#cause this is my second pub and first in a while where it's the single featured story
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foxmulderautism · 11 months ago
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good lord i have to read the flash fiction i've decided i don't like reading anymore in order to answer these questions about it. my life is so difficult
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onetimetwotimesthreetimess · 1 year ago
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If you still want prompts, I need more drunk Alec in my life
I’m always up for malec prompts babygirl. Especially drunk Alec is a babe. I haven’t written canon malec in a while so here’s them being dorks as always.
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“No matter how far, don't worry, baby.
“Just call my name, I'll be there in a hurry
“You don't have to worry,” The voice yells through the loud pub as Magnus steps through the portal.
His eyes glances through the crowd to find his idiots but it doesn’t take him long, takes him barely a single second because said idiots are on the stage, yelling on the karaoke.
Magnus cuts through the crowd to reach at the centre when he hears his name called.
“Magnus!!” He turns to see Jace waving towards him excitedly, Isabelle standing next to him, jumping and shouting at the stage.
He reaches the two of them and asks, “On a scale of 0 to what happened on 15th May; how drunk are these three?”
Jace chortles, smacking at his shoulder and Magnus punches him back.
He’s not drunk enough to take up with Jace’s incessant habit of treating him like a ‘bro’ when he’s drunk.
“Clary is a solid 15. Simon already puked seven times. And Alec, Raziel, Alec is worse than Izzy on 15th May.”
Magnus turns towards the stage, where the three idiots, with his main idiot in between stand, yelling and singing loudly.
Alec‘s unbuttoned his top two buttons, his hair is a mess—the sexy, hot kind, and he has an arm loosely around Clary, who looks as drunk as him. Simon is also there, with his hot nerd face that’s getting hotter ever since he got engaged with Izzy but Magnus for the life of him cannot care—even if he tries to look at anything but his Alec.
There’s just something about him right now, the carelessness that he’s been missing for a while, since he’s become to Consul and their world has gone to shit.
Right now, the man looks like he doesn’t have a care in this world and while Magnus loves Alec in his serious consul mode, this, this is how he wants his Alec to always look like.
With his cheeks flushed and a million dollar smile on his face.
Like always, the same way it’s been happening for a decade now, Alec feels his presence in the room before he even sees him and he tracks how his husband’s eyes wander across the room, searching for him.
And then they land on him and, somehow, Magnus isn’t sure how, doesn’t think it should be legal but the smile and happiness on Alec’s face increase tenfold. It cracks his chest and threatens to burn him.
“Magnus is here!!!” Alec yells, excitedly.
Clary and Simon look in his direction and wave at him too.
Alec pulls away to get to him but Clary stops him, eyes all fiery as she speaks, “Finish the song first.”
Magnus chuckles at the small pout that Alec makes before his husband launches back into the song, only this time, he’s staring directly into his eyes as he sings.
“Cause, baby, there ain't no mountain high enough.
“Ain't no valley low enough
“Ain't no river wide enough
“To keep me from getting to you, babe,” Alec sings with a stupid smile and Magnus’s face softens at him, his cheeks widening.
The shadowhunter finally escapes Clary’s grasp and jumps off the stage; infront of him and Magnus thinks Alec’s going to kiss him now, with the proximity as he comes closer but the man shouts in his ears, “Cause baby, there ain’t no mountain high enough.”
Magnus laughs loudly, before winding his arms around Alec’s waist who in turn places his arms around Magnus’s neck.
“Hi.”
“Hi, my darling.”
Alec’s hair is all wet and Magnus runs a hand through them, pushing them in place but they fall on his face again. The man is skipping on his feet happily.
“Alec, brother. That was fucking amazing,” Jace wipes fake tears, or wait—Jace wipes actual tears off his face as he pulls his parabatai in a hug.
His husband hugs his parabatai back as tightly as he can and the two have a moment in the middle of the pub for no bloody reason.
He shakes his head in affection at the two idiots, but he’s glad Alec has that, he’s always admired the relationship the two shared.
Alec Lightwood will always love Jace Herondale more than his own life.
“Why are you two morons hugging like you were separated in a war,” Magnus comments because he can. Alec turns towards him and jumps in his arms again.
“Hi.”
Magnus chuckles. “Hi again.”
Alec lays his head on Magnus’s shoulder, nuzzling in a way very familiar to Chairman Meow.
“Magnus.”
“Hmmm.”
“I have to tell you
tell you something.”
Magnus runs his fingers through Alec’s hair. “What is it?”
Alec pulls back, and peers at him. “I’m very drunk.”
A breathless peal of laughter leaves his body and he kisses Alec’s forehead. “Oh, honey. I know.”
He grabs Alec’s face in his face, his gorgeous gorgeous face, free of any troubles and caresses his cheeks. “You look very happy, my love.”
Alec beams at the words.
“I am happy.”
“I like you when you’re this happy,” he whispers against his mouth and thumbs over his eyebrows, over the frown lines that are usually there.
“I like you all the time.”
Magnus rolls his eyes.
Asshole.
“Don’t try to one-up me while I’m being sappy, Alexander.”
Alec giggles and Magnus wonders why and how on earth has he not kissed Alec yet. So, he leans in to kiss his husband. He brings their mouths together slowly, exploring like he can’t create an exact replica of Alec’s mouth if he wanted to.
“Oh fuck!” Alec explains suddenly, pulling back.
“What?” He whines.
“We forgot Max and Rafe.”
“We did not forget. More important, you did not forget,” Magnus assures him. “They’re with Cat.”
“Oh,” Alec says, then beams. “Okay.”
“What do you want to do tonight?” He asks.
Magnus wishes he can give Alec more nights like this—more nights when he can just ask Alec what he wants and Alec has the freedom to say yes. When the burden of saving an entire race isn’t on his broad, and sexy shoulders.
“Marry you.”
He snorts.
“What?” Alec pouts. “Will you marry me?”
“No.”
Alec puts a hand on his chest. “Wow.”
“You’re an idiot.”
“Is that why you won’t marry me? Because I’m an idiot.”
“Yes.”
Alec pauses for a second, thoughtfully.
“If I say ‘I’ll try not to be an idiot’ in my vows, will you marry me then?”
“Nope,” he grins.
“Pretty please?” Alec flutters his lashes and Magnus feels his heart in his mouth.
He recalls a time when Alec was shy, when every single smile was rare, when the shadowhunter boy with the sure and steady heart didn’t understand the effect he had on Magnus. When he was careful in every step he took.
When he didn’t know how much Magnus’s ass was obsessed with him.
It’s not the case now.
Now Alec knows.
Alec knows how every breath he takes, every action, every gesture, how it makes Magnus fall in love with him even more. He knows how to capitalise on that now.
“Please, baby.”
“Have you forgotten that we’re already married?”
Alec rolls his eyes, the first of his night surprisingly. “Of course I remember.”
“And?”
“And what?”
“You want to do it again?”
“Yep.”
“You’re a dork.”
“Is that a yes?”
“No.”
“MAGNUS!!!!!!.”
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kimsgoeun · 2 years ago
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plots, muses, and fcs i wanna have/use. i prefer writing on tumblr and will most likely write using my multimuse blog. like or message me if you’re interested. 
plots
give me a “i’ve been in love with my best friend forever but they’ve never noticed, so i decided to start something up with best friend’s enemy/rival in the hopes of making them jealous.” 
muse a is a knight—it’s all they have ever wanted to be. muse b is a prince/princess, and muse a is assigned to personally protect them. this could go one of two ways—they could be fond of each other and eventually fall for one another, even though muse b is meant to marry into a noble family; OR they could both dislike each other but honor dictates that muse a must put up with muse a, and it’s more like an enemies-to-lovers sort of deal.
“A plot where a flower crown, summer dress wearing innocent princess of a girl goes to a festival and by chance meets the lead guitarist of one of the head-lining acts. He’s super punk and is known as the player/heartbreaker of his band and first of all just sees the girl as another groupie to add to his list–there’s lots of sneaking back stage and into tents when its dead late and eye fucking when he’s on stage. Then surprise, surprise, he falls hard for her her only to find out later that she has some sophisticated, rich boyfriend from some ivy league college and she’s not actually so innocent after all.”
give me a plot based off of ‘my love story with yamada-kun at lv999â€Č; after muse a’s bf dumps them for someone they met online in a game, muse a decides to show up to a game event in the hopes of getting their ex to regret their decision. muse b is a well-known gamer online but doesn’t have much interest in the real world. the pair happen to meet in person after realizing they know of each other through one of the games muse b plays. muse a, spotting their ex and their new gf, convinces muse b to pretend to be in a relationship with them just to save face. 
witch hunter and witch having an illicit affair
demon x human gfs
"we met in the woods while riding early in the morning and had an intense fuck session but opps turns out you are actually my brother's betrothed since birth and your marriage will end up a centuries long dispute between our kingdoms"
i just want a i have a famous boyfriend but i cannot tell anyone plot cause cute like going out at night and dressing him up so that people won’t recognize him, secret meetings at the closet and FUCKING inside the bus
*whispers* a f/f thread where they’re two best friends, coworkers, whatever. who are both single and decide to spend valentine’s day together watching movies, eating snacks and drinking wine as gal pals but at some point of the night they’re singing to their favorite song because FUCK YEAH they sooo don’t need a man and slow dancing and there’s too much wine in their system and it’s all too unintentionally romantic that they start kissing and oh
..
ok but someone give me that cute bartender storyline though? like this guy tends bar at a restaurant or a pub or something and always sees this cute girl hanging out there, but she’s always either with friends or with some guy so he never really gets the time to talk to her BUT ONE DAY she walks into the place alone and orders so many drinks until she’s so bloody drunk, screaming about how her boyfriend cheated on her, that the bartender had to bring her home himself. she wakes up with a horrible hangover, stumbles out the room to find the bartender cooking breakfast and rolling his eyes, laughing. “first of all, you’re an idiot. second, we didn’t have sex if that’s what you’re wondering. third, breakfast will be ready soon. sit.” and fluff commences HELP PLZ
but what about “your ex hired me to make you fall in love with me then break your heart but oops i think i fell in love and now i’m conflicted what the fuck is happening i’m supposed to hurt you ow what am i sUPPOSED TO DO” that’d be rad
muses (totally open to other plots for them btw)
jang soo-min 
25 | athletic trainer | park yoo-na fc
very work-oriented; sarcastic; more of a tomboy; reactive; likes to host parties; social
plot ideas: ▶ muse  a  was  invited  to  spend  the  summer  at  their  best  friends  beach  house  with  their  entire  family  ,    including  the  older  brother  /  sister  (  muse  b )  that  they’ve  had  a  small    (  but  hopeless  )    crush  on  since  middle  school  .    despite  all  the  years  they’ve  known  each  other  ,    they’ve  never  spent  this  much  time  around  each  other  and  it’s  hard  to  keep  their  eyes  off  of  one  another  ,    especially  when  the  hot  summer  sun  is  involved  . ▶ i just need a “hey, i know you’re dating my brother but he’s an asshole and just playing with you but me, i’m in love with you since 3rd grade” plot? ▶ Oh your parents planned a surprise visit and now you’re having that awkward ‘Where is your life going? We’re low key disappointed in you.’ conversation in a ridiculously public place? Here let me pretend to be the reason you’ve been staring at your phone this whole time. “Hey baby, sorry I’m late.” ▶ athletic trainer x athlete
jasper o’hara 
26 | financial analyst | alex fitzalan fc
a little impulsive; was a major screw-up growing up (still is a little bit now); tends to avoid relationships; a smart-ass; has a strained relationship with his family; doesn’t really believe he’s capable of much
plot ideas: ▶ “academic rivals to lovers but she’s the only one who hates him and he’s been in love with her since the day they met” ▶ pls gimme a cliche ass plot with two best friends where muse a is an asshole who fucks everything with a pulse & doesn’t care about anyone but gets super protective etc about their best friend muse b at all times!! ▶ “i had to be ur fake boyfriend/girlfriend bc some creep was hitting on you and it was making you uncomfortable and now i have busted knuckles and a cut lip but hey are u okay” au
min moon-ji 
31 | art teacher | shin hye-sun fc
soft spoken; takes her a while to warm up to people; invisible middle child; doesn’t like asking for help
plot ideas: ▶ “Muse A is well-mannered, polite, quiet, and shy, and Muse B didn’t even know they existed until they tap on Muse B’s shoulder and asks them out super awkwardly/nervously. Muse B, feeling bad for them, agrees and ends up having a rather awkward and weird first date with them. Despite this, Muse A asks them out a second time, and while Muse B doesn’t exactly think it’s a good idea, finds themselves agreeing again. Of course the second time around, Muse A goes in for a kiss and it ends up not being chaste, sweet, or awkward like Muse B expects, but instead it’s rough and passionate and oops, now Muse B is a little more interested to see where things lead.” ▶ we’ve been best friends since we were kids, and people always see us as practically siblings, and we do everything together, but one night we had a ~ moment ~ and things have been weird ever since. now you’re making out with someone else right in front of me, and i don’t know why it makes me so upset, you’ve had bfs/gfs before and it wasn’t a problem. ▶ teacher x teacher ships
sebastian pierce-waldorf 
25 | brand marketing assistant | felix mallard fc
arrogant and a little condescending; tries to please his parents even if he hates the life they want for him; kind of a stick in the mud; high-strung; leads a semi-double life tp let off steam; occasionally does underground ring fights; too emotionally unavailable to be in relationships
plot ideas: ▶ enemies to lovers // enemies with benefits ▶ “We’re fake-dating and I’m supposed to publicly break up with you but you’ve been irritating me lately so instead of dumping you I publicly proposed to mess up your plan and now we’re getting married, fuck” au ▶ childhood friends where you’re about the only person i can stand being around and i’m really protective over you
wren gables 
 41 | hitman | ben barnes fc
lots of anger; got into the job to exact revenge; overthinker and a little narrow-minded; perfectionist in their work; loner
plot ideas: ▶ all i want right now is a clichĂ© undercover marriage 1x1 where there’s two spies who hate each other and everyone knows it but now they’re the only two available for this long term undercover mission as a married couple in an apartment/suburb and they have to be believable through dinner parties and etc. just pleASE give this to me ▶ Give me a dark couple. Two ex-killers who have gone domestic and can’t seem to adjust properly, despite it being what they both agreed on. ▶ Give me an assassin and a girl he can’t kill and I’ll ship the hell out of it.
fcs
angelina jolie
anne hathaway
banita sandhu
ben barnes
bona 
brie larson
catherine haena kim
chae jong-hyeop
dichen lachman
henry golding
kang tae-oh
katherine mcnamara
kim taeri
lee joo myung
lee soo hyuk
levy tran
lewis tan
meghann fahy
nathalie emmanuel
penn badgely
rowoon
sam claflin
sandra oh
simone ashley
song jihyo
song kang
tati gabrielle
theo james
woo do hwan
yoo in na
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vendettaparker · 3 years ago
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Reckless [T.H]
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Summary: In a fit of jealousy, Tom embarrasses you in front of your new friend and the entire pub, leaving you heartbroken at his reckless actions.
Word Count: 4.1k
Warnings: Swearing, angst, slut-shaming 
a/n: hi! sorry this took so so so long for me to get out! i got super busy with other works, but i’m super happy with how this turned out :) i hope you enjoy this, and don’t worry, i know how scary those warnings look ^ but this ends happy, i promise! as always, comments and reblogs are appreciated <3
∘₊✧──────✧₊∘
Tom was an idiot. He was an actual fucking idiot. He now realizes that as he watches you run out of the pub with hot tears streaming down your face. He watches as Harry runs after you, your bag in his hand, probably to make sure you make it back home safe since there was no way you’d return to the crowded bar, where Harrison and Sam were giving Tom death glares, the same little pub where Tom had made a complete fool out of you. 
The few months Tom came home to London were always the setting of your most cherished memories. Sometimes it seemed like when he left so did the whole group of friends you surround yourself with.
There was no doubt in your mind that Tom was the life of the party. He had a certain aura about him that caused some of the most fucked up, but amazing situations to occur. That was probably one of the reasons you loved him so much. 
When he was in town, his brothers, Harrison, and Tuwaine all joined together to make the next few months memorable before he had to leave again, and you were always included, but when he was gone, Harry usually went with him, Harrison focused on work for himself, and Sam focused on his restaurant. The world slowed down after Tom left, and so many times, you were left to wait for his return; alone. 
Tom hated leaving you behind every time he went back to the states, but you had such deep roots in London, he didn’t want to pry you from your family for months on end. He loved you too much to constantly subject you to his hectic lifestyle. He spent as much time with you as he could when he saw you, but the second he had to go, it was all tearful goodbyes in a crowded airport. 
You and Tom had been best friends for decades at this point. You supported him no matter what it was that he wanted to accomplish. He’s even said in interviews that he credits a huge bulk of his success to his friend back home, then he’d give a wink to the camera, and you always knew it was for you. 
∘₊✧──────✧₊∘
When Tom came home after filming Spider-Man: No Way Home, you practically tackled him to the ground in a hug. 
“You div,” You mumbled into his neck, “you forgot to let me FaceTime with Zendaya.” 
“Oh, shit!” Tom gasped, finally remembering your request to talk to your favorite actress, “my bad.”
You looked at Tom incredulously, “I don’t think I can be friends with you anymore.” You feigned hurt, clutching your hand to your chest, “it just hurts too much.” 
“That’s a damn shame,” Tom frowned, “I mean, I could just FaceTime Zendaya now, but if that’s how you—”
“I changed my mind,” You smiled sweetly, cutting him off, “love you, bestie.” 
Tom rolled his eyes and pulled you into another hug, “Missed you, bestie.” 
“Um,” Sam, Paddy, and Harrison stood behind you, clearing their throats. 
“Missed you guys too,” Tom sighed, and he rushed over and gave his brothers and friend a hug.
You gave Harry a hug while Tom chatted with his brothers, quickly catching up with him. 
“What’s the plan for tonight, guys?” You spoke up. 
Every night after Tom got back, he’d go back to his flat and take a nap before a night out on the town. Usually, you’d bar hop a bit before going to a club, so tonight wasn’t likely to be any different. 
“I was thinking we could get dinner at Lorenzo’s,” Harry said, “then maybe hit the pub on Ashford?”
You and the others nodded in agreement as you made your way out of the airport.
“Can I invite my friend Avery?” You asked. 
Tom nodded, “Sure, I didn’t even know you had any other friends, (Y/N),” he joked.
“Haha,” You laughed sarcastically, “gee that was a good one, Tom. You really got me.” 
“What can I say?” He smirked, “I’m a comedian.” 
“Is that the guy you met in your philosophy lecture?” Harrison butt in.
“Yeah,” You nodded, “he’s really sweet, so be on your best behavior guys, and maybe don’t be yourselves, just this once?” you suggested with a slightly teasing tone. 
“Are you trying to impress him or something?” Tom inquired.
“No,” You scoffed, “I’m just trying to not throw him to the wolves.” 
Tom laughed along, but it was strained. He wasn’t too keen on the idea of adding a new member to your friend group, and the little glint in your eye when you talked about Avery made his heart tighten. 
∘₊✧──────✧₊∘
“Okay,” You smiled as you set the last of Tom’s luggage in his living room, “I’ll let you get some sleep then.”
You gave him one last hug and a kiss on the cheek, “see you later.” 
Tom reciprocated and inhaled the sweet smell of lavender in your locks of hair, “mhm,” he sighed, “see ya.” 
Harrison was about to walk out after you when Tom grabbed the collar of his shirt and pulled him back, “Mate, what the fuck.” he grumbled as he stumbled over his feet, “I thought you wanted to take a nap?”
“I slept on the plane,” Tom explained quickly, “you’ve been here the whole time, right?” Harrison nodded, “so you know this Avery guy, yeah?”
Harrison shook his head, “I haven’t talked to (Y/N) much this past month, but he’s probably on her Instagram.” 
Harrison pulled out his phone and looked at posts you’d been tagged in, “Ah, here.” He handed the phone to Tom and pointed to the tall blonde guy in a group photo with you and some other friends, “He’s the tall blonde.” 
Tom studied the picture with a small frown, “They’re not dating though, right?”
“She said he was her friend,” Harrison shrugged.
“You know what I mean,” Tom rolled his eyes, “do they look really chummy to you?”
“His hand’s kind of close to her butt, but other than that I don’t know.” Harrison pointed it out, causing Tom’s heart to momentarily stop. 
“Ok, new plan,” Tom announced, “I’m going to ask (Y/N) out tonight.” 
Harrison scoffed and rolled his eyes. “What?” Tom wondered.
“You’ve said that almost every single time you’ve been home and you always chicken out.”
“No, I don’t!” Tom gasped in offense, “It’s just hard to find the right time.”
“You’ve literally had hundreds of opportunities to tell her how you feel, Mate.”
“It has to be perfect.” Tom insisted, “I can’t just ask her out of the blue, I have to butter her up first.”
“That’s dumb.” 
“Oh, fuck off,” Tom groaned, “get out, I changed my mind, I’m going to sleep.” 
Harrison rolled his eyes and chuckled before giving Tom a pat on the back and leaving. Tom waved goodbye as Harrison drove away, and then rushed to his phone. 
“FaceTime Zendaya,” he instructed Siri. The call went through and soon Tom was met with Zendaya's tired eyes in a dark room. 
“Hey, Z!” Tom said cheerfully, “best friend, bestest pal in the world. The person that never wants to see me fail ever, my greatest companion—“
“Tom,” Zendaya groggily cut him off, “what the fuck do you want, I’m sleeping.” 
“How do you ask a girl out?”
Zendaya sat up a little more and turned on her bedside lamp, “What? You don’t know how to ask a girl out?”
“Well I do,” Tom backtracked, “but I want it to be special. I’ve been in love with this girl for nearly two years now and every time I go to ask her out, I chicken out.”
“I don’t know, what does she like?”
“Well one time she told me her favorite animal was a sea otter, should I get her one?” Tom pondered, hand resting in his chin in thought. 
“Um, no, what the fuck?” Zendaya squinted her eyes at Tom, “have you gotten any sleep yet?” 
Tom shook his head, “This is important, Z, now help me!” 
Zendaya rolled her eyes, “I’ll text you some ideas, but for now just go get some sleep. With how tired you are now you’d probably call her the wrong name or something.” 
Tom rolled his eyes, but the action caused his eyelids to droop even more, “Fine, fine,” he conceded, “I’ll let you know how it goes.” 
∘₊✧──────✧₊∘
“Okay,” Tom announced at the restaurant before you arrived, “I’m going to ask (Y/N) out tonight so I need you all to shut up and not distract me or make me nervous.”
Harrison, Harry, and Sam just stared at Tom. Tuwaine, for some unknown reason, started clapping. 
“Tom,” Harrison began, “no offense, but—“
“Ah ah ah,” Tom stopped him, “is what you’re about to say going to bruise my ego?” Harrison thought about it for a moment before slowly nodding, “okay, then shut the fuck up, respectfully. I don’t need any bad juju tonight.” 
“Well, I’m happy for you, Mate,” Tuwaine nodded. He was the closest to you after Tom and he knew all about your crush on the brown-haired Brit. You might’ve let it slip once when you were drunk, and since you didn’t willingly tell Tuwaine, he was sworn to secrecy. “I’m positive she’ll say yes.” 
“Thank you,” Tom smiled at him, sending a slight glare to the others for their lack of faith in him. “As for the rest of you, I can’t wait to prove you wrong.” 
You walked into the restaurant with Avery hunched over from laughing so hard. Tom smiled in your direction and waved you over, “Hey, (Y/N/N)! Over here!”
“Wow,” You chuckled, “must’ve been a good nap. Little energetic there, huh?” 
Tom went in to give you a tight hug, holding you close, “Just missed you,” he mumbled into your hair. 
“I just saw you a few hours ago?”
Avery stood by you awkwardly, waiting for Tom to release you. Tom reluctantly let you go and pulled a chair out for you, next to him. 
“Thanks,” you smiled at him, motioning for Avery to sit next to you, “hey, everyone,” you smiled at the group of boys that were properly about to piss themselves at Tom’s over-the-top behavior, “this is Avery.” 
“Hi,” He waved at the group as a small chorus of ‘hellos’ rang across the table. He turned to Tom to shake his hand, “I’m a big fan, Mate. Love your work.” 
Tom smiled and patted him on the shoulder, “Thanks, it means a lot.” smiled politely, shaking Avery's hand. 
∘₊✧──────✧₊∘
Dinner went off without a hitch, at least in your opinion. Avery was melding well with your friends and he was cracking jokes like he’d know the group for years. 
The boys seemed to enjoy his sense of humor and what he added to the conversation. Sam and him even found that they shared an interest in cooking, which led to them having a slightly heated discussion about how real Gordon Ramsey’s cooking skills are; which ended in laughs. 
However, Tom was probably having one of the worst nights of his life. Every time Avery playfully shoved you while you two laughed he wanted to wring his neck. It also didn’t help that he couldn’t find the perfect time to ask you out. Maybe it wasn’t the best idea to ask you out with all of his mates around. 
Tom smiled and laughed along with the jokes, but once you looked away he was back to frowning. 
“Tom,” Harry nudged his brother, “wipe that scowl off your face.” 
“I’m not scowling,” Tom grumbled, “this is my normal face.” 
Harry rolled his eyes and kicked his older brother under the table, “You need to ask her soon. I think Avery is trying to make some moves on her.” Harry noticed, seeing how Avery casually had his arm around your chair. 
Tom rolled his eyes, “As if I can't see that for myself,” he scoffed. “I don’t want to ask her with all of you watching. What if she says no?” 
“We can leave you alone for a bit when we go to the pub, but I’m not sure if Avery will go with us.” Harry shrugged, “you could always ask her out tomorrow.” Harry suggested. 
“No!” Tom exclaimed, causing everyone to look at him and Harry, “Sorry, I—um, I just don’t really like that shirt on you Harry; it makes my eyes hurt.” 
Harry looked down at his shirt for a moment and then frowned, sending a light smack to Tom, “You bought me this shirt you div.”
Everyone went back to their own conversations so Tom leaned in to talk to Harry some more, “I can’t wait for tomorrow. What if I chicken out again?”
“Then you’re an idiot.” Harry deadpanned with a shrug. 
∘₊✧──────✧₊∘
The pub was way more packed than anyone expected. The new addition of live music to the outside patio definitely livened up the place and more customers went to see what local band would be playing next. 
The pub had a classic English pub feel, with the wood flooring and the yellow-tinted walls, but it also had a modern twist with a back patio and outdoor seating with fairy lights, and the lights that illuminate under the bar itself. 
“I’m gonna go check out the band,” Harry announced after he came back with your drinks, “you guys should all come with me.” He said with a slight side-eye to Sam, Tuwaine, and Harrison. 
“Eh, I’m not really into—” Sam began, but Harry sent him a quick kick under the table. “Ow! I mean, I love music.” Sam smiled enthusiastically. 
“I’m gonna stay back and finish this beer,” Tom said, holding up the large pint of beer he was already a quarter of the way through, “(Y/N), wanna race to see who can finish first?” He suggested trying to get you to stay behind.
“Oh you’re totally on,” You smirked, “but I am going to take a quick peek at the band. We can race after I get back.” You got up from your seat and began walking away with Harry and the boys. Tom pouted at how horribly that plan worked. Harry looked back at Tom apologetically as he held the door open for you.
“Wow,” Avery smiled beside Tom, scaring him, “she really is something.” 
“Holy shit, Mate,” Tom held a hand to his heart, “you almost gave me a heart attack. I thought you went with them?” 
“Nah,” Avery shook his head, “I’m not really into music,” he shrugged. 
“Oh, okay,” Tom nodded. “What were you just saying?”
“(Y/N),” Avery looked towards the back patio exit dreamily, “she’s amazing. I mean I would definitely ask her out, but probably not at a pub surrounded by her mates, y’know?” 
“Mhm, yeah,” Tom said quietly, his heart already beginning to shatter into millions of inconsolable pieces. “I mean, she’s alright.” He said with a forced laugh, trying to fend Avery away from you, “she definitely isn’t really your type, though.” 
“What do you mean?” Avery asked, taking a sip from his beer, “she’s perfect, mate.”
“I mean,” Tom racked his brain for an excuse big enough to make Avery not want you, “you don’t think it’s a little weird she’s in a friend group with all boys?” 
“No,” Avery said slowly, skeptically looking back at the exit, “she just clicks with boys, I guess. Girls and guys can just be friends.”
“Not her,” Tom scoffed, “I mean, it’s just a little obvious, y’know?”
You and the rest of the boys were heading back in, seeing as the back patio was completely overcrowded with patrons. 
“What’s obvious?” Avery asked, raising his voice slightly due to the volume in the bar. 
“(Y/N)’s only friends are guys!” Tom nearly yelled over the volume of chatter, not realizing that the surrounding customers could hear him, “makes me wonder how many she’s slept with! I mean, that’s not a coincidence to me!” 
The surrounding customers halted their conversations, leaving only Tom’s voice filtering through the air and into your ears. 
“That’s crazy,” Avery chuckled awkwardly, “I don’t think she’s like that.” He shook his head, annoying Tom. In a final last-ditch effort to get Avery off your back, he said the worst thing he could, loudly, into a quieting pub. 
“Well, she hits on me all the time,” Tom shrugged, “she’s just a bit whorish, I guess.” 
“Tom,” Tuwaine cleared his throat, interrupting their conversation, “what the fuck, mate?” 
Tom looked at all the boys next to Tuwaine, and behind them was you, teary-eyed with harsh sobs racking through your body. 
You whispered something to Harry, and then all but ran out the front door. Harry walked over to where Tom was sitting and picked up your purse.
“Harry I—” Tom tried.
“Shut the fuck up, Tom.” Harry snapped, “You're an idiot and an asshole, just leave things be.” 
Harry ran out the pub entrance, following you to give you a ride home. 
Tuwaine, Sam, and Harrison shook their heads once the shock ebbed away. One by one they all left Tom sitting in shock and agony at the bar. Avery, not knowing any of the group, barely knew what was going on or if Tom’s accusations were correct, left the pub and went home without another word. 
∘₊✧──────✧₊∘
“Harry,” Tom whined into the phone, “please tell me how to fix this, please I’m begging you.” 
Harry sighed, now properly regretting lifting his silent treatment from Tom, “Tom, there is absolutely nothing I can do to help you, and even if there was, I wouldn’t. You called her a whore in front of a crowded pub—”
“I know!” Tom yelled, “And I’ve been living with that guilt for three weeks now! Please, Harry. I-I messed up so bad.” Tom’s voice cracked, “I tried calling and texting, a-and my texts started turning green. She blocked me,” Tom sobbed, “I’m in love with her, and I never got to tell her. I ruined our relationship before it even began.” 
“Yeah,” Harry agreed, “you did.” 
“Harry, I just want to apologize properly, please.” Tom begged, “I tried going to her house, but her roommate threw a drink at me and told me she went out of town. Where is she?”
“I can’t tell you.” 
“Harry,” Tom sighed, “I’m trying so hard here, I don’t care where she is, I’ll go anywhere for her. Please, I just can’t keep waiting in the dark for her to talk to me.”
Harry sighed, rubbing his forehead, “Okay, fine, but don’t tell her I told you where she was. And if you get your face clawed off, just know that you deserve it.” 
“Okay, okay, now tell me.”
“She’s been staying with Tuwaine and his girlfriend.” 
“Okay, thanks, love you, bye!” Tom said through the phone, already grabbing his keys. 
Harry sighed and began texting Tuwaine, 
Harry: Tom’s coming over, don’t snap him in half, he just wants to talk to her. 
Tuwaine: I’m not home right now, but I'd be more worried about her snapping him in half
 
∘₊✧──────✧₊∘
Tom pulled up the Tuwaine’s flat and pounded at the door. He didn’t see Tuwaine’s car in the driveway but he saw yours parked on the street so he knew you were in there. 
“(Y/N)!” He desperately called, “Come on, I know you’re in there!”, his pleas were met with silence and he rang the doorbell on repeat, “(Y/N), please! I just want to talk!”
The door opened to show you standing there with your messy hair and stained sweats, still looking overwhelmingly perfect in Tom’s eyes. He noticed the dark circles and the dried tears and his heart broke, even more, knowing he caused this. He loved you so much and he caused you some of the worst pain imaginable. All he wanted to do was hold you and kiss your puffy cheeks, desperately whispering praises into your ear. You were perfect in every sense of the word, and he let you believe you were anything less. He was an idiot—the biggest idiot in the world—for making you cry. 
“What do you want?” You snapped with a sniffle, pulling him back to reality as you rubbed your red eyes. 
“I just want to talk,” Tom gave you a small smile, “please.” 
“I don’t have anything to say to you.” You scowled, “You need to leave.” 
“No, (Y/N), please.” Tom begged, “I’m sorry. I’m so so so fucking sorry. I was being an idiot and—please, (Y/N), you’re my best friend. I don’t wanna lose you.” Tom’s voice cracked, but you remained stoic in the doorway. 
“I’m your best friend? Really?” You scoffed, “I thought I was just some whore you let hang around you?” 
Tom winced at his words being thrown back into his face, “I didn’t mean it, I swear,” he promised, tears glistening in his eyes, “I don’t even know why I said that. I was being so fucking stupid—” 
“No,” You interrupted his rambling, “you don’t get to say that. You don’t get to say that it was just you “being stupid”. Who the hell says that about their supposed best friend? Why would you even think that? You don’t just get to call me those things in public, and then say that you don’t know why you did it. You can’t even give me a reason—”
“I’m in love with you,” Tom blurted out, blowing out a puff of air in stress, “I’ve been in love with you for the longest time, (Y/N). And Avery was saying how he wanted to ask you out, and I couldn’t lose you. I didn’t want to lose you. I had so many plans for us, and I wanted to be with you—to be yours—more than anything, and I let my jealousy get in the way. I’m sorry because if I deserved you I wouldn’t have done that.”
You stood in the doorway of the flat, arms crossed over your chest. “I can’t believe you’d be so reckless.” You said after a moment of silence, “I would’ve been yours if you had just asked me.” 
“I’m sorry,” Tom cried, reaching out to hold your hand, but you backed away ever so slightly, “please, I would do anything to fix it if I could.” 
“You don’t understand anything, Tom.” You frowned.
“Help me understand.” He begged.
You pondered it for a moment and then released a sigh, coupled with a few tears, “I loved you,” you admitted. Tom’s heart did a leap, but then he realized that you were talking past tense as if his chance with you was gone.
“And I would spend months and months just waiting for you to come home so I could spend time with you. I was so lonely when you and Harry left; I always am. Avery offered to spend some time with me after class one day and I agreed because I don’t have anybody else when you leave. And it was fun, but he wasn’t you. He’ll never compare to the place you had in my heart, but at least I wasn’t alone anymore.” You sighed and began closing the door again, “Now, because of you, I have no one again.” 
The door was about to slam back in Tom’s face, but he shoved his foot in the threshold, “(Y/N), wait,” he pleaded, “I’m sorry, I didn’t realize how important Avery was to you. I can never undo what I did, but please let me make it up to you. I just need you to understand how sorry I am.” 
You opened the door again and looked at Tom’s sad eyes, boring into you, “I do understand how sorry you are, but I don’t know how I can trust you again. You said awful things about me without even batting an eye or taking a breath—”
“I know,” Tom sighed, “I know and I’d give anything to take it back. I just want you back (Y/N). Even if you don’t want to be my girlfriend, I can’t leave knowing I’ve lost my best friend.” 
“As much as it hurts,” You caved, moving from the doorway to let Tom in, “I still love you, and I don’t want to lose you either.” 
Tom smiled and walked into the flat, immediately pulling you into a hug, “I’m so sorry, (Y/N),” You hugged back and sniffled into his hoodie, before pulling away with a sigh.
“I know,” You nodded, “I forgive you. But next time, just be honest with me and tell me how you’re feeling. I’d give you the world if you asked for it.”
Tom smiled and stroked your tear-stained cheek, “I’ll just settle on your heart for now, if that’s okay?”
“That’s so fucking cheesy.” You giggled, wiping the tears from your eyes, “I love it.”
∘₊✧──────✧₊∘
✧tags & moots✧ @ptersmj @princessofguineapigs @peterbenjiparker @cherrytholland @itsapeterthing @justapurrcat @thirstiestpotato @kelieah @iovebug  @waitimcomingtoo  @rosyparkers  @parkers-gal @allegra-writes @starktonyx  @celestialholland  @hollandcrush  @londonspidey @blissfulparker @spidernerdsblog @spidey-sophie @spideyspeaches @peterparkers-bad-youtube-apology @andilovetowrite @sinisterspidey @asonofpeter @westcoastcigar @arlo-sanders @love-peterparker @boiolay @letssee2468  @white-wolf1940 @fandom-life-12 @hollandsdream @annathesillyfriend @lovelybarnes @miseryholland @wierdteenagenerd @duskholland @hollandprkr @lauras-collection @arvinsescape @hollandsrecs
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novamirmirsblog · 3 years ago
Text
Favourite crime pt 2
Natasha Romanoff x reader
Word Count: 2936
Genre: angsty fluff? or fluffy angst 👀
Request: yes
Warnings: swearing, mentions of cheating, slight coercion into sex (it doesn't happen tho)
Part 1 is here
A/n: The long awaited part two is officially here. I had lots of people who wanted the reader to move on, people who wanted them to get back together and people who wanted both. Thank you everyone for your INDECISIVENESS (kidding. ily). Also Emma was a randomly generated name - I'm sorry :3
Did I write this fic instead of sleeping? Yes. I have no regrets.
It had been a year since you moved back home. The seasons had come and gone and with that, so had your thoughts of Natasha. The same could not be said for the assassin. She had spent a blissful 3 months with Bruce before he had dropped off the face of the Earth and she was missing you. By the 5th month, she had stopped moping about and tried to find you. She searched everywhere but your town was large and unfamiliar and you didn’t want to be found.
Natasha both regretted what she had said and didn't. She regretted it because she realised just how much she adored you once she saw all the areas Bruce fell short in. You knew her better than she sometimes knew herself. You knew when to back off and when to put pressure on. You knew when she needed control and when you needed to take control. You knew when she wanted ice cream or when she wanted brownies. Bruce didn't. However, a part of her didn't regret those nasty things she said because she really didn't deserve you. You were everything she wasn’t, and she didn't know how to measure up to you.
She never voiced these concerns and so they festered and grew until she believed the only way out was to cheat. She knew that was the only thing that could drive you away. Natasha had told you all about her past, how she believed the Red Room had stripped her of her humanity – of her choice whether to become a mother. She knew there were other ways to have children - of course there were, but she hated the fact they had taken that option from her.
You were not like Natasha. You voiced your concerns which is why she knew exactly what to say and do to get you to hate her. Your previous boyfriend had cheated on you with your once best friend. You had watched as your father cheated on your mother and how that made her a hollow shell for a while, her never understanding why the man she loved could hurt her in that way. Supposedly, everyone models their future relationships on what their parents’ relationship looked like. Perhaps that’s why you kept choosing the cheaters. You were content with where you were. You had a forest, a busy town, and a beach all within a 15-mile radius of your house. You were far enough from civilisation that you could forget about reality for a while but close enough to occasionally dip back in whenever you wanted to.
You had kept in contact with Tony and Pepper, congratulating them on the arrival of Morgan and insisting that they should visit. You also continued to occasionally talk to Wanda when Carol was off world. Carol was overjoyed when she found out you had started dating someone new.
You had met Emma when you were taking a dip back into reality at the local supermarket. Her blonde hair vaguely reminded you of a woman you used to know, and you guessed that’s why you felt drawn to her. It wasn’t the electrical crackle that stole your breath away like your first meeting with Natasha, but it was something. Emma could occasionally be a little controlling, but you guessed that’s what normal relationships were like. She didn’t like you going to bars or pubs anymore and you certainly weren’t allowed in any clubs. You didn’t mind it too much as you hardly minded giving up a few nights out if it meant you could have something that resembled normalcy.
“Who’s that?” Emma asked, your face illuminated from your phone as the ding rang out.
“A friend. He’s bringing his wife and new baby over tomorrow and was reminding me to baby-proof the house.” You smiled lightly as you texted Tony back. You hadn’t mentioned to Emma that you were an ex-avenger, but it just kept slipping your mind.
“Why didn’t you tell me? Who is he? Where will he be staying?”
“I just forgot. Sorry. He’ll be staying here.”
“But you only have a single bed.”
“Yeah. I was planning to sleep on that and Tony, Pepper and the baby can stay in my room.”
“You mean our room.”
You said nothing, too engrossed in arguing with Tony about how under no circumstances will there be any celery in your house. Apparently, that was the wrong thing to do.
“Our room, right Y/n?”
“Um yeah.” You wave her off was apparently your second mistake, but you didn’t multi-task too well and so half answers were all you were good for while texting.
“I have been your girlfriend for 3 months Y/n. The least you could do is answer me properly and tell me what’s going on in your life.” She huffed, pushing your feet from her lap, and turning to face away from you, all of which you missed. You really weren’t having that evil green vegetable in your house.
“Seriously, what is even so important that you’re ignoring me right now!” Emma’s voice cut through the fog, and you looked at her with a blank expression. It was times like these that you really missed Na- No. You refused to go there. You didn’t miss her. You were over her.
“No celery.”
Emma threw her hands up in the air. “You seriously don’t see what’s wrong, do you?”
“No.” You tilted your head, confused at what your girlfriend was talking about.
“Well, I’m not just going to tell you! Jesus. You should know. I’ll see you tomorrow.” Emma stood up in a huff, making a lot of noise while getting ready to leave.
“Okay – bye” Your attention was bought back to the phone when Tony sent you a cute video of Morgan crawling about, probably as a bribe to get you to buy celery. You stood, watching the video a few times before you shut off your phone, finally getting around to babyproofing your house.
~~~~~
Babyproofing a house was a lot more work than you originally thought. You had spent most the night picking sharp objects up from baby-height areas and making sure you hadn’t left any weapons about. All the guns taped under tables had to be relocated and you found enough change to set you up for retirement. You just hoped and prayed there were no small beads for Morgan to choke on. You didn’t even get around to putting soft corners on the edges of tables and counter tops, but you told yourself that it was survival of the fittest at that point. The whole endeavour had taken most the night which is how you found yourself with only an hour till Tony, Pepper and Morgan arrived.
There was a knock on the door, and you saw that you were 15 minutes late. Luckily your girlfriend had arrived half an hour before so you figured she could let them in. You shouted down, telling her to get the door as you finished putting on your socks.
“Hiya baby!” You cooed at Morgan babbling in Pepper’s arms, watching as her chubby hands reached for your hair, grabbing on with a crazy amount of strength. “Oh my god you’re strong. Pep, are you sure she’s Tony’s? I’m pretty sure she’s as strong as Thor.” You laughed, looking over at Tony. Your face dropped into careful neutrality as you saw the redhead standing behind him.
“Of course she’s mine doofus. We had multiple paternity tests.” Tony winked.
You didn’t know what to do. You weren’t ready. Your throat went dry as you asked if anyone wanted any drinks, your girlfriend waving them into the living room. You prepared the drinks, and you felt a presence behind you, wrapping their arms around your waist, their head resting on your back. You hated it. You felt suffocated. You took a breath and handed half the drinks to Emma, opting to grab a wine glass and fill it with the wine you had been saving for a special occasion. It might not have been a special occasion, but you needed something strong to get though the next few hours and you knew this would do the job.
You made your way back into the living room and Tony gestured to Emma “I don’t think we’ve met yet.”
“I’m Emma.”
“Tony. This is Pepper, Morgan and Natasha.” Your heart dropped at the mention of her name, realising that she wasn’t some cruel hallucination but was in fact standing in your living room.
“Sorry. I forgot to introduce you all.” You smiled and took another large swig from your glass.
“Hey how come you’re the only one with alcohol?”
“Because youïżœïżœïżœre a parent now.” You rolled your eyes at Tony, feeling Natasha stare holes into your face.
“So I need it even more!” Pepper hit Tony as he said that, causing Morgan to laugh.
“Don’t worry about Y/n getting drunk, she can handle her alcohol pretty well.”
“We know.” Natasha finally spoke. Her voice bought back floods of memories and you realised you missed her voice – just the tiniest amount. “Who exactly are you to Y/n?” To anyone else, the question was flippant, like asking about the weather but you, Tony and Pepper could all hear the carefully laced venom within her words and while the question sounded like it was aimed at your girlfriend, you could tell she was speaking to you.
“Where’s Bruce this fine day?” You shot back, not letting Emma speak.
“My question first.” Natasha finally turned her gaze to focus on you.
“Why are you here?” You felt Emma’s arm slither possessively around your waist. Perhaps if it had been another day, you would have appreciated it but right now, you felt like you were drowning. She held you too tight, you couldn’t move.
“Ah.” Natasha wore a smug look on her face and yet her eyes flashed with hurt. You hated that she had found out information you weren’t willing to give.
“Why are you here Agent Romanoff.” You wanted- no needed her to answer you. You needed to know why she came to you. Then you looked at Tony. “Why would you bring her here?” Your voice was level, Morgan was pulling at your leg to get you to pick her up. You used that as an excuse to escape your girlfriend’s grip.
“We need you back.”
“So you bring your baby to try and bribe me back?” You ran a hand through your hair, lightly bouncing Morgan. “That I can understand but why bring her?” You waved at Natasha, feeling both her and Emma’s eyes bore into you.
“She’s part of the team too and you both need to get on.” Pepper said.
“You were in on this too?” Your throat felt tight. You couldn’t breathe properly.
“I’m sorry but who exactly are you?” Emma asked. Natasha scoffed at her, folding her arms, and rolling her eyes.
Everything was a little too loud and muffled. It felt as if you were underwater. The sun was too bright, and it made everything a little too hard to look at. You could see your furniture, but it wouldn’t stay in your brain long enough for you to fully register it. You placed Morgan on the sofa and took a deep breath, closing your eyes to focus. When you opened them again you looked straight at Natasha.
“I am not going to play nice with you. You broke me and now that I’m moving on you suddenly decide to show up? No. I don’t believe it. Why can’t you just let me be happy? Leave me alone. Besides, I thought I was a ‘fun little distraction’.” You spat at Natasha. You were tired of being the bigger person. She had hurt you and you wanted to watch her bleed. It’s why you leant over and kissed Emma harshly, why you let out a slight moan so Natasha could hear. It didn’t matter that it was completely fake because even though you knew you should feel satisfaction at Natasha’s hurt face, the twinge of sadness upset you more than you would have liked.
Natasha knew the kiss was forced. She knew it was, but it didn’t stop the knife digging deeper into her heart. You had moved on and she had to respect that. She had said some awful things to you, and you really did deserve someone much better than her. You stormed out of the house, saying that you were going for a walk, leaving your girlfriend to entertain your guests.
~~~~~
It was dark by the time you got back. You saw Natasha on the sofa and ignored her as you walked straight to the guest bedroom. All you wanted to do was curl up and sleep this horrible day into the past but unfortunately for you, you had a girlfriend sitting on the bed.
“This bed isn’t big enough for-” Emma cut you off with a rough kiss. “Emma not now-”
“Yes now. I want to remind your ex what she’s missing.” Emma went back to kissing you and you wanted to cry. You didn’t like her possessiveness, didn’t like her jealousy. With Natasha that had been fun but with Emma, it made you feel afraid.
“Emma seriously.” You grabbed her wrist, not letting her reach into your underwear.
Emma huffed and stepped back. “What’s your problem?”
“I’m really tired. Can’t we just sleep?”
“It’s your ex, isn’t it? Why is she even here? I can’t believe you were going to just let her stay here and not tell me!”
“I didn’t know she was coming!” You were both stage whispering, conscious of the fact there was a baby that most likely didn’t sleep all that often.
“Then kick her out!”
You said nothing. You couldn’t just kick her out. That wouldn’t be fair.
“Oh my god you still love her. You still love her and she’s in love with someone else. Or she was. Ha.” Emma let out a bark of laughter. “That’s so fucking rich. You know what, crawl back to her but don’t come crying to me when she fucks you over again do you hear me?”
“Emma that’s not- I don’t love her anymore. I hate her. She ruined my life.”
“You truly hate her?” You nodded at her. “Supposedly, you can only truly hate someone if you loved them first. We’re done Y/n”
“Seriously?! What? Because I used to love Natasha? Because I don’t want to have sex with you? Grow up Emma. I’ve loved people before you and at this rate, I’ll love people after you too. I’m tired. I don’t have to have sex with you. You can’t make me.”
“I’m your girlfriend! You’re supposed to want to have sex with me!”
“Well not when I’ve had a long ass day!”
“Guys, I think you might wake Morgan.” You winced a little at the addition of Natasha. You knew this was going to end badly.
“This is my fucking house!” Emma said, not lowering her tone.
“Actually, it’s Y/n’s.” Natasha calmly stated. She really wasn’t going to rise to the bait.
Your girl- sorry- ex-girlfriend, fumed next to you. “You know what? Have her. She’s so screwed over from whatever you pulled that I don’t think she can love anyone ever again anyway.” Emma seethed, grabbing her shoes, and slamming the door on the way out. The sound of baby Morgan crying echoed through the house.
“I’m sorry.”
“It’s fine.” You ran your hand over your face, the exhaustion of the whole day catching up with you.
“No, it’s not. I betrayed your trust over the one thing I knew you couldn’t tolerate. I knew how hurtful cheating is to you and I did it anyway. I know it’s not an excuse, but I guess I just felt like you deserved someone more than me. Someone better.”
You said nothing. You were so so tired. You missed her and it ached, but you couldn’t forget what she had done. “I can’t trust you anymore.”
“I know but please let me try again. Bruce wasn’t worth it. He only made me realise how much I love you.” Tears were filling up Natasha’s beautiful eyes and you could see just how tired she looked.
“I missed you.” You whispered out, not wanting to break whatever was being formed
“I missed you too. So so much.”
“I can’t forgive you. Not yet, but
you can have one more chance Natasha. That’s it. You get one chance at my forgiveness.”
“Okay!” Natasha sniffled slightly “I promise I won’t mess this up.”
“I’m serious Natasha. One chance. I don’t play baseball. There are no three strikes.”
Natasha gingerly reached up to cup your face. “I won’t waste this.”
“Good because I never really stopped loving you and I’d hate to be a simp.”
“I think it’s a little too late for that dove.” Natasha let out a watery laugh.
“Excuse me?” You let out a fake gasp and wiped some of the tears from her cheeks.
“It’s okay, I’ll tell you a secret.” Natasha ushered you to lean closer and you did, she tucked a strand of hair behind your ear and whispered, “I’ve been whipped for you for as long as I can remember.”
You were looking forward to all the ways Natasha was going to make it up to you and hopefully, you’d get to give Bruce a good punch too. You both knew it was going to be a long road ahead but you both felt a little more ready for what lies next.
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queenshelby · 3 years ago
Text
A Friend with Benefits (One Shot)
31 Days of Kink: Day 26
Pairing: Cillian Murphy x Reader
Warning: Smut, FFM Threesome, Breeding Kink
Words: 2,365
Notes: Alright now. I am in a same sex relationship and this is my biggest fantasy. Here you go. I hope you enjoy.
***
You and Laura have been together for five years. You recently got married and purchased your first house together and, whilst you were extremely happy, there was one thing that had been missing in your lives. A baby!
You were well aware of the fact that you wouldn’t be able to make a baby without a man and it was on a Sunday afternoon that, over several drinks at the local pub, your close mutual friend Cillian had offered his help.
‘Let me know what clinic you are going to use and I will, you know, do what has to be done’ Cillian chuckled, causing you both to laugh.
‘You know, we could just fuck. It saves everyone the hassle of going through the artificial insemination and a lot of money too’ Laura smirked, causing Cillian to choke on his pint of Guinness.
‘You mean like me with the both of you?’ Cillian asked somewhat flustered and you both looked at each other and then nodded.
‘Yes. You are single, we are willing and you really need to get laid’ Laura observed as his last date with a woman he had met at an art exhibition didn’t go very well and Cillian admitted to you both that, the last time he had sex, was six months ago.
‘Hmm, I always wanted to have a threesome with two women’ Cillian admitted, flushing cheeks as he did.
‘Well then Cilly, let’s set a date then, shall we?’ you asked and he nodded eagerly.
***
Your soft feminine mouth was pressing against Laura's as her tongue caressed yours. You both felt a little awkward being watched by someone at first but when you heard Cillian's breath deepen with arousal at the sight of you kissing each other, you started to relax in to it.
Laura then wrapped her arms around you allowing one hand to drift down to the curve of your spine while you took Laura’s bottom lip between your teeth pulling at it gently before resuming the kiss deeply and passionately.
Soon the familiar flutters in your panties began and you both yearned for each other’s touch.
But, just as you hungrily pressed into the kiss, Laura pulled away and turned to Cillian and delivered the same intense kiss, parting his lips and pressing her tongue in to his mouth as you watched on.
Laura then gestured with her head that it was now time for you and Cillian to kiss. Without losing any time, you pulled Cillian towards you, sharing the kiss you had been craving for and it was at this point that he felt his cock swelling as the thoughts of being with both, you and Laura, intruded his mind.
All of you were so turned on that the kiss was animalistic as your tongues fervently danced around one another and you both grabbed at one another aggressively, not caring if you caused the other pain before Laura had yet another turn, doing the same.
As Laura was kissing Cillian, you stepped behind her, laying your hands on her slender waist. Slowly your fingers started creeping up Laura's ribcage closing in on her chest.
Your hands stopped short just as your index fingers reached the underside of Laura's breasts and your thumbs pressed against the sides. With featherweight movement you drew your thumbs across Laura's breasts lightly brushing against her nipples.
Laura had neglected to wear a bra that evening as she had intended to tease Cillian with that fact, perhaps even accidentally let him glimpse down her shirt. Now her nipples pressed hard against her shirt clearly visible to Cillian as he broke off the kiss and watched you both put on yet another show for him.
He watched your hands stroking Laura's breasts and felt his cock springing to action in his pants. He loved the light moaning noises Laura was making as your dainty fingers flicked and pulled at her nipples unremittingly.
Cillian lifted Laura's shirt over her head admiring her perky breasts as they came into view. He stepped to the side and reached out further to repeat the action with you. You did have a bra on, a fine lacy black number which left almost nothing to the imagination. Your breasts were much larger than Laura's and the bra did an amazing job of pushing them up in a deliciously tempting way.
He reached behind and unhooked the clasp with ease. Coquettishly, you let both straps fall down your arms whilst holding the main material of the bra to still cover your breasts. Cillian looked at you directly in the eye.
‘Drop it’ he growled.
‘Yes sir’ you giggled as you let the fabric fall from your hand revealing everything. Your skin was bronzed from hours in the sun and your large firm breasts beckoned for him to touch them. He placed a hand on one feeling the weight in the palm of his hand whilst he lowered his mouth to the other. As he took your nipple in his mouth he felt it harden against his tongue.
Cillian then reached out and took Laura's hand and guided it towards your breast. There now were hands all over and you leaned in towards Laura and again began kissing her passionately as Laura grew more adventurous and lightly flicked at your nipple. Her other hand rested on the curve of your narrow waist enjoying the feeling of your womanly shape and soft feminine skin.
The removal of the remaining items of clothing was a blur and soon Cillian found himself naked, splayed horizontally across the bed with you and Laura standing at the foot. As the clothing slipped away clearly any remaining inhibitions had too. You whispered something to Laura who got on to the bed between his legs.
Her large eyes looked up at him briefly before tenderly she bent over and kissed his thigh a few inches short of where he wanted to feel her mouth. She planted another kiss and then another, slowly working upwards until her mouth reached his soft pubic hair. But instead of taking him in her mouth she skipped over his penis and ran her kisses down his other leg.
During this time, you had moved to the side of the bed and were now kneeling alongside him. In one athletic gesture you stretched out her leg, pivoting slightly until your smooth pussy was positioned just above his face.
He breathed in your sweet, intoxicating scent and stretched out his tongue to take that first tempting taste.
Almost exactly as his tongue met with your soft mound he felt Laura's tongue connect with his erection. Tantalizingly slowly Laura's tongue worked her way up his seven inches until she reached the head and plunged it in her mouth. Again, she reversed her action and made her way back down his penis until she reached his balls which she gently took in her mouth and sucked.
At the same time, Cillian’s hands were on your ass to support you as his tongue lapped at your wet opening and you bucked around. Occasionally he would push his long tongue through your pussy lips and thrust as though he was fucking you with it driving you wild. Then he would shift his focus to your clit, skilfully stroking it with his tongue.
He had a girl on his cock and another on his face. It was heaven.
‘Let’s change it up a bit and make this baby, huh’ Laura then said eagerly as she let go of his cock and let it fall from her mouth.
‘Who first?’ Cillian chuckled, as he lifted you from his face and laid you down on the bed.
‘Y/N first’ Laura said as she collapsed next to you and, after you shared another brief but seductive kiss, you climbed up on all fours, pushing your ass out towards where Cillian was kneeling.
You shifted over, between Laura’s legs while Cillian lined himself up with your entrance.
Tentatively you placed your hands on Laura’s slender, toned thighs, her thumbs turned inwards so that they almost made contact with her labia. You then brought your mouth close and softly breathed on Laura’s skin causing her to shiver involuntarily just as you could feel Cillian push his length inside of you slowly.
‘Oh god he feels good’ you groaned against Laura’s wet mound, causing all three of you to moan.
As light as a feather you traced the tip of your tongue gently up one side of Laura’s pussy hearing her moan in response all while Cillian pushed into you further and further from behind until he bottomed out against your cervix.
Then, Cillian started off with slow but firm trusts while you tried your hardest to seductively tease Laura’s velvety haven, alternating your deliberate, predictable patterns with sudden surprise moves.
‘Is he fucking you good Love?’ Laura moaned, enjoying the sight of Cillian taking you from behind while he watched you giving Laura head in the most seductive and pleasurable way.
‘So fucking good’ you moaned as Cillian picked up speed, causing you to groan and moan even louder.
‘Fill her with your cum, Cilly’ Laura moaned as she observed Cillian’s facial expressions change as he continued to thrust into you.
‘Oh my god fuck, Cillian’ you moaned, unable to pay any attention to Laura’s needs at this point as you could feel your climax approach quicker than you had expected.
It was at this point that Laura scooted up from beneath you and kneeled next to Cillian, kissing him passionately as he continued to fuck you.
‘You are making her cum Cilly, I can see it’ Laura groaned as she pulled your ass cheeks apart, giving Cillian a better view of his cock as he slid in and out of your wetness.
‘Oh my god yes that’s it’ you moaned loudly as your orgasm finally washed over you and your walls tightened around Cillian’s cock, milking his seed from him.
‘Fuck’ Cillian groaned as he reached his high only seconds after you did, filling you with rope after rope of his warm cum.
‘Hmm fuck, yes’ Laura groaned as she watched some of Cillian’s cum spill out of you and, just after he pulled out, she pushed one of her fingers into your pussy, pushing his seed further into you.
‘Jesus Laura’ Cillian huffed out, watching her play with his cum inside your pussy and, just after your breathing had returned to normal, she scooted beneath you and began pleasuring you with her tongue.
The sight of Laura licking his cum from your pussy turned Cillian on immensely and, within mere seconds, he grew hard again.
‘Common, my turn now you stud’ Laura chuckled as she spread her legs while she continued to dip her tongue into your wet folds.
Cillian was quick to line himself up in between Laura’s legs while you turned around, facing him while Laura, who was still lying beneath you, continued her attack on your cum dripping pussy.  
Without losing any time, Cillian pushed in to her tight little hole and felt the satisfaction as she cried out when his girth filled her up completely.
He fucked her slowly, watching as her enthusiasm for licking you continued to grow. She was not holding back now and he knew that her face would be wet with your juices and his cum.
Then again, Cillian watched Laura work a couple of fingers into you and focus her oral attention directly on your clit causing you to become even more feverish.
Knowing that she was having this effect on you was such a turn on and combined with the feeling of Cillian's incredible cock slipping and in and out of her she felt the familiar tension building in her body that ached for release.
As he was fucking Laura, Cillian began to rub his fingers over your clit while, ever so often, play with your breasts and kiss you.
Laura felt like she could cum at any second but continued to focus on her own work. She slipped your clit between her lips, cradling it in her tongue and sucked gently. This caused you to suddenly cry out with a shattering moan thrusting her pelvis as your orgasm overtook your body.
‘Your cum tastes so fucking good’ Laura growled after you finally moved away and took a closer look at what Cillian was doing.
‘I can’t wait to have a taste’ you moaned as you pulled Laura’s legs back, giving Cillian better access.
‘Fuck me hard now’ Laura screamed at Cillian who obliged only too willingly drilling his cock in to her so hard that a loud slapping noise filled the air. Her back arched upwards off the bed and her pussy gripped tightly at his erection as she cried out in pleasure amidst her climax.
Overwhelmed from the intensity of the sensations that had shot through it, Laura's body crumpled beneath Cillian causing his rock-hard cock to explode for a second time.
‘Oh god yes, fill her up’ you groaned as you watched Cillian come inside Laura, coating her insides with his seed until, finally, his movements came to a standstill and he pulled out.
Just as he slipped out, you lowered your head and took his hard shaft into your mouth, cleaning the cum of it and tasting Laura’s sweet juices.
‘Holy shit’ Cillian gasped as Laura sat up and joined you, taking his balls deep into her mouth while you focused on his shaft.
‘Is there more for us Mr Murphy?’ Laura then asked cheekily and Cillian couldn't take his eyes off the sight as both of you taking your turns to pleasure him.
‘Are you girls for real?’ he asked and, despite the fact that he had only just come, Cillian could feel his cock starting to stiffen again. This was going to be a long night!
***
Three weeks following your encounter, you were excited to break the news to Cillian and thank him for his efforts.
‘So, which one of you girls is pregnant then?’ he asked as you called him rather excitedly.
‘We both are you stud’ you both cheered.
‘Jesus, well, congrats ladies’ Cillian said.
‘Want to come over to celebrate?’ you then asked.
‘How does 7 o’clock sound?’ Cillian asked.
‘It’s a date’ you responded.
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hewhofightsbythesword · 3 years ago
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scotch or irish? tommy shelby x reader
warning/s: underage drinking, swearing, violence, and slight smut
 inspired by disco pigs (2001) 
A/N: I was really high when I came up this idea. Even wrote it while I was high, but I couldn’t find it the next mirning. Wasn’t sure if I really wrote it or if it was a dream. Either way, it’s here lol After like two weeks. Sowwyy 
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Tommy and y/n. y/n and Tommy. For as long as the pair can remember, that’s the way it has always been. Born only a few months apart, the two created an instant bond so strong that Aunt Polly said it would transcend through many lifetimes. And of course, Aunt Polly was never wrong in the matters of the heart. This was a friendship full of heart, romantic and platonic love for there was not one without the rest. Tommy’s mother would say to Polly, “That boy... it’s his cleverness that’ll kill him.” Martha found herself confiding in her more, so she continued, “As long as Tommy and y/n have each other... I am not worried.” And everyone knew. Everyone except Tommy and y/n.
The two had very similar minds. What one was thinking, the other was already mentally processing and vice versa. It would be almost adorable if it wasn’t so weird, as Arthur Sr. would call it. It was only weird because they were so smart. Against everybody else (even Polly at times, although she would never admit it), they were always two steps ahead.
From a young age the two understood their natural connection. For example, at the age of seven, Tommy and y/n planned to swear a vow of silence together that was planned to last a total of ten days. At first, y/n was met with slight worry from Tommy.
“We need code names! What should I call you if I need you?”
“You won’t have to need me, silly. That’s the whole point! I will already know, and so will you.” The logic was missing. They were both aware of this but none cared.
The goal was set for ten days. Not a single word was uttered between the kids or anyone else for that matter, aggravating the living hell out of those around them, especially Arthur who would’ve done anything to be a part of the joke. However, by day five, y/n broke the vow, rushing her feet as fast as they allowed a few houses down on Watery Lane.
That day she had heard a few of the older Lee boys, around Arthur’s age, speaking down on the Gypsy Shelby’s. y/n just had to tell Tommy or she was sure she would burst. It was also on day five Tommy came to two realizations: (1) He too would break their vow of silence. There was nothing worth doing if it meant he couldn’t do it with the person who understood him the most. (2) Tommy decided that same day that y/n, in her own right, was a Shelby too.
“Shelby,” he whispers to himself, only for him to hear.
At age 15, y/n was able to convince Tommy to steal a bottle of whiskey from the local pub. Her little hands shoved a piece of a paper with instructions in his direction. “Meet me here,” was all she told him with big eyes before he could even get a word in, running back to whatever held her short attention span. Unfolding the paper, Tommy could see a drawn out map of where to find the only girl who could keep young Tommy on his toes.
If anyone asked him, he would tell them all this was something he had to do. Many nights Arthur and Tommy had to go in all hours of the night looking for their father in pubs. One night in a drunken haze, Arthur Sr. takes his second born by the shoulders, causing him to be dragged onto the floor next to his father. He takes his boy by the face, shaking it a few times to show how serious he was trying to be.
“A man is meant to provide, always. Be a man, Thomas.”
y/n asked and Tommy planned to provide.
Seeing the large “X” marking the destination, it matched the location right before Tommy’s eyes. It was a beautiful far away, empty place from Watery Lane with lots of surrounding nature. It had just finished raining. y/n always did like the way the rain made the earth smell.
She notices her friend right away and runs up to him. y/n takes him by the hand. “I found my favorite tree here. Come on,” she says very nonchalantly.
Tommy shakes his head behind her. “Of course you did, Shelby. Of course you did.”
y/n often thought the world moved too slow for her liking. She always liked to be out and about. Always wild, never to be tamed. She figures that’s why she likes the Shelby’s so much. She was blessed to find a family early in her life that matched her soul. Except, she knows why she likes Tommy so much. He liked to be wild too. He moved just as fast as y/n, and he thought just as fast as her. So there was no doubt in her mind once she tasked her best friend with the alcohol that he'd deliver.
“I just took the first one I saw and ran like hell.” He presents y/n the bottle.
“Scotch whiskey,” y/n reads the label out loud before opening it. Tommy at this point began to see the trouble that she carried within her starting to stir. Confirming this intuitive feeling, y/n goes to make a quick toast like the kind she has seen her father make with Tommy’s. “To your Aunt Pol who would kill you if she ever knew, Thomas Shelby,” she groans out as she takes the first large swing with the most confidence. Even from when they were children, Tommy always wondered how so much confidence could fit in such a small body.
He takes the bottle from her to mimic her actions. “To my Aunt Polly who will find out by the week’s end.” They both laugh before Tommy takes his sip, but when he does, he takes it differently than y/n. “What the fuck, y/n. How can you even drink that shit?” He spits and coughs as he attempts to recover.
“What? I like it.” She shrugs while going for another.
At age 18, Tommy realized he loved y/n. By the time Tommy turned eighteen, it came to no surprise to anyone that he was already turning out to be a ladies man. Girls turning into young women were quick to notice his dark hair and hypnotic blue eyes. He was different than any of the factory worker boys that took after their fathers. He was ambitious. He wanted more to life than what dirty old Birmingham could offer, and the young women knew this so in some way, it even made it seem okay that his last name was Shelby. Almost as if Tommy was being pardoned for being a Shelby. And he hated that feeling.
y/n never made Tommy feel that way. She was always the first and the last one to defend her friend since birth. Crowned by Tommy all those years ago, she was Shelby. What else could have made her break her vow with Tommy all those years ago? Tommy didn’t realize exactly what he was realizing at the time. How could he? They were kids being kids. He couldn’t have known it was loyalty. If it wasn’t clear to Tommy then, it was now.
“You need to get out of here. Go get Arthur and John. This is no place for a woman,” Tommy warns y/n one night out, sensing trouble.
The two found themselves cornered by a group of boys around their age. The Peaky Blinders were gaining respect, notoriety, and fear from those around them. Things were changing for the Shelby’s, but not everyone agreed. Most certainly not the three boys looking for a fight. “Run!”
“No!” She hisses back. She tightens her fist and holds them up.
“There is no fucking way I’m letting you do this.”
“Either I leave to get the boys and we come back to your half-dead body, if we’re lucky or I stay and fight and we may actually win this.” Truth be told, y/n wished she could listen to Tommy and go get his brothers. But more than the fear she felt for herself, it was tenfold for Tommy.
“Damn you, Shelby.” he tells her as the fight breaks out.
No words were exchanged on the walk to The Garrison. It seemed like all of the day’s events were forcing Tommy to think about the vow they made when they were seven. Only this time, Tommy could see the logic she proposed. He did know what she was thinking because he was so sure she was thinking the same as him.
“Whiskey, Harry,” was all Tommy said, not bothering to spare the man a glance. y/n goes to sit at a table like they always do but was stopped by Tommy. He latches onto her hand, careful with the cuts and bruises that were beginning to form. “No,” he tells her, “We’ll be in the snug.” And no one protested. They may have wanted to but at the sight of blood on their clothes and on his razor blade, no one dared to speak out against the Blinder.
Not long after Harry delivers two glasses of whiskey through the snug’s window. “Give the toast, Shelby,” he gives the cup to y/n.
Her eyes never leave his. Even with exhaustion hijacking them, y/n could not name a more beautiful sight. “To you, Tommy. To the best and worst pal in the world.”
In his state of shock, Tommy failed to clink their glasses together, so y/n did it. The sound pulls him out of his own swirling thoughts, and they down their drink in an instant. Like the siamese twins they are, a look of disgust and twinge of horror overtake their faces.
“Scotch.”
“Irish.”
They both spit out like venom but were quick to laugh it off. “You gave me the wrong cup, Thomas!”
“Hey, come on now. I’m still Tommy. I’m just a bloody idiot for not knowing the difference.”
Only a few moments later, the laughing winds down a bit. The atmosphere still remains light only to be shattered. “Why don’t you love me?” He blurts out to y/n. “Like the way I love you?”
y/n’s content smile never falters. “I believe you have been too busy to notice me, Tommy. I’ve been right here. Because if you would have just asked, I would’ve said I loved you too. And I do... love you too.”
He smiles at her. “The best and worst pal in the world.”
y/n could feel her heart begin to hammer against her chest. She no longer felt like she was sitting down but floating. With the adrenaline from the fight gone, she should have been able to feel her wounds mark their place on her skin. But that’s not true. All she could feel was a warm, tight feeling in her chest. The boy she loved, loved her back. And no amount of irish whiskey could ever compare.
“Do you trust me?”
“With my whole heart.”
Tommy’s eyes searched y/n’s for any trace of hesitance or fraud but found none. All he could see were the eyes of the girl he loved the most. And most importantly, the girl loved him back.
He stands up to speak to Harry through the snug’s window and comes back shortly after. “Come here, Shelby.”
“Why?”
“Because I want to kiss the only girl in all of Small Heath that I love.” At that, y/n had no protests.
Their kiss was nothing less of what the two expected. It wasn't awkward. Nerve wracking, sure, but not awkward. Many nights y/n dreamt about this very moment. She dreamt how Tommy’s lips would feel against hers. She often wondered what kind of lover he was. And now she knows, leaving her with no more thoughts to wonder about.
She is the first one to pull away. “I have loved you since we were seven and you called me “Shelby” for the first time.” She places desperate kisses onto his lips, cheeks, and neck. Anywhere they would fall, really, leaving traces of pure love behind.
Tommy feels like he is starting to lose control once her pillow soft lips attack his neck. “Tell me again, y/n. Let me hear you.”
“I love you,” She reminds him in between her kisses.
“Shelby... if you keep doing that, I’m not sure how much gentleman will be left in me.”
She looks up from the spot on his neck she was loving on, having found his sweet spot. “This one? Right here?” She asks, feigning innocence as she lightly bites down. When she hears his soft moan, her tongue laps at the spot relieving it only to finish off with a few kisses.
Before the last one can even land, Tommy’s hand finds her neck to take control once more. He doesn’t squeeze nor does he have a rough hold. He merely wraps his fingers around the neck he will one day dress in the biggest jewels. Tommy guides y/n to the edge of the table and pushes her to lay on it.
“Here, Tommy?” She giggles watching her best friends crawl on top of her
He shushes her with more wet kisses. “No one will come in. It’s just me and you.” His hands caress, squeeze, and tease whatever he can.
“It’s yours, Tommy, my heart. It’s all yours.”
He wraps his hand under her hair that was sprawled over the table into a makeshift ponytail. “Mine,” he proves when he finally feels all of her. His eyes never hers, wanting to sear the memory of the exact moment she became his. Pain overtakes her face but her hands on his lower back right above his ass lets him know she was okay. After a while, y/n signals Tommy to start moving once more and pain starts to transform into a pleasure y/n never thought was possible.
All the sounds the two were making were sure to be drowned out by the ruckus made by the drunk men just outside the snug. Tommy was sure to tell Harry that no one else was allowed in under any circumstances. In his moment of euphoria, Tommy was ready to wet his razor blade for the second time that night should anyone dare barge in and take a look at what belonged to him.
This wasn’t Tommy’s first time but it was the first time he realized all what sex could be. All the men in his life were wrong. He was wrong. It didn’t have to be all what they said it should. All he ever needed was y/n. Now that he had her, he had no intention of ever letting go.
Basking in the momentary afterglow of his best orgasm, he says, “You know what, Shelby? I don’t think I mind scotch whiskey all that much anymore,” his thumb traces y/n lower lip, even getting it slightly moist, “Not when the taste comes from your lips. My lips.”
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xanthippe74 · 4 years ago
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Drarry ficlet: Momento mei
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2399 words | general audiences | angst with a happy ending
Thanks to @glittering-git for the beta!
Read below or on AO3 here.
Memento mei
It seemed like a blessing at first.
In the months after the war ended, the articles chronicling Harry’s deeds in the Prophet slowly waned from full pages of lavish words and photographs, to barely a mention of his name. Harry felt lighter for it, free. By the time the first term back at Hogwarts was almost over, he could go to Hogsmeade without worrying about flash bulbs startling him every time he stepped out of a shop.
“They finally got tired of you, mate,” Ron said with a laugh as they trudged back to the school after a morning of Christmas shopping. Harry scooped up a handful of snow and rubbed it, none too gently, into Ron’s grinning face.
Harry and Ginny’s break-up didn’t get so much as a mention, even in Rita Skeeter’s gossip column, which had been relegated to an ignominious corner ten pages back from the front page. When he came out as bisexual and briefly dated Terry Boot that spring, he braced himself for a fresh round of publicity. It never materialised.
Harry looked in the mirror of the eighth-year boys’ bathroom and found he was truly comfortable in his own skin for the first time. His life wasn’t going to be scrutinised and dissected for public consumption anymore. The people around him didn’t think he was a freak or a waste of space.
One year after the war, with a handful of NEWTs to his name, Harry was at a loss for what to do next. There was no particular career he felt inclined to pursue, so he put his energy into renovating Grimmauld Place and spending time with his godson. He wondered at times why no one had offered him a job—Ron and Hermione had been deluged with letters—but he never mentioned it to anyone. It would have sounded awfully big-headed to expect anything to be handed to him like that, much less complain about it. While his friends began training programmes and apprenticeships, Harry Vanished broken furniture and stripped mildewy wallpaper off the walls. On the weekends, he met the usual Hogwarts gang for pub night or a party in someone’s cramped flat.
Harry looked in the mirror on his way out to meet his friends, giving his hair one last check. Maybe he’d meet someone new tonight. He winked at his reflection before leaving his newly-renovated bedroom.
Two years after the war, Harry didn’t think twice about walking through Diagon Alley on a busy Saturday. There were no stares or requests for autographs, no whispers when he paused to look into a shop window. He met friends for leisurely lunches. He ate ice cream at a table in front of Fortescue’s and watched people strolling by in the summer sunshine. Once, Harry walked the entire length of Diagon without realising that George had flicked a spell at the back of his head as he’d left the joke shop.
Harry looked in the mirror when he got home and was bemused by the things that didn’t warrant a second glance in the magical world, like hair that shifted between purple and orange every five seconds. He went over to Andromeda’s house to show Teddy, who laughed to see his godfather’s hair change colours like his did.
Three years after the war, Harry’s friends started forgetting to invite him to things. At first, they laughed it off as absentmindedness or a simple oversight. “I’m sorry, Harry! It must have slipped my mind,” was an excuse he began to hear more and more often. And then they began to look confused when he confronted them, like it was strange for Harry to expect to be included at all. As the months went by, the hosts of the get-togethers weren’t the only offenders—not a single person seemed to notice when Harry didn’t show up for something. When he mentioned it later, they would only lament all the fun he’d missed out on. His frustration curdled into self-pity.
Harry looked in the mirror the day he found out he’d missed Lavender’s engagement party, studying his unremarkable features and the unremarkable haircut he’d had since he was eighteen. Was he really so boring and unimportant that nobody thought about him much anymore? He didn’t mind in the least that the wizarding world wasn’t fawning over him, but it cut deeply that the people dearest to him no longer seemed to want or need his company.
It was only when his closest friends stopped recognising him that Harry began to suspect that something was terribly wrong. The first one was Luna, but she was often so lost in her own thoughts that it didn’t strike him as odd that she’d drifted past him in Diagon without saying hello. Then Molly looked at him blankly one day when he arrived at the Burrow for Sunday roast, as if Harry were a stranger who’d wandered in by accident. Thankfully, Ron was passing through the kitchen and greeted him as he usually did. Molly gave herself a little shake and ushered them both into the lounge.
Four years after the war ended, Minister for Magic Kingsley Shacklebolt didn’t mention Harry’s name in his speech commemorating the Battle of Hogwarts.
Hagrid didn’t invite Harry to tea for his birthday, as he did every year.
And when Harry popped into Neville’s flower shop to wish him happy birthday, Neville responded to his greeting with a baffled look. Harry watched in horror as he turned to Hannah and mouthed the words, “Who’s that?”
Harry spun on his heel and went right back out the door.
Either he was going mad or everyone else was. He walked around London for half the night, unable to think straight. The city was a vast ocean, and Harry felt like a small boat that had been set adrift, tossed around by waves of panic. When he was calmer, he decided to turn to the two people he knew he could always count on for help.
On his twenty-second birthday, Harry woke up on his sofa and rushed to the Floo to call Hermione before she left for work. He was flooded with relief when he heard footsteps approaching the fireplace. Ron’s face appeared in the flames—and immediately twisted into anger when he saw Harry.
“How did you get this address? Who let you into our wards? Get out!”
Harry sat on the floor for a long time after Ron had slammed the Floo connection closed.
Alone. Alone. Alone.
Oh, god—Teddy. Harry scrambled to his feet. Would Teddy shy away from Harry as he would from a stranger, the next time they saw each other? He stumbled up the stairs and dry heaved over the toilet.
Harry looked in the mirror and prodded his chalky face with his forefinger. Did he look unrecognisable to everyone but himself now? Did they see a different face, a different person when they looked at him? Or were they all under some kind of spell that erased their memories?
How had he been forgotten by everyone who loved him?
Forgotten.
You will be forgotten.
The phrase echoed in Harry’s head, causing him to sink down onto the bathroom floor. Over four years ago he’d heard those very words, snarled by a Death Eater as she’d been dragged out of the Great Hall by Aurors after the final battle. Harry had been so exhausted that the dank weight of her magic settling upon him had immediately vanished from his mind.
“The Dark Lord will always be remembered! But you will not, Harry Potter. You are nothing compared to him—utterly insignificant! You will be forgotten!”
Harry went to St Mungo’s to see the Healers, who shook their heads at the young man who insisted he was supposed to be famous. When they couldn’t fix him, they called in an Unspeakable who specialised in breaking obscure curses. After an hour of waiting, a man in hooded grey robes swept into the examining room. He didn’t show the slightest sign of recognition when he introduced himself to Harry as Unspeakable Malfoy.
Harry looked in the mirror above the sink while Malfoy cast diagnostic spells at him. He tried not to cry.
Malfoy didn’t make any promises when he was done with his spells, the results of which he recorded in a small notebook. He promised to send an owl if he found anything and asked for Harry’s name again so he could write it down.
If Malfoy couldn’t fix this, Harry decided on his walk home, he’d have to leave England. If he went someplace where no one had heard of him, they couldn’t forget him, right? The tears he’d held back at St Mungo’s slid down his cheeks as he thought about how much he’d gained, and now lost, since his eleventh birthday. Maybe he didn’t have the most exciting life or a career to boast about, but there were people who loved him. There were happy times and an old house that he’d turned into a home with his own hands.
Harry went back to Grimmauld Place and waited for word from Malfoy. He paced through the high-ceilinged rooms and climbed the long flights of stairs until his legs ached. He caught himself holding his breath, listening for a knock on the door or the roar of the Floo. When they never came, he went out to the back garden instead and lay on its small rectangle of grass. He considered where he might go—California or New Zealand. Or maybe some South Pacific island where it never got cold.
At last, Malfoy’s owl arrived four days after he had examined Harry. He’d identified the curse and, more importantly, found the countercurse.
Back at St Mungo’s, Malfoy greeted Harry coolly and ordered him into a chair. The countercurse was a droning chant in a language that Harry didn’t recognise, accompanied by complex wand motions that made him dizzy to watch. He closed his eyes until it was over, hardly able to breathe.
When the casting was finished and the room silent again, Harry opened his eyes and found Malfoy gaping at him.
“Potter? What the hell?” Malfoy looked over at his notes on the table, then back at Harry, his eyes widening even further. Then he said, faintly, “Well, Scarhead, that was quite the predicament you got yourself—”
He didn’t get the chance to finish. Harry launched himself out of the chair and crushed Malfoy in a hug, laughing tearfully into the shoulder of his Unspeakable robes.
“Gracious, Potter, a simple thank-you would suffice.” Malfoy wriggled out of Harry’s arms and stepped back to cast a diagnostic spell at him. “Do you feel any different?”
Harry thought about it for a moment. “Not really. Lighter, maybe?”
“You’re probably just relieved to be famous again,” Malfoy said, rolling his eyes. “It must have been terrible not to see your own picture in the newspaper every day.”
“No, that part was actually nice. It was having my friends not even recognise me anymore
”
The rest of the words got caught in Harry’s throat. Malfoy’s expression turned sympathetic, and when he spoke again, it was with surprising gentleness.
“Well, then. I suppose you’d better go see them now, hmm?”
He accompanied Harry to the Floo in the reception area. Harry tried to glance at him as they walked, but he’d pulled up his hood to hide his face from the other people in the corridor. No wonder Harry hadn’t heard anything about Malfoy in the past few years—he’d buried himself in the depths of the Ministry, learning to undo Dark curses.
And letting the wizarding world forget him, Harry thought with a pang.
Harry shook Malfoy’s hand and thanked him. Whatever happened next, he knew he wouldn’t stop thinking about Malfoy, with his sharp gaze and clever mind, anytime soon. Malfoy, too, seemed to consider Harry for a few long moments before he stepped into the Floo.
This time, the only reason why Hermione and Ron were surprised to see Harry was because they weren’t expecting him on a Thursday evening as they were squabbling over what to make for dinner. He almost started crying again when Ron cuffed him on the shoulder and asked him if he wanted a beer.
Hermione noticed that he was upset first, of course. When Harry explained the curse, she blamed herself for not catching that something was wrong. Ron looked towards the pictures on the mantelpiece and swore under his breath. There weren’t any pictures of Harry there.
The good parts of Harry’s life returned to normal after that, and he was almost bursting with renewed gratitude for the people around him. Diagon was off limits again, since the vultures at the Prophet remembered to hound him, but that was a small price to pay. Harry threw himself a belated birthday party in Grimmauld Place, and the rooms were filled with music and laughter and shouted toasts in his honour. He never wanted the night to end.
Harry looked in the mirror before going to bed in the wee small hours, and he smiled with contentment at his bleary eyes and the glitter caught in his hair.
He’d invited Malfoy to the party on a whim, but received a polite note declining. Harry tried again and again—a Seekers game? Lunch in Muggle London? Tea at Grimmauld Place?—until Malfoy finally gave in. He showed up on Harry’s doorstep in jeans and a soft, well-fitted jumper. Harry found himself staring.
“Did you forget that you asked me to dinner, Potter?” Malfoy smirked.
“Oh, no,” Harry breathed. “How could I forget you?”
*  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *
Five years after the war ended, Harry spends his Saturdays teaching Teddy how to fly on his first broom and Sundays being climbed on by two or three small Weasleys who know he keeps sweets in pockets. He orders Christmas gifts by owl post to avoid star-struck witches in the Diagon shops. He slips into the Leaky Cauldron under his invisibility cloak to meet his friends for drinks.
And when Draco reads out the ridiculous articles about him from the Daily Prophet, Harry chucks the crusts of his toast across the breakfast table at his boyfriend and says he almost forgot how much of a prat he could be.
“You didn’t forget anything,” Draco says pointedly.
And Harry has to agree. He didn’t.
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thinkingoutlouddblog · 4 years ago
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butterfly effect: one
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His mouth is slightly ajar, surely shocked to be seeing the girl of his past so far from where he had left her. I myself try to compute what I am seeing, but my brain is running so fast from the adrenaline, the gravity of what is occurring hardly registers.
It’s Harry, and he’s here and the two of you need to get out of there right now.
Word Count: 6k+
Includes: mob!h, mentions of blood, scary dudes late at night, and the set up for my favourite story I’ve ever written!
A/N: guys I am so excited about this story! I swear writing this is the only thing holding me together (so don’t let it flop lmao). It is 2AM pray for me.
My inbox is open for anyone who wants to chat about this series! I love to gab, and constructive criticism is very much appreciated. I want this to be as good as possible!!
butterfly effect masterlist // my masterlist
now
It is not until it is already too late that I realise I should have just ordered an uber.
Alex was very insistent that I order one home from my late shift at the pub. He had even offered to split the cost, knowing without needing to ask this was the cause of my hesitation. It wasn’t that I couldn’t afford it. Strictly speaking, I could. I was just keenly aware of the amount of material I could buy with the amount a late night uber in London would cost me. I would never take him up on his offer. He needed the money just as much as I did.
“It’s okay, I’m good for it,” I gave him a little smile. He was sitting in front of his mirror in his room, midway through getting ready for work. I had simply come to say goodbye before I left for my shift when he had grabbed me by the hand and demanded I ordered an uber home.
“Babe, you have to promise me.”
“I promise!” I stared exaggeratedly into his eyes as I spoke, emphasising my honesty.
In that moment, I made peace with the money I would be losing from my fabric budget. I calculated this budget, of course, by subtracting living expenses from my weekly income. My best friend wanted to make sure I got home safe, wanted the peace of mind while he was working that I would be fine. Who was I to say no to that?
“Make sure you text me when you get into the uber and once you make it up to the apartment.” My chest flooded with warmth at the love and care in his voice. It was moments like these I really sat back and thanked my lucky stars that Alex was in my life.
So, of course I was just going to bite the bullet and order the uber. Of course.
Except, well.
I couldn’t help but think how quickly I got from our place to work. We had picked the apartment just one short month ago, heavily considering the advantage of its walking distance to my work. The King’s Arms was just one block up and down the road. It was barely a fifteen-minute walk. Shorter than that if I took the shortcut down the alleyway back to our block, saving me from walking further down the road and looping back around. It would probably take me longer to get home via uber, once you account for the time spent waiting for it to arrive.
A ten-minute walk home wouldn’t kill me, surely.
The contemplation was pushed from my mind for the duration of my busy Saturday night shift. It was my least favourite shift of the week, as I spent each week chasing after middle aged men getting rowdy in the excitement of watching whatever sport was on TV. The King’s Arm was small, but it was a local favourite known for its homey pub meals, reasonably priced pints and good atmosphere. Much to my contempt they didn’t keep a large staff pool, preferring a smaller, well-trained, reliable bunch. Which was great in theory until it left me to run around like my hair is on fire on a night as busy as tonight.
I was capable of serving everyone well and in a timely manner, but it wasn’t exactly a stroll in the park. More like a seven-hour long sprint, with a half hour break in the middle.
As the final game for the night ended, the crowd slowly but surely thinned until just a couple of small groups remained.
“Hey y/n, are you okay to lock up by yourself if I head home in five?” my manager, Rachel asked me half an hour before close. “I have some time I need to take back,” she added in explanation.
“Of course, you go get out of here.” I knew she wasn’t lying when she said she had some time to take back, putting in all sorts of extra hours to keep the place in tip top shape. I liked Nicola, and I had certainly been working there long enough to handle a couple of customers and lock up by myself. Even if I didn’t like Rachel and thought she was slacking off, I couldn’t exactly argue. She was both my boss and the owner’s daughter, probably not far off becoming the owner herself.
“Are you sure?” She asked, eyeing the few men still seated, probably triple checking she didn’t think they were any kind of threat.
“Yes,” I laughed, “now scram, before I change my mind.”
“Alright if you insist,” she said, already making her way towards her bag.
“Ring me if you need anything! Good night!” She called over her shoulder as she exited through the kitchen door. The cook had gone home ten minutes earlier, the pub serving only drinks the hour before close at midnight.
“Night!” I called back.
I made quick work of what little cleaning there was left to do, and gently reminded the remaining patrons we closed in half an hour. To my surprise they were agreeable and friendly, one of them instantly assuring me, “Don’t worry love we’ll be out of your hair soon, won’t make you stay back late.”
Usually the kind of people that were in the pub this late had no care for closing time, believing that pertained simply to whenever they decided they wanted to leave.
True to his word, everyone was out with ten minutes to spare and I was able to clean their dishes and tables with the remaining time they had granted me. I locked the door to The King’s Arms at 12 o’clock on the dot and riding the high of such an easy close, took not a moment in deciding I was in fact going to walk home.
To Alex: Just ordered an uber!
I felt guilty lying, but I would rather lie than have Alex worrying over nothing. I would be home in a flash, keys secured firmly in between my knuckles the whole way. I felt far safer on the move than waiting out the front of work for an uber anyway.
I kept a fast pace, left only to debate whether I took my shortcut or stuck to the street. I checked over my shoulder, and seeing absolutely no one around, made a quick right turn into the alleyway between two buildings.
I grabbed my phone from my back pocket as I heard the ding of a text notification. I glance down at my screen, reading as I walk.
From Alex: Amazing! I should be home in a couple hours, text me when you get home safe. Love you x
I don’t register the hushed growling tones as I continue making my way down the alley, still looking down at my phone as I type a simple ‘love you’ in reply. It isn’t uncommon to hear the conversations of tenants on the lower levels of these apartment buildings as you walk down the street. Walls are thin and many windows generally left open. It is easy to consign this particular conversation among the other non-threatening city sounds until I eventually look back up from my phone.
I am immediately faced with a most unfavourable scene, under the single light that illuminates this alley, are the two men who I now recognise to be the source of the argument I had barely registered. The first man is tall, dressed in all black, thick muscles protruding through his t-shirt. He towered over the second man who contrasted him starkly in his bright red adidas tracksuit. The tall man’s presence would be dominating the space, even if he didn’t have his dark forearm pressed firmly against the smaller man’s throat.
I clamp a hand over my mouth, stopping myself from yelping stupidly and drawing attention to myself. They haven’t noticed my presence. A witness to whatever it was that was occurring here.
“See all I’m hearing is excuses, bruv,” the tall man’s accent is distinctly that of someone from South London. His tone is aggressive, but even. He knows he has the upper hand and it is clearly not his first rodeo threatening people. This is exactly the kind of person I could’ve avoided encountering by simply ordering an uber.
I snap out of my shocked daze and start to turn to make a swift and stealthy departure. I’m no fool. I know there is a definitive gang presence around here. I also know, if you leave them alone, they too shall (hopefully)leave you. All hopes of making such an exit are of course foiled as soon as my foot connects with an empty beer bottle on my first step.
The two men’s heads snap towards me instantly. I expect the shorter man to ask for help, to say something, but his mouth remains clamped shut. Gang business. He is in a bigger mess than someone like me can ever save him from. The taller man’s eyes narrow. After the briefest moments of standing there frozen, caught, I spin on my heel and run as fast as my feet can carry me.
I run back to the route I should have taken, cursing myself all the way for being naĂŻve enough to believe that nothing bad could happen to me on something as simple as a walk home from work. That women who were raped, kidnapped and murdered from off the street were somehow removed from me. That was something only on the news in my world. Not something that was possibly about to occur.
My heart hammers in my chest as I make the split-second decision, I am safer running all the way home than running as far as I can from the scene of the crime. I’m going to run all the way up the stairs to my fifth-floor apartment, and I am going to lock the door behind me. I turn the corner back up to my block, not slowing down for a second.
I am so quick in fact, that as I come flying around the next corner towards my apartment, I nearly barrel straight into someone. He was clearly walking with some pace too, because he narrowly prevents us crashing into each other head on, but he is a second too slow in his reaction time because I trip straight over his feet. I hardly even see him, even as I am falling straight over him. All I see is brown hair and a dark suit before I’m staring straight at the pavement flying towards my face. I barely manage to throw my forearms out to break my fall as I hit the pavement at speed.
“Jesus,” the man mutters, but the only thing I can hear is my heavy breathing and my own blood pounding in my ears.
I’m on the ground now, I register for a second before my flight response kicks back in.
I don’t even feel the sting of the scrapes with the adrenaline coursing through me, already attempting to scramble up and get as far away as possible from this stranger. “I’m so sorry!” I manage to call as I pick myself and my keys up, gearing up to get moving once more.
“Honey?”
No. It absolutely could not possibly be. There was only one person on this planet who had ever called me by that name.
I stop dead in my tracks. That voice. It’s deeper than I remember but undoubtedly familiar. Familiar seems too simple a word. That voice had echoed around the halls of my brain for years. Even now, six years later, it was not gone but buried, waiting for a simple trigger to spark my memory and bring that beautiful sound back to the forefront my mind. Some days I swear I remembered it like I had just heard it moments ago.
Except now, I really had heard him.
Slowly, I turned to face him.
His mouth is slightly ajar, surely shocked to be seeing the girl of his past so far from where he had left her. I myself try to compute what I am seeing, but my brain is running so fast from the adrenaline, the gravity of what is occurring hardly registers.
It’s Harry, and he’s here and the two of you need to get out of there right now.
Before he can verbalise any of the questions on the tip of his tongue, I grab his hand in my own, and yank him forward as I continue running home.
Realistically, I know that we now outnumber whoever it was that may be coming after me and I know even six years since I’ve last seen him, I am always safe with Harry. He proved that in many ways, and more than once, while I knew him. I was not, however, willing to risk the tall man pulling a knife on Harry. I didn’t even want to put him in a situation where it was a battle of fists. Though I did know from experience he could more than hold his own.
“What’s going on?” he yells as we run down the street, rapidly approaching the exit of the alleyway I had fled.
I gradually reduce our pace until we are speed-walking past the alleyway. Tempted as I am to see if they are still there, I keep my eyes trained forward, praying they aren’t there watching us as we pass by.
As soon as we have cleared it, I’m straight back to my running pace, forcing Harry to accelerate speed once more.
“I’ll explain inside,” I call over my shoulder in answer to his earlier question.
Now that I felt a degree safer with Harry’s presence, I had the capacity to feel thankful I had opted for a boiler suit and converse for tonight to accommodate for the Saturday night rush. This run would have been hell if I had worn a skirt and a heeled boot instead.
“Inside where?” He’s laughing as he speaks and as the fear loosens its grip on me, the dĂ©jĂ  vu begins to battle for dominance. That laugh had brightened my every day for long enough to leave a mark on my soul. Fleeting as it was, that single sound reignited the shine it had once left.
His question was answered when we came to a screeching halt in front of my apartment. It took me two tries to input my security code correctly, my brain and hands both moving quickly, but not quite matching up. Eventually, the door clicked, and I was able to swing it open, tugging Harry in after me.
I didn’t stop dragging him along behind me until we had taken all five flights of stairs up to my apartment two at a time.
“y/n
” he attempted to grab my attention when we first entered the building, but I was not to be deterred until we had reached the absolute safety of my apartment. I shushed him, not wanting to receive a noise complaint from my new neighbours. I supposed having such a thought was a good sign, my consciousness beginning to register it was not in any imminent danger.
I huffed and puffed as we landed at the doorstep of apartment 5B, the place I loved to call home. Harry, I noticed, was barely short of breath. He had always been a runner when we were in high school. I wondered if he kept up the habit even now.
My hands shook as I located the correct key on my chain, body still shaking from the excitement of the events of the past five minutes. I struggled to align the key with the lock with my left hand, unthinking of the fact my right was still firmly in Harry’s hold.
“Let me,” he murmured, already moving his right hand to take the key. I said nothing, simply surrendering it over to him.
His hands were steady as anything as he turned the key, granting us entrance into my home. I released a breath I didn’t realise I had been holding. I finally stopped just past the door, my back to Harry as he shut it behind him. I took a few deep breaths, trying so desperately to ground myself.
Was any of this even real? The sketchy characters I could believe in a heartbeat, Harry Styles’ presence, however, was harder to grasp.
But there his hand was, in my own, even if I couldn’t see him.
Harry stood back and let me take this moment to myself, keenly aware of how much I needed it. He knew I needed to take pause and re-centre myself otherwise I would only shut down. He was also aware of my injured state though, even if I wasn’t.
“y/n, you’re bleeding.”
“Oh,” my head snapped back to look at my arm. In the rush to get home, the blood from the scrapes on my arm had run down my arm and dripped into our connected hands. I quickly released my grasp on him. “Jesus, I’m sorry.”
“A little bit of blood never hurt anyone,” he quickly dismissed. “Unless you’re the one that’s bleeding, in which case you better get cleaned up as soon as possible.
“Luckily you have me here to play nurse. Just lead the way to the nearest bathroom,” he gave me a little cheeky grin, clearly trying to lift your spirits. The subtle playfulness is not as natural as it once was, but it is certainly reminiscent of our old dynamic. The surrealism of this whole thing goes straight to my head, clouding my ability to form full, coherent thoughts.
Somehow, I manage to come out with, “I think you mean our only bathroom,” in response.
He grunts a laugh, but he hasn’t missed the use of the word our.
I walk like a zombie, leading him through the hallway past the living room and the kitchen to the bathroom. I hold my forearms up in an attempt to redirect the flow of the blood and prevent it from dripping from my fingertips onto the floor. As I slowly came out of survival mode, my awareness of the stinging of my forearms became increasingly prominent. I was sure my hip and knees were going to be bruised pretty badly too. I really hadn’t managed to slow down at all before all my momentum came crashing into the cement.
“Do you have a first aid kit?” He asks upon our arrival to the bathroom.
“Under the sink.”
My eyes trail over the mess Alex and I had left in our rush to get ready.
I tend to procrastinate getting ready for as long as possible, busying myself with just about anything else. Generally, it will be tidying up the mess I’ve made during the day, only for me to create a whole new one in my hurry to get ready for my shift on time. Alex on the other hand, always leaves plenty of time to perfect his look before leaving for the night. Despite having the time to do so, he never cleans as he goes. Leaving his many products and deliberated outfits spread far and wide. Luckily most of his mess was confined to his bedroom, the only trace of him in the bathroom skincare and hair products (though there wasn’t a limited amount of those, either).
“I’m sorry for the mess,” I speak quietly watching Harry get his bearings, standing helplessly as I bled, hands still raised.
“Nonsense,” he doesn’t look at me as he speaks, jumping into action.
Harry turns the faucet on in the sink before opening the cupboard door and grabbing the first aid kid out. It was actually sort of a miracle Alex and I had one. It had been on a list of “Things You Need for a New Apartment” I had googled, scared we were missing important things. At the time, I had deliberated longer than necessary over whether to get one. I couldn’t remember the last time I had required anything more than a band aid for any given ailment. The deciding factor had been the memory of Alex getting into a couple of scrapes while out over the years. It had never been anything major, the worst injury he ever sustained being a bruised jaw, but it was better to be safe than sorry, I decided.
Turns out, that decision was for the best.
He gently touches his fingertips to my right arm, which had copped the brunt of it. With the softest touch, he delicately guided my arm under the stream of water. As I stepped forward to lean over the sink and wash away the dirt of the footpath, he stepped backwards, giving me my space.
I winced at the initial contact of the water as it ran red. I risked a glance at my reflection. Sweaty brow, the light lazy work makeup I had applied half off my face. I quickly diverted my gaze back to my injured arm. This was not exactly how I pictured our reunion. I had hardly ever even pictured it, I was so sure that I would never see Harry again.
I wondered if this silence was as heavy as I thought it was. Everything about him felt so familiar, yet so different. Up until this moment it felt like being in the presence of a friend, but now I realised, he was closer to a stranger.
I knew the person he once was, a sweet but fucked up kid who had been forced to become a man too early. Someone who had his walls a mile high around almost everyone. Almost. The boy who painted his nails on lunch breaks and was friends with everyone but somehow also no one. Until he was friends with me. Then he was the boy who always sat to my left from the first bell of the school day to the last. Back then, I knew him from the inside out, just as he knew me.
He was my greatest joy of those years. Then he was my greatest heartbreak. Now, he was just some guy I used to know who I had plucked straight up off the street, looking very out of place in what was clearly a designer suit in my tiny apartment.
He looked through the first aid kit as I ensured the entirety of the scrape was rinsed. It extended most of the way from my elbow to my wrist, but more pressingly in my mind, it now stung like a bitch. Once the water rain clear as it ran off my arm, I moved onto the much smaller and shallower scrape on my left elbow, working quickly to get it clean.
Most of the bleeding had stopped, only a few spots on my right arm still dotting with blood. I leaned over the sink to prevent the water from dripping onto the floor.
I cleared my throat, nervous to break the silence.
“Can you please grab me that towel?” I nodded my head towards the black hand towel hung behind Harry.
His eyes snapped upwards from the first aid kit he had been busying himself with. I was sure he had been surveying it more thoroughly than strictly necessary, trying to detract from the awkward energy which had crept up on us. We made brief eye contact through the mirror. My breath caught in my throat. The moment was over as soon as it began as he turned wordlessly to grab the towel.
He holds it in his hand, hesitating before handing it over, “Did you want me to
?” he trails off, growing awkward in his offer. He regretted the words as soon as they were out of his mouth. She barely knows you, back off, he tells himself.
“No that’s okay,” I speak gently, and he quickly passes the towel to me. I get to work patting my arms down delicately.
“Thank you though,” I add, hating the unsure look on his face. I meet his eye, giving him a smile I hope is reassuring.
“Okay, let’s get you sitting down so I can fix you up,” he returns your smile with a slight upturn of the right side of his mouth.
I relocate to the little dining table Alex and I had bought at Ikea just a week prior. Harry isn’t far behind, washing his hands before joining me to tend to my wounds. He lays out everything he is going to need from the first aid kit before holding his hand out. Like an idiot, I stare at his hand without moving for a beat too long before jerkily offering my right arm up.
He laughs silently as he turns my arm over, analysing it carefully.
“So, do you often go for runs at midnight?” He asks as he unscrews the lid on the Vaseline.
“Yeah all the time. I just don’t normally take people from the street with me.”
“Is that all I am? A person on the street?” He tries to keep his tone light, but I can tell he was hurt by my choice of words.
I expect to feel guilty, but a burst of anger I thought I had long gotten over flares in my chest. It isn’t as red hot and overwhelming as it had been years before – I’d definitely had my fair share of time to cool off – but I’m still surprised by the sting of it.
He was the one that made himself a stranger to me, and now he’s upset when I’m stating the fact that he made a reality.
Despite myself, I tried not to come across too harshly in my response. I was never one for confrontation.
“I mean, I haven’t heard from you in six years.”
He is very careful not to lift his eyes from my injuries as he carefully applies the petroleum jelly. I stare down at him, desperate to catch his eye.
There’s a pause as I wait for him to offer some kind of explanation. Some perfectly good reason why my best friend and first love left town without telling me why, or where he was going, and then never contacted me again.
When he doesn’t fill the silence, I sigh as quietly as I can manage. You don’t really know him, I remind myself. I practically kidnapped him, I can’t just go asking him to rehash history. It was so clear that he was what he had wanted me to be. History.
“I just mean, I don’t really know you anymore. I’m sorry I grabbed you like that, I just,” I hissed at the sting of his first aid, “I was walking home from work and I saw these really sketchy looking guys.”
“Sketchy looking?” He finally looked up at me, raising an eyebrow questioningly.
“Well I guess they didn’t really look sketchy in their appearance particularly, it was more the fact that one of them was practically choking the other. They were arguing over something. I think it was something to do with some of the gangs around here,” I attempted a nonchalant tone, not wanting to worry him. The less phased I seemed, the better. I had caused him enough trouble. The only thing that was probably stopping him from running for the hills and never looking back (again) was guilt.
I go on to explain how I’d kicked that stupid beer bottle and taken off running, “which is when I ran into you. I’m really sorry about that, by the way. I’m so glad I didn’t take you down with me I think I would’ve died of a mix of guilt and embarrassment right then and there.”
“It wasn’t your fault, Ho-“he cut himself before his mouth could form that name he had so affectionately given you. “I’m the one who feels guilty, if not for my big, slow feet you wouldn’t have bit the dust.” I laugh at his turn of phrase.
His face suddenly grows serious. “Your head is okay, right?”
Instinctively, my left hand shoots up to the back of my head, ghosting over the slight bump hidden under my hair. The scar tissue was ever so minimally raised, only perceptible to a knowing touch. I retract my hand bashfully, slightly embarrassed by my knee jerk reaction.
“It’s fine,” I match his serious tone, before lightening it up, “as you can see, I managed to break most of my fall,” I gesture to my right arm he has paused work on.
He holds my gaze for a moment longer, discerning whether he thinks I am downplaying anything. He picks up the dressing, moving onto the next phase of his treatment plan.
“And they don’t feel broken? You can move your wrists okay without too much pain?”
My heart swells at his concern. I stamp out the small joy as soon as it flared up. It’s guilt that’s fuelling him. Nothing else.
I shake my head no. He looks up once more, having missed the gesture in his concentration. “Sorry! No. All bumps and bruises. I’m fine honestly, I probably majorly overexaggerated the whole thing and freaked out for nothing. I’m really sorry about all this, its so late at night.”
“Don’t apologise,” he says firmly. “It’s not your fault and you did exactly the right thing by making a break fo’ it. You never know what could’ve happened. Ya’ know. Out late. By yourself. In the dark.”
My face burned red with shame, but also defiance. I knew what I did was stupid and extremely risky, but I also didn’t think I needed a lecture about it in this moment. The fear still coursing through me and my scraped-up arms were surely lesson enough.
“I could say the same thing to you,” I countered.
We both knew my argument didn’t hold up very well. He was a man out alone at night. There was obviously a risk there, but it wasn’t the same.
We also both knew, I wasn’t really trying to start a debate. Just signalling to him I didn’t want to get into it and wanted to move on.
“I was walking to the tube from a mate’s place,” he explained simply, letting me off the hook.
He had begun to tape the dressing down to my skin, securing it safely. He worked expertly. Even if I didn’t already know, I would have said this was one of many times he had done some at home first aid.
“In a designer suit?” I questioned. There were two things I was asking, but also not saying. Was this the kind of ‘mate’ you wine and dine before going home with them? And what happened to that poor kid from Holmes Chapel I once knew?
“I came straight from work.”
Jesus he wasn’t giving me a lot to work with in the way of details.
“Oh,” I say lamely, not wanting to pry. As much as I could tell myself (and him) that I didn’t really know him anymore and he was basically a stranger, it still hurt to be treated like one. We used to be so open with one another. The one thing I ever kept from him was how I truly felt about him.
“I work in finance,” he offers up after a beat of silence. “It uh- I’m pretty lucky to have the job I do,” he alludes to his financial standing, obviously wanting to acknowledge the contrast comparative to how I knew him. A boy not even of eighteen, fending for himself while trying to complete his high school education.
My face practically split in two with the size of the smile on my face at his words. “I’m so happy for you, Harry,” I say, hoping he can see how genuinely I mean it.
“Thank you.”
“Are you happy, H?” The question slips out before I can stop it. Internally, I kick myself. Externally, I try to keep my face neutral, yet interested. That’s a perfectly normal question to ask. Totally.
“Um,” he switches to my left elbow, making quicker work of the smaller wound. “I think so. In my experience you never realise how happy you are until you aren’t. But still, I think I am.”
“Good,” I say firmly. “I’m glad.”
“What about you?” He turns the questioning back on you. “What’s your story?”
“Oh, you know. The sad story of the girl chasing a dream,” I nodded my head towards the sewing machine stationed at the other end of the table.
“Don’t say that!” His tone jests, but he is serious as he speaks. “I think it would be far sadder if I discovered that your talent was going to waste. I’m really glad to hear that actually,” he half says the last sentence to himself, concentrating on fixing his dressing properly on the more difficult angle of my elbow.
“There you go,” he gleams as he admires his handy work. “Good as new.”
“Thank you so much, Harry. I’m so sorry for all this-“
“Not your fault,” he quickly dismisses.
“Even so, I’m sorry for all the trouble. I’ll pay for an uber home for you or something,” I try to come up with something to offer him that can even begin to repay him for his help.
“Are you going to be okay by yourself?” His brow creases in concern.
“Oh, Alex should be-“ I smack a hand over my mouth, realising I never texted him to let him know I had gotten home okay.
“Oh fuck,” I remove my hand from my mouth. I gingerly fish my phone out of my back pocket, muscles beginning to protest, the impact of that fall settling in.
Four missed calls and a flurry of text messages. My phone had automatically turned onto ‘Do Not Disturb’ mode as scheduled at 12:30. I hadn’t been notified of any of it and he had definitely assumed the worst.
“Is everything okay?”
“I forgot to text him and let him know I made it home okay,” I don’t look up as I speak, opening our text chat.
From Alex: I’m coming home
Received ten minutes ago.
“Your boyfriend?” He questioned, keeping his face impassive. That had my head shooting up.
“Uh-“ I began, but cut myself off as the unmistakeable sound of heeled feet running up the stairs to our apartment ran out loud and clear.
Shit.
Before I could even think what to say next, Alex’s key was in the lock. The door swung open, smacking the wall with the force of it.
Both Harry and Alex’s brows hit their bloody hairline I swear. Or more accurately, Lexie’s.
There my best friend and roommate stood, in full drag, light catching the sequins of the pink mini-dress I had sewn myself. If I weren’t standing there with the guiltiest expression of my life, I would be thinking about how stunning she looked.
Harry looked between the two of you, as Lexie did the same. Both trying to catch their brains up to what they were seeing. I myself was at a loss for words. I probably should have started with, “Lex, I am so sorry,” but Harry broke the silence first.
“Wow, you look amazing,” he breathed, transfixed by the look Lexie had created. Drag was an art form, and she was quite the artist. He was not the first to become enchanted upon first look, and he certainly would not be the last.
Lexie narrowed her eyes at Harry, jaw falling slightly open at the audacity of the acknowledgement in this moment. She had little patience for besotted strangers in moments like this. Her narrowed eyes moved to mine, face filling with rage.
“Lex-“ I begin, but am cut off for what seems to be the millionth time tonight with the simple raise of her hand. The close of my mouth is instant. I was not about to make this any worse.
“Bitch, if you do not have a very good explanation for this,” she breathes deeply, trying to gain her composure, “I am going to fucking kill you.”
                                   ********
As soon as he is out of your apartment and onto the street, his phone is in his hand. Fingers not able to press to type the message fast enough for his liking.
From Harry: We need to talk. I saw her.
As soon as the message was delivered, he was returning the calls he had silenced in y/n’s presence. The moment she had turned her back and left him to wash his hands, he had turned his phone to airplane mode.
“Jesus Christ bruv, I thought you were dead,” Michael joked as soon as he picked up.
The two of them had parted ways for what should’ve been five or ten minutes. Harry hadn’t seen it happen, just heard the clatter of the beer bottle as it skated along the ground and the screeching halt in the argument. He had been waiting patiently for Michael to finish working in the shadowy doorway to the side. He hadn’t seen a thing, and he was sure from his concealed position, whoever had seen Mike hadn’t seen him. So, he obligingly offered to take a walk, ensure she hadn’t gone calling the police.
He had just been bored. Ready to go home and have a drink with Michael so he could have a bitch and a moan about work. It always left him feeling better when he returned on Monday. He was killing time, that was all. He hadn’t expected to stumble over the girl who had changed everything.
Harry didn’t take time to explain his extended absence, moving straight along to what he had called for. Just like Mike, he preferred to skip the pleasantries.
“I need you to subtly divert as much traffic from this block as possible,” he didn’t ask. He never asked. It was always an instruction with him. In this business, asking nicely didn’t exactly lend itself to going far.
“What’s this about?” Harry gritted his teeth. He did not enjoy having his authority questioned. The only reason Michael would get away with it was because of their pre-existing friendship. Even then. Harry was not exactly in a forgiving mood. Made all the worse when Mike added, “This isn’t about that girl from the alley is it?”
Michael had his answer when Harry said only, “Get it done or I’ll have your fookin’ head.”
chat with me about butterfly effect!
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luminescencefics · 3 years ago
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fade in, fade out: deleted scene
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"Why haven’t you kissed me yet?”
Hi all! In honor of Fic Slam 2, here is a Fade chapter six deleted scene. You don’t have to be caught up on the story to understand it as it can completely stand alone, but if you’d like to get a glimpse of Harry and Nora’s world, click here to check it out! Thanks to the lovely as ever @oh-honey-styles for putting this together. I can’t wait to see what everybody else has come up with!
1k word count
my masterlist // read below:
***
Harry was drunk again.
It’s not like he really had any other choice in the matter, considering his mates were buying him round after round and the girl he’s been both simultaneously terrified and begging to talk to has barely spared him a second look in the past two hours.
He really doesn’t blame her, though.
Because things have been unbearably awkward ever since she first stepped on English soil and unknowingly ran into him that night at the pub nearly a month prior. A month filled with longing and confusion and wonder and a ridiculous amount of feelings Harry hasn’t let himself think about in the three years since his eyes last fell on hers.
Harry has so much to make up for—so much grovelling, so much apologizing, so much owning up to do that the weight of it all is practically unimaginable to him.
But like most boys at the ripe age of twenty-two, Harry is a coward. So he sits. And he drinks.
His tactic of avoiding and observing her from a distance seems to be working, because from his vantage point on the other side of the crowded room, his body leaning against the sticky beer-coated cherrywood bar top, he can watch the way her newly dyed dark brown hair flits whenever she turns her head to continue a conversation with her new girlfriends. He can practically hear the melodic giggle falling from her pouty, raspberry stained lips whenever somebody says something worth laughing about. He can practically feel the warmth of her gaze as her bright blue eyes squint in adoration whenever she speaks to somebody she feels undeniably comfortable around.
Because it’s Nora fucking Priestley, and everything she does seems to affect Harry in the most impressive yet terrifying way. It’s as if he’s a livewire and every single time Nora giggles or smiles or leaves a lipstick stain on her pint glass, Harry flinches with the possibility of rupture. His heart does things his drunken brain can’t seem to comprehend, and when her blue eyes fall onto his hazy greens and she stares at him with a look he can’t decipher, Harry feels his stomach bottom out. He doesn’t realize how tightly he’s clutching onto his pint glass until the skin surrounding his knuckles are painted white and practically ripping at the seam, and it’s only when she looks away when Harry feels his lungs expanding for a proper breath, and he nearly collapses under the weight of it.
He needs another fucking drink.
Somehow he’s ended up alone in the ripped, red-leather clad booth, an empty beer and shot glass in front of him. He’s been staring at the same chipped wood for so long that he hasn’t realized that the rest of his mates have upped and left him until the gentle thud of a smaller body falls into the seat near him. Suddenly, the smell of sandalwood and rosebud flood through his nostrils, and he doesn’t need to look up to see that it’s her. The pathetic drumline of his heart thundering underneath his expensive dress shirt practically gives him away.
“Are you ever going to talk to me?” Nora’s quiet voice asks, and Harry’s surprised he can hear it over the loud clamor of the band from the stage in front of them.
He looks up then, sad green eyes looking into blue. It still shocks him how familiar she feels, his body practically rendered motionless when he feels the warmth of her smooth skin, remembers the quirk of her upper lip, refamiliarizes himself with the beauty marks littering her face.
God, he misses her so much, to the point where he can hardly breathe sometimes.
“I don’t know what to say to you, I just—I don’t want to fuck up anymore. ‘S all I seem to do whenever I’m around you. So not saying anything is the—’s just the better alternative.”
“So you won’t talk to me, but you’ll stare at me from across the bar?” Nora asks with a teasing grin.
Harry laughs a bit, his cheeks pinkening when he realizes his tactics were not as subtle as he originally planned.
With a shrug, Harry says, “Can’t help it, you’re too pretty not to look at.”
Now, Nora’s the one blushing. “I think you’ve had one too many of these, mister,” she says, flicking her navy-painted fingernail against his empty pint glass. The action causes her bare arm to brush against his, and Harry shudders at the simplest form of contact.
God, he really is pathetic.
She’s a bit closer now, and without really thinking of the repercussions, Harry grasps at her wrist gently and observes the color coating her fingernails a bit closer.
“Hm, ‘s nice. Brings out your eyes,” he whispers, suddenly realizing how closely they’re sitting to one another. Nora’s kneecap is digging into the meat of Harry’s thigh, and the point of her elbow is resting on the sticky table while her forearm brushes the material of his shirt covering his ribs.
“You aren’t even looking at my eyes,” Nora whispers back, her body quivering when Harry lifts his gaze from her bitten lips to her darkened pupils.
Harry licks his bottom lip, coating the dry skin with his saliva until they look alive again—two glistening pink pillows that Nora remembers thinking about long after she first tasted them nearly three years ago in her tiny Townbridge dorm room in the middle of winter.
“Why haven’t you kissed me yet?” Harry asks, leaning a centimeter forward so that Nora can feel the warmth of his breath against her skin.
“Do you want me to?” she asks timidly, feeling his thumb gently caress her palm, his digit creating a tantalizing path from wrist to palm, back and forth, the sensation embarrassingly dizzying.
“Nora, I think I’ll die if you don’t kiss me ever again.”
Nora feels a breath trapped in her lungs, a hitch of her breath as she flicks her eyes back and forth, zeroing in on the enlargement of his pupils when he realizes that she hasn’t backed away from him yet. The revelation is so honest and so un-Harrylike that Nora isn’t sure why her lips aren’t fastened to his own yet, and when she finds that she hasn’t blinked in nearly sixty seconds, she brings her face just a bit closer to his, a subtle shift that causes the loud noise of the pub to fade into the background.
And just when she’s about to close the small distance between them, the tips of their noses brushing as their lips hover dangerously close to the others, sporadic spurts of hot breaths passing between the two like a secret, Piper calls Nora’s name from the bar, causing the sound of the busy pub to come crashing back into her ear canals, forcing Nora to spring backwards as if Harry’s lips were made of fire.
“Nora! Refills!” Piper yells over drunkenly, seemingly unaware that she interrupted Nora and Harry’s second first kiss in almost three years.
“I, uh—I should go,” Nora says quickly, cheeks permanently stained red as she tries her hardest to regulate her breathing.
“Yeah,” Harry says defeatedly, watching as she scrambles out of the old leather booth and stumbles over to the bar without looking at him over her shoulder.
When she’s finally gone, Harry sinks into the leather seating, slamming his head back against the booth as he struggles to get his erratic heartbeat back to the standard sixty beats per minute. His fingers itch for another drink, and when he maneuvers his legs out from under the table, he nearly flinches at the sudden tightness of his pants.
He looks down, noticing the slightly risen bump covering the front of his dark jeans, and he sighs frustratedly, running a shaking hand through his long, mangled curls.
He’s half-hard and embarrassed beyond disbelief at the fact that Nora’s lips barely grazing against his own roused such a reaction out of him.
Harry Styles truly is pathetic—pathetic, indeed.
***
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acnelli · 3 years ago
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First Time Falling
This is my entry for the @hpqueerfest 2021. Thanks to the mods who hosted this! And a big thank you to my great beta-readers @nagemeikenu and @static-abyss who put up with my phone-writery (writing time is hard to come by these days).
This story was inspired by Prelude and Fugue by shes_gone, and it’s set in a world where Harry didn’t go to Hogwarts, but had been prepared for his destiny.
Pairing: Harry Potter/Ron Weasley Rating: T TW: strong language, mentions of war time, mentions of drug and alcohol consume Prompt: Falling in love for the first time as an adult (late 20’s-early 30’s) Summary: Harry Potter –Head-Auror and Savior of the Wizarding World– spontaneously asked out a cute redhead and it turned to so much more than he could have ever hoped for. 
You can also read this on AO3 and FFN.
*** *** *** *** ***
Not bothering to knock, Ron Weasley marched into Hermione Granger’s office. The heavy mahogany door slammed against the wall, making Hermione jump up from her chair.
“Ron,” she shrieked as a bunch of paper fell off her desk. “What happened?”
Instead of providing his best friend with an explanation for his sudden intrusion, Ron paced back and forth. The panicked look in his eyes made Hermione assume the worst.
With one swift motion, Hermione stepped in front of the redhead, forcing him to stop his frantic pacing. “Ron, please talk to me,” she pleaded, taking his hand into hers. “What’s going on? Is someone hurt? Is your family okay?”
Hermione’s worried expression and the panic in her voice finally brought Ron to his senses. “No, don’t worry, Hermione,” he sighed as he closed her office door. “I’m sorry! But...do you have time for a quick cup of tea in the cafeteria?”
“As a matter of fact, I do. This report is giving me a headache and I need a break.”
Hermione grabbed her purse and gestured for Ron to lead the way.
“I swear, Ron, if you almost gave me a heart attack over something Quidditch related, I’ll hex you into next week and make your new Firebolt disappear forever,” Hermione added as they made their way down to the Ministry cafeteria.
Ron glanced over at the bushy-haired witch, suppressing a grin as he told her his distress was indeed about Quidditch. They grabbed their beverages and headed towards a free table. Gracing him with a dark look, Hermione gestured for Ron to finally tell her what’s going on.
“Harry Potter asked me out on a date!”
This statement caused Hermione’s drink to go down the wrong way, resulting in a violent coughing fit and her spitting out the tea.
“What?” she wheezed out between coughs, as Ron cleaned his face and shirt with his wand.
He waited patiently until Hermione recovered, both from the coughing fit and the shock. “See, even you don’t believe me,” Ron sighed, harshly rubbing his hands over his face, “I don’t blame you, though. I can’t believe it myself, after all.”
Finally being able to speak again, Hermione put her elbows on the small table and leaned forward, determined to not miss a single thing about this story. “Spill! How? When? Where? And don’t you dare to leave out even the smallest detail.”
Ron shook his head, still in disbelief about what had happened to him just twenty minutes ago. Not being able to wrap his head around it, he decided to tell Hermione today’s events from beginning to end.
“Today, Robertson sent me a memo to come to his office to discuss the ridiculous complaints about the Tornados/Harpies game last week,” Ron started and couldn’t help rolling his eyes about the things he had to put up with at work sometimes. “So, I went there, gave him my report about the match and a brief overview. Thank Merlin, he only asked his usual useless questions about referee bribery claims. I was ready to launch into a whole speech but he suddenly dismissed me and told me to write up a statement for the press.
“I was just on my way back to my office when I met Seamus. The fucking wanker had the nerve to claim the next Cannons match for himself. I know he did that just to spite me so, naturally, I gave him an ear full about it as we waited for the lift. We only noticed Harry Potter standing right behind us when we got inside the lift. I probably sounded like an idiot but Seamus and I kept the conversation up because I always get second-hand embarrassment when people stop talking if Potter walks by or joins the lift.”
Hermione patiently listened to his ramblings, restraining herself from telling him to get to the point already.
Ron sipped on his tea and shook his head. “You know what? I read too much into this. Just realised that I’m acting exactly as everyone else does. What’s the big deal? Just a bloke who wants to have a pint after work.”
Hermione stared at Ron, expecting him to go on with his story, but he just kept sipping his tea.
“Ron!”
“What?”
“How did he ask you out?” She accidentally raised her voice but Hermione was finally losing her patience with him.
“I told you, he most likely-”
“Just tell me the damn story, already!” Hermione snapped, blushing a little when she noticed the people on the other tables giving her funny looks.
“Alright,” Ron said, raising an eyebrow at her. “Calm down, barmy woman.”
“You're the one marching into my office like a lunatic. Spill it! Now!”
With a heavy sigh, Ron continued with his story, curling his hands around the tea mug to keep from fidgeting.
“Seamus had already gotten off at another level, so it was just me and Potter in there. I tried to avoid the awkward silence, so I asked him if he followed Quidditch and was going to listen to or even watch the Tornados match tonight. He said that he does follow Quidditch and that he intended to listen to the match at home but if I'd be up to it, we could listen to it at this new pub that just opened in Diagon. He totally caught me by surprise, but I must've agreed because he told me he'll meet me at the fireplaces at 5. Then he left the lift. Then I freaked out and came to your office.”
Ron marked the end of his story by taking another sip of his tea before he defiantly crossed his arms in front of him.
“Jesus, Harry Potter actually asked you out! Oh my God!” Hermione almost squealed, grasping one of Ron's arms.
“Nah! I don't think so anymore. I bet he just wanted to have a pint and was only being polite when he asked me to come along,” Ron said. “Who'd ask someone out like that anyway?”
“Someone looking for a partner?”
“Yeah, but think about it, Hermione. Why would he ask me out? The guy is not only fucking famous, he's also devilishly handsome. He could have anyone he wanted.”
“So?”
Ron looked at Hermione as though she'd just declared the desire to live as a chicken.
“So? So, why would someone ask me out while on a random stroll through the Ministry? Who'd think ‘Oh, that freakishly tall ginger with more freckles than skin looks kinda awkwardly cute. Let's try to get a leg over?'"
“I dated you,” Hermione interjected.
“You don't count.”
“Well, thank you!” Her sarcasm was all but ignored by Ron.
“I just know I'll embarrass myself tonight,” Ron insisted, looking quite unhappy. “Let's go back to work. I still have to write that useless report.”
“Devilishly handsome, hm?”
“Shut up!”
**** **** **** ****
Harry didn't know what had possessed him to ask the cute ginger out for a pint.
Maybe it had been the Prophet article speculating for the umpteenth time about when the Savior of the Wizarding World would finally settle down and make some black-haired, green-eyed babies. Rita Skeeter had many ideas about what worthy witch could conquer the heart of Harry Potter. All things considered, the article had probably not been the worst thing written about him so far.
Sometimes he wondered if he should've taken Sirius’ advice to feed the press and public meaningless details of his life. It wouldn't stop the constant speculations and made-up affairs, but it probably would reduce the paparazzi following him around, the crazy fans sending him love letters and maybe, they would find something more newsworthy than where Harry Potter bought his toilet paper.
But he hated the fact that people demanded this from him. He was 29 now, and while the great hype about him was over, he still seemed to be interesting enough to write about, even over a decade after his defeat of Voldemort.
He knew the majority of the Wizarding World was sincerely grateful for what he'd done. There were so many parents thanking him for the simple fact that they're still alive and able to see their children grow up.
It reminded him that it was all worth it. The sacrifices, the nearly friendless childhood, his secret life away from the public, the growing up with the knowledge that he might not live long enough to celebrate his 17th birthday. All of that had resulted in ending Voldemort once and for all.
When he'd destroyed the Dark Lord and his Horcruxes though, Harry’s hope of finally living a normal life got crushed soon after. In the post-war world, it had been next to impossible to lead a life like everyone else. Because of his childhood and his training by Alastor ‘Mad Eye’ Moody himself, he learned not to trust easily. And since occasions to make friends or interact with strangers had been few and far between, he never really learned what to look for in a friend.
He was well aware that he was complaining about a comfortable life. His parents had left him a respectable amount of gold, and Sirius bought him a flat in London after he graduated from Auror Academy. Maybe he'd gotten this job because of his fame and reputation, but he knew he deserved the position as Head Auror. There was hardly anyone with the same amount of training and experience he brought to the table, and he was under the impression the people working for him did genuinely like him as a boss. Two of them he even considered friends after all these years.
Aside from the two friends at work he also had his family. He had Sirius, Remus, Andromeda, Tonks and his godson, Teddy. He wasn't alone by any means, but he'd never met someone he could possibly fall in love with. Hell, aside from one of Tonks’ old friends from school and her father's attempts to set him up with several of his countless nieces—and later nephews when Harry told his family girls didn't do it for him—he'd never even dated. Toby—a fellow student from elementary school and the only friend his age—dragged him to Muggle pubs and clubs, resulting in the occasional snog or even a shag with a stranger. Needless to say, his first time hadn't exactly been romance novel material and it sure wasn't something he liked to think about. Sometimes, Harry feared that he would never fall in love, that he wasn't capable of developing those feelings for another person.
Those unpleasant thoughts combined with the Rita Skeeter article may have been the result of his sudden impulse to just go for it and ask the redhead out. But it also could have been the brilliant blue eyes, the kind, shy smile and the lean shoulders. Harry was sure, though, that the main reason for it had been the fact that this man hadn't treated him like a Messiah. It had just been an easy conversation, even if it had been only two minutes.
Harry hoped it would remain that way when they watched the game later. In fact, he could just brush it off as a friendly meeting with a fellow Ministry worker if Cute Ginger wasn't interested in anything more.
But when he thought about the redhead’s lopsided grin, Harry felt a foreign flutter in his stomach and he couldn't help but hope for more, even if it was just another visit to the pub.
**** **** **** ****
In the 30 years of Ron Weasley’s existence, he'd never been on time for something not work-related. Today, though, he was almost ten minutes early as he waited by the fireplaces for Harry Potter.
Again, he felt rather pathetic. For a hot second, he considered waiting in a nearby bathroom to pass the time, pretending to get to their meeting place just in time. But then he reminded himself that he wasn’t a petty teenager anymore, and even if Potter found it pathetic, Ron didn’t expect a repeat of tonight, anyway.
He decided to just treat this like a meet-up with Dean and Seamus every other Thursday after work. Just two guys, enjoying a couple of pints together, talking about Quidditch. Nothing special. Nothing to freak out over.
The atrium was busy as ever but he spotted Potter right away when the Head-Auror stepped out of the lift and made his way towards the fireplaces. He still wore his magenta work robes and Ron couldn't help but notice how sexy they looked on him.
“Hi!” Potter greeted Ron, smiling somewhat shyly. “Ready for some beer and Quidditch?”
“Sure! But I forgot to introduce myself earlier, so I figured I'd do that now,” Ron said, giving the dark haired man a smile in return, as he offered his hand for a proper introduction. “I'm Ron. Ron Weasley.”
“I'm Harry.”
**** **** **** ****
“No way! How did he get out of there?”
Harry barked out a laugh at Ron's tale of a night out with Seamus and Dean. His outburst was loud enough for the other guests of the pub to look in their direction. Ron found it amusing how a simple change into Muggle clothes, different glasses, and a slightly lighter hair colour resulted in no one recognizing the Boy-Who-Lived.
“Since it was a Muggle police station, Seamus had to spend the night there. Statute of Secrecy, and all. We picked him up the next morning and filled him in on what he'd done the night before, including showing everyone his pale arse.” Ron grinned deviously at the memory. “I invented some things for good measure. Unfortunately, Dean is too good for this world and told him a few hours later that I was taking the mickey.”
Harry shook his head, chuckling. “That reminds me of Remus searching the whole of London for Sirius, only to find him several hours later in a hidden spot on the roof. He was gazing at the stars and totally stoned. Combined with Firewhiskey, he didn't remember a single thing from that night.”
“Sirius?” Ron looked quite interested at the mention of his Godfather’s name. “Sirius, as in Sirius Black?”
“Yes. He was my Dad’s best friend. And he's my Godfather.”
“I'm just asking because I'm related to the Blacks. My grandfather married Cedrella Black.”
“Yes, I recognize the name. Her face got blasted off the family tree,” Harry said, and at Ron's raised eyebrow quickly added, “Sirius’ mother blasted everyone off that tree who didn't uphold the Black family's motto ‘Toujours pur’. So, Cedrella must have gone against the high and mighty Black Pureblood tradition.”
“Well,” Ron said, taking a swig of his beer, “she married a Weasley. I'm sure that alone was reason enough to disown her. The Weasleys have been notorious blood traitors since forever.”
“Sounds like your grandmother had good taste in men if you ask me.”
Harry winked at Ron, and the redhead felt the burning blush creeping up his neck.
Ron was once again amazed at how little time it had taken him to lose his nervousness. But Harry Potter made it very easy for him. Harry was confident, yet humble and polite. His humor didn't have Ron's sarcastic edge, but the redhead found Harry delightfully witty with a good amount of sass.
Ron didn't know what he expected but it was undeniable how easy it was to talk to Harry. He could only hope the raven-haired man enjoyed this just as much as he did. Harry laughed at his jokes and seemed genuinely interested in Ron's more-than-mundane life.
As much as Ron tried to see this as a meeting with a good friend, he couldn't help the warm feeling in his chest every time Harry smiled at him or his leg accidentally bumped against Ron's. And if the alcohol hadn't gone to his head already, making him imagine things, Harry's eyes kept flitting down to Ron's lips.
When the woman behind the bar announced the final round, they decided to call it a night since it was one of Harry's work Saturdays tomorrow.
As they ventured out of the crowded pub and into the cool night air, Ron was disappointed about the evening coming to an end. Time had flown and he was sure they could've talked for several more hours.
“Would you mind if I walk you home?” Harry asked just as Ron wanted to wish him a good night.
Ron nodded, not being able to suppress his smile as Harry obviously remembered him mentioning that he only lived a few blocks away.
They kept their pace slow and walked a little closer to each other than necessary, their hands bumping against one another. Every touch sent a jolt through Ron's body and he wanted nothing more than to take Harry's hand.
Eventually, they reached their destination. During the entire walk home Ron had gathered all of his Gryffindor courage to ask Harry out, this time for an official date.
“I- um,” Ron started, rubbing one hand against the back of his neck to ease his nerves. “I really enjoyed this evening and I was wondering...Maybe I got this all wrong, but you seem interested, and well, I'm interested too. And if you're not, that's totally fine. But...caniseeyouagain?”
And before Ron's face had the time to go completely crimson, he got his answer as Harry took his hand to pull him close, leaned up and kissed him.
Harry pulled back from Ron's lips, his stunning, green eyes slightly darker than usual and holding a hopeful glint.
Ron didn't give himself the chance to overthink as he put his hand on the back of Harry's neck and kissed him again. A deep groan escaped him when Harry licked at Ron's bottom lip and Harry took the opportunity to slip his tongue inside.
Ron was positive that he'd never experienced something more incredible than kissing Harry Potter. The only things he was capable of paying attention to were Harry and the wild thumping of his heart. And while it was exhilarating and new and positively made him weak in the knees, it also felt a lot like coming home.
Having lost all sense of time, Ron couldn't tell if they'd kissed for a minute or several hours when they broke apart. Harry's hands still gripped his shirt and Ron let his own hands glide from Harry's dark hair down over strong, well-defined shoulders to finally rest at his hips.
Both of them tried to catch their breath and Harry, who finally let go of Ron's shirt to put his arms around him, smiled up at Ron almost shyly.
“Yes, you can see me again,” Harry said, grinning.”What are your plans for tomorrow night?”
“Well,” Ron pretended to think about it for a second, “I thought I'd do this.”
And with that, he leaned in to kiss Harry again.
“I think that's a brilliant idea.”
**** **** **** ****
Just as he turned off the radio and grabbed his coat from the rag beside the door, a loud knock sounded through Harry's now quiet flat.
“Ten minutes early. Eager, aren't we?” Harry said as he opened the door for a tall ginger with a picnic basket in one hand and a broom in the other.
“Says the one waiting right beside the door like a good dog.”
Ron shoved his way inside, putting down the basket and broom before pulling Harry into his arms.
“Happy Birthday,” Ron murmured against the other man's lips. “And I thought I was supposed to give you a present, not the other way around?”
Harry pulled back a little, apparently confused. Ron grinned at him and squeezed Harry's arse. “Thanks for wearing my favourite pants today.”
Chuckling, Harry pointed at the broom Ron had brought with him. “No way I'll fly on a broom in these. Good thing I also packed my joggers.”
Ron hadn't told him where they were going for Harry's Birthday. He'd just instructed Harry to be ready at 9 in the morning, so they'd be back in time for dinner at Grimmauld Place with Harry's family.
Only two months had passed since their first kiss, but Harry already felt as though he'd known Ron for much longer. Every kiss, every touch, all the teasing and banter, and late night talks felt so completely natural, yet blissfully exciting.
“Come on, grab your broom. We're on a tight schedule.”
Ron winked at him and before Harry knew it, they were standing in the middle of a giant Quidditch pitch.
There wasn't a single soul besides them, but Harry immediately recognized the giant Hogwarts House banners from his family's keepsakes of their school years. Aside from that fateful day when he'd fought Voldemort on those grounds, he'd never visited the school. Not before, not after.
Harry tried to swallow down the lump in his throat. The surprise must be the result of one of their late night talks, when Harry confessed that his deepest desire while growing up had been to go to Hogwarts.
“Are we allowed to be here or do I need to arrest you for breaking into school grounds?”
Arms wrapped around him from behind and Harry could feel Ron smiling against the back of his head. “I wouldn't be opposed to playing the big bad Auror and the naughty Suspect later, but this is actually 100% legal. Having contacts with important Quidditch officials has its perks sometimes. And my annual chess game against McGonagall helped too, I suppose.”
“Okay then,” Harry said, lifting one of Ron's hands to his mouth to brush his lips against his knuckles. “Fill me in on that plan of yours.”
Ron let go of him and reached for their brooms, tossing one of them at Harry. “I thought we'd fly over the grounds first, so I can show you everything from above. The castle looks fucking amazing from up there and the Great Lake is a sight to die for when the water reflects the sun.”
Ron mounted his broom and flew in slow circles around Harry as he continued to talk. “I hope you don't mind that I invited your family for dinner. But I thought we could all show you the castle, introduce you to our favourite spots and secret places. Andromeda can show us the Slytherin common room. I've never been there myself. I'll show you the kitchen first. That's where I'll cook dinner later while the others show you around.”
Jumping down from his broom, Ron looked at Harry with a mixture of excitement and reluctance as he rubbed the back of his neck. It was a telltale sign of the redhead being nervous, Harry had learned in the last weeks.
“So, I thought this to be fitting for a 30th Birthday. I wasn't sure what to get you that you don't already have, and I reckoned this might be fun.”
Harry didn't know what to say and his silence only made Ron doubt his plan more. It always baffled Harry how Ron didn't realize how wonderful he was. He wished Ron could see himself through Harry's eyes.
Right at that moment, as Harry looked into Ron's blue eyes, it hit him. In fact, he knew he'd been harbouring these feelings inside him for weeks now, but only now he could see it with shining clarity.
He was falling in love.
The feeling was new, something he'd never experienced, but still he recognized it for what it was.
 Love.
***
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charlieweas · 3 years ago
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          " my brother charlie was always more of an outdoor type,                           so he went for care of magical creatures. ”
(  ᮄÉȘs ᎍᎀʟᎇ ,  ʜᎇ / ʜÉȘᎍ ,  ᎛ʜÉȘʀ᎛ʏ ,  ᎅᎀᎄʀᎇ áŽáŽÉŽáŽ›ÉąáŽáŽáŽ‡Ê€ÊÂ Â )   during the trial of voldemort’s last major conspirators, 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐋𝐄𝐒 '𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐋𝐈𝐄' 𝐖𝐄𝐀𝐒𝐋𝐄𝐘 was spotted. they work for the đ™đ™Šđ™ˆđ˜Œđ™‰đ™„đ˜Œđ™‰ đ˜żđ™đ˜Œđ™‚đ™Šđ™‰ đ™Žđ˜Œđ™‰đ˜Ÿđ™đ™đ˜Œđ™đ™” đ˜Œđ™Ž đ˜Œđ™‰ đ™€đ˜żđ™đ˜Ÿđ˜Œđ™đ™„đ™Šđ™‰ / đ™Šđ™đ™đ™đ™€đ˜Œđ˜Ÿđ™ƒ đ˜żđ™„đ™đ™€đ˜Ÿđ™đ™Šđ™. rumor has it they are 𝐃𝐎𝐔𝐆𝐇𝐓𝐘 + 𝐑𝐄𝐒𝐈𝐋𝐈𝐄𝐍𝐓, but i’ve heard they’re 𝐁𝐔𝐋𝐋𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐃𝐄𝐃 + 𝐄𝐍𝐈𝐆𝐌𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐂. during the battle of hogwarts they 𝙁𝙊𝙐𝙂𝙃𝙏 𝙁𝙊𝙍 𝙏𝙃𝙀 𝙊𝙍𝘿𝙀𝙍. when i think of them, i’m reminded of freckles mingling with sunspots from prolonged outdoor escapades, decades of detailed research and annotations scribbled into the pages of an old notebook, the flickering light cast from flames reflective against a cherished dragon scale.    (  ᎀʟᎇx  )
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———— 🔾 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐓𝐒
full name.    charles septimus weasley
nicknames.    charlie
birthdate.    december 12th  ( sagittarius )
gender.    cis male  ( he / him )
orientation.    heterosexual  ( demiromantic )
relationship.    single
parents.    arthur & molly weasley
siblings.    bill, percy, fred, george, ron, & ginny weasley
occupation.    education / outreach director at the romanian dragon sanctuary
house.    gryffindor
affiliation.    the order
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———— 🔾 𝐑𝐄𝐂𝐀𝐏
the second of seven children born to arthur and molly weasley, charlie was merely a child during the height of the first wizarding war and didn’t quite understand the politics of it all, nor how devastatingly important his involvement would be in the future.
along with his five brothers and younger sister, charlie grew up in the burrow on the outskirts of ottery st catchpole in devon, england. like the other weasley children, he was homeschooled in reading, writing, and simple maths by his mother. they weren’t a wealthy family, by any means, in comparison to other wizard families. in fact, many other pureblood families disdained the weasleys for their lack of wealth as well as their “blood traitor” pro-muggles beliefs. they tried their best to make up for it with their love and, as all the weasley siblings did, charlie had a fairly happy childhood.
during his time at hogwarts, he excelled at both his studies and quidditch. while he demonstrated great skill and promise as a seeker during his second year, charlie favored his studies more than the sport, electing to take care of magical creatures class and muggle studies. however, he wasn’t the golden child everyone suspected, as he repeatedly snuck off into the forbidden forest, convinced that he could catch a dragon in there. the temptation of adventure was always far too enticing for charlie to pass up, which landed him in trouble more often than not.
sometime during his fifth year, he eventually became captain of the gryffindor quidditch team and victoriously lead the team to win several quidditch cups over the following two years. however, after graduating from hogwarts, instead of pursuing a professional career in quidditch, charlie ditched the the uniform to go study dragons in romania - his true passion.
visits home became less frequent, the more successful he was and the deeper he got into his studies, but letters from the second eldest weasley never ceased to arrive by owl weekly ( if not daily ). unfortunately, this caused the close connections he had with his immediate family to tarnish slightly, as he wasn’t there to watch his siblings flourish on their own right. despite his physical absence, however, charlie did his best to stay in the loop and help out where he could, ( ie. when ron wrote a letter asking for his help in getting rid of a dragon that hagrid had acquired off a man in a pub ), as well as attending family vacations and gatherings.
as he moved up in his studies, charlie was awarded specific tasks, such as his assistance in bringing the dragons to hogwarts for the first task in the triwizard tournament, and remained to act as a caregiver in case the dragons got out of hand.  
when dumbledore reconsituted the order to oppose voldemort, he joined alongside his family. while bill returned to england to better serve the order, charlie remained in romania and was assigned to recruit foreign wizards to the cause. during the battle at hogwarts, he was late receiving his letter from neville as he was out of the country and was unable to immediately join the rest of them. however, he did arrive with slughorn, leading hundreds of reinforcements into battle, and successfully changing the tide of the battle in favor of the defenders of hogwarts.
he remembered being scared. not of death, necessarily, to his own accord, but to that of his family and friends. he feared the potential possibility of arriving too late; of everyone being slaughtered in his absence. he also remembered the utter shamble of emotions that hit him all at once when he witnessed harry defeating and killing voldemort once and for all. it was astonishing, to say the least, and the biggest relief he’d felt in quite some time.
after the war, charlie returned to romania and dove right back into his work at the dragon sanctuary. of course, when called upon, he helped in any way he could in locating the stragglers of voldemort’s followers who had scattered shortly after his defeat. fast forward a few years later, and charlie has returned to england to attend the trials of the more prominent followers that have finally been located. 
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———— 🔾 𝐅𝐀𝐂𝐓𝐒
his passions, studies, and eventually work have all kept him much too busy to ever consider seeking out some type of intimate relationship. it’s not that he has commitment issues, it’s just that between juggling personal goals, a demanding workload, and his family ( and the exciting things going on in their respective lives ), charlie boy just simply doesn’t have time for courting.
if it wasn’t obvious already, he has an affinity for magical creatures, more specifically dragons. ever since he was a young boy, he’d been fixated on studying the fire-breathing winged giants, even secretly tried to turn the weasley’s family pets into dragons. but since it was before his time at hogwarts ( and therefore before he even knew any actual spells ), charlie settled with sticking paper wings on scabbers with spellotape, and making errol fly around with a dragon mask, all while following them around and jotting down his “observations of dragon behavior” in his notebook.
if he’d stuck to it after graduating from hogwarts, charlie most definitely would have been able to play for england’s national quidditch team ( at least, according to his friends ). he’d been the captain of the gryffindor team as well as their seeker, and considered to be a highly talented and accomplished broomstick flyer. but, you know. dragons.
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theasstour · 4 years ago
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𝐅𝐈𝐂 𝐏𝐀𝐆𝐄 | 𝐖𝐎𝐑𝐃 𝐂𝐎𝐔𝐍𝐓: 𝟏𝟑.đŸ’đ€ 𝐍𝐁:Â đšđ„đœđšđĄđšđ„, đžđ±đ©đ„đąđœđąđ­ đ„đšđ§đ đźđšđ đž
A/N: Thank you to the lovelies who nominated Strange Tides, Baby Blue, and moi for the 1D Craft Awards 🌊🐚 If you have the time and feel like spreading some love, go vote for your fave fics and authors here ✹ ENJOYYY CHAPTER 5! x
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Tuesday, 7 July
“I’d say you’re doing quite alright for someone who has just gotten into knitting,” Bessie said, looking at Y/N’s creation over the rim of her glasses. “What technique did your mother teach you again, sweets? ‘Cause you’re a natural.”
“Oh, I dunno,” Y/N answered honestly, taking her blue square back. “Are there different types of knitting styles?”
Bessie’s laugh was warm and joyous, looking out at Camila, Florence, and Barb, who smiled at Y/N. Though Y/N had been scared of being judged by these women for not knowing how to properly knit at first, there was nothing but kindness and appreciation in their eyes. It seemed they really were just happy to see the beginning of Y/N’s knitting journey. They had all been beyond helpful, taking their time and being patient with her as she learned the ins and outs of knitting. She was still not sure what she was making, but she was knitting a bunch of squares to start off, and she would see where to go from there.
“So,” Florence said, turning her attention back on the knitting in front of her. “What do you think of St Ives thus far, Y/N? Is it living up to your expectations?”
“You’ve been here a month now,” Bessie said, shaking her head as if she couldn’t quite believe it. And Y/N couldn’t believe it herself. Time had flown by so incredibly fast it did not seem quite real. It seemed like only yesterday she had checked in here and met Bessie, or when she ran into Harry and started their little thing. It just did not seem real that time had gone by this fast. In a month’s time, summer would almost be over and she would have to start thinking about checking out and finding out what to do next. Going back home to Winchester was out of the question, but she didn’t really have anywhere else to go.
Y/N took a deep breath, telling herself not to think about that now. Debating what to do after she checked out of The Roaming Crab Inn could be done at another time, not while she was knitting with four lovely ladies. For someone who had lived her whole life with a plan laid out for her near and far future, Y/N was awfully relaxed about the prospect of the chapter of her life that would start once she left St Ives in August.
“I love it here,” she answered truthfully, finding some red yarn so she could start knitting a red square. “I’ve met so many people while staying here, it’s been amazing.”
“It’s been fun to meet Harry’s family as well,” Barb said. “If your name comes up in conversation when we’re at the chess club, Jessa won’t shut up. She’s so proud Harry’s dating such a lovely lady.”
Y/N felt her cheeks heat up, both because she took pride in that compliment but also because she knew Jessa wouldn’t think of her like that when she and Harry “broke up” later.
“Speaking of people you’ve met, my son tells me you went to the pub with him, Harry, and their little group.” Florence looked at Y/N, smiling. “Did he invite you to his birthday this Saturday?”
“Yeah, Harry told me we were invited,” Y/N said.
“Dax and Harry have been close ever since Harry came to St Ives. He even slept at the lighthouse for close to a month after Harry’s father got lost at sea.”
Y/N stopped knitting. When she looked over at Florence again, the older woman was already knitting so she didn’t notice Y/N’s sudden interest. She looked over at Bessie who only gave Y/N a nod as to confirm what Florence had just said, and in that second Y/N was very happy Bessie knew her and Harry’s relationship was only pretend.
“The day they found the empty boat was absolutely horrible. All of St Ives in mourning. Remember it like it was yesterday,” Camila went on, sighing dramatically. “Devastating time.”
“Let’s not talk about that,” Bessie chimed in. “It is such a sad time to reminisce about.”
“Yes, no reason we should think about such things,” Barb went on. “I’m sure it’s a touchy subject for Y/N as well, seeing as Harry is so close to her.”
Y/N focused entirely on her knitting, not really wanting to say anything in regards to Harry’s dad. She knew he died, but she hadn’t really questioned how that happened. For some reason, Y/N had assumed he had been sick, but knowing something happened to Harry’s dad while he was at sea
 she didn’t know how to feel. Was it worse to have a loved one be sick and know the end was inevitable and close, or to have them ripped suddenly and unexpectedly out of your life?
“I’m sorry for bringing the mood down, girls,” Florence said, letting a bright laugh escape her lips. “Maybe we need some tea to brighten up our mood some?”
“I think that’s a splendid idea,” Bessie said, getting up from her seat. “Y/N, dear, would you give me a helping hand?”
“Of course.”
Y/N got up and followed Bessie inside to the kitchen, the three others chattering away as the two started making a new batch black tea. Bessie busied herself with finding some mugs, her sugar, and milk, as Y/N just stood beside the kettle and waited for it to finish boiling. With her arms crossed, her mind wandered off to all those times Harry mentioned his dad and his death, not once had he mentioned he was sick, so Y/N didn’t know where she had gotten that idea from. She knew it was not something she should be speculating or thinking about, but right then, she could not help herself.
Instead of thinking about something so tragic, she forced herself to think about Dax’s birthday party the coming weekend. Harry had only mentioned it in passing yesterday, but Y/N was already looking forward to it. There wasn’t much else she did now anyway besides knit, read for the UCAT, and lie about being in a relationship. Throwing some partying into that mix seemed like a bit of fun.
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Saturday, 11 July
“I’m about to do it,” Y/N said, eyes on her laptop screen in front of her. Her white summer dress blew a little in the wind from the open window beside her, but the breeze was welcomed, as it always was in Cornwall.
Harry looked up from where he was going through some bills on his couch, wearing his red knitted jumper along with a pair of short dungaree shorts. Y/N was sat on the other side of his tiny house in the windowsill beside his bed. It was big enough to fit her, her books, and laptop, it was kind of her spot now.
“I’m really about to do it,” Y/N repeated, more for her own sake than for Harry’s - who was a little confused and sat with his mouth open, waiting for her to elaborate – because she simply could not believe she was doing this.
“What?” Harry asked after a while, and when Y/N met his eyes, he blinked a few times as if readying himself for whatever she was about to say.
“Apply for the UCAT exam.”
Last week, Y/N had taken Harry up on his offer to study for her UCAT exam at his place. She came over Friday, and upon seeing her walking up to his house around 8:30, Harry walked toward her on the gravel path. She didn’t know why, but she liked that he did that instead of just standing stoic and just watching her. It made her almost feel urgently desired at his house when he did that.
“Hi,” Y/N greeted as they fell into step beside one another. “Report time?”
“Yeah, just walking around and checking everything.”
She smiled. “And so you walked over here to check on me?”
“Who wouldn’t?”
Y/N wanted to laugh, but Harry was looking at the gravel in front of him, lips sucked into his mouth as if telling himself to shut up. He walked her all the way into his house, telling her to make herself feel at home. She sat down by the round table and placed her books out before her, sighing a little to herself as she opened the first one to the page she’d left off on last time. Before going about his day of lightkeeper chores, he made her a cup of tea and told her to help herself to anything in the fridge. He left in a hurry to report, and Y/N didn’t see much of him till two hours later, when he came inside to look through some paperwork.
The rest of the week, she’d popped by almost every single day and then stayed for hours on end. Though she’d mostly been studying, she had also stayed a little longer just to hang out with Harry. She felt safe on Clodgy Point, with Harry, who, once she got him talking about something he found interesting, would talk someone’s ear off. It was so nice to hang out with someone her own age. Someone who would curse and who didn’t need to gossip all the time. There was something so relaxing about Harry’s presence and his little bungalow that attracted Y/N. She simply could not study in her own room anymore, and Harry didn’t seem to mind. He’d meet her on the gravel path and walk her to his house before he went off to report, every single day without fail. She always looked forward to seeing him there, a sight that made the moors around her seem less turbulent and the world a little more colourful.
Though she sat by the door the first two days, she ended up in the windowsill after a while. When Harry caught her there, he asked if her bum wouldn’t get numb from sitting there all day, to which Y/N jokingly said not to worry, she could just bring a cushion next time, though she always forgot. She didn’t mind though; she liked that windowsill so much that her sore arse didn’t bother her. It also seemed Harry liked that his windowsill was being used, because at one point, he brought his Super 8 camera out, taping her doing her work in the windowsill.
On Monday, something happened that took Y/N’s breath away. Harry walked into the house, zipping his mouth shut when their eyes met as if to tell her he didn’t intend on interrupting her. He made himself something to eat for lunch and sat by the round kitchen table, minding his own business and looking out of the window beside him every now and again for some sort of entertainment. Once he was done eating, he washed his plate up and then, instead of walking back out to work, he walked over to his piano. Y/N immediately sat up a bit straighter, resting her hands on her bent knee as she watched Harry open the piano chair, pull a notebook out, and then sit down once he closed it.
Harry’s hands hovered over the keys before he slowly started pressing down on them, producing the softest melody Y/N thought she might have ever heard. He moved along with the piece, feeling the rhythmic waves take over his body and guide him through the history that melody held. It was clear Harry had some sort of attachment to that piece. Y/N didn’t know how carefully musicians played, how much attention and care they gave to each of the pieces they performed, but there was something graceful and almost intimate about watching Harry perform that piece. Y/N simply could not put her finger on it, but she couldn’t take her eyes off him.
Once he was done playing that specific melody, about to start the next one, Y/N opened her mouth, “What’s that piece called?”
Harry looked at her over his shoulder, raising his eyebrows some as if he hadn’t heard her right.
“Is it well-known?”
“No, uhm
” He furrowed his brows some, looking at the dresser stood beside the piano where a few photos were placed. “I wrote it myself?”
“You did?”
“Yeah, it’s a few years old.”
Y/N couldn’t help her smile. “Does the piece have a title?”
Harry nodded slowly. “Saving Grace,” he explained. “It’s got a dual meaning.”
“Which is?”
“Well, I was 20 when Grace was born. Until then I hadn’t really been around babies, so it took some getting used to when Grace was around most of the time. It had only been my dad and me for a long time, then Jessa came into our lives, which ultimately brought Gracie.” Harry looked out the window Y/N sat in. “It had been a very
 content life till then. Nothing spectacular, Dad and I really did love each other and were best friends since before Mum left us when I was 6. But
” He trailed off. “But then came Jessa and Grace, and they truly changed all that. They made us so happy.”
A warmness that was not due to the hot temperature outside, made its way like a wave down Y/N’s body.
“Grace became my little person, you know? Though I worked at St Ives Bakery and had friends, I still didn’t know what I wanted to really do with my life. I was about to apply to study music at uni, but
 I dunno, I just didn’t. Grace became my purpose for a little while. I earned money so I could take her places and buy her ice cream, or I taught her how to walk, talk, and we did everything together.” Harry turned back to the piano, playing the first few notes slowly. “This melody came to me when I watched her walk without trouble around the moors outside, she was looking at flowers and she was so happy. The melody tries to capture that moment and how perfect that day was.” He stopped, glancing at the sheet in front of him. “She was two years old.”
“So, essentially, you try to capture feelings and moments in your music?”
“Yeah.”
“Do you have any other pieces?”
Harry chuckled, looking over his shoulder at her. “You know, the reason I started playing was to help you concentrate. Piano music is great for that.”
“Sod my work, I want to know more about your music.”
“Oi!” Harry exclaimed, turning his body in her direction now. “I’ve never heard you say that word before! Never heard you speak like that!”
Y/N laughed, but persuaded Harry to play a few of his other pieces before he went back to work.
That Saturday when Y/N brought up the exam, Harry hadn’t played any piano. He sometimes would, both to calm himself down, but also to help Y/N concentrate. She would sometimes take breaks just to listen to him, but his playing really did help her focus. Harry was doing some of his work in the house that Saturday, probably to keep her company, but she was very happy he was there. She needed someone to talk this through with.
There was an instant pull to the edges of Harry’s lips, something that he didn’t have to think about, it was instinctive and genuine. A slight breath left his mouth, almost like something of a chuckle, a relief of sorts that made her all hot. He smiled and got up from the couch, a reason for his movements as if he moved a little easier now that he’d just heard that.
“Are you really?” he asked, taking his tea mug and nodding at Y/N’s beside her. She picked it up and handed it to him.
“I mean, I’ve been thinking about it for weeks, and I feel like it’s stupid to study for an exam if I’m never going to take it.”
“That makes sense, yeah.”
“So, I’m just gonna do it now.”
Harry put their mugs down, filling up the kettle before making another round. Y/N liked that he just assumed she wanted another cuppa. She liked the fact he made her this hot beverage that took a long time for someone to drink up. That he made her several a day. She really liked that.
“I’m thinking, you’ve been reading for weeks and you clearly know the material, you might as well,” Harry said.
“There’s just
 I dunno
”
“What?”
“No.”
Harry was quiet, so when Y/N looked at him, he was already looking at her, waiting for her to continue. Both knew she wouldn’t hold back once she’d already started saying something.
“I’m scared I won’t show up.”
Harry frowned. “Why? That something is gonna come up?”
“No, that I’ll just oversleep on purpose or find any possible solution so I won’t have to go. Maybe my brain will refuse to revise the entire week before it, I tended to do that in school. When I have an opportunity to, I make things hard for myself.”
Harry plopped two sugars into her cuppa. “I won’t let that happen.”
She raised her eyebrows at him. “How, you’re gonna carry me out of my room and to your van, then drive me to the exam?”
“If that’s what it takes.”
She laughed, looking back at the laptop in front of her as Harry walked over, putting the tea down beside her.
“Thanks,” she said.
“I think you should just do it.”
“I know I should, but
 once I sign up, it’s all happening. It’s not just something I’m thinking about doing, it’s actually happening and there’s a date I gotta work toward.” She sighed. “It’s not just a dream anymore.”
“It stopped being ‘just a dream’ the second you bought those books,” Harry said, sipping his tea as Y/N looked up at him where he stood beside her. “When you started reading, you knew what you were doing and yet you did it anyway.”
She studied him for a second, meeting his eyes the second before she turned back to the laptop. “Guess you’re right.”
“I’m right.”
She flung her arm out, hitting him just across his knee. “Cocky.”
“No,” Harry giggled. “I’m correct. You should try being it sometime.”
“Tone it down!”
Harry laughed, walking back over to his paperwork again. He sat working for a bit longer, finishing his tea before he put everything back in the folder and walked back out of the house and to the lighthouse. When the front door slammed shut, it was like Y/N was slapped out of a sort of trance. She had just been looking at the UCAT website, mouse hovering over the ‘Register and Book’ button, mind somewhere else completely. She remembered what Harry said, how registering and taking this exam wouldn’t make this dream of hers reality all of a sudden, she had done that herself when she started deliberately revising for the UCAT.
She clicked the button and made herself a new user on the website. Reading through everything carefully, Y/N felt her heart picking up speed. It was dawning on her that she was really doing this, despite everything, she was finally registering to take the test. The next few minutes as she took all of this in, she completely forgot where she was. All she knew was the information being fed to her. The wind, the sun, the fly flying around her head, nor whatever Harry was doing was any of her concern. She focused entirely on registering and booking a date. A fee of ÂŁ75 had to be paid, and though Y/N would never have thought about paying that kind of money before, she hesitated now.
She didn’t have a job, her parents weren’t providing for her anymore because
 well, she wasn’t talking to them, so she only had the money on her one card left. Though she was sure she could afford the test fee, there would come a time when she couldn’t. Money had never been a problem until now. This hadn’t been something she thought about before, it hadn’t been a problem then because her parents were filthy rich, but she recognised this now. However, this test had been on her mind for years and it was something she really wanted to do, so spending money on it wasn’t something she needed to feel guilty about. Y/N paid the fee and sat there staring at her screen as a ‘Thanks for your booking’ popped up on her screen. Her test was September 10th. That was in two months. In two months she would be taking the UCAT.
She got up from the windowsill, shaking her clammy hands to dry them some, a shaky breath leaving her parted lips as her heart galloped inside her chest. It didn’t feel real. None of it felt real. She was doing the UCAT exam. This was her first big step into dentistry. She was actually doing what she had been dreaming of doing for years now.
She had no idea what made her do it but she walked out of the house, instinctively walking towards the lighthouse. Harry was already halfway to the cottage from the lighthouse, halting a little at Y/N’s abrupt exit. She stopped when she saw him.
“I did it.”
Those three words took a few seconds for Harry to comprehend, but when he did, he gave her the biggest grin she’d ever seen on his face. His eyes completely disappeared behind his cheekbones, crinkles appearing beside them, and his crooked smile was accompanied with his brilliant dimples that breathed light and meaning into every situation they were present in. The sight of it made her own appear and she put a hand over her chest, feeling her heart still going hard against her ribcage. Harry must have not thought a lot of it, because he nearly opened his arms, but they quickly fell to his side. Next, he went to give her a high five, but that almost seemed inappropriate because it was such a huge moment to Y/N.
But Y/N couldn’t stop thinking about the way Harry had opened his arms for her just now. Couldn’t stop thinking about how he wanted her close like that to congratulate her on what she’d just done. And, the part of her that hadn’t really experienced someone’s noticeable pride in her like this before, wouldn’t mind at all. That’s why she ran towards him, and the two seconds Harry had to prepare, Y/N both saw the visible shock at her sprinting for him, but also a sort of jubilation like it was an honour. Y/N threw her arms around him and Harry quickly wrapped her in his, a breath of relief skimming her neck and making goosebumps run through her entire body. She laughed as Harry picked her off the ground, groaning in triumph at the news of her finally having signed up for the UCAT.
She leaned her head against his, smelling that same perfume on him that she remembered smelling when she wore his knitted jumper a few weeks ago. Her theory had also been right: Harry was an amazing hugger. His grip was tight and she was sure he closed his eyes, really immersing himself completely in the person he was embracing. Fingers spread out across her back, the tips of one just touching her shoulder blade and the other on her waist, squeezing her slightly for a few seconds before letting her down again.
“That’s amazing, Y/N,” Harry said, and Y/N tightened her grip.
When they finally let go of one another, Harry ran inside and came back some seconds later holding his camera, said he needed to document this. Y/N did a few poses that made Harry laugh, then proceeding to run out into the field beyond the lighthouse. She felt absolutely ecstatic as she ran around, grinning and jumping, her arms held up high and her heart soaring. After all this time, she was finally pursuing this. If she was able to do something that terrified and excited her like this, then what else could she do? Part of her felt like she could do anything now.
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Porthgwidden Beach was like Harry described it: small. Once Harry and Y/N arrived at the tiny car park above the beach, Y/N stopped for a moment to take in the beach that wasn’t even a fraction of what the other two major beaches of St Ives were. Some TiĂ«sto song was playing somewhere and the beach was crowded, all guests of Dax’s birthday party. The Porthgwidden Beach CafĂ© seemed to have been booked for the occasion as well, people around their age all sitting grouped around the table with their bottles and cups. No one seemed to be going crazy on their alcohol, which reassured Y/N some because it had been a while since she had been drunk, a glass or two of anything would make her very lightheaded and giggly. She had brought with her a bottle of wine in her tote bag, Harry seemed to be relying on his mates having brought drinks. If not, Y/N wouldn’t mind sharing the rest of hers with him.
Y/N had left Harry’s place not long after she signed up for the UCAT so she could get ready for Dax’s birthday party in her own room. She wore a dark green column midi skirt along with a white tee shirt and some short heels that she regretted wearing the second her and Harry stepped out into the sand. He looked over his shoulder at her once he noticed her struggling a bit, offering his hand for her to hold so she could take her heels off. While she did that, she took the liberty to study him again. His outfit was simple, yet effortlessly hot. High waisted mid wash denim jeans, a baggy black tee shirt tucked into them, along with some white socks and black Converse. Y/N had a theory Harry would end up taking his own shoes off by the end of the night too.
The two had met on Island Street where they knew none of the other partygoers would venture. That way, people would’ve seen them walk together all the way to the party, assuming they must’ve spent time at Harry’s place before coming here. They had discussed this plan over a last cuppa tea before Y/N left earlier that day, Harry had seemed very happy with himself for coming up with that one. And as they stood there, Y/N holding his hand while taking her shoes off, they heard some loud whistles followed by a “There they are!”
Looking over, they saw the birthday boy making his way over, arms spread wide and the biggest grin on his face. “My boyo!”
“Dax, not now-“
But the man didn’t listen. He hugged Harry to him, causing Harry to take a few steps, resulting in Y/N losing her balance. With a squeal, Y/N almost fell face first into the sand again, but Harry was fast to bring one hand under her armpit and the other to her hip. He dragged her toward him, her torso flat against his. She saw Harry’s eyes on her face in her peripheral vision, felt his breath on her cheek.
“Oi!” Dax laughed. “Sorry ‘bout that, Y/N. Got a bit carried away seeing this hunk.” Dax put a hand on Harry’s shoulder, causing Harry to jump right out of his trance and let go of Y/N, as if couples didn’t normally embrace each other like this without hesitation.
“Happy birthday, Dax,” Y/N smiled before picking up her shoe, shoving the pair into her tote bag along with her cardigan and Harry’s red knitted jumper.
“Happy birthday, mate,” Harry said.
“You know, I expected you to be the first one here.” Dax crossed his arms over his chest as he looked at Harry.
Harry furrowed his brows at Dax. “What do you mean?”
“Well, isn’t your best friend’s birthday important to you?”
Harry was quiet for a second. “Oh, my word, Dax.”
“I’m just a joke to you.”
“You sure are.”
“Look who it is!” Ellie called, grinning as her and the rest of Harry’s little gang made their way over. “You made it!”
“We were starting to think you two wouldn’t come,” Amir said, his hair in the most effortlessly pretty bun at the top of his head. “Too busy?” Amir wiggled his eyebrows.
“You’re too caught up in people’s sex lives for it to be normal, mate,” Harry said, taking the cup Fatima offered him. “Cheers.”
Something about Harry referring to him and Y/N’s sex life made Y/N’s cheeks feel awfully hot. Even though their joined sex life was non-existent, it still got to her. Maybe it was the way Harry always dodged those questions so the two wouldn’t have to answer any awkward queries they had absolutely no idea about. She didn’t know, but she rummaged through her bag so people wouldn’t see how flustered she suddenly got.
“Just trying to make conversation,” Amir said.
“Well, don’t,” Jo chimed in, their smile mocking and Amir only huffed in response.
“By the way!” Dax exclaimed, grinning from ear to ear. “We’re going Terraland next week, you coming this year, Y/N?”
Y/N raised her eyebrows in question. “What’s Terraland?”
“Theme park in Helston, we go every year towards the end of the summer vacation,” Jo explained. “Harry here-“ They gestured at the man standing beside Y/N. “-Doesn’t like Terraland.”
“I do,” Harry protested. “I like laying by the pool and not doing shit. I don’t particularly like it when you force me on rollercoasters.”
Y/N smiled. “I’ll come if Harry decides to.”
“Brill! All of us are coming, maybe a few others,” Amir said.
“So, it’s like an adventure park with rollercoasters and such?” Y/N asked
“That and pools, very much the kind of thing you visit when you’re on vacation in, like, Spain,” Harry explained. “But it’s in Cornwall.”
“Good for a group of grown up kids, ey?” Dax grinned, clapping his hands together.
“Come, Y/N, babe.” Ellie linked her arm with Y/N’s, taking Y/N off guard, but she didn’t stop Ellie. She looked at their arms and smiled a little. “Let’s get you a cup so we can get this party started.”
“Love your skirt, by the way,” Fatima smiled as they reached a table with tons of cups and napkins.
“Ahh, thank you. Haven’t worn it in a while, so I felt it was fitting to do so today.” Y/N glanced down at her skirt, running her hand over it before reaching for a cup.
“Ellie and I were saying the other day that you’ve got such a sophisticated sense of style, you need to take us shopping.”
“Could use a few pointers,” Ellie agreed, watching Y/N as she poured herself a glass of wine.
“Really?” Y/N screwed the cork shut before putting the bottle away, smiling at the two girls. “I mean, it’s not that good-“
“-Out of respect for what Harry said, I will stop you before you discredit yourself,” Ellie smiled back.
Y/N laughed. “What about respect for me? Respect me wanting to discredit myself for having a mediocre clothing style.”
Both Fatima and Ellie joined in on the laughing and the three girls walked away from the table so they could hang out by themselves. Though St Ives had around 11,000 inhabitants, Y/N was sure a lot of the guests weren’t locals. Maybe friends from University or friends-of-friends, everything to get a good party going. Judging by what Fatima and Ellie told Y/N, this was an annual thing. Dax Rose held a massive birthday party and absolutely everyone was invited. Bring your own alcohol, bring a friend, and bring a smile, and you were welcomed with open arms. People were sitting in the sand or by the cafĂ©, others were just standing around, some were dancing, and a group was also taking a swim and joking around in the water. Y/N genuinely liked the atmosphere; it was just really freeing and nice. People wore whatever they wanted, laughter could be heard everywhere, and it just seemed like everyone wanted to have a good time.
Though anyone could come join the party – something that made her look around her a few too many times -, there were still enough people there to notice something suspicious going on.
Fatima, Ellie, and Y/N stood just talking for a while. It was really nice to talk to some girls her own age again, she couldn’t remember the last time she had done that. She had some good friends at school but once they had gone off to University or moved away from Winchester, she fell out of touch with most of them. Y/N knew it wasn’t personal, she quite liked the fact her friends had acquired new lives for themselves, being happier and more fulfilled. But she had missed just standing around chatting nonsense. The conversation didn’t hold much significance, there wasn’t much crucial information going around, or any sort of seriousness attached to it, just some mates having a chat. Y/N found herself wondering if Fatima and Ellie would come if she asked them out for lunch one day.
“I saw this documentary the other day, it’s on iPlayer,” Ellie said. “It was super interesting and disturbing.”
“Oh?” Y/N said, tipsy at this point and just holding the cup of wine in her hand, not wanting to drink more in case it would make her dizzy and very giggly.
“Yeah, it was basically about all these people who committed gruesome murders in the UK, and who go free now.”
Y/N looked up from her cup with wide eyes and at Ellie as Fatima gasped.
“Yeah, I can’t remember what it was called
” As Ellie started thinking, a shadow appeared beside Y/N and she jumped. The tall red-haired man standing beside Y/N only smiled at her, holding a hands up to indicate he was friendly.
Fatima clicked her tongue. “Are you trying to give her a heart attack, Cam?”
“No, I’m sorry, darl,” the man said, looking at Y/N as he held a hand out for her to shake. “Just saw an unfamiliar face and thought I’d introduce myself, is all. I’m Cameron.”
Y/N took a huge breath, meeting Ellie’s eyes before looking at Cameron and shaking his hand. “Y/N.”
“Y/N,” he mused under his breath, nodding his head as his hand fell to his side again. “Haven’t seen you around here before, Y/N.”
“I’ve only been here a month now.”
“Too bad we didn’t meet earlier, then.”
Y/N’s eyes widened a bit, the compliment taking her off guard. She only chuckled some, wrapping both her hands around her cup as she looked down at the liquid in it.
“When did you come back, Cam?” Ellie asked, crossing her arms over her chest.
“Two weeks ago. Are you on vacation here then, Y/N?” Cameron didn’t even spare Ellie a look, his undivided attention on Y/N as she continued to stare at her drink.
But suddenly a pair of black Converse appeared beside her bare feet. She felt a hand on her lower back, a warm and comforting pressure that slowly trailed its way to her waist, wrapping his fingers around her curves and bringing her toward him. Her figure fell against his, fitting against his side as if they’d done this before.
“That’s my girlfriend you’re trying to pull, Cam,” Harry said, his voice steady and a little darker than normal. Maybe it was the effect of the alcohol he had drunk this far or it being late, Y/N didn’t know, but she knew she liked it.
Cameron was quiet for a second. “Your girlfriend? Mate, you got a girlfriend?”
“This is her,” Harry continued.
“Ah, I’m sorry, Haz.”
“Don’t apologise to me, apologise to my girlfriend.”
Cameron smiled, as if he couldn’t believe Harry, but he met Y/N’s eyes. “I apologise, I didn’t know.”
Y/N nodded, not really knowing what else to say or do. Cameron looked at the other three, saying a quick goodbye before buggering off. As he disappeared, Harry’s hand slid back around her waist as he came to stand in front of Y/N. She felt his touch along her forearm, rough fingers caressing her with such sensitivity as if he was afraid of crossing a line. Whenever he touched her like this, she could tell by the rough skin of his hands that he wasn’t used to being gentle like this; wasn’t used to being careful when touching someone else. His work made him have rough skin and maybe even a rough touch, but he was always so incredibly cautious when he reached for Y/N.
He slid his hand into hers, squeezing her fingers as she wrapped them around him. Their eyes met and upon seeing him in front of her, seeing him this close, she felt her eyes widen a bit. Though the entire reason why he was doing this was because there were people around watching them, it still felt like everyone was intruding on a special moment between the two of them.
“You okay? Saw he made you jump a bit,” Harry said, hooded and glassy eyes searching her face.
“Yeah, I’m fine. Just came up out of nowhere,” Y/N answered, offering a smile because she knew Harry’s concern was genuine.
Y/N wasn’t sure if Ellie or Fatima noticed Harry’s slight hesitance because by the sound of it, they were chatting amongst themselves, but Y/N did. Harry leaned in, eyes on hers till he closed them. Every single hair on Y/N’s body shot up as Harry pressed his lips gently against her cheek. He was covering her view of Ellie and Fatima, so the two couldn’t see the immediate shock on Y/N’s face. Their conversation halted, she was aware of that, but all her attention was focused on Harry’s lips and how hot her entire body got in the matter of a second. She closed her eyes, eyelashes brushing his skin. Harry pulled away, resting the right side of his forehead against her left for a few seconds. She wondered if he could feel how hard her heart was beating, how clammy her hands were. Could he tell she wanted to reach for his neck and hold him there, but she was carrying her cup and her other hand was already holding his? Could he feel her breaths on his neck like she could feel his? Did he want to stay like that, safe in each other’s company and unbothered by everyone else, for the rest of the night?
“I’m sure there are taxis driving about town if you two wanna go home,” Ellie said, and Fatima cursed her right away.
Harry took a step away from Y/N, clearing his throat as a familiar redness came to his cheeks. His hand was about to fall away from hers, but she gripped his harder, not ready to let go yet. He gave Fatima and Ellie a tight-lipped smile before meeting Y/N’s eyes again, the muscles in his face relaxing.
“El, I need a refill,” Fatima said, and though Y/N couldn’t read their faces yet, she could kind of tell what that meant.
“Let’s go get you a drink then. See you two in a bit.” Ellie and Fatima walked off, falling into conversation right away.
Harry made sure they were completely alone, that no one was eavesdropping before he said lowly, “Sorry if that was too much, I just
 I just thought it’d look good, you know? To kiss my girlfriend- my pretend girlfriend around other people just to underline that we are
 you know
”
Y/N nodded, biting her lips together as she watched Harry continue to try and find his words.
“Also, sorry if you wanted to chat to Cameron, I’m
 I don’t want this to get in the way-“
“-I didn’t. I don’t.”
Silence stretched on, eyes on one another as the party continued around them. They didn’t have any regard for it as they kept their attention on one another. Y/N had answered so quickly and so honestly that it made her nervous when Harry didn’t say anything. Because it was true that she didn’t want to talk to Cameron, she didn’t know who he was and would probably never see him again. But she knew who Harry was, and she wanted to see him all the time. There was a comfort in his presence that settled over her like a warm, safe blanket. She liked being around him. She didn’t want to be near Cameron or anyone else.
“Do you think people think we’re a couple right now? Are we believable? Is this believable?” Harry mumbled.
Y/N giggled. “Well, you just kissed my cheek out of nowhere, I’d hope it’s somewhat believable and that they think we’re a couple.”
Harry laughed, looking down at their hands. “Yeah, it’s kind of
 it’s kind of easy, isn’t it?”
Y/N frowned. “What is?”
“Being like this with you. I might feel like a right idiot when I take your hand or kiss your cheek, but you don’t make me feel like one.”
She smiled.
“It’s natural. Not that
 that being in a relationship with you and acting like this is natural, I didn’t mean it like that, but it’s-“ He stopped himself looking up at her again as he bit his bottom lip, shrugging slightly. “-It’s like joking about with a friend and just having fun, feeling comfortable.”
“Yeah?”
“You know
 I hope I don’t sound like a melt and I’m probably only able to say this ‘cause I’m a tad tipsy,” Harry said, and Y/N giggled. “But you’ve become one of my best friends. If not best friend, a very good one. Like
 dunno, I can talk to you about anything, I don’t feel weird being silent around you, or saying or doing stuff that is weird, and I-I feel like you might feel the same way about me. At least I hope so.”
Her smile widened. “I do.”
He let out a small breath and Y/N chuckled.
“It’s sad that when this ends it’ll look weird if we remain friends, won’t it?” Y/N hated that she was thinking and talking about a time in the future they both knew was coming, but avoided talking about at all costs.
“What do you mean?”
“Well, do exes stay friends without it being weird to a degree? If you start dating someone for example, will our friends expect us to act a certain way, and if they do and we contradict their theory, will that make them suspicious of us?”
Harry furrowed his brows a little.
“I want to hang out with you and it’s sad to think that in August, we might have to part ways and never talk again ‘cause it’ll look
 weird. Dunno, I haven’t really gone through this before.”
Harry let out a breathy chuckle. “Neither have I.”
Y/N laughed.
“I mean, I’ve gone through a break-up, but not like this.”
Y/N nodded. “Yeah, I haven’t talked to my ex since it happened.”
They were quiet for a moment as Harry digested Y/N’s choice of words. “You haven’t talked to your ex since you broke up either? Like, at all?”
“He, uhm, he’s sent me texts, but I don’t want to talk to him.”
Harry must have noticed how little Y/N wanted to talk about her ex, because he looked down at their hands again and let their conversation end there. Y/N held her cup out for him and Harry took it, looking at it. He raised his eyebrows, silently asking if she wanted any more of it, but she shook her head. He poured it out in the sand.
“You’re enjoying yourself?” Harry asked after a little while, wiping something off the corners of his mouth with his free index and thumb.
“The party?” Y/N met Harry’s eyes and then searched for Ellie and Fatima, she’d have to find them later. “Yeah, it’s nice. I like your friends.”
“There are a couple more who want me to introduce you, so we’ll have to do that later if it’s okay.”
“Of course.”
Harry’s eyes fell to the now empty cup. “And are you enjoying yourself in St Ives?”
Y/N smiled. “I am, it’s fun.” As she laid extra pressure on the last word, Harry looked up and as she raised her eyebrows, he knew she was referring to them and their fake relationship. He chuckled and Y/N watched him.
“Is it everything you hoped it’d be?”
She was unsure what he was referring to, but she said, “More.”
“Yeah?”
“Yeah,” she answered, folding her hands.
“So, you’re
 you’re staying?” Pause. “Right?”
Confused, Y/N furrowed her brows at Harry, studying his face to try and find some sort of explanation to that utterance. She slowly opened her mouth, and said, “Staying?”
“Here.”
“On the beach?”
“No.”
“In St Ives?”
Something that could be interpreted as a nod happened, but no words left Harry’s lips. Instead, he continued to look at her, eyes searching her face as if he could find her answer somewhere there. A slight breeze blew past them, making a curl come loose and hang in front of Harry’s eye. He quickly pushed it away, not letting anything prevent him from seeing Y/N fully as she realised what Harry meant. Y/N felt his fingers brush her arm on their way down.
“Do you want me to stay?”
Harry didn’t say anything or nod this time around. Their eyes didn’t waver, looking at each other and not daring to look away. Y/N didn’t register till then how close they were standing. When the wind blew from behind Harry, she smelled his familiar scent and it made something inside her flutter. It was instinctive to look down at his lips, just as instinctive to look up and feel her breath hitch somewhere in her throat as she saw his lips part. Unapologetically, Harry’s eyes did the same that Y/N’s had done just a few seconds prior. A fire-hot shiver ran up her spine as he glanced at her lips, taking a step forward so that their hands rested against one another. Y/N wanted to look at his lips again, but she simply could not look away from his eyes. He was so close and she didn’t want to ruin it, didn’t want to look away.
“Do you think we’re believable now?” Harry whispered, his voice hoarse.
Y/N couldn’t bring herself to answer, she was waiting for something unspeakable; something that couldn’t be put into word for fear of the reality of those words being too raw, too true. She felt his curl against her forehead. His breath on her nose. Her body prickling with anticipation and confusion, unable to properly decipher if what was going on was all part of the show or if this was genuine. Harry was too respectable to make a move, and Y/N was too perplexed to do anything. If she kissed him, how would he feel? Would he take it as her being genuinely interested in him, or that they were just doing it to seem like a genuine couple? And if she kissed him, would she interpret it as her genuinely fancying him, or would she do it just to feed into their façade?
Before she could think about anything else, someone shouted something above the music and everyone else talking. It seemed to have caught quite a few people’s attention, because the volume on the beach lowered considerably. Harry tore his eyes away from Y/N and looked in the direction of the commotion. Y/N did as well, craning her neck to see beyond the group of people that were hugging and crowding what looked to be a new guest. Harry froze in front of Y/N and she looked at him, then back at the group.
“What’s going on?” she asked.
“My
” Harry mumbled, pausing for some seconds. “Emilia.”
Y/N looked back at Harry. “Emilia?”
Harry nodded.
“Your ex?”
“The one who lived in Munich for two years, yeah.” Harry ran a hand through his hair before he met Y/N’s eyes. “I haven’t seen her since she came back, think she came back sometime last week.”
“Do you want to go say hi?”
“I
” Harry glanced in Emilia’s direction again, clearly thinking it over thoroughly. “I mean
 yes, but
 she’d meet you as well. She’d have to.”
“Why?”
“’Cause Dax won’t be able to keep himself from bringing up the fact that I have a new girlfriend. Pretend girlfriend, but
 you know
”
Y/N nodded.
“If she knows I’m here and I’m with my new girlfriend, she’s gonna wanna meet you.”
She inhaled sharply. “Why would she want to meet the person you’re supposedly being intimate with now?”
Harry’s eyes grew wide for a single second before he composed himself, blinking himself back to reason. “Dunno. Emilia is very sociable. Just like you.”
“But she’d meet the person you’re with now, I don’t see why she’d want to meet them.”
“Maybe she’s happy for me, maybe she wants to meet someone who supposedly makes me happy,” Harry offered, shrugging his shoulders.
Y/N stared at him for a few seconds. “I know you said she didn’t want to be with you ‘cause it affected her mental health, and I get that, but leaving you when you were at your lowest is still an awful thing to do.”
Harry glanced at Y/N.
“And then not talking to you for two years after just sodding off to Munich. She doesn’t know what you’ve been through since then, do you think she’s gonna care now?”
Harry furrowed his brows. “Y/N, I loved Emilia.”
“I’m aware, but the people we love don’t have to love us back the same way we love them. One part always ends up loving more, feeling more, doing more. We can’t choose how much we love someone, and we don’t have a say in how they love us, but the fact of the matter is that if you love someone, you act like it. You let them know.”
Harry didn’t say anything, he just bit the inside of his cheek and continued to look at Y/N.
“I’m fully aware you loved Emilia, probably still do, but it doesn’t sit right with me that she just removed herself like that completely. You’re not a toxic person, you were just going through a rough time.”
“Harry!” Amir shouted, waving Harry and Y/N over. “Harry, mate!”
Harry watched Y/N for a few more seconds, probably either debating what she’d just said or losing every shred of respect he had for her, Y/N didn’t know. He nodded in the direction of everyone and the two started walking there, strolling the distance in silence. She didn’t know how she was supposed to interpret said silence, if it was a good kind or if he just didn’t want to talk to her for the rest of the night because he had taken offense to what she’d said.
When they reached the group, they made space for Harry and Y/N, and the first thing Y/N noticed was the brunette standing on the opposite side to the circle from them. Her blue eyes lit up when she saw Harry and she smiled at him instantly, clearly happy to see him after two years of no contact.
“Hi,” she exclaimed, crossing the circle, and giving Harry a hug. “It’s so good to see you again.”
“Yeah, you too,” Harry said. “How was Munich?”
“Amazing, I’m moving there permanently after University, I’m sure.” Emilia stepped away from Harry and immediately, her eyes fell on Y/N. “And this must be the girlfriend.”
Harry and Y/N’s eyes met, Harry raising his eyebrows in a quick “told you so”, which made Y/N smile some before turning back to Emilia.
“Yes, I guess I am. And you’re the ex.”
Harry shifted uncomfortably, shoving his hands into the pockets of his jeans as he looked from Y/N to Emilia and back again. It was evident that the rest of the group, and quite a few others as well, were watching this interaction with keen interest. They were probably waiting for one of them to start a fight and the other one to feed into it, something Harry would step in to stop and take sides, which would ultimately just end badly. It was clearly something a lot of people thought would be great entertainment. But Y/N kept her cool, not wanting to sound passive aggressive or make Harry uncomfortable. Though she was not impressed with Emilia’s past actions, she wasn’t about to judge her solely on them. Y/N hoped she was right not to.
“I am, it’s been so long since I’ve seen Harry.” Emilia looked back at Harry, considerably smaller than him, looking up at him through her lashes. “That rain check you were talking about, you could make up for it by walking me over to get a cup?”
Y/N looked at Harry, about to open her mouth and ask what rain check Emilia was talking about, but she realised it was none of her business. And questioning Harry like this in front of everyone would just feed into everything everyone wanted. So, Y/N just crossed her arms over her chest.
“Actually, we’re about to leave,” Harry said, giving Emilia a small smile.
Emilia pouted. “Really? It’ll only take you a minute.”
Harry opened his mouth to inhale hugely, looking over at Y/N who hoped he could tell she didn’t like this. But Harry met Emilia’s eyes again, taking a step back and Emilia grinned as the two started walking towards the table in the middle of the beach with all the cups. Y/N watched them, how easily they fell into conversation and how eager Emilia was to talk to Harry again. While witnessing this, Y/N kept reminding herself of what Harry had said earlier, about her becoming one of his closest friends. She hoped repeating that moment to herself would prevent her from getting hurt and sad and angry, but it didn’t. When turning back toward the gang, she realised both Ellie and Dax were watching Harry and Emilia as well. And upon taking a look around, she realised Jo, Amir, and Fatima were as well. Y/N didn’t know for what purpose, but if Dax’s tense jaw was any indicator, it couldn’t have been for a particularly good reason.
Why would Harry do that? Though Y/N wasn’t in a relationship with him, it was still embarrassing for her to have to stand there and wait for him. She felt ridiculous when Fatima met her eyes again, giving her an apologetic smile, one Y/N – Harry’s fake girlfriend – didn’t deserve, but she appreciated it nevertheless. Because despite everything, this hurt. She dug her nails into her upper arms as she stood there, mad at Harry for the first time ever. Though it had been gormless of Emilia to ask in the first place, Harry hadn’t really needed much persuasion.
As Emilia and Harry’s voices got louder, the gang started up a light conversation that Y/N pretended to be part of. She only gave Harry a slight glance before looking back at Dax who was talking, the guy not giving the returning two any of his attention either. Y/N wondered if Dax thought the same way about Emilia’s behaviour as she did, but then again, it wasn’t like Y/N could take Dax aside and ask him that. If Y/N sought Dax out to talk about Harry’s ex, it wouldn’t look good.
“Ready to leave?” Y/N asked, reaching into her tote bag for her cardigan. Some of her passive aggressiveness was detectable in her voice, she hoped no other than Harry picked up on it. She was still tipsy so she blamed her incapability to hold back on that.
“Yeah,” Harry said, standing very still as he watched Y/N put her cardigan on. Once it was on, she smiled at everyone, and then looked at Harry as he directed a “See ya, yeah?” at everyone. Though Dax was visibly sad the two were leaving, he seemed to know why they were bailing because he didn’t ask them why or stop them. Y/N put her shoes back on and the two started on their way back up the hill that led to the car park.
It was unexpected when Harry reached for her hand, intertwining his fingers with hers so slowly and so deliberately that she felt it in every single one of her cells. Though it was nice to feel him there, she had to bite her lip from saying anything as they walked up Burrow Road. The second they were out of sight and alone, Y/N let go of his hand. This wasn’t something Harry would’ve usually paid much attention had he not heard her passive aggression just a few moments earlier.
“Is it Emilia?” Harry asked.
It was stupid how the only time Harry managed to be blunt and upfront was when he knew he was in trouble or if someone was annoyed with him. At least Y/N thought so.
She straightened her back, wrapping her cardigan tighter around herself. “What about Emilia?”
“Is that why you’re all
 mad? Dunno if mad is the best word.”
“Think it describes how I’m feeling perfectly,” Y/N said. “’Cause I’d say I’m mad with a dash of disappointed.”
Harry looked over at her, frowning again. “Why?”
“Why am I mad you walked over there with Emilia?”
“Yeah.”
Y/N shrugged her shoulders exaggeratingly. “Call it intuition, call it paranoia, call it whatever you bloody want, but I think she wants you back now that you’re not broken up about your Dad anymore.”
Harry took a few seconds to say, “I’ll call that stupidity.”
The laugh that left Y/N was anything but friendly and warm. “Fine. Do whatever you want.”
“Why are you so mad about this anyway? It’s not like we’re
” Harry stopped himself, looking over at Y/N who refused to look at him. “It’s not like we’re a couple.”
“It’s still embarrassing. I was left standing there while my boyfriend walked off with his ex. You don’t even want to admit that what you did was stupid.”
“’Cause it’s not, we just walked down to that table so she could get herself a cup.”
Y/N sighed, running her hands over her face. “Yes, it’s an innocent act and I probably have no right to act like this, but I’m being a friend. I’m trying to look out for you.”
“Are you?”
“What?”
“Being a friend, looking out for me?”
Y/N looked at him, seeing his set jaw and piercing eyes. “Why wouldn’t I look out for you?”
“Right now you just seem mad I hung out with my ex.”
She glanced away again, so frustrated with him that she felt like screaming. They reached Back Road, Y/N walking straight ahead to take the quickest way back to the Inn, Harry was turning right to Clodgy. “Interpret it any way you want, Harry. I’m being truthful when I tell you I just want what’s best for you.”
There was a pause as Harry watched Y/N cross the road. “You’re just gonna leave like that? You don’t wanna talk it out?”
“You don’t understand where I’m coming from, Harry!” Y/N exclaimed as she faced him, turning her back on the dark alleyway behind her. “What’s the point?!”
“Y/N, it’s not like I’m making out with Emilia in front of everyone!”
“I know, but that small act of just walking down there has a lot of meaning! She wants to make up for lost time!”
“You’re just reading too much into this!”
“And you think the best of people who hurt you!”
“She left for her own good, don’t blame her for that!”
“I’m not! I just think it’s odd to not check up on you in those two years following your breakup when you were clearly having a tough time when she left!”
“Oh, my days, Y/N.” Harry ran his hands over his face and through his hair.
“I know you want to see the best in everyone, but I’ve experienced people fucking me over ‘cause I gave them the benefit of the doubt. Multiple times. I’m not doing that again, I’m-I’m just not. And I don’t want to watch that same thing happen to you.”
Harry blinked when Y/N cursed, but quickly regained himself. “I can take care of myself!”
“I’m just being a friend and looking out for you, I’m sorry if-“
“-And what if I don’t want you to look out for me as a friend?!”
Y/N was about to answer, but she felt something brush against her back and then a figure moving out of the dark alleyway behind her. Her heart skipped a beat and the next thing she knew, she felt it in her throat. She jumped out of the way, stepping just in the crack between two cobblestones and stumbling away from the stranger. The man looked at Y/N as she regained her balance, about to reach his hand out to help her when Harry rushed across the road. Y/N managed herself, but she took another step away from the stranger who genuinely looked baffled as to what had just happened. Y/N put a hand over her heart, feeling it beating furiously. Calm down, calm down, calm down, she told herself, feeling safer the second Harry put a hand to her upper arm.
“You alright, miss?” the man asked, looking at Harry who was standing beside Y/N, making sure she was okay.
“Sorry,” Y/N said, doing her best to give him a smile. “I’m just a bit jumpy. And a tad drunk.”
He laughed joyously before continuing on his way, and the second he turned away, Y/N’s face fell. Harry noticed and turned her to face him, squeezing her shoulders so she’d look at him. She balled her hands into fists as she felt her heart beating hard, calming down from the sudden rush of adrenaline.
“You’re okay,” he said, recognising her reaction from that first time she read to him in the grass beside the lighthouse.
Y/N nodded, meeting Harry’s eyes and telling herself it was all fine. She would be fine. Harry was here and nothing would happen to her while he was here. She continued to look at him till she was calmer, but the thought of walking down that dark alleyway now made her want to hurl. However, she didn’t have any other place to walk and she had to get back somehow. Maybe she could call Bessie and talk to her, or maybe she could find another and maybe longer route back. But then she’d be out in the open longer than she initially wanted to.
“Have you always been like that?” Harry asked, the question curious and without any hint of judgement.
“Like what?”
“Paranoid.”
Y/N smiled a little as if that would brighten the mood that had fallen considerably. Slowly, she nodded, averting her eyes from Harry’s. “I like being prepared for anything, for any possible outcome.”
Harry didn’t remove his hands from where they rested on her shoulders.
“So, I either make them up, or if something happens unexpectedly, my brain does this thing where it tells me that the worst possible thing is happening, and I need to escape.”
“What’s the worst possible thing that can happen?”
“In any scenario?”
“Yeah.”
Y/N watched as someone turned every light in their flat off, wishing she was in her bed right now. “That my Dad finds me.”
Harry stayed quiet.
“He terrifies me. Always has. I know he won’t hurt me, but
 he’s a bad man, Harry. A very bad man.”
“He won’t come here, Y/N. You’re safe in St Ives.”
Some part of her laughed at that, but when she met his eyes, she knew he genuinely meant it. If Harry was there, he would not let anything happen to her. No matter what. Even if they had a disagreement the second before her Dad showed up. But her father knew where she was and if he wanted her back, he would do what he could to get her back. A lighthouse keeper wouldn’t stand in his way.
Y/N felt her bottom lip starting to wobble at the thought of it, and she put a hand in front of her mouth when the back of her eyes started to sting.
“Hey,” Harry said, squeezing her shoulders. “Let’s go back to mine, yeah? You won’t have to be alone.”
She met his eyes, blinking a few times as she processed his offer. “Yours?”
“Yeah, if you’re a bit shaken up, I thought you might
 might not want to be alone.”
Without really registering what she was doing, Y/N was nodding her head to answer his question. “If you’re sure I won’t be a burden in any way-“
“-Flower, you’re never.”
She almost thought she heard him incorrectly. Flower. She had never gotten a nickname before. Her friends back home used to call her ‘babe’ and her mother would sometimes call her ‘sweetheart’ and Bessie referred to her as ‘dear’, but never this one. She suddenly felt a little lightheaded.
Harry wrapped an arm around her and held her to him as they walked through the city. He hummed to The Power of Love as they strolled, keeping the empty and quiet streets of St Ives alive as long as they were walking through them. Y/N looked about them, staring down alleyways and streets, sometimes being too afraid to even to study the shadows or look to make out silhouettes in the darkness. Harry’s humming kept her grounded and reminded her that she wasn’t alone. Once they were walking along the road up to Clodgy Point, Harry let go of her, letting her walk by herself. It was starting to get a bit chilly when the winds of the moors started up around them, so Y/N reached for Harry’s knitted jumper in her tote bag and gave it to him. He was a bit taken aback by that, seemingly having forgotten it was there, but he thanked her, the only two words being uttered at all on their 30-minute walk up to the lighthouse.
Harry unlocked the door and walked in first, turning the light on the coffee table on as Y/N locked the front door. He opened a window to let some air in, then took his jumper and shoes off. Y/N did the same, wrapping her arms around herself. She was aware it had been Harry’s idea for her to stay here, but she suddenly felt like she was intruding. This was his space and his bedtime routine. They had walked off most of their drunkenness, so when Y/N tripped over her own feet a bit, it was purely from exhaustion. Harry was almost about to reach out and catch her even though he was across the room, but his dedication to help her made her chuckle a little. Harry smiled at the sound of it.
Y/N put her tote bag on one of the chairs, putting her cardigan over the back of it as well.
“I
” Harry started, making Y/N look over at where he stood by his dresser. “I have a few shirts and stuff if you wanna freshen up some.”
Y/N chuckled. “What do you mean?”
Realising he probably didn’t make sense, Harry let a breath escape his lips as well. “I meant, if you wanna have a shower, I’ll lend you a tee shirt.”
The thought of showering in Harry’s space seemed almost a bit surreal, but for some reason, also completely normal. She spent so much time here and with him that in a way, it was weird that she hadn’t showered here before. She slowly nodded her head, and Harry opened a drawer, pulling out an old tee white shirt with a small Elton John logo on the chest.
“Towels,” Harry said, walking over to his tiny bathroom and turning the lights on for her. “They’re here, and I got everything you might need in the shower. There’s an unused toothbrush in the cabinet under the sink.”
“Thank you.”
Harry gave her a smile before closing the door. Taking a breather first, the next thing Y/N did was get undressed and take that shower. She washed away the argument with Harry and the reason why it was cut off so abruptly; tried to soak herself in everything else that happened tonight that made her entire body warm. When Harry kissed her cheek; the way his hot lips felt against her skin, how the thought of that moment alone made her feel some type of way. She knew Harry only did it so everyone would think they were a couple, but her cheek was tingling.
She got out of the shower, drying herself off, and putting Harry’s tee shirt on, her skirt under it. Yes, the two were starting to get comfortable around one another, but she wasn’t sure if they were just there yet. Last thing she wanted to do was walk out there in her knickers and one of his tee shirts, then make him uncomfortable in any way. Though she felt like a raisin since she was not doing her usual post-shower skin routine, nor any hair products for her hair, she told herself she’d do it tomorrow when she was back to the Inn.
She walked outside to see Harry laying in his bed, his small telly that was stood by his couch, turned around so he could watch a rerun of an old Would I Lie To You episode. When the bathroom door opened, he instantly looked in her direction, placing his hands on either side of his form as if he got ready to get up. Their eyes met and his eyes fell to her tee shirt, where the material hugged her waist firmly. He met her eyes again, swallowing thickly before he gestured beside him at two glasses of water.
“One by the window is yours.”
“I’m literally so thirsty, thank you.”
Harry smiled, walking past Y/N and into the bathroom, going to take his own shower. Y/N sat down in Harry’s bed, nuzzling under the covers and taking a hold of her glass. She brought it to her lips, sipping it till it was empty, watching the telly as she did. She got up for a refill, drank half, and then just continued to watch the telly for a bit. The light in the room was dim enough so she could easily fall asleep, and she almost did drift off against the headboard, but then Harry exited the bathroom and woke her up with a start.
“Oh!” he exclaimed. “Sorry, did I wake you?”
She smiled, sinking down into the pillow. “Almost went off to dreamland there.”
“Soz.”
“I’m a light sleeper, it’s not your fault.”
Harry nodded, walking over to turn the lights off, the only light in the entire little cottage now being the light from the telly. He strolled over to the fridge and took a cucumber out. Y/N watched him as he brought a knife out, cutting it up in half.
“You hungry?” he asked.
“Just brushed my teeth.”
“So did I, but after I’ve been out, I usually eat half a cucumber before bed.”
Y/N stared at him.
“What?”
“Just
 just a cucumber? Nothing else?”
“What else? Do you spice your cucumber? With what?” Harry looked at his little box of spices by his stove. “Onion granules?”
Y/N laughed, placing her hands on the duvet above her stomach.
“I actually had jalfrezi leftovers after we went to the pub a few weeks ago,” Harry said as he came over to the bed, giving Y/N half the cucumber. “So I dipped my cucumber in that and ate it.”
Y/N grimaced. “Were you still pissed?”
“No,” Harry chuckled. “I just like cucumber and Indian food.”
“Fair enough.”
Harry picked up one of his quilts and sat down in bed beside Y/N, draping it over himself so she could have the duvet for herself. He bit into his half of the cucumber, completely unfazed as his eyes fell on the telly. Y/N tried not to laugh, but he looked so incredibly cute, munching on his cucumber and smiling at something Rob Brydon said. He must’ve noticed her not eating, because he looked down at where she laid in bed, raising his eyebrows.
“You weren’t hungry?”
“It’s not that.”
“It’s honestly refreshing.” Harry took another bite. “I love it.”
That made her smile and she took a bite of her cucumber as well, Harry watching her as she chewed and then swallowed.
“Well
? Your verdict?”
“It’s just a cucumber.”
Harry rolled his eyes, making Y/N laugh again. “You’re humiliating.”
“Says the person who eats half a cucumber before bed!”
“I’m quirky!”
Laughing again, the two fell into comfortable silence as they watched the rest of the Would I Lie To You episode. Though the idea of eating half a cucumber hadn’t been very appealing to begin with, it did make her feel a bit better. She didn’t know she’d been hungry till now, the cucumber and the two glasses of water had done a well enough job to fill her stomach up before bed, so she didn’t bother asking Harry if she could make herself a toastie. Instead, Y/N found her eyes falling shut, her entire body relaxing completely. All the worry and the paranoia and the fight earlier all came together now, making her so tired she could barely stand to keep her eyes open. Her entire body ached with the effort it took to stay awake. She stayed as close to the wall as possible, where she could look out across the dimly lit lightkeeper house.
Y/N felt the move as Harry reached out to the windowsill. He sat back, screwing the lid open, revealing a balm of some sort. He rubbed his middle finger in it, slowly sliding it along the thick balm till his finger was wet with it. Y/N bit her bottom lip. For some reason, she thought he was going to smear it across his own lips, some sort of cream to help keep his lips moisturised. No, instead Harry dragged his finger under his eyes. Not directly under his eyes, but along his cheekbones, slowly and gently.
“What’s that?” Y/N asked through a yawn.
Harry looked away from the telly and at her. “Face cream.”
“You put it on before bed?”
“It helps me sleep, it’s made of lavender and apricot. Both are supposed to help you fall into a deep sleep.”
“Can I try?”
“Yeah.” Harry handed it over, leaning his head back against the headboard, watching Y/N as she smelled it.
“Lush.”
“It is.”
Y/N rubbed her finger in it, putting it along under her eye. She was aware Harry was keeping an eye on her, but she pretended to find the programme incredibly interesting right then. She heard a slight chuckle.
“Not directly under your eyes,” Harry said. “Not there.” He leaned over, taking a delicate grip of her wrist and moving her hand down. “Here.” His hand moved upward to cup hers, his little finger, ring finger, and middle finger hooking themselves tenderly between her thumb and index. His index rested on top of hers as he guided her hand slowly and gently, tipping his head to the side to rest against the headboard while he concentrated. She didn’t dare look away from the telly, too overwhelmed to do anything but let him help her.
“Then the other eye,” he mumbled, telling her what was going to happen next. Because without warning, he dipped his finger in the balm Y/N was holding, swirling his finger slowly around till it was moist. When he did that, she simply could not help herself, and her eyes fell to look at his hand, taken aback by what was happening. However, she didn’t move or tell him to stop when Harry brought his hand up, sliding it over her cheekbone. Soft, slow, graceful. A prickling hot sensation followed where he touched, slowly spreading through her entire body. She looked away from the balm and at Harry, the second she did, he glanced back at her. A slight breath left her lips, Harry’s eyes falling to them. She sat up, finding the lid and placing it back on the balm. She handed it back to Harry.
Harry took it, placing it back in the windowsill before he got up from bed. Y/N lay back down, quickly checking the pulse on her neck because she knew her heart was beating hard. If it beat hard enough, would it somehow make the bed creak? Was it possible her heartbeat made her entire body shake like that? Just in case, Y/N switched so she was laying on her side. She watched as Harry turned the telly off, the room falling into complete darkness. Y/N closed her eyes, realising for the first time in a minute or two how sleepy she actually was.
It took a second or two before she felt the bed move and creak as he sat down. He shuffled till he was comfortable laying on his side facing her. Only reason she knew that was because she heard his content sigh and felt his breath on her face. It had been quiet for a minute or so before Harry whispered her name.
“Hm?” she asked, opening her eyes slightly. She could not make out much, but she thought she might’ve seen him looking at her. That might also just be her imagination playing tricks on her.
“I’m sorry about earlier,” he said, his voice a whisper.
“I’m sorry, too.”
“I know you’re just looking out for me and I’m sorry if it was embarrassing for you when I did that.”
“I’m sorry I criticised her for leaving you when it was bad for her mental health, I just know that it can’t have been easy to have been in your shoes just then, so that break up can’t have been easy to deal with on top of everything else.”
Silence stretched on for a few seconds. “It wasn’t. But I don’t blame her for leaving if that was what was best for her.”
Y/N closed her eyes again. “Okay.”
She felt the bed move again as Harry found a new position that was more comfortable. The pillow she rested her head on moved a bit, she reckoned he slung his arm over the top of her head.
“Goodnight, Y/N,” Harry said, voice slurring now as well.
“Night.”
“My alarm will go off at 3am, by the way.”
She smiled. “I know.”
She heard him let out a slight breath, sounding like a small chuckle, and the next thing she knew, she was having the slumber of her life.
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fangirling-is-my-passion · 4 years ago
Text
🎃 Halloween Special 🎃 (Draco Malfoy x Reader)
Warnings: none, according to me
Summary: It’s your fifth year at Hogwarts and you decide to change things up a little bit by making a mix between muggle and magical traditions in Halloween.
A/N: Hellooooo, lovelies! I know it's been ages since the last time I posted any of my writings, but I got this idea the other day and I just couldn't let it die in my drafts. It's my first time writing for Draco, so if there's any mistake or stuff way too out of character, please, have mercy on me... 😔🙏 I love you and I really hope you enjoy it! Happy Halloween! :) <3
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October was finally coming to its end and Halloween was just around the corner, so everybody's excitement was palpable. The Halloween celebration at Hogwarts was one of the most expected by the students and you were definitely not the exception, nonetheless, after already four years of spending the holiday the wizard style, you were kind of starting to miss the muggle celebrations you were so used to when you were only a child.
You missed the costumes so much. Everything was really cool, but why didn't wizards dress up for Halloween? I mean, can you imagine the possibilities?
And so your idea was born: A Halloween celebration in Hogsmeade with your friends and anybody else who wanted to join, but with costumes, like muggles did. It was going to be a little bit of a mix between the two worlds. And it was going to be fantastic.
"Guys, guys, guys, guys, guys!" you said excitedly on Monday morning, sitting at the Gryffindor table in a rush, "I was thinking, why don't we throw a costume party in Hogsmeade the night of Halloween? It could even be at the Three Broomsticks, if we ask for permission, of course, I gotta check that, but, a costume party! What do you think?"
"You mean like the muggle tradition?" asked Hermione.
"Yes! Exactly! I actually don't quite understand why wizards don't dress up for Halloween, but whatever. I think this would be great!"
"Of course, sounds amazing, (Y/N)! But we gotta plan it very well, so I'll help you with the organisation," said Hermione with a lopsided smile.
"Well, sounds like fun, so count me in," said Ron, "By the way, (Y/N), can you pass me the sausages, please?"
"Sure, there you go..."
"I'm definitely in too. It would be my first time dressing up for Halloween, so I wouldn't miss it for the world," Harry added, "Dudley was the one who went trick-or-treating every year; meanwhile I stayed at home, either inside the cupboard or doing whatever chores my aunt could come up with."
"Blimey, Harry, that sucks..." Ron commented before placing another sausage on his plate, which was already brimming with food. Harry simply shrugged.
"Erm, well, great then! I think..." you paused for a second and then added," Let's tell everybody else!"
"Who are you planning to invite?" Hermione questioned; she was definitely taking this organisation thing very seriously.
"I was thinking of simply spreading the word, so anybody who wants to can join."
"Oh, all right. That sounds fine," she said, although she didn't sound entirely convinced.
"Are you going to invite your boyfriend then?" Ron inquired with a sly look on his face.
"Oh, he's not my boyfriend! We're just... acquaintances... who hated each other in the past... but not anymore..."
He referred to no other than Draco Malfoy, the so called Slytherin Prince. At the very beginning of your Hogwarts days, you honestly couldn't stand each other, with all his arrogance and his superiority complex, however, at some point and for some strange and unknown reason to you, he stopped being an utter arsehole, your mutual teasing became more of an inside joke than actual bullying and you kinda started getting along. At least you were able to be in the same room without trying to hex one another.
"Yeaaah, of course, and who also study together in the library..." Ron continued.
"That happened one time!" you exclaimed, a flush creeping across your cheeks, "Or was it twice?"
"Twice" Harry and Ron answered in unison.
"Actually," Hermione interrupted, "it happened three times if we count the one where they had to work on the potions project together."
"But that does not count! It was a project! We had to!"
"Mmmmm, it counts because you chose to work together" she explained, a sly tone in her voice.
"That was just because he's the only Slytherin I've had an actual, relatively decent interaction with... Seriously, Hermione? That's not even the point here, guys, let's focus. And yes," you said making emphasis en the 'yes', "I am going to invite him, 'cause, why not? He's probably going to instantly reject the idea anyways, you know how he is." You crossed your arms over the table and took a deep breath.
"Wow", said Ron, "I can't believe you actually said all that without pausing to breathe. However," he said emphasising that last word," I'm telling you, (Y/N), you're gonna end up together. But if you're so sure of the contrary, let's make a bet."
"What?"
"Yes, whoever loses will have to do the winner's homework for a week." Ron smirked.
"A week! Are you nuts?" you exclaimed.
"Well, you have nothing to worry about... Unless you do think you're gonna end up being Malfoy's girlfriend..." His smirk widened and your cheeks went a little pinker than they already were.
"All right, fine. It's settled then. I only hope you're ready to do all my homework for a week, Ronald Weasley."
"We'll see about that."
After a busy and tiring week trying to plan an amazing Halloween party at the same time as doing all your class work, Saturday had finally arrived and everybody was filled with excitement. The news of your party had spread like wildfire and soon you and Hermione had to recalculate the supplies you'd need in order to have enough for every single person who wanted to drop by.
Also, you'd indeed told Draco about the party, nonetheless, just as you thought it would be, he didn't seem very excited about the whole idea... Well, yeah, he might have implied that he would never in his right mind attend a muggle celebration like that and that you were nuts to think of the possibility, however!, he didn't really, explicitly say no, so you'd taken his response as a maybe and still hoped he'd go for at least a little while (wait, why were you hoping that? It's not like you cared that much about him attending or not... Right?)
Since you'd been very busy with all the planning, you'd started working on your costume a little bit late, but you were very satisfied with the result: you were going to be Medusa. I mean, she's iconic! Being able to turn people into stone if they look you in the eye? Wicked! (At some point Harry made a joke comparing Medusa to a basilisk, and I mean, sure, but to be honest he really had to work on his humour). You'd even enchanted a diadem with snakes so they moved like they were alive! (Because, come on, you were committed to this holiday, but let's be sensible, you weren't going to wear actual snakes on your hair, there are levels).
The point is that, like everyone else, you were incredibly excited about your party. And also a bit nervous, you didn't want to screw something up, but you also knew not everything could be perfect and what mattered most was that everybody had fun.
"(Y/N)! Are you ready? We gotta get going!" Hermione called from outside the bathroom of your dormitory. You opened the door and stepped out, ready to rock and roll.
"So? How do I look?" you asked, twirling so she could take a look of your whole costume.
"Intimidatingly gorgeous."
"Oww! Thank you! Wait," you said now focusing on Hermione's costume," what are you wearing? No, no, not that, forget that, but why didn't you tell me you were going to be greek goddess, Hermione?"
"For your information, I am Athena," she said and imitated your twirl, "and I wanted it to be a surprise, I kind of got the idea thanks to you, when you told me you were going to be Medusa."
"Well, yeah... It's perfectly okay, but I would've liked to know before! Also, dressing up as specifically Athena is so you, Hermione, and you look gorgeous, seriously, I'm in love with you. Draco Malfoy who?"
"Is that a confession?" questioned Hermione with a sly smile.
"It's a joke" you clarified rolling your eyes but with a lopsided smile on your face.
"Yeah, sure, truly convincing," your friend said with sarcasm "Anyways, we gotta go now, come on!"
And off you went. You met Harry and Ron in the Gryffindor common room (Harry had dressed up as a Gryffindor quidditch player who'd been hit in the head by a bludger, and Ron was simply wearing a Chudley Cannons uniform. Boy, if these guys were obsessed with quidditch...) and the four of you headed happily towards the entrance of the castle, where all the students gathered before going to Hogsmeade. In your way there you were able to see a lot of different costumes from the students who were attending your party and you were deeply amused (and amazed) by they're creativity. Wizards should definitely do this more often.
When you finally arrived to the Three Broomsticks, you found the entire place decorated just as you'd imagined, and Madam Rosmerta (whom you'd previously sent a letter asking for her permission to use the place for your party in exchange of a reasonable amount of money, and she very kindly had agreed and even offered to help you with the organisation and setting the ambience too) was just applying the final touches.
"Oh, hello, dears!" she greeted you with a smile; she really was a very beautiful woman, no wonder why Ron and many other students fancied her, "So? What do you think? Is it like you imagined?"
"It definitely is!" you exclaimed looking around the place in awe, "It's truly fantastic, thank you so, so much! Now all we got to do is wait for everybody else to arrive!"
It didn't take too long before the first group of students entered the place, only a couple of minutes after the time of the appointment, and from then on, people just kept flooding the pub.
"All right, guys!" you shouted over the murmurs of the crowd so everybody could hear you and be quiet while you spoke, "Here's what we've got: You are allowed to order two butterbeers free of charge, however, if you want more you'll have to pay them yourselves. Now, there's relatively decent food on that table," you pointed to the table on the corner at your left side," and in that other table next to the entrance you will find a bunch of various sweets that are definitely unhealthy if eaten in excess, so, please, don't get too excited, people," the multitude before you chuckled and you smiled widely," Also, dear Colin here offered to take pictures of whoever asked him to, so if you want one, just let him now... Ah! And I almost forgot, there will be a costume contest at the end, so be sure to write your name down on the scroll that's on that wall,"you said and pointed to the wall opposite to you," if you want to participate. I think that's all for now, so enjoy the party, and Happy Halloween, everybody!"
The crowd cheered and applauded you before returning to their chatting or heading straight to where the food was. You walked towards the bar to tell something to Madam Rosmerta and soon some upbeat Halloween-themed music started playing. At some point, a few students took a corner of the place as improvised dance floor and, frankly, everything was even better than how you'd pictured it at first. And that was saying something.
"Amazing party, (Y/N)! You should totally do this more often!" cheered Fred and George Weasley about and hour after the beginning of the party. They'd dressed up as some quite creepy zombie conjoint twins and you thought it was brilliant.
"Thank you, guys! I'm glad you're having fun!" you shouted over the music, "By the way, I think your costume is brilliant, suits you perfectly!"
"Thanks! Hope it's enough to win that costume contest of yours, but being honest, there's a lot of competition here," Fred replied.
"Yeah, I mean, just look at your costume! You look fantastic!" George continued.
"Oww, well, luckily for you, I'm going to be a judge, so I'm not participating..."
The conversation went on for a couple more minutes until Lee Jordan called the twins to the dance floor.
Although the party was an absolute hit, you couldn't help but think about a certain someone who wasn't there.
"You look a bit disappointed," said Hermione from behind you, making you jump a bit, "Thinking about somebody who didn't come, perhaps?"
Sometimes it was truly scary how Hermione could know so much.
"What? No! What are you talking about?" you asked trying to brush the topic off.
"Will you please stop trying to deny your feelings, (Y/N)?" Hermione crossed her arms over her chest. "Look, it's pretty obvious that Malfoy isn't indifferent to you and, to be fair, I don't really mind! I mean, he's been a lot less annoying since you two started to get along a little better, so go ahead if you fancy him!"
"But what if I don't want to fancy him, Hermione?" you exclaimed finally giving in, "He was pretty awful to us in our first years and, yes, maybe we get along now, and he's been a lot better but... I just... I don't know! I guess I feel a bit guilty about it... Besides,he can still be considerably rude sometimes towards people and, even if we left that aside, what makes you think that he could possibly fancy me? I mean, come on, he didn't even come! And I don't... I don't want to be all head over heels for him or anything, and that's also the reason why I keep denying it! If I talk about it, it becomes more real, so maybe if I simply ignore it, my feelings will go away soon enough!"
Luckily for you, you were wearing your green Medusa makeup, otherwise Hermione would have been able to see your cheeks turn bright red.
"Okay, I understand that..." she said, "But I think you got something wrong there, (Y/N), he did come..."
"What?!"
"He just arrived, look, there he is! It's like you invoked him" You turned to look were Hermione had her eyes fixed. And, of course, she was right, there he was. Looking quite dreamy, but you shouldn't think about that, should you? "I'd give you my whole pep talk, but there's no time, you've got more important things to take care of right now. Just, I don't know, let it flow, okay?... But go on, then! Go with him!" she hurried you. You did as you were told and walked towards him changing your mood instantly and pretending that the previous conversation with Hermione had never happened. Just act normal, you thought.
"So you came!" you greeted him once you'd reached him.
"I did," Draco asserted, "Medusa, huh?" he said looking at you up and down with a raised eyebrow and... was that the spirit of a smirk? Once more your makeup helped you hide your blushing and you tried to act like there weren't some butterflies fluttering in your stomach.
...Ugh, this was exactly why you didn't want to admit you fancied him in the first place!
"Indeed," you replied smirking, "And a vampire, eh? Pretty simple if I'm honest, but you look good."
"I always look good, (Y/L/N), but if I'm honest," he said imitating your tone, "you look pretty good too."
"I always look good, Malfoy."
You explained him what you'd told the crowd at the beginning of the party and he decided to order a butterbeer. Then the conversation between the two of you simply kept on going without much difficulty; for some strange reason the fact that you had feelings for him and yet apparently not a single thing in common with him didn't affect your communication.
"All right, but this is insane," he said at some point, " how did you manage to pull this off? I mean, it must have cost you quite a fortune..."
"Well, I did get help from my friends with the budget, but, yes, I had to negotiate with my parents and trade my Christmas and birthday presents of the next year for some money to do this right."
"You're bloody insane..."
"I think you made that pretty clear when I first invited you to come, and yet here you are," you said with sufficiency, "so I guess I'm not the only one here who's gone a bit nuts."
He huffed and took another sip of his butterbeer. In that moment, Ginny Weasley, Parvati Patil and Hermione, who were currently dancing among a bunch of other students, called you and gestured at you to go dance with them. You nodded and turned to Draco in order to tell him that he could stay there while you danced for a while, but before you could articulate anything he said:
"No way you're leaving me here, you're the only person I can actually interact with in a mildly pacific way, so I'm sticking with you."
"Okay... But you're gonna have to dance, then."
"And you think am not qualified for the task?" he asked with his usual smirk.
"Are you really always such a showoff?"
"Only when I'm trying to impress somebody," that answer definitely took you by surprise, but you didn't have the chance to say anything, 'cause he added, "Go on, then, they're waiting for you. I'll go right behind."
And so you danced with your friends. And he danced. And you two danced together. And it was pretty unbelievable for everyone, including you, but nobody seemed to mind since they had never seen Draco in such an unproblematic mood.
A couple of hours later, the costume contest finally took place. The prize for the winner was a special package of sweets you'd prepared plus five galleons... Yeaaah, you'd definitely put a lot of effort in the planning of your party, and it had been completely worth it so far.
All the participants formed a line so each one could walk around showing their costume just as if it were a fashion runway. Meanwhile, you were arranging the seats for the judges. And, as a matter of fact, you had one judge missing. Your intention at first had been that there were four judges in the panel, nonetheless, since both Harry and Ron had declined the offer because they wanted to participate, you were only three: Madam Rosmerta, Hermione and yourself. And all the people you trusted also wanted to take part in it, so it seemed that you'd have to settle with only three judges. Unless...
"Hey, Draco!" Wait, since when did you address him by his first name? Oooh, this was getting out of control... You shouldn't have said anything!
"What is it?" he asked from the seat he had taken at some nearby table, just like all the other students who wouldn't take part in the contest, and were happy to simply watch, had done.
"Well, I was wondering..." you began doubtfully, "if you would like to be a judge too?"
"Me? A judge?" He frowned. "Why?"
"Because I wanted there to be four, but I've got one missing. And I think you'd make a fair judge, as long as you keep your good mood and you're not rude to our contestants... So?" you said bitting your lip.
"Erm, all right. Can't promise I won't be tough on them, though" there was that smirk again.
"Oh, shut up," you said playfully," You can be tough, just not rude. There's a difference."
And so the contest began.
An hour flew by and sooner than you'd expected, you found yourself deliberating with your three judges on whose costume was the best. A task which was pretty hard to do. Harder than you'd expected, actually.
At the moment, you had managed to leave only three finalists, each one provided by one of your fellow judges, and you were the one with the final word. The problem was that you couldn't make up your mind.
"I'm telling you!" Hermione insisted, "Harry's costume should win! It's creative and original and very thorough!"
"Granger, you're only saying that because he's your friend," intervened Draco," but come on! That kid with the Dementor costume? He is literally floating! And he's like in second grade or so! I really think he's the one who should win."
"Well, he definitely portrays a dementor better than you did in third year..." the girl countered.
"All right, guys, don't fight, we gotta make a decision quickly and you're getting on my nerves. Yes, both of you..."
"I still say that those Weasley twins are a lot of fun... They should win if you ask me," Madam Rosmerta mentioned, already losing interest in the matter; looking at three teenagers argue over a costume contest wasn't exactly her definition of "fun".
"Yeah, but they're costume is not as complex as Harry's, (Y/N)!" Hermione reiterated.
"But Potter is not floating, now, is he?" Draco retorted.
"Merlin's beard, you guys! Will you both please shut up?" you scolded, "If I'm completely honest, I wouldn't even consider any of them as my first option, I would choose Padma Patil!" you paused for a second thinking what to say next to state your point, "I mean, she dressed up as Celestina Warbeck! Are you joking? That's bloody brilliant if you ask me! And not only that but she brought Lavender, Parvati and that other girl whose name I don't remember at the moment as her Banshees! Come on! Creative, original... Besides, look at her dress! It looks pretty thorough to me! And yeah, she may not be floating," you added turning to Draco," but she's enchanted her necklace to play 'You stole my cauldron but you can't have my heart' to look like she's actually singing!"
There were a couple of seconds of silence, until Draco decided to break it.
"Then why on earth didn't you say that from the very beginning, (Y/L/N)?"
"Because you were so determined to say who you thought should win that I didn't want to cause more trouble with the decision!"
"Well, as a matter of fact, it makes it a lot easier for me," said Madam Rosmerta, "that girl and her friends were my second option. I simply love Celestina Warbeck."
"She was my third option, so I guess I don't mind," Draco stated shrugging and then leaned back on his chair.
You looked at Hermione.
"Well, yeah... She wasn't in my top three, but it's fine for me", she didn't sound entirely convinced, but it was enough.
"Okay, then..." you said finally, a little surprised by the result, yet satisfied," Brilliant! Then we've got our winner!"
The four of you stood up; Hermione, Draco and you walked to the center of the improvised runway while Madam Rosmerta simply returned to the back of the bar, clearly not wanting to take part in the decision-making of some fifteen-year-olds anymore.
"So, before we announce our winner, I wanted to say something," you began, "As you can see, it was quite difficult for us to make a decision, because all of your costumes are amazing. I truly think so! You're so creative and fun, and believe me when I say that if I had a larger budget I'd probably give prizes to all of you," you chuckled softly, " unfortunately, it isn't the case, so we had to choose only one... Are you ready to know who won?"
The multitude shouted a very enthusiastic "Yes" as response.
"All right, then... Padma Patil, congratulations, you and your Banshees are the winners!"
There were cheers, applause and a few disappointed sighs, but everybody seemed to be as satisfied with the decision as you. You gave the four girls their prize and the music started playing once more. However, the party was coming to its end and a lot of people were already saying their goodbyes and leaving. Therefore, before anything else could happen, you grabbed Draco's arm and dragged him all the way to where Colin Creevy was taking a few pictures of some third year students.
"What are you doing?"
"We're gonna take some pictures," you stated, "I've already got a few with Harry, Ron and Hermione, but since you arrived late..."
He didn't even get the chance to protest, because in that moment the third year students left and you dragged him once more to the spot where they'd been posing.
"What the... What am I supposed to do?" he inquired with a slight note of panic in his voice.
"Dunno, just think of cool poses! We've got two shots, so think fast!"
Your first shot was of you two in an average pose, you know, just smiling, you leaning on his shoulder, his arm around your waist and the butterflies in your stomach going a bit crazier about it.
"What now?!"
"I don't know! It's not like I'm used to doing this!" he exclaimed.
"I thought you were Draco bloody Malfoy, aren't you known enough to get a lot of pictures? You should be used to it!"
"I don't get a lot of fun pictures with weird poses!"
"Well, think of something then!" Colin could do nothing but stare in amusement at your absurd argument, trying to suppress his laughter.
"You think of something!" Draco countered.
"Why am I the one who always has to think of everything? Use your brain, mister!"
And you'd barely finished your sentence when, without a warning and almost against any common sense left on both of you, Draco's lips crushed against yours, his hands grabbing the sides of your face eagerly. Only an instant later he pulled away and looked at you, with his usually pale cheeks coloured in a bright shade of pink and his moon-like eyes reflecting the panic of maybe having done something very wrong. However, he quickly intended to hide it:
"Was that a proper use of my brain, miss?
You were flabbergasted. Totally. The whole night had been utter madness for you since this boy arrived... But it wasn't a bad type of madness, you were delighted. You fancied him. And now you knew that it was mutual.
"Well... Sure... but why did you stop?" you murmured, just inches away from his face, and then smiled bitting your lip. You saw his whole face lighten up as he smiled broadly, just before leaning in to kiss you once more, this time more passionately and intensely than before. You could feel the cold touch of his family ring against the soft skin of your cheeks, contrasting with the warmth of his palms.
The camera flashed and that single incredible moment was captured forever in a picture that would last for a long, long time, kept in scrapbooks and family photo albums.
"Oh, crap..." you grumbled after you pulled away the second time.
"What's wrong?" Draco asked, his voice hoarse due to the kiss.
"Now I'm going to have to do Ronald's homework for a week!"
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12tardis · 4 years ago
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Drunken Smiles (Newt Scamander x Reader)
Warnings: alcohol mentions, obnoxious Theseus AGAIN Requested: Yes! Anon requested drunk Newt! Cute silent moments where he gets distracted and drinks someone elses drink. I hope you like it anon! I’m sorry if this isn’t exactly what you meant. Pairing: Newt Scamander x Reader Summary: Your boyfriend Newt hasn’t gotten drunk in front of you for years after he embarrassed himself back during your Hogwarts days. He seems to have a strange habit involving you when he drinks a little too much. Features obnoxious older brother Theseus and even some teasing Leta. Also features the bully from ‘Love Language’.
A/N: Inspired by my favourite manager who kept referring to his girlfriend as his wife for years whenever he was drunk. They’re married now <3 I hope you like. Please send me more requests!
Words: 3,270 Taglist:  @moonkissk7​ @just-an-outstanding-auror​
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The music in the small jazz lounge was thrumming in your ears as you smiled back at your boyfriend adoringly, sipping on your drink as the two of you drifted closer together in the small booth. You had just finished up at one of his book signings and had knocked back a few drinks each as you waited for Theseus and Leta to join you shortly.
 “Oh hello,” you giggled when he scooted into the booth right next to you, wrapping his arm around your waist and pressing an affectionate smooch to your cheek, taking your hand in his free one and then pressing a series of kisses to your knuckles. You were pleasantly buzzed from the mulled mead you’d had so far but Newt was clearly a little more on the tipsy side as he was suddenly lavishing you with unabashed affection that was usually reserved for the privacy of your own home.
 “Hello, darling girl. My muse, my...my angel in disguise. Wait no not disguise because you’re clearly otherworldly”, he paused his rambling to hum to himself in thought and you giggled again, feeling your cheeks warm as you looked back at him.
 “Newton, what?” You chuckled, reaching up to card your fingers through his unruly locks, watching him frown as he tried to find the words he was trying to say. He pouted to himself when he came up short and you pressed a kiss to his cheek with a fond smile “it’s okay, I don’t expect you to be a romantic poet when you’re drunk too.”
 “I’m not drunk!” Newt huffed, looking back you in offence and huffing again to himself “I was just trying to tell my girlfriend how important she is to me”, he sighed, slumping back against the booth and you smiled softly at him, leaning in to brush your lips against his slowly and that’s how you knew he was a lot more tipsy than he let on. Because usually in public, Newt only returned short and sweet kisses but this time he slipped his arms around you and kissed you back slowly with a soft but happy sigh.
 And in your slightly buzzed state you too allowed yourself to lean more into the kiss, sitting back quickly when some other patrons accidentally brushed against you as they made their way through the rapidly filling club.
 You glanced down at Newt’s watch, straightening your dress out “they’ll be here soon. Let’s go get us some more drinks before the bar gets swamped?”, you tugged Newt to his feet, smiling as his arm wrapped around your waist again as he lead you towards the bar.
 Newt had refused to drink around you other than a few casual drinks after your first and last time getting drunk together had resulted in him embarrassing himself. And as he pulled you closer into his side when another gentleman smiled a little too warmly at you, you couldn’t help but remember that time in your seventh year.
                                              -     -     -     -     -     -
You and Newt had practically sprinted to The Three Broomsticks once you’d both finished your N.E.W.Ts exams, knocking back all the strongest drinks they had on offer in celebration. You were sitting, pressed up together in the corner of the pub laughing as you reminisced over some of your memories together when Newt suddenly wrapped his arm around your waist.
Physical affection was no stranger to your friendship. In fact, usually not a single conversation or interaction went by without you touching one another in some way but Newt usually only ever slung his arm around your waist when you were cold or in need of comfort, or in those instances when you would perch yourself in his lap and he did so to steady you.
 What you hadn’t realised was that Zachary Lindensbaum had stepped into the pub flanked by his buddies, prompting such a response from Newt. He was the very same douchebag that had asked you out on a date the previous year only to humiliate you in front of half the school when he loudly announced it was all a prank and Newt felt a surge of protectiveness when he spotted him arrive, remembering how upset you had been that time.
 Protectiveness as well as an undeniable flare of jealousy at the memories that cropped up of Zachary spending those few days wooing you with his smarmy pickup lines, half wilted roses and messy love letters- if you could even call them that.
 Newt had been so certain he had experienced his first real heart-break when he saw you smile shyly back at the Gryffindor beater the year before. But then only a week later he was the one to find you crying, beside yourself with humiliation and he felt utter disdain and contempt for the first time in his life.
 So when he saw that Zachary had spotted you and the way his eyes lit up as he made a bee line towards your table, Newt curled his arm even tighter around you. You stopped mid-way through your story when you felt Newt pulling you into him and you looked over at him, following his line of sight and swallowing thickly when you saw Zachary.
 You hadn’t spoken to the other male since that day and you had really hoped to keep it that way but now you straightened up in your seat, bracing yourself for whatever Zachary had to say this time. Your jaw dropped however when Newt held a hand up towards the other male “Nope. Absolutely not.”
 Zachary had already slipped onto the bench across from you when Newt spoke and he just stared back at him dumbly for a moment “I’m sorry what?” he frowned, his eyes flicking between you two but you were just as gobsmacked too.
 Newt simply shook his head, making a shooing motion at Zachary “Nope”, he repeated, popping the ‘p’ while his other hand began to soothe up and down along your side in an attempt to calm you.
 “Nope what, Scamander? I just sat down”, Zachary scoffed back at him, his temper rapidly rising causing you to press into Newt anxiously.
 “And you’re leaving now. You’re not sitting here, you’re not welcome. We don’t want to hear what you have to say. Off you go,” Newt countered firmly, fixing the male with a cold stare.
 Newt spoke so matter of factly that you couldn’t believe your ears and neither could Zachary apparently because he just gaped at Newt for another minute before he got up from his seat wordlessly and left.
 You watched until Zachary and his friends were long out of sight before you looked up at Newt, your head spinning from a mixture of alcohol and the sheer shock of Newt so confidently sending your harasser away like a complete badass.
 Newt smiled back down at you, promptly slipping back into his usual sweet demeanour as he tucked a stray piece of your hair behind your ear “I think we need more drinks don’t you?” he hummed, his confidence leaving you breathless.
 The night wore on and you were both soon completely sloshed, leaning on each other and the table for support as you both slurred through your words. You got up from the table clumsily, giggling at Newt’s equally as clumsy attempt to steady you as he looked up at you like a kicked puppy “Y/N where going?” he drawled, clutching your hand.
 “Bathroom. Be right back.”, you hiccupped and your words were considerably clearer than his but it took you much longer to form your sentences. You made your way to the bathroom, emerging a while later and freezing in your tracks, sobering up immediately when you saw Newt standing cornered by Zachary and two of his burly friends.
 “SHE IS SO FAR OUT OF YOUR LEAGUE IT’S A JOKE!” Newt shouted, moving right into Zachary’s personal space as other patrons began to crowd around, wanting to catch a peek at the drama unfolding.
 You stood frozen by the bathroom door, staring at Newt in shock and rising fear when you saw Zachary’s fists clenched in response, but your alcohol addled state wasn’t allowing your feet to cooperate with your brain. In your mind you were already at Newt’s side, pulling him back from impending harm but in reality you were standing there dumbfounded.
 “What and you think a freak like you is more her league?!”, Zachary shouted back and Newt didn’t even flinch as he shook his head.
 “No. No one is this god forsaken school is good enough for her! You’re a total idiot for throwing away your shot like you did! And a- a complete Neanderthal for hurting her like that!”
 Zachary didn’t even have a chance to form a retort because Newt was continuing to rant on about all the reasons why he had messed up.
 “You could have been with the most loyal, kind hearted, passionate, breathtaking woman to exist! The most incredible, adorable, and strong woman but instead you decided to be a cruel and blithering idiot!”
 You stared at Newt with your mouth agape, feeling your heart race and not just from the alcohol as you took in his words. Some of your peers were staring back at you too because they knew he was talking about you even though he hadn’t used your name. It was only ever you.
 “I wish I’d had half a mind to make your hair permanently purple!”, Newt shouted, and all the other students went silent in shock as Zachary grit his teeth. Zachary’s purple hair had been the talk of the school for several weeks, leaving the other boy humiliated everywhere he went.
 “I KNEW it was you that swapped out my shampoo!” Zachary shouted back at him, his fist colliding with Newt’s face not a second later in a sickening crunch. And your brain finally snapped into gear as you ran to Newt, shoving past Zachary and his friends to grasp his shoulders “Newt!”
 Newt gripped his face in pain as he stumbled back, growing enraged again when he heard one of Zachary’s friends sneer “all over some Hufflepuff bitch,” which drew a few disgusted gasps from the surrounding crowd.
 “YOU TAKE THAT BACK!”, Newt shouted, going to shove the guy that had insulted you but you grabbed two jugs of iced water from the bar and threw them over the group of boys before any more punches could be thrown.
 They all gasped collectively at the shock from the ice water drenching them and some of the bartenders took the chance to grab Zachary’s sidekicks, throwing them out of the pub while the maütre d’, Dottie, threw a mop and bucket and some towels at Newt and Zachary angrily.
 “Clean up your mess and piss off! And you lot, stop gawking like twits! Nothin’ to see here!” Dottie scowled, making sure the crowd dispersed before she turned to you, taking the empty jugs from your hands.
You immediately began to stutter, apologising profusely for the mess you’d caused but Dottie simply waved her hand at you dismissively. She was an plump, older woman who could be truly intimidating when she needed to be.
 “No harm done, blossom. Don’t think I’ve forgotten about you two helping me clean up the last time things got rowdy.” she smiled warmly, pushing you to sit down before she handed you a glass of water, seeing how tipsy and sleepy you were.
 You shot Zachary a cold glare when he shoved past Newt after cleaning up the area and once he was gone you began fussing over Newt and his split lip.
 You were so far gone you didn’t trust your ability to perform a healing charm on him so you let out a breath of relief when Dottie appeared with an ice pack that you gratefully took from her.
 “Oh Newt, you shouldn’t have done that,” you sighed, holding the ice pack up to his lip and gently brushing his hair back from his eyes, sighing when he looked back at you with wide doe eyes “he was being an ass!”
 You sighed again as you shook your head at him, feeling incredibly guilty for not stepping in sooner “I know but you went and got yourself hurt, Newt.”
 Newt looked back at you with a dazed and dreamy smile, taking your hand “anything for my wife,” he murmured and you looked up at Dottie when the woman cackled in response, clapping Newt in the shoulder.
 “Deary me, son. I think ya gettin’ ahead of yourself. There’s a couple steps in between ya know, girlfriend, fiancĂ©?”, she chuckled again when Newt shook his head, pointing a finger in your direction. “Nope. That’s my wife,” he said matter-of-factly, smiling back at you with pride.
 You were openly gawking at Newt now, your cheeks warm and your stomach flipping but you didn’t allow yourself to believe the adoring expression he wore. Instead you looked up at Dottie in alarm.
 “Oh my stars he’s concussed! I’ve gotta take him to the med bay!” you panicked, quickly stumbling to your feet while Newt continued to spout nonsense at you.
 But Dottie was quick to placate you, having one of her co-workers who was also a nurse come and check Newt over.
 Within half an hour the two of you were headed back to the castle hand in hand and Newt was mortified and made you promise that you would never discuss the events of the night again.
                                          -     -     -     -     -     -
 You couldn’t help but laugh as you reminisced on Newt’s drunk shenanigans, leaning into his side while he ordered a round of drinks for the pair of you and Theseus and Leta. He looked down at you, raising an eyebrow “are you laughing at me again?” He asked suspiciously, narrowing his eyes at you.
 You shook your head, leaning up on your toes to press a kiss to his cheek and before you could respond, Newt had knocked back the drink in front of him in one gulp.
In his tipsy state he had thought the drink was his own, completely failing to notice it was a different colour and served in a different glass to what he’d been drinking already.
 “Merlin that is NOT mulled mead!”, he gasped with wide eyes, his throat burning while the bartender stared back at him.
 “Hey! That’s my drink!”, a gentleman beside Newt complained just as the bartender shook his head in annoyance. You quickly intervened, paying for the drinks and a replacement for the disgruntled stranger beside you.
 Theseus and Leta appeared then, helping you to carry the drinks. “Newt, did I just see you shot a hogs tea?” Theseus asked incredulously, gripping his brother by the shoulder and you snapped your head up to look at Newt with wide eyes “Hogs tea!? He was already tipsy before!”
 Newt nodded, sitting down clumsily in the booth beside you while you hugged the couple in greeting.
The second you had pulled away from Leta, Newt wasted no time in tugging you into the booth beside him, wrapping his arms around your waist and hooking his chin over your shoulder.
 “Yes, definitely hogs tea”, Newt murmured, already beginning to slur his words. Leta and Theseus sat down across from you both, surprised to see Newt being so cuddly towards you. His affections for you had never been a secret but to see him so unreserved as he pressed a kiss to your shoulder and nuzzled at your neck was startling to the pair.
 “Newt, I don’t think I’ve ever seen you drunk,” Leta said as Theseus nodded quickly in agreement.
 “Even I’ve only seen it a handful of times. What about you Y/N?”, he asked curiously, trying not to laugh at how flustered you were getting as Newt just smiled down at you with a love struck smile.
 “Only once before. After our N.E.W.Ts”, you murmured looking back at your boyfriend while Leta snorted at the memory. She’d heard about the drama the following day.
 “ ‘Mnot drunk thank you very much”, Newt protested with an irritated scowl, holding a finger up to Theseus challengingly and you giggled as you took his hand in your own, effectively drawing his attention back to you. You watched him as his features smoothed out again and he was gazing back at you in awe once again.
 “My beautiful wife,” he murmured, raising your hand to his lips and your mouth dropped in response as you felt your cheeks flush warm.
 Theseus slapped his hand on the table excitedly, practically bouncing with joy because he knew Newt had been planning to propose for a few months now. “What did you finally-OW” , he frowned when Leta stomped on his foot under the table.
 She too was excited at the prospect but she was much quicker to notice the surprise on your face and the obvious lack of a ring on your hand. There was no way she was about to let her boyfriend spoil her best friends eventual proposal.
 Thankfully you were completely oblivious as usual, shaking your head at Theseus “no he’s just drunk. He did this exact same thing last time- except I thought he was concussed then,” you breathed out, looking back at your boyfriend in wonder.
 You stayed at the club for another hour or so, glad to catch up with Theseus and Leta even though you were very distracted by how handsy and cuddly Newt was being. Theseus of course found the whole situation to be hilarious and decided to start correcting his brother, grinning at how increasingly frustrated Newt was growing.
“Water for my wife!” Newt announced proudly, setting a glass in front of you and only spilling a bit of it as he returned to his spot beside you, slinging his arm around your waist.
 “Your girlfriend you mean,” Theseus corrected with a slight smirk when Leta shot him an exasperated look.
 “No. Wife.”
 “Girlfriend.”
 “Wife.”
 And even Leta was starting to smile now watching the brothers bicker while you just watched on with a bewildered smile.
 “Oh you mean, MY wife?”, Theseus questioned, mocking confusion as he reached for your hand, gesturing to himself.
 “No!”, Newt huffed, slapping Theseus’ hand away and curling his arm around you tighter and this time Leta grinned as she decided to tease her friend too, taking your hand in her own.
 “My wife?”, she smirked, pressing a loud smooch to the back of your hand making you giggle.
 “NO!” Newt gasped with wide eyes, looking so miserable that you quickly took pity on him, slipping your hand out of Leta’s and cupping his face in your hands.
 “Okay okay! Honey I think it’s time we got you home”, you smiled sweetly at him before you brushed your lips against his and Newt promptly relaxed again.
 You said your goodbyes to Theseus and Leta before you made your way back to your flat with Newt. You didn’t correct him once, allowing yourself to enjoy the illusion of being Mrs. Scamander like you so wished to be.
 And when Newt woke the following morning with a pounding headache you were beside him waiting with a light breakfast and a cup of tea ready for him.
 “Merlin, did I do anything embarrassing last night?” Newt groaned, setting his hand on your knee as he sat up gingerly.
 “Not at all my, love,” you smiled, passing him his tea and leaning in to press a kiss to his head “nothing at all.”
  Please send me requests!
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jewish-space-laser · 4 years ago
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ok i have an idea for a cbl blurb? could u do a blurb from harry’s pov from the night where he got drunk and how he felt when he saw yn and stuff? ik it already happened but i think seeing it from his viewpoint would be interesting!
Could be Lethal - Part Three (Harry’s POV)
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“And every time I’ve held a rose, It seems I only felt the thorns, And so it goes, and so it goes, And so will you soon I suppose...”
– And So It Goes, Billie Joel
HELLO EVERYONE! It’s been months since I’ve posted anything on here, but I randomly got the motivation to pick this up last week. I apologize in advance for my rusty writing skills! This ask has literally been sitting in my inbox for 10 months, so posting it actually feels quite cleansing. Anyway, here is a (long) blurb full of angst, angst, and you guessed it, angst! I hope you love Harry’s take of that night as much as I do. I love you all muchly, thank you for your ongoing love and support <3 xoxoxoxoxoxoxooox Tile
(3.8k word)
You and Harry were friends, with a capital ‘F’. Yeah, you’ve been sleeping in his bed for the past two months, and maybe your entire nervous system goes into hyperdrive when you’re in the same room, but that’s normal, right?
or
The one where you and Harry have an arrangement
 of the cuddling sort.
 See the CBL masterlist here!
WARNING: Detailed descriptions of heavy drinking
~~~
It was bullshit. It was all bullshit. 
Harry was miserable. He knew it, his friends knew it, his family knew it
 it seemed the only person who wasn’t picking up on his desperation was you. 
You were a complete enigma to him. Sometimes, you were the warmest, most open person he’d ever met, indulging him with interesting conversations, stupid jokes, and even the occassional existential discussion. It was always difficult for Harry to truly open up to a person, having been jaded time and time again by people who weren’t able to look past his famous exterior. 
That’s what makes it so much harder, he thinks. Knowing you properly, you knowing him properly. It made the moments where you were closed off harsher, colder, more difficult to read. 
Since you left his house two days prior, he had done just about anything he could to take his mind off of you. He loved thinking about you, but he also hated thinking about you. It was tortuous and circular and he just wanted a brief moment of emotional respite. 
No, he didn’t want respite, he needed it. 
So he watched all three Lord of the Rings movies in a row, tested out a new stir fry recipe, spent way too much money online shopping, and even scrolled through the Humane Society website in a moment of weakness. But none of it mattered, because even if he could distract himself for a moment, you were still there, lingering in the peripherals of his mind like a song stuck in his head. 
It was dizzying and mind-boggling, and Harry was at a loss for what to do. So when Sunday morning rolled around and it still felt like his lungs were being crushed into a ball, he started drinking. 
It was only 8:00AM, but he bypassed the coffee cabinet and went straight to the fridge, pulling out a chilled bottle of champagne. The pop of the cork was as loud as a gunshot, but Harry didn’t even flinch, hardly registering the sound of it hitting the floor across the room as he rushed the bottle to his lips. 
Bubbles fizzed past his tongue and dripped down his chin, sliding down his bare chest before puddling on the floor. He had to squeeze his eyes shut tightly at the burn of the carbonation, but each gulp sent pleasant tingles over his skin. 
For the first time in ages, his mind felt numb. He didn’t necessarily feel good, but he didn’t feel miserable anymore, and that’s what mattered. He could close his eyes without seeing your smile flash in his head, he could listen to music without immediately relating the lyrics to you, and after his second bottle of wine, he was even able to brew a cup of coffee without thinking of you. 
Okay, maybe he thought of you a little. 
At some point, he passed out on the couch, cartons of Vietnamese takeout sitting cold on his coffee table. When his eyes finally blinked open, the sun had already started to set.
“Fuck,” he muttered to himself. There was a familiar ache pulsing behind his eyes, and he groaned loudly into his empty house. It never used to feel empty, but now you’d come and gone, and it was too late. You’d left your mark on his house and his coffee and his heart
 so he drank more. 
There was no more wine, so he started in on his collection of hard liquor, expensive bottles lined on top of his cupboards. Normally they were reserved for when he had guests over, but this fell into the realm of desperation. His sunken eyes scanned the glass bottles before settling on the cheapest of them, an unopened Maker’s Mark. It would do. 
He was pouring a healthy sized glass of the whisky, and then suddenly he wasn’t. His heavy eyes blinked in confusion as he stared across the bar at the bartender, who was raising his eyebrows expectantly. 
“That’ll be thirty-five pounds, mate,” the bartender said, “got roped into buying the first round, eh?”
“Yeah,” Harry grunted, glancing over his shoulder to see Thomas and Jessie watching him from a booth. 
He doesn’t remember leaving his house, let alone coming to the pub with his friends. In fact, if he tried to think about it, his memory of the entire day felt fragmented, like pieces of a puzzle that didn’t quite fit together. 
In his mind, this was a success. A full day gone without thinking about you or talking to you or seeing you. The clock behind the bar read 00:43 in red neon numbers. He took one of the shots quickly, signing the bill and taking the remaining five back to his friends. 
“Harry mate, we told you we’re not getting pissed tonight,” Thomas groaned, “what’d you get six shots for?”
“What kind are they?” Jessie asked, wrinkling their nose. 
“I dunno,” Harry shrugged, setting the tray down directly in front of himself. His vision swayed to and fro, but he still managed to down another shot, disregarding the concerned look his friends shared. “It’s rum. If you don’t want any, that’s fine.”
“It’s a Sunday, mate,” Thomas reminded him gently.
“We’re at a pub, aren’t we?” Harry slurred. “Supposed to get drunk here.”
“You asked us to come here,” Jessie said slowly, “said you needed to talk to us about something.”
Harry blinked at them slowly, swaying slightly in his seat. He didn’t remember any of this. 
“Actually, he said he needed a drink,” Thomas corrected, “I didn’t realize he meant twenty drinks.”
Another shot burned down his throat, and then everything was cold. 
“Harry.”
His head was pounding. Every limb felt heavy. He couldn’t bear to open his eyes, already overwhelmed by the echo of Thomas’s voice reverberating off of the tile floors. 
“Harry.”
He knew that somebody was trying to get his attention, but he just couldn’t. The alcohol had done its job for most of the day, keeping his brain muddled down and diluted just to spare him the pain of remembering. But now, it backfired, trapping him inside his own head with no way out, with nothing to do but remember. He could hear people talking in the background, but couldn’t make out what they were saying. It was as if he was underwater, slipping further and further down with each painful clench of his heart.
He felt a hand press against his arm, and jerked away, causing his stomach to twist. He didn’t want to be here anymore, and he certainly didn’t want to be bothered. 
“G’way, Thomas,” he managed to grunt. 
“It’s me.”
Your voice was clear as crystal to him, but he knew it couldn’t be real. You had left him, after all.
The image of you driving away from his house was burned into his memory, playing over and over again in slow motion. If he thought hard enough, he could even remember the way your body had felt beneath his, whining and squirming and gasping, just like he’d always dreamed about. He could remember the sunken expression on your face the next morning, the heavy silence of the car ride to the coffee shop. He could remember how he’d hoped, so badly, that you’d finally talk about it, this unspoken connection that could no longer be denied. Most of all, he remembers the way his heart dropped when you told him that you didn’t remember any of it.
Another gentle brush, this time along his hairline, and he managed to open his eyes just a sliver. 
You looked amazing. Well, there were circles under your eyes, you were wearing your pajamas and slippers, and you were frowning in concern, but to Harry, you were the most beautiful thing. 
 “You’re here
 y’really here
.” he sighed. 
You were crouched in front of him, holding a plastic cup of water, and all he wanted to do was pull you into his chest. You looked sleepy and cosy, just like you always did when you stayed over. Before he could reach out to pull you close, you were putting the rim of the cup against his bottom lip.
He took it, grateful for the relief it provided his dry mouth. For the first time since he came to, he took in his surroundings. He was in a single stall bathroom, curled on the floor next to the toilet. The walls were an ugly pale yellow, while the floors were white, making the streaks of dirt and grime more noticeable than ever. Thomas was leaning against the sink across the room, watching you as you tried to get him to finish the cup. 
“Y’look so pretty, always look so good,” Harry slurred, “just wanna snuggle, like we always do.”
He loved the way your mouth dropped open. Everything about you was endearing, really. He watched as you twisted your head to say something to Thomas, water sloshing around in the cup when you nodded your head quickly. Thomas left immediately after, but Harry hardly even noticed. 
When you turned back around to face him, he felt blinded. Despite the dark circles under your eyes, they’re bright and they pierce through him just like always. He loves the color of your skin and the shape of your nose and the little crease that forms between your eyebrows when you’re anxious. He thinks he could probably paint you with his eyes closed. 
Warmth licked across his skin when you brushed your fingertips against his forehead, tucking a stray lock of hair back into place. Harry leaned into your touch, unwilling to let the moment pass too quickly. 
“Can you try taking a sip of water, H?” You tilted your head. “For me?”
He could have laughed, had he not been so nauseated. He would do anything for you normally, but he really did feel awful. “G’na make me sick,” he insisted, wrinkling his nose at the cup in your hand. Even though he could hardly focus, his eyes zeroed in on the faded X scrawled in sharpie on the back of your hand, a souvenir from your night out at TAVERN. He had a matching mark on his hand, and he dreaded the moment the ink would wash off fully. Just another thing forgotten.
He just wanted you.  
He hadn’t meant to say it out loud, but the look on your face told him that it had slipped out. There was no way he regretted it though, not with you right in front of him. Not in this state of mind. 
“It’s gonna make you feel better, and then we can go home,” you urged softly, scooting a tiny bit closer to him.
Home. When he thought of home, he thought about mornings in his house, sunlight filtering in through the blinds and leaving shadowed stripes across your skin. Home was the way you squinted your eyes tighter together right before waking up. Home was you at his kitchen table, going off at him about not doing his dishes. 
“Y’coming home w’me?” He managed to say. Your eyes softened.
“Only if you drink this whole cup,” you lifted it up to him once again, gingerly tilting his head up with a finger on his chin. Even though he felt like his stomach would combust if tried to swallow anything, he allowed you to help him drink some water. Some sloshed messily onto his shirt, but it felt sobering. You met his eyes for a moment, “is that good?”
“I’d do anything for you.”
If you asked him to drink water, he would drink water. He would drink an entire ocean of water. It was achingly clear to literally everybody but you. He could tattoo your name over his heart and you still wouldn’t see.
You gulped loudly, but didn’t say a word, simply prompting him to take another sip of water. He wished more than anything that you’d say something. Make some kind of facial expression. He just wanted a signal, a sign, that you felt anything towards him; disgust, affection, pity. 
He was sure you must pity him. 
Harry drank the rest of the water, cheeks burning as he asked you for a refill. He was still drunk, but the fog had cleared enough for him to sit up straight without feeling like he was going to hurl. He watched you refill the cup in the sink that looked like it hadn’t been cleaned in decades, but that was honestly the least of his concerns. 
“Y’must think I’m pathetic,” he grumbled, squeezing his eyes shut and tilting his head back against the wall. “Can’t lose you.”
“You haven’t lost me,” he heard you say quietly.
But it felt like he had. Because even though you were friends, it wouldn’t be the same if he couldn’t fall asleep to the sound of your soft exhales. It wouldn’t be the same if he couldn’t feel that rush of excitement when you sneakily texted him under the table on nights out. Having you at a distance could never be enough. 
“Harry
” you sighed, rubbing your eyes, “why did you drink so much tonight?”
If your obliviousness hadn’t been so devastating, he would have laughed. How could you sit here with him, look into his eyes, and not see that his heart was entirely in your hands? How could he explain anything to you if you hadn’t already seen it?
So he wouldn’t try. Not right now. 
He mustered up the strength to push up onto his knees, managing to stand up fully with your steady grip on his arms. He took one shaky step as his head spun, and felt your arms snake around his waist to keep him balanced. Without even thinking about it, he wrapped his arm over your shoulder, reveling in the feeling of having you so close as you helped him out of the toilet. 
You brought him to a stop in the main room by the bar, and he couldn’t help but bury his nose into the top of your head. You smelled just like you always did. It had only been a few nights, but your scent was already fading on his bedsheets. 
“Y’smell like lavender,” he hummed, squeezing your arm lightly, “s’like you’re tryin; t’torture me
. So pretty.”
It really was torture, having you hold onto him as you both walked out of the pub. You were distracting, with your warm skin and soft hands. Each step was difficult; his feet were heavy as anvils and he just wanted to curl up right here on the sidewalk. 
Just as he was considering plopping down on the pavement, he heard the familiar beep of your car opening. He closed his eyes once he was sat in the passenger seat, feeling you fuss over his seatbelt. He flinched slightly when you slid a cold water bottle between his knees.
Harry blinked, and then suddenly you were buckled in behind the steering wheel, poking his arm and peering at him with tired eyes. “Can you stay awake for me, H? Just till we get to your house, okay?”
“Y’coming to my house?”
You were so good to him, all the time. By the looks of your attire, you were ready to be in bed hours ago, yet here you were, patient as ever.
“Yes, I’m taking you home,” you said through a yawn. 
“Miss having you at my house,” Harry exhaled. He didn’t even know what he was saying really, just the same thoughts and memories circling through his mind like planets around the sun, all them centered on you. “My sheets don’t smell like you anymore.”
Suddenly, he felt hot all over. His trousers were too scratchy against his skin, his palms felt clammy, and the longer you stayed silent on the other side of the car, his stomach started turning. In an effort to cool off and calm down, he let his head fall against the window, the cool glass soothing his skin. 
Drunk or not, he was trying to tell you how he feels, he was constantly trying to tell you how he feels
 and you didn’t say a word. You never did. It was so frustrating that he found himself biting back tears. 
Finally, after what felt like hours, you cleared your throat. “You can’t
” your voice cracked, “you can’t say things like that, Harry. It hurts me when you say things like that.”
“I don’t wanna hurt you,” Harry managed to say. “But it’s the truth.”
He was so confused. How on earth could you be hurting when he was sitting here with his arms wide open? Was he so repulsive that the mere thought of being with him caused you pain, somehow?
He was too drunk for this. 
Luckily, you seemed to be on the wavelength. “Let’s just
 not talk,” you said, shoulders slumped. 
Harry was feeling awfully dejected himself. He’d spent the last few days trying to cope with his complicated feelings, and now he was back at square one. Every time he thought he knew where the two of you stood, you would say something vague and he would start all over. Your relationship was like a house of cards; delicate, fragile, and knocked to the ground with the slightest shift, the tiniest gust of wind. 
The headache started out small, but by the time you pulled your car into Harry’s driveway, he was feeling like he might keel over. Somehow, he was simultaneously drunk and hungover. If he was going to make it up the stairs to his room, he was going to need something in his stomach, and water that wasn’t from a pub bathroom.
It was humiliating enough that heïżœïżœïżœd needed you to help him from the car, but upon entering his house, he nearly kicked his shoe through the living room window, grumbling about toast. He knew he’d been less than impressive tonight, but perhaps this was what you needed -- seeing him at rock bottom -- to finally open up and have a real conversation about what you could be. 
When he woke up in the morning, he would be sober, and he would be ready. He would make you coffee like he always does, and maybe he’d even run out and pick up fresh pastries.
“Want some toast,” he said, though he was fairly certain he’d said it once already. 
You were standing in front of him, toes just inches apart, and it felt instinctive to place his hands on your waist and pull you in. The silk pajama top you were wearing was cool against his hands, but he could feel the heat of your skin underneath, the frantic thumping of your heart against your ribcage tickling his fingertips.
Your hands were on his shoulders to keep him steady, but he was suddenly feeling more sober than he had all night. All day, really. 
Harry slid his hands further behind you, locking together behind your back. Having you close felt incredible. It hadn’t even been three days since he last saw you, yet every atom in his body was craving your touch.
“You, um,” he felt your shaky whale against his collar bone, “you have to let go of me if you want me to make you toast.”
Letting go of you felt physically impossible, so instead, Harry dipped his head down and rested his forehead against yours. The anticipation was excruciating as he waited for you to do what you always did: sink into his arms, wrap yourself around him, soothe him to sleep with the weight of your head on his chest.
Fissures cracked through his heart when you pushed him back, taking a single step back that may as well have been a mile. Suddenly, the air all around him felt cold, the room felt darker, the silence felt louder. He took a deep breath in, but still felt like he was suffocating.
“Do you really not remember?”
He needed to know. He had done everything in his power to think about anything else, but had somehow ended up here, standing face to face with you. He wonders if this is how it was supposed to be, if throwing you together over and over again was the universe’s ultimate plan, if all of this misery would be worth it in the end. 
He’d experienced heartbreak before, but this was something else. And when you choked out, “Harry, please don’t make me say it,” in the smallest voice he’d ever heard you use, he knew that he could write millions of records about the pain of this moment, and still never do it justice.
“You remember, don’t you?”
All you did was nod your head once, but he suddenly felt drained. Maybe it was the full day of heavy, reckless drinking
 or maybe it was the realization that things really might not work out. He still wanted to try, though. Even though you’d left the other day, there were countless other times you had stayed. For months you’d been coming over in secret, coming out of your shell and showing him how amazing you really were. That had to count for something; there had to be a reason. 
Coffee. He would make coffee in the morning and the two of you would fix everything. 
“Should we head to bed? ‘S getting kind of late, y’must be exhausted.”
You really did look tired, your eyes rimmed with red from yawning over and over, back hunched and shoulders slumped. He was feeling knackered himself, and was more than ready for this night to be over.
“Actually
 I think I’m gonna head back home,” you gulped. Harry felt like he’d been slapped, but he couldn’t move. He couldn’t speak. It’s as if you’d turned to sand; there one moment and slipping through his fingers the next.
“You don’t want to stay?” Harry tried to keep his voice even, but even he could hear how it wavered. He clenched his jaw to keep from crying.
“I just
 have to go home,” you said, looking everywhere but at him. 
He waited for you to say something else, but instead watched as you hoisted your purse further up onto your shoulder and walked out the door. Shell shocked, he stood there frozen, even as your headlights disappeared down the street. 
A long breath blew past his lips as he finally moved to lock his front door, any hope of you walking back through it dashed by the way you’d walked out for a second time. 
Harry likely would have benefited from a glass of water and pain medication, but with a buzzing brain and a shattered heart, all he could manage was to pass out on the couch fully clothed, dreaming about what might have been if you had just stayed.  
~~~
As always, let me know what you think! I love talking to you <3 xoxoxoxox Tile
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