#changes that go specifically after me-how dare

[baekuras]

tell me why tumblr has changed the shortcut to queue a post on desktop from alt+q to only q and NOW to shift+q

SHIFT+Q WHATTHEFUCK KINDA FINGER POSITIONING IS THIS???? you want my PINKY to be involved in internet activities?????

[asofterepilogue]

I apologise for the person I'll become when "would you fall in love with me again" is released

[sluttysnowangel666]

Northern Attitude - cregan stark x reader

Summary: Cregan’s wife feels he is a cold and distant husband, but he finds a way to show her just how much he loves her. he doesn’t mean to be cold it’s just his northern attitude 😏

cw: smutttttyyyyyyy it was almost fluff but i just can’t help myself lol. reader slaps cregan a few times, (not abusively im just a freak😔), size diff, oral (f & m receiving), spanking, porn with little plot

masterlist

Cregan Stark loved and adored his wife. Perhaps he loved her almost too much, as he avoided doing anything that might tarnish her as a lady.

He did not share his chambers with her, even though that was the custom in the North. He rarely touched her, aside from their rather delicate bedding ceremony after their union. And, he rarely spoke to her, as he was too afraid of saying anything that may disrespect her.

His wife found this agonizing.

Their union had, of course, been one out of duty but it didn’t change the fact Cregan had been more interested in her than any other maiden in the North. Her father, Lord Mooton, had offered her hand years ago when Cregan’s father Rickon still ruled the North, but his father felt Cregan should one day make that decision on his own when he became Warden of the North.

Cregan had met her when they were both ten and three, when his father Rickon hosted a feast for all of the Northern lords to come and celebrate the end of a particularly harsh winter.

She was timid and quiet, but they shared a dance and then she had never left Cregan’s mind since.

Now, some odd years later, she was his wife and he was delighted. However, his wife believed to think their union was misery for him.

Their first bedding was ever so gentle, Cregan lightly caressing her hair and cheeks, yet he held his head low into her neck to contain his moans. Her sweet whines and whimpers made him want to go feral, yet he dared not defile his wife.

She was still the quiet girl he fell in love with all those years ago. She sat next to him silently during feasts and trips to other houses, almost like a pet that only acts when called upon. When she did attempt to make conversation with her husband, his words were short and dry. She knew Northern men were often of few words, but she did not expect her union to be that way. If he was so cold, why had he chosen her specifically? The thought frustrated her greatly.

It was not his intention to be this way. It was just how his father was, and he couldn’t help but learn that behavior.

When Cregan learned he would have to make a moon’s trip to the Wall, he wanted to make sure his wife would be in well hands before leaving.

Knock. Knock. Knock

“You may enter.” She said, softly.

She turned as her husband entered her chambers, dressed in his furs and armor. Her eyebrows furrowed in confusion. He closed the door behind him, then stepped a few paces closer inside her chambers.

“Are you leaving?” She asked, trying to hide the frustration in her voice.

“I must go to the Wall; the men there are in dire need of supplies and support. I plan to bring any prisoners of Winterfell to clear up our cells so that they may take the black.” He says, walking to sit across from her in front of the hearth. He admires her soft gray gown. Her hair was in Northern braids, out of her face so that it was revealing her delicate features. Her eyebrows knitted again, something he noticed she did when she was upset.

“Will you be alright to rule in my stead while I am gone?” He asks.

“I will be fine, husband.” She responds, curtly.

“If you feel unsure, I can-“ He asks, wanting to make sure she feels comfortable enough, but she cannot hide her anger anymore.

“I said I will be fine! Just go, and leave me alone as you always do!” She yells, standing and walking away from their seats at the fire place.

“Have I offended?” He asks, following behind her. He rests a hand on her shoulder, but she turns to face him and pushes it away.

“No. You’ve made your point to not offend at all, in fact. We’ve been wed for three moons, you’ve only taken me to your bed once, and you refuse to even acknowledge that I’m here. You avoid me like the plague, Cregan. Have I been the one that has done something to offend?” She asks, her voice thick with anger.

He can’t help but let out a dry laugh, “Apologies, my wife,” He takes her hands in his, and she nearly gasps in shock at his touch. “You must forgive my northern attitude, I was raised on little light.”

“You seem to forget I’m Northern as well, husband.” She says, finally catching his eyes for the first time in their marriage. A small smirk plays on his lips.

“My wife, you are such a beauty, and if I am a distant husband then I apologize for that. It is no fault of your own. I simply do not wish to… treat you any less than a lady deserves, but it seems I have gotten too lost on the way. I apologize for my errors, Lady Stark.” He rubs his fingers gently over her hands. She doesn’t know how to respond, a dry chuckle escaping her lips. All this time, all she wanted was some hint that Cregan Stark had any sort of emotions or feelings, and here was her confirmation. He did, and by the old gods and the new did he have many for her.

“When I return, my dear wife,” His finger traces her jawline. “I promise you that I will treat you with the respect you want and deserve. In the meantime, I do beg for your forgiveness. This is my first union.”

She lets out another dry chuckle. “It’s mine as well.”

He presses a gentle kiss to her cheek. “I will send a raven the moment I reach Castle Black.”

With that he turns to leave…

But she isn’t done with him.

Cregan is almost sure it didn’t happen, he hardly even felt a breeze through his furs, but when he hears the sound of metal on the floor he knows she threw something at him.

He turns to look at the mug on the floor, then to his wife, bewildered. “Did you just throw a chalice at me?”

“Your lady has not given you permission to leave.” She says, “I want the wolf I was promised.” She continues, standing across the room.

“What?” He asks, confused. She throws another mug at him, but he deflects it this time. “Stop, what- What are you doing?!”

He holds his arms up to shield himself as his wife throws more and more objects from him, including her boots, candelabras, books, nearly anything she can get her hands on.

He walks towards her, angry, ready to… he doesn’t even know, perhaps frighten her into stopping.

She places his hand on his chest when he’s finally in her reach. She takes his hand, pressing it to her chest to tear off her gown. He lets his hand go limp, but she makes him do the work anyway. He’s too confused to understand because she was just so angry with him. She lets his hand fall and begins to take off the dress herself. It falls to the floor off her body, and then she is standing naked before him.

“My lady-“ She cuts him off with a harsh slap across his face. He stares back at her, his jaw slack.

She does it again, his head barely even moving at her hand. It wasn’t the pain (there was none), but the act that was pissing him off.

She goes for a third, but he grabs her by the wrist before she can reach him.

“This is your only warning, my dear wife.” He says, holding her small wrist in his hand.

“Or what?” She teases. It was that response; that sultry, lustful, desperate response that makes him realize she was teasing him. She was aching for him, eager for her husband before he left her.

He doesn’t move, staring her down with a fire burning in his gray eyes. Her other hand finds his other cheek again, and his length grows stiff in his leathers.

He lets go of her wrist, only to grab her by the waist and toss her on her bed. She gasps as she lands, giggling shortly after.

He climbs over her, resting his weight on his hands and leaning in to give her a deep and tender kiss. She moans, immediately pulling his head closer and weaving her fingers in his curls. He moans in response, his hand finding its way to her breast.

“I’ll make it up to you, wife.” Cregan says, pressing kisses on her cheek before moving down her body. He kisses every part, before resting between her legs. His hands wrap around her thighs, kissing and licking softly just outside her wetness.

She whines, wiggling around only for him to press a hand on her stomach to keep her still. He pulls her onto his lips, and she lets out a sigh of ecstasy. He’s harsh and unrelenting on her cunt, unlike how she’s ever felt before. Her pleads for him fall upon death ears as Cregan realizes just how hungry he was for her.

He wanted to say fuck the journey, fuck the Wall, fuck the North, fuck everything. He wanted to die here, in this sweet and delightful cunt of his wife’s. Her fingers lace into his brown curls, pulling on them tightly, and he whimpers at the sweet pain.

Her eyes water as she draws closer to her climax, the feeling so foreign and unique that she doesn’t know how to react.

“Husband, oh gods.” She cries. She grinds her hips onto his face, and he lets her lead. He locks his eyes onto hers, but that fiery look in his eyes makes her break first, and she throws her head back as she releases onto his lips.

He kisses her thighs as she comes down, a trembling mess in his strong arms. He kisses his way up her bare body, until he’s face to face with her. Her eyes are closed tight as she attempts to catch her breath.

“Will you stop throwing things at me now until I return, my dear?” He asks, gently.

She opens her eyes to look at him, “Where has my wolf been hiding this whole time?”

“In his den.” He gets off the bed and stands, prepared to take his leave when she grabs his wrist.

“You wish to go before I can return the favor?” She asks.

“You needn’t do such thing.” He says, not wanting to cross too many boundaries.

“You’re too modest.” She says, pulling him back towards her by the band of his leathers. He wants to push her off, but can’t. She unlaces his breeches, then stands from the bed to remove his cloak and furs.

“My men are waiting for me, wife.”

“What’s a few more minutes to the Warden of the North?” She says, lowly. She undresses him, from his armor down to his small clothes.

She kisses down his chest, as he just did to her moments prior. She slowly takes him into her mouth, licking and sucking on his length.

Cregan groans, his hand instinctively finding its grip in her hair. She whimpers at the sudden pull, and he immediately loosens it.

“Don’t stop. I like it.” She whispers against him. He obliges, pushing her head deeper onto him.

“Fuck.” Cregan moans in the air, his voice rising an octave. He’s almost embarrassed at how desperate he sounds. “Please, wife, just like that.”

His hands gently rest on the sides of her head, his fingers woven into her hair as she slobbers onto him.

“My husband is more needy than me.” She whispered, and gods was she right. Cregan had grown to regret being so coy with his wife the past few months.

“The gods have blessed me with you, my wife.” He moans, and she smirks onto him. She finally had him right where she wanted him.

“Then bless me in return.” She says, pulling away and leaning back on the bed, spreading her legs to bare her sweet cunt to him. He moans at the sight alone. He crawls over her, positioning his length along her entrance. She eagerly wiggles her hips, only for him to push her hips down.

“Patience, little wife.” He says.

“I’ve been patient for three months. I fucking want you, Cregan.” She pushes him onto his back beside her. She mounts him, sliding herself down onto him. Cregan moans loudly, and she smirks.

She ignores the aching stretch, immediately grinding her hips against him. His hands grasp her waist, holding them so tightly they’ll bruise by the time he leaves.

She throws her head back in ecstasy as Cregan keeps his attention on her face. She is beautiful, even when she is a whining and sweaty mess. One of his hands cup her cheek, weaving his fingers into her locks. She stares down at him, her mouth agape as she moans.

“You are so beautiful, wife.” He says, rocking his hips below her to meet her thrusts. “But your little tantrum isn’t going to go unpunished.”

He locks her in place with his hands, refusing to let her grind against him any longer.

“Wait, Cre-“

He pushes her off, rising from the bed so that he can push her onto her stomach. He pins her wrist behind her back, her fingers twirling to try to find any support to hold onto.

“Now how many items did you throw at me, lovely wife?” Cregan asks, lost in the lust that he had tried to bury when he married his wife. Now, he had no shame to degrade her.

“I… I can’t remember.” She says, muffled into the furs of the sheets.

“I believe it was 6. Let’s make it fair.” He says, landing a harsh smack to her bottom. She lets out a whine, and he pushes himself back inside her, not giving her a moment to catch her breath. Her breath hitches in her throat, and he lands another smack, intending to leave marks.

“Good luck sitting on that throne while I’m gone, wife.” He says, landing way more than 6 smacks to her red bottom. She moans at the pain and pleasure of the smacks and Cregan’s thrusts. The feelings were overwhelming, yet pure ecstasy. Tears brim her eyes as she screams in pleasure, sure enough so loud that all of Winterfell will hear.

“I hate you.” She moans.

“On the contrary. I think you love me.” He says, pressing his chest to her back and wrapping his hand around her throat, continuing to be in relentless with his thrusts. He drowns in her lascivious moans, feeling her cunt leak all over him and her bed. He reaches his other down to her cunt, gasping at all of the wetness that pools in his hand.

“Gods, wife, I didn’t realize how bad we needed each other. You should have told me sooner. I would have defiled you a long time ago.” He groans into her hair. She whimpers pleads of her need for release, and he grants it to her.

She cries in such pleasure, her hands finally finding a comforting grip against Cregan’s hand around her throat.

She rakes her nails into his hand, and he moans, finally spilling himself into her after three long, aching moons.

He presses a gentle kiss to her temple, then pulls out to lay beside her.

“Are you alright, my wife? Did I hurt you?” He asks, caressing her red bottom and her waist, tinted red from his harsh grasp.

“No, not at all.” She breathes.

“No, I didn’t hurt you or no, you’re not alright?”

She laughs, turning to face him to hold his cheek. “Husband, I am better than ever.”

He kisses the tip of her nose, gently caressing her cheek, not wanting to leave her.

“Must you still go, husband?” She asks, sadness in her voice, “Just when I’ve finally got you?”

“Unfortunately I must go… But, tis’ like you said; They can wait another day for the Warden of the North. I want to be with my wife.”

She smirks, propping herself up to look over him. “Northern attitude indeed, my lord husband.”

[couldeatthatgirlforlunch]

Hi!

I’d love a part two to your hit me hard and soft fanfic. Maybe Y/N continues to avoid them as a romantic relationship but begins to accept a platonic one liking eating with Dick or hanging out with Jason at school, etc… but the Batfam gets impatient and talks about why they are afraid (and maybe hunt down the ex which could gain their trust?)

Hit me Hard and Soft: Whispers in the Shadows

Synopsis: The relationship between the batfam gets broken after mistakes lead to accusations, and accusations lead to contingency plans.

Pairing: Yandere!Poly!Romantic!Batboys X Gn!Reader

Tw: Poly!Yandere; All characters aged up; Possible betrayal; Bad father Bruce, but is he actually the asshole here?; Arguments; Mentions of killing and torture; Possibly ooc batboys: English is my 2nd language.

Word count: 2k

Requested? Yes.

Extra notes: Not much action between Reader and the batboys here, but definitely something. Read the end to answer my question👀

General masterlist | Hit me Hard and Soft - Series masterlist

— You can't be serious.

The tension was at its highest point. Only a few times priorly did the conflict between all of them get this bad, and as always, they feared things couldn't go back to the way they were.

��� I am being serious. That's how things work. — Bruce stated darkly and Dick narrowed his eyes. — We tried it the nice way, I trusted you to behave, but you couldn't do that. — Bruce raised his gloved hand and pointed at Damian. — First, Damian can't control himself. He spent a decade acting right. Justice, not vengeance. But now, he's using (Y/N) as an excuse to defile orders and act as an assassin again! — Damian hissed and clenched his fists, taking a step forward.

— If you really cared for them, you would understand, father! But as always, you put your so-called mission above everything, even us! Even them! — Bruce clenched his jaw and narrowed his eyes in his direction, then turned to Jason.

— And you! How many chances do I have to give you? Both of you! You don't change. You will never change. And until you do that, you will never deserve (Y/N)’s or mine trust. Or their love. — Jason's heart broke in two, but he didn't react on the outside. Just kept his hard, Red Hood’s exterior. As he always did every time he and Bruce had a falling out.

— Bruce… — Dick muttered, a mix of a warning to remind him of not going too far, and betrayal by what he was witnessing. Bruce didn't look phased. And the fact he was still wearing Batman's suit, minus the cowl, just made this whole situation more genuine. He was neither Bruce Wayne, the persona, nor Batman, the vigilant. He was just Bruce. Their boss and their father.

— You hunted down that man, tortured and killed him! And you… — He took his gaze away from Jason and glared at Damian again. — Knew about it, and didn't notify us!

— I did know about it. Todd, you should have told us before. I also wanted that scum’s blood in my hands-

— ENOUGH! THE BOTH OF YOU WILL STAY AWAY FROM (Y/N). FOREVER.

Tim raised an eyebrow.

— Sound’s convenient. — All head’s snapped in his direction.

— What do you mean, Tim? — Dick asked. All muscles on his body tense. Tim gazed at him for a moment, then at Damian and Jason, then at Bruce again, staring directly into his eyes. — I just think it's very convenient that Bruce's getting rid of two of them. While your reason checks with past conflicts we had, with your morals and mission. It's also good for you that you wouldn't have to share (Y/N)’s attention with so many people in the future. Right, Bruce?

Silence took hold of the room.

— What are you implying? — Bruce stomped forward until he was face to face with Tim, their nose’s almost touching, daring him to say more. Tim didn't back down.

— Yeah, Tim, what're you implying? — Jason raised an eyebrow behind his helmet and took a step forward. The others copied that action.

— I’ve been watching you, Bruce. Just like you've been watching us. I know you’ve been upgrading contingency plans, more specifically, our contingency plans. I think he's been trying to keep us busy. To rile us up to commit mistakes. While he hogs all of (Y/N)’s attention. He said Damian could be trusted again if he proved himself, that was a year ago, and he still didn't give Damian permission. I bet he knew Damian would get restless and get more violent with criminals. Until he had an excuse to kick him out. And Jason, he let you spend time with (Y/N) at university. But as soon as (Y/N) started calling you their best friend, hanging out with you outside of classes and even confiding in you about their trauma, proving that our plan to make them trust us was finally working, suddenly (Y/N)’s ex receives an offer to transfer to GCPD, while everyone here has a… Weakness, when it comes to losing people we love and avenging their suffering, it's a known fact some are more… Trigger-happy than others.

Dick shook his head.

— Tim, that's something serious you're accusing him of.

— Let him continue. — Bruce growled darkly.

— I don't have anything to accuse you of, Bruce. I just don't trust you. — He shrugged as if it wasn't a big deal.

— So you're ready to brush off what they did? — Bruce accused and Dick started to feel even more restless seeing that the distance between them didn't change, feeling the urge to get in the middle and defend his little brother.

— I didn't say anything. But I wouldn't be surprised if me or Dick were next. — That made Dick snap.

No, he can't.

He can’t keep me away from them.

After everything I did.

We're just so close now.

Just earlier today we were having lunch together.

He can't.

He can't do this to me.

Is that how Jay and Dami felt? Is that why they snapped and started killing people? Is that why Jason killed that guy? Just for the idea of losing them forever?

Is that why, even with how heartbreaking and horrible it sounds, any possibility of someone trying to take them away from them made Tim voice out his paranoia? Thoughts Dick had when everything was quiet, when he just brushed it off as intrusive thoughts?

It isn't… Logical… But it also is…

The only thing stopping him from believing Tim wholeheartedly is the lifelong trust he had on Bruce. But those are just feelings. And they all feel. Intensely. For you.

And as much as they tried to make it peaceful, everyone having a piece of you and being happy. They were having problems, and a traitor was always a possibility.

Either way, he couldn't take that chance.

That night, Wayne Manor slept almost completely empty. All of the sons were gone. And you would know it too.

It's been a week. They've been meeting at the apartment just beside yours. It was empty, until Damian bought it, and started living there after cutting ties with his father. He wasn't happy that the others were also using it as their nest, a place to meet and talk about strategies. And keep an eye on you.

Damian was slowly steering his tea, mind elsewhere, not really paying mind to the conversation. While it was important, his stomach was full of butterflies and his heart pounded hard every time he thought about earlier, something he couldn't stop doing. After a whole year of being almost completely away from you, finally spending time with you was like a dream. That just made his resentment towards his father grow worse, even if he didn't do that on purpose, it still felt like injustice.

He knew since he was born, his way of doing things was always better.

He just told you he didn't know that part of the town much, and you, sweet you, already acquainted with his brothers, invited him to show him around. A bad taste came to his mouth whenever he thought he was the least close to you, even if he knew everything there was to know about his beloved. He got left behind. He let himself be left behind.

Because he was weak. Because he was submissive. Because he trusted his father.

His mother did send him to his progenitor's home saying that he needed to learn from him.

— We could use the League.

All heads snapped to him.

— Huh?

— We are talking about contingency plans for our father. We could have the League of Assassins on our side. Infinite resources against one single man. (Y/N) would live in luxury. And they did tell us… — His heart warmed at the sensation of finally feeling included in your life. — … Multiple times that they despised the cold weather Gotham always seems to have. Eth Alth'eban is always hot.

— We are not joining those fuckers, and you shut down that idea before I start believing what that old man said about you and kick your ass into your grave, demon brat. — Damian kept stoic after Jason's response.

— We could use the League for something good for once. I could. As the Head of the Demon. — He retorted with confidence.

Dick shook his head in disbelief.

— Dami, I think that's too much. It would only prove what Bruce was trying to say. — Damian leaned forward, as if getting closer would make his point come across as more genuine.

— I could do it! Not as a dictator like my grandfather! But as something actually good! Not just for us, but for everyone! The whole world!

— Does that megalomaniac plan of yours have an actual strategy? — Damian rolled his eyes.

— Of course it has. Kill anyone who gets in the way of my rightful place at birth. — Damian tilted his head at Tim, who looked at him in disbelief.

— Even Ras? — Damian frowned. What a dumb question. Damian would do anything for you.

— Especially Ras. — A fist hit the table and the oldest got up with a scowl in his face.

— No one. Is going to kill. Anyone. And we are not going to use the League. — Damian got up too.

— What is stopping you? This is for (Y/N)! It is not just some fucking petty act to annoy father. He acted behind our backs and he will take my beloved from me! From us!

— We don't know that yet! — Even with Dick's exclamation, it was clear not even him was totally sure about Bruce's intentions.

— … Failing to prepare is preparing to fail. — Tim muttered. They all observed he had a distant look on his face, it was the look he had when he was planning something. After a few seconds, he looked up again and got up, facing Damian. — I'm with you. It’ll be nice to see Ras look when he realizes he lost to me one last time. And to have whole guardianship of my spleen he keeps on his bedside table again.

— What? — The other three sputtered.

— I won't kill anyone. But I will help you and be an ally. Even if that means losing the Titans and leaving behind everything I build here. All for (Y/N). — Tim spoke. Jason got up.

— Tim, you can't be serious too. — He received a glare in return.

— I am. You're invited to join us. Or to become our enemy.

Damian was staring at Tim, the brother he always had a strange relationship with, full of fights and sarcasm, but they always knew they could count on each other in the end. Because they were family.

Of course, it would be nicer to have you all to himself, but he also needed more allies, and brilliant minds like his own. It would also hurt to lose every person he loved while choosing you, even if he would always choose you in the end.

— … What if (Y/N) doesn't trust us after this? — Dick mumbled, trying to see both sides before making a decision.

— We’ll explain to them. About how we got rid of every single individual who wanted to isolate and steal them from us. How we want to care for them. Keep them safe. And how I- We, made the world a better place in the process. — Dick glared at him halfheartedly.

— We have a solid plan here, Dick. We Just have to form our strategies based on what we have. It will work!

Dick sighed and rubbed his face with his hands. He started walking around the apartment, contemplating, listening in on your apartment and Tim and Damian in the background, trying to convince Jason.

When even Jason seemed convinced, Dick knew what he had to do.

Everyone turned to him when he came back to the table again, in expectation.

He looked Damian in the eyes and put his hand on his little brother's shoulders. So grown. So different from what he was before meeting you. You brought the worst out of him. Out of all of them. And you didn't even know it. That was the worse part.

But Dick was always known for being a manipulator.

— Congratulations, you're the new Demon's Head.

Extra note: I'm curious to if you guys think Bruce was actually planning something and not just being regular canon Batman putting his morals above family👀

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[lijojo]

“zip it up for me, would you darling?”

premise: tonight, the two of you are attending a very important gala and you need help zipping up your dress. how does he react? tw: suggestive, minors dni

teases you

he'll zip it up, but not without a fight. you groan as he wiggles his eyebrows through the reflection of the mirror. instead of zipping the dress quickly like you'd hoped, his hands make themselves at home inside the dress.

his touch is light, but very much present, his fingers run down your back, tracing circles over your hips before wrapping around to your stomach. the way the dress hugs against your skin has his hands pressed even that more closely to you. he gives a playful squeeze to your stomach before trailing his hands lower—

you grip his wrists through the fabric of your dress.

"this is a rental," you remind him carefully. "you're going to stretch the dress out if you go any further."

he hums. "that's fine with me. i can always buy you a nicer dress."

he smiles coyly, pressing a kiss to your cheek. "in fact, i'd prefer there be no dress at all."

you stare at him, surprised. but before you can reply, he's already removed his hands and zipped up your dress.

"but we can always save that for after the gala, right?"

alhaitham, childe, kaveh, venti, gorou, kazuha, heizou, ayato, kaeya

uses it as an excuse to fluster you

he'll eye you intently through the reflection of the mirror before slowly dragging his gaze down the line of your back. his gaze is heavy, letting you feel his eyes prickle on your skin.

after moments of silence, he'll zip up the dress for you, just like you asked, but he'll also pull you close to him. his hands plant themselves at your hips. his chin finds its place in the crook of your neck as his lips rest dangerously close to your ear.

there's a sly smirk playing on his lips that's telling you he's up to no good.

"now it's your turn to return the favor, dear. i need some help zipping up my pants. or zipping down, if that's what you prefer."

alhaitham, diluc, kaeya, zhongli, childe, ayato, scaramouche, venti, cyno

gets flustered

when you asked him, he'd been too preoccupied with his own suit that he didn't notice your bare back exposed to him. but when he finally looks up, he freezes.

you peer at him curiously. "is something wrong?"

for the first few seconds, he makes no reaction. his eyes are stuck to your back. you smile at his silence. "what, can't handle a bit of skin?"

it's then that he finally snaps out of it. but he doesn't dare move or change his posture.

"um, no. it's fine."

you quirk a brow at him but say nothing more about it. "then can you help me? i don't think i can reach it."

he's hesitant, but moves towards you regardless. with a pair of shaky fingers, he zips up your dress.

if you pay attention close enough, you'll hear him whisper softly under his breath.

"this is dangerous."

xiao, tighnari, scaramouche, albedo, zhongli, thoma

makes you late to the gala

he doesn't zip it at all. in fact, the moment you offer, he's on you.

"you're so beautiful. how did i ever get you as a lover?" he says as he peppers you in kisses. his arms wrap around you, tugging you closer to him. "you're gorgeous. stunning. even without the dress. speaking of which..."

needless to say, the two of you arrive fashionably late to the gala. with both of you needing to redo your hair and makeup, you two don't arrive as early as you'd planned. nonetheless, while you exchange greetings with other guests, your delivering very specific looks to each other, as if suggesting round two.

kaeya, childe, venti, kaveh, heizou, itto

[itsmarsss]

stupid. [Peter Maximoff x Reader] (X-Men)

[~from the vault~]

Friends kiss all the time, right? Right?

Word count: 2,062

Warnings: none i don't think i even use the word fuck here like who even was i this is just fluff

[. . .]

“Okay, truth or dare?” Jubilee asked Peter, an unmistakably mischievous look on her face. 

It was funny, actually, to think that a group of mutant teenagers with unimaginable powers would be spending their weekend doing such mundane things, such as throwing a party and playing truth or dare like a bunch of seventh graders, but the truth is that none of you ever really had the chance to have that before, most always too weird to be with the normal kids.

So, truth or dare on a saturday night in the middle of the woods it was.

And of course you knew how this was going to go. You didn’t even have to be his best friend to know what he would pick without a hint of hesitation. 

“You know it,” Peter replied with a signature smirk.

Scott let out a groan. “There’s not even anything for you to do anymore!”

“There’s still plenty of stuff for me to do!” Peter defended himself, a hand over his chest feigning offense.

“No, he’s right! You never pick truth!” Warren joined Scott in complaining.

“Because I’m not boring! You guys are just laaaame.”

“I don’t know, lick that tree over there or something,” Jubilee murmured, uninterested.

“What? That’s all you got? Come on, you can do better! Dare me to run to Hawaii or something!”

“How would we know you actually went to Hawaii?” Kurt asked, and Peter tilted his head to the side, realizing what he said made sense.

“Just pick truth already!” Jean exclaimed, clearly annoyed at the amount of time his turn was taking. 

Peter put his arms up in surrender. “Okay, fine! But it’s gonna be lame.”

Jubilee quickly seemed to gain her excitement again, smiling as she thought of what to ask, snapping her fingers as she finally landed upon a question. “Okay! Have you and Y/N kissed before?” 

He seemed to be taken by surprise, shifting in his seat, and you felt your own cheeks burning, hoping the lack of light would hide it. Of course she would want to ask something like that. 

“C’mon. Something not so lame. What are we, 12?”

“Answer the question!” Scott egged him on, and Peter looked at you, silently asking you what to do. You didn’t even say anything, but you assumed he noticed how flustered you were, as he decided to spare you and lie.

“No. Happy?”

You thought they would let it go, but got confused when everyone other than you and Peter turned to Jean, who, after a moment, spoke up. “He’s lying,” she affirmed.

And then it was chaos. 

“Oh my God! When?”

“I knew it!”

“Holy shit how was it?”

“Stop reading my mind, witch!” Peter yelled. You knew him. Usually he’d be pretty proud to talk about how he 'got with the girl' or whatever. But Peter also knew you, and you both knew that you had specifically agreed to not talk about this. So he tried to change the subject. “Okay, okay, that’s not how this works. You have your answer, now spin the bottle again.”

“But-” 

“Those are the rules, Scotty.”

Annoyed, Scott reached out to spin the bottle again, and Peter winked at you. You smiled at him in return, thanking him silently. You were smart enough to know they would bug you about it later but at least you were fine for now, with enough time to come up with some bullshit excuse before you got bombarded with questions.

“Y/n it’s your turn.”

Well, maybe not so much time.

You were taken out of your thoughts by Jean’s words, averting your eyes to the bottle in front of you. Fair enough, it landed on you. Such luck.

“Truth or dare?” Scott asked you, unable to hide a grin.

“Come on, Scott.”

“You gotta choose!”

“Truth?”

“Tell us how that kiss happened.”

“Dare.”

“I… dare you to tell us how the kiss happened.”

“That’s not fair-”

“Those are the rules,” Warren intervened, repeating what Peter had said earlier, and you shot him a death glare. 

“You know I could kill you right?”

“You like me too much,” he smiled, and you sighed. You considered leaving the game, but you knew they would just annoy you until you talked.

“Fine. It was nothing, okay? We were on a mission and we had to improvise, that’s it.”

Scott’s eyebrows were furrowed together. “Wait it was for a mission?”

“Yeah,” you confirmed.

“But then it doesn’t count!”

Warren chimed in again. “What? Yes it counts-”

You looked over at Peter while all your friends debated the validity of your kiss , but he looked confused. “What?” You mouthed to him.

“That wasn’t our first kiss,” he blurted out, as if that were the most obvious thing in the world, very clearly not thinking before he spoke. Everybody else went quiet.

Warren was the first one to break the silence. “First kiss? Wait, how many times have you kissed?”

“No- it was-” Peter tried to save himself, but it was way too late. Now they wouldn’t leave you alone.

“You have to tell us!” Kurt exclaimed, and you almost felt mad at him. Almost.

Peter cleared his throat. “It was uh- when we were kids? Cause I told you I’d never kissed anyone?”

“Oh but if the mission one doesn’t count then that doesn’t count either. We were like ten!”

“What, were you not a person at ten years old?”

“Come on our real first kiss was that night at the movies wasn’t it? With the… the werewolf movie.”

“No cause that was after the one at the diner.”

“No it wasn’t! It was that one, then the time in your basement, then the diner.”

“But it doesn’t make-” Peter stopped and looked around. 

“What?” You did the same, only to see your friends look like they’d seen a ghost. They were all wide-eyed, either looking at you and Peter or at each other, trying to process the conversation the two of you were having. Okay, so maybe you got a little carried away accidentally.

“Uh-”

And then chaos again.

“You’ve kissed how many times now?”

“Are you sure you’re not together?”

“We’ve been trying to get you together for months! Months! And you tell me this?”

“But we-” you started, but what were you really gonna say? You were the one to talk too much.

Peter stood up. “We… are leaving.” He held his hand up for you to take, and you did so, standing up too. In no time you were in his room at the school, and things were awkward.

You sat down on his bed while he sat down on the chair by his desk, both in silence for a while, neither sure what to say. It was pretty common for you to do that, ignore this kind of thing. As you’d just talked about, you’d had those kinds of moments quite a few times before, but you always ended up unspokenly agreeing to not talk about it after. But it seemed that this time there was no choice.

“Um so.”

He lifted his gaze from the floor to you. “Yeah.”

“I uh. I didn’t realize uh. How many times we’ve- you know.”

“Yeah.” He was fidgeting with his fingers, looking at his hands instead of at you. You were kind of thankful for it.

“You think they’ll be too annoying about it?”

“Have you met them?”

You laughed. “Yeah. Maybe we should have just not played the game.”

“I’m sorry. Or whatever.”

“For what?”

“For bringing it up. It just… came out, you know how I speak without thinking-”

“It’s fine. We’ve kissed a few times, so what?”

“Yeah. Right. It’s what friends do! Right?” He finally looked at you.

“Yes! Platonic friends kiss sometimes. It’s normal.”

“Yeah! Totally. Totally.”

There was silence after that. One that indicated how incredibly not normal it all was.

“Can I ask you something?” Peter blurted out, out of the blue.

“Okay.”

“Did you… like… kissing me?”

“What?”

"Huh?"  He pretended he hadn’t said anything, immediately regretting saying it.

Silence again.

You thought for a moment. “Yeah.”

“What?”

“I liked it. Did you not?”

“I don’t- I-” He stood up in superspeed, but stayed within distance from you. “Yeah. A- a lot.”

“Does that- I mean that’s still like. Normal right?”

“Yeah I mean who- it’s kissing right? Why would- why wouldn’t we like that?”

“Right. Right. Yeah, of course.”

“Would it be that bad?”

“What do you mean?”

“If we were like- you know- not… friends.”

You quirked an eyebrow, and his eyes widened. “Not like that! I mean if we were like, more.”

“Like… if we dated.” It was a statement, but a question too. Were you getting this right?

“Wuh- Yeah. I guess.”

You had no idea what was going on now. After a long time of getting teased by your friends to no end about the blurry lines of your friendship with Peter, you learned to scold yourself when you caught your thoughts drifting to that. After all, you couldn’t- it would just ruin your friendship, and you didn’t want to lose your best friend. 

But now here he was, right in front of you, asking you if it would be so bad if you dated.

…would it?

“Why?”

“You didn’t answer the question.”

“I just wanna know why you’re asking!”

“Well cause maybe I’d like it if we were dating!” 

“Yeah sure,” you let out a laugh.

“I’m.. not joking.”

You went quiet.

“I know I’m not serious about… well anything I guess,” he let out a small laugh, “but I’m being like 100%, totally for real with you right now.”

“So you have… feelings for me. That’s what you’re saying.”

“Yeah.”

“And you’re not joking.”

“No! Why would I joke about that?”

“We joke about that all the time!”

“Not right now!”

“You know I’m 100% kicking your ass if you are, right?”

“I… am pretty aware.”

“Okay.”

He looked at you expectantly, but you didn’t even know what to think about this situation, let alone what to say. 

“Okay? So?” Of course, this was still your Peter, extremely nosey and incredibly impatient.

You took a good look at him. Did you like him the same way he apparently liked you?

Peter was annoying. He was loud and a lot of times way too much, and he always ended up getting you into embarrassing situations. If you ever got in trouble, it was pretty safe to say it was probably his fault. He was stubborn and cocky and annoyingly good at making things play out his way.

But he was your best friend. And he was wearing his stupid silver jacket that matched his stupid silver hair and a stupid graphic shirt with a stupid bear that wore sunglasses on it and the stupid Star Wars pin that you gave him for his stupid fourteenth birthday. He was so utterly and completely stupid, and it was stupid to think this could work.

And maybe you were stupid too, because it seemed that you liked him, a stupid amount. 

“Okay, don’t get too cocky, now.”

He kept staring at you, expecting your next words. 

“I like you too.”

“As in... more than a friend?”

“No I’m actually friendzoning you.”

Finally he opened a grin, relaxing as he caught on to your teasing tone. Now that looked more like him. “Are you? That’s good. I was actually gonna tell you I changed my mind.”

“You did?”

He walked towards you, in a normal speed for once. “Yeah. I think we should stay friends.”

You nodded. “Yeah me too.”

“Friends kiss, right?”

“Platonically.”

“Yeah, platonically.”

You laughed at how ridiculous that excuse sounded now. “We’re so stupid.”

Hee shook his head. “I don’t know what youre talking about.” 

You didn’t have time to keep the joke going, as he finally pulled you closer and leaned in.

You’d kissed a good amount of times before, but this time was different. It wasn’t impulsive, and you weren’t going to regret it after. You wouldn’t have to pretend it didn’t happen when it was over, and you really, really liked the thought of that.

But, of course, you did live with your really, really nosey friends, who you hadn’t noticed had been standing by the door.

“You guys are so confusing!”

Okay, it would be really stupid to think you would ever be able to live this one down.

[. . .]

A/N: treating you guys to these cute little oneshots today past mars was such a cutie i was gonna say i miss her but i dont really

[coffee-and-tea-time]

𓏲 ๋࣭  ࣪ ˖ Out of the menu, still the choice ๋࣭ ⭑

Yandere! Shopkeeper x Willing! Reader

We finally got a winner! *Clap clap* if you want context, you can go here but it's not that necessary we think - the twins

This mf was really more hard to write that I expected but nevertheless we tried to match the energy of the seller pickers so at least it was really fun ngl - Coffee

It took us both a while to draft what we wanted to write for him since he's not a very expressive character and we wanted to try a more subtle approach. If you have any ideas or suggestions for any of them, let us know!! -Tea

Count word: 3.1k (new longest post for now)

Tw: yandere behavior, kind of flirty reader, stalking, kidnaping?, written in you/yours, overall soft yandere, gaslighting, drugging (this really still counts as soft yandere??? believe me, yes), light paranoia, clueless reader

Your eyes scan the papers in your hand, your mind still focused rather on the man that handed you them, sitting right across from him, more specifically, the comment he just murmured. None of the people he mentioned called your attention as much as himself did, perhaps he was more that he presented himself as? He seemed to know much more about you than he’s supposed to, so, was he a yandere as well? And if so, Why miss the chance to tease a potential yandere? 

"Huh, so you think I should go out more often?"

"Well, I'm just concerned about your vitamin D intake, that's all. You need more sun Dear, for the sake of your health"

He smugly smirks at you like he's saying obvious facts that you should already know about yourself… though his smirk falters, his lips pressing into a tight line as he rethinks his words, though it was too late to retract them, it was your time to shine.

"Oh? Then why not help me with that yourself? You seem to keep a good track of my time outside for some reason, care to explain yourself, Honey?"

You steal his previous smirk, it now decorating your lips, curving them upwards smugly as he seems to sink into himself, his pen flipping between his fingers as a nervous fidget, scanning your expression, seemingly trying to understand what you were attempting to do with these witty remarks.

“Dear, allow me to remind you, you came all the way here to have an obsessive partner after you walk out this door, I'm sure anyone in the list will love to fulfill the job, sadly, I'm not one of them, I'm deeply sorry if my previous comments left any space for this misunderstanding"

He seems to lifts up a wall between you and him with his formality as if attempting to keep things formal and cordial though his eyes tell a different story, his eyes, akin to a snake’s narrow slightly, scanning your features as if daring you to continue this charade; a sweet chill runs down your spine, which only widens your smile further.

"Ow, come on, there's no need to lie so blatantly to my face, you know exactly why I'm here, and for that I can also tell exactly what is happening here”

He huffs, his fingers running through his black hair, messing up his slick back hairstyle into something much more fitting to match with his semi-formal attire.

"As I just said, I'm not a yandere, let's stop this little game, Dear, I’m not sure how you arrived at this conclusion, little detective…"

Those gray eyes glare at you without even missing a beat, narrowing further to make a subtle warning: quit fooling around. Do you care? No, honestly, him staring down at you only serves to fuel your burning curiosity about the man.

"Fine then, at least answer me this, how did you know i don't go out much?"

The man scoffs as if the answer was as obvious as looking in a mirror.

"Come on now, you are chronically online, I just made a lucky guess"

… Gotcha

"My screen time is something even weirder for you to know for certain though, don't you think?"

A silence ensues, tension and realization thick in the air as his posture changes completely, from relaxed and smug to tense and anxious, he leans forward, eyes avoiding you suddenly, like he wasn't piercing you with his stare just a few seconds ago.

You let your question linger, knowing you won, knowing he had no way to protest your question seamlessly 

"... don't tell management"

It was now your turn to sigh. Perhaps he was being truthful and this was just a big misunderstanding. Maybe his “background check” on you wasn't something he was supposed to do ethically speaking, but something he felt compelled to do. Then again, they did have this incident with a fool attempting to illegitimately make a yandere harem. Perhaps it was time to let this go, you tried at least, but being overly pushy could get you kicked out and leaving empty handed wasn't something you were willing to do after finally finding the courage to enter the shop.

 "Well, I don't know, I choose Oliver"

You said, the smirk in your lips faltering into a soft defeated smile, shrugging as you chose someone at random, pointing blindly at the papers.

"He's already purchased" 

He counters your response abruptly, his tone still formal yet with an air of defensiveness. You wondered, if he was already purchased, then why show it to you at all?

"Damn, okay, then Lio…"

You quickly point again at a random profile, barely even reading the name then scanning his expression, his head shaking even before you managed to pronounce the name fully.

"Sorry"

He responded with a shrug, his shoulders relaxing as if the tension he felt before was gone.

You smile at him once again, well, thankfully you weren't just flirting with the wrong target.

"You’re doing this on purpose"

You announce, amused by the realization, a smile widening in your lips as one seems to simultaneously tug at the corners of his, a mischievous grin adorning his sly stare, those eyes bearing into yours like a wicked fox.

"You choose me, be loyal to your own decisions… though, really, don't tell management. I do maintain I'm not some sort of obsessed maniac, Dear"

That's the most suspicious thing a person can say in a yandere shop but you take it.

"I care next to nothing about management… so, it's a date?".

(...)

You leave the store, hands empty, but not really. You walk with an extra cheer in your step, you managed to get yourself a date with the seller of the damn shop, not one of the many names in those papers, but the shopkeeper, talk about a plot twist. 

And so you make your way back home, waiting for the time to arrive, the time in which you'd meet up with the man outside of work in a sweet little restaurant down the same street where the shop is located. As you get yourself ready, checking your outfit, double checking…triple checking, your mind drifts to your conversation with the seller and the way everything he said seemed to avoid each and every one of your questions skillfully. You managed to get his number with the excuse of arranging the meeting time and place, yet… that was all, you didn't even get his name, did you?. 

You are brought back to reality with the buzzing of your phone, a notification from an unknown number… though it was the sellers, how did he get your number? Sure, he gave you his, but he shouldn't have a way to contact you yet, that information wasn't even in the paperwork either since you never filled any forms out, you didn't purchase any of the yanderes. 

» “Hey, it's the shopkeeper”

You raised a brow at your screen, watching as the little dots bobbed up and down, indicating he was still typing another message

» “just checking if you're still up for this date you so boldly proposed. My shift is over” 

His texts are a little dry, yet you can feel the awkwardness from them already, he wasn't fooling anybody, he was nervous as hell. 

You quickly type up a response, resuming your teasing over text like you never left the shop and so you text back and forth until the time arrives and you leave your home, walking down the street to the restaurant he sent you the location to. Once you got there, amusement tugged your lips up into a smile. This man, acting so unapproachable, so closed off, was eagerly waiting outside the restaurant with that classic “I'm just looking at my phone” stance, but damn he looked good. 

He wasn't wearing that semi-formal suit from before, but rather a tight black shirt, jeans and a jacket. His hair was down and you had to admit, it looked way better that way. You check the time on your phone, you arrive just in time, you look relieved but can’t help but wonder how the seller managed to close up shop, go back home, change and arrive before you when his last text was just a few minutes ago telling you his shift was over.

“aw, you arrived early to meet me? It’s so cute how eager you are for someone who didn't even tell me his name”

You meet his gaze as you approach him with a playful demeanor, his smile still decorating his face as always.

He huffs, glancing up from his phone, his eyes crinkling in a mischievous grin. He pockets his phone and adjusts his jacket, leaning a little closer as he speaks

“Oh, Dear, you got it all wrong, i just got here, but, i must say…waiting would have been worth it, you look stunning” 

He said with a soft chuckle and you nudged his shoulder in response to his compliment, though as you nudge him you feel how cold his jacket is, of course he didn't wait for you

“Right, anyways, you know, it's only fair that I get your name. I know you so desperately want to seem all mysterious and shit, but i need to know who I'm flirting with”

You tease bluntly with a chuckle, he tenses up a little, looking away for a second, trying to disguise his blush by rolling his eyes at you.

“I suppose you could call me Jade…”

“Well, jade, pleasure to meet you”

You said trying to imitate his tone of voice as he guides the way inside the restaurant.

“Since I answered your question, it's only fair you answer mine, don't you agree?"

His gaze seems like he's taking notes of your every expression as he gently pulls a chair for you to sit on before he sits across from you.

"Are we doing a little bit of banter here? Huh, that's quite the contrary of what you been doing all day, but please, go on, I'm thrilled to know what you wish to know of me"

His eyes move to the menu, although you can say his entire focus was still on you… because of the fact he can't possibly read the menu when it's upside down.

"So, if I may ask… why did you choose to flirt with me when you came to the shop to get yourself a yandere?"

"Why not? You could say I went there to find someone that catches my eye, and jokes on you, my eyes were set on you the moment you opened that door to guide me into the store"

You restrain yourself not to giggle like a fool when the top of his ears turns red while he's attempting to keep his perpetually smiling facade, oblivious to his own reaction to your words.

"Then, do yo-"

His words quickly die on his throat as a waiter gets to your table, you didn't have the time to catch the small twitch of his eyebrows that lasted a second.

"Good evening, I will be your server for the night, what can I get started for you two?"

As you two order normally, you can't help but feel a sense of discomfort as the waiter always speaks focusing his eyes on you, but Jade doesn't seem to react so you dismissed it, you're only feeling weird because of the awkwardness of being on a first date, although you can't help but sigh faintly with relief after the server walks away.

"Well… anyways, since I replied to one of your questions, guess it's my turn!"

You said smiling, trying to brush off the weird feeling you just had, focusing on your task in hand: the date.

“so, why don’t you tell me a little about your hobbies?”

You gaze at him while his head tilts slightly, as if doubting if to reply or just dodge the question like the past ones.

“Well, they differ depending on the time, I’m the type of person that get a new one every once in a while but one that has stuck since high school is embroidery”

Honestly, you can picture it, he does seem like the type of person who enjoys calm classy hobbies, old lady hobbies if you will. The image is sort of endearing. 

"Since high school? Wow, what was your first piece?"

You feel relieved that he seems more open to conversation now that you both are formally on this date. Sadly for you and lucky for him, you focused so much on listening to his answers that you didn't catch the small blush dusting his cheeks.

"...It was a skull, edgy, I know. I really like how it turned out back then though”

“A skull? Very edgy indeed, why-”

Your question was left hanging in the air as an arm interfered with your vision of Jade, the waiter placing your plates on the table with a polite smile. The interjection was a little awkward, but there's not much you can do about it, the waiter is just doing his job.

Though as you lower your voice to a stop, interrupted by the waiter, you see the slight hint of annoyance in Jade’s face flick for a second just to disappear like it never happened, it makes you wonder if that was a hint of jealousy? It probably wasn't… your yandere rotten brain must be seeing things, right?

As you two indulge in conversation, enjoying your little date, you almost lose track of time. It feels like in the blink of an eye, the date was already at its final point, the only thing that popped your bubble was his phone ringing.

"...sorry, it's my boss, allow me to step out real quick, it won't take long I'm sure"

You nod to him before he makes his way to the restroom to pick up the call. Honestly you feel kind of sad that the dinner was reaching its end but well, you can't be that clingy on the first date.

As you ponder between when and where the perfect second date will be or if it's best to wait for him to ask for another, the waiter interrupts your thoughts, placing a glass of what looks like raspberry juice on the table.

"Excuse me sir, I didn't order this"

The waiter gives you a puzzled expression as if it were a competition who is more confused by the situation but is quick to giggle as if it was an inside joke of his before reassuring you.

"Oh, don't worry, it's already been paid”

You didn't have time to ask further questions when the busy server was already on another table that needed him, well, it looks tasty anyways, why reject something when it's free?

You honestly feel like luck is on your side today; you got the confidence to try and flirt with Jade and successfully get yourself a really good date! And you also get a free drink as a way to celebrate your little achievement, so you take a big gulp. 

Huh? Weird, you know the taste of raspberry by heart, why does it taste more bitter? Ugh, the fruit is probably not that fresh , even the consistency feels a little thicker too. Well, raspberry juice is supposed to be like that, perhaps you got too used to store bought and got yourself confused.

"Well, is not like a restaurant would sell 'expired juice' as their main drink, surely I'm just overthinking it" 

You reason with yourself in a whisper as you set the drink aside, ugh, maybe you drank too big of a sip, you start to feel like you got brain freeze or something.

(…)

“Dear, are you feeling well? Do you need to go to the restroom?”

The sound of his relaxed voice quickly fills your ears, your mind feels hazy but you nevertheless try focusing on him as he sits back down to the table, catching his expression changing from the usual laid back grin to a worried frown. You didn't even notice when he came back from his work call, not until he was right in front of you, it's like time passed while your brain was stopped, something wasn't good…

"Did something happen? Do you need a pain-killer? Did the food upset your stomach?"

The rapid fire questions overfill your already overwhelmed mind as his hands hold your shoulders before he places his forehead against yours to check your temperature and although you tried, your currently unstable self only managed to hardly mumble some words.

"I… don't know, I just drank that"

You focus your gaze on the glass of juice and he follows your gaze with a frown as if his laid back mask is cracked.

"the color is slightly off and ice is only floating up to the middle of the glass…"

Was there really something wrong with your drink? What was in there? How bad is it? What's going to happen to you? Was it the waiter? Was there someone in the restaurant you didn't see? Why is this happening today?

"Dear, focus on me, okay? Don't worry, you're fine, just dizzy, I will make sure you are okay, alright? Take a deep breath for me darling" 

Through your dizziness you watch as he moves skillfully and quickly, paying the bill as fast as he could to take you out of there, his arms tightly wrapped around you to steady your wobbly stance, guiding you out of the busy restaurant. It's almost as if you were drunk, which didn't make sense, you felt yourself slipping further out of your senses, sounds muffled and your vision blurry, your legs and hands feeling tingly with each step you took with his assistance. 

"Jade, I-"

"Don't worry Dear, I will take care of you, just trust me, alright?"

You can help but feel grateful that even in this awful situation, you managed to have someone so gentle and caring with you, but before you can try to babble a thank you, you feel your mind shut off like an old tv… don't worry, you are being taken care of, Dear.

He just wants to look after you, it would be so creepy if he left you unconscious at your place since he's not supposed to know your address yet, so, guess the only choice is him letting you crash at his apartment, it's fine, you will find yourself at home there, it's really cozy! 

. . .

Wait, did you really believe him? That's kind of hilarious, try guessing again.

sorry for any misspellings or weird sentence structure ❣

images from pinterest and divider by Tea ⚘

[baronessvonglitter]

The Morning After

Javier Peña x f!Reader

Word count: 2.7K

Summary: after a sex emergency, you call on your neighbor Javier Peña.

WARNINGS: 18+ Only! Mature and Explicit, talk of birth control failing, dom!Javier Peña, uprotected p in v sex, creampie, slut shaming, mildly dubious consent, biting, fingering, rough sex, dirty talk, no specific physical descriptions of reader besides that she's wearing a dress, no use of y/n

Author's Note: I have no shame.

JAVIER PENA MASTERLIST | FULL MASTERLIST

It's early when you knock on Javier Peña's door. He's dressed for work, looking like he's just about to head out, a cigarette already pressed between his lips and he answers your knock with a questioning glance, eyebrow raised.

"I'm sorry to bother you," you say, timid under his gaze. "But you did say I could come to you for help and.. well.. could you do me a huge favor?"

Peña glances at his watch. "A favor? What kind of favor?" There's a glimmer of mischief in his eyes, as if you're offering yourself on a plate to be his breakfast in bed.

You take a deep breath and exhale. "Could you give me a ride to the drugstore? It's kind of a time-sensitive issue."

He takes note of the way your hands flutter towards your stomach and he seems to catch your drift. "All right. C'mon then."

"Thanks," you whisper as he leads you to his car outside.

He's quiet as he drives, which is how you've typically known him to be in the past year as your across-the-hall neighbor. He only took notice of you when your boyfriend moved out a few months back and you exchanged quick good mornings or traded mail that was delivered incorrectly to each other. He saw you were alone and offered small, subtle gestures of kindness like offering to walk you to your car if it was dark out, or to simply keep an eye on your place if you weren't around. He'd tell you to stay safe, that the world is dangerous for pretty young women like you. He even said at one point that he would help with any favor, and now you're counting on him.

"May I ask what you need that's so urgent?" he asks, driving through the morning traffic.

"Medicine," you give him the short answer.

"What kind of medicine?"

"Medicine.. for women." You look out the window so he won't see your face turning red.

"Are you pregnant?"

You look at him, embarrassed. "God, no! But.. something happened last night and I just need to get the morning after pill."

He raises his brow as he keeps his eye on the road, flicks his cigarette out the window. "And what, exactly, did you get up to last night?"

You give him a strange look. "What do you think I got up to last night? Obviously I slept with someone."

He shifts uncomfortably in his seat. "Who was it? Someone you know? A date? A random hookup?"

It's so odd to see him flustered. It's such a departure from the calm, cool, collected man you usually see. "Why does it matter?"

A few moments pass where it's quiet between you two. Peña seems to be processing what you've said. "Did you use protection?"

You sigh. "Yes, but the condom broke. That's why I need the pill. Happy now?"

"The condom broke? What kind of cheap-ass condoms were you using?"

You scoff. "Are you really going to judge me right now? I've seen you come home with a different woman every night."

"That's entirely different," Peña snaps. "I use protection. I take every precaution when I'm with someone. And don't try to change the subject."

"Honestly, you're upset with me and it's weird.." but a part of you kind of likes his overprotectiveness.. dare you believe he's a bit jealous?

He runs his fingers through his hair, obviously trying to collect himself. "You were careless, bonita. For Christ's sake, I have a lot of things to worry about, but one of them shouldn't be if you're going to get knocked up by some guy you don't even know."

"First of all, he's someone I really like, and we've been out a few times. He's not 'some guy'. Besides, how do you know your own protection hasn't failed at times?"

It's his turn to scoff. "Believe me, mine has never failed. Because unlike you, I'm smart enough to keep an eye on the expiration date before I use it."

"Bullshit! Haven't you ever been so caught up in the moment that you just.. slip it on without thinking?"

He grits his teeth. You are really getting under his skin. "I may get carried away at times, but I've never been careless enough to put on an expired, low-quality condom. Stop pushing this argument."

"You? Carried away? Hell would freeze over." You cross your arms.

The drugstore still isn't in sight. "Carried away as in passionate," he corrects you.

"Define passionate." A playful smirk crosses your features, enjoying how uneasy Peña seems to be.

It's one thing for him to express himself physically and quite another to talk about it, especially with a woman. "I'm just a little more intense.. but I'm careful about it."

"Intense? How? This is the most interesting conversation I've ever had with you."

The fact that you've managed to fluster this man is really distracting you from your current emergency. "Well, I just really feel it.. I like to enjoy myself, but I also like to focus on making someone else feel good when I'm with them. I'm.. a little bit aggressive, a little bit demanding-"

"Holy shit!" you blurt out. "Got it." You turn away, blushing again.

"Is that what you wanted to hear? That I get a bit rough when I fuck?"

That word goes straight to your pussy, and the fucker knows it. He knows it. "I suppose I can see that about you. You look like the rough type."

He breaks into a smile, and damn it if you don't want to fucking straddle him in that seat. "You can imagine all you want, bonita. You haven't had the pleasure."

You do your best to ignore the feelings he's kindling inside you. You'd always found him attractive but until now hadn't thought about him as more than a neighbor. "Make a left up here," you tell him, hoping to put the issue to rest.

With a smirk he pulls into the parking lot and lets the engine idle. "You really can't wait to get your hands on that pill, huh?"

"The sooner the better," you shrug. "Do you need anything while I'm in there? Maybe some more condoms?"

Peña gives a small, amused laugh. "Actually, that's not a bad idea. Get me two boxes while you're at it, just in case." He winks.

You roll your eyes. "Wait for me, okay?"

"Sure thing, and don't rush, bonita. It's just some condoms. I'm sure you could use another pack yourself." He leans back in his seat as he watches you go into the store.

You're out five minutes later. "We have a problem," you tell Peña.

"What's the problem?" A frown appears on his face.

"They won't let me purchase the pill unless my 'husband' is with me."

"What kind of bullshit is that? Where the hell are we? Saudi Arabia?"

"Be nice," you try to calm him, though you're touched by how upset he is over a problem he has nothing to do with. "Just come in with me, okay? I need you."

Without a word he sighs deeply and shuts off the engine, getting out onto the sidewalk with you. You enter the pharmacy. "Just hold my hand," you whisper, and he grabs hold of yours. "You're sweating a lot," you mention.

"I'm fine," he mutters. As you approach the counter, Peña does a total 180 and puts his arm around your waist, giving your hip a gentle squeeze. It's not hard for you to play into it, as his touch sizzles through your clothes. You take a moment to realize how big his hands are, and once again your mind goes to a place you have no control over.

"See? You had me bring my husband in here, taking him away from his very busy and very important job as an agent in the Drug Enforcement Administration, just to help me get medicine that by law you are not legally required to withhold from me," you tell the pharmacist, an older man with an unpleasant face and demeanor.

"My wife and I got a little carried away last night," Peña pipes in, playing his part. With a smirk he presses himself to you, grabbing your ass with both hands and kissing you. You freeze for a moment at the shock of it, but your body reacts so naturally that you kiss him back, arms draped around his neck. His tongue gently pries your lips apart and you can taste cigarettes and whiskey in his kiss. Your panties dampen with unexpected desire and you have the urge to wrap your legs around his waist and let him take you right there against the plastic barrier of the drugstore counter, but a loud harrumph from the elderly pharmacist stops both of you.

"We're newlyweds," you explain, trying to catch your breath as Peña wraps his arms around you from behind. He kisses the side of your neck and nearly all rational thought leaves you. "We're still waiting for his vasectomy to heal." This little white lie earns you a pinch on the ass from him. You yelp. "We'll be purchasing several of these morning after pills."

Satisfied, the pharmacist give you the pill packets and you pay, swatting Peña's hand away when he tries to pay for them with his own cash. "You have 72 hours to take the pill to keep from getting pregnant," the elderly man tells you before you leave. "So you two have plenty of fun before then."

"We're going to have to get back home quickly, bonita," Peña tells you, and you have no doubt he's no longer in character. There's a rush of adrenaline shooting through you and you're both in a completely different headspace than you were before.

"My place or yours?" you ask, a little breathless as you exit the building.

He pulls you in for another scorching kiss. "Mine" he practically growls.

You're barely through his apartment door when he presses you to the nearest wall, lifting your leg and rubbing against you. "Fuck, look at this, you're already so wet," he murmurs, lifting your skirt and pulling your panties roughly down your legs. He stuffs them in his jacket pocket and his fingers go back to press inside you wet, waiting cunt. Two fingers slide in easily. "Jesus Christ, bonita, you're dying for it, aren't you?" You moan into his mouth as he kisses you, roughly pumping his fingers inside of you. Your knees go weak but he's there to hold you up, kneading your ass cheek with one hand while the other gets you ready for him. "Que sucia," he whispers roughly into your ear. "Such a dirty girl, sleeping with a different man each day, letting each of them come inside you. From now on I'm going to be the only one to come inside you, is that understood?" When you don't answer, he grabs your chin with his free hand. "Understood?"

"Ye-yes!" you moan, feeling helpless as he finger fucks you but refuses to let you come. Just when you think you're on that edge he takes it away. "You don't get to come yet, baby. You will only come on my cock, is that understood?" In response you clench around him and he groans. "Ah, fuck, you're tight. Your date last night must have been so small. I'm gonna fix that, and I'm gonna fill you up so you're leaking my cum for days, bonita."

"Turn around," he whispers gruffly, moving you anyway so you're facing away, your palms pressed to the wall. He removes your dress over your head and makes quick work of removing your bra. Cupping your breasts he kisses the nape of your neck and shoulders, leaving small bite marks where no one will see them. Each love bite is like a small fire upon your skin, which he laves with his tongue to soothe it. He can't keep his hands away from your ass: squeezing, rubbing, giving little spanks and smiling when you yelp in both surprise and pleasure. He's muttering things in Spanish that you can't understand, but from his tone you know it's praise. You hear his belt unbuckling, pants sliding down. Your pussy clenches in anticipation. He lifts your ass with one hand and guides himself to you with the other. All you feel is a delicious heat, the girth of him filling you up, stretching you. You gasp. He's gentle with the first few inches, and shoves forward without warning for the last few inches so that it takes your breath away. "Oh look at that.. all pink and stretched out around my cock. I bet your little boyfriend from last night didn't do this. I bet he laid on top of you and pumped for about three seconds before he came and left you having to run to me.." You're barely listening to his words, whimpering, mumbling 'please' and 'oh god!', concentrating on his cock, how it moves, how it fills you so that it's almost painful but Peña would never hurt you. His hands on your hips help him with steady strokes as he gets a feel for you, burrowing inside your channel with fluidity. "God damn, what a view," he mutters. "Your pink little ass and your pussy stretched so wide for me.. Listen to that, bonita," he quiets and lets the sound of your slapping flesh fill the room. You can't hold back, moaning and panting. "It's a fucking symphony," Peña curses, moving his hips faster. The new pace throws you for a loop and you're at his mercy, gasping with each deep, quick thrust. It's impossible to think of anything except what he's doing to you to make you come.

"Oh Javi," you moan, using his given nickname for the first time. "Please please please please!"

He grunts. "Please what, baby?" His hand snakes around to your front and you already know what's going to happen next.

"Please let me come, please let me come, oh god!" You squeeze your eyes shut tight.

"Dirty girl wants to come? Say it. Say you want me to fill you up, dirty girl." His voice is gravelly in your ear. "Say you want my cum inside you for the next three days."

You're barely able to breathe let alone form sentences. "Please... I want your cum inside me!"

"Inside where, baby?"

"In my fucking pussy! Blow your fucking load in me!" You're desperate, feral.

"Jesus Christ," he mutters, taken over by your own dirty talk, smirking because you're exactly the kind of dirty girl he thought you to be. "That's exactly what dirty girls say, baby. But you need to come first. I want to come when you do, and you'll see why." With that he placed his touch on your clit, rubbing in little circles until you're engulfed in tidal waves of pleasure. You're incoherent as you rhythmically clench around his cock, but able to register the way he swells right before he twitches, milked by you, releasing his cum and splashing his warmth deep inside you. God, it's such a primal feeling. And you keep rippling around him, small spasms that take forever to die away. Peña slumps against your back, holding you close with one arm. "Let me see, baby." He disengages, getting a good view of your wrecked pussy, already spilling out his pearlescent seed. He uses his fingers to push it back inside you, like something he's found to play with. He makes you stand, still holding on to the wall, watching his cum fall along your inner thigh and drip to the floor. "Let it all drip out of you, baby. There's more where that came from."

You stand, trying to catch your breath. His cum turns cold running in tiny rivulets down your thigh, but you like the feeling. It's almost sacred, in a way. And it's freeing. Thanks to your pills you are carefree for the next few days.

"Let's get you in the shower," he says, his voice gentle this time as he gently turns you to kiss your mouth. "Then we'll try out the sofa.."

You chuckle. "Aren't you already late for work because of me?"

"Fuck it. I can be a few hours late.."

dividers by @roseschoices 👑

[leaawrites]

Silence and Peace

Percy Jackson x fem!reader

Summary: Y/n doesn't like Percy very much, until one quiet night changes everything.

Warnings: use of Y/n, female reader, kinda suggestive, no specific cabin,

Wordcount: 1.8k

I'm back! If you have any requests or whatever, send them in! Though I might need a while to finish stuff right now :(

Btw, thinking of making a part 2 of this? What do you think?

Masterlist

In the quiet hours of Camp Half Blood, when all campers were asleep and nobody could disturb her peace, Y/n sat on the beach. Watching the waves crash against the shore longingly like they were her second home. She watched the ocean come and go. She watched the sand cover her feet and making her sink deeper every time a wave came to her. For her, that was freedom. Long hours of silence. A peace so immaculate nobody could blame her for it. Nobody could make her drown in agony in those moments.

Not even Percy Jackson, Son of Poseidon. The boy who watched her from afar one night and couldn’t look away ever since. He watched her helping other campers with a mesmerizing look in his eyes. One that screamed at everyone walking past, “that is gonna be my girl.”

And if she loved the ocean so much, she would love him the same, right? Wrong. She wasn’t his girl. She never even though about being his girl. He was always just Percy Jackson. The boy who bullied her for being older but still smaller than him. It wasn’t even that much of time between them. Seven months. Seven months was enough for him to make fun of her. Because Percy had no idea how to get a girls attention otherwise.

So that was his plan. Make her hate him if that was the only way for him to talk to her. Stupid boy.

Percy was stupid; you could ask about a dozen people and they would agree. He wasn’t dumb, but stupid. That kind of stupid that would get defeated by Annabeth after being distracted by a girl walking by. That kind of stupid that would stumble over his own feet when she approached him to complete her duties at camp. That kind of stupid that walked over to her one night and sat down next to her with nothing but static silence and the rapid sound of his heartbeat in his head. He was stupid in love.

“Why do you always watch the ocean but never go in?” He asked, scaring the girl and making her look at him wide eyed.

“I-” she began talking before shutting up. Every time she saw him, she prepared herself to get a snarky remark out of his mouth instead of a civil conversation. Though now he talked to her like a normal person. He talked to her like they were friends. “What are you doing here?”

Percy chuckled, averting his eyes from the moon towards her. Eyes sparkling, a kind of tiredness filling his face. “I don’t think you should be the one asking.”

It wasn’t meant mean. It wasn’t meant harmful in any way. However Y/n received enough comments with the same tone to roll her eyes and look away from him in annoyance. In her head, he wasn’t there to keep her company or even - dare I say - comfort. He was only there to annoy and tease her.

“Look, Percy, I was really enjoying my peace before you came, so maybe, would you be so kind, and leave me alone. Just this once. In the morning you can say whatever you wanna say to me, just not tonight,” she said, pulling her knees to her chest and letting her head rest on them, her voice tired and stifled.

Percy looked at the girl like she was going insane. Like somehow she murdered three people and wasn’t afraid for him to be the next. Which, Percy assumed, probably was one thought in her head at the moment. Even when he could never imagine her doing harm to anyone or anything. She was the smart, kind, classy girl in camp. The sweet, blooming field of flowers that everyone adored. Him included. He adored her.

“You know, when I’m seeking peace at night, I also visit the ocean,” he told her, making her look up at him. She was surprised he was still sat next to her, talking in tranquility. It felt foreign, yet normal in a fascinating sense to her. A person can be so different at night. Or was it only because he was at peace now? “Lately it felt like I visited a girl as well.”

It took her a moment, but then she understood what he meant. This wasn’t the first time he came here. It was, however, the first time he made himself known, which surprised her. When you think of Percy Jackson the first adjectives would be sarcastic, extroverted and brave not shy, calm and soft. At least not to her.

“You were watching me?” She asked, eyebrows furrowed in confusion and, what Percy assumed to be disgust, but actually it was surprise. Y/n was surprised that he seemed interested in her.

“I also like to swim, but that wasn’t possible since you occupied the ocean’s attention for most of the time,” he told her, sighing in acted sadness.

Y/n laughed at his terrible performance, making him smile in return. “You should’ve just walked past. I would’ve been gone in a second if I knew it was you.”

Something in that sentence made Percy’s heart drop. Maybe it was the face that she would’ve been gone. Or maybe it was because she would’ve been gone because it was him. Anyway, something about it made him uncomfortable in his own skin.

“You also could’ve stayed,” he told her, not looking at her, missing the soft smile and tender look dancing in her eyes. “Bet you wouldn’t have minded seeing me without a shirt.” There it was. The comment she waited for, combined with the smirk she knew all too well. Percy was terrible at flirting and she wouldn’t have said what she eventually did if they hadn’t been all alone at this hour.

“Maybe I wouldn’t have.”

Percy’s mouth stood open with surprise, while she shrugged nonchalant and bit her lower lip to suppress a laugh that wanted to escape her so badly. The boy wasn’t used to her actually jump on the joke and tease him back, though he couldn’t deny that he somehow liked it.

After a moment of thinking, he took his chance. Pulling his shirt over his head and making his way towards the water, he turned to her with a smirk. “Well, if that’s the case.”

Y/n wanted to watch the beach, she came specifically to this place to do just that. Watch the waves and the shore and the sky and the moon. Though now her eyes were focusing on something else. She watched Percy dip in the water, breaking the surface, with such gentleness, she wanted him to touch her just the same. She watched him swim for a bit. Watched him look at her and act like he was being attacked to get a laugh out of her. His head sticking out of the water to watch her reaction. When he saw her enjoying his company for once, he smiled back. It was nice knowing to be the reason for one’s happiness. Especially someone you wanted to make happy every day.

As he came back, Y/n tried to keep her focus on the moon, only betraying her quest when Percy sat down next to her again. Shirt still laying next to him.

Percy turned his head, only in time to catch her eyes traveling over his now shivering body. The night air hitting his skin with discomfort.

“You should put your shirt back on or you’re gonna get sick,” she said, looking at him. Her eyes catching a water drop sliding down his face and following it. He ignored her comment but still put his shirt back on.

“When you said that you would’ve gone if I was to just walk past and into the water, was that only because of me or would you have gone if any other person would’ve been in my position?” He asked her, making her look away from him again. She didn’t answer though Percy knew the answer now. “You don’t like me very much.”

“It’s hard to like you, when you constantly try to embarrass me,” she said, finally. Finally she didn’t just walk past him, ignoring his comments like they weren’t meant for her. Though it was obvious to everyone.

“I’m not trying to embarrass you,” Percy admitted. Grover was right, he thought.

After he finally told someone about his crush on the girl, Grover was quick to educate him that that wasn’t the way to get a girlfriend. “I was just trying to get your attention,” he admitted quietly.

Y/n laughed at that, her hand over her mouth. “Why would you want my attention?” She asked him.

“What?” Percy didn’t understand how that seemed so impossible to the girl next to him.

“Percy, be serious. You couldn’t possibly want my attention so bad. I mean, why would you? You have the attention of all the girls, why mine?”

Percy had never been so mad at himself and at her too. He wanted to tell her that he was just joking. He wanted to tell her that he had no idea why he wanted her. But the truth was he knew. He laid awake enough nights asking himself the same question. Then again, he was mad at her for thinking that. He was mad again at her that she couldn’t see all what he saw in her in herself.

“I like you, okay? I really do. I like the way you talk kindly to everyone and I like your smile and your cleverness. I like that you’re always there for everyone and that you listen to me even though I’ve been horrible to you,” he told her it all. Everything that he thought about he told her. “I like your bubbly personality and how you can’t seem to stand normal after staying up for a moment. I like how messy you are and yet put together. I like your face and your eyes and you. I like you for how you are.”

“Well, Jackson, your strategy isn’t really good. I mean, teasing a girl to get her attention usually just works in books,” she told him.

Percy couldn’t believe it. He just poured her a cup of his heart and she decides to dump it into the ocean.

“But this is nice,” she eventually added. “I like this side of you. The quite and vulnerable one. The one who’s flirty and sarcastic in a lovable way. The one who fakes his death to make me laugh.”

“What does that mean now?” Maybe she didn’t dump it all in the ocean. Only a part of it. The part she didn’t like.

“It means that if you show me more of that side, I could eventually start liking you too. Would that be alright?” She asked hoping for a yes and a agreement from him.

She got more though. She got a relieved ‘yes’, a promise and a smiling and blushing boy.

[shanastoryteller]

ROSES ARE RED, AND THIS IS BEDONKS
CAN I PRETTY PLEASE HAVE SOME PERCY AND TONKS 🌹💖

“What’s going on with Percy?”

Kingsley looks ups from his paperwork to find Amelia looming over him. Not exactly a common occurrence, since he’s well over a foot taller than her. “Brooks?”

“Merlin, don’t speak to me about Percy Brooks,” she says, pulling a face. She’s the one who brought him up! “Weasley.”

He blinks several times, rolling through Arthur’s children until he lands on the appropriate redhead. A bit uptight, considering his parentage, but Molly can fret with the best of them up until she gets fed up and settles matters with her wand. “I could get Tonks in here, if you want.”

“Do they know each other?” she asks in interest. “They were in different houses, and a couple years apart.”

How does she know that? He knew that, but it was against his will. “Tonks is dating him. Or trying? I’m not totally clear on the specifics despite her best efforts.”

He hadn’t anticipated how much work it would take for him to dodge a trainee determined to complain to him about her love life. It speaks well of her future in the field, at least. Or poorly of his own abilities, but he’s fairly confident in those, so he’s comfortable giving her the credit here.

“Great, a harassment case waiting to happen for our department,” she says dryly.

He rolls his eyes. “The only person he’s complaining about it to is Tonks. Who takes it as encouragement. Which, considering the cause and effect, it very well might be.”

“That’s what I’m talking about,” Amelia says. “What’s what this kid?”

Kingsley is lost again. “Can you get a little more specific?”

“Crouch’s department has become efficient, and dare I saw, effective over the last couple months. It’s certainly got nothing to do to with Crouch, since he’s been useless for nearly a decade. The only thing that’s changed is Percy. Who attends every meeting, claiming Crouch sent him to take notes, and then memos and policy get signed and sent out of Crouch’s office when I know for a fact Crouch is too busy harassing me to do his damn job.”

He tries to avoid the obvious answer because it’s the most ridiculous. “You think it’s him?”

“Who else?” she returns.

Well. “Do you… want me to arrest him?”

“What good would that do?” she demands. “The department is operating smoothly for once. I want to know what his deal is. Is he loyal to Crouch? Plotting against us? Just really passionate about bottom thickness?”

Not according to Tonks.

Uhg.

If he was alone, he’d bang his head on his desk until he’s unable to remember what Tonks’s voice sounded like and then maybe he’d know peace.

“Everyone’s got to start somewhere,” he says. “You’re noticing. Maybe that’s what he’s after.”

“I’m noticing because I notice everything. He’s taking significant steps to ensure people don’t notice. How’s he supposed to get promoted that way? Or transferred?” She shakes her head. “He’s doing it for a reason. Do me a favor and find out.”

Why can’t she ask him something simple, like hiding a body or burying evidence?

Now he has to spend his lunch break listening to Tonks talk about her not-boyfriend.

[batsythoughts]

As per the results of the poll, here is Yandere! Jason Todd with baby trapping! These are all going to be written as AFAB

Warnings: Possessive tendencies, manipulative behavior and actions, dubious consent (technically all will be), forced pregnancy (obviously), I don't really know what else to put. Let me know if there is more I should add

Smut under the cut. Minors please do not interact with this post

You and Jason had been going out for about 7 months when the whole thought had formed in his head

You had said that you and some coworkers were going to a bar nearby to get some bonding time away from work

Jason, being the loving and caring boyfriend, offered to go and make sure none of you had too much to drink

He mostly wanted to go and make sure your coworkers are good enough people for you to spend time with

Your time was precious to the both of you, and he didn't want it to be wasted on anyone who wasn't going to be good for you

You both got to the bar before your coworkers, so Jason left you to get the first round of drinks while he quickly went to the bathroom

It didn't take him more than 8 minutes before he came back out

He stopped in his tracks as he saw some guy standing beside you as he attempted to flirt with you

Jason could see you trying to politely end the conversation from where he was. Why you think of flirting back when you had him to take care of you like you deserved?

Jason came walking over and wrapped his arm around your waist. Innocently leaning in to place a kiss behind your ear while asking who your new 'friend' was

The guy looks Jason up and down with a scoff as he pushes off the bar. Making a comment you leading him on and he would wait for when you changed your mind under his breath while walking away

Jason glared at him as he held you closer. Gently guiding you to a booth in the corner after your coworkers finally showed up

Jason didn't pay attention to the conversation as he stared the guy down from the other side of the bar

The grip on his glass gets tighter as he watched this guy talk with his buddies while gesturing in your direction

Jason smirked as he made eye contact with the guy, enjoying the terrified look on his face

Tilting your head to face Jason, he leaned in for a deep kiss. Drawing out the action for a few seconds before pulling away to glance back at the guy. Proud of himself when the guy looks away and stops talking

You lightly push Jason while saying not to do that in public

But the bashful smile on your face when he looks back at your face tells him that you enjoyed it just as much as he did

Your coworkers laugh while joking about getting that kind of affection from their significant others

The rest of the evening goes by quickly with a couple of drinks in everyone's system as 10 o'clock comes rolling around

Jason gently guides you back into your shared apartment, his hands resting on your hips to keep you from stumbling

He carefully changed you into your sleepwear before making you drink a glass of water and have a small snack before putting you to bed

After making sure you were sound asleep, Jason goes to the bathroom to begin his nightly routine

His blood boils as he thinks about what that guy had said to you

How dare anyone think that you would ever be available again when you had Jason? He was the one that was going to be with you until the end of your lives!

He tried to think of a way that could make it clear that you were Jason's and he was your's till death do you part

He begins to pull his vitamins out of the medicine cabinet while he brushed his teeth. A low groan sounding from him as a few different medications fall out by accident

He begins to put each of them back in their space when his hands stop as he stares at one specific medicine

Your birth control pills

He looked them over as he noticed you still had half a month left until you would need a refill. Hell, it looked like your doctor would need to write you a new prescription when this was gone

The gears in his head turned as he had an idea formed in his head

After all, no contraceptive is truly able to prevent pregnancy entirely

Looking back into the bedroom through the bathroom door, Jason watched for a moment as you slept

He knew that the two of you would be together for a long time to come. You were the one that he was planning to settle down and have a family with, and he was certain you felt the same way.

Would it really be so bad if he just made the process go by just a bit quicker than agreed upon?

Finishing up in the bathroom, Jason changed into new underwear and a tank top before slipping into bed

Wrapping his arms around you, he lightly kissed your cheek as he whispered that he would make sure everyone knew you were his

The next couple of days went by normally as Jason slowly began to get his plan set into motion

He got a few placebo birth control packs that looked basically similar to the ones that you had

When you called in to get the refill and the new prescription, he offered to go and get it for you so you didn't have to worry about it after you got off of work

When he went to grab it, he began to go over the explanation for the new packaging in his head for when you did get home that night

He smiled when he got back and expertly opened the box and switching out the real birth control with the placebos he had gotten for you

Jason put the box back together as he threw the birth control in the trash to take it out so you wouldn't find it by accident

When you got home, Jason went up to you to give you a loving kiss as he began to ask about your day

He listens with interest as you tell him about all the drama that had happened with all your coworkers

At one point you did look at him while asking if he remembered to get your pills

He grinned while saying he did. Pretending to remember the pharmacist had said that the brand of birth control had changed looks but it should still work just as well

Jason begins to get into your space while placing kisses and nips at the skin of your neck as you stand in the kitchen to figure out what to do for dinner

You laugh while leaning into his touch, asking him what had gotten into him so suddenly

Jason smiled as his hands roamed down your body, resting on your stomach for a moment before beginning to undo the buttons of your pants

"Can't a guy just want his beautiful girl? I just want to show just how much I love you."

The truth though was that he was already getting excited of the thought of you becoming pregnant in the next few months

Jason could barely contain himself as he celebrated the last night you were on the birth control by fucking it out of you

Jason still had to be patient with his process as he waited for the medicine to make its way out of your bloodstream entirely

He did research to figure out ways to try and make a successful pregnancy happen: positions to try, making healthier foods to prepare your body for the changes, symptoms to look for after the attempt of trying

Each time you called in a refill, Jason would go and 'pick it up' for you so you didn't worry about it

After about four months, Jason finally decided it would be a good time to finally begin to putting the last part of his plan into action

He had been tracking your cycle thoroughly over the past months, so he knew which night that you were ovulating

He had put together a small movie night while also ordering some of your favorite take out before starting his strategy

He even drew a small bubble bath for you to soak in after you got off of work while he got everything set up for the night

As you were in the bathroom, Jason double checked everything to make sure that it would work out in his favor, hopefully

With the both of you in comfortable clothing, the TV plays the movies that he had picked out to help set the mood

You laugh while eating the food he got, occasionally sharing bites of the others food

Jason's lips would land on your skin every once in awhile as he begins getting excited for what was going to happen in the next few hours

When the food was gone, Jason went to the kitchen area again as he threw the trash away and the silverware in the sink

He let out a deep breath to compose himself as he looked over at you. His heart racing as he gently palms his growing erection before going back to the couch

He let the movie continue in the background as he gently rubbed his hand over your thigh

He smiled as he watched the screen to try and hold out for a bit longer before going on with his plan

Eventually his eagerness outweighs his patience as his hand slides up your thigh

Jason gently nudges your cheek with his nose. Smiling when you look at him before he begins to kiss you

The small sigh that comes from you strokes at Jason's ego as his fingers slip past the waistband of both your pants and underwear

His fingers circle your clit carefully as he continues to kiss you lovingly

His gentle actions get slightly more confident as he gladly takes in the soft moans that you let out

Jason pulls away from your lips as he feels your thighs begin to tense up, smiling to himself as he draws out the first of many orgasms for the night

He rest his head against yours as he slowly moved his fingers down as be used them to fuck you through your orgasm and into the next one

"That's a good girl. You gonna keep taking what I give you like the good girl I know you are?"

Jason expertly pulls two more orgasms from you before he finally let's up. Kissing you gently before guiding you to the bedroom to get on with his plan

He eagerly tugged of your clothes before laying you down on the bed. Staring you down as he stripped his own clothes off

Opening the nightstand drawer, Jason reached in and pulled out a box of condoms

Jason opened it before cursing while tossing it back into the drawer

You sit up slightly while asking him what was wrong

He said he forgot to restock on condoms since the last time you all got intimate

It wasn't a complete lie though. He had known that he ran out the last time, but he had planned to run out for this moment before he had to restart the process again with the next box

He took a few deep breaths while saying it would be fine and he could go calm down with a shower and then you both could continue with the movie night when he was done

Your chest heaved slightly as you looked at him from the bed. Looking him over while thinking over your options.

"It's just one night. I'm sure it will be alright to not use a condom one time."

Jason smiled as he double checked, even though he knew the answer would stay the same

You were his special love after all. Always so eager to please him no matter the situation it would put you in

Or in this case, the situation he would be putting in you starting tonight

He didn't give you a chance to rethink the decision before climbing onto the bed

Grabbing one of the pillows, he flipped you over and placed it under your stomach

This was a normal position for Jason to put you in, he always did when he was feeling extra intense that night

How thankful he was that he didn't have to worry about explaining why he was doing it tonight

He had read somewhere in his research that it could increase the chances of getting pregnant and how he was so hopeful it would work

Jason rests one hand on your thigh while the other goes to your back while gently pushing you into the bed

He carefully pushed into you with a deep sigh, his nails digging into your skin at the feeling of you clenching around his cock

Jason starts out by slowly pulling out halfway before sinking all the way back in. Keeping that pace with a low moan as he lightly pulled you to him with each thrust

He didn't want you to get overstimulated so quickly into the night by simply railing you into the mattress

Despite how good Jason was feeling, he couldn't help but feel that something was already off

Looking towards your face, he quickly noticed you biting the fabric of the pillow your head was resting on

Oh, that wouldn't do at all

The hand on your back slid up to reach around and grasp at your throat. Softly tilting your head up as he leaned onto your back to whisper in your ear

"I thought you were being my good girl tonight. Cause last I checked, good girls don't try hiding the noises they make."

To emphasize his point, Jason pulled out before harshly pulling you back to meet his hips

The startled whine you let out vibrated under his hand made Jason smirk as he placed a condescending kiss to your cheek

"Just like that. Now don't make me have to tell you to be good again."

With that, Jason leaned back up while resting both hands on your hips

This time he used his grip to pull your hips back to meet his, never once speeding up on the original pace he set

He let out a light groan when he felt you push against his pelvis each time he pulled you back to him

Jason could tell you were getting closer to another orgasm by the way your walls started to clamp down on his cock

He slipped a hand down to rub your clit in small circles. His own need to find release rising steadily as he rocks his hips against yours

Jason bit his lip as he pushed his hips flush to yours as he finally came. Your own orgasm following close behind as let out a soft cry

Normally, Jason would bask in the after haze of both of your orgasms, but tonight was different

Tonight he was on a mission as he slowly began grinding against you

Jason shushed your whines as you said it was too much

He leaned back down kiss along your neck as he let out a small moan at how you still were spasming on his cock

"Come one, baby. You got one more in ya. Just one more tonight. Come on, baby. For me, please."

Lord, how could you say no to such a reasonable request from your dear boyfriend?

Soon, 'one more' turned turned into a two hour session with Jason coming inside you 5 more times

He littered kisses along your neck as he gently rolled you onto your back. Mumbling praise of how well you did for him while slowly standing up

Going to the kitchen and bathroom, Jason made sure to have you drink some water before wiping you down with a warm cloth

He smiled while watching you fall asleep from the intensity of your love making session

He was extra gentle in the area of your crotch so he wouldn't wipe every bit of his cum

He knew both of you were clean so the only thing to worry about was the night he would eventually get you pregnant

Jason kissed the crown of your head while whispering that he would help you with a shower in the morning before making you breakfast as a reward

Jason made sure to pay extra attention to your behaviors over the next couple of weeks

You didn't show any regular signs that you were pregnant with what he had looked up in all his research

The only thing that matched was the fact you would get headaches when you got home from work, but that wasn't too unusual from the normal

It was over a month since that night and Jason was worried that he would have to wait another couple of months to try again

He was currently finishing up making some spaghetti for dinner as you sat on the couch while on the phone with one of your relatives

He quickly called out saying that it was ready while you smiled at him with a small nod

He watched as you stood up as your voice trailed off while trying to say good bye

Jason's heart plummeted as he watched you drop your phone and fall to the ground

He rushed over while checking you over for any injuries from the fall

You blinked up at him while taking a few deep breaths as you regain your bearings

Jason quickly grabs your phone while saying you would call back later before hanging up

He quickly helped you get up while saying you were going to the doctor to get checked out

His mind raced as he helped you to the car and began driving to the nearest walk-in clinic from your apartment building

He worried profusely as he quickly got you checked into the waiting room

He paced in the exam room as the two of you waited for the doctor to come and check on you

When she finally arrived, Jason and you both explained what had happened in detail while she listened to every worry

She quickly suggested that you do a quick blood and urine tests to see if they couldn't figure out what could be wrong

Jason held your hand when you gave the vial of blood and waited outside the bathroom door in case you would need him

The two of you sat in the room as you both wondered what could be wrong with you with genuine concern

When the doctor came back in, you both stared at her as she sat down in her chair with a smile

"We did a few quick test and found what caused the fainting spell. You're pregnant."

She continues to go on about how you probably had low iron due to the new life growing inside of you

Jason gave a breathless laugh as his mind finally calmed down

He had actually done it. You were pregnant with only one try from him

You quickly stammered out that you were on birth control and that it should be almost impossible for you to be pregnant with how religiously you took the medicine

The doctor shifts while saying that while it unlikely to get pregnant, it wasn't impossible even with so many precautions on either sides part

She quickly began giving the two of you the options that could be taken for carrying to term or a few other clinics that could help with a termination and mediation you would need for either option

Jason had to hold his tongue at the suggested of an abortion. He couldn't scare you into this by saying that was not happening before you thought about it.

Besides, he knew you would come to the right decision in the end no matter what you said at this moment

He held your hand while asking what you wanted to do with the whole baby situation

You were silent for a minute as you bite your lip. Squeezing his hand while looking into his eyes before giving a small nod with a shaky 'okay'

Jason smiled as he returned your nod while looking back at the doctor while listening to all her suggestions on the medicines you would be put on to getting in touch with a couple of OBGYNs for who you would want to be the doctor you would have for the baby

Jason felt over the moon while driving back to the apartment. One hand resting on your thigh as he thought of the next few months that would come

He made sure to keep you steady while getting you back to the apartment

He began talking about some things you would need to do for when the baby would arrive as he reheated the spaghetti

He looked up to look at you to see you aren't in the room anymore

He waited as you came out from the bathroom with 'birth control' packet he had picked up just last week

He watched as you threw it in the trash with a huff before looking at him again with a smile

Jason returned it as he leaned in for a kiss while rubbing his hand over your stomach

He quickly pulled away to kneel down on the ground while lifting your shirt up

You laugh while asking what he was doing

He smiled up at you before placing a soft kiss just above your bellybutton

"Kissing the two most important people in my life."

He wouldn't forget the small twinkle in your eyes as you looked down at him

He got back on his feet before getting you a plate of spaghetti to eat. Adamant that you needed to eat everything to properly feed the baby as well

The night continues on with small chatter of plans for a nursery and telling everyone the big news

Jason couldn't help the proud smile on his face as the night continued on

He had done it. You would now have a reminder that you were meant to be with him for the rest of your life. That now every guy knows they couldn't ever stand a chance of being with you like Jason was.

He gently kissed you again while wondering if you would potentially get on birth control again after the baby was born

Oh well, it's not like 'accidents' can't simply repeat themselves later on in life

The next few weeks, Jason slowly gets to share all the information that he researched with you with the excuse of looking it up after finding out you were pregnant

He had even started to buy those corny parent shirts online and wore them any chance he got

He would smile every time you both went out and older couples would always congratulate the two of you if they happened to notice

He was so happy when your bump finally began to show. He would always have at least one hand on you at all times

He moment he felt a kick for the first time, hearts appeared in his eyes as he looked at you in awe

The best thing to happen in public was one day you were just grabbing a few things at the store for snacks along with a couple of onesies that Jason thought were absolutely adorable

You were getting to the six month mark so it was beginning to get a bit harder for you to lean down like you once had

He was wait for you to decide which can of fruit you were going to have he grab when he looked down the aisle

Jason immediately recognized the guy from that night in the bar looking at you with a smirk on his face

The smirk quickly fell when he meets Jason's cold glare

You didn't even notice the attention as you pointed to a can on the very bottom at the back

Jason didn't miss a beat as he leans down to grab the can for you. Placing a soft kiss on your bump as he stood again

Jason wrapped his arm around you as you began to walk down the aisle to see if there was anything else you needed

Jason continues to glare the guy down with his own smirk. Bringing his hand up to drag his thumb over his neck

The guy became startled as he rushed out of the aisle from the clear threat from your 'protective' boyfriend

Jason smiled as you continued to guide him through the last few aisles before going to check out

This would definitely be one of his personal favorite moments that happened in public during this pregnancy

Because it was just proof that you were always going to be his for as long as you both breathe

[akutasoda]

hi hi ml!!! we’ve only recently become moots but i hope you dont mind me joining your event 🫶‼️ if star rail is still open, wb boothill & aventurine !! with general domestic stuff !! specifically cooking or baking with him ;; i wonder how that would go

also thank you again for the opportunity 💕💕

a life with you

synopsis - a domestic lifestyle with them

includes - aventurine, boothill

warnings - gn!reader, domestic stuff, fluff, slight angst at the start, slight crack, teasing, wc - 675

a/n: hii ren! don't mind at all <3

aventurine ★↷

↪a domestic setting to aventurine is something to be treasured with your loved ones. he loved his family and he still does but now after all this time, the person he gets to experience domestic bliss with is you.

↪to him, being with you in that domestic style is one of the only places where he can show his weaknesses. it's just you and him so if you've made it this far with him he trusts you enough to show his most vulnerable side.

↪it would be a change of pace compared to his life as one of the stonehearts but a very welcome change. he'll let himself indulge heavily in the moments of peace with you as he knows that being with you is the closest thing he can get to being safe.

↪due to being a stoneheart, he is prone to being sent across the galaxy quite often and with you in his life he does try and get back to you as quick as possible. alot of the time he gets back late as well so doesn't encourage you to wait up for him but if you do, his heart melts so much.

↪once he gets really comfortable with you, you can start seeing him become more open and honest with his words and actions. he likes to embrace you whenever he can and sometimes catches himself unconsciously searrching for your figure even if you're right next to him.

↪maybe has some cooking or baking skills but would be extremely limited - very open to learn however and whether it's out of genuine interest or just an excuse to be with you is up in the air. very willing to help you anywhere and so cooking or baking is no exception.

↪would be a surprisingly good baker/cook. it takes him a little while to get into it but when he does he becomes very efficient. no accidents would occur when you two cook or bale together and whatever you'd make would turn out very good.

boothill ★↷

↪a galaxy ranger, a bounty hunter, a cowboy. boothill was many things, constantly moving around to chase his next target - he didn't live for himself afterall. he never settled in one area for too long and so domestic activities were irrelevant in his life.

↪he probably had a higher probability of experiencing domestic activities when he was human but definitely not as a cyborg. he just doesn't have time for such trivial things that wouldn't give him the homeliness that it would to anyone else. or so he thought.

↪you made alot of things that seemed pointless to his cold metal body worthwhile. he may not be able to feel the same feelings he used to but atleast with you he could fully convince himself that he could. so that domestic feeling becomes real to him.

↪ it's never really a dull day when boothill's around, although if you asked him he'd tone down his slight hyperactive mind. he isn't that energetic at home but he can get very loud and annoying sometimes especially when you knwo he's trying to tease you

↪he's very touchy both in and out of a private setting, sometimes tones it down if you aren't really a pda type. while he may not be able to feel you under his cold fingertips he can instead feel a comfort in knowing nobody would dare mess with you when you have him practically slumped on top of you. also is a massive bed hogger - you have to fight him for even a slither of the bed.

↪cooking probably isn't one of boothill's strong suits. whether or not he actually need to consume food is unknown - he probably doesn't but because he does have a human face he probably can still taste. however he'd gladly entertain you if you wanted cook or bake with him.

↪ absolutely no help whatsoever. most likely does not know how to cook or bake but would insist he does just to nearly set things on fire. if you really wanted him to help you probably have to distract him by telling him to hand you ingredients or stir things but then he'd insist to help - do you think he could pull up recipes in his mind?

akutasoda's 1k event

[poorly-written-fiction]

talking in your sleep || logan howlett x reader

part 2 for anyone interested

A/N: hello i threw something together very quickly inspired by "talking in your sleep" by the romantics! also reader is gender neutral (i'm pretty sure i was good to not use any gendered language??? one mention of they/them pronouns) no use of Y/N or any specific descriptions of you, the reader, aside from logan being taller than you. unrelated to this fic, but "replay" is continuing and i am already working on my next long fic after it is done! next chapter of "replay" goes live tomorrow.

summary: you make it a point to not interact with logan, but he finds an interesting excuse to talk to you.

notes: somewhat suggestive themes, proceed with caution

No one could understand what your problem was with Logan. He’d walk into a room, and if you weren’t immediately turning on your heels and leaving, you suddenly became a brick wall. You would watch him, tracking his every move. He’d notice you watching him, and you’d roll your eyes and turn away. Everyone knew he wasn’t easy to get along with, but the way that you would change the moment he was in the same vicinity, it seemed like he had murdered your family. Your friends would ask “have you talked to him?” and you’d reply with a very short, sharp “no.” Everyone at the mansion was stumped, what was it about Logan that bugged you? Scott had asked Jean if she would get into your head and check, to which she’d reply, “And risk them treating me the same way? Absolutely not.” They didn’t dare to ask Charles if he would do the same. He wouldn’t, simply out of respect for your privacy. It was a mystery to everyone, but it didn’t bother anyone more than Logan himself. He would never admit it, but he was genuinely concerned that he had hurt you in some way and wasn’t aware of it. He even knew he was a dick, even on a good day, but he had no real reason to dislike you directly. You iced him out first, and he gave up trying to fix anything after you would constantly shut him down. The closest he could get to you was that his bedroom was right next to yours.

Your sleep schedules were drastically different, you often fell asleep before he did. Based on how closely he could hear your breathing when you slept, he could only imagine that your bed and his shared a wall. He didn’t actively listen to you, but he couldn’t help that he had heightened senses. He could hear you turning over in your sleep, occasionally groaning or mumbling. He had learned pretty early that you tended to talk in your sleep. Never anything super coherent or interesting. Usually only a few words, or a sentence that didn’t make any sense. Occasionally he’d hear you say something funny and he’d chuckle to himself. He silently wished he could have a real conversation with you. He had heard that you were easy to talk to. What had he done to make you push him away? 

One night, Logan was sitting in his bed, reading a book and sipping on some whiskey. He didn’t always spend his evenings like this, but occasionally he would indulge himself in some peace. Stop thinking about the world and all of its problems, and let himself enjoy life’s simple pleasures. He was working his way through “And Then There Were None” by Agatha Christie when he heard you stirring in your sleep. He paid the sound no mind until he heard something familiar.

“Logan…”

He perked up immediately, setting his book and glass down on his bedside table. He sat in complete silence, his breathing slow and quiet waiting to see if he could hear it again.

“I want you, Logan…”

He practically jumped out of his bed. What were you dreaming about? Him, obviously, but what was going through that head of yours? He was dying to know. He hoped that you thought better of him in your sleep. There was the sound of shifting and rolling over in your bed, and then the stillness and quiet again. Your breathing still sounded like you were asleep, otherwise, he would have gone and knocked on your door. He thought about it for a moment, confronting you at your bedroom door tomorrow morning.

The idea became reality. Logan could hear you going about your morning routine, and he did the same, taking extra care to make himself look a little nicer than usual. He wanted answers out of you, and he wanted to look good doing it. He heard you walking towards your bedroom door, and he practically ran into the hallway, leaning over your doorway as you were walking out. You gasped immediately when you saw him towering over you.

“Good morning, how did you sleep?” You were at a loss for words, completely taken aback by the situation. Logan smiled, “Did you have any nice dreams?” With those words, heat was rushing from your chest and rising into your neck and face. He had you caught.

[quitealotofsodapop]

So how does courtnapping work??

"Courtnapping"; a mix of "courting" + "kidnap", is basically the demonic version of a proposal.

When demons were still scattered clans/prides across the mortal realm, it was very difficult for clans to interact without a lot of violence involved. Either because of competition for food, or because someone mistoke a glamoured demon for a mortal animal and starting biting.

What's a prospective lover to do if their beloved's family won't let them near without a fight? Easy; steal their lover away so that they can court them (among other things) in private.

As society grew; "courtnapping" became part of the demonic consciousness as a legitimate dating strategy. It was a loud way of announcing your intentions to the intended's family that you wanted them as a mate, whilst also showing off some muscle/magic.

However, demons are not animals. And if the kidnapped party rejects their captor's affections, it is considered polite to let them go. Only *uncouth* demons dare to lock their beloved away without contact with their family. And only truly vile ones (like Kui Mulang or Sai Tai Sui) keep them as forced spouses.

It's downright expected that a demon whisks away their future spouse - after all, who doesn't want to be swept off their feet?

Among wealthier Underworld clans who've adopted celestial/mortal practices, courtnapping isn't as common. Imperial China-style arranged marriages were the norm for the longest time up until a certain Bull Prince fell in love with an Iron Fan warrior, changing the desire among noble demons towards love matches. Courtnapping is considered a legitimate way of declaring "I object!" to an arranged marriage by giving the bride/groom a second option and a moment to rethink the arrangement.

Some wedding parties even hold a mock courtnappings between the new couple so that they can run off from the festivities and enjoy their honeymoon. Think how Spartan weddings involved the groom "kidnapping" the bride from their own ceremony.

Also because of some hilarious idea sharing with @soniclozdplove, we agree; People were kidnapped by demons so frequently in the Imperial era, not because of demon's eating them - but because of *marriage fraud*.

Think of it like this:

China is under strict Confucian and filial piety ideals. If your parent wants you to marry a specific person, you have pretty much no say in the matter.

Unless.

You just so happen to be kidnapped by a demon who wants to keep you as their legally binding spouse.

Human: "Oh no~ I'm captured by an hunky demon who wants to marry me! Guess I'm going to have to stay here and miss out on my arranged marriage." ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Demon: "And we can no-fault divorce at any time!" Human's Family: "We'll just take them back!" Lawyer: "Actually you can't. It's a legally binding marriage. Unless the captive expresses their rejection or wants to leave; it's legitimate." Human's Family: "Crap. Well, we'll just hire a mercenary or warrior to reverse-kidnap them back!" (*Later...*) Mercenary: "Avast foul demon! I have been sent to reclaim your stolen bride/groom!" Demon, turns to "captive": "Yay or nay, hun?" Human, looks at mercenary: "Ew. Nay. He's older than my dad." Demon, turning on dramatics: "LEAVE THIS PLACE YOU SOLIDER OF FORTUNE! ONLY ONES WITH PURE HEARTS SHALL TAKE THEM BACK!"

Heres a PortSherry comic I feel is very appropriate.

In more serious scenarios, a courtnapping can be faked to safety remove a person in an abusive home. Abusers can't control you if you're behind a giant lumbering demon with a prenup.

DBK got into this in the Tang-era when he and Princess Jade Face were "married". He was just helping her claim her inheritance, since her dad's will would only pay out if she was married (the Underworld Earth-Fox Clan are the "mimicking human/celestial"-trends types). PIF knew of this arrangement, but was still jealous af and nearly blew the whole of Thunder Mountain in her rage (it was how they learned she was pregnant with Red Son).

Zhu Bajie is an odd duck in this case; since he married Gao Cuilan the normal human way, but his instincts told him to steal her away when her family suddenly became hostile towards him. Cuilan didn't really object because she truly loved him, but was upset that contact between her and her family was cut. Even after the couple are legally divorced; Bajie still considers Cuilan his wife - because in a demonic sense, she's still his willing mate. Lots of stories written about the Pilgrims post-Journey have Bajie go back to her so that they can (in human sense) remarry.

Courtnapping still occurs in the modern day; just with a lot of pre-arranged consent involved. Racing, mock-battles, and the spat with between the lovers' parents - demons do love the thrill of the chase after all. But unplanned kidnappings of desired spouses do still happen.

In Red Son and MK's case; they've accidentally been courting each other for a long time. Mostly because they're dorks who don't realise what their rivalry looks like from the outside - especially during the Season 1 era.

Red Son, showing off his plans: "Here is my current brilliant idea for reclaiming our power! Step 1; We engage Noodle Boy and his friends in battle. Step 2: While you two are occupying Dragon Girl and his fathers, I capture Noodle Boy. Step 3: I keep him hidden in my old base in Fire Wind Cave. Step 4: I have full access to the Staff and all of Noodle Boy's magical abilities! It's foolproof!" DBK & PIF: (*share knowing smiles*) PIF: "Dear, I'm glad that you've finally developed an interest in romantic matters - but our current goals do not align with planning a marriage just yet." Red Son, confused: "Huh?" DBK: "And while it would be advantageous if you married Sun Wukong's heir, I feel that tensions between our families are too high to consider even a superficial union." PIF: "It's really sweet that you considered it though." Red Son: (*turns back to planning board, realises that his plan to capture MK resembles a traditional courtnapping*) Red Son, nearly magenta from embarrassment as he tears up the plan: "Err... never mind then."

In season 3 when Red Son saved Mei, Sandy, and MK from the dessert; DBK & PIF weren't mad that they had enemies at the dinner table - but because at a glance it looked like Red Son had stolen himself a spouse without warning them! And he brought some of his spouses family members to hammer out the details!

If the gang hadn't immediately brought up the Samadhi Fire; DBK's next sentence would have been asking them; "What are your intentions with my child? Do we need to provide a dowry? Is there plans for grandchildren?"

Red Son might have died on the spot. XD

[sully-s]

Batman Quest To Get A Birkin Bag

Ok so I have a very indulgent, SuperBats head fanfic that keeps me company on days that I forget to charge my earphones while walking my dog and to bore my wonderfully accommodating friends over dinner.

Long story short it’s a character study about Clark after his death. Doomsday kills him becuase we do not subscribe to Synder movies in this household.

Mostly its about Bruce grieving and reflecting on his ten+ year marriage with the man of steel with a large helping of the Justice League members bonding and finally getting to know Bruce and in turn Clark. (Kal never really got to say specifics about his life because Bruce wanted to keep his identity secret therefore a lot of Clark's life was private.)

For most of the fic Clark’s dead. But I'm one for angst with a happy ending so he comes back. How he comes back I have all kinds of versions but I just want to share this really silly one that I’m slightly obsessed with.

It’s about two years after Clark died. Currently, Bruce and Hal are off-world for a two-month mission. Shortly after they leave the League are battling some sorcerer who's in possession of a Jinn. During the battle two of the three wishes are used and at the end it's Flash who gets to use the last one.

He wishes for Clark to be revived back to life.

Jinn says he can't do that

Flash thinks of course just like in Aladdin you can't bring the dead back, make someone fall in love or wish for more wishes.

The Jinn is like how dare you think that's not within my power of course I can bring back the dead, I can't bring back Superman because Clark's not dead. he's just in his grave too weak to break out of his grave due to the lack of sunlight.

Flash hears this and immediately rushes over to dig up Kal.

The next month and a half are all about Clark adjusting to the changes over the last three years (Like having a new kid at the manor: Tim) Meeting new members (Green Arrow, Martian Man Hunter), and really bonding with his teammates ect.

While waiting for Bruce's return Clark asks Barry what he'd like.

Barry is confused

Clark clarifies that Barry was able to bring back one of Bruce's loved ones “to life.“ That’s never happened and for a man like Bruce who loves deeply for his family he going to be very grateful and he will not take “I’m just glad I could help” for an answer. So Barry needs to think of something or Batman will.

Barry doesn't know what to ask for but knows that Bruce is rich. He figures this would be a great time to get that designer bag that Iris always wanted but they could never justify ever buying. (Listen I don’t know if Iris is a designer girly but in this fic she really just likes this one bag.)

So Bruce and Hal get back and after the big celebration party, the JL held for Clark and Bruce's reunion. Bruce approaches Barry thanks him and asks if there’s anything he can do.

Thinking Barry is going to ask for a house, pull some strings with his Brucie persona so he can better his life at his job or status. Maybe ask for Bruce to fund or set up a wellness program for people in Central City.

But Barry is just like: Uh well Iris has always liked this bag.

And Bruce is thinking Really Barry You brought the love of my life back to life I’d move mountains (without Clark’s help) for you and you want some designer bag for your wife?

Bruce: Do you have a picture?

And as soon as Barry shows him the bag Bruce knows moving mountains would be so much easier.

The bag Barry wants to get is a Birkin Bag.

Now if you know anything about Birkin bags 1. they’re stupid expensive. 2. If you can afford one that doesn't mean you get to buy one. Hermes the company that makes them has this irate practice that you have to work up a good relationship with the store and the sales associates in said store to even get the privilege to buy a Birkin (usually by buying a ton of other Hermes products you don’t want.) Sometimes you buy half the store but if you’re not a high-profile client or they don't like your image they just brush you off and postpone your chance to ”buy” a Birkin. And if you do all of the above prerequisites You don't even get to pick the bag they "give" you one. Want a pink colorway? Sorry here's lime green you're welcome.

Now Barry has no knowledge of any of this and just thinks a Birkin is just some overpriced bag. The problem is Iris only likes this one colorway ( Size 35cm, Red Alligator Exterior, Gold hardware, Yellow Slik interior ect.)

This is going to be near impossible.

But In Bruce's mind, Flash did the impossible in bringing back Clark (Bruce thinks Clark was wished back to life because that's the story everyone is sticking to. Because the emotional trauma of letting Bruce know that Clark was alive the whole time rotting away in a grave for 2 years is not on anyone’s todo list.) So he will get this bag Even if it kills him. He's the goddamn Batman.

And all this lead up is to what I'm actually obsessed with

I just love the idea that Bruce is running around Brucie-ing it up to try to get in Hermes' good graces but his image of being a drunk playboy is activity stopping him from buying any bag.

He calls up the Daily Planet and starts setting up all these puff PR-boosting articles to up his image. Which starts rumors becuase Burce Wayne doesn’t do interviews so why now?

Gotham elite catches wind that Burcie Wayne wants a Birkin richest man in America can't get one. So they all start getting Birkins. They ware them to his galas, just to troll Burcie. The elite jump on the waitlist inflating the list to stupid long. Hermes starts to wear the exclusivity of Brucie Wayne as a sign of good taste and prestige. Bruce searches the second-hand market and can't find the colorway Iris's wants.

Bruce goes undercover as a worker for a local Hermes store to become his own sales associate just so he can get around the prejudices of Bruce Wayne image and start racking up a sales history. (He just selling and buying to himself lol.)

So Bruce is playing a luxury salesman using his background of old money and Alfred’s butlering to woo potential buyers. Working his first retail job ever. Having to suck up to management so he can plead his case about Bruce Wayne. Using his access to get informed on what bags are currently available, who’s on the waitlist, where they rank, and criteria on how and what moves you up the list ect.

After months and becoming the number one salesman, he makes his case to allow Brucie Wayne to buy a bag.

It’s declined.

So he switches tactics.

He just makes a new cover as a recently won lottery winner looking to burn cash and wants to burn it with Hermes. And starts a new sale history. Using all of his knowledge and intel about what gets you on the waiting list.

He gets stonewalled a few times by former co-workers that he gets around by blackmailing them with gossip and infractions he witnessed or was told In confidence when he was a fellow sales associate.

Finally, his lottery winner persona is put on a waitlist. The only problem is he’s at the very bottom.

So what does he do?

He suties up As Batman and starts intimidating all those who are higher on the list than his lottery winner cover rocketing him up the list.

He hits a roadblock when he tries to scrace a woman on the list who doesn’t believe he’s actually Batman becuase “Why would Batman even want with a Birkin?”

Which leads to an escalation that gets him an earful from Superman who’s called to the scene by said woman whos terrified after Batman strings her upside down over the edge of her high-rise penthouse.

Clark offers to buy the bag becuase who wouldn’t want that kinda of PR endorsement?

Which Bruce vittamently refuses becuase it would cheapen the gift.

Finally, after a week of terrorizing wait-listers, his lottery winner persona is “given“ the opportunity to buy a bag.

But disaster strikes when that lucky break he thought he got because he was next on the list was actually bad luck becuase the person was bumped off becuase they bought the bag that Bruce had painfully calculated to purchase which was the only bag that would be made in the next 3 years that has the colorway that Iris wanted.

So Bruce tracks down and comforts the buyer in the dead of night as Batman. The buyer freaks out and says they didn't even want this colorway and really wanted a Caranery yellow ostrich skin colorway and if he could get her that one she'd trade for it.

This leads Bruce to play matchmaker for a series of buyers that have Birken Bags they don't love and would trade for their dream bag. And after months of fetch questing and matching sad Birken owners around the world with their dream bags Bruce he pulls it off. He finally gets a Canary, yellow ostrich skin colorway Birkin bag trades it for Iris’s dream bag. Only to find out it was ruined in a car crash that was caused by an alien invasion 2 months before that the JL had a particularly nasty time with and it was Bruce’s Batmobile that was thrown into her parked car.

The bag is a mess the zipper borken, missing hardware, leather scratched. But Bruce so done with everything accepts the trade and takes it back to the cave. Where he proceeds to 3D scan the bag then composite a CAD model and starts to collect all the raw components of the bag himself.

Getting only the best materials (much better than what Hermes was using) Talking to Killer Corc on how to find the best alligator pelts. Flying to India to personally pick out the red dye for the color. Mining the gold for the hardware from an asteroid that was threatening the Watchtower.

After he has everything Bruce proceeds to by hand construct an exact replica of Iris's dream bag. Essentially making the most over-budgeted fake to exist. Where he finally gives it to Barry (who has no inkling of the time and effort Bruce has put into this side project that has taken the better part of a whole year) who jokes in saying “Oh wow takes 12 months to run to the store huh?”

[under-the-stars-au]

interesting you know of the echo flowers, Isabeau, when did you learn about them

They have been in the Underground for a while now, of course they know about echo flowers x)

___________ This answer took a ridiculous amount of time to make ! But finally it's here, the next ones I planned to answer might take less time to make It may not be ideal to make such long answers, but I like taking time to give some lore and make some funny interactions too

___________ THE DIALOGUES IN CASE YOU CAN'T READ MY HANDWRITING 1 :

Isa : Well, it's kinda obvious, right ? A monster told us 'bout it ! Isa : We were just heading to this place after passing through the wacky skeleton 2 :

Isa : We all agreed when we left the ruins to avoid interactions with monsters as much as possible Isa : We need to protect ourselves and the kid by being as discreet as possible 3 :

Isa : But Sif... doesn't care at all. He just approach them and talk to them like they are buddies ! Isa : We tried to stop him at first, but after a while we just let that slide Isa : So, when we arrived at "Waterfall", he approached a monster and asked them about those weird flowers 4 : Isa : And they answered them with a big smile Isa : They said that those things were called "echo flowers", and that they repeat the last thing they heard on loop 5 : Isa : Talking back to each other until it turns into meaningless mumbles 6 : Bonnie : Eeesh, that's creepy Mirabelle : Oh Change, I'm having chills just looking at it, it's, it's... 7 : Mirabelle : The coolest thing I've even seen in my life ! Isa : He, it reminds you of those books you love huh ? 8 : Siffrin : BONNIE HAS A CRAB FACE 9 : *echo flowers repeat that last line* 10 : Bonnie : GAASP YOU ! Isabeau laugh loudly Mirabelle : Siffrin !! That was so mean ! Odile : Okay, okay kids, it was funny and all but we should get going 11 : Bonnie : ZA DON'T KNOW HOW TO USE CHOPSTICKS ! 12 : *echo flowers repeat again* 13 : Isa : W-Wha ? I didn't even said anything... Bonnie : HA ! Now all the monsters know that you're a big baby Za ! Mirabelle : Both of you STOP IT Odile : You kids clearly have no clue what "being quiet" means. Stop this or we'll die Siffrin (inner dialogue) : No matter how many times you bring him into this mess, it's always funny 14 : Isa : Aaaand that's the tell of our "echo flowers adventure" Mirabelle : Even though talking to monsters can be dangerous since they can take our souls, I really like learning more about them 15 : Odile: Could you tell me why you are answering those questions ? It's not like those flowers can hear you, or even answer back Isa : He, who knows ? Maybe that tiny skeleton guy can actually hear us through those. And I dare you to tell me that it isn't funny to answer to weirdly specific questions coming from a flower Mirabelle : It is really funny. You should try answering too Madame 16 : Siffrin (inner dialogue) : But it does seem like they can hear and answer back. They wouldn't have ask about the flowers if they didn't. Strange... Odile : I WON'T participate in the pranks and games of that "tiny skeleton guy". I am still incredibly annoyed by this monster

Thank you for your patience <3