#cabur the shiro
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There's Something Lurking in the Guard Barracks
Summary: After a sudden spike of random animal attacks begins to plague the Coruscant Guard, Hound is put in charge of investigating whatever might be the cause of so many vode ending up in the medbay with their ankles bitten to shreds...
[Rhythm and Red Alert are @lost-on-kamino 's boys. Croissant is @gaeasun 's lad.]
THIS STORY IS ALSO ON AO3
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A mystery had reared its supposedly ugly head in whatever dark corners of the Coruscant Guard Barracks that no vod had ever bothered to map out. A mystery that lurked, stalked and bit whoever was unfortunate enough to catch its fancy. Attacked at such a speed and in such an unexpected inopportune moment, that none who'd been attacked had been able to see the perpetrator.
All that the victims knew was that they'd been alone in some unassuming area of the barracks, and that whatever had latched onto their poor defenseless ankles, certainly had jaws of steel at its disposal.
Animal attacks were no new occurrence when it came to the Guard. Animal attacks within their own base however... Well, there was a reason why the massiffs were allowed to roam outside of kennels at certain hours of the day. It wouldn't do well to let a plague of rats run rampant.
But this was no rat. At least not one Hound was familiar with.
It all began on a typical Prime Day, as most inconveniences for the Guard often did. Between cranky Coruscanti folks giving them a hard time because they didn't want to do their own routines, or the Senators deciding that overworking them on the weekend wasn't enough, Prime Day always opened up a new week with any given kind of problem.
Hound had been called in to speak with Fox for a reason or another (you never knew these days), and found his superior officer with a limp and a rather sour look on his face. Which gave away immediately that things were about to get really interesting for the head of the K9 Division.
"There's a pest problem in the vents." The marshal commander told him, as he massaged his aching ankle. "Something big's made its home in there, and it karking bites. I want you to deal with it."
"Did you see it, sir?" He'd asked out of curiosity, hoping to know what exactly he (and by proxy Grizzer) would be working with.
"...Not even a shadow." Fox hesitantly admitted, mouth twitching slightly as he mulled over it. "I'd just gotten into my office, set down the stacks of datapads I had to get through, and then the next thing I knew I was on the floor clutching my Force-damned ankle because something caught me from the vent behind my chair... Just barely heard it skitter away back in through the ventilation..."
"Uh... That's too bold for a rat, or even a tooka..." Hound scratched his chin in thought. "Have you gotten a rabies shot from the medbay, just in case?"
"Of course I did." Fox rolled his eye at this. "I may not like getting my jabs, but I'm not risking ending up a frothing twitching mess on my office floor just because I got bit by some unknown pest with whatever disease it caught outside..."
"Right, I'll try to figure out what bit you sir. I'm sure it's nothing good ol' Grizzer can't sniff out and deal with!"
It turned out to not be as simple as that. Whatever was hiding in the vents was not making itself available for removal without a fight. And unfortunately several other vode ended up finding themselves in the same situation as the marshal commander.
With limps and preemptive shots straight from the medbay. The line got longer every day, and by the end of the week Hound was at a loss for what to think of the whole situation.
He'd never encountered a critter that left him so stumped.
"I don't understand. I've dealt with all sorts of pest infestations before..." He bemoaned as he ate his lunch with Rhythm and Red Alert, right next to the riot trooper gear storage closet. "Rats, roaches, spiders... Kriff, even someone's runaway pet lizard that started breeding with the local population of geckos!"
"Well, not every animal operates the same way." Rhythm offered his thoughts on the matter. "Maybe we've got ourselves something a little smarter than a street tooka or a spoiled lizard."
"Or maybe something from down under came to the upper levels and we actually have a potential bio-hazard on our hands..." Red Alert gulped at the prospect of such an event taking place.
"That's what preemptive shots are for Red." Hound huffed. "Whatever is in the vents isn't some mutant from the under-levels. It wouldn't have survived climbing into the lower sector's vents all the way up to our level... Not with the measures in place to keep stuff like that isolated down there anyway..."
"You never know..." Red Alert shrugged, pausing to look up when he caught sight of Olly walking into the room looking a little flustered. "There you are! Olly I haven't seen you all morning!"
The larger riot trooper didn't respond, merely frowned and looked around the room before slumping his shoulders slightly.
"Hey, you seem down big guy..." Rhythm frowned as well, noting his friend's apparent distress. "Is something wrong?"
"Hm..." Olly shrugged. "S'fine... Just can't find something..."
"You can't find something? It's not like you to misplace your stuff..." Red Alert blinked. "You need any help finding it?"
"No... I'll... Has to be around here somewhere..." Olly shook his head and walked back out of the room, picking up the pace as he carried on looking for, well, whatever it was he'd lost. How odd.
Ah well, whatever was going on with the rather long named trooper could wait. Hound still had a mystery on his hands after all. He could help with another later.
"So, you're both helping me trap whatever is in the vents."
"Yeah sure!" Rhythm grinned.
"Uuuh I don't think--"
"Great, thanks guys. I'm thinking we block some of the vents and bait the one in our quarters. Then we trap it with like, some kind of container." Hound grinned.
"We don't even know how big it is!" Red Alert protested.
"Just big enough to fit in the vents, not too bad!" Rhythm shrugged.
"That's the spirit!"
With a plan as solid as this, surely the three of them should be able to catch one measly bitey creature. They were highly trained soldiers after all! The pride of the Guard no doubt.
Which is what they assumed, until they'd all ended up in the medbay getting their own jabs. Their ankles torn to shreds like everyone else's.
"I am starting to think Fox should call a specialist to deal with the vent problem." Croissant sighed as he finished administering the preemptive rabies shots.
"I don't understand... We should have seen it coming." Hound was at his wit's end. "Nothing should have gotten past us!"
"And yet, here all three of you are. This stuff isn't cheap you know..." He held up the vial of medicine, grimacing at how little remained. "And you need several more just to make sure you don't end up contracting the damn disease..."
"We don't even know if the thing in the vents can catch it, much less transmit it through a bite." Rhythm pointed out. "I didn't feel teeth, just really strong jawbones..."
"Jawbones that bit with such force they drew blood!" Red Alert whimpered.
"Grizzer wouldn't even go near the vent... What is in there that's scaring my massiff?!" The idea that some horror from the deep had really gotten into the barrack vents was starting to become more plausible.
"OOOOOOOOUCH!!!!!!!"
All four jolted slightly at the shrill scream outside of the medbay doors. Then, they gawked as Fox (for once clad in his officer grays rather than his armour) rushed in through the door, something relatively vent sized firmly attached to his unprotected backside.
"I wonder if it might be that thing?" Croissant deadpanned as he watched the marshal commander spin around gracelessly, in an attempt to shake off whatever spiky nonsense was currently trying to rip his shebs apart.
A minute later, the door opened again.
To everyone's surprise Olly was the one opening it, which was highly unusual considering the unusually tall riot trooper hated going to the medbay. The confused look on his face swiftly changed to one of absolute joy, which was another surprise.
He rarely openly expressed anything other than mild annoyance.
"Cabur! I've been looking everywhere for you!" without giving Fox so much as a warning, the larger trooper stopped him by the shoulders before prying the creature from it's grip on the marshal commander's aching behind. But not without a parting gift in the form of ripped piece of grey fabric and part of Fox's underwear as well.
"AAAAAACK!!!"
"Olly, what the hell?!" Croissant chose to ignore the happy riot trooper and the beast he was holding, in favor of helping their commanding officer off the floor where he'd fallen after getting the creature pulled away from his rear-end.
"What even is that...?" Rhythm blinked as he stared at his friend.
Olly paused to look at the others. He held out the animal in question, revealing its spiky shell, long gangly limbs, spiny tail, prehensile neck, and rather unpleasant looking snooty face.
It appeared to be a turtle of some kind. Which was likely why Olly wasn't afraid of holding it.
"This is Cabur. She's a shiro that I found in one of the upper floors in a public fountain..." He offered as a form of explanation. "And I've been looking everywhere for her. I was afraid she'd gotten lost."
"I... What was a shiro doing in a public fountain?!" Red Alert stared at the creature in horror, flinching when it appeared to glare at them and snapped it's jaws threateningly. "They're indigenous to Naboo, not Coruscant!
"Nevermind that, you knew what could have been biting everyone and you didn't say?!" Hound stared incredulously at Olly.
".... You never asked." Olly shrugged in turn.
"What the hell is wrong with you?!" Hound put his face in his hands. "This whole time you knew and could have helped.... Everyone's ankles are ruined! Fox's ass is ruined! No offense ori'vod..."
"My ankles and shebs hurt less than the jabs..." The marshal commander grumbled. "My dignity however..."
"Our stash of preemptive medicine is nearly gone." Croissant pointed out. "Which might be a problem in the future..."
"Well... At least if that thing has rabies, we won't catch it anytime soon with all the jabs we got?" Rhythm offered, hoping to lighten the mood.
"Turtles can't catch rabies." Olly pointed out calmly.
"....Kark, then yeah, this is terrible." The communications officer groaned. "All of this worrying for nothing..."
"Again, you never asked." Olly rolled his eyes and walked out of the medbay, turtle menace in tow. At least he seemed quite happy with the situation.
Maybe next time something like this happened, Hound would decline any pest related problems.
#Eps Writes#star wars#the clone wars#commander fox#sergeant hound#clone ocs#communications corrie rhythm#riot trooper red alert#clone medic croissant#riot trooper olly olly oxenfree#cabur the shiro#In which olly gets a pet and it becomes everyone else's problem :)#wrote this one for a quick giggle
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