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i-ship · 6 days ago

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Here goes, my take on Sam and Cait’s crazy relationship.

// With Outlander done filming, Caitriona is leaving Scotland for LA, and Sam has one last thing to tell her before she leaves //

Long, angsty, fluffy piece. Let me know what you think ♥️

/ One last time /

Caitríona adjusted the wine bottles on the table, her eyes scanning the living room one last time. A cluster of empty glasses and half-finished plates sat on the coffee table, remnants of the night’s laughter and chatter. She glanced out the window at the Glasgow skyline, the city she’d called home for almost a decade.

The farewell party had been her idea. A proper send-off, she’d said, though the truth was, she hated goodbyes. Especially this one. With Outlander wrapped and her next big projects calling from across the Atlantic, she and her family were moving to Los Angeles. It made sense—work was there, and a toddler wasn’t exactly built for Scottish winters.

The cast had all come. Rick brought a bottle of something expensive and bad jokes. Sophie brought her dog, who immediately tried to raid the charcuterie board. Everyone laughed, took selfies, and talked about the wild ride they’d shared over the years. Everyone except Sam, who’d lingered on the edges all night, nursing a drink and saying little.

Now, as the last of the crew filed out with hugs and promises to stay in touch, Sam stood by the door, looking as though he wanted to be anywhere else but here—or maybe exactly here.

“You’re still here,” she said, not looking at him. Her voice was light, almost dismissive.

“Didn’t want to leave things like this,” Sam said, his voice gruffer than usual. “Figured I owed ye a proper goodbye.”

She paused, setting down the glasses. “Goodbye’s a bit overdue, don’t you think? Or were you planning to skulk in the corner all night and call it a day?”

Sam’s jaw tightened, his hands buried deep in his jacket pockets. “Didn’t seem like the right time to talk about… this.”

Her laugh was sharp, cutting. “Oh, this? And what exactly is ‘this,’ Sam? Go on, enlighten me.”

He hesitated, his gaze dropping to the floor like he was reading invisible lines off the carpet.

“Look, Cait…” He let out a breath, rubbing the back of his neck. “I’m not good at this kind of thing.”

“Oh, don’t I know it,” she said dryly, folding her arms. “Go on, then. What’s rattling around in that head of yours?”

Sam’s mouth twitched, almost a smile, but it didn’t stick. “I just wanted to say I’m sorry. For… well, everything.”

Her laughter was sharp, not unkind but laced with disbelief. “That’s a bit vague, don’t you think? Care to narrow it down?”

“For us,” he said plainly. “For screwing it up. For letting you go.”

Caitríona’s arms dropped to her sides, her expression shifting. “Sam, it’s been years. Don’t do this now.”

“I know the timing’s shite,” he admitted, stepping closer. “But I couldn’t let you leave without saying it. You deserved better from me, Cait. Always did.”

Her lips pressed into a thin line, and for a moment, she looked as though she might dismiss him entirely. But then her shoulders sagged, and the tension in her voice gave way to exhaustion.

“Why now?” she asked, her tone quieter. “Why wait until I’ve packed up my life to say this?”

“Because I’m a coward,” he said simply. “And because I’ve spent every day since regretting it.”

She flinched at his honesty, her jaw tightening. “You had your chance, Sam. And you made your choice. You don’t get to rewrite history just because you’re finally ready to feel bad about it.”

“You think I don’t know that?” he snapped, his voice rising before he caught himself. “I know I made a mess of it. But I couldn’t just let you leave thinking I didn’t care. That I didn’t—” He stopped himself, his jaw working.

“Didn’t what?” she pressed.

“Didn’t love you,” he finished, his voice soft but unflinching. “Still do, if you want the truth of it.”

Caitríona stared at him, her eyes glassy but sharp. “Don’t say that, Sam. Don’t you dare.”

“I’m not trying to ruin your life, Cait,” he said, his tone steady despite the emotion brimming underneath. “I just… I needed you to know.”

Her laugh was bitter now, her hands curling into fists. “What exactly do you expect me to do with that, huh? Just pack up my family and run off with you? Fuck you, Sam.”

“I don’t expect anything,” he said. “I just couldn’t let you leave without hearing it from me. That’s all.”

She shook her head, a tear finally slipping down her cheek. “You don’t get it, do you? You broke me, Sam. And I had to put myself back together while you went off gallivanting with—God, with whoever would swipe right.”

“You think I wanted to?” he said, his voice cracking. “You think it didn’t rip me apart to see you with him? To watch you settle for Tony bloody McGill?”

Her eyes narrowed, her breath hitching. “Don’t you dare talk about him.”

“It’s true, though, isn’t it?” he pressed, stepping closer. “He’s safe. Reliable. A bloody beige cardigan of a man.”

Her laugh was bitter. “At least he stayed.”

Sam’s voice cracked as he snapped back, “Do you think I wanted to leave? Do you think I don’t hate myself for how I handled it?”

Her voice was sharp, cutting. “And what? You think that justifies it? You think it’s some grand tragedy that you wanted me but couldn’t handle me? Grow up, Sam.”

Her words were low, dangerous. “You think I wanted Tony because I wanted ‘safe’? I wanted you, Sam. I wanted the man who made me feel alive, the one who made me think I could have it all. And then you—” She shook her head, choking on the words. “You let me down. Every time.”

His frustration boiled over, a mix of anger and regret. He moved closer, his eyes fierce, but there was something broken in his gaze. “You think I don’t know that? You think I don’t know that I fucked it up?” His voice cracked, but he didn’t back down. “But you never let me back in. You never gave me the chance to make it right. Every time we came close to something real, you pulled away. And I… I didn’t know how to fix it. I was scared, Cait.”

Caitríona took a step back, her eyes wild, but she couldn’t stop the heat rising between them. She’d spent so long trying to get over him, so long holding onto the anger, but now, everything was crumbling. “Scared?” she echoed bitterly, her laugh short and humorless. “Is that what you tell yourself, Sam? That you were just scared? That it’s all my fault for not waiting around while you played the field with your—” She broke off, her eyes stinging with the memories of his casual flings, of seeing him with anyone who was willing. “With your models and your apps, and every other bloody distraction you could find. I had to move on.”

Sam stepped forward, closing the distance between them. His voice lowered, hoarse, raw. “You didn’t move on,” he said, his voice cracking. “You settled.”

She shook her head, tears streaking her cheeks now. “Don’t you dare,” she whispered, her voice barely audible. “Don’t you dare tell me I settled. Because I didn’t. I never settled. I tried to move on, Sam. I tried.”

The anger in his eyes softened for a moment, but the hurt in his voice was unmistakable. “I tried too, Cait. But it was you. Every damn time. I could never get you out of my head. Every damn love scene we shot… I knew what you wanted. You wanted me, just like I wanted you. But we couldn’t. It was torture.”

The intensity between them was almost unbearable. “I could feel your heart pounding, Cait. Every time we kissed. Every time I held you close, I felt you—felt your body pressing against mine like you couldn’t get enough.”

She stepped back again, almost as if she were trying to escape the suffocating air between them. But he followed her, the words tumbling out before he could stop them.

“I felt you every damn time, Cait. In those scenes. When we kissed, I could feel you pull back, like you were just as afraid as I was, but we kept going because neither of us could stop. I couldn’t stop wanting you. I couldn’t stop feeling you in every fucking kiss, every touch. The way your breath hitched when I got close… I couldn’t escape it. You never let me escape it.”

Her breath caught, and her chest tightened with a mix of longing and rage. “And then you left, Sam. And then you walked away from me. And I stayed. I stayed and built a life with someone who wasn’t you. And you—” Her voice cracked, the fury breaking apart. “You couldn’t love me enough to try.”

Her anger had shifted to raw pain, and Sam could see it now—he could feel it in every word she said.

“You were never supposed to have to choose,” he whispered, almost as if to himself. “I was never supposed to be the one to walk away. But I was too fucked up to give you what you needed. And it destroyed me watching you move on.”

He reached out, his hand grazing her cheek, his thumb wiping away a tear. “But this… this is the last thing I’ll ever do to you, Cait. I’ll never let you leave thinking I didn’t care. I loved you then, I love you now. I always have. Always will.”

She could feel his breath on her skin, his words sinking deep inside her, but she stopped him before he could take another step. She took a step back, her chest heaving as the tears finally broke free. “I can’t. Sam… I can’t.”

He didn’t let her go, though. He closed the gap once more, pressing her back against the wall, his body firm and urgent against hers. The air was thick, their emotions raw, the alcohol clouding their senses. He kissed her hard, his lips desperate, knowing that this was the last time—knowing they could never go back. She responded, her hands gripping his shirt, pulling him closer, as if they could make up for all the time lost.

The kiss was wild, furious, and all-consuming. His hands tangled in her hair, hers clutching desperately at his chest, as though letting go would destroy them both. Years of longing and regret poured into every movement, every breath.

He pushed her back against the wall, his lips trailing down her neck as she gasped, her hands tightening around him. She pulled him back to her, their mouths meeting again with a ferocity that left them both breathless.

It was raw, unrestrained, and utterly devastating.

“Sam… please. I can’t.” Her voice was broken, the weight of everything finally crashing down on her. “I can’t keep doing this. I can’t keep breaking myself for you.”

He stood there, his forehead pressed against hers, his chest rising and falling with each breath. “I never meant to break you, Cait. I swear.”

The room was heavy with silence, save for the soft sound of their breaths mingling in the tense space. Sam’s eyes were locked on Caitríona, her tear-streaked face a mix of pain, fury, and something deeper—something she couldn’t quite name, even if she tried. He could feel the air between them crackle, thick with everything they’d buried for years.

Sam’s hands cradled her face, his thumbs brushing the tears streaking her cheeks. His voice, raw and hoarse, cut through the haze between them.

“You think this is easy for me? That I don’t feel like a damn fool for wanting you even now? Every scene, Cait… every time we touched, kissed, looked at each other, I felt it. Felt you. Your pulse racing, your breath hitching—hell, I could barely keep myself together, and you knew it.”

She swallowed hard, her hands trembling at her sides. “And that’s supposed to mean what, Sam? That you were tortured, what, because you wanted something you chose to throw away?”

“No.” His jaw tightened, his words sharp with frustration. “It means I couldn’t stop wanting you no matter what I told myself. Every damn second of every day, you were it for me. And I couldn’t have you—not the way I wanted—not the way you deserved. You think I don’t hate myself for that?”

She laughed bitterly, stepping out of his hold. “Oh, you hate yourself? That’s rich, Sam. You hate yourself, and I was the one left picking up the pieces every time you broke my heart. Do you even know what that did to me? To let you back in, over and over, even when I knew you’d leave?”

His voice lowered, rough with regret. “I know. God, Cait, I know. But I couldn’t stay away. Even after you started seeing him, I couldn’t stop myself. And you couldn’t either.”

Her breath caught, and she stepped closer, her anger flaring. “You don’t get to throw that in my face. You think I wanted to keep coming back to you? To betray what little chance I had at moving on? You made it impossible, Sam. You made me impossible.”

His lips quirked into a bitter smile. “And yet here we are. Still impossible.”

The air between them crackled, the tension unbearable. She grabbed his collar, her voice trembling. “Why do you do this to me? Why can’t I just—”

Her words dissolved as his lips crashed against hers. There was nothing gentle in it, nothing held back—just years of pent-up longing and frustration spilling out in the space between them. She clung to him, her fingers twisting in his shirt as if anchoring herself to him.

He pulled her closer, his breath mingling with hers as he murmured against her lips, “Tell me you don’t feel it, Cait. Tell me it’s not still there.”

Caitríona’s chest tightened. He was right. She had felt it—felt the way her body responded to his even when they were just standing next to each other. She’d tried to block it out, tried to keep it professional, but the truth was, she couldn’t stop herself. She couldn’t stop wanting him, even though she hated herself for it.

Sam growled, his hands threading through her hair as he yanked her into him, pressing his lips to hers in a kiss that was like the explosion of everything they had kept locked away for so long.

It was frantic, desperate—two people who couldn’t hold back any longer. His hands roamed over her body, tasting, feeling, needing her. Her lips parted, giving him everything. Their kiss was a storm, consuming them both. She could feel his heart pounding against hers, could feel the heat of him seeping into her skin, her body responding without hesitation.

They stumbled toward the wall, and for a moment, the world outside ceased to exist. It was just them, tangled in this fight of passion, every touch sparking the fire that had been waiting to ignite for years.

Sam’s hands slipped beneath her shirt, pressing her body flush against his. She shivered, not from the cold, but from the electricity that raced through her, the way he made her feel more alive than she had in months. In that moment, she hated herself more for how badly she wanted him, but she couldn’t stop. She couldn’t pull away.

Her hands found his jeans, tugging at them with a force she didn’t know she had. The world was spinning, and the only thing that mattered was the feeling of him, of them together in a way that had never been possible before.

She gasped, pulling back for a split second, breathless, her voice trembling. “God, Sam… we can’t—”

“Please,” he whispered, his voice low. “Please. I’ve been waiting for this, Cait. Waiting for you.”

And she knew, in that moment, that she couldn’t fight it anymore. She didn’t want to.

As their lips met again, deeper this time, all the words left her, and she gave herself up completely to the feeling, to the chaos of what they were creating. There was no turning back now.

#sam heughen #caitriona balfe #sam x cait #samcait

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girlwithamissingpearl · 1 year ago

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I understand things have been dry in Outlander land but even desert dry has me smh. Ladies, if you have to try that hard to shit all over SH, I’m not saying it makes you a hater but it sure as shit doesn’t make you a liker.

Back after a bit- admit it, we all need to occasionally take a break- I feel I needed to pace myself during the drought. But after a bit of scrolling, I felt compelled to dive right in. Isn’t this fandom about fun, entertainment and guilty pleasure? That’s why I’m here. So why the endless posts from the SH haters? Do people dislike SH, enjoy the snark or just think the man is stupid?

So just for fun (or insomnia) I thought I would play a short game of SH: Stupid, Smart or just SMH?

1. SH and Cons/Private events for $

Why do people have such a problem with SH trying to make a living? Most if not all actors part of a series or movie franchise participate. In my opinion SH is doing it now, so he won’t need to in his 60’s to pay the rent. While most fans are priced out of the more exclusive events, all I can say is the paying fans are the only ones that never complain. Supply and demand. If any charitable component is part of the deal, great. So can we finally put a line under this?

Verdict: Smart as hell

2. SH always “Shilling” SS to his Fans and on SM

Uhm, he is the brand. It’s his company. Can it be a bit much? Yes. Promotion to the fan base and the use of sm is marketing 101. In order for people to try the product they need to know about the product. We can disagree as to his methods or success to date, but fans are not the only ones buying bottles. As for the constant and consistent presence of AN with SH during events? Suddenly they are a couple? WTF. AN is a business partner. He owns part of the business. They both work hard promoting SS, and so far it looks like they will continue to release more SS. Ladies, don’t put your lawn chairs away yet!😉

Verdict: Smart

3. SH and boundaries with his fans

Regardless of the letter you attach to SH, he is a recognized actor around the world. Definitely a people pleaser, in imho, he will happily take a selfie with anyone. Obviously, he never wants to disappoint any fan, but his lack of boundaries and security at events can be cringe worthy at times. If a female actor was touched, mauled, or asked to sign fans boobs or t-shirts it would be a #me too moment. Someone, anyone in security or a handler needs to be bad cop if he won’t. How far is too far?

Verdict: Stupid with a side of SMH

4. SH as a Philanthropist and Charitable Causes

This one really bugs me. MPC has raised over $6m for charity. SH’s name attached to any cause raises awareness and $. The BS from the haters who discount this based on the fact SH apparently never donates his own money is petty nonsense. Gentleman’s ride is one example. Agree it was his female fans that made it happen. And? This is my only fandom but SH is held to an impossible standard. Apparently he is a hypocrite in his support for clean oceans because someone on his team had a catered lunch using single use plastics. Great topic for discussion, but the man didn’t throw the containers in the ocean. Also let’s not judge a person’s commitment based on sm posts. SH can literally, yes ladies literally never win. Thankfully the causes he supports do. I dare you to disagree.

Verdict: Smart

5A. SH’s dating life

According to an extremely ardent part of this fandom, SH has dated😉 every fit blonde 👱‍♀️ within a 250 mile radius of everywhere. I wish that someone would keep track of all the mysterious initials and lack of any literal proof of these women. This is where I separate the snark from the hater’s. While I’m in owe of the investigative skills of some, and enjoy the gossip-even though mom thought gossip was a sin, sorry mom- not all women aka initials welcome the attention. Any woman save CB that SH is remotely warranted or not attached to, has an avalanche of hate comments and 💩emoji in their future, welcome or not. Personally, I believe SH, goes out of his way to protect the people he cares about, and perhaps even those he may not. I think we can agree he is not a monk. However an actor is entitled to privacy. Ginger Jesus included.

5B. SH ‘s Sexuality

From the beginning, 3 years for me, I’ve read posts about someone who knew a friend of a friend of a bartender’s friend who knew for a fact SH had a boyfriend. WTF. You know the drought is real when this bullshit gets recycled. We all know the question has been asked and answered by SH. More than once. Next.

Verdict: SH keeping his private life private: Smart as hell.

6. SH and the use of all things Outlander related

If you don’t get it, I don’t have the time and am too lazy to explain it to you.

Verdict: Smart. Smart as hell

7. SH and CB

The only real problem here is obvious. And I don’t know why the fans or even the haters- btw, I use the term haters like I do profanity- perhaps not the best word, but like GFY, FU, MF, C, etc. I’m lazy and it saves time and no confusion to whom I address. So where the actual f&ck is the audition tape we all want to see? You know the part of which I speak. If only the fandom investigators could put aside any petty differences and uncover the SH, CB chemistry kiss tape? I’m not saying it will be a unifying and CTJ moment, but it would give SH fans something to make the drought less….thirsty.

No verdict necessary. 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👨😚😉

And last but definitely not least…

8. SH and Thirst Traps

Ladies, because of Outlander and all things Outlander related, we’ve had the pleasure to observe SH from every view and lovely angle. Come on, if you 👀 closely it’s all there. Why the actual f&ck people in this fandom have a problem with his shirtless posts is beyond me. Not only is he promoting the results a good fitness regime can produce, he is literally, yes literally giving his fans something they want. And don’t even try me with- you’re treating him like an object. This is a 100% consensual relationship. And if the word “hater” seems harsh about the same gang that complains and shits all over his shirtless thirst traps, then please find me a better name.

Verdict: Smart as hell and thank you

So for those who may not get it, this post is silly and something for my handful of friends or any SH fan to have a laugh. If anyone has the patience to read the entire thing😉 So any comments are welcome, but to the people or person sending awful and cowardly anon messages: save your time. Or GFY. See what I did there?🤓

#outlander #outlander season 7 #sam cait #sam heughan #sassanach #men in kilts #men in kilts 2 #waypoints #clanlands

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