#catspit.txt

[thecatspit]

More Health (fucked)Updates

So, recent diagnoses and what’s being done about them:

1.) Chiari Type 1 (the whole brain-trying-to-escape-skull thing that’s compressing my spinal cord). On a new med for that, to see if it’ll reduce the pressure in my skull without the need for surgery. It makes my extremities tingle, makes me sleepy, and gives me dry mouth, BUT I also haven’t had a migraine since I started taking it, just a few more-or-less tolerable “normal” headaches.

2.) Some kind of auto-immune thing. Trying to figure out what, specifically, and waiting on a rheumatologist appointment and probably 600 more blood draws for that. According to my primary doctor, my ANA is “the highest [he’s] ever seen.” So that’s, uh. Special. I might have lupus, despite the famous Dr. House wisdom that “it’s never lupus.”

3.) Pretty significant vitamin B12 deficiency, getting weekly shots for that. Bleh.

4.) Also deficient in D3 (how? I take multivitamins and go outside regularly) so I get to take softgels three times a day now.

5.) Gotta find a lawyer for disability stuff, since they didn’t fucking wait until after the neurologist appointment to make a decision on my application. :P

6.) Gotta ask my endocrinologist if getting T is even possible at this point, and if it’s not, what to do. It’s really looking like T is my best option for getting relief from my Hell Periods™ since I’m not a good candidate for basically anything else. Apparently increased estrogen can actually make some autoimmune things worse, lololol.

Incidentally, here’s the current tally of things caused by/related to the Chiari Malformation so far:

- scoliosis + herniated discs in lower spine

- syrinx in upper spine

- chronic radiating nerve pain

- chronic severe migraines

- hand tremors

- maybe the cyst in my brain

Gosh, wouldn’t it have been nice if literally any doctor ever had sent me for an MRI and found this shit sooner? c: c: c: But nah, my chronic pain is tooootally caused by just the scoliosis and having flat feet. $50 shoe inserts and 6 physical therapy appointments per year would have fixed me right up. Totally. Fuck you, California medical system.

[thecatspit]

So guess who just got a new and pretty major diagnosis?

So uhhhhh apparently I have Chiari Malformation Type 1.

Which... is basically when your brain is trying to vacate its residence via the hole your spinal cord enters the skull through. (It sounds scarier than it is.)

This really explains and ties together a bunch of the other shit I’ve been experiencing for years - chronic pain, chronic migraines, the hand tremors I first wrote off as a sleep deprivation side effect and then thought might be multiple sclerosis, the scoliosis + herniated disks + syrinx... If literally any doctor I’d seen in CA had taken me seriously enough to send me for an MRI I could have known about this years ago - the fucking pain specialist I had to wait 6 months to see told me my pain was because I have flat feet. If it didn’t require effort and postage stamps I’d send them all a printout of my MRI with a giant middle finger drawn on it.

So in a couple months I get to see a neurophysiologist to find out if I should consider getting part of my fucking skull removed. c: Because apparently my cerebellum is all up in my spinal cord’s personal space like a creepy dude on a crowded bus and it needs to stop.

[thecatspit]

I had to go to the ER last night because one of my surgical incisions ripped open, and the instructions I was given are literally time travel and whatever the fuck “upright gauze moist” is.

[thecatspit]

I GOT BREAST REDUCTION SURGERY AND IT’S AMAZING

I mean it’s also kind of annoying because my period showed up the same day so I’m super anemic and tired and I’m not sleeping well because I’m sore, but holy crap my tits aren’t the size of small moons anymore.

Will be around more once I feel a little more capable of coherent thought and/or basic functions.

[thecatspit]

I’M NOT DEAD.

Stuff’s been really busy, and my laptop’s been overheating even with a cooling pad, so I can’t leave it on all day - gotta really commit to sitting down at it for a bit to bother starting it up. I’m kind of afraid to run anything else when I’m using Sai and Chrome, because the laptop’s old and has completely shut down from overheating enough times that I worry it’s on its way out.

I have like ten things I need to finish in the next week and a half for the county fair, plus coloring pages for the local library, plus at least one event and one art commission... And that’s on top of medical appointments out the ass, plus watching Girlfriend’s kid so she can go to her appointments, and travel to get her kid to and from the airport in a week so he can visit his dad. Also, errands, cleaning, trying to get the garden into something less like a jungle, trying to get a bone-cleaning setup going... and battling the eighty billion fleas that have attacked us because of the mild winter this year. (Apparently it’s too humid for diatomaceous earth to really work here... fuck everything. So cat baths are happening on a weekly basis, plus flea spray, plus herbal stuff for the bedding/couch, plus shaving the two longhaired cats... I’m ready for the sweet release of death honestly. I wish I could afford topical flea stuff, but with more than a couple of cats it’s too expensive, and I’m not risking using the cheap shit.)

The three-legged kitten I found in June is doing fantastic. His name is Oshi, as a shortening of “oh shit,” which was everyone’s reaction when I found him. We’re probably keeping him, since he gets along so well with all the other cats.

@theliteralhumangarbage @ladynyoko @sinwithagrin @ahkaraii @bratjedi0 @thesinbox and everyone else - I miss you all and I’m sorry I disappeared so damn hard this time. It’ll be easier when I can afford my own smartphone. :T

[thecatspit]

Life Update

Wow, it’s been a really long time since I’ve been on tumblr, or online at all, really. I miss you guys.

So first off, the three-legged kitten I found in June is doing great. His name is Oshi (from “oh shit” because that was everyone’s reaction to my announcement that I’d found him) and we’re keeping him indefinitely because everyone loves him, the adult cats included. Might rehome him to someone local if we hear anyone’s looking for a cat, but since it doesn’t look like he’s going to have any special needs (other than being indoors-only) or big medical expenses, we’re not in a rush.

There’ve been a ton of small “emergencies,” like sister-in-law’s truck dying, one of her horses hurting his leg, Girlfriend’s flight back from Colorado getting fucked up, etc. Mostly just things that fuck up my schedule or take money that I’d been hoping to put towards something else. The most recent thing is my cat Kali being hit by a car. More info about that is here. We think she’s gonna be okay, though.

I want to get a job but I gotta wait until after I have breast reduction surgery in two and a half weeks. Girlfriend hasn’t been able to get the certification she needs to be a substitute teacher, because it costs $150 and we keep having to spend money on the aforementioned surprise emergencies.

Need to get pics of stuff to sell, bleh.

[thecatspit]

Got new meds, got neck x-rays, finally got my new glasses. Started the massive project that is The Gardening so we can have our own veggies and herbs this summer (though all that’s planted so far is tomatoes, bell peppers, and mint). Spring event season is upon us and I’ve begun the never-ending cycle of make merch -> sell merch -> spend several days recovering physically and mentally from the event -> lather, rinse, repeat.

Apologies to everyone I haven’t talked to in a while - I haven’t even fired up Discord in ages because I’ve just been too damn tired and/or busy, and until I can afford my own smartphone again I can’t touch the internet when I’m not home. I heart all you fuckers.

[thecatspit]

When will my free time return from the war...

[thecatspit]

I don’t understand people who give their cats respectable-sounding names. Who are you trying to kid, buddy? We all know you’re gonna be up at 4am yelling “Asstrumpet, I can hear you fucking chewing on that, you crusty butthole on legs!” just like the rest of us.

[thecatspit]

This just in: my insurance will most likely cover a breast reduction and I have a consultation with a plastic surgeon in two months.

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

Also I don’t need spinal surgery, which is kind of a let-down after how hyped I got to get pics of the procedure, but Girlfriend keeps trying to convince me that’s a good thing. (Sounds fake but okay.)

[thecatspit]

So I’m not dead, just busy.

Since Christmas everything is happening all the time. There was Bug’s medical emergency, Girlfriend’s kid had some issues with being physically aggressive at school, I’ve had eight thousand appointments (did intake to see a psychologist about trans shit so I can get hormones, an endocrinologist to confirm that I can get T when that’s done, got x-rays and an MRI and a diagnosis of a herniated disk in my lower back, saw a pain specialist so I can get pain meds that actually do something, got told I might have MS... yeah).

If we were talking, RPing, whatever, and I disappeared on you - it’s not because of anything you did. Gas and vet bills get pretty expensive and I had to let my phone service lapse, so I can’t get on Discord if I’m not at my computer. I still want to talk to you. We are still friends. I just kind of suck at this “regular interaction” thing.

[thecatspit]

what does 'alerm' mean?

Okay, so. I used to spay and neuter stray cats in California. One night I set an alarm to wake me up in time to get a batch of cats to the vet by the 8:00am drop-off. I labeled it “cnats nooter alerm” as an intentional butchering of “cats neuter alarm,” because holy shit was I sleep-deprived. And then when I woke up at six in the fucking morning on four hours of sleep and saw that, it was incredibly funny in the way that only the most inane shit can be when you’re tired. So the full phrase “cnats nooter alerm” is my tag for things that have no right to amuse me as much as they do, and “alerm” is a misspelling of “alarm.”

Dumbest in-joke ever but it stuck.

[thecatspit]

So apparently I have ADHD-PI. That... would explain some things.

It would explain a lot of things.

[thecatspit]

Gee, it sure was nice of the spay clinic to completely not mention the $50+ in fees they charge for booster shots and pain medication on top of the actual spay.

What is the fucking point of a low-cost spay clinic if you’re going to then spring surprise costs on low-income people? We checked and double-checked, and there is no mention of these additional costs on the clinic’s website, in the spay voucher email, or anywhere else. They were not mentioned over the phone. Oh, and they won’t spay our cat unless we pay for this shit. We can’t afford it, because we didn’t know to fucking budget for it, so now we’re out the gas money to get to the clinic, our cat had to fast for 10 hours and spend an hour in the car for nothing, and we have to find another fucking spay clinic.

And the regular vet spays around here cost like $200 for just the spay, no frills.

We waited a month for this appointment. If we’d KNOWN about the fees we could have covered them! I’m so fucking angry.

And I mean, they do spay vouchers - so shouldn’t the voucher cover the boosters and meds if they’re a required part of the procedure? What the fuck.

[thecatspit]

I had a dream that I was crossing the street along with a crowd of people. Crossing from the opposite side were two Jesus cosplayers. One was the stereotypical White Jesus™ and the other guy, who was black, had styled his hair up in braids to make a really intricate crown. He was also really tall. Lots of people were complimenting White Jesus while Black Jesus went ignored.

I arrived at wherever the fuck I had been going and sat down to draw porn on my laptop. After a bit, I got an instant message from some guy who seemed to be trying to flirt with me. He asked what I was drawing. (How did he know I was drawing when he wasn’t in the room with me? How did he get my screen name to contact me? I don’t know. Dream logic.) Annoyed, I tried to put him off by bluntly telling him it was gay porn.

His response was literally “bacon bacon.”

Now, in the dream, this phrase was a meme. It was like the Lenny Face but with the specific implication that he liked guys. I don’t know why “bacon bacon” was a meme that meant “I’m into that and I’m also not straight,” but it was.

So I complimented him on his hair, because I realized that it was Black Jesus from earlier, and told him it was fucked up that no one else appreciated his cosplay. The end.

[thecatspit]

I do at least one impossible thing before breakfast every day. It’s called “waking up.”