting for her father to catch his breath and follow up on his end of the bargain. Slicking his salt and pepper hair back, he leans into the chair. Adjusting his sitting and wiping away the tear before answering her.

"It reads Lady." 

"Why does it say that and why do you have something that says that and why is it so badly written?-" He sighs, still rubbing at the now disappeared shimmer. Jinx's questioning doesn't throw him off, his eyes narrow in amusement. "Will it ease your curious need about my youth if I told you it was from an old friend?" Jinx gives him a weird look.

"I thought you said we shouldn't hold onto the past and blah blah blah" Jinx begins to flap her hand in a talking motion. He grabs her wrist, making her look him in the eye. His face was serious.

"We shouldn't hold onto the past and let it consume us." He says sternly, letting her go when she begrudgingly nods. Jinx notices a fondness lit in his eye, as he then gestures to the lighter in his hand. The flame, as quickly as it appeared, dims away.

"That is more or less something nostalgic, a keepsake out of appreciation" Jinx looks at him then the lighter, then back at him. "For who?" Jinx asks. Silco smirks.

"An old friend"

"UGHHH" She dramatically flops down again, crossing her arms. Jinx begins to spin Silco, moving her legs accordingly, in an attempt at a punishment for making vague remarks. Silco lets her for only a moment, stopping her when he's fully faced in front of her by taking the leg off the armrest and letting it drop to the floor next to the other. Silco hums in thought.

"It was...from a past love of mine" From her sitting position, Jinx snaps her head up. Her attention gained back. She's not perturbed by this new information, her curiosity only grows. "Hehehe, you fancied someone?" She giggles, hunching over. Her hands either side of her thighs gripping the edge of the desk and kicking her hanging feet.

"Mhm, I did..." As memories of the past flood his mind, he forcefully wrestles himself from saying ‘I do’ . The past should linger in the past, and in the palm of his hand like a burdensome weight. Despite this, his thumb still circles around the lighter. In response, Jinx visibly slouched, her frown growing more pronounced.

"What happened?" Jinx knows now that this friend is no longer here, someone who was once close to her father–she began thinking. Her gaze flicks restless between Silco’s eyes, her hands fidgeting as they cling together. Her thumb incessantly rubs against her palm, creating a raw spot on her skin. Sensing the tension, Silco quietly places his hand on her knee, tenderly tracing comforting lines with his fingertips to ease her away from the rhythmic rubbing and her own reminiscing. 

He knows Jinx would ask non-stop about this subject, as if she were still the 12 year old that he took in years ago. Even if he did indulge Jinx in her possible endless quest of nagging him til’ he complies. He would have no idea where to begin, he’s sure that his late-companion would tell it differently, albeit dramatically. Jinx has learned through his lectures of betrayal, perhaps one on loyalty might have the same effect. 

"What happened to most Zaunites during the revolutionary years-" Silco lifts his head smoothly, his gaze hardening with growing anger. Behind the pride he feels for his expanding nation, he holds a knife to the throat of the ‘Nation of Progress’ Silco’s thoughts travel back to his last moment with her, realizing the irony that lies within the nickname of Piltover. With a cool deliberateness, Sico carefully considers his next words as he looks at his daughter. Who is seated with uncharacteristic patience. 

The cigar in the tray burns, forgotten. "-Perishing with no name under the cold gold-plated boot of Piltover"

[nymphoniah]

shotgunning a cigar while grinding in origins!logan’s lap 😵‍💫😵‍💫

steal away | logan howlett

pairing: origins!logan x afab!reader

i literally can’t stop thinking about smoking with logan, whether it be the two of you stepping out for a quick smoke break, to him busting out a cigar after the two of you just had sex. like ohmygaaaawd. i need to be put down. thank you anon for giving me another scenario to fantasize about >_<

content/tags: nsfw, minors dni, 18+ only, suggestive content, dry humping, grinding, pet names (princess, doll, etc.), teasing, very very subtle dom/sub vibes.

you could see him all riled up when he comes back home from work, his muscles aching and sore—begging for your attention.

he flops onto the couch, his legs splayed, both arms resting across the backrest of the couch. and tilts his head back, spotting an upside-down version of you typing away furiously on your laptop keyboard.

a little whistle escapes out from the corner of his lips, grabbing your attention. he flashes you a coquettish smile, his hands gesturing to come join him on the couch.

you follow his command with no hesitation, wanting any excuse to get away from work—sending chains of corporate emails could only get so interesting.

pulling his legs together, he pats his quads. “c’mere princess, need to get a good look at you,” he mumbles, reaching over to the coffee table to grab a cigar.

you help logan, passing him the straight cutter placed alongside the ashtray, playfully pulling the rusted lighter he kept in the chest pocket of his flannel.

you flicked the lighter, shielding the flame from the cool breeze that lingered from an opened window in the kitchen.

his scent floods your senses as you lean into him with the lighter in your hands, his lips wrapped tightly around the cigar—the strong musk of wood and amber. the unique smell of him when he comes back from the lumberyard.

taking your hand in his, he guides the lighter to the end of the cigar. logan’s hazel eyes bore into yours as the smoke floods between the two of you, reluctantly letting your hand go.

“can’t get enough of you, darlin,” he grumbles out the corner of his mouth, followed with a puff of smoke.

you place the lighter and cutter over to the side, which eventually would be lost between the cushions later tonight.

his hands move their way to the small of your back, the calloused pads of his fingertips teasing their way underneath your nightgown.

a small gasp slips out from your lips as his hands continue to work at your skin—it felt as if you were on fire, his cold hands roaming further down, playfully tugging at the waistband of your panties.

your hands steady themselves on his brooding shoulders, giving him a little squeeze of affection. “it tickles, logan,” you chuckle, resting your head against his chest, eyelashes fluttering against him.

you can feel him exhale in response, his hands making their way to your ass, grasping at the plump flesh. “sorry, doll. just can’t keep my hands off you.”

you whine against him, and before you know it, your hips start to move on their own; the steady rhythm of your grinding matched the way his chest faltered up and down, feeling his length grow beneath you.

he gives you a slight tap on the ass, signaling for you to look back at him. “eyes up, princess,” he lulls into the shell of your ear before you pull back to meet his gaze.

“wanna taste?” logan asks, pulling the cigar away from his lips. the timbre of his voice making the offer even more tempting.

you nod your head eagerly, moving your hand from his shoulder to reach for the cigar, but he teasingly pulls it further away from you grasp, a tsk escaping from the corner of his mouth.

“use your words, princess.”

“can i have a taste, lo?” you respond rather hastily, your eyes flicking back and forth from the cigar to his lips, curled forming an impish smirk.

“c’mon. you’re missing something,” he taunts, raising his eyebrow.

“please?” you sweetly add, rutting your hips against him as an added oomph to your little request.

“‘atta girl,” he groans, feeling his cock twitch at the friction, nails digging into the soft flesh of your ass to ground himself.

with his other hand, he pulls the cigar back between his lips, deeply inhaling, letting the smoke linger in his mouth for a bit, and rests the cigar against the ashtray.

his face now a mere inch away from yours, he firmly grips your chin, and you slack your jaw open, your plump lips parted.

logan then steadily shotguns the smoke into your mouth—the heady aroma of ash and tinder flooding your senses, followed by the rush of the nicotine entering your bloodstream.

the buzz made everything feel more pleasurable, intense. the way his nose gently nudged against yours sent a shiver down your spine, the way you felt his dick grow even bigger made you press your pelvis into his further.

your head finds its way back nestled deep into his chest, and your hips seem to have a mind of its own as you continue to grind sensually against him.

“such a needy girl, huh?” logan teases, his hands guiding your hips, allowing you to rut faster against him.

“missed you so bad, lo. waited for you all day to come back home,” you whine, pressing kisses against him, the coarse hair of his chest riling you further.

“well, you’re in for a treat tonight, princess…”

[desktopmermaid]

K one last thing, my friend mentioned cookie as a cookie cutter shark and I was rly amused that they’re also called the cigar shark lol

[smoketransformer]

Frank’s Auto Shop

Frank’s Auto Shop has been in business for forty years and never once has there been an audit, so Frank himself was quite surprised when an auditor walked into his shop.

“Mr. Fuller, my name is Charlie Thompson. I’m with the IRS,” the young man said while setting his brief case down and then pulled out a government issued identification card. The young man must have been right out of college - perhaps about 22 years old and he did not seem the friendliest. He put his card back in business coat and crossed his arms.

Frank huffed and then said, “Call me Frank…or Sir. I’m the boss around here. See the sign out front?”

“Got it, Frank,” Charlie said, “I’ve came to discuss an upcoming audit of your business.”

Frank opened his shop back when he was this auditor’s age. Always ran it by himself. He built it from the ground up and he wasn’t going to let this boy or the Feds take it away from him.

“Why haven’t I been notified of this?” Frank angrily said. Frank was a big man who was bald, but made up for it with a big, bushy goatee that was starting to turn gray.

“A Ms. Buchanan should have called you. If not, I guess this is your notification. Now please, could we sit down? I have to interview you and ask a few question.”

Frank stared at the boy. “Fine. We can go into my office.” Frank motioned and started to walk to the back of his shop. “You’re lucky that it is slow now, Chuck.”

“Please don’t call me Chuck. It’s Charlie, not Chuck,” Charlie corrected him as he followed.

The two of them entered the back office. Charlie immediately noticed the haze and smell of stale smoke. Frank sat behind his desk that was covered with bills. On top of the various pieces of paper sat a large ashtray with a few spent cigar nubs.

“Now, Mr. Fuller…” Charlie started to say.

“Frank or Sir, I told ya,” Frank sternly said.

“Frank, what is your age?” Charlie asked as he pulled out a notepad and pen.

“62,” he mumbled.

“Any plans to retire?” Charlie continued as he was making notes.

“No - can’t. Gotta run this business till I’m dead. I got no savings. Everything is in the business,” Frank spatted.

“No children to take over? Planning on selling it?” Charlie asked while not making any eye contact.

“No and no,” Frank said, “What’s this got to do with anything?”

“You see mister…sorry, Frank…you owe the government a bit of money. $494,078 to be exact. You haven’t paid income taxes,” Charlie spoke up while looking up from his notepad.

“Yes I have!” Frank yelled as he stood up, his face getting red.

“Please, Frank. I’ll explain. Frank Fuller has. Frank’s Auto Shop hasn’t. You never filed as a sole proprietorship. You never submitted the proper forms. Therefore, your business and you are two legally separate entities.

Frank huffed. Running his business was tough; and running it on his own after all these years made it even tougher. It was hard to hire someone who was both auto and business savvy. All Frank knew was cars. Frank looked at the stern look of boy and that was when he had an idea.

He walked around his desk and to a humidor on shelf behind Charlie. He had been saving this for another time, but he figured now would be better than ever given the current circumstances. Frank lifted the lid and picked up a large cigar. “Mind if I smoke?” he asked as he grabbed a cutter and cut the cap of the cigar.

“Actually, I do Frank,” Charlie spoke as he stood up.

Frank placed the cigar in his jaw and brought a torch lighter to the flame and started puffing, “Remember, I’m the boss?” The cigar came to life as smoke started pouring out of Frank’s mouth. Frank took another pull from his cigar, inhaled and looked at Charlie. He exhaled the smoke straight into Charlie’s face. “I think it is time I start asking the questions. Sit.”

Charlie obeyed and sat back down. Charlie was starting to cough and Frank knew that was a good sign. It meant that some of the smoke went into his lungs. This made Frank smile with his fat cigar in his jaw.

Frank sat back into his chair with Charlie staring at him. Frank pulled on his cigar “So Chuck, do you like your job?,” Frank continued while blowing more smoke toward Charlie.

“Yes. And my name is Charlie,” he answered.

“Boy,” Frank blew more smoke, “you be honest with me. And I like Chuck more.”

“No Sir, I don’t. I hate my job. And I do prefer to be called Chuck anyways. I’m Chuck now.”

“That’s what I thought, Chuck. And that is why you are here for a new job? A new life?”

“No Sir, I’m here to…” Chuck stopped as more smoke was blown in his face. “I mean, yes Sir. I wish to become a mechanic. I want a new life.”

“My smoke and I can give you that. Do you know anything about cars, Chuck?” Frank continued his questioning while he enjoyed his cigar. Every time he exhaled, he blew the smoke in Chuck’s face.

“I do. Been working on cars since high school.” Knowledge of cars flooded Chuck’s brain. Charlie knew nothing about cars, but Chuck did.

“Did you go to college, Chuck?”

“No Sir. I didn’t even finish high school. Dropped out at 16.” As knowledge of cars filled his brain, everything he knew about accounting went away. Charlie’s memories about school and college were being replaced by new ones. New ones as Chuck.

“Good - I never finished school either. I thought it was a waste.” Frank was happy his smoke was haltering his soon-to-be employee. “You look like a mechanic. You work out?”

“Some Sir. But trust me, I enjoy my beer too,” Chuck replied. As he said this, his face grew a bit and his neck got a little larger. Frank thought he was starting to look more like a man and not a boy.

“When were you able to grow out your beard?” Frank blew a thick cloud of smoke.

“Started shaving when I was 13. Always been hairy.” As Chuck said those words, a short beard appeared on his face while his hair got shorter, as if the hair on top of his head moved to his face.

“And when did you start going bald, Chuck?”

“Probably around 16. Just embraced it at 18 and shaved it all off.” His beard grew larger and his head was completely bald.

“Well, good thing it suits a mechanic like yourself.”

“Yes Sir. Guess being a mechanic is in my genes.”

“I’d say so.” Frank took a deep inhale and exhaled the largest cloud of smoke toward Chuck. He knew the next questions would make the change permanent. “You like my cigar smoke, Chuck?”

“I do, Sir,” Chuck was breathing the smoke deep into his lungs.

“Do you smoke cigars, Chuck?”

“I do, Sir. Started when I was 16.”

“How’d you start, Chuck?” Frank was constantly exhaling more and more smoke into Chuck’s newly bearded face that will always smell of cigar smoke.

“Don’t you remember? I came here, looking for a job right after I dropped out. I always admired you. Wanted to be just like you. You said you only hire men, not boys. I said I am a man and you handed me a cigar. Told me to prove it and smoke it. Got hooked then and there. Been smoking them ever since,” Chuck said, eyeing Frank’s cigar.

“Oh yeah, that’s right. Sorry I was the reason you become a smoker.

“Don’t be sorry, Sir! I love my cigars. I can’t imagine not smoking ever again. If anything, I should be thanking you,” Chuck said.

“Yeah, you should be thanking me,” Frank laughed. “Can’t believe I forgot hiring you after you smoked one of my cigars. Old men like me forget these types of things. Which is why I called you in here. I want you to take over my business when I retire.”

“Really, Sir?” Chuck replied in shock, “I would be honored.” As he said this, his business suit turned into a jumpsuit.

“I mean, you have been a good worker the past few years. You are like a son to me.” Frank stubbed his cigar out in his ashtray. “Just know that my business has some debts that you’d have to take on. Also, I expect to still be on the payroll after you take over. This is my life savings and retirement.”

“Wow, thank you Sir. You are like a father to me as well. I’d be more than happy to keep the family business going for you,” Chuck eagerly replied and stood up to shake his boss’s hand.

“We can hug it out,” Frank pulled Chuck in and hugged him. He noticed Chuck smelling his dirty and smoky coveralls. “Need a cigar, Chuck?”

“I do, Sir. You got me craving one after seeing you smoke. Been a few hours since my last.”

Frank walked to his humidor and pulled out two cigars. He cut them both and handed one to Chuck, who eagerly grabbed the lighter from his coveralls and brought the cigar to life. Chuck took a deep inhale. “Mmm, much needed. Well, better get back to work.” Chuck clenched the cigar in his jaw and said “Thanks for giving me just what I needed.” He then walked out of the smoky office, leaving a trail of smoke behind him.

As soon Chuck left the office, the phone on the desk rang. “Frank,” he answered with his cigar firmly clenched in his teeth.

“Hello Mr. Fuller! This is Laurie Buchanan with the IRS to notify you that an auditor by the name of Charlie Thompson will be stopping by this morning to ask a few questions. Will you be available?”

“Why yes Ms. Buchanan!” Frank exclaimed while taking his cigar out of mouth. “Charlie must have came early. He has actually already left. He said I gave him just what he needed and he is now long gone.”

“Perfect, Mr. Fuller. Do you have any questions?” the woman asked.

“Actually, I am about to retire soon and just hired a new employee who will be taking over the business. Is there a form I need to submit?”

After a lengthy conversation with Ms. Buchanan, Frank walked into the smoke filled shop. He smiled with his cigar. Chuck was working on the engine of a muscle car while smoking away. Frank noticed that Chuck must have already finished his first of many cigars as there was freshly lit one in his jaw. Frank thought Chuck was adapting to his new life perfectly; but to Chuck, this was the life he has ever known.

[xxgoblin-dumplingxx]

i'd love to see more from the poly reader x poolverine verse im obsessed w them

"I didn't realize your... roommates were home today," Your sister said helping the youngest into his coat.

"It's what happens when you don't call," you caution. "They live here. You want free babysitting, you accept the terms. Sometimes it's kazoos. Sometimes it's roommates." For now, you'd accept her calling them roommates. It was partly true. And it was less rude than what your mother had said. She called them your caretakers.

Sarah narrowed her eyes at you and you shrugged, "They're fed and in one piece. And Zach has part of his social studies paper done. You're welcome."

She watched for a second as her boys willingly accepted hugs and kisses as you ignored her, beseeching them to learn something at school and make good choices and she sighed, "Thanks."

"Call next time," you tell her giving her a meaningful look. You didn't live alone anymore. And if she didn't want her kids exposed to certain things then she needed to give you enough lead time to hide those things... Today she got lucky.

________________

"Shhh," Wade said, holding up a hand, "You hear that?"

"Hear what?" Logan said opening a beer.

"Silence," Wade sighed, sinking on to the couch next to you, handing you a glass of wine. "Holy shit."

"And that's why I like being the cool Aunt," You tell him yawning. "I show up late. I bring presents. I leave before the crying starts. And then I enjoy my nice quiet house."

Logan snorted and reached over to rub your neck as he took your other side and picked up the remote, "Nice little racket, bub."

You take a sip from your glass and stretch, snuggling into Logan's side and putting your feet in Wade's lap, "Not too shabby, boys."

"For roommates," Wade teased, smacking the bottoms of your feet affectionately. "Didn't know roommates fuck like we fuck."

"Sorry-"

Logan grunted and wrapped his arm around you, "Pause was doin' some heavy lifting there."

"Mom... doesn't approve. What dad knows depends on the day. And I think my grandparents would just drop fucking dead. So. There's that." You lean over and lift a sleepy Mary into your lap and stroke her back before resting your head against Logn again. They are who they are and you are who you are. You don't fit in with the cookie cutter perfect family they have and you haven't from the second you took your first breath. But you fit here with a variant and a mercenary and their ugly little rat dog.

"We could ruin Christmas," Wade offered, "Just go make out in front of-"

"Or," you hum, "we can leave well enough alone so I can still hang out with the kids and let them have someone around that's somehow less fucked up even if I'm objectively a mess."

The boys traded a look and Logan kissed the top of your head. They'd work out the specifics later but for now, as long as your sister kept her comments to herself they'd behave- mostly. As long as it meant you got to see the kids. Because it was clear it made you happy, and because; truth be told, it hadn't been too bad today.

Wade cradled one of your feet in his hand and grinned, "I got a question."

"Might have and answer," you tell him, hissing when his thumb hit a tender spot on your instep.

"Why do all the rugrats call you, Shush?"

"My parent's housekeeper calls me Sugar," you answer. "Everyone sort of adopted it and Zach couldn't say it- so it devolved into Shush and stuck."

"Stop it, that's precious," Wade cooed, "I thought they called you that because they were always telling you to shut-"

"Not all of us went to school thinking our first name was Damn it," you snort.

Logan smirked and let go of you long enough to light his cigar. "What'd she call your sister?" he asked.

"Honey. Or Princess if she was being annoying... it's just that neither ever really stuck."

[kisames-corner]

Countdown to Kisame Week '25

Sharks, like our favorite fish man, often get a bad rep (well, maybe Kisame’s reputation is deserved), and are usually the target of many people’s fears. While they are wild animals and behave as such, there is more to these incredible creatures than the world sometimes give them credit for!

In the weeks leading up to Kisame Week, we’re going to share some incredible facts about sharks–after all, with over 400 unique and diverse species, there’s a lot to celebrate!

Join us as we sharpen our swords, grab our writing and art tools, and prepare for one hell of a Shark Week: Kisame Week 2025!

Up first, Sharks and their appetite!

Did you know...

When close to giving birth, female sharks (both when laying eggs and giving live birth) will lose their appetite. This instinct is thought to prevent cannibalism when the newborns enter the world.

There are three known ram-feeder sharks! Similar to how baleen whales sweep up krill and zooplankton, basking sharks, megamouth sharks, and whale sharks feast upon millions of tiny invertebrates, small fish, and zooplankton to power their massive bodies–they can filter out on average 450 tons of water to capture their prey.

Sharks’ bite can pack a punch! The Cookie Cutter Shark, also referred to as the Cigar Shark, will approach its larger prey and steal a chunk of their flesh in the dark depths of the Pacific and Atalntic—they leave a curricular mark, similar to a cookie cutter device on fresh dough!

Join us for Kisame Week 2025!

Choose up to 20 prompts this year, and select your faves out of the 40. This year, we decided to mix things up a bit, and prompts were submitted by our lovely server members, but voting is open to all! Though we are still doing the Any AU list, they were not separated this time, so an AU has the potential to be one of the prompts for a day!

As always, if you have any questions feel free to reach out! Our ask is open for any and all questions you may have.

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General Timeline:

• Voting time: April 30th-May 11th • Creation time: May 12th-July 5th • Kisame Week: July 6th-13th

[polkadotjohnson]

MacGyver - Cigar Cutter (2017)

[blimpintraining]

Attention fellow beefy boys:

Cattle tags. Yes. But get the goat sized ones. The cow sized ones fit better in a collar. Etsy has places that offer custom laser cut stuff for very affordable prices. Use a cigar cutter to get the stud guide flat and level with the rest of the tag, and hold it in place with either a fake plug or real plug.

[pwlanier]

Philippe TOURNAIRE for S.T DUPONT - CATACOMBES

Set consisting of a fountain pen, a lighter and a gilded bronze cigar cutter representing the accumulation of human skulls that can be seen in the catacombs of Paris. Limited edition published in 2011 in 66 copies (n°25).

The pen: closing the cap by clicking. Cartridge or converter filling. Feather M in 18k two-tone gold.

Artcurial

[sludgevomit]

My back was pulled against the leather recliner almost magnetically. Strained muscles seeking comfort after operating on misbehaving pieces of Meat that now laid unconscious in the basement. Hours passed before the lessons became ingrained in their minds. Putting Sir at unease; disappointed by unwarranted disobedience.

Rare thoughts of domesticity littered my mind as I examined the Pet that earned Sir’s trust and small percentage of respect. Their body on the tranquil bed across from the recliner that was tucked into the corner. Book locked between fingertips; focus drifting away from the small font. Their attention flowing towards the looming creature that was myself. Waiting for the echoes of my commands to release into the air. “Why don’t you be useful and do me a favor, Little Thing.” My hand moves to scratch my chin before using it to direct the being around the room. “Grab me a cigar from the humidor. The torch and cutter as well. Come sit on Papa Bear’s lap when you are ready.”

The Pet shot up in an instant. Always working fast in order to please me. Using the praise to motivate their will to live. Finding the humidor with ease, yet freezing up when it came to the selection of different colors, labels, and sizes for each tobacco wrapped stick. “Now, it doesn’t matter which one you pick. Sir only buys his favorites. Schnell.” Eyelids shutting as my stern words fizzle out. Anticipating with evaporating patience as the pads of my fingers drum against the soft, tanned skin of the armrest. Dried blood flaking off with each tap on the material.

Opening my field of vision when the Pet made themselves a home on my lap. Curves of their ass flush against my crotch. Eyes wide, proclaiming innocence and desire when the firm grip of my hands ran over brutalized thigh and leg flesh that draped over the side of the comfortable chair.

“Papa Bear is going to teach you how he enjoys his smoke. The exact way he cuts the cap, and how he toasts the foot. Listen carefully to his instructions. He is in no disposition to model this act for you. You should already have an idea from watching this ritual be done many times before as you were kneeled down by my side.”

[whatever-imagines]

Can you we please get more Butch Wolverine?! Please?

Merry Christmas.

Literally

Rated: G

——

Logan scratch the back of her neck uncomfortably while staring at the party goers. There were too many sounds, too many smells, too much… everything happening all at once. She craved the solitude of her room; the distraction of you came to mind, maybe she could convince you to ditch the Christmas party all together and hide away from everyone.

Logan’s keen eyes seek you out and find you in the crowd. You’re dressed nice, cute; carrying a bag of presents as you distribute gifts to your friends and teammates. You looked so happy and thrilled to make everyone else happy and thrilled.

On second thought, maybe Logan should just pull a lone wolf card and leave by herself. You seemed to be enjoying yourself too much to have her pull you away for selfish reasons.

As she turns away though, she hears you call her name, hears you wrangling through the crowd, and Logan is equal parts thrilled and worried. What if you try and make her stay? Or worse, join in on the festivities.

“Lo! Logan, wait a sec, I have something for you!”

The Wolverine groans lowly. It wasn’t that she was hard to shop for, it’s just that people misinterpret what she wants, and then she feels bad about not wanting the useless crap given to her.

“Listen princess-“ she starts to protest, starts to stop you, but she couldn’t get a third word out before you toss a very small package at her.

Logan catches it mid air, effortlessly. The wrapping was buffalo plaid, no bows or tinsel or extra dress. With a questioning eyebrow, Logan gives you a look.

You stare at her all starry eyed and excited. “Well? Open it! It’s your present!”

The wolverine shift her step. “I’m not big on gifts-“

“Open it, Logan.” You demand.

The firmness of your voice makes her relent. It’s a rare occasion to see you stand up to her about anything.

With deft fingers, the wrapping was removed, unceremoniously dropped to the floor, and once the small black box was revealed, Logan worries the worst, jewellery.

Sucking in a silent anxious breath, she opens the box.

“A leather keychain?” Logan questions, also taking not of a silver knob looking thing attached to the ring.

“Open the leather bit, it’s a cigar cutter!” You exuberantly explain.

Logan pauses as you continue to ramble. “You always use your claws and I know sometimes you’re in a place you just can’t pop them out, so I got you this nice one instead! And that little silver one is a cigar puncher, you can unscrew it to use it.” You go into detail, moving closer to show off the present you thoughtfully gathered for your companion. “There in this keychain so you can add it to your carabiner. Merry Christmas!”

Logan stares at you intensely. This was… honestly the perfect gift for her. True, she uses her claws mostly to cut her cigars on the road, and if that wasn’t an option, her trusty pocket knife was always there, even if it did a shitty job. This was well thought out and personalised to her specifically. You even got a puncher, another form of to open up certain kinds of cigars. And in a fashion she could carry it with her constantly.

A little reminder of you and your thoughtfulness.

Logan purses her lips together to think carefully about what she’ll say next, all the while you stand there, pretty and perfect, waiting for her to respond.

“Thank you.” She settles on. No jokes, no smart Alec comment. You deserved sincerity at this moment. “I didn’t get you… anything-“

“Well, do you like your gift?” You ask.

She did, Logan really did. She loved it, she loved how the leather smelt like the sweat from your palms, you must’ve messed with it greatly before giving it to her.

“Yes, but-“

“Then that’s the best present you could’ve gotten me!” you chirp, delighted.

Logan wants to respond smoothly, wants to give a compliment suave enough it makes up for not having anything physical to give you, but you’re called away by a smiling and laughing Jean.

Before you leave, you rush Logan for a quick hug, which she reciprocates. The scent of you fills her and makes her almost giddy.

‘Merry Christmas, indeed.’ She thinks idly, looking for mistletoe hanging around and planning on pulling you under it.

[book--wyrm]

Pengu Finale Liveblog ahhhhhh

Julian just absolutely brain blasting this old woman

Oh Rex is close enough to call her doll and make her breakfast he is not beating the deadbeat daddy allegation

OH NO DOES SHE KNOW OH MY GOD SHE KNOWS

NEVERMIND I WAS SO WRONG ABOUT EVERYTHING SHE HAS KNOWN ALL ALONG

holy shit holy shit holy shit

okay so they did find the bodies eventually holy fuck hooooooly fuck

oh my god rex literally teaching francis how to manipulate oz and use him oh my god ohhhhh my god this is so much more of a betrayal than if francis had just hated him for what he'd done

she knew all along she knew all along and she used him and she

she

oz was right ahahahahah every relationship in his life is fuckign transactional because he KILLED THE ONLY TWO BOYS WHO TRULY LOVED HIM, AND KILLED HIS MOTHER'S LOVE WITH THEM

dude he has to kill his mother now

this is a psychological nuke the likes of which i think sofia could not possibly have ever imagined.

Francis's FACE oh my god.

Julian baby boy maybe Sofia should stand out of sight to not break immersion

God this is absolutely not how hypnotism works is it

IT'LL BE EASIER NOW YOU LITTLE PSYCHO

"I see you in ways other people don't" while she is ACTIVELY USING HIM

dude. dude. I just. It's always the same with Oz, isn't it. Sofia, Eve, his mom. He's the biggest bullshitter in Gotham, and he's so full of it he doesn't have a clue how to sniff it out

God they are both so horrific to each other. Just his horrible cycle of selfishness and toxicity what a twisted family they are

HELLO VIC I MISSED YOU

Oh rip lmao I guess the gangs know the bliss is all gone

Vic baby he's saying all the same stuff oz does, only he believes it, so he can't bullshit people to his side

Oh hey that dude on the other side of the walkie talkie lived!!

Man Oz and Sofia haven't been face to face since ep 4 hahahaha

BERTO MENTION. she hasn't used that name in a hot second

Oh my god Sofia literally using that bird nest metaphor ahahahh whoever that anon was in my inbox you are a genius

Man. Sofia literally just laying out all their horrible family drama in the worlds worst family therapy oh my god

Dude I've been saying for weeks now that Sofia's superpower is to completely shatter people with the truth and. ohhhhhh my god ohhhhhh my god ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Wait. Is Sofia going to give that cigar cutter in her cleavage to Francis to use on Oz. I think she should give it to her.

Uh. Nevermind

Wow Sofia really is leaning into this evil therapy thing what the fuck. girl.

God i desperately want her to be the girl-jonkler running the aslume at the end of this show please please please

Also Sofia, I think it was the left. I mean I'm sure she knows just so she can do the other one next, but. man. she is fuckin sadistic. im love....

Julian so enthusiastic about all of this hahaahah

I love Sofia like, almost framing this to them or possibly herself as a gift she is giving to Francis. Is this cope? Is this something she sincerely believes? Or is she just being cruel?

I ALREADY FUCKIN KNOW

It's my finger you spineless prick hahahaahha but that doesn't matter to him because its your love he wants it's your adoration your pride and what actually happens to you? Doesn't fucking matter.

I NEVER STOPPED HATING YOU

Sofia's face right then like. damn dude. god i love her

She had enough love for all of them and he soured every last drop of it. For them, for him, for the world.

Sofia really does know the value of just letting a drama play out.

Francis saying Sofia is right this ep, Sofia saying Francis was right last ep, damn.

Oz really is... the only character in this show chronically incapable of learning

Damn mama cobb strong enough to smash a bottle. I don't think even i could do that.

Oh my god no wonder she said "they look at me like i'm not even theirs" because in her mind, she let their murderer go free

also is oz gonna hulk out that she's showing love to an imaginary jack and benny when oz has just seen her hate?

Oh is she just dying right now

Julian doing the get down mr president

MR DETECTIVE YOU DIPSHIT

Sofia baby you did great okay you already hurt Oz please just go to italy with your boy toy

Wow is he not getting this fucking stab looked at

EW EW EW EW

Yeah sure sure. Sofia stabbed you. Sure. Sure.

Oh noooo. Vic... baby.... he is such a believer in Oz's stupid self serving bullshit. He is so good. And pure. And he speaks from the heart and. And Oz acts like this is something Vic rehearsed

And they laugh about it but Vic doesn't understand. He doesn't understand that Oz isn't giving him advice on how to most effectively show people the fire you hold in your heart—he's teaching him the art of smoke and mirrors. how to con and grift and bullshit until even you don't know what's true and real

Christ. Vic is so fucking dead

She'd never look at me again unless i get this done.

Oz knowing now that this love is transactional. And fine. He'll make that transaction, he'll take down sofia and then maybe his mom will pretend again that she doesn't hate him, doesn't want him dead

it's not going to work, of course. it can't because this show is about him becoming the penguin. and it can't, because even that transaction was always a lie Francis told herself

I don't think she could ever have loved Oz even if he'd gotten her into a penthouse at age 20. I think she lied to herself to survive living with him, because what was the alternative? Losing all three of her boys?

AHAHAHAHAHAH SOFIA LITERALLY PICKING UP OZ'S GOLD SUMMIT MEMBERS i have to say. I did not anticipate this at ALL

damn girlie really is just gonna dip to go to italy or wherever

sofia really is just setting up the funniest game of capture the flag imaginable while cramming like seven olives in her mouth

i dont' say this often. i desire her carnally.

The gun in the glove compartment surely that will not come back later

Oz originally checking his image in the reflection of the car vs asking Vic now, treating this kid as his reflection

Damn. Is Link really going to fall for Oz's shit again after that truck of cigs thing? Or is this just a ploy to get Oz into the right place for Sofia to pick him up?

Actually maybe that's what loses Vic, that Link betrayed him, and Oz expected it. Idk we shall see

Penguin planning to run for mayor in a couple movies?

Oh Oz is totally gonna send sofia to arkham ahahaha poor baby

Oh my god I thought Sofia was gonna claim credit for Sal's death, not that Oz would give it up himself

I cannot tell you guys how fucking tempting it is to skip right to the end of this episode to see if i'm right you guys

Wow Oz really eyeing that Mayor's office

Is he going to kill Bella and frame Sofia. Is he gonna kill bella and THAT is what turns Vic on him.

oh my god LINK

HAHAHAH I WAS SO RIGHT SHE IS BURNING DOWN FALCONE MANOR

oh god that's the watch Sofia gave him for his birthday FUCK YOU CARMINE

Sofia really is gonna fucking screw over EVERYONE hahaha THREE CIGS BABY

oh god she is so hot i love her you self actualize through arson baybeeeeeeee

that shot of her throwing the cig like a dart is so much oh my god

babygirl i love you

you deserve the world

but yeah she is going into the cold according to the needle drop. definitely going back to arkham

... what's in the trunk. i don't think it's normal luggage. is it more bombs

there is still 20 mins left. i am afraid

This is clearly a trap for someone i just don't know who. Where is vic

I'm so afraid this is the last we get to see of Sofia.

She knows. She always has such a nose for bullshit lmao. Also fuck you Link you gotta know Oz is gonna stab you in the back.

I do think it's promising that Julian has not been seen all day tho. What is he doing.

I love this. I love that Oz and Sofia finally get this one moment to be truly honest with each other.

Well. At the very least, Oz gets to be honest with Sofia. idk that he knows how to be honest with himself anymore.

Why does this look like a chemical factory. I know it's not happening but it'd be so funny for Sofia to become the joker right now.

just dunk her in the goop

Man. Is he actually going to shoot her. Police pls come and save my girl. Cannot believe that's what I'm begging for now.

oh my god

yeah i called it but. Man. This is so painful to watch. also i think my julian prayers are not going to be answered it did not look like Sofia had planned any of this

okay i'm normal about sofia being arrested now.

Okay. I'm normal.

I'm back to not being normal francis and vic and oz all in one place this is all gonna blow up emotionally

Is francis in a coma. is she totally brain dead oh my god.

oh man she really is never going to say she loves him hahaha

she let jack and benny's murderer go and it never got her anything

is he gonna kill her now.

TELL ME YOU'RE PROUD OF ME oz you fuckin

he's so fucking delusional jesus putting her hand on his head

dude. is Vic actually gonna live through this episode

holy fuck

did not call that in the least

well. i was right about the pyrrhic victory for Oz

"All kinds of things" shut the fuck up.

God. I cannot believe Vic is living through this show. Admittedly as the kind of guy that his parents would have been ashamed of, but.

Wait. No no

don't

don't do it

no nondfonfodnfodnfodfn

please dont

pelase dont

oz don't you dare

nONONNNONONONONONONONONONONONO

PLEASE DOJNT DO IT NOW PLEAE

NO NO HE IS THEO NLY ONE WHO HAS SEEN THE WEAKNESS AND HUMAN IN YOU

OZ YOU

OZ

NO

WITH YOUR HANDS???? WITH YOUR FUCKIGN HANDS???? I THOUGHT HE WOUDL PULL A GUN AT LEAST YOU FUCKING

ODSOFANDFONSODNOSDAGNOGNIOAGDSASGJDISGNAGLNFGOSANFOSDO

SANO

NON NO NONONONO

VIC

vic. vic. vic barely lived a month longer than his family

all that good heart and he just. enabled a monster to rise to power. to make gotham worse

HE'S MUGGING HIM

YOU PIECE OF SHIT YOU PIECE OF FUCKING SHIT YOU BASTARD YOU

i

i

and the water takes him too.

JULIAN

oH MY GOD I WAS RIGHT AHHAAHHAHAHA

JULIAN

I WAS RIGHT ABOUT SOFIA GETTING MARRIAGE PROPOSALS HAHAHAHAHAH

SELINA KYLE???????? HELLO??????????????

bro.... oh my god..... this is....

I'm so happy.........

sofia smiling... sofia finding a new family member....

nvm i am so glad my original theories were wrong this is way better than anything i could have hoped for

oh my god

ohhhhh my god he actually is keeping his mom in a vegetative state.... exactly what she begged him not to do.......

she knows.... she knows... some part of her is aware in there ahahahahah

you should have let Rex kill him all those years ago

oh my god EVE???? EVE GIRL GET OUT BEFORE HE KILLS YOU TOO

oh no please tell me he never learned what happened with sofia and eve

hes literally just calling her ma. fuck me. mayeb that means eve is safe for now

NOT THE BATSIGNAL

[apocalypsesuite]

sofia took that cigar cutter from oz's apartment chances are he's about to lose a few digits

[youngcigarsmokingguys]

It was a cigar that Jordan had wanted for so long. He was spending a few weeks with his Aunt and Uncle while his folks were on a cruise in Europe. His parents had invited him along, but the thought of being stuck visiting cathedral after cathedral with old people didn’t appeal to him in the slightest. Plus Jordan loved spending time with his Uncle Andy specifically. His Aunt Amy was great but she was kind of a prude and always chided his Uncle Andy for cussing, telling off color jokes, or smoking cigars around Jordan. Jordan wanted to tell his Aunt to shut up because he secretly loved when his big, beefy, bearded Uncle would smoke and just be himself. Andy was one of the only people in his life who didn’t treat him like a kid. Jordan loved spending time with his Uncle driving around his acreage in his beat up old truck as his Uncle would smoke a cigar or drink a beer. He loved that he never took down the naked woman calendars he had in the shop when Jordan would come visit. Now that Jordan was older his Uncle would even give him a beer whenever he had one and they were alone. Andy had noticed his Nephews curiosity whenever he would smoke a stogie. He empathized with the him as he had also became fascinated with cigars in his teens. He took the chance to teach his nephew how to correctly cut, toast, and light a cigar. He even gave him a few puffs off of his occasionally. This weekend he and his wife were going to an away football game with friends. Andy thought this was the perfect time to reward his young Nephew for all of his help at the farm. When Jordan came in from doing chores his Aunt and Uncle were already gone. On his bed was a brown paper bag with his name written on it. He recognized his Uncles penmanship. Inside he was thrilled to find a 6 pack of beer, a variety of 6 large ring cigars, a brand new cutter, torch lighter and a note that said “Thanks for your help. I want you to have a great weekend. Don’t smoke these inside. Also the here is the code to disable the adult content blocker on the wifi. Be sure to turn it back on before we get home or your Aunt will freak. When you get home hide these from your folks and you didn’t get them from me. 😉 Andy”. Jordan was instantly hard sharing this secret with his bearish Uncle made him feel like a man.