#cause of the uquiz i just took

[circuslollipop]

idc if both of these are from different wrong time periods this is how the lannister twins look in my head

[redzangoose]

little guys moment

[againtodreaming]

here y'all go, just a simple fun one this time around! take this quiz and tell me what kind of cat you are! (=^･ω･^=)

[stellisketches]

why? please explain the soldier, port, king in excruciating detail PLEASE

EDIT: ITS FINALLY DONE i'm so sorry this took me like six months I got really busy with school work and I wanted to make sure I wasn't half-assing this anyway thank you for asking please enjoy

For reference I will be quoting the “Poet Soldier King” test on uQuiz as I feel they summarize each role most succinctly.

"You wonder, sometimes, if anger is the only thing you can feel. Remember: love is passion too. You made your own rules and will follow them to death. You try and forget that there is only one rule, and that it is "FIGHT". You are tired of fighting. You try to forget that, too, and keep going. You dream of quiet. Your love is where you heal." -Soldier

It's a subtle element but Vylad’s entire character/existence is about enduring conflict. It's an easy thing to forget due to his calm demeanor, but Vylad has been fighting since the moment he was born (hell, even before). Fighting the ill-contrived gossip of being a bastard son, fighting to prove himself a genuine Ro’Meave, and fighting against Garte and Zane’s abuse over his childhood. It’s a subtler form of conflict, but it’s very interesting to imagine how he was able to put up with all of it (I’ve planned so many prequel fics about the Ro’Meaves you guys). Then there’s the whole shadowknight topic that really is indicative of itself. Vylad's whole arc was based upon leaving behind the violence of his past as a literal soldier within the Shadow Lord's army. Again it’s really easy to forget but this is someone who was revived to burn the world to the ground and slaughter any and every man, woman, and child that got in the way of it. He told Aphmau himself in season 2: “One good deed does not fix a thousand wrongs done. I'm not a good person, let's just leave it at that. Please.” We may not have seen it on screen, but who knows how long Vylad was traveling with Sasha and Gene. I doubt Phoenix Drop was the first village they targeted, and I doubt Gene or Sasha or even Zenix were ever like “oh yeah you can wait outside while we commit atrocities on this Lord and his family and burn the whole village to the ground.” Vylad has a very practical mindset (another trait indicative of a good soldier), and it wouldn’t surprise me if he was purposefully good at his job so it would land him more opportunities to get out of the nether now and again. He enacted violence well enough that he was trusted to be sent outside the nether to go fuck up the overworld. Vylad is a man thoroughly haunted by war and the violence he’s committed against others in a way his brothers just… aren't. Sure, Garroth knows fighting and violence as a means of protection and ensuring the safety of others, but he doesn’t know war. He’s never had someone he cared about die in his arms. He’s never seen a whole village burn to the ground and see innocent people slaughtered left and right. He’s never seen a child screaming at their dead mother to get up. He may use violence, but he was never a violent person. Zane, on the other hand, most definitely was, however, but he hardly ever enacted any of the violence himself. 90% of the time it was jurors or guards he’d given orders to. And while he was more than happy to get his hands dirty every once in a while, he never felt genuine consequence from it. 

Continuing on Vylad’s inner psyche, we see after he still keeps a very practical, soldier-like mindset out of the nether in company with Aph and Co: He gets annoyed at Aphmau when she puts off telling everyone about the Tuu’la invasion. He surveys Laurance from a distance and does not interfere even in danger because he’s aware of the long term effect of distrust it would cause him. Upon the chaos in Narhaka, he immediately goes to burn books that have important locations the enemy could use against them. This is actually one of my favorite scenes because of how subtly status-quo breaking it is. Tell me right now of any scene involving book burnings done by a guy the audience is supposed to root for. Vylad’s view of the world makes him incredibly pragmatic and able to calculate the win-loss ratio of his actions and let that decide whether or not he will go through with it.

Vylad may not have the typical surface-level look of the characters often put into the category, but if you really dive into his past, his mindset, and the way he views the world, he easily fits into the role of soldier; with the final line “Your love is where you heal” setting him on the path of redemption we see throughout the whole series.

"Loneliness. Strength. Joy. You are powerful, but struggle believing it. You think you're not enough. Here's the truth : you are. You sing songs and hope they carry faith, because you have run out of it, and yet you still throw your heart out to the world and hope it makes it through. You convince yourself that pain is art because at least then, you will always have something to create. You are tired of stumbling through life. You dream of a ground you can stand on. One day, you will dance. Your love is where you feel - without fear." -Poet

Now I admit for Zane it does require a more particular perspective to place him as poet, but I’ll start simple and slowly transition to red string and corkboard. Firstly, from the original song lyrics, “He will slay you with his tongue” applies in at least two different ways. The first being obvious: Zane is incredibly charismatic- you don’t just make it to High Priest without a certain degree of people skills included but not limited to negotiating, preaching, and being able to reason your way through any theological question a questioning sinner could ask you. It’s a shame we don’t see it put into use very often throughout the series, but I think his position gives enough testament to his people skills. The second way this line applied is a bit more literal and a bit more dark, which would be the sheer amount of people who were murdered not by his hands directly, but on mere orders. He can quite literally have people slain in just a few words to the right people. Moving to the more esoteric; the line “You are powerful, but struggle believing it. You think you're not enough.” seems like it be a hitch to his characterization, as it first invokes the idea of someone who lacks self-confidence, which is FAR from what we see Zane characterized as in the story. However I see this from the lense of artists becoming blind to the depth of their own skill. Zane is powerful, but it’s not enough for him. He’s become so accustomed to the level of influence he holds he’s become desensitized to it, like how you stop feeling the cold of the water once you stay in it long enough.The power he’s been swimming in his entire life no longer brings that vitalic shudder of control he craves. Thus he seeks power that goes beyond mortal influence to raw, unchanneled divinity, as that’s the only thing that he has ever been told is above him. He hungers the same as any artist— to be something greater than they already are.

“You convince yourself that pain is art because at least then, you will always have something to create.” The idea of creation draws back to Zane’s relationship with control and divinity. I think it's highly debatable as to whether or not Zane has actual “faith” in the divine (i.e, seeing them as gods he wishes to emulate or simply as extremely powerful beings minus the religious element), but in either case it again leads back to desire for more. (sidenote: Zane’s fatal flaw being lust is such a delicious piece of irony and I could make an essay of its own on it). Anyway, back to the point I was originally trying to make: Zane sows pain and destruction as a means of asserting his power/importance both to others and himself. The “pain” spoken of would normally belong to the poet themself— but this is no ordinary poet, and there is no specific indication where said pain emerges from. 

"Duty. Strength. Resignation. You were told to do things and you did them. The world is something that was put into your hands and that you must deal with - so you will. You have a rigid back and steady hands, either metaphorically or physically. Is it nature or nurture ? You don't know. You are tired of being steady. You dream of feeling alive. Not that you aren't, but, sometimes, it's hard to remember that there is a heart between your ribs. Your love is where you breathe." -King

God where do I start. “Duty. Strength. Resignation” It’s like someone just said ‘describe Garroth in three words’. Duty has been his entire life, wanted or not, which leads directly into resignation. “You were told to do things and you did them.The world is something that was put into your hands and that you must deal with - so you will.” He learned his history. He learned the politics. He followed the dogma. He believed in Irene and his father and the glory of O’Khasis and his divine duty to lord over its people. His people. He said it himself in episode 68 he wanted to be exactly like his father, and that he thought to be lord was an honor and a privilege. To him, the weight of the world has rested upon his shoulders for so long that he becomes accustomed to each additional hardship quickly and quietly, never kicking up a fuss about his growing stress and dissatisfaction, like a frog in a pool of water that is steadily increasing in temperature. He locks his festering disdain for glorification of leadership away from his father, his family, and the rest of the world because he cannot show that he is anything but the Atlas of duty he was born to be. 

Until, one day, he has enough. He saw what happens to his dear little brother, likely the only person he felt he could truly bond with, and despite everything he still dealt with it, for the sake of the people around him, but when his father commands him to marry a girl he has never met (likely while he is still processing his grief) in the name of ‘duty’, it is the straw that breaks the camel's back. He sees that everything he has worked towards is meaningless as he will never reach a point where his father will be satisfied with him. That his father will continue to take and take from him until there is nothing left but a soulless puppet that will continue to speak his words even after his reign has ended. Every burden he has carried, every grievance he has hidden, every struggle he’s overcome and the hard work he’s put into building himself a true heir of O’Khasis— it all amounts to nothing.

So he leaves. 

Now, let me ask you: what would you do if you were a runaway prince escaping the crushing weight of expectation? Take a bunch of money from your no-good dad? Buy a boat ticket and live a new life in luxury on the other side of the world? Never work a day again and dive head first into careless relaxation? Surely, you wouldn’t look twice at a dilapidated little village on the coast. Wouldn’t bother to stop by and lift a finger to help it. You're free, you have a whole life of sweet exemption to look forward to. You wouldn’t give it the time of day.

“You have a rigid back and steady hands, either metaphorically or physically. Is it nature or nurture?”

Garroth finds himself in Phoenix Drop— a rickety dead-end little town as far away from home as possible. He stays, and he helps. He keeps the village running, he helps the Lord wherever he can. He takes in the broken, starved boy he finds in the woods. He does whatever he can to improve the lives of the people around him. Why? He owes them nothing, he’s spent a lifetime crushed under the weight of people's expectations and he turns around just to find himself carrying the weight of more lives on his shoulders. He is doing everything he was taught and everything he ran away from. 

But this time it’s different. This time, he sees how he’s helping. There’s no more grating voice telling him none of the effort matters. He has a rigid back and steady hands, metaphorically and physically. For the first time in his life, he can see with his own two eyes that his effort is worth it. There isn’t doubt and lies and corruption floating in and out of his mind. Just the warm, honest smiles of the people he helps. He feels it and it is real. The question “Is it nature or nurture?” is genuine: Is Garroth helping these people out of the kindness of his heart or because it was what he was always told to do, and now that he is without the purpose he was assigned he’s leaning on something familiar? Personally, I think that’s for the audience to decide. I myself would say a mixture of both, leaning more so towards nature. But I digress. 

It’s better then, when he helps and can see that he is doing good, but of course, that peace is not to last him. With the Lord’s death and impending turmoil of Phoenix Drop, Garroth’s role in the village shifts drastically to closer resembling the role he ran away from. People are treating him with near as much kindness anymore, no. The most forgiving are losing faith and the least are blaming him. Blaming him for failing to meet their expectations. Now, as things are deteriorating, he has more than enough reason to leave. He gave it the good ol’ college try, and he failed. With the sentiments of the village becoming scarily familiar to that of his father, he should just say “fuck it” and head on off to that faraway land where no one will know his name.

But still, he doesn’t. We see him in Rebirth and how desperate he is to fix the village, to make it work. Even when everyone else is telling him to give up, he refuses. Even sinking, a captain stays on his ship. (Side note: it’s scenes like this that cause me to start tearing up people’s lawns whenever I see takes that label Garroth as having a “fear of responsibility”). And he is completely ready to either make things work or die trying, regardless of what stands in his way. 

‘You are tired of being steady. You dream of feeling alive. Not that you aren't, but, sometimes, it's hard to remember that there is a heart between your ribs.’

Aphmau wasn’t the first person he saved. Zenix had likely been around for at least a year beforehand. However Zenix was a hothead teenager in need of guidance, which simply made him become another responsibility Garroth set upon himself. Don’t get me wrong, he definitely cares for him, but their relationship is far different than the one he has with Aphmau. 

With Aphmau, he finally has someone who shares the burden. Not only that, but sharing it willingly and with a smile on her face. He’s not used to having a person who presents themselves as an equal sharer of responsibility. Much less, someone who is willing and wanting for him to put his burdens on her (At least, that’s how he sees it). He can’t remember the last time he truly allowed himself to be vulnerable with someone. All the desires he’s pushed down start to bubble back up again, and he starts to imagine things he’d long tried to do away with. He sees Aphmau as a strong leader, one whose idealism is a strength and not a weakness, and how she accomplishes things he never quite got around to doing. An admiration grows for her, yes, but that’s not what makes her different. The difference, he sees, is her vulnerability. How she allows herself to be vulnerable around him. How despite the brave face she puts on, she has just as much fear that she isn’t enough. And she tells him this, directly, because she trusts him. And all of a sudden he realizes that if she can be strong to the rest of the world, and yet still let him see her weakness, her softness, then maybe, just maybe

“Your love is where you breathe.”

He can take his armor off, too.

[fe-smashorpass]

Introduction! (Please Read)

Inspired by other smash or pass blogs, this one is about Fire Emblem characters!

My name is Mod Garn and I use she/her!

Will only be posting characters who are 18+ but since this is Fire Emblem not everyone has a canon age. Even if they do, a character's age can be called into question (here’s another post I made on this topic). TL;DR I'll be arbitrarily judging a character if they look old enough for this. If you think a character should or shouldn't be here, I am sorry.

I will be doing almost every character in the franchise, including from the mainline and spin-off games, one off generics, the cipher exclusives, and manga exclusives.

Also I am splitting up characters who are technically the same character but under different identities.

Characters that will be excluded are:

underage characters (as mentioned before)

characters without a decent (or any) picture of them

Characters who share the same portrait as each other since that will be redundant

Generic portraits for classes, so if a character uses a generic class portrait (ex the 10 elites from fe3h) they won't be included (the only exceptions are Abysskeeper and Gatekeeper)

I'll be posting 3 characters a day, alphabetically, at 12PM EST.

Also thank you to reddit user u/Just_Nefariousness55 for making this post compiling every character in the games. My life was made so much easier because of you.

Also I made this uquiz and I would appreciate it if you took it :)

FAQ under the cut (please read!)

Q. Why? A. Because I can

Q. What’s the age limit of the polls? A. I’d rather not have any underage people rebloging/commenting/liking on the smash or pass polls (for y’all’s safety)

Q. I don't care for the other things on this blog, what are the tags for the smashing or passing? A. #fe smash or pass and #fire emblem smash or pass are the tags used for the actual smash or pass polls, in case you don't care for the random bs I sometimes post on this blog

Q. Why are people smashing/passing X character? A. IDK!!! Maybe to piss people off. Maybe the character is not as hot as you think. Maybe something else. Baseline is… I don’t know!

Q. Can you post X character? A. No, as I've stated before, I post characters alphabetically and certain characters will be excluded due to a multitude of reasons (read above). If you're asking me if I were to smash or pass a certain character, please specify and I will answer.

Q. Can you add a “not attracted to character’s gender” option? A. No I don’t think it’s necessary to have, you can just press “pass” or not vote at all

Q. Why is fe2 Nuibaba your pfp? A. It funni

Q. IDK this character, can I still participate in the poll? A. Sure! You can decide whether to smash or pass just based on looks

Q. Can I explain the reason why I would/wouldn't smash? A. Yes cause I'm nosey

Q. What will happen once you’re finished with all the characters? A. I’ll do the generic portraits for classes and idk what will happen afterwards

Q. Are you a fan of Digimon? A. Yes :}

[nymphoutofwater]

hello I just took your tragedy quiz and naturally I'm in love with you now and also I Must ask for an update on most fun/interesting/best text response questions

hello, so glad you liked the quiz!! unfortunately I haven’t been able to keep up with all the text responses, cause uquiz is a mess to navigate and the quiz is getting a ridiculous amount of takers… but I’ll give some highlights from what I’ve seen!!!

most people who answer do so along the same lines. “ok” or “fuck you” or “no” in the “breathe” box. “me” or “idk” in the “who are you box. “disappear” in the final one (which I find *incredibly* ironic).

But!! there’s also been a lot of interesting discussion in the final box. a lot of people are making the argument that saying goodbye hurts more in the moment, but disappearing hurts more in the long run. I appreciate the thought!!

here’s one of my current favorite takes on it:

there have also been a few poetic answers to “who are you?” which I’ve enjoyed!

shout out to this one, it’s the only one I thought to screenshot:

I’d love to comb through the answers more and share the ones made of pure poetry that I’m sure are in there, but I just don’t have it in me, unfortunately. most people don’t even write anything, and there’s only so many answers that are exactly the same or nothing at all that I can read before giving up.

love love love receiving asks though! if anyone has any more comments, questions, or perhaps answers that they want to be easier to find, please send them my way <3

[immortally-aro]

i was just taking some uquizes cause i finished most of my homework and why not, and right now "unpopular opinion" uquizes are popular. so i took some cause why not. and in the 4 i took, 2 of them had aphobic statements. one saying aroace people aren't real (and if they are, are very rare) and the other one saying asexuals aren't real.

now, i decided to fully take these statements and when the quiz asked for a comment on the statement I commented. I explained that aspec people don't harm anyone, and that there's no point policing identity.

but it made me realize how prominent direct aphobia is. im very aware of societal aphobia and other shit like that, and i was online in 2016 so i remember the amount of aphobia then too. seeing these opinions again reminded me how far we have to go.

so i will keep educating people when i can. and i will keep living how i want. my existence might scare or disgust people and you know what? good for me.

[cringefails2close2thesun]

Um would you still love me if i wrote a renchanting uquiz result when martyns red life skin was leaked or

transcript under read more!

[TRANSCRIPT:

Imagine meeting someone for the first time, and you just click- laughter comes so easily its spilling out of you, you both ribb on each other like you've known each other for years and not just 3 days ago, and when he puts on the worst accent you've ever heard calling himself the king- you don't hesitate to kneel at his feet.

Imagine having a king that treats you like his equal, that listens to your advice, and would rather sacrifice himself rather than put you in harms way- even if you both know that you have more life than he does and if he dies hes out for good. And when the fool finally does die, you die too; within minutes of eachother actually- the last thing the world hears from you is you calling out his name, grief-stricken and angry that they took him from you.

Would you find each other in every universe cause you cant live without them? Even in a world where you know you cant repeat the past, you see him watching from a distance with your new alliance and go to stand by his side? When you see him in his tower through your spy glass, do you run as he sets his home ablaze? Do you set up secret meetings under the moonlight, swearing your loyalty to one another; his voice at the precipice of that oh-so-familiar horrible accent again?

Do you realize that no matter what alliances you may have, at the end of the game somehow its you two against the world?

And in a world where the other doesn't exist, do you feel their absence in your very bones?

(You wonder where they are sometimes. In moments of weakness, you pray to the gods that you don't believe in that he was able to get out)

END TRANSCRIPT]

[wizardofgore]

can you tell me about your wips? i took the oc quiz and now i'm curious about them.

Hey!! Sorry I was sitting on this for a sec trying to put together my answer but essentially I write around characters/settings/vibes and struggle to create plots and narratives but I’ll do my best to tell u about them.

The first story (characters from the quiz: nymeria, ophelia, hugo, sofia) always felt like a dark fantasy/political drama where I wanted the characters to be a classic rpg party exploring a world on the brink of revolution, and through them I wanted to create a fantasy world that satisfied me politically (by implementing the immortal science of Marxism-leninism and so on and so forth) but because of my recent interest in fear and hunger I also want to create more lore for the religion that some of the characters follow. I imagine the story will end with the party being split somehow, and I think the best way I can imagine developing the rest of it would be to think of it like a video game where u can explore things in a nonlinear way and learn about the world in small increments. I think my dnd character olivier exists in this canon as well, and could maybe be a late game antagonist and someone who’s lore is revealed slowly over time. The setting of the dungeon is really intriguing me right now too, and thinking of the dungeon as a living entity like a haunted house would be part of it too if I had them explore the dungeon? Idk this is all over the place but hopefully it gives some clarity 🙏🏻

The other story (annika and anna) is supposed to be an exploration of two different peoples responses to traumas and solitude, they find each other and form a relationship that’s simultaneously the most fulfilling each other has ever had but also “toxic” and codependent because neither of them know how to navigate relationships, thus leading to their demise. These two characters feel like 2 different sides of my own response to grief. Annika is the anger, the self-sabotage, the quest for vengeance, the hope that others will pay for the harm they have caused her. Anna is a retreat into the self, complete lack of self-esteem, imposter syndrome, and she has neurotically convinced herself that her hunger and iron deficiency are actually a result of her not being human. Annika both sympathizes and takes advantage of this, and Anna both uses and consoles Annika. I want their relationship to be really beautiful so I’m still building up the events that happen in their short time together hehe.

The third is the newest and least developed, and I actually just named the characters for the sake of the quiz lol. Myra and maeve are (also shockingly) are also symbolic of my different neuroticisms, this time about death/thinking of oneself as a ghost, seeing someone you love die and realizing you have to live. I see this story as a classic mystery but probably with some nonlinear storytelling…hope that makes sense lol

Thank you for asking, im really bad at explaining my thoughts which is why I usually only communicate in roundabout ways (hence uquiz lol)

[twig---verginix]

Hi <3 Are you excited about your spotify wrapped? Do you have a spare few hours and a deep desire to spend them thinking about song lyrics? Pick the most interesting lyric from each song and make yourself a handy dandy

~prompt list~

that will bring you lasting satisfaction without having to make a uquiz question that you imagine people will be annoyed by. I highly recommend it. I've been doing this for hours.

And I’ll forget about it when I wake up late and stupid, I tried to tell the Uber driver till he tried to hit it/I tried to tell myself because I've come this far along, carrying my zombie arm to the 15th-grade prom

We understand we've been given a new covenant, a real sharp one/and we spend our days and nights gaining new appreciation of its finer points

This was how Cyrus got sent to the school where they told him he'd never be famous/and this was why Jeff, in the letters he'd write to his friend, helped develop a plan to get even

I have two big hands and a heart pumping blood/and a 1967 Colt 45 with a busted safety catch

Break the lock on my own garden gate when I get home after dark/Sit looking up at the stars outside, like teeth in the mouth of a shark

We each have our guns drawn, but neither of us wants to shoot first/We could stay like this forever. We could stay like this and never leave

And you think that it gets better, just you wait until next week/You're keeping a dark secret (but you're talking in your sleep)

And I think of you when I put on your old clothes/We don't talk all that often, who ever does/But I'll visit you soon and sing you a tune/About finding a family somewhere in the ruin

Raskolnikov felt sick, but he couldn't say why/when he saw his face reflected in his victim's twinkling eye

When I tell you that I love you, don't test my love/Accept my love, don't test my love/'Cause maybe I don't love you all that much

She hopes I'm cursed forever to sleep on a twin size mattress/In somebody's attic or basement my whole life

You stayed up to see the sun/I couldn't wait that long

I'm gonna bribe the officials, I'm gonna kill all the judges/It's gonna take you people years to recover from all of the damage

Basically, the public never responded, you were so amazingly what nobody wanted/I held tight to every scrap that I took in, but it's like it all happened when nobody was looking!

Dawn breaks like a bull through the hall/Never should have called/ but my head's to the wall and I'm lonely

But if the shoe fits, then I won't try it on/You'll be walking out early, but the show must go on/No, I know that I'm wrong/but I love how you're on my side when I cross that line

And I park in an alley and I read through the postcards you continue to send/where, as indirectly as you can, you ask what I remember. I like these torture devices from my old best friend

Turn my headphones up real loud/I don't think I need them now 'cause you stop the noise

'Cause this is the part where I shut up and let you infest my brain/Wrap your arms around my cortex, dig you in and let you drain

Try to look a little older so I can go/down to the bar, there's someone waiting to take me home

I drove home in the California dusk/I could feel the alcohol inside of me hum/Pictured the look on my stepfather's face/Ready for the bad things to come

You must fix your heart/and you must build an altar where it swells/When the storm it gains and the sky it rains/Let it flood, let it flood, let it wash away

Maybe somewhere there's a someone waiting there with a smile/And maybe there'll be a place to stop and rest awhile/And maybe you weren't meant to be just a rolling stone/And there's a road to travel on that leads me back to home

I spent this year as a ghost and I'm not sure what I'm looking for/A voice on the phone that you rarely answer anymore

And I stood there like a businessman waiting for the train/and I got ready for the future to arrive.

I know how you feel, no secrets to reveal (nobody knows me at all)/Very late at night and in the morning light (nobody knows me at all)

I'm not Robert Frost, if I wrote a poem about the weather/ it would start in my car, digging out for an hour

They're gonna clean up your looks with all the lies in the books to make a citizen out of you/because they sleep with a gun and keep an eye on you, son, so they can watch all the things you do

Regrind the lens again, and again, and again, and again, but still the picture flips/Anyone here mentions Hotel California dies before the first line clears his lips

I can see you far away as you grow and change and I stay the same/but I, I'm just like you, I've got, got no name at all

Hey, space cadet, are you still floating around that rock that you spent/so much of your life trying to get away from? (and does it at least look different from up there?)

The nights are lovely, dark, and deep/but I'll appear when you're asleep/You'll wake up with a sudden hurt/mouth and nose all full of dirt

It feels like it takes forever. It's maybe five minutes on the screen/but the horns will swell and the strings will sound when that flipped quarter hits the ground

It reaches in and tears your flesh apart as ice cold hands rip into your heart/That's if you've still got one that's left inside that cave you call a chest

I found a letter that said, "I'm sorry that you were asleep when I wrote these words down."/You'd think I ought to be used to that by now

On your birthday, you woke up/The snow was on the ground/You opened books and peeked inside/They kissed you on your crown

You can't give me back what you've taken/but you can give me something that's almost as good

Maybe you should just drink a lot less coffee and never ever watch the ten o'clock news./Maybe you should kiss someone nice, or lick a rock, or both.

Can you hear me? Are you near me? Can we pretend to leave, and then we'll meet again/ when both our cars collide?

This dream isn't feeling sweet, we're reeling through the midnight streets/and I've never felt more alone, it feels so scary getting old

I hope I cut myself shaving tomorrow. I hope it bleeds all day long/Our friends say it's darkest before the sun rises; we're pretty sure they're all wrong

I awoke to trees passing by at the speed of 65/Took a while to realize where I had spent the night

I won't explain or say I'm sorry/I'm unashamed, I'm gonna show my scars

I could lie and say to you that this would soon be over/I could lie and say I knew where we'd be waking up tomorrow

"June, July, August," she said/They stared at the summer about to fade away

Nothin' bout the way that you were treated ever seemed especially alarming til now/so you tie up your hair and you smile like it's no big deal

A voice like your father's tells you nothing good's for free/Well, that may be, but you're walking home to me

I said more photographs may come to light/I said I'm sorry, and I'm seeking help

You sing the words but don't know what it means/ to be a joke, and look, another line without a hook

And I start laughing like a child, and I mark their faces one by one/Transfiguration's gonna come for me at last and I will burn hotter than the sun

[starredforlife]

hey i just wanted to say your uquiz about dualities made me so so so happy! i took it a couple of hours ago and ive been thinking about my result (beavis and butthead hehe) the whole time and smiling cause it was just NICE!!! and fun! its a wonderful combination of profound and Silly and i wanted you to know that. i hope you have a good day!

thank you for taking it!! i'm really happy you enjoyed it :^) hope you have a good day as well! <3

[chaosciara]

I posted 7,787 times in 2022

427 posts created (5%)

7,360 posts reblogged (95%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@freshpickle

@frenchsiren

@wizardpotions

@emmamountebank

@wickedangels

I tagged 2,522 of my posts in 2022

#ciara’s convos - 306 posts

#i bloody love artists - 196 posts

#ciara's convos - 119 posts

#love between fairy and devil - 115 posts

#ciara watches lbfd - 73 posts

#snek - 64 posts

#snoodle - 63 posts

#i bloody love fan artists - 59 posts

#the ocean and me - 50 posts

#ciara just says things - 45 posts

Longest Tag: 124 characters

#🌺🌸🌺🌸🌺🌸🌺🌸🌺🌸🌺🌸🌺🌸🌺🌸🌺🌸🌺🌸🌺🌸🌺🌸🌺🌸🌺🌸🌺🌸🌺🌸🌸🌺🌸🌺🌸🌺🌸🌺🌸🌺🌸🌺🌸🌺🌸🌺🌸🌺🌸🌺🌸🌺🌸🌺🌸🌺🌸🌺🌸🌺

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

hi okay I need more people to know this because for……….reasons (my thumb gets tired even though I’m trying to be so brave about it)

if you use the mobile app a lot and you post fanfic or really long headcanon lists or literally whatever and it’s too much effort for you to go onto desk top and add the “keep reading” tab so you just don’t do it even if you want to, then here’s the mobile version:

If you type “ :readmore: ” (the stuff within the quotation marks but not the quotation marks) and then press enter it will add a “keep reading” line break

colon (:) no space, the word ���readmore”, no space, another colon (:), enter

and when you post it will post as a normal “keep reading”

mobile users <3 please use this feature <3

genuinely you do you if you know about this and just don’t like the keep reading but if you didn’t know, now you know!

165 notes - Posted March 14, 2022

#4

hello mi cielos! I am back with the first uquiz of the new year squeee

go on a picnic with me and I’ll tell you what “thing that humans do that make me believe we’re magic” you are!

CW: alcohol mention, food (as this is a picnic, there are three questions where I ask you to choose food)

it took me an embarrassing amount of time to finish this but listen okay in my defence finding the exact right pics always takes my full attention and about 16 hours of my day! fully worth it!

as always there’s 10 q’s, poetry (hah I snuck it in there), clothes, and delicious food!

enjoy and let me know what you get in the tags <3

175 notes - Posted January 7, 2022

#3

the new bears in trees song is soooooo driving down the highway on a saturday afternoon and getting ready with your friends for a day at a garden market and screaming in your bedroom at 2am and the intro scene to the main character in a coming of age movie circa 2004 and also for having a concert in your shower

213 notes - Posted October 9, 2022

#2

how to "get shit done": uni work addition

hi loveliest people so this is a sort of guide to how i get through uni work without going completely insane (make no mistake there is still some insanity present). I hope you find it helpful, or at least entertaining,

(disclaimer cause this is the internet: these work for me, they may not work for you)

table of contents:

a. date it

b. set reminders

c. how to stay on top of it

d. how to get on top of it if you aren't already

e. learn when your brain needs a break

f. uni is a full time job, treat it as such

A. date it

okay the first thing i do at the beginning of every semester is put uni dates in my calendar.

Term dates: when your term starts, when it ends, and your holidays. this is not just for information purposes but also so you have something to look forward to. additionally, it helps later on when you have to plan out assignment and test dates.

Assignment/ test dates: scour through the course outlines of all your courses and put every single date into your calendar. every assignment, every test, anything you have to submit goes in. that includes things like "weekly quizzes". make it a recurring date and chuck it in there.

B. set reminders

so i usually do this in my calendar but if you have a reminders app, or prefer other ways to set reminders then use that.

these reminders are not to make you feel bad for not doing work, it's to hold you responsible for your work. if you know you spiral at the idea of seeing a reminder when you haven't done work, this strategy may not work for you. don't give up, something will work. keep trying and have patience with yourself

if you know something is approaching it's easier to plan your life and your tasks around it. if you never know how long you have or you're always scrambling to figure out when something is due your mind is so focused on the dates it has no time for the work

Assignment reminders:

2 weeks before // 1 week before // 3 days before // 1 day before // 10 minutes before // on time of event

Test reminders:

1 week before // 3 days before // 1 day before // 1 hour before // on time of event

I know this may be excessive but if you're someone like me who constantly forgets things, it is very helpful to keep yourself on track

okay trust me you got this! i promise it's not as bad as it looks. right onto readings and assignments.

C. how to stay on top of it

do one reading per course per day: this is non-negotiable. trust me it is the easiest way to get through readings for a week.

if you have four courses of five readings each you will end up doing four readings a day from Monday to Friday. it is workable and you can do it. uni is fucking difficult and everyone has a story about why they're there but i promise you if you're there, the selection processes decided you were capable enough to handle it. and you are. if you can, start a week earlier so you're a little ahead otherwise it's totally okay.

2. start research for assignments 2 weeks before it is due. this will give you time and space to sort through what is relevant, useful, or should be discarded.

i have a folder for each assignment where all my research goes. within this folder there are three other folders: a. done and dusted b. too long/ not relevant c. could be helpful if i cared enough

and as i go through each paper/article/etc. i sort it into one of the three folders

See the full post

365 notes - Posted May 30, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

hi tumblr i made another uquiz. i've lost track of how many i've made at this point hehehe

anyway it's seven q's, no celebrities, and descriptive results. there's of course poetry, some clothes, and general fun things. anyway take it and let me know what you get in the tags.

it is worth mentioning here: i'm gonna ask that if you do not like men (as in you think negatively of them), do not take this quiz. you will most likely not be happy with it. pertaining to results: there are no descriptions of physical appearance, additionally, all of them apply to trans-men as well. i will eat you if you're transphobic on my quiz.

okay i love you byeeee

535 notes - Posted April 22, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

lmaooooo it’s been a year indeed <3 mwah! I love you all thanks for being my tumblr humans :) I’m here again next year, cause I can never leave this brain rot

[majortomyourcurcuitsdead]

sashaaaaa HI how about...

6, 10, 21, 39, AND 40 OF COURSE

HII CHRISSIEE OK I did it, that’s gonna be long but here you goo

6. What do you use to keep your place when you’re reading a book?

HMM WELL if it’s meant here what object do I use to mark a page where I stopped reading, then most often it’s a paper bookmark. Either one of those which I got in one Paris museum/gallery this year which I REALLY loved visiting, or some simpler ones which are usually given together with a book purchases at stores. I love the former ones so much, they’re very neat; they are basically fragments of works which I loved seeing irl, and I like matching them with the books where I use them. I also recalled about one plastic holographic bookmark with nebulas which I had a while ago and which was VERY neat, but I think it’s somewhere in my books which are either in storage, or in a Kyiv flat where I still haven’t returned to since my family left it after an invasion

10. What’s your favorite kind of uquiz question? (Lyric, color, aesthetic, etc)

SJJSJS This one is tough cause I don’t think I remember now all which I’ve seen bUt honestly all of the mentioned above actually seem good to me shsjjsjsj

21. What’s your favorite period in art history, your favorite famous work and/or your favorite style of art? If you don’t know any that’s ok!

Oohhoh WEll I absolutely adore works by Alphonse Mucha, also William Morrisʼs prints. And I like different elements of art nouveau and art deco, some Renaissance elements in architecture too.. Some brutalist architecture is interesting to me as well; so honestly I love a lot of different bits and pieces from different time periods and cultures. I also really like some of the classicism paintings, OH and dutch floral still-life paintings I’m obsessed with them. I love some of Andy Warhol’s prints too, especially some of his traced drawings and works with a smaller color palette. I looove antique statues, I always want to draw them lol; omg Gustav Dore’s illustrations are gorgeous. I love collages a LoT too, especially those from the times when they were just starting to become a thing. I like vintage concert and some movie posters a lot too. It’s a lot truly, I’m pretty sure I forgot about something here ahhhah

39. What was the best part of your day today?

Well I started writing the response to this yesterday so I will just continue the trend sjsjjks

There were two best parts for me yesterday; the first one was when I was sitting together with my family while we were waiting for our orders, and I thought that it’s actually the first time that we are all (parents and my sister) are reunited after being separated since we left Kyiv in February 2022; dad can’t leave the country while the stupid war is still ongoing. I visited him separately last year, and so did my sister this year, but yes it’s actually the first time that we are all actually together since that time; and even though because of my parents’ divorce it’s a somewhat different, it’s still a very nice feeling. When we don’t fight snsnjsjsjsnsj These are the people I grew up with, it’s something that’s definitely a huge part of who I am today too

The second moment was when I came home after finding a pair of really nice trousers; the thing is, there’s one factory here which makes clothes for different clients worldwide. And sometimes, when certain details in some items aren’t done as they should have been done, according to client’s request (like, for instance a different type of a thread used for stitching), they are just sold in a store by a factory. So as I’ve mentioned I’ve found a pair of dark brown wide trousers yesterday and a dark blue shirt; SO when I came home, I took a closer look at the trousers and.. buttons on them had a brand name which definitely doesn’t sell their trousers for 15 euros sO that made me happy sjsjsjsjjs I do think that the trousers turned out to be of that brand, I think it’s the zipper which originally was supposed to be different

40. What’s your favorite kind of tree?

OH since I was a kid I LOVED trees which I can climb and where I can sit. I remember having a soft spot for willows; they can be climbed easily and also their long supple branches are therapeutic to look at or to touch. I also like huge old trees with big strong low-hanging branches where, yes, you can sit. Also, I love big fruit trees under which you can sit in a shade in summers. OH I almost forgot about blooming trees, sakuras especially. Like please tell me how can you not like them

[arlecchno]

that . dream sounds disturbing :D for some reason nowadays ive started to get more disturbing dreams as well ? they cant be described as nightmares because well i wasnt exactly scared ?? by them but they were ,,,, yk . disturbing . idk maybe im too desensitized to things my brain just either emotionally damages me or is like HOW DO YOU LIKE THAT [ throws random disturbing thing / content ] in my “nightmares” sometimes -

NOT THE LONELINESS 😭😭 i relate except im may or may not be legitimately lonely lmfao . a lot of those frickin popular uquiz quizzes call me out for it and im like “🤠⁉️”

lmao haitham is picking up cynos humor ?? not clickbait real ???? memes aside thanks for more portrayal validation i love rping alhaitham ( esp with kavehs ) theyre so fun - oh yeah i also have this

ngl since i have an alhaitham pfp on discord , i was kinda reading my messages in his voice cuz i was slandering language LMAO ( imagine alhaitham pronouncing “balogna” the way its spelled . made me giggle ngl )

im pretty sure aster has been my oc for almost a year now ( I DID NOT REALIZE IT WAS THAT LONG BEFORE GODDAMN - ) so they have . an unholy amount of lore at the moment . i rlly need to modify the lore though because me and my friend ( we both made genshin ocs and theyre like partner ocs ) made our ocs before the release of sumeru where we got more information about irminsul and the leylines — which was vvvvvv important for my friends ocs lore — so now a lot of our stuff is either minorly outdated or some of our lore would just make a lot more sense done a different way 😭😭

even tho asters forever home ( well , as long as dilucs around ig ) is dawn winery , they travel teyvat a lot , which ties into their original name :D they wander the world too lmao ( its totally not an excuse to make them friends with all the character i like wdym hahahahahahahhaha ) . NGL THEY PROBABLY ALL MET AT THE TAVERN - whenever asters in mond ( a lot of the time bc obviously their house is there ) they work at angels share and like aster would walk into the tavern for the first time for like . a drink . dunno what kind of drink but then they just SEE this random ass kid from THEIR FALLEN ASS NATION and go “WTF” and promptly find out he is a fucking dumdum stoopid head and then regret ever coming to this place /j at the beginning kaeya and aster probably did argue at the bar a lot , these two khaenriahns WILL cause diluc to lose his sanity but its okay because then they can all cuddle by the fireplace when theyve all agreed that theyre okay with eachother ( they love eachother /p theyre just all in denial . ) . overall ragbros + aster relationship is just pure chaotic fluff and angst - sometimes they go out to murk all the fatui outside in mondstadt ! fun !! and oh god i typed WAY TOO MUCH ON THIS LMFAO

THE VOID BRICK WALL LMAO ah yes such a beauty is the unknown of the brick wall , it contains all the vastness of the universe in one block and you may observe every galaxy in its grain . also NOT THE TREE CRASH 😨

WHEKJDKDND YEAH I NEED A THOMA ROOMIE IF I EVER DECIDE ITD BE OKAY TO MOVE OUT IN THE FAR FUTURE BECAUSE I DONT THINK ID HAVE THE MENTAL ENERGY TO CLEAN THE PLACE ONCE A WEEK - and if i didnt id probably go crazy because i cant stand the feeling of dirt or sand on floors ….. bleh .

I ALWAYS STRUGGLE NO MATTER WHAT NATION LIKE . THERE WAS AN OCULI NEAR DAWN WINERY THAT I ALWAYS SAW THE DUMBASS SPARKLE TO ON THE MAP AND THEN IT TURNS OUT I NEED TO FLY A L L T H E W A Y UP SOMEWHERE TO GET IT LIKE . ARE . YOU . KIDDING . ME - it took me one whole year to figure out how to get that oculi . maybe im just stupid

omg you can NEVER mention dragonspine / winter patches around me im . IMPOSTER ALBEDO AND FELLFLOWER . they make me insane . i fucking USHXISJDIEIHDHSHAHAAAAAAAAA albedo / rhinedottir lore . alchemy in genshin impact lore . i am so . i will go feral the next time dorian / rubedo ( impostorbedo ) appears in story , wether it be event or not im . im insane thats what i am ………… hahaha …… 🤠

sometimes i forget people farm friendship exp .. im a super duper lazy player who absolutely despises grinding with my entire soul ( im the definition of “lore player” /hj ) i almost never switch out my team unless for fighting elemental bosses or enemies lmao -

DUDE MY CLASSES HAVE BEEN ACTUALLY SCREWING ME OVER WITH PROJECTS RN IM LOSING MY SANITY /nsrs im suffering so much . im losing so much precious sleep …… starts sobbing uncontrollably

i really like milk and white choccy too lmao - probs bc i just cant rlly handle bitter things but OH WELL ! my absolute favorite kind of chocolate is like any kind with strawberries / strawberry flavor in them , recently one of my friends shared some valentines chocolates she got from her boyfriend with our friend group and i gotta say that strawberry chocolate they had in there was ABSOLUTELY SCRUMPDIDDILYUMPTIOUS . it had pieces of dried strawberry too it was just . MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM

DUDE where i live we have these things called mochi donuts and theyre so good ( ngl you can probably guess where im from just from googling mochi donuts lmao - ) regular donuts r yumyum good but mochi donuts are so satisfying to consume LMAO - but man i havent had a cinnoroll in AGES .. i think im just a pastry enjoyer in general lmao , strawberry , apple , and guava pastries are my life .

tbh i dont think any reply would ever be too long for me to read , like you could probably write me a 3 page essay as a reply and id sure as hell read it LMAO i ramble a lot too so that just makes the both of us 😋

HEIDJEKJD favorite song questions are so hard , right now id have to say either undercover martyn - two door cinema club if you just wanted my music taste im gonna list a bunch of artists now because i am a free advertising machine when i like things : owl city , the neighbourhood , chase petra , lovejoy , everybodys worried about owen , and uhhh everything from the epic: the musical sagas

ZE QUESTION ! whats your favorite like ambient sound ( city noises , water , leaves , etc etc ) and why :0

wOOO SATURN EMOJI 🪐🪐🪐🪐 I LOVE SPACE !! CYA NEXT TIME 💫💫

- jellyfish ( or alex idk lol )

oh my god HI AGAIN ALEX i'm sorry that i wasn't able to reply to this sooner 💔💔 my inbox has been wonky for some reason and it finally worked today (thank god), i hope this won't happen again 😔🤞 i miss talking with you so here's a really long reply hehe hope you don't mind!

i've had my fair share of disturbing dreams lmao, and i've also heard that if you get those kinds of dreams then it means you're dying early??? i don't really believe in superstitions though so i'm not exactly worried about it LOL

your alhaitham rps are hella funny LMFAO i always think of alhaitham of someone who'd slander a lot of things especially when it comes to languages (since he canonically speaks 20 languages), i also see him as someone who'd mispronounce words or pronounce words as exactly what they're written (like you said) and say it with such a straight face 😭 i feel like if you ever tried explaining it to him he'd be like "what do you mean this is pronounced as baloney? why is it even spelled as bologna if you're going to pronounce it so wrongly? what has this system become?" and i'm just going to be in the corner laughing my ass off at how blunt and unintentionally funny this man is

aster lore is back again!!!!! seeing you mention that aster was created before sumeru and how it's already been a year since their existence made me realize how long sumeru has been out for,, sooner or later we'll be getting fontaine in no time 😵 but back to aster! it always interests me how you have this whole background story of aster which is HELLA cool and stuff and how you keep up with the genshin lore too! i think it's such a nice touch for them to be related with the ragbros too— i can just see their silly little arguments and silly little moments they have together. i'm also sure as hell the moment aster sees the khaenriah eyes (well,, eye... to be specific) in kaeya they'd be like "oh hell no." too SJDJKJS it's just so funny thinking of the many scenarios of their first encounter could play out

oh trust me, i hate cleaning my room. if i ever have a roommate one day, i am praying to the lord that they're the most strictest person on earth so that they can make me move my ass around 😔 i'm just not the person who has the energy to do all that often

don't get me started. the oculis in mondstadt are actual hell. like i'm literally not kidding. how can they call it the nation of freedom when i have no freedom trying to get all those oculis when i was in such a low ar? /j

jokes aside the locations of those oculis in mondstadt were so... brutal. i remember using those oculi compass things and the locations they showed at stormterror's lair were so????? some of them were up at the sky and my low ar ass was so confused on how to get up there,, i also remember there was this one that was hidden in like a pillar and i actually had to get my ass up the highest hill there to fly down into that pillar because somehow they won't let me climb the pillar up... those were truly my darkest times lmfao

WINTER PATCHES!!!!! i really miss them haha i was so excited during the snowman event back then and i made a bunch of cute snowmans and taking pics of them with kazuha. hope hyv bring back the winter patches ASAP ‼️‼️ WE NEED MORE ALBEDO LORE ‼️‼️ also idk if you have done the windblume story event but just in case i'm still adding a spoiler alert;;

i'm guessing we got some rhinedottir lore? well it was only mentioned that she's apart of the hexenzirkel and she called herself a mother to albedo (despite the many things she's done that would say otherwise lmao). but fetus bedo in the cutscene is so cute hsjdjdjjs and it basically implied that his hair wasn't tied like that but instead he was created with that hair style 😭 bros really just magnificent without even trying

i'm so very interested with rhinedottir/albedo/durin/dorian lore like i just know that there's more to what we know currently.... but we probably won't be getting much anytime soon considering how deep rhinedottir's lore is sobs

LMAO i get what you're saying with being a lazy player,, i myself have been detaching myself off from genshin impact recently and it's quite relaxing‼️ i don't panic that i missed out on daily's anymore and i hope it continues that way 😭 i log in once in a while to do the events and disappear again for the next week

ahhhh the thought of school projects and assignments makes me squirm kwdjdjdj my break basically ended and i start school on monday so hahaha.... i'm back to hell again </3 so not ready for the heavy workload . hope you're getting enough rest!!! school is always so hectic hhhhh hope you're managing well

dried strawberries in strawberry chocolates????? SIGN ME TF UP(!!!!!!!! i love anything related with strawberries they're literally the best. thing. to ever. EXIST! mochi donuts sound so good looking at the pictures on google made me want to just . chomp them following the shapes one by one. donuts are absolutely scrumptious.

guava pastries?? :0 never heard of them but i'd definitely try them if i could ever get my hands on them, any pastry MUST be tried out by me‼️‼️‼️‼️ *evil laughing intensifies*

glad that i have someone to ramble stuff with!!! at least i won't suffer by keeping all this excitement to myself while rambling stuff on this blog ☝️

just listened to undercover martyn!!! i think it's kinda stuck in me now LMAO the sick beats are getting to me,,, and the beats lowkey remind me of remember when by wallows which is one of my favourite songs by the band!!!

OMG OWL CITY?? HAHA this is truly ironic because i used to love his wreck it ralph song when the movie came out!! this gave me so much nostalgia and kinda made me want to watch the movie again LOL 😭😭 overall your music taste is so>>>> you made me discover new artists like chase petra and lovejoy!!! i'm currently in love with beabadobee shdjdh some of my favourite songs from her currently are you lie all the time and dance with me 😋🤞

oh this question is interesting— i pretty much love oceans the most, if anything. the sound of waves and the chilly wind gives me so much comfort for some reason, and somehow the smell of saltwater never bothered me,, despite my dislike towards salt in general LMAO.

other than that, i think this might sound weird . but i kind of like the sound of the hustle and bustle of flea markets too. they can be kind of overwhelming sometimes because of screaming children and whatnot- but for some reason i enjoy listening to people talking with each other whilst buying stuff sjsklk very odd but it's interesting to see what other people are up to. it's so very fascinating to see the human life evolve and for me that's comforting somehow 😵‍💫

a question for you!!!! what's your favourite season and why :D

i better not get ahead of myself with my rambling and end this off here. hopefully my inbox won't shut down again like last time!! i was so upset that i couldn't reply to your ask and ended up replying this really late 💔 thrilled to see your reply soon!!! have a nice day alex 🪐🪐🪐🪐 (YES SATURN EMOJIS WOO!!!)

[macbooth]

HELLO it is me the guy from the uquiz I learned my lines then took a break to stalk your blog again so I will clarify now: YES I am playing Falstaff right now & I think he talks too much because Im petty about memorizing all that <3 (also youre so real for making uquizzes instead of learning lines ... just like me fr)

you are the most relatable person out there fr cause the response of wondering why characters wont shut the fuck up is EXACTLY how i was when playing both nick bottom and jaques asyoulikeit.

the experience of playing characters that talk so so much is rage.

also you might appreciate this. the author of the book im hate reading right now thinks that falstaff is one of the two smartest characters in all of shakespeare canon and i and everyone ive shared that with have found that funny as fuck. just wanted to share that fact.

[direwombat]

That anon again. Thank you for listening to my rambling. And if it matters any, Joseph gets plenty of chances to Suffer during my dep's canon. Because we're (plural because this is all from an RP verse my best friend and I have where she plays Joseph and a 'John fucker' GFH while I play my dep and John) bitches like that and can't let the Seed boys get away with being the worst without suffering for it. (1/?)

A major theme of Joe and Dep's relationship is 'be careful what you wish for' since he spends a good early portion of things wanting to change her to fit his whims (for her 'own good' of course), but oops, he gets attached to who she is but by the time he realizes it, his actions are already responsible for her having begun to change for the worse. Play stupid games, win stupid prizes, Joseph. Now suffer. And I'm rambling again, but I had another question to ask. Two actually.

First: how did you first get comfortable with sharing Syb with the rest of tumblr? I ask because part of me is tempted to do this with my Dep, but the other part of me is scared of being perceived and judged for my dep, my interpretations of characters, etc. Two: With Augustine becoming Faith, did Joseph specifically pull this to punish Syb? Because I'm getting big 'you took my family member, now I take yours' vibes. And it sounds about right and petty and fucked up enough for Joe. (3/3)

f;lakdjfaldfkj that's TOTALLY FAIR i sure as hell don't let jacob off easy either fal;dfjkadf

and OOF well...to answer question 1: i've been shouting about my ocs into the void of the internet for the past several years (got started in the dragon age fandom, moved to the general dnd fandom, and ended up here) having friends already on tumblr/in the fandom space to share ideas and bounce off of certainly helps. it's for sure scary!, but tbh? the more you talk about them the more curious people will get. at least that's been my experience. and then of course, engaging with other people who have their own ocs, rb-ing their art/fic/sending asks for ask games and prompt lists are a great way to kind of find your place in the fandom/community and make friends! And to address your fear of being judged for your dep/interpretations of characters, i'll just say this: fandom would be boring if everyone had the exact same interpretation of the characters and it's ok to disagree with an interpretation as long as you're not a dick about it, yk? And, just like people irl, everyone's deputy is different and adds to the fandom!

my advice: do whatever you feel most comfortable doing. make your characters in picrews and do those uquizes! I normally open tag, so if you see one from me that you like! tag me! this includes wip wednesdays/whenevers too if you ever feel brave enough to share any writing you have! BUT MOST IMPORTANTLY, you are your oc's number one fan! if (god forbid, and i've never seen this happen personally) someone doesn't like them and has the gall, the sheer audacity to say that to your face? block them. have fun with your oc is what i'm getting at. they're your little barbie/bratz/whatever doll that inspires the most nostalgia for you. we're all just playing little games, telling little stories and dressing up our personal blorbos however we want. :)

as for question 2:

ahh.. poor sweet Augustine. So, Augustine is a park ranger who was on duty at the Whitetails Ranger Station the night of the Reaping and was injured in a pretty nasty fall. One of his coworkers (another oc, Shaw) is one of Jacob's Chosen (who spent a lot of time undercover as a civilian), and after hearing that the Deputy escaped, he essentially lets Jacob know that they have a piece of leverage against her. He's sent to Joseph to heal, where he's very subtley and slowly indoctrinated into the cult. He keeps Augustine hidden from Syb and he also keeps it secret that Syb is the one causing misery to the Cult/newfound family Augustine has found himself welcomed into (as much as he and syb love each other, they're not perfect and uh...there are some abandonment issues there). anyway, i'm still kind of ironing out the details of it all, but essentially, after john and faith are neutralized (john dead and faith/rachel safe and getting clean) jacob and joseph are like, "alright, time to use our secret weapon." Syb knows they have Augustine at this point, but she's under the impression that he's a prisoner, not a member of the cult.

So they meet up on neutral ground (i'm thinking tanami island) only instead of a loving and wholesome reunion, Syb finds out that her brother drank the kool-aid and Augustine finds out that his sister is the one causing the "unnecessary" violence plaguing the Project (which also, Joseph is very careful to shield Augustine from the actual violence, and paints the Project as a much more peaceful organization than it actually is). Anyway, cult tactics win over in Augustine's head and he turns against Syb, and given the power vacuum in the Henbane and his *ahem* closeness to Joseph, he's offered the mantle of Herald/Brother Faith. And. Yeah. It's definitely a method to punish/break Syb, and it's also a way to reward Augustine for his loyalty. Even she wouldn't kill or arrest her own brother. That reunion with her brother is the beginning of Syb's breaking point, and everything after that is just her slipping into misery, helplessness, and despair. everything about this is exploitative as hell :)