#call me insane call me a bitch I don't care but I'm really tired of media illiteracy due to/under the guise of queer shipping

[myheartisbro-ken]

I was gonna make a little 'how are we feeling gay people' joke after watching the finale, but I've seen some of y'all are being really bitter about it, and I do not want that negativity in my life. So if y'all cannot appreciate really cunty storytelling that actually makes sense when you pay attention to it outside of shipping goggles, I have nothing to tell you

[crownmemes]

Mean Sentences, Vol. 7

(Mean sentences from various sources. Adjust phrasing where needed)

"Look at you; relieved you didn't disappoint. That's a weakness."

"It really does suck being you, doesn't it?"

"You're incapable of human connection, so you want everyone to be like you!"

"How did they manage to get so many snobs in one place?"

"I liked you better when you were dying."

"Can I ask you a question? Are you insane or just stupid?"

"You're a collection of impeccable, elaborate masks in orbit of a stunted heart."

"You truly are pathetic."

"I am disappointed. I should have thought that you would have devised something more original."

"Were you born heartless, or did the job make you like this?"

"My professional and personal view is that you are poison."

"I want you to listen to me because I think you've needed to hear this your whole life. You aren't a good person."

"Can you comprehend even for one second that this is not about you?"

"Nobody wanted to work with you. Nobody wants to work with you now."

"Nobody will ever love you in the way he loves me."

"You've got friends?"

"No, I'm not okay, but that doesn't mean I need anything from you."

"I don't care about you. Not anymore."

"You're cute, but you're not that cute."

"You really have no decency, do you?"

"You're a hard, callous bitch! You're just using me!"

"Whatever gave you the impression that I was remotely interested in your private life?"

"Human? You don't deserve to be human."

"Why should I help you? What have the likes of you ever done to help the likes me?"

"I'd call you an idiot again, but at this point I'm starting to doubt whether you understand what I mean by the word."

"Have you any idea how ridiculous you sound?"

"You are a precocious boy who is perhaps ashamed at how much he likes attention."

"I detest you more than you could ever know."

"When have you ever had a lasting relationship?"

"Your ego is astounding."

"Everyone was right; you're not very nice to know."

"You're nothing but a goddamn coward!"

"You're so banal. In fact, you're so banal it's almost a talent!"

"You're a monster, you know that?"

"Your lack of understanding does not obligate me to explain."

"It's hard to find something in a man who rejects people as much as you do, you know that?"

"You don't belong here. You never belonged here."

"You were doing so well. Now you're being simply foolish."

"Don't you ever get tired of hearing yourself talk?"

"Of all the lies people tell themselves, I bet that's the most common."

[sorry-moots]

Foot-in-the-Door Technique

“Foot-in-the-door technique is a compliance tactic that aims at getting a person to agree to a large request by having them agree to a modest request first.”

just something short for bakugou while i work on chapter 12 of my ongoing series description: ua is a college level school, all characters are 18+, reader is implied to have a quirk, quirk is not specified characters featured: bakugou cws: language, bakugou calls reader a dumbass bitch, mention of death but it's just a joke wc: 598

Bakugou loves to show off, so it’s easy to get him to do stuff for you. All you have to do is make yourself seem as pitiful as possible. It’s actually insane how well this works.

"Bakugouu, can you open this bottle for me?" you'd ask with a small pout and the slightest furrow of your brow. "I don’t have the grip strength for it." "Fine, give it here, extra."

"Bakugouuuuu, can you take the staples out of this packet? I stapled the papers in the wrong order and I can’t find a staple remover." "Watch what you're doing next time," he'd grumble as he picked out the staples.

"Bakugou!" you'd call out, running up behind him. "Can you heat up my tea? I didn’t have time to drink it during class and now it’s cold." "Maybe if you had a useful quirk, you wouldn't need to ask for help all the time."

"Bakugouuuuuuuu, can you carry my bag? The strap broke and it’s really heavy." "Take better care of your stuff!" (He's too busy scolding you to notice the oddly clean tear in the strap.)

"Bakugouuuuuuuuuuu, can you tell your friends to shut up? My head hurts." This is his favorite of your requests. "OI, ALL YOU FREAK SHOWS, SHUT UP! (Y/N) HAS A HEADACHE!" Maybe not the best way to go about it.

"Bakugouuuuuu, can you make me something for lunch? They don’t have anything good in the cafeteria today." "Obviously those good-for-nothings don't cook as well as I do. Wait here."

Everyone would always ask Bakugou if he was ever going to ask you out. They all said it was clear you liked him. "(Y/n) asking me for favors doesn’t mean she likes me! Just means she’s too damn pathetic to do anything for herself."

He refused to accept that you liked him, even when your requests became a little more questionable.

"Bakugouuuuuuuuuuuuu, can I borrow your jacket? I’m really cold." "What happened to 'a hoe neva gets cold'?" he mocks you with air quotes before slipping off his jacket.

"Bakugouuuu, my back hurtsssss, can you rub my shoulders?" "Dumbass bitch doesn't know how to lift with her legs."

"Bakugouuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu, can you carry me to the dorms? My feet are sore." "Well, my ears are sore from listening to you whine all the time. Now, princess or piggyback?"

The entirety of UA was at its breaking point. They couldn't tell if Bakugou was playing dumb or just plain stupid. Still, you were determined.

"Bakugouuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu, can I spend the night in your dorm? The heat stopped working in mine and I think I might die of hypothermia in my sleep." "Goddamn, woman, at least call me by my name!" "Katsuki..?" "What." "Can you ask me out? I'm really tired of waiting." It was hard to hide the flush that tinted his ears red. "Fine, where do you wanna go."

He takes you to an amusement park to ride the bumper cars! Violence is his religion <3

The next day (and no you did not stay the night), when he looks for you in the cafeteria, he finds you... opening a sealed bottle.

"THIS WHOLE TIME YOU COULD OPEN YOUR OWN BOTTLES?!" "Well, yeah, I'm not a baby." "Then, why--" he starts, but falls quiet and silently fumes as the realization dawns on him. "You're so cute when you're realizing you've been manipulated," you remark with a fond smile.

You stand up and close the distance between the two of you. Leaning in, you kiss one of his blazing red cheeks and whisper, "It's called the foot-in-the-door-technique."

a/n: this is your reminder to lift with your LEGS not your back

[fizzyeggg]

i should really actually post my art on this site either way i'll still answer this lol

1. ms paint, used to use it before i moved to aseprite, paint.net kinda counts but i do use it sometimes because the magic wand tool in it is cool

2. left or right is equally easy for me, but forward? hhGRGAAAAAAAAA

3. i like to remaster a lot of really really old drawings i made on ms paint (because i got a computer wayyyy too early), only one i can think of off the top of my head is the mushroom guys

4. humans are just bitches to draw in general. hate those things

5. i keep literally all of it to myself

6. adventure time's art style tends to creep into some of my stuff, also eyes are a weird motif in a lot of my art that i just kinda throw in because it's the first cool pattern i can think of

7. sculpting man... HOW do they do that?? i've tried it before but i can't touch clay without proceeding to just squish and knead it for an hour instead of making anything of value

8. oh i got a ton of those. deltarune missing link (the discarded vessel having spooky shenanigans in the void), a deltarune swap AU i came up with where papyrus switches with susie, rouxls switches with ralsei and other stuff, deltascryption (deltarune/inscryption crossover spritecomic) so mostly deltarune stuff. sorry deltarune

9. batshit insane. i crawl to my computer like a dying rat and sift through hundreds of files titled shit like "743567hgrgh", "cheese" and "glumbo go glumbo go glumbo go" only to find the one i was looking for, titled "scrunk table" which is just a bunch of pvz fanart

10. i hate drawing clothes, but overalls are fun i guess

11. usually my playlist filled with STRANGE and EVIL music, but this board game podcast my dad listens to (called ludology) is also nice

12. most of the human body sucks but can i choose bug body parts?? a thorax or abdomen perchance?? pretty please?

13. this is hard to answer since most creators i admire are My Thing so instead i'll say My Thing is absolutely whatever the hell bep/anne and squimpus mcgrimpus' vibe is, their art is the goofiest coolest shit and i love it so so much

14. EYES EYES EYES EYES EYES EYES

15. in my cave, on the puter

16. i don't really know tbh, my motivation for anything is because it's fun

17. i mean if i happen to have food there yeah. which i usually do, and it's usually dried fruit, nuts and/or cheese because i have the diet of a pet rat

18. HAH!! GET A LOAD OF THIS GUY!!! THINKS A DIGITAL ARTIST CAN "BREAK THEIR ART SUPPLIES" HAH!!!! (i have accidentally snapped a drawing tablet in half once please don't ask)

19. impossible triangles man... i care them

20. BUGS BUGS BUGS BUGS BUGS BUGS BUGS

21. as a pixel artist i really like people who can pull off 1 bit / two colour stuff and i do want to try it at some point

22. NONE!!! (my dyspraxia grows worse by the second)

23. i have artist friends who draw normal, sane digital art and cry as they realise they've drawn on layer #7769 instead of layer #5443. they work on a new inch of their drawing and open up another layer, catapulting the total into the millions. as their tired eyes look upon me, they ask "hey how many layers do you use" my face contorts into an evil smirk "ONE" they cower and scream at my raw power

24. yeah, i probably don't notice though

25. okay... d-dwarf fortress?? it's all CHARACTERS what do they MEAN by this

26. okay so i was drawing my evil lesbian lady "Dr. E. Vile" and she has a bunch of arms with cartoon gloves on them i have no idea how five separate friends of mine said "I like her chef hat" THEY ARE GLOVES WHERE DID IT ALL GO SO WROOOONGG

27. my warm up drawings tend to be me going "time to draw the Thing", and immediately creating the most wretched abomination known to man, so abhorrent in its anatomy that i have to start over entirely

28. nope. too much pressure man WAIT I WAS IN A RAIN WORLD THING https://youtu.be/jBu7gOwtYSY?t=1628 LOOK MA I'M ON TV

29. this is a weird way to answer the question, but i DESPARATELY want to draw in a similar weird and 'unfinished' type of style that stuff like yume nikki, ENA and INTERFACE have it's just that i have no idea how to actually emulate it, like how to create that specific uncanny/eccentric vibe well

30. hahahahahahahahaha (they all are)

Weirdly Specific Artist Ask Game

Didn't see a lot of artist ask games, wanted to make a silly one.

(I wrote this while sick out of my mind last year and it's been collecting dust in my drafts, I might as well let it run free) 1. Art programs you have but don't use

2. Is it easier to draw someone facing left or right (or forward even)

3. What ideas come from when you were little

4. Fav character/subject that's a bitch to draw

5. Estimate of how much of your art you post online vs. the art you keep for yourself

6. Anything that might inspire you subconsciously (i.e. this horse wasn't supposed to look like the Last Unicorn but I see it)

7. A medium of art you don't work in but appreciate

8. What's an old project idea that you've lost interest in

9. What are your file name conventions

10. Favorite piece of clothing to draw

11. Do you listen to anything while drawing? If so, what

12. Easiest part of body to draw

13. A creator who you admire but whose work isn't your thing

14. Any favorite motifs

15. *Where* do you draw (don't drop your ip address this just means do you doodle at a park or smth)

16. Something you are good at but don't really have fun doing

17. Do you eat/drink when drawing? if so, what

18. An estimate of how much art supplies you've broken

19. Favorite inanimate objects to draw (food, nature, etc.)

20. Something everyone else finds hard to draw but you enjoy

21. Art styles nothing like your own but you like anyways

22. What physical exercises do you do before drawing, if any

23. Do you use different layer modes

24. Do your references include stock images

25. Something your art has been compared to that you were NOT inspired by

26. What's a piece that got a wildly different interpretation from what you intended

27. Do you warm up before getting to the good stuff? If so, what is it you draw to warm up with

28. Any art events you have participated in the past (like zines)

29. Media you love, but doesn't inspire you artistically

30. What piece of yours do you think is underrated

[sincelastsession]

I literally just want to run away and I'm a grown adult

I feel like a hurt child right now and all I want to do is go home but there is no home to go home to

It hurts so much

And I feel like I'm going insane because everybody outside is so fucking loud everything is overwhelming and loud and I don't want to deal with it anymore

And this is the time of year everything gets worse for me bubecause I start to have more anxiety and panic and other issues this time of year and my parents know that this happens every year until about my birthday or thanksgiving time

But they don't care

Their heads are so stuck up their own asses it's ridiculous and then they bitch at me about how I don't know what's going on in their life well they don't fucking tell me about it how am I supposed to know otherwise

It's complete madness and I hate this because it makes me feel like no one believes me

There have been so many times where my dad has threatened to call the coroner and lie to the coroner just so he can put me away in the hospital as punishment

Why was it swept under the rug that he and my sister attacked me and that he attacked me twice Before this while I was in my 30s still

Does he know that my nose is crooked because he fucking broke it I can't afford surgery to fix it hey broke it and I wasn't allowed to call the cops

I was not allowed I was told that if I called the cops on him or if anybody did he would lose his job and I would lose my insurance and I would lose everything and we would lose the house and that was the threat that I got in the scare tactics I got that kept me from calling for help

That was never okay

And one time he told me that if I called the cops he was gonna beat the fuck out of me Before they got there After he had already hit me

I don't know what to do Joshua

How am I supposed to communicate with my father about me getting things together and understanding what he wants me to do with my phone plan and other things and he wants to control when I'm financially stable and all this other crap when I've told him that you are doing my treatment plan and it is not his treatment plan to do with me

I lay down boundaries real ones not just I dislike your behavior so I'm gonna give you a boundary no real boundaries like you are hurting me please stop hurting me and he just comes over and hurts me more

How do I get him psychological help

Because I'm too old to call CPS

I don't know what I'm supposed to do anymore

I never wanted to be financially dependent on my parents and I can't seem to get to a point where I can be away from that and working on things on my own

He wants me to take one of the cats the other cat that was friends with the 1 that I had to put down because he and my sister abused her with neglect

How am I supposed to pay for and take care of my sister's cat that she doesn't even care about that she terrorized as a child and the other 2 cats that belong to her and my father are now hurting this cat

Everybody's going to get mad at me even though he told me to come get the cat

This is my therapy cat's brother littermate

I don't know what I'm supposed to do about that I'd really rather not have to rehome him he's terrified of everything and he knows who I am and I know that I'm not going to be screaming and causing him any sort of stress and he's a good cat

And I try to talk to my dad again and then he just starts piling information on me and completely overwhelming me and then getting mad at me when I have a symptomatic reaction to his behavior

I am tired of being so stressed out that I can't even sleep because I started communication with him again because you said it was okay

It's not okay

I don't know what else to say about any of it I just keep repeating myself I get fucking stop repeating myself

Like I don't know how to get people to understand what I go through and it is agonizing

All I have ever wanted my entire life was to be loved

I have been abused by pedophiles I have been raped I have been molested by family members I have seen people die I have been assaulted by people my own age I have been held at gunpoint I can't even continue to list everything that's happened to me because it's just so much I can't even tell you how many traumas I have from my parents because it's Something that happened every day and the days that it didn't happen I was terrified

And I had to go through all these doctors and all these therapists and get missed diagnosed and thrown on medication that did not help me

That maybe possibly damaged my brain

But I don't know because my current psychiatrist doesn't seem to care I don't know I don't really understand him I just know that he thinks if it aint broke don't fix it and so he keeps me on the medicine that works for me but then he complains about how I can't be on it forever even though I've been on it for a very long time and I haven't had to really fuck with my dosage that much and it has not caused me memory issues the memory issues are complete disassociative issues

When I'm not stressed out what I'm calm when I'm collected when I'm not having people abuse me I'm completely different person

And the thing is I could bring Travis back to session and Travis can tell you exactly how full of shit my father is because he's seen it and he's read other messages and other nasty things my father has said to me he didn't say it in the text messages that I showed you but he said some really awful shit to me before

My own father has told me to go die

My own father has told my last EMDR therapist that he didn't want to ne my dad then left the room and came back a different person and said he loved me....

She told me that both my parents resent me and will not ever change.

She understood that I'm not trying to control them I wish I could have kept seeing her but she had personal problems and had to quit her job

I understand my circle of control however it is very frustrating when there's not much you can control in your circle of control because everybody else is trying to control it

I don't know if I have ever felt like my own person I don't know if I've ever been myself and I don't know how to explain to you that I don't even feel like a person or a human being because of the abuse that I have gone through

I don't know how to explain the symptoms I have from my diagnosis because it's not like everybody else and I don't understand I wish we'd never had that conversation about the stupid DSM or whatever the fuck acronym it is the diagnosis book

The psychiatrist that diagnosed me in the coroner that diagnosed me and the VA Doctor that was in another state that diagnosed me with complex PTSD and all the other issues I have they did not go by the book they went by symptoms and then decided that since I wasn't responding to any medications and I didn't have the full checklist of things that this is what I had the the list of things that I am diagnosed that's it That is it

And I shouldn't have to explain those things to people but when people don't understand me I don't know what I'm supposed to do

I know I can't make them do anything and I'm not really trying to and I wish people would really really really really really fucking understand that

I am not consciously trying to fuck with anybody's lives I could if I wanted to but I don't do that I'm not fucked up in the head and evil

And I and I just I don't know what to do anymore I don't know what to do anymore I wish I could just run away

Because right now all I feel like doing is fighting or running but I can't really do either

There are lots of things that are intrusive thoughts right now that if I said them would win me a trip to grippy sock hotel from hell

And I don't want to play medication roulette because it's not a medication issue

I just want to be happy and live my life and enjoy my life and no one really ever taught me about how to do anything I was passive neglectful parented that is what my lasked EMDR therapist told mate I really wish you could get her files she was furious with how I was treated she saw all of it my parents acted out in front of her

And you said I could be angry and it wouldn't hurt your feelings and so I am but I am sorry if it is hurting your feelings but I still am mad

And I will try my best to work on all the things I fuck up at because I'm such a fuck up

Everybody has to tell me about everything I do wrong nobody ever tells me anything positive about myself

When people say they're proud of me I don't believe them

Because my parents would say they were proud of me but then they would just yell at me and tell me how much of a stupid worthless inconvenient bitch an awful person I was in every way that you could imagine

The recordings I have set you are What it's like to try and just talk to my parents normally There's the lowest form of abuse but it still abuse and it still hurts and the other things are worse like he could have been in my face he could have had his hands-on me but my mother was there and she would have called the police

Or maybe she wouldn't because then he wouldn't be able to pay my rent and she doesn't want to put forth any effort to help me because she's so far up her own ass about her feet problems and her diabetes and her victim mentality

I know what my mother has gone through I as a child had to bring her juice constantly to bring her blood sugar up because she wasn't taking very good care of herself I had to learn to draw up insulin and where I was supposed to give her the insulin if she needed it when I was a kid and she denies this but it happened

It seems like neither of them can remember anything that they have done to me and if they do remember it they lie and then I catch them in the lie and they have giant tantrums

All the logic and all the books in the entire world that I have ever read and practiced to deal with my parents have not helped

Because my parents figure out some sort of way to fuck with me over and over and over

Because they figure out what I've learned and then they use it against me they use therapy against me

My mom says she loves me and she cares and she's trying but then she fucks up majorly and treats me like shit just like my dad

I do think that she has PTSD and is in need of seeing a therapist very badly but she keeps making excuses not to do so

There is nothing I can do about that there is nothing I can do about my father abusing me because I need to be in contact with him for various Things. Even if he didn't have to pay for anything he would still treat me like shit

I mean why can't he just tell me that he hates me and doesn't like me and doesn't like me and doesn't want to be my dad because he's already said it once but then how can you love somebody and treat them like garbage

I'm not playing games with them I'm masking as best I can and trying to act normal and please them and then I'm mirroring their behavior and they don't like it but I don't know how to be a person unless I figure out how somebody is acting and I mirror it to try and be on the same level is them but nobody like under stamps that and I've tried to explain it and they basically both told me to shut up and they would read about it when they had time and it just they don't care they don't fucking care and they say oh well if I didn't care then why would I show up to your therapy appointment blah blah blah blah blah

Then they try to make me look bad like I'm the bad person

Okay so I'm the bad person let's say I'm the bad person let's say I'm the evil bad daughter

What in the fuck do I have to gain from that

I don't want their fucking money anymore I don't want to have to deal with it

I should have never gotten to this point

And I have to rely on them because I can't calm down and get it together and make money under-the-table because my parents forced me into SSI and I have 0 safety net if I just wanted to get off of it and try something new

If I wanted to try to make extra money I couldn't because I'm going to get caught and I'm going of getting caught and getting in trouble even though I'm not even doing anything wrong

I'm not even trying to sell my artwork I'm not even making artwork to sell I can't even concentrate to function I can't even fucking get my apartment clean like it used to be because everything has gotten worse sinyes I have been continuously abused well into my late 30s

And they don't understand that it's like a huge fucking trauma that happened to me in January and they're just they don't get that it hurt and that was a trauma and that was their fault

And saying sorry doesn't cut it they should be in anger management classes like court ordered

But I wasn't allowed to call the police because they were going to manipulate the coroner and if I called the cops on just my sister or just my father they would band together to fuck me over I know how they think

His apology wasn't sincere or he wouldn't be abusing me and having me this worked up about it

He has 0 intention of helping me unless it's for his benefit

You know I had a Doctor once that told me that she would have jumped off the fucking Mississippi bridge by now because she met my father and she heard the way he spoke to me on the phone one time and it probably wasn't very good of her to say to me because I thought about it but I don't really like the idea of jumping into a large nasty body of water that goes into a larger nasty body of water in the gulf no thank you

And I have had countless other doctors that are like oh my fucking God by just meeting him and hearing how he spoke to me before they even walked into the room

I have been told to just go find a man that I can tolerate and marry him and get away from my family

As if eligible well off bachelors that want to deal with a physically disabled woman just grow on trees

My dad told me to just close my eyes and let Travis fuck meJust date him he's nice he'll take care of you just close your eyes

That's fucking insane

And my mother who has apologized countless times for this but it is still hurting me very badly told me that no one would ever want to marry me she laughed and this was after her asking what my dream life looked like which was very simple it was like I just want to be financially stable and have a partner or a husband and live in a modest home and have a garden and a 1/2 maybe a dog or a cat and just be happy like other people I know And she laughed at me and she fucking told me that no one was ever going to want to marry me because I had too many health problems

And then I've had people who are no longer my friends tell me the same thing

And everybody tells me I'm so negative well you know if you go through as much shit as I've gone through it's really hard to see anything positive anymore

Like I would love to have some sort of imaging done to see how much of my brain actually works and How much is damaged.

Because I don't know if I will ever be able to get better even though I'm very badly want to but I also don't know what I'm getting better from anymore but cause it seems like just complaints from everyone else

I haven't gotten to explore who I am ever

I don't feel like I have autonomy right now other than just the same autonomy someone would have in their own bedroom with some privacy

Because everything I do that my parents find out about comes under fire

I'm almost 40 it shouldn't be like this

I should not be having the intrusive thoughts that I'm having

I bought so much healthy food to cook myself and take care of myself and I fucki got help I had to ask for help but I asked Travis for help and he helped me with things around my apartment today and going to the grocery store and I hated having to ask for help

I feel pathetic I feel like a fucking loser I feel like shit

I don't feel like anybody on this Earth actually really wants me I don't even think my partner would want me if he met me in person

My heart has been broken for a very long time and my grief is overflowing

I am so angry and so sad and so tired

I don't even know what my self is so I can't even tell you if I feel like myself

I don't know what feeling better feels like unless it's getting better from a nasty cold or a virus

The only times that I don't feel pain is if I decide to drink a lot or if I smoke myself stupid with my medical marijuana which I really don't enjoy doing either And I'm not really a drinker it happens only about every 4 months just one time and then I regret it and I don't do it for another 4 months or longer

And then the medical marijuana is all I have for pain and the other pain medication that I still have my prescriptions for that I could take makes me act really weird and I don't like how it makes me feel and it really doesn't help the pain that I need it to help and my Doctor's freak out when they find out that I've taken like half a dose

And I don't know why I'm treated worse than like an addict because I've never had any sort of addiction issues I've never had any sort of breathing issues or complications I have surprisingly very good lungs

I know my body I've had to know my body because doctors Mistake noticed me so many God damn times that I had to start doing the research and learning so I could correct the Doctor so I could get the care that I needed so I wouldn't die or suffer

And then at some point I guess when I was really little and I got into my mom's medical books medical became my special interest and I wish it never had become my special interest though it has only caused me problems with doctors thinking that I'm hypochondriac which I'm not

But if I sit there in a Doctor appointment and I act stupid it doesn't really help the process of getting me diagnosed and getting me the treatment I need for whatever problem I'm experiencing so I have to teach myself and I have to learn in order to protect myself from faulty diagnosis

I was mistagnosed with borderline personality disorder and that is such an overdiagnosed umbrella diagnosis and I don't check all the boxes for that at all I do not act like that I do not even fit the description and I don't understand how I even got that diagnosis

And it took years and A va Doctor to point out that I didn't have that

I fucking hate it here

I wish I was happier I wish I had cool things to tell you but I don't right now

I mean I had a nice time at the farmer's market I came home and there was a whole bunch of glitter in the pool which was hilarious but now there's a whole bunch of loud people in the pool and that's not been fun and I spoke to the new lady in the office about the problems with apartment 60 because they are continuously being trashy and awful towards me

And Travis helped me and we went and got groceries anone of that was terrible except for the fact that the shopping cart hit my foot and broke my fucking toe and now I have to tape it to everywhere and I don't know if my toenail is going to fall off or not but I guess I'll find out

And I don't know how to calm down anymore I've been trying for hours to calm down

I want to talk to my partner I want attention from my partner I want to be loved by my partner but he is busy and I don't know when he is not going to be busy and I am sad

But I'm also scared that he has some sort of misunderstanding about me and who I am as a person even though he is lovely and says the most wonderful things to me and he's understanding of my situation is pretty apt but you know like you said no one can ever fully know you

And I miss Matthew and I hate that I do and because he hurt me so bad

And I miss my ex-boyfriend but he also hurt me and he has not made up for that and all I got was a bunch of I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm new and he never really did anything I see him getting sober and doing good things for himself now but fuck me I guess

And yes I'm jealous that my used to be friends are on vacation with my ex best friand who is going to be getting married soon and I'm going to have to see all of that all over social media and it makes me want to crawl in a hole and perish

And then another friend of mine I believe I told you as pregnant and that hurts too because medically I would have never been able to have a child due to my uterus tilt and the health conditions I have I would have never had a healthy child or carried to full term I most likely would have miscarried or had a premature very sick child so I did the most responsible thing I could do I harassed my OB-GYN from the time I was 16 till the time I was like 22 or older and he finally tied my tubes after I signed a document saying I wouldn't Sue him

And this was well before the rover's Wade rulaying and so was the uterine ablation

So I can't have my own kids I never liked the idea of carrying my own kids but it makes me sad because I wish I could have my own kids or I wish I was stable enough to adopt but I'm not and I have to live with that if it hurtsSo I can't have my own kids I never liked the idea of carrying my own kids but it makes me sad because I wish I could have my own kids or I wish I was stable enough to adopt but I'm not and I have to live with that if it hurts

Everything I have ever been through hurts so much and everything I have ever loved dearly has either died or been taken away from me

I don't know how to fix my brain

I can see the issues I just don't know what to do and I don't know how to do it successfully

Because I've been trying since I was 12 years old since I fixed myself because I was told I was broken and then I became more broken and more broken and I became but target and people use me and abuse me and raped me and it hurt me and it just replaced in my head all the time and I wish I could have laid going to war instead and that would have been my only trauma it's just being an active war

Cause it sounds a lot less shitty than this

I would probably make a excellent spy II would be a very good asset to our government I could be I don't care if that sounds fucking delusional I got one of the highest scores at Woodlawn on 1 of the military tests and they would not leave me alone for weeks until I had my uncle call them and tell them that I was disabled because he was part of the military

Because I told them I have all these medical issues I would love to do an intelligent job but I can't

And I get so mad sometimes because I have all these physical and mental issues

Because there's so many things that I want to do that I know I just can't do

I know that it's just something I wouldn't get hired for

[flishlish]

Just venting about shit lol

I have had some kind of mental breakdown on my birthday for the last like 7 years and I'm frankly fucking tired of it. Like just for once I would like my plans to go smoothly and not either be canceled by a literal disaster, or get stood up by a "friend" or have a big fight in my family. It's a week away and my family is already pissing me off. It's not like there treating me any different than usual i suppose but it really does shine a light on how I bend over backwards for them constantly but they can't be bothered to inconvenience themselves for me in the slightest unless I practically beg them to even on my own fucking birthday.

Like I'm going down to my dad's house because even though he lives like 3 hours away I visit nearly every other weekend and it been like 3 weeks since I've been down and he's been guilt tripping me constantly about how he never sees me. Not that he ever comes to visit me where I live. He literally comes here less than once a year on average, and only if he also has other business in the area. But fine. whatever. I guess I agreed to it before I realized I would have to drive there for 3 weeks in a row.

Then my sister called me this morning, to ask what I was doing, and she can't come on my actual birthday because her partner agreed to visit his aunt that day??? Like I don't care if he comes actually! You can miss that! And then she complains for about half an hour about how she's gonna have to do all this driving around that week so can I do dinner closer to her place (another hour away) instead of our dad's. Like bitch I drove 4 hours each way to your fucking birthday party last month and you can't drive 45 minutes to have dinner with me?? I get that she's busy but I fully know she drives between the 2 cities constantly to see her friends, and I'm not even asking her to reschedule anything. AND THEN she asked if I could do her a favour by dropping off her partner's child (who I've only met once) at his ex's house in yet another city, which would add 2 full ass hours to my drive home?!?! That's fully insane what are you even talking about?

And, both of them spent half the time they talked to me today complaining about each other so I'm sure the atmosphere is gonna be just fucking great between the two of them at dinner. I know that it's like, at least partly the mental illness or whatever but I'm just so sure it's going to go terribly just like it always seems to. I guess that's on me for having any expectations ever about anything.

[thedivinecalamity]

God I need to bitch so badly right now, I'll put it under a readmore since I don't know how long it will be

I fucking hate finding a new psychiatrist. My """current""" one used to be good but they partnered with a big practice and now I have no way of getting ahold of him, and the people he's asked me to speak to instead never respond to my emails, and one day I literally called them 5 times throughout the day and left a message, and they still never contacted me back. Oh but they'll gladly pester me about getting a new card in their system since the old one expired :) Except they still make me enter my card details every fucking time before an appointment, and one time it was declining my card despite knowing I had the money (it just said a general error) so I couldn't join the meeting, and had no way of contacting them so I ended up missing it :))

I found a new psychiatrist now, but I really dislike her. I'm sorry but I'm going to go on a misogynistic rant now, I do not care, I am a woman, I am allowed to criticize other women for being ableist towards me. I've noticed female psychiatrist are so much worse than male ones. All the female psychiatrists I've had have been the worst ones I've ever had, sure I won't deny that I have had bad experiences with men, but I feel like the men tend to listen to me at least? (I know that sounds insane, I do not think that for other medical fields absolutely not) I'm sure I have a sample bias, I won't deny that, but god I am tired.

Like I feel like female psychiatrists see someone mentally ill and feel the need to baby them?? Or treat them like idiots that know they have no clue what they could be talking about cause they're just that retarded. I've gotten this treatment way more from women, I just genuinely don't know why. And yes, I know I mentioned my current psychiatrist as 'he', and believe me I am pissed at him, but before he partnered with a larger company he would actually listen to me and believed in what I was saying.

I had an appointment with my new psychiatrist (who I hope at least improves or I can find someone new), it lasted only half an hour, but holy shit. I mention my symptoms and mental illnesses, including ocd which is especially hard to mention to people irl. After I'm done describing some of my symptoms, which I did not describe all because I am not very good at explaining things on the spot, she just goes "I don't think you have ocd, those symptoms sound like xyz and you do not have these very specific symptoms (despite how varied ocd can be)." Fuck You. You've known me for 15 minutes. I literally have an official ocd diagnosis. Yes she wouldn't know that since she hasn't gotten that paperwork yet, but in that case why don't you just shut the fuck up until it arrives. I absolutely know people like to self diagnose themselves with ocd all the time, partially as a joke. She probably has heard that a lot and maybe (hopefully) is "trying" to say I don't have it to not have it be such a misconception. But it goes both fucking ways. The amount of "well meaning" people I've had tell me that I do not have ocd because so many jackasses have self diagnosed themselves is staggering. You are not being helpful to people with ocd. I just have to hide it even more. Tbh, even if I was faking having ocd, what good even is that comment? I'm sure there's some people that would self reflect, but I think most would likely get defensive and double down.

I have another medication that helps with my concentration, and she believes in my other mental illnesses, but for some reason doesn't see how that medication helps me?? Despite describing how much of a life changer it is? I don't want to get into the details about this point really, but she's kinda threatening to take it away from me. This is another problem I've had with female psychiatrists. They seem so judgemental of medications and always try to get me off of mine. They make me feel like they're judging me as some sort of druggie. Maybe it has something to do with those women who believe medications are the devils work and use fucking home remedies like radiated mud or fucking crystals. They always seem to want to give me therapy instead of helping with my meds, despite the fact that I already have a therapist I can contact that actually fucking listens to me and helps me and believes that I have ocd. I swear to god these people want the pay of a psychiatrist but just want to practice therapy. I don't want therapy from you shithead! You don't believe in so many things I've said and seem to ignore anything else.

I can't fucking stand this shit anymore. I'm sure people would think I'm a total baby for getting upset at these things. I wouldn't be this upset if this was a one off. But I'm sick of hearing these types of comments and attitudes. I'm so sick of the jokes about ocd that people will make and then turn around and try to be "allies" by "correcting" me. I am sick of people acting like needing certain meds means your a druggie or a sign that you're a failure. This psychiatrist, and many others will say this shit to me, and then at 5:30 turn in for the day and completely forget this shit they've said, because it's not something they care or need to think about. It doesn't affect them. But I have to constantly deal with these fucking comments. I hate mentioning my ocd irl, but you kind of have to with psychiatrists. So I do. And this is what I fucking get? I have to involuntarily expose part of myself that normally I would only do after long trusting someone, and you take that and just fucking crush it, and you don't even realize it.

[skinni-girls-eat-books]

Thursday November 9th

6am Woke up really well rested! Good!

Got sad when I saw I didn't have any messages overnight. CBT: This is your anxiety plugging emotions into nothing. Nothing has transpired, there's no real reason to feel anxiety, the anxiety is only coming from inside you.

Why hasn't he texted you? He's sleeping and he's a POS you don't need that controlling your energy. You can't control what he does. Reclaim your energy.

What am I thankful for this morning?

- nights rest, stretches, soft blankets, cool fan, and the fact that I have no hw due tonight! Think about that! ❤️

630am I should buy another candle for the bathroom for my showers lol don't know why the last one went so quick

7am tumblr can be a really nice positive space, it's like the only positive social media like that's kinda insane.

8am about to get ready for class, I can't stop thinking about him. I would like to try to not text him today just to see what happens really. I'm afraid he won't notice or not care and just not text me either. Maybe that's what I need. Whatever this is, is clearly not working. Got to leave early enough to get a coffee bc maybe that will distract me. Drink for lunch too, I'm tired of gorging myself and wasting money on food. Just breathe oh yeah I'm going to take a benadryl and maybe that will help with anxiety.

830am I want to text him so bad but I really shouldn't lol. He doesn't care enough to change. I won't say he doesn't care at all, but he doesn't care enough for me to keep doing this. I got an iced coffee and an egg McMuffin :)

11am Daydreaming about traveling over the break. I need to be realistic tho. I know I am able to take off on a flight somewhere but let's be real I probably won't have the time off and money to do something like that. I'll keep it in mind, but I don't want another Disney scenario where I just go completely broke on one adventure, I'd rather do day trips, maybe an overnight if that even sounds like a good idea. I like sleeping in my own bed unless it's for a really good reason tbh. I want to focus on things around here that I don't typically have availability or mental capacity to do. I know I'll have fun regardless. Maybe even do the plasma thing some afternoons or mornings really to fund the adventures I'll have on my true off days. Just thoughts :)

1130am I passed my HIV patient counseling! It says satisfactory in the gradebook! For some reason I can't see my rubric so I started to panic and doubt myself, but now I know I'm not the only one who can't see their rubric, so I'm sure that part is a fluke/ irrelevant :) just breathe and enjoy the passing grades ❤️ if something is wrong, someone will let you know ❤️

12pm lunchtime! I'm getting curry chicken. Journaling is actually helping a lot and made me realize how intrusive and repetitive my thoughts are when I don't write them down. It's like I need a little vent port for these thoughts to fly out of my brain like steam out of a boiling pot of water. Crazy tbh lol.

1pm Ate lunch outside with some friends and it felt great!!

3pm lol I zoned out during the whole Verbal Defense (not mine!) But then he texted me good afternoon so I sent him a picture of my sweet tea, nothing crazy. I won't let him control my evening. I just wonder what is his motive lol. During class I was looking up free and cheap things to do and it's funny how a little googling can come up with a thousand things to do! So much fun to be had in the world :)

4pm he got me looking at my phone for a text back bitch guess what I'm taking a nap just like I planned lmao I'm not waiting around to talk to you wtf. Call me like I asked you to if you wanna talk, I hate this texting shit and he knows that. What am I a high schooler? Texting bs got you into this mess in the first place dumbass. I'm eating a cupcake and taking a nap.

6pm I have woke up from my nap. No messages lol I guess he just wanted to see if I was alive?? Don't know don't care. Nap was ok, cats kept waking me up or micro waking me up I think but that's ok too :) - There's really only one week left of this bullshit I am so proud of myself ❤️ I actually love the idea of NOT burning myself out the last week so that when I leave school I don't necessarily NEED to do that hibernating thing where I feel like shit for 4-5 days afterwards. I'd like to exit my verbal defense maybe take a nap just like I did today to refresh and then shit take myself out for a nice dinner and get dressed up. Instead of getting drunk and passing out, I can do that most other nights after a closing shift 🤣 I want to start my vacay right away with no need to "recover" in such a drastic manner. Let's see if we can make that happen :) I think that also includes NOT avoiding fun things the next week, bc I always avoid fun stuff when I'm stressed as if I'm going to jinx myself, but I think I'm ready to break that curse of "all work and no play." We shall see ;)

9pm A little tipsy but I'm getting my work done :)

11pm I keep wanting to text him because I'm in a GOOD MOOD but when he doesn't reply it puts me in a bad mood....... So solution is simply DON'T TEXT HIM AND ENJOY YOUR GOOD MOOD QUEEN 😂 he's stupid for leaving and he's missing out on this drunken chill fest tbh and one day, I'll have a fuck ton of friends I've acquired through the years of being myself that I can randomly snap my thoughts to and they'll actually reply and care 😂

12am I know I texted him some dumb shit but idc I still feel good and I love journaling and Tumblr. Getting tacos again for dinner bc JFC I did a LOT of dumb shit work today. He's such a loser he can't do shit by himself not even get a taco 🤣 tbh one day I feel like you'll find someone who's gone through what you've gone through and you'll have so much in common and everything will just be EASY. Yeah I'm fucked but I'm not the only one going through this so I know I have an army of ppl out in the world who would have my back in a heartbeat and THAT'S what matters and what keeps me going fr.

1245am What a weird day. I want to keep journaling so bad I think it'll help me alottttt. I texted him a little but it's like it doesn't matter as much as it did previously lol. It's different now. Let's keep it up :)

[legobatman08]

Tumblr X Twitter enemies to lovers based off of this post

Part One

This is loosely inspired by the post that threatened twitter users. I can't find it so I apologize if it's inaccurate.

The Tumblr Migration of 2022 = Twitter becoming Tumblr's new asshole roommate

Tumblr rolled their eyes as their roommate rambled on and on about why they were switching dorms.

- Tumblr, you are literally insane! Being your roommate is simply unbearable. I mean, come on, you made my life living hell! I can't stand the sight of you anymore. Goodbye.

- See ya, bitch, go to Eeby Deeby for all I care!

- THAT IS EXACTLY WHAT I MEAN! WHAT ARE YOU EVEN TALKING ABOUT?

- Are you seriously saying that you've never heard of Eeby Deeby? Dude, what is wrong with you?

- WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT?

Tumbr opened their mouth to respond, but they were interrupted.

- YOU KNOW WHAT? I DON'T EVEN WANNA KNOW. BYE, MOTHERFUCKER! - They shouted as they stormed out of the room.

A small sigh of relief left Tumblr's mouth. Seriously, they were glad that their roommate left. The guy didn't even understand Horse Plinko references, for Christ's sake! Tumblr didn't understand how some people's brains worked. To be quite frank with you, they weren't too eager to find out.

Hopefully their new roommate wouldn't be so bad.

A couple of days had passed after the incident. Tumblr was exhausted. They had just finished writing the most stressful exam of their entire life, and they felt like they were going to pass out. It was as if someone had dropped a hundred car batteries on top of their body.

They put on their headphones and started playing We Didn't Start The Fire on loop to get their mind off of the exam. They couldn't wait to go home.

Upon arrival, just as Tumblr were about to plop down on their bed, they realized that someone was already there.

- 'Sup? Nice to meet you, I'm Twitter.

- Oh, um, - Tumblr eyed their new roommate up and down. Twitter was undeniably very attractive, but they gave off Spoiled Rich Kid vibes, - hi, I guess. I'm Tumblr.

- Dude, you look like shit. Are you alright?

- Geez, thanks for the compliment, - Tumblr winced at the reminder of their current state, - 'm fine, just exam stress and stuff.

They stopped for a minute as their brain finally caught up:

- Wait, what the hell are you doing on my bed?

- I was waiting for ya. Got tired of sitting on your stiff ass chair.

- Excuse me? Get lost before my bees sting the shit out of you.

Twitter laughed as if it was a joke:

- What the hell, mate? Ya think imma just believe your bullshit? What am I, 10?

Tumblr was really getting tired of this. They were already having a bad day, and now this fucker wasn't even taking them seriously:

- You fucking asked for it.

A swarm of bees came through the window at Tumblr's shrill whistle. Twitter looked taken aback. Tumblr couldn't believe the audacity of this dude.

- AH! WHAT THE FUCK? BRO, I THOUGHT YOU WERE FUCKING WITH ME, HELP ME!! AJSJALEJL HELP THEY STING AAAAAAH! - Twitter cried out as they ran out the room, the bees chasing them.

- Be reasonable next time or I'll be tossing your rotten flesh to them! - Tumblr called after them in a sing-song voice.

They were trying their best not to laugh. Sure, it crossed some lines of morals and ethics, but, surely, this level of entertainment oughtn't be criticised!

Tumblr visited Twitter in the ER.

Despite Tumblr's messed up perception of well-being, Twitter looked awful. They had a comically large amount of bee stings dotted all over their body, and Tumblr couldn't help but giggle a little.

Twitter glared at them:

- What's so fucking funny? I didn't expect you to be this much of a psycho. No but seriously, what the actual fuck was that?

Tumblr raised an eyebrow as if the question was utterly ridiculous.

- My Brother in Christ, you were being annoying. I simply offered a reasonable response.

- REASONABLE RESPONSE?

- Yes, and?

Twitter's eyes were as huge as saucers. Tumblr could see a tinge of fear and concern in their expression, but they couldn't figure out why.

- Bro. You can't be serious.

Tumblr just shrugged. Twitter furrowed their brow:

- You need help.

[mid-weast]

Will you keep it down? | Jeon Jungkook

Summary: You and Jungkook attend the same university and have been neighbors for 3 months now. It drives you crazy that he plays loud music at 2AM, and it drives him crazy that you barely acknowledge his presence.

Pairing: Jungkook x Female!Reader; Black!Reader

Words: 2.6K

Genre: enemies to lovers, student!jungkook, student!reader, fluff, mention of smut, angst? (in the form of bickering back and forth).

Authors note: Hi hi! This is the first fic I’ve ever written so if it’s bad I’m sorry. Also it is unedited so if there's grammar / spelling mistakes I'm sorry again! Also this is catered toward the reader being Black but I hope it can be enjoyed by everyone. Thank you for reading! Feedback is appreciated ok love u bye!

“Y/N? ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME??!? Open this door RIGHT NOW!”

Even though you were studying in your room, his knocks were so loud you nearly jumped out of your skin. You had expected a reaction, but not a full-on explosion.

You and Jungkook have been apartment neighbors for about three months now, and a constant problem is that he blares his music hella loud late at night. Of course he’s a music major so he listens to music a lot, but at this point you don’t care. It doesn’t even seem like he’s working on composition homework anyway, just being an asshole with no regard for his neighbors peace. Now don’t get yourself wrong, you're not just some uptight bitch who complains about everything. Well, you do have several pet peeves but over the years of going to school in Korea you’ve picked and chosen your battles very wisely. In most cases you let things slide. You wouldn’t care at all about someone playing the music loudly, but it is 2 AM, and while you’re up studying you know a lot of your other neighbors are trying to sleep.

You tiptoe toward your front door and twist the knob slowly. You only open the door wide enough to be able to see his face. It’s not that you’re scared that you’re in danger or anything, and you rarely back down from people giving you a hard time. But you were tired, wearing a big ass t- shirt and short shorts (your regular sleep attire), and it was late at night. So if anything was going to pop off you felt pretty vulnerable. Even though you’re the same age, he towers over you and you find his size kinda intimidating.

As usual, you have to crane your neck to see his face, and your view of him is limited by the narrowness in which

you opened the door.

“Can I help you, lil boy?”

From what you can see of him, right away you can tell that he is pissed. Dawning his usual attire of a black sweatshirt with the hood up, black sweats, and stomp a hoe boots, he stood extremely close to your apartment door with his arms crossed. His usually wide, puppy dog eyes are now pressed in narrow slits. His normally pouty lips are formed in a hard line, and his jaw is so clenched you could carve an ice sculpture with his jawline.

"Who the hell do you think you are? You called the cops on me? Are you INSANE???" Jungkook shouts.

Obviously he's mad, and despite the amount of times you've gone back and forth he's never raised your voice at you. The old you would have screamed back at him, but over time you've tried to respond to anger with calmness. Also, you were a little scared because this mf is kind of big.

"I already told you if you keep blaring your music at 2AM, I was going to do something about it!" You respond in a hushed whisper, slightly concerned that your elderly neighbors will be even more disturbed by the noise. "I've told you this a million times, and you barely do anything about it. If anything, it's gotten worse like you're doing it on purpose. People are trying to sleep and I'm trying to study, why is this so hard for you to understand?"

He sucks his teeth. "You're such a little snitch. And I've already told YOU that YOU can't tell me what to do."

"I know I can't...but they can," you nod toward the exit, referring to the police officers that most likely just left out that way with a tiny smirk growing on your face.

If it was possible, he clenched his jaw even harder and you think that he's going to pop a blood vessel. He pushes his way into your apartment, which sends you stumbling back and you grab the door handle to regain your balance. This causes you to close the door shut.

"Hey! What the hell do you think you're-"

He steps right up to you and leans down into your face.

"Who the fuck do you think you are, seriously??? Why are you such an annoying little brat? Just because you're a nerd with no friends who gets no play doesn't mean you can take your bitterness out on me.”

You have to laugh in his face at this point because hello??? First of all, who is he talking to? Second of all, you have told him a BUNCH of times to turn his music down late at night. You didn't think that was too much to ask. As far as you were concerned, being aware of your noise level when you live in an apartment is the universal bare minimum for being a human being.

"ME? Who do you think YOU are? Actually let me tell you. You're an entitled little rich boy who thinks he runs the world. I don't give a fuck about how popular you are on campus, how many people fall at your feet to be around you, and how many hoes you have, you cant talk to ME like that. And how are you going to try and tell me about myself when it's too much of a task for you to be a decent neighbor? I've never done anything to blatantly bother you, so why can you just.." You started to panic because usually when you raise your voice out of anger, your voice cracks and tears threaten to pool out of your eyes, but you tried to get a grip and not back down..."why can you just be nice to me so we can live in peace? Is that too hard for you???"

He looked kind of taken aback by your question. Being nice to you? It never crossed his mind. Also, you kind of had a point. When the semester started and you both moved in on the same day, you would shoot him a small, friendly smile in passing but you never seemed interested in getting to know him. He always wondered why that was. It's not that he had a problem talking with girls, since all he had to do was breathe and girls would come flocking around him, but you would flat out ignore him. Even at all the major parties at the beginning of the year and on Thursday nights when students take over the clubs in the city, you'd barely even acknowledge him. He KNEW that you had seen him too, since you would make eye contact, but you acted like he was just another guy at the club.

And he'd be lying if he said you weren't fine. You had thick thighs, a beautiful face, nice curves, and always wore outfits that hugged you in the right places. He always wondered what it would feel like to wrap his arms around your body and press it against his own. He would constantly sneak peaks of you throughout the night at the club, but something stirred in him when he saw that you were chatting up other guys. Was he...jealous? Jealous that you were so eager to pay attention to these dudes who, in his opinion, were decent looking but they were nowhere near his level, and you never even gave him a second thought? One night he even saw you leaving with a man he knew through mutual friends, and he had to physically stop himself from breaking the glass he was holding, because that guy, while objectively handsome, was nothing compared to him. Jungkook wasn't blatantly cocky, but he let his talent, charm, and looks speak for themselves. He was THEE Jeon Jungkook, and nothing ever really bothered him....except you.

Was he....interested in you? Nah, that can't be it. You were some random chick who happened to be his neighbor, who also is one of the only girls he's met that doesn't give two fucks about even having small talk with him, and that infuriated him for some reason. So the first time you came knocking on his door in an adorable pink satin pajama set with a matching bonnet complaining about his loud music, he knew the game he had to play.

He's still standing over you, centimeters away from you face, but you notice that his eyes soften a little and so does his jaw. He unclenches the fists he was holding crossed against his chest

You continue, “I don't care what you do, and I'm DEFINITELY trying to run your messy ass life. Believe me," you scoff, "you don't have enough money to pay me to do that. But when your dickhole behavior fucks with MY life is when it's a problem. And it's BEEN a problem."

He rolls his eyes. "Whatever, little girl, maybe I should call you little mouse now, since now I know that you'll go squeaking to the cops now, don't fuck with me or my music again.”

Without moving your head you look him up and down with a confused expression. "Am I supposed to be scared of you? No seriously, you look like you cry during Disney movies while wearing footie pajamas, and now here you are throwing a fit because I forced you to stop bothering the entire wing with your music?"

Girl...what are you saying??? This man just barged into YOUR place, is in your face, and is strong enough to pick you up and throw you, and you’re insulting him? But you figured if he's going to be rude, you'll throw it right back because you're tired of his bullshit.

Whatever softness he was feeling for a fleeting moment immediately left, and annoyance once again washed over. He straightens up a bit and puts on that annoying confident smirk he wears when he thinks he's won arguments between you two.

"You should be nicer to me, all it will take is for me to tweet one thing about you, and you'll be the most hated person on campus."

At this point, any suspicions that you had about him annoying you on purpose were confirmed. You've concluded that this mf is a bully and you, small and shy but not one to take mess, will put him in his place to-motherfucking-night.

You take a step toward him, now crossing your arms tightly against your chest, but he doesn't even move a hair backwards.

"Clearly you need a rude awakening so here it is. I don't know what type of people you've dealt with all your life, always saying yes to you, letting you boss them around and taking whatever bullshit you dish out, but let me tell you I am not the one. Never have been and never will be. Unlike the other fools around here who cream their pants at the mention of your name, I don't care about who you are. You'll respect ME and MY peace as long as we're neighbors, you get me?"

Now y/n, you have never so boldly stood up to someone, where did that come from, babes? You've tried to not let this entitled little boy get to you this whole time, but with him standing in front of you in the middle of your apartment with that extremely annoying, yet handsome, smirk on his face, and after all the crap he's said tonight, he had you all the way fucked up.

After you said that, he just laughed and looked away. Now you’re standing there fuming and confused...was there a joke you missed? You were being dead serious!

"Something funny?" you ask, narrowing your eyes.

"Nothing, just thinking about how I want to face fuck that annoying little mouth of yours so you finally shut up.”

Your jaw almost dropped to the floor. You've never had a guy say something so blatantly rude and vulgar literally inches away from your face. But again, you weren't going to back down.

"Oh really?" Scoffing and tilting your head to the side a bit while narrowing your eyes even more, "I'd very much like to do the same. Maybe then you'll learn your place."

"Oh please, princess, you probably blanch when someone around you even mentions the word sex." He chuckles and leans down close toward your face again and cocks his head to the side, scrunching his nose and in a pouty voice said, "you're fooling no one, but keep trying, maybe you'll get there.”

You're even more annoyed than you were before, if that was even possible. But if he wanted to play this game, you might as well go there with him. It's true, you were a bit more prudent than more, but it pissed you off that he could tell. Regardless, you do know some things to say that could have him leaving with his tail between his legs.

You pouted your lips and in a babying tone said, “Aww sweetheart you have no idea. You think you're big and bad but like I said, you probably cry watching Disney movies. The same way you'd be crying, begging me to let you cum down my throat as I mercilessly toy with your cock for hours.”

Now it's his turn to go pale. Y/n, his stuck up neighbor who has barely even spared him five seconds of her time just threatened to edge him into submission? He has to pinch himself because he must be dreaming....

“Well I-“

“But I don't even think we’d make it that far, hun” you continue, “because in order to humble your egotistical, disrespectful ass, I'm gonna have to ride your face until you suffocate. And when the paramedics come and I have to explain how you died, I won't even hesitate to tell them that you were a punk ass loser who LITERALLY drowned in my pussy!”

You don’t know who this person speaking is, but it is not you. All of the pent up hostility you’ve held towards him just flooded out of you and you couldn’t stop the words from coming out. To be honest you shocked yourself, but you still stood there with your arms crossed and your face unfaltering, just waiting for him to say something smart back.

He stared at you silently, eyes wider than you’ve seen before and his mouth hung slightly open. He wasn’t expecting you to respond with so much fire, but now he wouldn’t be able to sleep until the image you painted came true. His brain said fuck it, and his lips crashed down onto yours. The kiss is sloppy but passionate, and you swore you heard him quietly whimper.

When he feels you starting to kiss back, he smirks into the kiss. Your lips are moving against each other in tandem, and all thoughts about how much you despise the prick fades away. As you uncrossed your arms and placed them on his chest, you could feel his heart beating wildly. Was he as nervous as you were this whole time? You wonder. You knew he was a player, so he was experienced. But the thought that you made him nervous gave you a tiny confidence boost. His hands slowly slide up the sides of your body to sneak behind your back, to pull you further into his chest. As much as your brain was telling you to resist him and push him away, you couldn't help but fall victim to how soft his lips felt against yours. Suddenly you feel airborne as he swiftly reaches down behind your thighs and picks you up. You instinctively gasp but he doesn’t miss a beat, simply biting your lower lip and locking your lips together again.

“Maybe we should test that scenario of yours, and if it comes true, that wouldn’t be the worst way for me to go” he says, doing that annoying but soul-crushingly handsome smirk he likes to wear as he carries you off to your bedroom.

[rizubaby]

You're My Toy | Kokichi Ouma.

genre ; nsfw oneshot.

request ; Kokichi Ouma with a sweet and submissive s/o whom he just wants to break.

summary ; you've been studying all day, trying to prepare for a big test. Kokichi is not a fan of someone or something taking your attention away from him, so he decides to punish you for it.

tags ; fem!reader, boyfriend experience, rough sex, degradation, corruption and mindbreak, cum play, usage of sex toys, vulgar language.

wc ; 1,7k.

note ; this was such a blast to write! I was on a roll while writing this so I managed to finish it quicker than I initially thought. I hope you like it! ♡

This is an 18+ post. Minors dni.

It's almost 11 pm. You've been behind your desk all day, studying for a big test you have coming up in a couple days. Even though everyone around you has no doubt you'll ace the test, you can't help but feel like you need to study so much your brain'll start to hurt. You lower your head onto the desk, letting out a tired sigh.

A moment passes and suddenly, you hear your boyfriend Kokichi enter your study. You don't even bother to look up since you're so exhausted. He's probably here just to annoy you again or to try and keep you from your work.

"S/o."

Just as you slowly lift your head from your desk, you notice Kokichi is looking rather serious. He has his hands balled into fists, seemingly frustrated about something. "K-kokichi? what's wrong?" you ask, not expecting him to look at you the way that he did. Did something happen? Was he mad at you?

Without warning, he steps towards you and turns your desk chair around, now facing him directly. He brings his face closer to yours and aggressively presses his lips against yours. You're surprised, but lean into the passionate kiss nonetheless. You feel your cheeks burn up a bit, one of his hands on your thigh as the other suddenly pulls on your hair. Your head is yanked back a bit, breaking up the kiss instantly. He looks mad.

"You... You've been neglecting me all. day. It's driving me insane, you know that?" he whispers into your ear, biting at your neck with a slightly aggressive undertone. You flinch, not expecting him to behave like this. You fumble with your words, not knowing exactly how to properly respond to him while he's doing all these things to you.

Kokichi suddenly pulls away, leaving you blushing bright red and shaken up in your chair. He gives you one last glance before turning around and leaving the room, closing the door behind him.

Not able to fully comprehend what just happened, you let your face fall into the palms of your hands. What was that about?

Concerned about having hurt Kokichi's feelings, you stand up from your chair and decide to pull yourself together and head towards the bedroom. You slowly make your way down the hall and open the door to you guys' bedroom. He's...not there?

"K...Kokichi? where are yo--" you're suddenly cut off by the sound of the bedroom door closing behind you, him standing right behind you. Right as you're turning around to look at him, he grabs you by the collar of your blouse and harshly pulls you towards him. A smirk appears on his face, yet you're not sure what it means.

You never know what that look means.

"Get on the bed. Now." he orders, his devilish smirk making you worry just a little bit. Doing as he says, you slowly walk backwards towards the bed until you feel the edge bump against your legs, not breaking the eye contact. You slowly sit down onto the edge of the bed, your cheeks burning up again.

"Like I said, you've been ignoring me all day and neglecting your duties as my girlfriend. What are you going to do to make it up to me, hm?" he walks towards you, lifting your chin up as he takes a good look at your flustered face. You're always so sweet and innocent, at times like this it makes him want to ruin and corrupt you even more.

"U-um... I can-" you mumble, not sure what you were even going to answer. "What was that? I can't hear you." he remarked, raising his eyebrow sadistically.

"I-I... I can be your toy?" you stutter, slightly embarrassed by what you had just said. He seemed to like it though, since his mischievous grin only seemed to grow larger.

"That's right. You're my toy."

Kokichi suddenly pushes you back onto the bed, aggressively spreading your legs apart. It all happened so fast, you didn't have time to fully wrap your head around what was happening. As you look down, you see Kokichi's face from between your legs, his purple eyes gazing right at you. He pulls your laced panties to the side and snickers devilishly. "Look at this, you're already so wet from that! You're so dirty s/o, I'm so ashamed to call you my girlfriend..." he spoke in a degrading tone, reaching inside the pocket of his jacket as he pulled out what looked like a pink vibrator.

He wasted no time, turning the toy on and holding it against your sensitive clit. You immediately arched your back in response to the sudden and intense feeling you got from it, gripping the sheets tightly. You hear Kokichi giggle from underneath you, clearly enjoying your reaction. "This is nothing. Let's see how much you can really take," he says before forcefully pushing the vibrator inside your pussy. You let out a surprised and pained moan, much to Kokichi's liking.

Shaking profusely from the intense pleasure, you feel your eyes tearing up, your grip on the bedsheets becoming so tight you feel like you're going to tear a hole in them with your nails. From your half closed blurry eyes, you see Kokichi stand up from underneath you, unbuckling his belt. "Get up."

You look at him with teary eyes, still trembling from the toy vibrating inside your hole. "I said: Get. Up." His eyes feeling like they're piercing right through you, you slowly get up, your face bright red as beads of sweat form on your forehead. Kokichi grins at your lewd expression, whipping his dick out from his pants. "Now suck me off, you dirty slut."

Blushing heavily, you get onto all fours and move to the edge of the bed where Kokichi is standing, bringing your face closer to his shaft. It's perfect in size, twitching slightly as you wrap your hand around it. You prepare yourself to take his shaft inside your mouth as you suddenly feel Kokichi's hand push your head down onto his length. You choke in surprise, but quickly adjust to the new feeling as you bob your head up and down his shaft.

"Wow s/o, you're soooo naughty... Listen to those dirty sounds you're making! You're so disgusting." He remarks, snickering maliciously as he looks at you taking his entire length inside your mouth. "Let's really make you my dirty little bitch, shall we?" he says as he grabs a small remote from his back pocket. He holds it up proudly and presses a small button on the tiny device.

You immediately feel the vibrator that's still inside your hole start to vibrate more intensely. You stop for a second, moaning onto his cock as you feel your legs shake uncontrollably in response. You hear Kokichi laugh in amusement, pushing your head even further onto his shaft. You sputter, finally feeling your orgasm wash over you as you feel the tip of his shaft touch the back of your throat. Your eyes roll back into your skull, feeling Kokichi's hot cum shoot into the back of your throat simultaneously. You let out a weak moan, still not completely done riding out your climax.

Kokichi slowly pulls his dick out of your mouth, some drops of cum rolling down your chin as you take a moment to catch your breath. Your eyes are still blurry and your face feels burning hot, bringing your hand up to your face as you catch the remaining droplets of cum with your finger. Kokichi looks at you with a faint blush now apparent on his cheeks. You let your fingers run against the tip of his dick once more, gathering the last bits of his cum and bringing it to your mouth.

"Look at you, such a dirty cum slut... Who's my little cum princess, hm?" he asks degradingly. "I-I am," you reply, now feeling like any type of dignity and self-respect you had left has completely evaporated. "That's right, nyehehe..."

Having had enough of your mouth, Kokichi orders you to turn around once more, pulling the vibrator out of your soaking pussy. You gasp softly at the sudden feeling of emptiness, looking over your shoulder to meet your eyes with his. "K-Kokichi, please... I-I want--" you mumble, suddenly feeling his cold fingers stroke against your entrace. You shiver, letting out a surprised moan.

"Let's finish you off, hehehe..." Kokichi giggles, positioning the tip of his dick in between your folds, pushing into you painfully slow. Now having his entire length inside you, he doesn't move an inch. You turn around and look at him, his devilish grin staring back at you. You feel like you're going insane, wanting to move your hips against him to have at least some type of friction. He stops you though, not allowing you to move.

"Ah, ah ah... not yet. I want to hear you beg for me, you little slut." Kokichi says, his expression turning stoic. Feeling like you're losing your grip on reality, desperate begs and moans flow out of your mouth, begging for him to move and to fuck you senseless. Kokichi laughs. "I never expected you to say such dirty words s/o, I will have to punish you for that."

You immediately feel him start to move, picking up the pace rather quickly as he thrusts into you with full force. He grips your sides tightly with one hand, the other slapping your ass aggressively. Loud moans spill out of you, thick tears rolling down your cheeks. He grabs your wrists, keeping them placed on your back as your face buries itself into the mattress. You didn't imagine Kokichi to be this rough and degrading, but you were slipping into a state of pure bliss, not caring about anything anymore. The only thing you could think about was Kokichi ramming into you, your tongue rolling out of your mouth from the intense pleasure.

You hear soft grunts and giggles coming from behind you, indicating that Kokichi was getting close to his climax once again. His pace speeding up even more makes your eyes roll into the back of your head, letting out a loud scream as you feel his hot load fill you up again.

Trembling uncontrollably, you feel yourself cumming as well, feeling the mix of your juices trickle down your legs. Kokichi snickers, giving you one last spank before pulling out of you.

He takes a step back and admires the pretty sight of your demolished hole trembling before him, running his finger along your hole and bringing his cum soaked finger to his mouth. He licks it off, a satisfied grin forming on his face.

"That'll teach you, my little sex freak."

[yandere-daydreams]

Do you ever worry if you'll get targeted on this blog for the content you write ? Like don't get me wrong I'm a fan of your work but with the way things are with security and all who really knows how much is at risk I wouldn't be suprised if in a couple of decades authors could get traced back to their old blogs and fanfics leading to the phenomenon of " yes I wrote a tumblr porn blog in my teens and I write real books now bitch !" Seriously though it would totally suck for you if a follower from your blog targeted you and went yandere for you irl not to mention thats some fucked irony btw sorry for this mess but I'm tired paranoid about this fucking dumpster fire called life and just thought I'd ask and spam your box best of luck hope you don't die

While I've had a couple of Irrationally Paranoid Thoughts about it, being traced back to this blog or my history of niche fetish fanfics in general is something I'm genuinely not worried about. I feel like people just don't deny things often enough. If someone ever tried to call me out for having kinks I'd just, like, lie about it. What possible evidence could they have? What even led them to make this connection? Why would I care enough to respond to insane, ultra-specific accusations that I ran this particular kink blog on this particular site? That's absolutely insane, even if they're, by some miracle, right.

[supersoldierhimbo]

INDEPENDENCE DAY (1996) SENTENCE STARTERS

feel free to change pronouns/context as needed!

If this isn't an insanely beautiful woman, I'm hanging up.

I think you should listen to this.

Hey, you have any idea how long it takes for those to decompose?

If you don't move soon, I'm gonna start to decompose.

You may inadvertently trigger an interstellar war.

Oh god, I hope they bring back Elvis.

Everyone's trying to get out of Washington, and we're the only schmucks trying to get in.

If I had known I was gonna meet the president, I would've worn a tie. I mean look at me. I look like a schlemiel.

Is that an earthquake?

Go back to sleep.

A countdown... wait, a countdown to what, ___?

It's like in chess: First, you strategically position your pieces and when the timing is right, you strike.

You punched the president?

There you go, thinking you're all that. But you are not as charming as you think you are.

I picked a hell of a day to quit drinking.

You're leaving now?

Los Angeles, New York, and Washington D.C. have been left in ruins...

Let's kick the tires and light the fires, big daddy!

Why we are on this particular mission, we'll never know.

But I do know, here, today, that the ____ will emerge victorious once again.

___, listen, pack your stuff and head for ___. Don't argue with me; just go.

___, why did I just send my mother to Atlanta?

This could be our last night on Earth. You don't want to die a virgin, do you?

Look, I really don't think they flew 90 billion light years to come down here and start a fight. Get all rowdy.

Smart man. Shot in the back, very sad.

Oh, yeah, great. Now he tells me.

I don't understand, where does all this come from?

How do you get funding for something like this?

None of you did anything to prevent this!

There was nothing we could do! We were totally unprepared for...

That's not entirely accurate.

As you can imagine, they... they don't let us out much.

This is the vault. Or as some of us like to call it: the Freak Show.

At this rate, we could be looking at the worldwide destruction of every major city in the next 36 hours.

Then we're being exterminated.

Oh, crap.

Oh no, you did NOT shoot that green shit at me!

Who's the man? Huh? Who's the man?!

Wait til I get another plane!

Welcome to earth!

Now that's what I call a close encounter.

Y'know, this was supposed to be my weekend off, but no.

And what the hell is that smell?!

I could've been at a barbecue!

But I ain't mad.

This is a restricted area. I can't let you pass without clearance.

You wanna see my clearance?

Maybe I'll just leave this here with you.

What do you want us to do?

Is that glass bulletproof?

They're like locusts.

Let's nuke the bastards.

Haven't you ever wanted to be part of something special?

I was part of something special.

What the hell are you doing?!

A toast, to the end of the world.

This is our victory dance.

Don't say "oops."

What do you say we try that again?

That word should have new meaning for all of us today.

We will not go quietly into the night!

We will not vanish without a fight!

We're going to live on!

We're going to survive!

You really think you can do all that bullshit you just said?

I have got to get me one of these!

However, that is a mistake, I am happy to say, that I don't have to live with.

Doesn't anybody have any missiles left?

Okay, boys, let's give ___ some cover. Gentlemen, let's plow the road!

Do me a favor.

In the words of my generation: up yours!

Hello boys--I'm back!

They're bringing us in.

When the hell was you gonna tell me?

Oops.

Time's up.

We're gonna have to work on our communication.

Nobody's perfect.

Payback's a bitch, ain't it?

I always thought things like this would kill me.

Take a look at the earthlings.

Y'all take care, all right?

Nothing but love for ya.

Think they got any idea of what's about to happen to them?

Can you get us out of here in 30 seconds?

I ain't heard no fat lady!

Forget the fat lady, you're obsessed with the fat lady! Drive us out of here!

We're not hit, we're not hit! Stop side-seat driving!

What the hell do you think I'm doing?

Go faster, must go faster, must go faster.

Elvis has left the building!

Any word from them?

Hold it, ___, I've got something on radar.

___... not bad. Not too bad at all.

Oh, so this is healthy?

Didn't I promise you fireworks?

[chososg1rl]

In The Back

Lavender Brown x Reader

Warnings: Smut, oral (reader receiving) and exhibition kink.

(Not proofread!)

Summary: I suck at summary’s but Lavender just eats you out in the back of the great hall during the Yule ball

The Yule ball is moved up to 7th year so reader and Lavender are of age.

Smut under the cut!

"Almost ready?" Lavender asked you, as she slipped on her white heels, "We've got to hurry."

"Almost!" You shouted from the bathroom where you were putting on your short light pink dress, "Eh, how do I look?" You asked as you stepped out of the bathroom. Lavender looked up at you, face turning into a full smile.

"Wonderful." She spoke, standing up from where she was sitting on your trunk, walking to you, "Perfect." She pulled you into a kiss, wanting more than just a kiss but you pulled away.

"Thought you said we have to hurry?"

"Ugh," she groaned, grabbing your hand, "Cmon let's go." She grabbed your hand and led you to the Great hall.

You and Lavender looked up, only seeing it as if it was an ice castle or something. She turned to you and grabbed your face, pulling you into a kiss.

"Keep the kissing to a minimum please." Harry groaned, "Some of us don't have a date." He walked past you both. You let out a laugh and shook your head.

"Shall I have this dance?"

"You shall." Lavender grabbed your hand and led you to the dance floor. Since you both got there late there was already rock and roll music rather than slow romantic music. You wanted more slow music but the music now will do.

Luckily, you and Lavender wore shorter dresses, for two reasons. One being, nobody will accidentally step on your dresses and two beings, easier to get off for later. Of course, it was Lavender's idea.

As the music played you grind down on each other, occasionally kissing each other. After a good thirty minutes, you both were insanely tired and your feet ached from dancing in heels. Your blonde girlfriend grabbed your hand and led you to one of the back tables of the Great Hall where barely anybody was.

"Shit, my feet hurt like a bitch." You sighed, grabbing the drink that was on the table. You took a sip before putting it back on the table. Lavender grabbed it too, taking a sip, "Oh, by the way, that isn't mine I'm just really thirsty."

Lavender spit it out back into the cup and wiped her mouth, "Seriously Y/N? Do you wanna get sick or something?"

"Depends, would you take care of me?" You asked, raising an eyebrow. Leaning in you kissed her, a small kiss but instead of pulling away, she grabbed your neck, pulling you closer. You grabbed her waist, holding it tight before she finally pulled away, when she did you let out a little bit of a whine. Embarrassed, you clasped your hand over your mouth.

"No baby," She stroked your hair, "Let me take care of you know, yeah?"

"I'm not sick but who am I to deny that." You smirked, right as you were about to stand up she pushed you back down. "Lav–"

"Let me take care of you, here." She smiled, pulling you into a kiss, "You ok with that?" You nodded quickly, "Words only baby, you know that."

"Y-yes Lav." You mumbled, pulling her into a kiss, wrapping your arm around her neck.

She kissed back, biting your lower lip before pulling back. She grabbed a random fork that had pieces of cake left, throwing it onto the cold floor. You looked at her in confusion before she lowered herself under the table. You knew exactly where she was going with this.

She pulled your seat closer to the table so the cloth was covering your whole lap, only for up the waist can be seen. She moved your dress up to uncover your already soaked panties.

"Already? I've barely done anything." Lavender teased from under the table. You giggled a bit before gasping at the feeling of Lavender pushing her fingers against your clothed clit.

Already feeling needy, you moved your hands into lavenders curls. You grabbed her curls, fisting them in your hand as she continued to kiss your inner thighs and time from time, rubbing your panties. "Love, please." You begged quietly, wrapping your arms over her shoulders.

"Be patient, I admiring your body baby." She praised, making you wetter than you were before, "You like that, don't you? Being told how beautiful you are?"

"Lav," you softly moaned, throwing your head back. She finally grabbed the waistband of your underwear, pulling them to your ankles, removing them completely. You opened your eyes again and looked around to make sure nobody noticed that your girlfriend was going down on you right now. Sure, you were embarrassed but the thought of someone possibly seeing you made you needier for the blonde.

She attached her mouth onto your clit, sucking on it ever so gently. Massaging your thick thighs as she licked your cunt. You tried to stifle your moans by using your mouth, it worked sometimes but a few slipped out. You were concreted on the table as if you had a headache so nobody would suspect anything.

"Hey Y/N!" You heard Cedric call from behind you, "What's wrong? The music too much?" He asked, resting his hand on your shoulder. You shook her head quickly.

"N-Nope, all good—oh god." Lavender had stuck two digits into you, slowly pumping them in and out, "Maybe it is a little loud," you laughed a bit, hoping to cover up your small gasps.

"Oh, maybe you and Lavender can go back to the dorm together? Speaking of her, where is she?"

"S-she's in the bathroom." You stuttered over your words as she continued her movements but quickening them.

"Oh, well I might be able to get them to tone it down a bit." He smiled before walking away. You let a little louder than usual moan. Lavender switched from her fingers to her tongue. Fucking you with her tongue as you fisted your hands in her hair.

You felt that familiar knot in your stomach as she continued to fuck you with her tongue. "L-lav, I'm close." You mumbled as you clenched your thighs around her head.

"Go ahead, let go for me, baby." She mumbled in your cunt, sending the last needed of vibrations to your bundle of nerves, making you completely let go. You leaned your head back, catching your breath as you came down from your high.

Lavender picked up the dirty fork from beside her before getting up from under the table. Grabbing a napkin and wiping your juices from her face.

"Good girl." She breathed out, putting down the napkin and pulling you into another kiss. You could taste yourself as you kissed her, leaning more into it. She placed a hand on your cheek, pulling you closer if possible.

"We get it, you too are in love." You heard a voice from behind you groan. You both turned to see Ron, "and don't think we don't know that she went down on you Y/N." He spoke, reaching in between your both grabbing his drink, "You guys didn't drink from this right?"

"Nope! We didn't." Lavender smiled, turning to you. He hummed before walking away.

"Lav!"

"Y/N!"

"Now, be a good girl and go down on me, yeah?" Lavender asked.

"Not here, let's go back to the dorms." You murmured, "Don't wanna get caught and get detention."

"You can eat me out anywhere, I don't mind."

Join my taglist!

[everyhowlmarksthedead]

JACKSON ‘JAX’ TELLER x READER ⨟ PROMPT

Anon #1 asked: Helloo! Could I request a jax teller x reader! A Jealousy one💕 Thank you

Anon #2 asked: 87+104 w/ jax teller please?

Prompts:

87. “Put on my kutte”.

104. “Don’t ask me to stop, I’m just gonna go harder”.

WARNINGS: NSFW, SMUT

Word Count: 2.5k

Author comments: This work wasn't re-edited, so I'm sorry if you find grammar mistakes! I hope you all enjoy. Gif isn't mine, credits to the author.

Tag list: @starrynite7114 ​ @chibsytelford ​ @dazzledamazon ​ @mara-mpou ​ @sammskellington ​ @gemini0410 ​ @1-800-imagines ​ @briana-mishell24 ​@sassymox @whyisgmora @aquamento @sadeyesgf @viviansafizada @samcrobae @jade770 @witchy-wish @rebel-without-cause-x @xx--day-dreamer--xx @spiced-reads @tita127 @ifoundmyhappythought @enamouravecleslivresetlechocolat @angelxshiba @destynelseclipsa @sheeshgivemeabreak @abbiesthings @knowles-morgan @lady-pswrld @minnicelli @marquelapage @bigcreatorwombatdreamer @jadesamhart @mycupoffanfiction @agirllovespasta @ottosuricato ✨ (if you wanna be tagged, send me a message!)

“Having fun with Rafi?”

His voice doesn't surprise you, giving him your back while you look for the tequila Marcus has asked for. You know exactly what's happening and you're trying to not laugh in his face, or this shit is going to be serious. But it's the same situation when Sons of Anarchy and Mayans have a party together. Rafi, president's right hand, is pretty kind with you and an interesting man, so yes. You have a lot of fun talking about something else than motorbikes, drugs, guns and bitches. Before you can turn around to leave the warehouse, a hand surrounds your throat, feeling Jax's chest accommodating against your back.

“I. Asked. You. A. Question”. He says into your ear, sounding a little angry and upset.

You know exactly how it works, how he works. But you're not in this shit anymore. It's been six months since you fucked for the first time. Sex is good. So fucking good. But you're catching feelings and you don't know if he cares about you in the same way. His jealousy confuses you, because no man can touch you but you gotta put up with whores flirting with him.

“Yes”. You just say, keeping some seconds of silence. “I'm having fun with my friend. Are you having fun with those bitches, uh? All th—”.

“We are not talking about me, darling”. His free arm wraps your abdomen, pushing you a little more closer, while his fingers squeeze your neck.

“We should”.

You know that these words have confused him when he puts away his hands to let you turn around. You're frowning your eyebrows, crossing your arms over your chest.

“I'm not… gonna blame you for anything. But if I don't have the right to tell you who can or who can't touch you, you're not gonna do it, Jackson”. You say with a firm tone of voice.

The man turns his legs to stretch a hand and close the door, locking it to not be bothered by anybody. You can see how his face turns from confusion to incredulity, from zero to one hundred, in just one second.

“I don't want anyone else, (Y/N)”.

“Then, prove it. But don't demand me a respect that you don't show me. You wanna be fuck friends? Cool. I don't have any… compromise or a relationship with you, I get it. But then, I can do whatever the fuck I wanna do”.

“That's it? It's a question of status?”

“It's a question of that I love you, Jax. I truly do. For who you are to me, not for who you are to them. I don't give a shit about your club and your matching outfits of badass bikers. I'm more into what you make me feel when we're alone, without having a knife hanging on your belt”.

“So, you're basically asking me to be my Old Lady”.

“No, Jax! Why the fuck you end up bringing everything to the club business? You're not the fucking president of the United States, and I'm not that… bitch. I wa—”.

“The club is my life. And if you don't understand it, it's because you don't know me, (Y/N)”.

You nod. You don't want to think about these words, because it's enough pain what you are feeling without thinking about it.

“Then, I don't know you. And I don't want to”. You sentence, before leaving the warehouse. And the party.

You would be lying if you say that you slept last night. Even if you didn't want it, his last words were chasing you the whole time, walking through your house and touring every room trying to get tired to sleep. But there you are, sitting at the table in the kitchen, holding a mug of coffee and having a sip. Your gaze is in the middle of nowhere, not knowing if you are disappointed or dealing with a broken heart.

The door ring pushes you back to the real world, dragging backwards the chair to get up from it. Covering your mouth with a hand, because of a loud yawn, you open the main door to find Jax there. He looks like shit too, with the same black bags under his eyes, the same clothes and messy tufts of blonde hair falling on his forehead. Supporting a shoulder against the frame, you cross your hands on your abdomen.

“Can I come in?”

“No”.

He nods biting the inside of his lower lip.

“I'm sorry about last night”.

“Yeah, me too”.

“Are you…?”

“Yeah. I'm sorry for telling you about my feelings. The last thing I was expecting was you shitting on them”.

“Listen…” He says rubbing his face with both hands, pulling back his hair. “I'm sorry for talking to you as I did. I really want you to be my girlfriend, or whatever you want”.

“Why now do you want it? What you didn't want it like… seven hours ago? What changed? That I sent you to hell? Is that? I didn't know you were the kind of child who wants his toy back, when someone else is playing with it”.

“Could you please stop being this rude?”

“This rude? Oh, do you mean the same ‘rude’ you were last night, Jackson?” Rolling your eyes, you chuckle.

“I'm telling you that I love you, (Y/N)”.

“Good, thank you. Anything else?”.

“Shit… If you were one of my brothers…”

“What? You would punch me?” Standing up from the door, you raise both eyebrows. “Try me, blonde bitch”.

Adopting the look on your face, he can't believe what he's hearing. But he likes it. He likes the fact that you're talking to him without giving a shit about his club, his job, or whatever other thing. Touring his lower lip with the tip of his tongue, he gives a quick step to grab your throat with ringed fingers, pushing you into your house to close the door. You're not scared, you're not even thinking about defending yourself because you already know what it's going to happen.

The blonde man crashes your lips with his, tangling your fingers on the Reaper Crew shirt under the kutte, while you walk backwards to the sofa. He urges you to sit on his lap with his legs among yours, pawing your body desperately while your hips swing over the growing lump under his jeans. The rage because of your behaviors and the feeling of alleviate get mixed inside your mouth, and your tongues giving a pulse to each other. Taking you off the shirt over your hair, his teeth attack one of your nipples to suck and bite it, while the other receives the attention it needs pinching it with his fingers. Yours getting tangled on his hair, gasping with closed eyes, looking for some friction for your core.

“Fuck, Jax…”

“Don't ask me to stop, darling, I'm just gonna go harder”. He growls onto your skin undoing his belt and the zip of his jeans.

Without asking for it, nor expecting, Jax thrusts two ringed fingers inside you using all his strength, until his hand finds your limits. A pleasure scream comes out from your mouth, with his pace speeding up.

“You're the only bitch I'm gonna fuck”.

“Call me bitch again and…”

You can't stop the threat, when he pounds you harder.

“You what, honey? I didn't hear you”.

You try to speak two times more, having the same result. Jackson is teasing you and chuckling because of your reactions, until you slap his chest.

“Fuck me, baby”. You get to say, looking for his blue eyes.

“Get up, take off those panties and put on my kutte”.

Following the instructions in silence, the Son takes the advantage to roll down his jeans and his boxers to his ankles, throwing away his own shirt. His right hand goes to his hard dick, the one you love to ride and suck, watching you so focused on the way you have to wear the leather kutte of his club. And he can swear that he hasn't seen anything more perfect than it. Jerking himself off, Jax looks at you kneeling over the sofa to sit on him.

“I would let you be my president”. He jokes rubbing the head of his cock against your clit, provoking you a soft moan. “I love how your pussy feels, darling… Warm as fuck, suffocating me, suffocating my cock. I wanna fuck it every night. I wanna fuck you every night”.

“And every morning”.

“All the time”.

Moving your waist from back to forward, you focus your attention on his parted lips begging for something else.

“Ride me, darling”. He asks, getting a little more comfortable on the sofa.

You bounce onto his cock without waiting for any single word, separating your legs over the cushion to go deeper. Jax is big, so big, and when you're more than one day without being fucked by him, you need to take some seconds to adapt your tightness to how hard he is.

“This pussy drives me insane… You're so fucking wet I could drown myself in it”. He mumbles putting a hand on your pelvis to bring his thumb to your clit, stroking it to make you feel better. “I could eat you out the whole time. You're fucking delicious”.

“I'm gonna fuck you like no one else can, my prince”. You mutter resting your forehead on his, before starting to move.

And you don't work him slow like sometimes, you go rough, fast and anxious hitting your g-spot every time you let your body fall down. Every pound brings you to heaven, drinking his pleasured grunts when your wetness wraps his sensible skin so fast that he doesn't have time to finish a moan and start another one. Your hips dance furious above him, trying to show to the Son one of the things you can offer him, although he already knows it well.

His free hand slaps your ass hardly, making your back get arched because of the stinging, screaming out his name every time he does it; as if he was punishing you. But you like it. You like that he doesn't control himself, wanting to please you every single second, while you ride wildly his cock. Your cock. He has you bewitched, rapturous, out of the world with his thumb jerking off your clit with the same speed that you're fucking him. No mercy, non-stop, careless. Just you two giving in to your most primal instincts.

Leaning over him you catch his mouth with your teeth, biting his lips before kissing them, with all his fingers getting nailed on your buttocks. Squeezing and pinching them, leaving some beautiful marks that are going to hurt like hell.

“Shit, darling… Look at your fucking precious pussy, engorging my big dick once and again… to the limit.. Does it feel good? Do you like my dick, uh?”

“Yes… I fucking love it. I fucking love when you grab my hair and fuck my mouth inside my car”.

“Yeah, you like it? How much, my princess? Tell me”.

“Fucking much, Jackson… I love when you wake me up fucking my pussy, always ready for you. And when you're so fucking jealous, grabbing my throat and impaling me until making me cum”.

“Do you like that much?”

You nod in silence, feeling your legs starting to shake close to the orgasm.

“What about my mouth? Do you like it?”

“Fuck… Yes, Jackson. I love when you eat my pussy… When you come from the club and eat my wet pussy on the counter… Your tongue licking me, oh, shit…”

“You taste so good, my love… I love your little pussy”.

“Fuck, Jax… I'm gonna fucking cum…”

“Go harder, baby. I wanna feel you”.

You speed up with every thrust to your center, being wrapped by the sweat and the heat of the moment, crying out his name with your back arched at the moment you reach the orgasm. He fills you up, maintaining your gaze and enjoying the look on your face. So pleased, so ecstatic, running out of air.

“Put on your knees, darling… I'm gonna fuck your mouth as you like”.

You have to take some seconds on top of him to process the order, before doing it, settling yourself between his legs over the floor. Jax grabs your head with both hands pounding your mouth with fury, while your lips wrap all his extension, hitting your throat once and again. It hurts you sometimes, but you love it. The Son presses his swollen glans against your limits when he fills your mouth up, feeling his hot cum spilling inside it. He growls loudly lifting up a little his pelvis, with your nose touching his skin, forcing you to take it all.

“Fuck, darling… Fuck… It feels so fucking good…”

When he frees yourself of his cock, and some threads of your saliva mixed with his seed falls down by the corner or your lips, Jackson urges you to lie down on the sofa while you try to recover your breath. And when you're trying it, cleaning your mouth with the back of your hand, his tongue finds your throbbing core sucking it as if it was going to be the last thing he was to do in his life. Placing both legs over his shoulders, he cleans every trail of your juices, drinking them so delighted that you're about tu cum a second time when he slides three fingers inside you.

“Oh, fuck, Jackson!”

Shrinking under his caresses, you bring down your hands to his hair, sinking his face into your pussy. He's devouring it like no one else could do it, keeping his eyes on you with his ringed fingers fucking you so painfully pleasant that you can't help but find the ecstasy again. The heat is suffocating you, but he doesn't stop. His tongue toures your entrance, before catching your clit among his teeth biting it gently.

“FUCK, JACKSON… JACKSON, PLEASE, STOP”.

You're inside a bubble of pleasure and you are about to cry. You have never felt this good, but he's making it up to you as hard as he can. Pulling out his fingers of your tired pussy, he licks them crawling above your body before tucking them inside your mouth.

“Taste them… This is the most fucking delicious thing I ever had the opportunity to relish, darling”.

Tasting yourself, you spread your legs to give him some space for his body.

“I fucking love you, keep it in your fucking mind, (Y/N)”.

[eyeless-cunt]

You want pain? perish <3

~ have some definitely not angst-ridden reader insert ~

TWs for uhhhhh fire, death, and I think that's it

Ever since you met BEN— which was an ordeal in itself, something you wouldn't have made it out of if you cared more about your own mental health —you have found that it's best to pre-screen anything you say. However he was being a particularly pissy bitch one day, messing with your electricity and causing your phone to go on the fritz for some reason you didn't bother asking about because you knew you wouldn't get a straight answer, and it... well, it didn't go well.

"For the love of fuck, stop being a cunt or I'll find you and throw a bucket of water on you." A simple threat, one that would have made anyone else a bit confused and laugh.

But this was different. This was very different. Because you knew something about the dumb gamer boy that had been tormenting you, and it was his severe aversion to water.

Why this was you'd probably never know, but you'd found it out after dropping a glass you'd filled upon him appearing behind you, making him skitter back into your carpeted living room where the puddle wouldn't reach him.

At least your threat worked, but you could tell by the static in the room that you had upset him.

"Oh, stay mad and die about it." You huffed, turning on the couch to put your back to the doorway as you scrolled through your Tumblr dash. He probably wanted you to feel bad, but he was the one that started this and so you would not be apologizing.

It stayed this way for days, though. He'd appear in the corner of your eye, you'd roll your eyes and call out an insult along the lines of "If you have a problem with me, speak up or fuck off." and he'd leave for a while. Till the next day.

Before that you'd occasionally hold a conversation, mostly him trying to scare you and you just... being yourself. "I'm too badass for you to scare me like that. Try harder." Which would spark a discussion, usually about him trying to figure out what would scare you and you trying to figure out the best way to make him mad in an entertaining way.

This was less entertaining, since all he did was act grumpy in the corner and give you a splitting headache. It was getting annoying, and you didn't have the patience to keep dealing with that and everyone you had to talk to outside of that. Plus your friends (friends? Maybe closer to accomplices, you mostly got together and planned crimes you never ended up committing) were starting to get worried about you randomly insulting something they couldn't see. Of course, it wasn't too out of character, but it was still a bit concerning.

So... instead of continuing to be stubborn, which was something you wanted to continue doing much more than what you decided on, the next time he showed up (a Tuesday) you were civil. Mostly. "Fine, since you're gonna keep being a pain in the ass, can we talk? What's got your panties in a twist?"

It was silent for a count of five.

And then you heard his voice. His stupid, static-y, distorted, cute, dumb voice. You hadn't missed it. No way. That wasn't missing talking to him, it was being annoyed with his attitude. Obviously.

"What, tired of dying? So am I. It's not fun to deal with things like that, huh?" He snapped at you, but it was really just a relief that he'd decided to use words instead of cryptic hallucinations.

"No, duh. Obviously I didn't like it, or I'd have just left you to mope instead of apologizing. So are you gonna keep being a pissbaby or can we move the hell on?" You crossed your arms and raised an eyebrow, which didn't seem to help the situation.

"... that was an apology? Seriously? You know I could kill you- drive you insane, end your life and move on with mine." He was getting more upset now. You could tell by the outlets starting to spark and smoke.

You decided to ignore it. "Like you have a life. If you did, you'd leave me the hell alone."

His voice raised. You swore you could smell something burning, but you were too busy staring him down. "You think I want to deal with your bitchiness?! You're cruel to everyone! I should have killed you the day I met you, I don't even know why I-" He was cut off by the carpet getting set aflame, but you weren't ready to stop this yet. If you were going to die, you'd do it on your own terms.

"Maybe you should've killed me! Cowardly bitch, won't even do it now! Just fuck off, I'll die how I want to die then." You turned and stormed deeper into the house- more specifically the kitchen. If you wanted you could use water to put it out, or just... be there. Away from the drama.

You winced as you heard a crunch beneath your foot, feeling glass drive its way into your heel. "Shit- fuck! Fuck shit cunt fuck shit-" You cursed the entire time it took you to hobble over to the sink, leaving a wobbly trail of bloody footsteps behind you.

The fire was growing bigger, now. But you couldn't hear any sign of BEN, so he'd probably gone. Left you here to go find someone else to torment. That was fine. It's fine. You're fine.

You lifted your foot up to the sink, propping it up on the metal rim to pick out the glass and wash it off. Not that it would matter in a few minutes, but you'd rather not be in pain the whole time.

Speaking of pain... fire hurt, didn't it? Damn. You hadn't thought that far ahead. The window above the sink didn't open- it hadn't since you bought this house. There might still be a path to the door, but that would take a chance of you admitting you didn't want to die to BEN and you'd rather-

Well. That left you in a bit of a predicament, didn't it? You cursed some more as you got the last of the glass out, turning on the faucet.

A few drops of water, but nothing else. Shit. You'd forgotten that the water company shut that off because of some 'burst line' or something. Assholes.

So instead of the water, you took a kitchen towel and wrapped it around your foot to go hobble somewhere else. The fire was making it a bit hard to breathe in there, anyways.

Shit, there wasn't anywhere else to go, really. Would this be the end? Would you still have to deal with BEN in the afterlife, or would you just fulfill the wishes of all those cunts in high school and go to hell? You didn't know. You didn't really want to know, honestly.

It was really hard to breathe, now. The fire licked at the walls of your kitchen, smoke filling your lungs. It wouldn't be long-

Suddenly you got a splitting headache, one that made you double over and lean heavily against the kitchen counter. Fuck. This would be the end, eh?

Dying in a fire because you fucked with an entity. Seems about right.

You didn't have long to think about it, though, because you blacked out. Probably hit your head on something, too.

...

...

...

...

...

...

Nothing. It was mostly nothing. You were vaguely aware of the fire as it consumed the rest of your home- with you still in it, but you were... already gone. It took a startlingly familiar shout to make you more aware, but you knew by then you were capital D Dead.

Or... were you?

Nope, definitely dead. But BEN wasn't happy about it, surprisingly. Why he wanted you to be alive you'd never know, but it was a little too late for that. Even though it... hurt to see him there, standing in the fire, looking just so... broken without you- you'd hardly known him. It was his own fault for getting attached. It was his own fault for being such a prissy bitch that you had to threaten him to get him to leave you alone. It was his own fault for making you clean up the mess he'd made. It was all his fault. It had to be. You hadn't done anything to make him act like that. Sure, you'd blown him off a couple times, but he'd met you. He couldn't expect you to show up to some dumb meeting in a park, especially when you had a perfectly good house to stay at. He couldn't expect you to want to go out into public, especially not with people around.

It was his fault, of course. It had to be his fault. You hadn't done anything but act exactly how you always acted, and if he couldn't handle it he'd have to deal with the consequences himself. If he didn't want you dead, he should've left you alone. Shouldn't have made you get attached to his dumb face, care about his stupid interests, listen to him talk about his idiotic games...

It was his fault. All his fault. -🎃

pumpkin i KNOW you intended for this to be angsty but i simply ,,,,,,,,,,,, reader deserved to die i dno what to tell you