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#by which i mean he doesn’t want his friends screaming about sex in the library while he’s on the phone which is Fair
isogenderskitty · 7 months
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it has to be said, it’s very funny that despite the title of “nerdy prude” ruth is in fact the least prudish person on the entire planet. if she was any hornier i think she would just explode on the spot
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angelinpiink · 2 years
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male aot characters as fuckbuddies + nsfw headcannons ࿐ྂ。
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fem character version here!
❥note: appalogies for the wait! and the shortness of jean's nevertheless i hope you all enjoy!
❥ warnings : as the title stated the following content is intetneded fof mature audeinces only
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eren
acts like an absolute asshole to you when your other friends are around, given that the two of you were friends before he’s adamant about keeping up the appearance that nothing has changed because he knows and Connie and Jean  are bound to make fun of him for it. though, if you ask him to tune it down he will if he notices that it’s hurting your feelings.
He only teases you with the intention of starting an argument which in turn will make you mad..he finds you irresistible when mad the reason being that  your arguments with often end in sex, you’ll be bent over the bathroom counter  of whatever friends house you two were hanging out that day.
he’s a brat tamer all the way, will never ever tolerate you misbehaving and you know just what buttons to push to make him mad just as he does for you, it doesn’t matter where you are are or what you’re doing if he wants you he’ll have you and when you misbehave the desire to put you in your place only increases. “Huh? had so much to say before why so quiet now slut?..” he’ll say as you look at him, anticipation for what he’ll do leaving you at a loss for words. 
“good thing I know just how to fix that.” “gonna make you scream for me and let you finally use that mouth of yours for somethin’ good.” he’ll say. pushing his fingers past your folds fucking into you while the other hand rubs at your clit. eren fills you up so good, fucking into your cunt hell tug at your hair listening to your babbling. “too much..please slow down.. .” you say, fighting the urge to scream out the moment he shoves his fingers deeper. 
“No.” Eren is not the one to take orders so he’ll likely only stop as a means of punishing you, forcing you to beg for him to continue. expect lots of dick pics, as well as dirty texts eren definitely thinks about getting to fill your cunt 24/7 and he almost always expects you to return the favor.
Though you two aren’t in a committed relationship he’s definitely possessive—not a big difference from when the two of you were friends actually. though he may never ever say it outright he really only wants you to himself.  he often  gets jealous of your other friends & even coworkers.  so much so that he will probably send vidoes of him fucking your pretty face and coating it with cum to any guy he thinks is trying to get too close to you, just to serve as a reminder that only he knows how to take care of you.
armin
Given armins timid personality I imagine that your relationship as fuckbuddies likely started off from the two of you being classmates, something innocent for sure, that would take a turn for the better. You were surely the one who initiated the first hookup during one of your many late night study sessions but that cannot be said for any that followed. 
 I imagine him Being extremely  gentle  as he is and eager to please you he’ll do whatever it is that you ask of him. he’s unable to control himself around you, poor poor armin gets so needy from just knowing youre near, his cock will get stiff and achy and it won't take long before he’s begging you to let him fuck your tits till he cums all over them, though of course he wont be so direct about it so you’ll have to coax it out  him.   
 He's so whiny and needy, it's just adorable. Armin is  afraid of hurting you with his big cock, but also can’t help himself cause he wants to fuck you so bad :( he will applalogize as he listens to your whimpers claiming he’s too big, his bulge showing in your tummy “s-sorry…” he’ll choke out, still making no effort to slow down as he buries himself deeper and deeper inside you. 
Armin is secretly a pervert, and will definitely let you give him a handjob under the table in the library. With every movement of your hand he’ll be left  Making poor attempts to to muffle his whines as he fucks into your hand. If you two are caught Armin uses his innocent reputation to his advantage as there is no reason anyone would suspect him of allowing that sort of thing to occur.  
reiner
The two of you would likely be roommates of some sort, seeing you around  your shared apartment as often as he did lead to him developing an attraction to you.. Spoiler alert: Reiner is an absolute sucker when it comes to seeing you do domestic chores, like cooking, doing laundry and cleaning though it may be surprising that such mundane tasks would have such an effect on him. Reiner definitely wants to make you his wife one day but for now fucking you on the regular will just have to do.
Reiner is impartial when it comes to people knowing about the two of you hooking up, whether or not you tell anyone things will be just fine between you too. Though your  shared friends are very easily able to notice the effect the two of you have on each other. The way you’ll squeeze your legs together whenever he’ll place a hand on your thigh or the  painfully obvious bulge in reiner’s pants and the even more apparent fact that the two of you excuse yourself mere seconds after one another. 
 He’s a huge perv, all it takes is you existing to trigger the dirtiest thoughts in his mind. Needless to say..Reiner of course has a  breeding kin.  seeing how skilled you are at home-making causes to him want to fill you up with his cum and watch you get plump with his child. And he’s not afraid to voice it either. “Gonna breed that sweet cunt, would you like that darling?”  It won't take long before he makes the decision to act out said fantasies. 
Pushing apart your thighs, taking his achy cock into his hand and guiding it to your entrance, he’ll let out a groan, feeling your walls clench around him as though entrapping him and enticing him to push himself deeper. Reiner lets out a groan, head dipping back as his pace speeds up. This of course will send you into a frenzy unable to contain your whines. You’ll be begging him to fuck into you harder and he wont stop until he’s had enough…though im sure we know that’s not possible. 
jean
Jean is an absolute lover boy, meaning the two of you becoming fuckbuddies likely was simply the result of onenight stand after one night stand. Don't get me wrong, Jean of course isn't in any way heartless when it comes to women which is why he rarely ever hooks up with anyone twice let alone exclusively, you of course being the only exception to such rules as he knows that that sort of thing leaves room for attachment. Something he wouldn't mind having when it came to you. 
He doesn't care much for keeping the nature of your relationship private, and would gladly parade you around the campus of college if it weren't for his little group of fangirls, who’d give anything to be in your place so as a means of keeping you protected he chooses to only share it with close friends who would have likely caught on anyways. 
such a soft dom all the way, so expect lots of praise before during and after sex. He’s all for your pleasure, treats you like an absolute princess. His favorite thing of all is to have you on his lap, while pushing his fingers into your cunt “ that’s it good girl you're taking these fingers so well..can't wait to fill that pretty pussy up.”
his scruff tickling your face, he whispers into your ear letting his free hand grope your sides. You better believe he’ll have you cumming again and again until your thighs are trembling before fucing into you with his cock. make sure  you feel good is all that matters to him after all. 
zeke
To put it simply, zeke is your sugar daddy..your relationship had always been sexual in nature from the moment you met, so it comes as no shock that the two of you would hook up regularly.  He provides the funds for your shopping sprees and will take you out for extravagant dinners if he’s feeling gracious. Though that may sound like the perfect foundations for an exclusive romance, from the moment your relationship began he made it clear that no commitment would ever stem from it as he had a wife back home.  And you were more than okay with that. 
This of course means that he's quite eager to keep your relationship private. Being that he cares about his reputation, there's likely  loads of hush money involved.  He will only call you to hook up at night either at your place or a fancy hotel but never at his own for obvious reasons. There's not much communication between the two of you outside of that. There may be the occasional sending of nudes or texts but this is only likely to occur when he’s been drinking. You can bet that   too will lead to a hookup. 
 He likes to have you ride his thigh.the sight of your thighs trembling while you drag your slobbery cunt along his trousers gets him so hard. He’ll rest his hands on your hips and guide them. The pace of your hips speeding up.
“Such a dirty girl.”  he’ll say forcing you to hold his gaze. He really  doesn't care how flustered you are. he’ll make you continue until you're left a whiny mess “p-please fuck me..”  Once he’s satisfied he’ll give you just what you want.  Burrying his cock past your  folds and fuckig into you over and over before filling you to the brim with his cum. 
after sex he’ll pop a cigarette in his mouth and complain about his wife, letting you know that she doesnt compare to you in the slightest and that he’s always thinking about your sweet cunt whenever he’s focred to part from you.  But even still once again he’ll go back home to her and you’ll be left waiting until he shows up at your door or shoots you a text. 
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here's my masterlist!
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vminity21 · 3 years
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Blindsided | jjk
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Pairing: bestfriend!jeongguk x female!reader, rival!taehyung x student!reader, exfriend!jimin x reader
Word Count: 5,586
Genre: angst, fluff, smut, college!au, f2l!au
Warning(s): profanity, unprotected sex, oral (f receiving), nipple play, taehyung is a jerky jerk at first ; Rating: 18+
Summary: When the project you so hoped to accomplish for the Model United Nations club is taken by your arch-nemesis, Kim Taehyung, again, you can’t help but confront him about the bubbling tension you’ve gathered towards him. With your sidekick, Jeongguk, all is well in your world, and when thoughtful presents are left lingering here and there, your heart begins to leap for the wrong culprit- when the real secret admirer has been right before your eyes all along.
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It’s enough to want to make your head explode; shoving your palm to rub along your forehead, an exasperated huff brushes past your lips when the tip of your pencil breaks upon your homework. “Ah, groovy,” you whisper, deciding that maybe a five-minute break doesn’t sound too shabby after all. Chair sliding against the carpet from where you rise to your feet, your eyes scan the library for a pencil sharpener; once discovered, the short trek begins, avoiding the tiny glimpses within the room you happen to pass by. The noise of the turning machine is loud enough to make you cringe, frequently checking until your pencil is sharpened to your liking; with one more spin, you’re too focused on what you’re doing, you nearly scream when large hands grasp your shoulders.
“Boo!”
“Oh sh-, oh Guk, you- urrrrgh,” your voice is quiet enough to not cause any squinted looks of the librarians, and the heightened pace of your heart begins to dim at the sound of your best friend’s gentle cackling- his nose scrunching from the way his laughing smile buries into his long sleeve. “I will get you back, eventually, so help me God-”
“Hey, hey-” This time when his hands find your shoulders, he gives them a tender squeeze- a calming effect he’s practiced many times, “All’s well that ends well, my friend,”
“Okay, well I disown you as my friend, how ‘bout that,” you tease, turning on a heel to saunter back to the table you’ve been glued to for the past hour.
“You can’t do that! Who’s gonna help me with my math homework?” Jeongguk jogs to catch up with you, plopping into the seat across from you before sprawling his arms forward to rest his chin. His hair nearly falls beside the corners of his eyes before puffing them out of his face, yet the way his puppy expression looks up at you, you force yourself not to give in.
“Who’s that tall guy that sits beside you in calculus?”
“Namjoon?”
“Ask him,” you shuffle through your paperwork trying to find the spot where you left off, also scrolling through your laptop to find a few links to research, leaving an observing Jeongguk whose eyebrows furrow when he reads what is written so far within your notes.
“I thought you were doing your project on Scotland this year-”
“Ah, changing the subject, are we?” Your best friend is highly unaware of the earlier event that took place in class which initially lead you to the location you are now, refusing to think about the person that your grudge is associated with.
“Face it, you can’t last an hour without me,”
“You’re right,” you stifle the growing smirk wanting to spread upon your mouth, “I can last two,” frustration reveals itself in yet another form of a sigh where your arms fold across your chest, forgetting the fact that a confused Jeongguk is still watching you with a playful scoff.
“Anyways, back to what I said, what happened to Scotland? You haven’t shut up about it since your last conference,”
“I mean, are you surprised?” You glance at zoned eyes, him chewing the corner of his mouth in obvious concentration- after a minute, you speak, “Remember what happened last year?”
Recognition clouds his expression when he releases a knowing groan, “Oh no, not again,”
“Yes, again. He literally knew I wanted to do my project about Romania last year. I was so passionate about their laws and what they stand for and sure enough, what did he do? He chose it. I swear I never win with him,”
“[Y/N],” Jeongguk collides his long fingers to his face, “If this is still about him being the president of MUN, let it go,”
“It’s not!” You’re a horrible liar, and you know it, for the way Guk tilts his head to stare between his fingers, you lean back, shrugging your shoulders whilst hugging yourself tighter, “It’s not,”
“Okay, so I’m guessing he chose Scotland this go-round, huh,”
“What do you think,” you can’t even make eye contact when guilt weighs heavy relating to your suppressed anger- you’re tired of living in Kim Taehyung’s shadow- someone you’ve known since elementary school, and it seems no matter what you do, he’s always one step ahead, leaving you in the quicksand you’ve fought so hard to stay out of.
“Well, it’s not the end of the world. And, South Korea is obviously not a bad pick,” he taps the sheet of where he read your bullet points.
“I know,” you murmur, gaze dropping toward your binder, resting open waiting for you to continue the homework you’d rather procrastinate.
“Hey,” it’s been a few minutes of drawn-out silence other than the loud thoughts swarming within your mind, and the soft fingertips of Jeongguk’s press lightly on the back of your hand. Grinning at him, he investigates your stare, “Don’t let him get to you. There’s plenty of opportunity in this world. You should know that.”
Sincere moments are what made this friendship so special in the first place, and after another hour of penning down whatever distracted information Jeongguk helps you with, you gather your items, hugging him close as always before treading to your dorm. Sweat beads glisten along the lining of your hair the following week; you slow your steps enough to catch your breath- legs still burning from the attempted mile you ran within the school’s gymnasium. As much as you hate to admit it, exercising alone (which others don’t seem to understand) can be comforting especially when the project for MUN seems to be drowning majority of your list of things to do.
To make matters worse, the taunting deep voice of a certain individual enters the echoing gym with a smirk on his lips that imitate the way his eyes peer down at you as they have for years. His square jaw only locks when he halts his steps, and the tension of your rigid shoulders are highly noticeable, and you hate how obvious he makes you flinch.
“Is there a reason why you’re stalking me, Mr. Kim,” you state it as though it’s a fact not so much a question. Swiping some perspiration off your cheek with your shoulder, you sprint to where you left your water bottle, taking a swig without removing your glance from the dark strands of hair fluffing over his ears. He is handsome, yet the attraction you feel toward him makes you want to wince; you bite your tongue- getting kicked out of MUN is not a risk you’re willing to take this moment in time.
“I didn’t realize concern could be mistaken for stalking,”
“We can agree to disagree,” you shrug, breaking eye contact to fumble with your gym bag, feigning like you are searching for something- maybe your sanity which would be a joke you’d banter with Jeongguk if only he was present right now. Taehyung observes you with squinted eyes, carefully shoving his hands in his pockets, wetting his lips before clearing his throat,
“Correct me if I am wrong, but I sense some strong feelings of hostility-,”
“Why are you here,” You’re not one to interrupt, but you are borderline suspicious that he very well knows of why you’ve been fuming smoke ever since he stole, yet again, the subject of choice you had been anticipating talking about. “Seriously, Taehyung, you and I both know that this isn’t random. And cut the fancy word bullshit-”
A staccato huff brushes over his lips, eyes scanning the bleachers off to the side to avoid your gaze, “[Y/N], just- can you- just hear me out-”
“Hear you out? You want me to hear you out.”
“Please,” he appears panicked, but you are too angry to fully hear his plea, so stepping forward, inches from his face, your teeth are grit, pressure tenses your jawline.
“What makes you think you deserve for me to listen or much less believe anything that you have to say?” You keep your voice low, for no matter how much you want to expose Taehyung for what he’s really done, you can’t bring yourself to do it, so your voice remains low enough for only him to hear. “You lost all my respect the day you bribed Jimin to rig the club’s president results,” hence why you haven’t spoken to Jimin, your ex-friend when he, out of guilt, revealed why Kim Taehyung beat you at the one thing you wanted to be. He drops his gaze to the ground and swallows, his lips pressing in a firm line, speechless for once since you’ve known him, “And, if you’re wondering, I guess for your satisfaction I’ll go ahead and admit, that no, I have not told anyone about this. For the sake of humiliation? Maybe. But I would think, or so I hoped, that you would be man enough to turn yourself in-”
“I-”
“No,” you hold up an index finger to stop his words, “I’m tired of bottling this up. And honestly, I think I know why you keep stealing the projects I originally planned on doing,” your eyes never leave his face, “You’re trying to get my attention for reasons I don’t understand. Is it guilt?”
“I-”
“Is it guilt,” he doesn’t answer, instead he slides his hands in his pockets, awkwardly avoiding your stance, “Well then,”
“I want to make it up to you,” the words are murmured, but you can’t ignore the genuine surprise you feel to witness them. Masking it, you still hold your ground.
“Then I guess you’ve got a long road ahead of you, bud.”
Turning on a heel, you sprint to the girls’ locker room, not realizing how severe the nausea in the pit of your stomach nearly wins. Hands are shaky from the adrenaline returning to normalcy, and you refuse to leave the room until the coast is clear. The journey to your car is when something between the windshield wipers catches your eye. White petals are swirled in the shape of a rose and hanging from the thorny stem is a small note with printed, bold letters; sliding your fingers to carefully retrieve the gift, your heart thumps through your temples, turning the tiny card to your line of vision, 'They say roses are red and that violets are blue, but rarities such as this, make me think of you.’
A small gasp escapes, your eyes wide as they continue to observe the beauty of the floret. It is rare for ones to desire a bundle of purely white roses, and you’ve always loved the aroma of their petals even when dried. But this message touches your heart in ways you can’t seem to gather, because whoever this is, envisions you as someone who stands out in a crowd of individuals like a diamond in the rough. Now, a brand new question sparks within your mind, is this the start of Taehyung’s apology? Because if so, he’s on the right track, and if he keeps going, he may even change your point of view.
“Gooood morning,” the skid of a plastic cup jingling with ice cubes is greeted before you- your palms that had been shading your tired eyes are moved out of the way to see your musing best friend.
“Is that what I think it is,”
“Your favorite iced coffee at your service,”
A gracious sigh sounds, “Oh my gosh, thank you so much, how did you know that’s what I’ve been craving all morning?”
“Because I noticed you were on Instagram at an ungodly hour considering we have an eight am class so, you’re welcome,”
“You are way too good to me, Guk,” you take a long sip- your muddled mind still hazy with the confusion from the night before. He proceeds to tease you about your evening endeavors but when a nervous pair of brown eyes belonging to Park Jimin enter the classroom, your heart weighs heavy- frame tensing when Taehyung follows behind him. You ended the friendship almost immediately and there are days you miss the trio with him and Jeongguk, but the betrayal is too overwhelming to just simply accept, and with the white rose that is nestled upon your bedside table in your room, you can’t help the frequent glimpses in Taehyung’s direction.
“Hey, are you present?” Guk’s voice snaps you from your reverie prompting you to jump a tad in your seat.
“I’m sorry,” you squeeze the bridge of your nose, “Something weird happened after the gym last night, so I’m still processing it I think,” and you don’t necessarily want to admit to Jeongguk that the reason you were up too late relates to the scrolling of Taehyung’s Instagram feed. Nor do you want to confess the secret you’ve been harboring about the truth of why you’re angry about Taehyung’s MUN presidency. Why you’re so scared of him not believing you is beyond you, but culpability is written all over your face for not listening to whatever your friend has been saying.
“You… wanna talk about it?”
Noticing Jimin lean over to let Taehyung whisper in his ear distracts you before the professor waltzes in to begin his lesson, “I’ll tell you later,” you promise, Jeongguk following your gaze in curiosity. Your next class isn’t until one o'clock, so the pair of you, at lunch, carpool to a nearby restaurant where you order your favorite dish- letting the taste melt on your tongue with each bite. As spoken, you spew the story of the white rose and how you’re uncertain of what to think.
“Do you know who it could possibly be?” Jeongguk’s fingertips twiddle with a straw wrapper, eyes flicker between you and his hand.
“I don’t know,” you tilt your head, wishing you could make sense of it, and you do not want to come off foolish for assuming Taehyung, but who else could it have been? And, how else would he know that you love white roses specifically? Unless… Jimin told him? Jimin most likely has known that fact about you that’s the only thing you decide, but who’s to say this will happen again? Shrugging it off your shoulders, for now, you reply, “I mean, do you think it would be… Jimin?”
Jeongguk pauses, the wrinkled wrapper dropping from his fingertips, “I’d say that’d be a good guess, but I still don’t understand what happened between you two,”
Gulping, you rest your forehead in your hand, “It’s a long story,”
“I have time,”
You take the tip of your fork and hit at a piece of stray food, nerves filling your tummy, “He just… lied about something he shouldn’t have, so that’s pretty much it,”
“[Y/N],” Guk’s soft voice stops you, leaning back in his chair comfortably- his half-eaten burger resting beside a small pile of fries. “You can trust me,”
“I know I can,” your grin reaches your sad eyes because you know with all your heart that you can; holding his gaze for a moment, there’s a longing you seem to miss behind them- the pink of his thin lips grows into a promising smile, yet you can’t bring yourself to tell him just yet. He’s protective as a best friend should be, and you know him finding out his best friend betrayed his other one would ruin his friendship with Jimin, and you just can’t risk that. “Jimin has been your best friend since the two of you were in diapers, I can’t- I just can’t ruin that… Okay?”
Disappointment appears in only a flash upon his expression but after a second, he nods, “Well, I hope the two of you figure something out. I miss us,”
“I miss us, too,” you whisper.
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Another week flies into another finding of a white rose, ribboned to your desk chair in the one class that none of your friends are in for them to pester you about it. You’ve arrived early enough to be able to react, shoving into your seat immediately, digging at what happens to be a small envelope until it finally opens. How is this happening? Never in your wildest dreams would you have ever thought of something so kind, especially when you read the bold letters of what is printed inside, 'Roses are red, but they can also be golden, just like your heart, I wish it was you I was holding.’
Each week a new discovery of a rose and a thoughtful poem is found, building into a dried bundle next to your bed- each note you keep taped into your journal where you read them every night with an endless smile; 'Roses are red or blue or yellow; and, ever since I saw you, there’s something I’ve always wanted to tell you’; 'Roses are orange even though it’s not seen, but I would love to make them known just as I would if it were you with me.’
Random run-ins with Taehyung have been brief, and frankly, awkward, yet you can’t help the leaping of your heart with each interaction. You’re still avoiding Jimin though he’s called recently, and Jeongguk hasn’t left your side through helping you finish up details of your MUN project, not to mention the fanatic phone calls about every rose still expressing how much you wish you knew who it was leaving such a magical trail behind. Everything continues in a blur until you reach the hallway one day when class is finished, everyone bustling by when your vision clears to see a defeated Taehyung speaking to an administrator of the MUN. But why would Taehyung be speaking to her unless… “What?” You murmur, especially when he catches your eyes that are now enlarged with surprise because, from the way he looks at you, you realize what he’s about to do.
You’re called into the administrator’s office that afternoon to officially be announced as the new president of the MUN- joyful tears falling from your eyes even learning the revelation that Taehyung will be on probation for his deception. Although he had done you wrong, the roses you feel he has left for you lead him to do this apology you’ve so desperately needed, prompting you to express to the administrator of giving Taehyung a second chance as far as letting him at least continue in the club. The administrator makes a pact to consider your words, and you jolt through the door, immediately searching for Jeongguk, calling him as you run through the campus- elation exuberating from your countenance.
“Can’t come to the phone right now, I have homework. Set me a bag of chicken nuggets at my door, and maybe I’ll consider procrastinating-”
“Jeongguk, you nerd!” You say breathlessly into the phone, “Where are you?”
“In my dorm. Did you just come from running?”
“No, Guk! I just came from MUN. I’m the President now! I am the fucking President of MUN!”
Crashing into his arms the minute you enter his dorm, he squeezes you so tight, your laughter reverberates within the room lighting up his world even though you don’t know it. “I just can’t believe it!” You beam, Jeongguk sways you from side to side. “When Taehyung said he wanted to make it up to me, I didn’t think he’d go that far,” you’re too shocked to decipher the events leading to now, Jeongguk glowing from how proud he is of your accomplishment- the accomplishments you always achieve- that he knows you will always achieve. “Like, with the roses, and the notes, who knew he could be so creative? So amazing. I would have never ever thought-”
Jeongguk’s eyebrows furrow a fraction of a second, “Wait a minute, what?” A weight that is as heavy as a million boulders crushes his chest in the biggest blow nobody could ever imagine. His arms are limp as he loosens his embrace, slowly backing away from you who is now staring at him in utter confusion.
“Guk, are you okay?”
He’s so hurt, he can’t even speak at first, stuttering his words before he looks at you with sheer pain in his eyes, “You… you think Taehyung left you those roses?”
“I-” Your forehead creases from how hard you’re trying to understand what’s going on that a minor headache throbs. Humiliation buds in the form of a deep blush heating across your chest, “I thought-”
“Taehyung doesn’t even know a thing about you!”
“I- I mean, I- figured Jimin told him, I-” Your voice is so soft that you’re not even sure you’re audible from how stunned you are.
“Jimin? You think Jimin knows a lot about you?” Jeongguk’s rigid frame remains a few feet away from you, the way he gets if something upsets him, and right now, you’re frantically searching your brain for whatever clue you must have missed, but you keep coming up short.
“Guk, I?”
“He doesn’t even know that white roses are your favorite! Or your love for your country and for people in general, and how you want to change the world for the better with all that you do now-” The profuse shatters tearing your heart to shreds sends massive waves of shock throughout your limbs when the reality of this situation becomes too much for you to discern because this whole time it wasn’t Taehyung. Nor Jimin, or a random guy (you’ve contemplated prior) that gifted you such genuine words. It was your best friend Jeon Jeongguk who is standing before you, naming any detail he’s learned about you since your friendship began a few years ago.
Silence hushes the atmosphere until the tap of a teardrop pangs your cheek, “It was- it was you?” Your voice is hardly above a whisper, and you’re horrified with yourself for not seeing the signs as clearly as you should have. All the emotions are hitting simultaneously that you feel it caving in, your heart racing- this whole time, the entirety of discovering the roses, your heart was truly beating for the individual who has been by your side ever since the day you came into his life.
Jeongguk’s eyes are red with pooling tears as he nods in reply, you’re so ashamed by your mistake that your vision blurs with even more tears, “I’m sorry, Jeongguk, I’m so-so sorry,” your voice breaks, bursting out the door to run. Hide anywhere that will shun you away from the devastation you feel in your chest. How could you have missed it? You want to scream to yourself. He was right in front of your eyes all along and you destroyed him. You think you hear him call your name, but you’re not sure, and when you make it to your room, you break out into a shuddering fit of sobs wishing for nothing more than to redo all of this.
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Two long weeks of countless tears and a heavy chest brings to a late night of studying, eyes rubbed to the point they sting when a call from your long lost friend, Jimin shocks you enough that you decide to answer. There has been no communication with anyone other than your parents, updating them on your schooling. You haven’t heard from Jeongguk in what feels like an eternity as what you feel you deserve, but you can’t suppress how much you have missed him. Missed hearing his voice or his presence beside you in class.
“Jimin?” You answer, burying your forehead in your palm for some stability.
“[Y/N],” he murmured, “I know you hate me right now, and I don’t blame you, but I really want to tell you how sorry I am for everything that happened-”
“Oh, Jimin, I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner, but I forgive you. Taehyung is a swooner from the whispers in the hallways, and I know bills have been tight,”
“Yeah, but what I did was wrong. I know you and Jeongguk would have never done that to me. I just feel like complete shit.”
You tense at the sound of Jeongguk’s name, in fact, you wonder if Jimin knows about what he’s been up to, “Well, you don’t have to anymore. The past is the past.”
There’s a pause as you wait for Jimin to continue, “You know, I ended up telling Jeongguk what happened-”
Your ears perk up faster than you press the snooze button every morning, rising slightly in your chair as nerves bundle throughout your body, “Say that again,”
“Uh, yeah, about a few weeks ago, I told him about what I did. I just couldn’t take it anymore. You two are my best friends, and I want what all three of us had back, you know?”
“Have you spoken to him recently?”
“… No, he’s still upset, but I know he confronted Taehyung. I’ve never seen Jeongguk so angry in my life,”
“He confronted Taehyung?” You feel light-headed while your words slur, almost like you’re in a dream.
“Yeah… you didn’t know that? That’s why Taehyung isn’t the president of MUN anymore, Jeongguk got him to confess-”
“Jimin!” You jump from your desk, knocking textbooks everywhere, padding along your bed for your sweater you threw there earlier, “I promise you everything will go back to normal. I forgive you, okay, but I’ve got to go-”
“[Y/N], are you alri-”
“I’ve gotta go Chimmy, I miss your boop nose mwah mwah mwah, gotta go, love you, bye!”
You’re on a mission, and nothing is going to stop you, not even the car that slammed on their breaks from where you jet across the parking lot. Your keys flail around despite the grip of your hand, and the trip to the grocery store makes you anxious from all the stoplights you’ve had to halt at. When the doors of the shop slide open, there’s a couple things you’re looking for, and when those items are found, you pen down the words that are on your heart before tying them to the other item you’ve purchased. Thoughts swarming in countless cycles, you blurt out whatever places you think he would be, and all you can come up with is the hope that he is in his dorm studying away for whatever classes he has tomorrow. And, if your intuition is correct, your next hope is that he will let you in so you can confess every word you have written all over your heart.
The run ascending the stairs sparks a close call of tripping, but you make it, tapping on his door swiftly before you hear the shuffling of footsteps behind it. The world seems more complete than it ever has when he opens the door- his doe eyes enlarge at the sight of you because when you left two weeks ago, he thought it was your decision to end things when really, it was your decision to begin things.
Jeongguk is the reason for your myriad of smiles since he entered your story, and for the stressful nights of schooling that turned into beautiful memories where he calmed you until you finished your homework; and even though your heart was broken by losing to Taehyung to find out it was a scam that included your other best friend- Jeongguk confronted the problem as soon as he found out, and because of Jeon Jeongguk, you are the president of MUN.
His lips are slightly ajar, scanning to see a white rose held within your hand gradually raising it closer to him. No words are exchanged when he reaches for the note hanging from the green stem; your gaze giving him permission to read what you’re finally confessing,
'Roses are red, although my favorite is white, I know that I will love you, for the rest of my life.’
An exhale of awe escapes past his lips from the pure joy surrounding his heart at the words he has been waiting to hear from you and only you.
“Guk,” you choke back the fresh tears brimming.
“[Y/N],” he breathes, cupping your face before he crashes his lips to yours, the world disappearing around you. Nothing matters anymore other than the man sweeping you away, not even hesitating to forgive you because his love for you is more than you can ever imagine. With his gift being curled within your sweater hemmed covered palm, you carefully grip his shoulders, him pulling you into his dorm whilst you kick the door closed behind you. He feels so warm, hovering above you while he parts his lips so gently, getting lost in this happiness the pair of you have always had with each other. You feel his smile within his kiss, making your head dizzy and mesmerized.
“Don’t stop,” you gasp breathlessly between kisses, the tip of his tongue gently meeting yours while his arms fully encompass you- the palm of his hand glides up your back ever so tenderly. Wherever you set the rose and wherever he set the note is beyond either of you due to the complete distraction of his lips. Your fingers tangle in his hair turning into a moment where your back greets the tattered futon in his living room. Warm fingertips sneak under your shirt, slipping under your bra to agonizingly graze your nipples building the feeling between your thighs even more.
Your teeth drag along his bottom lip as you release a moan enjoying the pleasure, he is giving you and when you tighten the entanglement of your legs and his, your heart pumps faster at the discovery of his hardened length. Craving to feel every inch of his skin, the pair of you take turns pulling off each article of clothing until the heat of his body presses to yours giving each of you a high you have always dreamed of.
He pulls away just enough to look into your eyes as if reading the depths of your soul, moving a hand to place a strand of hair behind your ear. There are no words needed to be said, the love is as real and as complete as you both feel it. Kissing you again, he then trails his palms along the side of your body until he finds your hips, carefully laying you down until he hovers over to touch a feather-like kiss to your heart.
You barely can react before his kisses pepper along your frame from your chest to your stomach, to your hips- the desire immensely growing when you feel his tepid breath panting above your heat. The tip of his index finger swipes quickly along your slit, his eyes darkening with lust when he sees how turned on you are for him. “Holy fuck,” he says before the smack of his lips parting introduces a long swipe of his tongue along your heat. “You taste so good.” Moaning in response, his fingers dig into your thighs, and his tongue licks even faster, his ears serenaded by your voice as your fingers grip at the cushion of the couch.
“Oh yes, oh yes, Guk- I- Ah!” Listening to your excitement, he circles the tip of his tongue over your heat multiple times before flicking it happily over your clit giving you all the satisfaction he can. To intensify the liking, he loosens his hold on your thighs and slides his fingers up your figure until he finds your nipples again- rubbing them repeatedly while he laps up your taste. “Guk, I need it. I need you now.” You plea, not wanting to climax so soon. Lifting, you are quivering from how powerful your desire for him is and shoving him to where he crashes onto his back, you climb to where his erection twitches in anticipation. You reach to hold his length, moving your drenched heat to linger at his tip for a tease. His gaze never leaves the sight as he sucks in a breath, and after a few seconds, you finally let him in, becoming one as you prepare to bounce up and down. He feels so incredible. Time disappears through the night until the pair of you reach the peak which sends you twisting into his frame to recover from the sensitivity you try to relieve by clenching your thighs. Giggling into the crook of his neck, you let his smile swoon you into happiness as it always has and always does.
Once silence seems to settle, you feel him shift to where he can face you. “You are everything I have ever wanted,” he whispers, pressing a loving kiss to the corner of your mouth. “I mean every word.” The emotions flood your chest, and you pull him even closer where your arms wrap behind his shoulders.
“I’m all yours,” you promise, “I will always be yours.” And, if forever is going to be as blissful as this, enveloped in the arms of Jeon Jeongguk,
then forever with him is all you will ever need.
254 notes · View notes
binxyu · 3 years
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Jungkook was meant to be just a guilty pleasure. Not your guilty pleasure, but a guilty pleasure. You knew never to fall in love with a man that thought loyalty was showing up on time. He was everything you never needed, but here you were. Your fingers pressed on the trigger that would start the flame of pain.
>>Pairing: Jeon Jungkook (dom) x fem!reader (sub) | fuckboy!jk x witch!reader
>>Word Count: 7.5k
>>Genre: Mini Series / Smut & Angst
>>Warnings/Kinks: Arguments, breast play, creampie, cum play, disloyalty, degrading, exhibitionism, fingering, hair pulling, marking, oral (receiving), praise, unprotected sex, and witchcraft
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Jungkook was too beautiful for his own good.
From his pouty lips and sharp jaw line to his starry eyes. The man was perfection.
Even you had fallen for him, a woman that stopped believing in love.
But, all you could do now was remember the times you had together as the fire slowly burns in front of you.
As your love for Jeon Jungkook disappeared into nothingness.
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Your fingers typed away at the keyboard, writing the second of three essays you had due. It was nearing the end of the semester and, while you were ecstatic at the mere thought of summer vacation, the stress of exams was looming over you.
“Can you look over this paragraph for me?”, you peeked up over your laptop and nodded, moving your own device out of the way to make room for Namjoon’s. Kim Namjoon was a journalist in the making, a man that knew exactly how to put events into words. He was quite different from you, but study sessions together were always eventful. You were the perfect person to correct his grammar mistakes or to help add detail to his work and he was the perfect person to help explain a certain historical detail you may have missed.
Studying religions was what you had decided was your interest considering your unique practice. You enjoyed learning about the beliefs of people centuries ago but the facts could get scrambled in your brain and that’s where Namjoon came in. He almost seemed to have a never ending timeline in his brain.
“I’d add more emphasize on Jungkook. He did beat the record after all”, you quickly realized when you read the paragraph that he was writing for the school paper again. Despite your attempts to persuade the man that he could do much better with his time, he continued to write for it.
“That’s true. Wait, how did you know about that?”, you let out an amicable chuckle. Of course Namjoon would assume you did not know. Just because you despised sports did not mean you were deaf. The whole school had been talking about the student since the track meet. While you couldn’t remember the exact record he beat, it was still a record.
“People talk”, you shrugged and Namjoon nodded. It was peaceful for a moment as you went back to typing, managing to push aside your emerging migraine. Your body was begging for a good nap, but you had to get this done. You were, among less appealing qualities, a hard worker. Perhaps it was due to the pressure put on you as a child or maybe it was because that diploma was just out of reach. Either way, nothing was going to get in the way of your future.
And, like the biggest fuck you from the universe, Jeon Jungkook walks in.
Yet, you hadn’t realized and kept typing until Namjoon cursed loudly, drawing you out of your world.
“Are you okay?”, your voice was soft before your eyes met the issue. Oh, poor clumsy Namjoon.
He had spilt his coffee all over his shirt, staining the freshly new white blouse he had worn. You couldn’t help but laugh as you dug in your bag for a napkin.
“Don’t bother, it’s too much for a napkin. I’ll go to the restroom. Be right back”, you gave him a brief nod and a thumbs up. Still, you got up with your little pack of napkins and tried to clean up the remaining coffee staining into the table. The librarian is sure to kill you both if it does end up staining the wood. Standing back to examine your work, you almost screamed.
Standing by your laptop was a tall figure with the most sinister smirk you’ve ever seen.
Jeon fucking Jungkook spilt your coffee all over your notes and laptop.
Your mouth hung open for a moment before fury overtook the shock. You stomped up to the broadly built man and yes you didn’t believe in violence as a solution but all you wanted to do was slap the smirk right off his gorgeous face.
“Why did you do that?”, you also wanted to yell but the librarian was already eyeing the table and you couldn’t draw attention to the mess.
“Because I like to watch you suffer, sourpuss”, how have you not killed the man in front of you? You had no idea. Because that name infuriated you.
You knew it was the student’s way of messing with you, wanting to strike that minuscule nerve inside of you. No one else believed you could get angry but Jungkook knew you could. Mostly because he had caused that anger.
“And why is that? Because Jimin told you another lie about me?”, Jeon Jungkook was so impossibly similar to Park Jimin that it was uncanny who he had learned his traits from. Truth be told, you had the smallest crush on the man in front of you during freshmen year. He was so affectionate, caring, and friendly back then.
But, instead of ending up with the sweet heartthrob, you had ended up with Jimin for that year and the next.
Starting out, he was simply a popular boy and loved you with his whole heart. But, time went by and his true colors shun through like the sunlight through your irritatingly useless blinds. He was a playboy. An awfully good one at that for you to have never noticed the extra pairs of undergarments that laid on his floor when you slept over at his dorm.
He cheated, but he blamed it all on you and even Jeon Jungkook hates your guts because you were sure Jimin had told him exactly what he had told most of your friends. That you had broken his heart with your “horrifying” witchcraft and that you were dangerous. It explained why so many students asked to see your devil shrine the next day or tried to barge into your dorm to look at what Jimin talked about.
The most ironic thing was that you had never used magick around the man and you barely used it to begin with. You supposed it was for good reason considering that happened the first time you told someone about it.
“Jimin doesn’t lie. He’s never lied to me and I’m sure you’re well aware of what you did”, his finger jabbed harshly above your breast, just slightly lower than your collarbone. Among many things, Jungkook was dense and forgetful. You noticed that quickly when you started spotted reminders written on his fingers or palm. Just like the little note saying “library 7pm” was written on the finger jabbing you.
Unless the track star had another reason to be in the library he never visited, he wrote that down just to catch you in time.
“Tell me, Jeon. What did I do?”, you tilted your head and moved away from him, realizing the coffee was now leaking onto the floor. You desperately wished Namjoon would hurry up and get back to help you.
“You broke his heart. Using magick or something”, you bit your lips in annoyance and turned around to face him.
“Or something? Jungkook, I never did anything to Jimin. I know you won’t believe it because you look up to him like some god, but he cheated on me. He broke my heart”, you jabbed back, hitting the same spot he hit you, “and, if you haven’t noticed, Jimin doesn’t seem heartbroken, does he?”. If he dared to say yes you may have to use that horrifying magick Jimin lied about because your ex was anything but heartbroken. He was with a new woman almost every night and, even with this knowledge, they lined up to be with him. Who could deny the charming Park Jimin?
Finally, Jungkook shook his head, his curly black hair bouncing as he did the movement. If he wasn’t such a nuisance, you might’ve wished you could run your fingers through it. It looked so fluffy.
“Then, leave me alone. It’s been years of your torment and I’m tired of it”, you sighed and slung your bag over your shoulder after shoving your slightly wet laptop into it, walking out of the library after sending a text to Namjoon that you had felt bad because no one really knew about your fights with Jungkook and Namjoon would surely try to beat his ass if he found out about it.
Leaving the coffee on the table was a bold move but a part of you hoped that the asshole would clean it up. It was his mess after all. Not your’s.
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“You’re coming to the track meet, right?”, the voice startled you and you sat up on your bed, making direct eye contact with Kim Taehyung. The only guy with a key to your dorm.
“Tae, I love you but you know I do not do sports”, you grumbled and flopped back onto your bed. Your classes had you beat and the need for a nap was too great to give up. Even if it was for your best friend.
“I know but it would mean so much if you were there”, don’t do it. Don’t do it.
You did it.
You made direct eye contact with those big puppy eyes Taehyung always used to get his way. You had fallen victim once again.
Which was why you had ended up in the cold, shivering as you watched the team run around the track for what felt like an eternity.
Taehyung had done great considering he barely moved before the season but who really stood out was Jungkook. His back muscles were only moments away from ripping through the flimsy shirt he was wearing and sweat was coating his hair. He was aware of how good he looked. He always was. He even was ballsy enough to wink at one of the girls screaming his name in the crowd.
Thankfully, the pleasant bliss that was drinking kept your mind off how irritated you were. You had snuck in a beer to drink (not that everyone else didn’t) and the alcohol loosened you up a bit.
After the meet was over, a sweaty Taehyung was clinging to you like a massive koala. He was high off adrenaline and couldn’t decide whether he wanted to cuddle or jump around.
“Tae, take this before you pass out on top of me”, you handed him a water and he gratefully took it, still leaning against you as he chugged down the drink.
Taehyung and you were polar opposites. He was an athlete, quite dorky, a great singer, and was overly optimistic. You, on the other hand, liked to keep to yourself, was not the best of singers, and always stuck to the reality of things. Even if you could manipulate that reality the tiniest bit.
“Let’s get you home”, you let the man lean his weight on you tiredly as you started to walk towards the exit of the field.
“Sourpuss, I need to talk to you”, that voice was definitely not the one you needed to hear when you were this tired and already agitated. What does a girl have to do to spend time in her bed?
“I’m a little busy if you haven’t realized”, you gestured to Taehyung, who was breathing directly on your neck and nuzzling his nose against the skin. It wasn’t an odd gesture considering your close friendship but his face was so cold it send goosebumps down your spine.
“I’ll help”, Jungkook offered, quickly coming to your rescue by crouching down and getting Tae on his back. The man grumbled but was happy to take the ride considering it was less soreness for his legs to endure the next day.
The Jeon Jungkook helping? What a trip.
“What do you want?”, you winced at how rude it sounded. Sure, Jungkook most definitely deserves said rudeness, but he was helping you.
“I’m sorry”, you legitimately thought you were hearing things and turned your head to look at him, stopping in your tracks.
“Can you say that again? I don’t think I heard you correctly”, the athlete groaned before turning to look at you, frustration evident on his face.
“I’m sorry. You were right about Jimin. He’s been talking shit behind my back for months and I had no idea”, if it wasn’t for your “told you so” attitude, you would’ve felt sorry for him. Jimin was one of his closest friends after all.
“Hate to say I told you so but”, he glared at you to shut up and you quickly did. His glare was so cold that a shiver went up your spine.
“Sorry, it was a joke. Jimin is really manipulative so don’t let him bring you down”, you reassured him, even bringing your hand up to pat his shoulder. By the way he flinched away, you would’ve assumed your hand was made of lava.
Noted. Jungkook hates being touched.
“I assumed so much about you and that was immature of me”, the man smiled softly at you. It felt like arrows pierced your heart. He had such a cute smile for an asshole. Like a bunny.
“It’s fine. Lots of people assume things about me”, you shrugged as you both started walking again, Taehyung looking down at you to make sure you’re okay. He was like your protective older brother and you couldn’t be more thankful to have him around.
“But they shouldn’t. So what if you follow a different religion? It doesn’t mean you’re evil”, that was probably the first time someone agreed with your practices besides Taehyung and Namjoon (mostly because he understood it better than others).
“Thank you for saying that. It means a lot”, you finally smiled back at him, sending his heart right into his chest as his heartbeat picked up. Needless to say, he adored your smile.
“I hate to ask this of you but could you tutor me on Epidemiology? I regret ever taking it and I’ll pay you”, you were wide-eyed with shock to say the least. You didn’t expect Jungkook to go out of his way to learn. Especially, not with you.
“Sure, you can join Namjoon and I in the morning”, you nodded before you saw the way Jungkook’s nose crinkled up in displeasure.
“What? What’s wrong with that?”, he sighed in response to the question as you both reached your dorm building. You’d just let Tae stay with you for the night.
“Namjoon hates my guts. We’re way too different. Besides, aren’t you two dating? I don’t want to be some third wheel”, Jungkook almost sounded disgusted at the idea, probably imagining you making out with Namjoon in front of him.
“I’m not dating him. He’s just the only other intelligent male I can tolerate”, he seemed to relax once you finished speaking but there was still tenseness evident in his shoulders which wasn’t due to the large man on his back.
“I still don’t get along with him despite the fact that he writes about me all the time. He once yelled at me for cheating and wrote an article about it”, that was a slap right to your face. Right, Jungkook was a player and he could throw your feelings aside like one of his cigarettes. Do not get attached.
“Well, don’t cheat”, you said because, let’s be real, it’s the truth. You unlocked the door and helped Taehyung off of his back.
“Bye Koo, thanks again”, your words were quick and you kicked the door closed with your shoe, your hands full thanks to the oversized man child clinging onto you.
Koo. He liked that.
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Weeks had ticked by and, somehow, Jungkook had managed to get your number. Honestly, Namjoon probably slipped it out or Taehyung gave it to him. According to Tae, the man had been oddly friendly to him and they were (borderline) friends now. They played video games together, practiced together, and even barged into your place for snacks together.
Great. Now you had two man-children to take care of and feed. It was definitely taking a chunk out of your paycheck each week to get extra snacks for the two. They ate like starving animals whenever they came over. A small part of you even thought it was just to piss you off even more.
Jungkook finally managed to get you to agree for a tutoring session with him. Just one. If this one went well then maybe you would agree to more.
The only sad thing about the session was that it was scheduled to happen right after your last class on Friday in your previous dorm. The dorm you had just finished cleaning up since the last time the two adult toddlers had destroyed it.
Surprisingly, when you had woken up one morning, Jungkook was still there. You assumed he and Tae were too drunk to get back to their own dorms and had decided to just sleepover at your’s. It was quite annoying if you were to be honest, but the way Koo looked actually interested in your religion was enticing.
He didn’t look scared or disgusted when he looked at your little collection of crystals on your desk or the jar resting on your end table sealed with candle wax. If anything, he actually looked amused or even impressed.
“I’ll pick you up after class. I can’t believe you don’t drive and walk to your dorm every day”, Jungkook shook his head as he walked beside you. Coincidentally, your last classes were next to each other but you were shocked to hear him offer to give you a ride.
“Don’t judge me, Mr. Playboy. I just have a fear of hitting someone. Have you seen the lunatics at this campus? They will run out into traffic for fun”, the man chuckled wholeheartedly at the pout on your lips. Plus, your joke was actually pretty accurate. Even he had almost hit a drunk idiot when trying to get back to his dorm late one night.
“Okay, that’s fair. So, you okay with me driving you?”, you nodded cautiously. While Jungkook was guaranteed to know every path to your dorm by now, you were still guarded. Being in that tight of a space with him was going to be difficult.
No, you don’t get those so-called “butterflies” when you were with him. Honestly, those butterflies were typically a bad sign to you. Feeling sick because you loved someone sounded a bit odd and almost contradictory.
You actually found yourself with more powerful emotions than anything. If Jungkook made you angry, you were angry. If he made you happy, you were happy.
Everything just felt so much stronger when you were around him. Thankfully, he almost always made you happy. He made you laugh because, once he discovered that beautiful sound, he couldn’t get enough.
So, after your class, you met him out in the hall and he walked you to his car. Now you realized how such an undetermined man got into college.
He was filthy rich.
Sitting there in the parking spot was a brand new Mercedes Benz. Its black color almost matched the distinct leather jacket that he decided to wear today. It very much screamed Jeon Jungkook.
However, it did not scream you whatsoever. You were almost afraid to get near it.
“Hop in. My grade isn’t getting any lower”, he opened the door for you and you weren’t sure if it was because you were friends, or whatever the fuck you two were, or if it was because he wanted a discount.
That’s not fucking happening. He’s already stolen plenty of money through snacks from your cabinets.
Meekly, you got into the vehicle, immediately buckling your seatbelt as if it was going to hurl itself into motion at any moment. Jungkook shut the door and went around to get into the drivers’ seat. Apparently he trusted his own driving so much that he never wore a seatbelt (Namjoon would’ve had a stroke if he was told that) and he drove with one hand (scratch that- make it two strokes).
Despite those things, he was an actual good driver. You felt safe and he drove the speed limit. Maybe it was just because you were in the car with him?
Getting out of the luxurious leather seats proved to be a hassle considering you knew your seats in your dorm were no where near as comfortable. You could sleep in that passenger seat without a care in the world compared to your own bed. Still, you forced yourself to get out and you two went up to your dorm. Jungkook is way too familiar with the place now considering he barely talks to you. It’s your place and, yet, he comes here for Tae.
“Alright, what unit do you need help on?”, you asked softly as you took the needed supplies out of your bag. You actually already took Epidemiology. It had nothing to do with your major but it was interesting to you. Who wouldn’t want to learn about the science of the world’s biggest killer: disease?
Jungkook simply looked at you, blinking a few times and pressing his tongue into his cheek in that nervous habit you realized he had.
“Oh- for fucks sake, Koo”, you grumbled as you realized how long of a process this was going to be.
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It had been months since you began tutoring the student and, finally, there was progress.
Standing proudly with his shoulders back was Jeon Jungkook holding a test with a big number ‘92’ on it in red ink. Your heart swelled with pride.
“I passed! This was the exam review test so I’ll pass the exam, right?”, you smiled brightly as you looked at his excited eyes. You never thought Jungkook would ever be excited over passing a class but you can’t judge people by their covers, right?
“Yeah! Just keep up with the studying and you got it”, you nodded quickly, looking away from his puppy eyes when you felt happiness engulf you like a fire.
Ironically, you were actually playing with fire. Your hand tugged on the trigger and a flame flickered from the end of your lighter. You brought it down and lit the candle in front of you. To be honest, you were a bit of a goodie two shoes but you did break one rule.
No fire in the dorms.
“Hey, I really wanted to thank you. I’m actually passing all my classes now and it fills like my life has purpose again”, woah, didn’t expect that.
“No problem, Koo. Your life always has purpose. What do you mean?”, you looked up from what you were doing, noticing he was leaning against the frame of your door.
“All I did was party and drink. Sure, I was a good athlete but that can only take you so far”, you nodded in understanding and stood up, walking towards him.
He followed your every move like prey waiting for the predator to attack them.
But, instead of an attack, he was met with a warm, genuine, and, all around, great hug.
“Do you think of me as everyone else does?”, you looked up at him, meeting his starry eyes.
Oh, you hated them because of how much you loved them. They held the galaxy within them and you could stare into them for hours if given the chance.
You were many things but, tragically for Jungkook, a liar wasn’t one of them.
“Honestly, I did before. I’ve seen you do some of the things the rumors talk about-“, smoking, cheating, fighting, “but now I know that’s not all you are. There’s more to you, Koo”.
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All Jungkook had been able to think about was your words. Sure, he didn’t care about your opinion before but it truly did make him happy to know you thought better of him.
“Jk! Where have you been?”, oh no.
“Jimin? I’ve just been at the gym a lot”, lies. He had been with you a lot.
“Ah, I see. How’s the bet going?”, the shorter man asked, running his fingers through his precisely cut hair. What a born model.
The bet. The bet you had no clue about. The bet Jungkook was too dense to refuse.
“It’s going. She hugged me yesterday”, Jimin scoffed and then chuckled, vastly different sounds that almost made Jungkook double over in fear. Truth be told, he despised Jimin. He despised him because he scared him. The only other man more influential than him was Jimin and that meant Jimin could ruin his reputation in a matter of seconds.
“That’s all? Damn, she really is void of love”, the bet Jimin was referring to was the one he made with the younger at the beginning of the year.
“I bet you can’t make her fall in love with you. She didn’t even love me, Koo! Me! I’m telling you, if you make her fall in love with you then I’ll get you anything you want”.
Time was running out with exams coming up and Jungkook needed to hurry if he was going to win such a bet. But, was it worth it if it meant disappointing you? Jimin may be scary but you made him feel so happy and so proud.
The only time he had seen you disappointed was when Taehyung broke one of your jars, resulting in a mess of coins, herbs, and wax on the floor. That’s the day he decided he never wanted to be on the receiving end of one of those looks.
“Yeah, she’s guarded which is understandable-“, wait- did Jeon Jungkook just grow some balls? “I’d be void of love too if everyone judged me for something I believed in”. He did.
“Where is that coming from? She deserves it, doesn’t she? Come on, JK. Keep that head in the game!”, Jimin patted his head like he was a child with all A’s on his report card, which, for once, was actually true thanks to you.
What game? You? Were you truly just a game to him?
“Alright, I’ve got this”, damn. Maybe you were.
Most nights you found yourself at the library now. It was the only place that was filled with peace and quiet. Especially on a Friday. Not even the librarian was here.
“Guess who”, hands covered your eyes and you would’ve punched the man behind you if you didn’t immediately recognize his husky voice. It was soothing with just the perfect mix of roughness. You couldn’t help but wonder what it sounded like when he just woke up.
“An asshole who thinks it’s okay to sneak up on women in a deserted place”, you grumbled and Jungkook immediately removed his hands.
“Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you”, oh here we go. Argument number two thousand.
“I wasn’t scared. I was just saying that, one, you’re an ass and, two, don’t do that to women”, he nodded in agreement and you thought that was the stopping of an argument. Boy, oh boy, were you wrong.
“I won’t anymore but you’re so weak. I’ve scared you so many times now”, you glared at him. Thanks to months of being by Jungkook’s side, you had become a bit more out of control. The feelings you used to keep caged up were now more out in the open. You cussed more often, even tried drinking (and almost spit it out on him), and your frustration was no longer hidden from the world.
“Jungkook, you are a menace to society and I would like it if you leaved”, it was a pointless threat. You didn’t really mean it. You adored his company but you wouldn’t admit that with a gun to your head.
“Liar, you love me”, shit. Did you? No, don’t ask that. It was just a joke.
Damn you and your overthinking.
“No, I hate you. Shut up”, that was also a useless threat. Jungkook never shut up. He was quite the talker and shutting up was not in his vocabulary.
“No, you hate me. Shut up”, he sat on the table you were previously working on, knowing this would take a while. Your arguments always lasted between thirty minutes to two or three hours. You both hated to back down.
“No, I love you. Shut the fuck up”, wait a second-
“As you wish”, he smirked victoriously and leaned closer, his face so close to your’s that you could smell his musky cologne.
“That was wrong”, you glared at him and he shook his head, “don’t open your mouth aga-“ you were cut off as his lips connected with your’s. He kissed you so intensely that your mind was fogged up, trying to figure out what the hell just happened.
Finally, with your brain still hooked on adrenaline, your hands found their way to his cheeks, cupping his well defined face as you kissed back. You could feel him smile into the kiss before he pulled away, leaving a spark traveling down your body. Now, that’s a good feeling.
“Ah, I love when you shut the fuck up”, you were so close to beating him with your bag.
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Everything was weird after the kiss. Life wasn’t some fairytale where you both lived happily ever after in some old palace somewhere.
No, you were both actually stuck in that “fuck, what are we?” mess.
Love wasn’t something you could control and that was why you never let it get that far, but, with Jungkook, it felt uncontrollable, spreading like wildfire.
So, you avoided him.
Of course, it wasn’t the most humane or easiest form of dealing with your feelings but it worked.
Well, for a little bit until Koo decided to block you off in the library, cornering you into the back section of the religious books. Oh, how ironic.
“What’s wrong?”, his voice made your knees want to give out. It was early and you assumed he woke up early just to catch you. His attire said that enough from his sweatpants to the tank top hugging his upper body. He obviously just threw something on before he left.
“What are you talking about?”, you tilted your head and tried to act innocent, but, once again, a liar you were not.
“Oh please, you’re obviously pissed off or scared of me or something”, bingo. You were horrified of what you were feeling and, in tune with it, Jungkook.
“I don’t know! Why do you even care? You’re obviously going to pass your exam so what am I needed for anymore?”, you winced at your own words, watching as the man’s usual bright expression turned into a sorrowful one.
“It’s much more than that, y/n”, that was probably one of the first times he had said your name. He usually called you nicknames like princess, sourpuss, or whatever else he came up with depending on his mood.
“Then what is it?”, the stare he gave you made you want to hide further into the corner. It was so predatory that your body was trying to fight its own instincts to run away and avoid the problem. You were always a flight over fight type of girl.
“You”, the one word made your eyebrows furrow, racking your brain for a response or understanding of what he meant. Jungkook shook his head as you watched your face twist in confusion.
“You’re so dense. Why would I kiss you if it wasn’t all for you?”, he leaned closer to you, hand resting on the shelf of the bookcase behind you. You silently thanked the universe that no one else was in there yet.
“Discount?”, it was the first thing you thought of and it caused a low chuckle to rumble out of Jungkook’s chest. He looked up into your eyes and it almost knocked the air out of you.
“Hmm, unless it’s a fuck buddy discount then I don’t think I want it”, he raised an eyebrow cockily and your eyes went wide. Little did Jungkook know that he just complicated your relationship even more.
“And what if I’m okay with making such a discount?”, the student practically groaned at the words, free hand finding its way on your hip, squeezing it. You don’t know where your new found confidence came from but you had gotten rather blunt since hanging out with Jungkook.
“Then I’d say you’re not the person I thought you were”, he hummed, leaning in to whisper in your ear. The way his breath tickled your ear sent sparks through your body.
“Is that what you want? For me to take you here against these books?”, yes you did. Looking around, you were met with many versions of Bible and other holy books of all religions. It was absolutely filthy and wrong to do it there which was why it was perfect.
“Yes, I want that”, your nails dug into the wood behind you, trying to ground your emotions down. It had always been an escape tactic to you.
“How naughty”, now you understood why he had chosen today of all days to corner you. He loved the skirt you were wearing and how easily it gave access to everything delicious underneath. Plus, your legs were perfect to him.
His fingers danced along your thighs before he pushed up your skirt, revealing the black lace panties underneath. Oh, you knew what was going to happen today and you definitely knew Jungkook liked his black.
“So pretty. Just for me?”, the question took you off guard, your own questions flooding your brain. Ultimately, after a few moments of silence, you decided he probably had a possession thing. Who didn’t like to feel powerful?
“Just for you, Koo. Fuck, touch me please”, so you decided to feed his little ego, edging him on until he pulled the panties to the side to reveal your glistening pussy.
The dim light of the library truly didn’t do it justice but he couldn’t help himself from finding it to be also perfect. He was in deep shit now.
His long fingers ran down your slit until they reached their destination: your pussy. He rubbed around it before he slowly plunged his middle finger into the wetness, curling against your walls.
Fuck, you always hated that finger but with it inside of you? Maybe you could make an exception.
Your body shook in response to the stimulation since you hadn’t been touched in so long, your hands gripping the wood tighter to keep yourself steady. Jungkook smirked when you clenched around his finger before he added another, stretching you out wonderfully as he scissored you open.
And that was when Jungkook found his favorite sound in the world.
“Jungkook! Oh god”, you moaning his name sounded like music to his ears and he couldn’t get enough. The only thing he hated was how quiet it was since you were still conscious of the library around you. He wanted you to scream it.
“You like that, princess? You want more?”, you obediently nodded, not in the mood to be denied an orgasm (which you were sure Jungkook would do if you didn’t obey). The man chuckled and leaned down, still pumping his fingers steadily as if it took no effort at all. If you had done this yourself then your fingers would have been cramping by now.
Your body jolted when Jungkook’s plump lips wrapped around your clit, sucking harshly on the nerve as if he was starving. To be fair, he had skipped breakfast.
You feared for the books behind you as your body spasmed, orgasming on the man’s fingers. You took deep breaths once you were finished and watched as Jungkook pulled away, pulling his cum covered fingers out of you.
With prolonged eye contact, he slipped the digits into his mouth and sucked the juices off of them. A new wave of arousal went through you when he tapped your lips with them, making you open your mouth. You gagged briefly when they hit the back of your throat but you sucked on it, licking your way up his middle finger.
“Good girl”, now that was going to haunt you forever. You whined when he pulled his fingers away and he smiled teasingly at you.
“I’m going to need to see these”, your eyes went wide when he gripped the collar of your shirt and ripped it clean down the middle, tossing it aside as if it didn’t cost you a fortune.
“Jeon Jungkook! That was expensive”, you huffed but he paid you no mind, just reaching behind you to remove your bra too so it can join the rest of your clothes.
“What if someone sees? I can’t cover these up quickly, Koo”, you crossed your arms over your chest, looking around cautiously. Jungkook just laughed and pulled your arms away, pinning your wrists above your head so he can press his body against your own.
“Take my shirt off and you can put that over you for the day. It’s fine, sourpuss”, oh you would’ve slapped him if you weren’t so turned on. He let go of your wrists and you quickly removed his shirt for him, revealing a muscular chest you could’ve never imagined.
And he never imagined how beautiful you’d look with your hard nipples pressed against the thin fabric of his white t-shirt. He grabbed them immediately and you failed to see the spark in his eyes as he squished them together.
“That was one of my favorite shirts. What a di-“, you yelped when he pulled your leg up over his shoulder, yanked his pants and boxers down, and pulled your panties aside to rub his angry tip against your folds. Your head rested back as he rubbed against your clit, covering his cock in your juices.
“What a dick indeed”, Jungkook chuckled deeply, arousal blurring his world into nothing but you. The only thing that mattered at that moment was feeling you.
His lips attached to your neck and you were so out of reality that you didn’t realize he was littering the skin with his marks, a silent claim on you as he pushed himself inside of you.
“Oh shit, it’s exactly as I imagined. So tight and warm”, and he was just as you imagined. So very big. You didn’t think anyone else could stretch you out as much as Jeon Jungkook and that thought made you groan.
“You’ve been imagining it?”, it was your turn to smirk and, for the first time ever, the man in front of you blushed.
“Oh please princess. I know you’ve been thinking about it too”, and you had been. Not that you’d ever admit that after he just basically friends with benefits zoned you.
“Just move you asshole”, Jungkook gripped your hair, tugging on the soft strands as he finally kept pushing, bottoming out inside of you perfectly.
His big hands moved to grip your hips, a little help to keep you up as he started to snap his own into your’s. He was mildly uncomfortable at first but, as you adjusted to his size, bliss filled your body.
Finally, you were doing something to make yourself happy and pleased. Maybe Jeon Jungkook wasn’t the best man to do it but he was making you feel so so good.
The man snapped you out of your thoughts as he brought your hand down to your clit. You understood and started to rub it, happy knowing that Jungkook was also looking out for your own pleasure too. Not that you’d know he had been thinking about you creaming on his big cock for months now.
“Keep doing that”, he whispered despite the heavy groan that threatened to come out. He was referring to the uncontrollable clenching you were doing around his dick, sucking him into your walls with each muscle movement. You listened and (despite knowing you were going to keep doing it anyways) clenched once again.
“Can I cum inside?”, you whimpered at the idea of Jungkook’s cum filling you up and, knowing you’re on grade A birth control, you nodded. While Jungkook was effortlessly attractive, kids were not part of your plans by far.
“You close too, princess?”, you nodded, a small moan spilling past your lips despite your best efforts to be quiet. With that knowledge, the man orgasmed and you could feel his seed start to coat your insides. The feeling made you tumble over into your own orgasm, coating his softening cock with your release.
“I think that’s the best sex I’ll ever have”, you praised him as you tried to put your cramping leg down off his shoulder. Instead, he held it tighter and pulled himself out of you. He watched as his cum started the spill out of you, dripping down your thighs beautifully.
So, he’s a man who likes to admire his work.
You almost screamed when he pushed it back inside of you with his finger due to the sensitivity.
“See you later, sourpuss”, Jungkook smirked and put your panties back to their original position before he pulled his own boxers and pants back up. He walked off and you were left gobsmacked with his cum dripping out of you onto your panties.
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As the weeks passed by, the world became more vibrant and cheerful but also more chilling and worrisome.
Exams were over and you were free to go wherever you pleased but, somehow, you always found yourself wanting to be with what was supposed to be your secret guilty pleasure. Now, he was your everything. He truly brought color into your world; sadly, color always comes with black and white.
“I won the bet, Jimin. I want what I asked for”, you listened intently from the other aisle of books. The library had become your go to spot to find Jungkook. Surprisingly, the once unmotivated student was more frequently in here because of the sheer relief he got when you stood before him with a proud smile. What a softy.
“Really? She fell for you? Damn, you still got it. I can’t believe you asked for this though”, the disgust in your ex’s voice was evident and you so desperately wanted to see what he was referring to. You truly thought Koo had stopped being friends with Jimin after he apologized but apparently you were wrong about a lot of things. Most of all, you were wrong to love again.
Feeling your tears start to spill down your cheeks for the first time in years, you forced yourself out of the library. You should’ve seen it coming. What would a playboy want with you? A woman looking for a serious relationship? You’re an idiot and you’ll fix it.
Said playboy must’ve spotted you because you could hear his heavy footsteps behind you as you rushed out of the library, hurrying into a run with the safety of your dorm in mind. It was time to end this.
So, here you were. Remembering everything from the past few months as the candles in front of you burned, getting so desperately close to the string connecting them. You had carved an evident ‘JK’ on one and your initials on the other, bonding them to the people who needed to be apart from one another.
Watching his candle, you noticed the wax dripping down the long wick and you knew they were tears. You knew because of the loud banging coming from your dorm door, the man on the other side screaming and sobbing for you to let him explain.
Your candle, however, burned strongly with vengeance. It stood so tall compared to Jungkook’s and, as the fire finally burned through the string tying you both together, you felt free. It was like Jeon Jungkook had never affected you before and his name slowly slipped from your mind.
Eventually, the banging stopped as the candles reached their ends and the fire flickered out under your gaze. You felt so blissfully numb as you walked towards the door, opening it to reveal a confused Jungkook looking up at you.
“What did you do? It’s like-“, you cut him off with your hand, pulling him up rather roughly.
“You never knew me. That’s how I want it, Jeon Jungkook. You never knew me and I never knew you. Now, get your prize and leave me alone”, you slammed the door in his face. You felt pure relief but Jungkook could still feel a pang of want in his body.
You had failed to notice the little wax left of his candle that stood strong as you dumped it in the trash and he failed to notice that he had left his “prize” outside your door as he rushed off.
A gorgeous rose quartz necklace.
What a way to declare your love to a witch who just cut it all off.
453 notes · View notes
wardenannie · 3 years
Text
Just friends
In the beginning they aren’t friends at all. Not even remotely. 
Hange is too excitable for Levi, and Levin too severe for Hange. Though the scientist attempts to feign cordiality between the two of them, Levi does nothing to conceal his disdain. It is only after Erwin calls them into his office and speaks to them sternly that they finally come to a silent agreement with one another. 
Just friends begins with a sort of truce. An understanding between them that perhaps they aren't so different, or they are, but they can learn to overcome those differences for the sake of synergy in the field.
That is what Erwin wants, after all. 
They still poke fun, but it's more lighthearted than it was before. More playful. There is a gentleness to it, a light. It brings some levity to those brutal, bloody days that linger in the backs of their minds. They actually begin to take some small comfort in each other’s presence, though neither of them are willing to admit it allowed, and most certainly not to each other. 
When just friends becomes staying up and drinking tea and whisky into the budding hours of dawn, neither of them can say. But more than once they are the only two left standing among a field of drunken allies.
They look at one another, and even Levi, dead sober, sipping his tea, cannot help but smirk.
When Hange passes out in his lap he reluctantly allows the contact, that is until they drool on him, at which point he surreptitiously slips a pillow beneath their cheek. 
He pretends not to watch them sleep, only for a moment.  
He doesn’t find their peaceful expression enchanting. He doesn’t secretly find them handsome with their russet hair covering their eyes, mingling with their lashes. He pushes it out of their face anyways. 
They’re just friends.
Just friends becomes casual touches. Passing smiles (or affectionate scowls in Levi’s case). It becomes easy nights spent in silent company. Nights spent in Hange’s lab, or lounging in the library. It becomes silent understanding, a fleeting consciousness of what the other is about to say or do. 
Just friends becomes a sort of casual, platonic intimacy that has their comrades whispering and casting them knowing glances. But they simply ignore it. They are just friends after all. 
When just friends begins to entail tending one another's wounds is about two years after their first meeting. Hange limps to his quarters, calf a bloody tattered mess from a nasty three-meter bite.
"I can't go to the infirmary," they explain. “If Erwin finds out about this he’ll bench me.” 
He scolds them as he treats the wound with iodine and wraps it in clean gauze. 
“You need to be more careful, four-eyes. It could have taken your leg clean off,” he tries to disguise the way his hands shake as he cleans each of the shallow gouges which hug Hange’s calf in a gory half moon. 
They hiss and wince as dirt and debris are washed away, leaving only ragged flesh which will surely scar. 
Levi pretends that their obvious discomfort doesn’t perturb him, but it does. Another new development. He cares for them, loathe as he is to admit it. 
Just friends becomes sharing a bed with surprising swiftness after that. 
It is after a particularly gory expedition beyond Wall Maria. Many of their comrades fall, never to rise again. The blood runs in rivers over the fallow earth, bones crunch between massive, inhuman teeth. And the screams. The screams bite into both of them; leaching into their very cores and clinging there like poison; breeding doubt, fear. 
The knock comes on Levi’s door well past midnight. That he is still awake is a coincidence he cares not to consider too closely.  
He knows its Hange without asking. Who else would be so bold as to disturb Captain Ackerman’s beauty sleep? 
“Come in?” He’s reading a book by candlelight and doesn’t so much as glance up as Hange Zoe enters the room, shutting the door carefully behind themself. 
“Levi...” 
He glances over the top of his book; stare cool but not unkind, “Why are you bothering me so late at night, shitty-glasses? You should be asleep.” 
Hange lingers at the threshold, clad in loose sleep clothing. Levi pretends he can’t see their nipples poking through the gauzy fabric of their shirt, “I could say the same about you.” 
A long, pained silence passes between the two of them. A quiet sort of understanding. 
Slowly, Levi lowers his book into his lap. Then he peels back the covers, scooting over and making room for Hange beside him. 
“Bad dreams?” He asks, already knowing the answer he will receive.
Hange crosses the room and sits on the edge of the bed, they rest their elbows on their knees, steepling their fingers in front of their face, “Yeah. You?”
Levi swallows thickly and nods. 
“Can I...” Hange turns their face away, glancing out the window in a paltry attempt to disguise their flush, “Can I stay here tonight?” 
Levi doesn’t so much as hesitate, “Yes.” 
Tentatively, Hange lowers themself into the mattress, stealing away one of Levi’s pillows. They don’t touch. They don’t speak a word once Hange has settled in beside Levi. The captain simply reaches over his comrade and snuffs out the candle, cloaking them in darkness. 
And so just friends becomes best friends in a night. 
The territory of best friends is accompanied by a new found respect for one another. A respect that runs deeper than that which had already existed between them. Occasionally Levi will glance up at Hange to find that their eyes are already on him. Usually they are smiling. But on rare occasions their expression is more contemplative; thoughtful and distant. 
Levi tries not to think about it too deeply. What it could mean. What they could be thinking while they stare at him with such intensity. 
Then the meaning of just friends who happen to be best friends shifts again during a hard fought battle beyond the suffocating succor of the Walls. 
Levi jerks awake, head throbbing, mouth dry and tasting of blood. The world around him is blurry at first, and he struggles to recall where he is until it slowly comes into focus. 
There are arms around him, supporting his aching head and clutching at his hand. A voice calls out to him, low and panicked. 
“Levi? Oh thank fuck, Levi,” it’s Hange. Levi can’t quite remember where he is, but he could place Hange’s voice anywhere. Slowly, they come into focus over him. Their head is ringed with sunlight that shines from behind them, creating the illusion of a halo around them as they look down on him. 
It strikes him how perfect they are. Gorgeous. Handsome. Hawkish nose and wide, bright eyes, olive skin and russet hair. Imperfectly perfect. 
Their wine-colored eyes shine with worry. They touch his face, tenderly, “Can you speak?” 
“Yeah,” Levi rasps, and it finally comes back to him. A titan had emerged as if from nowhere and swept him out of the sky, knocking him head first into the cold, hard ground. Hange saved his life, felling the thing at the last moment before it took the Captain into its jaws. 
For a moment it is enough to stun him. But isn’t that what best friends do for one another? 
It is that night in Levi’s tent that they go from being just friends who are also best friends, to best friends who kiss in the dark. 
Hange refuses to be parted from him. Insisting that he needs supervision due to his possible concussion. Levi doesn’t argue as they help him to his sleeping bag. Outside the stars hold their silent, glittering vigil, and the moon hangs low and radiant in the sky, bleeding through the canvas of the tent just enough to allow for some visibility. 
“Try to stay awake,” Hange says softly, sitting beside him. They touch his forehead, pushing his hair away from his eyes. Their touch lingers, and Levi cannot help but notice the way their eyes seem to glimmer in the dark. 
When they lean forward and press their lips to his it is chaste, delicate and fleeting. But when they try to pull away he cups the back of their neck and tugs them back to him, sitting up slightly so he can kiss them from an improved angle. 
“Just friends,” he rasps between hurried kisses. Hange occupies all of his senses, from their earthy scent to the sharp taste of them on his tongue. He loves it. He would gladly drown himself in Hange Zoe. 
Hange nods, curling into his side, kissing him again, “Just friends blowing off steam.” 
Just friends, best friends, best friends who kiss in the dark; they carry on that way for months. Stealing kisses in those quiet moments between meetings and missions. 
It isn’t long before hands begin to roam. Curious fingers searching over one another’s bodies as they chase each other’s tongues over eager, sliding lips. But they hold back. They resist that primordial drive for sex with everything they have. Because how can they be just friends if they’re having sex? How could they cross that line without jeopardizing everything they have built with one another? 
But the others know. Mike, Nanaba, Moblit, even Erwin... they all know. The teasing glances have turned to those of legitimate concern, the passing comments have turned into genuine appeals for common sense. And so they are met with the second reason to remain just friends, best friends, friends who kiss in the dark; the life of a soldier is not one which can accommodate love. Real unconditional love. Duty will always take precedent. 
Then comes the night where kissing in the dark is not longer enough. 
It was never really enough, but things finally reach a boiling point. 
Hange is in their lab, working well past midnight when Levi stumbles in. He is clad in nothing but a pair of loose fitting sleep pants, slate eyes wild. He is flushed, covered in a thin sheen of sweat. 
A nightmare. He’s had a nightmare. Hange bleeding in his arms. Dying. Not from a wound inflicted by a titan but from a series of bullet holes bored into their middle. Weeping blood, crimson welling over his fingers despite the pressure he applied. 
The image clings to the backs of his eyes, boring its way into his soul, his heart, his mind and consciousness. Hange; killed by another human, not a titan, but a man. Suddenly nowhere feels safe or sacred. He wants to take Hange into his arms and flee. Flee until the world cannot catch them. 
Kisses in the dark could never fix this. It feels like nothing could fix this. 
“Levi?” Hange turns away from their work, a collection of bubbling beakers resting on the wooden countertop. Their expression is one of concern as he crosses the room and pulls them roughly into his arms. 
“I can’t fucking do this anymore,” He snarls, and then he kisses them roughly, pushing the small of their back into the hard edge of the counter. The beakers rattle and several spill over with the force of his body against theirs. 
Hange moans into his mouth, melting into him, arms winding around the back of his neck as he helps them up and onto the counter. They shift backward, experiment forgotten, and suddenly they are anything but just friends. 
Levi buries himself in Hange with little foreplay or preamble, but they are already wet and pliant, ready for him. 
The sex is fast and desperate. Hange buries their face against Levi’s neck, feeling the erratic pace of his pulse as he delves into them. 
“I love you,” they whimper. Because they do. With everything they have they love their Captain. Levi Ackerman. Humanity’s strongest. Theirs.
Levi fucks them harder for it. Because it can’t be. They’re just friends. Best friends. Friends who kiss in the dark and make frantic love at the thought of losing one another. Just friends.
Just friends. 
Just friends. 
Levi comes inside of Hange with a broken sob. Their fingers are in his hair, lips on his as they follow him over the edge. They’re crying, too. Tears mingle between their mouths as they work one another up again. 
They dress, but only long enough to reach Levi’s quarters, at which point they peel away their clothing and fall into bed together. All of it is wordless, silent knowing passes between them. Each anticipates the other’s movements and react with according passion. 
They make love again. Slower, softer. Hange’s soft cries fill up the room, punctuated by Levi’s muffled grunts as he buries his own noises in their damp skin. 
“This is perfect,” Hange whispers, nails raking down Levi’s switching back. And then they say it again, “I love you.” 
Wetness floods between them as Hange comes first. Levi rocks them through it, body wracked with pleasure, mind wracked with confusion, fear of what will happen come sunrise, when this new, precious thing between them has been exposed to the light of day. 
But is it really so new? Has he not always loved Hange Zoe? Have they not occupied his every waking thought for years as he refused to acknowledge his own attractions?
He looks down as he fucks into them, finds their wine-colored gaze is locked on his face. They reach up and cup his cheek, soft moans slipping past their lips as his hips stutter and he finishes inside of them for the second time that night. 
“Hange,” The way he speaks their name is ragged, like a desperate prayer on his lips. He kisses them. He never wants to stop kissing them. 
“I love you,” Hange breathes between kisses. They roll onto their sides, their faces illuminated by a shaft of silvery moonlight through the window. “You don’t have to say it back but I can’t be just friends anymore, Levi. It’s driving me crazy.” 
They kiss him, “Seeing you.”
Again, “Touching you.” 
A third time, slower, wet, lingering, “But not being with you.” 
Levi’s hands are on their hips, caressing up their sides. He feels the goosebumps he leaves in his wake, and knows he shares a similar physiological reaction to Hange’s own touch. 
But they’re just friends. Just friends, best friends, friends who kiss in the dark, friends who make desperate love and whisper heartfelt confessions under cover of night. Just friends. 
Hange touches his cheek, “Say something, please, Levi.” 
His lips part, but he struggles to find the words to express his emotions. Nothing makes sense in that moment. The world has tilted on its axis, everything is changed, and yet nothing is. 
“We were never just friends, shitty-glasses,” he says, finally. His eyes are glassy, gaze turned up to peer out the window at the night sky. The stars show their brilliant faces, glittering, and Levi wonders if perhaps their fate is written somewhere in that serene darkness. 
“We’ll keep it a secret for as long as we can,” Hange reassures him, settling there head against his chest, where they can hear his heart beating steady and strong. They run their fingers over his sternum, between his pecs and down the expanse of his abdomen, toying with the trail of downy hairs beneath his navel. 
“They already know,” Levi sighed, and he presses his mouth to the crown of Hange’s head. His eyes flutter shut, savoring the earthy sent of his lover. “It doesn’t matter anymore.”
You’re all that matters, he tacitly implies. 
“They know that we were never just friends.” He pulls the sheets over their sweat damp bodies. Cum stains the fitted sheet. 
“They don’t approve,” Hange says softly, half asleep, lulled by Levi’s steady breaths.
“I don’t give a shit what they think. We deserve this.” Happiness. Even if it was fleeting. Even if one of them died come dawn, it would have all been worth it; to have been loved, to have known love. 
They drift to sleep in each other’s arms. 
Just friends, who became best friends, which in turn because friends who kiss in the dark, then lovers. Two people in love.
But they are soldiers, and they both know that whatever time they might have is borrowed. So they treasure it as best they can. 
141 notes · View notes
seokiie · 4 years
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𝙸𝚜 𝚃𝚑𝚒𝚜 𝙰𝚕𝚕𝚘𝚠𝚎𝚍? 𝙸𝙸
+ 𝘚𝘶𝘮𝘮𝘢𝘳𝘺: 𝘈𝘧𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘧𝘪𝘳𝘴𝘵 𝘮𝘦𝘦𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘛𝘢𝘦𝘩𝘺𝘶𝘯𝘨, 𝘺𝘰𝘶'𝘳𝘦 𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘳𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘰 𝘭𝘰𝘴𝘦 𝘩𝘰𝘱𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘩𝘦'𝘭𝘭 𝘩𝘰𝘭𝘥 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘮𝘪𝘴𝘦 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘢 𝘴𝘦𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘥 𝘳𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘥. 𝘖𝘧 𝘤𝘰𝘶𝘳𝘴𝘦, 𝘧𝘢𝘵𝘦 𝘩𝘢𝘴 𝘢 𝘧𝘶𝘯𝘯𝘺 𝘸𝘢𝘺 𝘰𝘧 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨.
+𝘞𝘰𝘳𝘥 𝘤𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘵: 4.1𝘬
+ 𝘗𝘢𝘪𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘨: 𝘛𝘢𝘦𝘩𝘺𝘶𝘯𝘨/𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘥𝘦𝘳
+ 𝘞𝘢𝘳𝘯𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘴: 𝘴𝘦𝘮𝘪-𝘱𝘶𝘣𝘭𝘪𝘤 𝘴𝘦𝘹, 𝘛𝘢𝘦𝘩𝘺𝘶𝘯𝘨 𝘩𝘢𝘴 𝘢𝘯 𝘰𝘱𝘱𝘢 𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘬, 𝘤𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘮𝘱𝘪𝘦, 𝘤𝘢𝘳 𝘴𝘦𝘹, 𝘤𝘶𝘯𝘯𝘪𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘶𝘴, 𝘮𝘶𝘭𝘵𝘪𝘱𝘭𝘦 𝘰𝘳𝘨𝘢𝘴𝘮𝘴, 𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘶𝘭𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯, 𝘛𝘢𝘦𝘩𝘺𝘶𝘯𝘨 𝘪𝘴𝘯'𝘵 𝘧𝘭𝘶𝘦𝘯𝘵 𝘪𝘯 𝘌𝘯𝘨𝘭𝘪𝘴𝘩, (𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘺 𝘪𝘮𝘱𝘰𝘳𝘵𝘢𝘯𝘵 !! 𝘛𝘢𝘦'𝘴 𝘩𝘶𝘨𝘦 𝘤𝘰𝘤𝘬 !!)
On AO3 || part one
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~
"Are you working a double today?" Your friend says with her jacket in hand and bag around her shoulder.
"No. No, I think I'm gonna head back to my dorm today." You sigh from behind the counter, untying your apron and folding it in your hands.
You felt kind of dumb. For the past month and a half you've been staying late at work, working doubles just in case a certain someone decided to show up. Just your luck, he never did. It was almost taunting, working extra hours almost every day just to go home alone. He never texted you and, well, to be fair you never texted him either. You felt like you had a pass, though, because you didn't know when he'd be back in America. What was the point of texting first if you didn't know that one crucial fact?
While the extra money was nice, you couldn't afford to work late anymore. Midterms were just around the corner and you really needed to get back to your dorm and study.
As you're gathering your things to leave and locking up, the whole situation seems to hit you. You and Taehyung are from completely different worlds. Taehyung's apart of a worldwide Korean pop group and you're a broke college student who works part-time at an urban cafe. You mentally facepalm at the fact that you thought Taehyung would ever come back to you. He probably has so many options in Korea, not even. He has options all over the world, for god's sake.
You're letting out another groan of self-pity when you're phone chimes with a new text. Almost a little too eagerly, you unlock your phone and-
It's a text from your roommate.
You coming back tonight or are u working late??
You let out another groan. You're roommate only asked that if she was planning on bringing a guy back to the dorm, which wasn't allowed but you're no snitch.
"Lucky me, looks like I'm spending the night at the library." You roll your eyes at no one but yourself, turning off the main light and stepping out of the cafe. The air outside is a lot colder compared to this morning. You kind of regret not bringing a jacket as goosebumps start to rise on your bare arms and thighs. On top of that, you have to walk all the way to the library. It really was your lucky day, huh. You close the front doors, locking them then shoving the keys into your bag.
It wasn't too late, it was maybe seven or eight o'clock yet it was still cloudy and sullen. Walking somewhere as far as the campus library while it was this dark didn't sit right with you but you didn't have anywhere else to go or any other way to get there. Ah, at least the library had heaters and those comfy beanbag chairs-
"Hey." Just as you're starting to comfort yourself with the promise of a gigantic physics textbook, long fingers are wrapping around your arm and gripping you with a force that has you stumbling backward. Are you being kidnapped? You always saw posts about watching out for sex traffickers but you never thought it'd happen to you. You're too young, you have a future!
"Who-who are you?! Don't kill-" You're practically begging for your life, nearly screaming in hopes that someone walking by will see something wrong until... until you actually look up and meet the eyes of this ominous stranger.
"T-Taehyung?" You finally stop your struggle when you notice the black mask, black hoodie, and blond curls. Did he get taller compared to the last time you saw him?
"Hi."
Is that all he had to say? He kind of just stands there with his fingers still wrapped around your arm. His eyes are squinty and you can tell he's smiling despite the mask. He was clearly happy to see you but you weren't one hundred percent sure you felt the same way.
"Hi? Seriously?" You raise an eyebrow and scoff, trying to pull your arm out of his hold a second time but his grip is still too tight. You can see the moment his smile falters and you'd feel guilty if it weren't for his nails digging into your arm right now. Seriously, does he have any idea how strong he is?
"You not happy to see me?" You can hear the pout in his voice and his hold on you finally loosens. You let your arm fall to your side and you rub the area with your other hand, trying to make some of the pain go away.
"I- I'm- you can't-" You sputter. Okay, you were happy to see him, you have to admit, but that doesn't mean you weren't a little frustrated with him.
"Aw, just as shy as I remember." Taehyung's eyes get squinty again and he brings his hand up to pat the top of your head. You don't know whether to feel embarrassed or exhilarated at the gesture.
"Wanted to see you for while. Did you... miss me?" You watch the way Taehyung's eyes trail down your body and you feel your skin heat up at the simple action. Despite half his face being hidden, you could practically taste the lust in his eyes.
"I... It doesn't matter if I missed you. I didn't think you'd ever come back..." You cross your arms and turn away. You don't want him to notice how flustered he'd made you with just a couple of words.
"Why would you think that? You think the coffee shop was it? You think I don't want more?" Taehyung brings his hand up to your face and rubs his thumb over your cheek gently. It seemed like a comforting gesture but you could tell there was much more to it.
"As I was on the plane, my mind... it went to you. I don't know why. All I can think is how good you'll taste..." Taehyung's eyes visibly darken as his hand moves down your body from your cheek to your waist, his fingers pressing against your back slightly as he pulls you closer.
"Fuck, I could barely wait. You'll let me have you, right? You'll let me fuck you properly this time?" He suddenly tugs you forward and to avoid tripping into him, you place both of your hands on the plain of his chest, hard and muscular and fuck. He must've done that on purpose. You could sense his smirk through his mask.
"Wait... Shit, Taehyung, someone's gonna- someone's gonna see us." Your hold on Taehyung's shirt tightens when you feel big hands drifting slowly from your waist to your ass. Honestly, you really did miss him, you missed having his hands on you like this, and now that he's finally touching you your frustration is starting to melt away.
"Let's go somewhere." It's only been a month or so and his English had improved so much from when you last saw him. He seemed to speak more naturally now. If anything was certain it was that Taehyung took studying way more seriously than you did.
"Where..?" Your mind is kind of a mess right now but you try to remind yourself that this is Taehyung. Worldwide superstar Taehyung whose apart of the biggest boy band in the world. If anyone saw you two together or even thought to take a picture of you two together everything would be ruined.
"Somewhere. C'mon."
Your mom had told you many times growing up, never talk to strangers. She especially told you to never ever get into cars with strangers. As you're sitting in the passenger seat of Taehyungs car, you wonder if your mom's shpeal applies to a moment like this. Well, Taehyung wasn't exactly a stranger. And with the way he made you cum you don't think you'd ever let him become a stranger.
"What you are thinking?" A warm hand on your thigh snaps you out of your thoughts. He probably thought something was wrong since you were looking out the window with your arms crossed. To be fair, there was no way you could be relaxed in this situation. The big hand that covers the vast majority of your thigh definitely helps though.
"Nothing." You say quietly. To be completely honest, you can't really remember what you were thinking about, the simple gesture of putting a comforting hand on you having wiped your memory entirely.
"Nothing?" You can hear the way Taehyung's voice drops an octave, turning it into some kind of seductive murmur. His hand drifts a little higher and he gives a light squeeze, his fingers pressing into your inner thigh delectably. Fuck sake, can this man give you a break?
"Ye-yeah... nothing." You stutter. Were you really touch starved to the point where a mere hand on your thigh had you salivating? You guess so.
"Really nothing?" His hand rests there for a little while before moving under your skirt. Your breath hitches and your legs open the tiniest bit as if on instinct. That seems to grab Taehyung's attention because, for the first time during the car ride, his eyes flicker towards you then back to the road. He inhales deeply then lets out a slow exhale.
"Taehyung..." You meant to say his name as a warning but it comes out as more of a breathy moan. A pair of fingers press against you through the thin material of your panties. You only wore them because you wanted to feel pretty but it looks like they came in handy.
Before you can bask in the feeling of Taehyungs fingers rubbing against you, he pulls away and puts both hands back on the wheel. A couple of curse words you don't understand stumble from his mouth and suddenly he's pulling over.
"Wha..?"
"Backseat. Now." Taehyung parks the car and everything starts to make sense when you see him unbuckle his seatbelt haphazardly.
"We're doing this here?" Surprise is evident in your tone and okay, yeah, maybe car sex has been on your bucket list for a while now, and maybe doing it with Taehyung in the back of his expensive GV80 wasn't such a bad idea.
"Was gonna take you to our hotel but too far. Can't wait anymore. Get in the backseat right now." Taehyung licks his lips and when you meet his eyes you finally notice how dark they are. You quickly unbuckle your own seatbelt and crawl over the armrest console into the comfy leather seats. You could honestly fall asleep here.
"You look fucking delicious." Taehyung slowly pushes you down until your laying on your back and he's looking down at you. The glint in his eyes is something ominous and hungry. He was looking at you as if you were his next meal. No guy has ever looked at you with this much lust in their eyes.
"Touch me, please." You don't want to sound needy but holy shit all you've been able to think about these past few weeks is Taehyung fucking the life out of you. By the looks of it, you're not the only one.
"Soon." Is all he says before pressing soft lips against yours. The kiss starts off slow, the two of you learning the other's motions almost like you were dancing. When you let out a breathless pant, he slips his tongue in your mouth, and all of a sudden things aren't moving as slow anymore. You bring your hand up and slide your fingers into Taehyung's silky hair easily, inadvertently making him kiss you harder.
"I hope- I hope you didn't replace me..." Taehyung pulls away for a second only to press light pecks down your jaw, all the way down to your neck. "... while I was gone."
"I didn't. Promise. I waited for you. Please..." Taehyung sucks dark hickeys into your neck, sucking until you hissed in pain. You always had a sensitive neck and the man above you was truly making the most of it.
"Good. Don't want one- anyone in this hole beside me. This pussy is mine." As if to emphasize his point, he grinds his hips down against yours and fuck, there's no way he's that hard already.
"Ah, Tae-" You moan at the feeling of him rubbing against you. Even with the layers and layers of clothes in the way, you could feel perfectly just how thick and long he was. Not to mention the clear possession in his voice.
He already had you wrapped around his finger.
"Ah, jinjja, I can't believe this. You forget what I said last time?" Taehyung pulls away to unbuckle his belt and the action alone has your brain buffering.
"Eyes are up here, jagiya." He uses a singular finger to tilt your chin up and his voice is doing that thing again. That thing where it's deep and smooth like butter and you can practically taste the flirtation in his tone.
"Answer me. You forgot, hm? Call me oppa." As soon as his pants are off, he's sliding down your body and flipping up your short, pleated skirt. You're not exactly sure what he's about to do until he leans in close to your lower abdomen, bites the thin waistband of your panties, and pulls them down your thighs slowly with his mouth.
"I'm waiting." He mumbles, letting go of the panties and letting the waistband snap against your thighs. He spreads your legs apart as far as they can go with them bounded together by your expensive underwear. Then he's flicking his tongue across your clit, purposely teasing.
"Oh- oppa, fuck!" You throw your head back when he finally drags the flat of his tongue up your slick folds, giving it a few more slow licks.
"Wanted to taste you for so long-" The words stumble out his mouth quickly and he doesn't take his lips off you for a second.
Taehyung's focus shifts back to your clit, spurred on by your airy moans. Your fingers are itching to knot themselves in his hair again - you just want to pull him closer, grind your hips into him. It's too much and not enough at the same time.
"Oh my god, oh my..." Taehyung swallows and looks up at you with dark eyes, his cheeks and ears a light shade of red as he licked his lips. Your wetness was all over his chin and the corners of his mouth and you've seriously never seen a guy enjoy giving oral so much. For god's sake, he looked like he was about to ascend.
"It's wet." He moans. The words were so simple and obvious but the way he said it, god, you want it on repeat.
A big hand drifts up your thigh slowly as his mouth wraps around your clit again. While the hand on your thigh kneads the skin there gently, his other hand is inching between your legs. Nothing can prepare you for the feeling of two long fingers pressing into you.
"Ah, ah- wait-" The fingers slide in easily with how wet you are. It seems he hasn't forgotten where your sweet spot is if the way he curls his fingers directly into that bundle of nerves indicates anything.
"You like it, hm? It's just fingers but you're going crazy. It feel that good?" Taehyung growls, sucking on your sensitive bud lightly as he thrusted his fingers inside you, curling them each time and making you see stars.
"Answer me, jagiya." He says around your clit. If he kept this up you'd be coming embarrassingly fast.
"Mnnhh, I like it. I like- I like it a lot." You try your best to speak a coherent sentence but you end up cutting yourself off with your own stuttered moans.
"Tae, close. So close..." You try to warn him but he ignores you entirely. Instead, he continues sucking and opening you up with his fingers, even as your orgasm flows through your whole body, making you spasm a little.
"Mashisoyo," Taehyung says it quietly like he's talking to himself. He removes his two fingers from inside you and admires the way your cum seeps out of you. He prides himself on his work but he wasn't near close to being done.
"Wait- wait, what're..." You barely get a second to calm down before Taehyungs mouth is back on you. He spreads your thighs apart farther using both hands and swipes his tongue up your folds, collecting every drop of your cum on his tongue and swallowing it down with a satisfied 'mmm'.
"Fuck sake, are you real? How can you taste so good?" He sighs against you before pressing his tongue inside your hole. You writhe under him, sensitive and overstimulated.
"Hard. So hard right now. I need it inside you." Taehyung sits up and when your vision unblurs, you can clearly see the way his cock strains against his designer boxers.
Designer boxers?
"Let me?" At this moment, you can't help thinking that Taehyung looks cute here. He's sitting up, rutting helplessly against his hand. Rosy cheeks, parted lips, and an aching cock. An aching cock he needed you to fix.
"Of course." As soon as the confirmation exits your mouth, he's freeing himself from his boxers and sliding the restricting material down his thighs. He tosses the underwear somewhere in the car. He'd deal with it later.
"Woah, I forgot... how big you were..." Suddenly recollections from your last sexual encounter with the idol flood your memory. The way the tip of his cock brushed against your cervix, the way it hurt but it felt so good. The same fear that he wouldn't fit still grazed your skin as last time but you weren't any less determined to take him. Lord knows you needed him just as much as he needed you right now.
"Ah, don't say a thing like that... embarrassing." He tries to turn away to hide his embarrassment but you can see the smile curling on his lips. How was it possible for a guy with a dick this big to be so humble? It was insane.
"I'll insert now." He says, slotting his hips between yours.
"Insert?" You repeat, confused. You've never heard someone use the term 'insert' while having sex.
"Did I say it right? It means put in, you know?" You really can't help laughing at that. That laugh quickly turns into a groan of pleasure when you feel the thick head of his cock press against your folds, threatening to split you open.
"Fuck, it's hot." Taehyung has to stop himself before he can fully get his tip inside because the last time he had sex was a month and a half ago and holy shit, he might actually cum prematurely.
"You-you're stretching me open, oppa." Hearing you call him 'oppa' seems to awaken something inside him. You bite your lip hard in an attempt to suppress your whimpers as he gradually slides in deeper.
"Ahh, it's hugging me." Taehyung closes his eyes tightly as he buries himself inside you to the hilt. Somehow, being so deep inside you made him feel at home.
Slowly, very slowly, he starts building a rhythm, grinding into you with careful and precise thrusts. You're not completely sure if he's moving gently for you or himself but you're very grateful.
You part your lips slightly to let out a moan as Taehyung's cock drags along your walls. Before you can properly let a sound out, he's pressing his lips against yours again. Unlike before, he's immediately licking into your mouth, almost as if he can't get enough of you, like he needs to taste you to survive.
"Perfect. Perfect for me. Perfect and tight just for me." As you both adjust to the beautifully familiar feeling of each other, he starts to move faster. He pulls away from your lips and presses them back against your neck. For some reason, getting fucked in Taehyung's expensive car was ten times as luxurious as any other one night stands you've ever had.
"Tae, it feels-" You never considered you to be extremely vocal in bed but somehow this man managed to drag every sound, every moan from the back of your throat like it was nothing.
"Feel good? I feel good." He groans against your neck. He's been holding back this whole time but the longer he's inside you, the harder it gets to control himself.
"You don't- fuck, I'm not made of glass, you can go harder." You slip your hands under his shirt and glide them over the expanse of his back. His skin was a bit damp from how hot the car had gotten.
"Really?" You feel him smirk against your neck before his lips brush over the shell of your ear.
"So, more? I don't know, little girl, what if I break you?" He enunciates the word 'break' with a particularly rough thrust that has you seeing literal stars. That along with the way he's whispering and lightly biting your ear has you shivering under him with need. You need more.
"Mm- ah, break me! I don't care." You whine loudly. At first, you were happy he was letting you adjust but right now you needed his thick cock fucking you into these leather seats.
His objective seems to change after that. Instead of teasing you relentlessly, his hips start moving at an ungodly rate, the head of cock nudging at your cervix as if it was trying to get its attention. It was a dangerous feeling and you know what could happen if you got injured up there, but it felt so good. The way he filled you up so perfectly, rubbing against that bundle of nerves even when he pulled out just to thrust back in was just too addicting.
He growls something in Korean and if you could use half of your brainpower right now, you'd try and figure out what but you could literally feel Taehyung in your guts and it's hard to focus on anything else.
"Naekkeo..." His breathing gets heavier and his thrusts are starting to get sloppier. You barely notice, though, with your second orgasm already rearing around the corner.
"Who does this belong to, hm?" He says between breaths. The sound of skin slapping skin was so loud in the car and you wonder if the vehicle was shaking with how hard Taehyung was pounding into you. There's no way it wasn't.
"Who does this fucking pussy belong to?" He reiterates and the clear dominance behind his words has you keening. You wonder if you could cum just from him speaking to you like that.
"Y- ya- you! Belong- belongs to- you!" You clench hard around him when you feel your orgasm ripple through you in waves, one after the other till your head was thrown back and you were calling out Taehyung's name like a mantra.
"Tight, nnha, it's fucking... tight..." Taehyung's restraint was quickly deteriorating and before he can even form a cognitive thought he's coming inside you. His hips buck wantonly as you practically milk him dry with how hard you're clenching around him. The feeling of his warm cum pumping inside you nearly makes your eyes roll back. You truly missed that feeling.
"I shouldn't have- ah, I came inside..." Taehyung raises his eyebrows in a shocked, worried expression and slaps a hand over his mouth. It takes you a moment to come back to reality but when you do, the first thing you see is an anxious Taehyung. It makes your blood run cold.
"What happened? Was it bad?" You sit up, your initial reaction being to comfort him. He pulls out carefully and you feel his cum oozing out of you, seeping onto the fancy leather seats. Oh.
Oops.
"No, no. So good. But this could be bad." He gives a nervous chuckle and looks down where you're practically leaking. You bite your lip at the sight. It was kinda hot.
"I'm on the pill and I'm clean, so don't worry." You giggle at your forward-thinking. After the promise of a second time with Taehyung, there was no way you were letting him pull out again. You had a bit of a breeding kink but there was no way you were getting pregnant. Thank god for birth control
"Pill? What pill?" He tilts his head, clearly confused but his lips turn up in a smile after seeing you giggle.
"Birth control. It prevents pregnancies." You explain it simply. He makes a sound of understanding and nods before throwing his arms around you and pulling you into his lap. Now it's your turn to be confused.
"Let's hug like this for a while then I take you back to the hotel. Couple minutes away." His arms are wrapped around your waist and he's pressing his nose against your neck, just breathing you in.
"I thought you said it was too far of a drive." A smirk graces your features.
"I just couldn't wait."
★━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━★
[© seokiie]
[I do not allow any translating, editing, reposting, or use of any my work!!]
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timextoxhajima · 3 years
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The Boyz as things and feelings (just cause)
this is a small thing @haechanhues​ needed help with so i decided to make it an actual post uwu [this is gonna be pretty long cause i might write little scenarios]
[THE BOYZ AS THINGS AND FEELINGS]
SANGYEON - MIRRORS AND PILLOWS
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mirrors make a place look bigger than it really is - i feel like sangyeon has that ability to make you feel like you’re more important on your worst days
the things he’ll do just to make sure you’re alright, even when he knows you’re not
he also has the ability to reflect what you need: sad? he’ll come and hug you and let you cry or talk about your shitty day. happy? he’ll joke about the way you snort while laughing then he’d probably do something dumb to keep the energy up there
mirrors also feel very private and at-home, and that exactly how i feel he curates an environment
pillows are self-explanatory ig, smth to cry into, smth to fall asleep with while hugging, has the best homely scents ever, very comfortable
i imagine going home after a long day and finding your partner also tired, but he’s cooking or like in the couch watching tv and he just invites you into his arms uwu
“tell me about everything! whatever that makes you happy or sad and i’ll try my best to be who you need at that point of time!”
JACOB - FLOWERS AND MUSIC
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ok like jacob with a guitar is just a stellar sight to behold, he looks like he was born to hold one, and his vocals are super underrated imo, most of tbz’s discography doesnt really suit his voice - i really wish he had a chance to have more lines in more ballads or maybe even a solo thing
he would drag you out to go on walks after he knows you’ve buried yourself in your work the whole day, and he’d be the kind to stop at a pretty flower and contemplate plucking it but he wouldn’t cause he’s a fairy and wouldn’t hurt a fly, much less a pretty flower
would probably play a piece in the background while you’re stressed w work and hum a tune so the singing wouldn’t distract you
would stop when he notices you stopped working and your sad ass is probably crying lmao
he’s a very soft and gentle man imo
he’s the innocent daisy amidst other bright colored, flamboyant flowers but he still stands out
“i’ll grow you a rose bush in the yard so i don’t have to be sad about plucking flowers next time.”
YOUNGHOON - WINTER COATS AND COFFEE AND PASTRIES
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he definitely radiates tsundere vibes on first sight, but when you get to know him, he’s obviously the opposite: a crybaby
but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t keep up his model-like appearances when he’s outside - in fact, he’d be the one to influence you into caring more about how you look (of course not materialistically, but more into actually caring about making yourself feel good with your fashion and appearance)
i chose winter coats as a symbol of coverage - he doesn’t show much of himself unless he’s close to you (like when you wear winter coats to keep warm, he’s a burrito because he doesn’t bother too much about sharing his feelings), but when he does, it feels like he has the ability to keep you warm and comfortable, even on the coldest days, even if his inner savage comes out
it’ll be like he scooped you into his coat and has you warm in one of this inner breast pockets
i see him as the kind to get regular coffee and like, a tart or something, at a cafe. it adds on to the warmth, when he remembers what you like. the details. maybe you like your coffee with cinnamon or less sugar or something, but then he tops it up with a muffin and he knows you like it heated up so he specifically asks for them to do so
ok but he’s defo the kind of guy that catches people’s attention at public spaces so every now and then when he’s laughing or smiling, some girl would gawk at him and he would be embarrassed about it, but lucky for you, you’re already wearing matching coats so they know the man’s taken uwu
“if only they knew how long it took to convince you to wear that coat.”
HYUNJAE - CONCERTS AND CONVENIENCE STORE DATES
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classy but calm. dream-like but realistic. 
i say concerts as in the instrumental, ballad kinds. he loves it and he knows you probably need the sleep where you have that kind of background white noise/music that provides you the best quality of sleep there is. but when you’re not dosing off, he’s admiring how much time you’re willing to invest into being at something he loves
of course, in turn, he doesn’t complain much when you’re hungry and you meet him down the street at the nearest convenience store for some instant noodles and potato chips with a coke and he lets you ramble about your day 
he would probably buy you an ice cream just so you’d feel better, then regret it when you get a stomachache later cause it was like 2am in the morning
you probably have like 5 of his hoodies at home that you refuse to wash cause his scent is tainted all over it and the only time he gets to take them home is when he stays over or visits and he sneaks one into his bag when you’re in the kitchen making tea or a bowl of noodles
then you’ll get it back without even knowing it was gone
the kind that would probably surprise you after a day of work with a casual date idea to the movies, and i mean showing up at your place, impromptu, after he knows you’re home with two tickets 
“act like my girlfriend for once and go on a date with me, would you? your work isn’t going to be there with you when you die at 90.”
JUYEON - STARGAZING AND VR GAMES
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as dumb and sometimes bimbotic as he seems he is, he’s gotten most of the visible constellations memorised and he would not hesitate from telling you all about his childhood with his family when they would travel and try to spot every single constellation they can remember
which brings me to the point where he remembers what you like, but... backhandedly. he doesn’t remember what you like but he remembers what you hate instead, so you don’t ever have to worry about getting that licorice flavoured jelly bean
he would offer a midnight walk to help you relieve your stress, cause he knows you just like seeing the nightsky amidst the peace and quiet while he rambles on for his own satisfaction. not everything has to be so emotionally attached and shared. you can share blissful moments without being the reason for each other’s and that’s totally fine.
juyeon is kind of a scaredy cat in the sense that he isn’t really into horror movies or games but he’s always had that dream to become a pilot and so for his birthday, you brought him to a vr game arcade where he played some plane simulator and ever since, you’ve been taking turns to surprise each other with a new vr arcade spot or adding on to the vr game console set you have at home
“maybe i should digitalise you so i can see you in the vr game”
KEVIN - KARAOKE SESSIONS AND NEON LIGHTS
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the best-friend kind of partner you would come across once in a lifetime
a billion film shots of you after he drags you to the karaoke and he beats you at super intense songs like the bohemian rhapsody just cause he can hit those high notes and solely because he was screaming on the floor when he did it
almost left his film camera behind 
absolutely LOVES those walks along streets where there are a million neon lights
would come across that one sus neon light signs that indicate a sex toy store and he would give you that sly smile and probably joke for you to go in 
kevin has a moon neon light in his room and you have a star or something (whatever you want)
corrects your grammar and pronunciation, only for you two to bicker about it even more when you use google translation and there are different pronunciations depending on where/what accent you’re using
he really is your light in the dark, even if he’s known to be introverted. once he’s comfortable enough with you, he makes you feel like the most important person in the world
has one of those portable speaker microphones at home and he drones on and on and on with some billie eilish song until you hurl a pillow at him
“so you’re the tough girl, like it really rough girl, justcan’tgetenoughofkevingirl, chest always so puffed girl”
CHANHEE - DUETS AND STRAWBERRY PICKING
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(i could not find a more candid, softer aesthetic pic for chanhee rip)
his entire wardrobe fits you - the only problem is that he’ll never let you wear it in fear that you’d stain or tear something
shared playlists because that’s how similar your taste in music is, and so sometimes when you have your earpiece in and you’re humming the melody of that song, chanhee picks it up immediately despite not hearing that song, and ends up harmonising with you
got kicked out of the library once or twice because it was exam period and the two of you won’t shut up
ironically doesn’t sing that much if you’re not around
chanhee is a true blue introvert - which is a miracle that you’ve managed to tear through that barrier of his and find out that he giggles at every stupid thing you do: he’s having a bad day? trip over the pavement. he’ll laugh. it works
dragging him out to go strawberry picking was so difficult - but of course chanhee isn’t safe from how beautiful and enticing the fresh fruits were.
didn’t touch anything strawberry flavoured OR any strawberries for the next month or so
his straightforwardness comes with the breakdown of his barrier - but that’s what brings you comfort. he will never lie, he will only be sarcastic and even then, you’d know it’s true
i used duets as a symbol of harmony and being in-sync, though never really exactly the same, and that’s how it is with chanhee. your thoughts are very similar even though he’s much more introverted than you, but that’s what binds you 
“i’m gonna tell the librarian i don’t know you if we get kicked out again.”
CHANGMIN - CITY TOURS AND MATCHING OUTFITS
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city tours - the kind that you already know inside out and yet you STILL travel the area as if you were a tourist 
that’s exactly how it is with changmin: you know him inside out, after being friends for so long, but it never gets old
you’re used to him biting your hand out of nowhere and yet it startles you all the time. that stupid chucky doll in his living room? old, but it never fails to scare you
he doesn’t ever talk about it that much, but he loves it when you co-ordinate outfits
no, it doesn’t mean you wear couple tees, but it’s aesthetically pleasing to changmin that if he wears cool tones, you would too
he’d be reserved about his thoughts and feelings sometimes but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t think or feel them
there’s a strange sense of familiarity with changmin, because you kind of know what to expect but then you’re never disappointed, you know?
“i got you this white pigeon cause it looks like the one i already got... you can give it back to me if you don’t like it though-” /he takes it before you can accept it/
HAKNYEON - STAND UP COMEDY SHOWS AND RUNNING ALONG THE BEACH
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there’s something about ju that makes it very casual and easy-going
he hates horror genred themes so fuck that, he would queue online just for the latest ali wong comedy show, even if it’s an online show, and he would laugh until he cried
sometimes he’s a drama queen but that makes it alot easier for you to know what he’s thinking or feeling - it makes communication alot easier
that means a lack of arguments
he’s also very empathetic but straightforward, exactly like how comedy shows are - because they are relatable, they are funny because they bring out the irony and sarcasm and all the dumb things in life that people are sometimes afraid of talking about and hak just says whatever he wants to say, even if he knows it might be hurtful or upsetting
he prioritises truth and honesty over anything else
it makes you a better person, honestly
beach walks - very calming, very liberating. he lets you yell and scream and kick sand back into the water because you can, and he does it with you
tries to teach you how to skip rocks but you suck and you can’t so he just pulls you away from the pile of rocks you amassed
“flick your wrist like that, not like you’re meowing!”
SUNWOO - SOCCER FRIENDLIES AND STUDIO SESSIONS
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he will NOT go easy on you in a friendly match: you might be one of the fastest players of the female team but he’s ruthless in his ball-stealing, so even if you were fast enough to keep the ball out of his reach, he’d still be able to snatch it right out between your feet
very, very competitive and does not like to lose
you would always play the ‘ladies first’ card but then he’d throw the ‘feminism’ card back at you 
sometimes you act more like siblings than anything else 
the only time when he isn’t fuming with competition is if you’re injured because he accidentally tackled you - he’ll gracefully give himself a yellow card before absolutely trashing you in the next match
has one foot into the production game recently - likes to play with the beat board and mixing tunes, and since you’ve had your hand in doing music remixes for a deejay job before, you’re there to identify which songs have the same bass line or beat counts for easier mixing
would make you a playlist of remixes but wouldn’t admit that he spent a whole day in the studio without you just so it would be a surprise
a soft boy stuck in the wraps of an egoistic man
“a day? please. i illegally downloaded half these remixes off the internet cause i’d think you’re too internet-dumb to find them.”
ERIC - BAKING AND SKATEBOARDING
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full of impromptu, casual ideas to hang out 
baking is a fucking mess - why did he suggest it when he doesn’t even have the right ingredients?
wanted to replace eggs with water - like ok thats supposedly healthier, but why????????????
he likes cleaning so that was the only fucking bonus in baking - had to call his mom for help halfway through because the cookies looked more like goop than playdough
gave up in the end and he repaid his debt by helping clean your kitchen
tried to teach you how to skateboard, but he ended up falling off his own in the process and now he’s got a grazed knee 
the kind of person you’d have so much chaotic fun with, he’s that friend your mom told you to NOT hang out with that much if not you’d get run down by a car 
has the most fucking random pieces of clothing in his wardrobe, like where did he even get that pink coat from?
“no you have to do this and like lift up your leg and then kinda rest your weight on it before flicking your ankle and like- whOA- OH OW OHNO OHOHOH OW”
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im-gettingby · 3 years
Text
WIP Wednesday
Thank you to @aristocratic-otter and @bookish-bogwitch who tagged me this week and also lots of other weeks even though I have not participated in a WHILE.
Adding a bunch of snippets because…I have a lot to finish and motivation would be 💯
From Ch 3 of If I Could Turn Back Time:
“Absolutely useless without your fists,” a haughty voice crows. “Tell me, are you going to take out the Insidious Humdrum with a well-placed punch? I doubt he’s corporeal.”
As for young Baz…I could stake him right now. I meet my Baz’s panicked eyes and try to communicate, cast something! This is not the kind of thing we were trained for. Our students are respectful! They don’t try to off one another because of an assignment about, ironically, conflict resolution.
“Give peace a chance!” Baz casts, and I recall it from the times Ebb had to spell us apart. Both Baz and Simon fall backwards, repelling each other like magnets.
From Ch 4 of Summer Haze:
Manju doesn’t reply for a few seconds. “Ah. Well, Simon…” She pauses for a moment, then clears her throat. “I hope you and your friend used prophylactics. I mean, protection. Condoms,” she adds, awkwardly.
I cough. My face is burning. Kidnapped by vampires, engaging in casual sex—Manju isn’t too far off the mark, honestly.
“I’m not sure if anyone has spoken to you about that,” she adds. “If you want to talk to someone, I mean...I can find someone. Or a book. I’ll go to the library and find a book,” she says, with slightly more resolve.
“That’s okay!” I cringe. “I’ve gotten that talk. Don’t worry.” From Dr. Wellbelove, in fact. There’s nothing more awful than getting the Talk from your girlfriend’s dad. Well, I can do you one better—nothing more awful than getting the Talk right after he’s examined your bollocks and made you cough twice.
From a stoner au inspired by @mostlymaudlin and starwarned that will probably end up being my Erotic Grope Fest submission unless I come up with something I like more:
That’s how, around ten, I’m already dozing off. I excuse myself before I can do something truly mortifying like falling asleep on Simon’s shoulder. (I’d probably drool; I have an embarrassing overbite. And this is not the way I want to introduce Simon’s body to my saliva.) (I’m disturbed, I know.)
From a deleted draft of my Anon Fest fic, which I think I’ll probably publish on its own eventually:
I shove my whole weight onto my hands, expecting him to resist, but he doesn’t. Instead he lifts his neck so that our faces are close together. “Do it, Snow. What you came here to do.”
Kill him, he means.
He’s mocking me. He knows that I can’t. Somehow, he knows it’s not part of the plan…
“Not. Yet,” I spit back.
“Really? Wouldn’t have expected you of all people to play with your food,” he growls. “Golden boy enjoys a bit of torture, then?”
A snippet from a very disjointed post-AWTWB situation that is basically five fics, none of which are long enough to post alone, smacked together:
“I already told you! You know, Snow, maybe you’d feel better if you revealed some of your secrets.”
“You know my secrets,” I say, earnestly, desperately, because I want him to. I want him to cut me open and map out my insides. I want him to hold my beating heart in his hand, to run his tongue along the veins, and to memorize me by touch and taste.
He smirks, and then he says the magic word (not literally, but as good as). “Please.”
And lastly, a WIP I started TODAY bc @skeedelvee is a genius and their fics live in my brain always but especially Sextuplets:
“There you are!”
I groan against Simon 4’s lips and sigh. I turn around, and Simon 2 is standing in the doorway. At least he has the sense to look a little embarrassed.
“What?” I ask. I glance at Simon 4, who is vibrating with the effort of not blowing up at Simon 2. (They all agreed to a truce after fifteen minutes of screaming, which has been tenuous at best. Simon Snow is jealous—who would have guessed?) (I’d be lying if I said I didn’t enjoy it.)
“I was thinking we could go get ice cream while it’s still light out?” Simon 2 says. They all have slightly different personalities. Simon 2 goes stir-crazy, and Simon 4 goes me crazy, although he’s polite about it. (Simon 6 is not polite about it, which is its own brand of alluring.)
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voltagesmutter · 4 years
Text
Satan x MC - Public.
Pairing: Satan x MC (F).
Fandom: Obey Me.
Prompt:  Asphyxiation || Orgasm Denial || Public
Warning: Warning: Public sex, mutual pining, vaginal sex, hand-job, fingering, talks of masterbation, angry Satan.
Day 2 of Kinktober event/prompt list.
Amazing thank you to @crystal13unny for being my beta 💛
Mid-terms were looming and overstressed didn’t come close to explaining how everyone felt. Whilst life was normally chaotic amongst demons, this way beyond words due to how dysfunctional life had become. Mammon had been “retail therapy” shopping so much that goldie broke, Asmo repainted his nails at least four times a day, while Leviathan's beloved console was becoming dusty with neglect. All because Lucifer was bringing forth tenfold his normal strictness to ensure revisions happened, causing tension to run through the household.
Beel was stress eating, which meant consuming triple what he normally ate, hardly leaving anything in the fridge. To say Lucifer lost his shit would be an understatement. He was livid causing sparks of arguments to fly across the house of Lamentation. Of course as soon he started, Satan retaliated as he always did. 
“Will you be considerate for just once and not eat us out of food!” Slamming the fridge shut, his red eyes pulsing with anger, “Shouldn’t you be studying rather than indulging in your gluttonous ‘habits’,”. It was asked as a question but meant clearly as a statement.
“Lay off him Lucifer! You know how he gets around exams,” The blonde rolling his eyes at Lucifer's comment, the others around him on the table all going silent, eyes falling upon him before darting back to Lucifer for his response. 
“Don’t you start getting involved Satan, keep your nose out where it doesn’t belong,”.
“Doesn’t belong? You're openly yelling at Beel for something he can’t help, just back off Lucifer, I am sick of you breathing down everyone’s necks!” the sound of Satan's fist slamming down on the oak table range clearly through the air. The tension was thick in the room, one wrong move and it would set alight, causing a blaze to rupture in the household. All it took was a tutt and snide remark from Lucifer before Satan dashed across the room and pinned him against the kitchen counter, fists balled up in a firm grasp with the material of the eldest shirt.
“Another word Lucifer and I swear,” Satan hissed, his normal soft demeanour now lost in a sea of wrath. Green eyes normally the colour of soft apple candy now shone dark with tinges of yellow, the iced-cold anger behind them enough to make any human freeze and shiver with fear. Lucifer was no human and went unfazed at the younger's outburst, simply pushing him off him with a, “If you cared this much as your midterms rather than your dopey siblings you could actually pass them with a decent grade,”.  
It took the strength of Leviathan and Mammon, quickly running from the table to grip Satan to stop him from swinging at Lucifer. A simple tut, a wave of his hand and a “childish,” was all he left them with before exiting. 
“I’ll kill him, I’ll actually fucking kill him,” Satan screamed, chest heaving up and down as the others tried to calm him down. 
“Who we killing?” A young girl came strolling into the kitchen, yawning as she did, stretching her arms above her head causing her shirt to slide up and expose her stomach slightly. 
“Morning cutie!” Asmo rushed to her side, wrapping an arm around her waist and pulling her with him back to the table. 
“Lucifer,” Belphine huffed, head resting upon the table with his eyes shut. 
“Oh I’m in,” Reaching for for a slice of toast only to out it back when she saw a scorpion tale sticking out of the crust, demon food was just not her thing, “He’s been on my case for the last few weeks, I’ve hardly had any time to myself because of his schedule he’s made for me,” her eyes fell to Satan who was still heaving in the corner, before swapping a confused expression with Levi. Levi touched the tip of his nose twice, a signal between the pair to indicate an argument had/or was about to break out. 
“You okay there?” She asked, standing up and walking a few paces forward to lean against the counter, meeting Satan’s eyes.
“Yeah just old bossy arse ruining everything as usual,” He murmured, breath finally calm. 
“Don’t let him wind you up, you know he gets a kick out of seeing you so angry,” She lent over and gave his hand a gentle squeeze. A shared look amongst the other brothers and just as Mammon was about to protest the gesture, Levithan stamped on his foot to keep him quiet. 
There was something between the two, they were the best of friends, anyone and everyone could see that. It was also apparent the sexual tension that lingered between the two, slowly building up, waiting to overspill. While they loved each other as friends, certain feelings now occurred between them. He found himself rather embarrassed at fisting his cock to the thought of her nearly every night, whilst she let his name slip between her lips when her vibrator brought her to orgasm. Neither knowing or revealing how they felt for the sake of their friendship. As if too blind to recognise their feelings for each other. 
“So what was he going off about this morning?” She asked the room, going into the fridge and opening a cartoon of juice.
“Beel’s eating,” Levithan answered, watching as Beel was still moping in the corner of the room, kicking fallen debris on the floor with a huff. 
“Oh Beelze! Are you stressing eating again?” She asked, feeling sympathy for him, she did for all of them. Whilst they were demons, they had no control over their powers, each of them having their own individual quirks tied to their demonic power. 
“Yeah-” sulked from the red-head in the corner, scuffing his shoes along the floor. 
“Oh honey I’m sorry,” She took a sip out of the juice she’d poured into a clean cup, “I mean he cancelled my date for me for the other day, deemed it as not suitable time for doing my studying,”. 
The word ‘date’ made Satan’s ears prick up, he repeated the word out loud causing everyone to turn to him. 
“Hmm, with one of them cutie players from Beel’s team I do believe,” Asmo chimed in, causing a blush to grace the girls cheeks, “Muscular, tall, handsome, a little dim-witted but still!”. 
A string of curses falls from Satan’s mouth, pushing his brothers off of him, a ‘this day keeps getting fucking better’ is all he says before storming out of the room. The slam of the door is enough to signal his departure.
“What's wrong with him?” She questioned, watching how the brothers all turned to each other before her slowly.
“Isn’t it obvious? He l-” Mammon rolls his eyes with a tut but if cut off by Asmo jumping in, “He’s just stressed sweetie, he’s probably gone up to the library so why don’t you go check on him for us,”. Asmo doesn’t take a second for her response, taking the cup out of her hand and putting it down, practically shoving her out of the room. “But Asmo I!” But her protests are cut short as he shuts the door behind her. 
“You!” He hisses to Mammon who blinks in confusion.
“The fuck did I do? I can’t help that Satan is too much of a pussy to admit his feelings, The Great Mammon would never chicken out like that,”. 
“Shut up Mammon, you big idiot, let Satan tell her himself,” Levi added, the group of remaining brothers now sitting around the table. 
“You think she likes him back?” Beel asked, causing a snort from Asmo.
“Please! Have you seen the way she stares at him? I also know about her little nightly activities,” He sings in a sickly song, wiggling his eyebrows.
“Asmo the fuck that’s gross. I didn’t need to know they were fucking, no wonder he was upset she had a date,” Belphegor sighed, throwing a book at him.
“Oh sweetie no, they’ve not done it yet, but the way she says his name at night she definitely wants too,”.
“How do you even know that?”.
“I’m the avatar of lust sweetie,” Asmo rolls his eyes and flicks his wrist with annoyance at even having to state it, “Plus her room is next to mine and the other night there was definitely a ‘Satan’ slipped between them plump lips after a good ten-minutes of buzzing,”.
“Stupid human, should be thinking of me instead of him,” Mammon pouted, crossing his arms infront him as he sulked like a child.
“Lets just hope the pair admit how they feel,” Levi stated, each of the brothers secretly praying for their brother.
-
Asmo’s hunch was right, the young girl found Satan angrily moping on the first floor of the library within the house. He had his back against the wooden bookcase sat on the floor, book in lap but little attention being paid to it.
“Hey,” She smiled, taking a few steps forward waiting for his response. He grunted, trying to bury himself in the book without looking up at her. 
“Can I sit?”.
“Free place isn’t it,” he responded, flicking the page as she sat beside him, outstretched legs touching.
They sat in for a few moments in silence, Satan still pretending to be studying in his book until he finally broke it.
“So your date,” Finally closing the book and turning to her, “You never said anything,”.
“I,” Her face was blushing slightly, “I wasn’t really into him but I just, I felt too nice to say no,”. Her confession made them both laugh, finally breaking the tension between them. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you, I didn’t know how you would react,”.
“Me? What does it matter what I think?”.
“Your my best friend, your opinion matters the most,” She whispers, reaching between them and finding his hand, their fingers intertwining like they so often did especially when they sat in bed watching movies on a Friday night. 
It took a few minutes again before Satan spoke up, “I’m glad you didn’t go,”. 
“Oh?” He squeezed her hand, “I didn’t want to go anyway, I think he only asked because he overheard Beel teasing me about my lack of sex life,” she snorted a little with laughter, “I haven’t had sex since living in the human world. Do you know how long ago that was?” Her following words sending the demons cheeks a light pink, “I mean girls have needs too but I think Lucifer kind of got a whiff of why he wanted to take me out and well…”.
He knew exactly how many months to the exact day since she’d entered the Lamentation household, the shining ball of light that was herself weaving her way into all of their lives. How long it had been to even the touch of another person because the minute she walked into his life it lit a carnal desire which only she could quench. 
“I mean it’s been the same for me,” He laughs.
“Yeah, why is that? I always see the girls throwing themselves at you, you don’t seem that phased though?” She asked.
“I have my eye on someone else,” He rubbed his thumb over hers in a soft manner, “Someone important,”.
They shared a glance, the avatar of wrath melting into her eyes as if trying to convey the words he couldn't say out loud. Hers mirroring as she softly whispered his name.
“Satan I-...,” She started a waver in her voice, the feeling mutual for Satan to her. Both of them leaning until they were an eye-lash apart, her eyes slowly closing as Satan swallowed with an anxious breath.
It was unsure who started it but they kissed with a passion, tongues meeting in a sloppy exchange as he pulled her into his lap to straddle him. Both of them indulged in a feeling that this was right, that it was meant to be. Her hands fisted into his hair, both of them groaning as he held her waist whilst she subtly began to grind on him. 
“Is this okay?” He groaned against her lips as he unbuttoned her shirt slowly, just enough to cup her breast beneath it, thumbs tugging down the material of her bra to let her perky breasts stand free. His fingers rolling her nipples in his hands causing her to grind harder against him, heat pooling inside her stomach as her panties grew wetter by the second. 
“Yes, fuck Satan, yes don’t stop,” She replied, inhailing sharply as he pressed kisses to her neck, a trail leading down until his mouth latched over her breast.
Neither of them wanted to stop, losing themselves in the embrace of one another. When his hand skirted up her thigh beneath her skirt to rub against the wet patch of her panties she moaned his name, causing him to still for a second before continuing, the breathless way she called it made his cock stand solid. A moan he’d imagined thousands of times in his head, but none of it compared to the real thing. 
She popped the buttons on his jeans, palming his erection beneath the fabric before tugging them down just enough with his boxers for his cock to spring free. Her eyes widened as she marvelled at it, delicately taking it in the palm of her hand, his leaking head oozing wetness onto her skin.
“L-Like that,” Satan encouraged her after a few strokes, his mind fogging over at her movements. He let out a low groan against her neck, almost forgetting his brothers were only a few doors down from them and that they risked any one of the walking in.
“Your so wet,” His hand snaking beneath her panties to rub his index finger against her wet folds, her hips bucking into his touch. 
“Only for you Satan,” She whimpered, back arching as he pushed a finger inside her tight, wet heat. A noise like no-other left his lips as her walls gripped around his digit, pushing out to thrust back in until the grip around him loosened and he sped up his movements.
“Satan, I- more please,” Mouth formed in a delicate ‘o’ as two of his fingers worked inside her, knuckle deep and dripping with arousal. Her hand tightly around his cock, jerking it slowly as they both moaned into others mouths. Both eyes brimmed with lust, neither of them wanting to part from one and other for even a second.
“I can’t, I haven’t got a condom,” He swallowed, he may have one in his room but the thought of stopping now to search for one was too much. Even if she came around his fingers whilst he came on her hand, it would at least be enough to satisfy the need until they could be protected.
“I’m on,” Pressing her lips to his, pulling his hand away from her as she lined herself over his cock, “Birth control”. 
“Are you sure- fuck,” He groaned so loud the bookcase behind him trembled, the warmth of her tight walls stretching over him send his head flying backwards. It was unknown who said it, but a breathless ‘fuck’ was whispered as she lowered slowly over him. Satan pressing gentle kisses to her lips as she rose up before lowering back down, inching him further into her with each movement. She took a few moments to roll her hips slowly, Satan’s hands cupping her ass to help her down until he was fully hilted inside her. 
“Your perfect, so perfect,” Satan repeated over and over in a loving tone as her forehead pressed against his, slowly grinding movements of her hips in tightly circles.
Small rolls of her hips as his hands delicately ran from the curve of her ass to the smooth of her waist beneath her skirt, the sheer wetness dripping from her coaxing over his balls. The pit of her stomach dropped, mouth opening as her eyes expanded, the head of his cock rolling perfectly against her g-spot with each movement causing her to rock directly against that spot. His lips moved from hers, to her neck, moving down slightly to capture a nipple in his mouth as she moaned louder. He had to bite back the chuckle inside him to think for sure his brothers would hear them, but in this moment all he could focus on was the tight-heat eloping over his cock in gyrating movements. That he was claiming her, that she was his human. Heat pulsed throughout her body, feeling no shame at the sudden happening of her orgasm building. 
“I'm gonna cum, Satan, I’m gonna-” Fingernails digging into the soft green of his sweater, lips parted with her head tossed back, cheeks dusted a heavy pink as the tension in her stomach rose higher and higher. Satan’s hands working her hips, letting her move at her own leisure as she brought herself to the edge of climax, ready to be pushed off it. His vision was lost in her beauty, admiring each and every thing about her, how she was physically and mentally taking the air out of his lungs as her walls tightened over him. She came crying out his name, unable to hold back, an orgasm with the intensity like none before she had experienced. Drool pooled out the corner of her mouth, hands grasped onto him to keep her grounded as her vision flooded white, Satan’s hands pulling her down to be fully impaled by him as her walls flexed over his cock. Her sweating forehead pressed against his, rapid breaths falling from her mouth as she came down from her high, Satan groaning as her walls slowly stopped withering around him.
“Satan I lo-,” And just as she opened her eyes, they heard it from outside, Asmo screaming out.
“Lucifer don’t-!”. 
“I’m sorry,” Satan whispered, cupping her face as he pushed her off of him. The whimper she made broke his heart but he threw her behind the bookshelf, hissing at the loss of her warmth over him and the tightness of his jeans over his still solid cock as he tucked himself back in just in time for the door to burst open.
“Where is she!” Lucifer raging across the room in demon form, black onyx horns pulsing and Satan swore he could see steam coming out of his nose. “The fuck is she Satan!”.
“I don’t know what you mean, I’m simply revising as you told me too,” Satan peers up from the book he had tugged into his lap, although his sweating face, ruffled hair and panting breath was enough to signal otherwise. The heavy smell of sex dominating the aroma of the dusty library.
“Don’t play coy. I heard you down the corridor! You vile creature, tainting her like that, you should be ashamed Sata-” Lucifer barks but is stopped. Satan growled, anger controlling him as his demon form takes over, standing and pinning Lucifer against the wall as if he was merely as light as a book.
“I might not be good enough for her,” He hisses, tinged eyes pulsing with anger, “But I fucking love her, you have no right Lucifer, no right. Just because you can’t have her doesn’t mean you can control her,”. He gives a dark chuckle, smirking to see Lucifer's face fluster, “Yeah that’s what I thought, that's why you want us all to study, so you can keep her all to yourself but guess what Lucifer,”. Satan peered into his eyes before moving his hold to choke Lucifer, leaning to the side of him as he whispered in his ear, “It was my cock she was just coming over,” The whimper from Lucifer made Satan smug with pride, “So I suggest you leave, unless you want to watch me fuck her... Oh how glorious that would be seeing you wishing, no, lusting to be me as I drive my cock into her tight walls, for only me to ever do so. She’s my human Lucifer, mine,”. He lets out a cheshire grin before releasing his hold on Lucifer, watching him choke a few breaths before turning on his heels and leaving, his pride purely kicked to the curb. 
“Are you okay?” Satan turned back around, running to the bookcase where he had pushed the girl off, watching her nod from behind where she was hiding. “I’m so sorry you had to see that,” He whispered, cradling her in his arms, the moments of darkness passing as fast as it came, she bringing out the best and light out from inside him. 
“It’s okay, really I’m just glad he came in then and not when- you know, I guess we were a little loud,” She smiled with a light blush, her askew clothes now fixed, “Did you mean what you said… about Lucifer liking me…?”. 
“You can’t tell? That’s why he’s kept us all ‘studying’ to keep us away from you,” Satan tucking a strand of stray hair behind her ear.
“I didn’t realise, I mean- I didn’t realise you liked me either so,” A nervous laughter followed.
“All my brothers like you,” Cupping her face in his palm and stroking her lip with his thumb, “But I-... I love you,”. 
“I love you too Satan,” She whispered, wrapping her arms around his neck and pulling him down to kiss her. The kiss quickly deepend, the couple picking up their previous rhythm before being interrupted before she pulled away. Satan frightened he had scared her with his actions to Lucifer.
“Do you-” Twirling her index finger along his chest, hiding her face in a bashful manner, “Do you think that… we could finish this in your room?”.
“Of course, we don’t have to continue if you're uncomfortable,” Pressing a kiss to her forehead, a softer side of Satan that only she would ever get to see.
“No no!” She quickly added, “It’s just- Lucifer's room is next door and I- well, you know, I feel we owe him a little revenge for the past few weeks… and as well,”. Her hand moved down to cup his still hard cock through his jeans, “You didn’t get to finish,”.
“You are perfect, you know that?” Satan laughed, cupping her face again and kissing her nose.
“Um as well,”.
“Yes?”.
“Do you think the whole wall pinning and choking… we could-maybe-try it?” Her face burning red as Satan felt his cock twitch, the horns on the side of his that had subsided as his anger calmed now re-appeared but this time for lust, not anger. 
“Fuck me you’re so fucking perfect,” He mumbled once more, picking her up in his arms with her legs around his waist as he kissed her deeply, carrying her from the library to his room. 
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jay-and-dean · 4 years
Text
Don’t look down, Baby   Part 1/3
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Dean x reader
Summary :  Dean told her to ignore the “thing” between them and to jump in any guy’s arms. Any of them but him.
When we think of a guy our Y/n could be with, longing for Dean, it’s usually a nice dude, a little boring, right ? Because who can compete with Dean ? Now, what if this guy was as badass as Dean ?
Characters : Dean Winchesters, Sam Winchester, Reader, Abraham Hale (OC)
Warnings : Angst, jealous Dean, Smut (unprotected sex -you’re smarter than this !-, oral, also kinda lame sex if it’s a warning), cheating, swearing, smoking, drinking... More warnings in the second part.
Wordcount : 6k (yes, just the part one... now you get why I cut it.)
Note : So for the Aestetic, I used the face of Jax Teller from Sons Of Anarchy, and you have to know, even if Abraham Hale looks like him, he is totally an OC.
This is writen both in Reader and Dean’s Pov. Dean’s thought are in italic. 
Text divider by the talented @talesmaniac89​
Jay’s Masterlist
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September 16, 10:33pm
 Dean’s POV
           I always thought that when Y/n finds a guy, it would be the perfect douche I wanted for her. Some nice dude named Robert, a cop maybe, or a realtor with a friendly family.
           He would annoy me to death with his stories about growing up in a farm, and call her Pumpkin. He would worry a little when she goes out with us because he thinks we drink too much when we’re together.
           He would tear her from me and I would hate him for that. She would skip a hunt to meet his parents, another to spend a few days in the cabin he rented… But even if it breaks my heart, it would be exactly what I want for her, so I would let her go.
           I had it all planned.
           But, of course, she didn’t play by the rules.
           And that guy is no Robert…
           His loud manly laugh tears me from my thoughts. His tattooed hand wraps around his whiskey glass and I turn my head to that waitress that always gives me warm smiles, she’s staring at him now, with the sweetness that was once for me.
           Abe.
           Ex-gang member, Abe. Bad guy turned good. Raised by the widow of a gang member, in a violent environment, he already had a criminal record at fourteen, started selling guns before he was officially allowed to drink, ended up in prison at Twenty-two.
Sweet smile Abe. Reformed bad boy with an attitude. Became a hunter after he met a vampire gang and slew them to the last. Now defender of the good citizen, he found his fight, and the hunters talk about him as one of the bests.
Afraid of nothing and ready to fight, charismatic, alpha Abe. His muscular arm in the back of my girl, his long blond hair falling on his face when he lights up a cigarette in a grunt of content while she touches his neck.
Abe. My new nemesis.
“So Dean” he says with his deep voice hoarse from smoking too much. “How did you meet my girl ?”
I met her on a hunt, invited her to my room and took her on that wall. Do you remember, Y/n ? Don’t look down baby, look at me.
“On a hunt.”
“That’s how I met her too” he smiles and kisses her temple. “Seems like we have a lot in common.”
“Looks like we do” I state.
           Her eyes darken and she turns her head, I know how to read her, she is pissed, and I don’t even know why. I did nothing, I said nothing, and her rock-and-roll version of prince charming is worshiping her, so what causes that bitterness ?
What is it, baby ? Am I missing something ?
“So I heard your brother and you have this fucking palace ?” he gives me a corner smile, smoke coming out of his nose.
“Who told you that ?” I grunt.
What is the point of a secret bunker if it is as secret as a freaking tweet ?
           He chuckles and takes a sip of his whiskey, not answering.
           Abe never answers all the questions he is asked, maybe it is some cool thing for guys like him, maybe it is his way of look mysterious or powerful. What is sure is, as annoying as it is, it freaking works. But each time he smirks with his eyes lost in the bottom of his glass in a little huff instead of speaking, I get closer to losing it and smashing his pretty face on the table.
“I told him” she says almost coldly. “Like you did all your friends, Abe is my boyfriend, Dean.”
I nod. What can I say, she’s right after all. She’s always right…
           She was right about that cop being the bad guy the first time we hunted together, right about the fact that my so-called bond with Amara would fade the second she gets whatever she wanted. She was right about Jack being a good kid but dangerous enough to need to be watched and educated instead of pushed away. Right about Mary hurting me more than I admitted…
She was right when she said I was wrong. The day I told her we shouldn’t sleep together again, that she should just ignore that thing between us and jump in any guy’s arms. Any of them but me…
I really say that : any of them. I did.
Did you choose Abe just to annoy me, baby ? To prove a point ? You had to bring a guy who would beat me at my own grumpy-loner-badass-crap-drink-too-much game, right ?
“That place sounds sure awesome, because Y/n keeps coming back to it” he states, not letting me know the true meaning he puts in that sentence, his piercing blue eyes free of any emotions on the surface.
“Well it’s home for her” I say, and that bastard chuckles. “Is it funny ?”
“Not at all !” he says with a warm and kind laugh, and a friendly tap on my shoulder. “You should relax Dean, you look like the bar is full of demons !”
I stay stern, I know I should probably look friendly, but I rarely hated someone nice that much.
           He gets up and kisses her head before he walks away, his manly way to move catching women’s attention, and some men’s too. One of his hand goes through his blond hair while he walks to the bathroom with the other hand deep in his jeans’ pocket.
“So… Abe, huh ?” I ask, the second he’s gone.
           I should be more coherent, I know. I want her gone, but I want her for me. I was sure I was ready to see her with someone else, it’s been three years. Three years ! After we only made love six times. She is not mine, she never was.
And I thought calling her Baby in my head would make me strong. It’s a weird feeling, like I could let her be happy, but still feel special. I would have been the passion of her youth, the one that died young and of which she would think a little when she rocks her baby in her pretty house…
I had somehow romanticized my heartbreak.
But that doesn’t feel romantic at all. And all I can think of is that he is passion too, I’m not dead, and I just have to see him touch her and imagine them at night…
“Yes” she says, still with that bitterness in her voice. “You could make an effort, Dean. He has been nothing but nice, and you act like he’s an enemy.”
“I haven’t decided if he is one yet.”
She rolls her eyes and shakes her head in disapproval.
I recognize hurt. My Y/n, when she’s hurt, she gets angry. Always. And I made her angry so often. Her irritation is growing, I can see it in her burning eyes.
“You can’t do that” she says low. “You can’t treat him like that, no one gives you the right.”
“And him ?” I dare asking, staring at her reddened face. “Does he treat you right ?”
Her eyes fills with tears again and her jaw clenches.
“Better than you did, you mean ?” her words feel like a stab in my heart.
 Reader’s POV
           I didn’t want to say that, it came out by itself.
           I’m thin-skinned lately. I feel like I could cry or scream any moment, all the time. My emotions have always been loud, my sensibility overwhelming, but for a few weeks I’m drowning.
           The fact that I decided to try to get over Dean Winchester probably caused that.
A long time ago, I thought living with Dean without ever having him would be the worst, then I saw him with other women and was convinced I was mistaking before : the worst was definitely that. How wrong was I ?
           The worst is having had him. Not once, but several times, each time a little more intimate. More kisses, more touches, more suspended seconds watching in each other’s eyes… Until we spent that night together, that last night, and he fell asleep against me for the first time.
           It was over. It was too much for Dean, and not enough for me.
           Dean Winchester can’t belong to anyone, not again. He doesn’t want to be a boyfriend, and he doesn’t want me to be his girl ; who am I to insist ?
“Well, that’s a minimum” he answers in a soft groan after a little while, and my heart breaks because I just did what I swore I would never do : Reproach him for any of it.
“I’m sorry” I sigh, thinking of those weeks after the last night, when I had to hide the worst pain I ever felt because I didn’t want him to feel bad about not wanting me.
I still do... -feel that pain and try to hide- because Abe or not, I still live with Dean and he doesn’t deserve to carry my pain on top of the world on his shoulders.
“Can you at least try ?” I beg, low, seeing my boyfriend getting out of the restroom but stopping next to the door to talk to someone he obviously knows.
“Yes” Dean answers. “I’m just… He’s a hunter and…”
“He’s a good man” I assure him, looking at Abe walking toward us above Dean’s shoulder. “He comes from a dark place, like us, but he is a good man.”
 September 21, 08:12pm
 “That place is crazy !” Abe says, sitting at the table of the library. “I have never seen anything like this.”
           While Sam tells him a little more about the bunker, I look at my boyfriend.
           I stare at him, trying to get rid of that uncomfortable impression, that feeling screaming that he doesn’t belong here ; because if he doesn’t belong in the bunker, then he probably just has nothing to do in my life.
           A lot of memories cross my mind, like it happens a lot lately.
The memory of entering the bunker for the first time and deeply knowing that, as long as I am welcome here, this would be my home. Because it just feels right and because, even if I’m not the granddaughter of Henri Winchester, he trusted me with this place, as much as he trusted his family. That man actually welcomed me like Mary never really did, like I was just as legit as blood.
At his frank smile, the memory of meeting Abe crosses me too. I was alone in this hunter bar, trying to get information for a case. I hadn’t told Sam and Dean that I would go there, because I know how much uncomfortable the hunter community makes them. And I was introduced to him : Abraham Hale. I found him so beautiful, with his mischievous smile that seemed to mock the entire world, his wheat blond hair and his tattoos. Something felt so safe about him, not because he looked like a bad boy, but because he was light and happy, laughing at everything and taking nothing seriously… All that Dean wasn’t.
I loved his wild energy right away. Abe was like the drums in a rock song, like summer wind. In his arms, I forgot about Dean for a few seconds a day during the first weeks. We spent days sleeping and having sex behind the curtains of that motel room, hiding from summer heat, and nights drinking and listen to rock music...
But now I look at him, his bright blue eyes seem pale next to the deep green looking back, and his beauty is bland.
“Thank you for showing me your home, Treasure” he says, putting a tender hand on my back like he always does.
And my eyes cross Dean’s.
           I know what he’s thinking, he’s cringing at the nickname, and that reminds me why I am with Abe : Dean never gave me a nickname, he never called me anything else than my name, he will never and even when others do, he thinks it’s lame and cheesy.
 Dean’s POV
           That hurt on her face again.
Baby, you can’t look at me like that each time he calls you Treasure . I don’t like it, but you’re supposed to do.
           This is much harder than I thought, and I was aware it would be impossible.
           Each and every one of his actions makes me face my own contradictions : The more loving he is, the more I want to push him away from her. But the more she seems distant and to have her head in the clouds, the more it eases the pain. Am I selfish enough to hate her happiness even though I love her ?
           I was in control, during those three years not touching her, my heart was aching with craving and my soul was screaming at me to make her love me. But as much as the heartbreak was constant, I had chosen it. I was in control.
           I never realize that it was only bearable because she was still here, my partner, my best friend, my roommate. Mine.
           Now she took it back. She raised her middle finger right in my face and decided she wouldn’t be mine anymore.
And that is a whole new level of pain.
           I don’t sleep when she’s not home, and sometimes food just won’t let me eat it. She texts during our movie nights and wears that pendant he gave her. I hate that pendant because it reminds me I never gave her a present. Not once in all those years.
“Another drink ?” Y/n asks him with the bottle in her hand.
“Don’t you drive ?” I cut him before he answers and I see her eyes shoot me with imaginary bullets.
I’m sorry Baby but it’s movie night tonight, can’t he just leave already ?
“He’s right” she says giving me a little hope that she will ask him to leave soon. “You should stay for the night.”
My breathing gets stuck in my lungs.
No Baby, don’t do that to me. Please.
“With pleasure !” he smiles.
 September 21, 11:49pm
 Reader’s Pov
           He grabs my thigh to lift it a little and grunt in my ear. His kisses are hot on my neck, his heavy body moving cautiously on top of me.
           My eyes are on the ceiling, my hands on his sweaty muscular back and I wait.
           Damn, what is happening ? He’s close, I am going to fake it ? I swore I would never fake, I swore if the guy can’t get me there, he should know, but… Abe is not the problem, I am.
           I just watch the ceiling wondering what is wrong with me. He did everything right, nice foreplays and those love words he always has for me. But nothing seems to turn me on anymore, and without the need and the pleasure, his thrusts are just uncomfortable and I feel weird.
           Come already.
           I sigh. I know what is making this impossible. Dean. This fucker is the last I had in my own bed, the only one in fact. And everything reminds me that Abe is not Dean fucking Winchester !
“You okay Treasure ?” he pants in my ear, nibbling at it.
I’m not a freaking snack, what is it with his mouth and teeth always ?
“Yes” I fake a moan. “I’m close Abe, come.”
Just don’t be loud, that would be so awkward.
           When he loses rhythm, I close my eyes at the relief, it won’t be long now, make it stop. He shakes a little and grunt loud, filling the condom inside of me ; and, to make my fake moans credible, I clench my walls around him one time or two, rolling my eyes at his proud groan.
           Sex with Abe used to be so much more than this. I'm getting frustrated. Did I break something in me ? Why can't I enjoy anything anymore ?
           He rolls on my side, panting, and smiles tenderly at me. He’s beautiful, I have to admit that, and he’s nice and loving.
“You’re amazing” he hums. “I guess I can’t smoke in your bedroom ?”
“I don’t mind” I answer sincerely. “The air co is magical, just, don’t smoke more than one.”
           He sits on the bed to get his pants, his beautiful tattooed back on me. The smoke flies in pretty wreath. I put my hand on the lion tattooed on his back. It suits him, with his solar attitude and his confidence, his beautiful blond hair…
           Yet I keep longing for my wolf.
 Dean’s Pov
           Now I know I could kill him. And now I know what the limit amount of pain I can take is.
           I pace my room like a crazy man. He is taking her, my Baby. He is sinking inside of her and stealing pleasure. Does she wrap her legs around him like she always did with me ? To push me deeper. Is she as responsive ? As lost in pleasure as she was ? With that way only she has too beg for more with her entire body, voice strangled and arms caging me the best she can…
           Is she…
“F-fuck…” I whine, holding my heart.
I think I just felt it break.
Baby…
Breathing is painful now, I feel like I’m drowning.
Baby… Why did you have to do that to me ? I know I hurt you but your revenge is unbearable.
I sit on my bed, still holding my chest.
I can’t take it, you know.
“Shit” I grunt.
How can this kind of familiar panic attack be back ? How can this hurt so much ? It’s not Hell, it’s not Purgatory…
“It is Hell” I say out loud.
Loosing you, Baby. It’s Hell. Do you love him ? Because…
“Fuck, I love her” I whine.
 September 28, 06:05pm
             Sitting in my “Fortress of Deanitude”, I wait. The tray with snacks is there, beers too, and Netflix is ready for our next episode of Stanger Things.
           But there is a big chance she won’t come. Our movie nights are getting rarer and rarer, like our time together in general. And this place is slowly becoming a Fortress of Solitude…
           You never know how much you need something until you lost it, right ? I was stupid enough to think I could be stronger than the need for her and now look at me, alone in that big empty room in a bigger emptier bunker.
           All I can think of is how much each day pulls her closer to him and further from me. They are building memories in which I’m not, they are building an intimacy that I lost three years ago. She will forget me and he will have her, maybe even make her change a little, until one day she is among those people who talk about their personal tastes by saying “we”. “We prefer red wine”.
           Ew.
           Is he going to change my girl, for real ? Make her love Led Zeppelin a little less, make her a little less her, make her want other things, another life, need me less ? Our things will become unimportant and be replaced by all kind of other things I have no idea about.
           I take a long sip of my glass. It’s not like I had my word to say anyway. I lost her. I lost her in the worst way possible : willingly.
           But just when I’m about to get up and go put the snacks away, she opens the door, panting a little, like she had ran.
“Dean” she says entering the room. “I’m sorry. There was an accident on the road and the traffic was disturbed.”
You were at his place, Baby, and you ran to me ?
A little smile lights up my face when her presence revive my heart.
“It’s okay” I say.
“I’m late, but I have…” she takes her hand out of her purse. “Giant skittles !”
“You found them ?” I smile, sitting straighter when she hands me a bag.
Our things are not all gone. And she still cares about me and about our time together.
“Yup ! I made Abe stop in every shop yesterday.”
So you think of me when you’re with him, Baby ? Have you ever thought of me while he was inside of you ?
“Sit” I pat the armchair next to mine. “Let’s find out if Dusty’s girlfriend exists !”
“I really hope !” she exclaims, taking off her jacket.
I try not to look at her, but when she quickly takes off her jeans to slip in her pajamas pants, I swallow hard. Those thighs could have been for me, and I could have watched the show while holding her.
           She sits with her knees up against her chest in the big chair next to me, and takes a beer. My eyes are glued to her, looking for anything unusual, and fearing it more than anything in the same time.
“What ?” she calls me out of my thoughts.
“Nothing, I…” have no idea how to finish this sentence.
“I’m still okay you know ?” she says without looking at me, playing with the label of her beer bottle. “You always stare at me like something had happened to me. I know what you think of Abraham, but he doesn’t treat me bad.”
 Reader’s Pov
“I’m sorry” he sighs. “You know how protective I can get. Especially with you…”
A chuckle escapes me and I know he doesn’t like it, but protective with me ? He broke my heart. He ripped it and threw it on the floor because I had said those words.
“Yeah…” I nod, nibbling at my lip. “You won’t find bruises on me.”
He doesn’t answer.
           When did we become like this ?
           After a silence, he hands me candies and presses play. But, chewing on sugar and my eyes on the screen, I keep my full attention on him.
           I have everything any girl would want : A lover with hot blood, beauty and a heart of gold. But I'm not any girl, and the only thing I want is Dean Winchester. The genius who thinks he's dumb, the scared little boy who lost his mom, the leader, the victim of his fate, the killer, the loyal friend, the rebel, the torturer, the perfect brother, the wary hunter, the crappy dancer ; grumpy Dean, childish Dean, stubborn Dean, all of Dean...
           I look at him and my eyes travel down his neck, his beard is fighting to grow back there but I know he won't let it. The slow movements of his chest are mesmerizing. My eyes go down, to his thighs and crotch...
           I really shouldn't let myself look there but his smell and aura are like a mermaid song and I'm drowning. His strength is radiating of him and I feel myself respond to it in everyone of my heartbeats.
           He could make me scream. He always did, so easily. Dean made me cry of pleasure more than once, sometimes without any effort, the brushes of his fingers, the burning of his kisses... And when he finally buried himself inside of me, it was like a firework in Heaven. He never had to do anything really special...
           And now I wonder : Is something broken about me ? Abe is passionate and loving, we used to work great, he was easy as whiskey. And he loves me. Why am I unable to enjoy any of it lately ?
           My eyes trace the bump in Dean’s pants and I remember the simple ecstasy of feeling his cock twitch for me. Dean... I bite my lip to hold back the moan hanging on my tongue. His thigh moves a little, strong muscles hidden in his jeans, and I think of his stomach contracting that time he came on my tongue. I…
“I see you” his deep serious voice hits the air like thunder.
I look up to meet his eyes and realize I have been staring at his crotch, licking my lips and probably visibly holding back moans.
“Do you need something ?” he asks with a proud aura on his face.
I want to punch that expression off of his perfect features.
           I look down and sigh. Yes, I do. I need him, not only want like I would like to think, but need indeed. I need him to feel my body, to make it alive, and to hear my soul breathe again.
“Dean…” I just say.
Like it was an answer or reproach but of course, he hears it for what it is.
           A call.
           So he gets up, suddenly so tall that he eclipses the TV, the light and my will. He comes in front of me, standing there, making me look up timidly through my lashes. His strong hand lands cautiously on my cheek, gently holding my face while I lean on his touch.
           I can resist him. I can.
           I think of Abe's sweet smile, of his deep voice and his arms around me. I think of this night he told me about jail and I tried all I could to make him feel safe again, that was a beautiful moment... We are something beautiful Abe and me. We are going to make it right, to make it count. Right ?
           As my heart fights itself, playing all the love songs I know at once in my head in a deafening dim of emotions, my eyes fill with tears. I know what is going to happen, and the cruel god writing my story can stop there, the end is already obvious.
           I can't resist Dean. I just can't.
           And Abe will cry, right ? He trusts me. He will take his bag and yell maybe, the sun inside of him will get clouded, he will drive away. Then I will let my body slide on the door frame, unable to hold my weight up, because I will have broken the only man that ever truly loved me.
           I look down to hide the pain from Dean, but he knows me better.
"I can leave" he says.
But it's the last thing I want because I miss him, I miss him like a part of me died years ago and I still feel empty and cold... I miss him when I'm alone, and even more when I'm not.
           When he's about to move, take a step back to leave me alone, I grab his belt and hold him in place firmly. I have no plan, no solid thought, but I know I can't be away from him for now. He smells both like the most familiar home and the wildest dream.
           My other hand grazes the fabric of his jeans on his thigh, I close my eyes for a second and a little whimper escapes me. I started touching Dean less than a day after meeting him, and it seems I can't be around him without having my hands on his body.
           He hums, staring down at me, bow legs slightly parted like he needed balance, like he was gripping the floor for both of us. Dean had always been my anchor. His shoulders look wider from down here and I want nothing more than letting my hands grab his butt to rub my cheek on his crotch like a cat marking its territory.
"Touch me like you need it, Baby" he murmurs and a little sob escapes me unexpectedly.
He never ever called me Baby.
           He never gave me any nickname like he never gave me the place I thought I could take in his heart. And Abe, he calls me Treasure. He welcomed me in his heart...
"What's wrong ?" Dean asks like he didn't know.
Dean Winchester is the world's greatest hero, saved basically everyone's life without any reward, and for this he is a saint ; and still, he's the one that is going to be the end of me. Hero or not, he's my villain.
"Everything is wrong, Dean" I answer in a broken voice. "Everything."
He squats in front of me and my hand panics at losing my grip on his belt so it grasps his flannel like my life depends on it.
"Not everything" he whispers, bending to let his poisonous lips graze my skin.
My treacherous mouth opens in reflex at the proximity of his, making him respond by biting my lower lip. I whimper again and pull him closer.
"I got you" he states, letting his burning lips trace down my chin and my neck followed by his thumb, scratching my skin with his short nail. And I catch fire.
I let my head falls back and I surrender totally.
           That's how bad he is for me : I could let him break my heart again without an hesitation, after it took me years to recover just enough to just function. And oh, I will. I will shatter the heart of the man that trusts me just to let Dean selfishly remind me how much I love him.
           His breath is burning my skin, spreading in the fabric of my t-shirt when he buries his face on my chest, opening his mouth wide to pretend to bite my breast, hand cupping my sides like he had missed me for real. I let go of the plaid fabric to grip the short strand of his hair like I can.
"Dean..." the moan I have been holding comes out, filling the room with sin and the echo of future lies.
"I got you" he repeats.
His hungry hands seize my jeans and tear it open, fighting the metallic button's resistance brutally. The fabric hurts my lower back in a last resistance but is ripped off of me the second after, taking my panties in its way.
           And before I can sit straighter now that I'm on the edge of the chair, before I can talk, think or breath. Dean's anaconda arms grab my thighs firmly and his burning breath is on my folds.
"Wh-" I start but what can I say now.
He kisses my folds like no men ever did : like he was in love with that part of me. An open mouth kiss, tongue eagerly lapping my juice from my entrance to my clit.
"AH !" I scream, arching my back but Dean doesn't take a second to breathe, burying his face on me.
I squirm, licking my lips like I was kissing him back but the place he is devouring can only respond with throbs and getting soaked, which is does.
           I'm panting, I'm being eaten by the flames of that indescribable pleasure that is back. My stomach is shaking, my temples are beating so loud. I suck a breath when he sucks at my clit, moist hand gripping the leather of the chair.
"Dean" I moan again in the subdued light of the warm room.
He answers with a hum, and his nimble tongue pushes at my entrance, making my thighs shake violently in the vise grip of his arms.
           I can't escape what Dean does to me so I let go.
           My whole body falls backward when I come, harder than I have in years, holding his hair so tight it might hurt him, legs shaken by electricity, back arching and chest fighting itself to breath. My sensible clit seems to have nerves in my whole body and I fall silent, covered in sweat, suffocated by a forbidden crushing orgasm.
           I whimper desperately, limp and lost, panting in the chair like I didn't realize yet what just hit me. But Dean knows what he's doing, he knows where this goes.
           He opens his jeans, I can feel it even though I don't see him, my head still back, moaning at the caresses of his tongue on my neck. I bite my lip hard, hand moving from the arm of the chair to his, to feel his eagerness.
           And he grabs my thighs harshly, making me fall on the floor with him and holds my back when I can't, keeping me against him.
"So wrong..." I whisper in a dying echo of my disgrace.
His hand grasps my face firmly and makes me look at him. His eyes have this fire in them, he clenches his jaw when I roll my lips a little, wetting his craved cock on me, dying of being finally filled by him.
"Keep your eyes on me" he groans, grabbing his length to guide it at my throbbing entrance.
"Dean..." I moan, fingers reaching his stomach under his clothes to feel it tremble.
"Eyes on me baby" he repeats low.
 Dean's Pov
           She can't think of him. Not now. I need her with me, I need her for me.
Feel me, baby.
           I smile slightly when she dives her unfocused pupils in my eyes. She's perfect and I love her ; but I must say when she seems to surrender so completely to my touch, that's when forgot why I asked her to stay away.
           When I enter her, her phone lights up once again in her back, on the floor. I groan loud as she wraps me like only she can, like she was trying to suck me inside her core. She's shaking, she's fighting to keep her eyes on me and I'm fighting that urge to grab her phone and shatter it in a million pieces against the wall.
           She gasps, her body threatening to fall back so I hold her.
That's it baby, stay with me, feel me, let me take you like I used to when you were mine.
My hand fists her hair and my mouth gets attracted to her pulse point so I bend to suck at it, barely thrusting for now, just enjoying to be inside of her, feeling her pulsating with desire, the concrete hard floor digging in my knees.
           Her arms wrap around me, she cling to me and I try to ignore my jealousy shouting at me.
Baby, you try to ignore me but can he do that to you ? Can he turn you into a purring cat like that ?
"Dean" she moans, clenching around me, her thighs trying to get herself even closer so she takes me impossibly deeper.
"Say you want me" I murmur against her skin in a voice I barely recognize.
"I want you" she gives in, exhaling in my ear.
           Behind her, her phone lights up one more time with a text : "I found us a case in California, Treasure."
=> PART 2
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FEEDBACK IS GOLD
Tags : @parinarain @mogaruke @masterof-agony @rainflowermoon @tftumblin @deans-baby-momma @roonyxx @thefaithfulwriter @vicariouslythruspn @emeow1496 @daryldixonandfrogs @holylulusworld  @cocklesbelli @sandlee44 @screenchingartisancashbailiff @donnaintx @stormchasingchick32 @akshi8278 @magssteenkamp @sister-winchesters99 @neii3n  @lyss-dw79 @im-a-shrub @sadwaywardkid​@hopelesslydevotedtoyou1912 @slyqueenj​ @i-love-superhero​ @waywardsisterandpie @sunsetsandbooks​ @mrspeacem1nusone​ @stylesismyhubs​ @deanwanddamons​ @jawritter​ @peridottea91​ @chelsea072498 @chocolateheart​ @vicmc624​ @teresa-67​ @jessie-michael​ @doctor-hp-mcu​ @hawkerz12​ @mariaenchanted​ @hobby27​
699 notes · View notes
rowyn-writes · 4 years
Text
Star Struck (Castiel x Angel!Reader)
Warnings: Language, a splash of angst, a little bit of fluff, make out scene
Pairings: Castiel x Angel!Reader
Characters: Cas, Sam, Dean, Gabriel, Jack (mentioned only) Mary (mentioned only)
Word Count: 1.6k
Summary: When the Winchester's and Cas call on you for your help, Cas can't help but be star struck by your presence.
Requested by: @danitisx
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You roamed the streets Dublin, Ireland. Fascinated by the beautiful scenery and amazing culture.
"It's wonderful, isn't it?" A handsome man beside you asked.
"Indeed." You agreed. "Do you live around here?"
"Yeah, just up the road a couple of blocks. I've lived here my entire life. What about you? Where are you from?"
"Uh," You laughed as you scratched the back of your head. "I'm from the States. New York." You decided. It's not exactly like you could tell him you were an Archangel from Heaven.
"I'm Charlie, by the way." He gave you a cheeky grin.
"Y/N." You introduced yourself.
"Would you like to go out for a drink?"
"I would l-" You broke off as you felt a strange tug on your body. "Damn."
You were surrounded by a circle if Holy fire. You took in your surroundings. You seemed to be in some sort of emergency bunker. "What in Dad's name." You mumbled. "Alright, whoever summoned me here, if you don't show yourself, I'll smite you!" You growled, trying your best to be intimidating.
"Y/N." A soft voice said.
You whirled around to see a familiar angel. "Castiel." You breathed. "You're the one who summoned me here? Why?" You tilted your head to the side, similar to how Castiel would do whenever he was confused.
Two other familiar men emerged from around the corner. "Winchester's. Hello."
"Y/N. Good to see you again." Sam nodded.
"Ya know, if you wanted me here so badly, you could've called instead of summoning me here with a ring of holy fire. Which, by the way, is extremely uncomfortable."
"Sorry," Dean shrugged, throwing a glass of water, extinguishing the fire. "Precautionary measure."
"Fair enough." You slid off your black over coat and set it on the back of a chair. "So, what can I do for you boys? Do you need an elixir of some sort? An herb, perhaps? A spell?"
"They need some of your grace."
Your eyes darted from Castiel's over to him. You thought he was dead, long dead. This didn't make sense.
"You."
"Me." Gabriel smirked. "Hello, little sister. Long time no see."
"Yeah," You scoffed, raising your voice. "Long time no see because you dumbass got yourself killed by our brother! Or so I thought. Because to me, you look perfectly fine."
You trembled with anger. You had thought your brother was dead. You mourned him for so long. You cried for him, and there he was, alive and healthy. For now.
"Y/N-" He sighed.
"No! You don't get to talk, asshat!" You growled. "You let me believe you were dead for years! I cried for you, I prayed to you, to Dad! And there you are, fine and dandy."
Sam, Dean and Cas stepped back a little, giving you and your brother some space. Out of everyone, they understood family problems.
"You son of a bitch!" You screamed, using your powers to slam Gabriel into a wall. He gave out a small grunt as his back hit the cold brick wall. "You let me think you were dead! How could you?!" You clenched your fist, making it harder for Gabriel to breathe. "You were my best friend! My brother! And you heard how much pain I was in and decided to let me keep suffering! You insufferable dick!" Your eyes were glowing a bright blue.
"Y/N!" Castiel called your name, trying to calm you down. "Y/N! Stop." He rested a hand on your shoulder, squeezing lightly. "You need to calm down. Let Gabriel explain."
"You guys have ten minutes to explain everything that's going on before I get my ass out of here and never come back."
The men sat you down and explained everything that happened in your absence. Including your nephew.
"You're telling me Lucifer has a son?" You questioned. "Someone actually wanted to have sex with my brother?"
"Uh, well, Kelly thought that Lucifer was the President." Sam coughed.
"The Presid-" You cut yourself off. "Okay. . . Clearly I've missed a lot. So, you want me to give you some of my grace in order to get Jack and your mother back?"
"Yes." Dean nodded. "You're our only option left. Gabriel tried to help, but most of his grace was drained by Asmodeus and it'll take time to replenish."
"Fine. I'll help."
"Really?" Cas said hopefully. "You'll help us?"
"Of course." You gave him a gentle smile. "Jack is my nephew after all. He needs a female figure in his life. And I refuse to let him be corrupted by Lucifer. My brother won't have any contact with Jack if I can help it."
"Why do you care so much about Jack?" Dean asked, his eyebrows furrowed. "You've never met him."
"Doesn't mean I love him any less. He's family. And until recently, I thought everyone I loved was dead. So I can deal with the fatigue and snappiness that comes with losing some of my grace."
"Thank you." Cas said gratefully. "Thank you so much."
"Okay." You took a deep breath. "Could I get some help with extracting my grace? I'd do it myself, but I can be a bit squeamish." You looked over at the beautiful blue eyed man in a trench coat. "Would you help me?"
"Oh," Cas seemed to be flustered. "O-of course." 
You grabbed the tool and headed into an empty bedroom. "Okay, let's get this over with." You said, pushing your hair to one side of you shoulder to let Castiel extract your grace. "Just. . . Be gentle, okay?"
Cas nodded, still seeming unnerved. "You're scared. Why?"
"Well. . . You're one of the most powerful angels to ever walk the earth. You were one of God's favorites and most trusted. You led an entire army of angels into battle with demons. You banished the Princes of Hell back into Hell. You're amazing!"
You gave Cas a soft smile. "That's very sweet of you, Castiel. But I'm not the same angel anymore. I'm certainly not Father's favorite anymore. He was the one that cast me out of Heaven after he found out I had relations with a human. I'm not amazing. I'm ordinary."
"Well, you're extraordinary to me. You're helping us get Jack and Mary back. Even though you don't have to."
"It's the least I can do." You dismissed him with a wave of your hand. "You and the Winchester's have saved the world more than once. Granted, you almost ended it as well, but at least you fixed it. Plus, I can tell these people mean a lot to you."
"They do. They're my family."
"And I'm very happy that you've found your family, Castiel." You cupped his face in both of your hands. "You were a wonderful servant to Heaven, and an even better leader when the time came. You deserve to be happy after all the havoc that's happened to you." You pulled away, resting your hands in you lap.
"You would have been far better than I was. You are a good angel, and an amazing leader."
"I'm no better than Lucifer."
"Y/N," Castiel said in astonishment. "You are nothing compared to Lucifer. You are compassionate and kind. You care about people."
"But when the world was ending, I was off galavanting around the world. And when people were in danger and dying, I turned a blind eye and let it all happened!" You cried, tears rolling down your cheeks. "If I don't help, then I'm part of the problem, Castiel. I yelled at Gabriel for disappearing, but I did the exact same thing. I left, I left Heaven, my brother's, all of the other angels, I left them. For a jackass human that never really loved me. So you ask me why I'm doing this for you? I'm doing it because I've never done anything good in my existence. Ending that war with the demons, sure, it saved humans in the long run, but I never cared about that. I was just following Dad's orders. Like a good little soldier."
"Y/N," Cas began.
"Just. . . Take my grace. . . Please?"
Castiel frowned as he gingerly brushed your hair aside. "This might sting." He warned as he plunged the extractor into your neck. You winced, gripping your leg in order to cope with the pain. Cas ended up getting five vials filled with your grace.
"It should replenish eventually, but it might take some time."
You went to stand up, but immediately felt lightheaded. Cas came behind you, holding you up. You inhibitions were lowered when you lost grace, and this time was no exception.
"Has anyone ever told you you have the most beautiful eyes?" You smiled. "They're like the ocean."
Castiel's face tinted pink and he gave a sheepish grin. "Thank you, Y/N. You have very beautiful eyes as well."
"Is that the only thing you find attractive about me, Castiel?" You ran a finger along the length of his arm.
"I- Um. . ." The angel was flustered once again. "Well, o-of course there are other things attractive about you. You're gorgeous. Your lips are perfect, t-they look very soft."
"Why don't you find that out yourself." You smirked. You pulled Cas down by his tie, his lips meeting yours.
Castiel was hesitant at first, and you knew he never really understood kissing. You moved your lips against his, and he finally understood. You didn't even know you had been moving until your back hit the brick wall.
You hands got tangled in his dark hair, while his wrapped around your waist.
There was a loud bang at the door, making Cas pull away from you. "If you're done making out with my sister, we kind of need this show on the road." Gabriel called from the other side of the door.
"Cockblocker." You grumbled. "That was one hell of a kiss, Cas. We should do it again sometime." You gave him a wink as you headed back to the library.
"I need a cold shower."
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xxreader-writerxx · 3 years
Text
Study Buddy (Part 2 I guess)
Fred Weasley x Fem Reader
Warnings: Smut, NSFW, fingering, oral (female receiving), unprotected sex, exposition, and cursing.
Y/N= Your Name L/N= Your Last Name Y/H= Your House
You walk into where you and Fred usually meet, his dorm taking off your jacket still stressed from Hermione’s interrogation. You get shoved against the wall lightly, feeling his warm lips on yours. “Hi Freddie...” You giggle when he finally lets you go. “Hello darling...” He says while playing with your blouse buttons. “Woah woah woah… Where’s the work?” You ask, smiling goofily matching his smile and he moves over to show you his desk. You look at his papers which have close to chicken scratch writing all over it. He massages your hips standing behind you with his chin placed on your shoulder humming as he fights the urge to leave hickeys all over your neck.
“This problem is wrong.” You point out a few and he sighs. “Just the tie then? Or like halfway unbuttoned? Or cuddles?” He asks and you laugh nodding. “Fix the problems and we can cuddle.” You tell him and he nods turning faster than light to his papers. You watch as he bites his lip as he tries to correct them. He finally finishes and you nod smiling. “Perfect.” You tell him, kissing him quickly as you take off your shirt beneath his view. “What’s that for?” He asks, smiling. “You did finish your work. Just rewarding you.” You mumble going in for another kiss as you both lay down. As he wrapped his arms around you falling asleep quickly from his insane day of Quidditch you couldn’t help but remember how it all started.
---------------------------------------------------
I sit eating my favorite meal at the Gryffindor table laughing with my friends, Hermione, Ron, Harry, Lee, and Angelina. I’m in Lee and Angelina’s year but I never really made friends with anyone else in my year. Lee keeps trying to introduce me to the Weasley Twins every now and then but I either choke up last minute or get busy. The Weasley twins are the hottest people, and sadly the most troublesome, in our year. I can tell the two apart from a scar on Fred’s eyebrow but we’ve never truly met. I have classes with both but we haven’t talked. I’m the top of my year and I was always on time for class so me and them never really ran in the same circle. They rather prank and be wild. I love a good prank but I rather study.
I head to potions and the twins have already created havoc. The room was filled with a smoke and I realized it from the smell right away. I cover the bottom of my face with my sleeve running over to the cauldron which has a lot of already sleeping students next to it. I throw a lid on it and use a vacuuming spell to get rid of the leftover smoke quickly. I make a batch of the counter potion and put it in a spray bottle. I walk over to the first few students spraying it on them. I get to the end finally spraying the potion on Professor Snape. Everyone is awake and coughing. I go over to the culprits checking if they're ok. “Hi?” Fred says and I shush him checking for any lung harm. “That was dangerous.” I mumble and he nods rubbing his eyes. “George. George, wake up.” I say shaking the other twin. He pops his head up and looks at me quizzically. “H-How did you know who was who?” He asks, still groggy. “It's fairly obvious.” I mumble still in Healer Mode. “And who are you?” He asks as I move on to the next student. “Y/N L/N” I spit out and they nod. “I can handle this Y/N” Professor Snape instructs and I move so he can handle them.
“Now...” I say turning to the two boys. I slap their heads and they groan, rubbing their heads. “That was an idiotic thing to do. You are lucky I got here in time. If I didn’t that sleeping potion would make your lungs stop working and numbing your body. Let alone the others in the room. You better apologize and I will be writing to your mother.” I start to ramble but get cut off by Fred smirking. “You’re cute when you’re angry.” He says smiling and George nods. “Very kissable.” He agrees and I blush against my will. “Listen flattery won’t get you anywhere. Your mother Molly will be hearing of this.” I say and they whip their heads to see me. “Y-you know our mother?” George says now nervous. “Yes. I visit a lot you two are just too insane to notice.” I spit and they look at each other then me with their eyes squinted. “Oh my god- Y/N?! The no-boobs Y/N?! Well you certainly- Grew.” Fred says and I give him a death stare. “Sorry.” He mumbles and I nod.
I walk over to Snape and check his pulse and everything since he cannot do it himself. I nod curtly stepping away and he fixes his collar. “Good job Y/N/ 150 points to Y/H, 115 points from Gryffindor.” He reports and I nod going to my desk. Instead of my usual partner I get greeted by Fred who is smiling wildly. “Yes?” I ask and he shrugs. “I like this seat.” He explains and I nod.
We finish our class and Professor Snape calls me up. I walk over and he points at Fred. “He and George are falling behind. They have potential but waste their time doing pranks and jokes. Could you help Fred do work? I will give you extra credit. Me and his teachers think you and another girl are the best for the two. Top of your years of course.” He explains and I nod. “Yes sir. I will definitely get on that, no extra credit needed.” I say making him raise an eyebrow. “The joy of teaching of course.” I mumble and he nods questionably.
***
A few hours later I’m banging on Freds door. He opens the door only wearing sweats and I cover my face with papers. “Sorry. Thought you were my roommates.” He explains shyly grabbing a shirt off of the ground out of the millions of piles. I look around with my nose scrunched at the mess. “I always love getting that reaction. Helps the ego.” He says looking at the mess before him.
“Anyways...” I say and turn, giving him the books. “Read these. I have noticed your usual reading rate is around 160 pages per minute. But when you like the book it's 300. Try to meet me in the middle. I also noticed you dog ear pages. When you do that its bad for the book. Bookmark. Now what I think we will start off studying potions and finishing that workload. When you finish that we do transfiguration. Then some DADA homework. And-” I stop myself seeing him walk over to his bed reading a pranking magazine. “What are you doing?” I ask and he looks up at me. “Zonkos.” He points out showing me the magazine. “I know that… Why are you reading it?” I ask sitting down moving his legs. “Work.” I point out the books and he nods. “Read em all.” He explains. “What do you mean?” I ask and he laughs. “I read 'em. How do you think me and George make those potions? We know our shit, it's just the work we don’t bother doing.” He explains. I nod grabbing the magazine earning an upset groan. “How bout each workload you finish you get to read an article.” I propose and he groans getting up.
A few minutes later he’s finished and snatches the magazine from me grumpily. I smile reading the work. It's perfect. Some mistakes but it was only the hard stuff. I smile hugging him lightly and I back away quickly realizing I just hugged Fred Weasley. “Sorry.” We both say and chuckle. “Ok. Next piece of work.” I say and he groans, giving me the magazine. “This counts as slavery” He points out and I shake my head laughing. “I did want to say, your laugh is my favorite.” He says and I look at him confused. “Just because I didn’t remember you doesn’t mean I don’t notice you. You aren’t stuck up like most of the smart kids. I always liked that.” He tells me and I blush. “Just do your work you flirt.” I say blushing and he winks grabbing his quill. “Only flirt with the pretty ones.” He says and I blush more.
He finishes all his work after about two hours the whole time we joked around and laughed. I get up to leave but he stops me smiling. “Want to stay a little longer?” He asks and I kiss his cheek sweetly. “Gotta study myself.” I say and see he’s now blushing. “You studied this entire time.” He tells me and I laugh. “I have advanced classes, always gotta study.” I explain and he nods his smile only dropping a tiny bit. “Maybe later.” He says with a wink. I walk out blushing and sit next to Hermione who laughs at my state.
***Fred POV***
I walk over to Ron with George. We grab his collar from behind lifting him up and bringing him into a nearby storage closet as he yells. “WHAT THE BLOODY HELL!” He yells at us and we look at him annoyed. “OH GODRIC- MIONEEEE- L/N- SOMEONE BLOODY HELP ME THESE TWO ARE GOING TO HURT ME I KNOW THE LOOK!” He yells banging on the door. We grab his collar again earning a shriek. “CALM DOWN I JUST HAVE QUESTIONS ABOUT Y/N YOU TWIT!” I yell over his screams and he looks at me confused. “Y/N? What about her? She came over last christmas.” He explains and we look at each other slapping each other’s arm. “Why the hell do we not remember?!” We ask each other and he shrugs. “Fred was snogging some girl and George was drunk and high.” He explains and we look at each other annoyed.
“So what are your questions?” He asks and we nod. “We need the insider information. The pretty girl that he’s been drooling over is actually Y/N. She’s tutoring Freddie Boy and he’s got a crush.” George explains and I blush hitting his arm. “Do not.” I say and he scoffs.
“Do too.”
“Do not!”
“Do too!”
We start shoving each other and Ron stops us. “What the hell do you want to know?!” He asks and I nod. “Stuff like her favorite flower, favorite food, favorite everything.” He asks and I nod. “Well- She likes Blue Irises, but she’s allergic. Her second favorite is roses, she loves when guys know the meaning behind them too. I remember you read up on them so go with that. She doesn’t have a favorite food but if you want to be alone with her she’s always in the library after dinner. Tell her you wanted some extra study time or something.” He explains and we look at him skeptically. “Why are you telling us this?” I ask and he opens the door a little and points at a table in the Great Hall. “Malfoy’s making moves on her. I much rather Fred than him.” He explains. I watch as she giggles with Malfoy smiling besides her. “He’s probably just trying to use her. She’s hot as hell and smart too.” Ron admits and we nod.
“Well that isn’t happening.” I say and conjure a bouquet of light pink, peach, and coral roses. I walk over to her table and hold them up for her. She looks at them putting a hand to her chest. “Oh my god Fred what are these?” She asks, smiling and I smile back warmly. “I just wanted to say thank you for helping me with my school work.” I explain and she smells them smiling. “So the pink is for how sweet you are for helping me. Then the orange means appreciation because I really do appreciate it. And finally coral means friendship.” I say lying on the last part. She chuckles taking the coral one and smelling it. “Coral actually means desire but this was so sweet!” She says hugging me tightly. I smile at the short girl trying her best to wrap her arms around me and look at Malfoy as he sneers at me. “So Draco… As I said I’m now tutoring Fred, and have been for bout a week, so sadly I can’t tutor you. But maybe when his grades get up I’ll help with yours.” She explains and quickly kisses his cheek. I feel as if I just got a bludger to the chest and I keep my composure.
***Y/N’s POV**
I’m studying inside the library when I hear scuffling at the doors. I walk over to see Fred fighting Ron and George as they shove him into the library. I laugh quietly watching as they shove him inside. I can’t make out what they’re saying but they finally get him inside. They talk for a few seconds and Ron grabs his shoulders then slaps him a few times. He stands up nodding and they leave. He tries running out but they shove him back inside and I laugh a little louder. It gets his attention and he fights them harder making me feel a little upset. I walk over as he fights them and tap his shoulder. “If you’re afraid of me you can just say that.” I tell him and he looks down at me blushing. “N-no no no. I just don’t want to be studying but they’re forcing me.” He explains and I nod.
“Want to study with me? The library’s a little stuffy so I was just about to head to my dorm. If you’d like I would love it if you’d join me.” I ask shyly and he looks down at me smiling. “Well… Don’t want you to be lonely...” He says and I laugh holding my hand out. I drag him to my dorm sitting on my bed.
After some time of studying I catch myself looking up at him even though his back is turned to me he’s hypnotizing. I watch his strong arms move from one book to another or how he would lean his head back all the way. I rub my thighs together lightly as I try to take my mind off of it but I soon realize I have a mirror right in front of him. He spins around in his chair looking at me with a smirk. “Watcha doin?” He asks and I shrug acting innocent. He nods turning around chuckling.
***
A few days later I’m tutoring him in a classroom as he sits at the desk and he finally gets annoyed. He pushes all of his books on the ground getting my attention. I turn and see him walking up to me smiling flirtatiously. “I have been staring at your ass for way too long for that to be allowed.” He says and I blush furiously. “What?” I stutter and he grabs the side of my face kissing me. I give in to the kiss holding the back of his head and he slips his tongue past my lips. I moan lightly at this as he picks me up massaging my ass. He sets me on the desk when he finally retracts his head, placing his forehead to mine. “You have no idea how long I’ve wanted to do that.” He whispers out of breath. I kiss him again and feel his hands start to undo my polo. I place my hand on his chest and he looks at me worried. “W-we shouldn’t be doing this...” I mumble and he kisses me lightly. “We don’t have to, but I do think we totally should.” He says and I chuckle. I kiss him again and pull away stopping myself. “Godric why do you have to be so hot?” I ask and he shrugs smiling.
“What if...” He starts. He walks over to his desk and taps it. “Each piece of work done. One article of clothing. Then you're still doing your job and we still get to have fun.” He proposes and I chuckle shyly. He picks me up from the front desk placing me on his with my legs on either side. “Well?” He asks again and I bite my lip. “We would be breaking the rules...” I mumble and he laughs as if I said the funniest joke ever. “Like I care. Now. One piece for one piece of clothing?” He asks and I finally give in nodding. He kisses my thigh and I feel it go all the way to my core.
He rubs my thigh absent-mindedly as he works on the paper. He finally gets the first one done and hands it to me as he unbuttons the polo I have on. I check it and place it behind me. “First one done.” I say as if my shirt wasn’t off and he wasn’t eyeing my chest. “One kiss?” He asks and I laugh kissing him. He starts kissing down my neck and I finally stop him, handing him the next piece of work. He gets that done quicker than ever and tries taking off my bra but I stop him. “Underwear last.” I tell him and he nods, kissing my thigh again sending shivers through my entire body. He helps me shimmy off my skirt and throws it on the ground. “Godric you are beautiful.” He mumbles looking at me with a hunger I’ve never seen before.
He finishes another assignment at record speed. “Are you sure darling?” He asks before taking off my bra. “Please.” I mumble and he nods taking it off. He keeps his eyes on my chest making my cheeks turn pink. “Darling… You are gorgeous.” He tells me, kissing me roughly. He massages my chest making me moan. He drags my hips to fall into his lap as I feel contact with my aching clit and his trousers I moan louder into his mouth. “I know darling..” He mumbles as he moves to my chest sucking on my nipple and massaging the other. “Freddie...” I moan as he leaves hickeys on my chest. I remember the work and almost don’t care but making him wait would add so much more fun.
I give it to him sitting back in my place and he groans hitting his head on the desk lightly. “You are murdering me here.” He mumbles and I chuckle massaging his head lightly. He picks it up, moving his work back on the desk. Every now and then he’d glance at my chest smirking and working harder. He finishes the homework, giving it to me and I read it over slowly. He finally grabs it viciously and slamming it behind me, making me jump. “Darling please take off those horrible panties before I cut them off.” He tells me and I nod quickly. I shuffle them off and he flicks his wand to silence and lock the room.
He tugs my hips to the edge of the desk kissing my inner thigh. He moves to right above where I want him to be kissing it and I whine lightly. “Aw darling… Would you like me to lick your pretty cunt clean?” He asks and I nod furiously as he finally licks all the way from my entrance to my clit and lightly swirls his tongue around it making me moan. He starts eating me out (is it obvious I don’t know how to word it-) and rubbing my clit as I moan his name over and over again. He pulled away right before I was about to come, leaving me to let out a whiney moan. He kisses me lighty and pulls away chuckling. “Sorry I just can’t take the trousers right now.” He mumbles softly. He gets up taking his clothes off and I watch biting my nails lightly.
He kisses me finally and I stop him before he sits down. “I-I’ve never. Ya know...” I mumble and he kisses me. “We don’t have to if you don’t want to.” He tells me and I shake my head. “No I just want to warn you...” I explain and he kisses me softly. “You sure?” He asks and I nod, biting my lip. He sits down and moves me slowly on him. It hurts at first but Fred’s kisses helped me and the pain turned quickly into pleasure. I nod and start moving when he gives me the go-ahead. I feel his hands guide my waist as I go up and down against his dick. He chuckles, kissing me, moving one of my hands that are clutched to his shoulder to my stomach, smirking. “Feel that? I shouldn’t even fit” He chuckles and I nod kissing him roughly. I feel him massage my ass with one hand still guiding me with the other. He moans my name, moving his head back. I feel myself get close as he keeps moving me sucking on my chest. “Freddie ‘m gonna come.” I mumble and he nods kissing my shoulder. “Go on. I want to see your cum spill on my lap.” He mumbles and I nod, continuously going up and down.
I moan out his name loudly when I finally come all over his dick and he lightly praises me. I keep going until I feel him cum inside me and I fall into his arms exhausted. “So… Do I get out of tutoring now?” He jokes and I laugh lightly. “I will not succumb to your seduction.” I mumble and he laughs. I feel his chest rise and fall violently from laughter and I just hum in ecstasy.
We get dressed and he stops me blushing lightly. “Is this… an only one time thing?” He asks and I laugh. “If you think you will take my virginity and it being a one time thing I will hex your cute ass.” I tell him and he smiles pulling me in for a long kiss. We sit down facing each other and I grab my notebook. “Whatcha doin?” He asks and I click my pen. “We need rules” I tell him and he nods.
“Ok so You follow the school rules, I follow yours. You don't, you don't fuck me for a week per rule broken got it?” I ask caressing his cheek as he melts into it smiling goofily. “Yes ma’am...” He mumbles and I write it down. “Let's also make the clothing=work. Not all the time, just when I’m tutoring you.” I tell him and he nods happily. We continue making rules while he rubs my wrist lovingly.
---------------------------------------------------
I get snapped back to reality as Fred is giving me a light backrub to soothe the tension from Hermione’s questioning. “Right there darling...” I mumble and he moves a little to go to where I was pointing. “What were you thinking about?” He asks and I nod as he tries his best to massage my back. I smile at the question and rub his hand. “When we got together four months ago.” I mumble and he chuckles. “That was a many blow and hand jobs ago.” He jokes and I slap his hand laughing. “Can’t believe they still haven’t found out! Like should we tell them already?!” I ask and he laughs shaking his head. “It's funny watching them prod and wonder.” He tells me. I hear the door rattle and George mumble a spell. I jump to the floor and roll underneath his bed quickly. Should I make a part 3 where they get caught? So sorry if its bad
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sweetcheol · 4 years
Text
college boyfriend!wonwoo
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—genre: fluff
—au: college
—pairing: jeon wonwoo x reader
—song to listen to while reading: falling for u — seventeen
—word count: 2.9k words
—warning(s): mentions of sex, a bit of cursing. also i feel like this is a bit of a mess but so am i when thinking of wonu so
never, in your two years of university, had you actually met your best friend’s roommate
his name was wonwoo, and according to mingyu, he spent most of his time either in class or working as a waiter at a diner downtown
the only times he seemed to be home was either late at night, after you had either gone home or passed out on mingyu’s bed while he slept on the couch, or early in the morning, after you had gone to your own classes
which was weird considering how most of your days were either spent in class or in mingyu’s flat, as it was bigger and way more comfortable than your tiny dorm
you knew he existed, of course, because sometimes you’d come to find a hoodie of his lying on the couch
or a book neatly placed on the coffee table with a bookmark stuck somewhere past the middle
sometimes you’d even find a cup of half-drank coffee resting on the sink, a rarity considering just how neat mingyu’s roommate seemed to be
you’d seen him in pictures
he would be tagged in some instagram story drunk mingyu had posted when coming home from the club, the roommate rolling his eyes at the taller boy for making a mess as he entered the flat
or he would be smiling in a group picture taken at some birthday dinner with the rest of his and mingyu’s friends
and you had seen him in the portraits that hung in their living room; some of his and his family and some of his and his friends
and you had heard of him
oh boy had you heard of him
mingyu never really stopped bringing him up, blabbering about how wonwoo had accidentally opened the door to the bathroom while mingyu was showering (which was a big deal since mingyu had... broken the shower curtain a week before and still hadn’t gotten a replacement)
or talking about how he had almost choked on his soda after he was told his photos were selected to be exhibited at a showcase
and at that point, you were sure you were pretty much acquainted with him ... without even having said hello
but you had never actually seen him
and the first time you did, it was so rushed and chaotic, that it was almost as if you hadn’t (or at least, that’s what you would have wanted)
because you and your friends had gone out clubbing
and you had ended up drunk off your ass
which caused your roommate to call mingyu, the only person she could actually trust with your well-being in such a state, to pick you up because she was going off with someone for the night
and mingyu, being the loyal best friend he was, was left to deal with you and your nonsense
which included you practically screaming a very slurred “hey! you’re the roommate! dude, you’re cute!” to wonwoo as mingyu ushered you to his room
poor wonwoo was just coming out of his room when you had walked (kind-of) inside the flat, hair a mess with a big grin on your face (despite your now-ruined lipstick)
and it was a bit astounding at first
because wonwoo had never actually seen you either
he’d always thought it was weird, of course, because of the way mingyu always talked about you... he had always thought you two were pretty much a thing
it’s not like mingyu had ever spoken about you in that way, but the thought had planted itself in wonwoo’s head and now there was no way to shake it off
and the fact that he’d walked outside his room to find you and mingyu laughing and cooking breakfast together next morning didn’t help
because you had music playing and were lip syncing and smiling at each other
and wonwoo only whispered a quick “good morning” before he walked back inside his room with a glass of water in his hand
because well ... you were cute
but you were also with mingyu
and weirdly, after that night, the two of you started seeing each other almost everyday
turns out you shared not one, but two classes, and had not once noticed because you sat in opposite sides of the classroom
and you frequented the same coffee shop, almost always stopping by for your daily caffeine fix at the exact same time
and you were usually around the same spots in the library, faces way too deep in a book to ever notice the other
and well... you thought he was cute too
but he sort of, kind of, definitely avoided you whenever you saw him
he wasn’t rude or anything, but he’d never spend more than five minutes around you whenever you ran into him
not even when you laid in mingyu’s couch eating pizza and watching re-runs of your favorite dramas, because wonwoo basically chose to eat cold cereal alone in his room than to be around the two of you together
he was very observant, and in those few weeks, he had noticed you
like, really noticed you
and how you both enjoyed the same kind of books, drank your coffee exactly the same, listened to the same type of music and even had the same kind of humor
he noticed how similar you two were
he noticed how perfect you two went together
but you were with someone else already
except you noticed all of those things too
but once again, wonwoo avoided you like the plague
so that had to mean he didn’t like you, didn’t it?
it broke your heart when thinking about it
and you tried to ask mingyu but he was always like “nah, he doesn’t hate you. i think?”
so you were back to staring at him in class and hoping he wouldn’t turn around and catch you in the act
little did you know that you were slowly falling for each other
but being so similar, you tried your best not to think about the other
and as finals came around, it wasn’t that hard, because again, you both immersed yourselves in your academic lives so much it basically became your sole focus for that one period of time
until the boys went out to celebrate soonyoung’s a+ in his calculus test
and wonwoo saw mingyu make out with some girl in the middle of the dance floor
his hands balled into fists by his sides almost unconsciously, and he was 100% sure he would’ve gone and told mingyu off if only he wasn’t entrusted with dealing with a very drunk seungkwan, who was doing a very good job with keeping him occupied
because he kept trying to pick random sing offs with every single person his eyes fell on
and just because the rest of seungkwan’s roommates were equally drunk, he and jun had to spend the night at their place to make sure they were going to see the next day
but as soon as he went home the next morning and ran into a ... very shirtless mingyu, he went off
and boy did he go off
“how could you do that to (y/n)? do you even know how lucky you are? fuck, mingyu, you’re such an idiot. i swear, if you don’t go and apologize your ass off - no, actually don’t do that. you don’t deserve (y/n), you know? after what you did?”
and he just kept ... going
and poor mingyu was just staring at wonwoo as he blabbered whatever was on his mind at him and he was ??? so confused
“what the fuck are you even talking about?”
“i saw you! i saw you making out with that girl last night! and you brought her here, didn’t you?”
“well, yeah, but i-”
“see! that’s what i’m talking about! you cheated on (y/n) and go about it so casually, as if-”
“wait! cheated on (y/n)? wonwoo what the fuck?”
and mingyu ... he looks so lost that wonwoo would probably had just left if only he wasn’t so mad at him
because he was so, so, so head over heels for you
and the thought of you being hurt made his blood boil
“what does (y/n) have to do with this?”
“you’re their boyfriend! and you brought a girl home!”
“jesus fuck wonwoo, you got it all wrong! (y/n)’s my best friend! that’s it! we’re not dating, oh my god.”
and wonwoo was just ??? standing in the middle of the kitchen, face red, hands balled into fists and just about ready to swing at mingyu to defend your honor
and so it dawned upon mingyu. why would wonwoo even care? did you two even know each other?
“wait! do you like (y/n)?”
and wonwoo basically rolled his eyes at mingyu as he walked away and left the taller boy in the kitchen by himself
and well ... wonwoo didn’t know what to do
because he had tried to keep his feelings to himself for so long
and now they were basically fighting, with all their might, to come out
and he felt as if he was dreaming, or in some sort of daze, because before he could even realize, he was walking back into the kitchen and to a (still) very confused mingyu
“can you give me (y/n)’s number?”
mingyu nodded, still analyzing the situation, and handed him his phone with wonwoo’s yelling still buzzing in his ears
“i’m sorry, by the way”
and it must have been the remains of his sudden jolt of adrenaline, because his fingers were basically gliding over the keyboard as he texted you a sweet hi, it’s wonwoo. mingyu gave me your number, hope you don’t mind :)
you didn’t see the text until a little after when you woke up
because well... you’re so not a morning person
but when you looked up your phone you nearly passed out
because it was a text from wonwoo
your crush, who you could’ve sworn hated your guts before that morning
and you also had like 15 missed calls from mingyu and a very confusing text you didn’t even understand (something about him being scared? and demanding you to go to his apartment? in all caps?)
so you took a shower, got dressed (slightly more elegantly than you usually did when you hung out with mingyu) and went over to his flat
and to your surprise, it wasn’t mingyu who opened the door
it was wonwoo
he was smiling at you, and it was the most beautiful smile you’ve ever seen
but then you heard mingyu’s voice from the kitchen
“thank god, go somewhere else and sort out whatever it is that’s going on before wonwoo actually punches me in the face”
and you were really confused
but didn’t fight wonwoo when he took your hand in his and guided you away from the apartment and to your usual coffee shop for you to have breakfast together
he told you everything over a plate of warm croissants and two iced americanos
his cheeks were tinted pink and he’s smiling in embarrassment, but his voice didn’t falter
because talking to you felt natural, as if he had been doing it for a long time
and you feel the exact same way
so you didn’t say anything when he held your hand over the table as you both talked about how funny mingyu must’ve looked when wonwoo went off at him
his cheeks were tinted red the whole time
that doesn’t change as you start going out
because even when he’s your boyfriend, you so much look in his direction and his face is flushed red
talking about that, nobody knew the two of you were dating at first
except for your (now traumatized) best friend
so when the boys were hanging out at mingyu’s apartment and you came out of wonwoo’s room with you very flustered boyfriend walking behind you, everybody was like ???
and it didn’t help that mingyu saw the two of you and went “not when i’m around for gods sake”
the boys looked so confused when wonwoo was like “oh, we’re dating”
because some of them knew you
“wait so... mingyu’s best friend... and his roomate...” followed by a giggle from the one and only yoon jeonghan
and a very loud whine from mingyu hehe
the tall puppy you call your best friend lays off it a few days afterwards
he’s still a little scared of wonwoo but it’s okay to him, because your boyfriend often uses it to his advantage
like the the time the two of you were cuddling on the couch, each with a book of your own, and mingyu kept going on and on about how the three of you should go out for some ice cream
and wonwoo stared at him like he did that one morning
“you know what? maybe jihoon wants to go get ice cream, enjoy the rest of your day”
but anyways
your relationship with wonwoo is really, really, really domestic
like the two of you spend way more time just cooking together and having deep-ass conversations in his bed while cuddling than anything else
one of your favorite things to do is laze around in sweatpants and hoodies while reading and listening to music
because if you basically lived in wonwoo’s apartment as mingyu’s best friend, you spend even more time there now that wonwoo’s your bf
he even cleared out one of his drawers for you because you kept on leaving clothes there every time you spent the night
mingyu even added you to the “neighbors!” chat after declaring you their unofficial third roommate lol 
you also go on plenty coffee dates
especially before class
and then when you get to your shared classes, hand in hand, people are like ??? were they dating ??? but don’t dwell on it too much bc you two do go along like two peas in a pod
study dates in which you two DO study but also have a great time
because you’re listening to music and helping each other revise over some snacks
talking about music, he’s always making you playlists
he’d literally be listening to any song and think of you, so he’d have like 15 playlists full of songs that “sound like you”, as he says
you’re always cracking jokes around the other
and people don’t get it sometimes
but you always do
so when you’re around the guys and woo cracks a joke that no one laughs at but you, he feels rather happy?
i mean he’s always like 🥰🥰🥰 anyways so
boy dresses so comfortably
that if you ever get to wear something of his, you’d be in heaven
he’s pretty tall ? and broad ? so his clothes fit you so so comfortably
and he gets super shy whenever you do but it also makes him so happy
especially if someone else notices
like if you go out late for dinner with him and gyu and wear something of his and mingyu goes like “isn’t that wonwoo’s hoodie?”, boy goes like 🥰🥰🥰 once more
i feel like the two of you don’t necessarily flaunt your relationship
since he’s pretty shy i don’t think he’d be into pda
but you’re always super close to each other
and if he feels comfortable enough, he’d hold your hand or put his arm around your shoulders
if you ever go on a night out together though
oh boy hehe
prepare for wonwoo’s hands to be on you at all times
especially when you’re both a little tipsy and in the middle of the dance floor
all of the guys would look be low-key scared at how close wonwoo and you are grinding dancing, completely lost in the music (and each other)
because it’s so much closer than what they’d ever imagine coming from the two of you
which prompted mingyu to be super awkward around you two for the following days hehe
talking about that, mingyu basically flees the apartment he hears even the faintest noise coming out of wonwoo’s bedroom
and idk i feel like, opposite to his usually quiet nature, he’d be pretty vocal in bed
super into dirty talk don’t even fight me on this
it’s more like super amped praising than actual dirty talk but still
loves it when you ride his thigh
loves it when you ride him in general
idk i feel like the two of you would have a sex playlist
and the songs on there are suuuuuper sensual
so it’s not like you’re going at it wildly but it’s... really intimate and ~spicy~
super into holding hands and kissing you so damn hard as he gets close
he once tried to give you a strip-tease but went super shy right in the middle of it and you never spoke of it again lmao
i feel like wonwoo would be a super romantic lover
not the type of romantic that recites poems and buys you flowers every day or anything
but the way he kisses you when there’s nobody else around, and you feel like it’s only the two of you in the whole world
and the way he looks at you, with so much love and adoration it almost makes you cry
and the way he holds you at night, so close to him you can literally listen to his heartbeat 
and the way he opens up to you when you’re alone in his apartment and goes “i just... i never thought a love like this would even be real, you know?" 
he literally never gets enough of you
but it’s okay, because you don’t either
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rikiflowers · 4 years
Text
being enough; levi
genre: angst and fluff
warnings: cursing 
- 3.6k words; Levi Ackerman x female reader; college au  
you just want to be with him
You were tired. Not only were you sleep deprived for-you don’t actually how long- ages, also your mental health wasn’t in a stable place. Your constant fear to fail in every area of your life, does the rest. You were so tired, that you only lay in your bed, your eyes kept staring on the ceiling. It was pitch black in your room; your head sunk into your many stuffed animals. You were glad that your roommate was never here. She snucks out to her boyfriend’s place, so you could be for yourself. You sigh, hearing loud banging and bass boosting music from 2 rooms next to you.
 It was always like this, so you got used to it, but today was an exception. Anger bubbles in your body. Couldn’t they be doing drugs and loud music at some other time, when you’re not like this? The void seems to consume you and you wished you could fill it; with him. You knew it was just sex, but your heart yearns for more, than he could ever give you. But you got along with this, feeling your body getting number with every shared kiss, every thrust and every intimate moment, which isn’t real.
You flinch as you heard your door open. For a second you thought your roommate was there but as soon as you hear his voice, your heart begins to flutter. “Why’s so dark in here are you vampire?”. He states, without a sign of a joke, but you knew it was. You don’t reply, instead you just lay there. You forgot he was coming to your place.
“You dead?”, he snaps at you, while he makes room for himself on your bed. I wish, you wanted to say, but instead you sit up, loop your arms around him. You buried yourself in his defined chest, feel his heartbeat through his hoodie. “What’s up?”, he asks confused, because he never seen you like this, and you could tell he’s a little overwhelmed with the whole situation. His hands grab your arm, pushing you just a lightly away.
 “Will you fucking tell me what’s up or should I guess?”, he groans annoyed and his tone, you’re normally used to, scatter salt in your open wounds. Right now, you were too sensitive, everything you want is just smelling his scent that calms you down, usually. Right now, you can’t find the peace you desperately looking for.
“Fuck you.”, you mumble, avoiding his eyes. He only scoffed. “I came here to have a little stress relief and now you’re the one making a fuss huh.”, he coldly says, and it hurts. You fucking know. You both are just parties who fuck, nothing more. You fling his hand away. “Go.”. You didn’t want to say this.
He stands up, without a word and you’re hurt. You want to scream at him, tell him how you want- What do you want?
“Text me when you’re not being a brat.”, he adds and you’re about to throw him out of the window. The door shuts loudly, making you realize what just happened. In a blink of an eye, you frighten away the only one you wanted to keep. You kept staring at the door, hoping he would come back, but his wouldn’t happen. You and Levi were just fuck buddies. Noting more nothing less. It was a secret, you told nobody. Not even your shared circle of friends. You were professionals to keep it a secret.
You realize how you fucked up. What did you expect? That he would graze through your hair, kiss your problems away? You didn’t even want it yourself so why were you so desperate for this kind of affection? Levi wasn’t this kind of person, so were you. That’s why it was never complicated; Until now. Until feelings got in the way.
You curse under your breath, keeping the damn tears, not worth of escaping. You ask yourself what just happened.
 …
“I’m fucked.”
Hanji lets out a frustrated sound, their head banging loudly in the table. You’re petting your friend’s head and Erwin lets out a low chuckle. “How often did I tell you to study for this test?”. Hanji growls and you and Erwin exchange gazes. You stretch out your arm, snapping his holy chocolate drink away from him. “Hey, that’s mine?”. You only grin at him, open his favourite drink and taking a delicious sip. “That’s for being a bigmouth.”, you only say and he only scoffs, but gifts you a cheeky smile hat says, ‘payback is bitch’.
“Hanji, let’s study next time okay? If you pass, I’ll give you 10 packs of your favourite gummy bears- “. You couldn’t finish speaking, because Hanji suddenly clings on you, like you’re their personal saviour, robbing the air out of your throat. “How could I deserve a best friend like you?”, they cried out, the whole canteen was looking at you. “Shithead, they’re looking at you.”
A new voice appears. It was Levi and your mind went automatically blank. After the last not so well proceeded meeting, you didn’t speak to each other. A whole weekend has passed, and you weren’t sure how to act. How did you act before? Why was this so hard now?
“Shorty shut up.”, Hanji spats cheekily, while the man only scoffs, takes his seat next to Erwin. You stare onto your plate, not sure what you’re doing, but you felt his eyes for a split second on you, covered under the attention of your friends. You felt your cheeks burning. Damn your body kindly betrays you.
You felt a rough hand on the back of your hand. You knew it was Erwin’s. “Everything’s alright?”, he only whispers, unheard for the others. You look at him, gave him a reassuring smile, that says ‘don’t worry’
You felt his blue eyes bore into you. He doesn’t believe you, while should he? He knows you better than everyone and yet you lie to him, without missing a second. While you two are having a silent argument, the other two doing their duty to insult themselves. They’re friends, actually, even when it doesn’t look like this. What you don’t register are Levi’s glimpses he gave you. He doesn’t want to admit, but his mind found itself at he thought of you and Erwin and he doesn’t like it. You’re not acting like yourself and he secretly wants to know the reasons behind it; But he’s too afraid to ask.
“You want to meet up at the library for the next assignment?”, Erwin asks you and you gladly go along. Studying with Erwin was always calm, organized and precise. You did actually get work done (different with Hanji).
“When?”
“After today’s class and after our study session I treat you your favourite pizza.”. You smile. “I love you; you know that?”, you let out, wanting to smooth your best friend right now. “Hey, what’s with the lovey dovey?”. Hanji speaks up and you only cringe. “What the fuck?”, you’re letting out and nearly fell from your seat. Hanji and you laugh so loud, that you were entertaining the whole area, but it doesn’t matter.
“Erwin did you hear this?”, you choked out, between your laughs that are actually looking painful, because of your tears escaping your eyes. He heard and Levi did too. Suddenly the raven-haired stands up and leaves, without looking at you. You were instantly quiet, followed with your eyes the disappearance of him. It prickles in your chest, because you promptly thought you did something wrong. “Huh, what’s with him?”, Hanji asks, instead of you. Erwin only shrugs. “He didn’t tell me.”, he only adds, leaving no room for more discussion.
You had the sudden urge to follow him; But you knew it was out of question. Levi wanted it to be a secret between you two. You aren’t even sure if this what is between is still there. Being anxious wasn’t even a term. You decided to text him after your study session with Erwin, hoping he would reply.
 ….
Why couldn’t you be so focused like Erwin who looks like the god himself, studying with no break and then he explains everything so nicely to you? How is he even real? Your head feels so heavy, lying on your arm, while Erwin buried himself in the books before him. 
You smiled, while looking at him. Sometimes there was a little voice in your head, asking why you couldn’t have developed feelings for him? He was perfect in every aspect, he cares, and you knew he had a crush for you long time ago. You loved the silence, and the library was the perfect place for it. Just very few students gather in these halls.
“You’re sleepy, y/n.”, the blond states, earns a mumbling from you. “no, I’m studying.”, you answer, and you hear him chuckle. He ruffles trough your hair, ignoring your pouting, while his finger slightly massaging your scalp. “I don’t know drooling on the books is supposed to be studying.”. Instantly you’re straightening your back and wipe the evidence away. “I’ll grab some coffee and then I’m fit for use. You want some too?”, you ask him, while standing up. He waves and you’re making your way.
You hate that you can’t think straight. The situation with Levi nibbles on your nerves and you couldn’t handle these feelings well, already feeling unease in your stomach. You head out of the library, to go to the vending machines, standing some meters away on the side of the library complex. The sun was slowly setting, and you paused for a while. It was nearly 4 pm and the glow was nearly perfect. The sun feels so nice on your skin that you’re nearly drowning in this moment, completely forgetting your environment.
“Oi.”. You snap out of your daydreaming and the first thing you see was him. Levi, who looks like he actually wants to murder you. It wasn’t his normal stern face; he doesn’t seem in the mood at all. “Hi?”, you reply, feeling already giddy. It was his effect on you. You were already on your knees.
“You could at least tell me your feelings before you fucked with me.”
Your eyes wide, unable to process his statement. “Huh?”, was everything that left your lips and he just scoffed. His expression changes. He looks just dead annoyed and kind of arrogant. “Don’t play with me.”.
You didn’t know what he means. “Levi, I don’t get what you mean?”, you seriously tell him, and you feel how you feel your body tremble.
“Oh, you don’t know that you and Erwin have something going on I was just a side thing?”. He finally speaks and you couldn’t believe what he just said.
“I am fucking right and now go to him, he’s waiting.”. Levi turns around, but you were quicker. Ignoring his hateful gaze, that bores into you, you’re blocking his way. Your palms lie on his chest, feeling his rapid heartbeat. “you’re an idiot, Levi.”.
“now you’re calling me names. How low.”, he snarls at you, took your hands and threw them away from you. You were a little taken back from his sudden action. “I don’t have anything going on with Erwin. I never had. If you had listened to me, you would know that it was you.”, you finally breathed out, what you always wanted to say; But too scared to do.
“always you.”, you added this in the storm of your feelings. For a bliss you looked into Levi’s grey eyes and then you ran back into the library, leaving him there. Levi is just standing there, in the middle of nothing and totally dumbfounded. He couldn’t handle what you just said. Why did you run away? Levi’s body tell him, to chase you, to ask you if this was true. He really wants to know, but instead of doing so, his body freezes, unable to reach out to you.
Why did he come here in the first place? He assumed that you had feelings for the blond. He watched him, slowly grazing through your hair and he was about to break every knuckle of Erwin’s hand. He had no entitlement to be actually jealous, but he couldn’t stop. He just saw you as someone who’s only there for him. It was out of question for him. He didn’t even have someone beside you. So, when he felt that you’re not like yourself anymore, your eyes miss the sparkle, every time you two are together, he was sure that you liked someone; Not him.
And here you were, telling him with your whole chest, that you like him? Him? Out of all the people that admire you? Levi wouldn’t commit to it loudly, but something in his brain always told him, that he didn’t deserve you at all, not you. When both of you made out at the party month ago, Levi couldn’t believe, that it’s really happened. He was on the constant brink, he could wake up and you’re not laying next to him, your warm skin brushing against his cold one. Now his nightmares were real. He fucked up. He fucked up so bad. You were bare before him, shouting your feelings at him and on the other hand Levi was too scared, too coward to admit.
You were running into the library. You didn’t know where else to go. You just want to leave the scene and him. Erwin instantly notices. His head peaks up, while you try to remain calm; But you couldn’t foul your best friend. He didn’t need to ask where your coffee is or why you had taken so long- He knew. “Let’s get out here, common.”. 
Erwin was a pure angel. You couldn’t speak. Every try you would take; your tears would flow. He grabs your bag, insisting to carry it, while you’re looking like a lost sheep. The blond lead you out of the building and you’re hoping, Levi wouldn’t be there.
You can’t even bring yourself to look around, your eyes are fixed on the ground. “He isn’t here, y/n.”, he reassured you and you could finally breathe. “Erwin, I- “. Instantly tears escaping your eyes and you begin to sob uncontrollably, not finishing your sentence.
“I knew.”, he starts, and you look up to him. You could tell he was disappointed. “I thought you or Levi would tell me, so I waited.”. He sighs, ruffling through your hair, like he always does, and it soothes you a little. “We aren’t in a relationship, I doubt there would be something after this.”, you spoke, feeling your whole body tremble.
“After what?”.
“I confessed my feelings to him, I shouted them, and I ran.”, you answer, and you see Erwin’s little smile, creeping on his lips. “Huh?”
“Why you’re smiling like that?”, you add, waiting for an answer. “You two are unbearable. Thinking we wouldn’t sense something. You two really thought, we were that dense.”
“Hanji too?”. A chuckle was his answer and now you were dumfounded. It was so obvious for them and they kept quiet the whole time? “I hate you both.”, you spat at him with reddened eyes. “We love you too.”. You shove him playfully away, earning a laugh. “I can’t believe you.”, you shout annoyingly. “It’s so damn embarrassing.”
“I found it quite entertaining.”. You punch him. “Anyways it’s over now.”, you breathed out, feeling the tight knot in your heart. “I don’t think so and you know that.”, he interferes. You couldn’t reply to him. You don’t want it to be over. There was this huge misunderstanding between you two, that needs to be solved. He was never a side whatsoever. He was always your first priority, while you were questioning him; To think he thought the same, was draining; to say at least.
“We’ll see.”, was the last thing you would say for now. “I heard you’ll invite me to pizza.”, you changed the topic and Erwin kindly goes along. “I don’t know, when I ever said that.”. Whines left your lips, because he would now play with you. “I have receipts you said that!”, you pout, and he just laughs, leaving the university complex with you.
You knew he would treat you pizza.
….
It was exhausting, draining and everything that is sucking out every last energy you have. Avoiding Levi. It wasn’t your best move, but you didn’t know how to face the older one. Even if you see him in a distance, his raven hair peaks through other people, you ran away. Even Hanji couldn’t believe you two, calling you “lovesick teenager”. You punched them, every time.
Erwin was still around Levi and you were glad he does. They were also friends and you don’t want them to separate, just because you couldn’t talk this out.
“I’m so bad.”, you mumble, with your face buried in your arms. Hanji chuckles. “Looks familiar.”. You groan, wanting nothing more than a good portion of sleep; Forever. “y/n, it isn’t so bad, you can compensate this mark with…”, you don’t listen to them, because it wasn’t just the bad mark that’s on your mind. Your heart aches and it gets stronger, each time you refuse to gain some bravery to speak to him.
“I just wan to see his face…”, you whisper, and you expect Hanji to laugh at you, telling you to ‘just-go-see-him-it-isn’t-that-hard’, but instead there was silence.
“Then why you’re running away from me, woman.”
The first reaction to his voice, was to say ‘fuck’ and you heard Hanji laugh. Fuck. Why was he here, right in front of you and all the others who are watching? Your heart seems to jump out of your chest, while you’re desperately trying to find a way out.
“please go.”, you whisper, not facing him, because your face was red like fire. “No.”, he simply says, and you finally raise your gaze. He stands right before your desk, looking down on you and you feel yourself instantly drawn to him. You hated his effect on you.
“Everyone is watching, you don’t like that.”, you spat, harsher than you want. Why couldn’t you just think straight for once? Levi only scoffs, his hoodie hanging loose on his defined body. “Stop this bullshit y/n and please let us talk.”. Who was he to call this? Why were you so in a mess, that you see his behaviour as provocative?
“I- “. You don’t know anymore. Maybe it was your pride speaking, not yourself. Everything in you was burning, not knowing how to handle the situation well. His eyes soften, ignoring the staring gazes of the others in the lecture hall. “Please.”. The soft and kind of desperate tone in his voice shift something in you. “When?”.
“Now? I heard it was your last lecture.”. You couldn’t decline. You just couldn’t; So, you only nod, excuse yourself from Hanji, who only smiles. You ignore the others, following the man, you’re so deeply in love with, outside. What should you say after your confession?
“Are you free to grab a tea?”, he quietly asks, while you two are heading out of the building. You just nod, having trouble to find the right words.
It was empty on the floor, only your footsteps could be heard. “y/n?”, he breaks the silence and you looked at him. “Can’t you please say something? I- I ‘m not used to you not talking.”, he demands and both halt. Your eyes bore into his. “and I’m not used to this.”, you reply, mentioning his different behaviour.
The mood was tearing. “I know.”.
“but I want to apologize for being such an ass, accusing you of something, just because I couldn’t face my own insecurity of not being good enough for you.”, he breathes out, while his eyes are focused on something else, not looking at you. You could this was difficult for him. His ears were red, not hidden form his silky, black hair.
“Why in the world could you think something like this?”, was the first thing that left your lips. Levi, the most wanted man on the campus was afraid of not being good enough for someone like you? You could only imagine how deep his insecurities root and a part in you always want to discover them.
“The evening, when you left… I was desperate to have you. I just wanted you to hold me, to tell me you’re here and you left.”, you came clean and he looks ropey. It makes your heart ache so much, that you just want to hold him.
“I was anxious, that you want to end things. I misread and I am sorry.”. You sense that he was really sorry. He confesses his feelings out here, not caring for someone to overhear it. “Thank you.”.
Your answer surprises him and you see him searching for words. “I should thank you, y/n. For loving someone like me.”.
That gave you the rest. You instantly found yourself into him. His arms wrap around your frame, drowning you into his scent, you were missing so much. You take a longs exhale, feeling his racing heartbeat against your ear. “you are an idiot.”, you muffle against his hoodie, feeling tears prickling again. He chuckles low, kissing your scalp softly, while his finger grazes over your back. This was more than you could ever ask for. Just him.
“I’m trying y/n okay?”.
You only nod against his chest, squeezing into him more, until you become one. There was more to talk about, but that’s for later.
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xbaepsae · 4 years
Text
it’s complicated (m)
“You are long past the point of no return. The rational part of you is screaming that this is a terrible idea, that this is bound to ruin your friendship with Tae. But you can’t find it in yourself to really care. You want him, so badly you are about to burst.”
[taehyung x reader]
genre: friends with benefits!au, eventual friends to lovers!au, a lot of angst, smut
word count: 14.4k
rating: mature
warnings: loss of virginity, toxic relationship, confused/frustrated characters, unprotected sex (10/10 don’t recommend), oral, creampie, language, mentions of alcohol
a/n: this is a reupload! i honestly wasn’t going to post this fic again, because i have so many other new ideas i want to write about, but i reread this the other day and it’s actually so good?? lol. i wrote it so long ago, but wowowow i still felt the angst in my soul. also, fyi, like all of my reuploads, i’ve changed a few things (not the overall plot tho). xoxo
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It all began in tenth grade English class.
At first, Kim Taehyung seems any other kid in your class—perhaps, a little loud at times but still just a boy. But that was just until you were partnered with him on a project. Least to say, you two became fast friends once you realized how funny the guy was. He could bring a smile to your face no matter the circumstances.
This friendship between you two blossomed quickly; but soon, there’s a slight shift in the air around you both.
“Y/n,” Taehyung says your name, sprawled on your bed with you.
It’s summertime, which means days seem to drag on and on. This also means that you two have nothing better to do, choosing to lazily lounge around each other’s houses. Your parents are never home anyway since they worked, so having Tae’s company is always greatly appreciated.
But despite the lackluster summer, school starts in a few weeks and the thought is bittersweet. You are happy to be occupied again, but also sad since going back to school means you no longer get to spend so much time with Taehyung. Although you both became close at school, that doesn’t mean you’ll always get to be around each other there.
“What?” you ask, turning to look at him.
“So, this might sound a little weird…but…” he trails off. “Fuck. I can’t; it’s too weird.”
You turn so you’re lying on your side, “What is it, Tae? We’re friends, right? You can tell me anything.”
Taehyung glances at you, clearly struggling with himself.
“I-I…can I kiss you?” he asks the question so fast you think maybe you just imagined it. But when you notice that his face is beat red, you realize that you did hear him right. This causes you to flush as well, a weird sensation beginning to bubble through your body.
“Where is this coming from?” you manage to ask him.
“I don’t know,” Tae admits with a shrug.
You find yourself shifting awkwardly on the bed as silence starts to fill the room. What are you supposed to say? Taehyung is your friend; you enjoy being around him and he makes you smile. But he wants to kiss you…what is that even supposed to mean?
“You know what?” he suddenly breaks the ice. “Forget I even said—”
“Okay,” you cut him off fast, not even fully registering what you say.
Taehyung snaps his head to you, mouth dropping, “What?”
“I said okay—you, I mean, we can kiss.”
You say all of this relatively calm, despite the fact that you feel like your whole body is on fire. Tae stares into your eyes, seemingly searching for something. “Are you serious?”
“Yeah,” you gulp nervously. “I mean, this is just for fun, right?”
Something passes over Taehyung’s eyes, but you don’t catch it fast enough. The emotion fades away and you can only assume it didn’t mean anything.
“Yeah…fun,” he says, licking his bottom lip.  
Unintentionally, your eyes travel down to his plump lips and you can’t seem to look away. Has he always had such nice lips? You find yourself asking all these questions that you don’t even notice how close Tae has gotten to you, merely inches away. His breath gently fans across your face and the reality of the situation hits you. This is going to be your first kiss…ever. And to say you are freaking out would be an understatement. It’s not that you so much oppose the idea of kissing, you just haven’t met the right guy.  
Looking into the eyes of your friend, you feel warmth flood your cheeks. “Tae…”
He blinks, “Yes?”
“Have you ever kissed someone?” The question rolls off your tongue.
Instead of answering your question, Tae does something else you don’t expect. Of course, you know it was going to happen eventually, but the action simultaneously takes your breath away and surprises you.
He kisses you.
Your eyes close on their own accord, reveling at how soft his lips are as they cover yours. A part of you almost can’t believe that you’re kissing him—Kim Taehyung; your friend, the boy you do everything with. What’s most unbelievable is that you actually like kissing him.
As the kiss becomes deeper, you feel yourself being pushed against the bed; Tae’s body covering half your own. You open your mouth a little wider, letting his tongue press against your own. His hands are now on each side of your body, slightly tangled in your hair. After a while you pull away, gasping for air.
“Oh my god,” you mutter breathlessly, blowing some air out of your mouth.
Taehyung is still above you.; and when you look into his eyes, you almost jerk away. “Y/n…”
“Hmm?” you ask, shy all of the sudden.
And then it hits you—he probably thinks your unexperienced ass is a bad kisser. This thought makes you feel like a total fool. It’s just flat out embarrassing because you surprisingly liked kissing him and he thought you—
“Can I kiss you again?”
You almost fall off your bed. “What?”
He lowers his head until his hair brushes your face, “I’d like to kiss you again…”
At his words, you can feel your whole body flush from a mixture of relief, excitement, and embarrassment.
“So…I’m not a bad kisser?” you find yourself asking.
Tae snaps his gaze to you, “What would you think that?”
“I-I,” you feel your ears getting hot, “I don’t know. I just thought that since…you know…I’ve never kissed someone, I probably sucked.”
Before you can explain yourself some more, he captures your lips again—effectively silencing you. This kiss is a lot quicker than the first one, but it leaves you just as dizzy and at a loss for words.
“You’re great,” he says, a cheeky smile gracing his face. You can’t help but return the smile since his is just so contagious.
The rest of this day is spent with more so-called just-for-fun kisses. The highly rational part of you claims that this is all normal—that making out with your friend is completely fine; but the emotional part of you knows that everything will never be the same—that making out with your friend is sure to have its consequences.
***
When school starts again, you almost forget about Taehyung’s kisses.
The keyword is: almost.
In your busy school schedule, you manage to somehow snag a free period. It’s a godsend, especially since you needed a study hall period to balance all the homework you had. Since it was a free period, you can spend the hour anywhere in the school. And you end up choosing one of the back corners of the library where the reference books are.
No one ever comes to this part of the library anyway, except for the librarian but that was rare. So, it’s nice and quiet. You spend the first few days of study hall doing what study hall is supposed to be used for—studying and completing homework. But as the end of the first week rolls around, you discover that study hall might not be so quiet anymore.
This particular day of study hall starts off normal. You arrive at the library, which is pretty much empty except for a few scattered students here and there, and make your way to the corner you’ve pretty much claimed as your own. When you reach that part of the library, you set your things down and pull out your homework. Just as you start the fifth problem on your calculus worksheet, someone suddenly covers your eyes.
You let out a scream, but it’s muted by a hand. You begin to furiously kick and you turn around, prepared to fight. And just as you bring your hands up, your eyes regain their sight and you see who is responsible for the unexpected attack.
“Taehyung!” you scream, and he covers your mouth again.
“Be quiet, y/n!” he reprimands. “Don’t you know this is a library?”
With his hand still over half your face, you roll your eyes. When he finally removes his hand, you roughly shove the boy. “What the fuck, Tae?!”
“What?” he asks rather innocently.
“What?” you mock. “Why did you have to do that? Can’t you see I’m busy?”
He just shrugs and takes a seat beside you, “I just wanted to surprise you, that’s all.”
You return your attention back to your worksheet, ignoring him. You manage do a few more problems before Tae speaks again. “Aren’t you going to ask me why I’m here?”
You don’t even look up. “I honestly don’t care.”
“I mean, are you not the least bit curious as to why I’m not in class right now?”
“No, I don’t care why you’re not—” you snap your head up. Holy shit. “Why aren’t you in chemistry?”
The moment you two received your schedules, you compared classes. Unfortunately, you both wouldn’t share any classes together until after winter break. And while you had your free period, Taehyung was supposed to be in chemistry…so, why is he here in the library?
When he doesn’t respond, you freak out a bit, “Oh my god, Tae! Why are you skipping class? Your teacher is going to be so—”
Taehyung interrupts you by suddenly placing a chaste kiss in your lips. You’re struck speechless for a moment, completely caught off guard.
“I switched my class,” he says with a smile.
“Why did you do that?”
“So I could do this for a whole hour,” he says, then places another kiss on your lips.
You laugh at his words, “You know we can’t actually do that, right? I really need this study hall to do homework.”
He absentmindedly waves his hand, “Yeah, yeah—you can do that too, I guess.”
“Are you serious though? You really changed your class just to come here and make out with me?” As you ask your questions, you are just teasing him. But at the same time, a smidge of you feels a bit dejected if all he wants to do is kiss you.  
Not that you didn’t like kissing Taehyung, because all the kissing you two had been doing is great, but it made your relationship seem superficial if that was the only reason.
“Of course not,” he assures you. “I also really just want to spend time with you too. To go from spending every day together to practically not seeing each other is weird.”
“Agreed,” you smile. “How did you find me anyway?”
It was a logical question. Although Tae did know before that you had study hall, you never told him where exactly you spent your days.
“I just followed you from your last class,” he says like it’s nothing, but your eyes widen.
Another what the fuck leaves your mouth as you stare at your friend, “You’ve been in here the whole time?”
“I mean, I had to find where you were somehow,” he tells you. “By the way, you walk so damn fast.”
You roll your eyes at the boy, not understanding him at all. Even though he had unconventional ways of doing things, in the end, he still made you smile. For the rest of the hour, you somehow find the time to finish your math worksheet in-between the kisses that Taehyung keeps giving you. When the bell rings, signaling the end of the hour, you begin to back up your things.
“Where you headed to now?”
You look at Tae and tell him where, even though he knows the answer already, “English. You?”
Health. “Health.”
“Well, I hope you enjoy that…”
“The teacher isn’t that bad,” he smiles as you give him a look.
“He’s terrible,” you say. “End of discussion.”
Taehyung picks up his bag, smile still ever present, “Just because you didn’t make an A—”
“End of discussion.”
You sling you backpack around your back and begin to walk away. But before you can even get far, something pulls you back. You land right onto Taehyung’s chest; being this close to him, you can feel the slight muscle definition under his flimsy uniform and warmth pools in your chest.
“What?” you ask, turning around.
“Have a good rest of your day,” he says. “See you here tomorrow?”
Nodding, you open your mouth to respond, only to be interrupted by Tae’s kiss that he gives before dashing away. He leaves you alone scattered brain and at a loss for words.
“…See you,” you say once your brain can finally function again. “Tomorrow.”
***
Afternoons spent in the library become something you look forward to everyday.
Even though it’s only an hour, it’s an hour you cherish with Taehyung. Some days, all you do is homework—completely ignoring the poor boy who simply wanted your attention; and other days, you two talk and talk and talk about anything and everything. There is never a dull, quiet moment between you two. There is always something to be shared; to be told.
Because of this, your admiration for the boy grows more and more each day.
You are captivated by the stories he tells you in that vacant part of the library. From the way his animated eyes light up to the wide curve of his boxy grin, an hour never feels long enough. As he tells you his stories, all you can do is stare and smile. You’ve only known Taehyung for a few months, but it feels like you two have been friends forever.
…Friends who kiss, a little voice in your head always likes to remind you.
Kissing. You two are doing that quite a lot now. Every chance he has, he plants his lips on to yours. The action makes you swoon and confused all at the same time. You just don’t get it. It’s not that you don’t enjoy all the kissing, but it’s confusing. Does Taehyung like you? Or does he not? And it’s that you want to be with him, as his girlfriend…though perhaps a small part of you does, but you want him to be clear about his relationship with you.
And that clarification never comes.
Tae continues with the kisses, and you just learn to accept the fact that maybe your friend just likes to kiss you. It get to the point where you no longer even question or become surprised when the action appears out of nowhere.
But little do you know that this is just the beginning of something tragic.
***
In the blink of an eye, the fall semester ends.
You and Taehyung rejoice as you both finish it rather decently; getting good marks in all of your classes. Celebrations are in the making, but a spontaneous trip from your parents brings all plans to a halt.  
“You’re going where?” Taehyung asks you, eyes wide and mouth parted.
“To spend the holidays with my aunt who lives in the States,” you repeat, not able to look him in the eyes.
You two have been laying in his bed playing video games, until you dropped the bomb on him. And it’s not like you’ve known about the trip for a while, you just found out from your parents yesterday. Honestly, you hadn’t planned to do much during break. If anything, you just wanted to spend time with Tae and catch up on sleep. But then your parents surprised you, and you couldn’t say no.
“B-But…that’s an entire ocean away.”
You look at the boy who has easily become your best friend, “I know—and it’s not like I really want to go, but I haven’t seen my aunt in a while. Plus, my parents already bought me the ticket and—”
“It’s okay,” he cuts your explanation off, a strained smile encasing his face. “You enjoy visiting your aunt.”
“Tae…” you know he’s probably really mad.
He only shakes his head “No, really, it’s not like we didn’t already makes plans to hang out or anything.”
“Taehyung,” now you find yourself getting mad. “Stop.”
“I’m just bummed, y/n. What am I supposed to do during break now?”
You shrug, “I don’t know. Go to a party, get drunk, and maybe kiss a few girls.”
As you say the last part, your heart starts hammering in your chest. You don’t even know why you said it at all since you can’t even begin to imagine it happening. Just the thought of another girl kissing Tae makes you green with jealously. But you know you don’t even have the right to feel such things; you aren’t his keeper.
You wait for him to respond, but he doesn’t say anything.
“I was joking,” you attempt to laugh, but it sounds forced. “But really—have fun. You don’t need me for that.”
And that’s when he gives you a look that nearly paralyzes you. His gaze is filled with so many emotions you can’t decipher, and it travels down to your core. He stares at you for so long you feel your blood pressure start to spike.
“I guess,” he says in a lower voice. You don’t know what else to say, so silence begins pooling in his room. It becomes too much to handle so you get off the bed.
“I should go,” you say, awkwardly getting your things. “I still have to pack.”
“Are you leaving tomorrow?” Taehyung doesn’t even look at you; instead, he stares at the ceiling.
You’re about to nod, but then catch yourself. “Yeah, I am.”
“When do you get back?”
Hesitation gnaws at your lips, “The day before school starts again.”
You search your friends face for a sign—any sign—but he’s completely passive. A sigh leaves you lips as you back out of his room. When you reach the door, you stop and brace yourself against it.
“I’m sorry,” you apologize for reasons you don’t even really understand. But Tae is still in the same position and doesn’t even glance your way. You sigh again before muttering a soft goodbye and leaving.
The entire time you’re away, you don’t get a single message or phone call from him.
It wouldn’t have affected you so much if you knew why. Obviously, Taehyung is mad at you, but you didn’t know the reason. And the boy has never been angry at you before; so you don’t know how to deal or how to make it better.
Even though you don’t know why he hasn’t tried to contact you, it doesn’t stop you. When you landed in the States, you texted him. On Christmas Eve, you called three times. On Christmas day, you called and left a ridiculously long voicemail—along with a few extra texts as well. Despite these efforts, you get nothing; you don’t even know if he’s reading these texts because he doesn’t have his read receipts on.
So, a few days before New Year’s, you decide to go home early. You don’t want to end the year on a bad note with Tae, and you also don’t want to start the year off not speaking. Somehow, you manage to get back the afternoon of New Year’s Eve. And the second you get home, you go to his house.
Knocking on the front door like a maniac, you pray that he hadn’t taken your advice and decided just to lounge around his house over break. Your heart is beating erratically as his mom answers the door.
“Oh, hi y/n,” she greets you with a warm smile. “How was your trip?”
“Hey, Mrs. Kim; it was good. Is Taehyung home?” you cut right to the chase.
But disappointment begins to fill you when her smile falters, “I’m sorry, y/n; he’s actually hasn’t been home all day.”
You nearly fall to the ground at her words. “What? Do you know where he is?”
“I’ve tried calling him, but he hasn’t answered. I guess he didn’t know you were coming home?”
“Yeah, I wasn’t supposed to be home for another few days,” you admit, and his mother nods. “I-I just couldn’t…I mean…I just…I missed him.” Saying the words out loud brings a weight off your shoulders, but also makes your chest ache.
“He’s missed you too,” she says, smiling again. “He’s been sulking around the house this entire month—I think today’s the first day he’s been out.” They do say that mothers know best, so knowing that Taehyung missed you makes your heart soar high.
“Do you have any idea where he might be?” desperation laces your words.
Mrs. Kim shakes her head, “He has old friends, but I don’t think he’s talked to them since meeting you.”
Why is this so difficult? You continue your conversation with his mom to think about the boy’s whereabouts, but soon realize how late it’s gotten. You figure that you should probably just go home. So, feeling a bit defeated, you wish his mom a Happy New Year and walk back to your house.
On the way there, you run through various places he might be. You try to think back to before you left—to the plans you two made together. Did he mention anything in particular that he wanted to do? You replay old conversations and then it suddenly hits you like a freight truck. Quickly, you whip out your phone and call Yoon, one of your childhood friends.
After three rings, she picks up, “Hello? Y/n…?”
“Hey…” you trail off.
On the other end, you can hear a heavy bass thumping, “Well, I haven’t heard from you in a while.”
You tell her that you can’t hear anything she’s saying, so she moves somewhere quieter and repeats her words. You can’t help but roll your eyes at her petty tone. “Like you even have time for me. You and your boyfriend are always—”
“So, what’s up?” she cuts you off and you laugh a bit.
“Where are you?”
“At a party at Jay’s house, why?”
Bingo. “Thanks, that’s all I needed to know.”
“Woah,” you hear her say, “is little miss goody-two-shoes going to make an appearance?”
“We’ll see,” you tell her.
After hanging up, you run the rest of the way home. The party Yoon was at was hosted by the one and only Jay. He’s a senior at your school and notorious for his parties. They are the best, but exclusive to upper-classmen—juniors and seniors only. Everyone couldn’t wait until they were promoted to those grades.
The one thing you remember Tae saying was that he wanted to attend one this year—that’s where he has to be tonight.
***
As you walk up the steps to Jay’s elaborate mansion, it was beyond huge, you feel your nerves twist up in a bundle. You figured that since this is a party, albeit a New Year’s Eve party, you should probably look somewhat nice—just so you kind of blend in. You opt for a black dress that hugs whatever curves you do have and your basic strappy heels. Hopefully no one’s going to question you.
When you reach the door, you’re surprised to find that it opens easily. Walking in, you’re blown away by the sheer amount of people. You thought that since the house is so big, there would be room inside. Wrong. People are packed wall-to-wall.
As soon as the door shuts behind you, you see Yoon standing not too far from you. Relief fills you at the sight of a familiar face. You call out her name and she, thankfully, hears, turning around to your direction.
“Y/n!” she exclaims, running up to you. “You look sexy!”
You feel a blush creep onto your face, “Thanks?”
“Who you dressing up for?”
“I’m just trying to blend in,” you say, brushing a few strands of hair away from your face. “But can you help me find someone?”
“So, there is someone,” she wiggles her brows. “Who?”
“Taehyung,” you say his name all too fast.
“As in Kim Taehyung?” Yoon raises a brow. “Is he that guy you’ve been hanging out with?”
“What other Taehyung is there? Have you seen him? I think he’s supposed to be here. God I hope—”
Yoon places a hand over your mouth, “Clam down, tiger. I’ll ask one of Jay’s friends—they know everybody.”
You watch as she walks away from you and to a guy a few feet away. She whispers something in his ear and he nods, whispering something back. Yoon seems pleased with the answer and comes back to you.
“So?” you ask impatiently.
“They say he’s here,” you immediately brighten up, feeling like a genius for guessing his location right, “but they don’t know where exactly he is.”
Your eyes automatically begin searching the room, “That’s okay; I’ll find him. Thanks again Yoon.”
Before Yoon can say anything else, you’re lost in the crowd of sweaty people. As you walk through the crowd, your eyes desperately search for his. This is going to be impossible—there are so many people here. You walk through the numerous living areas and even the kitchen, but there’s no sign of Tae anywhere.
After a while, you check the time and see that it was an hour until midnight; an hour till the start of the New Year. And you’re on the verge of going back home. The feeling of jet lag is starting to weigh you down as the adrenaline begins to drain away. The flight back home was long, and you couldn’t really sleep due to the anticipation of everything that awaited you here.
You are now walking down some hallway, the music of the party booming behind you. The sense of direction’s completely loss to you—you have no idea where you were. But just as you’re about to reach the end of the hall, someone comes up behind you.
They grab ahold of your body and drag you into an open room. You scream, kicking your attacker. You try to fight the person, but they’re no match for your puny self. On the verge of tears, you’re about the give up when the person finally speaks, “Y/n…”
You freeze. You would know that voice anywhere. “Tae?”
The attacker lets you go and you slowly turn around, shocked to see the face of your friend. But the shock soon fades into something strange when you take in his appearance—the boy actually looks nice. His hair is disheveled in that messy, but put together, way and his clothes sexily cling against him. You feel your mouth drop open, but you pick it up just as quickly as it falls.
Suddenly, you push him, and he stumbles, “What the hell?”
“Why do you always feel the need to sneak up on me? Asshole,” you cross your arms.
He cracks a smile, “You’re just fun to mess with.”
“It’s not fun for me, you jerk. I was seriously freaked out.”
Taehyung softens at your words, “I’m sorry; I just wanted to surprise you.”
And that’s when you remember why you’re even here at all. You suddenly feel awkward, not knowing where to look.
“Why…why didn’t you return any of my calls?” you ask him, staring at the floor. “I mean, I know you’re mad. But you couldn’t text me back?”
You sneak a look at him, and find that he’s staring intently at you.
“And like, I don’t even know why you’re mad at me. What did I do wrong? Was it because I went away? Or was it something I did? I just—”
Tae cuts you off with a kiss that causes you to nearly trip on your own feet. The kiss is intense and you feel him back you against the wall, encasing your body with his. You haven’t kissed him in nearly a month; you’ve forgotten how it feels like, how alive he makes you feel.
His hands begin traveling up your body, each touch igniting a fire inside of you. He stops when he reaches your face, his long fingers roughly cupping your cheeks. You bring your own hands to tangle in his hair and gently tug him closer to you. His starts to rub little circles on your cheeks, while simultaneously prodding your mouth further open. You oblige and feel his tongue massaging yours.
Suddenly, you let out a moan as Tae presses his body right onto yours. Despite the layers of clothing between the two of you, you can still feel the body heat coming off of him. At your moan, he freezes for a moment before kissing you back with much more force. He pulls the two of you away from the wall and you both fall onto a bed.
The dress you’re wearing begins to ride up, but you don’t care at all; you just want to be closer to him, needing to be closer to him. You pull away from his lips to breathe and he takes that opportunity to latch his lips onto your jaw, slowly moving down your neck. Another moan leaves your lips and you try to think, but your mind is complete mush right now.
All you can do is lay there as Tae begins to suck on your neck. Although you two had kissed multiple times before, things have never gone this far.
“Tae…” you say a bit breathlessly, his finger now pushing the straps of your dress down. He mutters something incoherent, mouth on the swells of your breast. “What are we doing?”
He stops, raising his head, “I’m worshiping your body, what else?”
You redden as his comment.
“Do you want me to stop?” he asks, a brow raised. When you simply shake your head, his lips travel back to your chest.
Without even realizing it, you start to move your hips against his. A pleasurable pressure starts building up and you whimper at the feeling. Taehyung stop his assault on your skin, eyes now looking into yours. As he stares at you, his fingers play with the zipper on the side of your dress.
“This dress is awfully pretty on you,” he licks his lips. “But I think it’ll look prettier on the floor, don’t you think?”
And faster than you can even comprehend his words, the dress is unzipped from your body and you’re left half-naked in your underwear. Impulse kicks in and you try to cover your body at the sudden lack of coverage. But Tae takes your arms, pinning them above your head.
“So beautiful,” he muses, eyes darkening.
You writhe underneath him, not liking the fact that you’re nearly naked while he’s still completely clothed. When you tell him this fact, he releases your arms and begins to unbutton his shirt. You can’t help but stare at his golden skin and his broad shoulders. He reaches for the waistband of his pants, unbuttons it, and then tugs the fabric down his legs.
Tae smirks at your obvious staring and leans down to kiss you again. The rest of your clothing, or whatever was left, comes off and you’re both left completely exposed to each other. Now without all the clothes between you two, you can feel every ridge of his body and desire threatens to burst out of your body.
“Do you want me to stop?” he asks you again, resting his forehead against yours.
You shake your head, “No.”
“Are you sure?” his eyes search your face. “Because if we start, I-I don’t think I’ll be able to stop.”
Grabbing his face between your hands, you kiss him, “I’m sure.”
You are long past the point of no return. The rational part of you is screaming that this is a terrible idea, that this is bound to ruin your friendship with Tae. But you can’t find it in yourself to really care. You want him, so badly you are about to burst.
Even though you assure Tae that you want this, he still hesitates above you. As he rolls a condom on, you lightly kiss his jaw and tell him that you’re okay. But although you say this, you feel your body tense as he nears your entrance. This is your first time after all, and you realize Taehyung is becoming a lot of your firsts. When he finally enters you, you scrunch up your face from the initial discomfort. “Ow.”
“Shit,” you hear Tae mutter, stopping halfway.
“It’s okay,” you bite your bottom lip. “Keep going.”
He pushes the rest of the way, “You’re so fucking tight.”
You still feel a sense of discomfort, especially since Tae’s large size fills you up to the brim. Despite this, you tell him to keep moving in hopes that maybe the awkwardness will fade into something better. And a few thrusts in, it does feel better—a lot better.
Tae’s pace is still rather slow, but the pleasure starts to build up and he drops his head into the crook of your shoulder. You moan for him to go faster but he doesn’t, probably due to the fear of hurting you.
So you tighten your legs around him, “Tae—harder, faster.”
Something in him snaps and his thrust become shorter, but quicker. The force causes your eyes to roll back and you cry out at how good it feels, “Fuck.”
He groans your name, one hand roughly digging into your hips. It all feels so good, and you’re surprised by how vocal you are—a moan always seems to be leaving your mouth. But you don’t care at all if anyone hears. You continue to moan as you feel your peak building. Sweat rolls down both of your backs, and you can feel Tae’s thrusts getting sloppy.
“Ohmygod,” you say in a single breath. “I’m gonna—”
And just as you’re about to say the words, waves of ecstasy crash down on you. You cry out Taehyung’s name, the feeling completely indescribable. He continues to ride out your high before reaching his own. After he releases, he falls on top of you and presses a gentle kiss on your neck. You both don’t say anything for a few moments, still trying to catch your breaths.
“Are you okay?” Tae is the first to speak. He mumbles this question into your neck.
You nod your head, “Yeah…are you?”
“I’m…good. Better than good, actually,” he raises his head, smiling. “You’re beautiful, y/n.”
You blush at his words, not knowing how to respond.
“But, you are quite loud though,” he says. “I’m sure the entire house heard us.”
He laughs and you push him away, forgetting that he’s still inside of you. You both moan from the loss of contact, feeling sort of empty now. Once he’s away from you, you remember just how naked you are and rush to pull the blankets over your body. But you wince a few times due to the soreness you feel.
“What are you doing?”
“Covering myself,” you say once the sheets are pulled all the way up to your chin.
“I just saw you completely naked though,” Tae laughs.
You raise a brow, “And?”
“And?” he repeats. “And you shouldn’t have to cover yourself.”
“Let me live, Tae.”
“Why’d you come back early?” his sudden question throws you off a bit.
You look at him, seeing genuine curiosity in his eyes, “I just wanted to see you.”
“Really?” he looks shocked.
“Yeah,” you feel embarrassed now. “I just…didn’t want to end the year on the bad note or start the year off with you hating me.”
His gaze softens, “I don’t hate you. I was just frustrated. You’re my best friend, and you leaving felt like you were betraying me.”
“Stupid,” you say.
“Okay, so maybe I was,” he rolls his eyes. “But speaking of the New Year…”
He searches for something amongst the clothing items scattered on the floor. You have to force yourself not to look at him as he bends down to put his clothes back on. As he looks for whatever he’s looking for, you search for your own clothes and do the same. Once he jumps back on the bed, his phone is in his hand. He presses the home button and smiles.
“It’s 11:59; make a wish!” he says and you quickly shut your eyes. But before you can even fully think of something, he crashes you into a hug, planting a chaste kiss on your forehead. “Happy New Year, y/n!”
You smile, “Happy New Year, Kim Taehyung.”
“Thanks for being the best. Forgive for being an ass and not calling back,” he says, still hugging you tightly. “Friends still?”
“The best of friends,” you’re still smiling, but it’s forced. You feel your face tremble, your hands shaking a bit as you cling onto him. A sudden, lone tears falls down your face.
Best friends. Just friends.
As you utter the words in your head, your heart sinks deeper and deeper.
***
As the years roll by, you’ve come to terms that the relationship you have with Tae has morphed into a friends with benefits ordeal. It’s that kind of situation because no one knows what you two are doing—no one but you and Tae. Everyone continued to believe that you both were just best friends, but behind closed doors you two were fucking. A lot.  
At first, you were hesitant to accept that this was to be your reality. You didn’t want to be a friend that he fucked; you wanted to be more or nothing at all. But you couldn’t lose the boy; he was a part of your life and you needed him. And it just so happened to be via this relationship.
But that’s not the only thing.
Since you two weren’t exclusive, and no one knew, it meant you technically could date other people—which you guys did. Initially, you were green with envy. You didn’t like the idea that he was being intimate with other girls who weren’t you. But you realize it was foolish to think that since you were doing the same thing.
During senior year, you dated someone just because you felt obligated to. Also, Tae was in a relationship as well so you needed the distraction. You were intimate with the guy, but he wasn’t Tae. And you hated yourself for thinking that.
You also hated yourself even more for always caving into Kim Taehyung. No matter the situation, you could never say no to him. You ended up having to break up with that particular boyfriend of yours since you cheated on him one too many times.
When it was time to go to college, it was the only logical choice for you both to attend the same school. You needed Taehyung just as much as you needed air to breath. The application period was nerve-wracking because you were scared that you two wouldn’t get into the same schools. But by some miracle, you did.
College was honestly a blur. Because of your friendship with Tae, it was hard to stay in relationships with other guys. You tried to date other people but it never felt the same. No one else knew your body as well as Tae. He knew exactly what you liked, and exactly how to do it.  
It was frustrating.
There were many times you wanted it to end, but Taehyung would just show up right back at your door and your selfish self let him right back in. It was a never-ending cycle. And in all honesty, it was a toxic relationship. No one should be so caught up with someone they weren’t dating, and yet here you two were—a terrible exception.
You were always terrified that people would find out about you and Tae’s secret, especially your parents. What would they even say? As much as they loved Tae, you were sure that they would be disappointed. They would be probably be most unhappy about the fact that you ruined so many potentially great relationships over a boy who didn’t even love you.
At least, not in the way you deserved to be loved.
“Do you love me?” you randomly asked one day.
Perhaps it was the sexual high that messed with your brain, but you’re not sure why you decided to ask him the big question. Tae was still breathing hard beside you, recovering from the sex you two just had.
“Of course,” he breathed out, “you’re my best friend.”
You heart sank a little, “So, like, that friend-love then?”
“Why are you even asking?” he turned to the side, facing you.
“I don’t know,” you shrugged. “Just curious, I guess.”
But you did know. Despite it all being no-strings-attached, you started to feel a little too attached.
You weren’t sure when it occurred, but you suddenly started noticing the little things. Even though you had known Tae for years, you never realized how fond you were of everything he did. Of all the people in the world, you didn’t understand why it had to be him. He didn’t love you beyond a friend, and he probably would never feel anything more for you. So, why did you continue to let him fuck your brains out? You didn’t have an answer to that.
After college, you tried to stop seeing Tae all together, but the boy was so damn persistent. He just didn’t know how to leave your life. It was like he was torturing you; dangling you on a minuscule rope that hovered above an ocean. But despite the torture, every time you saw him, your heart grew more and more for him. It was a strange feeling honestly; being so incredibly fond of someone, but also wanting to be far away from them.
Every night, you wondered why life turned out to be this way for you—stuck in an unrequited, friends with benefits relationship. As you thought these things, you couldn’t help but realize how fucked up it all was.
A part of you wished that you had never decided to come home early that New Year’s Eve so long ago. If you hadn’t come home, you wouldn’t have called Yoon. If you hadn’t called her, you wouldn’t have gone to Jay’s stupid house party. If you hadn’t gone to that damn house party, you wouldn’t have let Tae fuck you for the first time. If that night would’ve never happened, you wouldn’t be here questioning everything.
But would that have really changed anything?
***
You down another shot glass.
A friend from work invited you out to her birthday party, and you figured it would be an intimate affair since she was rather quiet. She also told you to bring a plus-one, so you dragged Taehyung out too because you figured you needed someone to talk to. Instead of a small party, you found yourself in a club filled with many people. And you are now alone, your plus-one nowhere to be found.
The moment you two entered the club, Tae wandered from your side. Out of the two of you, he has always been the more social one; making friends everywhere he went. You managed to find the friend who invited you, but you didn’t get to talk long—like you had predicted earlier—and simply ended up at the bar.
“Did you want another one?”
You look at the bartender, eyes slightly narrowed, “What do you think?”
“I was just asking,” he says, wiping the inside of a glass. “I mean, you’ve had a few.”
You take the briefest moment to do a once over of the bartender, and you smile a little to yourself—he’s kind of cute. Even though you swear you only stare at him for a second, he catches you and pink tinges your cheeks.
“I wasn’t looking at you, I swear,” you say, looking anywhere but at him.
He just laughs, “It’s okay; it’s not every day a pretty girl stares at me with drool forming at the corner of her mouth.”
You widen your eyes, “I was not drooling!”
“Kidding,” he smiles, and you feel your heart warm just a bit. “What’s your name? I’ve never seen you here before.”
“Y/n, and I’m only here for a birthday…though it’s quite obvious I’m not really participating. What’s your name?”
“Hoseok,” he says, and you repeat it in your head a million times.
A smile forms on your lips, “Nice to meet you.”
As am easy conversation forms between you and Hoseok, you can’t help but laugh at everything he says. It feels nice to laugh, especially since it feels like you haven’t done so in a long time. In this moment, you feel kind of glad you decided to come out tonight.
“So, about that drink,” Hoseok asks, face close to yours.
“I’d love another—”
Before you can finish your sentence, you feel a sudden presence behind you.
“I believe she’s fine.”
You turn around, eyes meeting Tae’s. “What are you doing?”
Instead of saying anything, he just grabs your wrist and pulls you off your stool.
“Tae!”
With his free hand, he reaches inside his pocket and pulls out a few bills. He throws them on the counter, telling the Hoseok to keep the change. You struggle against his hold, not understanding why he’s doing this—you really wanted another drink and you wanted to talk to the cute bartender some more. And the last thing you wanted was to deal with Kim Taehyung.
He drags you both through the club, past masses of people. You’re not able to break free until he slips the two of you outside. As the door shuts behind you, a chill from the night hits you and you curse yourself for not bringing a jacket.
But even though you’re cold, a flash of anger heats you up momentarily, “What the hell, Taehyung?”
Rarely do you ever call him Taehyung to his face. At the sound of his full name being used, his mouth tightens and he looks at you. “I should be asking you that.”
“Oh my god,” you roll your eyes. “You’re being ridiculous.”
“Why were you flirting with the bartender?” he asks, eyes narrowing.
You cross your arms over your chest, “The bartender has a name, and it’s Hoseok.”
“So you guys are on a first name basis?”
“He asked for my name, and I was not flirting with him,” you say. “We were just talking.”
“Hmm…I guess we have different versions of talking then; I don’t recall talking including his face being two inches away from yours,” Tae practically yells, and you can’t believe this is actually happening.
“Like you’re one to talk! I saw you walk away from me when we got here to go talk to girls, you hypocrite.”
He scoffs, “I was not talking to girls.”
Just recently, there’s something off in your friendship; a loose screw. For some reason, you two are fighting a lot more; finding the dumbest things to pick out and argue about. Also, Tae has picked up a habit of being overprotective. It makes no sense why he suddenly feels the need to act in such a way.
“Seriously, you need to chill out,” you tell him, not understanding why he’s being so unreasonable.
“You should take your own advice.”
“Maybe I will,” you sigh, turning around and walking away from him.
You only make it a few steps before an arm pulls you back, “Where are you going?”
“Didn’t you say for me to take my own advice? Well, I am; which means I’m leaving,” you say before pushing him away and walking again.
“Y/n,” he says your name, but you don’t care to stop. “Y/n.”
You throw up a middle finger, still walking down the street.
“Fuck. Stop it, you idiot. Let me just drive you home.”
“No,” is your immediate response, but you doubt that he can hear you. All you really want to do right now is take off all the damn makeup you are wearing and sleep.
“Y/n,” Tae repeats, “I’m sorry. Please stop. You’re angry at me, I know, but let me just drive you. I’d hate for you to walk home. It’s dangerous and I don’t want you to get hurt.”
Stopping halfway down the street, you look over your shoulder. Even under the dim lighting of the streetlights, you can see the sincerity in his eyes. You walk back to him, nod, and then walk to his car. The whole ride to your apartment, you two don’t speak. Instead, soft music from the radio fills the silence. Aside from not talking to him, you also angle your body away from him; you choose to look out the window, watching the night come alive.
When he stops in front of your building, you quickly unbuckle yourself and get out of the car. You practically run to your door, not wanting to let Tae say a single thing to you. And, thankfully, he doesn’t. As you lock your front door behind you, you look out through the little peephole and see that he hasn’t left yet. Shockingly, it takes him a few minutes to leave; when he does finally drive off, you sink to your knees.
***
The next evening, someone knocks at your door.
At first, you’re hesitant to open the door since you didn’t plan on anyone coming over. When you check to see who it is, your eyes widen. Unlocking the door, you shift awkwardly on your feet, “Tae? What are you doing?”
In front of you, he stands with a bag of takeout, your favorite, and a bottle of wine.
“I brought food,” he says, pushing past you to walk inside. He leaves you standing at the door confused.
“Why?” you follow him into your small kitchen, crossing your arms over your chest.
Tae looks at you and raises a brow, “I can’t come over and bring food?”
You don’t respond because he knows why you’re questioning him. You are still mad at him for what happened last night at the club. He had no right to act the way he did.
“I’m hurt,” he feigns sadness, clutching his chest. “I thought we were best friends?”
“We are,” you say, and he smiles. “But you were an asshole yesterday.”
The smile on his face falls, “I know, and that’s why I brought your favorite takeout.”
“You’re trying to apologize through takeout?”
“Is it working?”
You roll your eyes; you can never win. Although you want to be mad at him, you know that you can never be. “Maybe.”
A smile graces his face again, the corners of his eyes crinkling. “Great; that’s better than no.”
He grabs your hand and walks you both into the living room. Taking the boxes out of the paper bag, he hands you your favorite dish and digs into his own. As you two settle on the couch, with the TV play some random movie, you can’t help but stare at him.
After you slipped into bed last night, you stayed up and thought a lot about your relationship with Taehyung. You spent many nights thinking about him, but last night you finally decided on something: you are going to end the friends with benefits relationship with him. This decision came to you because you realized that you both aren’t happy.
You loved Tae beyond the lines of a best friend.
There; you finally admitted it.
As much as you wanted to make him happy, to him you are just the best friend. Nothing more, nothing less. Maybe that’s why you enjoyed Hoseok’s company so much last night—he actually gave you the attention you so desperately wanted from Tae. After all these years, you figured it’s time that he receives the happiness he deserves. You deserve happiness too, even if it means letting him go.
“What?” he suddenly asks, not looking away from the TV screen.
“Nothing,” you say, shoving some food in your mouth. Despite thinking these thoughts, you aren’t sure how to break the news to him.
After the random takeout night, everything returns to how it always used to be—the same cycle of a toxic, friends with benefits relationship. Each time you climbed into Taehyung’s bed or he yours, you swore it would be the last time. Hell, you even slipped it out once that it was going to be the last time, but he just laughed and carried on.
A few weeks go by, and you find yourself at Tae’s house once again. He invited you over to watch a movie, but you two are doing everything but that.
He’s pressed against you, peppering kisses along your jaw and down your neck. After so many years of being intimate together, Tae knows your body like the back of his hand. You moan as he slides a hand underneath your shirt to touch one of your sensitive breasts. His other hand begins to travel to the button of your jeans. Your body screams in anticipation, but he suddenly stops.
“Bed. Now,” he says, and then picks you up.
Tae carries you across his apartment to his bedroom, and sets you at the foot of his bed. You take a second to glance around the room you’ve come to memorize so well.
“This is the last time, okay?” your words are sincere tonight; after this, it’s officially over.
But Taehyung doesn’t even glance at your face as he discards your shirt on the floor. The next thing to come off are your jeans, and you’re left in only your underwear. This scene is all too familiar.
“Why am I always the first to get naked?” you ask.
He smirks, taking his shirt and pants off. “Better?”
“Much,” you say with a pang in your heart as you stare at the beautiful human being in front of you. In this moment, you see just how grown up Taehyung has gotten. He isn’t the lanky boy you met all those years ago anymore. Now, as your eyes travel over the golden skin that stretches over his toned body, he’s a man.
Tae proceeds to rip your underwear off and you slide his boxers off. He immediately pushes you back on the bed, hands spreading your legs apart. His lips attach to your inner thighs, leaving teasing kisses everywhere. You moan, begging him for more. So, he brings a finger to your entrance, smirking again.
“So wet already,” he muses just before replacing his finger with his mouth.
As he begins to lick you, you weave your fingers into his hair. “Yes, Tae. Oh my god.”
He looks up at you from where he’s positioned between your legs, and you nearly orgasm on the spot. The smolder in his gaze lights up your entire body. As he continues to use tongue, which you’re sure is magical, his eyes never move away from yours and you swear that you’ve never seen anything sexier in your life.
He applies more pressure and you pull his hair tighter, feeling yourself getting close. You moan and arch your back, hands fisting the sheets around you. Just as you’re about to see the stars, Tae suddenly pulls his mouth away. Immediately you whimper, not liking the loss of touch. You start to complain, but don’t get very far before he suddenly shoves two fingers inside of you. The fullness causes you to reach your peak, and you cry out his name.
“That’s it, you dirty girl,” he still pumps his fingers inside of you, helping you ride out your high. “So sexy.”
It all just feels so good, and you nearly question your decision. You lift your head up once you’ve recovered and manage a small smile, “My turn.”
Taehyung’s eyes widen for a moment and you take the chance to pull him onto the bed, flipping positions so you’re on top. One of your hands reaches for his cock, moaning a bit when you realize how hard he is already. You stoke his member a few times before bending down to take him into your mouth. In all honesty, you are never one to really give blowjobs. It’s not that you hate giving them, it just never fits the flow; Tae almost always goes down on you and then fucks you—he never really gives you many chances to return the favor.
But from the expression on his face, you know he absolutely loves it.
“Shit,” he groans as you take him deeper into your mouth.
His cock hits the back of your throat and you gag a bit, feeling tears forming in your eyes. Even though giving blowjobs is rather uncomfortable sometimes, it’s worth seeing the reaction from Tae. His breaths are getting heavier; he’s getting close. This fact prompts you to suck harder, paying more attention to his sensitive head.
“Y/n—fucking shit—stop.”
Your eyes meet his from underneath your lashes. Letting go of his cock with a pop sound, you ask, “Is there something wrong?”
Tae has never stopped you from finishing a blowjob before.
He runs a hand over his face, “It feels so fucking good.”
“Why’d you want me to stop then?”
He leans up and captures your lips in a kiss. You kiss him back hard, pushing everything into the kiss. He breaks away first, resting his forehead against yours. “I want to cum inside you.”
And before you can comprehend his words, he flips you over onto your stomach and lifts your ass up. Without much warning, he slams inside you. This is done without much effort because you’re still wet from earlier. You both moan at the feeling of being connected like this; he has always filled you up so well.
Tae grips onto your hips as he moves fast, thrusting into you relentlessly. All you can do is sink your head into the bedsheets and take the pleasure. You’ve always loved this position since Tae goes so much deeper, hitting all the right spots. The same pleasure from earlier starts to build up inside of you again, and you tell him to go harder. And he does, leaning over you so he doesn’t move out much and ends up going even deeper than before.
You moan into the sheets, the pleasure becoming almost unbearable. Tae begins to suck onto the skin of your shoulders, no doubt leaving hickeys. This act just adds to the pleasure and you feel like you’re about to burst. Suddenly, Taehyung flips you over onto your back and crashes his lips on you.
As he kisses you, his hips move faster and you feel so so close.
“Cum for me, baby,” Tae whispers into your ears, fingers finding your sensitive clit, and that does the trick.
Your orgasm hits you like a freight truck, tightening your walls around Tae. Within seconds, he reaches his climax too, releasing himself into you. After this, he falls on top of you. But unlike other times, he doesn’t stay in the position long and rolls over. His chest rapidly rises up and down, sweating covering his entire body. You try to catch your own breath, feeling your heart beating erratically.
He turns his head to look at you and smiles, “Fucking perfect as always, y/n.”
Placing a quick kiss on your forehead, he gets up to grab a rag to clean the both of you. Once you clean the creampie off of you, he hands you a t-shirt and pulls his own boxers on. He whispers goodnight and falls asleep immediately. You take in his sleeping form—long eye lashes, soft lips; he looks like an angel. You can’t help but bring a hand to his face, trailing your fingers along his skin.
After a few moments, you roll over; feeling the weight of the world on your shoulders. You shut your eyes tightly, tears flowing down your face. A silent sob racks its way through your body because this was the last time. You were serious when you said those words to him before. Being in this toxic relationship isn’t an option anymore—you can’t deal with being the girl he simply used for sex.
You craved intimacy beyond that.
You wanted something deep, all consuming. Was that so bad?
While Tae slept peacefully beside you, you couldn’t relax at all. The thought of you leaving him haunted you. Before anything, he’s your best friend; you don’t want to lose him. At the same time, though, you know that you can’t keep him in your life. You want so much more, and he can’t give you that. So in your mind, it’s better just to break yourself away entirely.
Before the sun rises, you quietly get out of Taehyung’s bed and grab your clothes. You decide to keep his shirt, wanting to be selfish one last time. When you have all your things, you finally look at his sleeping form. Your heart hangs heavy in your chest; it hurt like hell now, but you would be grateful later…right?
Slipping out of his apartment, you drive home feeling like a total mess. Once you make it to your place, you immediately crawl into bed and cry yourself to sleep.
***
It’s one of those nights again.
The world is asleep, yet you are still wide awake—heart aching, mind running a thousand miles an hour. No matter what you try, sleep does not come. It’s like life is torturing you.
Since you left Taehyung’s house that one morning, you haven’t been able to sleep well. Every time you thought you finally were going to drift into dreamland for the night, his face would creep right into your mind. His expressive eyes, the gentle slope of his nose, the curve of his boxy grin—it was all ingrained in your mind. And you hated it. You also hated how you could still feel his burning touch on your skin; the way his large hands caressed your body.
Not only couldn’t you sleep well, but Tae calls you every day. He blows up your phone, leaving a voicemail every single time.
Y/n, pick up the phone.
Call me back soon, okay?
Is everything okay? Are you okay??
What did I do wrong? Call me back.
I know you’re listening to these messages since your voice mailbox isn’t full…call me soon.
…please pick up, y/n. Please.
As you listen to each message, your heart breaks a little more. You’re at a point now that you feel like you don’t even have a heart since you just feel so broken. The longingness in your chest is about to burst, but you aren’t going to give in. You aren’t going to pick up the phone and give him the satisfaction of knowing that you desperately cannot live without him.
You can be strong for once. You can exist without Kim Taehyung.
Even though you don’t pick up or return any of his calls, that doesn’t stop him. It has already been almost a month since you last saw him, but he continues to call and call and call. He’s relentless and a part of you feels absolutely terrible.
In the second month, the calls are less frequent but still very present in your life. Tae still calls practically every day, leaving you those damn voicemails that break your soul. And as much as it hurts, you still listen to every voicemail. You don’t know why though because you still feel as shitty as ever.
By the third month, Tae only calls once, maybe twice, a week. You still give him props for being so driven. If it had been you in his position, you would’ve give up a long time ago. He leaves the occasional voicemail too, but you know better to not listen anymore.
Miraculously, you’ve managed to avoid seeing him all this time. You don’t really know how though, since you both live in the same city. But he hasn’t come to see you yet, which is surprising. This behavior was very un-Tae-like, but you’re thankful; if he was to show up at your door, you don’t know what you would do.
Without Taehyung present in your life, you didn’t know what to do with yourself at first. A person who was so essential to your being wasn’t there anymore. But after the days, weeks, and eventual months went by, you learn to just deal. Your co-workers were concerned at first—they didn’t know why you had suddenly changed. They questioned you a lot that first month and attempted to change your mood; it, however, died quickly when they realized you weren’t going to change.
But have you changed a lot?
You aren’t too sure.
The days continue to pass you by, and life is starting to get rather dull. It’s the same routine of waking up, going to work, and then coming home. Although it’s boring and less than interesting, you stick to it because it’s the right thing. And before you know it, six whole months go by and it’s almost the end of the year.
Life’s still boring, but you think about Taehyung a lot less now. He stopped calling after the fourth month and no longer consumed your every thought. You can breathe a little bit better now, but there are still some nights you laid awake wondering how he was doing. Knowing him, he’s probably doing great; Tae’s always able to adapt easily to situations.
With the end of the year approaching, you find yourself not to terribly excited about the holidays; after all, you’re going to spend them alone. Or so you thought.
“Hello?” It wasn’t Tae on the phone, but someone else who you haven’t spoken to in years.
“Hey, y/n.”
“Umm…hi?”
“You said your greetings already,” the person on the other line says, humor laced in their voice.
“Whatever,” you roll your eyes, “what do you want?”
They mock gasp, “Is that really the way to speak to someone you haven’t spoken to since high school?”
“I don’t know, Yoon; maybe because we haven’t talked since high school?”
“Goodness, no need to sound so sarcastic,” she says. “I was just saying.”
You have no idea why she’s suddenly calling after all these years. After high school, you haven’t kept up with anyone you used to talk to—besides Tae, of course. You’re surprised she still has your number.
“Like I said before, what do you want?” you ask, confused.
“Can’t I just randomly call you?”
“No,” is your immediate response.
“Look, y/n, I know we haven’t talked since high school, but we used to be really good friends,” Yoon says, “so I just wanted to call and invite you to a New Year’s Eve party I’m hosting at my boyfriend’s place.”
“A New Year’s Eve party?” This feels all too familiar.
“Yeah—it’ll be fun, so please come!”
You scrunch your brows, “Is it your same boyfriend from high school?”
“Oh god no,” she laughs. “I’m dating Jay now.”
In that moment, your mouth drops, “What?! As in, Jay from high school? As in, the Jay who hosted the best parties?”
“Yes, that Jay. We’ve been dating for a few years now,” Yoon explains.
“That’s so crazy,” you say. “Who would’ve guessed; but I’m glad you ended things with that boyfriend of yours from high school—he was a douchebag.”
Yoon laughs again, “You don’t even have to tell me; I don’t know what I saw in him.”
“Seriously,” you smile. “Especially that one time—”
“—he got so drunk the night before graduation, he received his diploma hungover and confessed he had a thing for a teacher,” she finishes for you and you both laugh so hard. You can’t remember the last time you laughed so much.
“Oh my god, that was ridiculous,” you say, recalling the memory.
“It’s really funny now, but I still cringe thinking about it sometimes.”
If you were her, you would cringe too, “Jay is totally a step up from that mess.”
“So you’ll come to the party?” she asks.
You shrug even though she can’t see you, “I guess so.”
“Great,” you can feel her smile.
“I mean, it’s not like I have anything better to do,” you tell her, and it was the truth—you really don’t have anything else planned. There’s no way in hell you’re going home to your parents for the holidays; without a doubt they’d ask about Taehyung and you aren’t exactly ready to tell them yet. Also, you’d probably run into his mom and that would be bad.
“I promise you won’t regret it.”
***
On Christmas day, you call your parents. They bombard you with the typical you should call more and come visit. You manage to avoid questions that are too personal and promise that you’ll visit…soon.
As you call the other important people in your life, including Yoon, your hands itch to call Tae. It was your first Christmas, since that trip to visit your aunt all those years ago, without him and it honestly feels weird. When you woke up this morning, your mind immediately flashed back to Christmases past where you always woke up beside him. The yearning you haven’t felt in a while starts to return, but you don’t press his number that you’ve never bothered to delete.
The days following Christmas are a blur as you wait for the 31st to arrive. Admittingly, you’re actually kind of excited for the party; it’s going to be your first social outing in a while. Yoon called and told you it was going to a dressy event, meaning nicer clothes, so you spent hours trying to find the perfect outfit. You don’t even know why you were freaking out about clothes, but you wanted to look nice.
You end up finding a burgundy dress with an exposed back that makes you feel really good, and you feel happy for the first time in forever.
When New Year’s Eve finally rolls around, you slip into your slightly scandalous dress ready to take on the world. Yoon sends you the address of the place and you drive for about thirty minutes before arriving at a mansion.
Of course, you think to yourself as you pull into the circle driveway. This dude would live in a mansion even as an adult.
At the steps of the mansion, a man stands there and you look at him puzzled. “Yes?”
“Hello, miss, we can take your car and park it for you,” he says and you realize this must be a really fancy event.
“Oh, okay,” you say and get out of the car.
“Just let Mr. Jay or one of our staff know when you’re ready to leave,” he tells you before zooming away in your car.
You turn around a few times in the driveway, not knowing what to make of the situation, before making your way up the steps of the lavish house. When you reach the door, you don’t even have to reach for the handle—it opens before you can.
“Y/n?” someone calls your name.
You smile, “Yoon.”
Your old childhood friend stands in front of you in a gold fitted dress, looking even better now than she did in high school.
“Oh my god—you’re so hot now what the fuck,” she practically screeches before tackling you in a hug. You can’t help but laugh at her action, before hugging her back. “How is this even possible?”
You pull away, “Look who’s talking.”
She rolls her eyes, “Compared to you, I’m a potato.”
“I mean, you managed to snag Jay so I highly doubt that,” you say to her, an eyebrow raised. “By the way, this place is huge.”
“Oh, I know. I told Jay it was too big but he said it was perfect,” Yoon shrugs.
You look around, taking in the elaborate décor and high ceilings. It was all beautiful, but a little too much room for your personal taste. “I mean, I guess it makes a good place to host parties?”
“That’s the plan now.”
As you continue to take in all the glorious details, you realize something, “Where is everyone?”
You look at Yoon, wondering if you were somehow early but that couldn’t be because you were on time…or at least, you thought you were. But your friend looks at your confused expression and smiles.
“It’s a big place, remember? The party is on the other side of the mansion,” she explains and in that moment, you can hear music emitting from somewhere far.
Yoon grabs your arms and you two make your way across the mansion. The deeper Yoon pulls you into the house, the louder the music gets. As the bass starts to shake the floor, you start seeing more people. Actually, you start seeing a lot of people.
“Oh shit,” you say to yourself, surprised by the sheer amount of bodies.
“I know,” your friend yells in front of you and you’re surprised that she heard you. “This is technically my party, but it seems like Jay ended up inviting the whole city.”
Although there are many people present, it’s not like a party you would’ve attended back in high school. No one is dancing provocatively or getting wasted—everyone is just doing their own thing. Yoon walks you into a room with high ceilings, a glittering chandelier right in the center. The extravagant sight parts your mouth in awe; exactly how rich is Jay?
“Well, this is the party,” Yoon says after you close your mouth again. “Before you leave, come find me okay?”
You nod a couples times before you register her words, “Wait, what?”
“I have to go find Jay,” she shrugs.
“And you’re just going to leave me?”
Yoon smiles, “You’ll be fine.”
“What was the point of inviting me if you’re not going to bother to entertain me?” you might’ve appeared rather sarcastic, but you’re internally freaking out. You don’t want Yoon to leave you; what are you supposed to do? This party’s not your forte and you don’t know anybody else but her.
“I’m sure you will find someone else to entertain you,” she says, already walking away from you. What was that supposed to mean?
And with that, your only friend at the party abandons you. Suddenly, you find yourself feeling out of place in the sea of people. You quickly walk away from the center of the room and don’t stop until you find a bar. You pour yourself a drink, half-leaning against the wall. As you glance around the room, you feel slightly envious of everyone. They all seem like they’re having a great time…and you’re not feeling that same excitement anymore. You are so immersed in your thoughts, you don’t even notice the figure behind you. And you definitely do not expect to feel a hand on you.
Out of instinct, you jab your arm into them; but they stop you, grabbing a hold of your hand. You turn around, ready to give them a piece of mind. But when you realize who is behind you, the world seems to stop.
“Wha—” your mouth falls open, not able to form proper words. “T-Tae?”
The last person you expected to see is inches away from you, and you can’t even think.
Your mind is completely blank, devoid of any thoughts as you search his features. Not much has changed about him—same curved lips, nose perfectly sculpted by God himself. If anything, he just looks tired. Tears threaten to spill when your eyes finally meet his; in his gaze, you see all the emotions you’ve felt these past six months. Confusion, pain, anger, numbness—you see it all and it kills you inside.
In your rationality, you thought he would be okay; you thought that he didn’t need you. Now, you see that he’s hurt, and you’re the cause of it all. Fear spikes your system. You need to get away from him before you cause any more damage. But as you try to back away, you realize that his grip on you is tight.
Without saying a word, he forcefully pulls you forward and drags you through the crowd of people. Thankfully, no one really pays you two attention as Tae maneuvers the both of you away from the center of the party. You have no idea where he’s taking you, but you don’t try to resist because there would be no point. Tae turns into a hallway and opens a random door, shoving you inside. He locks the door behind him, and finally turns to face you. You can’t even look at him, feeling shameful that you’re actually in his presence again.
Silence fills the room before he talks, “Why?”
You stare at the floor, not knowing what to say.
“Why?” he suddenly grabs both of your shoulders, shaking you. “Why did you leave me?”
You let him shake you, feeling deserving of the action; you deserved all the bad in the world for what you did.
“Did you not know how much of a mess I was, huh? I thought you were just mad at me; ignoring me for a couple days. But when you never called back, I didn’t know to do. Fuck,” he lets you go to rake a hand through his hair. “I was so angry. How could you do that to me? You ruined me, y/n. Why are you so heartless?”
By now, tears are pouring down your face; but you’re angry too. He was angry with you? He was a mess? “You think you’re the only one who was hurting?”
“Well, I wasn’t the one who completely cut you from my life.”
More tears spill from your eyes. He doesn’t get it. “You’re an asshole, Kim Taehyung.”
While he was angry that you didn’t return any of his damn phone calls in six months, you were disappointed that after all these years he still couldn’t see your true feelings. You might’ve not seem him in a while, but the same feelings from six months ago were starting to creep back and you didn’t like it. You have almost forgotten how much your soul longed for him.
“I’m an asshole?” he asks incredulously.
You don’t say anything; instead, you turn back around and start to walk towards the door. Before you can get far though, Tae pulls you back.
“Where do you think you’re going?”
“Away from you.”
“I haven’t seen you in six months and you want to leave already? Is that what you do best? Run away?” he asks.
His words are like a dagger to your heart. “Don’t ever talk to me again.”
“Why are you doing this, y/n? What the hell did I do?” he’s yelling at this point and the tears rush endlessly down your face. And before you can even help it, the words tumble right out of your mouth.
“You made me fall in love with you.”
The rooms falls silent and in that moment, you swear that you can hear Taehyung’s own heart beating. You can’t even look at him, feeling too embarrassed at your sudden confession. It’s the first time you’ve ever said the truth out loud; and even though you feel strangely liberated, a lingering feeling of rejection still harbors over you.
When the silence continues to swallow you up, you slowly start to regret ever saying anything.
“You know what? Forget I ever said anything,” you quickly say in attempts to clear the air. “I don’t even know why—”
“You’re in love with me?”
His words cause you to raise your head up and meet his eyes. There’s an emotion swirling in them that you can’t decipher. Since there’s no turning back now, you nod your head once and silent wait for his response. A few seconds pass before a smile morphs onto his face. The smile surprises you because you don’t get the gesture; why was he smiling?
“You’re in love with me?” he repeats his question, and you scrunch your brows as you nod your head again. “No, no—say it out loud.”
You blink a couple times, “Umm…I love you?”
“C’mon, say it more reassuringly.”
“I love you, Kim Taehyung,” you say with honesty because you do love him, you really do. The smile that graced his face a few seconds earlier is now a goofy grin that stretches from ear to ear. It’s a smile that scares you a bit because you still don’t understand the reason behind it.
“You,” he points in your direction before gesturing to himself, “love me.”
By this point, a string of laughter leaves you since he keeps repeating the same three words. “Yes I love you; why is that so unbelievable?”
“It’s not unbelievable,” he smirks and it is all so very Kim Taehyung. “But why did it take you so long to tell me? I mean, we’ve been friends forever.”
You slump against the wall, “And that is precisely the reason why. I-I didn’t want to ruin what we had already. You’re my best friend Tae, and I didn’t want to lose that. It also didn’t help that we were having sex together; I think that just made me fall harder, honestly.”
“I thought you wanted to keep it all no-strings-attached?”
“I did,” you sigh, “but it just all got so complicated.”
“Well, if it helps,” Tae starts, placing a hand along your cheek, “I’m in love with you too.”
He says it all so nonchalant that you barely catch the in love part. “You what?”
Tae looks down at you, now cupping both your cheeks, “I love you, y/n.”
“Are you just saying that because I confessed?” You’re in denial that Tae could be in love with you too because how can that even be? You were positive that he never saw you as more than a friend.
“Of course not; I think I’ve been in love with you since high school,” he admits, cheeks tinging a shade of red. “You were the cute girl in English class that all the boys liked, and I was just lucky to have gotten paired up with you on that project. When we became friends, it felt like a dream—I felt like I won the lottery. And because we were friends, I decided to suppress my feelings because you were important to me. But that winter break back in eleventh grade ruined me though. I have never regretted and cherished a night so much in my life.
“I figured I could live with simply being a friend who you fucked because I thought it was what you wanted. Now, however, I can see that we’ve been on the same boat all this time.”
When you hear his confession, you feel like so much heartbreak could’ve been prevented. “Why didn’t you tell me sooner?”
He shrugs, “The fear of rejection, I guess. Being friends with benefits was comfortable and I was fine with it, until you completely walked out of my life.”
“I’m sorry,” you tell him. “I thought that was best. I thought you could live without me.”
“I could never live without you,” Tae’s eyes widen. “I was a mess without you these last six months. I wouldn’t be here if it weren’t for Jay and Yoon.”
That’s when everything clicked, “You know Jay and Yoon?”
Tae smiles sheepishly, “Jay was a guy I used to hang with before I met you—our parents are friends. We haven’t talked in years and probably wouldn’t have if I hadn’t decided to go home to visit my parents.”
“You did what?” this news shocks you. “They didn’t…they didn’t ask about me, did they?”
“Don’t worry, I just lied and said you were busy,” he says and you can breathe again. “But anyway, when I went home Jay happened to be in town too and when we went out for drinks, everything just spilled out of me. He then told me that his girlfriend used to be one of your close friends and I begged her to get in touch with you. And, since you’re here…I guess she did.”
Wow. This is all so unexpected. “So, you all basically devised this party just so you could see me?”
Tae just nods and you roll your eyes before shoving him away from you. Taehyung looks at you like you’re crazy. “What the hell, y/n?”
“Why can’t you ever just grab my attention like a normal person?” you ask him, and a smile returns on his face. “Why do you always sneak up on me?”
“You’ve always be fun to mess with.”
As Tae smiles at you, you decide to be spontaneous. You take that chance to fling yourself into his arms, wrapping your own around him. Tae reciprocates the hug and lets his head fall into the crook of your shoulder. “I really am sorry and I really, really do love you.”
Even though you can’t see his face, you can feel him smiling into your shoulder. “I know and I love you more.”
“I don’t think that’s possible,” you tell him, smiling.
He raises his head, “I’ve loved you longer, idiot.”
“So? Time doesn’t determine the strength of someone’s love.”
“Yes, it does, because I loved you first.”
“No, it doesn’t because I loved you so much I was willing to let you be happy.”
“I love you more,” he says.
“No, I do.”
“I do.”
“Tae, I love you more—” before you can continue to express how much more you love him, he shuts you up with a kiss. You haven’t kissed him in so long, you can feel your head spinning. As his lips move against yours, you feel desires that you thought died start to come alive again. You mold yourself closer to him, needing to feel him against you.
You pull away from him and he moves down your neck, “Since you claim you love me more, you should show me just how much…”
He raises his lips of your skin immediately, “Oh yeah?”
Smiling, you nod and laugh when he picks you up. He walks you two to the bed in the room and throws you on it before climbing on top as well.
“I feel kind of bad for always using people’s bedrooms,” you say as he starts to unzip your dress.
“I guess it’s just our thing,” Taehyung smiles at you before leaning in for another kiss.
Our thing. You repeat the word in your head, and you swear you’ve never been happier.
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levis-hazelnut · 3 years
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Summary: when you and your best friend, Hanji, were younger, you had made up stories about your dream guys - what they would look like and how you would meet. What happens when the one you had made up appears to be real?
Warning(s): suggestions of sex. please do tell me if there are anymore.
Taglist (closed): @castellandiangelo @fandom-addict19​ @20coldhearts​
Status: completed
part 10 > part 11 > part 12 (final)
series masterlist
(a/n: sorry this is me just being thirsty for levi, it’s completely self indulgent and barely has a plot)
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I think what I’m about to tell you right now is probably one of the biggest surprises.
So, you know how both of my relationships never lasted longer than five months? Well, my relationship with Levi has been going on for eleven months now. Almost a whole year. Which means I’ve been living in heaven for the past eleven months.
This man is just amazing in every way possible (but please don’t tell him I said this because he’s going to piss me off). He can pretend that he doesn’t care about anything all he wants because I know how much of a sweetheart he actually is, and I hate him for making me fall even more in love with him.
And another reason why I hate him is because--
That god awful sound of my ringtone screamed into my ear and I knew who it was, seeing as how there was only one person who would call me at eight a.m. on a Saturday.
With a few grumbled curses, I blindly reached for my phone and answered it, “What?”
“Good morning to you, too, darlin’.”
“For god’s sake, just tell me what you want. I’m trying to sleep.”
“I’d like for you to get your ass out of bed since our exam starts in less than twenty minutes.”
... Wasn’t it the weekend?
“... Excuse me? Exam? Since when?”
“Look at your calendar, please, you idiot.”
“I may or may not have put it into my calendar because I relied on you,” I muttered, jumping out of bed and scrambling to find some clothes before quickly brushing my teeth and trying to fix my bed head.
“Also, stop by at the café before you come. I want tea.”
“Are you fucking dumb? I’m not stopping to get you tea when I’ll already be late.”
“It’s on the way. It’ll only add a couple of minutes to your journey.”
“If I’m late, I swear I’m going to--”
“It won’t be my fault if you’re late. Thank you for getting me tea. Love you. Bye.”
He cut the phone before I could even reply and I rolled my eyes, slamming the apartment door behind me as I rushed down the stairs and made my way to the café to get Levi his precious tea since I’m such a loving girlfriend.
With a shrill ring of the bell above the door, my arrival was announced as I looked to the counter to see Eren talking to Levi, with a cup of tea in his hands.
I frowned, marching towards them to slap the back of the raven’s head.
“What the hell?” he spat, flicking my forehead in retaliation.
“What happened to getting you tea, so I can be late to the exam?”
“There is no exam, darlin’.”
“What do you mean? Why did you tell me that there was an exam? Why would you make me lose precious hours of sleep?”
“Seeing as how you don’t remember, I’ll remind you. Last night you asked me to help you study. For the exams. But I didn’t think you’d get out of bed for our study session.”
“Stop knowing me so well and let me sleep. Now, you have to buy me a cof--” I cut myself off when he presented a hot cup to me and the aroma of coffee wafted around my nose, calming me down after I took a sip. “Thank you, babe.”
“You’re welcome,” he replied before turning to the male with turquoise orbs. “Thanks for the drinks.”
“No problem. I also cleared a table in the corner for you guys, so that you wouldn’t get too distracted.”
“Aw, thank you, Eren,” I grinned. “Come on, let’s get this shit over with,” I huffed, dragging the raven towards the table, where we both sat down, and he took things out of his bag before tucking it under the table.
“What do you want to focus on?” he asked, and then glancing at me when I didn’t respond because I was too busy focusing on the black t-shirt he was wearing. Perfectly fitted around his arms, tight around his torso and pecs, exposing the ripples that I love to run my fingers over. And he was wearing a couple of silver rings on his hands, and I didn’t think he’d be able to look more attractive.
“... You,” I replied to his question with a smirk, causing him to roll his eyes.
“I will walk out of this café if you don’t stop staring at me like a freaking weirdo and if you don’t pay attention to what I’m saying.”
“But I’m tired,” I whined, facepalming the table.
“That’s not my fault.”
“I will fucking kill you, Levi. You were the one that decided to call me for five hours last night. And the one who thought it’d be a wonderful idea to wake me up at eight in the morning.”
“... Fine. We don’t have to start straight away,” he told me, leaning back in his chair and crossing his arms over his chest, causing his biceps to bulge even more.
“Don’t sit like that.”
“Why?” he questioned, raising a single brow.
“Because I’m sure you don’t want to get fucked in a café.”
“Why are you always so horny, you freak?”
“You’re asking me that question while looking like that?” I scoffed with the roll of my eyes. “The audacity.”
“Just drink your coffee before it gets cold.”
“I will. By the way, do we have to stay in here? Can we go to the library or somewhere quieter?”
“Why? So you can fuck me?”
“No, you idiot. I just won’t be able to concentrate with all these people.”
“But you’ll get too sleepy if it’s quiet.”
“True,” I mumbled. “Okay, then. Just give me like half an hour and I should be ready to study.”
“What am I going to do for thirty minutes?”
“Maybe talk to your girlfriend, smartass,” I retorted, laying my head on the table again, squishing my cheek against it. There was no response, so the only sounds were the chatter of customers, glass clinking, and air conditioning because of the sweltering weather. I glanced at my boyfriend, wondering why he was silent, only to find that he was gazing at me. “You okay?”
“Mhm,” was his reply, which was unusual, before he took a sip of his tea.
“What are you thinking about?”
“About how we ended up here. Together. In a relationship.”
A tender smile conquered my lips as I reached my hand out for his, interlocking our fingers. “Thank you, Levi. For loving me like no one else did. And no matter how much you get on my nerves, I’m always going to appreciate you being here for me.”
“I’m not good with this shit, so yeah, same thing goes to you,” he said awkwardly, causing me to laugh.
“Can’t believe it’s going to be our one-year anniversary in about two weeks.”
“Going to be a year since I entered hell.”
“Shut up,” I muttered, kicking his shin, despite knowing he was joking.
“... You know what, let’s just go,” the raven-haired male randomly stated, standing up and gently tugging on my hand as our fingers were still intertwined. To my one-word question of: “Where?” he replied, “I don’t know, but I don’t feel like it’s day that we should study. We have plenty of time for that, so let’s do something.”
My hues shone brightly as I grinned and gladly accepted his offer, getting out of my seat and grabbing my coffee as he packed his things away prior to leading me out of the stuffy building, bidding farewell to Eren.
“Let’s go to your place. We’ll make breakfast, have it on the balcony, and do whatever after.”
“'Kay, then. But can we slip in a nap after breakfast because I’m still tired?” I requested.
“Of course.”
So, we made way to mine and Hanji’s apartment, relieved that I didn’t have to study all day today and could simply relax with the raven. That fact made me smile a little as I unlocked the door to the apartment, stepping inside and kicking my shoes off as Levi did the same, following you to your bedroom.
“Ten minutes, please. Then, we begin our date,” I sighed, plopping down onto my bed and he made himself comfortable, shifting my head onto his lap. Then, his slender digits began to soothingly drift through my tresses that were completely tangled, so he had gently unknotted my hair to make it easier to run his fingers through it.
“Remind me to never wake you up this early on a weekend again.”
“I always tell you, asshole. And you never listen to me.”
“Well, I’ve finally learnt my lesson. So, hush.”
After my ten-minute rest, I went to splash my face with water to wake me up a little, while Levi was in the kitchen, preparing everything for breakfast, seeing as how the only thing he ate for breakfast was tea and toast, and I only had coffee.
“Hey, darlin’, what do you want to eat?”
“Mmm, maybe crepes... Let me help.”
So, in the next forty minutes, I ended up with flour on my face and clothes, while that idiot was just smirking at me, and I had slipped because there was water on the floor. And all of it was amusing to my boyfriend, who seemed to be in a great mood since he kept chuckling (not that I was complaining because it was a beautiful sound). The annoying thing, though, was that I was too irritated to mock him wearing my floral apron that made him lose his debonair flair.
“You’re an idiot with her own comedy show,” he teased.
“I don’t know if that is a compliment or not.”
“It isn’t. I’m calling you an idiot.”
“Shut up. You’re the reason I’m covered in flour.”
“Just go sit down and eat. I’ll clean everything up.”
“You better, you clean-freak,” I mumbled, doing as he said, taking a seat at the table on the balcony as he placed down the plates and mugs before sitting opposite me. The sun grinned down on him, giving him an ethereal appearance and making him even more gorgeous. 
There was idle chatter as we ate because I was too exhausted and agitated to carry a proper conversation that had too much information for my brain to register.
Once we were done, the raven stood up to take the dishes to the kitchen and wash them (husband material right there) as Hanji approached me with a yawn, rubbing the fatigue from her eyes.
“How come you’re awake so e-- Oh,” she said when she noticed Levi.
“Yeah, he made me get out of bed early for no reason,” I complained as I stood up to help him. “There’s leftover batter for crepes, by the way.”
“Oh, okay. Thanks. Also, why is there flour everywhere?”
“Because of that idiot.” I rolled my eyes.
“You’re the idiot, darlin’,” he called from the kitchen before appearing before us, shooting an annoying and teasing look my way, and shot him a glare in return.
 From someone else’s perspective that don’t know us, we’d probably look like we hate each other, when in reality, this was basically our love language - annoying each other and glaring.
“I will punch you, Ackerman. However, I need to clean up, so you’re lucky.”
“Not like you would’ve, anyway. And before you say anything else, just go shower.”
Once again, I rolled my eyes but left the room to do as he said, grabbing some clothes and a towel before going into the bathroom. Just as I was about to close the door, however, it opened slightly and Levi stepped inside, shutting and locking the door.
“What are you doing?” I inquired.
“I said I’ll clean everything up, didn’t I? That includes you,” he whispered with a smirk, leaning in to latch his lips onto mine, tugging at the hem of my shirt.
~/~
Soft kisses were pressed along my hairline and my forehead, my cheeks, my nose, down to my jaw and further down to my shoulders. Lips continued to migrate, travelling to my neck where there were soft nibbles and flicks of a tongue against the flesh of my neck.
My fingers were tangled in ebony locks, damp and fragrant from our recent shower, and my nails gently scratched against Levi’s scalp as I drifted my hand through his hair. His touches were light and almost careful, like he didn’t want to hurt me, even though his teeth contrasted that when he sunk his teeth into my skin a couple of times before kissing the spot he bit as a wordless apology.
We were simply lying down in my bed, relaxing in a comfortable silence. I laid on my back with my eyes lidded, while Levi laid on his side, resting his head on my chest as he continued to pepper my skin in soft kisses and gentle nips.
These would always be my favourite moments. Just moments filled with adoration, silent declarations of love, and serenity. No teasing, annoying, or glaring. No retorts, no eye rolling, no grumbles. Only warmth, tenderness, affection.
“Darlin’?” he uttered in a hushed voice, but when I didn’t respond, he lifted his head to gaze at me, finding that I had fallen asleep. His ashen hues were full of fondness, admiring my relaxed visage before he pecked my lips and assumed his original position - his head on my chest and an arm slung over my torso.
While I was asleep, he was on his phone, scrolling through social media, occasionally sighing because he was bored. But he wouldn’t wake me up because I deserved to sleep.
It wasn’t until about twelve o’clock when I woke up with Levi’s head still laying on my chest, however, his grey orbs were hidden. So, with little movement, I attempted to reach for my phone, only to find that his fingers were entangled with mine, which made me smile softly because I hadn’t been holding his hand before I fell asleep.
And when I pressed my lips against his knuckles, his eyes fluttered open to meet mine, and there was a smile shimmering in his beautiful eyes.
“Finally awake, sleepyhead,” he hummed placing a single kiss on my jaw.
“Mhm. Did you miss me?” I murmured, unhinging my jaw and letting out a yawn.
He scoffed and rolled his eyes, putting up an act to support his lie. “No.”
I giggled softly, kissing his forehead. “Whatever you say, babe. Anyway, what are we doing for the rest of the day?”
“I was thinking something outside because the weather’s nice.”
“Oh, I know! There’s a funfair at the park just ten minutes away. Let’s go there.”
“Sure. We’ll leave in about an hour?” he suggested, and I hummed in agreement, tugging my boyfriend closer so I could nuzzle my face into his chest before we got out of bed. “Then, we can come back later and make dinner together.”
“That sounds nice,” I said in a hushed voice, feeling sleep taking over me once again. However, Levi attempted to save me before I completely gave in.
“Don’t fall asleep.”
“Shhh.”
For the umpteenth time that day, the raven rolled his eyes but he couldn’t help the smile that edged onto his lips every time.
He doesn’t know what it was. But every time I would do or say something, even if it was the most stupid and idiotic thing he’s seen, he feels something warm flutter inside. And he realises how much he’s fallen for me, which has changed him. In a good way.
And all this time I thought I was a bad influence.
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