sparrowlucero · 27 days ago
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this is the iconic dinosaur horror jurassic park wishes it was
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#so there's this person on twitter who is like an infamous drama starter and got a whole forum shut down once#and they wrote this (different) book that's one of the greatest so bad it's good things i've ever read#a few great things that happen in that:#characters get in a car crash and flee on foot. later it's casually mentioned one character had both her legs amputated 'due to fractures'#the character pretending to be american by wearing maga hats that have spy gear built into them#the spy gear in question is an alarm that blares if someone lies in their vicinity#'stuff protocol ' said the queen. 'i'm getting hammered tonight'#the chapter where the prime minister is trying to watch the news so she keeps wandering into bars and tv shops and getting kicked out#the dragon that's casually described as 'about the size of 1000 elephants'#the dragon that's a 'dog dragon hybrid with a chihuahua body and a giant dragon head'#the dragon that's owner punched it in the face and only lets people approach if they 'do the iconic royal wave'#the characters being described as 'the short one' 'the guy with the beard' etc#but there being a lengthy detailed description of the characters in harry potter#'apparently a dragon had burnt essex to cinders in a matter of minutes'#anyways i found out they also wrote (a political parody of indiana jones???) for this book of kids short stories years ago#and you know. we needed to know#so it took me like 4 months to track this precious lost media down#which was very worth it because it turns out it's full of many other iconic gems like CELLAR HELL by Elizabeth Elgie (12)
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