#c:starfire

[chsesteinarchived]

@katasstrophee  asked: titans + favorite female character 

kori anders/koriand’r/starfire

❝you may have gone through some bad shit, i may have too i don’t know, but what i do know is nobody manages alone. i don’t have to remember much to remember that❞

[destrxctionsdaughter]

L

starlight, star bright (won’t you kiss away my tears tonight)

this is a month late and i’m operating on new teen titans (circa the 80s) starfire instead of nu52/teen titans cartoon which is your starfire and i’m sorry i got carried away and i just really love ntt starfire so much.

Star Fire. Starfire.

Thatis not the name of Koriand'r, Princess of Tamaran, but it is the closestequivalent in English. You may call her Kory or Kori. Or simply Princess, ifshe is feeling entitled.

Shedoes not like the name Star. 

Not because what the wordspeaks of is not beautiful. They glimmer like diamonds in an endless blackscarf and they stretch out farther than she can ever imagine. They are gloriousand beautiful. But they always remind her of things best forgotten.  

Soby the time Cass sits next to her on the porch without saying a word, Koriwishes to go inside. She has seen the stars enough.

“You are- sad,”Cass manages to say out loud, her face screwing up as she tries to form thewords, “W-Why?”

Korishifts uncomfortably, leaning away from Cass, but Cass rests her body intoKori’s side, waiting for an answer.

Alump in her throat burns hot, before Kori swallows it down, “Because I- Ido not understand.”

Shekissed Robin when she was younger and he gave her the Earth language ofEnglish. She has been speaking it for many years, but sometimes, she does not-understand.

Herfriends call her siblings Blackfire and Darkfire.

Andthough those are the closest translations in English, Kori thinks, turning awaysoftly, that those who use them do not understand.

Thosesame friends, they laugh and say her name is a– spice. That her home is a–fruit. That their names are better Star and Dark and Black rather than Komand'rand Ryand'r.

Itis not that she doesn’t understand the apathy to her language; after all, sheis a foreigner to all their languages and she often speaks their tongue wrongand misunderstands plenty. If there is one thing she has learned from Earth itis that people wish to see things in black and white. They wish to deny theirfeelings and hide and simplify what is.

Butin Tamaran, that is not how things work. Their names do not mean Star and Darkand Black. Tamaranian is a language of feeling and power. It is universal andcannot be translated.  English does not account for the emotion in words. Koriand Kom are not simply light and the absence of. They are- more.

Here,on Earth, they tell her it is okay to hate her family for what they have doneto her. They tell her that she should not feel loyalty to those who have hurther.

Butit is not that simple.

Yes,years ago, her family traded her to the Gordanians for the peace of theirplanet. She was hurt. And used. And sometimes, she is still angry about it,rage bubbling like lava in her bones, her knuckles turning white through theorange of her skin.

But,Kom and Ry, My and Lu: they are her family. Others would begrudge them for theyhave done to her, but Koriand'r does not preoccupy herself with such notions.She hates and loves with equal passion and allows herself every feeling inbetween. And she will always love them. No matter what they have allowed topass.

Earthhas been good to her, but here, she is an alien, foreign to customs and wordsand traditions.

Andthere in the stars, is the Vega system and. there, the eighth planet from theirsun, no matter what has occurred in the past, is and will always be her– home.

Andsuddenly, Kori notices that Cass is crying.

BecauseCass knows about forgiveness and missing things you shouldn’t miss and aboutthe fact that sometimes that words are too much and not enough and without themyou are nothing and, with them, you lose too much.

Korihasn’t said anything, but she doesn’t need to. Kori wears her emotions on hersleeve and Cass reads them. It is the closest thing to Tamaranian that Kori hasever found here.

“IfI could give languages by kissing,” Kori says sadly in Tamaranian, “Iwould give all of them to you.”

Cassleans her head on Kori’s shoulder, her voice still hitching with tears, readingKori from her body instead of her lips, “Me- too.”

Thestars out in front of her, a million light years away with just enough timepassed to dull the hurt, Kori misses the warmth of Tamaran, the golden glow ofher people’s skins and the smiles of her parents. But with Cass by her side,she knows that it is okay.