#c:malcom

[psujanuaryrhodes]

Wait you went to a cult recruitment? That is kind of a cool story if not scary. But that also doesn't sound like a great memory to have listening to such an amazing song.

Oh my god, yeah. This one time I was at a meeting that lowkey was probably cult recruitment if we're being honest, but that's another story. There was this point where they were like "okay everyone, time to sign away your life savings in your own blood, here's the contact and a needle to prick your finger" which is when I realized alright time to bounce. Put on my headphones, try to sneak out real quiet like 'cause I don't know these people, they might try to off me if they catch me leaving. Long story short, I tripped over someone's backpack on my way out and faceplanted into a trashcan. Chipped two of my teeth, whole time Hollaback Girl is still playing through my headphones. Now every time I listen to Gwen Stefani, my teeth hurt. But you know, Twilight is cool too.

[psutina]

Can you come to do a reading on Eddie? It’s been a while, plus I need to know if he would be up for me bringing another cat into the mix. @oinkoinkzoomals

[stylisthummel]

@oinkoinkzoomals replied to your post “You’re playing spin the bottle. Who are your top...”:

😘

​Maybe you should come over then.

[aliciarpss]

“Do you love me? It’s a simple question.”

Crumbling Relationship Starters || Accepting

“You wanna know, if I love you or not?” Malcom questioned, while looking over at them. Thinking about it for a moment, he sat down and leaned his head against the wall. “If I knew how to stop, I wouldn’t. What we are doin’ here, can’t be good for either of us.”

[psutina]

I totally get that. I'm the same way. I'll take Judy but I don't know who to kick out! I love all of my villagers!! I hoard everything, especially clothes. Give me all the black outfits. My former teen self would be proud. Once a goth, always a goth.

Same, but I still like to check in every so often and then become obsessed again for 4 months. Cycle of life, you get it? Judy is my mortal enemy and I’ll fork her over to you as soon as she says she wants to leave. Please take her, I want to get Lobo instead. All of the other assholes on this island are content to live in their one room houses. More power to them but I need stuff. I love stuff.

[aj-rpsss]

tag drop for malcom carr.

[kalvin-pitched]

bitchcantchang replied to your post: Your boyfriend is super annoying. You can do so much better.

Does that mean that you /do/ think your boyfriend’s annoying?

I'm going to flick you in the forehead, Malcom.

[stylisthummel]

📲 malkurt

KURT: Hello to my favorite cat whisperer, I think Glinda is mad at me?? She has been ignoring me when I come home, she’s been walking away from my pets and she won’t wear her new dress I made her. I need a reading on her, stat!!

@oinkoinkzoomals

[stylisthummel]

Well, I am glad my sister won't mind since she likes another boy.

@stylisthummel replied to your post “Which Priv individual do you think of when you...”:

Please don’t sleep with my sister and me.

​I can do a first come, first serve basis? But then you've gotta be the one to tell your sister she's off the list, I don't wanna hurt her feelings.

[psutina]

I love Animal Crossing! I really got into it during the pandemic and I was out of work. I check on my island every now and then. but it's been a while. Judy is a national treasure. I personally don't have her. It always bothered me that I had to be the one to put all the bells towards the bridges and inclines. Like what were they spending their money on? Their houses rarely changed. Were they forever in debt to Tom Nook?

Listen up, folks. I like to think of myself as an easygoing guy. If you wanna express some negative thoughts, have at it. We're all just humans cohabitating together, I'm not gonna tell you to shut up. But today, I'm drawing a line. I'm sorry but I've had it. Enough of my Animal Crossings villagers and their audacity to shame me. Yeah it's been 8 months since I visited, Judy. What of it? Be grateful I came back at all, since I'm apparently the only bitch on this island who knows how to clean up weeds. If you've been thinking about picking up your game again, this is your warning: don't. They're just gonna be jerks and make you regret putting your hard earned bells into building them bridges.

[stylisthummel]

Pomegranate. I have Mango chapstick too, if you want to taste that.

Do you like grapefruit or pomegranate flavored chapstick more, 'cause I can do either.

[stylisthummel]

KURT: I don’t know!! I would never hurt her.

KURT: thank you, that works for me. She would have her own reality tv show if she could.

KURT: that does sound like her.

MAL: What're you doing to my best girl, Hummel? MAL: jk (or am I?). I can squeeze in an emergency time slot on Tuesday at 3:17 if you're free. I love rooting around in her head, it's like a reality show starring you. MAL: It could also be something totally boring like you moved your couch 3 inches to the left and it ruined her life. We've all been there.