#cas ep: pull together push apart

[which-hospital]

Pull Together, Push Apart (12/08/23) and Too Young, Too Soon (19/08/23)

I’ve just realised I never actually posted about these episodes, I watched them both pretty late because my mum always wants me to save watching the whole episode until she can and my dad’s been off work for the past couple weeks so we haven’t had a chance to sit down and watch them together until Monday so I just decided to post about them both at the same time. Because these episodes are mushed together in my brain from watching them one after the other, I’ll probably forget stuff but this is what is still sticking out to me:

Pull Together, Push Apart

I expected that the excessive Faith stuff would ruin this one for me, the thing about Faith is that it’s not even like I love to hate her, I just hate her. I really don’t care about this storyline but the fact that she’s dragged Stevie into it as well now is really shitty. Can’t wait until this stuff is done.

The Jacob and Iain stuff actually made this episode for me, it was all so good that it actually made up for everything else. I really enjoy the paramedics as a whole group and the dynamics that are there and Jacob really feels like he’s become a part of all of that now and I really loved their scenes together in today’s episode.

I feel like appreciate Donna in Casualty more than I did in Holby? I liked her over there but I’ve been loving her since she joined Casualty and I thought she was great in both of these episodes!

Too Young, Too Soon

I guess I expected that with Ffion and Gethin hiding what they were from Jan, she wouldn’t get to retire but it ended up being so painful, that moment of realisation! I think it’s even worse because Jan’s just had the kind of day that makes you decide you still want to be a paramedic and she’s come out of it, yeah, questioning her decision but still wanting to retire and her having that moment where she’s like “it’s all a lie��, just </3

I didn’t expect to be so on board with Rash and Rida and I think it could be this week’s spoilers influencing my thoughts and I kind of would still appreciate Rida as Rash’s permanent wingwoman but I’m on board with them as a couple just because I think they’re both so sweet!

I’m starting to see how the Donna and Max stuff will end up happening, like it’s started to make sense now. I’m so glad Donna has told the truth just for a lot of reasons, I’m very happy with the direction this storyline’s going in.

Guitar man, my favourite character.

Oh yeah, nearly forgot this. I get that for writing reasons Sah couldn’t be at Jan’s not-quite-happening-anymore retirement party BUT I AM SO SAD ABOUT THAT. I know the two of them have had their ups and downs and whatever but did “it would be lovely if you could realise how many people care about you, we’re family” mean nothing???? They should’ve been there, there should’ve at least been some vague justification.

[greekowl87]

Really, this isn't an ask. It is a demand. A demand for the sex failure fic from my headcanon. While I take months and/or years to work on my fic, I expect better from everyone else. 😉

@90saolchatroom Trying to finish this drove me crazy and I hope I did it justice. I really, really hope you like it. :) I’d imagine this taking place during “Little Green Men” since some of the lines are from the ep. Sorry for any typos. Tagging @today-in-fic

Mulder and Scully were no longer partners. The higher ups made that perfectly clear.

It had been an odd dance during their brief partnership. She did not know who was leading who. The more she worked with him, Mulder left her feeling odd. There was something she could not quite name. He was obnoxious and endearing at the same time. He valued her opinion, treated her equally���called her Scully when everyone else called her Dana. By the time they shut down the basement office, they found themselves separated and isolated again. In Quantico, her only company was lab reports and the dead. She began to worry about her former partner. Was he okay? Why wouldn’t he reach out to her? When she saw him walking in the hallways and he didn’t reach out, she became worried. Had she become that invisible?

One thing she had learned from him was the cloak and dagger routine. That was how she finally got him to contact her beneath the hotel parking garage by the Watergate. He looked like he had not slept in days and her heartstrings pulled for her former partner. Mulder looked wildly at her and more desperate. She stilled him, catching his hand, as he tried to pace restlessly back and forth.

Mulder sighed. “It’s dangerous for us just to have a little chat, Scully. We must assume we’re being watched.”

“Mulder, I haven’t seen any indication…”

He shook his head. “No, no, of course not. These people are the best.”

What did she have to do to reach out to him? To connect with him. “I’ve taken all of the necessary precautions. I have doubled back over my tracks to make sure that I haven’t been followed and no one has ever followed me. The X-Files have been terminated, Mulder. We have been reassigned. I mean, what makes you think they care about us anymore anyway?”

“So why have you bothered to come here covertly?”

Really? Was he really that obtuse? “Because I realized that it was the only way that you would see me.”

He stared at her as if she had spoken some foreign language and gazed at her as if unsure of what to do. “So what do you want?”

“To know that you’re all right. Mulder, you passed me today within a foot, but you were miles away.”

He gave a hollow laugh.“They’ve got me on electronic surveillance. White-bread cases, bank fraud, insurance fraud, health care swindles.”

“Mulder, I know that you feel… frustrated that without the bureau’s resources, it’s impossible for you to continue…”

“No, it…”

“Well, what then? When the bureau first shut us down, you said that you would go on for as long as the truth was out there. But I no longer feel that from you.”

“What should you feel then, Scully?”

“I don’t know, Mulder. Something. Anything. You believe I am still a spy sent to debunk your work?”

“No. I haven’t believed that since we got back from Bellefleur,” he told her. He squatted against the wall in defeat. “You aren’t a spy.”

She felt that snap of electricity again since she first realized what it was on the way back from back to Bellefleur. Tentatively, she reached out and touched his forearm. The touch went unnoticed and feeling still annoyed about him ignoring her earlier that day, she squeezed his forearm, instantly drawing his attention. As if sensing the shift in the parking garage, he licked his lips as if trying to form a word.

“Stop acting like you are all by yourself on this, Mulder.”

“I feel like a fool, Scully. Crazy Spooky Mulder screaming at the sky with no one listening.”

Scully sat back on her heels and took his hand. “Let’s go somewhere tonight. You come with me and we have fun. You look like you could use a drink.”

“I don’t want a drink, Scully. I don’t want to do anything…”

“One drink won’t kill you.”

She dragged him to his feet. “And you can tell me more about how you enjoy screaming at the sky…”

Mulder let her drag him to his feet like a broken toy and she wrapped her arm around his waist and he looked at her surprised at the gesture. “Sorry,” she whispered. Her cheeks were flushed.

He eyes looked at her tenderly and he wiped a stray lock from her cheek. “It’s fine.”

Reluctantly and almost awkwardly, she let her arm drop. “Besides, if they were watching us now,” she continued, trying to justify her excuse to go out, “a dive bar will be the last place they would think of.”

“It’s okay, Scully. I agreed.” He was quiet as they walked. They exited out of the parking garage and onto the streets of D.C. They walked together in silence, closely as if personal space had no meaning, and into one of D.C.’s less reputable bars. “It is nice to see you as well, Scully,” he added as an afterthought.

She gave a weak smile in response.

They navigated to a booth in the back of the room. A cocktail waitress took their order and brought two Shiner Bocks. Mulder shed his trenchcoat and pulled loose his tie. Scully took off her own jacket and sat stiffly on the leather bench. He stretched and threw his arms on the back of the booth, his left hand precariously close to her shoulder. She could feel the tips of his fingers grazing the edge of her jacket. The physical closeness still unnerved her but Scully had grown used to it, however, tonight felt different.

“Even though we have both established I am not a spy and the office is shut down doesn’t mean you have to go live in exile, Mulder.” She sipped her beer tentatively. “You still have a friend.”

“That’s touching, Scully,” he scoffed. “Where did they send after they shut me down?”

“I think you mean us, Mulder,” she mumbled. She cleared her throat. “Back to Quantico.”

“Back to Quantico,” he repeated. “And where did they send me?”

Scully remained quiet. She knew they stuck him in a new hole to transcribe countless hours of audio tape as punishment. No one wanted anything to do with Spooky Mulder except her. “Well,” she started, trying to break the tension, “at least you are saving on rent.”

Mulder narrowed his eyes and she swallowed another swig of beer, uncertain of his reaction before he chuckled and rolled his eyes. She saw the tension and stress from the past few days washed away as he slouched further back in the booth. “I don’t know, Scully. I still miss the cattle mutilation slides.” He licked his lips as his hazel eyes flicked over her. “And the company.”

“I agree with the company. I could do without the cattle slides. I do miss whatever it is we do when we talk.”

“Verbal sparring?”

“Something like that. It’s good to see you, Mulder.”

“You too, Scully.”

“I could say the same.”

Hours crawled slowly by but to Mulder and Scully, aided by the beers, time seemed to fly. By then, Mulder’s arm had found itself around her shoulders and she noticed how comfortable she was sitting beside him, barely touching. Scully hiccupped and looked at her watch. “I…I should get going.”

“You are in no mood to drive tonight,” he declared.

“Mulder, I don’t need a chivalrous knight. I need a taxi. And a hot bath.”

“Just make me feel better. Come and spend a few hours at my apartment and sleep it off. Then you can get a taxi. I’ll even leave you money.”

She smiled indulgently, her fingers crawling up his arm flirtatiously. “What happened to they’re watching us? Electronic surveillance, Mulder.”

Mulder suddenly felt braver and smiled. “Must be all the cloak and dagger you started earlier tonight. Maybe you are a spy. Come on, Scully. Amuse me. We can even play truth or dare if you want.”

“No, Mulder.” She sighed and saw the pouting lips. How could she say no to that face? “Fine, but just for a few hours.”

He put a couple of 20 dollar bills on the table and the two former FBI agents left and disappeared into the night. She laughed at something he said. Mulder let his fingers lightly graze hers and to his utter surprise, she took it. Something was changing between them. As they arrived at his apartment, she shed her coat and sat on his worn leather couch. He followed behind her, taking off his suit jacket as well, and collapsed on the couch next to her.

Scully could feel the intensity of Mulder’s gaze to the point she started to blush. “What?”

He bent forward and pushed away a stray lock of red hair and kissed her neck slowly. She stiffened and he rubbed her thigh gently in an effort to get her to relax.

“Mulder, what are you doing?”

“Hm. Checking in on you. Returning the favor.”

Her body was betraying her as she felt something began to awaken. Despite the tension she felt, she did began to relax and focus on the Mulder’s soft lips. “Mulder, we shouldn’t…”

His kissing grew more insistent as she felt her own body take control and her brain and heart become spectators in what was happening. He leaned heavily against her so that she had to lay down onto the couch to accommodate him. His hands began to unbutton her suit jacket and blouse. His rough fingertips felt the soft fabric of her bra and she drew in a sharp breath.

“Scully, you smell divine,” he murmured.

“Mulder,” she tried again.

He kissed her deeply, silencing any protests that she may have. Again, her body had forsaken her as she ran her fingers through Mulder’s hair and deepened the kiss. What was it about him? She knew that the electricity and chemistry between them had existed but she never thought it could lead to this point. For as second, she panicked and worried about Bureau protocol and any implications it could have.

“Who is gonna care,” he murmured. He tenderly kissed on the breast while his free hand palmed the other. “We don’t work together anymore.”

As she helped him get rid of her blouse, her own hands began to pull at his own dress shirt as her brain began to reply what he had just said. Who is gonna care, he had taunted, We don’t work together anymore. Taunted? Mulder didn’t taunt. He would not consider her some one night stand. If he was proceeding this, with her consent, it meant some more. Or did it? Her mind had blacked out for a second because the next thing she knew was that he was desperately tearing at a condom wrapper with his teeth in a rushed effort to tear it off and here she was, half naked on his leather couch about to get it. She should be happy. Joyous even because she had heard the rumors and how attractive the vast majority of female agents and sectaries found Mulder.

“Scully,” he breathed with the foil between his teeth, “a little help? Lift your hips.”

A ringing telephone interrupted them as both stared quietly as it went to the answering machine. “Mmmm…Marty, it’s Veronica,” a sultry voice crackled against the heavy air. “It’s been awhile. I miss you and uh, our lovely chats at little green men…”

Mulder reached up and ripped the phone off the hook and stared at Scully. “Scully, it’s not what you think.”

At this point, her mind having finally caught up with her body, she buttoned her blouse and began to gather her things. “It’s none of my business, Mulder,” she said slowly, lowering her gaze, “with what you do with your, uh, spare time.”

“Scully.” Her lowered gaze made him suddenly feel like an ass. What the hell had he been thinking? “Sure. Fine. Whatever. Be that way.”

“It’s clear we are probably meant to be just…”

“Work acquaintances,” he fished. “Got it.”

“No. No, Mulder. Friends. Maybe. One day.”

“We are…” He groaned in frustration. “We are friends, Scully. We are…”

“Just friends. I get it, Mulder. I get it.” She took a deep breath and gathered her trench coat. “Just the type of friends that hang out for a beer maybe or call on if you need an autopsy or follow on wild goose chases. I get it. I’m there if you need something. My mistake.”

“Scully, let me explain. Veronica, she…I have never even met her in person!”

She shook her head, already embarrassed enough. It was clear this would have been nothing than a one night stand between them. “Let’s just pretend this never happened, okay? We can still be work friends or whatever. Don’t be a stranger, Mulder.”

“Are you that blind? Scully, this is a misunderstanding!”

“Good night, Mulder.”

She gathered her jacket and slipped out the apartment door and into the night, vowing if what had just happened had not destroyed their relationship, she would still try to salvage any semblance of a partnership by pretending this night never happened. If he wanted a friend, she would be his friend and chase him to whatever he went because that is what she would do for her friends.

[thing-you-do-with-that-thing]

My Reason

Characters: Y/N, Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester (mentioned), Mary, Cas and Lucifer (briefly mentioned)

Pairing: Dean x Reader

Warnings: A tiny bit of angst at first but it’s all good. Smut, the fluffy love making kind.      

Word Count: 1400ish

A/N: This is a two birds with one stone sorta of a thing. I promised @salvachester fluffy Dean smut and an aesthetic (hence why this fic has one) because she spend hours helping me create the new theme on my blog. Love you Scar. I hope you like this one.

It is also my entry for @iwantthedean’s SoCo Summer Challenge where my prompt was You’re my reason for breathing, but I kinda used the song the line is from for inspiration as well. Hence the tiny bit of angst in the beginning. Listen to Something Corporate - She Paints Me Blue.

It is set after ep 12x22 but before the massacre that was the finale.

Thanks to the sweet amazing @deansleather for betaing this one for me. Love you Maddy <3

***My fics are not to be saved nor posted on any other sites without my express written permission.***

Dean knew he had no right to be here. He had pushed her away a long time ago. Back when the Mark was still on his arm. He had told her he didn’t love her anymore and he had practically thrown her out of the Bunker. Every since the Mark got ripped from his arm he had been telling himself what he had done was for the best. He knew that he had hurt her, but she left the life. She was safe. She could be happy without him, but the truth was he couldn’t be happy without her. Not even close. Y/N had left a gaping hole where his heart used to be. He had tried to fill it with booze and women, but no matter who he screwed or how much he drank the void was always there.

Admitting that to himself however hadn’t been easy. He yelled at Sam every time he brought her up and he told himself that he was fine. She was just a girl right? There was plenty of girls in this world. Nothing special about her. Other than there was. It had taken Dean being almost buried alive in his own home to see that. All he could think about being trapped in the Bunker while the air slowly ran out was her. He saw her at every turn of the halls. Her smile, her eyes, her body. He heard her laughter echoing off the walls, her soft whisper telling him how much she loved him.

Y/N had been the only one that had ever truly understood him. She had been the only one to accept him for who he was. Flaws, failures and all. She had been his light that guided him home on the darkest of days and now his light was gone. Dean needed her like the air that was getting harder to breath. All had been able to think about was how he wanted to have her in his arms one last time. He had regretted all the things he had said and all the things that he hadn’t. He loved her, with everything he had and she would never hear him say that.

So when Dean had made it out of the Bunker. When he had brought his mom home and when Cas had healed him, Dean left. He knew there was things to be done and a world to be saved, but the world had his family and Dean needed his girl by his side. Sam had understood, knowing he would be back with her by his side or back on his own, broken hearted but ready to fight. Just like always, Dean would stove his crap and keep moving on, but he needed to know if she was still his. He needed her to know, she would always be the only woman he had ever truly loved. The only woman he could ever love.

So here he was, standing outside her home in the pouring rain. Too scared to move. He had faced the worst of the worst this world had to offer, but seeing her, knowing it might be the last time, that scared him more than anything he had ever encountered.

She was better off without him. Dean had hurt her, knowingly, even if he had sworn that was something he would never do. She had been out of the life for 3 years now and he had no right to be here. Dean took a deep breath letting his tears mix with the rain as he slowly turned around to walk away but froze the second he heard her voice.

“You came all this way to get pneumonia and not even say hey?” There was no anger or blame in her voice as Dean turned around slowly. She was standing on the sidewalk not 3 feet from him and Dean sucked in a breath. She was even more beautiful than he remembered. The rain making her clothes cling to every curve of her body as she stood there smiling at him. He didn’t deserve her. Not in the slightest. She should be yelling at him, crying, screaming, telling him to piss off and never come back, but she was smiling.

“I knew you would come for me one day,” she spoke softly as she walked towards him.

“Y/N I am so sorry,” Dean started, but then her arms was around his neck and his instinctively closed around her waist.

“Shut up and kiss me you fool,” she teased and Dean didn’t need to be told twice. He kissed her, pouring all the things he couldn’t say into it. He told her with his kiss how sorry he was, what an idiot he had been, how much he missed her and needed her.  

Y/N slowly pulled away with a dazed expression on her face and Dean couldn’t help but smile when she took his hand leading him back towards her house and her bedroom. Fuck he had missed making her look like that. He had missed showing her how he really felt and how precious she was. So that is what he did the second their soaked clothes hit the floor.

He gently laid her down on her bed without a worked, his fingers tracing her body. Refamiliarizing himself with it. His lips caressing every inch of her skin, sucking down on every sweet spot he had never forgotten, making her moan his name over and over, begging for him to go where she really needed him.

Who was he to deny her anything. Dean buried his face between her legs, kissing her cunt burying his tongue inside of her, fucking her with it in much the same way as he had kissed her earlier. Worshipping her as he used his skills to apologize to her over and over until she came screaming his name, smothering his head with her strong thighs, but Dean didn’t care. He didn’t try to move. He stayed right where he belong, helping her through her high until her body finally stopped shaking and she relaxed beneath him.

He slowly kissed his way up her body, until he reached her lips. He kissed her tenderly and sweetly as he slowly let himself sink into her welcoming heat. He had forgotten how good she felt wrapped around him and it took every ounce of willpower he possessed to not come apart right then and there. This wasn’t about him. It was about her and him showing her how deeply he cared. How sorry he was and promising her he would never leave her again. They belonged together like two pieces of a puzzle and without her Dean would never feel whole.

Dean slowly moved inside of her, making her feel everything as his hands roamed her body everywhere he could reach and his lips on hers. He pulled away to look deeply into her eyes, never stopping his movements as he made his confession.

“You are my reason for breathing Y/N/N. You’re my everything. I love you,” Dean smiled lovingly as she gasped. She had told him those three words more times than he could remember but he had never been brave enough to say them back. Now he was. He was never holding anything back with her ever again. Now that he had her back in his arms, so breathtakingly beautiful beneath him he was never letting her go ever again.

“I love you too, Dee,” she whispered making him smile even wider before his lips was back on hers and his pace quickened ever so slightly, pushing them both towards their release. It wasn’t earth shattering or strong. In was slow and lasting, just like his love for her had always been. It was her and him against the world. With her by his side there was nothing he couldn’t do. Together they would return to Sam and beat Lucifer back to the deepest pit of hell where he belongs. No power no matter how ancient or strong could conquer their love or battle the strength he possessed when he was with her. The Mark she had left on his heart and soul was eternal and lasting. She was not only his reason for living, but his strength to carry on and his determination to win. She was his everything.   

Dean Tag Team

 @mysupernaturalfics @blacktithe7 @percywinchester27 @torn-and-frayed @iamnotsaneatall @naadestiel @jpadjackles @flufy07 @crushing83 @sleep-silent-angel @fuckyeahfeysand @deanxfuckingadorablexwinchester @d-s-winchester @akshi8278 @feelmyroarrrr @kayteonline @hexparker @docharleythegeekqueen @starswirlblitz @faith-in-dean @knittingknerdy @quiddy-writes @lenaabs @petrovadixon @blanketmadeofstar @arryn-nyxx @winchesters-flannels @winchester-writes @ruprecht0420  @tas898 @emilywritesaboutdean @salvachester @emoryhemsworth @tennesseewhiskey-and-pie @mogaruke @supernatural-jackles @jojo-nz @riakie @anokhi07 @adriellej @michirutenshi @dance4angels @castielsbecky @charliebradbury1104 @jayankles @mouselovesmusic @jensenackesl @twistnshoutx @im-most-definitely-fangirling @dudalleo @ivvitm1109 @kathaswings @sinbadcat83 @winchestdiaries @thebunkerismyhome @iwriteaboutdean @winchesterprincessbride @captainradicalpassion @mrswhozeewhatsis @zanthiasplace @redunicorn10 @brooke-supernatural16 @haleyhay96 @covarrubiasalex @becauseimawinchester @deansbaekaz2y5 @mamapeterson @spn-fan-girl-173 @secretlyfurrydragon @be-amaziing @winchesterswoonathon @sandlee44 @roxy-davenport @profkmoriarty13 @bringmesomepie56 @sonofabitch-spn @impala-dreamer @jensen-jarpad @deansleather @heyitsilverwolf @allfandomxreader @caffeine-countingstars @yoursmilemakesmeloveyou @icequeen1371  @phoenixia67 @kaylajnae13 @chickenmcsade @atc74 @chaos-and-the-calm67 @brihughes4 @aiaranradnay @angelsdeadromance @findingfitnessforme @muliermalefici @amazinntay @katarinfrost @castiels-broken-fool @bemyqueenofdarkness @moonstar86

[agl03]

Hi! :) After the no Fitzsimmons nonsense of this season, are they seriously thinking about separate them AGAIN or even break them up?? They have done nothing as a couple, except crying... and let's face it the apartment thing was a prank. I won't lie, I won't take it anymore, if the season begins with them apart, I will shut down the tv... If it is a "forever love" but they only show it the first day and in the very last ep without nothing in-between, following the journey is useless. :/ :(

Hi Anon!

We don’t know what they are going to do with Fitzsimmons when we first come back…there is a very good chance that the writers don’t know what they are going to do either.  I think that they have an endgame in mind…and its a matter of what route they take to get there.   And as they go into Season 5 they stand at a fork in the road as to what direction they want to take.  

Its okay to feel upset and even betrayed right now.  I did, and I still do a bit.  I’m getting better as I re watch and have a few metas under my belt.  But I definitely am going to be a lot more careful with anything they tell us from now on…good and bad.  I do hope the writers and show runners are more careful too.  Seeing the hurt.  IE don’t put things out there you don’t intent on paying off or worse lead us to believe it will be paid off when you very well know you won’t.

The way I’m looking at it is if they were going to break them up we would have seen the break up in the finale.   We saw Philinda take the step back, if Fitzsimmons were going to do the same I think we would have had a heartbreaking scene where Fitz pushed her away and said that he needed time.  But we didn’t.   We got a scene where he point blank said that there his his love for Jemma would never fade and that there was only room in his heart for her.  With the “other woman” who had orchestrated things so that she would be his “whole world” sitting right next to him and she meant NOTHING romantically to him.  Nothing.  He had the same amount of time worth of memories and “transferred feelings” for Ophelia as he did Jemma, and Jemma won hands down.

We saw Jemma go through hell to get him back.  That her feelings hadn’t changed either, that she didn’t blame him for anything.  It wasn’t him.  And she saw that affirmation as well.  

Did we get a chance to see THAT desperately needed conversation.  No.  And not gonna lie or sugar coat it.  That totally sucks and the writers dropped the ball.  Not only did they run out of time, I think they honestly thought that what they did was “enough’ of a pay off.   Don’t get me wrong, that pod scene is now one of my all time favorite scenes.  It was amazing and powerful…and had that been the last thing we saw of Fitzsimmons this season I think most of the fandom would be good right now.  Because there it ended with them holding each other in that silent affirmation that they were there for each other through it all.   They really had no idea how much of a toll the Framework Arc would take on the Fandom.  And in the past we really haven’t been a hard fandom to please.  They are used to giving us epic moments that are spread out and we’re content to gif the heck out of it for a few months.  But we’re expecting more now because Fitzsimmons have grown both as characters and in their relationship and we want to see moments that reflect that.  

We did get some great moments, where they HUGE moments we had all been excited about going into the season?  Again,no.  But in more of Fitzsimmons fashion it was those little moments that spoke to their love and deep connection.

Bed cuddles

Adorable in the lab with the boxes “Cue Jemma Gasping”

Love Nest Shopping

Fight

“She’s out there all alone and I’m gone”/the ENTIRE team affirming how much they mean to each other.

Beautiful Reunion hugs

Fitzsimmonsing to stop Eli and double gun shot

Tormenting Talbot

Comfort Kiss

I mean the whole of 12 for me I just love WITH bonus “Your the best” face grab kiss.

“Don’t do that” with you didn’t die hugs and working together

Comforting Fitz and we’ll fix this together

Rip our hearts out but yet look he was thinking about Marriage before this all went to hades.

Jemma digging myself out of a grave to get to my man Anne Simmons

“If you do this I lose him forever” “I love him”

Pain, more pain, but we started to suspect that AIDA had stolen Fitzsimmons relationship for herself. along with Fitz.

Uniting behind our collective hate for Papa Fitz and cheering Jemma on as he went after him….after totally sneaking out when Daisy said they had to leave him behind.

More pain but Jemma would rather die than say she meant nothing to him.

Fitz woke up from a nightmare he was the monster in we need to get to him

Confirmation AIDA stole Fitzsimmons relationship for herself

Leopold “I”ll only ever love Jemma” James Fitz….with Jemma hearing it.

Beautiful reunion crying hugs

Tricking the obsessed, crazy android with a fake fight.

Jemma getting to unload a ton of bullets into AIDA

FItzsimmons getting to watch The Rider and Dad Off Front runner Coulson take care of the contrived roadblock in epic fashion.  

Jemma’s “amen” to that they weren’t letting him face whatever alone, didn’t blame him, and were going to help him heal.  

I likely missed some but we had something in nearly every single episode this season.  Again, no not the big sweep us off the feet and make us swoon traditional shipper moments.  But the more quiet Fitzsimmons ones we’ve had all along.  Again, I’m not saying I wouldn’t love me a really nice over the top shipper moment (because really writers would one good proper kiss have killed you, no), but they did give us something in nearly every single episode (which is uncommon for a show like this) and I would be bereft if I didn’t mention that here.  

Yes, they took the Love Nest from us…and now I know why.  Because its not time for Endgame yet…they let us and them get THIS CLOSE.  Not only were they looking to move off base but Shield was back on the up and up, they didn’t have to hide anymore.   Then,they and we lost it.  Jed and Mo constantly talk in interviews about the cost of the job and the toll it can take, how Fitzsimmons is one of the best ways for them to show it, this was a way of showing that.   We started the season so close and now they’ve been pulled deeper into the shadows by whoever took them than they were before.  And I’ll take losing the Love Nest to losing them together…sorry breakfast nook.   

The Love Nest is the Seychelles of this Season, that thing we lost because of the crap that happened.

This continues to give pull to my theory that eventually Fitzsimmons will say enough is enough and choose each other over the job once and for all.  And they had that decision taken from them in this finale as they were whisked way by who knows who to god knows where.

As ‘betrayed’ as I feel by the writers right now believe it or not I do have faith that they are going somewhere with all this.  That Fitzsimmons with Perthshire, Wedding, and Babies is all in the cards.  But its Endgame and until they are ready to have that happen, they will continue to put roadblocks in the way.   I’m honestly okay with roadblocks to endgame but they do need to give us Hope in between and need to let them face the next ones together as a couple.  

The one that seems to have been set up is now getting Fitz to forgive himself.  They’ve set it up that Jemma is the one who will help him do that.  Real couples face difficult situations all the time and don’t break up because of it.  This is their chance to show a couple dealing with a traumatic event while staying together and helping each other heal.   I don’t think they’ve set up them breaking up and getting back together, that is a traditional trope and if anything AOS doesn’t do traditional tropes in the traditional way.

Take the “love triangle” we had this season.  The ‘traditional’ or easy way of doing this would have been for Fitz to fall for AIDA in the real world.  But NOPE in order for it to even happen…he had to be kidnapped, brainwashed, and manipulated while being thrown in to a nightmare hell world designed by a Robot who wanted his mind and his relationship with Jemma.  

I do have concerns they will have them split up physically or make it so even if they are together the situation they’ve been forced into is somehow keeping them apart.  Be it they have physically been taken to separate locations or whoever took them won’t allow them to be together outside the lab kind of thing (though Coulson seemed to have some sort of freedom on there).  

I know none of what I just said will take the pain away or ease that distrust for the writers now.  They made their bed and have to lie in it.   A lot of this comes down to us and them having very different definitions/expectations of words like reward and soon.  Its okay to be tired of being given the run around too, because I’m there too.  They have made it so its more frustrating than fun.  They crossed a line thinking what they had was enough to make up for it, and for most of the battered fandom it wasn’t.  I’m ready to see them be a couple dealing with this stuff, not fighting to get back to each other.  There are plenty of interesting stories to tell there.  

However if you really feel empassioned and want to make your voice heard you can do that. Just like when we were fighting for renewal.  And I can not emphasize this enough that if you choose to send feedback to do it  POLITELY, POSITIVELY, AND RESPECTFULLY! We learned from AIDA that throwing a tantrum doesn’t get what you want.   

ABC has a feed back form that you can fill out on its shows.   We busted this out a few months ago to fight for renewal, now you can do it if you want to send in your opinion.  HERE is a post that has the link and instructions…just change from renewal to your thoughts on the story. 

Tweet at ABC and Agents of Shield.  Using #fitzsimmons and #agentsofshield

DO NOT tweet at Jed, Mo, Colo, Mark, the other writers, or the cast personally with this stuff. 

Going forward I’m going to be incredibly careful with ANYTHING we get from Jed and Mo.  I pretty much already disregard anything from the Jeff’s since they troll us so much.  I don’t want to get burned again.  I will not go into next season expecting kisses, romantic dinners, and heartfelt conversations about recovery, love, and forgiveness.  That is what fan fic is for.  

Rather I’ll watch for and appreciate those small moments while reveling in the big ones.  They like to surprise us with the BIG moments, Sandwich, Maybe there is 2.22, Sunrise/Perthshire 3.7, First Kiss 3.8 (we wouldn’t have seen that one coming a mile away had they not released that pic to EW), Handhold in 3.15,  Kisses 3.17,Undercover and ensuing sexy times 3.18 (again we had the undercover tease and waited MONTHS to see that…and most of you likely though I was downright crazy for that prediction too) Love Nest 4.4, Thinking of proposing 4.15.  So I’m going to sit back and wait for the next one to surprise me!  

And I will hope that the writers see they did hurt us and dial back the trolling, teasing, and pain.  Don’t tease things they have no intention of delivering or be a bit more honest about the timeline of such things (cough engagement cough).   Not only throughout hiatus but into next season.  

[which-hospital]

I feel like this episode tonight will be a good episode

But I fell like everything in the last couple of episodes was rushed if that makes sense it all happened way to fasten

I’m not sure how I’m feeling about this weeks episode. Honestly, I really do not like the Faith storyline at all and knowing how much it’s going to be in tonight’s episode just has me feeling more excited about the spoilers that’ll come out afterwards than the episode itself - most of my favourite parts of Casualty right now seem to be going in the background this week which is fine but it does kind of lower the stakes for me. There are still elements of the episode that I’m looking forward to, I’m happy to be seeing more of Jacob and Iain together and I also enjoyed that clip of Cam and Ryan that got posted to the Casualty social media accounts, so it’s not all negative and I’m sure there’ll be good bits.

Maybe the pacing in storylines I’m paying less attention is a little fast and I haven’t noticed but at least for the storylines I really care about, I haven’t minded the pacing (it’s made sense to me writing-wise but it’s all subjective). Hooke’s Law and Little White Lies were simultaneously like the aftermath of Burning Bridges (even if there was quite a while between them airing) and the set up of this new stuff with Donna so that’s maybe why it might��ve felt a little fast paced recently.

[which-hospital]

Whenever I do my spoiler posts I let myself just indulge in basically only talking about Sah, Teddy and Paige, and with the spoilers we’ve had for both this week and next week’s episodes it’s looking like we might not be getting much of them for a while so I’ve not been making my spoiler posts, sorry about that! We’ve gotten stuff for next week’s episode but the Radio Times summary isn’t any more detailed than the BBC one and Digiguide is giving me nothing so we’ve basically got nothing but a cast list for next week.

My favourite Casualty character is Guitar man.

Looks like next week’s episode will deal with the Donna stuff some more and also the stuff with Jan which I won’t mind, I’m enjoying both of those. I think the names of these episodes are interesting (just seems like a bit of a pattern with like the similar format of them: Pull Together, Push Apart and Too Young, Too Soon).

Based on the cast lists, Sah, Teddy and Paige won’t all be in an episode together until at least 37x44 (which, pattern detection brain would like to point out, is interesting considering that 36x44, Survivor, was a big episode for where both Sah and Paige were at last year and also featured a reasonable amount of Teddy in Sah’s storyline and is also leaving IPlayer this week so rewatch while you can). Sah and Paige should be in this week’s ep and Teddy is in next week’s - which is why I don’t think we’ll get much of them because it doesn’t seem like we’re getting anything between Sah and Paige this week and I think at least Sah and Teddy would need to be in an episode together for the drama to properly continue.

[which-hospital]

I didn’t post about the BBC episode summary/cast list for next weeks episode yesterday because I didn’t have anything to say but Digiguide’s extended summary and cast list is interesting.

So the summary gives us some more details and like I feel like the possibility of this Faith stuff finally being over is too good to be true, they’ve done this so many times now that I don’t actually believe it will ever end. I feel like it’s going to become a thing where everyone is being blamed for stealing the Diazepam.

The cast list is interesting to me because Arin Smethurst is on there but I didn’t expect Sah to be back until the episode after this one. I don’t entirely trust that this cast list is accurate but the first couple names on it match up with the BBC one (in a different order) so it could be right. I said I wouldn’t be surprised if the writers come up with an excuse for Sah to show up in the hospital during their leave but maybe their leave will already be over (I expected them to make a bigger deal of it)? I’d been thinking that they’d do whatever they are gonna do with Teddy and Paige this week and then put all that stuff to the side next week and then bring it all back the week after with Sah coming back to work. (I am sorry that every time I post spoilers I post them with a rant about some minor detail that is relevant to this stuff, people who care more about the other storylines must be so exhausted.)