#chanyeol soft pack | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

sooinbloom · 5 months ago

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genre: fluff, one shot, Chanyeol!AU, EXO!AU, romance

word count: 2,247

theme: established relationship, springtime romance, long distance

warnings: none, just a slightly spicy scene

summary: Park Chanyeol has been dating his long distance girlfriend, Nina, for a two years. Every year he travels to her hometown, Hirosaki, for the cherry blossom festival. This year, he’s going to make the biggest move yet - asking her to marry him.

song that inspired this one shot: be my love by EXO-CBX

requested by: @loeyyuniverse

request fics here (:

Chanyeol loved springtime in Japan.

That’s almost an understatement, considering that he made an annual pilgrimage to Hirosaki just for the cherry blossom festival. It became a tradition with his best friend, Kyungsoo, when they were in their university days. Of course he enjoyed his time with his dearest friend, walking the park and gazing up at the bright spring blooms on the trees but over time there was another reason he enjoyed coming to this city every year.

Around the fourth annual trip to Japan, Chanyeol and Kyungsoo were looking for a café to grab coffee before enjoying the blooms on a brisk Saturday morning. While on the search, he saw the most beautiful girl in a café window, her eyes bright with a warm smile as she took the orders of patrons sitting at a small table. Her hair fell off of her shoulder like a midnight-colored waterfall, her cute nods and smirks stopped him dead in his tracks.

He knew he had to have her. Kyungsoo caught on and immediately dragged his love-stricken best friend in the café. Even with resistance, Kyungsoo managed to get him over the threshold of the café door and inside to see this mysterious girl. It was unusual for Chanyeol to be nervous when talking to girls and Kyungsoo knew it. It was all the more enjoyable to see Chanyeol bumbling around like a nervous teenager while speaking to this girl.

“What’s your name?” Chanyeol stutters.

“Nina.” As soon as her name left her mouth, it engrained itself in Chanyeol’s mind and etched into his heart. It sounded like the breeze when it combed through the air on a bright spring morning just like this one.

Surprisingly, Chanyeol managed to get Nina’s number that day. Ever since, they slowly fell for each other over texts and video calls. For two years, the trip to Japan became another chance to see his love. Being with Nina made Chanyeol feel like he was on fire. It was the only way he could describe it. In every sense of the word, she made him warm. She made him passionate. She made him love her endlessly in all of the ways he never expected to love anyone.

Chanyeol hated it when their romantic rendezvouses would come to an end. He’d keep her close in his arms the night before he had to fly back home, kissing her soft skin and promising not to let another year go by until she was in his arms again. They never intended to be long distance, but they had to because life seemed to hold them at separate pinpoints on a globe. That is, until Chanyeol decided to move the pins much closer than they ever were before.

“This year, my sweet love, will be the last year of missing each other,” he said into his phone as he got undressed from a long day at work. His suitcase lay open as he simultaneously packed for the trip.

“Oh? Why… is that?” Nina replied, amused at the less confident tone in Chanyeol’s voice. It was unusual. He was up to something.

“I transferred to the Japanese headquarters of the company. I’ll be moving to Tokyo.” Chanyeol grins into the phone.

“Are you serious?” She gasps, unable to control her smile.

“I’m serious. You’re opening the café in Tokyo and I miss the chance of waking up to your beautiful smile every morning.”

“Will we still…”

“Don’t worry, my love, we will still meet in Hirosaki this year. I promise. And it’s going to be our favorite trip.”

The day Chanyeol and Nina reunited at the airport was the ultimate daydream come true, it always was. Nina welcomed him in her usual run-and-pounce greeting she gave him at the airport. Oddly, this time he was alone. Usually, Kyungsoo and his girlfriend, Aria, would tag along on these trips, but Nina surmised that maybe it wasn’t going to happen like usual this year.

Once the greetings and kisses were all but done, Chanyeol hailed a cab and took control of the situation. The couple cuddled in the backseat of the cab, fingers entwined with Nina’s head perched on Chanyeol’s shoulder, something she could only do if they were both sitting down. Being with a man almost an entire foot taller than you had its hits and misses, the novelty at times fell short when it really counted.

“Your castle awaits you, my love.” Chanyeol steps out of the cab and throws his arm toward a small house in the midst of the cherry blossom trees. It was homey, like it was plopped from middle earth.

“Is this for us?” Nina shyly smirks. The moon had already taken its place in the sky, it made the magic of the moment heighten in Nina’s curious eyes.

“Of course, now come on. Let’s settle in.” Chanyeol insists excitedly. Once they walked into their home for the week, the walls embraced them with a cozy atmosphere. The wooden floors creaked under their feet as they moved deeper into the small four walls, dimly lit by soft yellow light that made the place feel like an old classic novel. If Nina didn’t know any better, she felt as though she were transported into another dimension where cottage-core was everyone’s way of life, not just her imagination’s. Chanyeol ducked through the doorways and took note of the seemingly ancient record player in the center of the living room.

His eyes scanned the small stack of records, old big band from the 1940’s was right at the top. It was a necessary amenity he knew he’d need at the perfect moment on their trip. Once the couple reached the bedroom, he set their luggage on the floor and helplessly gazed into his beloved’s welcoming eyes.

“What do you think?” Chanyeol asked nervously. He craved Nina’s approval, he yearned to see that beautiful smile upturn onto her face. Once Nina gave her nod of approval, and the showing of teeth Chanyeol was banking on, he immediately took her into his arms and brushed his eager lips onto hers. Savoring the moment, he gently lay her down on the bed, slowly sliding her sweater off of her shoulders. Planting kisses on her neck and taking in her scent, sweet nothings fell out of his mouth and onto her ears.

It didn’t take long for the long-distance lovers to get lost in each other, making up for lost time and desperate miles between them. They held each other and collided in kisses and soft touches for what seemed like the entire night. Chanyeol stopped at nothing to make her feel like the only woman in the world. He took her in his arms and melted their bodies together in a collision of sweet and obscene.

He drank her in with his senses, he had no problem being desolate in her, because with her is where he was found. Chanyeol only hoped that the momentum of their romance would continue to play out tomorrow, because he was about to put all of his cards on the table for her and there was no looking back.

After lattes and pastries in the morning, Chanyeol set off on his mission to make this the most memorable day for Nina. They wandered Hirosaki, taking in the sights of the cherry blossoms swaying on the tree branches. He held her hand as they walked through her favorite bookstore, allowing her to buy whatever she wanted. There was absolutely no limit when it came to Nina. Anything she wanted; Chanyeol was happy to give it to her.

Cherry blossom petals were in her hair, and he didn’t dare take one of them away from her. He loved her this way, she was so cute in her yellow and white checkered dress that she insisted on wearing today. He kissed her on street corners and proudly had her on his arm, he envisioned his life like this every single day. It had to be this way, its the only way that was right.

He adored how the sun made her shine even more brightly than she already did. The dainty box in his pocket was starting to burn a hole in his pants but it never seemed to be the right time to bring it up. He hoped his anxiety wasn’t so obvious on his face. After they wandered every street and saw every sight to see, the couple went back to their small house amongst the soft cherry blossoms.

“I had the best day today, Yeolie!” Nina beamed up at her amorous lover. He grinned down at her, combing his black hair back with his long fingers. Nina couldn’t help but bite her lip at the way his undercut suited him so well, or how his Rolex gleamed in the light as he tossed his hair back. Suddenly, the mood changed. Chanyeol pulled out a bottle of Cabernet, rummaging the cabinets for wine glasses but he only seemed to find regular, cherry blossom themed glasses with pink stained blooms on the sides that looked like they belonged in his grandmother’s house.

“What are you doing?” Nina giggled.

“Spoiling my princess… With granny cups of wine.” Chanyeol muttered, disappointed in his failed efforts. With a soft hand, Nina brought his chin up so he could look her in the eye.

“You’re so cute.” She sweetly chided. She took her cup and clinked it with Chanyeol’s, his arm now secure around her waist. With a sudden jerk, Chanyeol walked over to the old record player in the living room, putting the needle on the record he spotted last night, a familiar melody filled the air.

“Come here. Dance with me.” Chanyeol smiles, offering his hand to Nina.

“Don’t mind if I do.” She blushed, taking him up on his offer. Nina allowed Chanyeol to lead, as clumsy as he was. She found it charming how he would trip over his two feet when he got nervous. She’d never tell him that she knew how hyper aware he became of every tiny detail when they were together. They swayed gently (and awkwardly) to the big band song she loved so much but could never remember the name of. They finished their wine and kept dancing, the alcohol making them sway a little bit more than normal.

“You still have cherry blossoms in your hair.” Chanyeol whispers, combing her hair back with his fingers. Nina reaches for her hair, but Chanyeol playfully swats her hand away.

“No, leave them. It makes you look like springtime.”

“I’m sorry but that’s the cheesiest thing you’ve ever said to me.” Nina chuckles, Chanyeol just brings her closer.

“You act like I am not the most charming man in the world. You should feel honored.” He cockily states, puffing his chest. Nina playfully pushes Chanyeol’s shoulder, then rests her head against it. The pounding of his heart was evident, but why? She felt him slowly inhale, then exhale. Chanyeol stopped their dancing and took Nina’s hands into his.

“I have to tell you something.”

Oh god. He’s breaking up with me. Nina’s mind went in at least six different directions as Chanyeol said those six words.

“Y-you do?”

“Nina… Listen. I…” Chanyeol bends his knees, debating on kneeling or standing. He settles for somewhere in the middle with red cheeks.

“I… Nina…”

“Are you breaking up with me?” Nina blurts, Chanyeol rapidly shakes his head.

“No! Love. Baby. Nina… I just… Why do you have to look at me like that?”

“Like what?!” Nina exclaims, confused by the sudden change in the mood.

“Like that!” Chanyeol motions toward her face.

“What am I supposed to do?!”

“LET ME ASK YOU TO MARRY ME!” Chanyeol blurts, the with wide eyes, covers his mouth. Nina’s jaw drops as Chanyeol turns from her for a moment, then returns to her gaze. He drops to his knee right next to the open window; cherry blossom petals blow into the house and soften the moment.

“Nina. I can’t imagine another year of you on my screen. I fell in love with you in the café down the street two years ago. I want those two years to turn into twelve. Those twelve to twenty. Those twenty to forty and onto forever. I love you more than life itself, and any time I think of spring and see cherry blossoms, I think of you and how you made my life so much brighter. Baby… Will you marry me?”

Chanyeol shakily opens the dainty box that housed Nina’s dream engagement ring, nestled in between a black velvet cushion. The center stone glistened in the low light, a soft cherry blossom pink. Every single moment they shared flashed before her eyes and led up to this very moment, with Chanyeol’s boba eyes begging her for an answer. Nina gets down on her knees with Chanyeol and nods.

“Yes, Yeolie. I’ll marry you.” Nina grins, allowing Chanyeol to slide the ring on her finger. He stands and brings her up into his arms, kissing her lips in fervent need.

“I love you. I love you so much.” Chanyeol whispers in between kisses. This moment was everything he hoped it would be. The cards were on the table, showing two hearts. He remembered to thank Kyungsoo for dragging him into the café that day, because if he didn’t… He wouldn’t be in this moment with the love of his life.

His forever love.

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the-casual-cheesecake · 1 year ago

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WHAT A GREAT QUESTION, ANON! I have been wildly (and uncharacteristically for me, an ex omegaverse hater) obsessed with omegaverse Exos since I got into Exo, and my thoughts on them recently changed drastically, so what good timing you have!

I’ll first start with saying that I don’t like betas, and never include them in any thoughts about omegaverse. I just think they’re boring– though I do have friends who have managed to make them VERY interesting; I just think I don’t have anything insightful or interesting to say about them myself.

And for a second note, I think it’s important to describe what I think omegaverse is for really: because it has many meanings that change based on who’s writing in it. For me, omegaverse makes most sense as a formalization of power dynamics. One could make the argument that it’s inherently kinky (and in fact, I do). It’s less about inherent sexuality OR gender, and more about inherent power structures and how someone could play with them. This is not to say that interesting discussions can’t happen in omegaverse about sexuality or gender– because they absolutely can and do, but I think mostly, it’s about biological power, in a way that our actual society thinks exists and tries to enforce (violently and forcefully), that is actually made real via omegaverse.

For the Fandom Olds among us, this interpretation would not come as a surprise, considering omegaverse took the place of BDSM AUs in fandom!

A third note, all of my omegaverse content always and forever will be poly! Poly packs 5eva!!!

ANYWAY, EXOS!

[vibrates] they are pack, your honor…

Pack alpha: Minseok

Alphas: Junmyeon, Jongdae, Chanyeol, Kyungsoo

Omegas: Yixing, Baekhyun, Jongin, Sehunnie

Minseok:

As the oldest, and from the fact that Minseok in canon refused to be Exo-M’s leader, it just makes so much sense for him to be the pack alpha but not the band leader. He has the character of a supervisor dom. He’s not involved with everyone in the band and entangled with them– because, frankly, they are too loud and too messy, and he has no energy to deal with so many people needing his attention and involvement. But he is a steady presence that they can all depend on. He listens to their problems and pets them about them. He scruffs the alphas into place when necessary (and reassures them that even if they fuck up, he’ll be there to help), and spends time with the omegas when they need him, and makes sure that their needs are taken care of and that they don’t feel too lost in the pack.

I’m pretty sure that even in omegaverse, Minseok is queer, and he probably prefers alphas to omegas; less mess, and more satisfaction in bringing them to heel.

Naturally, the person he’s closest to in the pack is Jongdae, this is canon in any and all universes. They’re the gossip husbands, drinking late at night and talking about the rest of the band like two intensely invested aunties, but being steady and gentle with the others the rest of the time. They probably sleep together, but they’re definitely not monogamous, and as in canon, probably are both aware that Jongdae would actually like to settle down with a mate at some point.

Minseok spends the omegas’ heats with them if they want him to, as do all the alphas– because the Exos are all very very busy and alternate being with the omegas depending on their schedules. His favorite is probably Sehunnie though, because Sehun is whiny but pliant and obedient in heat; the rest are complicated (will get to them!)

Junmyeon:

I imagine him to be as neurotic in omegaverse as he is in canon. He’s a sadist and is terrified of this fact. He takes his job as leader so seriously that it fucks with his head and makes him make very strange personal decisions. He’s an alpha and a dom, but the fact that he’s so scared of his sadism makes him show his belly to his pack and try so hard to be gentle and soft that the overcorrection makes him seem awkward instead.

I think, if I were to transplant canon onto omegaverse, that Junmyeon did not overcorrect so hard until a while after debut; because at first he would punish the Exos for mistakes as harshly as a supervisor, and oooof that probably gave him such a headrush that it turned into kink for him IMMEDIATELY.

Junmeon is Like This in canon really, so what makes omegaverse so much worse for him is that it formalizes all the power dynamics in head in a way that makes it so easy to take advantage of. And he is so convinced the sadism makes him a bad person, that having omegas begging for him in heat, crying and in pain without him even having to do a single thing to them except be there, simply would take him to pieces. Just imagine canon Junmyeon with the power to bite someone and claim them biologically forever… the man wrote the Exos’ names on his damn body, he would lose his fucking mind!!!

Anyway, I think therefore, that Junmyeon is terrified MOST of Baekhyun and Yixing, the resident omega masochists in the band– and to an extent, Chanyeol, who is a masochist but not omega. So, I would imagine him being SO WEIRD with all three of them. Too strict and mean to Chanyeol, and so wary as to almost be avoidant of Yixing, and strangely both overprotective and overconfident in Baekhyun.

Hilariously, he and Sehun click very comfortably, because Sehun isn’t a masochist or a sub. He’s just very into being indulged and having things done for him and to him, and it makes him vibe enough like a sub that it’s hot, but not enough to terrify Junmyeon or cause him to have intense sadistic emotion about Sehun. This also means they’re not super compatible actually lmao, they’re just comfortable enough that they stick together.

I think Junmyeon and Minseok have an interesting relationship, where Minseok would like to be hyung and head alpha for Junmyeon but Junmyeon is too weird about being perceived to be submitting to anyone that whenever Minseok tries to support him, Junymeon just pretends to be Fine™ harder.

Generally though, Junmyeon is a good leader. He’s incredibly competent when it comes to the band’s relationships with management, and he’s incredibly protective and invested in the wellbeing of his pack members. All of his weirdness sort of impacts him internally, but it works to present him the way he desires his image to be externally.

Yixing:

[vibrates] He… the baby…

He’s an omega and a sub. He came into the band with much Trauma™ (familial, as in canon D: ), which made him need so much affection and love that it makes him seem hungry. He pushes himself so hard that it makes him ill often, and it makes it difficult to care about him, because to do so means people have to constantly love him and see him be hurt. He doesn’t have the instincts that lets him trust people to catch him if he falls, so he simply always feels that he’s on his own, even if he isn’t.

In omegaverse, he probably has very difficult heats. Trauma and hormone fuckery do not go well together in any universe, so his heats probably fuck with his emotions massively. And the fact that most of his injuries are spine-related, means that his pelvic floor is just fucked, and would mean his heats actually physically hurt!!!!

The emotional part means that during his heats, he clings so hard to the people next to him to make sure they don’t leave, that he leaves bruises and scratch marks. He probably cries and howls if any of the alphas get up to get him food because he’s scared they’re not coming back and that he’ll be abandoned. He probably wants to be mated and sobs when he isn’t, even though outside of heat he would know it would be a bad idea to mate.

The physical part means he’s in miserable (very unusual) pain throughout.

This makes it a large ordeal to deal with for the pack. Especially considering they are all so tired and so busy and barely have time to rest anyway. And the fact that they have a rotational system for alphas spending time with the in-heat omegas so they don’t miss schedules, which in Yixing’s case simply doesn’t work.

They do love him, but he’s difficult to help. It stresses everyone out and makes the alphas feels horrible and bad at their jobs.

Yixing probably gets on suppressants at some point and simply never comes off them, especially when he starts spending more time in China without any pack around :(

Outside of heat, he smells sweet and is comforting to be around. He’s so skin hungry that he’ll always want to cling to a pack member when they’re home, which they are only happy to do. And he’s good at being hyung to the younger members. He’s also massively good at his job as an artist, it just, you know, kills his body oops… TT

Being away from the pack does make everything worse for him, though. It’s a sore subject for Junmyeon and Minseok especially, that they let one of their pack omegas run off that way where they can’t help him at all. It makes everyone sad.

[Cake lies down on the floor] Yeah… Yixing…

Baekhyun:

He’s an omega, a sub, and a sadist (masochist too, fun combo!) Baekhyun is highly invested in being important to everyone. He wants to be loved so much that he wants to own all the Exos and be owned by all of them, but he’s very aware of how this sounds so he’s just privately insane about this, but publicly all jokey and fun, rather than deeply intense.

The fact that he’s a sadist makes him a strange omega for alphas. So, I bet Baekhyun enjoys being with the omegas most often– bet it almost makes him think he’s like Minseok, and likes omegas more than alphas; but that’s not true. What he really needs is an alpha who would put a hand on his neck and put him in his place but also lets him bite and scratch and be mean to them as well. He needs to sub for his health and well being, but he also needs to feel that it’s safe to sub by being allowed to do horrible things to his alpha/dom and feel like he has power in the relationship. Subbing is so so vulnerable for Baekhyun, it makes him terrified to his bones, but he also wants it really badly.

Anyway, as in canon lmao, Minseok finds Baekhyun too messy and difficult to deal with, so he just flirts and toys with him a little, and probably sleeps with Baekhyun during heats if he’s needed, but doesn’t really let Baekhyun in his bed outside of heat.

Chanyeol is too vulnerable to deal with Baekhyun’s barbed wire words and pointy claws, he takes it too personally, and Baekhyun has to be careful around him. Though when Baekhyun is careful, they’re good friends, and Baekhyun does enjoy sleeping with him and toying with him a little.

Sehunnie is probably Baekyun’s go-to for sex outside of heats (points to the unreal amounts of Baekhyun biting Sehun photos in canon.)

Junmyeon and and Baekhyun are insanely compatible but they have no idea. Junmyeon is terrified of being too much and hurting people but if he actually does hurt Baekhyun (sexy), Baekhyun would lose his goddamn mind. Because Baekhyun needs intensity most of all, he needs to feel like his partner is obsessed with him: and Junmyeon is the most intense person in this band.

Kyungsoo and Baekhyun probably have good sex, but Kyungsoo has absolutely no tollerance for Baekhyun trying to exercise power– which is hot! But you know, it doesn’t let Baekhyun relax entirely with him. It’s the same with Jongdae probably, except Jongdae is nicer about it.

Chanyeol:

He’s an alpha but he’s not interested in holding power over people, it makes him deeply uncomfortable. He’s not a dom, and not a sub, but he does enjoy power games when they’re meant to bring people closer together and build trust.

He frequently goes through periods of being super insecure about how he presents as an alpha, and trying to be more masc and domineering, but it only ever ends up making him feel worse. And during those periods, he often feels like going to the other alphas for help and support is a weakness and tries to do everything himself, including figuring out his own mental blocks– this almost never works.

He clashes with Junmyeon a lot, because he both wants Junmyeon’s attention and admiration and praise, and wants Junmyeon’s to see him as an alpha and respect his authority, and Junmyeon is, as stated before, WEIRD about power things!!!

Though Minseok knows how to be good to Chanyeol and often compensates where Junmyeon fails. So does Jongdae, though he spent a while not really understanding why Chanyeol is the way he is and why he struggles with the things he struggles with.

Kyungsoo’s steadiness and assuredness in himself makes him a good friend to Chanyeol. It helps to look to Kyungsoo when Chanyeol is in flux and feels like nothing is static enough to hold onto.

Sechan are like canon Sechan, naturally. They are weird about power dynamics together in a way that helps both of them. It makes Chanyeol feel at ease that he’s not holding any power via the fact that he’s alpha or hyung over Sehun, and it makes Sehun happy to feel like he holds Chanyeol’s leash and can make him do whatever he wants. What Sehun often wants Chanyeol to do though, is to take care of things for him: take care of food and buying things, and making sure Sehun is comfortable, to fuck Sehun well and not make Sehun do things, and to praise Sehun in front of other people and let Sehun bask in the fact that he’s getting everything he wants. All of this makes Chanyeol feel good and useful and like a good alpha! It’s great!

Jongdae:

He’s one of the people I hesitated for a very long time before assigning an omegaverse dynamic to. I eventually settled on alpha because he’s a caretaker and – although subtle– is actually a little bit of a control freak. He also finds too much contentment in, for example, calming Baekhyun down and making him behave, for him not to be some sort of flavor of dom.

He and Minseok fit well together because they both respect hierarchies a lot, and they respect inner pack workings. They also have the same casual but firm way that they approach their own internal moral compasses. They’re both stubborn and hard to convince to change, which makes them both comfortable, considering they are also both very influential and find it easy to change other people just by being around. They make each other feel safe to exercise the full breadth of their inherent power without the threat that this would affect the other in any way.

The fact that they are both doms, however, makes them incompatible long-term as sexual and romantic partners, even though they adore each other and probably do sleep together often. It’s a fact they are both aware of– though I am unsure if they both feel the axact same way about it. I change my mind often about this. Is Minseok sadder than Jongdae about this? Are they both just Fine? Don’t know. I’m not a Xiuchenist for real, but I do believe in them! So, I find myself thinking about this often.

Jongdae, like Minseok, finds Baekhyun too much to deal with. But he finds Junmyeon funny and gets less stressed out about the fact that Junmyeon won’t let him help than Minseok does. Because Jongdae isn’t the pack leader and he’s younger, he finds it easier to insert himself into Junmyeon’s business and meddle sometimes, without stepping to hard on Junmyeon’s toes.

He is soft with Yixing, and is sad for him, but Jongdae is very strict with himself about things which he cannot change, so he doesn’t let himself dwell on this often.

It took him a few years to understand Chanyeol’s little neuroses but he did eventually, so now he knows how to care for Chanyeol and that satisfies him greatly.

He’s generally very gentle and full of advice and pets for all younger and older pack members.

He has a stroke of sadism in him, but it’s not consuming like Junmyeon’s is, and he’s Normal about it. It’s very to do with sex for him, rather than his personality.

Kyungsoo:

He’s an alpha, and he’s possessive as fuck. He’s also a very sensible person, and has decided very early on that he will not be getting romantically involved with any of his members because they’re all insane and they’ll drive him out of his mind if he wants to go full possessive alpha on them!

He does think Jongin is incredibly hot and is very soft with him. He’s also known to be soft with Sehun, though he’d never admit to it.

He’s a neutral party in the pack, though he has a deep sense of justice and will stand with whoever he thinks is wronged in an argument.

I don’t have many Ksoo thoughts, he gives me a headache, his personality is impenetrable! Sorry 🙈

Jongin:

You might have noticed I’ve not spoken much about him with the other members, and that’s because I firmly believe that, while he is a part of this pack, he’s bonded to Taemin. Taemin is his alpha, and they are each other’s persons. Jongin only spends heats with the pack when Taemin is unavailable.

In the Exo pack, Nini is soft and baby. He lounges over the alphas and scents the other omegas and takes care of them. But he’s also stubborn and strong, and because he’s been mated for such a long time, thinks that all the others and their weird relationship problems are so tiring and silly!

That’s why he gets on with Kyungsoo a lot. Kyungsoo does not have weird relationship problems, because he simply has no messy relationships in the band XD They get to make fun of the others from their little cocoon.

Nini knows how to depend on the others to help him, and he’s very good at being a stabalizing and sensible influence in the pack.

Him and Taemin make each other so much better, and take care of each other’s needs so well that Nini effectively doesn’t need a pack. They just add to his life and he adores them. It makes him a very steady presence.

Sehun:

He effectively takes the role of a pack omega but not because he needs it, because the pack does. It’s good for them to have someone they can spoil and love this way. He gives them the opportunity of all feeling like they get to take care of him and be good for the pack by doing so; and by doing so, he gets to comfort them and take care of them without them feeling like they’re asking for care.

Sehun has large emotions about the pack, he needs all of them, and feels like they all need each other. He’s mostly quiet about it, though, he’s not a words person. He just flops in someone’s lap when he’s having emotions.

As in canon, he’s been in love with Chanyeol for years, but it takes them an insanely long time to work out what they are to each other. This lands Sehun in Junmyeon and Baekhyun’s beds often.

He’s an omega, but not a sub or a dom. Like Chanyeol, he enjoys toying with power dynamics broadcast trust. Though he would melt into the center of the earth if Chanyeol bit him and mated him. And he would die if Chanyeol had a collar on and let himself be ordered around by Sehun. It’s all very deeply unusual and not standard bdsm XD

I feel like I talked about Sehun’s relationships with the other members throughout the answer above, so I won’t repeat them here!

Anyway… wow that was long. Anon, I am so sorry if this is way more than you expected!!! I hope you enjoy it regardless!!!!!!!! I have many thoughts about this, clearly! XD

#cake answers #exo meta #wow that was so fucking long #I have many exo emotions!

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xunqiz · 2 months ago

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★ ○ 🎧⋆｡ °⋆ 🍸 *ੈ♡⸝⸝🪐༘⋆ 🏹

🌯 ★｡°⋆🧋 ◡̈ 🌾 ꒰ 🥞 🫒 ꒱

･ﾟ.࿔:･⏳️=͟͟͞͞♡♣️. ˚ ꩜ ｡🧵📦 ⋆୨୧˚

🥝🥨🍵 ⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ──★ ˙ ̟🏡 !! ⛰️

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kaleidohscopic · 6 months ago

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IN THE DYING SUMMER SUN — BBH

PAIRING: baekhyun x female reader SUMMARY: a weekend up at the beach house might just be enough to make you crack and come clean about your little (big, fat) crush. alternatively, park chanyeol is possibly the worst wingman ever. GENRE: friends to lovers! au, crush! baekhyun, romance, fluff, a pinch of angst, pining, humour WARNINGS: swearing, alcohol consumption, sexual tension!!, slightly suggestive, reader and baekhyun are both kind of clueless tbh WORD COUNT: 9.4k NOTE: happy birthday baekhyun!! thought it would be fitting to start off this blog with a fic for bbh on his birthday. this was supposed to be a 4-5k piece of fluff but somehow it ended up being double that and a lot more serious than i originally intended (oops?). kinda nervy posting such a long fic for the first time ever so feedback is most certainly welcome and i hope you enjoy!

“You definitely rigged this.”

Chanyeol only rewarded you with a shit-eating grin.

The scrap of paper couldn’t weigh more than a few grams, but in your hands, they felt like the barbell plates at the gym that he could never leave alone. Especially since a certain someone was also holding another scrap of paper with ‘ground floor twin room’ hastily scrawled across it.

You shook your head vehemently, fixing the tall boy with a dagger-like stare that he seemed completely unfazed by. “I demand a redraw.”

“Which is not going to happen,” was his gleeful response. “We all agreed — no take-backs before picking.” The hat that you had all drawn out of, now empty, was tossed on the coffee table as everyone else began to move their bags into their freshly chosen rooms. Somewhere down the hallway, Jongin tripped over the wheels of his suitcase, his pained groan and Kyungsoo’s laughter bouncing against the walls of the AirBnb.

“Besides,” Chanyeol continued, hand coming up to ruffle your hair, “if I had actually rigged it, you should be thanking me. I’d be doing you a favour.” He gestured towards Baekhyun, who was busying himself with packing his hoodie back into his duffle bag, hopefully oblivious to the fact that the two of you were conspiring about him less than three metres away.

“Yeah, say it any louder, why don’t you. And no, that wasn’t an invitation,” you warned, catching the wicked glint in Chanyeol’s eyes. He opened his mouth, as if to make good on your request and let the whole house know, only to choke back a groan at the elbow you shoved into his side. Behave, said the glare that you shot at him. His replying smile was anything but reassuring, before he picked up his bag and headed upstairs.

That was what you got for getting a little too drunk at Jongdae’s housewarming get-together last month and accidentally slipping up about your big, fat, debilitating crush on Baekhyun after the third glass of pinot noir in one night. If it had been anyone else made aware of your juvenile secret, you would probably be feeling a little less uneasy — but it just had to be the one person who couldn’t keep his mouth shut to save his life. Not to mention Park Chanyeol was a terrible wingman, having heard about the ridiculous escapades he put Jongdae through before he finally cuffed his girlfriend. Lucky for you, you were now getting to experience it first-hand.

“I can ask Jongin to swap, if you really don’t want to room with me,” came a soft voice from your right. Baekhyun regarded you with an expectant, if somewhat hesitant expression.

“No, it’s okay,” you replied, trying your best to mask the panic that was fighting its way into your voice. It would be just your luck, that he would think your reluctance to share a sleeping space with him was because you didn’t like him enough, and not that you liked him a little too much. The slight furrow in his brow seemed to melt away with your words. “I just wanted the big room with the queen bed, but somehow Chanyeol got it. I seriously think he did something to these,” you said, waving your slip of paper that matched the one he was holding.

Come to think of it, you and Baekhyun had also been the last ones to draw out of the hat, since Chanyeol had insisted on going counter-clockwise around the dining table. How he managed to game the room allocations was beyond you, but you were now almost certain that he did.

“It’s good that he’s by himself though. The snoring would drive anyone mad,” Baekhyun mused, and you had to chuckle in agreement.

“That time he passed out at my place after Saturday drinks…I genuinely thought I’d end up with a murder charge that night.” you said, chest squeezing at the way his eyes crinkled into crescent moons at your words. You busied yourself with your own bag, hoping he wouldn’t see the dumb smile on your face, and be able to tell how pleased you were to have teased a laugh out of him. Laughter was not something he usually withheld — he gave it freely, if not a little too generously — but it always did a funny thing to your heart when you were the cause of it.

“Definitely can’t have that. Pretty face like yours would not last a day in jail.” With one hand around his own duffle, he draped the free one around your shoulders, letting the warmth of his arm wrap around you as you headed down the corridor to the room you’d be sharing for the weekend.

Having a crush on Baekhyun was no big deal. Probably even normal, if his college days were anything to go by. But what made it so debilitating was things like this — the little comments he’d throw around that could easily be passed off as just friendly flirting if you were so inclined, though you sometimes let yourself imagine his intentions came more from the flirting than the friendly part. He was a generally touchy person too, never missing a chance to pat Kyungsoo’s ass when the opportunity arose, but sometimes the brush of his fingers against the inside of your wrist felt a little too affectionate for two people united solely through friendship, even if you were the only one who internally crossed that line a while ago. It was things like this that made you question, every once in a while, if your feelings were as one-sided as you believed. Most of the time though, you chalked it up to his disposition, his easy-going magnetism, and concluded that whatever signals you thought he was sending were merely due to your overactive imagination running wild with hopes that he felt the same way.

“Dibs left,” he said, plopping down on the twin bed closer to the window. His arms raised above his head in a long, yawning stretch, revealing a thin strip of skin at the waistband of his jeans. Just the sight of it was enough to control your blood, sending a rush of it to your face, and you internally cursed yourself for being so weak to such a small thing. It was obvious you had been alone for way too long. He was too comfortable to notice the flush on your cheeks, eyes shut and enjoying the tension leaving his body after the long drive up.

You sat yourself down carefully on the remaining bed, noting the gap between the two mattresses. Whether you wanted to push them together or against opposite walls of the room, you couldn’t be sure. It was hard to form coherent thoughts when he turned to you with a boyish playfulness that curled the corner of his mouth upwards.

“You’re not going to sleepwalk your way into my bed, are you?” he asked, chin in his hand, a teasing glint in his eyes. You tried hard to catch yourself from choking on your own saliva.

“I’ve been known to kick in my sleep,” was your reply, voice much more nonchalant than you thought you were capable of, given that he had just planted the seed of the two of you sharing a twin mattress that was definitely not big enough to lie down on without touching in at least three different places. The glint in his eyes faded immediately, giving way to thinly-veiled concern at the threat underlying your words.

“I was kidding,” you clarified when he sat up and started to back away from you. “At least, I haven’t done that for fifteen or so years. But you never know, it might come back again tonight, when you’ve finally fallen asleep, and then BAM! Foot to the face. You better sleep with your eyes open, Byun Baekhyun,” you warned, giggling at the realisation dawning over his face before his pretty features settled into mock annoyance.

“You just think you’re so funny, don’t you?” He was on all fours now, making his way towards you with a wolfish grin. In no time, he had crawled over the gap between your two beds and suddenly his fingers were prodding at your ribs. It was a well-planned tickle attack, and one you had no chance of escaping from, since his legs had caged you in and the rest of him was pinning you down. You were helpless against the ambush of his fingers, succumbing to them with gasping giggles, punctuated by desperate pleas for him to stop. He showed no intention of letting up, fingers digging even deeper into your waist.

If you were going to die like this, you thought, at least you’d be dying while lying under him.

“When you two are done canoodling, we’re going to go set up on the beach,” came a voice from the doorway. Baekhyun’s merciless fingers paused, and the two of you looked back to see Chanyeol’s amused face at the foot of your bed, smirking like he knew some big secret that neither of you were privy to. God, you were seriously regretting that third glass at Jongdae’s new apartment last month.

Baekhyun turned back to you, your noses almost touching, and you could feel the air from his exhales fanning against the skin of your cheek. There was a mole just above the corner of his mouth that you don’t think you had ever noticed before. Warmth from his jean-clad legs radiated into your hips and meandered up and down your spine, and suddenly the late summer air around you was becoming sticky and heavier than usual.

As if just now noticing the proximity you were in, he slowly untangled himself from your limbs, making sure not to crush you in the process. You sat up, still breathless, having just calmed down enough for full inhales again, but so was he, you noted. Surely tickling wasn’t that exertive of an activity? Or maybe you’d put up a better fight than you had thought.

“Don’t forget your towels,” was the last thing Chanyeol said before he ducked out, yelling at Jongin to grab the beach umbrellas, not the rain ones. There were a few seconds just filled with the sounds of your slowing breathing.

“I’m going to go get changed,” Baekhyun said, turning around to dig through his bag for his swim shorts. You couldn’t see his expression, but you could hear the slight tremble in his voice that indicated he hadn’t quite recovered from whatever was afflicting him. “We’ll probably just be setting up the umbrellas, so no rush, just come down when you’re ready.” As he turned around to head towards the bathroom, he flashed you that familiar smile, the one that always resulted in one of your own to mirror his, and set you at ease again.

“And make sure you bring your sunscreen,” he added, before disappearing down the hallway. You watched him go, throwing yourself back onto the bed with a frustrated groan once you were sure he was out of earshot. Two whole days and nights in this tiny room, in the languid death of summer, with his body just an arm’s length away from yours — you had no idea how much of this you could stomach and emerge with your sanity intact.

This was shaping up to be the longest weekend ever.

The afternoon sun was unforgiving when you emerged from the house. Though you had thrown on a cover up before leaving, you could feel the heat tingling on the surface of your skin through the thin cotton. From the top of the bushy path leading down to the beach, you could already hear the tell-tale signs of a competition brewing between the boys, even if you couldn’t quite see them yet. A few steps down and you could make out their figures, managing to catch the view of Chanyeol flipping backwards off the jetty before plunging into the water, where the rest of them were bobbing around. Baekhyun’s voice floated above the others the way it always did when he was teasing, liltingly distinguishable, though perhaps that was only because you were now so attuned to it that other voices naturally started to sound more foreign.

It was hard to pinpoint exactly when he went from Baekhyun, your friend who tended to get a little too rowdy after half a can of beer, to Baekhyun, your friend who made your heart pick up a little faster when you thought of him. One day his hiccuping laugh was teetering on the edge of obnoxiousness, and then all of a sudden it became endearing to hear the raw joy in his voice. If you knew exactly when the switch flipped, maybe you’d be able to retrace your steps and stop yourself from ever setting off down this path to end up where you were now, watching the sunlight glisten against his wet face with an overwhelming affection, wondering what it would be like to be the private audience of his radiant smile everyday.

You set your things down on the sand next to the pile of clothes and towels that were already there, recognising Chanyeol’s hat somewhere in the mix. The beach umbrella that Jongin had set up was already beginning to lurch towards one side, the brim rather close to the ground. Fixing it back in place and digging it into the sand a little deeper, you let out a fond laugh — some things, like the way Jongin used his hands like they weren’t his own, would stand the test of time.

You had hoped that your friendship with Baekhyun would be one of those things, but the more time you spent casting longing glances his way when he wasn’t looking, the more you weren’t sure if you could ever recover from his rejection if you ever did decide to be honest about your feelings towards him. So you did your best to bury them, content to enjoy his company in the way you were both familiar with, afraid that if they did surface, they’d taint your friendship with something unpleasant and irreversible. If you couldn’t own the sun, at least you could still revel in its warmth.

Satisfied with the position of your towel underneath the shade of the umbrella, you looked back at the water, returning Baekhyun’s sweeping wave with a small one of your own. It was just enough of a distraction for Chanyeol to turn around as well, and Baekhyun seized the opportunity to dunk him, gleefully howling as the taller boy’s head disappeared below the waves. Before Chanyeol could resurface and enact his retaliation, Baekhyun was already making his escape, swimming towards the shore with fearful determination. Chanyeol made to follow, but upon seeing you sitting on the beach with your eyes fixed on Baekhyun’s approaching figure, he thought better of it, turning back around to continue the diving evaluation as Jongin took his turn to leap off the jetty.

With an amused smile, you watched as Baekhyun hurried out of the ocean, wet hair flying in all directions and flicking droplets of seawater across the sand. The water trickled down the planes of his bare torso, and you tried to keep your eyes away from the firmness of his pec, or the flexing movements of his abdominals as he made his way over to you. One thing was for sure — the gym sessions with Chanyeol were paying off.

When he finally reached you, Baekhyun slumped onto your towel, ignoring your protests for him to stay away, and proceeded to soak you in the remaining water that was still clinging to his body. The skin of his stomach was cool against your calf, and he giggled delightfully at your attempts to push him off to avoid getting more water onto your clothes.

“Stop trying to fight it, you’re going to get wet when you go in anyway,” he said, finally rolling off you.

“I wasn’t planning on going in. I’m scared you’ll try to drown me,” you huffed, lightly flicking some sand onto his shoulder with your toe. He turned back around, chin cradled in his left hand, and flashed you a boyish smile.

“I would never do that,” he said, though the glint in his eyes was anything but convincing. “Besides, what are you going to do at the beach if you’re not getting in the water?”

You picked up the book nestled in between your shoes and waved it at him. “Read, of course.” He regarded the worn paperback with amused disbelief, eyebrows slightly raised. It was only when you flipped the book open to the paperclip you’d been using as a bookmark that he realised you were serious, and let out a scoff that was laced with something akin to fondness.

“You are such a cliche. Pretty girl reading at the beach? Unbelievable, seriously,” he said, before wriggling his head into your stomach, relishing in your shocked squeals as your cover up began to dampen again. His mischief had left a few wet patches on the fabric that were beginning to stick to your body in the uncomfortable fashion of late summer. You reached for the hem, pulling it off not without some struggle, and immediately felt the sun kissing against your bare shoulders. Though you were mostly covered by the shade from the umbrella, the last thing you wanted was a blistering sunburn where the straps of your tote bag usually rested, so you grabbed the sunscreen you had so diligently packed and began applying it on the parts of your skin that were exposed.

Baekhyun had gone uncharacteristically quiet. If you had been paying attention to him instead of so attentively rubbing the cream into the underside of your knee, perhaps you would have noticed the way his eyes lingered on you for a little longer than would have been polite. They followed the path your hands took, from the expanse of skin below your neck, across your stomach, and down the length of your legs.

“Do you want me to do your back?” he blurted, his voice a little more strained than usual. He was wearing an odd expression on his face, something you couldn’t quite place, but it was different from the usual playful one you were most well acquainted with. Nevertheless, you agreed, passing him the tube and turning around so your back was facing him.

His fingers were still cold from the water, and you jumped when they first made contact with your skin. He only laughed, squeezing both hands around your shoulders to hold you still before he got back to work again.

The first graze of his hands across your shoulders was tentative. You could feel the heat of him behind your back, the smell of salt and sun clinging to the air around you. His breaths fanned the skin on the back of your neck, sending goosebumps down your arms and legs despite the thick heat of the afternoon. If he noticed, he didn’t say anything. Slowly, his hands made their way down to your lower back, and it was then that you realised you might be in trouble. His hands pressed against the grooves of your spine, curving ever so slightly around your waist, and if you shivered, he pretended not to feel you tremble in his grasp.

It was when his fingers slipped underneath the ties of your bikini top that the alarm bells began to go off in your head. His movements were hesitant, fingers stuttering in their dance across your skin before they gingerly pulled the strings aside to spread the sunscreen between the top and bottom halves of your back. It was too much, feeling his warmth, knowing there was only an inch of space between your bare torsos, having his hands on you doing such a thorough job with the task he had assigned to himself. When the tips of his fingers brushed the side of your ribs, just under the edge of the fabric, you couldn’t help the breathy noise that escaped your lips.

“Actually, I think I left something back at the house,” you said suddenly, words hurriedly running into each other as they tripped over your tongue on the way out of your mouth. Twisting away from his dangerous touch, you bolted to a stand and hoped he’d attribute the pinkness of your cheeks to being outside in the brightness of the afternoon. Your words came out staggered, the slight tremble in your voice betraying the composure you were fighting so hard to maintain.

Baekhyun’s gaze was careful, if not a little confused. The more his eyes ran over you, the more you were sure that the depth of your feelings towards him were beginning to surface on your face. Another second and he’d be able to tell, he’d figure out the little secret you’d been trying to conceal for the last couple of months. And then you wouldn’t be able to deny its existence anymore.

So you fled, tossing a rushed promise to be right back over your shoulder before scurrying up the bushy path again. Away from the scrutiny of his eyes, away from the truth you did not want revealed to the world. The ghost of his touch lingered between your shoulder blades and along the ridges of your spine, your body already committing to memory the caress of his skin against yours. You realised then, that it would not be possible to continue living on as usual, now that you knew the taste of his closeness, as fleeting as it may have been.

“I think you should just go for it.”

Your fingers tightened around the glass at his words. Chanyeol’s tone was light and pragmatic, speaking as if the act of unfurling your heart were nothing more than a decision about whether to have steak or pork belly for dinner.

“Don’t be ridiculous,” you scoffed, bringing the bottle to your lips.

“I’m serious though,” he continued, nudging your arm with the lip of his own beer. “I think you should just tell him, and see what he says. And stop expecting the worst. You’ll never know how things could turn out if you never do anything.”

You let your head fall back to lean on the doorframe you were both standing against, gazing out at the patio that had begun to darken following the sunset. Baekhyun and Jongin were placed at opposite ends of the ping pong table that had been wheeled out of the living room after dinner, neither seeming to mind the soft prick of grass at the underside of their bare feet. Whether the game was proceeding well was difficult to deduce, since both were sporting wide grins and rosy cheeks, courtesy of the glasses in their hands — but judging by the cluster of orange balls around Baekhyun’s feet, you had an inkling that victory would not be his. He didn’t seem to mind yet, laughing gleefully as Jongin swung his racquet too hard and launched a ball over the fence.

“Not everyone is as good as you when it comes to talking about their feelings, you know,” you said, fixing Chanyeol with a knowing look that was halfway between admiration and resentment. If you only had his courage of expression, perhaps you would’ve put an end to your suffering a while ago. Ripped the band-aid off cleanly instead of peeling away at it, day by day, bit by bit, until it was hanging on by the last of its adhesive. You weren’t sure how much longer your resolve could last, if it would even survive this weekend without snapping under the force of your attraction.

He only shrugged. “You can’t get good without actually doing it.” You pondered his words in the short silence that settled while you both took another sip. He was right, of course, you knew that, but it didn’t make hearing it any easier.

“I think… I’m just scared,” you began slowly. Realising you were about to put his advice into action, Chanyeol turned to you with reassuring and patient eyes, waiting. You took a deep breath, swinging the contents of your bottle back and forth, and continued, “I’m scared that if I do tell him, it’s going to change our relationship and then I’ll lose him completely. At least if I don’t say anything, he’s still my friend, and I get to keep being in his life.”

He regarded you for a moment, brows furrowed thoughtfully, as he decided on his next words. It was no easy feat to try on honesty the way you just did, having so carefully avoided it for your entire life, and he was well aware of it. The slight tremble in your hands was a dead giveaway.

“And I think that’s completely understandable,” he finally said. “There’s always going to be a trade-off, no matter what you choose to do. But I guess you have to weigh up which one means more to you, and if you’re willing to take that risk on the chance that it does work out between you two. I’m only telling you what I think you should do. You’re the one who knows your own feelings the best.”

Another silence fell over the two of you again. Your bottle was nearly empty now, the beer inside already lukewarm from being out of the cooler for too long. Jongin let out a cheer as the ball sailed over his head, landing far behind him on the grass and ignoring Baekhyun’s flagrant attempts at contesting the point. Even under the patio lights, he was still so pretty, cheeks pink and glowy, the shape of his mouth so endearing as it settled into a pout. By now, you were used to the longing, and paid it no mind as it filled your chest with a bittersweet warmth.

“Aren’t you two best friends though?” you asked, the thought suddenly occurring to you. “You’re telling me you don’t know anything about how he feels about… whatever is going on?” The look you gave Chanyeol was suspicious, but he stood strong, resisting your prying eyes.

“I wouldn’t be much of a best friend if I went around blabbing to you about his feelings, would I?” was his response, accompanied by an elusive smile. There was something in his words that lingered in your mind, some important detail you felt as if you had overlooked, but his amused expression gave you nothing to hold onto. “You’re both so clueless,” he chuckled after a beat of your thoughtful silence, downing the rest of his drink.

Baekhyun was skipping over now, having officially lost 18-21 to Jongin, who was heartily celebrating his victory with a series of hoots and giggles. He headed straight for you, hair all messed up from running his hands through it during the game, and a rosy flush to his face, though you weren’t sure if that was from the game or the glass that he had left at the ping pong table. When he wrapped his arms around you and buried his head in your shoulder, you knew that it was probably the latter.

“I lost the game,” he whined, petulant and firm against you. His hair tickled your chin, and you could smell the faint scent of his shampoo from his shower after the beach.

“Are you drunk already?” you asked, trying to mask your breathlessness at his proximity with a few giggles. Baekhyun’s affinity for physical contact was the worst — or best, depending on how you looked at it — when he had alcohol in his system, and it didn’t take much to push him past the borders of sobriety. His ache for touch and affection was most often relieved on you, and you always obliged, gladly and readily letting him take whatever it was he wanted.

The tip of his nose brushed back and forth against your skin as he shook his head. “Just a little, tiny bit,” he said, voice muffled, and you felt the warmth of his breath through your t-shirt.

“Where’s the love for your best friend?” Chanyeol teased, the only one amused at the way Baekhyun had dived straight into your arms without even sparing him a glance.

The boy in your arms didn’t even falter, only snuggling further into you. “You know it’s because she’s my favourite,” he murmured, lips skimming your collarbone ever so softly as he spoke. The panic onset was instantaneous, and you prayed he was too drunk to pick up on the sudden rapid thundering of your heartbeat inside your chest. You tried to look at Chanyeol for help, but he was setting off across the patio, taking up Jongin on his invitation for a match with the promise that he would wipe the floor with the younger boy.

Baekhyun only hummed contentedly, oblivious to the havoc he was wreaking inside you, tightening his hold around you when you made a half-hearted attempt to wriggle out of his arms. His pink lips set into another rounded pout, brows slightly creased as he pulled back to look at you.

“You know you’re my favourite, right?” he asked, trying to be convincing despite the slight slur to his words. You could only nod, letting a small smile twist the corners of your mouth upwards. Whether he realised or meant what he was saying, you weren’t all that concerned, simply happy to bask in the warmth of his full attention knowing it was probably just nonsensical babble brought on by the drink in his belly. It was so much easier to be close to him when he was like this, hazier, and sure to forget most of what he had said the morning afterwards. It didn’t hurt that you were also starting to feel a little blurrier around the edges, the beer from earlier making its way through your system and leaving behind a pleasant fuzziness that made it all the more tempting to come clean about your feelings. But you weren’t quite there yet, and you had no plans to get to that point tonight.

Seemingly satisfied with your answer, he curled back up into you. With your hands around his back, you could feel the steady rhythm of his heart, the comfortingly even beat of it through his rib cage. It was so easy to imagine this was the way it had always been, and would always be, so easy to slip into the fairytale you often found yourself fabricating when your one-sided longing became too much to contain. It would be so nice if you could live in this moment forever, you thought. But was this small pocket of peace worth risking your entire friendship?

“I wish you’d stop running away from me,” he murmured, or at least that’s what you thought he said. It was a little difficult to concentrate when his lips were grazing your skin again, lightly feathering across your neck as the words shaped his mouth on their way out of it.

And then you felt it, the unmistakable and deliberate press of his lips against your collarbone, the gentle pressure and the slight moisture on your skin from it searing through you like a lit trail of gasoline. This time, he had to have heard the stilted gasp that escaped your mouth.

He lifted his head slowly to look at you again, searching your face with glassy eyes — for what, you weren’t quite sure. The only things you were sure of right now were the fiery burn in your cheeks, and the deafening pounding of your heart that echoed between your ears.

“Sorry, I shouldn’t have done that,” he said, though his expression was nowhere near as apologetic as his words would have you believe. If anything, his gaze on you was almost daring, waiting to see how you’d respond, if you’d shrink back into yourself like you always did when he got too close and crossed that invisible boundary you only danced around. If you’d run away from him the way he had just said he wished you wouldn’t. Or if you’d let him push you over too, just this once.

Seeing the hesitation in your face, he slowly extricated from you, retracting his limbs and warmth until they hung limply by his sides again. Scratched the back of his head. Let his eyes wander around the patio and settle on anything except for you.

“I’m going to see if Kyungsoo needs any help with cleaning up,” he said quietly, not waiting for your response as he headed back into the house. The drink had made his gait unsteady, and you felt him sway against the doorframe as he brushed past you. A chilling unease began to settle in the pit of your stomach as you watched him go, the shape of his back getting smaller and smaller as he was swallowed by the light of the living room.

Try as you might, you couldn’t shake the feeling that something had shifted, and that there was a possibility it had not been in the direction you had hoped for.

Perhaps the second glass of wine had been a little overambitious, you realised, staring up at the ceiling of your shared bedroom. Kyungsoo had been so excited about the 2012 Shiraz he had brought from home, pouring you a full glass with an enthusiasm he didn’t often display. You couldn’t say no, and you didn’t protest when he refilled it a short while later. If he noticed the faster-than-usual speed with which you drained its contents, he did not show it. Whilst alcohol tended to put people to sleep, it had the opposite effect on you, dangling sleep in front of you like a carrot you could never get a hold of easily, or for long. That second glass of wine was the reason you were lying in bed, not soundly asleep like you wished, but keenly aware of every breath and every movement from the other occupant of the room, only an arm’s length away from you.

Baekhyun had spent most of the night with Chanyeol out on the patio, drinking and laughing under the generous light of the moon. Even if he wasn’t purposely avoiding you, you felt his absence from your side sorely. He didn’t say much during the wind down for bed either, only asking if you wanted the curtains fully shut, to which you gave an affirmative. Still, a sliver of moonlight speared through the gap between them, illuminating the room just enough that if you turned your head to the side, you could make out the outline of his body beneath the covers and acquaint yourself with the familiar curve of his nose.

It was only fair that the wine, having taken your sleep, offered something in return to mark an honourable trade. That something manifested itself in the restlessness of your mouth, which battled against the remaining rationality of your mind. Loose-lipped and anxious, you dug your nails into the palm of your hand, willing the war inside your head to approach a ceasefire. You did not want to make a fool of yourself in the intimacy of this small room.

However, your resolve could not last for long, corroded by the hours spent without his presence, without the familiar warmth of his touch, without his little comments meant only for you as he pointed out something silly or poked fun at Jongin’s whining. Barely above a whisper, you called out his name, letting your voice permeate the darkness. It was loud enough that he’d hear it above the silence, but soft enough that he could ignore it if he so wished, and you’d attribute his ignorance to the deepness of sleep.

There was a second of silence, which he followed with an answering hum and a shuffle of his legs on the mattress. He was awake, and he was waiting for you to speak.

“Are you mad at me?” you asked the ceiling.

“No, I’m not mad at you,” was his reply, accompanied by a quiet sigh. He was conversing with the ceiling too, just as reluctant to face you.

Your hands twisted the sheets in dissatisfaction. The even tone of his voice indicated truth, but his answer didn’t explain why he had spent the whole night outside without calling for you even once, when he usually couldn’t last half an hour without pressing into your side and tickling your shoulder to grab your attention.

“Then what?” you probed, cringing at the whiny edge to your voice.

He was quiet for a while, letting your words hang in the air, that for a moment you thought he wouldn’t speak, that your brief conversation had already come to an end, and you’d be left with unanswered questions as bedside companions for the night. There was another rustling from his side of the room as he settled himself under the covers.

“Sometimes, I think I want too much from you,” he finally said. He was quiet, but you heard every word with the clarity as if they had been projected through a stereo system. “And you can’t give me everything I want, but that’s not your fault. It’s an indication of my own greed and selfishness more than anything else.”

You kicked around at your sheets to signal your unrest at his words. “I don’t think you are greedy or selfish. At all. At least not with me.” If anything, you were the selfish one, wanting all his smiles and touches for yourself, wanting the entire spectrum of his existence to only ever be shown to you. Your generosity only ever came to light when it was in service of him, gladly letting him take your attention, your time, allocating space in your mind for him and him only.

Baekhyun only laughed a soft and short laugh at your reply, the sound so different from the usual one filled with boisterous joy that you had grown the most used to. You heard him turn over in his bed to face you. In the quiet darkness of the room, the focus of his gaze flooded over you, and the intensity of it was so blinding you didn’t dare to look away from the smoothness of the ceiling, fearing you’d smoulder into ash the moment you locked eyes with him.

“You know that you are a really important person to me. You know that, right?” he asked, eyes searing into you with the force of a thousand suns. “I mean, everyone else is also important because they’re my friends, but you’re different — you are a special person to me. I don’t see you the way I see Chanyeol, or Jongin, or anyone else.”

His words were still tinged with the slight slur of the beer from out on the patio, but you could feel the delicate care with which they were chosen and spoken. Something was different about tonight. You could taste it in the thick air between the two of you, feel it in the wire-taut tension stretching across the gap between your two twin beds. Your fingers dug into the comforter, willing the turbulence in your chest to subside.

He paused and took a deep breath, as if bracing himself against something devastating. “I don’t want the same things with them as I do with you.”

You held your breath until you felt the pain of deprivation in your chest.

“But I’ve made peace with the fact that what I want from you, and the way I feel about you, are things I’ll have to carry with me. They’re things I have to bear the weight of alone. I don’t — I would never want you to be uncomfortable, or see me differently.” There was a slight catch in his voice at the end.

You didn’t even know if your lungs were still working while you listened to him speak. There was a surrealness to the night, as if everything had been covered in a blanket of haze and everything that was transpiring was the product of a fever-induced dream, existing on an alternate timeline.

Baekhyun… it didn’t even feel right thinking it.

Baekhyun had feelings for you? And he had convinced himself it was one-sided?

“It’s pretty selfish, isn’t it? Asking you to act like things between us won’t change after everything I just said,” he laughed, but there was little humour in the sound. You finally turned your head to look at him, the wry curve of his mouth catching the moonlight as he gazed at you. He was smiling, the shape of it meant to comfort you, but he could not hide the sadness weaved into the downturn of his eyes. He had always been braver than you, perhaps not in the aspect of riding roller-coasters, but certainly in his ability to be honest and open about his emotions, regardless of whether they were good or bad.

It was your turn to be brave now, and shed your own fear to meet him where he stood.

“I’ve been seeing you differently for a while now,” you admitted, turning under the sheets to fully face him. You were grateful for the darkness, hoping that it would conceal the heat creeping up your neck and face, painting your cheeks with a hot blush that accompanied the start of your confession. His brows furrowed slightly as he tried to process your words, confusion settling in the crease between them. You held yourself back from reaching out to smooth them over.

“What do you mean?”

“What makes you think you’re the only one who feels this way?” you asked instead, leaving his question unanswered. There was a tremble in your voice as you spoke, and you were sure he heard it above the quiet of your bedroom. It was the closest you could get to telling him without actually telling him about the silent battle that had been raging in your head for the last few months.

This was it, you thought. He had to know now.

“Am I not?”

The weight of his stare pressed against you, drawing you to him with the tangible pull of gravity. The eyes that roamed your face had replaced their previous confusion with questioning, and a glimmer of something akin to hope. He had never looked more beautiful and devastating than he did right now. You felt the light of dawn breaking over your skin, a promise of something new and good sure to follow. Its warmth simmered within you, staving off the chill of the late summer night with a heat that had you pushing off your covers in a hurried frenzy and rising to sit on the edge of your bed, toes just grazing the floorboards beneath you. Would you still have had the same nerve to face him in the daylight, rough and exposed without the lulling comfort of darkness? Would he still look at you, unpolished and flawed in the clarity of the sun, the same way, with the reverence of man at the sight of an angel?

Baekhyun mirrored you and sat up on his own bed, slowly, as if not wanting to spook you, fearing you’d run off and retreat back into the confined familiarity of your own head. His knees knocked against yours in the small space between your two mattresses. You jolted at the feeling of his skin on yours, having gone without it for so long that the mere touch was like the first drop of water after emerging from the desert. He made to move away, trying to shuffle across the length of the bed, but stilled at the hand you placed just over his knee, willing him to stay put. Surely, he could feel the beat of your heart thrumming through your fingertips.

It was your turn to be brave now.

Fueled by the second glass of Shiraz and the muted encouragement of darkness, before you could second guess yourself and overthink every possible negative outcome of what you were about to do, you closed your eyes and leant towards him. Slowly, inch by inch, until your journey ended with the soft, tentative press of your lips against his. It was short and chaste, nothing more than a gentle pressure, and you pulled back when you felt his lips part in surprise.

“Does that answer your question?” you whispered, heart in your throat.

There it was. You had gone and done it.

His eyes were closed, and in the dim moonlight peeking through the curtain, you could almost make out each of his eyelashes, fluttering dark and soft against the smooth skin of his cheek. For a few seconds, the room was filled only with the sounds of your breathing as you waited for his reaction, for the consequences of your actions and what that meant for your friendship with him.

Then you heard it — his soft laugh, coloured with appreciative disbelief, and felt the air of it caress your face. The corners of his mouth curved upwards into a small, pleased smile. His eyes blinked open slowly, taking you in with a hunger that had desire curling in the pit of your stomach.

“You are just so…” he began, but you never found out just exactly what you were. He was already pulling you back into him, slotting his mouth against yours like they were always made to fit perfectly together. This time, the kiss was anything but chaste, the sheer force of it enough to scorch your insides down to your bones. His arm wrapped around your waist, pulling you flush towards him, and your knees parted around his thighs to adjust to the new position. Your own hands found purchase in the softness of the hair at the nape of his neck, desperate for something to anchor yourself to, in fear that the realisation of this moment would somehow make it slip away.

This was what it felt like to stand unafraid and bare in the light of unbridled wanting, to consume and be consumed by a ravenous appetite with no propensity for satiety. When his hands slipped past the hem of your sleep tank, fingertips grazing across the skin of your lower back, you were sure you could erupt into flames. He swallowed the breathy noise that escaped your lips, tongue brushing against yours as he claimed your mouth with his own.

This was what it felt like to hold the sun in the palm of your hand.

When you broke apart to catch your breaths, his eyes were bright, lips plump and swollen, chest heaving beneath your hands. Somehow, you had ended up back on his bed, his head against the pillows, hands under your shirt and keeping you close to him with an unforgiving hold. He was gazing up at you with a devotion that made your heart swell even more than it did pulling oxygen back into your lungs.

“I’ve wanted to do that for a really long time,” he admitted, hiding his head into the crook of your shoulder. You felt his abashed smile against your skin and wondered how it could be possible that you had contained all of this, the longing, the yearning, inside you for so long.

“How long?” you asked, hearing the smile in your own voice.

“Since Chanyeol’s birthday, when you wore that brown sweater with the little bow on the back.”

Last year, Chanyeol had gotten everyone together at his place for a nice dinner and wine followed by a binge watch of all the Iron Man movies in one sitting. It was all going according to plan until a quarter of the way into the third one, when he began snoring at his own birthday gathering. The bowl of popcorn was sliding out of his hands and sure to make a buttery mess all over the rug, and that’s when the rest of you decided to turn the television off and call it a night. Sehun and Jongin tasked themselves with getting the birthday boy into bed, and likely collapsed onto it with him immediately after, while Baekhyun had offered you the couch, assuring you he’d be fine with the blankets on the floor. At the time, you hadn’t thought much of it. As chaotic as he could be, Baekhyun was nothing if not kind, and you had been grateful that his kindness had always extended to you over the three years you had known each other.

“But that was more than half a year ago. Why didn’t you say something sooner?”

His fingers prodded into your sides, eliciting a few choked giggles from you. “I didn’t know how you’d react. You know you’re not the most expressive person on the planet,” he said dryly. “Or the most observant. I literally frenched your collarbone and you’re telling me you didn’t realise I liked you more than as a friend?”

“Okay, well when you put it like that,” you huffed, feeling the vibrations of his laugh through his chest. “But you really didn’t know I had feelings for you? Chanyeol never said anything?”

His movements stilled, leaning back into the pillows so he could lock eyes with you again. “You talk to Chanyeol about me?” he asked, to which you nodded sheepishly. “Since when?”

“Last month, Jongdae’s housewarming. He fished it out of me after dinner,” you sighed, picturing his smug grin under the lights of Jongdae’s fancy new kitchen when you realised that you had slipped up and let him in on your little secret.

“But I talk to him about you.”

You looked at each other for another beat, realisation breaking over the both of you, before dissolving into another fit of disbelieving giggles. Maybe Park Chanyeol did know how to keep his mouth shut after all.

“So he’s a terrible wingman, is what I’m getting out of this whole thing,” Baekhyun chuckled, rolling you over so you were now lying on your side, face to face with him. He planted a slow, sweet kiss on your lips, taking his time to acquaint himself with the shape and taste of your mouth, and you felt the contentment of his smile against you. “I can’t believe we could have gotten together a month ago. Some best friend he is.”

“Gotten together?” you echoed, one eyebrow raised in feigned dispute, delighting in the way his sweet mouth settled into the pout that you adored.

“You mean to tell me that you don’t want to be with me after your tongue was all up in my mouth?”

You pushed his face away, groaning, “Gross, don’t say it like that.” He, however, had different plans, hooking a calf behind your knees and tugging you back into him, before weaving the other leg in between your own.

“You know you like it,” he murmured into your neck, squeezing his arms around you just in case you’d disappear if he didn’t hold on tight enough. One hand traced absent-minded circles over the grooves of your spine as he breathed you in, warm and familiar against your chest.

Yes, you thought, you’d risk any and everything for this exact moment. It was worth all the doubt and heartache, all the time spent replaying those moments in your head, unsure of the meaning behind his actions. You could be sure of it now.

“I do,” you agreed, threading your fingers through the softness of his hair. “I probably more than like you,” you added, tilting his face upwards to steal another kiss, giddy and chest swelling with affection. Perhaps you weren’t quite yet ready for that other four letter word, but you had no doubt you would be one day, and soon. He was all too willing to comply, letting his mouth mould against yours with the poise and patience of a saint.

“I probably more than like you too,” he replied, punctuating his confession with one final kiss to the tip of your nose. It was enough for the serene smile on your face to persist, even past the arrival of sleep.

“I knew it.”

You cracked one eye open, trying to adjust to the light flooding in through the open door to your room. Chanyeol stood at the foot of your bed, grinning from ear to ear with what could only be described as a look of triumph as he took in the scene before him. The boy next to you stirred lightly, digging his face deeper into the pillow, reluctant to leave the realm of the sleeping. Chanyeol was not in the least sympathetic to his friend’s struggles, striding over to the window and pulling back the curtains with a clang. You winced as the full force of the morning sun barged in, and Baekhyun let out a soft noise of displeasure at the intrusion.

“I fucking knew it,” Chanyeol said again, quickly bringing you to your senses as you registered the weight of another body on top of your own. You made to remove yourself from him, fighting the flush creeping up your neck and face, but it was an effort which proved futile as he only tightened the arm around your waist, loath to let you go.

“Can you be quiet? You’re going to wake the whole house,” you hushed, finally succeeding in untangling your legs from Baekhyun’s, feeling the loss of his warmth immediately.

“They’re already up. I came to call you for breakfast,” Chanyeol replied, the grin seemingly stuck to his face. “Which actually reminds me,” he began, before sticking his head out of the doorway to holler, “You better pay up, Jongin. And you too, Kyungsoo!”

“You bet on us?” came the groggy voice from the pillows behind you.

“What the hell, Chanyeol? I thought you said you didn’t go around blabbing about his feelings!” you exclaimed, indignant.

“To you. I never said anything about telling anyone else,” was his reply, smug and victorious at having outsmarted you.

Kyungsoo appeared in the doorway, donning a flour-covered apron, as if to confirm for himself that he was in fact a debtor to the taller boy. “Even if he didn’t say anything, it wasn’t all that hard to figure out,” he said lightly, surveying the room with curiosity and paying no mind to the shock painted on your face. How had everybody known about your now not-so-secret crush on Baekhyun except for the man himself? “Anyways, I only said that it would be unlikely to happen over this weekend, not that it was impossible. So Jongin is the only loser. Now come for pancakes.” And with that, he headed back towards his bowl of batter on the kitchen counter, chuckling at the sound of Jongin’s complaints against fulfilling his end of the wager.

Baekhyun, having somewhat freed himself from the clutches of sleep, rose to a sitting position and shot a drowsy scowl at his friend. “You’re kind of an asshole, you know that right?”

But even the expletive could not put a damper on Chanyeol’s mood, his smile never slipping. “You two should honestly be thanking me,” he said, to which you also shot him a glare. “Also, I’m happy for you and everything, but can you please keep the PDA to a minimum in front of the rest of us? I will lock you out of the house if you don’t.”

Baekhyun turned to you, the creases of the frown on his face slowly but surely smoothing out as he took you in, cheeks puffy and hair a mess from having just woken up. He had seen you in worse states, and definitely in better states, but none of that seemed to matter as he regarded you with nothing but fondness in his eyes. You were sure that your expression mirrored his, affection spreading throughout your entire body, reaching even the tips of your fingers and toes, at the sight of his tousled bed head, the sleepy droop of his eyes, the sweet pinkness of his lips.

The sun was yours. There was no feasible way to stop the smile from blooming across your entire face.

“No promises.”

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