#captivity arc + el camino continue to have a vicious psychological hold on me

[kylejsugarman]

as undeniably awful as every aspect of jesse being literally enslaved and held captive is for reasons of he was literally enslaved and held captive, it is so fucked up specifically that he was forced to keep making meth. he was so so so close to getting out for good, for finally severing all ties to this business that he was manipulated and coerced and bullied into staying in. then cue god sending his only son to die metaphors only instead of the quiet peace of death, of three days of silence, he is condemned to his own personal hell of having to keep cooking. fighting dog who only wants to curl up and rest but has to keep fighting and winning battles without any hope of relief. addict chained up, coerced to cook his vice day in and day out. carrying the sins of the father like a bin of fresh product, damned to carry out everyone else’s sentence. it’s like if you rolled the rock away from the tomb, jesus was still there, blinded by the dark and desperate for another crucifixion in the hopes this one might finally release him.