#but yk. applicable relatable etc

[sneindeer]

i need to go precisely because its so scary. but im scared T-T

[aromantisk-fagforening]

Lovejoy's new single: call me what you want

Review? Thoughts? Analysis?

Table of contents:

how it literallly sounds (review/similar to)

Some of the lyrics and my thoughts kinda

Theme/topic/similar songs

personal thoughts/questions/criticism

Sorry English is not my first language and I don't often formally analyze songs (and never in English).

You may notice several parts have "similar songs" and that is in part because what I do most with songs is make playlists with songs that are similar and discover new music.

Musically it's really fun. The singing is a bit rambly like a crywank song (especially the bridge) and the rest reminds me of James Marriott's music. The drums sound cool (like always). Also the el-guitar, the el-guitar sounds pretty cool (it is that right?).

Some of the lyrics (via genius):

I never was a fan of the internet She never felt that safe in her own head We both hate the news

The news can be negative, I'm very good at analysis (sorry lol).

You can call me what you like As long as you call me

This is the title. I really do like this actually. I can relate this to anytime anyone has ghosted me or been unavailable for calls or I've been lonely (then directed at anyone). Also "you can call me what you like" as a thing is funny for me because I really enjoy a lot of my nicknames, and being called something different than your name can often make you feel connected to people, at least for me. One example could be from that one film "get in loser we're going shopping", that probably made that friend who was called "loser" feel good and like they were on good terms, yk?

But you can't stay awake forever No, you can't stay awake forever

I wanna stay awake forever. Or really really not. Love hearing someone else talk about it, even if the context isn't the same.

I'm not paranoid, I'm a realist I know you're gonna kill me

No cause paranoia can be so real sometimes. Fuck paranoia. I don't have a big paranoia problem, but when I have many issues piling it does occur yk. Also, "you're gonna kill me" can mean emotional death too if you want, and that's pretty applicable to a lot of stuff (school, politics, friends, etc etc).

Theme/subject/motive/motif/topic:

The song is mainly about insecurity in a relationship. It also talks about paranoia, cheating, "[her] kissing the skin under [his] lips" - which I don't really understand (like is that a thing? what does the average person think about that?).

It reminds me of Mr. Brightside, because of the way the jealousy is written. The description of what she's doing (kissing people). Also Wallow's Drunk on Halloween, with the wondering if a partner is thinking about other people. I'm sure there are hundreds of songs about these topics. I should mention tfb's Legit Tatto Gun because according to Genius the song might be making a reference to it. I'm also reminded of tfb's Lipstick Covered Magnet because of the desperation and like kinda "anything is ok" mentality (though I think that one is more about abuse in relationships, idk).

Things I don't personally enjoy/understand (personally):

I've had too many arguments over having critisisms of things that aren't necesserily flaws, but mostly personal preference and therefore I'm just disclaiming that this is my opinions and thoughts and questions. This is me relating this song to my own life, goals, insecurities and how much I'll listen to or enjoy it.

Basically, if you have any thoughts on any of this that aren't just "let people enjoy things" or "not everyone is like you" my ears are open, I like talking about music. (can you tell I've been hurt before lol).

I was surprised to hear christian lyrics ("the feel of grace of God goes you"). I'm an atheist, and even as a person living in a majority (protestant) christian country I do not understand the meaning really. I checked genius, but I'm still confused (anyone is invited to tell me what he's talking about btw).

One thing this song does is use the whole "I hope I'm the only one she'll see tonight" which to me seems overdone, but probably mostly because I'm (non-amorous) aromantic. The line kinda makes it difficult to relate to non-romantic contexts or non-interpersonal stuff. Also it makes it difficult to relate it to a polyamorous context, not that that's something I do especially often (though it can be fun).

[jonathankatwhatever]

I just cursed at you. Why? Noon and a fucking 5 hour time difference. Midnights, indeed. That’s been sitting there like a ripe fruit, a 5 and 7 and a 12, like two primes adding to an even, which invokes the next count, which is to 8 and 1 or 13. And from there, the edges get complicated because there are so many combinations.

I read something that mentioned Ramsey numbers and I guess it colonized my brain.

I kept hearing weird stuff about money while I was walking. Really couldn’t make sense of it because I just don’t want to think about it, either for me or my family. The best I could see is that this informs a deeper area, which is the kind of thing I’ve been trying to make rigorous. That is, it points not in the direction of something else, but to the ring of things which includes ‘this’ and better answers that define what this measured is. I’m not trying to be obscure, but a bunch of mathematical concepts have been filling in, and I’m talking about a distance from an origin, meaning application of Hexagonal and of the bip in a gs as representing the origin of the Hexagonal. Have we covered that? I don’t remember, so let’s do it again: Hexagonal is a gs, and you can see it as a box, but it also represents the compression of szK and of the real, meaning xK and yK, which is necessary to make the complex space, to make the baubles which are topological and other spaces. It’s very cool to see we can generate all those kinds of spaces. I mean we haven’t done it for each kind, but it can be done because it’s translation, not creation.

So, there’s a metric which extends from the origin, and that links the connected ideas. So, this is a way of reaching the ring, not the best answer, the deepest meaning of the ring. That’s an important point for a lot of things, like psychology and sociology. It can enable a mapping, like the way kids are taught to build idea webs, and that can be used to identify and treat mental conditions. Interactive mental health. Now, that’s a business opportunity, but not a short-term project.

I also heard more than saw that CR operates within the next Dimensional Enclosure. And I literally just heard: and that’s why the counting occurs at the 2nd level, at 6-8-10 rather than the primitive 3-4-5. It’s SBE2, and SBE2 means you count back over as one of the options, as opposed to a count back of 1-0-1, which is internal. In other words, SBE2 counts back over a string, thread or chain, which means it also counts back internally, which means literally when it breaks to 1’s and thus 0’s. Can’t have higher counts if you don’t have the 1’s and 0’s. So, at 6-8-10, we have chain counts, and that invokes higher chain counts, etc. This means 100 is within a DE of 400, like on the drawing.

That 400 is szK, which is turned at an angle to xyK. The picture is weird to draw because szK are angled away from gs ideal. That might be the hook. I hope so, because I was suddenly thrown into an entirely different space. Coming back to the idea, counting SBE2, translates the count along the hypotenuse, when it counts 1Segments, as another space which encloses the primitive space and lower moduli of that space. And that is always true of triples. But what I really want to say is that each of the triples relates to the fundamental or basic gs, that these 1Space forms are versions where szK are 1Segments, and it is that process which forms the enclosures. That is, a gs generates as a form out of bT and fD and the I//I process which relates the Irreducibles. That means the hypotenuse, which is irrational, is a gs process, meaning it exists in the tension necessary for the processes to identify the hypotenuse of a gs as a root2 in the ideal. So one process necessary to have any irrational is for there to be not only rational but integer relationships, such as triples. That actually makes sense. It took a lot to accept it.

And that fills in a huge chunk because now we have a construction, like a 3 by 4 rectangle which has 2 right triangles (in either view), which is 12gs, which means each is generated by I//I, which means the hypotenuse generates a square of 25 for each side of both sK and zK for a total of 100, which connects to the next level of 6-8-10, which is 100 to 400, etc.

And that of course makes the 4 triangles whose defining lines now look like 1-0Segments which collect and count the attached dimensionality. I can see a couple of ways to CR this. One is to rotate around the midpoint and then slide to the edge, to the left and up, for example. The other is simpler: pin the one, like zK, to the lower left (since that’s the drawing) and rotate the layer to the edge. That makes the next L-count, which at primitive is a one gs ‘thick’ enclosure. It becomes 2 because that makes obvious you match the a and b flips, and at 6-8-10 there is a 2gs enclosure, and so a 2gs enclosure completes the triple because that allows Dimensional Shuffling within. Note how similar Dimensional Shuffling is to shuffling cards. Think about how that changes or makes a game.

And this connects to group actions in some way because we don’t see all the Coordinate Rotations, just the 1Space existences which occur in and through triples. That really gets at the heart of something we’ve been trying to get out for a long time, that groups are CR’s without the intervening steps, that they reduce the visible to 1Space manipulations. That simple line involved a massive understanding curve which involved a huge amount of anxiety.

Well, it’s noon, I mean midnight, and I need some sleep. This work takes a lot of mental energy. I had to walk for over 2 hours to burn the physical energy so I could continue. I practiced holding myself at the lower core as has been developing. I have to remind myself to allow this process to stand and lift me when I’m stopped at a light or to look at you on my phone.

[studium-stardust-reblogs]

my advice will be to start with the very basic stuff first and then move on to the more complicated stuff. here are a few things you can keep in mind :

for sets and relations and functions, remember the definitions. first and foremost understand the difference between relations and functions and only then move on to the other definitions. this is not very hard. doesn't require much practice either atleast not at school level.

for trigonometry, keep a separate list of all the identities. and develop of habit of writing which identity is being used at which step while doing a question. this way by the time your exam approaches you will have mostly memorized the identities.

for the trigo chapter, it will definitely take a while to get the hand of it. cause there are so many identities and there is no fixed way. but once you get it, its actually the simplest of all. since this requires the most practice, i would suggest you do this at the very beginning.

for limits, basic calculus and logs practice is your best friend. try to do different kind of questions. if you don't have time to do the entire ncert, then do the examples only + some questions. also, there are online calculators with steps available for all these topics so if you don't understand something use an online calculator. but don't leave it in the middle.

basic calculus involves differentiation? if it does remember the basic rules (yk derivative of trigonometric functions, logx, product rule, quotient rule, etc). also if it's a test, you won't get koi basic function. rather you will get something which requires the application of chain rule. so, try and understand that perfectly.

straight lines and circles are typical topics. again, keep a separate sheet where you can write all the formulas and stuff. while attempting these questions, make sure to write what information is already given and what needs to be found. this way, connecting the two will be easier and you can figure out which formula to apply.

mathematical reasoning isn't that hard or important, i mean i think i skipped it entirely, do a few questions you will be good to go.

Thank you so much!!

[cancerbiophd]

Hi Julia! Sorry if this seems like a lot, but I hope you don't mind me asking. To contextualize: I’m about to graduate with a BA in Bio! I was initially pre-med for ~3 years of undergrad, but I realized I didn't have a strong interest in being an MD. Bc of multiple reasons (in part, a lot of anxiety), I hadn't gotten much extracurricular/lab experience in that time. After tons of (painful :() introspection, I want to go for a grad program after my gap year - (1/3)

but I wasn’t able to get into a lab this year (bc 4th yr, yk? :(). The most ��lab” experience I’d gotten was taking some upper level Bio classes. I’m worried about my chances of even landing a lab tech (or related) position to get experience before the next application cycle. I could take multiple gap years, but I’m not sure if I’ll have stable housing or be able to find a job in my hometown. If it’s worth mentioning, I’ve been a TA for a lab course, done some work as a grader, and have GREATLY improved my grades, but compared to my peers it feels like… not much. The profs I’m close with seem to think I’ll still be just fine, but people advise doing much more than I did (which is completely understandable). I guess I’m just stuck and frustrated w/ myself that I hadn’t done anything sooner. Do you have any advice on how to move from here? Thank you so much! 

Hi anon!!! 

Firstly, I want to congratulate you on graduating!!! (they really should just combine the words and make it “Congraduations!” lol anyway) no but seriously, you got a BA to your name now!! Feels good yall. 

Secondly, I was in the same! exact! boat! omg. you sure you’re not me from like 8 years ago? Because I also went into undergrad focused on pre-med, decided nope not for me, realized I wanted to go into grad school, but didn’t have a lot of lab experience (bc I had no idea where to start or what to do). I managed to squeeze in 1 semester of volunteering in a lab before graduating, but I knew that really wasn’t enough. It then took me 5 tedious months of searching before I landed a lab tech job that gave me the experience I needed (and also guided me towards my current field of cancer bio). 

Just like you I was super bummed that I didn’t discover sooner in my college career what the right path was, but I was elated that I at least did discover the right path. What’s that one saying... the best time to plant a tree was 10 years ago; the next best time to plant a tree is today. So take a deep breath, get back up, and tell that little voice in your head that you don’t have the time and energy to feel frustrated because this is the beginning of a new chapter, and you are gonna work hard for it, starting today! 

Keep up the search for an entry-level position at a research lab (such as a lab tech). Along with checking the regular job posting sites (like Craigslist and Monster), also look for temp agencies, and seek out newly established labs (eg. PIs who just moved to your local research univ– they’ll be needing a lab tech real bad and they probably have boat-loads of money as a new recruit. That’s how I found my lab tech job). 

Here’s a post I made regarding cold-emailing PIs to see if they’re hiring (and not all of them post positions online; sometimes they find the person they want to hire first, and then post the position to make it official with the university. Something to keep in mind!)

Here’s a masterpost of links to job websites specifically for scientists (hopefully the links still work; I haven’t checked in a while)

Another option, if you’re up for it, could be to move to a different location that would have more job opportunities for your field. For example, Seattle and California are some hotspots for biotech. Recently there was one cancer immunotherapy start-up in Seattle that was hiring 50 scientist positions at once. Check out Boston University’s Biomedical Workforce Data Report to see where the potential hotspots are in the US.

You can also acquire other related non-lab (but still paid) experiences, such as becoming a biology tutor and freelance science writer. 

Utilize your network. Ask your friends, family, past professors, college alumni, etc if they know of anyone working at a place that could hire you. Someone could know someone who knows someone! Before I landed my lab tech job, a friend of a friend of my mom’s had offered me an internship position at her research institution in Florida. 

If your goal is a PhD, you can consider doing a Masters first to gain more experience. I know many colleagues in the life sciences who did a Masters first as a “stepping stone” towards their PhD, and typically Masters programs are more lenient on requiring lots of lab experience. I have a post here about the pros and cons of doing a Masters before a PhD (US centric). 

Other things that can ramp up your application include acing the GRE (general) and GRE Biology Subject Test (if that’s the grad field you want to pursue). I know of one student in our pharmacology/toxicology PhD program who had very little lab experience but still got in because one PI in particular was super impressed with his perfect GRE score. Some really amazing letters of rec and a killer personal statement will also help.

I hope that helps a bit. I’m always here to chat if you have other questions or just need someone :) I’ve definitely been in your same exact boat, so I know what you’re going through. It wasn’t easy or fun in the slightest bit, but I got through it, and I know you can too

[narcocultures-blog]

Things to Do Immediately About SARMs

SARMs, or Selective Androgen Receptor Modulators, are performance enhancing drugs that don’t have the same effects as steroids. They are claimed to have not as many side effects as steroids, but with this said, they haven’t been tested as much as typical steroids.

Although, SARMs are different than steroids, they do have amazing results for people who are looking for the ways to grow their muscles. As they do not work on the whole body, instead they target on the one specific pathway like - towards the muscle growth or to lose the access fat present in the body.

SARMs have some side effects but when it comes to comparison with the steroids, they are a lot safer and will help you grow your muscles helps you to get the desired body structure.

It is said that due to the fact that SARMs have special affinity strictly for muscle and bone tissue, they do not affect prostate, liver, or brain (which is main problem with steroids). Therefore, they are much safer than anything else that is as effective.

There are different varieties of SARMs available in the market intended for mass enhancement, endurance, etc. Users claim that SARMs don’t really affect endocrine system, and you do not need post-cycle therapy (this is a big plus).

Where to Buy SARMs?

Though the Internet is filled with SARM vendors, one of the biggest troubles that customers have to go through when buying it is quality. Finding a reputable seller is crucial and a tough nut to crack.

With SARMS, due to lack of research and short time-span since they came up, the amount of fake or untested product is high. Regular users and the little amount of research suggests that you shouldn’t take SARMs which aren’t at least 98% pure.

The dearth of quality articles on SARMs, plus the crap all over the Internet makes it difficult to find a trustworthy vendor. Hence, we recommend that you do your research on trusted sites such as Narco Culture and other similar sites.

Depending on your personal requirement, you can select from a variety of SARMs. Let’s provide you a quick run-down of some of the most commonly used SARMs.

LGD 4033 Ligandrol review

You might have already heard about Ligandrol! It’s quite a trending topic these days.

Ligandrol, also known as LGD 4033 or Anabolicum is one of the strongest Selective Androgen Receptor Modulator (SARM). It has gained quite a reputation among bodybuilders, athletes, powerlifters, and runners.

Ligandrol is considered as an excellent supplement for those who are looking to reduce fat and gain lean mass. It is being studied to treat conditions such as muscle wasting linked with acute and chronic diseases, age-related muscle loss, Osteoporosis and cancer.

It works in the same way as other SARM’s: by selectively activating androgen receptors to promote anabolic activity exclusively in muscle and bone.

Since its initial discovery, two phases of clinical trials have been completed to study the application of LGD-4033 for muscle and bone growth. Read more about the trials.

Ligandrol Dosage

If you are going to be using it for the first time, start experimenting with 5mgs a day. Hundreds of Ligandrol reviews of users reported that consumption of anything between 5 to 10mgs works great for building lean muscles and strength.

Expert users on multiple forums recommend using LGD-4033 for at least 6 to 8 weeks.

Ligandrol Effects

Multiple benefits have been observed in both initial studies and user-reported reviews of LGD-4033 (Ligandrol) use.

Primarily, it helps increase lean muscles. It also prevents the breakdown of muscles while increasing metabolism. it is being studied to prevent and treat caxechia, sarcopenia, osteoporosis and older individuals recovering from hip fractures.

LGD-4033 (Ligandrol) may improve strength and stamina. Users have noted an increase in muscle strength and stamina while cycling Ligandrol, which correlates with the increase in lean muscle mass seen in studies.

It boosts mental well-being. Many users have reported feeling positive, strong and a sense of ‘alpha’ when taking Ligandrol.

The most common side effects are headaches, nausea, water retention and fatigue. Keep in mind that some test subjects tend to be quite paranoid. It is hard to say if the side effects are because of the LGD-4033 as the amount of duplicate SARMs on the Internet is high.

Best SARM Stacks for Mass

Some people use only a single kind of SARM for usual results and some athletes use multiple SARMs simultaneously to experiments with the results and more effective results. This is known as SARM stacking and as long as stacking is carried out in a controlled manner, the results can be quiet rewarding.

Depending on your aim, below mentioned are some of the Best SARM stacks:

For Fat Loss and Cutting

The best SARMs for cutting and fat loss are:

· Ostarine (MK-2866)

· Cardarine (GW-501516)

· 10 mg Cardarine and 20 mg Ostarine each day for 10 weeks

· Followed by a break of four weeks

For Mass

The best SARM stacks to bulk up and build mass at a fast pace are mentioned below:

· Ligandrol (LGD-4033)

· Testolone (RAD-140)

· The dose of 10-15 mg each day for eight weeks

· Followed by a break of four weeks

· SARMs PCT should be used in between cycles

Read more about SARMs Stacks for Mass on https://narcoculture.com/best-sarms-stack/.

For Strength

The best SARM stack for building strength includes YK-11 SARM:

· Lingadrol (LGD-4033)

· YK-11

· Dosage of 10 mg YK-11 and 20 mg Lingadrol per day for six weeks

· Followed by a break of four weeks

· SARMs PCT should be used in between cycles

SARMs are pharmaceutical products which are used to shed fat, build muscle rapidly, increased strength and toning. While consuming SARMs, full attention should be paid to the prescribed cycles and courses of SARMs.

Do your research, read as many user reviews as you can find, and make an informed decision to get the most of your SARM stack.

[phe-purple-parade-ts]

Sanders sides dance headcanons because uhh yeah why not idk

Remus: twerks and just generally does all the raunchy and/or fad moves (still bustin' out the whip & naenae to this day)

Roman: uhh p much everything, our boi loves them arts after all. But I feel like musical theatre choreo and waltz (for that Disney Prince Elegance) could be his faves. Perhaps also some Latin styles like uh rumba? Salsa? Idk all that much about dance tbh lmao why am I making these hcs I need research for this but we're relying on my personal experience, childhood love of dance-related media, and my recent reread of 'Sesuji o Pin!' so.. yeah

Patton: obvs dad dancing (the sprinkler, the fishing line, all those fun ones) but also line dances and fun fast social dances like Lindy Hop uuuuuhhhh because I say so

Logan: the robot but also smth classy and structured like the waltz idk. Probs also some hiphop, like break-dancing or smth (bc it goes w rap and also he'd appreciate the Physics application)

Janus: tango. Yeah that works. Ik you're imagining like a roceit tango or smth c'mon. Maybe foxtrot? Idk just cool classy smooth ballroom dances with some edge to them - some overlap w Ro & Lo here

Virgil: see this is the tough one. He'd mostly prefer just kinda standing there and nodding his head or smth - yk, the energy-conserving, drink in hand, not-rly-dancing party dance. He doesn't rly know how to dance??? He can headbang or like jump around in a mosh pit maybe but.. choreography?? Uhhhh......

He'd probably be dragged into joining in w the others, especially with dances like Patton's where they're pretty casual/beginner friendly. He doesn't mind (:

Maybe some urban dancing like Lo? Idk

Oh yeah he'd do meme moves actually yeah that works

And maybe he could tango w Janus and Roman idk afsjfkpfpl

They'd all join in on Patton's line dances n stuff

Ro usually acts disgusted by Re's moves (siblings amirite) but also they definitely had a twerk-off one time and it was. V awkward for the others to see lmao

Ig Pat & the twins would dance lotsa swing dance etc together 'cause they have the most energy lol

Catch them swapping partners in & out like my friend & I saw that one group of four do at a swing dance party (they were iconic honestly)

Pat loves the Shim-sham because I say so (it's my swing dance friend's favourite & I also like it v much). He tries teaching the others to varying levels of success lol but it's all for fun and they usually have a good time together

Logan likes to properly study choreography before fully executing it - a side'll teach him a move & he'll go practice it etc for the next time. He needs it to be shown a certain way tho, trying to reverse-mirror it ain't gonna work

Virgil can get kinda nervous/frustrated by some tricky moves, but it's ag in the end

Remus just goes for it man lol he has no fear of potential accidental contortionism he's good to go

Janus manages to bs his way thru dances he hasn't actually learnt, kinda annoying tbh ahem

Ro,, ro will dance anywhere anytime he's the dancing queen okay??

Pat might get a move the wrong way round or miss a step or whatever but it doesn't really matter! As long as they're having a good time and no one's hurt, he's happy to, carefree, just boogie on down

[echodarkly]

1. We’re a system of walk-in afterlifers! We don’t have like, portals or anything, but people just show up / leave in one way or another rather than splitting / combining. We don’t care about why our system formed in the slightest!

2. That got a little tricky to answer recently, haha. At base we have about 11 or so permanent residents, but then a bunch of “temps” who come and go. Some temps front daily, others only show up internally every couple months. Where it gets particularly difficult is the ShLA SubSys, which due to some semantics either only counts as one headmate or counts as theoretically infinite due to its nature of being an entire dimension. We usually put the count at about 18 total.

3. Nearly two years now (Anniversary is in February), though we had suspicions a while longer

5. We thought that DID was the only way to be plural for a while so went “hmm if headmate=DID and Us=Headmate, then DID=Us” which was Not Fun for the whole thinking we’re faking thing lemme tell ya

6. Yes, half of us all it headspace half of us call it mindscape. Its based on a minecraft world Its a large mansion and a lake in the middle of a clearing surrounded by forrest then mountains. A while ago the headspace decided it wanted to be evil and introjected(??) the Darkwood (yk from the game) to replace 3/4 of the forest, which was also Not Fun for a while.

7. Headmates, people (with context), others, friend (usually referring to a newbie), just calling them by name

8. We do use the word system but have an insatiable need to have multiple names for everything so we also use “house” and “collective”

9. Elemental resistance (Only slightly a joke, some of us (shaela) just dont get cold the way the rest of us do), hugs (/int), company, all the basic stuff like always having someone with you

10. Accidentally cutting yourself off from the system :( the first couple months were rough bc of the whole “faking” thing

11. We largely dont use a psychological view of it anymore, but i wouldnt really call it spiritual either. The closest we’d get is the fact that our headspace is technically the afterlife, but usually we justa say it like it is (to us).

12. We usually say switching. At first we didnt really notice when we did, but as we get more stressed its gotten consistently more noticeable rather than just having the odd jarring switch. We dont usually have much control, but going through doorways/transitions usually causes one. Recently we’ve been better at getting specific people

13. The majority of us are one big polycule, itself containing several types of relationships. Mae is all of our child, Tick has some kind of romantic relationship with nearly everyone applicable (ie right age, allo, not - yk - related), darkly and tick are twins, cal and tick are brothers, shaela and lausey have a qpr (as do several others), and thats not even mentioning our partner system

14. We were out to exactly one(1) person IRL and they turned out to be plural as well, so they went from our partner to our partner system

15. We dont take intentional forms, but the majority of us are humanoid. Our System Admin does age slide a little (from young adult to teen), and Lausey is uhhhh amorphous

16. We all share hyperfixations, so minecraft mainly, but we have a wide variety of individual interests that we share to some degree, like analogue horror, the occult, crochet, Doom, biology, etc

17. Pretty good!

18. Just everything. All. Every genre of music. We have a few collective favourites though, like our favourite animal is the hyena and colour is garnet red. Rowans favourite song is PYRO, Tick’s is Internet Ruined Me, Shaela’s is Oak and Ash and Thorn (or Ship in a Bottle, which is a Very System song)

19. We no longer have an original, and we don’t like the term host. We have a “most frequent fronter” which is usually Tick but is more based on who fronted for the longest time the past week so can change for a short while.

20. Our partner system!!!! We have several members who mirror each others archetypes, so Tick and Bones get along really well.

21. Its so much better now. Before we’d get the idea that somethings up but’d brush it off for next year every time. Now we can also get people who like what we’re doing to front rather than relying on it happening automatically.

22. We didnt, but we did accidentally-on-purpose make Miette (no we didnt choose the name) who really really helps by being completely immune to executive dysfunction, even if getting her to front takes continuous conscious effort

23. a lot of things dont really matter. why we formed doesnt affect the fact that we’re here now. how many fictives we do or dont have doesnt affect the fact we exist.

24. Man, if youre confused just ask. like. systems are people, and a lot of them would rather you ask them if youre confused rather than avoid interacting with them.

Sysmeds should not get to write the narrative about us on this platform!

Scrolling through the tags, it seems like a great deal of what's said about us on tumblr is either sysmeds trying to make us look bad or all-encompassing plural blogs that just say everyone is valid (which is great! and these blogs should keep doing what they're doing! but it would be nice to have some more frequent endo (and other) representation on here too!)

Either my tumblr algorithm just sucks major balls, or most endos, tulpas, spiritual systems and other non-sysmed-approved systems get scared off of this platform because of how many loud hateful voices there are compared to how few people there are who we can relate to. (like most of the cool-looking accounts i can relate to that i find are dead and so is my blog for the same reason lol).

SO! Let's do a thing. If you are endogenic, parogenic, a tulpamancy system, a spiritual system, a daemien, or any other kind of system that sysmeds try to silence, reblog this post with answers to these questions to tell tumblr what our lived experiences as plurals are REALLY like!

(Feel free to pick and choose which questions you want to answer, or just come up with your own and tag them under #endovoices or substitute endo for whatever kind of system you are! Also, feel free to just reblog with one answer at a time, or to just answer the questions in a standalone post; no need to credit me, I just want more systems sharing their experiences!)

1. What kind of system are you? (Describe this in any way you like. No need to use -genic or popular terms if you don't want to)

2. How many of you are there?

3. How long have you known about your plurality?

4. What kind of spaces/communities do you/did you hang out in? (Both plural-relevant and non-plural-relevant spaces are valid answers, past and present)

5. Had you heard of DID/OSDD/DDNOS before you became plural/discovered your plurality?

6. Do you have a wonderland/innerworld? If so, what do you call it, and what are some things that you and your system members do there?

7. What do you call your system members?

8. If you're plural but don't use the word "system" to describe you&, what word do you use?

9. What are some of the best things about being plural?

10. What are some of the not-so-great things about being plural? (Any answer is valid- nothing is too minor or too major to be an answer to this question.)

11. Do you have a spiritual or psychological view of your plurality?

12. Do you ever experience "switching" or "posession" or any sort of change in who controls the body? If so, what do you call it, how easy/difficult is it, and what is it like? Were you always able to do this, or did you have to learn how over time?

13. How do you and your system mates relate to each other? (Are you friends, family, romantically involved, caretakers, etc.)

14. Have you come out to anybody in real life/in a singlet space about your plurality? How did it go?

15. What kinds of forms and appearances do your system members take on?

16. What are you and your system members interested in?

17. What is your life like in the meatworld?

18. What are your music tastes? Movies? Favorite colors? Animals? List any other favorites as well

19. Does your system have a host/original? If so, what do you call them? Explain what role they play in your system

20. Do any system members have notable relationships outside of the system? Explain them!

21. If you haven't been plural for your entire life/haven't known about your plurality until later in life: what was life like before plurality compared to life now?

22. If you chose to become plural: why? What has changed since then?

23. Is there anything you'd like to say to the plural community at large?

24. Is there anything you'd like to say to any singlets reading this post?

That is all I've got for now, but feel free to add any more you want to share! Please remember to be respectful to all system types if you post, I do not support bashing or invalidating of any system types. I will also reblog with my own answers soon.

(Note: these questions are not in order of priority or importance, I just wrote them down as I came up with them. Feel free to answer out of order and skip or add whatever you want!)

Also this should go without saying but making any rude sysmeddy responses to this will just result in being blocked and totally ignored, so don't even start, there's no point. The block button is right there.

Have fun everyone!

[jonathankatwhatever]

Added: I checked this and I believe we got it.

——

I need to sit my butt down and … focus.

That isn’t easy when my thoughts are fragmented.

Regarding the prime number theorem, today’s AMT showed me a linkage. The distribution of primes approaches n/ln(n) because that is the modular form of the underlying complex relation we’ve described in which the count is 1 + 1, when one of those 1’s is divided into n pieces, and each count of 1+1 is thus factored into n pieces. This hits 0 when the complexity disappears, and this at prime values because then what is visible is the gs primes count, which occurs in the x,yK quadrant grid in which the s,zK are hidden behind the axis lines. This then connects to individual grid squares at the ½, as we have described many times in many ways. I haven’t been able to see this so clearly before.

The zeta function is necessary because the division of n by its logarithm takes the End of the log calculation, which means the complexity is ‘inside’ the calculation. This idea of the visible, of the appearance of objects, etc. as the Ends of complex processes is growing in importance. It fits you. It fits me. We are objects which are the Ends of complex processes. We are appearances.

I have looked up proofs of the prime number theorem, and they’re calculation based. The PNT is shown to be equivalent to a function that counts primes and that their ratio approaches and equals 1. I am seeing a pathway. That is, a ratio of 1 has to count primes because gs primes are counts of 1, and this is why the primes appear as a pole. That is very interesting. I was never able to find words for that facet before.

If I have this correct, which seems likely, the primes appear as a pole because they count using a variety of functions, including manual testing, and these are pathways by which the gs processes check identity. This is like any count of a prime in grid squares: all the counts and threads along the way occur but disappear at prime down to 1, and thus to the 0 associated with that 1 (which are both entangled with the count of the prime).

My understanding of the PNT is that no one believes an approach like this can be found. That is, we’re taking the complex analysis out: it now appears in the construction of the pole because we’re constructing 1+1. This isn’t coming out with the fluency I need. There’s a complication in my understanding.

That complication seems to be the tension between the counting of primes up to some n and the determination or calculation of primes. You can’t have the former without the latter. The zeta series forms the latter. I think we need to get into that: the zeta series inverts into 1, which generates 0’s on a pole at ½ because that is where the yK, treated as imaginary versus xK real, has 0’s which extend the 1gs into which the inversion occurs to the gs prime count. This is why we keep talking about injecting value at the bip.

Wow, that was cool.

Was that correct? If so, it’s really, really good. Let’s take a hard look.

The line which stands out is that the ratio of 1 has to count primes because gs primes are counts of 1’s. What I think that means is that all these processes must equal or at least approach 1 asymptotically because processes are modular, meaning they come to Ends, AND that the counting of the logarithm is 1+1 where a 1 is divided into n pieces. And remember this process is hidden and the End, the result of the calculation, is used. That is, the n is divided by the modular application of this process into pieces, the count of which approaches the number of gs primes within n. I’m not sure this is saying anything of value at all.

Why do the pieces count primes? We divide an arbitrary n by its log, and I saw it clearly in AMT but now not so well. Try again. The idea in the natural log is that 1+1 has a gs process value in which we take either 1 and divided it into n pieces, add that to the other 1, and reconstruct by multiplying that sum n times. As we would say, take 1, add nothing (as n goes infinite), multiply that by everything. This remains the most confusing issue we’ve ever discussed. Spent years on it. Very hard to visualize the process.

I think I’m trying to say this is 1. Again. That is, we know it’s a scale, and thus it’s a scale of 1, but it really seems to be a Brick form of 1. That fits better. 1+1 is a brick, which is a bound form of 1. And that finally gets to something: inherent in the conception of a prime is that it runs End-to-End, which is like saying it runs 1 to 1, which is like saying 1+1, which in primes is the essential relationship in which 1+1 extends over the prime so there is a 0 to prime value count in the various ways it can be counted. Wow, new thoughts about something we have more than 10 years of work into!

So, the idea in e is that it is a Brick, an induction along grid squares, which connects 1+1, with that following the gs group conception in which the procession of 1+1 across occurs within larger 1+1 counts that identity check at other levels. All the SBE processes operate like that.

Remember, one of the beauties of the Brick conception is that it overlays 2 Bricks. It helps, I think, I think to imagine 2 Bricks in a line, with another Brick connecting the halves of the first 2, like in a literal brick wall. Think of the organization: 2 layers of grid squares, one at integer, one at midpoints, and now 2 layers of Bricks, and of course now we have Bricks scaling the way grid squares do.

And this finally comes together in an Understanding about the nature of gs primes: they are Brick extensions because that construction unifies the conception of 1 out of 2, then 3, then 4, etc., and gs primes then emerge as unique Brick constructions. This enables higher level labeling like prime. After all, a prime has a Start and an End, and thus a Start gs and an End gs. And the construction of a Brick involves LookBack, meaning you construct inner and outer, left and right or far and near edges.

Where does this go? The obvious connection is that the number of pieces count the number of 0’s, of the number of repeats of the modular construction, and those happen at primes. That’s correct, isn’t it? Modular construction means repeats of the e process, which is a gs process. And those repeats hit 0’s. And those 0’s adhere to a construction which … as above. Wow.

This was extremely difficult. Truly mind-bending work. This is, after all, one of the primary problems in the history of the last few hundred years of mathematics. It shouldn’t be surprising that it took many loops to reach the connection level which reveals the gs explanation of the PNT. By loops, I mean this has come back many times, and that each iteration was part of a loop through the issues of e, each iteration identifying what I could not then understand deeply enough to feel I truly had it down. Bricks does it for me. I have felt this coming on for a few weeks, with little shards of threads popping up to note that I should consider e in light of this new understanding.

Today was a complete surprise. Got PNT and got the crucial issue of how and why injection actually works. This also connects that directly to n at a grid square, which leads to connecting grid squares using n.

[jonathankatwhatever]

Polynesians navigated, I’ve learned, by identifying the look of the waves as they carried the information of the existence of an island outward. They would identify where the lines come together, and with experience they would be able to distinguish individual clues in more circumstances, which enabled them to navigate across different weather. This is actually an application of the hairy ball theorem, that it’s impossible to orient all the 1Segments on a sphere so they all point the same way without there being a point which is a pole around which that organizes. This is easy to see in 1Space, though I’m not sure how to say why. Let’s do this.

I see an attachment to an object which defines through processes that are equivalent to orientation rotation, which means this invokes the bip gs layer, because that locates the sK in each of the 4gs that are related by the bip gs, meaning that is the End which acts as the limit o simultaneity, which is the limit of where that which is to be counted as 1 is counted as 1, meaning where the midpoint-to-midpoint count meets the standard integer count.

The idea in there which we’ve pulled out is that sK is the equivalent of zK counting in two dimensions, the one being standard 1zK, 2zK, etc., and the other being that each zK counts this same way. But that requires counting sK in two dimensions, meaning at each End. This is of course a version of f1-3, in which the missing count of zK going negative is phrased as: if we take one dimension out of sK, then we add at each zK End. This passes around the quadrants, which is f1-3. These are repeated Triangulars. To be clear, Triangulars means 1Space connections in which 0Space exists. Or: the inner edges of 1Space form 0Spaces. This enables counting entirely within a 0Space, as classic 0-1-0, but it also enables counting which hinges (and is thus unhinged on one side, meaning it swings across a potential). This inelegantly is why you can have isolated events, like a romantic interlude in a war movie, and why events represent perspectives. The actual process is inductive, so if you’re counting gs, then it comes from that gs’ location on the gs chain, which is clear when you realize that counting from that edge, from that perspective, has to come from somewhere.

I get confused until I remember that we’re counting in grid squares because we’re counting Bricks because that is the inductive methodology which embodies gs parallels. So, why do we count only in xK and yK and can’t count along s,zK without doing those moves? Because we’ve squeezed s,zK out of visibility, and the remnants are that you can go either xK to yK or yK to xK to count zK(n) to zK(n+1), and thus the step from zK(n) to zK(n+1) combines these steps. And as so often demonstrated, these labels scale, so a 4square can be counted 1-0-1 in xK, yK, sK, and zK. This enables 0-1-0 within those edges.

The mechanics are coming quickly.

Haven’t even touched today’s AMT. I tried so hard to remember it!

I remember it showed me how the layers attach. So, at the bip gs level, the pole represents - wow, this is difficult. In the simplest, it would represent the evaluations, which are valuations, which then apply or can apply within the real. I’m trying to draw this. I see the bip move. I’m hung up on the individual versus the group aspects. As in, let’s assume we need a binary decision of yes I will marry you and no I won’t. That calculates in fCM. That is fascinating to think about. I mean that we spent a lot of time figuring out how fCM works and how that balance becomes finer and finer, and how that invokes the instant replay conundrum, which is that whatever line you set, you will uncover the edges cases to that line, and that includes which kinds of plays you may review because now you consider other plays as possible if.

Oh, now I remember some: the 36-28-36 figure which expresses in ancient fertility images, along with the CM100 variations, like 100-36-64. Or the reverse. I guess the male version would be more 100-64-36 or the reverse, which makes muscle and penis triangles.

I then saw stuff about how a Brick combines with another Brick when counting SBE, which makes SBE+another piece, which then reduces to SBE, which wraps the Brick because that extend it in LookBack, which identifies its outside far edge. You can see how this constructs: each Brick counts and they are ‘squeezed’ back to that which is identifiable as the outcome. Like a proton is 2 up and 1 down. The down is the result of the process which identifies the far edge of the outside of the Brick.

That is mind-blowingly clear and deep. I had doubts I could ever get that out.

What about primes ‘versus’ fCM? Factors. CM28 is 7*2*2. We have discussed in detail how that identifies dimensionally, from the meaning of 7 … oh, here’s more: the meaning of 7 is also the meaning of 13, that it encloses 6 1Segments just as 13 encloses 12 1Segments. And a relatively undeveloped meaning in there is this actually reaches then to the midpoint of the 1Segment which reaches the LookBack End. In other words, we have all these methods of identification counted in Triangular and Hexagonal and in fCM, which means grid squares. All using SBE as the underlying methodology, and now you can see exactly why because we just proved this!!!! I obviously just realized that we just proved SBE as the underlying methodology. Amazing. Really don’t know how to punctuate after amazing

So I didn’t.

I love how well this organizes things. As in, some events can only be linked in certain chains because they require steps to connect, while others can exist in extreme tensioning. This means what actually happens is that superluminal messages, which must be inserted at the Ends because then they are carried ‘intact’, which fits the grid squares explanation of the informational limit, start to appear each each End. That is kind of like a smack in the face: it’s obvious because this flows inherently from the tensioning over the Triangulars.

Need a break.

Forgot: so when Polynesians read the waves, they saw the tensioning, the disappearing traces of that, which is the same as finding the hints of a gravitational wave, meaning as the outcome of a change that induced and which thus spreads, so the traces of that spreading then shift outward like the sK discussion at top.