#christmas fic sorta??
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eskawrites · 2 years ago
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had to postpone holiday travel for a big fucking snowstorm, so chapter 13 of this story that we found ourselves in is going up early bc i have nothing else to do lmao. enjoy!
“I’m sorry,” Nancy says quietly.
“Why?”
“You went through so much more than I ever did. Both of you.”
Robin scoffs. “We didn’t go through more. We were just louder about it. And dumber.”
“I got the benefit of the doubt. I don’t think anyone’s ever given you that.”
Robin looks away. Leave it to Nancy to say something that’s so affirming and so painful at the same time.
“I’m just glad you were spared,” she says when she finds her voice again. And it’s true. It is so earnestly, breathlessly true.
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piningpebbles · 11 months ago
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ive got a few posts queued for today but i just wanted to personally say merry christmas!! to all my mutuals out there let it be known i think you're all so cool and hope you're doing well through the holidays (even if you don't celebrate!!) and to my followers thank you for sticking with me through my various other fandoms you did Not come here for it Will Happen Again (and happy holidays too!!)
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ladycatofwinterfell · 11 months ago
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just take your time, we'll wait for you. when the thing you love becomes more of an obligation than fun it just loses it's spark and i know that very well. don't force yourself to do anything you're not up to at the moment🫶🏼
you’re all so sweet <3 I’ve decided not to write a fic for christmas for that reason, I don’t want to force it out of myself
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shebeafancyflapjack · 2 years ago
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Fire and Frost
Shameless Rhaenicent fluff! Happy Christmas / Wintertimes! Rated T for sexual implications but nothing explicit.
Do not be alarmed, I will be back to writing angst and horrific whump soon, was just in the festive mood and wanted my girls to be happy in this other timeline. ^_^
*
She’s shaken roughly from a serene, cosy sleep.
“Alicent! Wake up, you have to see this!” At first the voice takes her back to being awoken by her brother when they were small and he wanted them to sneak into the kitchens for a midnight snack.
Both brought the same reaction which she gives to the princess, grabbing the nearest pillow and hurling it hurling it in their direction, without even opening her eyes.
“It’s not even daybreak yet, go back to sleep.” she mumbles, exhausted from the journey it had taken them to reach this part of the country, and having only arrived six hours, collapsing immediately into the beds provided for them.
The pillow is deflected back onto her.
“There’s a chance it might have gone once the sun is up. Please, my love, just look out the window with me, pleeeease.” 
With the mother of grunts leaving her lips, Alicent pushes herself up to appease her obnoxious companion. She rubs her eyes and turns to the large window of their room in the Eyrie, her sleepy vision clearing to see the white flakes swirling down, covering their large balcony that looked out onto a glorious view of the Vale in all its splendour. 
Rhaenyra, still in her night clothes, is already wrapping a thicker fur coat around herself, her entire body wound up like a toy ready to spring out in chaos.
“Is that truly snow?” Alicent can’t hide the wonder in her voice.
In all her travels to the colder parts of the Realm, with the exception of the North which she’d yet to see any further than White Harbour, she had never seen snow, let alone be but a layer of glass from it.
“It hasn’t snowed on Midwinter’s Day since my mother was seven! And I’ve never seen it this heavy up here whenever we visited.” Rhaenyra roots underneath the bed for a pair of boots; “C’mon, we have to go to the courtyard before my cousins wake up and ruin it.”
“Ruin it by playing, you mean? Because they’re...children?” Alicent squints. And they’re both three-and-twenty.
The princess sits up, rolling her eyes; “I was here first! And we’re the guests! And their future Queens so, as far as I see, that gives us first rights to enjoy it!”
Alicent blushed, as she always did when Rhaenyra brought up their planned ‘future’. She was still set on making the declaration after her coronation, when she weilded more power, to announce that she would be taking no lord to be her husband and king consort. That, instead, it would be another woman at her side. Her childhood companion, the Hand’s daughter.
It all still felt like a fairy tale, a dream of two girls, one that Rhaenyra refused to grow out of realising would never come to pass, and one that Alicent was too lovestruck to tell her otherwise. We’ll deal with that when it comes to pass, she always told herself, though it did little to quell her anxiety.
Right now, however, she is far too captivated by the sheer joy in her love’s eyes to worry about such matters. She doesn’t know how to feel about snow, yet, but she knows above anything else how much she wishes to freeze this moment of happiness for Rhaenyra as long as possible.
Smiling, she gets off the bed and looks for her boots.
Shortly after, they walk through the near-empty hallways of the great castle, arm-in-arm. Rhaenyra’s grandfather, the Lord Arryn, and his second wife are still asleep, as are her other relatives. It feels as though they have the mountain to themselves. The servants bow or cutsy when passing, saying nothing about the crown princess and the Lady Hightower striding down the halls clearly not having been properly dressed, both their hairs unbound and falling free down their shoulders.
“Go on. Step on it.” Rhaenyra encourages Alicent once they’ve reached the courtyard.
Alicent had been satisfied by the sight of the garden, which had been impressive enough the day before, even with many of the flowers having wilted in the colder months, now covered under a blanket of white while further snow continued to fall, so delicate, from the opaline sky. 
Her toes curled at the thought of stepping onto it, even in these boots.
“Won’t I fall through it?” She realises how dumb she sounds once the question is out.
“No, you pretty idiot. It’s like a crunchy pillow, just step onto it like-.”
Alicent let out the smallest scream as Rhaenyra shoved her forward and the next thing she knew she was landing face-first onto the ground. Just as her gods damn brat of a lover had described, her fall was cushioned by the coldest, wettest pillow. A brief shock passed into irritation, so she quickly turned and threw a fist-full of the substance at the princess - well worth the risk of treason.
She spluttered as it hit her mouth, then she continued to laugh; “Oh I don’t think you’re experienced enough to challenge me to a snowball fight yet, sweetling.”
“I am soaked! You’re going to make me catch the Shivers!” Alicent’s anger could not compete with the humor, or how smitten she was with the silver-haired menace.
“Oh please, I’m a dragon and even I can handle snow!” 
She proceeded to prove her point by putting her arms out and falling backward into the pile, landing beside Alicent. Snow sprays her in the fallout, so she gives a soft kick to Rhaenyra’s leg.
“You’re far too jovial on today of all days.” Alicent chastises, playfully.
“What are you talking about?”
“It’s the Stranger’s Day! It’s supposed to be a day of quiet contemplation and being humble, if you have any idea what that word means-.”
“No I don’t.”
“Thought so. There’s little to no official ceremonies on this day,” with the exception of the Silent Sisters who were said to have their own private services; “and few people even mark it, but it’s definitely frowned upon to be giggling and frolocking like this!”
“Your gods frown on all the fun things.” 
She stiffens a bit at that; “They’re your gods too.”
Rhaenyra doesn’t deny that, nor does she really confirm. They’ve had this rather awkward conversation enough times for Alicent to know that religion, one way or another, doesn’t mean all that much to the princess. She might pay lip service to the Seven at the Sept but she knows her heart lies in studying what remains of the gods of Old Valyria, the legends she idolises more than the true gods of noble morals. The only reason that Alicent doesn’t let it come between them is because Rhaenyra has never been anything but supportive of what faith means to her.
“The Faith of the Seven is the only religion in the known world that doesn’t mark the seasons in some way or another.” Because they followed a lunar calander, Alicent doesn’t bother to point out; “I’ve read up on the religions of the east and west, even the fucking Lamb people have seasonal holidays. My mother’s family are devoted to the Seven, but we would always come visit here every winter solstice, and sometimes the summer, to celebrate in a way the south frowned upon.”
Alicent bites her lip. She hadn’t meant to cast any shadows on something as important as a family tradition.
The princess smiles; “Believe me, the farther north you go, the more exciting it gets. They still worship the Old Gods in Winterfell, Father took me there one Midwinter Feast, it was a mad party that lasted past sun-up. Our old Septa would have a heart attack at the ‘jovial’ things they got up too there.”
She had always wondered why the royal family chose to plan their tour around the continent during that particular time of year. 
“You’ll be telling me the Starks, of all families, engage in some sort of depraved heathen orgies with their people.” Alicent japes, rolling over closer to the princess, becoming less bothered by the chill of the ground.
Now Rhaenyra is the one whose eyes glint, thrilled though shocked; “And you accuse me of having a filthy mind. But sadly, if they did have any such practices, my parents made sure I was in bed before being aware of them.”
Velvet gloves grab at Alicent’s waist as the princess tugs her near. It can’t be denied that she feels a lot warmer. She glances down at the woman holding her, silver hair streaming into the snow, the lightest of white dusting her cheeks, which Alicent wipes off with her fingers.
Both following the same instinct, their lips meet, a rush of heat brewing as fingers cling to each others cloaks.
“I would have you take me right here, at the top of the world with the gods themselves.” Rhaenyra whispers to her.
“Down, my princess. Your cousins could walk in and the scandal would have your grandfather exiling you from your own ancestrial home.” Alicent warns, nose tips rubbing.
A spoiled ‘hmpff’ is her reply, along with a pout that just makes Alicent want to taste that lip again.
Later that night, after one of the biggest feasts she had ever attended, while still feeling cosy and intimate among the Arryn side of Rhaenyra’s family, the two of them curl by the fireplace in the guest chambers. They’ve both missed the sofa, Rhaenyra sat on the bear-skin rug with Alicent laid across her lap, struggling to keep her eyes open.
“I did warn you about the food.” The princess teases, rubbing at her companion’s stomach.
“Ugh, I wasn’t aware it was possible to consume so much gravy. I’ll never eat again.” Alicent moans, curling into her. “When I get back to the capital, if Father complains about my weight gain, I’m blaming you.”
“Mmm, let him grumble. I’d desire you if you were as large as the Toad Queen of Dorne.”
“I’ll hold you to that.” Alicent pokes her, preening as Rhaenyra’s fingers run through her hair. “You also forgot to mention the gifts. I felt so foolish, just sitting there!”
Rhaenyra tuts; “You don’t know my mother’s family, stupid, they don’t expect anything from you, they didn’t even know who I was bringing!” It had been a rather last minute decision when the King and Queen had been unable to attend due to Viserys’ poor health.
Sighing, Alicent makes the impossible struggle to sit up, battling against the rocks weighing down her gut. 
“I would have had a gift for you!” She frowns before looking down at the necklance that now hung around her neck. She reaches to lovingly touch it again.
A perfectly cut emerald in the shape of a dragon, attached to a Valyrian steel chain. The way that Rhaenyra had knelt down to hand the beautifully wrapped box to her had almost felt like a proposal, chaste and pure as it may have appeared to their hosts.
Rhaenyra’s fingers reach to curl around hers.
“I may have resisted the urge to tell you so it would be more of a surprise.”
“Sneak.” Alicent mutters before kissing her knuckles.
“You don’t need to give me anything, my love.” Rhaenyra lowers her voice, leaning in; “The promise you swore to be my true consort, no matter what comes, is the greatest gift I’ve ever received.”
“More than Syrax’ egg in your crib when you were born?”
“Fine, second best.” 
Alicent knows that nothing comes before a dragon when it comes to these Targaryens. If it were any other beast, she might take offense, but that big, pampered lizard had managed to steal Alicent’s heart as much as her rider had.
Beside the glow of the flames, she kisses Rhaenyra again, the princess moving her hand around to cup the back of her head.
“There is one gift I know I can give you tonight.” She murmurs, nuzzling her; “I may not be as full from dinner as I thought.”
Rhaenyra giggles; “Alicent Hightower. By the gods, I’ll make a depraved heathen of you yet.”
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anguishedlurker · 1 year ago
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(grabs you by the shoulder) Hi. 2.1k words.
Very little leaves Desiree horrified, you see.
She’s a genie, a djinn if you’re being weird about it; Genies grant wishes, and the desires of others can be…Well, rather fucked up.
And the people who could only be saved by a wish are those in such desolate state that Fate itself would prefer to pretend they don’t exist, the birsmirchment on existence too great to admit to.
If she was kinder about her wishes to such folk, that was between her and her final obliteration.
But her point was, most people wanted to use her to be lazy. To not have to dirty their hands with the task they set before her, be it in laziness or attempted refusal of responsibility for their actions. Murder was a fantastically common example of the latter.
So picture; She’s finally broken the brats latest attempts to ward her out of the town, and risen through the building.
Maybe she even left already and came back to leave a nasty surprise for the brat, who knew but for her, really?
The brat had been slumped over on a desk, talking to a painted rubber duck, the red head and cyan body oddly bright in the room.
As odd as it was, she couldn’t claim to care about it. Soliloquizing to inanimate objects was not as uncommon as people liked to pretend.
What was odder was that she snuck up on him, but the answer was simple; He had a cough.
A slight wheeze that had him choking and spluttering on the slightest of wrong movements easily hid the gasp of cold the brat gave.
It was a perfect chance, really.
For someone who had a more offensive powerset, that was. He wasn’t so inexperienced anymore; Any real fight would be her end.
Still, she could be annoying in the mundane sense. She just needed to figure out how while he was distracted.
And then her spotlight towards her goals, once he had stopped coughing.
“I just wish I could go back to when I wasn’t in danger. Just… just safe again.”
By all rights, this one should've been easy.
See, she had world ending powers by all accounts. Time, or the illusion thereof, being rewound on a global scale was not an object.
Obsession bloomed in her core, and her work should’ve been done in moments as she purred out “As you desire.”
It really shouldn’t have taken any thought. Most people’s words are easy to define away into the unideal or downright harmful.
The caveat to that is that she must still abide by her own definitions and technicalities, if no-one else’s could be abused.
But hey, sometimes a wish is genuinely complicated. Sometimes it has a lot of fiddly bits to pull off or needs extra information she didn’t get to look at before jumping in.
Safe is… Safe is a funny word, she’d have to say. Any of the living could trip on steps and die on impact. They’d be terribly unlucky, but not the first to die in such a manner.
So any definition had to, by default, forbid such realities from counting. If it counted, then there was no time at all she could send him.
It had to be his own specific problems.
It should’ve been automatic; Put him before the portal, maybe by a couple of years. Maybe make him a baby again. Who cares?
Safe is an annoying word. Safe is a word that cannot be defined by any one person to fit a whole, and must be assessed on a case by case basis.
The brat was a child. Children, to be safe, would be in low physical danger with access to basic physical needs.
She wasn’t sure what she bounced off of, at first. She had to look to find out.
The Fenton parents had never abided an OSHA law in their lives. They might argue that there were no established laws for their work, and she might have granted plausibility to such an argument if common sense had not evaded them so thoroughly.
No gun with a safety had been created in the house. Every stove repaired hardly better than standing near a wildfire.
She could ignore physical needs, at least, though the images left a bad taste in her mouth. A pantry stocked, as was their job. Never more. Never at the dinner table, never cooking.
His sister did that.
But Desiree could go further back.
Further.
And even further.
Sharp glass, contaminated labs let to the children to clean, insane behavior towards any electronic.
Could she even count the food as fine? They had no issues with letting cross contamination happen.
Young. Younger. Youngest.
Eight, nearly dead by proto-gun. He would never comprehend how lucky he was.
Six, they left for the week. For once they had not remembered to restock the pantry. Jasmine herself was not legally old enough to care for him, anyhow.
Four. They hadn’t learned to keep samples out of the fridge from the first poisoning, clearly.
Two. Can’t they keep a toddler out of the lab? It couldn't be that hard...
Zero should not be an age she ever looked at. But from the day he was brought home, he was in danger.
Now though, in this mess of a wish, she was dragged forward by her obsession.
It had to be complete. She could help or harm but she had to do it, she had to fulfill a desire as stated.
And all through the pregnancy, there was never a time where the contamination was acceptable. She never stopped.
Maddie Fenton would be dead before she’d consider fixing either.
Desiree shouldn’t have made it this far in the search to complete the wish, yet she couldn’t undefine safe to fit. The child would need to be in no notable danger from his environment.
The wish was uncompleteable without reaching through time to mess with these idiots neurons. Whatever her illustrative powers to force the world to turn back, or seem to, there were too many steps involved to both turn back the clock and change the people in the past. Whatever happened needed to be a logical consequence of one or the other, not both.
Such a wish would’ve, should’ve, left her drained yet smug.
Instead she had watched this boys life flash before her eyes and was left to wonder if CPS was a myth the living spoke of.
Vision clearing, cracks moving along her core, she was left blinking up at him.
She knew a lost fight when she got into one, and it took hours to lose him. She was lucky she couldn’t hear him over the wind and her thrumming core, she was certain of that.
He had no issues leveraging her obsession against her any of the previous times, so why now?
It all left her hiding out in a warehouse, glaring the Box Ghost into submission.
Lucky her, most ghosts thought she was stronger than she actually was. Even in their own piece of land she was believed to be best dealt with by not interacting.
She was sure the moment she touched a box it was time to leave again, but she just…
She needed time.
The child was a brat, to be certain. She would not be swayed on this topic.
A brat with a sad life, and a sad little burden all on his lonesome.
But she’d known that, hadn’t she? Never questioned it. Mocked him for it.
Dead, or a creepy little boy with creepy powers?
Creepy powers that could very well get him killed the rest of the way if his parents found out. Who knew what the lunatics would do.
A brat with nobody meaningfully in his corner. Nobody who both cared and was capable of protection.
Maybe that’s why he was Obsessed with protecting other people. Nobody who mattered for the job had deigned to do it for even a single moment in his life.
“I, THE BOX GHOST, HAVE RESIGNED TO ASKING YOU WHY YOU ARE HEErrrEEE.” The fool shouted, waving his arms. Boxes rattled around her in a threat display.
She was forced to give due respect to the display, and calmly put her hands up in accordance; Anything could be a formidable weapon if one were determined enough to make it work.
“I got ran off by the brat, and this has enough energy and low visibility on his radar.”
There wasn’t much need to lie.
Box Ghost seemed to assess this, floating around her in a circle path before shrugging.
“What, so, a day that ends in Y?” He asked, dropping the facade.
“It’s more… how I lost, than that I lost.” She offered carefully. She was in Box Ghost’s lair, and she knew that her welcome was thin to start with.
She suspected the look on Box’s face was more stink eye than proper appraisal.
“Look, I don’t want to fend you off. I’ll lose too many boxes doing that if you’re just… floating here. But I was hoping to have Lunch Lady over.” Box expressed, annoyed.
“As you desire.” She mocked, lifting towards the ceiling. This was not her territory to fight over, and she had so few offensive options if Box got a bright idea.
“Don’t even joke.” He groaned, going back to… categorizing boxes?
Not her Obsession, not her curiosity. She is out.
It still left her with a slightly cracked core and an angry teenager tearing his life to pieces to find the altered piece, looking for her all the while.
She was plenty capable of granting more wishes, at least. It would make her heal faster to do so.
Quiet, easy, mostly inane and stupid. Holding herself back from screwing people over too royally, lest the brat find her much too quickly.
It was easy and largely mind-numbing. He wanted money, she wanted the ‘stupid cunt’ to shut up, they as a collective wanted free-time to go camping.
A couple of twenties in the house to cover more groceries if noting else, all that took was a brief possession and staring more intently at the antagonistic woman's own computer, and it wasn’t hard to clear the troublesome one’s schedule.
Can’t have a schedule be blocked off if his abusive bitch of a girlfriend/fiance is dead in a car crash two hours from then.
She was forced to look at the pathetic mortals life for much too long. Truly, how does one get so insecure?
That was the highlight of her wish granting, honestly. It stopped her from going thinking about the child.
She had to tell him. She knew that. But she didn’t know how to do that.
But she didn’t want to think about it! Why go around making it her problem if she didn’t need to?
And now, an apartment in the bad side of town, obviously not meeting any sort of housing standard. There was a girl on the phone, sobbing away.
An easy mark to camp out, as she kept an ear to the rest of the apartment.
She was left to stew, again.
He was a brat that was owed more than he’d ever been given, and who hated her for perfectly good (and irrefutable) reasons.
She had to do more, too. But she didn’t know what yet.
Most people slightly sucked. Human nature and all that. Being a brat was hardly uncommon.
She also shouldn’t care that much.
But she did.
“I just wish he c-could give a real… I just-! He could be better! W-why isn’t he better??” She wailed.
Easy mark.
She had to conclude that it was another sad mark as the scene unfolded in her head.
Anyone could be better, but often there was nothing of meaning to salvage.
She was the other woman, strung along as he played both- no, all four women like cheap instruments.
Ew.
Of course his main girlfriend was suspicious too, and just as much of a cunt as he was. If she found out it wouldn’t be his ass on the line, it'd be the women.
And maybe, just maybe, that hit her where it hurt as she closed the wish by making him have his come-to-Jesus moment and resolve to dump all four and pack himself off to another state.
That might be her problem over all; She cared about those in bad spots. Tight situations that weren’t their fault.
She could see why the man would be called charming, even, having flipped through the pages of memory to figure out why this wish would occur.
And no child picked their parents.
Maybe she knew someone she could set up to watch him. That might be a better option.
Eight, six, four, two, zero. Never safe. Barely loved. If anyone had an ax to grind, he’d be helpless and left to dry in the cold in an instant.
She had to tell him, at least. Lunch Lady had truce with him, right? A message could be passed.
She hoped it could be seen as genuine.
She knew it wouldn’t be, but she had to anyways.
Thinking about Danny wishing to go back to a time where he wasn't constantly in danger, and Desiree not being able to find a time in his life that can fit the bill so just,,, nothing happens.
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thecoochiefairy · 15 days ago
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kill bill. toji fushiguro.
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𑄽𑄺 warnings 𑄽𑄺 27.5K word count. toji! fushiguro! third person omniscient pov, black woman, vaginal penetration, deflowering, angry sex, rough sex, sweet sex, sweet talkin’, hair pulling, squirting, creaming, oral [f] [m], choking, praising, LOTS of dirty talk, condomless sex, creampie, kissing, spanking, aggressive toji, caring toji, lil bit of sweet toji, violence, grief, loss, family drama, mention of suguru getou, minors aren’t welcome!
━━ 𝒄𝙤𝒐𝙘𝒉𝙞𝒆𝙛𝒂𝙞𝒓𝙮 𝙩𝒉𝙤𝒖𝙜𝒉𝙩𝒔 .ᐟ now look, you should know when i make a fic, that hoe definitely gon’ be long as fuck. so don’t scream at me, okay? let’s make this a lil early christmas gift to my babies. i think this my favorite fic i’ve written. i’ve chained myself to the bed to finish this. i loved this plot so much. so so much. omg y’all. please enjoy it. please. okay, i’ve said enough.
song while listening ᖭི༏ᖫྀ :: for certain, partynextdoor.
ᖭི༏ᖫྀ :: ….small note for name pronunciations within fic— nozomi (NO—ZO—ME) ami (AH—ME) isamu (EE—SAH—MOO).
PARTYNEXTDOOR FILLED THE SPEAKERS OF THE ROOM, R&B CRAWLING AMONGST THE WALLS. This is where she felt most at peace, her focus directly on her regular customer. 
“This is a new color for me, are you sure it’ll look nice?”
“Stop worrying, the color suits you beautifully. No black woman should ever turn away from brown hair,” she tells her, lessening the worry upon the customer's face. 
“Even at my age?” 
“Even at your gorgeous age, Ms. Bernice.” 
She adds the finishing touches, removing the curling iron as she sat it down on the table next to her. She spruces out the layered curls as she gives her a grin, “You’ ready to see?”
The woman who sat upon the chair nodded her head vigorously in excitement. She had been trying to convince Ms. Bernice to try a wig since she complained with her age that she was losing her hair. She offered to give her an age-appropriate bob, layered in between its curls. 
Her eyes gleamed as she turned in the chair to look in the mirror, a gasp of surprise escaping her lips as she inspected herself in disbelief, running her fingers through the silky soft hair, in complete shock that it was a wig. 
Her eyes sparkled in awe before turning back to her stylist, “It’s—It’s amazing! I look better now than I did with my real hair!”
“You looked just as beautiful before. I just enhanced your beauty,” she shakes her head, “It came out perfect.”
The woman laughed as she took out her wallet from her purse, “My husband’s going to flip when he sees this, you’re gonna get me in trouble!” 
Ms. Bernice then goes to pull out a fifty-dollar bill, this being her tip after already paying her in full as she says, “Thank you, Nozomi. You’ve really outdone yourself today.” 
Nozomi instantly takes the money, reaching around to put it back into her customers purse, “I told you to stop giving me those big ass tips, put some gas in your car or something. You know I’d do this for free if I didn’t have bills.”
The woman chuckled heartily as she pushed the money into Nozomi’s hand, making sure she took it, “Of course I know you’d do it for free, that’s exactly why I’m giving you a big tip! You don’t need the money, but you sure deserve it, you work so hard everyday, it’s the least I could do for you.”
She smiled as she then accepted the money, “Thank you. I really appreciate you.”
Ms. Bernice waves her hand, “Don’t start your sentimental stuff before I start crying. Anyways, can I book you again next week for a touch up? I have an event.” 
Nozomi sighs, “I’m sorry, my love. I’ll actually be out of town, my older sister’s getting married. I should be back a week after that.” 
“No worries—oh, a wedding, how beautiful. Congratulations to her. Where’s it gonna be?”
“It’s uh… actually a surprise to me. To the entire family, damn near. We won’t know until we get the invitations, but she gave us the dates and bought the tickets, so kinda sorta a free trip,” she briefly explains, “I’d never say no to that.”
“Ooh, a destination wedding, how exciting!” The woman clapped her hands together, “It’s like a mystery vacation,” Suddenly an idea popped into the her mind as she spoke, “Maybe it’s Vegas?”
Nozomi’s neck flung back, “God, I hope not. She might as well have Elvis be her damn officiant.”
Ms. Bernice chuckled as she spoke, “From the way you talk about her, she seems a little bougie. Probably Singapore or something.” 
“Now she knows our black ass family ain’t traveling to no damn Singapore,” Nozomi chuckled, “If that’s the case—pray for me. It’ll be a shit show.”
The woman laughed once more before nodding her head and standing up from the chair, grabbing her purse that rested on the counter on the opposite side of the room, “Maybe she’ll surprise you, send everyone off to Paris or something.” 
“The girl is bougie—never said she wasn’t a little frugal,” Nozomi replied as she walked her to the door.
“And that’s why you marry a rich man like your sister did,” Ms. Bernice finalizes. 
��That we can both agree on,” Nozomi chuckles, “See you next time, take a bunch of pictures for me!”
The woman gave a wave before walking out the door, “I will, I will! Bye bye now!” She shouted behind her. 
When she opens the door to let her out, Ms. Bernice stops herself from tripping as she nearly steps over an object along the ground. Nozomi looks down as she notices a pale pink box. 
She frowns, looking around the quiet outside before she hesitantly picks up the box, taking it inside her shop. Placing it along the counter, she pulls the silk white ribbon holding it together, opening the top as it looks to be cherry blossom petals within the box, scattering beneath the pink envelope, golden words trimmed atop of it. This was her sister's wedding invitation. 
She turns down the music within her shop as she absentmindedly begins to clean, other hand occupied as she reads the invitation. Then, her phone begins to ring. 
Ami. Just like clockwork. 
She holds the phone to her ear as she answers, continuing to read the invitation. The squeal on the other line was a usual greeting, something she was used to at this point. 
“Did you get it?”
Nozomi blinks at the envelope, “I did. Uh…Kyoto, Japan, Ami? Really?”
She could hear Ami giggling on the other line of the phone, her excitement evident, “Yes, really! Isn’t it perfect?” 
Nozomi continued to look at the envelope in hand, the pink cherry blossom petals filling out the box, “I…” she sighs, “It’s perfect. I love it.”
“No, no. Say what you need to say before you start holding in your anger and it turns into an even bigger thing.”
“I haven’t been to Japan in two years, Ami. Not since mom’s passing.”
She didn’t want to ruin the mood, knowing her sister wouldn’t let her comment make her upset. She just wanted to remind her. The mention of a place they once called home made something in her stomach turn, their mother being a fully black woman, their father being a full-blooded Japanese man. Their mom met him when traveling for school, and they fell in love immediately, raising their family there up until her sickness. They’d been back and forth between Kyoto and the states, but both of them were home to Nozomi. 
 They took traits from both parents. Ami looked more like their father, fair skinned, hair more pin-straight then anything, while Nozomi looked exactly like their mom, toffee skin, only having her fathers cheekbones, freckles and eyes. Every time she looked in the mirror, her heart ached.
“I know, I know…but,” Ami began to speak, her tone now more gentle than excited, “I just wanted to have the wedding somewhere special. Somewhere that’s special to us…”
Nozomi sighed once more, setting the invitation back amongst the cherry blossom petals. Her eyes traced over the golden writing, a small smile spreading across her lips, though her heart was still aching.
“I understand. Kyoto is an amazing place to have picked, mommy always loved it there. But it’s your man’s hometown too, huh? Did he have any say in this choice?”
She could hear her sister’s soft chuckle on the other line, her smile more than likely a soft one as she spoke, “Suguru thinks it’s a good idea, his family is already here, that’s less expenses on us. Although we still had to fly out our family, it was a smart choice.” 
There was a moment of silence before she could hear Ami speak once again, her tone holding a hint of concern, “Are you upset? I feel like you’re upset.”
Nozomi shakes her head, closing the top of the box as she says, “No, no. Not at all. I’m just…I didn’t think I’d be back there so soon. It’ll feel a little strange,” her smile is weak, trying to be lighthearted. Keyword—tried.
 She then asks, “Is uh…Is dad coming?”
Nozomi and her father’s relationship hadn’t been the best since her mother’s passing. After finding out he had been cheating on her while she was sick, Nozomi didn’t have anything to say to him. Ami kept in contact—that was enough for her.
A heavy silence fell on the other end of the line for a few moments, her sister’s voice finally breaking the uncomfortable silence between them.
“He is.” 
Nozomi could feel her heart begin to ache again, her smile disappearing. The topic of their father had always been a sore subject, though she knew it was better left alone. 
“Great,” she mutters, beginning to place the invitation politely back into the box, placing her other belongings in her purse as she was about to lock up her shop.
Her sister quickly replied on the other end of the line, holding a hint of panic, “Nozomi…don’t be like that. I know you have your feelings towards him, I get it. All I ask is that you at least try to be civil with him? For my wedding? I don’t want any drama.”
“I’d never do that to you, Ami,” she tells her, “Wanna go down your list of invites since you think I’m so barbaric?”
She could feel Ami rolling her eyes, “Don’t start your dramatics. Not when I’m about to tell you that I want you to be my maid of honor.” 
Nozomi halts, dropping her wallet into her purse as she glances out the window, “Me? Your maid of honor?”
A soft chuckle escaped her sister's lips, “Well duh, who else would it be? You’re my sissy-pooh. I’ve already got your dress, don’t worry, it’s not ugly. You’re excited, right? Please tell me you’re excited.”
Nozomi nods her head as if her sibling can see her, “Of course I’m excited. I just assumed that you would pick one of your friends.” 
“Oh, true. I mean, Kim will be there to help you—“
“Kim?” 
The entire conversation halts. It’s not that Nozomi was dramatic, however the name did bring an annoyance to her chest that she couldn’t shake. This was one of her sister's good friends, a friend of hers at one point—up until she slept with her man—the same man she was about to make things official with. It technically wasn’t cheating, but it was a fucked up gesture in her playbook.
“Yes, of course Kim is going to be there. I can’t not invite her to my wedding.”
“I’m aware,” Nozomi mutters more to herself, “But if you expect me to be butt-buddies wit ‘Kim-who-fucks-bitches-niggas’ Kim? Then it’ll be a cold day in hell, bridezilla. I’ll be cordial.” 
“Well you better keep that same energy when you see the man she fucked, cause Toji will be Suguru’s best man.” 
A pen could’ve dropped. 
The name echoed in her mind. She couldn’t lie to herself and say at one point she wasn’t endlessly in love with Toji. She had always been stubborn, not as emotional as her sister or willing to be in love the way Ami allowed herself to. But when the opportunity came with Toji, she made him work for it. He was just like her—stubborn, stern, aggressive—but he knew what he wanted, and that was her. He was the only person that could soften those walls, and just when she was ready to be committed to him, she found out that he hooked up with Kim, knowing that was also her friend, Kim also knowing that was her man. Both of them could go to hell.
Nozomi’s hand tightened around the phone, “Toji is his best man?”
Ami let out a breath as she spoke once more, her voice filled with reluctance, “I…yes. I know you both went through a rough patch—“ 
Nozomi could hear her sister’s voice soften even more, her voice taking a gentler tone, “I know things didn’t end well with you two, and I didn’t mention it before because I didn’t want you to say some bullshit about not going to my wedding.”
“Girl, bye. I love your ugly ass too much not to show up at your wedding,” she tries to joke away her anxiety, “Just send me pictures of all the bridesmaids dresses so I can know how to do my hair.”
Her sister’s giggles came through the phone as her squeal calmed down, her giddiness evident in her voice, “I’m so excited. Oh my God, everything is falling together! I already picked out the flowers…this is gonna be so much fun! Kyoto! Kyoto!” 
Nozomi could hear her sister begin to ramble on about her wedding preparations, it was cute to see her so excited and in love. But the back of her mind filled with the endless possibilities of this being a disaster. Her technical ex was in one room, while her ex-friend was in the other. She didn’t know who to swing on first. But this was her sister's wedding. It would be a perfect day for her. 
….Or an extremely hot day in Nozomi’s personal hell.
                      ‧₊˚❀༉‧₊˚.  𐦍༘⋆ ‧₊˚❀༉‧₊˚.  𐦍༘⋆
IT SEEMED LIKE THE NEXT COUPLE OF DAYS FLEW BY, and she was now arriving back in a place her parents called home at one point—Kyoto, Japan. The minute her feet landed in Osaka’s international airport, the crisp air made chills come down her spine. Memories of her mom rushed through mind like a collage, her smile, her laugh. Her throat went tight again. 
When she brought her focus back to finding her exit, a familiar face held up a sign that read, ‘NOZOMI—OMI.’ The nickname made her smile, pulling her suitcase as she ran up towards her older brother, Isamu, wrapping her arms around his neck as she crushed him into a hug. She wasn’t the affectionate type—but she also hadn't seen him since the funeral. She was the only sibling that now lived within the states, Ami staying in Kyoto with Suguru after the funeral, and Isamu living not too far from them. Nozomi needed the space and time to grieve. But maybe family was something she needed too. 
“Woah—hey, Omi’,” he clutched her, Nozomi digging her face into his shirt. Her eyes begin to well with tears, unable to stop herself as she squeezed him harder.
Her older brother wrapped his arms around her, pulling her closer to him as he held her, his arms holding her around the waist as he squeezed her back. She couldn’t see it from having her face buried in his chest, but his face held a soft, sad smile. 
When he spoke, his deep voice was soft, “You’re squeezing me pretty hard, Omi’. You’ scared imma’ disappear if you let me go?”
“Maybe,” she muffled softly, squeezing the tightest she possibly could’ve, “Just—a little longer, please.”
“I’m not going anywhere.” 
He was well aware of the emotions going through her mind. Not seeing any of her family in over two years was hard enough. But returning to their family’s hometown was even harder. 
She quickly wiped her eyes before actual tears could come, hearing his voice made her want to break down. Her and her older brother had always been close—she missed his comfort, especially with their sister too busy in her relationship.
“How are you?” She asks, “You’ been okay?”
“I’ve been good…keeping busy with work and everything that’s been happening around here.” 
There was a brief moment of silence between the two before he spoke again, his voice a little quieter than before, “And you?“
“I’m…good,” she lies, “I’ve just been working. The hair business is great, I’m just…excited to be back here and spend time with you and Ami. I didn’t expect her to want to do the wedding here, considering how hard she took mom’s passing.”
Isamu could tell she was lying, knowing her as well as he did. But he decided against saying anything about it, not wanting to push the topic. His mouth twisted into a small smile as he spoke, “I think it kind of brings her comfort. Being here and all. She says it makes her feel like a piece of mom is here with us.”
He placed a gentle hand against her shoulder, his eyes holding a sad look as he spoke, “How are you feeling about all this? About being here right now?”
That was the burning question. She could handle being here, but as far as speaking upon her mom—she wasn’t ready for that. 
She brushed off the urge to cry again, “It feels nice to be here in Kyoto. I feel at home. However, the rest of our family, Kim, Toji, and our father all in one room? Ami has lost her damn mind to think that would go over well. It’ll be one terrible ass Jerry Springer episode.”
“She’s definitely lost her damn mind,” He agreed, “She’s hellbent on it all being perfect and everyone playing nice.”
“Did you know Toji was the best man? Since when did him and ole’ boy become so close?” She questions, watching as he begins picking up her suitcase, following him out of the airport, “And don’t get to defending your little boyfriend either, I’m aware at how close y’all are,” she threatens, referring to him and Toji’s relationship.
As he loaded her luggage into the trunk of his car, he let out a gentle laugh as he closed the trunk and leaned against the back of it. 
His eyes rolled into his skull as he thought about how to reply, “Him and Suguru got cool overtime, I don’t know. They’ve known each other for a while. Ole boy got a name, dickhead. I’m not defending Toji. I could give you reasons to hate him, but I’m not going to feed into that.”
His eyes met hers, a sly look in his gaze as he spoke, “But you’re not exactly the angel that you think you are.”
“Wh—me?! The hell did I do?” 
He knew he triggered an extremely long ramble, trying to hold back his laugh as she got in the passengers seat, “I don’t fuck peoples men! That’s Kim’s slimy ass! And I’m not the one with the dick that fucked Kim! Toji’s a slimey-nasty-bitch too!”
A loud bark of laughter came from him as they were on their way to their old home, another place Nozomi wasn’t sure she could handle being at. He snickered quietly as they drove, “It’s called a joke, Omi’. Damn. Chill before you pop a blood vessel.”
He chuckled to himself again, “That was some fucked up shit though, not gon’ lie.”
“Not fucked up enough for you to still be cool with him, and definitely not fucked up enough for him to be Suguru’s best man,” Nozomi grumbled.
“I don’t expect you to play nice with him or Kim.”
“At least your expectations aren’t as high as our sisters. You should lower them to hell, considering I wanna rip Kim’s arm off her body and smack her around with it. Fuck that hoe.”
His voice held a hint of amusement, “You got a whole lot of pent up anger and aggression going on in that frame. You might wanna calm down and get that checked out.”
“Oh shut the fuck up,” she grumbled, leaning herself more into the window.
As they continued to drive, she got a good look of the city. It looked as if it never changed. The trees were still healthily green, buildings still posh, everything was always so put together. This was home for her father as well, it made her wonder where he was, but the thought of speaking to him came back to mind. She didn’t want to talk.
Isamu could see her looking out the window in her silent behavior. Even as a child, she didn’t talk as much. 
They soon pulled up to the familiar home, Isamu turning the car off before looking over to her, his voice soft as he spoke, “You ready?”
She didn’t look at him as she sighed, “I have to be.” 
When she stepped out of the car, she looked over the childhood home. A shock came to her face as it seemed to be entirely re-modeled, yet still the same. Dark brown wood on the rooftop of the white house, caramel timber holding the walls all together. Lanterns were all around, glowing the building in a beautiful sight. An aura felt carried around it, almost as if she were here.
Nozomi looked back to her brother as her eyes narrowed, “When did y’all uh…remodel the house?”
He walked alongside her towards the front door, pulling a set of keys out of his pocket as he replied, “Ami started getting it done. A wedding gift to herself, I guess.”
She nods her head, still looking up, keeping her eyes along the trees that hunched over the home. She then hears her brother ask, “You don’t like it?”
She shakes her head, “Nah, it’s perfect. Mom always wanted this place remodeled, dad always griped about wanting a traditional home. She would’ve loved it.”
He chuckled under his breath, the sound a little sad, “Yeah…she always wanted all the fancy things. She would’ve loved this home. Dad’s probably somewhere complaining about it as we speak.” 
Their father was old school, and wanted to maintain the traditional things that Japan had to offer.
“But who gives a fuck about his opinions,” she adds on beneath her breath.
Her attention was pulled as she heard a squeal coming from the top of the stairs. The house looked small on the outside, but on the inside it held about seven bedrooms, perfectly accompanied for a big family that was always usually within the house. The furniture was still pretty small, most of it low to the ground, similar to the beds within the bedrooms, more large, still being covered by Shoji screens, thankful that each room had space enough to muffle the sound next to the other. She was sorry for the room closest to the newlyweds.
When her attention came back, she was nearly tackled as Ami wrapped her arms around Nozomi’s neck, wrapping her legs around her as well as she locked her into a hug. Nozomi couldn’t help but laugh softly, holding her tightly as she said, “Hey, beautiful. I missed you.” 
She could feel her top beginning to dampen, a small laugh falling from her lips again as she said, “Ami, why are you crying?”
Ami’s voice was soft and shaky as she attempted to speak through her tears, “I missed you too. So much, it’s just—“ Her voice broke off into a sob as she buried her face in Nozomi’s neck, her small hands gripping tighter to her sister as she continued to sob in her arms.
“I’m here,” she sighed, pulling her closer, “I missed you more. Please stop crying, this is the shit we’re supposed to be doing on your wedding day.”
“I know. I know, I’m…I’m okay. I swear, I’m just…glad you’re here, Omi’.” 
“Is she crying again?” 
A voice came down the stairs, appearing to be Ami's fiancè. He was just as handsome as Nozomi remembered him, long dark hair pulled out of his face, black sweatshirt, muscles bulging through the top, a tattoo coursing along his arm. 
Nozomi said, “Yes, she is.”
“Babydoll, don’t cry,” he tells her sister, coming from behind and rubbing her shoulder.
Ami turned towards her fiancé, her eyes still watery from crying. He wrapped his arms around her waist, pulling her against his body, her face flushed a soft shade of pink as she smiled. 
Isamu clarified, “She’s fine. Just emotional.”
“Remember when you cried every-time it rained outside, because you thought God was sad at you for behaving badly at school? Yeah, shut up,” Ami insults their brother, both of them putting their middle fingers up to each other. 
Nozomi says to Suguru, “It’s good to see you. Are you happy about the wedding being in your hometown? Is your family excited?”
The soon-to-be husband chuckled quietly as he spoke, his arms still wrapped around Ami as he said, “Everyone’s excited as hell. I can’t wait to make her my wife.”
Nozomi nods her head with a smile. He was sweet. Another question comes to mind as they hear a pair of feet circling the corner from where the office was, a familiar face appearing in the kitchen. Here she was, the infamous Kim. 
Her olive toned skin was always perfect, her dark brown hair up in a sleek ponytail. Her outfits were always classy and expensive. She was a beautiful woman, Nozomi could admit that. She just wished that beauty ran deeper than the skin surface.
Kim’s eyes flicked to everyone in the room, before they landed on Nozomi. A sly smile spread across her lips as she crossed the room, her voice sickeningly sweet as she spoke, “Well…if it isn’t little Omi’.”
“Hey, Kim,” Nozomi gives her a wave, wanting to say nothing else after that. 
Ami then budges in, “That’s it, ‘Hey, Kim?’ You can do better than that.” 
Nozomi raises an eyebrow, “You’ want us to start scissoring or something?”
“Jesus!” Ami smacks her arm, her fiancè and brother laughing at her younger sister's mouth. 
Kim then shrugs, “It’s fine. It’s nice to see you. It’s been so long,” Kim gives her a scan of her entire body, “It seems nothing has changed.“
That comment has Nozomi narrow her eyes, and it seems as if the whole room is holding their breath. She could admit, her and Kim were completely different, and that might’ve tied into more of her insecurities when the man she thought was attracted to her, went after her friend behind her back.
….Did Kim seem more calm? Eloquent? Classy? Knew when to shut up? What was it? 
Even if Kim was better in some aspects, that didn’t mean she couldn’t get the shit smacked out of her. Before Nozomi could dig into her ass, a pair of footsteps interrupt her foul insults, and when her eyes lock on the dark boots that stomp down each step, her throat nearly goes numb.
Each stomp of the boots was like the ticking of a clock, time slowing as she took in the figure standing on the stairs. A feeling of dread settled in her stomach, her mouth going dry as her lips parted but no words came out. Isamu and Ami both looked at her, noting her reaction. 
Toji’s tall frame came down the steps, his expression as cold and apathetic as usual, not that it was abnormal. The man had always been so stoic, to the point that it felt as if there was no life behind his eyes. Or, as Ami had stated a million times before, “That man isn’t a person, he’s a block of ice.” 
The more he matured, the finer he got. They weren’t much different in age, him and her siblings being thirty while she was only twenty-seven, but that came with a price. She was always blamed for not being as participant or even being a hot head, and as soon as she crashed out, her age was the first reason for explanation. But Toji never saw her that way. At least, that’s how he made her feel. 
The dark shirt he wore clung to his broad frame, contrasting the Japanese words that swirled along his arm, creating an entire sleeve that went up to his shoulder, dancing up to the side of his neck, disappearing behind his ear and clothing. His onyx hair and eyebrows, always low each time he entered a room. He was scary, sexy, tempting. Damn him. 
“Took you long enough,” Suguru said to him, “‘Fuck were you doing up there, powdering your nose?”
The tall man huffs in amusement as he responds, his voice deep and smooth, “I had to make an important phone call, you annoying bastard.” 
His friend gives him a smirk, as if mocking his words, “Who were you calling?” 
Toji rolls his eyes as he replies, “None of your fuckin’ business.”
“Omi’s here!” Ami interrupted, almost as if it was something to panic over. 
The entire room locked eyes with her, as if waiting for some type of reaction. They didn’t know what to expect. It annoyed her. When his eyes locked on her, she felt like she wanted to melt into the ground. One thing he could expect from her— she was different from her siblings. She stood in a white baby tee, star shaped nipple piercings poking through the top. Her green cargo pants were slightly baggy, hair in individual braids, poking in between  wavy human hair. 
They’re bohemian goddess braids, jackass. Look it up, he remembers her telling him. 
Her glasses laid upon her freckled face, almost looking similar to an office siren, nose ring shining beneath the lights of the kitchen. Small tattoos roamed her frame, large hips never discreet in any clothing she wore. She was fucking gorgeous.
His eyes took her entire body in, her usual appearance making his eyes narrow faintly. It made the scar on his lip twitch. She looked good, too good. Her brown skin was always just as smooth, her body just as curvy and attractive as always. 
“Yeah,” he scans her up and down, “She is.”
Nozomi has the sudden urge to choke him. 
Her attitude comes first as she completely bypasses him, looking at her sister as she says, “Show me to my room?”
The air suddenly tensed as she avoided him like the plague, his eyes narrowing further at her behavior. Ami noticed it as well, and she quickly nodded. 
“Uh, yeah…follow me.” 
She gave her fiancé a kiss on the cheek before she began walking up the stairs, gesturing for Nozomi to follow her.
“Who else is gonna be staying here?” Nozomi asks, yet she gets no response. She felt a mood shift within her sister, and she knew a lecture was about to come. Once they make it in front of her door, Ami turns to her and quietly whispers, “Why did you do that?!” 
Nozomi tilts her head, “Do what?”
Ami looks at her as if it’s obvious, her tone laced with confusion as she whispers back, “Ignore Toji!” 
She glances down the hall to make sure no one can hear them as she continues to speak in a quiet tone, “You acted like he wasn’t even there!”
“You didn’t tell me he was gonna be here, Ami. Don’t act like you didn’t purposely do that,” Nozomi replies, crossing her arms over her chest.
Ami lets out a long sigh, placing her hands on her hips as she rolls her eyes, “Look, I’m sorry, but you’re both adults. I know you’re mad at him, but you can’t act like he doesn’t exist the entire weekend.”
“I actually can!” She exclaims back in a whisper, “He can fuck Kim in every Kama Sutra position known to man. I wouldn’t give a fuck if he stood there in a clown costume! I still wouldn’t have spoken.” 
“Are you done?” Ami blinks. 
Nozomi then pulls back with a sigh, realizing how she’s being. “I’m sorry. Maybe I should just get a hotel. I don’t wanna ruin your weekend.” 
Ami shakes her head as she replies, “You’re not getting a hotel. Just…can you please try to speak to Toji? Like…be mature about it? You didn’t work out, sure. That’s okay!”
Nozomi blinks, “It’s okay? It’s okay that I was practically in love with the bastard, was gonna let him break me out of my abstinence? Take my virginity? Then to find out he fucked Kim because what— her pussy was free? Fuck him!” 
Ami squints, “You’re still a virgin?”
“Ami!”
Ami looks surprised for a moment before her face becomes neutral again, her voice lowering, “Really? You and Toji never…?” 
She pauses for a moment, as if realizing something else after asking that question. Her eyes widen as she speaks, her tone now in a low whisper, “How? You literally told me you had sex before? Did you lie? Why would you lie to me?!”
“Because I didn’t want you to think I was a weirdo or something, you were all experienced and shit, sex was scary to me! Still is! And you think imma’ let that gorilla take my banana when he’s giving his for free?”
“You don’t have a banana,” Ami reminds. 
“You get my analogy, though. My point still stands, fuck him.”
Ami groans faintly, raising her hands up to rub her temples to calm her growing headache. She sighs as she speaks, “I know, I know…but I need you to be mature about it for one weekend. Please?!” 
“I will respectfully ignore him, unless you want me to be so sweet that I slice his throat in his sleep. And that’s being charitable.”
Ami looks horrified for a moment at her response, her eyes wide as she replies, “No! You will not do that! My wedding does not include any cutting of throats!”
Nozomi stands there with her arms crossed, similar to a child before she huffs, “Fine.” 
“Good! Now go change and get washed up. Matter of fact, you’ll be in the kitchen. With Toji. Helping him cook. Goodbye!”
Nozomi’s eyes go wide, “Ami!—“
Her sister makes an incredulous noise, silencing her before she walks away. She wants to throw a tantrum. Fuck.
After showering, she was now fully dressed in a gray long sleeve that hugged her upper body, matching sweats and her house slippers that wouldn’t ache her feet like her regular shoes did. Her braids were held up by a claw clip, no makeup residual on her face as she pressed her glasses up along her nose. She’d put in her contacts eventually. She was hoping that she would enter the kitchen first, but as she saw Toji standing there in a black wife beater and sweats, silver jewelry clinking along his wrist, she held her breath. She held back the roll in her eyes as she scanned the countertop to see all the prepped food, not knowing where to start. Maybe this was the time to speak. 
Thankfully, she can hear his deep, gruff voice as she seems to be on the phone, speaking in Japanese. She understood most of it, but she didn’t care enough to listen to what he had to say. She took that as her opportunity to scan over the small box in the middle of the island, holding what looked to be the recipe for dinner tonight.
Toji’s eyes were on her the moment she entered the room, watching her movements as she took her time scanning the countertop, analyzing the ingredients and prepped food in front of her. He could admit, she looked as attractive as she did the first day he met her. Her skin was still smooth, hair braided up, tattoos exposed for him to admire beneath the gray clothing she adorned. Her glasses perched on her nose, making her look naturally sexy. Damn her.
She frowns down at the recipes, realizing how familiar they sound. She takes this moment to finally speak to him, never looking up from the counter as she asks, “Did Ami give these to you?”
He was surprised she'd actually spoken, even if it was to acknowledge the recipe, and not him. His eyes scanned her, noting the way her body looked in her current clothing, and how she was still somehow just as attractive in something as simple as sweats.
“Yeah, she did.”
“I’m assuming she has you cooking everything this weekend,” she comments, eyes glancing up at him.
Toji lets out a huff, and his deep voice responds to her question, “Not everything, but I am cooking.” 
He returns her stare, gray eyes scanning her face. He could tell she was bothered just by being in the room with him, but she was holding up. 
“So what did you need help with, then?” She questions, “It looks like you have everything under control.”
Something in him became immensely irritated at how she was being. He knew that she was still upset with him, but for the sake of her sister's wedding, he hoped she would put her feelings to the side. Clearly not. 
“I’m good. You can go,” he tells her, sharpness in his tone. 
She turns to leave the kitchen, and when he sees that she’s actually leaving, he becomes pissed off. 
“You’re gonna do this bullshit all weekend?”
Nozomi halts, turning towards him with a raised eyebrow. She replies, “Call it what you want, Fushiguro.”
“What, you don’t call me Toji anymore?” He snips, a sharp tongue being one of their similarities when they annoyed each other.
“Is that what you want?” 
“I want you to stop acting like a fuckin’ child.”
That makes both her eyebrows raise as she replies with an amused huff, “Huh. A child. Well how about I get back to my playground? Kim can come assist you.”
“Stop acting like a fuckin’ brat. Don’t act like you don’t feel something from seeing me.”
“Do you think you’re a prize? What did you think? That I was gonna be happy to see you? Jump for joy? Fuck you on this countertop? Don’t be fucking stupid. Do you need help in the kitchen or not? Cause that’s really all that needs to be said between us. I was doing my sister a favor by coming in here,” she snaps, anger seeping through her that she hadn’t felt in years.
“Don’t be a smart ass. I know that you’re pissed. I get that. But the weekend has barely started, and it’s already irritating dealing with your childish bullshit.”
“Then leave me the fuck alone, Fushiguro! I was fine before you said anything to me. I’m not gonna ruin my sister's wedding by bringing my own issues with you into that. I was fine before, I will be fine.” 
When she goes to turn, she feels him lock his hand around her wrist, her other hand close enough to the kitchen counter as she warns, “My hand is seconds away from a knife. Let go of me.”
For a split moment, he wonders if she’d actually stab him. She might. He decides to test that thought and refuses to listen to her, not letting go of her wrist.
“Maybe that’ll show me that you actually give a fuck to have a conversation,” he sharply replies.
“I don’t,” she promises. 
Damn, this woman. When he goes to pull her closer, the door to the kitchen swings open, the familiar ponytail appearing that almost makes Nozomi actually want to go for the knife on the counter. Kim. If she swung forward enough, she’d slice both of them.
The sight of Kim was both a good and bad thing. It was good because the brunette would act as a buffer between the two. It was bad because it would stop him from talking to Nozomi alone, since he was unable to do so outside of the kitchen. 
Kim asks, “You guys need help? Ami told me to come assist.”
“Of course she did,” Nozomi replies, her tongue on fire, “You got it. He seems to prefer you anyway.” 
She finally snatches herself away from him, making her way out of the kitchen without saying anything else. She barely acknowledges Kim, wanting to spit on her from how pissed she was. Fuck both of them.
Toji is almost tempted to grab her wrist again and snatch her back. His eyes watch her storm out in anger, and he turns his glare to Kim, who has no idea what the hell was going on. 
She looks to Toji, blowing out a breath as she mutters, “Drama Queen,” before shaking her head, “C’mon, I’ll help you finish. I’m starving.”
Nozomi was so upset that she was shaking. She didn’t think that she would care that much about seeing him or even speaking to him, but as soon as they went back and forth, all her feelings came erupting like vomit, and she didn’t know how to deal with them. She might’ve actually hurt him had she stayed in the kitchen. When she went back into her room, she kicked her shoes off, laying within the bed as she pressed her face into the sheets. She could feel her hot tears brimming into the comforter, wishing she wouldn’t cry when she was pissed off. 
She feels as if she’s laying there for an eternity. But as she hears her door slide open, she knows it’s her older sister. 
She mutters, “Not now, Ami. Please.”
She quietly closes the door behind her and makes her way to Nozomi, lowering onto the mattress as she sits down beside her. Ami gently places a hand on her back as she speaks, her tone soft, “You alright?”
It’s like the question had something almost shatter inside of her. She wraps her arms around the pillow in front of her, digging her face into it as she cries softly, “I fucking hate him.”
“You don’t hate him.”
“I know,” she replied, voice trembling. She didn’t hate him. In fact, seeing him again, she missed him so much. Everything hit her, her doubts, her insecurities. It all stood in between him and her sister's friend. 
“I feel so stupid. I’m stupid,”  she repeats, “Crying over a nigga that dropped me because I wasn’t ready to sleep with him.” 
“That’s not what it was about, Omi’,” her sister tries to counter.
Nozomi then sits up, “Then what was it, Ami? I know it’s because she’s prettier, thinner, smarter. More money. I just—“ 
She takes in a breath, trying to wipe her red face, “I just wish it didn’t hurt that bad. That she didn’t make me feel worse about it.”
Ami’s heart hurt as her sister voiced the thoughts that had been tormenting her. The insecurities and the pain that Toji had caused. Her sister had spent two years tormenting herself as if it was her fault.  
Ami gently takes her hand to squeeze, her eyes meeting with hers firmly, “You are so so stupid if you think that’s the only reason he fell for you. You’re beautiful and intelligent and talented. He didn’t break up with you because someone was better than you. And she’s not that.” 
“Then what?” Her glossy eyes glance up at her, “How am I supposed to feel when she’s here? Being with him?”
“Toji is a man, and men are idiots. That’s the only explanation for that. Look, Kim is just here as a friend for me. I don’t want you to think I’m trying to make you upset, it was wrong what she did. I can talk to her, make sure she doesn’t make you uncomfortable. But I need you to focus on yourself. Focus on the wedding. This weekend is a celebration, alright? I don’t want you making yourself feel shitty for that idiot.”
Nozomi sighs, finally feeling herself calm down. She was right. This was one weekend and she’d never have to see him again. It was gonna be a struggle, but she was tough. She wipes her eyes as she exhales, “You don’t need to talk to her. I’m fine. Kim is always gonna be Kim. The bitch has artistic intelligence, so I know she’s making your wedding a fairytale. I want that for you. I’ll be fine. As far as Toji, I’ll…I’m okay,” she finalizes, “I’m sorry. I don’t wanna ruin your night.”
Ami shakes her head gently, a kind smile on her face as she replies, “You could never ruin my night. I’d smack you if you did. I’m happy you’re here, it means the world to me.”
She gently reaches out to give Nozomi’s shoulder a light squeeze as she adds, “Just try to enjoy yourself, alright? You don’t have to talk to Toji, but you don’t have to be rude either. I don’t want you two arguing all weekend. I’m gonna go get dinner. I can bring you a plate up?”
Nozomi shakes her head, “I’ll come eat with everyone. Just need to clean my face up. Go enjoy your food.” 
She hesitates, wrapping her arms around her sister's neck as she mutters, “Love you.”
Ami’s heart warms when she hugs her. She returns the embrace, smiling gently as she responds, “I love you too. Always.” 
When she makes it downstairs, everyone is around the table, seated along the floor as they eat and talk amongst each other. She fell back into her solitude, grateful that no one questioned her silence. She’d give a brief glance at Toji when he wasn’t looking, watching as he spoke to his best friend, laughed, joked, a bit of normalcy that she couldn’t help but miss about him. She might’ve been stubborn, but she refused to get hurt again. She also couldn’t stop thinking about the fact that they used her mother’s recipes to cook the food, an entirely different reason why she felt so down. She wouldn’t have allowed her to cry over Toji. She would’ve called him a bastard and laughed in his face.
Toji feels her eyes on him. 
Throughout the night, he finds himself occasionally stealing glances in her direction. He can’t help it, she’s right there and it’s driving him mad. She’s still so damn beautiful.
As everyone makes small talk, and Kim tells a joke to crack some laughs, Toji’s eyes remain fixated on Nozomi. Her expression remains neutral, but he can see that she’s faking a calm composure. He wished she had giggled at his jokes the way she used to, he just wanted to feel something different from her. He missed that normalcy as well.
Nozomi barely touched her food, feeling her stomach growling as she made it back to bed that night. She couldn’t sleep. If it wasn’t her thoughts running amuck, it was definitely the unfortunate muffled sounds of her sister and her fiancè…enjoying their time together. 
She stands from the bed as she slides her door open, hoping her ears would fall off as she passes by their room, making her way towards the kitchen. She passes Kim’s room as well, and when she hears that Kim also seems to be enjoying herself, accompanied by a sound of masculine grunting, she can feel her palms shaking. 
“That fucking bastard,” she mutters. 
That ruins her entire appetite. Instead of her midnight snack, it sends her right back to bed. As she goes back to her door, she notices an object on the ground. She frowns beneath the darkness, leaning down as she sees an orchid laid along the wood. She sighs, knowing her brother had probably placed it there, a habit he had with both of his sisters if he was apologetic, trying to make them feel better. She appreciated it. She took the flower in her room and closed the door, attempting to get some sleep for the rest of the night. 
When the next morning came, she was greeted downstairs by everyone. Her sister was wrapped under her fiancè’s arms as she held a coffee mug close to her face, giggling as he talked within her ear.
Kim was in the kitchen making herself tea, talking to Nozomi’s brother, while Toji was engrossed within his phone, silent in an unusual manner. 
She rubbed her eyes as she tiredly greeted everyone, “Morning.”
Everyone replied with their own greeting, smiles and kind words exchanged between the group. Well, except for Toji, who was uncharacteristically silent.
He slowly looked up, his eyes locked on her as a pang of irritation spiked through him. She was wearing a tank top paired with tight boy shorts. Toji couldn’t tear his eyes away from the way her skin was on display, or the way her shorts hugged her hips. He was forced to look away, his jaw tense as he silently stared out the window instead.
“How’d you sleep?” Ami asks, “Want me to make you some tea?”
Nozomi shakes her head, “Slept okay. On account of you two love birds, y’all make me absolutely sick.”
“Nah, for real. Imma’ have to bleach my ears,” her brother pipes in, both older siblings once again throwing middle fingers to each other. 
“Oh, fuck off. This is my weekend! And this is my man, my man, my man!” 
Everyone laughs her off, knowing how in love she was with her fiancè. They couldn’t admit it, but it was adorable. 
Ami takes a sip of her tea as she says, “So, what’s on everyone’s agenda before the rehearsal dinner tonight?”
“I’m gonna head to the restaurant that’s catering the wedding, make sure your menus are just the way you wanted them and the food is perfect, beautiful bride,” Kim tells her, nudging her friend's leg with a smile. 
Nozomi figured that as the maid of honor these things would be her job, but if Kim wanted to kiss her sister's ass, she wasn’t going to stop her. 
“Imma’ go with her, it’ll give me a chance to get out of the house,” Isamu adds. 
“Great. We’ll be checking out the venue one more time, making sure they decorated it just how I imagined it—and from all the pictures I framed off Pinterest. If not, I will be going bridezilla on they ass. Anyways, my crew, rolling out!” 
As everyone disperses from the seating area, Nozomi notices as Toji is still there, interest deep within his phone. At least, pretending to be. She can’t read him. However, she can stare at him. The way he looks within this onyx wife-beater, she could lick him. The ink on his skin swirls along his arm, broad frame nearly wanting to break the small chair he sits in. 
Her attention is pulled away when she hears him ask, “You’ going out today?”
She blinks, “Huh?” 
Toji didn’t miss anything. He saw her staring from his peripheral, watching the way her eyes had roamed all along him. 
His eyes were locked on her now as he repeated, “I asked if you were going out today.”
“Oh, uh—“ she thinks about it, hearing her stomach deeply grumbling. She realized she hadn't had a full meal since she got on the flight to Japan. 
“Yeah—Imma’ head to this little restaurant my mom used to take us to,” she briefly replies, proud of herself for being cordial enough, especially after last night. At this point, she didn’t give a fuck about what he had going on. 
“Oishii?” he asks. 
She narrows her eyes a bit, “Yeah. How’d you know?” 
“Isamu mentioned it. I told him that place burnt down a couple months after your mom passed.”
“What?” She exclaims, “What the hell? Fuck, who was gonna tell me? That was the only place I really enjoyed.”
Toji can’t help but smirk at the surprise she expressed. He replies, “Been closed up for a while now,” with a shrug, “Damn shame. It was good.” 
He leans back, Nozomi knocking her eyes down as he spreads his knees, seated in a position he usually relaxed in if he wanted her to sit on his lap. It made her throat dry. 
“There’s other places to choose from. I know one. I’ll take you there.” 
She shakes her head, “That’s not necessary—“
“Get dressed.” 
His word was his bond, it always made her clutch her lips together. He was already standing, already walking away. He was never asking. With that, she pressed her lips together, a small groan falling from her mouth as she made her way back to her bedroom to put on some clothes.
He sat within his room for a while as he waited for her, knowing she would be a minute as she did her full routine. It annoyed him that he remembered that. 
He eventually stood across the door from her room, knowing she’d be out soon. When she opened it, she flew past him to get a look at herself in the full body mirror down the hall. She adjusted the tightly fitted yellow sundress she wore, a matching headband that pulled her braids out of her face, edges perfectly sculpted. She wore her contacts today, able to see the eyes that she carried from her father. She looked more stunning each time he saw her. 
She looked up to him as she pulled her white sandals on her feet, going back into the room for her purse as her soft voice asked, “Ready?”
Toji could have eaten her in this outfit, watching as she walked past him, catching her body in the mirror as she turned. The dress hugged her curves perfectly, showing off each and every bit of her he ached to touch. 
He nods in response, his voice low as he replies, “Let’s go.”
It wasn’t as cold as it usually was in Kyoto, the weather perfect for a wedding. She enjoyed being able to walk rather than drive everywhere, needing a car back in the states. Their walk was quiet, Nozomi enjoying the trees, nature, the colorful buildings. She walks beside him for a while, watching as the cars bustle on the street beside her. 
“Uh…do you know where we’re going?” She questions him, looking to the side of herself.
Toji’s own gaze was also fixated, watching her from the corner of his eye, studying the small habits he missed, the way she observed her surroundings so intently. The way her ass looked in this dress. His hands remained in his pockets, her question earning a glance as he looked down at her.
“You askin’ if I’m taking you to some secluded area where I’m gonna’ chop you up or something?” 
His voice is low in humor, a smirk on his lips as he continues to guide her. “Be patient.”
She sighs, crossing her arms behind herself as she holds her purse in her hand, “I don’t like surprises.”
“I know that, Nozomi.” 
“I would hope the food at this place is good, my mom was picky, so it makes me picky. What if it’s nasty? I’m hungry. I’ll be sad if it’s gross,” she banters.
“You’re whining a lot today, I see.” 
“I’m just curious,” she shrugs, “Fine. I’ll shut up.” 
Toji’s eyes narrow as he notices the way cars fly past as she continues on the sidewalk, something in him annoyed with how quickly they drive by. 
“Don’t. Keep talking to me,” he says, his movement swift as he grips her by her hip, gently pulling her on the inside of the sidewalk as he now walks where the cars pass, “You’ still working on your Japanese?” 
The movement was so quick that the chill down her spine was even quicker, her entire body tingling at his rough touch. 
She nearly loses focus of his question as she swallows, “Um—still pretty shit at it, actually.”
“You’re not trying enough,” his tone low, “‘Can’t speak the language but you’ve lived here. You are Japanese.” 
“Half,” she reminds, “My dad always said that I didn’t ‘look the part’ anyways. Ami always fit for him, her Japanese is award worthy.”
“I’m not talking about looks,” he mutters, rolling his eyes, “I’m talking about heritage. You’re still half, that means something. Your father should have been proud to know you speak his language. It’s annoying hearing you struggle.”
“Then how about you teach me, Mr. I know Everything? I understand you perfectly fine! That should count for something,” she begins to walk a little faster, hips twisting as she becomes slightly agitated with him.
Toji follows after her, his own stride matching as he easily keeps up. He scoffs, shaking his head at her words as he replies, “You don’t understand half the shit I tell you. You’ make this face when you’re confused, it’s cute.”
“Whatever,” Nozomi mutters, now actually irritated.
 As they continue to walk, she notices a small boutique, the dark purple font on the sign above bringing her instant nostalgia. She gasps, “Oh my god, this is the boutique my mom used to take me and Ami too! I can’t believe it’s still here…” 
She can’t help it, but she’s already pulling on the door handle, making her way inside in full curiosity.
Upon entering, she’s met with various traditional kimonos and dresses, a familiar scent filling her senses. Toji is immediately behind her, observing the entire shop as she takes it in. He can already tell that the nostalgia is overwhelming, watching as she walks around the place, her hands gently touching some of the dresses.
She looks along the wall of the shop, seeing all the Sanrio theme plushies and characters, blossoming different colors within her eyes. She felt like a child all over again. She nearly gives herself an asthma attack when she sees a particular plushie—she thought she was gonna faint. 
“Holy shit,” she mutters, pointing upwards, “You see that one? This is a Hello Kitty collectible,” she describes. His eyes follow up to what looks to be a toffee complexioned Hello Kitty, wearing a pink and red Kimono, a matching pink flower within its head. It was the biggest one of all, nearly as big as Nozomi’s entire body. 
“I literally cried all day because my mom wouldn’t buy it for me. She refused because Ami wanted one that looked like her, and because they didn’t have a collectible in her skin tone, my mom didn’t want her to feel left out. So neither of us got anything. The fact that it’s still here is insane.” 
She comes close to it, trying to squint at the price tag on its side as she mutters, “Wonder how much it is…”
“Wanna ask?” Toji questions. 
She turns with a frown, “I can ask, thank you.” 
She surprises him a bit as her tone changes, inquiring the price of the plushie as she asks within his native tongue. He couldn’t understand what she meant when she said her Japanese was shit, she sounded incredibly normal to him. Sexy, even. He wanted to hear her speak it again. 
She blinks as the woman responds, looking to Toji as she repeats back in English, “Thirty-Eight thousand yen? What is that in American dollars?”
“Shit is like three hundred dollars,” Toji replies back to her, watching as her jaw nearly drops.
“Oh hell, I don’t want it that bad,” she sighs, “Ugh. It’s so cute. My pockets will cry. Oh well.” 
She says thank you to the woman, “Let me look at these dresses for a second, then we can go,” her shoulders are a bit more slump as she searches the rest of the store, almost feeling defeated. 
As she continued to look around, her attention was along a dark brown Kimono, a pair of colors she’d never seen before. She doesn’t hear Toji speak to the woman, pointing towards the wall of plushies. She only ever realizes what he’s doing when the woman pulls down the large collectible she wanted, bringing it to the register. 
“What are you doing?” She questions from the other side of the store, nearly tripping as she makes her way back to him.
Toji can tell by her expression that she had completely given up on the possibility of leaving with that stupid doll. It was endearing, seeing the disappointment in her eyes. 
“Buying this stupid ass doll.”
He begins reaching for his wallet, pulling the wad of cash out as her eyes widen, placing her hand over his to stop him as she awkwardly speaks towards the woman, telling her not to worry about it, “No, you are not buying me that.”
Toji glances over at her as she speaks, smacking his lips at her. The woman behind the cash register pauses for a moment, looking between the two of them. 
“Didn’t you just want this shit two seconds ago?” 
Nozomi’s eyebrows furrow, “Yes—“
“So shut up.” 
When she goes to protest, the look he gives her makes her hands halt, pressing her lips together as she puts her hands behind her back. 
The older lady giggles, Nozomi understanding her as she asks if she wants a gift bag. Toji shakes his head, “She’ll hold it.” 
When he looks back to see her still standing with a perplexed expression, still shocked that he even bought it, he snaps her out of her trance as he says, “Take the damn doll from her before I choke you with it.” 
She smacks her lips now, politely thanking the woman as she has to wrap both arms around the plushie, it being a little heavy. She doesn’t know how to feel, but as he grumpily waits for the receipt, a small smile comes to her face.
When they make it to the restaurant, the lights on the streets begin to come on, the buildings and billboards bright to her eyes. She missed this feeling, almost like a child feeling Christmas air. Her plushie sits beside her in its own individual chair, Toji sitting across from her as he pulls a cigarette from his pocket, swiftly igniting it as they wait for someone to take their order. Nozomi looks down at the menu, not sure where to take the conversation. 
They’d been getting along, it was no harm in that. She couldn’t be a bitch after he spent three-hundred dollars on something she’d always wanted. 
She exhales as she looks around the crowded restaurant, looking back to him as she begins, “So…do you still live in the states, or did you move back here?”
Toji’s dark eyes remained on her while she looked around at the restaurant, his gaze always observant. He noticed how her eyes seemed to brighten at the view outside, how her mood completely changed after getting her silly doll. 
He takes a puff of his cigarette before replying, “Moved back home. Got sick of it.” 
“Sick of it? I thought you liked New York. I thought you enjoyed being a body-guard, kicking people's asses and getting paid for it,” she mentions, giving a polite smile to the man that hands her the drink she ordered.
Toji’s eyes follow her polite smile before watching her take a sip, replying as he rests an arm lazily along the back of the booth. 
“I did enjoy it. I just don’t like the people out there. New Yorkers are a pain in the ass,” he scoffs before puffing his cigarette again, continuing, “Why do it there when I can kick people's asses here and still get paid for it?”
That makes a small laugh come from her, something he hadn’t heard in a long time. She crosses her leg, leaning back within the seat as she questions, “When did you and Suguru become so close?” 
Toji’s eyes watch her body shift, taking another pull from his cigarette as her question registers in his head. 
“I’ve known the bastard since high school, but we got closer once I moved back. I thought it was funny he fell in love with your other half,” he pauses, looking at her with a smirk, “He’s a big ass softie now. Whipped, even.”
That makes her eyebrow raise, “So your perception of someone in love is being whipped, huh? Makes sense.”
Toji narrows his eyes at her snarky response, taking a moment to reply, “You’ still need me to choke you with your friend over there? I hope she isn’t ordering too, I’m good on money, but that’s pushing it.” 
She rolls her eyes as he adds with a serious tone, “And I didn’t say that. A man should respect his woman, I’ve just never seen him this way.”
“Well I think it’s adorable. Love should be all mushy and gross, that’s how you know it’s genuine. Makes me wonder what I’m doing wrong,” she admits, swirling her straw around in her cup, “I’m really happy for her.”
Toji’s expression doesn’t change as she responds, his cigarette hanging idly between his lips as his arm is still resting along the booth. 
He looks at her, really looks at her, a thought coming to his mind as he suddenly responds, “You’re not doing anything wrong.” 
He pauses, taking another pull before he changes the subject, “You spoke to your dad?”
That question almost startles her brain. She thought for a second that she could forget he’d be at the rehearsal dinner. She hadn’t seen him in two years. She kneels into the menu as she tries to deflect, “How do I tell the waiter I want this?”
Toji sees right through her, knowing exactly what she’s trying to do. He’s observant of a lot of her tendencies. He knows she’s avoiding talking about her father, and knows that she’s trying to forget. 
He’s not going to let her. 
“Show me what you want,” he mutters gruffly, nodding to the menu in her hand.
“Mmm, maybe I’ll just get ramen,” she tries to distract him. 
He eyes her as he suggests, “You can try the Sashimi.”
She scrunches up her nose, “I don’t think I’m in the mood for raw fish. No thank you.”
“You eat sushi all the time, baby. The fish is just cut differently,” he explains, ignoring the way she rolls her eyes.
He puffs his cigarette before speaking again, “Stop avoiding the subject and answer my question. Did you call him yet?”
She pulls back, letting him have the menu as she says, “I’ll see him at the rehearsal dinner. No need to call.”
“Bullshit,” he mutters, tossing the menu to the side, “He’s your father, of course you should call him.” Toji puts out his cigarette, now giving her his full attention.
“Oh hell, here you go with your family matters bullshit. I don’t need a therapy session. You don’t talk to your family either, Fushiguro,” she points out.
Toji’s expression drops at her mention of his family, something shifting in his eyes now. 
“Not the same thing, you know that.”
“Maybe,” she shrugs, “What am I supposed to say? Hey, thanks for cheating on my mom while she was sick, and then only being there to agree on pulling the plug on her? How’s your new bitch? Oh, did you figure out a tie for the wedding?” She tilts her head, sarcasm laced in her voice.
“Maybe say all that shit, it’s better than nothing. He still loves you.”
“Yeah, because I’m his daughter. Plus—it’s not my wedding, Dr. Phil.  It’s Ami’s and he loves her to death. Would do anything for her, she’s always been Daddy’s little girl,” she flatly says, “This isn’t about me.”
He shakes his head as he begins, “You don’t have to take the backseat to everything or be a doormat all the time. This is about you.” 
He moves closer, “It doesn’t matter who’s getting married. He’s your family, too. You think he doesn’t notice that you avoid him?”
“The phone is a two way street, if he wanted to speak to me that badly, he would’ve,” she crosses her arms over her chest, becoming uncomfortable with the conversation.
“Yeah, it’s a two way street. So why haven’t you called him in the entire two years? It goes both ways.”
“Because he hasn’t called me.” 
“So it’s a competition now?” 
“Fushiguro,” she warns.
Toji continues to glare her down, not backing off. 
“It’s not a competition. I’m just trying to understand your logic, or lack of,” he explains, “You keep saying the phone is a two way street. You haven’t called him either, but are pissed at him for not calling you, shit is ass-backwards.”
Her leg begins shaking beneath the table, not necessarily upset with him. The overall topic has her frustrated. Her attention is drawn back to him when Toji sees the tension in her movements, knowing that his persistent questions have stressed her. He grips her ankle gently to stop her from moving, his large hand wrapping completely around it as he places her leg on his lap. 
“All I’m trying to say is you should talk to him,” he says again, the firmness in his voice fading.
When she realizes that she’s only making herself upset, she stops. She had to face her father, and it would be happening tonight. It didn’t have to be a bad interaction, she just wished he never made the decisions he did.
 She looks down at the table as she then admits, “I love my father. But I hate what he did to our family.”
A small silence comes between them, his hand still loosely holding her ankle. 
“You don’t have to forgive him,” he finally says, “But don’t forget that he loves you. Even with his shitty decisions.”
She looks up at him, realizing his sincerity. The silence is filled as the waitress comes back, sitting down her bowl of ramen, also sitting down a plate of perfectly placed fish—raw, as she mentioned she didn’t like. 
Her arms are still holding onto her chest, realizing that for the sake of this weekend, maybe she needed to make a change. She sits up as she reaches for the chopsticks, dipping a piece of the fish into the soy sauce and popping it into her mouth. She chewed for a moment before tilting her head, “Seems like you don’t always have bad taste.”
He’s glad that she was able to open up a little bit, to talk about her family. As annoying as it was, he was beginning to worry about how she would deal with tonight. 
“See? If you weren’t so hard headed, shit would be much easier for you.” 
“Yeah, yeah. Stop talking to me.”
“Want me to feed you?—“ 
“Not too much, Fushiguro. I’m being nice to your ass right now.” 
“My bad.” 
She was afraid that their time together would be awkward, but it was the complete opposite. It was extremely natural, maybe even a little romantic. It was unfortunately creating that flipping feeling in her stomach. The one she felt if he even spoke to her, catered to her, adorned her—made her feel like she was his again. She pushed down that rush of emotions as they exited the restaurant, seeing the text from Isamu on Toji’s phone to let them know they needed to be on time to the rehearsal dinner. 
“Shit,” she mutters, “We might be late. Is there a quicker way to get back to our place from here?”
“Down this hill,” he refers, holding the large plushie in his own arm as she was too tired to carry it. 
As they continue walking, she realizes he refers to the road with a large downward path as a “hill,” and it makes her laugh to herself.
As they begin making their way down the lit up street, something within her feels giddy, and she can’t help herself. 
“Race you!” 
She’s already beelining down the road. Her body zigzags on the street as she takes off. She knew there was a small competitive bone in his body, no words as she heard his footsteps already booming behind her. Nozomi shrieks into giggles as he grips her up by her bottom half, throwing her over his shoulder as he continues running. 
She was happy and laughing, a sound he enjoyed hearing. He never wanted it to stop.
When he slowed down and was now walking, she huffed over his shoulder as she strained, “I guess this is better than walking,” gripping for her plushie to hold within the air.
Toji chuckled to himself as he felt her squirm in his hold, holding her tight so she wouldn’t fall, “You’re just upset that I always win,” he muttered with a grin, feeling her arms reaching for the plushie, pulling her up a bit so she could hold it.
Her eyes take sight of the city, another pang to her heart. She missed it here. It brought back so many memories within her childhood. Her eyes halt as she catches sight of a bridge farther down, patting his back as she says, “Hold on,” feeling as he places her down. 
She fixes her dress and hair as she catches her breath, looking over the bridge as she sees a rare sight—A cherry blossom tree. 
“They’re so pretty at night,” she sighs, “I’d kill for these in the states.”
Toji watches her as she takes in the scenery, now standing beside her. 
“I didn’t realize how much you missed Japan.” 
He looks out over the river, agreeing with her statement, “Yeah… shit is nice to look at, always has been.” 
It was then that Toji seen her shiver, his eyes glancing down as she attempted to cover her arms. 
“You cold?”
“I didn’t realize it’d be cold tonight, it was pretty warm earlier,” she says, a shiver exhaling from her mouth, “I’m fine.”
“Yeah, no. You’re not.” 
Toji slips off his leather jacket, placing it around her shoulders as he murmurs, “Stubborn ass.”
She huffs out a laugh, seeing her warm breath in the air. She’s now turned towards him as he pulls the jacket to cover her body, her head tilted up to stare in his face, his frame hovering over hers. It was at this moment that she saw him—she hadn’t looked at him this way in a while.
He meets her gaze, his face much closer to hers than just a few seconds prior. The air between them has changed, the shift is palpable. Toji watches as she shudders again, the movement making her body press closer against him. The sight makes him feel protective.
“Toji, I—“
“I’m sorry.” 
She frowns, her eyebrows coming over her eyes as she’s confused. Her stomach tumbled at his sudden apology, and she wanted to beg that it wasn’t for their past. 
“I fucked up, Nozomi. I should’ve never hurt you the way I did.” 
This is the conversation she’d been avoiding. Her throat tightens. 
“Toji…”
Toji sees the mix of emotions in her expression, his own heart feeling heavy as he continues to look in her eyes. 
“I was a dumbass. I know that. I never should have—“ he pauses, feeling his throat constrict from the emotions now bubbling up, “Never should have done what I did, and I know my actions will never undo the pain I caused.” He sighs, voice lowering, “I just need you to know that you mean a lot to me. That never changed.”
She’s unsure of how to feel. He was always too stoic for his own good, never able to say his feelings, and here he was—completely transparent and vulnerable. She couldn’t keep fighting how she felt. She missed him. She wanted to forgive him. 
Toji’s phone then buzzes. Her eyes lowered to see KIM appear on the screen. The message read, ‘Where are you? Hurry back for dinner! It’s boring here without you.’
That was the icing on the cake. It brought back the anger she felt, why she was pissed with him in the first place. All her emotions went sinking into the back of her mind. 
She gives a humorless laugh, removing his jacket and handing it to him as she says, “That must’ve meant something to you too,” referring to his text. 
She begins walking, regardless of how cold she is, “C’mon. They’re looking for us.”
He frowns as her attitude takes a 180 turn, the moment of vulnerability gone as she hands him back his jacket.  Fuck. 
“Nozomi—“
But it’s too late, she’s already walking farther into the night. That was the end of the conversation. For now, at least.
When they arrive back at the house, she feels completely empty. The moment she opened up to him, possibly ready to have a conversation and move forward, it was all ruined. She didn’t know who to blame. Her stubbornness, his idiocy, or the bitch her sister called a friend. She was trying to keep it cute, but even this was too cute for her. 
Her look for the night was more simple this time, a halter top dress, doing her makeup softer than she usually would, her sister requesting her bridal party wear white. Her golden heels with white orchids along the top, braids swimming down to her lower back—feeling pretty might’ve made her feel better for the night to come. 
She came downstairs with everyone else, more to herself this time, especially when she saw Kim talking to Toji in the corner. His black button up was similar to her brothers, silver watch along his wrist and chain matching the jewelry he wore along his neck. 
Her attention was caught by her sister who pulled her arm for her attention as she asked, “You were damn near late, where have you been?” 
“I was just running errands, I’m sorry.”
Ami looks her up and down, “You missed the fitting for your dress. Kim has been calling you all day!”
“What?” She frowns, “I never got any calls from Kim. Why didn’t you just call me?”
“I didn’t have my phone on me, I was fitting for my dress too. It’s fine, let’s just hope you fit your dress.” 
She knew Ami, seeing she was trying not to be upset. But she knew she was. Her eyes flicked over to Kim, and she thought about ripping her dress off and choking her with it.
Everyone made their way into the limousine as they arrived at the rehearsal dinner, and just as they pulled in front did Nozomi realize something— her father was here.
She couldn’t focus. Although the venue was gorgeous and looked like something you’d see in a movie, her palms began to sweat. Most of Suguru’s family had already arrived, her side of the family there as well. She greeted everyone with absentminded hugs and cheek kisses. 
The usual conversations, ‘I’m sorry to hear about your mom’, ‘Why aren’t you married yet?’, ‘You and your sister look nothing alike,’ ‘You sure you both have the same father?’. It was unbearable, but she was used to it.
When she got down to the final family member, that’s when she saw…him. 
A traditional man, stoic and frightening, the only smile she’d ever seen on his face was if he saw her sister, or her mom, but he was different when it came to her. She follows behind Ami as she hears her sister call him, ‘Otosan’ an affectionate term, bowing respectfully. She then says, “Hi, Pa. I missed you,” pulling him into a hug.
He holds Ami to his chest, giving her a tight squeeze. 
“I missed you too, my love.”
He releases her gently, his eyes shifting over to Nozomi as she stands beside her sister. He looks her up and down for a moment, studying her appearance. This was the moment of truth. 
“Nozomi,” he says, “You look beautiful as ever.”  He holds his arms out, asking for a hug.
She doesn’t expect him to be happy to see her, nor was he an affectionate man. They hadn’t spoken in two years. She bows first as before she greets, “Hi, Pa,” taking in his hug, wrapping herself around him tighter than she thought she would.
He wraps his arms tightly around her shoulders, and it feels… strange.
“My sweet girl…” 
He sighs lowly, “Too beautiful for your own good. Still not married? You know the family is getting worried…”
“Pa,” she brushes off, “I’m fine. This is Ami’s day, we can talk about my loneliness later.”
He laughs, feeling the familiarity. It was like nothing had changed. 
“You’re still stubborn as ever, I see.” 
He pats her back before releasing her, looking her up and down once more. 
“You’ve grown more, you look… different,” he says, “Just like your mother.”
The sentence made her heart ache, and she immediately felt tears wanting to brim her eyes. She quickly blinks them away, humming in response. The sweet moment is vastly interrupted as a woman appears. She was smaller in frame between her and her sister, but was definitely older in age. 
She bows affectionately to them as she greets, “It’s nice to formally meet you, Nozomi. Your father has told me so much about you.”
Nozomi holds back her frown, “Uh—nice to meet you as well, and you are?”
“This is Yua,” her father says, smiling from ear to ear, “My wife.” 
Nozomi blinks, “Oh…wife. You got married two years later…” she stopped herself, it wasn’t the time. Her sister clutched her arm to also shut her up. 
She looks at the woman, “It’s nice to meet you, Yua. I’m gonna go find my seat.”
Yua smiles kindly, a sweet tone in her voice, “Oh of course, enjoy yourself tonight.” 
One thing about her father—and maybe where she got it from—he wasn’t afraid to talk shit about anybody, including his own daughter. 
Her father clears his throat once Nozomi is walking away, sighing out, “That girl still has a mouth on her.” 
“You can’t blame her,” Yua says, looking up at him, “She’s probably still hurt.”
“She’s twenty-seven, it’s time for her to stop pouting like a child.”
She hears the small banter between the two, clutching her fist as she sits next to her Isamu at a round table that’s also accompanied by Kim, and Toji. The interaction between her and her father didn’t go entirely bad, but the comments he made still showed who he was, and now sitting close to Kim and Toji, this night still didn’t feel too good.
As soon as Toji notices her at the table, his eyes are glued to her. 
He had never realized how stubborn she really was. 
That was probably one of the reasons why he liked her so much.
“You okay?” Her brother asks. 
She looks up at him, “Yeah, fine.” 
“I saw you talked to dad.” 
She blinks, “Yeah. I did.”
The night is filled with conversations and laughs, Toji watching as Nozomi becomes more and more irritated. 
This rehearsal was becoming a little too much for her as time continued to pass. She felt like this dinner wouldn’t end, her attention coming along Kim who stood at the stage, clinking a small silverware against her champagne glass.
All eyes turned to her, the table quiet as Kim began to speak, “Thank you all for coming out tonight!”
The room responds with applause, everyone anticipating her speech. Kim smiles sweetly— the type that looks fake to Nozomi, but was entirely convincing to everyone else. 
She smiles, “I just wanted to give a little speech for the couple. The love they share started the moment they looked at each other, and they’ve been an unbreakable pair ever since.” 
The entire room is silent, everyone listening to her every word. Toji could see the anger in Nozomi’s face, her eyes almost burning a hole in Kim’s existence.
“I’m so honored to create the dream that you’ve always wanted, your perfect wedding. And as the woman closest to you,” she looked directly at Nozomi, “I’m so happy to call you my sister.” 
Nozomi thrashes her tongue within her cheek, listening as everyone claps, looking over to her sister's table as she gives a smile, which pisses her off even more.
When the speech is over, she stands from the table as she holds her dress up, going over to the open bar they had as she requested, “Got anything brown?”
The bartender nods, “Certainly. What kind?” 
He makes her a vanilla crown and Coke as requested.  She takes it like a shot. The moment she feels at ease when the drink pours down her throat, it’s like a cloud begins to shadow her sun, and here she is standing in front of her—Kim.
“Are you having fun? You barely talked to anyone tonight,” she feigns a frown, “What’s the matter?” 
She leans against the bar, her elbow perched on the counter top.
“I’m fine, Kim,” she brushes off, not ready for her bullshit. But as she takes the last sip of her drink, she has another thought, “Actually, my sister said there was a fitting for everyone’s dress today. Why wasn’t I told about that?”
Kim’s eyes widened faintly, a playful chuckle rolling off her tongue, “Oh, that?” 
She taps her manicured nails against the top of the counter, shrugging as she does so. 
“I must’ve forgotten to tell you,” she grins, “My bad.”
“Of course you did. You’re good at that little thing you do. Being all cute, acting like you’re not an insolent bitch on the inside. Maybe on the outside,” she tilts her head, giving her the same grin in return, watching as her face fell at her words.
She’s startled a bit at Nozomi’s truth. She thinks quickly on her feet as she takes a step forward, “I think the drink is going to your head, love.”
“Maybe. You should order something for yourself as well! But I suggest you wait until I walk away, cause my hand holding this glass is feeling a little itchy, and you might have a headache further into the night.” 
When she expects Kim to simply go back and forth with her, she suddenly shouts, “You’re gonna do what to me?” 
The calculated bitch, she was purposely causing a scene.
Ami, Toji and her brother came running over as Ami questioned, “What’s going on?” 
“Nozomi just threatened to hit me over the head with a glass! I don’t know what’s going on with you, but you’re scaring me!” Kim presses her hand to her chest, Oscar worthy acting as her hand shakes. 
“What?” Ami looks at Nozomi, “Did you say that?” 
“No!” Nozomi defends, “Well, yes. But not for no reason!”
“Nozomi, what the hell?” Her brother says, “What is going on? Why are you threatening Kim?”
“This bitch just said that she purposely didn’t call me for our dress fitting today!” She exclaims. 
“I would never do that,” Kim defends herself, “I called you a thousand times. You just didn’t answer. I’m sorry, Nozomi.”
“Are you serious?” She blinks, “I’m gonna fuckin’ kill you—“ she goes forward, Isamu stepping in front of her. 
Ami then cuts off,  “Enough, Nozomi. I have been trying to be patient with you since you got here, but this is too much! Doing this at my rehearsal dinner? Making a scene? What the hell is wrong with you?” 
“What the hell is wrong with me? Ask your fucking friend that! Oh, better yet, your new sister! You’re seriously gonna’ blame me for this? When am I ever gonna be taken seriously, and not some fucking drama Queen?”
Everyone in the area is shocked by the commotion, the guests at the rehearsal dinner turning and whispering from their seats.
Ami’s face contorts with anger, “I always take you seriously, but look at what you’re doing right now! I’m constantly at your defense! But you’re acting like a fucking child!”
That.  
It always led back to her being the youngest. Nozomi laughed sharply, “Great. I’m a child. I’m over here pulling myself together on account of your goddamn wedding. Forcing me to be cool with your idiotic ass friend who fucked my man, and is still fucking him to this day! Not only that, forcing me to be here with him! The one who fucked your idiotic ass friend in the first fucking place, because I wouldn’t fuck him! Making me be cordial with my father who I wasn’t ready to forgive, because he fucked his new bitch behind our dying mother’s back—I’m doing all this for you! I’m holding it together for you! And I’m a fucking child? How about you wanting everything your way, but pissed off the minute something goes wrong? That’s a fucking child!” 
“What?” Toji then comes in, “‘The fuck are you talking about?” 
“Don’t be dense. I heard you fucking her the first night I came!” 
Toji blinks, confusion not even the word. His eyes narrow as he says, “I didn’t fuck Kim. This is my first time seeing her since you mom’s funeral, and since I left the states. I left right after you broke shit off with me.” 
Nozomi blinks, now equally confused. 
“What?” 
Isamu then smacks his lips, “Jesus,” chiming in to clear the air, “I was fucking Kim, okay? Toji and her only fucked around that one time.” 
That makes everyone’s eyes bulge out—including Kim’s—now realizing that this was all one big misunderstanding. 
“You’re fucking Kim? Ew!” Nozomi starts, “Seriously? Jesus Christ. When the fuck did you even have time to leave that orchid at my door?” 
“I left that orchid at your door,” Toji then clarifies, “It was supposed to be an apology. I wanted to talk to you, but you stormed back into your room and I didn’t want to piss you off more.” 
Nozomi takes all of this in. She doesn’t know what to say.
There wasn’t anything to say at this point, nor did she want to say anything else. With that, Nozomi does everyone a favor as she exits out of the building, finding her way back to the house. This had been a rehearsal dinner like no other. 
                       ‧₊˚❀༉‧₊˚.  𐦍༘⋆ ‧₊˚❀༉‧₊˚.  𐦍༘⋆
THE NEXT MORNING WAS SILENT, which was unfortunate. It was supposed to be a beautiful day, Ami’s wedding day—everyone was supposed to be excited. But it felt like the complete opposite. The morning was quiet. Nozomi had a lot on her mind, but all of her other bullshit could be figured out later—she needed to make things right with Ami. 
The house had been cleared of all the men as they had to get ready at the venue, the bridal party now on their way to the house, Ami within her room as the makeup artist was also on the way. 
Nozomi quietly slid the door open to her room as she asked, “Can I come in?”
Ami glanced over at the door, a frown on her face, still upset from the previous night. She sighs before nodding softly, “Yeah, you can come in…”
She slides the door closed, standing along the wall. She tries to collect her thoughts, her words. Instead of jumping into the drama, she asks, “How are you feeling? Ready to be Mrs. Getou?”
Ami smiles, her anger softening as her eyes meet her sisters. She lets out a small yawn before nodding slowly, a tired smile on her face. 
“I’m nervous…” Ami admits, “A little too nervous, honestly…”
“It’s no need to be nervous. He loves you, even if you have a crazy ass family,” she tries to poke, “Today’s gonna be an amazing day for you. It already is. It’s filled with love.”
Ami laughs, the comment causing her to snort quietly, “You’re damn right about that. But I’m still a little mad at you…”
Nozomi sighs, “Look, I’m so sorry about last night, Ami. It wasn’t supposed to go like that. I was telling the truth, Kim purposely didn’t call me for the fitting, you know I wouldn’t have missed something as important as that. When she admitted it to me, I just…mushed her being a bitch to her fucking Toji, and I kinda spiraled. You can choose who you want to be friends with, I just don’t like how she treats me,” Nozomi softly admits, looking down to the floor.
Ami sighs, her expression softening. She knew that it hadn’t been entirely her sister's fault, even though she had been the one to cause the scene in the first place. 
“Listen, I’m not mad at you, okay? I wasn’t ever mad at you, I just hate how you never think anything through before doing it. You’ve always been that way, and you need to work on it.” 
Ami stands from the bed, walking over to Nozomi, wrapping her into a tight hug, “I love you, okay?”
“More than Kim?” She questions, trying to make another joke, “I really don’t like that hoe, seriously.”
A soft laugh tumbles from Ami’s lips, a snort following that, “Yes, more than Kim.” 
She pinches her sister's cheek, pulling her head back, “You gotta’ relax, okay? Today is my day, so keep your cool, yeah?”
“Scouts honor,” Nozomi promises, raising her hand up, “I don’t know why you didn’t just make Kim your maid of honor, no shade.”
Ami laughed, “Oh hell no. I want you to be part of the special moment,” She crosses her arms, “She can just stand over there and look pretty like every other bridesmaid.”
Nozomi rolls her eyes, “Yeah. Like a Disney villain.”
“Sidebar—where did you go yesterday?” Her sister then asks. 
Dammit. She was hoping she wouldn’t ask this question. She closes her eyes as she admits, “Don’t freak out. I went out with Toji—“
The squeal was already releasing from her lips, “Oh my god! Y’all are in love again! Wedding bells, are those wedding bells I hear?” 
“Ami.”
“Oh my goodness, he bought you that big ass plushie in your room! That’s the one you wanted mom to get you! I knew your frugal ass didn’t pay thirty-eight thousand yen for that!” 
“Ami.—“ 
“And he gave you an orchid to apologize, cause you love orchids! Oh my god, I’m gushing. I’m blushing!” 
“Jesus Christ, are you done?” Nozomi squints, “It was nothing. He probably thinks I’m crazy now after I accused him of fucking Kim again. But what else was I supposed to think? I probably just fucked everything up.”
Ami rolls her eyes, grabbing Nozomi’s shoulders, her gaze firm as she says, “Listen. You did not mess everything up. If he loved you then, he probably loves you even more now. You just need to apologize to him…after the wedding. Don’t make it about you, okay? Focus on the love we’re all sharing today, alright?”
She nods her head, “Got it.”
Ami smiles, bringing Nozomi into another tight hug, “Good, now go get your hair and makeup done, the artists will be here in an hour, and you’ve gotta’ look the best you can today, alright? You’re my maid of honor, you gotta’ look like the bottom bitch next to the head honcho!” 
“You’re a mess.”
“Not as much as you. It’s really my wedding day, eeeeek!”
They were thankful to have gotten up early, giving just enough time to do everything without feeling rushed. Nozomi of course did Ami’s hair, agreeing with her request to style it within a low bun pulled back to frame her face, sculpting her edges perfectly, adding her favorite flowers within the claw clip holding her hair together. The soft makeup along her expression brought her face out more than heavy makeup would’ve. She was gorgeous without it. Nozomi could feel a lump in her throat about to create, not sure why she suddenly felt so emotional, but she refused to cry. 
Ami’s heart swells at the sight of her sister in the mirror, her eyes softening as she hears her words. Memories of their mother flood her mind—memories of her sitting on the couch, watching her daughters put their hair in intricate styles for dance competitions, or style their hair for a wedding. She felt a pang of sadness in her chest.
Tears start to trickle down Ami’s cheeks, and she quickly wipes at her eyes. “God, don’t make me cry,” she murmurs, “I’m gonna’ ruin my makeup.”
“I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” she kisses her forehead, “Don’t cry. Don’t want you choking me cause your makeup is ruined. No more tears!” She tells her, taking deep breaths with her before she continues crying.
Ami laughs through her tears, wiping at her eyes as she nods, “Okay, okay, no more tears. Don’t make me start again.” 
The makeup artist began to retouch her face. Everything was silent for a moment before Ami clears her throat, her voice soft as she says, “Can I ask you something?”
“Hm?” 
“Do you love him—Toji, I mean?”
Nozomi looks up to the mirror, thinking about the question. She doesn’t lie to herself as she replies, “Yeah, I do. But he’ll never know that.”
Ami’s eyebrows furrow for a moment as she glances back at her sister, “Why not?” 
She turns her head, her eyes soft, “Why would you hold that in? After everything he’s done to show you how he feels, why not tell him?”
“Because today isn’t about me, remember? Now, let the makeup artist finish her job, you can’t keep talking while she does your lip liner,” she distracts, “I’m gonna go get ready.”
“I hate when you deflect,” Ami scrunches her nose, “Whatever. You’re dismissed!”
She began to see the bridesmaids' dresses as she exited the room, seeing that they were simple pink gowns, silky and strapless. They were gorgeous regardless, going to search for which one was hers. But as she continued to look, she noticed a dress hanging along the wall, her name attached to it. Her mouth gaped open. It was entirely different from the bridal parties dresses, the only similarity being the color. 
It was a gown, corseted all around, diamonds and jewels cascading the material all the way up to the top, fluff swimming along where her breast sat, mirroring along the side of her hip. 
“Fucking hell, Ami,” she mutters to herself. 
She didn’t have time to freak out about how extravagant this dress was—she had to get ready. 
She pulls her braids within a low ponytail to accentuate her dress, artistically sculpting her edges. It fits her entirely too well. Her hips struck out, the corset cinched her frame in a way that made her feel the most gorgeous she’d ever felt. When she looks within the mirror, all she can see is her mom. 
She exhales as she goes into the other room to show Ami, her jaw dropping at her older sibling. She’d never looked so… ethereal. 
Her dress was a pure white, covered with soft pearls that gave the illusion they dripped off her body, her entire frame equally corseted, material choking her tightly. 
“Ami,” Nozomi placed her hands over her mouth, not enough to ruin her own makeup, “Oh my goodness,” she became choked up, “You look…”
Ami smiles at her sibling, gently standing to keep her dress from being ruined. She looked down at herself, gently placing her hands along the dress, the gems and diamonds sparkling underneath the lights. 
“Good?” She asks her sister, her voice soft. 
“Amazing,” she promises, “Don’t be nervous. I’m so happy for you. Are you ready? We don’t wanna be late.”
“Let’s get going then, yeah?”
It’s now chaos when they arrive at the venue. None of them had yet to see what it looked like besides the bride and groom, the panic of getting into place leaving everything to a surprise once they walked out. The guests had already arrived, sitting within the white chairs that were covered with pink bows and flowers, wearing their own shades of her sister's favorite color. Here were the groomsmen, perfectly dressed in their tuxes, pink flowers within their breast pockets. They were ready, making sure they were perfectly lined up with the bridesmaid they were assigned to walk with. Ami was hidden within a back room, preparing to be the last one to walk out. 
Nozomi holds her dress as she speed walks out to where everyone else stands, seeing Suguru and Toji standing together. She hadn’t seen him since the chaos of the night before—she couldn’t help but not be happy to see him. Seeing Toji’s suit perfectly frame his broad physique, his best friend stands next to him, his long hair within a bun, tied out of his face. They looked handsome. 
“Ready?” She questions Suguru, “I can’t wait for you to see her. You’re not gonna cry, are you?”
Suguru smiles at the question, an almost embarrassed look on his face. However, he doesn’t deny it, “I’m most definitely going to cry.” 
Toji laughs, shaking his head, “Big ass dork.”
Suguru takes another deep breath before he stands by the door, preparing to walk out. Everyone now stands in place, and that meant it was time for Nozomi to get in position too. She turns to Toji whose eyes she can feel along her body as she asks, “What? Something wrong with my hair?”
Toji couldn’t deny that she looked incredible in that dress—more than incredible, breathtaking. Everything about her seemed to be amplified from the dress. 
She looked amazing, gorgeous, etc, etc.
“Words can’t describe how good you fuckin’ look right now,” he grunts within her ear, reaching out to grab for her hand, kissing her palm before he wraps it around his arm. 
That makes Nozomi‘s face go warm, turning her head back towards the ceremony. She watches as Suguru’s parents walk down the aisle, clicking that it was their turn. She didn’t know why she suddenly felt nervous. 
She nods, “Thank you. Um,” she twists the flower within his breast pocket, “Just—don’t let me fall, okay?”
Toji’s chuckle is attractive, still deep in her ear as he lowly promises, “Not a chance in hell.”
When he slides his arm down to clutch her fingers in his  own, their skin feels electrifying together. She hadn’t held his hand in so long—it felt so good. When they prepare to walk, she tugs his arm as she mutters, “Seriously, Fushiguro. Don’t let me fall. I’ll hurt you.”
His eyes glance down at hers as he promises, “You won’t fall, pretty.” 
They finally walk down the aisle, everyone’s eyes turning to them. The flower petals along the ground are being tread upon as they stroll down the walkway, Nozomi’s heart pounding within her chest. 
He squeezes her hand again, gently rubbing his thumb against her knuckles in an attempt to calm her. It works, but not by much, keeping her mind occupied as they walk.
She can now fully see the venue— cherry blossoms, the main event of it all. They all laid along the ground, pink trees floating above the chairs and guests, slumped down as petals swirled in the air each time the wind blew. She doesn’t realize how tightly she’s holding Toji’s hand, feeling a vast amount of emotions come to her, the sentiments of something as simple as a cherry blossom tree meaning so much more to her.
They finally make it to the end, and Toji releases her hand to go stand near Suguru, his nerves settling as he takes his place next to the groom. The music changes, signaling for the rest of the party to begin walking. Each bridesmaid and groom look perfect together—hell, even Kim and Isamu looked nice walking together.
Everyone giggled as one of Suguru’s younger cousins came tumbling down the aisle, throwing more flowers onto the ground, including a smaller baby boy, who followed after her, holding the rings close to his miniature tuxedo. 
It was finally the moment, the moment everyone had come for. When she appeared at the end of the aisle—a gasp came from the entire venue. Nozomi had already seen her, but seeing her here, holding her father’s arm as she began to walk, her veil that swam the ground, she hated the emotion that began smacking her around. It didn’t make it better that every bridesmaid was already crying—that was enough for her. The music that played, the way she could tell Ami herself was trying to hold back tears, it was the most special moment she had experienced.
Nozomi gripped the flowers in her hand, trying to stop the tears that poured like nothing. When she looked over to the groomsmen side—even they were crying, Suguru’s eyes were red as he couldn’t hold back his emotion. His best friend was of course behind him, rubbing his shoulder to comfort him. When Toji and Nozomi locked eyes, she gave a weak laugh, patting her own face to not mess up her makeup.
Toji couldn’t help but look at the way she was crying, his own eyes feeling soft as his chest felt heavy with an unknown emotion. His face felt warm, almost warm enough to make him tear up, but he tried his best to keep it down by looking away and trying to focus on the groom himself. 
However, every once in a while, his eyes would dart back towards her, admiring the way she looked in the soft lighting, the flower, the corseted dress, even her makeup. It amazed him. Seeing his best friend hold this much emotion towards a woman, it made him realize how much of a fuck up he was with Nozomi—he wanted to make things right.
The ceremony felt quicker than she expected, probably because she spent most of it crying. Everyone cheered and hollered as they kissed, cementing their love. It was now the reception, farther out into the trees, tables, menus, a selection of food, waitresses, anything you thought of at a high-end wedding, it was there. Everyone sat down as it was the bride and grooms first dance, seeing as they held each other tight, ‘SLOW DANCING IN THE DARK,’ by Joji filling the venue, Ami’s smile never leaving her face. 
Nozomi watched with a soft smile, kneeling on her arm. Others began joining them on the dance floor shortly after. Her attention was pulled as she heard her father’s voice behind her, “Omi’?” 
She hesitantly turns to him, “Yes, Pa?”
Her father had a wide smile on his face, his eyes soft as he placed a firm hand on his daughter’s shoulder, gently squeezing it. 
“Can I have this dance?” 
She gave him a gracious smile, “Sure.”
She took his arm, following him to the floor as she held one of his hands, the other going on his shoulder, while his hand went on her hip. They swayed slightly to the music. 
“I’m…really happy to see you, Pa’,” Nozomi tells him softly, “I’m sorry I haven’t called.I just…needed time, when mom passed. I know you wanted me to stay in Japan. But I couldn’t.”
Her father gently squeezed her hip, his eyes soft as he nodded his head, “I know.” He says, “I know it was hard. I remember how distraught you were when mom passed…it was hard on all of us. I couldn’t force you to stay in Japan. You needed some freedom after all that, and you found it in the states.”
He halts for a moment, trying to find his words as he says, “I miss your mom everyday. Despite my bad decisions. She’s always with me, just like she’s here with you.”
Despite his infidelity while their mom was sick, she knew how much he loved her. It wasn’t an excuse, but it could’ve been a way of coping with knowing she was going to pass, it was a loss for everyone. 
“I’ll do better at calling, Pa’. I promise.”
A small chuckle tumbles from her father’s lips, as he shakes his head, “No, you won’t,” he teased, “I’ll just have to keep calling you until you finally answer.”
“You know me so well,” she chuckles, continuing to sway with him. 
The moment was something she couldn’t ask for twice. To make up with her father, it brought a weight off her shoulders. She felt at peace. Maybe she needed to come back home. 
Her final conflict she had to resolve appeared, Toji stepping in as he politely asked her father, “May I?”
Her father nods gently at the man, patting his daughter on the hip one last time as Toji steps in front of her, holding his hand out. His eyes slowly drift downwards, examining the beautiful maid of honor, his chest feeling almost tight.
“There you are,” she says softly, bringing her arms around his neck, an eyebrow raising as Toji questions, “You were looking for me?” 
“Maybe.”
He places his hands on her hips, a smirk forming on his face, “You’ve been avoiding me,” he reminds, “The whole damn time. Barely said shit to me.”
“Wanted to make sure you weren’t mad at me,” she deflects, pulling his neck down, wanting him to be closer to her than he was, “The rehearsal dinner was a shitshow.”
Toji’s hands tightened on her hips as he pulled her a bit closer, their chests nearly touching. His dark gray eyes pierced into hers, almost staring into her soul.
“I’m not mad,” he mutters, “I’m used to your bullshit by now. It’s expected.”
She exhales, “That doesn’t sound like much of a compliment.” 
“Cause it isn’t.” 
The same song plays, distracting her for a moment. She rolls her eyes, “So what do you like about me then, since I’m such a problem?”
“You’re a smartass,” he stated bluntly, “A smartass that knows how to press my fuckin’ buttons. A smartass that’s stubborn as all hell. A smartass…that also happens to be the prettiest person in the fuckin’ building. The only person I see here.”
Nozomi blinks up at him, her eyes glittering underneath the lights they have within the ceiling. 
“You’ really wanna be with me?” She asks softly, knowing the answer, maybe just needing reassurance.
“Don’t ask shit you already know the answer to,” he grunts, mouth lowering closer to her ear. 
His forehead pressed against hers, Nozomi giggling as he pulled her heels along his own shoes, holding her close. This might’ve been the moment she needed from him. 
They stayed like that for a while. 
The reception is in full force, different family members dancing together, Suguru and Ami inseparable, the music and food perfect for the environment. Nozomi had found a small moment to pull her and Toji away from the reception as the newlyweds took pictures, pulling him deeper into the trees, away from all the people—away from an audience. 
She leans herself against the bark, fidgeting her hands against his tux as she rambles, “My mom actually wanted her burial to be a cherry blossom tree,” she says softly, keeping her eyes along the material of his tux.
She continues, “We didn’t know until we found her wishes hidden inside the mattress. A weird place to put it,” she laughs, but it’s weak, nothing actually funny, “I think that’s why this whole wedding has been so…emotional for me. Besides seeing my sister be in love and so happy. This entire weekend has brought so many memories for me. Things I’ve realized about myself. Things I wanna fix…”
Toji couldn’t help but watch her closely as she opened up. This was the first time in a while that she’s been so…honest. So vulnerable. 
“I don’t think I ever thanked you for the orchid you left at my door,” she says quietly, “Despite the way I treated you, you still tried. And tried, and tried…” she giggles, Toji grunting as he presses his forehead along hers. She then says, “I also haven’t apologized.“
It was as if everything that happened after that was an unfortunate cue.
 Their attention is pulled away from each other as Isamu and Kim walk up to them, her brother loud as he calls, “Yo, where y’all at? Sneaking out already?”
She tries not to be irritated with her sibling. But as she notices Kim beside him giving her the nastiest look, her blood pressure spikes. 
“Just talking,” Nozomi replies, keeping her hand along Toji’s suit. 
“Got him under your claws so I don’t get to him, I see,” Kim sharply replies, and it’s quick, so quick that Nozomi almost doesn’t catch it. 
She slightly sits herself up as she raises an eyebrow, “Excuse me?”
Kim shrugs, “You assumed I’ve just been fucking him all weekend, is my comment too far off?”
“No, actually, it isn’t. You fucked’ him before, makes no difference now. A hoe is still a hoe.”
“Who are you calling a hoe?” Kim fires off, coming closer. 
But that wasn’t a problem, Nozomi was ready to put her in a headlock as she came around Toji, “ You know what— I can blame a man for his stupidity. But what I can’t handle, is a stupid ass bitch like you that would do anything for the idiocy that is a man’s attention. You knew how I felt about Toji, and yet you fucked him anyways, and you were suppose to be my friend. You’re lucky I didn’t fuckin’ shoot you.”
“Alright, knock it the fuck off,” Toji mutters, bringing his arm around her hip, lightly pulling her back from Kim who was in arms reach of the girl. 
Kim then says, “Don’t blame me that you couldn’t keep your supposed  man in check. I wouldn’t want you either if you didn’t wanna fuck me, Ms. Holier Than Thou.” 
Yup, that was it.
Nozomi laughed humorlessly, taking a step back as she moved Toji’s arm to let him know she was calm, but it was the complete opposite. 
Her eyes quickly scanned the scenery, seeing no one else around, locking her eyes back on Kim. She steps forward, plummeting her knuckles clean into Kim’s jaw, the crack heard in the echoes of the trees, Kim immediately dropping to the ground from the impact. 
“Yo, Nozomi, what the fuck!” Isamu exclaimed. 
Kim holds the side of her face, turning to the side as she spat blood on the ground. Nozomi’s anger had seeped over her. She didn’t mean to hit her, it just happened. Her knuckles stung, but it’s unfortunate that she didn’t feel satisfied. When she lunges forward to finish her off, her feet are suddenly off the ground, Nozomi grunting as she’s being thrown over Toji’s shoulder again, being pulled away from the reception. 
“Put me the fuck down!” 
She didn’t realize how close they actually were to their family’s house, practically feeling the fire off Toji’s body. He carried her into his room, Nozomi grunting as she hit the bed, breathless as her dress was already tight. 
She glares as she sits up, “What?”
Toji was absolutely livid. He could feel the anger radiating off himself as he stepped into the bedroom, his eyes piercing into the woman on the bed. He had never seen her like this before. He didn’t have the time for her bullshit. 
“What the fuck were you thinking?” He questioned, anger laced in his voice, “You trying to get arrested at your sister's wedding?”
“I wouldn’t have gotten arrested,” she scoffed, “Don’t be dramatic. I been letting that bitch talk crazy to me all weekend. The bitch has literally been flirting with you, all up your fuckin’ ass, and you just—let her,” she spits.
“What part of I didn't reciprocate anything isn't getting through your thick ass skull?” He snapped at her, “I don’t give a fuck if she flirts with me. I wasn't interested. I only give a fuck about you.”
“Oh? So fucking her two years ago showed that you weren’t interested? You know what— let’s talk about it!” She exclaims, “Let’s just put it all out there. We were talking, it was becoming serious. Kim was my friend, a close friend at the time. Just when I was ready to bring my walls down, make things official, be with you, I find out you fucked Kim. And conveniently? It was right after I told you I wouldn’t have sex with you unless we were officially together. You couldn’t commit to me, but you could fuck her. Are we on the same page? Am I missing anything?” 
Toji's eyes darkened. The air between them was thick with tension. He never wanted to talk about this part of their relationship again, but if she was going to bring it up—he had to deal with it. 
“I could barely commit to you at the time,” he stated angrily, “You told me you wouldn't be intimate with me unless we were together. What the hell was I supposed to do?”
“Wait for me!”  She shouted back, feeling her throat becoming tight. 
“You were supposed to wait for me! You said that it wasn’t important, that you loved me! If you didn’t, you should’ve never fucking led me on! That's why I hated you. I hated you for it. You sit here now, talking about ‘what was I supposed to do’— you haven’t fucking changed!” She continues to keep her voice raised.
Her anger seeps through so quickly that she can’t help the vast punch she throws into his chest, fist shaking as she turns away from him to control herself. She wanted to be violent.
He reached out and grabbed her wrists, spinning her around to look at him. His eyes locked onto hers with a dangerous glare as he spoke, “I’ve changed. But you’re acting too fuckin’ stupid to see that. It’s like you’re looking for reasons to push me away. To end what we have.”
“Oh? You’ve changed. Typical. Say it a couple more times and maybe you’ll believe yourself. You haven’t fucking changed. You’re a bitch.” 
“Watch your fuckin’ mouth, Nozomi.” 
“Make me.” 
He could set off a bomb with the fear-inducing look he gave her, practically enraged at this point. 
“You made your bed. Be a fucking man and lay in that shit. You wanted pussy so bad you had to fuck a bitch that fucks everybody, my friend at the time. Now look at your bitch on a string, onto the next, fucking my brother when I wasn’t even worried about you. Now you wanna come back to me on some change bullshit. Fuck you.” 
“I'm not that same man anymore,” he spat, “But I guess that doesn’t matter to you, huh? No matter how much I fuckin’ change. No matter how much I try. Your stubborn ass still thinks I’m the same man I was two years ago. You haven’t changed either.”
“And how the fuck haven’t I changed?”
“You’re still the woman who runs from every single emotion. Pushing everyone away from you. You can’t even stand to deal with your own fuckin’ feelings, so it’s easier for you to push everyone out of your life. You’re weak.” 
The words hit her. Actually, hit her. It all mushes together. The loss of her mother, shutting everyone out when she needed support in her time of grief. Toji. Her father. All of it. 
The tears finally come up, dropping down her face as there’s nothing but pure malice behind her voice as she lowly spits, “Fuck you.” 
“I’m sorry I hurt you, Nozomi. I would never hurt you the way I did before.” 
“Shut the fuck up.” 
“I love you.” 
Her heart stopped, hearing those words come from him. He was gruff in his tone, but meant exactly what he said. He wasn’t gonna let her push him away. 
“No you don’t,” she says, her voice cracking as she says that, “No you don’t. Stop lying to me!” 
He comes forward, gripping her tighter by her wrist and tugging her towards him, causing her to try to yank out of his hold as she panics, “Let go of me!”
“Say it again,” he challenged, his voice a low growl, “Say that I don't love you. Say that shit again. Say that you hate me.”
“I fucking hate you!” She exclaims, her voice trembling, slamming her fist into his chest as he takes hold of her other arm, “I hate you…I hate you…” 
The tears won’t stop, and she can’t believe her own words. It gets to a point where her entire body trembles, and she throws her hands over her face, sobbing, “Let me go, Toji…”
Toji's heart tightens in his chest when he sees her crumble before him. This was the first time he’s ever really seen her break like this. He pulled her into his arms, wrapping them around her tightly as he held her against his chest, letting her cry into him. 
“Cry, baby. I want you too. Need you too. I’m here to let you.”
She felt extremely overwhelmed, covering her face to mask her embarrassment, but that quickly fades. She reaches up, wrapping her arms around his neck, clutching her fingers in his hair as she cries. 
He could feel her pain, her hurt, her anger. It practically radiated off of her. But there was one emotion that he could feel clearly. Fear. She was scared.
She didn’t want to be hurt again like the first time, she didn’t know if she could trust him with her heart again. But there was only one way she could find that out. Her crying eventually subsides, tears still along her face as she breathes into his neck, her hand still clutching within his hair.
 She says softly, “I…I love you too…”
Toji felt his breathing stop for a moment as he listened to her words. The three words he’s been wanting to hear for so long. 
“Again,” he mumbled against her skin, “Say that shit again.”
The sound of his voice. It’s different. She hadn’t heard him sound like this in a while, and when he did, it intimidated her. Sex didn’t necessarily scare her, it just scared her with him, for him to be her first. 
“I love y—“ 
It’s interrupted, Toji lowering down as he locks his mouth with hers, clutching a grip along her throat as he filthily kisses her. It’s abnormal. He wanted to entice her, he needed her.
He didn’t hold anything back as he slipped his tongue inside of her mouth, his fingers fully wrapping around her neck as a way to keep her still. He was enthralled, and he was going to show her just how badly he was. 
When he pulled his mouth back, her skin felt on fire. Her eyes blinked residuals of tears, teeth digging into her lip as he kept yanking her forward for another kiss, his mouth on her throat, her chest, her jaw, tongue dragging up her skin, aching for her. 
Her breath hitched as he picked her up, carrying her onto the bed. Her mind is spinning as he hovers over her frame, grasping her by the back of her neck and holding her up, kissing her so fiercely that it made her entire body tremble.
Toji’s mind was reeling. The feeling of her against him, her scent filling his nostrils, the way her skin felt against his lips. He felt like he was in a dream—a hazy, lustful dream. 
He pulled back from her mouth, leaving a trail of kisses down her jaw before moving to her neck. His lips left marks along her skin, wanting her to feel them the next morning when she woke up. 
She finally lets her mouth drop words out as she nervously exhales, “Fushiguro, wait…”
When her words came out with a breathlessness to them, Toji felt his mind go crazy. He pulled back, his hot breath fanning against her skin as he locked his eyes on hers. 
“What?” He questioned in a low tone, his gaze flicking down to her lips as he waited for her to speak.
“You know I haven’t…” she feels embarrassed, “I just…I don’t want to look stupid.”
Toji’s expression softened as he heard her words. He knew her concern, he understood it. But in his eyes, she was anything but stupid. She was perfect. 
“You won’t,” he assured her, his hand moving up to grip her chin, “You don’t look stupid. Let me take care of you.”
She blinks. Her hand slowly reaches back for his hair, nodding her head as she asks him quietly, “Can you…kiss my neck again? It…It felt nice.”
A low grunt of approval rolled from his lips as he heard her request. He leaned in, hovering just above her skin, teasing her, watching her reaction as he finally planted his lips along her neck, right under her ear. The feeling makes her breath hitch, her head kneeling back slightly to rush off the burn she gets from his mouth. 
He left a trail of kisses down to her collarbone, his tongue slowly dragging along one part of her skin in the most torturous way. She shifts beneath him, her chest rising, trying to appear normal—but her skin is buzzing.
He nips at the skin just below her collarbone, and that’s when he hears a sound that sets him absolutely off. 
A gasp. It escapes from her lips as she tries to bite it back. The sound makes his ears go crazy, and he’s instantly driven by one thing now. More.
The dress she wears instantly feels tighter. She’d been around Toji many times, but never fully naked. She kneels her head up, mouth close to his as she murmurs, “Need to um…take my dress off…”
“I know.” 
Her throat goes dry as he flips her body over beneath him, effortless as if she weighed nothing. He begins unzipping the dress, sliding his hand inside the material, his mouth now along the back of her neck. He uses his free hand to grip her hair, fisting it into a ponytail beneath his palms as the dress hits the ground with a thud. Her entire body was now bare to him from behind, only being covered by the ballerina pink thong she wore.
Her skin was like fine porcelain, smooth and delicate. He could see some ink that stretched along her skin, and he instantly was curious to see all of it later. For now, he would leave those questions for another time. His mouth trailed up along her neck before he whispered into her ear. 
“I wanna hear my name from your mouth.” He demanded lowly. “Need to hear it.”
He still holds her hair within his fist, his mouth along her skin again, now along her spine, causing her eyes to flutter closed, unable to respond just yet, only arching her back to show she enjoyed the feeling. Chills rushed down her body as he locked his fingers around her ankle, twisting her towards being on her back again. His mouth was now crawling on the back of her thigh. 
She shivered, a reaction coming from her as she gasped softly, “T—Toji, w—wait—“ 
Yet he didn’t stop, grunting as he continued making out with her leg, dragging his lips across her skin, running his tongue up to reach the back of her foot, repetitively making her lower body throb in a way she hadn’t felt before, like she needed something from him.
Toji was drunk with the feeling of her beneath him. His lips were famished on her skin, marking her up in places that he knew no one would see. When she was now on her back, Nozomi couldn’t help but press her arm over her breasts, her other hand pressing in between her legs to cover herself. She wasn’t insecure in her body, but this was the first time he’d officially seen her naked. She felt…shy.
“Nah, don’t cover yourself from me,” he grunts, “I wanna see my woman.” 
Toji felt her shiver underneath him. He had to taste more of her, to see what else he could make her react to.
His mouth trailed up her leg, lingering near her core. His expression made her entire lower body warm. He leaned forward, darting his tongue out to tease her clit through the fabric of her panties. A low growl came from him in response as he felt her tense underneath him. He lifted his head, looking up at her with a smirk as he tugged her panties to the side, revealing her wet opening to him.
"You're so fuckin’ wet already,” he groaned. 
Her legs nearly locked together when he gave her clit the softest kiss, admiring the pink nub. Her pussy was pretty. Just for him. Leaning back down to lick at her folds, his tongue swirled around her clit before he sucked it into his mouth.
Nozomi’s body shuddered, the feeling almost ticklish, like she wanted to push him away. He instantly locked his hands along the back of her thighs, pressing her knees against the bed as he grunted, nudging his mouth farther into her clit, a slurping sound creating at the way his lips moved. Her hand went to grip his hair if she couldn’t escape, a soft gasp leaving her lips as she whimpered, “Toji…”
The moment she called out his name, Toji felt something stir within him. It wasn't just lust anymore, it was desire. A need to claim her, to mark her as his own.
He continued eating at her, his tongue delving deeper into her folds as he tasted every inch. His hands tightened around her thighs as he held her open for himself, letting her feel his hot breath fan across her sensitive flesh.
"Fuck...you taste even better than I imagined," he murmured, his voice muffled as he dragged his entire mouth along her core, Nozomi jumping as he harshly spanked the side of her thigh in approval. 
Her legs lightly clasped around his face, twisting his head a bit as it felt overwhelming, gripping his hair harder as her body trembled. She whimpered again, pleading to him, “Baby…”
But that didn’t do anything to stop him, if anything it made him continue. Her breath hitched as one of his hands came up, gripping her breast within his palm as the other kept her legs spread.
Toji felt her squirm beneath him, her pleas only spurring him on further. He loved the way she sounded, begging for him to stop yet unable to pull herself away.
“I’m sorry, baby. Can’t help myself,” he groans to her. 
She's trapped beneath his relentlessment as he sticks his tongue out, pushing it inside of her walls, warm and gummy as they fold around his mouth. His eyes nearly rolled as he groaned again, feeling Nozomi’s thighs trembling as she softly cried— He could taste her arousal, thick and potent. It was intoxicating, making him drunk with desire.
“Pussy is so fuckin’ pretty,” he grunts, holding her thighs apart as he circles his head, deepening his tongue inside her, the sight to Nozomi’s eyes completely filthy.
She throws her hands over her face as she softly cries, “Fushiguro….stop…”  her face was entirely red.
The more she begged, the more Toji wanted to hear it. He liked hearing her pleads. He had the intention to make it worse. 
"Shut the fuck up,” he grunted out, “‘Gonna put your whole pussy on my face,” his tongue delving deeper into her. He could feel her walls clenching around him, her juices coating his face as he ate her out.
His hands gripped tighter onto her thighs, holding her open for himself as he continued to feast on her. He could feel her trembling beneath him, her pleas only serving to fuel his desire.
"Oh fuck...you're so tight," he groaned, his tongue curling as he pushed it further inside of her, “Not gonna be able to handle all this dick. Gonna fuckin’ cry,” he won’t stop talking, she wants to punch him at this point. 
Toji couldn't get enough of her—the taste of her. He lapped at her hungrily, his tongue plunging into her depths as his hands held her legs up. He could feel her tightening around him, her juices flowing freely as he devoured her.
"Oh my god, baby, gonna make you cum..." he growled against her pussy, his voice muffled by her folds. "Then I’m gonna fuck you up until you can't walk straight. Can’t think straight.” 
His words in her mind— it makes her legs shake even harder, trapping his head within her thighs again. He snatches them open, the sight of his eyes closed, tongue dipping in and out of her, she felt like she was going to faint. He gets a good leverage of her hips, dragging his tongue back up her clit, sucking it between his lips as the sound echoes in the room, sliding back down as he yanks her pussy against his jaw, practically bouncing her against his mouth. Her abdomen shakes as waves of pleasure come crashing down, something like his tongue making  her feel a stretch in her walls, how was she gonna survive? 
It didn’t help that Toji was beneath her, moaning as if this pleased him entirely, head swiveling around, bottom of his face completely soaked. Toji was lost in the taste of her, the feel of her body writhing beneath him. Her cries filled his ears, her juices coated his tongue, and the way her body shook beneath him drove him wild.
He sucked harder on her clit, his tongue swirling around the sensitive nub as he worked it into his mouth. His hands gripped her hips tightly, holding her in place as he rolled his lips, sucking all at the same time, practically drinking between her legs. 
The moment her legs opened a bit wider for him, Nozomi reached up for her ankle that quivered, her hips matching the jitter as she looked down to him, panting, “Agh…Fushiguro…I—baby…” 
“About to cum, pretty baby?”
“I—I don’t know…” her throat grasps for the oxygen in the room, “F—Feel like I have to pee…”
That makes him grunt, clutching his palms back around her ankles, hovering his mouth above her hips as he makes contact directly with her clit, sloppily slurping at the sticky and wet flesh, dropping his lower lip against her entire core as he slows his mouth down, head motioning in a circle so effectively that he should’ve been dizzy. The sight, the sound, all of it makes Nozomi’s eyes flutter. She tightly snatches his hair as her abdomen tenses up, a sense of defeat as she gushes along his face, Toji reaching up as he sticks his fingers within her mouth, pulling her up by her teeth to make her watch. 
“Cum just like that. Good fuckin’ girl,” his voice is still muffled, entrapping her pussy with his mouth, lapping up her arousal mercilessly, worshipping her body for the pleasure she releases. She jumps as he raises his hand, spanking the side of her ass, gripping the flesh to watch it faint a color of red. 
Her eyes are low, body tired—but they’d only just begun. 
He comes up as he snatches the side of her face, plunging his lips against her own as he messily makes out with her. Nozomi attempts to keep up with him, but her body feels paralyzed, wondering if this was her time to plead the fifth. This man was trying to kill her. 
“Eyes,” he tells her, gripping her chin to look at him, “You’ okay? Need me to stop?”
Despite her own mind in fear of what was to come next, her body was on vibrate, and a bigger part of her wanted more. Needed more. She shook her head, pulling her eyes open as a response.
 She gasps softly as spanks her ass, “Nah. Fuck all that no talking shit, tell me everything you feel. Tell me you want me to keep going.” 
The thought of being vocal made her nervous, embarrassed even. She said softly, “Keep going…” 
He smacks his lips with a grunt of, “You can do better than that,” pulling her into another kiss before he backs up, standing at the edge of the bed to begin removing his own clothes. Nozomi only watches, her face warm and flustered, thinking back to running out of the room each time this man even took his shirt off. 
Now here he was, dark eyes intently on her as he aggressively tugged off his tie, never as gentle with himself as he could be with her. Her eyes drop down as he begins removing his pants, trying to hide the way her eyes want to fall out when he pulls down his boxers—he definitely was…gifted, if she could find the word.
“Don’t look at me like that if you don’t wanna come play with it.” 
She keeps her eyes to herself. 
He almost chuckles, feeling her gaze pull away as he stands before her, now completely naked. His entire frame was beautifully sculpted, abdomen hard, nearly sharp within her sight. He comes back onto the bed, his large arms caging her in by the sides of her head.  
“Like what you see, huh?”
 His lips are close to hers again, lightly brushing along the baby pink of her mouth. Her face is warm again, looking everywhere but between his legs. She says softly, “Don’t do that,” too nervous for his teasing. It’s the little things he does, brushing his mouth against hers instead of actually kissing her that drives her crazy. Her mouth is parted as she wants him to make out with her, but instead he presses light kisses along her jaw, watching as it makes her chest heave up and down, wrapping her arm around his neck, reaching for his hair from behind.
He chuckles, enjoying just how much he can get her worked up. Her need for his mouth on hers was obvious, it only made him want to tease her even more. 
 “You want my mouth?”
His fucking voice—the way he slowly begins locking her legs over his shoulders, it makes her clutch tighter for his hair. A small whine comes from her mouth, breathing into his throat as she begs beneath her breath, “Want your mouth, so bad…”
She’s so vulnerable like this, so vulnerable beneath him. 
“I know you do.” He mutters against her skin, his mouth now trailing up to her ear, “You’re so fuckin’ pretty like this, you know that? Begging for me, whining to have my mouth on you.”
Her legs being separated by his shoulders make her ache even more, unable to squeeze them together anymore. He still doesn’t give her what he wants. He needed the perfect moment. Her heart beats within her chest, hoping this isn’t as painful as she imagined it to be. 
Toji’s face hovers over hers, face stoic as he watches her expression. He locks his palms around her ankles while trapping her along the bed. The moment feels like an eternity. He takes his tip within his hand, rubbing it against her clit, watching as she shudders from that. He then slaps it along her opening, listening to her pussy squelch, needing to be filled. The silence was deafening at this point. 
Slowly, dreadfully, achingly, he begins to push inside of her. Nozomi’s eyes twitch, her mouth parts open a little after, and she starts to feel a deep pinch in her lower body, a sweet pain that she’d never experienced before. Toji keeps his eyes up, gently placing his forehead on top of hers as he moves a bit, the hold she had along his hair clutches even tighter, and finally, a whimper comes from her lips.
The sound of her whimper causes him to pause, closing his eyes momentarily to control himself. He was already engulfed in her pleasure, but it was the fact that he knew he was her first that was making him absolutely feral. 
Toji felt his breath get caught in his throat the moment he heard that sound come from her. It was a mixture of pain and pleasure, and it sounded so damn good to his ears.
Her legs instantly began trembling. Her arms around his neck tighten as she leans her head back, pulling him forward to press his lips along her neck. The mixture of the two feelings made her legs tremble even more, a shuddering whine coming from her mouth. 
She gasped, deeply, her eyes closing as she could feel tears brimming in them, a pleasure she had never experienced before filling her body.
The sight of her so sensitive causes his mind to snap. Her body is like a piece of glass; he has to hold her with care, otherwise she’d break. He had to be gentle with her, and he had never been this gentle with anyone. 
She’s gasping along his ear, Toji unable to help himself to talk to her as he grunts, “Shit feels good, doesn’t it? This is my pussy, huh?” 
His voice in her ear sends her into panting softly, keeping her grip on his hair. His grip along her ankles doesn’t falter, spreading her legs a little wider, Nozomi pulling his face deeper into her neck as she trembles, “Oh my…ohmygod.”
Her trembling beneath him only makes his heart race that much faster. She’s so reactive, every subtle movement he makes as he’s between her legs brings a new response. He lets her claw into his hair, needing her to mark him in some way as her hands stay there. 
Toji’s mind is hazy as he pushes deeper into her, a low groan leaving his mouth near her ear. “You’re doing so good, baby.”
Her inhales are short, but her exhales are long. She pulls his face up to meet hers, lightly pulling their lips together, trying to kiss him, unable to as her head spins, eyes rolling to the back of her head. She whines softly, “B—baby…I…”
He can’t help the grin that comes to his face as she tries desperately to kiss him, but her body is too sensitive to it. She trembles, her hair sticking to her skin, a glow of sweat along her body. 
It’s pleasure, and only Toji can give it to her. He’ll give her all of it. 
“What, baby?” He muttered against her skin, peppering kisses along her neck as he continued his slow movements. “You’ gonna say my name again?”
He’s barely moving, but the moment he does, she cries softly, dragging her nails into his back, “Toji,” she whimpers his name in the most desperate way, as if wasn’t allowed to.
Each time she says his name, he can’t help but feel heat fill his body. Each cry, each whimper, each breath from her skin as she says his name, it makes him hungry for more. 
His grip on her ankles tightens, using them in order to drive himself deeper. When she cries his name, Toji can’t help but groan against her skin, kissing where he can as he whispers, “Say my fuckin’ name just like that.”
His left hand reaches up for the headboard, finding a grip along the wood as his other hand still holds her ankle. Nozomi keeps her nails dug into his back, face within his shoulder as she brokenly moans, feeling that she’d be embarrassed about the sounds she made later. 
She gasps softly, “I…I feel…different…”
It’s obvious that she’s still new to the feeling. Her whimpers are filled with a hint of pain, but Toji was determined to make this as good for her as possible. 
He wants no thought to be in her mind but him.
“How do you feel?” He asked her between breaths, his chest pressing against hers, his head buried in her neck as he began to pick up rhythm, their flesh creating a clapping sound. He slowly moved her leg, moving it to a spot that would make her feel even more.
Her leg trembles at the movement of her leg, mouth right against his as a genuine, “Ughn—shit,” scatters desperately from her lips, eyes fluttering shut, losing the side of her brain to answer the question.
The sound of her swearing has a dark chuckle fan against her mouth from him. Toji wants to ruin her, and he intends to do just that. He wants to make her so sensitive that she’d be unable to handle just one more touch.
His lips brush hers as whispers to her, his movements deliberate and calculated. “You feel good, baby?” He muttered against her skin, “You’ hear me fucking you? Hear your pussy, baby? She sounds so pretty, doesn’t she? Sucking me in like she can’t let go. Listen.” 
The clapping sound of their skin, the way his hips bury into her, sloshing each time he pushes inside. She inhales deeply, eyes rolling to the back of her head as she breathlessly whimpers, “Yeaah,” she drags the word out a bit to her disadvantage, clutching his hair again, sucking her breathing back to silence as she hears herself losing her sense to talk.
Her voice makes Toji groan. She sounds absolutely wrecked. 
“It’s too much, huh?” He cooes, the bastard, his hand moving from her ankle to her thigh, “Who’s making you feel like this?” 
“You, baby,” she says, eyes rolling back ever so slightly, “You, baby. Fuck, it’s you, baby,” she repeats, as if she didn’t hear herself the first two times.
“That’s fuckin’ right,”  He muttered against her skin, his hand rubbing up and down her thigh as he continued his movements, making her feel every each inch of him, “Nobody else is gonna fuck you the way I do.” 
She’s the one who’s begging for him. She’s whining for him, and only him. She’s saying his name and only his name.
“You feel so good, baby.” He whispers to her, “Pussy made just for me. Wanna eat her again, miss that shit gushing all on my mouth.” 
She’s gripping onto him for dear life. Her reactive moans  is the only thing he can hear as he continued, “You’re so sensitive. If I eat you out, I know you’re gonna cream, might even squirt. Fuck, baby…” 
“Oooohshit,” her mouth parts, Toji grasping a rough kiss at the opportunity of her mouth opening, “Fuckin’ feel you, baby,” she clutches his hair tighter, “D—Don’t mean to pull your hair like that…m’sorry…”
“Pull harder.” He orders her, his voice low as his lips now give company to her ear. 
She tugs a little more in response—soft, making sure she doesn’t hurt him—which causes Toji to chuckle, the deep sound fanning against her lips. 
She nearly pouted, “Don’t laugh at me…”
He kisses her shoulder gently before grunts, “You’re so fuckin’ cute like this. Fuckin’ needy ass. So tough, so mouthy—all you needed was some dick.”
“You’re making fun of me…” she whimpers, turning her face down to his shoulder, becoming a bit
more vocal as her body relaxes. 
“I am,” he admitted against her skin, “But you’re taking my shit so good, baby. You’re being such a good girl, it’s so fuckin’ sexy.”
It seems that his voice is what triggers her, because when she takes in his tone, a particularly deep gasp comes from her chest, her head kneeling back, hips squirming in response. Her pussy tightens. 
Toji grumbles against her neck, “You like my voice, baby?”
She nods her head, “I—agh—like it, baby,” she agrees softly, “Like when you talk to me…” she tries to find her words, feeling her face warm as she also adds, “Like when you’re a little rough with me…”
He chuckles against her skin, her confession only furthering his drive, “Rough, huh?” He muttered against her skin, “I’m trying to be gentle, baby. Don’t do that.” 
“I’m okay,” her voice is soft, but it’s a protest, “Feels good, baby. I…” she drags her nails down his back, “Want more of you.”
The sound of her voice is so soft and needy, so desperate for more of him, Toji can’t keep himself from groaning against her skin, her nails digging into his skin just making him all the more greedy. 
“You want more of me?” He muttered against her neck, his lips brushing along her pulse, “You can barely take the dick I’m giving you now, whimpering and shit. You don’t need more.” 
She pulls him down by his hair, tugging it the way he asked before, her tongue dragging along his skin as she whimpers, “Please, Toji…”
The tug on his hair makes his breath get caught in this throat, and the way her tongue drags along his skin is only adding more gasoline to the fire that’s already burning inside of him. 
“Please what, baby?” He asked her against her skin, her whimpering driving him further over the edge, “You gotta tell me what you want, baby. Use your words.”
She thinks for a moment, trying to figure out exactly what she wanted. She then tells him, “‘Wanna get on top.”
The statement takes him by surprise, his movements pausing as he lifts his head to look at her. Being on top would give her a position of control. But one look at her face, her expression, he finds that he’s unable to say no even if he wanted to. 
“You wanna ride me, baby?” He grunts to her, Nozomi nodding in response as she persuades, “‘Wanna show you I can handle you…” a desperation to her tone, “Want you to feel good too.”
“I feel good as fuck, baby. Don’t worry about that. Come here.”
He leans himself back along the bed, pulling her above him as he states, “Prove that shit, then.”
Now she was actually nervous. Her legs feel numb, and there’s a very faint cramp in her lower abdomen, but the pleasure she felt—a rush of it came over her body seeing him now laid on his back, dark eyes watching her every move. She wanted more. 
She slowly crawls towards him, curiously eyeing the monster that stood at her attention, it jumping when she looks fully at his dick. It was veiny, probably heavy in her hands. She can’t help it. She leans forward as she wraps her lips around his tip, dipping her head down as she drags spit along his entire length, pulling her mouth back with a pop.
 As she runs her tongue over her lips, she feels him clutch her jaw, grunting at the sight of her sucking his dick as he growls, “You’re not ready for that. Come bounce on my dick.” 
She listens— although something in her prefers to be defiant—coming onto his lap, reaching behind herself as she runs her palm along his tip, guiding it towards her opening as she spreads herself with her other hand.  
She sinks herself down, the newfound feeling causing her eyes to drop lower, a soft gasp leaving her lips. It was an aching pinch in her body all over again. She adjusts her hips as she moans, feeling Toji’s hands grip the skin of her ass, balancing her weight.
He groaned at her walls tightening around him, opening his palm as he slammed it against her ass with a gruff, “That’s it, baby…” 
She leans herself into him, placing her hands along his chest as she looks behind herself, slowly raising her hips, gently dropping her ass back down. Her entire abdomen felt on fire, her eyes fluttering closed as her legs throbbed, pulling her hair behind her ear as she shuddered, “Like that?”
He groaned the second she began to move, and he was barely able to hold himself back from lifting her hips himself, making her move. He’s letting her set the pace, making sure to give her as much time as she needs to adjust herself. 
His hands found her hips again, guiding her gently as he let out a husky, “Just like that, baby…” His voice is a harsh whisper, his eyes unable to leave her. “So fuckin’ sexy…” 
The way his voice sounds is different from before, a vulnerability that he didn’t have when she was beneath him. She moved her hips up and down a couple of more times, the final connection sending a wave of pleasure over her body, her breath hitching before a soft moan released. This is where she began to find her rhythm, moving a little faster, her fingers sinking into his chest, digging into the skin as she dug her teeth into her lip, eyebrows furrowing as she attempted to hold back the whimpers that wanted to drop from her lips.
As she found her rhythm, Toji allowed himself to let out a low groan, his eyes closing as he savored the feeling of her body against his. The dig of her nails into his skin only drove him farther over the edge, his hands on her hips only holding her, fighting the demon that wanted to take control. He could feel her slowly gaining more confidence—he was loving it. 
“Riding my shit like a fuckin’ pro, baby…” 
She wasn’t sure why was so shy at this moment, and in order for her to feel good, she needed to relax. She swirls her hips around, running her fingers over her body in a way that makes her hips tremble, immediately placing her hands back along his chest as she moaned, “Need you to touch me…” as she takes one of his hands, placing it along her throat, face warm as she does so.
He clutches his palm around her throat immediately, still holding onto her hip, spanking her again, “Like that? That’s what you want?”
She nods, “Mhm,” sucking in a breath as she feels him using her throat as leverage to hold onto her, her breathing going back to quick inhales, and slow, heavy exhales, “Yeah, baby…love when you touch me like that.”
He’s becoming impatient—he can’t help himself. He gives her a new way to move, pulling her feet flat along the bed, raising his hands higher under her thighs to have a good leverage on her, before he’s lifting her up, dropping her down, bouncing her on top of him, the harsh movement causing their skin to make a loud noise, the impact making Nozomi fully gasp. It causes her to place her hand behind herself along his leg, the other still in front of his chest. 
She understands what he wants, doing just that, moving her entire body as her ass recoils to the slam of his abdomen, something she entirely was too sensitive for, but powered through in order to feel the pleasure that came with it. Her head was down, whining as her lower body shook, dragging up and plopping back down, a heavy groan dropping from her lips as her hair fell around her face and shoulder. 
She squeezed the skin she held onto as she messily moaned, “Oh my goddd—baby. baby, yeah—“ she squeaks, connecting their hips in between, “I can’t….” She pants, “Feels so…aghh.”
“Yeah?” 
“Yeah.�� 
He was supposed to be letting her have her time on top, but he can’t hold back any longer. He growls against her skin, his voice almost a command, “Lean forward. Let me fuck you.” 
She leans into him, feeling as he wraps his arms around her lower back, his own hips thrusting upwards, the sound within the room like no other. Nozomi places her hand against his bicep, digging into the skin as she bleats, “Ooooh, shit, Toji—“ she gasps to herself, locking her hand over her mouth, shuddering wildly as she then wraps her arms around his neck as she cries, “Mmmm, wait, baby,” she whimpers out, unable to hold her voice back.
He buries his head into her neck, kissing, licking, biting, leaving a mark as he continues. 
“Nuh-uh, thought you could handle it? Thought you were a big girl?” He grunts in her ear, “Take my fuckin’ dick, big girl.”
He takes advantage of his movement, fully locking his arms under her legs, pulling her knees over his shoulders as she’s still on top of him. Her arms are still wrapped around his neck as he sits himself up a bit, holding her fully as he guides her roughly. His palms are hot as he holds the flesh of her ass, lifting her within the air as he yanks harshly, pussy sopping arousal as he slams her down onto his dick, his balls drenched in her cream.  Nozomi gasps against his mouth, blabbering cries faltering against his lips. She can only listen to the sounds their bodies create together, mewling in defeat. 
She pouts along his mouth as she whimpers, “Fuckin’ love you, babyy.”
He captures her lips with his own, his teeth gently tugging on her bottom lip as he grunts against her mouth, “Stop all that whining shit. Thought you hated me.”
She presses her forehead to his, “Don’t bring that up…” seeing how messy she was against him, her hand back in a deep grip on his hair. She goes silent for a moment, holding him close as she listens to their skin stickily connecting. But that didn’t mean he was done talking to her.
He moves himself slightly, shifting their position just enough for him to get a good angle to give a particularly aggressive thrust, enough to force a cry from her lips, “I know you fuckin’ hear me talking to you.”
Her heavy panting goes into a particularly long and raspy moan, her breath sucking in as she tries to fight it, back to pressing her forehead against his as she whimpers back, “Don’t hate you. Can’t hate you, when you’re fucking me like this…” she groans, eyes wanting to roll back again, “Sorry, baby…was so mean to you…”
He relishes in her groans, her whines, the way she’s unable to speak normally, the way she’s falling apart completely because of him. “You should be sorry. Now look at you.” 
He doesn’t halt at all, her small frame being carried effortlessly, lifting her up and down on his dick, his tip damn near reaching her throat. Her breathless pants are embarrassing to hear, but the squeal she makes when he swirls her hips down with a hard drop onto his hips, that's even worse. 
Her arms tremble as she tightens them around his neck, another aggressive moan pushing out her body, pleasurable tears triggering from that one. She gasps, “Oh my—“ she holds herself back, looking him in his eyes as she whines messily, “Forgive me, baby. So fuckin’ sorrry. Imsosorry,” cheeks hot as she listens to his arrogant laugh.
“Sorry, huh? You don’t mean it.”
“Mean it, baby. Fuck.” 
“It’s cause I’m fuckin’ you stupid,” he grunts, tugging her down, her walls gushing through his thrusts, spurting out suctions of air. 
She drags her tongue up his jaw, reaching his mouth as she pleads, “Said sorry already, baby. Know you wanna forgive me…”
He groans at that, keeping his composure as he talks to her, “Say you won’t be mean to me again,” he demanded against her lips, his grip on her hips tightening.
“Always gonna be nice to you, baby,” she whimpers, “Wanna be sweet to you…” she sucks on his lower lip, giggling in a way that makes her feel insane, so full of pleasure, she couldn’t even think.
“Yeah?” He asked breathlessly, his hands grasping a harsh and unforgiving grip on her hips, “You promise?”
“Promiseeee,” she moans back, “Fushigurooo,” she panics, gripping onto him, “I….my body…I feel numb.” 
She didn’t understand the feeling. She had experienced a certain amount of pleasure, but this was different. While all of this had been symphonies of pleasure, this was an entire orchestra. She was having her first orgasm.
“Just let it happen, baby.” He muttered against her neck, his lips against her skin, “It’s a good thing, I promise.”
Her entire body jolts, shivering in a defeated pleasure, a short scream releasing from her mouth as she holds onto him, her legs trembling as if she’d been electrocuted. Her knees shake over his shoulders as her eyes drop down to see her squirt against him, nails digging into his chest as she cried out, “Tojiii.” 
He presses his forehead to hers, his own body feeling like it’s on fire as she moans, “Ooh, fuck baby. You’re squirting. Keep cumming. Keep cumming. Keep. Fuckin’
Cumming,” he talks in between thrusts, sending her in a state of psychosis. 
The tears that drop from her eyes make her sob in pleasure, knowing his skin was welted with the way she clawed him, her face pressing into his neck as a warmth filled her cheeks. His brain is muffled as she whines, “Cum in me, cum in me. Cum in me.”
He tries to knock sense into himself, but with her in his ear, he grips her skin as he bottoms out, moaning as he cums to her voice. She made him insane.  
Both of them feel exhausted, but not as much as Nozomi. When she finally felt that her mouth wouldn’t release anymore shouts, her body still trembled as she whimpered, bringing her face deeper into his neck.
“Fuck, baby. You’ okay?”
She brings a hand over her face as she nods, unable to do anything else. All her vulnerability returns, realizing she was bare against him, realizing what’d she just done. What they’d just done. 
Her sudden shyness makes him careful. She’s vulnerable like this, and he wants to take the time to handle her, to treat her. He gently guides her body against his, rolling them so she’s against the mattress and he’s laid against her. He gently pries her hand away from her face, his fingers gently tracing over her cheeks. 
“Hey, pretty,” his deep voice greets her. 
Her face turns away, hiding within his shoulder for a moment. Silence goes between them as she softly says, “Hi.”
He lets out a soft laugh at her shy greeting, his hand gently rubbing the side of her body, his fingers gently tracing over her back. 
“You’ okay, baby?” He asked her stain, placing a gentle kiss against her temple, “You with me?”
“Mhm,” she replies gently, “I’m here.”
She whimpers as she feels him spank her attention to him, flicking her eyes as she says, “I’m just thinking.”
He can see the way she twitches from the smack, his voice dropping into a deep chuckle, “Thinking?” His tone is a tease, a playful taunt as he speaks, “I fucked you that good, huh?”
“Fushiguro,” she warns, “Jesus. Fuck off. Is this your way of pillow talk?”
“You’ got an attitude?” he raises an eyebrow.
He hikes her up as he growls into her neck, snatching her skin in a kiss that makes her giggle. She then says quietly, “I just…am curious to know what this means for us. Going forward…” 
She traces her finger over his chest, “If this just happened in the moment, or that you really wanted to be with me…”
The questions almost pissed him off. He’s never wanted anyone as much as he wants her. 
He suddenly captures her chin in his hand, bringing her face up to meet him as he spoke in a deep and serious tone, “I want you. I want all of you.”
The words are genuine, and her heart swells. She leans closer to his face as she grins, “Say it again.” 
She giggles as he raises her leg over his shoulder, spanking her again as he grunts, “I love you, Nozomi.”  
His words make her body warm, feeling as he gruffly kisses her neck, trying to prove his point. The way she smiles, the way the grin looks on her face…he’s completely smitten.  
“Say it back,” he grunts against her skin, his words like a breathless demand, “Say you love me.”
“I love me,” she says softly, giggling louder as he hovers over her now, growling against her skin as he spanks her a couple more times.
He chuckles against her skin at her sarcastic words, his hand gently digging into the flesh of her thigh as he pressed another possessive bite into the skin on her neck, just hard enough to make her squeal. 
“I swear. Say you love me, baby,” he teased her, nipping against her skin, “Please.”
She finally becomes serious, holding up his chin to look directly at her as she says, “I love you, Toji.”
A low groan drops from his lips as he captures her in a deep, hungry kiss, his mouth attacking her own as his hands tug at her body to pull her closer to him, “Again.” 
“I love you,” she muffled, giggling against his mouth, “I love you.”
His body is craving her even more after hearing her words, her voice a drug that’s suddenly driving him crazy, suddenly making him desperate and needy. His tongue forces its way into her mouth, desperate to fuck her. Eat her out. Something. 
She then pulls him back, “We need to get back to the reception before my sister kills me,” she giggles throughout his kisses, “Seriously, Fushiguro.”
He pauses, pulling back from her neck as he groans into her skin, pulling back to grumble against her skin, “Fine.”
“One more kiss,” he bargained with her, “Just one, before we go.”
“One,” she agrees, accepting the kiss from him. He then leans down, “Or two,” kissing her again, “Or three.” 
He can’t help but want to make her giggle. It had been so long since he heard it, he’d never make her stop. She sighs as she says, “Help me with this dress, please?”
“We’re really leaving? For real?” 
“Did you think I was joking?”
“A little.”
“Boy. Let's go.” 
“Didn’t you say you were gonna be nice to me earlier? You were like ‘aghhh, baby! imma’ be nice!’—“ 
“Fushiguro!” 
“…My bad.”
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ssahotchnerr · 11 months ago
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A holiday criminal minds fic would be so cute! Like, Hotch’s wife decorated the office while they’re gone for a case. They have secret Santa and Rossi dresses up as a reindeer idk 😭 I just think it would be adorable!
making spirits bright
hehe had to slip some girl!dad aaron into this <3 cw; fem!reader, domestic fluff
upon entering the bullpen after returning to quantico, aaron was anticipating action reports, concluding paperwork, following up with the precinct to ensure the case was settled properly - a long afternoon, so to speak.
but there you were, sitting in jj's chair patiently waiting. he had called you before the jet had taken off that morning, sent you a quick text when they had landed, and had been already calculating the minutes until he made it home. needless to say, he hadn't needed to count very long, his shoulders instantly relaxing at the realization.
your eyes brightened at the sight of him, quickly getting to your feet.
"hi sweetheart," aaron's face softened, his hand finding your waist momentarily to pull you in for a kiss hello. he was pleasantly surprised, but his brows still furrowed briefly in confusion at your unexpected presence. "this is a nice surprise, what are you doing here?"
"don't be mad," your eyes were nothing short of mischievous; a fiery, excited glint to them - you had been up to something. after offering a quick wave to the team as they too trailed in, you grabbed his hand, not wasting a second to pull him up the few short stairs, "i sorta 'broke' into your office."
"alright..." he went willingly, but spoke with a touch of hesitancy - not knowing what he was about to walk into. the possibilities were endless, especially when it came to you.
you flicked the lights on in his office, and it was just how he had left it a few days prior. the only difference now, a small christmas tree was set in the corner near the window. it was adorned with multi-colored lights, a star perched on top, and handmade ornaments - made of paper, felt, accompanied by a few pipe-cleaner candy canes. they were messily made, as they were created by a seven year old, but each special in their own perfect way.
the two of you neared the tree, and you waited a second before speaking, allowing time for aaron to soak it in.
but even with the moment of silence, aaron was still lost for words. he turned to you, a quizzical yet awed expression plastered on his face.
"jack worked on those for about... a month i believe? while you've been away and whatnot. i'm a bit surprised he didn't slip up and spoil the surprise, he was really excited." you laughed softly, your expression simply lighting up more.
"oh and this," you reached out, touching a circular, clay ornament. one that featured the tiny hand of your daughter, only a few months old and about to experience her very first christmas. "courtesy of baby girl. there's also one on our tree back home too - with jack's baby handprint - but i thought you'd might like one here as well."
aaron laughed breathlessly, the smile on his face widening.
"what do ya think?" you shyly asked as your arms wrapped around aaron's middle, peering up at him eagerly and cutely.
"what do i think?" aaron tossed his go-bag onto the couch, allowing him to wrap both his arms right back around you. he was still a bit dumbstruck, his eyes continuing to scan the tree, finding something new at each glance. "this is... i truthfully don't even know what to say."
"i- we just wanted to bring some christmas cheer to your office," you said, turning back to his surprise, the lights illuminating you softly. "i know it can be dreary and depressing and it just feels so cozy at home with our family tree. but you miss it when you have your long days, so this way, you're not missing out."
"this is exactly what was needed." aaron kissed your temple, and then your lips once in reach as your face lifted towards him again. "thank you. i love it."
"good, i'm glad." you grinned, your hand grazing his torso before finding his tie, your fingers playing with the length of it gently.
"but, we do have a problem."
your face pulled into a sheepish yet witty look, pulling on his tie the smallest amount, "that i broke into your office?"
"no," aaron laughed, shaking his head. "you're welcome to break in any time. the problem is, now i'm going to have a tree in here all year round. how can i possibly take this down?"
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wemlygust · 17 days ago
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wait why are we not crossing Danny Phantom over with Jack Frost (Rise of the Guardians)? Or importing Jack along with Danny into the DC verse. Tbh I don't really care about adding any of the other Rise of the Guardians characters, nor the Christmas themes, but Jack Frost would fit so well as just a random imported character into DP x DC fics. Consider: 1 - they're both cartoon dead kids, even of a similar age.
2 - Jack Frost's "belief creates/grants power to/allows living humans to see spirits" cosmology fits neatly into the ghost zone cosmology (at least for fanon versions, idk enough about canon), especially considering that one kid ghost that adults can't see in DP, and the Guardians all having "centers" that sound a lot like "cores". In this context, Jack Frost is perhaps a cross between a regular dead-human ghost and a neverborn? Like he died under his lake, and when his ghost formed it got all tangled up with the concept of winter/a nascent winter neverborn's formation, with the result that he's sorta the ghost equivalent of an irl human chimera (the result of twins merging together at an early developmental stage, resulting in the final human having different DNA in different cells/body parts but still being a single person). 3 - they'd make for fun friends or maybe frenemies or rivals I think.
4 - they both have ice powers.
5 - they both have a mega big bad enemy with a stupid/blatantly evil name - Pariah Dark and Pitch Black. They're so similar!! Like why not just chuck this third dead kid into the dp x dc mix? We could have, like, a triplets Danny & Damian & Jack Frost situation? Or a "both Danny and Jack Frost independently show up in Gotham at around the same time for different reasons, resulting in lots of confusing rumors and maybe a spider-man pointing meme" situation, maybe with extra "Dr. Freeze is concerned by the sudden influx of teens with ice powers into Gotham" situation. Heck, maybe also throw in the Todoroki family kids (My Hero Academia). Maybe Dabi and his sibs form a brand new Gotham mafia. Or just add the kids with ice powers only, and have an ice powers mega-crossover with all the fandoms featuring ice powered-characters you can think of. Freeze Gotham! I'm losing the thread here but anyway. Jack Frost x DP and/or DP x DC x Jack Frost. I want it.
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diremoone · 1 year ago
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the door with the floral wreath | r. sukuna
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when sukuna gets a new neighbor on the third floor of his apartment complex, he’s pleasantly surprised to see who it is behind the door with the floral wreath. her two cats on the other hand, are a massive fucking problem.
w — honestly nothing? save for fluff and some cussing, slowburn-ish, implied boxer & sorta rich! Sukuna, implied polyglot(ish)! reader, cat! Satoru and cat! Suguru and both cats being in love, cozy themed again (I can’t help it), the formatting of this “fic” was how it was in my brain so I’m sorry if it’s a lil strange haha, this apparently became longer than I originally anticipated lmao, reader is mentioned to be partially Japanese but no physical appearances are ultimately described, mild angst at the end
a/n: not apart of the ‘make me (yours)’ universe but it’s definitely inspired by it
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🌸 When Sukuna wakes up on a Saturday morning and opens his front door to leave for his morning run, the last thing he expects to see is a floral wreath on the door opposite of his. That can only mean one thing: someone has moved in. But if someone has, then why hasn’t he seen or heard the furniture being moved in? These aren’t exactly the cheapest apartments, so did they just not have anything?
It was weird, to say the least.
🌸 However, three months pass before he gets to see who the person who’s behind the door across from his.
🌸 Sukuna gets back from his jog a little early, the light sprinkles of rain turning into a downpour. That’s when he sees you leaving your apartment, locking the door to leave. Unfortunately, you’re not paying too much attention to your surroundings, and you two nearly collide into one another at the top of the stairs.
You narrowly turn in time to place yourself flat against the wall to avoid the behemoth of a man that was your neighbor from running over you and sending you both down the stairs.
“I’m sorry,” came your instant apology.
“It’s fine,” follows his gruff reply.
But he knows he certainly wouldn’t mind running into you again. Just not where you two can fall down the stairs and potentially break your necks.
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On a random day not too long after your initial run-in (and near subsequent dangerous tumble down some stairs), you two run into one another to get the mail at the front office.
You pop up behind him right after he opens his mailbox, staring up at him and his very impressive height and build and apparently scare him, because when you speak next, his shoulders jump. “Gosh, you’re tall. You must’ve played basketball or something in high school, yeah?”
He would’ve either been silent or retort something in an asshole tone like he was used to. He just didn’t like people.
He would’ve, if it wasn’t his cute neighbor.
“Volleyball,” he replies quietly. “Quit after graduation.”
You frown. “That sucks. You must’ve been good at it.”
“It was a pastime.”
“Sounds fun though,” you chirp, putting your own key into your mailbox. “I tried to get into sports, but uh, lack of things made it hard to do so. Did track for awhile, until my ribs couldn’t keep up.”
Sukuna lets out a snort but says nothing further. He goes to leave, but not before hearing, “G’bye, neighbor!”
Ah, shit. He hadn’t told you his name, had he?
Hopefully, there would be a next time.
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🌸 Sukuna doesn’t see you again for another month or two after that, fate still having you two separated like an awful slowburn romance.
🌸 What he doesn’t like in particular is the fact you don’t know his name and he doesn’t know yours. He doesn’t like that; doesn’t like that he’s missed his chance to know you a little better. By his logic, he should know your name, have your phone number, and have at least had you on a date and in his bed at least once already.
🌸 Come early December, he hears your door begin to open and close a lot. It becomes annoying, very very annoying, very very quickly.
That goes on almost until Christmas time.
Until one day he manages to catch the little reasons why your door has been slamming shut so much.
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Twerp Number One wriggles in his hold as he holds them both up to eye level. She grunts and huffs at him. “Put me down!”
To which he scoffs at. “And why should I do that?”
Just as Twerp Number Two decides to speak, your door opens. This time it’s you.
“You can let them down,” you say, clearly amused. “They’ve come for cookies.”
Sukuna grunts. “So that’s why they’re always slamming the door.”
“I’m sorry. I’ve tried to get them to stop. They are six, though.” As genuine as your apology is, Sukuna can see the little twinkle of mischievousness appear at the end of your sentence in defense of the two twerps.
“Mr. Sukuna is a big grump anyway!” the oddly-orange-haired girl says. “At least that’s what my mama says.”
“Nobara, you shouldn’t be calling people names,” you scold the girl. “Put them down so they can get some cookies and head back, please. I’m sure Nobara’s mom is wondering about them. Nobara, the white box is for you to take home.”
Sukuna begrudgingly obliges. Nobara and her friend barge inside your home. The door stays open thanks to a cold breeze, allowing for the smell of freshly baked chocolate chip cookies and cinnamon rolls to drift outside and into his nose. And damn does it smell nice.
“So, I finally know your name,” you muse.
“Ryomen Sukuna,” he says, half-correcting you, “but everyone just calls me by my first name.”
“I can see why,” you reply in a joking tone and smile. “But yeah… It fits you. I’m [Name], and pretty much the same: everyone calls me by my first name. Since my last name isn’t exactly normal, you know… Since I’m not inherently from Japan.”
Sukuna’s brows raise. “You’ve lived here before?” he asks.
“My mom is [part/full] Japanese,” you admit. And then to his surprise, you ramble on further, “I’ve popped around, uh, a few countries over the last several years of my life, Japan included. I’ve just… never stayed in one place to technically be from somewhere. I was born in the States, but… I don’t, uh, really feel like I actually am from there… Does that make any sense?”
“It does.” But he doesn’t go into his backstory in return. And thankfully, you don’t seem to mind, just about as much as you minded sharing such a part of your life to someone who’s technically nothing more than a stranger to you, not in the slightest.
Nobara pops back out with her friend, who’s just a touch older than her.
“Thank you for the cookies and cimmanom rolls, Miss [Name]!” Nobara says.
You don’t bother to correct her cute mistake. “You’re very welcome, Nobara. Now head home. Goodnight, girls.”
“Goodnight!”
You watch the girls descend, and when they’re out of sight, you listen carefully for the telltale of their first floor door closing. And when it thuds shut loud enough to wake everyone in the apartments in the block, you turn your attention back to the gigantic man that was your next door neighbor… Who’s attention was on your door, more than likely concentrating on the smell in your kitchen.
Your lips curl up and you prevent a giggle. “You want some?”
Your voice snaps him from his stupor. “What? Want what?”
“Some cookies and cimmanom rolls?” you question, cutely reiterating Nobara’s mistake.
“Uh…”
He takes too long to answer, so you decide for him. “I’ll get you some anyway.”
You go back inside, leaving him out in the cold. But you don’t take very long and come back out not even two minutes later with another white box and place it into his hands.
“Well,” you say, teeth chattering from the cold. “It’s nice finally knowing your name, neighbor. Maybe we’ll run into each other again soon… Goodnight.”
He barely gets out a “goodnight” before you close the door. Sukuna tosses his head back and settles for a heavy exhale rather than the audible sigh he knows you would’ve heard through your door.
Another fuck up. But at least he got some food out of it this time.
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🌸 You both end up meeting each other a lot more often by “coincidence” after that, like fate has finally determined you’re allowed to see one another or something. (To him that just sounds stupid, until it comes out of your mouth.)
For Christmas, you end up gifting him a tin of popcorn and another box of sweets by leaving them at a front door with a cute handwritten note.
🌸 Gradually, the two of you begin to interact more, and naturally gravitate toward each other’s energy and finally getting to know one another; he’s over at your apartment most of the time, it’s cleaner and smells at lot more nice than his (in his opinion). It’s not that he’s dirty, he’s quite clean actually. It’s just that he prefers your apartment to his.
🌸 You find out that Sukuna is about ten years older than you, and was almost a volleyball player that almost went pro, had it not been for his father’s death. He lost all motivation for the sport, and eventually settled for doing numbers for his father’s company, taking up boxing as a side hobby. To which he was more than good at.
A year ago, he moved into these apartments, getting away from the corporate world had had dived into, opting to do things from home rather than in-person. His prior neighbors never stayed around for too long, not with the amount of noise coming from his apartment in the middle of the night. You’re honestly surprised the person below him hasn’t moved out yet either.
🌸 For Sukuna, he finds out that you almost didn’t get to graduate high school because of how much you’d been moving around. You’d gotten depression from leaving so many friends behind so often that you just made graduation by the skin of your teeth.
Now, you’re online for college, majoring in linguistics, all while working as a translator for a special needs school of Japanese children that are deaf. Through that, he finds out you speak several different languages as well.
God, your personality is just as sweet as the goodies you bake, huh?
🌸 There is one problem, however, when he comes over: your goddamn cats.
🌸 The white Maine Coon is for sure out to get him and make his life miserable, with his attempts at wooing you almost a failed attempt every single time. His name is Satoru, and he’s by far the most obnoxious cat he’s ever fucking met.
Why on Earth you’d give a cat a human name is beyond him. But the again, the fucking cat acts so human it’s disturbing — it almost kind of makes sense.
🌸 Satoru’s claws almost end up in his ass every time he walks through the front door. He can’t even stand openly, but has to stay against a wall or sit on the couch so the cat doesn’t get his claws into his backside. And he can tell that that damn cat has a smug-ass smirk on his face every time. How a cat can smirk, he’s unsure; but he just knows that the look on his face is the one of a smug little shithead that knows he’s gotten away with being a menace. Thankfully, you’re aware of his tendencies and can tell when he’s being more of an asshole than other times and get onto him.
🌸 The black Maine Coon, Suguru, isn’t as terrible, but he opts to creepily stare down at Sukuna from his cat tower rather than be proactive in his distaste. He studies him every second every time he comes over, paying attention to every single detail and movement Sukuna makes with you.
He’ll do things more subtly than his white counterpart, like “accidentally” wave his long, black fluffy tail into his cup of water you gave him. He’s just as much of a menace, although you don’t get onto him as often like the white one, because while you know Satoru is more of an extroverted menace, you just seemingly can’t see that Suguru is just as awful. (Mostly because you don’t actually see it.)
🌸 This goes on for months and months, Satoru scratching the behind of his pants as hard as he can to make it rip and getting white fur all over his clothes, and Suguru glaring down at him from his tower and putting his paws in Sukuna’s food. Although it becomes a little less as often because they’re seemingly growing used to him, as if they’re seeing that he actually makes you happy and finally get the sense that he isn’t just going to break your heart and throw you away.
🌸 And the growing approval of your cats seems to mean a lot to you.
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“I picked them up off the streets,” you tell him after he asks about where you got the inseparable pair. “I found them as kittens in a cardboard box three years ago on the streets, drenched and matted in dirt and nasty water.”
You remember the day very clearly. It had just stopped raining, and just as you were about to head home, stopping at the vending machines before heading to your car, you heard animal-like cries of something small and weak. And sure enough, on the other side of the food machine, stuffed away in a tacky, ruined cardboard box, were two, rain-drenched kittens huddled together to keep warm.
That was the day you got two new cats, two new responsibilities. And although times got hard a few times, you’ve never regretted adopting them.
Sukuna gazes up at the two cats on the tower, sitting next to each other in the bed at the top. Their tails are intertwined, heads rubbing at each other’s necks lovingly. He would have never guessed that’s where you found them. From the looks of it, they he would’ve guessed they’d came from a pet store.
“So you’ve raised them since they were kittens,” Sukuna says. “They trust you with their lives. And looks like they love you unconditionally, too.”
“I’d like to think so,” you muse, sipping on your coffee. “Sometimes it doesn’t seem like it with how ornery they are.”
Sukuna keeps his eyes trained on the two cats in love. He’s slightly jealous, and no he’ll never admit it. He just hopes he can have that one day with you.
He just has to stop Satoru from ripping him a new one every time he comes through the door.
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🌸 Your cats eventually grow fond of having him over, fond enough that they’re not being the usual mischievous selves when Sukuna puts his arm around your shoulders and tugs you closer to him when you invite him over for movie nights, not trying to bite his fingers off (Satoru) or sit between you both (Suguru).
🌸 After a year passes and you and Sukuna know each other, he finally gets to take you on a proper date after manning up. Although it’s not a restaurant date, since he knows you hate being looked at while eating. It’s a picnic by the ocean, with the weather nothing short of perfect.
🌸 Your attempts to leave your cats at home for said date, however, are fruitless, the pair determined to come with you and your now-boyfriend who declares himself as such after dessert just to piss off the pair of felines. Sukuna plants a big fat smooch on your lips, turning you into a giggly mess.
🌸 They in return, somehow find a stray kitten and plop it in his lap in return. The kitten isn’t as bad off as when you found Satoru and Suguru, but he’s just as scared. He immediately imprints on your oversized boyfriend, who secretly takes an instant liking to the orange-red (honestly a little pink, too) baby cat and becomes a cat dad.
Date not necessarily ruined. But definitely not what he had planned.
🌸 After a week of having, he fondly named the cat a human name — Yuuji, and the fur baby took just as much liking to it as his owner did him. You do have to teach him the ropes and warn your boyfriend that he’d better be ready to have some of his stuff deep-cleaned if Yuuji doesn’t get to the litter box in time.
Satoru and Suguru take to the kitten like two doting parents. And as much as they still kinda dislike your boyfriend taking you from them, they still help train him to use the litter box. (Long story short, they felt bad after seeing you cry after they’d tore up [and peed] all over your third couch and quit being as ornery as they used to be.)
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A few months had passed since Sukuna got Yuuji plopped into his lap, since you two had become a couple. It was always amusing seeing your big boyfriend playing with such a small cat. Honestly, the cat looked like he was part tiger.
You feel overwhelmed with contentment. You have a good job, a wonderful boyfriend (who’s apparently secretly rich) who loves to give you kisses, and two cats who love you. You have enough now, so why was the universe trying to take that from you?
You don’t know how your ex got your number, but what you do know is that you have to tell Sukuna. No later than tomorrow.
You exhale. You can’t think about it. You’ll tell him. You’ll tell him tomorrow that your dyed blonde-haired ex wants to see you again. You’re hopefully of one thing though: that the moment your boyfriend meets your ex, you hope Sukuna has enough restraint to not beat the shit out of him.
“Baby, you okay?”
Sukuna’s brows are raised. One would miss the concern on his face if they didn’t know him as well as you do.
“Yeah… Yeah, I’m good.” Woman up, girl, you tell yourself. “I do have something to tell you later. Just… remind me before dinner.”
The concern becomes more evident on his face, which prompts you to walk to him and kiss him.
“It’s nothing serious… I don’t think. Don’t worry,” you reassure him, partially reassuring yourself. “What we should worry about is what’s for dinner,” you joke. “Don’t think I can eat those leftovers.”
“Goddamn, I’m sorry I put too much salt in it.”
You laugh, wanting this happiness to ever be trampled on. You’ll do what you can to protect and keep it.
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taglist:
@vagabond-umlaut | @poe-daydreams | @heresan @thedovahqueen | @lotus-n-l0ve | @chiyoso | @miraclecherryblossomsblog | @unbreakableblueheaven | @marscatbutler | @vanillabloo | @wo-ming-bai | @visionsofmagic | @tohsri
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parmahamlarrie · 3 months ago
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Welcome back to another post for the directory of fic recs on my blog! If you would like a specific theme or trope, let me know! As always, these are all fics I have read and loved, not all the fics out there. You can find more Fluffy fics here! **This post will be updated as I have more fics in this theme to recommend!**
Of Mates and Men || @bananaheathen || 630.4k Weddings, Strangers to Friends to Lovers, Hurt/Comfort, Fluff
knock, knock, I love you || beautlouis || 86k College AU, Virgin Harry, Fluff
With My Body and Soul, I Want You More Than You’ll Ever Know || BoosBabycakes || 58.8k   Strangers to Lovers, Mpreg Lou, So Fluffy
Homegrown || casuallyhl || 51.4k  Strangers to Friends to Lovers, Gardening, Fluff!
The Boys of Summer || @afirethatcannotdie || 45.2k Summer Camp AU, Secret Relationship, Fluff
Nothing Else But Us Right Here || supernope || 35.3k   Kid Fic, Single Dad Louis, Teacher Harry, Fluff
With A Little Kindness || @jacaranda-bloom || 33k KidFic, Mpreg Harry, Single Parent Harry, Rich Louis, Valentine’s Day, Fluff Frankincense-ational || @londonfoginacup || 31.5k Christmas, Librarian Harry, Firefighter Louis, Fluff and Humor
Has the Ocean Lost Its Way || @kingsofeverything || 28.3k Surfer Louis, Photographer Harry, Fluff, Slow Burn, Australia
daydream about me || louistomlinsons || 21.5k  Girl Direction, Famous/Famous, Fluff, Coming Out (sorta), Idiots to Lover
pink like the paradise found || @disgruntledkittenface || 18.4k  Girl Direction, Fluff/Smut
Everywhere and Nowhere || @2tiedships2 || 16.5k   Omegaverse, Neighbors AU, Courting, Fluff, Strangers to Lovers
balance between you and me || @beckydoesthings || 15.4k Omegaverse, Fluff and Humor, Courting Rituals, Demisexual Louis
The Sorority AU Series || louistomlinsons || 14.7k  Girl Direction, Sorority AU, Fluff and Humor
a picture of love, that’s this house || theprincessd || 13.5k KidFic, Domestic Fluff, Canon
Soup? || trackfive || 13.3k Canon, SickFic, Fluff
Mistletoe, Memories, and Mayhem || @jacaranda-bloom || 12.6k Established Relationship, Fluff, Humor
The Checkout || @silverstuff50 || 12.2k Omegaverse, Alpha Louis, Omega Harry, Awkward Flirting, Fluff
Bambi Legs || @disgruntledkittenface || 11.5k Girl Direction, Fluff, Coming Out, First date
Stumbling Into Your Arms ABO verse || @sunshineandthemoonlight || 11.3k - 2 parts Omegaverse, College AU, Train AU, Fluff
Faith and Trust and Pixie Dust || kotabear24 || 10.5k KidFic, Fluff, Meet Cute, Strangers to Lovers
Like a Picture Print by Currier & Ives || armadillosunset || 10k Christmas Fluff, Established Relationship, Knitting
Just the Start || @littleroverlouis || 9.6k Older Harry and Louis, Hair Stylist Harry, Fluff and Humor, First Dates
Find Me in the Kitchen || @neondiamond || 9.2k Omegaverse, Cooking Lessons, Fluff
Here We Come A-Wassailing || @lululawrence || 8.2k  Childhood Friends to Lovers, Christmas Fic, Fluff, Pining
Sun-Kissed Hurricane, Perfect Storm || iwillpaintasongforlou || 7.6k Nerdy Harry, ADHD Louis, Badboy Louis, Pining and Fluff
The Coach Tommo Universe || @enchantedlandcoffee || 6.8k Omegaverse, Kid Fic, Fluff and Smut, Bakery Owner Harry
I’m sticking to you like glue || peanutbutterapple || 6.2k  College AU, Sick Fic, Halloween, Fluff
I’ll Keep You Warm || @parmahamlarrie || 5.9k Neighbour AU, Winter Storm, Fluff
Won’t You Please Come Around || @allwaswell16 || 5.8k Meet Cute, Fluff, Strangers to Lovers
Everybody Wants You (And I Don’t Mind the Gold Rush) || @sunflouwerhabit || 5.3k Ice Skating, Fluff, Flirting, Meet-Cute
Love Mail || @neondiamond || 5k Neighbours AU, Fluff, Stress Baking
Stealing Flowers || @lululawrence || 4.8k   Strangers to Lovers, Meet Cute, Fluff and Humor
touch my neck and I’ll touch yours || gravitycentered, wigglesjoon || 4.5k Friends to Lovers, Roommates, Fluff, Intimacy
All I Need || @tommokat || 4.1k KidFic, Single Parent Harry, Therapy, Fluff
Somersault || @sun-lt || 4k Established Relationship, Comfort, Fluff
Wordplay 2023: there his charming nest doth lay || @bottomhaztoplou || 3.8k Omegaverse, Established Relationship, Nesting, Domestic Fluff
The Wrath of Gucci || louisunflower6 || 3.7k   Canon, Just fluffy, Some domestic bliss
Just a little taste || @lunarheslwt || 3.6k Vampire Harry, Established Relationship, Hurt/Comfort, Fluff
I’ve Been Running with the Wolves || RealityBetterThanFiction || 3.3k Werewolf/Shifter Harry, Human Louis, Established Relationship, Kidfic, Fluff
Just for you || @gaycousinlarry || 3.1k Canon, Fluff, Comfort
All The Way Home I’ll Be Warm || @justanothershadeofblue || 2.9k Friends to Lovers, Holiday Cards, Fluff and Humor
living love in slow motion || ashavahishta || 2.7k Canon, Fluff, Domesticity If Wishes Were Dishes || @londonfoginacup || 2.6k Domestic Fluff
Thesis Management || LadyLondonderry || 2.6k Werewolf Louis, Established Relationship, Fluff, Crack Fic
‘cause I built a home for you || angelsueavenue || 2.3k Omegaverse, Mpreg, Fluff, Nesting
Crowd Work || @littleroverlouis || 2.1k Stand Up Comedy, Banter, Fluff and Humor
Bless You! || @neondiamond || 2k Established Relationship, Kidfic, Fluff
The Wolf Wash || @haztobegood || 1.8k  Werewolves, Kid Fic, Fluff
Goodnight, Moon || @andtheywerebandmates || 1.6k Kid Fic, Established Relationship, Fluff
Wrap Your Legs Around Me || @evilovesyou || >1k Canon, Fluff, 2 Week Rule
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sturnioz · 19 days ago
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currently binging ur fics n stuff to distract myself from the election result <3 how are u btw baby!!
what type of gift would shy!reader / fb!chris get for eachother on christmas?? i have soo many ideas but idk which are most accurate.
sending endless amount of love and support <3
if shy!reader were to get something for chris for xmas ... hmm .. i feel she would either ;; • save up for a specific clothing brand he likes. • or maybe even tickets to his favourite artist. • make a box and fill it with all his favourite things, even put a few joints/blunts inside that SHE rolled herself (she'll be so proud of it too).
if fratboy!chris were to get something for bun for xmas .... • probably some lingerie or toys ... (even though its clear that he did that for him) • but hear me out, he would eventually see some things in stores that reminds him of her. so anything bunny related, something to do with 'dumb books' she likes etc etc. • and as much as he finds them creepy, he would sorta try to get her a sonny angel but ends up getting her a troll doll on accident or something.
i would love to hear your ideas though (probably better than mine pls tell me)
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spaghettiposts · 9 months ago
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Spaghettiposts - Masterlist
just your friendly neighborhood noodle with a pen
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- Request status: Closed (but you can still send some in!! I usually tend to do the ones that inspire me)
Characters I write for:
Wanda Maximoff
Tara Carpenter
Wednesday Addams
Cairo Sweet
Natasha Romanoff
More coming soon…
| Wanda Maximoff
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Oneshots:
Language Barriers | Fluff
Summary: In which you can't help but try to figure out what Wanda's been calling you in sokovian
/~/
Snowmen & Kisses | Fluff, winter special
Summary: Making a snowman with Wanda leads to her mouth on yours.
/~/
Through Thick and Thin | Sick fic, fluff, clingy witch, requested
Summary: “any chance of a fic where Y/N comes home to find Wanda sat on the sofa surrounded by tissues, shes all sniffly and is sneezing like 24/7. Y/N realise she has a pretty bad cold and takes care of her? Lots of fluff?”
/~/
Secrets Out | Established Relationship, fluff, a hint of spice, Requested
Summary: “Hi do fick like wanda (16/17 years) invites his girlfriend (reader) to komleksu avengers in the absence of the team but are caught (Avengers do not know that wanda has someone and ask for Clint in the role of slightly overprotective older brother / dad)”
/~/
All Me | Tooth rotting fluff, sleepy cuddly gf Wanda supremacy, author fav fic
Summary: sharing a cute moment with wanda under the sheets
/~/
Unspoken Truths | Unspoken Desires | Pregnancy fic, slight angst, fluff, friends to lovers, no powers au
Summary: You and Wanda have been friends for years, but never once has she showed up at your doorstep in this state. Pregnant, alone, and hurt. You take her in and you both dive into the difficulties of pregnancy, and hiding feelings.
/~/
An Outlaws Christmas | Cowboy au, established relationship, fluff, holiday special, many kisses.
Summary: Wanda’s father has never liked you, but that won’t stop you from delivering a special gift this season.
/~/
Devotion | Kinda dark Wanda? sorta established relationship, hurt/comfort, slight themes of possessiveness, she ties you to a chair.
Summary: You could never escape Wanda, much less the Scarlet Witch. Even bound to a chair, you couldn’t help but fall into her again. Your precious witch.
/~/
Window Crashin' | Fluff, WandaNat, Oblivious reader, seriously you're dense af, tooth-rotting fluff.
Summary: Crashing into the wrong window at night proves to be the best mistake you’ve ever made.
/~/
It's okay to need help | Hurt/comfort, angst, arguments, established relationships, wife wanda.
Summary: Snapping at your wife was the last thing you wanted to do, but between the pressures of financial disputes you do. You both seek to make things right.
/~/
5 times you slept in places you shouldn’t have + the 1 time Wanda dragged you with her | Fluff, too much fluff, slight feels angst, cuddling, buffoons in love, reader has sleeping issues and insecurities, hurt/comfort, author fav fic.
Summary: You’ve always had trouble sleeping, and Wanda’s always been there to see it.
| Tara Carpenter
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Oneshots:
A Fools Love | Ghostface!Tara, murder, slight mentions of gore, fucked up but we love her still, fluff, hurt/comfort
Summary: You're a fool who falls in love with Tara Carpenter, a fool who's hopelessly devoted to her. No matter what.
/~/
To Be Loved | Soft slow fluff, mentions of ghostface/attacks, injured arm, hurt/comfort, sweet love confessions, softness all around, established relationship, author fav fic
Summary: You’ve never known love, until Tara.
| Wednesday Addams
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Oneshots:
Video Games | Fluff, established relationship, slightly ooc wednesday, mentions of death yk the usual.
Summary: Video games are a waste of time in Wednesdays opinion, being with you however is not.
| Cairo Sweet
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Oneshots:
Picture to Burn | Angst, drinking, slight sexual content, friends to what the hell are we.
Summary: You should've known better than to fall for Cairo, your friend who seemed to have no interest in you, but it only takes one drink to mess things up and get you into her bed.
| Natasha Romanoff
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Oneshots:
Window Crashin' | Fluff, WandaNat, Oblivious reader, seriously you're dense af, tooth-rotting fluff.
Summary: Crashing into the wrong window at night proves to be the best mistake you’ve ever made.
264 notes · View notes
bfgunwook · 3 months ago
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bfgunwook's - nct fic rec masterlist ⋆.ೃ࿔
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JAEHYUN 𐙚🧸ྀི
boyfriend material. by @mochidoie
college student!jaehyun x gn!reader genre - fluff, fake dating cliche, strangers to lovers, slight angst wc - 6.2k
christmas puppy by @smileysuh 18+
best friends brother!jaehyun x fem!reader genre - uni/frat au, boy next door, christmas, secret romance, established relationship wc - 11k
he fell first, and he fell harder by @taurusdaylight
basketball captain!jaehyun x childhood best friend fem!reader genre - basketball captain au, college au, childhood best friends-to-lovers au, slow burn, mutual pining, angst with fluff wc - 18.7k
MARK 𐙚🧸ྀི
a series of white lies by @tyonfs
childhood best friend!mark x fem!reader genre - fluff, crack, high school au, best friends to lovers, childhood friends to lovers wc - 10.5k
elevator pitch by @luvhaos
frat boy!mark lee x fem!reader genre - college au, frat au, fluff, angst wc - 9.1k
day dream by @cozyjae
brothers best friend!mark x fem!reader genre - 90s au, brothers best friend au, fluff, collage au wc - 8.2k
RENJUN 𐙚🧸ྀི
blondes are done with fun by @rrxnjun 18+
journalism student!renjun x journalism student fem!reader genre - college au, acquaintances to lovers. angst, fluff, smut wc - 31k
JENO 𐙚🧸ྀི
resident himbo: operation heartbreaker by @just-some-random-blogger
university student!jeno x gn!reader (ft. university student!doyoung) genre - university au, puppy jeno, cool kid doyoung, fluff, pining, jealousy, angst wc - 3k
pussy blocked. by @luvdsc
college student!jeno x fem!reader genre - angst, comedy, fluff, fuckboy/girl, college au, mutual pining wc - 31.3k
reel by @tqmies 18+
friend!jeno x fem!reader (ft. romantic interest!sungchan) genre - romance, smut, comedy, friends to lovers au wc - 10k
HAECHAN 𐙚🧸ྀི
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rockstar!haechan x fem!reader genre - angst, smut, fluff, rockstar au wc - part 1. 22k, part 2. 18k
JAEMIN 𐙚🧸ྀི
take the stairs by @rrxnjun
college student!jaemin x fem!reader genre - college au, strangers to lovers, fluff, comedy, suggestive wc - 18k
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just-some-random-blogger · 2 years ago
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hello gorgeous! if you don't mind modern au, i have an idea. if you don't feel like writing anything it'd be great to hear your thoughts abt it. daemon x wife!reader (who's somehow connected with magic but not targaryen) who are devoted to each other like madly in love. before daemon has to go to war they're saying goodbyes kissing, crying and not being able to let the other go. feeling like something's off he says smth like "i'll find you in another life. i'll find you in any time we'll be existing. i will love you any time i am alive" (in high valyrian or calling her some name in it) kissing her knuckles and going away. unfortunately, he was right. reader died some way while he was away and he remains faithful to her for the rest of his life (oc but whatever) and in the modern world he does find her. maybe targaryens are some sort of royal family, maybe they keep a family business or an ordinary family with lots of relatives. but he fins the reader and they somehow just feel. sorry if it's too much. i'd really like to read something about it but it absolutely ok if you don't feel like it. thank u in advance! take care!
Waiting For A Lifetime
Part 1 2 3 ?
Daemon Targaryen x Reader + Aegon Targaryen x Reader cos it just sorta happened
Summary: Overcome by grief, Daemon turned to black magic to revive you. Moved by pity, the witch who casted the spell promised you would live until you met your love again in his next life.
Word Count: 3k+
Warnings: Modern AU, fem!reader, mentions/depictions of death/still birth/war, my pretty boy aegon whom i would die for, angst, fluff, typos, etc.
A/N: i saw this last night when i woke up in the middle of my sleep and couldn't stop thinking about it. I changed a lot about your req nonnie. I do hope you still like it though. I absolutely could not help myself with this one and I got so carried away T_T also a lot of facts about the Targaryens have distorted so just just just roll with it ok ok ok thank you And yes i know this is a gif from the crown but i love it so much the hat falling off the kiss ITS EVERYTHING I WANT TO BE HERRRRRRRRRRRRR also i do acknowledge the fact that this anon came to me with this idea after i reblogged this amazing moodboard sooooo yeah i think this post sparked this fic idea lol ALSO ALSO ALSO 2022 MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!!! LOVE YA ALL imagine seeing this post in like 2032 or smth shit thats like 35 years from now Tagging: @pinksirensong @deniixlovezelda @targaryenmoony pssst i made p2 "Never Before"
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Daemon's face was streaked with tears and sorrow. His eyes were bloodshot and his voice was as sure as it was grave as he repeated the word he uttered to the shaman, "anything."
She looked at him, able to taste the desperation in the air, "even if it costs your life, prince?"
Daemon looks at his love before him, his love that was carrying his child. He places his bloody palm on the gaping wound on her stomach.
"Your child will not live even if she does."
Daemon screws his eyes shut tightly. He begins to quiver in anger, in grief, in pure sorrow. He mutters, "anything," he slowly opens his eyes to gaze upon her lifeless face, "better it me than her. There is no world worth living without her."
The woman narrows her eyes at the prince. She knew he was the Targaryen, once heir, known to be rugged and harsh. The Rouge Prince. Yet, there was no trace of malice within his being, only what she would describe as true devotion, true love.
"So, may it be done by the gods old and new," she says, drawing the prince's attention to her, "I will plead for her soul that she may live."
Daemon watches the witch, as she stands to her feet from the ground they were both sprawled on, in front of the body of the dead woman.
"I will plead that she may live long enough to meet you again in another life, so that you may have the love you have now once more."
"Another life?"
"Yes," she says, "the gods recreate humans they are pleased with to grace the earth again. I am certain they will let you be reborn to be with her again. I will make it certain."
Daemon grabs the cold hand that was beginning to stiffen.
"Although, I am unsure if they will allow you to remember her."
"I will remember her," Daemon retorts, kissing the hand of his love, "I will remember her no matter form I take... I will, I must."
"So it remains to be seen," she says before speaking out her incantation.
And it would not be seen until nearly 2000 years later.
The times have changed drastically. Women wore pants and voted. Men where made to take more responsibility for their actions, though still got away with things.
And yet...
... my love for him never faded.
Every prince that was born and named Daemon, I hoped would finally be him. It went about like this century after century, war after war, plague after plague, rise after fall. I had feared the Targaryens would die out, but they proved to be as strong as the very foundations of the earth.
And it took the televised of the marriage of Viserys XXIX to Duchess Aemma of Eyrie for me to see the face of my love: Daemon, the Wild Child, the Knight of Knickers, as penned by the press. Ultimately, the prince of my heart.
I burst into tears when I saw his cheeky face as he nudged his brother at the isle. I pressed my hands on the screen, thinking to myself, the wait was finally over, he was finally here.
All that was left was for me to meet the Prince of Valyria.
Yes. That would be no problem at all.
Except it was, because Daemon was just as mad as he was in this life as he was in the last.
After all, he did not get those nicknames from the press for nothing.
I used up so many of my resources to even just get a glimpse of him. It was hard to catch him in one place. I mostly caught him with a scandalous headline in the cover of magazines and newspapers.
Tonight, it was a newspaper.
"You know," the bartender taps his finger on my newspaper that was sprawled out on his bar, "he's a frequent here."
I turn to the blonde, in his white dress shirt, black waist apron, and black slacks. I raise a brow as he purses his lips as though the information was ground breaking. He wipes on a glass with his blue towel.
"Gee, Aegon," I lean on the surface before me, "I would have never guessed that from the picture on the wall."
I nod at the said picture. It's one of Daemon and the current owner of the bar, Tywin Lannister, who also happened to own Lannister Land Corp, shaking hands. Oh, Lannisters.
"Hey," Aegon shrugs, pulling his lips down in a nuff-said manner, "it had to be said, since you're literally the only patron here that has not interrogated me with questions about the Knight of Knickers."
I snort, "then allow me to change that," I rest my head on my hand, "is he truly so dashing that his looks practically steal the knickers of the ladies around him?"
Aegon finishes buffing his glass and puts it down, looking up in thought, "mmm, I think it's mostly cause he's a prince that he's got the effect he's got. I've got no idea what possessed the first girl to throw her panties at him."
I giggle, "are you saying the prince is ugly?"
"Bit harsh, innit," Aegon pulls back, getting another glass, rubbing it down with his towel, "your words, not mine."
I roll my eyes, shaking my head, as I laugh at the light haired boy's muses, "you know, if we had been living at the height of the Targaryen rule, Daemon would have had your head for that, pretty boy."
"Gods, to be beheaded," he sighed, "a dream, rather than working here, taking about some monarch who lives off the money of the people."
I snort once more. Aegon's face softens as he breaks into a laugh himself.
"No, but honestly," he says putting down the glass and the towel, "you, my dear, are my saving grace. The highlight of my begrudgingly stretched out day," he stretches out a hand to me.
I chuckle at him as I take his hand. He presses a kiss on the back of it, making me grin at him in amusement.
"You're the only sane person here," he releases my hand, "everyone else is so desperate to brush shoulders with the prince, or simply even catch a of whiff of his flatulence."
I break out into a fit of chuckles, slamming firmly at the wood between us.
"No, I'm serious! I heard the fittest gal, a total bombshell, boasting with pride about how she managed a sniff of the bloke's fart."
I'm wheezing with laughter, unable to believe what I'm hearing.
Aegon releases a deep and dramatic sigh, "what has the world come to?"
I wipe a tear as Aegon watches me empty myself of laughter. His face crinkles in a pleased expression, Adam's apple bobbing as he chuckles airily.
I sigh, catching my breath, "well, if I ever become that desperate, I ask that you pray for my soul."
Aegon presses his palms together, "praying for that girl as we speak."
I chuckle, folding the newspaper before me, "I must say, I am actually desperate to meet the wild child myself."
Aegon drops his hands along with his humored expression.
I cannot help but laugh at him as I continue to fold the paper, "though, I would say I am the desperate kind that is so desperate..." I eye him as I press the grey material together, "that I, somehow, dread to meet him at all."
Aegon snorts, screwing his eyes shut as he wipes his face, "the Stranger. Don't say things like that! I nearly had a heart attack believing you."
"No, but it's true, Aegon!" I say with a faux wounded pout, "prince Daemon is my great love, we have been destined to meet for millennia!"
Aegon leans on the table, humming as he nodds his head, "yes, and I suppose I am Aegon the Conqueror."
I lean towards him and grab his jaw, "no, you look more like Aegon II. The spitting image, I dare say."
He scoffs, swatting me off, "I'm hotter than him."
I pull away, "yes. That I can agree with, pretty boy. Personal hygiene does wonders."
Aegon snorts and plays off the blush on his cheeks by wiping his nose with his thumb, "you speak as though you met him."
I straighten up, "that's because I have. He was once my nephew."
He narrows his eyes and crosses his arms. His face contorts at the thought.
I raise my brows at him, "have I not told you I am not only a Targaryen historian, an expert at that, but I am also a patron of the Museum of Ice and Fire? I'm married into their family."
"Okay," he raises a finger, "ew."
I snort.
Aegon lifts his jaw and hums, "well, now that you mentioned it, I always knew you were one of those insanely rich blokes who frequent here. I was thinking you were a mafia boss or something though."
I scoff in amusement, raising my brows at him.
He pushes his white sleeves up then raises his hand in defense, "you have a very intense aura about you."
"That's because you trigger my fight mode," I retort.
He huffs, "do I? I'm scared to know what you'll do to me when I've seen what you do to men who hit on you."
"Aww, don't worry," I coo, "I wouldn't hurt my pretty, baby boy."
Aegon doesn't get to reply when a customer calls his attention. With this, he pulls away and leaves me to my own devices.
We don't get to continue our conversation at all, for it was clear that the rush hour had begun.
I eventually pulled back and decided to entertain myself while my favorite bartender was busy. I swiveled on my stool, looking out to the room, spotting the jukebox collecting dust in the corner. I smile at the sight of it, thinking about how it was still here after all these years, in spite of being older than Aegon.
I stand from my seat and walk over to it.
Aegon, finding one patron missing, frantically looks around then calms, raising a brow.
I place my hands on the jukebox, bending over to check if it was plugged in.
Aegon snorts as he hands a man a beer, eyes not at all fixed on him, "that doesn't work, love."
"Mmm, ye of little faith."
Aegon is annoyed by the man that sits on the vacated stool, blocking his vision. In retaliation, he blocks out the sound of his voice. Aegon calls out, "if you can make that hunkajunk work, I'll clear your tab for you."
I chuckle as I pull the machine forward, checking its wiring, "I wouldn't want to make a kid working on minimum wage to pay for me at all."
"I only said I would clear your tab, doll face," is all he replies before he goes back to tending to drinks again.
I break into chuckles as I fiddle with the wires on the back. I admit, it took me quite a while to go through everything, which was why Aegon warned that he would not call an ambulance for me if I got electrocuted.
The sight of the jukebox coming to life was enough to shut him up.
I get to my feet with a huff, brushing my hands off with each other. I turn to Aegon, who was already looking at me in astonishment, along with a few other people in the room.
I smirk, "my tab then?"
"Good as gone," Aegon shakes his head in disbelief, cutting his hand across his neck.
I release a satisfied sigh as I punch at the hardened buttons and play whatever it was that was available to be played.
When the music starts, I close my eyes and allow myself to drift off with the music. The sound brings back some memories I had in the 1940's. If I recall correctly, it was around this time Daemon's father, King Baelon, was crowned.
I slowly moved to the rhythm of the song, swaying my hips, waving my extended arms out as I made my way to the center of the room.
Aegon stilled in his spot upon seeing this. His breath caught in his throat and he was only brought back to reality when someone demanded a gin. He looked around the room as he poured that idjit his drink and clenched his jaw tightly when he saw the onlooking crowd.
He snorts loudly, grabbing his towel, throwing it over his shoulder roughly, clearing his throat with more noise than necessary.
I smile to myself when I hear Aegon's familiar coughing. He had a tendency to do this whenever men around me started to be a bother. And I loved him dearly for it. He was a sweet boy.
With my eyes still closed, I continue dancing to the soothing song. My smile grows bigger when a section comes that tickles my musical senses. I chuckle as I twirl in my spot.
When I felt a hand come to my waist, I didn't have to open my eyes to know it was Aegon. He wouldn't have let anyone come near me at all without barking up a storm.
I hummed at the scent of him, familiar yet foreign to me at once. He must have changed his cologne. I prefer this one better. He pulls me close when I reach out to him, grabbing one of his hands and placing a palm on his shoulder. His dress shirt is softer than what I imagined it to be.
I am surprised when he leads us into a ballroom dance. In fact, I am so shocked, I open my eyes and see a blur of his white shirt and blonde hair as he spins me around.
I break into a fit of chuckles, screwing my eyes shut in pure bliss when he dips me, "I had no idea you were a dancer, pretty boy."
"Yes, well, journalists don't find it interesting enough to write about."
My eyes burst open at the sound of the deep voice.
My heart is pounding at the sight of the smirking man with silver hair. I nearly faint at the violet irises so close to mine.
"I do say," his hot breath fans on my face, "if we were spotted by one now, they'd have a field day."
I jolt upright and shove the man away. He doesn't seem to be offended by my harsh actions, and, in fact, chuckles as he reels back from my action, "not what I had expected and not the reaction I usually get, but there's a first for everything."
My breath hitches when he smiles at me. I turn from him, to Aegon, who was staring coldly from his place behind the bar. It seems the rest of the people here were doing the same as well, gobsmacked by the presence of the man in the middle of the room
I roll my shoulders back, turning to my dance partner, "Prince Daemon," I mutter, bowing my head slowly, "pardon my rudeness."
He chuckles, waving me off as he stuffs a hand in his pocket, "oh, no need to be so formal, my dear. I can understand the shock," he tilts his head at me, lips still curved, "you surely weren't expecting to be dancing with the prince and thought me to be someone else, no?"
I look at him and stare in silence. For the first time in my life, I was at a loss for words.
Everything was suddenly so real, and it was making my mind and my heart race.
Aegon watches this and clears his throat loudly.
It does not help anyone.
Daemon raises his brows at me in expectation, placing his other hand in his pocket as he leans on one leg.
I open my mouth. A second passes before I mutter, "I thought you were my pretty boy."
His lips spread into a toothy grin. Airy chuckles leave him, "I can be your pretty boy."
When he extends his hand out to me, it was like the heavens opened and I could hear the angels sing.
This was the moment I have been waiting for since that day that I came back to life and kissed him goodbye with a promise of finding him in his next one.
My breath was heavily taxed when I lifted my hand.
My soul nearly leaves me when I jolt in shock over the sound of a record scratching and jumping, repeating over and over again.
In that moment, I am hit by an epiphany. I am so overwhelmed with emotions that I could barely breathe. The sight of Daemon before me brought tears to my eyes. This was all I ever wanted, and yet-- and yet-- I was drowning. I could not breathe properly.
"I..." I shudder, making Daemon's face fall, "I have to go," I mutter through a strained breath.
Daemon knits his brows, shifting in his spot with his hand still out, "what?"
Aegon watched with tightly knit brows as I ran out of the room.
The prince drops his hand and spins on his heels, eyes locked on the runaway. His nostrils flare as his face contorts in confusion, "wait! Stop! Where are you going?!"
I heave heavily as I push past people on my way out. I am absolutely winded when I exit the establishment, hands shivering from both the cold and the nerves that were getting to me in this moment.
I walk aimlessly farther out, down to the lawn that was now dark, since it was gods-know-what hour.
"Wait!"
My heart drops.
I spin around when someone grabs my wrist. My heart is still quick in my chest when I see Daemon, heaving. His short, light hair was slightly tousled in its place. He knits his brows at me, tilting his head, "you dare leave your prince, Cinderella?"
My jaw hangs low.
He releases a sigh, shaking his head, "I forbid it."
Seeing him here and now made everything feel more Real with a capital R.
Daemon adjusts his grip on my wrist, pulling his hand back, so that he was now holding my hand.
I look at him, blinking the glassiness of my eyes away, still in shock of his presence. A million questions were running through my head, and I was glad to be able to even have the mind to ask one in this moment, "do you know me, Daemon?"
He tilts his head upon hearing this, brows knitting, lips curving. He releases a chuckle at the lack of formality and how haphazard the question was, but finds himself further drawn because of it, "no," he shakes his head, "but I would love to know you."
Hearing the words come out of his mouth shatters something in me.
He did not know me.
I turn away from him as I try to even my breath. I retreat my hand and step back as a shiver runs down my spine.
And yet here he was, chasing after me.
Daemon steps forward to make up for the space between us, "don't leave. Come back inside with me. I'll give you my coat, then you can boast that the prince of Valyria gave it to you."
I continue stepping back as I shake my head, "you don't understand," I mutter under my breath in High Valyrian.
"Then make me understand," he retorts in the same tongue with a chuckle as he shakes his head and takes a wide stride over to me, grabbing my hand again.
I gasp at the warmth of his touch. When I turn back to him, tears have finally fallen from my eyes.
Daemon's face hardens at the sight of it. His hand reaches out to my face, wiping the wetness away. The sight of his torn expression tears at me, bringing me more tears.
"Why are you crying?" he asks in High Valyrian.
I do not get to reply, as suddenly there is a loud burst from behind us, commanding both our attentions.
It's Aegon. He busted through the door with my things in his hand. Upon catching the sight of the two of us, he freezes, breathing heavily as the looks out.
Daemon's expression hardens; his grip on me tightens. He turns to me, jealousy coating his mouth when he catches I where I am looking, "is that your pretty boy?"
I do not reply to him as Aegon walks over.
Daemon pulls me close to him. I look up at him with teary eyes. Aegon looks between us, jaw tense as he hands me my bag, coat, and newspaper.
"Thank you, bartender," Daemon dismisses, patting Aegon on the shoulder, before turning from him to face me again.
When I catch Aegon's face, I finally have the wits to move.
I pull away from Daemon to put my coat on. I swallow a heavy lump in my throat at feel of the stares of the two men.
Once I have my coat on, I pull a card from my bag, handing it to Daemon. He wastes no time in taking it from me, immediately scrutinizing it.
"I'd..." I start, taking a deep breath, "like to see you again."
Daemon's eyes dart to me, breaking into a smile.
Butterflies explode in my stomach at the sight of him.
Aegon's face tenses.
I release a breath before asking, "when are you fr-"
"Whenever," Daemon blurts. He places the card in the breast pocket of his white shirt, "I'm free whenever."
I nod slowly at his words, "I have work tomorrow, but I do have a long lunch at 12-
"I'll call you a 11:55."
I purse my lips at his words, trying to hold back my chuckle, but failing, "11:55?"
Daemon grins, nodding once, "on the dot."
I chuckle, turning to my feet as I nod at his words, "11:55 then."
"On the dot," he nods, extending a hand out to rub his thumb on my cheek.
I turn to him just as Daemon pulls away and stuffs his hands back in his pockets, "I'll walk you."
I shake my head, turning to Aegon, who was still standing there, watching the whole interaction between us, "you don't have to. I have a car parked nearby."
"Then I'll walk you to your car."
I turn back to Daemon, who then offers his arm out to me. I smile, unable to deny him, or myself, of the offer. I take his arm, and the next moment, he leads us off.
I turn over my shoulder, raising a hand at Aegon while I offer him a smile, "see you, Aegon."
Aegon watches as I turn back.
There is a twisted feeling inside him that grows. He mutters softly. It is too soft for anyone but himself to hear, "see you."
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babybluebex · 6 months ago
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venus masterlist
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𝐒𝐔𝐌𝐌𝐀𝐑𝐘: you couldn't be any less of a stereotypical student at barton academy— after winning a coveted lottery, you attend the school as its first female student. not everything comes up roses for you, though, as you have to deal with prickish boys, curmudgeonly teachers, and a family emergency that strands you at the school over christmas. as you navigate your crumbling life, you're left to wonder: can you come out the other side unscathed, and can you possibly get angus tully to shut the fuck up? 𝐏𝐀𝐈𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐆: angus tully (the holdovers, 2023) x fem!reader 𝐓𝐀𝐆𝐒: canon compliance (this is a complete rewrite of the film, just with the added reader insert), lots of swearing, 70s ideals about feminism (which YES is a warning), mentions of grief/loss, more specific tags are listed at the top of every individual chapter, but these are sorta the blanket tags for the entire fic :) 𝐀𝐔𝐓𝐇𝐎𝐑'𝐒 𝐍𝐎𝐓𝐄: since there's now gonna be more than 2 parts, here is a masterlist so u can access all the parts :) also down below is a playlist i made that sorta is just like a bunch of songs either from the movie or time period OR songs that make me think of the fic
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part 1 part 2
spotify link
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whataperfectwasteoftime · 2 years ago
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Spring Fling
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(gif by @pedropascalsx. I've given up using Tumblr gif search)
Pairing: Marcus Pike x virgin f!Reader
Rating: E (explicit smut, 18+ only)
Word Count: 19,228. Oops.
Warnings: Significant age gap (almost 20 years), college-age reader, sexual tension, mentions of: strained familial relationships, divorce, unhealthy breakups, stalker(ish) behavior (PAST), therapy. Virgin/inexperienced reader, fingering, oral sex (f! receiving), unprotected PIV sex and a lot of it, comeplay if you squint, Marcus’s filthy filthy mouth, happy ending
Summary: When you and your friend, fellow pre-Law student Emma, plan to go to Washington DC for spring break instead of the typical beach destination, she makes plans for the two of you to stay with her estranged father for the week to save money on lodging. You never expected Emma’s father, a man she says she’s barely seen throughout the years, to be so sweet, so troubled, and so unfairly pretty. Neither did you expect for what you'd thought was a one-sided attraction to turn into a spring fling... or maybe something more.
A/N: I got an ask asking about 'Best Friend's Dad' Marcus Pike, so I now post a question to you, dear reader: What if Marcus Pike had a college-age kid from his first marriage, one that he'd entered into at a very young age because of an unplanned pregnancy? Anyway to find out the answer read this almost 20k fic LOL
Masterlist
"We should go somewhere for spring break."
Your friend and fellow pre-Law student at the University of Texas, Emma, laughs. "Go somewhere? Like what, the fucking beach? And with what money?"
"No, no beaches. Somewhere cool. Somewhere unusual."
"Like what?" Emma asks, shoving another handful of chips in her mouth.
"I've never been to Washington, DC," you comment thoughtfully.
"I thought every public school in the entire country went to DC at some point," Emma remarks. 
"I had the chickenpox."
"Ew."
"Do you think that would be fun? Going to the Capitol for break?" you ask.
"I guess," Emma shrugs. "It's better than going to writhe on the beach with fifty thousand wasted twentysomethings."
"There's still the issue of how to pay for a trip. For any trip. I think I could cover airfare, but a DC hotel? Ugh," you say with a groan. 
"I could put the hotel on my credit card and work a bunch of extra shifts at Pizza Express afterward to make up for it," Emma says. "But that would pretty much max out my card."
"I can look up the cheapest spots outside the city," you suggest. "And we can take the metro in."
"Outside the city isn't going to be much better," Emma remarks. "We could… nah."
You look up, curious. "We could… what?"
"Well, my uh, my dad actually lives in DC."
"Your dad?" you repeat incredulously. "You've literally never mentioned your dad. I thought he and your mom were estranged?"
"Sorta," Emma says. "The official story is that they married too young and eventually separated."
"...And the unofficial story?"
"My mom found out she was pregnant at nineteen, and my dad wanted to do the right thing, so he married her. But I guess they weren't right for each other, because they were already divorced by the time I was two."
"Do you see him much?" you ask.
"I used to," Emma says quietly. "But my mom was never really enthusiastic about spending much time together, so it wasn’t very often. And then he moved to DC when I was a junior in high school, and I haven't seen him since. He always sends me cards on my birthday and Christmas, though. And…" she suddenly blushes, looking down and away.
"What?"
"Nothing."
"What, Em?"
"He pays for my tuition."
"What?!"
"Yeah, I've barely had to take out any loans. It's just for housing and stuff."
"You ass, you never told me that!"
"It's not common knowledge," Emma mumbles. "Besides, no one wants to admit they've got an absent, divorced father paying the bills."
"But you'd want to contact him for this? For a place to crash over spring break for a week?"
"He's nice," Emma says quietly. "I always got the feeling that he wanted to do his best by us."
"I mean, if you're cool with it, it kinda sounds fun," you admit. "Better than Galveston, anyway."
Emma laughs. "Yeah, way better than Galveston."
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"Holy shit, Em, you can see the Capitol from here." 
The two of you had emerged from the underground tunnel of the metro station, trailing suitcases behind you, into what feels like the middle of the city itself. The busy street is flanked with large condominiums on both sides, with--unbelievably--a view of the Capitol building in the distance.
"I think it's this one," Emma says, squinting at the address on her phone and back up at one of the buildings. 
"How do we get in?" you ask. 
"He just said to text him," Emma answers. "Hang on." She taps out a message on her phone before sliding it back into her pocket. "And now we wait."
You barely have time to check your email before the front door opens and a man emerges, striding quickly toward the two of you. You think he's about to envelop your friend into a crushing hug, but he stops short, eyes wavering with uncertainty as he looks his daughter up and down. His hand reaches toward her arm, but he hesitates just short of touching.
"Emma," the man breathes, the emotion evident in his voice making you want to duck your head and turn away from the scene. 
"Hey, uh, Dad," Emma says, giving him a sheepish smile. "Been a while."
"It's been six years," the man says emphatically. 
"Yeah."
You watch as Emma's father's fingers twitch toward her. "C-Can I–" 
Emma shrugs. "'Course."
The man carefully steps forward and wraps his arms around her, pulling her to his chest. His eyes close, his eyebrows pull upward to reveal a deep crease in between them as he holds his daughter for apparently the first time in six years. This time, you do look away from what feels like surprisingly tender and private moment. 
"I'm sorry I wasn't there for your graduation," you hear him say softly. "I was undercover for a case, and… Anyway, it doesn't matter. I'm sorry. You don't know how badly I wanted to be there."
"S'okay," Emma says cooly. She steps back, and, for the first time, her father seems to notice you. 
"Hi," he says brightly, and his pained, heartfelt expression melts into an easy smile as he extends his hand to you. "Marcus." 
You don't know what you had been expecting. Maybe someone older. Maybe someone less… attractive. Not this frankly gorgeous man, with his boyish smile, pretty eyes that crinkle around the edges, slightly mussed brown hair that falls over his forehead, and the light smattering of facial hair that only seems to soften his features further. Not that he needed any help, in that respect. Slightly stunned, you step forward and take the man’s hand, trying not to trip over the syllables of your own name.
Marcus’s smile widens, and he repeats your name, which does nothing to quell the sudden burst of butterflies in your stomach–and are your palms sweating?
"Thank you for allowing us to stay for the week," you say politely, forcing yourself out of the trance.
"Not a problem," Marcus answers. "What a great destination for spring break! Whose idea was that?"
"Mine," you say with a little laugh. 
"My kind of girl," Marcus jokes. "Keeping my daughter out of trouble."
"Dad," Emma groans. "I'm not a kid."
"Well, last time I saw you, you were fifteen," Marcus says pointedly. "You're gonna have to let my brain do a little catch-up, here."
"Well, to start with, I'm not a beach party kind of person," Emma says. "I'm a nerd–y'know, being pre-Law and all."
Emma's father beams. "So I've heard. Well, I'm happy to host two nerds while they do a little sightseeing in the nation's Capitol. I can even," he adds with a conspiratorial smile, "give you a tour of the J. Edgar Hoover building. If–If you want," he finishes awkwardly, appearing hesitant and unsure again.
"Oh, cool!" you exclaim automatically, without thinking.
Marcus grins widely at your enthusiasm, and you find yourself staring at your shoes, biting your lip as you flounder under his attention. You're being weird. Stop it. 
"Y-Yeah," Emma adds, nodding hesitantly. "That would be nice... Dad. Thanks."
“C’mon,” Marcus says, grabbing both Emma’s bag and, before you can protest, yours. “Come on up. I ordered some pizza for everyone. You can get settled tonight and… go do whatever you two want to do in the morning.”
The two of you follow Marcus through the lobby and into the elevator. You can’t help but keep stealing little glances at him–the way his shoulders fill out the maroon henley he’s wearing over jeans, the way those shoulders taper down to narrow hips, the way he’s got the top two buttons of his shirt casually undone, showing you a hint of collarbone that has you damn-near salivating. Snap out of it. Oh, God, snap out of it. You’ve known the man for five minutes, and you feel like you’re losing your mind. It’s gonna be a long week if you don’t pull it together. 
Marcus opens the front door and gestures the two of you in before him. You stand awkwardly in the living room, looking around at the furniture and at the decor on the walls, looking anywhere but at your best friend’s dad, whose very presence seems to fluster you beyond all reason.
“I just have one spare room, hopefully you two don’t mind sharing…?” Marcus asks.
“That’s fine,” Emma says good-naturedly. 
“It’s just through here,” he says, walking past you. “I’ll set your bags down in there and show you around.”
The room is clearly his workspace–there’s a desk and a chair shoved into a corner to make room for a comfortable-looking guest bed. The side wall is covered with floor-to-ceiling bookshelves, and you subconsciously step toward them, eager to see what titles this man keeps on his shelves.
“Sorry, it’s kind of an… all-purpose room,” Marcus says sheepishly. “Bit cluttered.”
“I like it,” you murmur absentmindedly, still scanning the spines.
“‘Gardner’s Art Through the Ages’” Emma reads, crinkling her nose. “How many editions of this book do you have?”
Her father laughs. “It’s work stuff, mostly. Although there’s a few thrillers here and there. And some classics.” He approaches the shelves as well, and you can feel the hair on the back of your neck start to stand up on end at the sensation of his body hovering just behind you. You’re so… aware of him. You don’t know if it’s because Marcus seems to naturally command every space he’s in or if there’s something electric that’s pulling you toward him, but either way, your entire body feels as though it’s on high alert.
A sharp buzzing makes you jump comically, making Emma snort.
“That’ll be the pizza,” Marcus announces. “Be right back.”
You glance over at Emma, who is still staring disinterestedly at the bookshelves. “It’s a nice place,” you say conversationally. 
“Mmmhm.”
“You okay?” you ask softly.
“Oh, yeah,” Emma scoffs, waving her hand. “Just been a while. It’s weird. You know.”
“He seems nice,” you say.
“He is,” she remarks. “I told you he was. I just… don’t know him very well. Like he said, I haven’t seen him in six years.”
“Maybe this will be good, then,” you suggest. “Get to know him now that you’re an adult and all that.”
Emma shrugs. “Maybe.”
You look back at the shelves. Emma was right; Marcus does have an alarmingly large number of editions of Art Through the Ages. You furrow your brow.
“What does your dad do in DC?”
“Oh, did I not tell you? He’s in the FBI.”
You feel as though you’ve swallowed your tongue, but before you can garble out a response–something like, “Mmmgnnbbllgffnhh?”–you hear Marcus coming back.
“Get it while it’s hot!” he says cheerfully. “You guys must be hungry after traveling all day.”
“Oh wow, Dad, that’s… a lot of pizza for three people,” Emma says, her eyebrows raising in surprise and confusion.
She’s right–there are five boxes sitting on the small kitchen island, along with several options of drink.
“I had no idea what either of you liked,” Marcus reasoned. “So I got a few different options. Cheese, pepperoni, supreme, hawaiian, and some kind of vegan thing, just in case.”
“You know, you could have just texted,” Emma remarks, at the same time that you whisper, “Thank you.”
Marcus looks sheepish. “Wanted to surprise you. Anyway, dig in–there’s obviously a lot.” He laughs quietly to himself, grabbing three plates and setting them down on the counter. You grab three different kinds–supreme, hawaiian, and the vegan option, out of curiosity–and sit on one of the barstools opposite Marcus. Emma grabs two cheeses and sits down next to you.
“So,” he says after a few minutes of surprisingly companionable silence. “I know Emma is pre-Law. Are you pre-Law too?” he asks, looking at you with a friendly, curious smile. 
“Mmmhmm,” you nod, tight-lipped. You hate this conversation–the college-age version of ‘What do you want to be when you grow up?’ Everyone asks the question with good intent, but it always leaves you in an anxiety spiral, an existential crisis, because no matter how many times you’re asked, you have absofuckinglutely no idea. 
“What kind of law do you want to go into?” This question is addressed more to Emma, who immediately launches into an explanation of Environmental Law and the impact of climate change on public health. Marcus nods eagerly, giving Emma his full attention as she talks, watching her with a small smile. 
“What about you?” he asks when she’s done, turning to you.
You gulp. 
“I don’t—I don’t really know. Not yet, anyways.” You brace yourself for the judgmental eyebrow raise, the well-meaning advice.
“That’s okay,” Marcus says, smiling. “No one says you have to have it figured out at… how old are you?”
“T-Twenty,” you mumble, feeling more naive and inexperienced than you ever have before.
“Nah,” Marcus says, shaking his head playfully. “No one has it figured out at twenty. And the people who think they do? They change.”
His eyes go far away for a split-second, and you wonder what he must have been like at twenty. Did he already have Emma at that point? Did he just find out that his girlfriend was pregnant? Was he panicking, trying to figure out how to make things work? You wonder what it was that he had wanted to do, and what he had sacrificed for Emma and her mom. You wonder if he had wanted the divorce, or if she had been the one to suggest it.
“Anyway,” Marcus says, casually waving a slice of pepperoni as he talks, “I mostly work with criminal lawyers. If that’s something you’re interested in, I could arrange a chat with someone this week.”
“Oh,” you say, too stunned to say anything else. “Yeah, maybe.”
Marcus shrugs good-naturedly. “Think about it,” he says, giving you another crooked grin. His eyes crinkle around the edges when he smiles, and it makes your stomach do somersaults. 
“Yeah,” you say again, a little breathlessly. Your next bite of pizza misses your mouth entirely, and you manage to stab yourself in the cheek with your slice, transferring a glob of tomato sauce onto your face in the process.
Emma laughs, and Marcus’s eyes glitter with amusement as you frantically reach for a napkin. 
“So you do, um… FBI stuff?” you ask him clumsily, trying to break the silence.
“Yep. FBI Stuff. Says it on my badge and everything.”
“Why do you have a bunch of art books?”
“I lead an international task force dealing with art crimes,” he answers patiently. 
“What constitutes an art crime?” Emma asks, her mouth full.
“Theft,” Marcus lists, “forgeries, black market sales, dealing in antiquities, looting of archaeological sites…”
“Oh, wow,” you breathe, a dopey smile on your face. Emma shoots you a funny look.
“So it’s like, nerdy FBI stuff,” she says.
“The nerdiest,” Marcus agrees, smiling.
“Do you still have a gun and stuff?”
“I do,” Marcus says carefully, frowning slightly. “It’s in the safe for the week, though, while you’re here.”
Your stomach flip-flops at the mental image of Emma’s dad holding a gun, those warm brown eyes dark with focus as he stares down… an art thief. Or something. 
“Enough about your old man,” he says with a self-deprecating chuckle. “What are you two looking to do tomorrow on your first day in DC?”
“Think we’ll hit the museums,” Emma says. “Get them out of the way first. We want to see the Library of Congress, obviously. Plus walking around to all the monuments and stuff. Oh, and the zoo!”
“Do you want my advice?” Marcus asks, and you both nod. “It’s supposed to be unseasonably warm tomorrow, and sunny. I’d do the monument tour or the zoo tomorrow if I were you. Save the indoor stuff for the end of the week, because it’s supposed to rain.”
“Monuments it is!” Emma exclaims. “Hey, can I… can I use your shower? I feel kinda gross from the travel day.”
“Absolutely.” Marcus hops up, leading Emma over to the guest bathroom. You listen as he points out a stack of towels intended for the two of you during your stay, the extra shampoo he’d bought, the spare toothbrushes just in case… Eventually he returns, hands stuffed in his pockets, looking hesitant again.
“Thank you,” you say again. “You went through a lot of trouble, and–”
“It’s no trouble,” Marcus says quickly. “No trouble at all. I–I have to admit I was surprised when Em–when she called, but I’m–I’m more than happy to host you two for the week. It’s no trouble at all,” he repeats.
“Okay,” you say dumbly. You’re staring again, unable to help the way your eyes are drawn to the way his arms fill out the shirt he's wearing when his hands are in his pockets like that. 
"You alright?" 
Your eyes flit up to his at the question. He's looking back at you, his head cocked to the side as he watches you. And suddenly, you can just tell–you can tell that he knows how flustered you are in front of him. 
You nod rapidly up and down in response, not trusting yourself to answer.  
"Good. Had enough pizza?"
"Mmhmm."
"Anything else to drink?" he asks. 
"Got any beer?" you ask with a quirk of your eyebrow.
"You told me you were twenty," Marcus reminds you. 
"Oh."
"And I work for law enforcement," he says gravely. 
Oh. 
"Oh, f-fuck, I um… I was kidding. Holy shit. I'm sorry. Seriously, I'm not a-a bad… student, or anything. I swear, I–"
As you continue to frantically backtrack, you realize that Marcus’s shoulders are shaking with laughter. 
"Oh, you're funny. Real funny. Ha. Ha."
"Next you'll be saying I should quit my day job," he says, his eyes sparkling. 
"I'm not sure what kind of art… crime… solver… you are, but I have to believe you're a better agent than you are a comedian," you deadpan. 
"You can come to my stand-up show on Tuesday and see for yourself."
Your jaw drops before you realize Marcus's lips are quivering with the effort of keeping a straight face. 
"You're on fire, tonight," you say, rolling your eyes. 
"You'll have to forgive me," he says, a gentle, more wistful smile gracing his lips. "I don't have company often, and it's been even longer since I've seen–" his eyes flick to the bathroom door, and he looks troubled for a moment. 
"Strictly off the record, if you do want a beer, I happen to have some," he says, changing the subject and smiling back at you again. 
"Nah, I'll save that favor for later in the week," you tell him.
"Noted," Marcus replies. He's looking at you again, still. He seems to be one of those people who gives all of his focus to someone when they speak, and the attention is starting to overwhelm you. 
"Hey!" Emma calls from the guest bedroom. "I wanna get started early tomorrow. Those monuments aren't gonna monument themselves."
You laugh and roll your eyes. "That's my cue," you say with a little smile. "Gonna grab a shower myself and call it a night."
"If you need anything, I'm a room away," Marcus says, but it only serves to remind you that this man will be sleeping in the next room.
"Got it," you say, nodding thickly. "Um, good night."
"Good night," he answers softly. 
When you reach the bathroom door, you turn around again–you can't help yourself. 
He's still looking at you. 
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"Get up!
"Get up!"
"GET–"
"Okay!" you whine, throwing an extra pillow in the general direction of Emma's voice. "Fuck. I'm up."
You throw on a pair of jeans and a faded tee, scrubbing your hands over your face as you stumble out of the guest room and into the kitchen, where Marcus hands you a cup of coffee, which you accept with a grunt.
"Emma warned me that you weren't a morning person," he says. 
"God, it's both of you, isn't it?" you grumble. "Morning people."
"I guess we turned out alike after all," Marcus says with a soft smile, watching as you take a grateful sip from the mug. "What's the first stop on the list?"
"I dunno, she's got it all planned out," you murmur. "Of like, seeing the farthest place first and working our way back."
"Sounds like a plan," Marcus says. "You two have fun."
"What are you doing today?" Emma interjects, coming into the kitchen, grabbing a bagel off of the counter, and stuffing it into her mouth. 
"Well, it's Sunday, so… grocery shopping," Marcus says. "Any special requests?"
"Filet mignon," Emma says. 
"You got it. Want some lobster tails as well?"
"Mmhmm."
"I was thinking more along the lines of spaghetti and meatballs. Anything else you ladies would like?"
Emma shuffles her feet, and you frown slightly. You've never known her not to immediately say what's on her mind–and clearly, something is. 
"What is it, Emmie?" Marcus asks softly.
"Do you remember that one time that we came to your family's for Christmas–I think I was maybe twelve?–and you made…"
"...Tamales?" Marcus asks, his eyebrows shooting upward. 
"Yeah," Emma answers, her voice smaller than you've ever heard it. "I still remember those. They were really good."
"Jesus, I haven't made those in…" he shakes his head. "I don't even know. But uh, sure. We can do that. Tamale night. It's a deal."
"Thanks," Emma says, smiling. "And… really? 'Emmie?' Dad, I'm not seven anymore."
"My mistake," Marcus says with a playful wink in your direction–which might make your heart stop. "You girls stay safe. Text if you need anything."
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Marcus was right–the weather is beautiful today. It’s perfect for walking endlessly from monument to monument, which you do all morning. You try to stay focused–thoughtfully reading the names on the Vietnam War Memorial and not thinking about Emma’s dad, in the plain white t-shirt he had been wearing this morning, in the produce section picking out apples. Even worse, you try not to imagine the sight of him cooking tonight.
He’s becoming a bit of an obsession for you, you can admit it. You want to know everything about him–what his job is like, what he does on the weekends, what he likes to read, what he did in the past to alienate the mother of his child enough that he’s barely seen his daughter–who he very clearly cares deeply for…
As you walk around the Washington Monument, you can’t stand it any longer. 
“Sooooo. It seems like things are going well between you and your dad,” you say conversationally.
“How do you mean?” 
“Less awkward, I guess.”
“It’s not that we don’t get along,” Emma says with a shrug. “We always used to. Like I said, I always thought he was nice. My mom…” 
“She didn’t like him?”
“She didn’t want to be around him. I don’t know why. They tried to protect me from the messy parts of divorce, but part of that means that I have no idea what their history is. She never talked about it. Neither did he.”
“Huh.” You stare in silence at the large white obelisk. “I wonder what happened.”
“I thought about asking my mom,” Emma says. “Lots of times, but I never got up the courage.”
“You should ask him,” you say quietly. “I get the feeling he needs to tell the story.”
Emma gives you a funny look. “That’s a weird thing to say.”
You shrug. “I’m weird.”
“Fair.”
The two of you walk until it feels as though your feet are going to fall off. 
“My feet are going to fall off,” you announce. “Surely there are no more monuments in the entirety of Washington, DC.”
“We’ve still got the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier.”
“Uggghhhh, how important can he be? He’s unknown.”
“This was your idea,” Emma points out. “Go to DC for spring break! Stay with my best friend’s estranged dad! Walk around and see all the monuments and shit!”
“Too many steps,” you groan. “They should all be concentrated in one square mile of land.”
“One more,” Emma promises. “And then spaghetti.”
“And laying on the couch watching TV,” you counter.
“And laying on the couch watching TV,” Emma agrees. “...And tomorrow we go to the zoo.”
“No!”
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Marcus chuckles as you stumble into his condo just after six. You immediately collapse onto the couch with an exaggerated groan.
“I’m staying right here for the rest of the week,” you announce.
“It’s been one day,” Marcus points out. 
“My phone’s step counter measures over thirty thousand steps,” you mumble. “I’m done.”
“That’s a lot,” Marcus concedes. “Hopefully that means the two of you are hungry this evening.”
“Fucking starving,” Emma agrees, crashing onto the couch herself and nearly colliding with you as she does so. 
“Well, since everyone is so tired,” Marcus says, the playfulness evident in his voice, “I’ll make spaghetti and meatballs tonight. Tamales are a group effort, so you two better be ready to work for your food.”
“I shall endeavor to do so,” Emma remarks with an exaggerated accent, causing you to laugh giddily. 
While Emma’s eyes are closed, you take advantage, watching Marcus–still with that same fitted white shirt–in the kitchen, boiling water, heating the sauce, and adding the meatballs. He must sense your gaze, because he turns, a characteristic crooked smile on his lips as he acknowledges you. 
“I know they’re frozen,” he admits, speaking of the meatballs, “but they always taste the same to me anyway.”
“I can’t wait,” you say, truthfully. “It’s been a long day.”
As if to demonstrate the fact, a loud snore emanates from the body next to you, making you grin.
“I’m glad you guys came,” Marcus says softly. “I don’t often have the opportunity to cook for… more than one.”
“No girlfriend?” you ask conversationally. 
Marcus laughs. “I’m… in between things, I suppose.”
“In between,” you parrot with a laugh. “How long have you been ‘in between?’”
He huffs. “Too long,” he murmurs. 
“How come?” you ask quietly.
Marcus frowns, thinking. “I dunno. No one recently has been… exactly what I’m looking for.”
“And what are you looking for?” you ask breathlessly.
“Spaghetti,” Emma mumbles from the couch.
“Spaghetti,” Marcus repeats, giving me a slightly melancholy smile. “Exactly. Come and get it, you two.”
Emma stirs, stumbling into the kitchen where two giant bowls of spaghetti and meatballs are awaiting the two of you.
“Holy shit,” she remarks. “Thanks for this.”
“Of course,” Marcus says. “I would never agree for you to stay and then not…” he trails off, unsure of himself.
You’re starting to realize that the bulk of Marcus’s most emotional statements go unsaid. I would ever agree for you to stay and then not take care of you, is what he hadn’t said. 
“Still doing the zoo tomorrow?” he asks, changing the subject, as always.
“Yup,” Emma answers.
He huffs, smiling wistfully. “Been ages since I’ve been to a zoo.”
“D’you wanna go?” you ask, before you can determine that it’s a bad idea.
Marcus looks at you, indecisive for a few seconds before he seemingly comes to his senses. “Nah,” he says, grinning. “You two have fun.”
“Are you sure?” Emma asks. “Apparently there’s a new panda baby.”
“That’s a hard bargain,” he admits.
“You should come with,” Emma decides. “It could be fun.”
“All right,” Marcus agrees hesitantly.
“It’s Monday,” you point out. “Don’t you have to work?”
“I’ll call off,” he answers quickly. “Not everyday one’s daughter is in town for an impromptu zoo trip.”
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“Look at the little lad,” Emma gushes. 
“The what?” Marcus asks. 
The three of you are staring at the panda enclosure, watching the newest addition to the zoo cause chaos.
“The chonky boi,” you agree.
“I have no idea what you two are saying,” Marcus admits. 
“The baby panda is cute,” Emma offers. 
“That I can agree on,” he decides.
The three of you, you’ve decided, make a good team. You try not to think about how your heart burns whenever Marcus looks at you, how your stomach does flips whenever he laughs. If you’re going to be a good friend to Emma–and you are–you’re going to have to put this silly crush aside and accept the fact that he’s a package deal with your best friend. 
That doesn’t stop the way the man looks at you, though. 
You think you’re imagining it, at first. After all, Marcus seems to be the type of person who focuses completely on whatever anyone has to say. The more you’re with him, though, it’s hard to deny that he seems to look at you just a tiny bit longer.
You start to notice it all day–when you’re looking at the exhibits, Marcus is looking at you. 
He’s watching your reaction to them–smiling when you smile, laughing when you laugh. You can’t parse out the meaning behind his actions–does it mean something? If so, what? What does it mean? 
You can’t admit the truth to yourself until you’re in the insect house. Emma is giddy with interest, and you… are trying. 
“Are you okay?” Marcus asks softly in your ear–and you try not to shiver.
“Great,” you squeak. “Just don’t love the bird-eating spider.”
“I don’t like them either,” he confesses with a smile. “Do you need to leave?”
“Idunno,” you mumble, slurring the words together. 
“Emmie,” Marcus announces, “we’re going to take a little break, okay?”
“Mmm.” 
You and Marcus escape into the bright sunshine, and you let out an awkward laugh. “I can’t believe they have some of them loose in there–without glass or anything!”
“I’m not going back in that building,” Marcus agrees, laughing with you. “The giant orb weaver was the last straw.”
“That was awful,” you say, nodding.
“Come to think of it, I might be more of a baby panda guy, myself.”
“I’ll take the snakes over this,” you agree.
You sit down on a nearby bench, still giggling together as you wait for Emma.
“Is it weird if I say I’m glad you came?” you ask quietly.
“I’m glad I came, too,” Marcus says beside you.
“I think–” you begin, but Emma emerges from the insect house, grinning ear to ear.
“You think… what?” Marcus asks, but you shake your head and shrug.
“I dunno,” you mumble. “I just… think.”
“Hey, wimps,” Emma shouts. “They let me touch the tarantula.”
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Marcus takes the two of you out to dinner at a casual burger spot near his place. While the tension between him and Emma has lessened significantly since the first day, it feels as though it’s been replaced by a thick cloud of tension between the two of you. 
There’s something about the man that speaks to you, something within him that seems to vibrate on the same frequency as something within you. Twin souls, you’d say, if you were in a mind to be romantic, except… it can’t be. He must be nearly forty–and almost twice your age. There’s nothing you have that he would want–nothing you could offer a man who has his entire life together while yours has barely started.
Still, the way Marcus laughs at your jokes and gives you knowing glances–as if the two of you are sharing some type of inside joke that you’ve had for years–keeps you flustered and breathless throughout most of the evening.
The glass of wine he offers when you arrive home doesn’t help, either. You watch the red liquid swirl in your glass and wonder how it would taste from his lips, instead. And, when you’ve reached the bottom of your glass, the fuzzy-headed feeling you get from the alcohol combined with the way your stomach swoops in its place every time Marcus’s eyes meet yours has you feeling dizzy and enraptured in equal parts. 
When he locks eyes with you over the rim of his own glass as he drains the last sip, you freeze, afraid that you’d been caught out–that he can read every dumbstruck expression on your face and knows exactly what he does to you.
But all he does is shoot you a little smile, announce that he’s going to bed– “Back to work for me, tomorrow”–and leaves you in the living room alone with Emma, trying not to look as though you’re checking out her dad’s butt as he leaves the room. 
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The next day, you and Emma spend most of the day at the Library of Congress while Marcus is at work. As a result, neither of you are too tired to help when Marcus suggests making the tamales tonight. 
“I’m going to preface this by saying I’m not very good at making these,” he says with a laugh as he struggles with the dough. “My grandma only made these on special occasions, and I’ve done it myself approximately two times without her.”
“Well, the good news is that I’ve got no frame of reference,” you tell him. “So as long as they’re edible, they’ll be the best tamales I’ve ever had.”
Marcus chuckles and ducks his head; you can see the pink tinge on the tips of his ears as he continues to stir the mixture.
“Emmie, do you want to do the dough or the filling?” he asks. 
“Filling.”
“That leaves you with the fun part,” Marcus says to you with a playful wink. “You get to spread the dough out on the corn husks like this–” he frowns as a glob of dough gets stuck to the spatula. “I told you I’m not very good at this. But you get the idea.”
You really don’t; cooking has never been your strong suit. You do your best to spread the dough out, but after just a couple of repetitions, your fingers, your shirt, and the counter around you are sticky with dough. 
“This is not going very well,” you mumble. 
Marcus looks up from the tamale he’s currently folding and laughs joyfully. “That’s part of the process.”
“I really don’t feel like it is,” you shoot back. “It’s sticking to everything but the corn husks.”
“Here,” Marcus chuckles. And suddenly, he’s right behind you, his chest nearly touching your back as he reaches around you to gently guide your hands himself. “Like this.”
You can’t possibly focus on your task, not when you have to remind your body to keep breathing while Marcus’s hands are on you. Your eyes stare unseeingly down at the corn husk until he releases you. 
“Better?” he asks.
“Mmhm,” you hum, abnormally high-pitched.
“You’ve got some on your cheek,” he remarks with a soft smile. His thumb gently swipes across it, catching the stray dough and wiping it on a towel. 
In the end, the tamales are hideous, but they taste incredible. They might be the best meal you’ve ever had–or maybe it’s just the way Marcus had smiled proudly at you when your technique improved after his intervention.
After dinner, the three of you sit on the small couch and watch a movie.
“It’s in black and white,” Emma remarks, wrinkling her nose.
“Double Indemnity? It’s a classic!” Marcus protests.
“Old movies are always so boring,” Emma says. 
“It’s not boring,” he pouts. “The unhappy wife of a wealthy oil baron starts a dangerous, illicit love affair with an insurance salesman, and they hatch a plot to murder her husband and collect the insurance money.”
“That’s wild,” you laugh. “How have you seen this before?”
“I’ve always been told I’m an old soul.”
“Are you sure you’re not just old?” Emma teases.
“Hush. Watch the movie.”
The film is engaging, but all of the walking around of the past few days starts to catch up with you about halfway through. Before you know it, your eyes are drooping, and your head tips back on the couch cushion as you start to doze off. When you wake, the credits are rolling, and you’re no longer upright on the back of the couch.
You’re drooling on Marcus’s shoulder.
You startle, sitting back up with a frantic gasp and wiping your mouth in horror.
“Shh,” Marcus whispers, placing a calming hand on your forearm. “Emma fell asleep, too.”
“Fuck. I’m sorry,” you babble, taking in the little wet spot on his shirt.
“Hey, it’s okay,” he assures softly. “You’re tired. You needed the sleep.”
“Still,” you say. “I didn’t mean to…” you trail off awkwardly. 
“It’s okay,” Marcus repeats, even quieter still. His hand still rests on your forearm, his thumb subtly moving back and forth across your skin. 
Neither of you speak for what seems like an eternity, until finally, he breaks the spell.
“Should go to bed,” he murmurs. “I’ll wake up Emma. Go get some rest.”
“Marcus,” you whisper shakily.
“Go,” he whispers back. 
He squeezes your arm once, then releases you, and you reluctantly get up from the couch and cross to the guest bedroom door. You turn again, watching as Marcus gently smooths Emma’s hair back from her forehead as he rouses her from the couch. There’s so much tenderness in his eyes, and you wonder how much different he might be if Emma had been a more constant presence in his life. He seems so lonely–does he have friends outside of work, you wonder? Does he ever date? 
Emma sits up blearily and pads across the living room, walking past you and collapsing on the bed. You take one last look at Marcus, and follow her. 
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The next morning, you feel as though you could cut the tension between you and Marcus with a knife. There’s something there–and you both know it. He seems to be doing his best to ignore it, avoiding eye contact with you, and busying himself with pouring a thermos of coffee and messing with his tie absentmindedly as he gets ready to leave for work. 
“Where are you off to today?” he comments lightly.
“Smithsonian,” Emma answers. 
“Sounds fun. I’ve got a deposition this afternoon that’s probably going to run late, so go ahead and grab something for dinner while you’re out. I’m not sure when I’ll be home.”
The only time Marcus’s eyes fall on you is in the moment just before he steps through the front door. He pauses, hand on the doorknob, and glances back in your direction, dark eyes watching you for a moment before he nods subtly and leaves.
It’s funny how just a simple, seconds-long moment of eye contact with this man can turn your insides to jelly. Your breath stutters as the door clicks shut, and you try to gather yourself again.
“What’s first?” Emma asks. “Natural History or Air and Space?”
You put Marcus out of your mind for most of the day, although he’s never far away; you’re able to call up the feel of his hand on your forearm at any given moment. You can imagine the burn of his eyes even as you walk through exhibit after exhibit.
True to his word, he’s not home for dinner. You and Emma grab sandwiches from a shop around the corner and eat them in the living room in front of the TV. It’s nearly seven when Marcus finally gets home, opening the door and greeting the two of you with a tired smile and a heavy sigh.
“How did it go?” Emma asks.
“Shit,” he answers, shooting her a crooked grin. “But I’ve got leftover tamales to look forward to, so the day is looking up.”
You watch another movie–Emma’s choice this time, and something a bit more current. You don’t fall asleep this time; you can’t, not with the way your body feels on high alert tonight. Marcus is sitting beside you again, as he was the night before, and all you can think about is how much you want to sink into his arms again–and this time, intentionally. You want to lay on his chest and have him wrap his arms around you; you want him to slowly turn and press you down on the cushions, to feel the weight of him on top of you, the light scrape of his beard on your neck, his breath in your ear.
A wave of arousal washes over you, heating your skin and sending a little trickle of damp into your underwear. You wonder if Marcus can feel it–feel the elevated warmth of your skin from where he’s sitting. You wonder if he can tell how much he affects you. 
When the movie ends, you can barely meet his eyes as you bid him goodnight, following Emma to your room. You can’t turn around to see if he’s watching you; you can’t stand another glance at that deep, burning gaze of his. 
Sleep evades you. You’re too hot, so you kick off the covers. Then you’re too cold, so you cover up again. You flip over the pillow, turn from your back to your stomach, and back again. The fantasy plays once more in your head: Marcus’s hand cradling the back of your neck as he kisses a path down your neck and to your chest. You want to feel the weight of him between your thighs, feel him pressing against your core. You’re dripping for him, and he doesn’t even know it. 
No one has ever done this to you, but he has. And he hasn’t even touched you. 
You wonder if he’d be bothered by the fact that you aren’t exactly sure what you’re doing in that department. You wonder if he’d be put off by your inexperience, or if he’d be happy to guide you in the act of pleasure. 
You’ve had a couple of fumbling encounters, rushed, frenzied moments as a teenager with boys who haphazardly stuffed a finger or two into you, but it didn’t feel like anything to you. Not really. No one has ever made you cum–just you, in the safety of your own bed at night, your fingers seeking relief that no one else has been able to provide.
Could he give it to you?
Your past experiences have been with boys; and Marcus is a man. 
Your legs shift, rubbing your thighs against each other as you try to find a more comfortable position.
You can’t find one.
Eventually, you give up–getting out of bed with a sigh. Maybe if you grab a drink of water and sit on the couch for a while, sleep will win out in the end. You pad into the kitchen, filling a cup in the sink and taking a few long sips. The cool water is a relief, so you run your hand underneath the water next and scrub it over your face. Finally sated, you set the cup down by the sink and turn.
To see Marcus sitting on the couch, dimly lit by the glow of his laptop screen.
You nearly double over with shock, the unexpected sight causing a spike of adrenaline to course through your body.
“Sorry,” he says apologetically. “Couldn’t sleep, so I was… catching up on work.”
The mirror image of a popular news site reflects through the glass picture frame behind the couch, exposing the tiny lie.
“Yeah, me neither,” you admit quietly. “Thought I’d sit out here for a while and see if that helps, but… sorry, I’ll leave you to it.” You make to turn back, to retreat to the room again, but Marcus speaks softly behind you.
“Come sit,” he says. “I don’t mind.”
Breath caught somewhere in your throat, you hesitantly sink down on the couch beside him. Marcus closes his laptop and sets it down on the coffee table, and the silence stretches out between you. 
“So, are you liking DC so far?” he asks.
“Yeah,” you answer eagerly. “I’m having a great time. I’ll… I’ll be sad to leave,” you admit. “Is that weird?”
“It’s weird if you’re talking about missing the Washington Monument,” Marcus teases. “Or the traffic.”
“I’m talking about the metro, obviously,” you joke. “The rest of the country could stand for some public transit options.”
“I’m not sure they should be taking their cues from DC,” he chuckles. 
“Pssh, I like it.”
“The novelty wears off, believe me.”
You lapse into silence again. You’re sitting close enough to Marcus that you can feel the warmth from his skin, even though you aren’t touching. You want to sink into him, to have him envelop you, consume you.
You feel yourself unconsciously shifting closer to him. 
Is it just your imagination, or did Marcus subtly lean closer to you?
The pull is inevitable; your eyes flick up to his, and you can almost feel the point of no return pass the two of you by. 
You lick your lips, and his breath catches in his throat.
“I wasn’t talking about the metro,” you say breathlessly. 
“I know.”
And suddenly, his lips are on yours. 
It’s not fast, not rushed or frantic; he doesn’t surge forward to take you. It’s simply that the two of you are close enough that at one moment, Marcus Pike is not kissing you, and then the next moment, he is. 
As with everything this man does, the kiss is soft and tender. His hand comes up to cup your cheek, and he gently tits his head as his lips move against yours. His mouth opens ever so slightly, and you feel a wave of pure want rush through you at the light flick of his tongue against your lower lip.
You make a ragged sound in your chest as your lips part for him, and your tongues slide against each other for far too short of a time before Marcus pulls back, suddenly, his eyes full of worry.
“Oh, shit,” he murmurs. “Shit, we… we shouldn’t.”
This time, you kiss him back. The neck of his soft t-shirt crumples in your fist as you pull him closer, opening your mouth to him, and his protests die at the feel of your lips on his. Instead, it seems to light a fire within him; one hand curls around the back of your neck and the other grips your hip and you gasp softly into his mouth at the feel of his hands on your body. 
Marcus breaks the kiss again, but instead of pulling back to give you more reasons why you can’t, this time he kisses a path across your cheek and down your neck. You’ve imagined the way his light beard would feel against your skin so many times over the last couple of days, but nothing compares to the reality of having him gently scrape his teeth against your neck as you arch your back to him. 
“Fuck,” Marcus whispers. “So sweet, honey.”
You whimper at the term of endearment as Marcus gently starts to shift positions, turning and guiding you down onto the couch, just as you’d imagined. 
Now that you’re horizontal, the kisses that started out tender and sweet start to grow more and more lascivious. You can feel the weight of him between your legs and his hot length pressing against you, his hips rocking slightly as he lazily explores you with his hands and his mouth. 
One hand creeps up your inner thigh and slips under your thin sleep shorts and underwear, gently grazing your folds and feeling the obscene amount of slick that’s already gathered there. 
“Shit,” Marcus hisses softly, reverently. “You’re so wet. How are you so wet?”
“You,” you answer earnestly, staring up at him with wide eyes. 
He laughs breathlessly in response, his eyes raking up and down your body, taking in your nipples peeking through the threadbare material of your tank top. His finger explores deeper, slipping inside your tight channel and immediately finding… something… that makes you gasp raggedly. 
“So responsive,” he murmurs playfully. “I’ve barely touched you.” He starts to slowly pump his finger in and out, his thumb pressing on your clit as he rubs against that little spot inside of you every time, and all you can do is squeeze your eyes shut and cling to him as this one little movement threatens to take you apart. 
“Honey,” he whispers disbelievingly as he feels you start to tighten around him. “Already?”
“I–” 
Whatever you had been about to say dies on your lips as you suddenly fall over the edge, shaking as the pleasure overtakes you. Marcus soothes you through it, whispering in your ear as you come down from your high.
“Wow,” you murmur. “Holy shit, that was amazing.”
Marcus pulls back and gives you a funny look. “What’s going on?” he asks, frowning slightly.
“Heh–you’re going to laugh,” you say, giving him an awkward grimace. 
He raises his eyebrow, waiting for you to continue. 
“I’ve–kind of never done this before,” you admit, pressing your lips together sheepishly. 
“Oh shit,” Marcus breathes, sitting up fully as his eyes frantically sweep over you. “Oh, honey–no. I can’t–we can’t do this.”
“Why?” you ask, wincing internally at how whiny it comes out.
“It can’t–it shouldn’t be me,” he says softly. “That’s more than I deserve to take.”
“You’re not taking anything,” you protest. “I–I want it to be you.”
Marcus shakes his head again, but you can see the cracks in his resolve, the way his eyes are searching you, devouring you with his gaze.
“I don’t want it to be some boy at a frat party back home,” you tell him. “I want you. I want it to feel good. Please?”
Marcus’s expression is inscrutable as his eyes rake over your form, disheveled and sated, underneath him. Your heart sinks when he stands up, shame sinking down into the pit of your stomach, but then he extends his hand to you, and you look up at him, questioning. 
“I’m not going to let your first time be a quick fuck on my couch,” he says quietly and resolute. “If we’re going to do this, we’re going to bed.”
Wordlessly, you accept his hand and allow him to pull you to your feet. You wobble slightly, still shaky from the orgasm, and Marcus draws you into his side, steadying you. He guides you forward, keeping you close as the two of you walk to his bedroom. 
Despite the fact that you were more than ready to let this man take you right there on the couch, the change in venue has your heart hammering in your chest. Now, it feels real. It feels intentional. 
“C’mere, beautiful,” Marcus murmurs when he feels your steps falter. His hand slides up your arm and across your shoulder until it curls gently around your neck, causing goosebumps to rise to the surface of your skin. He presses a couple of soft, chaste kisses across your opposite shoulder, and your lips part of their own accord. 
“I need you to tell me if you don’t want to do this,” he says softly in your ear.
“I want–”
“I know, I know,” Marcus interrupts. “I want you to tell me if that changes.”
He gently guides you onto his bed, one hand on the small of your back to keep you from going too fast. 
“I wanna know what you like,” he murmurs as he hovers over you again, his hand coming up underneath the thin material of your top. “I wanna know what you don’t like.” 
“I–I don’t really know–”
“I know,” Marcus grins wolfishly, his eyes sparkling with amusement. “That’s the idea.”
He starts to push the material of your shirt up, up, up, until your nipples are pebbling in the cool air of his bedroom. He gently pulls it over your head and casts it aside, looking down at you with undisguised hunger. He trails the backs of his fingers down the side of one breast and underneath. “I get to find out what you like,” he says. He circles one areola with the tip of his finger, making you shiver. “And I get to be the first to do it.”
He gently drags the pad of his finger across the little bud of your nipple, and you gasp for him as if you’d hit a live wire. 
“I’m gonna take a guess and say you liked that,” he teases. 
“Marcus,” you whine. 
“Shh,” he whispers again, just before his mouth engulfs your nipple. Your hand darts out unconsciously, tangling in the hair on the back of Marcus’s neck as you squirm under his hot tongue. You can’t tell whether you want to pull away or push toward him, but in reality all you do is whine and take what he gives you. He switches to the other one; lathing and flicking his tongue and pressing down until you whimper.
“So… fucking… responsive,” Marcus murmurs in between kisses as he starts to mouth his way down your belly to the band of your sleep shorts. His fingers dip underneath, poised to pull them down over your hips, but he waits–eyes flicking up to yours to gauge your reaction. 
“Can I taste you?” he asks quietly.
“I-If you want,” you laugh shakily. 
“If I want?” he parrots disbelievingly. “You’re saying that like it’s not a given–like I haven’t been thinking of burying my tongue in that sweet little pussy all night. If I want,” he chuckles to himself again, slowly dragging your shorts and underwear down your legs. “I need to taste you. I need to feel you fall apart on my tongue. The first one was kind of a surprise, and all I want is to feel you shaking again.”
You’re bare before him, but you don’t have any time to be self-conscious, because Marcus is laying back down on the bed, his face inches away from your pussy. He gently guides your legs over his shoulders before lowering his mouth to you. 
You aren’t sure who groans louder at the first touch of his tongue through your folds. 
Marcus makes a pained noise in his throat before murmuring, “So sweet, honey–fuck, you’re so sweet.”
His tongue is delicate, but precise; he flicks it back and forth against your clit, then dips down to lap at your entrance until you’re trembling for him. He’s tireless and patient, cataloging every whimper and moan he pulls from you as the pleasure slowly builds inside of you. In no time at all, you’re dangling on the precipice, your hips locking into place as you start to reach the point of no return. 
“I–I–” you stammer, trying to warn him.
Marcus hums enthusiastically in agreement, concentrating his efforts on your clit until you fall apart with a gasp.
He groans again, licking you through each little aftershock of pleasure until you’re boneless. 
“You squeeze me so hard,” he croons. “Can you feel that? You’re so tight around my tongue.”
“Shit…” you murmur. You’re too fucked-out to say anything else. 
“Gonna have to open you up a bit with my fingers,” he says softly. “So I don’t hurt you.”
You look up at him with half-lidded eyes. He’s still clothed–wearing sweatpants and a shirt, while you’re completely naked, and you frown slightly at the disparity.
“Everything okay?” Marcus asks, seeing your expression. 
“Can–Can I see you? You’re so… clothed,” you say with a little pout. 
He laughs, smiling widely so that the corners of his eyes crinkle, and your heart soars. 
“Of course,” he agrees, stripping off his shirt. “Of course.”
You raise up on one elbow, gazing up at Marcus’s broad chest, the light smattering of hair, and the soft swell of his belly. You can’t help but reach up and touch him, pressing your palm to his sternum and trailing down, tracing the little path of hair until it disappears under the band of his sweatpants. Your fingers curl underneath the band, looking up at him with wide eyes. 
“These, too?” he asks with a teasing chuckle, smiling wider when you nod eagerly. 
His cock bobs free as he pushes his pants down his hips, and your eyes widen at the sight of him, thick and hard and heavy with want. Curiously, you wrap your hand around him, and you’re rewarded with a little ‘hnnngg’ of pleasure and surprise as you touch him. 
You gently trace the little ridges on his shaft, traveling up to the flushed, purple head, where the skin is even softer, and back down again.
“F-Fuck,” Marcus muttters. “Can’t do that too much, honey, or I’m gonna lose it before we even get started.”
“I like it,” you say with a little giggle. “I never realized they were so… soft.”
Marcus makes a broken, choked sound. “Jesus. You’re gonna be the death of me.” 
He falls onto one elbow, giving you a messy, passionate kiss before sucking his fingers into his mouth and gently sinking one finger into you again. His lips stay close to yours, noses almost touching, his eyes watching your face intently as he slowly opens you up. His fingers are so thick, and just like before, he seems to know exactly where to press up inside you to make the pleasure spark inside of you. He adds a second finger, and you whimper–you're already so full. 
"Little bit more," Marcus murmurs. "Doing so well for me–fuck–so tight."
He gently starts to slide a third into you, the heel of his hand pressing against your clit to offer some relief.
“Is it greedy if I say I want you to cum for me again?” he asks softly. “I want to feel it again. Can you do that for me?”
You nod dazedly–wanting to do anything, everything this man asks as long as he keeps making you feel like this. 
His fingers press up against your walls again, and you sob loudly into the room.
Marcus immediately muffles the sound with a kiss, swallowing your whimpers and cries in an attempt to keep the sound from carrying across the apartment. 
“Gotta stay quiet for me,” he whispers against your lips. 
“S-Sorry.”
“No, shh, don’t be sorry,” he murmurs. “I wish you could be loud. Wish I could make you scream for me. Just–fuck, honey, you’re right there, aren’t you? I can feel you squeezing me–fuck, you get so wet. Give me one more. One more, and I’ll give you my cock. That’s it, that’s–yes–” 
Marcus breaks off on a groan as you clamp down on his fingers. It’s so much, you’re so full, and you buck against his hand, your lower back rising up off of the bed as he pulls it from you. 
You slump back down, breathing heavily, as he carefully withdraws his fingers. 
“Hey,” he says quietly, trying to get your attention. “Hey, I should have asked this sooner, but–are you on birth control? Do you want me to use a condom?”
“I-I’m on the pill,” you tell him. “If you… you know, if you didn’t want to. That would be–I’d like that.”
“That’s perfect,” he whispers, giving you a tender kiss. “I’d like that, too.” He pauses, and mutters a soft curse under his breath. “I wish I had some lube,” he remarks. “Just to be sure I don’t hurt you.”
You watch as he spits on his cock and takes himself in hand. 
“This will have to do, though,” he says as he slicks it over his cock and crawls over you. “And I’ll just go slow.”
He cups the back of your neck with one hand as he lines himself up with the other. His lips are inches from yours, but he doesn’t lean down to kiss you–no, he seems to want to watch your reaction as the tip of his cock notches at your entrance. 
“Don’t want to hurt you,” he whispers again.
“You could never hurt me,” you say confidently, and you watch as his lips part in surprise. “Marcus–” you add, as you shift your hips impatiently. “–just do it.”
Your eyes widen as you feel him push into you, his girth splitting you open. It can’t be much bigger than three of his thick fingers, but still, it just feels like more. It’s longer, certainly; he keeps pushing in, and even when you’re sure he’s reached the end, there’s still more. 
“Oh wow,” you hear yourself murmuring again and again. “Oh, Marcus.” 
“I know,” he returns, kissing your cheekbone, your forehead, your nose, and then finally, your lips. “I know, honey.”
He starts to rock his hips, slowly undulating them, letting his cock drag back and forth against your walls. It feels incredible–you never imagined how fucking good this would feel–and you know beyond a shadow of a doubt that it’s because it’s him. It’s Marcus–a man you’ve admittedly only known for a few days, but you feel as though you know him already–and you trust him completely. 
“Does it hurt at all?” he rumbles softly in your ear.
“No,” you answer emphatically. “It feels–holy shit.”
Marcus laughs breathlessly. “Yeah?”
“Yeah. Can–can we do this again?”
He chuckles. “We’re currently doing this.”
“I already want it again.”
He starts to go a little harder, his thrusts a little deeper. His hand grips your hip for leverage, the other still cradling the back of your neck. He kisses you, a deep, messy, passionate thing, before burying his face in the crook of your neck and sucking a gentle mark into your skin.
“Feels so good,” he murmurs. “I’m not gonna last, not when you feel like this.”
“Like how?” you ask, smiling widely. 
“So fucking tight,” Marcus groans. “And wet, and hot, and–” he brings his thumb to your clit and starts to rub little circles around it. “I need you to cum again,” he says. “Fuck, you–you feel too good, honey, I’m not gonna last.”
“I—I don’t know if I can,” you murmur. 
“Please,” he says, a hint of desperation in his tone. “Please, baby, you’ve gotta do this one last thing for me. Let me feel it, let me make you feel good. Let me–let me–”
Your mouth falls open as you feel it wash over you. This is better than anything you’ve ever felt before, any relief you’ve been able to seek with your fingers–the drag of his cock along your walls only serves to prolong your pleasure, making each little aftershock feel like a new wave of pleasure. 
“Oh, fuck,” Marcus groans. “Fuck.” He buries his face in the crook of your neck as he shoves his hips into you one more time, emptying himself within you with a deep groan. 
The aftermath is quiet. After gently, tenderly cleaning you up with a damp cloth, Marcus collapses on the pillows and pulls you to him, wrapping his arms around you as you settle with your head resting on his shoulder.
“Was this a bad idea?” you ask quietly as you trace little shapes on his chest.
Marcus huffs a laugh. “Probably,” he answers.
“I don’t care,” you say resolutely, causing his hold on you to tighten. “...Do you regret it?” you ask, feeling unsure of yourself again.
“No,” Marcus says immediately. “No. I was drawn to you from the beginning. I’m sorry, I–I should have tried harder to prevent this, but…”
“I felt it, too,” you murmur. “Maybe we weren’t meant to prevent it.”
The two of you bask in the afterglow, reveling in the feel of your bodies pressed together. You can’t help but think of how tender, how loving he is–not just with you, but with Emma.
“Can I ask a personal question?” you ask, breaking the silence.
Marcus shrugs. “Sure.”
“This is probably weird to be thinking about right now, but… why does Emma’s mom not want you around?”
 Marcus sighs, his lips pressing into your forehead–not really a kiss, just a caress of your hairline with his mouth.
“That story doesn’t exactly paint me in the best light.”
“I want to know. I just… don’t understand.”
“What don’t you understand?” he asks.
“You’re… you’re such a good dad–a good man. I don’t understand how her mom wanted nothing to do with you. I just don’t get it.”
Marcus nods, pressing his lips together. “I wasn’t always a good man,” he says quietly. “I tried to do the best I could for the both of them–for Emma and her mom–but I’m afraid I fell very short, in the beginning.”
“What happened?”
“We were in college when we found out she was pregnant,” Marcus says with a sigh. “She was nineteen, I was almost twenty-one. We hadn’t been together long; maybe a couple of months. She was terrified, of course–and so was I, but never told her that. I asked her to marry me because I thought it was the right thing to do.”
“Did you love her?”
“I cared for her, very much so. And even if we weren’t quite right for each other, knowing–” Marcus swallows thickly, “–knowing our child, my child, was growing inside of her made me feel deeply connected. If you had asked me at twenty-one, I would have sworn up and down that I was in love.”
“But not now?”
Marcus huffs softly. “I know a little better, now.”
“What happened?” you ask, tracing the line of his collarbone with the tip of your finger. “What did you do?”
“Well, the first thing I did was drop out of art school,” he says with a little laugh. “Didn’t think it would pay the bills, especially not with a wife and a baby.”
“You were an artist?” you ask, surprised.
“Wanted to be,” he chuckled. “At least at that time. So instead, I applied for the FBI. Joined the Art Crimes division. And shortly after I completed training… Emma was born.” His eyes are far away, a small smile on his face as he remembers. “And she was perfect. And I remember thinking, all the struggling, all the hardship, all the times Denise and I didn’t get along… it would be worth it, in the end. No matter what happened; because I had her.”
You swallow past the lump in your throat. “What went wrong?”
“Nothing in particular, at first. We struggled to make ends meet. We were two young parents with no idea what we were doing, and even though I might have known deep down that we weren’t right for each other, I just wanted it to go right. I wanted us to be happy, but in the end we were just too different. We didn’t work–and while I might have been blind to it at the time, Denise wasn’t. When Emma was barely even two, she filed for divorce, and I–” he sighs heavily again. “I went a little off the rails.”
You tilt your head and look up at Marcus. His eyes are stormy, and you can see the remorse etched into the lines of his face. You don’t ask how, you just wait patiently for him to continue.
“I didn’t want to be divorced at twenty-three. This wasn’t–it wasn’t the life I had expected for myself, not what I would have chosen, but because I had Emma, I didn’t want anything else. I always knew I would want a family, and so what if it happened… a little out of order?”
“What did you do?” you whispered.
“I tried to convince her to change her mind. She took Emma and went to live with her parents, and I’d call them every day, asking to talk to her. I wanted to persuade her–I thought that if she could just see that we had plenty of time, we could raise Emma and be good parents and still… still have time for whatever we wanted. That we could still build lives.
“When she never returned my calls, I started stopping by,” he confesses, his voice even quieter. “They’d always tell me she was out, so I started showing up at odd hours, trying to… trying to just catch her one time–I thought if I explained that she could do whatever she wanted, as long as we could just stay together and raise Emma, she’d agree. But the more I tried to contact her, the more she pulled away, and rightly so, honestly. I was badgering her. I tried to justify it at the time, said I was doing it all for Emma, but I, uh… It took me until much later to admit I was actually doing it for me. I was so scared of being a failure, and scared to be alone.
“Anyway, the court didn’t look very kindly on what looked to everyone involved like stalking behavior, and Denise was afforded full custody.”
“M-Marcus,” you murmur, unable to help the water gathering at the corners of your eyes. 
“Broke my heart,” he whispers, his voice full of emotion. “And I was angry about it for a while, but when it comes down to it, I was just angry with myself. It was my actions that lost me my daughter, and… well, I’ve had twenty years to come to terms with that, now.”
“How did you finally… come to face all of that?” you ask quietly.
“Therapy,” Marcus says with a genuine laugh. “And that is another story for another time.”
“God, what else happened to you?”
“Nothing,” he chuckles, “just another relationship that I fought way too hard for.” He playfully runs his finger down the bridge of your nose before tilting your chin upward for a soft kiss. “And you,” he murmurs, “need to go back to bed.”
Your emotions still running on high alert after Marcus’s emotional confession of his past, you surge forward and throw your arms around his neck. 
“I’m sorry,” you whisper. 
“I’m okay,” he promises. “It was a long time ago.”
“You should tell Emma,” you say softly. “She never knew why her mom didn’t want you around.”
“Not really something you want to tell your daughter,” he says with a sad smile. “That you basically stalked her mom.”
“She’s grown up. She’s older than her mom was when–”
“Believe me, I know,” Marcus groans. “Don’t remind me; it makes this feel very… wrong.” He gestured between the two of you.
“Just trust me,” you murmur. “She’d want to know.” With herculean effort, you extricate yourself from his arms, grab your clothes, and redress. Feeling unsure in the way the conversation ended, you tell yourself not to turn around again when your hand lands on the doorknob.
“Honey,” Marcus calls out softly from the bed. “Good night.”
“Good night,” you whisper back, and then you’re gone.
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“Where are you two off to, today?” Marcus asks conversationally over coffee. He’s made it stronger than usual today, and it makes warmth pool deep in your stomach at the reminder of your very sleepless night last night. You’re grateful for the extra boost of caffeine as well, of course–the morning seemed to come far too early after being up half of the night. Sleep had still been hard to come by when you finally returned to the guest room, after all; the conversation about Marcus’s past was still swirling around in your head, and every time you closed your eyes, you could still feel his hands on you. 
You never knew it could feel like this, never knew how good it could be with someone who really knew what they were doing. Someone so giving, so gentle and yet so ruthless in pursuing your pleasure. Someone brimming with passion, capable of both the softest prase and the most depraved filth in the same sentence.
If you had thought your thirst would be sated after finally getting what you’d fantasized about and more, you were a fool. The flame burns hotter than ever this morning, and the sight of Marcus in a suit with not a hair out of place only makes you think about how he had looked between your legs last night–that devilish smirk as he teased about wanting to taste you.
You wonder if you’ll ever see him that way again, or if last night was a fluke. 
Had he noticed when your fingers had trembled around the coffee cup he handed you? 
He had given you a soft, tender stare when you had first entered the kitchen, but that’s the only evidence you can find so far that Marcus is even half as affected as you feel. You can still feel him this morning, a subtle ache between your legs when you sit down, and you wish you could see some outward sign on him that this actually happened.
“Not really sure,” Emma answers Marcus’s question. “Kind of ran out of stuff to see.”
“Impossible,” Marcus chuckles. “Well, you can hang out here if you want, or if you're really looking for a distraction, you can come to the office with me.”
“The fucking FBI office?” Emma asks. “Are we allowed?”
“Yeah, why wouldn’t you be?” Marcus shrugs. “Plus, I might be able to set up some time for you to talk to someone in Legal,” he says to you. “Are you still interested in that?”
“Oh wow,” you breathe. “Really?”
“‘Course,” he replies. “I said I would.”
You nod, smiling up at him beatifically. “I’d like that a lot.”
“Perfect,” he grins. “Well, if you’re coming, we’re going to need to leave soon. Are you almost ready?”
“I’m ready,” Emma announces, shouldering her bag.
“Yeah, me too.”
Marcus winks at you, and you try not to let yourself react to it.
“Let’s go, then.”
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You had assumed that you’d spend most of your day at the FBI holed up in Marcus’s office, doing nothing. You had imagined that, out of necessity, you’d be barred from attending any meetings or hearing about his department’s day-to-day activities, but when you arrive, his team seems enthusiastic to have you and Emma there. Much to your surprise, they even let the two of you sit in the back of the room while Marcus conducts a briefing. 
You listen, enthralled, as he discusses a recent forgery case that the team is working on. His demeanor, as it is at home, is good-natured and easygoing. He’s easy to smile, and engaging when he talks, and as a result, he utterly commands the room. His style of quiet, unassuming authority has you subtly squirming in your chair. Even though you have no idea what’s being discussed, you can tell simply by listening to his cadence of speech that he’s incredibly knowledgeable, and fucking good at his job. It’s clear he loves the work–and when you think back to the night before and his whispered confession that he had once dreamed of being an artist, you find yourself beaming with happiness that he’s clearly found something he loves to do. 
“People change.”
You suddenly recall his words the very first night you were there–his assurance that it didn’t matter that you had no idea what you wanted to do at your age, because there’s no promise that you’ll still want the same things in ten years. After last night, you realize that he was talking about himself in that moment.
You hope he’s happy and fulfilled.
He deserves it.
You watch him wrap up the meeting–delegating work to each member of the team and asking for updates–and every so often, as his eyes sweep around the room, they always seem to land on you.
As he promised, Marcus introduces you to Kimberley Alexander, the lawyer that his department works with most of the time. You’re nervous at first–you aren’t sure what you’re going to talk about, but you end up staying in her office through lunch, spending almost an hour and a half longer than you had intended, talking about potential jobs with the FBI.
Not because you suddenly have the desire to return to Washington, DC as soon as you can, nope. It does interest you–quite a bit, actually–but you can’t pretend that you aren’t excited at the prospect of living in the same city as Marcus. Would he want to see you again? Is he really interested in you, or is it just the forced proximity–because you’re convenient and available? If you had your own life here, would he be interested in a place in it?
When you find Emma and her dad again, they’ve clearly just come back from lunch. Emma thrusts a container into your hands, which you discover, with an exaggerated moan of satisfaction, is pad Thai.
“Must have been a good talk,” Marcus remarks. 
“Yeah, you were there for two hours,” Emma adds.
“It was good,” you nod. “Talked about, y’know, internships and stuff.”
“You wanna live here?” Emma asks, looking surprised and curious.
You try to shrug noncommittally. “Sure,” you say lightly. “It’s as good a place as any, and it would be kind of fun to work for the FBI, right?”
“I’m afraid I can’t give you an unbiased answer to that,” Marcus says with a wry smile, “but I think you’d be a great fit.”
Your heart swells at his words. “Really?”
“Absolutely,” he says earnestly. “And I hate to do this, but I’ve gotta run to do a witness interview, and you guys have to stay behind this time.”
You watch as Marcus gives Emma a quick kiss on the forehead, and your eyebrows raise in surprise at the action. They’ve gotten more comfortable around each other in the time you’ve been here, but neither of them had seemed to be very comfortable with physical affection. Marcus, for his part, is always so hesitant–wanting to reach out, but seemingly afraid that he doesn’t deserve it, or worse, that it won’t be received well. You still remember the first day you saw him–when his hand twitched toward his daughter, seemingly desperate to wrap her in a hug, but he hadn’t allowed himself to do it.
What changed?
Marcus glances at you, and gives you a slightly awkward, stiff nod before leaving for his meeting.
You busy yourself with eating lunch, digging into the container they brought you.
“Tomorrow’s the last day, huh?” Emma says conversationally.
You gulp. You’ve purposefully been putting the fact that your time here has an expiration date at the back corner of your mind. Whatever you have with Marcus, it’s temporary by its very nature, and you know it.
You just don’t really want to think about it right now.
“Yup,” you agree, mouth full of noodles. 
“What do you wanna do? I’m kind of out of ideas.”
You shrug. “We could ask Marcus if there’s anything he recommends seeing that we haven’t already been to.”
“I think we should go as far out as the metro line goes,” Emma says.
“Why?”
She shrugs. “See where we end up.”
“Whatever you want,” you tell her. “Last day is up to you.”
“How’s the pad Thai?”
“Good,” you nod, mouth full. “What’d you get?”
“Calamari,” she answers. “Never had it, wanted to try it.”
“How was it?”
“Chewy.”
You laugh, taking another bite of noodles. “Think I’ll stick to my favorite.”
The two of you huddle together on the small, two-seater couch in Marcus’s office, watching YouTube videos and laughing together until he comes back near the end of the day.
Your eyes automatically brighten when you see him return, drinking in the sight of him–the crisp lines of his suit paired with the slightly unruly hair. You discovered last night how soft it is, and how much he loves it when you thread your fingers through it and tug gently. 
He meets your eyes, but quickly drops his gaze, and you try not to sink in disappointment. Did it not mean as much to him as it did to you? Or is he just better at hiding it?
“You two hungry for dinner?” he asks, putting his stuff back in his messenger back and throwing it over his shoulder.
Emma groans loudly beside you. “Gonna be honest, I’m not really feeling dinner.”
“That was a lot of pad Thai,” you agree.
“Good,” Marcus says with a smile. “Me neither. Let’s go home and have a lazy night eating popcorn on the couch.”
The moment you arrive home, though, Emma makes a beeline for the bathroom. 
“She okay?” Marcus asks you.
You grimace at the faint sounds of retching. “Doesn’t sound like it.”
When she emerges again, Marcus hands her a glass of water with a concerned expression. “Everything okay?”
“No,” she mutters pitifully.
“Was it the calamari?” you ask.
“Please don’t say that word ever again,” Emma groans, flopping down on the couch. “Fuck. Everything hurts.”
“What do you need?” Marcus asks, looking a little lost.
“Distraction,” she mumbles. “Long movie or something.”
Emma takes up the entire couch, so you and Marcus have to sit in opposite armchairs while you watch Lord of the Rings. It’s almost unbearable to you, being so close to him and yet not being able to touch, not being able to look at him for fear of giving everything away. If you two were to lock eyes, you know that you wouldn’t be able to hide your reaction to him. So much so that even Emma, who’s still alternating between running to the bathroom and collapsing on the couch, would have no choice but to notice. 
The pull to him feels overwhelming; the only thing you can think of doing is crossing the living room and sinking into his arms. It makes you feel guilty–your best friend has food poisoning, Marucs is trying to help by refilling her water and encouraging her to drink, and here you are, with nothing to do but yearn for your best friend’s dad. 
When the movie is over, it’s late; Marcus brushes Emma’s hair back from her forehead and suggests she go lie down. As she’s stumbling toward the guest room, Marcus touches you for the first time since last night–lightly wrapping his fingers around your wrist while Emma isn’t looking.
Your eyes meet, and he gives you a coal-black stare, trying to communicate without speaking. He nods subtly, and his meaning is easy to understand.
Come to me tonight.
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You come to him in the dead of night. You lie awake, listening for Emma’s breathing to even out, and then waiting another thirty minutes after that, just to be safe. 
It’s nearly midnight when you slip into Marcus’s bedroom, but he’s still awake; his lamp is on, and he’s reading a book.
Waiting for you. 
The moment the door creaks open, Marcus casts the book aside without even marking his place, and rises to his feet. He strides forward and you meet him in the middle, a clash of mouths and hands as you come together desperately. 
“Fuck,” he whispers against your lips. “All fucking day, all I could think about was this.”
“Me too,” you mumble hastily in between kisses. 
“No idea how hard it was to concentrate on giving that meeting this morning,” he confesses, “with you in the corner looking at me with those eyes of yours.” 
He grabs your top and pulls it over your head in one swift motion and ducks down to lathe his tongue against your nipple, making you arch against him. 
“Ah!–Really?” you gasp. “I didn’t–you looked so… calm the whole day. Like it didn’t affect you the same way it affects me.”
“Doesn’t affect me?” Marcus repeats incredulously. “Honey, I am out of my mind with wanting you.” He pulls back, his palms cradling your cheeks as he stares at you with a disbelieving smile. “Do you not have any idea what you do to me?” he asks softly. 
Stunned, you shake your head.
Marcus laughs breathlessly, as he reaches down to encircle your wrist with one large hand and brings your hand forward to press against the front of his pants, where you can feel him, hard and straining against the fabric. “You feel that?” he rasps. “Do you fucking feel what you do to me?”
He shoves your flimsy sleep shorts down your legs and all but tosses you onto the bed. He strips off his own shirt and follows you down. “I’ve been half-hard all day,” he confesses. “I had to fuck my own hand in the shower this morning and still,” he groans. “As soon as I picture your face as you fall apart for me, I’m done for.”
“You thought about that?” 
“All fucking day,” Marcus promises. 
“That all you thought about?” you ask, your voice turning coy as you gain more confidence.
He chuckles darkly. “Thought about a lot of things,” he murmurs.
“Such as…?”
“Just–all the ways I want to have you.” 
“Show me,” you demand.
Marcus chuckles again. “Show you what, pretty girl?”
“All the ways that you want me.”
“That would take a lot more time than we currently have,” he says wryly. 
“Then show me how you want me most,” you say. 
“Let me get you ready first,” Marcus murmurs, starting to kiss a path down your body, intent on his destination. 
“No.”
“Hmm?”
“I want it now,” you say frankly.
“Honey–” he protests softly.
“Consider the fact that I’ve done nothing but think about what happened last night and fantasize about what’s going to happen tonight foreplay,” you tell him. “I can’t–I can’t wait. I don’t want it to be slow. I need–I need—” you trail off, searching for how exactly to find the words for what it is that you need. 
Marcus nods slowly, his eyes darkening as he watches you plead for him to take you now.
“You really want me to show you?” he asks quietly.
You nod.
“Then get on your hands and knees for me, honey.”
You comply with a shiver, your heart in your throat as you turn around and put yourself on display for him.
Marcus mutters a soft curse behind you as his palm strokes up the skin on the back of your thigh and up over the swell of your cheek. 
You hear him spit in his hand, and you know he's coating himself in it behind you, easing his way in. He does it again, and this time you whimper softly as he cups you, transferring more wetness to your folds. 
"Already so wet," he teases softly. "Tell me if it's too much."
He slides forward, sheathing himself in one fluid motion, and your elbows nearly buckle at the overwhelming feel of it. 
Marcus doesn't wait for you to adjust, this time. He starts thrusting right away, his hands grasping your hips for leverage. He's pressing right on the spot that makes pleasure sing throughout your entire body. Once he's sure that his pace isn't too much for you, he starts giving it to you harder, snapping his hips into you over and over.
Last night was overwhelming in its own way, but this–this is devastating. You thought last night was the most pleasure you could ever feel, but you had no idea that this could wreck you so completely. 
You're crying out with every thrust, each punishing snap of his hips punching little pathetic noises past your lips as you take what he needs to give you. 
"Shhh," he reminds you. "Gotta stay quiet, honey."
You drop to your elbows, burying your face in the pillows to try and muffle the involuntary sounds, but you can tell it isn't enough. 
"M-Marcus," you whimper frantically. "I can't."
"Do you want to stop?" he asks (making you shake your head rapidly), "Or do you want me to help you be quiet?"
You nod frantically, although you have no idea what he means. You'd do anything to keep feeling his cock like this. 
Marcus’s hand wraps tightly around your mouth, quieting your cries and forcing you to breathe through your nose. Something about the action makes your pussy clench violently, and Marcus makes a quiet groan of pleasure above you. 
He fucks you harder and faster, one hand sliding underneath you to rub tight circles over your clit. 
"Cum for me," he rasps brokenly above you. “Fuck, please–” 
The soft plea is enough to end you. You wail into Marcus’s hand as you come undone, and he tightens his grip, muffling the sound. 
It doesn’t take long for him to follow–just a couple more minutes of brutal thrusts that have you whimpering into his hand, oversensitive from your orgasm. The minute he stills, his cock slips from you as he immediately collapses on the bed and pulls you into his arms. You’re both still breathing heavily, but he smooths the hair back from your forehead as he looks you over.
“Are you okay?” he asks softly. “That was a lot, I’m sorry.”
“‘Re you kidding?” you slur. “That was… amazing.”
Marcus laughs and pulls you close again. “I’m glad,” he whispers, and you can hear the smile in his words. 
“Can I stay here for a little longer?” you ask. “Just a little.”
Marcus pulls back again and looks down at you with an amused smile. “It’s cute that you think I’m done with you, honey.”
Your eyes widen. “You’re not?”
“Mm-mm. Don’t think I’ll ever get tired of the way you look when you come undone,” he murmurs, tracing the tip of his index finger down the side of your cheek. “You didn’t think I’d be satisfied with just once tonight, did you?”
You giggle. “I guess not.”
He fixes you with a fiery look. “Do you trust me?” he asks quietly. 
“...Yeah?”
He raises one eyebrow. 
“Yes,” you answer, with more conviction this time. “Yes, I trust you.”
Marcus kisses you tenderly before sitting back on his heels beside you. His fingertips trail down your chest, over the peaks of your nipples, and down your stomach, as though he can’t get enough of the feel of your skin. One hand travels further down, stroking the soft patch of hair on your pubic bone before he slips one finger gently inside you. 
You cringe slightly at the wet squelch of your combined release, but Marcus shushes you gently. “Love how wet you get,” he teases affectionately. “And I like knowing I’m there inside of you.”
You clench involuntarily at his words, your lips parting as you exhale shakily. 
He chuckles. “You like that? You like knowing that I get off on the idea of you carrying a little piece of me with you?” he asks, as he starts to slowly fuck you with one finger.
“What if I told you that I was thinking about it during that meeting this morning?” he continues. “I kept wondering if there was still a little in there from last night, leaking into your underwear as I talked.”
“Shit,” you mumble. “Marcus.”
“Wanna fill you up again tonight,” he remarks casually. “So it’s still there when you’re walking around tomorrow.” He groans softly. “Fuck–Can I–Can I give you my number? I–I want you to text me. Tell me you can still feel me.”
“Oh my god,” you murmur. “Yes.”
“Good.” He adds a second finger and presses the heel of his hand against your clit, working you up to another orgasm exactly how he now knows gets you off quickly. When you start to clench around him, though, he doesn’t stop. He starts to rub quickly back and forth on that little spot inside of you until something else starts to build. 
“M-Marcus,” you murmur. “W-Wait, I–something is–”
“Shhh.” He keeps going, rubbing harder and faster until he suddenly rips his fingers from you as you gush around them, soaking his hand and the bed.
“Oh! Shit,” you cry out, panicking. “What the f–”
“Fuck, yes,” Marcus groans, the sound coming deep from within his chest. “Oh, fuck, do that again.”
When he notices your expression of utter shock, though, he pauses, a slow smile of understanding spreading across his face. 
“Honey,” he says soothingly. “Was that the first time?”
You stare up at him, mouth hanging open. “I… I kind of always thought that was a myth,” you admit, ducking your head in embarrassment. 
“Oh, baby,” he breathes softly. “No, it’s definitely not.”
He lays down beside you again, gently tucking a wisp of stray hair behind one ear. “That was so good,” he praises softly. “So good to me.”
You smile shakily, but something is starting to nag at you.
“What’s wrong?” Marcus asks, noticing your hesitant expression. 
“I just… feel really inexperienced,” you admit quietly. “You know all this stuff, and I–it must be tedious, having someone who doesn’t know what they’re doing, or–”
“No,” Marcus interrupts, his voice full of sincerity. “It’s not tedious at all. On the contrary,” he says with a little laugh, “the fact that I get to show you… that I’m the only one who can get you to do something you didn’t even know you could do–Well, shit,” he says with a crooked grin. He reaches down and palms his cock, which is hard and weeping again. “Look at what it does to me, huh?”
“Does that mean you’ll fuck me again?” you ask eagerly.
Marcus chuckles at your enthusiasm. “I did say I was going to fill you up one more time, didn’t I?”
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When you wake up (in your bed, next to Emma, after sneaking back into your own room after Marcus was finally finished with you in the wee hours of the morning), your travel companion is decidedly not ready to go. 
“I feel like I’ve been run over by a train,” she grumbles. “And my stomach is still in fucking knots.”
“We can just stay around the house,” you offer.
“I don’t want you to lay around being bored just because of me,” she protests, flopping down on the couch with a groan.
“Not feeling any better?” Marcus asks, coming into the living room. 
“No,” Emma pouts. “I’m gonna stay here and rest.”
“What are you going to do?” he asks, looking over at you.
You shrug. “I don’t really know. Stay here too, probably.”
“How about this,” Marcus says carefully. “I’m supposed to be going to the National Gallery of Art today to give a little talk about forgery detection. If you wanted to come, we could… walk around the museum a bit, afterward?”
You try to keep your face neutral at the prospect of spending a day with Marcus. Alone. 
“Sure,” you say, hoping it sounds nonchalant. “Could be fun.” 
“Great,” he says lightly. “It’s a d–it’s a plan.”
It’s a date.
You’re giddy as you wave goodbye to Emma–who’s watching daytime TV and holding a bottle of Gatorade–and follow Marcus out of the door. 
As soon as the door shuts, he rounds on you, taking your face in his hands and kissing you soundly. “So glad you said yes,” he says breathlessly. 
“Why wouldn’t I say yes to that?” you tease. “Spending the day with you.”
“I don’t know,” Marcus murmurs playfully, capturing your lips again. “Good question.”
“Is this a date?” you ask coyly.
He pauses, lips parting in surprise. “Do you want it to be?”
Taking a big leap of faith, you nod. 
Marcus’s expression softens, and he threads your fingers together. “Then it’s a date.”
After his talk–which you listen to with eager eyes and rapt attention–the two of you stroll slowly through the galleries, talking. Marcus occasionally stops, taking in the artwork, and tells you little tidbits of information about each piece. He seems to be using the quiet setting as an excuse to keep you as close as possible; his arm wraps around your waist as he leans down and talks quietly in your ear, making goosebumps rise on the back of your neck whenever he speaks. He seems to know the effect on you–you had no idea art could be described so sensually. 
You lose the afternoon to each other; having lunch in a small cafe and then walking down the National Mall, hand in hand.
You pick up a sandwich for Emma, just in case she’s feeling better, on your way home. As you get closer and closer, every step starts to feel heavier and heavier. You never want this to end. 
Just before you arrive at his building, Marcus stops and spins you around, cupping your cheek and pulling you to him for a soft kiss. 
“Today was–” he starts, but breaks off, shaking his head. 
“Yeah,” you agree.
“Listen, I don’t–I don’t know what your plans are after you leave tomorrow, but–”
“I don’t know.”
“Okay.”
You’re both dancing around something big–both of you afraid to say what you really mean, and you know it, but you can’t bring yourself to take the leap. 
You had been hoping that Marcus would.
“It was nice,” you say lamely. 
“It was,” he agrees softly. 
Emma is looking a little less green when you arrive back home, and accepts the sandwich eagerly. 
“Sorry about today,” she says, her mouth full. “I don’t know what the hell that was.”
“It was the cal–”
“Don’t fucking say it.”
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At first, when you hear Emma start to fall asleep beside you, you're paralyzed. You want to go to Marcus. This is your last night; if you want to say goodbye, you need to go to him this one last time.
You just don't know if you can face goodbye.
You don't know if you can face him. 
You aren't under any reservations about what this is. Marcus is a man, and you're nothing special. You're also nearly half his age. You gave him 'fuck me' eyes for three days, and he when he gave in to the temptation, you came willingly. But this was never meant to be a long-term arrangement. 
It was never meant to be in the first place.
You just wish your first time hadn't been with the total package. Marcus is sweet, kind, attentive, and can apparently make you cum like it was a competitive sport. How are you supposed to go back home, back to being around boys your age, and expect them to measure up?
You debate staying in bed. It would be the easiest thing to do. You could begin tonight: stuffing your feelings down and burying them deep, never letting them see the light of day again. You were on spring break, and this was a fun romp. A fling. You could leave it there and never give Marcus the goodbye he probably deserves. 
On the other hand… 
What's the harm in delaying for one more night?
You slip into his room for the third time in three days, and carefully close the door behind you. Marcus is shirtless in bed, and he beckons you over with a crooked, affectionate smile. 
"Fancy seeing you here, beautiful," he says, drawing the covers back with a playful raise of his eyebrow. 
Despite your heavy mood, you can't help but grin back and enthusiastically hop into bed beside him. 
He takes advantage immediately, grabbing you and turning you, and pulling you back against his chest with a playful growl. You're caged tightly in his arms, and there's nowhere you'd rather be.  
"This is nice," you hum contentedly. 
"Oh yeah? This all you want? Just a little cuddle?" Marcus teases, nipping gently at your shoulder. 
"What if it was?" You wiggle your hips playfully against his hardening cock.
"If that was all you wanted? Then I'd think really hard about dead puppies and my childhood neighbor Mrs. Fitzwilliam in order to calm myself down a little," he answers. 
"Mrs. Fitzwilliam?" you laugh. "Why?"
"When I was a little boy, I was convinced she was a witch. I couldn't so much as talk to her for years."
"Stop it, no you did not."
"I wouldn't joke about that," he laughs. "I was really scared of her!"
"Do me a favor and don't think about her," you tease. "I like how it feels against me."
"Would feel better somewhere else," Marcus says darkly. 
"Have somewhere in mind, do you?"
"I've had it on my mind all day," he says softly. 
"Show me," you murmur. "Show me what's been on your mind all day."
"Wanna know what I was picturing while I was giving that little forgery talk?" Marcus asks.
"Obviously."
"Then sit up, pretty girl."
He loosens his hold on you and you sit up, unable to keep the grin off your face. He sits up too, gently taking hold of the hem of your shirt and drawing it up over your head. He hooks his thumbs under the waistband of your shorts. 
"Help me out with these," he commands quietly. 
You shimmy them down your hips and kick them off, still kneeling before him, now completely bare. Marcus sits back on the headboard and pats his thigh suggestively, giving you a wicked smile. 
"C'mere."
You giggle and bite your lip nervously as you crawl forward and straddle him.
"Wanna see you just like this," he murmurs. 
"I–I've never–"
"I know," he interrupts with a wry smile. "I've got you. Just wanna see you like this," he confesses, palming your jaw and rubbing his thumb across your cheekbone.
Your eyes start to flutter shut as you feel the tip of him breach you as you sink slowly down. 
"Eyes on me, honey." 
With a shaky breath, you open them again, holding Marcus's intense gaze as you impale yourself on his cock. Your lips part, eyebrows pinching together at the stretch of him–you don't think you'll ever get used to the feeling of being broken open for the first time. 
"That's it," he whispers. "Just like that." 
You slowly rock your hips, rising up and sinking back down again. You feel so full like this; your lips part and a breathy gasp escapes you as you feel the drag of Marcus’s cock inside of you. 
This is the first time you've chased your own pleasure with him like this; Marcus's eyes rake over your form greedily and as you ride him, you start to feel overly conscious of his scrutiny.
"Do I look okay?" you ask shyly.
Marcus makes a disbelieving noise and surges up, his hands starting to guide the movement of your hips as he kisses you messing, trailing from your mouth to your neck as he flexes up into you.
"Are you kidding?" he asks softly. "You're ethereal. A fucking goddess in my bed. And if you're thinking about that, I'm not fucking you right."
"That's a lie," you say with a lazy smile. "You're very thorough."
"Oh yeah? You like how I fuck you?"
"Mmmhmm," you hum. "Liked what you were doing last night."
Marcus chuckles deep in his throat. "Is that so? Cum for me like this, honey, and I'll put you on your knees again."
When his thumb presses into your clit, rubbing in small circles, it doesn't take you long to start to feel the pleasure growing in your core. You start moving faster, bouncing on his cock, no longer caring if your body is jiggling too much or that your face might look silly contorted with pleasure; all you can think about is chasing that feeling that’s building inside of you. Marcus helps you along, thrusting up into you, and you swear he must get deep enough to feel the very end of you. 
He whispers little praises and encouragements in your ear in that deep, raspy way his voice gets when he’s drunk on pleasure. You can recognize all his little foibles, now–the way he wiggles his wrist back and forth when something’s on his mind, the way he talks with his hands when he’s passionate about a subject, and the way he sounds when he comes undone.
You’re going to carry all of those things with you, now–the way his eyes crinkle when he smiles, the way he raises one eyebrow when he’s being playful, and the way he sometimes mouths along to the words of his favorite old movies.
Is it possible to miss someone so completely after just one week?
You’re so deep in your emotions when you cum, you barely even realize that you’re about to until you’re clenching hard around him, grinding down on his cock as he works you through it, guiding your hips with his fingers pressing hard into your skin.
You’re still in a daze as Marcus flips you over, depositing you on your back and then turning you over onto your stomach on the bed. Rather than pull you up to your knees like the night before, he straddles you like this and sinks back into you, draping himself over your back as he starts to really fuck you.
Oh. This might be your favorite position yet–it’s the same angle as it was last night with the added bonus of getting to feel the weight of this man pressing down on you. His chest is against your back, his ragged breaths in your ear. His elbows cage your face and he entangles your fingers together over your head. It’s a sensory overload in nearly every way, and you’re drowning in the feel of him.
It’s so good that you feel your core start to tighten again.
“So soon?” Marcus teases breathlessly in your ear. “Fuck, I can feel you shaking. How are you so fucking perfect, hmm? You always feel like you were made to take me.”
His words inexplicably cause a lump to build in your throat. Made to take him, but this couldn’t, by definition, last. The statement only makes you wish that your compatibility didn’t have to be so fucking temporary. 
You’re teetering on a precipice–on the verge of both an orgasm and inexplicable tears. When Marcus gently brushes the shell of your ear with his lips and murmurs one last, soft sentence, you finally succumb to both.
“You can let go, honey. I’ve got you.”
You convulse with a wet sob, pleasure and sorrow overtaking you simultaneously. Blessedly, with your face buried in the pillow, Marcus doesn’t notice yet; he starts fucking into you with abandon until he lets go with a deep groan in your ear. 
When he finally stills, and he starts peppering kisses across your shoulder blade, you can feel him stiffen when he realizes that, mortifyingly, there are tears on your cheeks.
“Shit,” Marcus breathes. He carefully slips out of you and turns you over underneath him, quickly brushing the tears at the corners of your eyes. He kisses them away, whispering softly to you.
“Did I hurt you?” he asks frantically. “Honey, look at me.”
“No!” you exclaim emphatically. “No, I–I don’t know why I’m doing this.”
“Talk to me,” he demands softly.
“I don’t–I don’t want to go home,” you whisper. “I don’t want this to end.”
“Oh, honey,” Marcus whispers. “Really?”
“Sorry,” you mumble. “I’m sure this is exactly what you’re looking for–for some girl to get attached to you after one whole week of knowing you…”
Marcus smiles and brushes his thumb against your cheekbone. “Attached to me?”
“I didn’t mean for it to happen,” you say. “You’re just really nice, and you’re gorgeous, and you’ve been so good to me–”
“Don’t cry,” he whispers. “Please don’t cry.”
"Sorry," you say again.
"Hey," he says softly, still stroking your cheek. "You know something? You're wrong. You're not 'some girl.' You're sweet, and funny, and cute, and maybe having this girl right here be attached to me after one whole week of knowing me is exactly what I'm looking for."
"What are you suggesting?" you ask bluntly. 
“All I’m suggesting is that we stay in touch,” Marcus answers. “No pressure, no expectations. We talk, and we get to know each other better, and when you graduate, Miss Pre-Law,” he teases, lightly touching the tip of your nose, “if you still feel the same way, come back to me. Go to Law School at Georgetown. Get an internship at the FBI. And whatever it is that you do, I know of a place you can stay.”
"You'd really want that?" you ask, a slow smile starting to spread across your face.
"I'd be a fool not to grab onto this with both hands," he murmurs, stroking his hand down your side. "A damn fool."
"What about Emma?"
Marcus pauses, biting his lip. "She's a grown woman," he says carefully, "and I haven't had much of a place in her life growing up. I would hope that… once we see where this goes–if it goes anywhere–she'd understand."
You nod slowly. "Okay."
"I've rushed into things in the past," he says softly. "More than once. But I'm not in any rush right now. I want to take my time, get to know you, and if you're still looking at me the way you're looking at me right now in a year, I'll consider myself a lucky man."
Your smile is brilliant. "I'd like that."
"I'd like that, too. And that means tomorrow isn't goodbye, anymore." 
"No?"
"Nope," Marcus says with a grin. "Just 'see you later.'"
"Can I still get a goodbye kiss?" you ask.
He shakes his head playfully, but his lips descend to meet yours anyway. 
"Not a goodbye kiss," he teased.
"A 'see you later' kiss," you correct. 
"A 'you are so goddamn beautiful that I can't help to kiss you' kiss."
"You're making this too complicated."
"An 'I'll call it whatever I damn well please' kiss."
"An 'everything's gonna be alright' kiss?" you ask hopefully. 
Marcus smiles and kisses you long and deep. "Especially that."
– – – – – 
One year later…
“May I present: the graduating class of 2024.”
Along with Emma and the rest of the seniors in the auditorium, you throw your mortar-board hat into the air, shrieking happily as someone else’s crashes down on your head, instead. 
“Fucking finally!” Emma shouts beside you, and you grin widely. 
The last year has been a whirlwind for the both of you, and you know it. 
After reconnecting with her dad, Emma made an effort not to lose touch again. Eventually, he had opened up about his past and the circumstances surrounding his divorce, and at her urging, even began the process of making peace with her mom. They even had Christmas together, for the first time since Emma was two. 
And how do you know all this?
Well, Marcus hadn’t lost touch with you, either. 
True to his word, you both took your time and got to know each other from a distance. Talking to him was still as easy as breathing, and you’d spend entire nights at the beginning staying up far too late and talking well into the wee hours of the morning. 
It wasn’t hard to see that the something that was between you was still there and not going away any time soon. And the only thing you’ve found so far that rivals the strength of your friendship is the passion that you continue to have for each other in the bedroom.
Marcus would make trips when he could–some visits ostensibly to see Emma and other, more secret trysts where his only aim was to see you. (And see you he did; on most occasions, he’d barely let you out of his hotel room.)
Your beginning may have been a meteoric collision–two people forced into proximity that had no choice but to fall into each other–but the growth of your resulting love was slow and careful.
Eventually, you’d need to tell Emma, but it didn’t feel like the time was quite right, yet. Of course, when she visits you at Georgetown next year and you give her not your own address, but her father’s, the two of you will have to come clean. 
Right now, though, as you and Emma weave through the crowds of people looking for Marcus, you’re content to keep things the way they are. Everything is slowly falling into place, and that piece of the puzzle will fit into the rest when it’s ready.
“There she is!”
Emma beams as she hears Marcus call out, waving his hand frantically to catch your attention among the sea of people. 
She lets herself be crushed into a hug, her father grinning proudly and murmuring something unintelligible into her ear. After a few minutes, he releases her and turns to you.
“Congratulations,” he says–perfunctorily, but warmly. 
“Thank you.”
After a couple of beats, Emma rolls her eyes.
“Would you just kiss her already? Honestly, it’s more weird that you’re not.”
Two sets of eyes swivel to her in alarm.
“You… you knew?” you exclaim.
Emma gives you a disbelieving look. “Okay, the fact that you two both think you were being subtle means you might actually be meant for each other. Wow.”
“How?” you choke out.
“Are you serious? You two had bizarre energy when you met, and ever since, I see you smiling at your phone all the time,” Emma says to you. “And after that week, whenever he’s come to visit, you both act weird around each other.”
“Oh,” you say dumbly.
“Plus, you had a hickey on your neck one morning,” she says, rolling her eyes. “Real subtle.”
Oops. You shoot Marcus a look, and notice that he’s as red as a tomato. 
“Em,” he starts, looking pained.
“It’s fine,” she interrupts. “Look, it’s not like we had the closest of relationships when I was a kid. I'm getting to know you as an adult, and it just feels different than it would be if you had raised me. I’m not going to say it doesn’t make me feel fucking weird, and I don’t ever wanna know details about your sex life and I am not calling you ‘mom,’ but I guess I’ll just say… I get it. You two are oddly similar, and I wouldn’t want to stand in between you and happiness. Because I… you know. I love you.”
“Emma,” Marcus says, his smile turning watery for a moment. 
“Don’t… make a big deal out of it,” she grumbles.
“Wouldn’t dream of it,” he laughs, and gives her a sweet kiss on the forehead. “I love you too, Emmie.”
He pulls back and looks at you, his eyes sparkling, and you feel your insides start to heat up just from his gaze alone.
Those words are still new, between you–the first time was whispered softly in his ear in the darkness after spending all night wrapped around each other just a couple of months ago. Marcus whispered them back immediately after; he was achingly patient and careful to take his time with you, even though you’d felt that emotion emanating from each of you for months prior.
It was just–you didn’t want to rush things. Love was new to you. Everything was. And if Marcus was going to be your first experience with all of it, you had a feeling that you were going to want to savor it.
You know he feels the same.
Stepping forward, Marcus gently tips your chin up to meet him in a gentle kiss. The shape of his lips are so familiar now, you could probably draw them in your sleep. You know the way they move against yours. You know how it feels when he smiles against your mouth–which he does often, and right now.
“Congratulations,” he murmurs again. This time, the word is dark and full of underlying emotion–love, affection, friendship, pride–and you grin back as you kiss him once more.
“What now?” you ask with a little laugh.
“I have a few ideas,” he husks in your ear, inaudible to anyone else, before pulling back. “But right now?” he shrugs. “Anything you want. Everything.”
“What if I said that all I wanted was you?”
Marcus’s eyes soften. “Well, honey,” he says gently, “you’re in luck, because that’s the one thing I can give you.”
The end.
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