#can you blame autocorrect for a speaking mistake??

[sprinkleofquirk]

What I was debating between saying:

“That’s one big can of worms” or

“You made your bed, now lie in it”

What my mouth decided to say instead:

“You opened this can of worms, now lie in it”

[meili-sheep]

Hello, Kai, really interested in knowing the relationship of sumeru characters and diluc. Also, fontaine characters too (those who we know/already meet)

I think that Navia and Diluc have some stuff in common... I think

This is my first time asking you, so please ignore mistakes

Hello! Welcome! And don't worry about mistakes my brain has this really nice autocorrect feature called dyslexia so about 70% of the time I don't any grammar or spelling errors. But it back fires a lot. Kind of like regular autocorrect. ANY WAY. I would kind of love to talk about this.

SUMERU

Al Haitham

So I do enjoy shipping Diluc and Al Haitham because well they would just absolutely vibe together. Defiantly a lot of autism to autism communication. They are also both they type of people who can work or do separate activates right next to each other and come away saying they really like each other and the other is a good person.

Like their relationship could be them hardly speaking to each other but they just genuinely enjoy company and having someone understand on different level.

Candace

So I firmly think she (and Dehya for that matter) would look at Diluc and go "baby"

She's a protector and would in a small way equate Diluc to a little prince or knight. And I think if she learned about Diluc's family history she might feel a common ground there. And she'd defiantly pick up on how young, but accomplished he is. Just generally he'd kick in her protective instincts. SPECIALLY SINCE HE'D BE A VERY RESPECTFULLY GOOD BOY.

Cyno

Honestly I think Diluc would really enjoy Cyno's jokes. Not to the point where he'd laugh out loud but defiantly remark about how funny and clever it is. And Cyno just get the glint in his eyes that Collei and Tighnari fear.

I've also had them together in The Teyvat Detective Club Because they have strong senses of right and wrong with focuses on justice and retribution. So I kind of think out of everyone in Sumeru Diluc and Cyno would be the closest as friends.

Collei

So I believe Diluc know of Collie. Lisa does tell him about her progress and he's got a silent investment and pride. But he doesn't really think he need to introduce himself. She doesn't need to know that he cause the distraction and took the blame for her accident. But he's always extra gentle with her.

For Collei's part she probably is just amazed by Diluc and how gentle and calming his presence is. With Tighnari she's probably been told to be very careful with Pyro vision, but she doesn't see the Choatic side of Diluc. Diluc reminds her a lot of a camp fire, a warm relaxing. She probably see him as an exemplar of what Knights are supposed to be based off of what Amber has told her.

And I think if she learned about his involvement in helping her and who he too hate the fatui and has suffered at their hands. She'd cry.

Dehya

As a Claymore Pyro, (on standard) I think Dehya already feel a connection. And she would love swapping stories with him until she realizes how young he is.

And then she'd probably ask about how he keeps his skin looking so nice. He would shrug and just say he washes regularly.

Then it hits her

He's not even 25 yet he's barely 23.

Big sister mode kicks in and she picks him up toss him over her shoulder. This her now. her little brother and if anything happen to him she will kill everyone and then herself.

Dori

So these two are probably the ones most likely to have canon interaction. And Dori has absolutely tried to sell counterfeit dandelion wine.

And well.

Dori has probably the personally see Diluc's pretty close to bottomless assets. The ability to by like what was it 2000? fake Breath of Barbatos. Either way she sees him as someone she can't really cross without facing a lose in some way, and he's not one who she can trick. So she admires him in some way for how he's added to his family's wealthy but also in some was see him as a rival for having family wealthy and still being a good businessman.

Faruzan

Diluc actually calls her Madam and gives her the elder respect that she asks for. So she loves him and probably has tried to get him to become a student specially since I do think Diluc would have an interests in linguistics particularly in syphers and codes.

She probably would be his got to for such things relating to machines and langue. And honestly Diluc would personally fund her projects seeing that her lines and interests in blending fields of study could have long term good effects for everyone.

Kaveh

So I'm a big Kavehluc person.

And Kaveh would instantly see Diluc's beauty and just fall head over heels and just progressively get worst because he'd see Diluc on top of being beautiful is one of the gentlest and sweetest people he's every meet. Kaveh would admire him because he just gives himself and knows when to hold back with out feeling any of the guilt that Kaveh struggles with.

And even if you don't ship them I feel they would get along as Kaveh feels he could learn something from Diluc.

Layla

So Diluc's not an astrology person. But I feel he's treat Layla the same was he does Sucrose. He would be extra gentle and try to subtly build up Layla's confidences. Which would put him in high regards in "other" Layla's book.

If he meet them both he would tries his best to meet the real Layla which he thinks is some point in-between day and night time Layla.

Nahida

Not give a single shit she's an archon.

That's a baby.

And Diluc has a biiiiiiig soft spot for children. Defiantly respects her wisdom but defiantly is in big bro mode.

Nilou

RED HEADS.

But I get the feeling that Nilou is like Amber and that she has a "grump" translator. Meaning when Diluc says something that might come across as "Blunt" at best She instantly knows what he means. And she instantly knows how kind and sweet he is.

There defiantly is at small group of Nilou, Dehya, Diluc, and Candace all swapping skin, hair and general beauty tips.

Tighnari

So Tighnari is the Sumeru Rep of the Bully the Fatui Brigade. And I think Tighnari would eventually learn what Diluc did for Collie. So There is a lot of respect between them. And A lot of low key chaos

A little Less when Tighnari learns Diluc acutely like Cyno's Jokes.

Wanderer

I'm not really a fan. But I feel like Diluc wouldn't be intimated by Wanderer at all. And Wanderer would be super duper leery knowing about Diluc's past.

But Diluc doesn't remember Wander but Wander would be sort of curious about this side of the feared Fatui hunter. Defiantly would probably try to get one his good side for his own revenge related reason. Enemy of my enemy all that.

FONTAINE

Colrinde

So there isn't a lot info on her yet for me to make a call. But I feel they would have a generally positively sort of respectful relationship. Not a lot more tho.

Freminet

Into the kid collection he goes. He likes all his kids Diluc would be extremely gently and patient with Ferminet. Defiantly giving him claymore tips and probably even recommending he talk to Eula because there could be lines crossed between swimming and dancing that could be used to help him.

Diluc probably has a general soft spot for Cyro users just because of Keaya so ya know.

Furina

So consider she's just Fischl on steroids. Diluc would probably end up treating her like he does Fischl. Just gently playing into what makes her happy but also drawing clear lines when she's over stepping or about to overstep.

Diluc already has experience pulling in his archon, and given his own sense of justice I feel he and Furina would generally get along great up untill he wounds her pride, but he'd only every do it when she's being too much.

Neuvillette sings Diluc's praises for this.

Lynette

Just like with Al Haitham.

Autism to Autism communication.

Lynette would be totally see similarities between Diluc and Lyney as they are both brother would try and take all the burden away from their siblings and do everything they can protect them. So Lynette would look out for Diluc probably ends up giving Kaeya a care list for Diluc because I totally think she has one for how she takes care of Lyney when he's not looking. Not to her suprise Kaeya already has one.

Lyney

OK OK OK.

Lyney and Diluc are generally the more calm and collected end of the Pyro spectrum. But I get the feeling they both would just bring out their inner Chaos.

Like Yeah both Lyney and Lynette have heard about Diluc's Fatui Hunting. But I also think that Diluc would have tried to liberate House of Hearth and find better places for Kids. If not give them more supplies and more of a childhood. Because the he would learn of the House of Hearth and I think It's where Diluc would start to waiver on his conviction which would lead to him seeing how his method wasn't working.

So despite being Fatui Diluc would still treat them well and I feel he'd love Lyney's stage magic and learning all the tricks. It would be a puzzle game between them Lyney performs a trick and Diluc tries to figure out how he did it.

Navia

So Navia I feel could probably be the best candidate to be add to the detective club.

And there would be a lot of trauma bonding with her and Diluc over losing their father before taking up their mantles. So again I feel Diluc would provide funding to Spina di Rosula specially since the info they gain could be usfull to the Detective club or Diluc's underground organization.

Navia might even be an apprentice to Diluc but I acutely sort of get the vibe that she's older, but she's still have a lot of respect for his experience and general attitude. while he admires her passion for doing what is right and seeking the truth against all odds.

Neuvillette

So I've already seen art of Diluc and Neuvillette together and they are like super cute and chill vibes.

Like I don't have the best grip on Neuvillette yet but I feel like he and Diluc would get along in that they generally are pretty vibing but at the same time Neuvillette could learn a lot form Diluc as Diluc's passion for justice as well as being a generally passionate person would give Neuvillette a lot more perspective while not overwhelming him.

But also that leak about the Dark knight hero line. It would add a lot of spicy and also questions to the realtionship

Sigewinne

New daughter.

That's all I got mostly because see below.

Wriothesley

Look man this is gonna be my new addition to the Diluc Harem. Like I just get the gay Jane Austin Vibes from these two. Like if you want regency romance Wrioluc will be your thing. But that's just the vibe I'm picking up right now. I am super excited to learn more.

[kiuda]

Ki my beloved

Dream finds the will one day <3

He sure does dear El!!! :D

(Sorry for any mistakes, I am typing this on my phone with no autocorrect ^^')

warnings: none i think :D

/rp /dsmp

Dream was alone in the cabin. It wasn't a new occurrence - he has been with the Syndicate for months now and it was impossible for them to always be there. They all had their own lives to tend to after all.

He used to blame himself for taking so much of their time. For being a burden. But they explained to him as many times as he needed it - he was part of their family. Family is not a burden.

He was even starting to believe them!

They actually wanted him there. They wanted to listen to him ramble about whatever he wanted. They didn't mind if one day was worse than others and he was hiding in his room. They welcomed him the next day like nothing happened. They were there when he woke up from his nightmares. They cared.

He trusted them. Actually trusted them.

So maybe that's why the will made him feel so conflicted.

On one hand: Ranboo and Niki. Two people that proved to be extremely strong, both in battle and in will. Dream has noticed the looks Ranboo still keeps giving him, no matter how much time he has been with the Syndicate. He is dangerous. Ranboo is nice, but only until you threaten his family.

And of course he has seen Niki fight. She is a beast on the battlefield. Quick, hitting opponents with precise moves. But she is also just intimidating. He has never seen anyone else make Techno do anything he didn't want to do as quickly as Niki can.

They are both strong, just like the will says.

The message to Phil didn't surprise him either.

Phil and Techno share a special bond, unmatched by anyone else. They don't need to speak to understand each other. Their relationship much more than a friendship. They are family.

And then there was the part for Tommy.

Tommy. The person, who Dream had a lot of history with. Some good, some bad. Mostly bad. Dream regretted that he felt he had no other choice. He thought his end goal justified his actions. It didn't. He knew that now. But he still couldn't look Tommy in the eyes. He wasn't brave enough.

'I am going to visit Dream and make sure he is alright.'

Dream felt his eyes water. Techno cared. Even then, he actually cared about him. He wasn't going to check what he wanted or what the prison was like. He wanted to make sure Dream was alright.

'If I do not return within a few days, activate the pearl I left in our book club's meeting room. If the pearl is gone, well, it was nice knowing you. Look after the others for me when I'm gone.'

Techno... Techno knew he could not return. He knew it could be a trap. And he still... he still went to check on him... Dream started tearing up, hugging the book close to him.

He knew Techno cared about him. Techno told him that many times over the last few months. But somehow seeing that written down... He cared.

Dream sniffled, getting rid of the tears flowing down with his cape. The same cape that Techno gifted him the first day he was able to step outside by himself. The cape Dream promised himself to never tear or lose. The cape that meant much more than warmth to him. It meant protection. It meant family.

[kingofdirtandnothing]

polyfacetious asked: radio Prompt Meme: (Accepting)

radio. our muses getting handsy in the car.

In the grand scheme of things, this isn’t the worst way to spend his time waiting for the mark to come to meet his mistress. But then again, the only ways that would be worse would be to stand in front of his front door with a sign that said ‘I’M HERE TO KILL YOU’ so it’s not that grand of a victory. 

But it’s the hollow bullshit one he needs to pull his phone out of the glove box and open up the incognito browser. 

Geralt tells himself that it’s all for naught. That the odds of him being at “work” at the same time as Geralt was slim to none. 

Which was all well and good, except for the fact that the little red notification bubble at the top of the screen was flashing, and when Geralt clicked on it, he was met with Jaskier is live!!

“Fuck.”

No amount of mental gymnastics would change the fact that he was clicking on the link before any amount of thought could sink in, and the top third of Geralt’s screen filled with the white wall of a bedroom and Jaskier, propped up against a mountain of pillows, idly strumming the guitar in his lap. 

Jaskier was a fucking vision, with smudged eyeliner and chest hair that rose above the tank top he was wearing. And--much to Geralt’s disappointment--hair that was wet with sweat and sticking to his cheeks. Which meant Geralt had missed the naked part of the show. 

Well, you know how it is. When the muse takes you, you... 

Jaskier’s bright eyes flicker to the corner of the screen. There must be some sort of sound when someone logs on. But beyond that, he doesn’t stop his ramblings about musing and love. 

Geralt had chosen this platform because he needed anonymity. His life wouldn’t make room for anything else. And the first few shows he’d been content to jerk himself off without paying a cent more than the monthly fee he paid for the account, and the “entry fee” for Jaskier’s chat room. 

It was a farce of privacy, a way to enjoy the sight of a beautiful man and his near constant ramblings, to let it fill up the silence in Geralt’s life. It was pathetic, is what it was. But Geralt has never been good at the bits before the fucking, and this was simpler. 

At least, that’s what he told himself. 

“I’m not doing this.” The pretty face on the other end of the video connection didn’t respond. Because it was a one way connection. Nothing to respond to. Geralt was just a name in a tiny chatbox. One of dozens, if not more. 

Jaskier (which couldn’t be a real name, but Geralt respected the veil of faux privacy enough to leave it alone) strummed something less idle, the words throaty where they spilled out of him. 

He was even better to look at when he sung. “Fuck.” Geralt’s typing before he can think better of it, hazarding a glance at the apartment building to make sure he wasn’t missing anything before he finishes the words. Of course, the man he was sent to kill didn’t have the decency to be early, and save Geralt from himself. 

‘How much for private time?’ 

There must be some sort of ping, because Jaskier’s sky blue eyes dart down, and then he lights up with a smile, turning the full force of it back onto the screen. Well, lovely G-Man, I can assure you that it’s worth every penny. 

Jaskier leans over to do his own typing, and Geralt can see his lashes. On his screen, a pop up...well...pops up with increments of time and their cost. Twenty dollars for ten minutes. Two dollars a minute. It was nothing compared to what he’d get paid for tonight’s work. 

Geralt sighs, and presses the button. 

Jaskier blows a kiss to the screen and tells the other viewers he’ll be back shortly, and to wait for him. There’s a moment or two of blank screen where Geralt is left with nothing but his own stupidity and regret, before he’s met with the sight of Jaskier again. 

He wasn’t sitting back now, he was sitting on his knees, intent and eager, gazing right into the camera. Even though Geralt knew it was impossible, it felt like that gaze was staring right into him. 

Well well. Here we are. All alone. And what will you do with me, handsome G-Man?

The username was completely stupid, and he had Yen to blame for that. But she’d paid for the first month, so...

God, he was supposed to answer. This was the part Geralt wasn’t good at. He’s never been great with people, less so with flirting. This was a mistake. An expensive one. He’s halfway to reaching up to click the ‘X’ on the screen when Jaskier speaks again.

Feeling shy, are we? That’s alright. I’ll get us started. Jaskier winked at the screen, brushing a hand down his chest. The movement was slow, and mesmerizing. Why don’t you tell me your fantasy, and I’ll do all the work. You can say it in as few words as you need. 

Geralt swears under his breath, cheeks feeling hot. He couldn’t walk away from this, not now. Not when he finally, truly had Jaskier’s attention all to himself. But his mind was overflowing with ideas. All the things he’d thought about in the shower after watching Jaskier’s show. Finally, Geralt went to the one thing he could never have. 

‘In public.’

His life was lived in the shadows, and he had to do everything he could to blend in, and not draw attention to himself. Jaskier was the opposite. He lavished the spotlight, soaked it up like a cat sunning in a window. 

In public, hm? Maybe that moan was fake. (All of this was fake, Geralt was paying for it, for fuck’s sake. But he wanted to believe, just for a little while.) But it came from low in Jaskier’s belly and echoed in the same place inside of Geralt. 

Would you fuck me where people could see, G-Man? I bet you’d make sure we put on a good show for them. You’d fill me up nice and deep, wouldn’t you? Geralt’s bitten off moan echoes through the car, and he has to reach down to adjust himself through his slacks. 

Jaskier slips just the tips of his fingers beneath his pants, watching playfully through his lashes. Would you want me to moan loud enough for everyone to hear, or would you cover my mouth?

Typing one handed has never been his strong suit, but here Geralt is, stroking himself off in a black rental car, having pretend sex with a beautiful boy who might as well be half a world away. 

‘Not cover. You could suck on my fingers’. 

Geralt has never been more grateful for autocorrect than at this moment, and he’s rewarded with another messy moan from Jaskier, who’s pulled one hand away from his pants to suck his index finger into his mouth, all the way down to the second knuckle. Mm, that’s not all I’d like to suck on, but it’s a good place to start. 

It’d be pathetic how close he is to finishing, if Geralt wasn’t paying by the minute. He pulls his hand away to spit into his palm, stripping himself in short, harsh strokes. 

He’s not a talker, never has been, but there’s some kind of magic in watching Jaskier moan and rock on his knees, still fully clothed and somehow utterly debauched. It makes him want to talk. 

‘I don’t want you over the table. I want you bouncing in my lap while people watch. Let everyone at the bar see.’

Jaskier’s blue eyes seem to darken at that, or maybe it’s a trick of the light. Tell me your name, handsome stranger. Tell me what I’ll be moaning while I fuck myself on your cock. 

He shouldn’t. It’s beyond a bad idea. His name isn’t exactly a popular one, especially in the states. But he’s lost, wrapped up in Jaskier’s voice and his pretty eyes and pretty hands, and just for a fucking second, Geralt wants to be seen. So he types those six letters with a shaking hand, and stabs ‘send’ with his thumb. 

Geralt. God, Geralt. 

It’s too much and not enough and he’s going over the edge while the timer in the corner of the screen counts two minutes and sixteen seconds remaining. Geralt curls in on himself as the waves of orgasm crash over him, and he only just happens to glance away from his phone to see a fat little man scurrying into an apartment building front door. 

“Fuck!” 

His phone drops to the floorboard as Geralt yanks his zipper back up, grabbing the gun from the center console. 

By the time Geralt washes the blood from his shoes and drops the gloves into the incinerator, all that heat in his belly has turned to ice. And when he picks up his phone out of the floorboard, stark white words flash up at him. 

Jaskier is offline. 

“...fuck.”

[xurkitips]

On Conveying Personality Through Chatroom-style Dialogue

A friend of mine shared screenshots of a roleplay he was having via a Discord server, wherein the style was chatroom/texting based. Each character would have a different style of typing completely unique to their person. Though unfamiliar with all of them, I could see what their personalities were like

Like real human beings, a character very much so has a “voice”. I mean that both in the literal sense, through their manner of speaking and what they say, but also through their self expression, interests, and actions. This carries over into the digital realm in ways we may not even notice. Text messages may not be verbal, no, but there are ways to show inflection.

There are many, many ways to show meaning through text. Here are some that I’ve picked up and utilized with my own characters:

Sentence structure

all lowercase sentences VS Grammatically correct

Lowercase gives off the feeling of someone familiar with others or willing to become familiar. It lacks the tension of formal writing, complete with its capitalization and proper periods ending sentences, and feels very casual and approachable. It may also be a sign of someone who doesn’t care much about perfection, a lazy person, or an easy going individual. Seems like a lot of internet regulars prefer this kind of typing style.

“im dying

‘deafening horrorcore rap’ ok i listen to literal noise and idk what this even is”

Using a properly capitalized and punctuated style is very formal, like one would see in a book, an official email, etc. It’s more serious and stern than lowercase is and may imply an older, more mature person typing...or maybe just someone trapped on their phone at the mercy of autocorrect. 

"I am always happy to see you, even if you are not feeling your best.“

“It's nice here.

Quiet.”

There’s a certain respectful steadiness to it as well. It can be calming to read at times.

Punctuation VS Lack of punctuation

End-stopped lines come with both a pause and a bit of a pointed and direct feeling. It strengthens both lowercase and grammatically correct styles, but in different ways. In conjunction with “proper” writing, it’s less noticeable, merely giving the reader a moment’s pause. In conjunction with lowercase, especially if the one typing isn’t keen on using periods, it can come off as stern, serious, passive-aggressive, or angry.

���whatever.

it's less excruciating than it would be without it.”

Removal of punctuation is a different story. Typically just shown with lowercase, it leaves it with that casual feeling intact, or like one’s sentences are more like quick thoughts or questions. Removing them from grammatically correct sentences does ease off some of the tension, implying someone with a more neutral-positive tone while still being more mature. 

“I’m not terribly good with conversation”

And then there’s the run-on sentences from those who type small novels per response. Usually complete with multiple and’s. It’s a sign of nervousness, enthusiasm, or oftentimes a younger character...

“actually i don't know much about it i just happened to see something online and it's apparently only manufactured overseas exclusively for this one particular shop and they made the original design and initial product i guess”

Oof.

Proper spelling (or lack thereof)

The better the spelling, the more the likelihood of the person being older, calmer, or neutral. There’s also a sense of being well educated or careful about one’s typing. Perhaps a confident air may exude from what they say, too.

“Can you come help me for a moment?”

Those who make a lot of mistakes will simply confuse words for other words, forget apostrophes, or type too fast to notice things missing or in the wrong location. Some just don’t really care enough or are too tired to deal with it. Too much focus and people know what they mean anyway. Probably.

“i laug hso hard hes come runin

he thougt i aws dyin”

It can also happen in very emotional situations, in bouts of laughter, crying, rage, or when one is drowsy, medicated, or sick. It tends to stand out when one’s style is suddenly very, very different and tips others off to something being wrong.

Younger characters, especially kids, also make spelling mistakes all the time depending on their age, whether due to sounding out words or just in a hurry to reply.

Short sentence fragments, single words, and lengthy paragraphs

Sometimes people with rapid-fire thoughts, who are excited, busy, stressed, or angry, will take to quick and short responses (sometimes of many fragments in a row). These show a similar feeling as do lines of poetry. Stacking small fragments on top of one another adds emphasis. The reader has to read them one by one rather than as a straight sentence. On its own, the word or fragment stands out and becomes more important.

"well

yeah thats

what i was tryina do

but i mean”

I’ve seen it used used for storytelling from one person to another in larger chunks of things, quick responses, for poetic value, and in irritation or passive-aggressiveness.

In full sentence conversations sent in short bursts, it’s also allowing the reader pause to read each comment without it feeling like a novella. Though it can also feel like someone is obnoxious, rambling on and on as the notifications keep coming, or has a lot to talk about and keeps thinking of more.

Then there are those who type rather large responses all at once instead of hitting the enter key with every sentence:

"Whoever did it was quite thorough; either the power in that area of the lab was cut while we were distracted or they tampered with the security cameras, because that footage is missing. But, we have some theories now. It had to have been someone with direct access to the laboratory. I hesitate to place blame on any of my coworkers...they're all my trusted companions and friends! And yet...”

It’s concise and a solid, complete story in one spot. Could be someone who loves to talk, could be someone who didn’t want a response before they were done talking. It’s also commonly seen by middle-aged texters who want to say everything they can all at once.

Exclamation points and Question marks

Simple one here. Question mark for a question or confusion, exclamation point for emphasis or an exclamation. But when a person adds multiple to a sentence it can convey more of the person’s feelings; 

“are you okay??”

Here is someone who is very concerned. Multiple question marks can imply things such as worry, stress, disbelief, and shock. There’s a sense of hurry and tension. Perhaps the person on the other end is frightened, easily afraid, or tends to have an overwhelming reaction to things.

“oh!!! it’s nice to see you!!!”

"! 

!!! 

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

Meanwhile, multiple exclamation points convey much more friendlier, happier tones. Often such things as surprise, excitement, happiness, friendliness. Users typing !! as a punctuation (like I tend to do) may do it as an assurance or to show how thrilled they are to talk. Occasionally !!!! is tacked onto an angry statement to be more of a shout, but I see it less and less.

Chatspeak and Internet habits

Shortenings of words have been a regular thing for ages. It’s easy, convenient, and gets the point across quickly. But the internet has taken it to a new extreme, where sentences can be almost entirely compromised of them.

“wtf r u talkin abt?? gdi man idk wuts even happening rn”

A character wanting to be quick to respond, always on the ball, always involved, may be more likely to utilize and understand chatspeak. They’re the social butterfly of the group. It’s also a sign of a long-time internet lurker who’s aware of what the lingo is, and how to use it. A complete lack thereof points toward either an older user or someone who’s unused to social media.

The more memes, the harder someone is trying to fit in. Or maybe they’re easily amused or just absorbed things from their friends without thinking about it. The comedian of the group is going to know the best ways to use them.

Smilies and Emojis

:D D: :DDD // :3 3: >:3 :3c // :o :O O:<

These kinds of smilies have always struck me as the most friendly. Whether used in devious ways or with genuinely heartwarming intentions, the playful, lightheartedness of the user really shines through these. 

"not a bad way to spend a lazy day :D”

“it's also my birthday :3″

It’s got just the right vibe to punctuate a sentence that’ll leave the reader feeling that the person likely means no harm or wants to be friendly, positive, or encouraging. I’ve met a lot of people that use these and turn out to be very kind or considerate people.

:), ;), ((((: and related

A long time positive, friendly smiley. 

"You said you've known them a long time? I think they would understand. :)”

And yet these days I tend to associate it with passive aggressive statements, plotting, slyness, devious behavior, or anger. Older users may be inclined to use :) as a means to show their emotional state, but newer users seem more inclined to do the opposite. The more parentheses there are, the more upset the person, it seems.

“man don’t u love it when the power’s out in the middle of the night it’s just (((: really great thanks (((((:”

Then the ;) smiley comes off more specifically flirty and a bit playful. Doesn’t seem to change much there.

“if i find a good chance 2 hook u up ill do my best ;)”

XD

The bane of my teenage existence. It’s a more old school sign of laughter, rarely seen in today’s world due to falling out of favor and becoming associated with, “LOL Rawr XD Tacos I’m So Randoom,” culture. But time to time you do see it. Mostly with sarcasm but sometimes with genuine intentions.

“xDddddDDD

It was a good joke. XD”

A character using it genuinely comes off more playful, and to me, personally, as an older person who’s genuinely unaware of the associations with the smiley itself trying to show how they laughed without using LOL. 

Letter/Character smilies

Y’know, things like .w. and ._. or owo, where the letters or symbols make a face. These are fairly popular, it seems. I don’t like using them myself, but know a few who do use them.

"I'm sorry that they can be mean qmq”

It’s a different feel from the others. There’s something soft to it, almost a gentleness. When these or Japanese characters are used, there’s more whimsy. It’s cute and almost a bit feminine. It may convey an open person or give the impression that said person is easier to talk to.

Though honestly I can’t see uwu and owo as anything but heavily sarcastic. I’ll be honest with you.

Emojis

The first rule of Xurkitips club is that we don’t talk about Emoji Movie. Just putting that out there riiight now.

Used sparingly by most for fun and for emphasis. Characters may use them to be lighthearted, aesthetically, joke, or to make a conversation more flavorful. The use of emojis may determine a character’s personality; I find that characters who use hand emojis like 👌 are rather laid back, those who use 🙃 do it passive aggressively, and we all know what kind of person uses 🍆.

Then there’s what in common terms known as, “The DudeBro”:

[MFKNSTARBOI]: the thing i never undstood about hair is why people buy shampoo like regular soap not good enough for you LMAO 😂😂😂

[gostones]: .

[BIGDICKTOYOTA69]: what the fuck man

[ahogekun]: do... you not use shampoo

[MFKNSTARBOI]: aaaah you guys got sucked into big shampoo as well 😔

[MFKNSTARBOI]: When it comes to horses 🐎  the stars in the sky ✨ or just man to man no bullshit advice 👬 IM youre guy 😤😂

I think this one speaks for itself.

[dilutedd]

here’s a list of popular/common users who are aphobes so those of us who don’t want to platform them can avoid them

or in other words, I see these guys casually on posts a lot and want you all who are reblogging them to know they are aphobes (and some of them have done worse yet, such as abuse, rape apologism, transphobia, being anti sj, racism, etc)

tw for: ableism, abuse, abuse apologism, biphobia, body shaming, child sexual abuse, cissexism, conversion therapy, death/violent threats, fatphobia, gaslighting, homophobia, intersexism, lesbophobia, misgendering, pedo apologism, pedophilia, queerphobia, racism, radfems/terfs/swerfs, rape, rape apologism, sex shaming, sexism, sexual abuse, sexual harassment, suicide baiting, transphobia, truscum, whorephobia

edit Last updated: 12/11/2017

[edit] fun fact: I am trans and queer!! thanks for the misgendering, misidentifying, threats, constant use of misogynistic slurs, and suicide bait!

(will exclusionists ever stop misgendering inclusionists and calling them the b-slur? the world may never know)

[edit] Honestly this has now become just a general list of aphobes for people to block, not necessarily specifically of people I “see a lot” that people don’t know about. So with that in mind, here’s an extension that lets you block a list of people at once. (edit: link fixed, sorry!) Unfortunately, it’s only for Google Chrome and I’m not sure if there are other versions out there for other browsers.

[edit] Latest additions, so people can keep track of updates: cadaverjones, captainfunkpunkandroll, captainprism, chainsawpunk, cherryseltzer, chloepricekin, chunke, cisphobepapyrus, clara-the-slytherin-graduate, clarith, clusterc, commanderlotus, commuwuism, confused-alien-on-earth, constowllation, corrgii, courtneyhammett, cozybears, crash-bandisloot, crawlybug, crunchydude, cuckmobile, cybernetyx, cyberni, depechemodemutual, peppermint-dyke, reindeer-ritsu, romansilver, wikdsushi

[edit] Other block lists to take note of: Pedo apologist list and list of other shitty inclusionists, list of anti-sj, anti-feminists, terfs, truscum, and their apologists

[edit] Previous versions of this list. Keep in mind these may contain users that have been removed.

[edit4] Aphobic as in,

don’t believe aro/aces are LGBT+,

don’t think aphobia is real, don’t think ace/aro pride is needed and/or that it is homophobic, don’t think aro/ace issues should be discussed,

think asexuality and aromanticism aren’t real, are “just modifiers”, are “just internalized homophobia”, and/or are fake “special snowflake” identities,

or worse, that aspecs need to be medically/psychologically examined - that being aspec is or is a symptom of a medical disorder or mental illness,

think asexuality just means someone doesn’t like or have sex,

don’t think we should educate about asexuality,

think minors can’t be aspec,

think the A is for “ally” which is particularly ironic while arguing aces don’t belong because they’re “cishet invaders”

think asexuality and/or aromanticism is pedophilia, homophobic, inherently abusive, or nsfw, etc

believe having sex without attraction is bad, mentally ill, abusive, rape, etc (just in general a lot of sex-shaming shit that often pulls in whorephobia), or even think aspecs can’t or shouldn’t date

often don’t even think you can be gay/etc and ace, and make sweeping statements against asexuality in general, so “lgbt aces” is a bunch of lying shit

make and support numerous lies regarding the discourse, such as that MOGAI was “coined by a pedophile” or that aspec was “stolen from autistics”

And most of them are biphobic, such as believing biphobia doesn’t exist, using phrases like “bihet”, and hating on “”””new”””” or “”””fake”””” identities in general, which means many are truscum/anti-nonbinary/exorsexist as well (fun fact: truscum came up with this “the mogais” shit btw), and most of them believing in “straight/cis passing” privilege

And tend to have a habit of shitting on people who identify as queer, or even imply or directly say nobody is allowed to ID as queer, as well as a habit of intersexism on top of that. Many also think it’s inherently homophobic to be triggered or uncomfortable by general pda and related content, including sexually explicit content (there’s generally a lot of anti-survivor and anti-sex repulsed bs).

Annnnd a lot of the cis here keep using “cishet” which is not their fucking word to use! because they have cis privilege! they are not oppressed by cis people! And a lot of them speak over trans people or outright try to educate us about what is “really” transphobic in the discourse. And the amount of misgendering is extreme, if the above big and bold part didn’t indicate that well enough.

Just look at my damned discourse tag ffs.

That being said of course if you see someone on here who is additionally abusive, an assailant, a radfem/truscum, etc, feel free to mention it. Blogs like @regreceipts and @aphobehallofshame and @justaphobethings​ has quite a lot of posts on these people (and others) saying awful things and being nasty.

[edit] Due to the increased harassment, transphobia, and threats, I am now auto-blocking everyone added to this list. If you do NOT believe any of the above and I’ve made a mistake, you’ll have to find another way besides a message or reply to correct this.

[edit] Also, (many) people on here aren’t irredeemable, there have been cases of people changing and being removed from here. There’s also the case of when someone else (often unrelated) takes over the URL and gets removed from here. If that happens, let me know… but again because of the abuse, these blogs are autoblocked, so you’ll have to find a way around that.

[edit5] “Why are there deactivated people on here?”

because regardless of deactivation their posts still exist and their comments on others’ posts also still exist, so, people who don’t want to give aphobes a platform should avoid those posts, that’s the point of this list

0829z

0nlyskeletonbcnesremain

16bitdiscourse (also threatens physical violence on aces for coming out)

343-guiltyspark / x2013x (also a terf and makes posts about violently attacking trans people)

37q

3amstims

3coursemeal

410940

4lung

6-/-6-6 (remove / for blocking purposes, tumblr autocorrects it to a longer dash)

6c415f (also a terf and biphobe)

6juggernaut

8bitprincex

9-lovs (also a terf and pedo apologist)

96galdeco

999twink

9enj1

a-bit-of-luck-and-a-lot-of-hunk

a-phobia

aawb (also a terf, doesn’t believe in biphobia, doesn’t believe that refusing to date or befriend bi people is biphobic, and believes that bi women are privileged over lesbians)

abigots

abracababra / discourspicy

accelgors (also biphobic)

ace-aro-spectrum-ppl-can-b-str8

ace-bpd-sangwoo

ace-cringe

ace-discourse-attorney

ace-tears

acecommunityreceipts (also claims aces can’t be raped for being ace)

acediscourse-central

acediscourseconsumer

acediscoursehalloffame

acediscourselesbian

acediskhorse

acenvy

aceoppression (also believes calling trans people cishets isn’t misgendering)

acephobeon

acephobia101 (also believes sex ed shouldn’t be taught to children and that you can’t know you’re ace until you’re a teen)

acephobiafreediscourse (also defended discourseprincesa (see below) and protested her outing)

acephobiaisajoke / gonnadeleteafter (also a rape apologist)

acepom

acetungldotcom (also suicide baits; wishes death on aces)

aceslation / lesbiandiscordblog (also blames Ace Tumblr TM for lesbian porn)

acevorese

acting-lesbianistically

aceslayertrannie

acetungle

acewlws

achievement-hunter

acoupleofradfems (also a terf)

actualaphobe

adlernotes

[promptsandpremises]

Jan 4

Thinking about the possible ramifications of trying to say “you never fail to amaze” and “you never disappoint” at the same time and accidentally saying “you never fail to disappoint.” 

If you say that to someone in person, you have a few seconds to fit that- people make mistakes while speaking all the time, and hopefully your friend will recognize that too. If you can quickly laugh it off together, no harm is done. The more you play up yourself as the butt of the joke, the better. After a few days, it’s likely neither of you will even remember it. 

If you send that over text, though, you might be seriously screwed. You can’t blame that one on autocorrect, and texting gives you the chance to review your message before sending it. The likelihood of your phrasing seeming like a mistake is much lower than in person. But to be fair, the likelihood of you messing this up over text is also lower. This hypothetical is actually pretty useless given how unlikely this situation is to occur. 

Whatever. These are my words for the day. They don’t have to be important, or even pretty, I just need to practice writing them.

[joons-expensive-gurl]

I Left

Here's a little story about me for anyone who's really interested. I wanted to post this here because I truly feel that this message is so so so important. So, I've had friends on Kik for around 4 years now. That's a long time. We were all very, very close, and a lot of things have happened. My first boyfriend is among that group, my first best friends, a lot of firsts for me are in that group. But that doesn't necessarily mean they're nice people. My oldest friend of the lot has always been horrible to me. We love each other, but we always argue. At first, it was because I was dating his best friend and taking their time away, and then it was because we'd broke up, and then we'd argue over everything. It was a very stressful situation for me, always bickering with him, and I'd constantly find myself deleting my kik for a day or two to cool down before coming back. We'd be friendly, something would kick off, we'd argue, I'd leave, and it would all happen again. Over and over. This was a vicious cycle, and I refuse to take part in it anymore, especially after what he did to me a few weeks ago. My closest friend of the lot, she's never done anything to me. I love her as if she is my own sister, we're so close. However, she's never able to come online due to school and other issues, and consequently, I find myself ranting to her, with no replies or help. It's not her fault; not at all, but I will not put her into a position anymore where she's in the middle of arguments. It isn't fair on her after 4 years. The other girl, I've never really liked. She's a good person, however, since she developed feelings for my ex, I've found myself liking her less and less. It has nothing to do with jealousy or anything like that, it's because she's becoming me. She talks the same way I do (liek dis to da group. Which Ik is rly bad grammar n shit n she used to hav her own style but nao it's the same as dis), her favourite colour is suddenly pink (my favourite), she's dyeing her hair in the summer, just like what I've been doing for two years straight, she's trying to be me, to secure his heart, and it upsets me a lot for a lot of reasons. I hate being copied in any way. I haven't lived my life being different to everyone else for someone to come and steal my individuality, I don't like the way she's portraying herself as the me he fell in love with, and not who I am today, because that reminds me that I can never have him again, and he was by far the best boyfriend I had. I hate the fact that she will do anything to tell us that she doesn't have feelings for him. We've asked. It's always the same "he's my brother figure". Then stop bringing him up when it's not necessary, don't ignore us for him in group chats, leave him alone because he isn't interested half the time. She's become a girl I can't stand. She's become the old me. A me I never ever want to go back to. And I hate being reminded of my past self every time I have to speak to her. The second guy, I used to love. A lot. When we met, he instantly had feelings for me, but I was with my ex at the time, and I had to leave him heartbroken. But after we broke up, he was there for me, treated me like a princess and I found myself liking him more and more every day. When he found out I liked him, he was shocked. The main reason being he had been leading me on, whilst having a secret girlfriend none of us knew about. I was livid, I was furious with him, but he broke up with her to be with me. This was his worst mistake. Every day, from the day we got together until the day we broke up, his ex girlfriend and her best friend bullied me so severely. They told me to kill myself multiple times. At least 30 times a day I'd receive the message "kill yourself" in one form or another. I cried to him, I begged him to make it stop, but he didn't. And I ended up breaking up with him because of it. A week later, and he was back with her. We were okay up until the election last year, to which he confessed he was voting for Trump. I don't think I've ever been so angry or disappointed in a person in all my life. I argued with him for weeks, I told him over and over that if he voted for that asshat, I would never speak to him again. I told him that he couldn't do this to the world. That Trump would destroy the peace. What he said to me will forever haunt me. He told me he just wanted the "dirty immigrants" out of his country and his guns safe. I left kik for a few months after that. When I came back, we were okay until I decided to leave again. I got into an argument a few days before I planned on leaving, in which we were again arguing over Trump. He was attacking my best friend and I was attacking him for hurting her. He used the word "chinks" on accident, claiming that it was autocorrect. I told him that that proved how much he was using racial slander and I stopped talking to him. On the day I left, I sent him a message saying I was angry, but goodbye and I still had some lingering feelings for him. All he said was "bye" and told me he'd been playing hard to get. We don't talk anymore. The final one, who is going to make my heart break as I write about this, is my ex. I loved him from the second we met. I still remember. It was awkward, but it was great to finally have friends. I remember the day we got together and everything was so happy. Some girls bullied me while I was with him, but he protected me from them and told them that he wouldn't ever like them if they continued to hurt me. I loved him. I really loved him. But I messed things up, and we broke up. And I hated myself for so long. Then a new best friend for me came into the picture. It was only a few months because after all the things I told her about how I still loved him, she told me she'd been dating him behind my back. I stopped talking to them both for a long time. And then, things began to go back to normal. We were talking again, we were happy being in each other's company. Until he told me that he liked this girl I've never met. My heart shattered and I remember I had to leave college early because of the amount of hurt I was in. I was under the impression I had no feelings left for him. I was wrong. I cried so much, I asked my best friend about this girl and learnt she was horrible to him. She told him she would kill herself because of him. She blamed him for everything. She was and still is awful to him. I told my first friend there about the problem. Who then told my ex about the feelings I still have for him. I left kik again, and came back with no messages from anyone. I'd been abandoned. I'd ruined all my friendships. Only a few messages from my best friend, asking if I was okay. That was it. No one else. So last night, I said my final goodbye to her. I told her how I'd slowly demolished all my friendships with all of them, and how leaving her behind would hurt so much but she'd be better without me. I deleted my kik, I blocked them on any other social media I have, and I'm going to move on. This is just a very small reconstruction of everything that has ever happened between us. There have been friends come and gone, exes, jealous people, disgusting people, but we were the ones who stuck together. We fought alongside each other, without realising we were fighting against one another. I'm no longer friends with them. I will no longer have contact with them. I will no longer be hurting by the toxic friendships of two ex boyfriends, a racist, a girl who wants too badly, and the one who finally drove me out. I will no longer be the toxic person for my best friend. I loved them all. I am grateful for the lessons they taught me. I will forever thank them for being my friends in my darkest days. But I will never forget he message they left on me. That you must cut out toxic relationships, no matter how much they mean to you. You can survive without the negativity, and without the positives, you can, and you must cut out toxic people. That includes cutting yourself away from them, if you're toxic, too.