#cause im already getting reeaaalll low on T so this is already cutting it close but if they have to turn me away again im fuuugggeeedddddd | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

munch-mumbles · 5 days

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had to donate blood earlier today because my blood cell count was too high at my last pp appt to get my t renewed and god. why didnt anyone warn me about your arm going all hot but also cold and not hurting but definitely feeling insanely weird and uncomfortable and Bad. LITERALLY NO ONE TOLD ME SO I WASNT READY AT ALL AND I STARTED MONKEY BRAIN FREAKING OUT

#like yes i anticipated it feeling funny and uncomfy but THAT. SUUUUCCKEEEEDD.#i was only able to go like halfway before i started squirming around too much and when the guy said i could stop whenever i IMMEDIATELY #went I WANNA STOP even though i shouldnt have urrghhhhhh i was just in genuine panic mode which is a little embarassing.#my roommate was there with me to help calm me down and after the fact told me that the guy taking my blood apparently said that #having an instinctive panic response was normal because well. your brain feels all your blood sucking out and thinks FUUUCK IM BLEEDING OUT #(roommate had to tell me because i was like. writhing and whining and trying not to black out so i wasnt hearing anything LOL)#i have the lab followup appt at pp ooonnnn friday where theyll do another finger poke and i swear to god. if my blood cell count isnt low #enough for them to be able to refill my T. im gonna freeeaaaaakkkkkk #cause im already getting reeaaalll low on T so this is already cutting it close but if they have to turn me away again im fuuugggeeedddddd #and the worst part is that im probably gonna have to start regularly donating no matter what anyway =_=#on one hand yes its bound to get easier the more i do it...... thats the case with the little tiny vial blood draws ive been having to do..#but hooooly freak guys. i really wasnt prepared at all for how intense it started feeling WHICH IS DRAMATIC I KNOOOOWWWW #it wasnt helped by them apparently using a much bigger needle so i FELT it POP in and the guy went “wow i really had to force it in there”#or something so i was immediately off to a bad start LOL #AAAAAANYWAYS. SIGH. being on T is awesome but of course im one of the unlucky ones who starts getting way too much blood about it #so now im doomed to be stuck with needles all the time forever #mumbling

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