#channiebbang

[channiebbang]

[14:15]

his hand softly pushed the hair strand behind her ear as she sat in front of him, enthusiastically babbling about her day. a blissful smile adorned his lips as he watcher her widened eyes and wide smile.

her eyes followed his hand movement as he caressed her hair, she looked back at his eyes and smiled brightly as he cupped the side of her neck, thumb running along her cheek. she leaned into his touch and a giggle left his lips.

"what?" she snickered, neck feeling ticklish as he rubbed the back of her neck, he chuckled.

"you're so pretty," he mumbled, and she snorted.

"you're one to talk, gorgeous," she scrunched her nose as she gushed about his other worldly looks. chan's ears lit up in a bright red flame as soon as he heard her words. he mocked after her before taking a hold of her hand and tugging softly.

y/n chuckled in delight as she got up on her knees and got closer to chan. he grasped her waist as she sat straddling his thighs.

"stop saying that," he muttered, lips pressed to suppress the shy smile trying to break free. y/n smile before grasping his face in her hands and softly rubbing her nose with his.

"never," she muttered, eyes staring at his as she uttered, "you deserve to know, and i need to tell you."

chan's own hands grasped her face as he couldn't help but smile at her words, neck and ears aflame. he hummed as he deeply stared in her eyes. a slow but obvious blush creeped up y/n's neck, his intense gaze making her feel timid.

as he noticed, one of his eyebrows pulled up in mock and y/n rolled her eyes before pressing her lips to his cheek adoringly.

"shut up," she muttered against his cheek, chan giggling.

"i didn't say anything," he smarted.

"i know you thought about saying it," she countered as he pulled his head back to look up at her, and he nodded, a bashful smile on his lips.

"guilty," he smiled.

she took a hold of his hands as she brought them in the middle, chan leaned back on the pillows, eyes never leaving her. this time focused on their hands as she intertwined their fingers together. her eyes followed his hands as he moved them side to smile, before she looked up at him and smiled.

"i love your hands," she squeezed his hands in hers, and chan couldn't help the soft look in his eyes as he looked at her.

"you say that about everything," he muttered, slowly moving their hands side to side. y/n looked up from their hands to his face. her eyes running along his eyes, lips, nose, the soft curve of his cheeks.

"about everything about you, yes," she smiled when he looked up at her and chan almost lost his breath at how sincere she looked. so he couldn't stop himself from sitting up and wrapping his arms around her waist, pulling her snug against his chest.

she giggled as she cupped his neck, nose brushing against his in affection. his eyes sparkled as his dimples sat deep in his cheeks.

"you're going to make my heart burst if you keep looking at me like that," he muttered, and y/n scrunched her nose.

"now you know how i feel when you look at me like that," she stuck her tongue out at him at the end.

chan snorted before slowly closing the space between them. his lips pressed to hers in a lazy soft kiss, their lips just resting against each other's.

y/n pulled away for a second only to peck chan's lips repeatedly with small kisses that had his lips pull up in a smile as he returned every one of them.

chan parted his lips and pushed them up against hers in a deeper kiss as his hands grasped her waist firmly, y/n's hands cupped his cheeks as she welcomed his plush lips against hers.

they parted as they rested their foreheads against each other, eyes closed.

"you make me content," chan breathed, and y/n's eyes opened as she looked at him confused.

"content?" she asked, encircling one arm around his shoulders while her fingers ran along his hair. chan took a deep breath in as he relaxed in her arms, head resting against her chest.

"hmm," he mumbled, "content. i feel peaceful with you, like i can let go of everything and relax," he explained and y/n smiled softly as she rested her chin on his head.

"well, then you make me content as well," she whispered.

[sly-merlin]

Writings by “Doeilovr”and “ kkaebsongtypo“ and “channiebbang” are really good

Ohooo..I'll go and raid their blogs then!!

THANK YOU SO MUCH. HAVE A NICE DAY🎉🎉

[channiebbang]

a little something while i write the renjun thingy hehe 💚

[22:35]

her breath trembled, you could see it in the cold night. her eyes shone with unshed tears as she looked at chenle, her lips parted and downturned in disbelief.

"t-tell me it's a lie," she muttered as she slowly pulled away from his side.

chenle desperately gripped his hair in a tight fist, not caring that most of his friends were circled around them. all of them wide eyed. some had pity for the girl while some had panic for their friend.

"fucking hell," chenle cursed under his breath as he took a step forward, only for y/n to step away shaking her head.

"chenle, please," she whispered, the first few tears dropping. her voice dripped with despair. desperate for the boy she loved to deny everything.

"sunshine, listen to me," he gripped her upper arms. taeyeong and jaehyun taking a step forward in alarm before stopping. chenle's eyes stung slowly.

he had this heavy weight on his chest, this anger directed at himself for being so stupid. this was all his fault, it was all his fault.

"chenle," she sobbed, not caring about the eyes trained on her, she just needed him to tell her. tell her it was all a misunderstanding. it was all incorrect. he cared about her.

just then her eyes shifted around her seeming to just come into realization that everyone was staring at them. as she watched their pitiful looks her blood ran cold at the harsh truth.

she pushed his arms away from her, stumbling back. chenle looked as realization dawned upon her and her brows furrowed. a pout took over her features as betrayal swam in her eyes.

"they all knew," it wasn't a question, "they all know," she repeated. a choked sound came out of her lips as she pushed the back of her hand to them.

"what the hell is wrong with you?" she asked, her voice filled with anger and hurt. anger she had let herself fall for it, hurt he had done this to her.

"sunshine, baby, i-i never wanted it to get this far," chenle tried to explain, his voice quivering. y/n scoffed, tears freely falling.

"they all knew. this whole time they all knew," she felt empty, completely empty. she felt like a joke, like she was the laughing stock. so she lazily chuckled. and chenle didn't know what was more frightening; her betrayed expression or the chillingly cold chuckle.

"i probably looked like a fucking clown to everyone all these months, huh?" she looked at the floor as her fists squeezed hard, nails digging in her palm, "why would you do this to me?" a choked sob left her lips as her chest shook.

"i feel so embarassed, chenle," she hiccuped, "do you know how it feels? they all knew this whole time. and while i thought i was surrounded by friends and love, it was actually all a lie, all of it," she angrily wiped at her cheeks as she looked up at him. chenle shook his head as he took a step towards her.

"please don't," she whispered, and he stopped. her eyes shifted all around her.

their eyes looked away as soon as they crossed hers, a guilty look in everyone's faces.

the pain she could feel in her chest was so heavy, so big she didn't know how anyone could feel so much of it. she felt so sad, so empty and she never had felt this empty before.

everyone, everyone she thought was her friend was not. everyone she had built a memory with turned out to be fake, all of it was fake. everyone was acting, none of them actually wanted to be friends with her or cared about her.

"y/n please, I'm so sorry, please," chenle's voice trembled as he tried again to talk to her.

"i want to know only one thing," she turned back to him and he nodded right away. ready to confess his love for the girl he fucked over. ready to tell her he had fallen for her charms, for her laugh, for the way she would throw her hair back when she laughed, for the way she cared so much about him and his friends, for the way she ran her fingers through his hair when he laid on her lap. he was ready to say it all.

"none of what i found out was a lie, was it?" that. that was the only thing he didn't want to answer, that was the only thing he wasn't ready to admit. because as much as he wanted to lie and say that no, everything she found out was wrong, he couldn't. that would be another lie.

so as he watched her walk past him as she caressed his cheek and left he couldn't help but hate himself. for he had lost the only person he thought he could have been himself with. and it was all his fault.

[channiebbang]

touch

synopsis: in which jinyoung keeps his distance from his girlfriend because he doesn’t want to hurt her. spoiler alert: he hurts her.

characters: Jinyoung, Jaebeom, Youngjae, Mark, Jackson, Bambam, Yugyeom, Main Character

pairing: universitystudent!Jinyoung x classmate!maincharacter

genre: fluff, angst

word count: 3k

warnings: none

author’s note: I wrote this around march 2020 and posted it on wattpad. It’s not my best work but it’s one of the few I actually like, so I hope you will enjoy reading 😊

When Jinyoung asked y/n out she was the happiest, to say the least. She had went home and screamed like a high school girl going on a first date.

That was the effect Park Jinyoung had on people, he was the epitome of kindness, handsomeness and chivalry. It was shocking to know this kind of gentlemen still existed, and he just happened to ask y/n out.

Their first date was cute and just right. He picked her up from her house and they went to a little caffee shop that just opened, had some dessert and went on a walk along Han river. They talked and talked, sure a couple of awkward silences happened here and there but both of them tried to always make conversation and learn about each other as much as possible.

Y/n was grateful when, after dropping her home, Jinyoung was considered enough not to lean in to kiss her lips or cheeks. She wanted to take things slow.

Sure, she liked Jinyoung but she wasn't comfortable enough with him yet to start skinship right away. I mean, the two barely talked before the day he asked her out, having exchanged words with each other only when asking for notes or when they had projects.

They had been dating for quiet some time when Y/n noticed something. Something that would catch her eye every time they would meet afterwards.

Jinyoung never showed physical affection.

See at first she thought he just was taking his sweet time, so she waited, after all, she needed her own time too. She wasn't in a hurry, anyway.

As time went on and she started hanging out with him and his friends more, she suddenly noticed how, although Jinyoung was always as sweet as honey when he talked to her and looked at her, he never made an attempt in anyway. She thought he didn't want her to be uncomfortable with unwanted touches, after all, he was always attentive with his surroundings.

They had been dating for a little over a year when she noticed.

It was days after the new year had started, they all had been invited to Jaebeom's birthday gathering. Jinyoung picked her up from her house that evening, and drove to the older's house, soft music playing in the background of his car.

His eyes shifted to his girlfriend in the passenger's seat for less than a second. She was scrolling through her Instagram, her hair fallen over her face, the black coat around her shoulders covering her knee length, evening dress. Jinyoung smiled.

"Hey," he called the girl, turning the steering wheel, his eyes back on the road. He waited for her to lock her phone and hum at him.

"You're beautiful, as usual," he muttered, concentrating on the road, unaware of the effect his words had on his girl. Y/n's cheeks were dusted a deep pink. Jinyoung always used to compliment her when she was doing the most random things. He said he didn't do it on purpose, she didn't believe him.

"Thank you," she said after clearing her throat. Her eyes shifted to his neatly styled hair and formal but casual outfit.

"You're very pretty, too," she complimented. Jinyoung looked at her for a second, a playful grin on his lips.

"Pretty?" He asked chuckling deeply, Y/n nodded laughing quietly.

"Yes, I think so. Very pretty," she confirmed, Jinyoung nodded his head murmuring a "okay, fair enough". He parked the car in Jaebeom's garage, before getting out and rounding the car, opening the door for Y/n. She flashed him a thankful smile and he nodded, leading her inside his friend's house.

Jaebeom's place looked just like always, cozy and familiar. Y/n walked in and took off her heels, slipping on a pair of slippers and hanging her coat in the small closet just by the entrance. Having done so many times before.

They heard footsteps before they saw Bambam peek over the corner that led into the living room. He smiled at the couple.

"Guys y/n noona is here! Oh and Jinyoung-hyung," he called out before he came out of the corner and opened his arms engulfing the laughing girl in a big hug. Jinyoung scoffed loudly, before loudly slapping Bambam's arm and walking in the living room, greeting his other friends and the birthday boy.

Y/n made her way in arm in arm with Bambam, the two engrossed in a conversation about Bambam's new video he sent her right after filming and editing it.

She went around the room saying hello to the other boys before giving a side hug to Jaebeom and wishing a happy birthday.

Jaebeom insisted they had dinner right away because he was starving and the food was really good, when Yugyeom whined that it was still too early, Jaebeom snapped back that it was his birthday and so whatever he said would be the end of discussion.

They had just finished dinner and each grabbed a small glass of chocolate mousse before moving back in the living room. Y/n and Youngjae being the last ones to leave the dining area.

She walked to Jinyoung's side seeing as the seat beside him, was empty, the other side occupied by Mark. She mocked Youngjae when he teased her and in response the guy pushed her lightly, laughing out loud. Y/n lost her balance right when she was lowering herself to the seat, resulting in having her arm pushed slightly against Jinyoung's. She didn't think too much of it and just laughed at Youngjae when she saw his worried expression.

She did however take into notice how Jinyoung turned to her with an irritated expression, pausing his conversation with Mark, only to widen his eyes when he realized it was Y/n. She smiled at him, apologizing and going to pull back, when Jinyoung quickly shifted away from her, as if he got burnt. She took his awkward smile into notice and she had to admit, it did hurt just a little bit. She smiled like she didn't notice and turned back to Youngjae, reassuring him that she was okay.

That was the first time she noticed his reluctance when she was too close. She didn't know why he felt that way and she didn't know how to bring it up to him. So she didn't. She thought it would be okay.

She noticed after that whenever they met and hung out, she noticed how every time she would unintentionally brush her elbow against his arm he would shift away, or pull his arm back. She would notice how when they had to walk in a place too crowded he would awkwardly tuck his hands inside his pockets and make sure he was at least a couple of feet apart from her.

One day she had been hanging out with him at his apartment when she got a notification that her mid term results were up. While she waited for Jinyoung to finish cooking she decided to check her marks. She had been super worried about not doing well and if you asked Jinyoung he would say she totally didn't whine his ear off.

She squealed when she saw that she didn't do well but way too well, she got up from the couch and ran to the kitchen, excited to tell Jinyoung.

"Jinyoung! Jinyoung!"she called as soon as she reached the kitchen, the boy hummed while turning towards her, she shoved her phone in his face grinning like a mad woman. The boy smiled seeing her this excited and checked what she was showing, a wide grin made its wat to his face and he looked over at her.

Y/n on the other hand tossed her phone on the counter and squealing jumped on Jinyoung, wrapping her arms around his neck. With eyes wide and a shocked expression, his hands automatically rested on her sides. The girl pulled back, grabbing his shoulders and started jumping.

"I freaking did it! I was so worried and for nothing! I'm sorry, for talking your ear of! Ahhh I'm so happy," she rambled on, not noticing the panicked expression on Jinyoung's face. She went to wrap her arms around him again when he scrambled back hitting his hip against the counter.

Y/n stopped abruptly. Her smile slowly leaving her lips when she finally saw the look in her boyfriend's face and she realized what she had done. An embarrassed expression replaced her previous proud smile. A blush tinting her cheeks. The air was awkward to say the least. Y/n looked at Jinyoung again, their eyes meeting. She gave him a tight lipped smile before grabbing her phone and walking out of the kitchen and to the living room. Jinyoung opened his mouth to say something, anything, to stop the girl but nothing came out. He just stood in the kitchen, and regretted it as soon as he heard the front door opening and closing.

-

"You're so stupid, hyung," Bambam scoffed, leaning on the kitchen counter, looking at the older pacing in front of him.

Said older stopped his walking and turned sharply towards the younger.

"I called you to help me out not to point out the obvious, you dipshit," he retorted watching the younger mock him.

"At least you know," he murmured before screaming as he barely dodged a slipper aimed at his face.

"Don't forget you asked me to come here, I can leave right now, without giving you any advice," the twig pointed a finger at the older. Jinyoung shook his head quickly and raised his hands apologizing.

"Won't happen again, just help me," the older pleaded. Bambam chuckled. This is so fun. He thought.

"Wait, why would you even dodge her every time she tries to touch you?" He asked furrowing his eyebrows. He watched as Jinyoung slightly coughed. He scratched the back of his neck.

"She said something about her ex-boyfriend making her uncomfortable with touching her all the time," the older cleared out, a displeased expression on his face. Bambam nodded, before tilting his head to the side and thinking.

"So...she didn't like being touched by her ex-boyfriend? Like at all? Not even to hold hands?" He inquired genuinely interested. Jinyoung shook his head.

"No, more like inappropriate touches. He was always inappropriately touching her, and if he was not he would make sure it would turn inappropriate. She got really uncomfortable with that after a while," the older explained, Bambam nodded listening carefully.

"Well, have you touched her that way? Did she say that before or after you touched her anyway?" He asked taking an apple from the fruit basket, washing it and taking a bite from it. When he didn't get any answer he turned back to look at his hyung only to see him blushing madly.

"What's up with your face?" The younger gaped at him, never having seen him like this. He was scared.

"What's up with yours, shitface?" And he was back. Bambam let out an obvious breath, relieved.

"We-I-I never touched her in anyway, she told me I think after I asked her about her past relationships on our third date," the older blushed again. Bambam started coughing badly at the words he was hearing. Jinyoung frowned looking displeased at the younger. Bambam gestured for him to give him something to drink while coughing.

"You're so annoying," the older muttered passing him a glass of water that the younger gulped down quickly.

"Well, sorry for choking at your stupidity," Bambam sassed back. Jinyoungs eye shifted to the knives placed blade down in the wooden container. Bambam noticed.

"I'm only joking, no need to go behind bars," he quickly added. Jinyoung smiled tightly before switching back to a serious face.

"But like, with no touching, do you mean not even like holding hands? No hugs? No....kisses?" Bambam whispered the last part, hoping, wishing, he was wrong and his hyung wasn't as much of a loser. But all his wishes came crashing down when the older cleared his throat shrugging and avoiding eye contact.

And obviously, because its Bambam, he could not miss the opportunity of being a bit dramatic. So he deeply gasped and pretended that his knees gave out. Jinyoung quickly chucked an apple at the younger, hitting him in the shoulder.

"Stop judging me!" He exclaimed at the laughing boy in front of him.

"I need to know something else," Bambam chuckled taking a bite of the apple again, making sure he chewed slowly. Jinyoung nodded resting his head in his hands, totally feeling down that his little brother was laughing at him.

"If you never touched her, and she just shared that bit of information because you asked her. Why the hell have you been avoiding her advances? I would understand it if you just avoided touching her inappropriately but, hyung, you avoid any touches. Like its been more than a year you two have been dating and not even a kiss? Why is she dating you?" Bambam went on a rant, his last statement seeming more like a reflection than an actual question. That didn't stop Jinyoung from feeling offended.

"I-I-" the older opened and closed his mouth.

"Well, isn't that what's right?" He wondered out loud. Bambam scoffed.

"Why is she dating you?" This time he asked to the elder.

"She just shared what made her uncomfortable with her ex, not you, the least you should've done was make sure you weren't being inappropriate or making her uncomfortable. It's only normal for you to be attracted to her, hyung, she's your girlfriend after all. But at this point you've been depriving one of the essentials to a good relationship. I honestly don't know why she's still in it," Bambam spoke honestly, all traces of sarcasm gone. Jinyoung opened his mouth and closed it like a fish, not knowing what to say.

"What do I do?" Jinyoung whined and banged his head on the counter. Bambam looked at him with a disgusted expression.

"For starters, don't whine ever again, it's unsettling. And second, go get your girl before she actually realizes she shouldn't date you, and stop overthinking. Just make sure you don't make her feel uncomfortable. That's all you can do," Bambam spoke solemnly. Jinyoung nodded with a newfound confidence and smiled at his friend. "Thanks, Bam. Who knew you can actually give advice? The more you know, right?" Jinyoung grinned at Bambam's offended face, before dashing out of the kitchen and quickly grabbing his keys and jacket, he slipped his shoes on.

"You can stay as long as you want!" He screamed before slamming the door on his way out.

-

Jinyoung was in front of Y/n's house, panting heavily as he noticed her room's lights were on. He had ran all the way to her place after coming to the conclusion that taking his car was just going to be a hassle and a danger to his clouded mind.

He fished out his phone out of his pants pocket and quickly tapped to Y/n's contact before pressing the phone to his ear, hearing his phone ring.

"Pick up, pick up, pick up," he chanted softly before sucking in a breath when she picked up. The line was silent for a while.

"Jinyoung?" He exhaled deeply when Y/n's voice came through the speakers. Her voice strained, he cursed himself mentally thinking that she cried because of him.

"Hello?" She spoke again. Jinyoung cleared his throat.

"C-can you come out for a bit? I need to talk to you," Jinyoung asked hopefully. Y/n was silent for a bit.

"What are you doing outside?" She asked, he heard fumbling in the background before he heard a door open and close.

"I needed to talk to you," he muttered looking towards the house.

"I'm walking out now," and before he could say anything she had already hung up. Jinyoung shoved the phone in his pants when he saw the door opening and Y/n walk out.

She was wearing her pastel yellow cotton trousers and sweater set. He smiled fondly at the girl as she walked down the stairs of the house, her dark, wavy hair bouncing around her.

She quietly opened the main metal door and gestured for Jinyoung to enter, which he gladly did.

She closed the gate and turned making her way to the steps again, sitting on the step below the first one, Jinyoung followed her sitting on the top one not saying anything. She finally turned to him and his eyes softened when she offered a smile, though her eyes were puffy and nose was pink.

"I'm sorry, so so much," he blurted out. Y/n pulled her knees closer to her and rested her chin on them. A soft smile on her lips.

"It's okay, Jinyoung," she whispered, but he heard the small quiver her voice held.

"I-I thought you would be uncomfortable if I touched you, just like you were with your ex," Jinyoung fumbled with his fingers, now understanding why Bambam thought he was so stupid. He sounded like it. He felt Y/n's eyes on him but he did not dare look at her.

"Jinyoung," she called for his attention, the boy's head snapped towards his girlfriend.

"I don't think I would ever be uncomfortable with you, you're always so attentive and considerate," she said sincerely. Jinyoung smiled and scooted closer to her.

"Good, I never want to feel how I did today and most of all. I never want you to feel how you did today. I'm sorry I wasn't as considerate as you think I am. I'm sorry it took me this long to understand how stupid I was being," he honestly said, Y/n shook her head, smiling adoringly.

"Better late than never, right?" She muttered, Jinyoung looked at her face, feeling so much love for the girl in front of him. He nodded smiling.

"Right." He agreed. They stayed like that for a moment.

"Now let me hug you, I think I need it after my desperation, today," Jinyoung sighed lifting himself up and sitting on the step behind her. He wrapped his arms across her collarbones from behind and rested his cheek against her head. Y/n smiled lovingly and leaned back against his chest.

"What did you do?" She asked letting him sway her from side to side.

"Something terrible...I took advice from Bambam," he muttered kissing his girlfriend's hair and closing his eyes. She gasped jokingly before laughing.

"Jinyoung," she called for his attention. He hummed soflty.

"I love you," she muttered closing her eyes and leaning her head to his. Jinyoung smiled against her hair, he turned away his face from hers and pushed the back of his head towards the crook of her neck.

"I love you too, princess," he mumbled feeling at ease.

[channiebbang]

MASTERLIST

BANG CHAN

stubborn mind (fluff, angst)

[15:55] (fluff)

LEE KNOW

[17:23] (angst)

CHANGBIN

alone (angst)

HYUNJIN

none

HAN

none

FELIX

none

SEUNGMIN

bet (angst)

karma (angst) [bet pt II]

I.N

none

MARK

[01:37] (fluff, angst)

RENJUN

courting (fluff, angst)

JENO

none

HAECHAN

[23:30] (fluff)

JAEMIN

just listen, trust me. (angst, fluff)

CHENLE

[22:35] (angst)

JISUNG

none

CURRENTLY NOT WRITING FOR GOT7.

JB

little cupid (fluff)

MARK

fluttering hearts (fluff)

JACKSON

none

JINYOUNG

touch (angst, fluff)

YOUNGJAE

none

BAMBAM

none

YUGYEOM

none

[channiebbang]

uuuuhhh did i just hit 100 followers? 😳😳

I'm gonna blush, how did that happen holy-

thank you to everyonr that followed me and reads my fics 🥺🥺 y'all are literal gemsssss ily 😭😭

-h 💛💛

[channiebbang]

guys

I'm devastated :((((( i need to make the last few adjustments to the renjun oneshot but I've reached the maximum lenght of a post and AOHDHSVSKXGQIAVIJD

imma lose it 😢 but I'm determined and i will post it today somehow.

i have a birthday party to go to but I'll post it before i go!

[channiebbang]

reminder that requests are opeeeen!

follow the guidelines on my pinned post to request anything 🤠🤠💛💚

[channiebbang]

reminder that requests are still open and you can request anything you want heh just follow the guidelines on the pinned post on my profile 💛

[channiebbang]

this skyrocketed 😳😳 thank you so much for the 100+ notes, it means a lot 😭💚

I'm eternally grateful 💛

[01:37]

mark stepped up behind y/n as she stood against the railing of the bridge.

it was late at night, the only time mark could freely go out, a little less worried about the wondering eyes. not completely but at least he could rest his eyes on y/n instead of keeping an eye out around himself all the time, scared someone was going to photograph them together and it would ve the end of them.

late at night was an understatement as the sun was slowly peaking over the horizon of the han river, the sky painted a soft pinkish color.

his arms encircled around her as he put his head down, chin coming to rest against the crook of her neck as he looked out into the horizon like her. her hands raised to grasp on his arms across her chest as she rested her cheek against his.

"you're cold," she muttered as she turned to face his cheek. he chucked when her lips pressed to the skin before she turned forward again.

"you're cute," he countered, softly swaying her side to side. his arms tightened aroud her as his chest flushed against her back, nose nuzzling against the side of her neck.

"i wish we could stay like this forever," he muttered against the skin, lips brushing softly. y/n giggled.

"me too, mark," she whispered, and mark knew what was coming next but he hoped he had time. because time was all that he needed. his arms tightened in anticipation.

"c'mon, we gotta go," she caressed his hair and he groaned in annoyance.

"a bit more," he whispered, "please," he added and y/n smiled sadly, before softly turning around to face him. mark looked down at her as his arms rested around her shoulders, her chin propped against his collarbone as she looked up.

mark wished he didn't have to look at her eyes and he wished she didn't speak so clearly with them. maybe that way he wouldn't see the sadness swim in them. sadness she couldn't be with him as freely as she could, she couldn't love him as much as she wanted, she couldn't rely on his as much as she wished for.

because he couldn't be seen with her, he couldn't put her before anything, he couldn't promise forever.

but what she could do was love him unconditionally, love him as much as he deserved, let him find home in her, be the calmness he needed, show him kindness, be the comfort he wanted. so that's all she did.

"i'm sor-" she knew the words that were about to come out of his lips right before he said them.

"don't, please," y/n muttered, her brows furrowed as her arms wrapped around his waist and mark pressed his lips together as he looked away before looking back at her. one of hands rested on her cheek, thumb caressing the skin.

"you deserve so much more," he whishpered and she shook her head.

"no," she smiled as mark leaned his forehead against hers and sighed, knowing what she would say next and eagerly waiting for the words he loved so much, "you're my comfort."

and as the birds flew over them, chirping, and the first few cars drove by, the chilly breeze, the city of seoul coming alive, mark felt relaxed, he felt like he had everything he needed. and his words came out in a whisper, careful to not disturb the calmness.

"you're my comfort too, baby."

[channiebbang]

Hi! I've finished reading 'bet' and i loved it. Could i request a second part where seungmin hasn't stoped thinking of y/n since that day and wants to come back to her to apologize and be with her because he realizes that he is in love with her, BUT she already moved on and rejects him lol. Thank you in advance!

hey hey it took a while but you can find that here 🤠

i hope you like this 💛

[channiebbang]

happy birthday~ have a great day/night ahead!

thank you very much 🥺🥺

i really didn't expect any of you to wish me thank you a lot 💛💛💛

[channiebbang]

happy birthday !!! 🎂

thank you very much!! 💛😊

[channiebbang]

guys.... what the hell 😢😢😢

thank you so muchh for the 130 notes eivhqbxivwjdbi

[15:55]

"you'll come over later?" y/n asked as she stared up at chan with big eyes. she moved side to side on her chair.

he looked down at her, a soft smile on his lips as he admired her features. he slipped his jacket on.

"if you want me to," he giggled when she nodded right away.

"yes, come over. i want to start a new drama. i watched the first 20 minutes and it's really good," she smiled as her hands gestured while she spoke. chan caressed her cheek as he fondly nodded.

"cute," he smiled. y/n smiled big as she took chan's hand in hers.

"your hands are warm," she muttered and he nodded.

"i'll come over later then," he bent down to press a loving kiss to her cheek as he ruffled her head.

"okay," she smiled as she got up to walk him to the front door.

they stopped in front of it as chan bent down to put on his shoes.

"ah," y/n made a noise of realization, "i'll go out for a bit so tell me when you finish in case i'm not home."

"where are you going?" chan stood up as he hiked the bag up on his shoulder, picking up the briefcase that had his laptop in it.

"i need to buy a few things for the house," she shrugged her shoulders. chan nodded as y/n took a hold of his arms as leverage. her lips pressed against his cheek as she smiled into the kiss. chan's lips pulled into a smile too, a rosy tint coming up his neck and settling in his cheeks and the points of his ears.

"work hard, but not too hard," she grinned as her eye fell in a wink and chan smiled before an idea popped in his head. he nodded, hand rising in a wave.

"okay. imma go," he turned to leave, only to be tugged back softly.

"channie.." y/n's eyes were big and shiny under the front light. chan's eyes widened in wonder.

"yeah, what is it?" he fixed his beanie trying to conceal his smile.

"h-hug?" she asked timidly, her arms awkwardly dangling beside her. chan feigned a confused look.

"huh?"

"huuuug," y/n drawled out in a whine and chan couldn't help but smile before crossing his arms across his chest and leaning against the doorframe, a smug look on his face.

"nope," he shrugged, and y/n threw him a nasty look, brows furrowed.

"what do you mean nope. give me a hug!" she demanded as she shook his arms. chan snickered as he shook his head side to side.

"nope."

"you can't do that!"

"i'm just gonna go," he stood tall on his feet again and made to turn around before y/n trapped him into a hug, not letting go.

"excuse me! you can't do that! hug meee," she whined and chan laughed loud, head throwing back.

"nope, just gonna go," he wheezed out. y/n squished her cheek against his shoulder as she whined again.

"then you can't go! you can't take away the hug, mister!" she scolded and chan couldn't help but roar out a hearty laugh.

"okay, okay," he agreed and he turned around to her as he felt her arms soften around him.

he enclosed her in a tight hug, his nose nudging her hair as her arms encircled his waist, one hand running up and down his back in a soothing way.

his arms tightened around her as her hands flattened on his shoulder blades. suddenly the comfort of her arms too much to let go.

"and here you were refusing to hug me," she muttered against his shoulder in a snicker and chan hummed.

reluctantly they separated, not before chan pressed a kiss to the side of her head.

"i'll come back later, okay?" his hands rested on her cheeks as her hands grasped the end of his jacket. y/n nodded, her lips squished between chan's palms and he laughed.

"don't forget to eat," her words came out muffled and chan nodded, pulling her back in for one last hug. pushing the back of her head against his neck. he could feel her nose nudge his skin as she chuckled.

"be careful when you go out and text me when you do and-" "-and when i get back, I know."

chan smiled fondly as they pulled back and nodded. he rubbed up and down her arm as he finally unlocked the door and stepped out. y/n waited at the doorframe as chan pressed the button for the elevator. he turned back towards her as he waited.

"can i stay over tonight?" he asked timidly, his cheeks and neck painted a faint pink. y/n giggled and nodded.

"yeah, as long as you don't pull something similar to what you did earlier!" she pointed a finger at him as the elevator dinged and chan laughed nodding. he stepped inside and waved, y/n waving back.

"no promises," he smiled mischievously as the doors started to close. the last thing he heard a faint "i will sue you."

[channiebbang]

Hi! I just finished reading "bet" from seungmin's fic and i'm crying haha. Could i request one scenario like part 2 of that angsty story where she forgets him entirely but seungmin no, and feels so frustrated because of that. Then he runs into her and just wants to be his boyfriend again like seriously but she rejects him and yeah, i want a y/n being powerful and confident hehe

hiiiiii you can find thay here!

happy reading, i hope you like this hehe 💛

[channiebbang]

😢🥺🥺

thank you so much for 111 notes qkxbqjxjjq idk how i got so lucky! thank youuuu 💛💛

courting

synopsis: y/n has a massive crush on renjun and renjun has too much going on to care, or alternately, y/n courts renjun and gets him to like her, with a small misunderstanding in the middle.

characters: Huang Renjun, Na Jaemin, Main Character and a lil bit of Lee Jeno and Lee Haechan.

pairing: collegestudent!renjun x collegestudent!maincharacter

genre: fluff and a lil bit of angst

word count: 6.7k

warnings: noneeee

author’s note: it took me whole damn minute to write this lol initially i wanted the story to go differently but i kinda forgot along the way lmaooo this was supposed to be a han jisung one shot at first but then renjun inspired me more 🤠 i hope you enjoy reading this! let me know what you think about it! 🥺💛

she still remembered the first day she saw him. the first day she knew what love at first sight was.

renjun had always been a very reserved person. he liked to keep to himself and only hangout with his few friends. that ofcourse didn't mean he had no popularity around campus because holy shit did everyone know the boy.

he was known for being donghyuk's bestfriend, for being a clever student, for being a witty genius, a straight A student, a bookworm. but most of all he was knows for being the handsome dude that like silence, and being by himself when he wasn't with his friend.

y/n, like everyone else, knew of a huang renjun, but she had never had the honour to see him. see, y/n too was always immersed in her studies, and when she wasn't she liked to chill with her friends or be home with her family. she was a simple girl.

so imagine her surprise when one day, as she waited for her friend, she saw the most beautiful, handsome boy walk by. she was surprised because how could she, in her last two years of being in the same campus, not have seen this beautiful man. he must have been new, he had to. spoiler alert: he wasn't, she just never paid attention to her surroundings.

it was a few days after that she had seen him again and thanks to her friend she got to know that he was the huang renjun.

so, being the smart person she was, she decided she would court him. yes, court. like they did centuries ago. she would court him. despite not knowing anything about him, other than what people told her, she wanted yo get to know him and hopefully date him. simple as that.

huang renjun on the other hand, couldn't careless when word got around that a certain y/n had a crush on him. it never bothered him when other people came up to him so he didn't see how she would be any different. he just wanted to be chill.

he already had a lot on his plate with trying to balance his studies, art assignments, work, social life and family back at home to care about some fleeting crush someone had on him.

with having to live alone for so long he had already too much stuff going on and really couldn't be bothered to add more to it.

-

with the start of the new semester came the news that it was recommended to take another course for some extra credits and as much as renjun didn't want to he resigned himself and took a photography course. now, don't get him wrong, he loved photography. but he had already so much on his plate he didn't know how he was going to balance it all. thankfully, his friend jaemin was taking the course with him. and jaemin, being the sweetest, most caring, friend he was agreed to renjun's request to always group together if there was need. payment fee: be his model for the fashion course he was taking. renjun begrudgingly agreed. it was only just trying on clothes after all.

so on the first day of the new photography lesson the two boys walked in and sat somewhere in the middle, waiting for their professor to arrive.

"don't go back on your words," jaemin sent renjun a pointed look, his hands working on taking out his stuff.

"yeah, yeah," renjun muttered not looking up from his bag.

the sound of laughter made him look up towards the door, his eyes shifting back down to his bag when he saw a few girls walk in.

"oh, that's y/n," he heard jaemin mutter. renjun only hummed while finally putting his bag down by his feet.

"what?" jaemin asked as he turned towards his friend, brows furrowed in confusion. renjun shared the same look.

"what what?" he asked, kinda lost.

"that," jaemin subtly nodded towards the group of girls that sat a few seats in the front, on the side, before continuing, "is y/n," renjun followed his gaze only to look back at his friend.

"so?" he asked, not knowing where this was going. jaemin scoffed rolling his eyes.

"just showing you who your admirer is," he explained, renjun smiled before shaking his eyes.

"thank you for you kind service, sir," sarcasm dropped from every word, jaemin turned to him with a smirk.

"hmm kinky. call me that more," he slightly nudged him with his shoulder, leaning his elbow on the desk and resting his head on his palm. renjun's smile disappeared and he faked a punch to him, jaemin flinching away.

"get lost."

-

it took her a few more days for y/n to build up the courage to approach the boy.

she was nervous but she also told herself that if she got rejected then, well, it was a new experience. i mean, she had a 90% chance he would reject her. how she knew? well for starters, he was known for rejecting people, he made it very clear he wasn't interested in a relationship at all. people also said he was basically unapproachable, intimidating and cold.

she had mixed feelings about the last few; she had seen him multiple times with his friends, and he always seemed to have a soft smile on his lips and a glowing aura. so how could he be cold and intimidating?

but. now that she was standing a few feet away from him she could totally understand why they said he was unapproachable.

the boy wasn't with any of his friends. his expression was set to stone, to say the least.

y/n gave herself a little cheer before she started walking towards where he was going.

it's alright, just be yourself. people like bright people, right? it's gonna be okay. she told herself.

renjun's head snapped to the side when someone fell in step with him. he turned his gaze forward again thinking they might be walking by.

"hi!" y/n smiled brightly at the boy. renjun turned towards her again, his eyes looking around him in case she was talking to someone else but they were the only two walking. he slowly came to a stop.

"are you talking to me?" he asked, finger pointing at his chest. y/n giggled before nodding. she raise a hand, waving.

"hi, I'm y/n," she introduced herself. renjun sent her a skeptical look before nodding.

"renjun," he spoke uncertainly wondering why she was approaching him.

y/n felt at a loss of words after that. honestly speaking, she had never flirted with anyone or even tried to win anyone over really.

now, it's not like she had never dated, that she has, but she never made the first more.

her exes had told her that she tended to be a bit oblivious when people flirted with her, what with her being always friendly.

so being on the other end felt a bit nerve wrecking. she had a lot of respect for people that made the first move all of a sudden.

"i don't know if you heard about it, people really seem to like gossiping around here but i kinda like you," she said with a smile on her face.

renjun blinked. once. twice. a third time, before coughing awkwardly.

"what?" he spluttered caught off guard. y/n snorted.

"i like you," she repeated, the smile never wavering. she hiked up the strap of her bag on her shoulder.

suddenly her name clicked in renjun's head and he remembered seeing her in his photography class. he cursed under his breath before turning forward again.

"not interested," he muttered under his breath before stepping around her and walking towards where he was going before. y/n cursed under her breath before stumbling after him. the both unaware of the stealing glances people were giving them.

"i know you aren't," she fell into step beside him again. renjun took a deep breath before speeding up. y/n watched him before clumsily shuffling and taking two steps every one stride he took. renjun noticed and a smirk pulled up the corner of his mouth, before falling just as quickly.

"i will court you, if that's okay with you," she started again, "i know you're not interested in me. i will put in the effort to get you to like me," she giggled facing him as she followed.

renjun threw her a confused look before shaking his head. y/n checked the time on her phone before her eyes widened.

"shoot! my class starts in a bit, i gotta run! i'll hear from you again, bye renjun!" she waved before turning and running away, without waiting for the boy to say bye back. renjun scoffed at her childishness before getting in the hall where his class was going to be.

-

so that's how occasionally renjun would find chocolates or flowers on his desk in photography. jaemin had made it his job to tease him every time the two came into the class to find the little gifts. the blue haired guy even telling their other friends about it.

renjun had made it a routine to hand over all the chocolates he got to jaemin everytime, even though his favourite was among the little bunch. upon jaemin's question as to why he wouldn't eat at least the ones he liked, renjun's answer was, "i don't want to give her false hope and think i appreciate it."

and as much as he liked the flowers he gave those to jaemin as well, only to take them back saying they would be nice as props for art inspiration.

just like every other photography class, y/n had walked into the class with a few girls before they all walked to their spot. she looked over where renjun and jaemin usually sat, smiling when she saw the both sitting there. she fished out the little sketchbook and small flower ensemble from her bag before putting the latter on the desk and getting up.

"why do you do this all the time? it's clear he doesn't like you," one of the girls inquired, a smile on her lips. y/n shrugged, her eyes trained on one person only.

"i know he doesn't, but he also doesn't like anyone else," she winked down at the girl before stepping out of the desk, "which means, i still have a chance," she giggled as she turned around before walking towards the two boys.

"hi!"

the two bickering boys looked up at the sound of the chirpy voice before renjun rolled his eyes and jaemin smiled big at the girl.

"hi, y/n, what a surprise," jaemin teased as he winked at the girl. y/n giggled, a slow blush creeping up her neck.

"hello, jaemin," she politely waved before turning her eyes towards renjun, "hi, renjun."

renjun looked up towards her before averting his eyes again, "hi," he politely said.

his eyes shifted to his desk when y/n put down her small gift on his desk, his brows furrowing.

"why are you giving me this?" he asked, a slight tone in his voice. jaemin nudged him with his knee.

"thought you'd like a small sketchpad to have on you wherever you went. just in case you got a sudden burst of inspiration," she explained, the smile never leaving her lips. renjun looked up at her, a stoic expression on his face. y/n's smile faltered a small fraction but she hoped she masked it before her could notice.

renjun's eyes remained on the girl as he picked up the sketchpad and slowly pushed it aside on the desk, on jaemin's side.

"i don't need it," he deadpanned. y/n cleared her throat before brining up her smile again.

"then throw it away," she shrugged her shoulders before turning away and going back to her seat as renjun started after her, jaemin snickering beside him.

"well," he chuckled, "didn't see that coming."

-

it was at the end of the day, when renjun was walking around campus on his way to the library, that someone fell into step with him. he already knew who it was as a slow breeze wafted a floral scent his way.

he threw her a fleeting glance before making a double take. he felt his breath hitch in his throat before he masked it away.

the girl beside him looked ethereal in her baby blue shirt and high waisted loose fitting gray pants. her hair flew softly around her shoulders and face as the wind blew. the golden hue the sunset casted on her making her skin glow in contrast to her top. the cherry lip stain she had on brought accent to her lips in the most beautiful ways. renjun looked away as her eyes met his. she giggled. and renjun would never admit that to jaemin or his other friends but the sound was slowly growing on him.

"the weather is very nice today," she spoke taking a big breath, "want to get some ice cream?" she asked hopefully. renjun turned towards her only to be faced with big, bright eyes, shining in a way he could not put into words.

clearing his throat he turned away again as they made their way down the sidewalk.

"what are you doing?" he asked, his voice low and calculated, genuinely curious. y/n threw him a look before stepping behind him as a woman with a stroller passed by them. she peeked from behind him as she stepped beside him again.

"courting," she spoke with an obvious tone as they stopped in front of a streetlight.

"why?" he asked as they crossed the road. he came to a stop on the side of the street when he realized she had been following him.

"well," she started, "of course because i like you," she nodded, adjusting her bag strap.

"you don't even know me," he deadpanned. y/n rolled her eyes, an exasperated sigh leaving her lips and renjun's brows furrowed.

"well, of course not, that's the whole point of me courting you, dummy," her voice dripped incredulity as if he had asked the most obvious question.

he rolled his eyes as he started walking again, ignoring her words. she scurried after him as she tried keeping up with his steps. five seconds passed before she nudged him with her shoulder, grinning. a groan left his lips in response.

"so," she stretched out the word, "can i? court you i mean," her eyes went big as she waited for his answer. he let out a big sigh.

"it's not like you haven't been already doing it," he murmured. y/n's brows furrowed.

"you're right, i'm sorry about that," she apologized, and renjun could hear the pout before he even turned to look at her, "i'll stop if you want to. i really want your permission though. i wouldn't want to do anything you wouldn't like," she grumbled, upset she had unintentionally invaded his space.

renjun stared at her clear upset pout before he sighed again. he had been doing that a lot lately.

why am i agreeing to this, he thought as he closed his eyes for a second before he opened them again and turned a corner, y/n turning a second late.

"you can," he muttered as he stopped walking. y/n's eyes grew big as she gasped. her eyes lit up and a smile stretched over her lips as she looked up at him with big eyes.

"i can?" she asked in wonder.

"sure, be my guest," he shrugged his shoulders.

"really?" she asked again and renjun only nodded, his expression blank.

"but," he brought his index finger up and she looked at it before nodding, "i won't put aside my studies, job or anything just for your delusional attempt at flirting."

"courting! COURTING!" she corrected him after a loud groan and an eye roll. renjun doing the latter as well.

"yeah yeah whatever, that," he waved at her dismissively. she smiled at him.

"that's okay, but don't shut me out. you have to give me opportunities to court you, you have to be fair," she pointed at him as she pouted. renjun looked from her face to her pointed finger before he pushed it down. y/n's eyes shifting to the finger before muttering a sorry.

he glanced at her sideways a snort leaving him, "yeah, okay."

she smiled before a confused look took over as she looked at their surroundings.

"uhh, where are we?" she asked unsure, renjun looked back at the store they stopped in front.

"didn't you want to get ice cream?" he asked and y/n's eyes lit up a cheer leaving lips as she bounced on her heels.

"yes yes! let's go! it's my treat," she laughed as she pushed him aside and walked inside.

"sure," renjun muttered following her inside.

and that's how her courting began. sometimes it was ice creams, other times it was afternoons at the library, evenings in the art lab. and it went on for a few months. renjun's friends would sometimes tease him about y/n and he would begrudgingly tell them he wasn't dating her. he had explained times and times again what y/n said she were doing and they had told him the same thing every time.

yeah yeah dating, we get it.

word was getting around campus that the renjun was dating y/n and it was safe to say it was the hottest news. renjun, who had never cared about what they ever said about him, this time too, didn't bother to correct anyone.

-

y/n checked her phone as she speed walked. she was late to meet renjun and she knew how much he hated tardiness. she cursed under her breath as she skipped around the corner. her eyes searched around in hopes to catch a glimpse of the ash brown color haired guy. a smiled adorned her lips as she saw him. she was about to call out his name when she noticed him talking to someone. she jogged up to him and smiled as his eyes shifted to her.

"you're-," he started before she interrupted him.

"late. i know, i know. i'm sorry, i had to talk a bit to the TA," she giggled in apology and he rolled his eyes as he bid goodbye to the girl he was talking to.

"i'll get back at you about it. try to find as much as you can about the topic," he stretched his lips in a make shift smile for a second in greeting and the girl nodded, a teasing smile on her lips.

"don't get too lost in your date. i won't do the whole project on my own because you're out dating," she smiled jokingly. y/n pressed her lips together as her big eyes watched between the two.

the stranger's smile slowly fell as she noticed renjun wasn't smiling in the least, his face stone serious.

"don't worry about my date, worry about doing your part, bye."

and he turned and started walking away. y/n watched between his retreating back and her baffled face, an embarrassed blush adorning her cheeks.

"he's like that with everyone, don't take it too at heart," y/n sent an encouraging smile.

"y/n!" her head whipped to see renjun waving at her to be quick. she smiled for a last time to the girl before she ran up to him.

they walked in silence for a few minutes as she pouted. renjun took a deep breath before he looked at her out of the corner of his eyes.

"what?" he asked already knowing why she was pouting. she sent him a narrowed stare.

"you didn't have to be that rude," she sighed as she grasped the bag strap across her chest.

"yeah, well she was being nosy," he shrugged his shoulders.

"she was trying to be friendly."

"yeah, well she was trying to be friendly by being nosy and i don't like it."

y/n snorted at his pouted reply.

"ah!" y/n suddenly remembered as she rummaged into her bag, renjun watched her with curious eyes.

"here, this is for you," a small bag was pushed towards her and renjun carefully took it before opening it.

"what is this?" he asked, his brows furrowed in confusion.

"what do you mean? it's food, silly!" y/n giggled.

"yeah, why?" he asked, slowly fishing out one of the corndogs in the bag. y/n rolled her eyes jokingly.

"because you like them," she said after a sigh left her lips, wondering how he could be so oblivious. he nodded not feeling like arguing with her. no matter how many times he had told her not to spend money on his she never listened.

when he realized she just was a giving person he figured he would just buy her ice creams on the times they would go together.

"this is my stop, i'll see you around," renjun nodded at y/n as they stopped in front of the bus stop. y/n smiled as she nodded and waved. the bus stopped in front of the two and y/n watched as he walked up to the doors and into the bus, not once looking back.

as the doors closed and went away, so did her smile. she took a deep breath wondering if she had been too forceful on renjun.

was I too pushy? should I have backed away when he said he didn't like me?

and somehow she figured that really, renjun didn't need to like her. he had never said he liked her. it was all her.

she had been the one to push herself into his life, she had been the one wanting to court him, she had been the one to always wait for him after his classes, she had been the one dragging him to the ice cream parlor every other day.

renjun had always been clear on his feelings. he had said it in the beginning he didn't like her. he had only agreed to it all because he was nice, only going to get ice cream because she dragged him.

"hey! why the long face?"

y/n turned towards the sudden voice, her smile back on her lips as she crossed eyes with jaemin. she shook her head.

"got lost in my thoughts," she smiled, "it's getting late, i'll see you tomorrow!" and she was gone jogging to her bus stop.

jaemin let out a deep breath, wondering if she knew she was very bad at concealing her feelings from showing on her face.

-

golden rays seeped through the curtains in the silent home. a sweet melancholy atmosphere buzzed in the atmosphere. the silence creeped up the walls and enveloped the whole apartment.

the beeping of the main door unlocking sounded like a shrill sound in the otherwise mute surrounding. feet shuffled in before closing the door. soft steps sounded loud, the switch being turned on illuminated the whole flat in a bright light.

a sigh left her lips as she let her bag fall on the couch, walking to the bathroom.

twenty minutes later she was sat on the couch, a towel in her hand as she dried her hair. the silence made her ears ring, she hated it. hated this feeling.

she hated not being able to trust anyone, hated that she had nobody she could call friend at college, hated how she knew the people she hung out with during those few hours talked behind her back, called her naive, stupid, loser. she knew it all but she hung out with them either way.

y/n thought about calling her boss and going to work, being busy sounded like a thrilling idea instead of sitting in this silence, but she knew they were full.

she took a deep breath willing her mind not to fall in the deep hole she knew it was going to if she didn't busy herself fast.

so she got up and discarded her damp towel on the rack in the balcony before walking to the kitchen, wondering if cooking something would take her mind away from memories she wanted to keep locked away.

-

"renjun ah!"

jaemin walked into the room in search of his friend, his mind set on getting his words across the thick headed idiot.

he closed the door behind himself, his narrowed eyes set on the boy playing a game on his couch. renjun's eyes fled to jaemin before focusing back on the game.

"jeno and haechan said it will take half an hour and then they'll be here," he informed the blue haired male as he angrily pressed the buttons on his controller. jaemin nodded before taking four strides in front of the tv and turning it off.

"bro! what the fuck!" renjun shrilled, mouth hanging open in surprise.

"you're losing anyway," jaemin deadpanned before looking him straight in the eyes, "we need to talk."

"about?" renjun threw the controller aside, wondering what was this serious.

"y/n."

"what about her?" renjun sighed as he leaned back against the couch, curious where this conversation was going.

"don't you think you're being a bit unfair to her?" jaemin asked, his tone calm.

"how? i didn't do anything," his brows furrowed as he stared at his friend. a slight sliver of irritation hit him as he wondered if she had gone to whine to his friend about him.

"exactly, you don't do anything while she does everything!" jaemin exclaimed, his arms spreading before falling by his sides again.

"i don't know what you're reaching at, jaem," renjun sighed as his fingers pinched the bridge of his nose.

"what i'm trying to say, jun, is that the poor girl has been trying to woo your ass so hard for so long and you won't do anything about it!"

"what do you want me to do!" renjun exclaimed, suddenly feeling attacked, "she was the one that wanted to do all this courting bullshit! i never asked to do it! i told her i didn't like her!" he defended himself and jaemin rolled his eyes at his friend's stupidity. and he was supposed to be the top student huh?

"at least tell her again before she falls more for you while you don't care then! the poor girl has tried everything to make you like her! she knows your habits, your order at the café, pays attention to what you say, what you do. hell! she even knows when you crave your stupid milkshake because you had a bad day at college!" jaemin tried to reason with him.

"did she complain at you about all this? i swear!" renjun groaned as he stood on his feet, beyond angry that she had the audacity to complain when she was the one to start all this. jaemin looked at renjun as if he grew a second head.

"what? no! why would she say anything to me? it doesn't take a genius to figure all this out when the moment she's not with you she has sadness written all over her face."

"oh so now i'm the bad guy, great!" renjun laughed mockingly.

"nobody said you're the bad guy, jun," jaemin's voice softened up as he stared at his friend, clear anger on his features, "all i'm saying is to take into consideration her feelings too, and if your feelings still haven't changed for her then to tell her so she can move on."

renjun snatched his jacked from the armrest of the couch before storming towards the door.

"where are you going?" jaemin asked, his tone alarmed at the anger renjun was displaying.

"tell her to fuck off and not complain to my friends," hw muttered as he pulled away the door.

"oh! hey guys," jeno's eyes widened as renjun pushed away from him and haechan on his way out of the door. the two standing on the door stared as he walked away before turning towards jaemin.

"what's going on?" haechan asked as they stepped inside their den. jaemin waved his fingers in his hair as he let out a frustrated sigh.

"i think talking to him was a bad idea."

-

it was almost 11pm when y/n's phone rang. she was almost falling asleep on her couch when it started ringing, waking her up right away. she smiled softly as she read the name of the caller, clearing her voice as she picked up the call.

"hello? renjun?" she softly asked, wondering why he called her at this hour.

"send me your address, we need to talk," his cold tone made a shiver run down her spine as she muttered an okay before he hung up.

thirty minutes later he texted her to come out front. in the chilly breeze he stood in front of her apartment complex. she was wearing a hoodie and sweats as she walked out. she smiled at him as she stopped to stand in front of him.

"hey, it's cold, you can come inside-,"

"what do you want from me?" he interrupted her. a look of confusion fleeting across her face as she stared up at him.

"what?" her voice was small as she spoke. renjun rolled his eyes.

"why would you go and rant to my friends about shit that you could've told me?" he accused, and her confused expression just angered him more as he scoffed.

"ah yes! now comes the 'i don't know what you're talking about'. you wanted to do this courting crap, i told you before that i didn't like you! i don't understand why you would antagonize me to my own friends when i never even wanted this in the first place!"

"what? renjun that's not-"

"i don't care! just stay out of my life, will you? stop whatever you're doing, i don't care about any of it. this was stupid anyway," he mutter the last few words before turning away.

he had taken just a step before y/n grasped his arm.

"renjun," she called him, "i don't know what happened but this is not what-"

"are you saying my friends lied to me?" his head whipped back and y/n let go of his arm right away at the nasty look he threw at her. she softly shook her head.

"that's not what i said," she muttered adn renjun scoffed before turning away again.

"then stay the fuck away," he spat as he walked away and y/n stared after him as she felt a sharp pain on her chest, the familiar pain of heart break happening all over again.

-

she had stayed away from his as he asked. she didn't reach out anymore and she didn't approach him either. figured out if she was forcing herself on him, the least she could've done is listen to him and stay away.

jaemin regretted talking to his stubborn friend when he had pushed his shoulder against the girl's and greeted her just to receive a tight lipped smile and a soft hi before she had speed walked away. seconds later renjun had stood by his side, his eyes on the girl as he scoffed.

"what did she want?" he sneered and jaemin's furrowed his brows as he turned to face his friend.

"renjun," he called his attention and the latter turned around to face him.

"she never said anything to me," jaemin went straight to the point and when renjun made to say anything he held up his hand.

"i'm not covering for her. she never said anything to me or anyone. hell, she never even talked about you to me. all i know about what you teo had going on was from what you told me," jaemin took a deep breath at renjun's furrowed brows.

"that day you wouldn't listen to me. I don't know why you were that angry but she really didn't ever say anything. whatever i talked to you about was all because i wanted to say it. so if you have feelings for her tell her and if you don't then at least apologize to her," jaemin tried to reason with him

"we're best friends, i'm gonna tell you when you're wrong and being an idiot. and now, you're both," jaemin smiled at renjun before clapping his arm and walking to their photography class. renjun didn't say anything, too immersed in his thoughts.

they walked into the room and renjun's eyes were right away on y/n. she sat in her usual seat, surrounded by her friends as they laughed about something. y'n smiled but it didn't reach her eyes, she laughed but it didn't sound genuine and renjun wondered how he was able to tell. he shook his head and walked behind jaemin to their seat.

"hey, aren't you going to say hi to renjun?" one of y/n's friends. y/n's smile dimmed a little before she masked again and shook her head.

"i'm not doing that anymore," she shrugged her shoulders as to not seem too sad. the girls around her snickered and y/n felt a chill run down her spine.

"why? did he reject you?" one asked and y/n sent a tight lipped smile as she hummed.

"y/n! come here for a moment, please!" the professor called her and she thanked the heavens she got saved like that.

she got off her seat and walked down the steps carefully. what she didn't miss is the girls next words. they intended for her to hear it and they also wanted renjun to hear.

"of course he would reject her, she was so pushy with it."

renjun's brows furrowed as he heard those words, wondering how did friends talk about their friend like that, but what angered him more was that it was obvious y/n had heard them but she had just kept walking to the professor.

renjun shook his head telling himself he shouldn't care. he knew he had to apologize at some point but he also knew he didn't care for her, he had no feelings for her... right?

but as he watched the girl talk to the professor with her smile painted on, his heart tightened.

-

it was late at night when renjun lied in his bed, facing the ceiling, his body aching from slaving away at work, his shoulders in pain from the hunched evenings he spent in the library and the heavy feeling in his chest from having to balance so many things at once, that he longed for someone to rely on. finally he was coming to terms with the truth.

the truth was that y/n had been that one person that made it all go away; the aching, the pain, the heaviness and the emptiness. she had taken all of it away without even trying to. renjun thought back at that evening when he had went to a shop with his friends and as his eyes caught sight of the little fluffy keyring he had grasped it and with a small smile he had thought 'y/n will like this' only to remember y/n wasn't there anymore. he had pushed her away.

renjun's brows furrowed as he suddenly sat up, a determined look on his face. he had to make it right. he had to apologize.

so with a new found adrenaline pumping through his veins he got up from his bed and quickly threw on a hoodie and his shoes before running out of his home.

-

y/n secured the lock on the convenience store she worked at, shaking the door to check if she had locked it correctly, before taking the short walk to her building.

the chilly breeze felt refreshing against her cheeks as she walked the uphill street.

she stepped under the streetlight in front of her building when she noticed a crouched figure in front of her main door. she slowed down as she got creeped out, wondering where the security guard was.

the sound of footsteps made renjun snap his head up only for his eyes to cross y/n carefully stepping up to him, her eyes unsure before realization dawned on her.

"renjun?" she asked confused and surprised. renjun stood up before dusting off his jeans.

"hey," he whispered before realizing y/n was probably waiting for an explanation, "uhh, i rang up but nobody answered s-so i just thought about waiting here for you," he stuttered before clearing his throat and looking away, his eyes shifting to look around himself in emberassment. y/n smiled comfortingly and nodded.

"did you need anything?" she asked softly, and renjun stared at her for a moment before his brows furrowed.

"don't smile," he murmured and y/n's eyes widened before she blinked away.

"uhh sorry?" her tone unsure before renjun shook his head at the misunderstanding and waved his hand in front of him.

"no no, that's not what i meant. i meant like- if you don't mean it then don't. you don't have to fake it," he explained and y/n nodded her smile returning.

"i'm not faking it, i couldn't with you," she giggled before nodding with big eyes, encouraging renjun to continue.

"i- uhh, i wanted to apologize," he took a big breath, "for the way i snapped at you that day, without knowing anything. i shouldn't have been so rash on you. jaemin cleared things with me and i have to say, it was a total dick move of me to just assume you did something," he rambled on and y/n nodded.

"it was," she interrupted him and he nodded, looking down.

"but you don't have to worry about anything, i won't bother you anymore. i'm sorry too for pushing myself on you like that."

renjun's head snapped up at her words, his brows furrowed as she shifted on her feet, her fingers tight around her bag strap.

"no," he muttered and y/n's brows raised in question, "let's- let's try again, this time i'll meet you in the middle," he nodded and y/n stared at him, her lips parted so renjun took it upon himself to elabprate.

"i realized," he licked his lips as his eyes looked around before settling on her, his eyes screaming determination, "that i didn't realize how much you helped me until i pushed you away. i didn't realize how much i relied on you for comfort. until you were gone. you were there for me in so many ways, a-and i realized how much i liked having you around, how much i thought about you, until you weren't there anymore. i realized how much just the thought of you brought me calmness until i couldn't turn to you anymore. and calmness is what i needed, is all i needed to balance my crazy everyday life, and i want you in it again, but this time for good, and the right away," renjun took a deep breath after being done, feeling like if he didn't say all that at once he wouldn't be able to make her realize how much he needed her.

y/n's eyes shone as she looked at him.

"jun," she whispered and her tone panicked renjun. it was so quiet, so frail and it sounded like she had just given up, "you don't have to force yourself to make me feel better, i can handle rejection. it will hurt for a bit but i'll be okay," she reassured him and renjun shook his head.

"no, no, i'm not doing this because i feel bad for you," his brows furrowed and his tone laced with offence. he took a step towards her and wrapped his arms around her all of a sudden. y/n's eyes widened as her hands rested on his sides, taken by surprise at his sudden hug. renjun wasn't really known to be affectionate, "i really wanna give this a try. this time the right away, please, let's try," he murmured against the side of her face.

y/n slowly pulled away and looked at his eyes, shining like the stars above, he was absolutely breath taking. and she smiled, her usual soft smile as she reached up a hand to shift away a loose hair strand falling in front of his eyes.

"okay," she nodded and renjun smiled as he nodded. his cheeks suddenly went up in flames when he noticed his arms still around her frame and she giggled, slowly pulling away.

"have you eaten?" she asked as she turned away to put in the password to the building doors, and renjun smiled as the heaviness that once settled on his shoulders felt lighter and his chest hurt less.

"are you inviting me up?" he asked hopeful and she turned her head around to throw a funny look his way, "i'm telling you, i'm so exhausted i will eat everything in your fridge, sure you wanna risk that?" he teased as she opened the door and stepped aside to let him in.

"i'll take my chances," she smiled as he took a hold of her hand and pulled her towards the elevator, a smile adorning both of their faces.