#but yknow how it is no one reads 90 pages quickly | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

booksncoffee · 7 years ago

Text

how you get the boy - thirteen

“If you’re a good friend then you probably know that I lo-“

“-love Louis, I know.” He finished off my sentence before cracking a telling smile and giving my shoulder a squeeze. I could sense that he was about to say something I wouldn't like and I was right. “But feelings can change, Tee.”

read below // story page

If I didn't know Harry better, I would say that he was avoiding me, for it had been three days since the incident in the hallway and yet, I hadn’t seen him at all after that despite the fact that we lived just next door. Or despite the fact that we had always bumped into each other before, but now all of sudden, it seemed as though he never left his flat and I was beginning to wonder if he really did live in this building.

Unfortunately, that wasn't the case because I did know Harry enough to know that it wasn't him who’s avoiding me; it was me who’s avoiding him.

See, steering clear of Harry wasn't exactly part of my plan, but when it’s the only thing I knew seeing that it’s one of the fewer things I was good at, that’s exactly what I found myself doing.

I didn't realise that I had been missing my trip to The Cup every morning for the past three days until Niall casually brought up his name in our conversation.

As much as I hated to admit it, I could still clearly remember the dejection etched on his face as he glanced at us before he stepped inside and hard as I tried, I couldn't quite erase it from my memory. Not even the memory of Louis’ lips pressed against mine or his fingers digging into my skin could help bury the image of those stupid, stupid, beautiful green eyes that taunted me every night, that appeared behind my eyelids each time I closed them.

‘It was just your bloody imagination, Tee’ had become my mantra. Nevertheless, I was aware that I was just fooling myself because no matter how convincing I sounded in my head, I knew that if it were an imagination, I wouldn't be able to conjure it up, wouldn't be able to see it clearly as though I’d seen it with my own eyes. I did, I did, I did, and I couldn't banish it from my thoughts.

“Tee, I know you’re shite at confrontation,” Niall stated, his accusation pulling me out of my reverie, to which I immediately smacked his head, emitting a yelp from him. Rubbing the sore spot, he then rolled his eyes at me and continued his interrupted speech. “But yknow, you should give it a try. Who knows it might work. In fact, ‘m positive it’ll solve 90% of your bleeding dilemmas.”

“That’s not true,” I crinkled my nose at him despite the fact that it was true. But having someone else point out a fact about yourself – one that you refused to acknowledge, especially – wasn't exactly in the list of the things that I enjoyed in life. I chose to deny it until I made everyone around me including myself believed that little lie. “I do enjoy confrontation. And where’d you get the statistics?”

Niall let out a loud scoff, causing some people that were browsing through the records to glance at us, as he quirked an eyebrow at me and gave me a look that said he didn't trust me. “Tee, we all know that’s bullshit.”

“No s’not,” I shook my head, crossing my arms in front of my chest whilst a pout made an appearance on my chapped lips. “Just because you’ve never seen me confronting anyone doesn't mean it’s bullshit, Ni.” I continued with my head held high, to which he simply chuckled instead of taking me seriously.

In my head, I was already strangling him and making him choke on his chuckle because damn it, I hated that sound so much when it’s directed at me. Fortunately for me, it did stop after a few seconds even though it seemed as if it wouldn't. I would’ve been more glad if he were to remain quiet but that was just too much to ask, wasn't it?

“’Kay let’s see if you’re telling the truth, yeah?” Niall suddenly mentioned as the corners of his lips were tugged upwards into that devilish smirk I knew very well and hated with every fibre of my being. “He’s here.”

Before I got the chance to let the word ‘what’ leave my lips, the bell above the door jingled, producing a sound that signalled that someone had just walked in and my eyes widened in horror as realisation dawned on me. I looked around the store in an attempt to search for the nearest hiding spot but when my eyes landed on the cash register, I realised that it was too late to hide behind it now because Niall was already calling out Harry’s name, telling the bloke to come over to us.

That wasn't the only thing I realised, no, I also realised that I did avoid confrontation and Niall’s smirk was all the confirmation I needed to know that I would be getting shit from him for the rest of my life because of this.

Bollocks.

Flabbergasted, I glanced through my shoulder just in time to see Harry’s smile as well as his face dropped upon seeing me and I felt a pang of sadness hitting me. Granted that, I quickly disregarded it and focused on the anger I felt towards Niall that was growing by each seconds that passed. I really wished I could strangle him the way I did in my head a couple of seconds ago and get away with it.

I should’ve known that when Niall told me over the phone that he wanted me to come over to the record store he was working at, he was up to something because he’d never asked me to visit him at work before. It had slipped his mouth once before that he didn't like it when I came to the record store, said I always managed to cause a scene whenever I turned up and so, I chose not to come over anymore unless I really needed something from the store.

Well, this time, it was on him if I were to cause a scene because he’d just dragged me into a hole I didn't dig.

“Hey, mate,” Harry said once he’d reached us, his smile reappearing as his gaze landed on Niall. It didn't go unnoticed by me that he was making sure that there was a gap between us as he stood closer to Niall, arms crossing in front of chest like he was trying to protect himself from something. “Everything’s alright?”

Niall nodded his head, his devilish smirk never leaving his peachy thin lips. It took everything in me not to elbow him so hard until it left bruise, but somehow I managed to control the urge by clenching my fist. “The record you’re asking for is here.”

His serious feature morphed into one that displayed delight upon hearing that and I found myself basking in the warmth of his smile and the little dents of delight that appeared at the corner of his lips. Before he could notice that I was staring at him, I blinked my eyes once, twice and looked away, pretending as though I hadn’t just thought about his dimples and how much I wanted to drown in them.

“It did?” Harry asked, breaking the silence between the three of us and Niall nodded his head before he excused himself to go and get the vinyl from the backroom.

As soon as he left the two of us standing awkwardly by the vinyl section, I realised that Niall had just pushed me into the hole he had dug for me. Clenching and unclenching my fist, my eyes darted from Harry’s face to the floor, as I wasn't sure if I should be the one to start the conversation. After ten seconds of debating with myself, I decided to keep quiet and wait until Niall retur-

“How’re you, Harry?” I asked before I got the chance to stop the words from rolling off of my tongue. Mentally, I had already slapped myself over ten times.

Apparently, it wasn't just me who’s taken aback by the question that had just slipped past my lips; Harry was too. It was evident in his face that he hadn’t expected me to say a word to him and I understood that. In fact, if I were him, I’d be surprised too. Especially after the shameful things I’d done.

“’m alright, I guess,” he answered with a shrug, uncertainty – that was never there before – settling over his voice. He scratched his jaw twice and rubbed the back of his neck once before he asked me, “How ‘bout you?”

“Great, yeah,” I nodded as I pulled my bottom lip between my teeth and chewed on it. My gaze followed his eyes that drifted down to my lips for a couple of seconds before they returned to my eyes and he cracked a small smile, an insincere one at that.

“Date with Louis went well, I suppose?” There was a hint of bitterness in his deep voice and I chose not to obsess over it until I was alone later.

Instead, I shrugged, opting for the indifference act I had perfected over the past few months. “Yeah, it did.”

Harry hummed his response as he pinched his bottom lip between his fingers, eyes scanning my face like he was hoping that he could detect a lie. He couldn't, because the date was good; in fact, it was probably the best one I’d gone to. Dropping his hand to his side, he then opened his mouth to speak, “That’s good.”

The awkwardness was palpable – that much I knew – and it didn't take a genius to figure out that Harry had something else to say, that there’s more to his ‘that’s good’. However, before I could point that out, Niall returned from the backroom with the vinyl he was talking about. There’s a bounce in his steps and a smirk on his face as he made his way to us, to which I simply scoffed to myself. He must have thought that Harry and I had sorted our shits out.

“Here ya go, H,” Niall handed Harry the vinyl that he accepted with a huge smile adorning his face and I tried to catch a peek at it. Paul Simon. I’d say I wasn't surprised, but I was, for I’d never pegged him as someone who listened to songs like Graceland. “Took me weeks to get that! Bloody Arnold wouldn't let me get a hold on it until yesterday. Said he didn't trust me with this or summat. Real pain in the arse, that one.”

At that, laughter tumbled off Harry’s lips and it was the music to my ears. “Thanks, mate,” he said once his laughter had died down, waving the record in front of his face, “Really appreciate it.”

“S’nothing,” he said dismissively before he added jokingly, “you paid me, remember?”

I felt as though I shouldn't be here, shouldn't be standing between two blokes who were far taller than me and listening to their conversation. My presence was not needed and therefore, I decided to leave the record store and return to my flat instead.

I didn't get to do so, however, because I’d only managed to take two steps before I felt Niall’s fingers wrapped around my forearm, tugging at me and pulling me back to him.

“You busy tonight, H?” Niall asked as he pulled me to his side, draping his arm over my shoulder so I wouldn't be able to leave. Arsehole. “Think we should go to Vortex tonight. Been a while, don’t ya think?”

Since I was standing close to Niall, I took that as a chance to nudge him in the rib with my pointy elbow – that’s what I’d been told by Shiloh – and smirked when he winced in pain.

“It’s been a while, yeah, but I’ve, erm, got things to do tonight,” Harry answered whilst rubbing the back of his neck and shifting from one foot to another. “Sorry, mate.”

Niall scoffed, “No need to apologise, H. Guess it’ll just be me and Tee tonight.”

“How ‘bout Louis, yeah? Bet he can come with you?” Harry said, though it didn't come out as a statement, as he glanced at me for a couple of seconds, something that I couldn't quite perceive flashing in his eyes. Then, he looked at Niall and hitched his thumb towards the exit before either of us could answer his question that didn't quite need an answer. “Anyway, I’ve gotta run to The Cup now. Thanks again for this, Ni.”

The blond haired bloke waved him off and once Harry was completely out of our sight, Niall turned to me, brows furrowing in confusion. I could see the cogs turning above his head and I waited for him to say something. When he didn't, I nudged him once more, emitting another yelp from him.

“Stop that, will you?” Niall groaned as he rubbed the spot below his rib, “They’re gonna leave bruises.”

“Whatever, Ni,” I rolled my eyes, “What’re you thinking so hard about anyway?”

Then the contemplating look returned. He scratched his eyebrow whilst his eyes darted from the big window that overlooked the street then to me, “H told me yesterday that he has a day off today.”

For the first few minutes, I shrugged off that piece of information because it was useless, because why would I want to know if he had a day off or not if I didn't even go to The Cup anymore. Having said that, somehow it was when I was making my way back to my flat that I realised that maybe, just maybe Harry was avoiding me too. Which explained the lie he made up about having to be elsewhere when he didn't have to, when he could’ve just stayed with us.

Louis returned to the flat twenty minutes after I did.

“Niall told me you’re going to Vortex tonight?” Louis questioned as he occupied the empty spot next to me on the couch and wrapped an arm around my shoulder. Pulling me closer to him, he planted a kiss on my forehead and I rested my head on his chest, inhaling the faint smell of his cologne.

Ever since the kiss we had after the date, nothing more than harmless kisses on the cheeks or forehead – sometimes a peck on the lips – and cuddles on the couch in front of the television happened. It was as though we were both skirting around the edges, both unsure where to go from there.

Thus, we decided to settle on going back to the way we were. Except, we’re allowed to hold each other’s hands or kissed each other’s lips whenever we wanted to. I’d never had the boldness to do the latter somehow. It had always been him who’d initiate a kiss on the lips, which never lasted for more than five seconds.

“Yeah,” I mumbled against the material of his t-shirt and focused on the sound of his steady heartbeat as opposed to mine that was beating wildly against my chest, “I don’t think ‘m going.”

“No, no,” Louis disagreed and I removed my head from his chest and knitted my eyebrows together as I looked at him, “I specifically remember Niall telling me that if you said you wanna back out of this night out, I have to persuade you to go.”

“He did, really?” I wasn't surprised because that did sound like something Niall would say, but still. That bastard. “How exactly are you gonna persuade me, Lou?”

Louis pursed his mouth in a smug smirk and he patted my knee before he heaved himself off the couch, glancing at me through his shoulder. “By coming with you and making sure that you’re not getting out of this.”

Then, he disappeared into his room, giving me no choice but to get up from my comfortable spot on the couch and made my way to my room where I, once again, stressed over what I was going to wear. Whilst staring at the clothes I had hung in the wardrobe, I heard the soft sound of a familiar music playing through the thin wall of my room and next thing I knew, I found my feet shuffling towards the source of the sound.

I pressed my ear against the wall.

Marvin Gaye was playing and I smiled to myself; he’d never failed to surprise me with his choice of music. Come to think of it, he’d never failed to surprise me with anything.

The second that thought came into my mind, I brushed it off and returned to my wardrobe where I picked the first thing my eyes landed on: the black dress I wore on Harry’s birthday. I remembered the smirk that graced his lips when he not-so-subtly checked me out, remembered what went down by the end of the night.

Shit.

Why everything that crossed my mind today seemed to lead back to Harry, I hadn’t a clue. And I hated it, hated the knowledge of him occupying every crevice of my mind so much. I blamed the brief conversation we had earlier for making me think of him, but then again, he had already been in my mind before Niall tricked me into coming to the record store when he knew Harry was coming over as well.

“Fuck me,” Louis said under his breath, but I heard it – of course I did – and I glanced through my shoulder to see him standing in front of my doorway. One hand stuffed in the pocket of his black skinny jeans, he brought another one hand up to his jaw and rubbed it thoughtfully as he looked at me. “You look smashing, Tee.”

“Thanks,” I replied sheepishly. Tucking a strand of hair behind my ear, I made a move to grab my jacket and put it on, worried that the weather would only get colder by the end of the night or morning – depending on when we decided to leave Vortex. After making sure that I’d taken everything with me – my mobile phone, my key and my money – I made my way to Louis and smiled when the familiar scent of his cologne hit my senses. “We should go before Niall starts calling me.”

Louis mumbled something about me being right as he stepped aside and let me step out of the room. I looked at him. He was shaking his head like he was trying to shake off whatever thought he had in his mind and I ignored the rush I felt running through my vein when our shoulders brushed.

Instead, I focused on getting my steps right so I wouldn't fall on my arse and embarrass myself. Louis pushed my hand away before I could reach for the knob and opened the front door for us. He was so adamant about this whole ‘ladies first’ thing and I found it quite endearing.

Come to think of it, I’d always found anything he did endearing.

Like how he opened the car door for me and did a little bow before I climbed in or like how he would increase the volume of the radio when his favourite song came on the radio – but lower it quickly when he heard me saying something – or like how he placed his palm on the small of my back if we were to walk next to each other; the list was endless.

It wasn't until we’d arrived at Vortex that I realised I’d missed out one thing that I found the most endearing about Louis. How he entwined our fingers, making sure that I stayed close to him as we walked into the club like he was trying to protect me from all these drunken people. The music inside of Vortex was so loud – louder than any other days – to which I actually winced when the sound hit my eardrums. Louis gave my hand a reassuring squeeze and I relaxed a bit until we met up with Niall who’s already saved a few seats for us.

“Hiya Tee!” Liam exclaimed rather excitedly when he spotted me and I could only assume that he was already drunk because one, he’d never greeted me like that and two, he’d never winked at me like he just did two seconds ago. “I see that you came with Louis.”

Although Vortex was considerably dark, they must have seen red leaked into my cheeks as I nervously smiled and bit my lip as Louis moved from standing behind me to smack Liam, to which they both ended up laughing when Liam nearly fell off his chair. Niall, on the other hand, rolled his eyes. I’d say that he wasn't exactly enthusiastic about Louis and I, but I paid no attention to it.

“Are you two together or summat?” Liam questioned next with a kink of his eyebrows. At that, Niall scrunched his nose and I blamed his expression for my hasty answer.

“No,” I answered much too quickly and I cursed to myself, wishing that I could slap a hand over my mouth. I could feel Louis tensing up slightly behind me and I glanced through my shoulder to see that instead of having a frown adorning his forehead, he was shooting a smile at me and the tense dissipated when I returned his smile. Relieved, I turned back to Liam and continued, “No, we’re not.”

“Shame,” he muttered under his breath before he brought the glass up to his lips and took a swig of the liquor. “You two would look good together, I reckon.”

In front of me, I could see that Niall was holding back his snort and I couldn't help but wonder why he seemed so snarky tonight. Hence, I kicked his foot under the table, urging him to look at me. “Ni, could you come with me to the bar?” When I saw that his lips were forming the syllable ‘no’, I kicked his foot again, to which he groaned and agreed reluctantly.

Once I was sure that Louis and Liam wouldn't see or hear us, I stopped Niall in his tracks and squinted my eyes at him as I tried to scan his face. When his feature, gave nothing away, I asked, “Okay, what’s wrong with you?”

He shrugged half-heartedly, eyes avoiding my gaze, “Dunno what you’re talking about.”

“Bullshit.” I pointed out as I crossed my arms in front of my chest, “Ni, in case you’ve forgotten, I know you just as well as you know me. So, what is it?”

Niall gave a sideway glance before he ran his fingers through his hair and let out a heavy, weighted sigh. “This is stupid but I just.. Jo and I haven’t talked since our date.”

“What-Why?”

“Dunno,” He shrugged again and this time he ran a hand down his face whilst a muffled groan left his throat, “She said she’ll text me the next morning but it’s been, what, a week?”

Eyebrows knitted together, I tried to remember the day Niall and I went to the cupcake shop where he scored himself a date with Jo, whereas I got a box of cupcakes that I brought to Harry’s flat when I returned home later.

It had been a week.

“And she hasn't texted you?”

“No,” he shook his head, his glum expression making its return on his face. Although every now and then I enjoyed making Niall’s life miserable, right now, I wished I could wipe the sadness off of his face. Wished his eyes would light up with the usual cheekiness instead. Sighing, his hand drifted into his pocket, “S’pose she doesn't like me.”

“I doubt that,” I said, confidence lilting my voice. I was 100% positive that she liked him; I’d seen the secret smile she had on her face when she looked at him. And I was certain the smile was reserved for Niall and only Niall. “Don’t you think that maybe she’s scared to text you first?”

“Why’d she be scared?” Niall asked, his face etched with confusion, to which I told him that I would be scared to text a bloke first and that he should probably text her first. “Right, you’re right, Tee.”

“I know I’m right,” I replied with a smug grin adorning my lips, bumping his shoulder with mine. “Is that the only reason why you rolled your eyes at Louis and I just now?”

“I did, didn't I?” He smirked innocently and I punched his arm twice – he really was asking for it today. “Dunno, Tee, I don’t like seeing you and Louis, I guess?”

Brows furrowing, I shoved him once more because there’s absolutely no reason for his dislike towards Louis or towards me or towards the two of us. As far as I was concerned, none of us hated one another. “Why?”

“’Cos Harry likes you, Tee,” He gave me a pointed look as though I should be able to figure that out myself.

“Wha- how’d you know? Did he tell you?”

“He didn't have to, I knew.” Bloody liar. Niall wasn't that good at perceiving things; at least not on this matter. No one knew about Harry and I. I was pretty certain that this piece of information must have slipped past Harry’s lips whilst they were conversing over the phone – or whilst they were out, God knew when – and Niall, being a quite good listener that he was, must have questioned his friend about us. Must have gotten all the information he needed from the bloke. “I know a lot of things about you two, Tee.”

I rolled my eyes and snorted. “What are you? A mind reader? A stalker?”

“I’m a good friend, that's what I am.” He answered with head held high, chin jutted out and I had to resist the urge to punch his arm again. Or rather, punch his face. It’s enough that I’d left some bruises on his body when I elbowed him earlier today.

“If you’re a good friend then you probably know that I lo-“

We – Louis and I – ended up leaving Vortex an hour later. Initially, I wanted to leave the place alone but Louis didn't think it’s safe for me to take the cab alone and so, he decided to come home with me as well. Niall wasn't too happy with my decision, though, but with Liam keeping him companied for the rest of the night, he had no reason to stop me from leaving.

The question of whether I was okay or not left Louis’ lips every five minutes and each time it did, I lied to him and told him that I was just tired.

Truth was, after what Niall said to me, I couldn't stop thinking about it, couldn't stop wondering if feelings really could change – in my case, that is – because I had grown so used to the idea that my feelings for Louis would be the one thing that was constant in my life. But I couldn't tell him that. So I told him that I was tired and sleep was all I needed.

After pressing a kiss on my forehead and wishing me goodnight, we went into our rooms. I locked the door though I rarely did that before – I’d always liked to leave the door slightly open – and let out a long sigh when my eyes landed on my bed. I wasn't lying, after all, I was tired.

As soon as I had washed my face, brushed my teeth and changed into something more comfortable, I fell asleep when my head hit the pillow. I was sure that I could’ve gotten a good night sleep, very sure until I wasn't anymore.

At around 2.30 in the morning, I heard a loud thump against my wall. It was so loud to the point that it jolted me awake. I wouldn't have a problem falling back to sleep if the sound didn't return.

But it did.

And that was how I found myself lying awake in my bed, eyes shooting murderous glare at the ceiling above me as I pressed the pillow against my ears. It didn't mute the sound, however; I could still hear the faint sound of it and it drove me crazy. Crazy enough for me to drag my heavy limbs out of my bed and out of my room. I didn't even bother to make sure that I looked presentable before I made a beeline to the front door and surprisingly, without bumping into anything and without making any loud noises and waking Louis up, I managed to get myself out of the flat.

My bare feet supposedly had a mind of their own as they navigated me to his flat and it wasn’t until I was standing in front of Harry’s door, my knuckle only an inch away from the door, that a pang of conscience hit me and I felt as though I was finally fully awake.

I was bloody standing in front of Harry’s flat, ready to stop him from having sex with whoever that was, at 3 in the morning in nothing but my sleeping outfit. I blinked my eyes once, twice, as I dropped my hand to my side and cursed under my breath. I didn't know what had gotten me, but I knew for sure that I was ashamed of myself for thinking that I had the right to come here and tell him off.

He could do whatever he wanted and who was I to stop him?

Therefore, with those words being repeated in my head again and again, I returned to my room and got under the sheet. My speeding heartbeat refused to calm down and with each thump I heard, my heartbeat only increased and I could feel something running through my vein, something foreign. Then there’s that bitter taste on my tongue and even as I had swallowed it down, it remained there until the sun came up and it was time for me to leave the comfort of my bed.

I blamed the lack of sleep and the exhaustion, of course, for my behaviour four hours later.

“You forgot the bloody syrup, how could you forget it?” I normally wouldn't snap over small matter like this – one thing I was proud of myself – but I was exhausted and I was quite sure that this headache was going to kill me if I didn't consume caffeine as soon as possible.

The girl – who looked slightly younger than me – winced at the way I spoke to her, muttering her apologies to me and I wished I could feel sorry for her, but I couldn't. Not right now, at least; I might feel terrible about this later once I no longer felt like there’s tons of bricks on my shoulders and like the sky was falling down on me.

Then his smooth yet raspy voice pulled me back to earth and reminded me that my world hadn’t ended yet. Thank God.

“Let me do that,” he said softly before telling the girl to go back to the counter and take the order instead. “You scared the piss out of the poor new kid.”

He didn't even look at me when he said that, so I leant forward and watched as he made my coffee from the scratch, “She’s new?”

“Mhmm,” he hummed as he made a move to pour the caramel syrup in my drink whilst a small smirk tugging at his lips. He must have heard what I said earlier. “Bad day, huh?”

“Yeah, I didn't get laid last night.” I huffed and as soon as those words left my lips, I wished I could take them back. I hadn’t meant to sound bitter, hadn’t meant to bring up what happened at 3 in the morning and I sure as hell hadn’t meant to let him know that I’d heard him. Loud and clear.

His green eyes were intense for a couple of seconds as they looked at me and my thoughts ran wild at the sight of that. He coughed into his fist and ran his fingers through his hair before he walked over to the new kid and said something her. Next thing I knew, he was standing next to me, his warmth radiating off of his body and I found myself savouring it until he opened his mouth and told me that ‘we should probably talk.’ Then it was coldness that I felt.

“So last night-“

“You said you have things to do,” I interfered before he got the opportunity to finish his sentence, feeling my nose flared up from the pent up anger, which I didn't even know where it came from. “Was getting laid one of the things you needed to do?”

Harry’s jaw dropped open for a fraction, though, I had to admit that he was quick to mask his feature with indifference. Bet he learned that from me. “That.. Why’d you care about that, bun- Tenley?”

“I didn’t,” I answered a bit too quickly and I could only hope that he didn't hear the lie in my voice, didn't notice the way I faltered when the word rolled off of my tongue. “But I did lose my sleep because of the thumping noise.”

“You wanna talk about losing sleep?” He quirked an eyebrow at me, a mechanical laugh leaving his throat and I frowned at him, wondering where he’s going with this. “Tenley, I couldn't fucking sleep after seeing you with Louis. I couldn't get the image of him kissing you out of my head and I can’t get the image of you enjoying the kiss so much out of my head and it drives me mental, alright?”

The revelation rendered me speechless and for a solid minute, I felt sorry for him for losing sleep over me. But then I remembered. Remembered the reason why we’re having this talk. “So you decided to screw some girl and torture me with the sound of her moan instead? The sound of the two of you going at it?”

His brows descended into a frown and he pinched his bottom lip between his fingers as he bought himself some time. “I didn't think you’d be awake,” he murmured and his voice was so slow that those words almost didn't reach my ears.

“Well, I was and have been since then,” I replied, bitterness creeping its way into my voice, to which he frowned at me.

“Tenley, what’d you feel if you told someone that you like him and then two nights later, you found him kissing another girl?”

I crossed my arms in front of my chest – the coffee he’d prepared for me long forgotten – as I tried to make sense of his question. “What does this have to do with our conversation?”

He shook his head and shrugged. “I thought since you told me what put you in a bad mood, why not I tell you mine as well?”

He was being sarcastic, I was pretty sure of that, so I decided to do the same. “I wouldn't take the first girl I found at the pub to my bed, that’s for sure.”

Harry was great at composing himself, I noticed, for his feature didn't change at all once he heard my reply. And if I weren’t too consumed by my anger towards him at the moment, I would’ve said that I admire his ability to get control of himself. Unlike me who was now clenching and unclenching my fist underneath the table and to stop myself from saying more stupid things, I brought the paper cup up to my lips and took a sip of the coffee.

Every five seconds my eyes would dart to him and I would look away instantly when he glanced at me. I hated seeing the creases between his brows. Wished I could make it disappear with my fingertips. I couldn’t because it wasn't my place to do that and I wouldn't because.. Well, I couldn't think of the reason why I wouldn't want to smoothen the lines between his brows. But I knew I would figure it out later.

“It just doesn't make sense, you know,” he said all of sudden, breaking the silence that was looming over us with his raspy voice. I looked up and saw that he was already looking at me, his green eyes scrutinising my face like this was the last time he’d be able to truly look me in the eyes.

“What?” I asked, scared. Scared to hear what he had to say. Scared that my voice would give away the thoughts running wild in my mind.

He ran his tongue over his lower lip and pulled it between his teeth, releasing it as he released the breath he was holding. “That Louis starts liking you when I am falling for you.”

Five minutes of silence passed between us and I still didn't speak, but I was looking at Harry and I realised that things would never be the same between us anymore. And I despised the knowledge so much because I didn't know what to do with it. So I did what I did best. I stood up from the chair and left The Cup without saying another word.

#1dff #harry styles fanfiction #louis tomlinson fanfiction #hygtb #hygtb13 #there ya go friends #let me know what you think!!#:)

29 notes · View notes