#but yes his sense of justice and being an embodiment of it literally is...gonna get him into even more trouble down the road.

[justicebled]

𝐖𝐇𝐀𝐓 𝐂𝐎𝐋𝐎𝐑 𝐈𝐒 𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐑 𝐒𝐎𝐔𝐋𝐌𝐀𝐑𝐊?

INDIGO.

Often mistaken for having a purple or blue glow, those who have indigo soulcolors are serious, confident, and strong willed. They know what they want to achieve and set out to do so. They are often introverted and seek balance, setting a strong moral code for themselves and others.

This type admires respect over adoration. They are often social advocates for those who need it and believe peace can only be achieved when everyone is working together, not just a powerful select few. This makes them powerful enemies but a powerful group of close friends, as their charismatic personality to do what’s right attracts people to them.

Since they are constantly trying to differentiate themselves from blue and violet soulcolors, indigo soulcolors are often less friendly and nurturing on the outside, but on the inside, they’re tender and supportive. They prefer to keep those who break their outer wall closer than most.

Due to their uncompromising sense of justice, the indigo soulcolor often starts arguments that might not need to be started, uprooting things just because they don’t like them or playing “devil’s advocate” when unnecessary. Despite telling others to get over it, they rarely ever do so and hold grudges for a long period of time.

tagged by: @lykaiia ( thanks ! ) tagging: @zelotae @ivaios @etrobeauty​ @axisanimus @offiiciium​ @electricea @vulpesse @rosephantoma​ @deathburns​ @hiraesi​ @7theaven @sheyearns @shibuyacrossed @wolvensden @undervjne​ @laputian​ @tenebriism​ @miburoni​ @firexflower @kainescape @seintels @etrobeauty​ @femine​ @saintspun​ + you!

[masqueradeball]

How about number 3? Like, tell us all about it if you want :)

Oh my gosh 🥺 thank you so much for giving me my first ask! 💖 I'm eternally grateful I get to spill all my pheels out.

3. What is my favorite Phantom tv/film adaptation?

My absolute favorite Phantom is the 1925 Lon Chaney silent film. He just embodies everything that I like about Gaston Leroux's Erik for me and he is both horrifying and pitiable. I dislike the ending but I can live with it given it's what test audiences wanted at the time. I truly love his Red Death costume. You can find it on Youtube and the Tubi app for free.

My first runner up would be Claude Raines in the 1943 because his Erique so soft and tragic in that film I cannot help but love him. This was one was my grandma's favorite 'classic monster' movies that she loved, so I have a special place in my heart for this one. I love his hair and appreciate that he was one fine silver fox before the revenge and jealousy issues set in. The opera parts are a little boring, but the costumes and the sassy diva rival to Christine are worth the watch. We get 2 handsome Raouls who end up going to dinner together at the end of the movie and a Christine who gets to bask in the limelight of her career while not choosing any suitor, which is the best possible outcome for her. Double play for the win in my book! You can watch it for free on the Peacock app.

My next runner up is a 3 way tie between Robert Englund, Gerard Butler, and Charles Dance.

I honestly enjoy all their performances because they each bring something unique to the role.

I cannot stress enough how violent the Robert Englund version is if you want to give it a go, but Erik Destler is insane, twisted, and fabulously murdertastic in this. I love the creepy, evil vibes the man gives off. Think of this film as a time travel AU of the original novel. I feel like he nailed Leroux Erik's darker, snarky personality that some people tend to forget he had and the gothic horror parts of the original novel are there. Bonus: they keep the Faust parallels like in the novel!

I'm gonna say it: I love the Charles Dance miniseries. I know it's not the best, but damn, he is so dry and sarcastic I cannot help but enjoy his performance. I want to pinch his cheeks and smother Cherik with the love his father never gave him everytime I see him. Again, this one focuses on the operas a lot, and for me it's a bit boring. But the backgrounds, settings, and props in this thing are fantastic and the costumes are wonderful too.

That leaves Gerard Butler in the 2004 movie. No he is not the world's greatest singing Phantom, but I don't care. I absolutely love his facial expressions and body language. The Phantom is an emotional, expressive dude and the Red Death costume scene is pretty good. I love how kind and sincere Emmy feels in this film and I appreciate she's not overracting and doesn't feel fake compared to some other Christines *coughSierracough* Being the film version of the ALW musical, this Phantom story focuses on the romance and Gerard excels at that. When he and Christine are singing Past the Point of no Return, I FEEL THEIR PASSION! And that's what counts more so than hitting the same notes we've all heard a million times before.

Now for the versions in the 'I will eternally like this' category 😊 :

The Phantom of the Paradise from 1974. This is also a very violent and dark film so fair warning if you haven't seen it. It's a bizarre rock musical, but if you're weird like me and enjoy Rock & Rule or the Rocky Horror Picture Show, this might be a film you'd like too. I don't want to spoil it too much but the Faust/devil parallels are here too, as is various pop culture references. His teeth and mask are terrifyingly cool, and so is the electronic voice box he uses. It makes sense Daft Punk was inspired by this film. Maybe G1 Soundwave was inspired by this film too, but that's a debate for another day 😉

Next is the animated 1988 film. This one features animation on par with other 80s tv cartoons of the time. I love that they kept the Persian and the torture chamber from the novel. The Phantom's death scene is pretty damn epic. Christine is kind of a flake, but animated Leroux Erik is hilariously insane and terribly charming, especially when he calls himself a Don Juan. It's worth watching just for his antics and his dialouge.

You might not expect a Goosebumps episode to do a Phantom story any justice, but here we are: 1995, The Phantom of the Auditorium is a spooky fun take on the story and honestly, I'd like to see the full play the kids at that school are putting on cause it looks better than some of the live Phantom stage scenes I've seen. Both young boys playing the Phantom are fantastic actors and the plot twist at the end is great.

I absolutely have to give a shout out to Wishbone's Pantin at the Opera. He is the best, cutest, most adorable Raoul de Chagney ever and I will fight you if you dare talk smack about this version. I'm not even a Raoul stan by any means but like, this dog is precious and I enjoy this episode so much.

Also in the animated category and cute dog category is Scooby Doo Stage Fright made back in 2013. This movie is one of my fave Scooby Doo films (yes I own almost all of them on dvd) and there are multiple Phantoms, a reality tv show contest, and Fred and Daphne finally kiss each other! Lots and lots of hidden Phantom references in the background and lots of voice acting talent for those of us who appreciate that.

Now for the versions I intensely dislike 😏

The 1962 Herbert Lom version. UGH where to start. The sets are so small and everything looks dirty and of the wrong time period. The color in the film looks washed out. The clothes look too modern somehow (maybe it's their hairstyles?) and it bothers me. It feels low budget in a bad way and it shows. This phantom is not likeable or pitiable even though his backstory is similar to the Claude Raines version. He has no romantic interest in Christine, so it feels off. This guy is such an old a$$ piece of sh*t, he literally slaps Christine as she's singing for him for no damn reason. His paper mache mask looks like a Kindergartener's botched art class project. His personality is like somebody locked up cranky grandpa in the basement and he's PMS-ing because y'all forgot to give him his daily prune juice. This squatter's lair lacks creepiness, and his bizarre sidekick is annoying and yet somehow more interesting than the Phantom. The pervert manager trying to bang Christine aggravated me and simultaneously made me want to vomit. Raoul is the only likeable character in the whole damn movie. The Joan of Arc opera scene makes up for some of the film, but it's still terrible.

Next on my meh list is the 1983 made for tv movie starring Micheal York and Jane Seymour. Now, this one has some likeable and applaudable scenes: the various murders and general creepiness of the Phantom, and the lair scene when she wakes up in his bed and the Phantom gets all up in her face is so intense and so Leroux I absolutely love it. The rest of the film is a jumbled hot mess at best, but Jane Seymour is 🔥 and she gets some damn good sex, so hell yeah to that!

And lastly, I do not like the Royal Albert Hall 25th anniversary recording. I should preface this by saying it is Sierra I don't like. I like Ramin, I love Hadley, everyone else is wonderful but I cannot stand Sierra. She tries too hard to make Christine a Disney Princess- and that doesn't fly with me. It comes off as insincere or mocking the source material at best, and at worst it makes Christine look like an airheaded ditz. Apparently Sierra played Ariel at one point which is hilarious because of all the Disney princesses, I dislike her the most. But that's a different rant for another day.

And finally, the one I hate most of all:

The 1998 Argento film. This is the worst Phantom adaptation I've ever seen. It is a whole lotta nope for me. Between the rats, the unecessary and pointless telepathy, the r*pe scene, and the unfunny weird vibe from the murder going on in this film it's a disaster from start to finish. Honestly, it's the rats and his hair that bother me from a visual standpoint alone and it's beyond disgusting the way this a$$🤡 treats Christine. I don't like any of the characters in here and for good reason. It's not worth watching and if you do, be ready to bleach your brain afterwards.

💖 Sorry if this was a long read! Thanks again for giving me an ask and I will cherish it forver!!!! 💖

[too-scared-to-do-this]

Of the Devil’s head

Chapter seven - Fluffed-up parrots and thieves of all skills

Sander’s sides fanfiction

Wordcount: 1825

Ship: prinxiety (actually getting somewhere finally, people :D)

TW: mentions of illness, panic attack, some light fun-making of stuck up royalty, the Devil being his ‘evil’ self and making death-jokes - if I missed any tell me please :3

A note for all: Hey, sooo.... This is basically a looong conversation, because I let myself go and enjoyed writing what I like - which is dialogue mostly, so... I hope you don’t mind too much.

Summary of the whole story:  They say, the one that wears the crown rules all - the living, the dead, the walking, the crawling, the rooted, the sane and the mad. They say, once you own the crown, you become the  most powerful being on Earth and beyond. Roman’s stolen bigger things - a measly little crown won’t present a problem, even if he has to steel it straight off of the devils head!

------------------------------------------

Chapter seven - Fluffed-up parrots and thieves of all skills

“Why did you come here?”

Yes, indeed a very good question. And Roman had no good enough answer to it. Well, not good enough for the Devil, he though. So instead of the truth, he opted for the easier way out. Flirting.

“I already told you, your royal hotness.” he smirked at the king. “To steal your heart.”

Virgil had a lot to do not to react the way he felt like reacting. While on the outside just a slight dust of pink coated his cheeks - easily hid by the lighting of the place - on the inside he was falling apart and erroring, trying his best to come up with an answer. He was the Devil for Hades’ sake! He wasn’t supposed to react this way to a few flirty words!

Even if the stranger had a nice face structure. And beautiful wondering green eyes. And looked better in Virgil’s clothes then Virgil did himself (this last one has been bothering him since he stepped into his chamber and found the Human sprawled out on his bed).

He wasn’t supposed to be squealing like little girl over this Human being. He was the Devil, the head of Hell. And he was supposed to act like it.

So, he cleared his throat. He was not going down that easily. He leaned towards the thief. “Well, if that’s true, how do you plan on doing that?”

“I-ah...um…” that was not blush on Roman’s cheeks thank you very much! He wasn’t at all fazed by this idiotic demon. And to prove it, Roman spat the first thing that popped up in his head. “With my irresistible charm and good looks, obviously.”

Virgil snorted a little, watching the dramatic hand gestures the being displayed. It kind of reminded him of Remington (witch was a cause of big concern at best), but on them he found it somewhat… endearing.

“For a simple Human being you are very confident.”

“And why shouldn’t I be?” the thief grinned, already ready to preform the play of his life. “Just look at my gorgeous self! Who could resist this?”

“Exactly how many other fleshlings have you dated?”

“Um well… none - but that’s not what’s important! There was no one worthy enough of my awesomeness.”

The devil laughed again, flashing those sharp fangs at Roman,

“After all! I was the only one that managed to find the entrance to hell between all these fluffed-up parrots!”

“Fluffed-up parrots?”

“The princes!” the liveling explained. But when Virgil only razed an amused eyebrow questioning the thief’s judgement, Roman mouth almost fall open. With eyes wide and a big unbelieving grin, he started talking and gesturing animatedly again. “Oh, come on! Don’t tell me I’m not right! Have you seen any of them? With all their powdered faces, walking like there’s hot wire up their asses.”

“Hot wire? If they’d be true, they wouldn’t be walking, believe me. There’s a room for that kind of torture.”

“But I’m serious!” the Human jumped up, prancing around, mimicking the princes. “And their lips are always pushed together as if they ate a whole lemon or something! And oh my god-“

“Oh Hades, don’t mention that prick.” Virgil grumbled, rolling his eyes, but Roman didn’t seem to care.

“- that complete sense of superiority! It’s so awful! “I am prince Frogface. Look at me, I am so strong and handsome! I’ll bring you the crown, oh dearest King! Just look at me as I go into the woods and then come back empty handed!”

“So that’s why you came…” the Devil said calmly, lost in his own thoughts.

Roman immediately shut up. Somewhere in the conversation he forgot he was actually a prisoner and the creature he was talking to was the actual real-life Devil. His captor. The one that could kill him with a snap of his finger. Probably even would, for all Roman knows. Shit… he really messed up, didn’t he? “Y-yeah… I-“

The king waved his hand to dismiss their words. “I’m guessing your king wanted the all-mighty crown and the power that comes with it yada-yada.” he said rolling his eyes. “Yes, I know the story. Everybody wants the crown”

Somehow this didn’t surprise him. But he couldn’t deny the little disappointment he felt at their words. Oh well… Guess no creature would be dumb enough to actually fall for the Devil.

“So, you were the only one who found the entrance?” he raised an eyebrow, waiting for the other to continue.

Roman was expecting everything - anger, shouting, even flames (who knew what this thing was capable off) - but the last thing he expected was for the demon to sit calmly.

“Why… aren’t you more outraged?” the nervous thief asked, watching Virgil cautiously. “You’re supposed to be the big bad Devil! The embodiment of all evil! The Merciless blood-spiller.”

Virgil snorted - he hasn’t heard that one yet before.

“I just expected something more… I don’t know… evil? To come out of you?" Roman rambled, because what else was he supposed to do?

Virgil blew air out of his nose - which could be classified as a sort of ‘you’re such an idiot’ laugh. “Relax. It’s not like I’m gonna bite of you head.” he rolled his eyes. And they twinkled with a wicked idea.  “Although… I could just-” he grinned, showing of his fangs - all thirty of them. Licked them just for the effect.

The thief shivered. He knew that momentary relief was just that - momentary.

Virgil leaned closer and closer, until Roman was completely flush against the supporting-beam’s stone. The Human closed his eyes, petrified.

And then he heard it. That complete and utter free laughter. He frowned looking back forward. And the Devil was literally laughing in his face. “Y-you humans are so naïve! I can’t- Why would you believe any of that?”

Roman and his offended noises didn’t much help the Devils laughing-cramp.  “Ah, huh… okay…okay.. I’m - I’m calm now… please… hah… continue on. You were the only one who found the entrance?”

Roman pierced his lips and glared at the demon in front of him.

“You are evil.”

“Oh sweetie, I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but you’re in Hell. Everybody’s evil.” Virgil smirked. “But go on. I’m curious.”

The thief’s angry expression didn’t hold up much longer and he pick up where he left off. “Yes, I was the only one it seems. I don’t know how those morons missed the signs. I mean - they were right there. in front of their big, up-turned noses. Oh, and by the way - you guys are idiots!”

Virgil blinked in surprise “What?”

“I mean it! How dumb can one be to need directions to their home!”

“I mean those aren’t really for u-”

As much as Virgil found the rambling of his prisoner endearing, this was getting a little too much.

“Like, you’re supposed to be these big smart canning demons and you need signs to get home.”

“Those-“

“Like, humans really have to rethink ow we view your kind-“

“Hey, fleshling!” the Devils stern voice finally cut through Romans flood of words. “Don’t tempt it.” he gave them a look.

“Iiiii’m shutting up now.” the thief nodded, biting on his lips. I really need to learn when shut my mouth…

“Good.”

Silence fall upon the two and believe me, it wouldn’t do it justice simply calling it ‘awkward’. Roman looked everywhere but at the king. And Virgil sat, thinking about ways to break the silence.

And then something popped up in his head! “Why did you want that crown anyways?”

“Oh, that!” Roman grabbed onto the offered string as greedily as a thirsty man for water. He rubbed his neck somewhat ashamed. “It’s not me who wants it. Our King has decided he wants to rule all and promised a really nice reward for it. And I could really use that money…”  

Virgil tilted his head. He didn’t know the Human standards of living, but this being seemed a little too torn up to him from the beginning. His curiosity was spiked. “Why?”

“Well… My mother is really ill and- oh shit! How long have I been down here?!”

“Am… a-about a day in human time?” the complete and utter fear that for once weren’t cause by Virgil, took him by surprise.

“A day and a half?!” Roman jumped up again, looking around for the way back. “I-I have to get back. I have to go!”

The demon watched him. “I’m afraid I can’t let you…”

“No, you don’t understand! My mother is dying! If I don’t get back she’ll-“ Ro’s lips quivered. “And god knows King won’t give a shit about a poor old woman! I have to get back home!”

Their breathing was becoming shallow. Their movements frantic and rigid. They were shaking.

Virgil knew those signs all too well… He slowly stood up, keeping his eyes at the slowly panicking being. “Hey, come on look at me.”

Roman didn’t do that. Instead, his eyes finally found the entrance and his he was so ready to just bolt out of there, but Virgil reached him first, grabbing his wrist.

That didn’t doo much good, because the other froze up completely, breathing worsening. The Devil didn’t think this true… But he had to do something!

He turned them around and looked them directly in the eye talking calmly and clearly (of course, that wasn’t the case on the inside). “Look. I can’t let you out. But! I can send some healers to your house. There’s not a disease those demons aren’t capable of healing. I can promise you, she’ll be in good hands.”

Roman blinked at him. he tried to speak, but somehow words didn’t come.

“Now, though, I need you to breath. Okay?”

He tried, he really did, but he kept tearing up in the middle of a breath and failing at slowing them down.

That is, until the demon in front of him started counting. He found himself listening to those simple numbers repeating over and over again until somehow his breathing adjusted to it.

He didn’t even notice when he went down to the ground. Not even when he ended up holding both of those black-nail clad hands in a death grip. But the Devil didn’t seem fazed. He just kept on counting until Romans breathing finally evened out.

He was so tired. And still shaking. He just wanted to close his eyes and sleep.

But his mother-

“Let’s go find the healers and tell them where to go.” Virgil gave a small smile and stood up, holding a hand out to the Human.

If this was a joke, it was the cruelest one of all. Being kind and helpful then pulling the rug from under his feet. That’d be cruel even for the Devil. Nobody deserves to be played like that.

Roman really hoped this wasn’t a cruel joke…

And he took that hand.  

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I’m not sure if this is what you were waiting for, but this is what I have to offer XD

I myself really enjoy when a story centers around the main characters and shows of the dynamic between them. Not much happened in this chapter, but they talked a bit and I got more comfortable with how I write them together and individually - you could say I got to know them more.

So... I hope you liked it :3

And as always, questions are really appreciated :)

-

Tag list:

@romano-hottopic

@vpow

@alice-only-me

[emathevampire]

Compass for team chaotic good

Compass: who’s the moral compass? in general: what are your OCs’ morality like? do they have high morals, or not? are their morals self imposed, or do they base their morals on religion/family/influence of others?  Well, considering that they’re called Team Chaotic Good, that should give you a pretty solid idea of what they’re about! But not everyone is ACTUALLY chaotic good. Some aren’t even Chaotic. Or Good, in fact! Funnily enough, about half of them are Lawful, actually. So here’s the breakdown. Team Chaotic Good has quite a few members, so I’ll put it under a cut, as it’s a bit long.

Kíhyué: The team leader. Is Actually Chaotic Good. Has a very strong moral core, and while he doesn’t expect everyone he associates with to actually BE good-aligned, he damn well expects them all to act like it. The society he was raised in was largely Lawful/Neutral, but his outlook ended up completely different as a result of the mistreatment he suffered at the hands of strict laws and “neutral” stances that did more harm than good. “No such thing as an innocent bystander. You stand by and do nothing, you do not want to get involved, fine. But do not call yourself innocent. Do not say you did no harm when you could have done good instead.”

Inimicia: Sort of like his second in command, she’s Exalted Lawful Good. Not something you’d expect from the infamous Assassin Queen, or a half-vampire, or someone whose name literally means “the enemy,” but she’s had a long hard crawl up from being born chaotic evil and like hell she’s going to give up the good fight now. Her morals are 100% self-imposed, and she goes out of her way to find others in need of similar impositions and help them learn how to use objectively evil powers for good. Her order of assassins is ironically mostly good aligned, and she works very hard to keep it that way, sending them on missions to slay demons and devils and other undeniable evils who’ve managed to blend into society. This often leads to them looking like the bad guys, of course... nobility who keep their sinister deeds well hidden suddenly drop dead murdered in their own homes, and no one understands why. No one, except the victims of their cruelty whose pleas Inimicia’s spies overhear. She’s especially wary of religion, and any religion that claims to serve “the greater good.” A deity, of course, has the power to decide just what they think the greater good actually is, and cannot be trusted not to be acting solely in their own self-interest, or to actually do good deeds at all. “Go ahead. Paint me as your enemy. The world can believe you all it wants to, I’ll be the villain if you make me. I’ll still know the truth... and so will you.” Xadrea Shadowborn: Is Exalted Chaotic Good out of sheer spite and determination. Unlike Kíhyué, she absolutely expects Good out of everyone, even if she has to drag them kicking and screaming into behaving like decent human beings. Arguably this is the result of outside influence, though it’s... complicated. Essentially, she and her companions in a different universe had been given these artifacts that would tempt them into corruption in exchange for power, ultimately transforming them into an avatar of one of the Archdukes of Hell if they succumbed to enough temptations to lose their souls. Xadrea watched this happen to SEVEN of her party members. She outright refused to fall, ended up hosting the deity Heironeous instead of an archfiend, and saved the universe, all thanks to pure fucking spite and refusing to do as she was told by the voice in her head. Her sense of justice and honour don’t always conform to what one would expect of a literal divine embodiment of Valor, but she argues that’s what makes her best for the job, since she absolutely will not get caught up over doing the lawful thing as opposed to the right thing... something she and Kíhyué both agree is what makes their approach to fighting evil the best one. Her morals, ultimately, come from the shitty little slothful voice in the back of her mind that wants her to lie down and accept defeat, protect herself and forget the world... “Oh, you wish I’d quit, don’t you? Well it’s not gonna happen. NEVER gonna happen. You want apathy from me? Get bent, devil. I’m going to CARE. I am going to care SO much, ON PURPOSE, about EVERYTHING but you, and you can’t fucking stop me.” Anaziah the Kind: A paladin of freedom, Anaziah is another actual Chaotic Good member. If her former epithet of “the Wrathful” isn’t enough of an indication, she certainly didn’t used to have a moral compass, and it’s a testament to her strength of will that she’s managed to change and become a better person. She’s still pretty new at this whole “being a good person” thing, and looks to Faendys and the others for guidance, very grateful to all of them for giving her a chance instead of judging the Drow book by its cover. “I was raised to hate everything that wasn’t like us. To hate, to subjugate, to destroy. But... I was never really like ‘us,’ was I? All they ever really taught me was how to hate myself. The surface world isn’t like that. I’m free here. I’m allowed to love instead. It’s not easy, but, doesn’t everyone deserve the chance to try?” Faendys: Neutral Good, Faendys is the very calm one, who’s never trying to make any sort of deep commentary on anything on purpose, but often ends up making unsettlingly wise comments anyway. They rarely have to say much, and rarely do say much when things get serious, but their small voice piping up with something profound is always what gets the rest of them to shut up and act reasonably when their opposing alignments cause conflict. Even if it’s just a simple “That’s... not okay,” Faendys trusts their gut when it comes to tough ethical dilemmas, and the others generally listen to them. “I know it sounds hard. And it’s probably going to make us a lot of enemies. Even if we get away with it. But... we haven’t been afraid of that before, have we? They need our help, and we know it. What makes this time any different?” Arekos Aidoneus: A dread necromancer who’s also the party healer, Arekos is Lawful Neutral, and the only thing preventing him from being Good is the fact that many of the spells he casts are technically evil (see: raising armies of undead). However, he’s very careful to only use these spells for good purposes, and also has a few spells from the Book of Exalted Deeds on his list... his moral fibre is rather complex. His approach to the subject is based very strongly on his culture and religion: keep the balance in all things, use your dark powers only to serve the light, and defend the cause of good for the cause of evil needs no help to prosper. This creed is how he stays lawful despite actively working towards arguably chaotic goals, because dismantling the government brick by brick is, in fact, something he is required by his social and religious obligations to do, provided that the government in question is evil. Kíhyué and Xadrea absolutely hate it when he brings this up. “The world would love to prove that we cannot be good, that we cannot be kind, that we cannot be anything but evil and should not exist. I should very much like to prove them all wrong.” Amanthos Panideios: Also Lawful Neutral, with a heavy emphasis on Lawful, this librarian monk knows full well that he does not really fit in here... so he follows the others’ lead more often than not, managing to stay lawful despite the chaotic things they get up to the same way Arekos does. He also just... avoids getting directly involved with anything that would involve breaking the law in ways he can’t rationalise. Amanthos is not Moral, he is Ethical, and this is both a good thing (he’s able to rationalise many of the chaotic things he engages with as actually complying with the code of ethics he is meant to follow) and a bad thing (not everything has an easy answer, and it’s very easy for him to potentially fall into Lawful Evil behaviour if someone else isn’t around to check his work). “Oh dear... we didn’t cover this in any of my moral philosophy lectures... Arekos? Arekos, do you know the answer to this one?” Psamion: The bard, the sea captain, the Chaotic Neutral (but good-leaning!) one. He did his time as the hero, and quite frankly he hated every second of it, it traumatised him thoroughly, and he never wants to speak of it again. He’s perfectly content to continue doing his best to help people, in his own way, but absolutely does not want to let himself get dragged into another high-stakes demon hunt to the Hells and back, because he barely came out of the last one alive. That being said, Kíhyué is his closest friend in the entire universe, and he would do anything for him... so, naturally, when Kíhyué says “We have to save the world again,” Psamion just sighs, packs his things, and says “Can’t it just stay saved for once?” as he follows Kíhyué out the door. “Look, I don’t much care for this whole ‘getting involved’ thing, but if Kíhyué says it’s time to put up a fight, and he needs my help, you’d best believe I’m pulling out my knives and hucking a flaming bottle wherever he points me to. The world’s in trouble, and damn it all, by some miracle I’m STILL one of the idiots who lives in it, thanks to him... If I’m gonna fight, it may as well be a good fight.” Eomer: Is a gryphon. Kíhyué raised him from a hatchling, and their moral cores are as such pretty much identical... though Eomer is much more empathetic and often needs to give Kíhyué a kick in a more compassionate direction. “I think you very brave for trying. Maybe we fail, yes, happen some times. But what if not! Any thing can happen! Good thing, even! You would not even try for good? For happy thing? Stupid. Go try. Come try with me. I will go by myself, yes? No? Good! Together, we stand a chance, always worth a chance.”

[raguna-blade]

Getting Closer to actually daily rambling

So, I am, slowly, quite slowly, achingly slowly, working my way to doing a big ole analysis of Persona 5 Because that’s the exact kind of nerd I am but one thing has kind of stuck out to me in Persona 5 as a weird problem.

Like, in a game that starts out with a PRETTY FUCKING DIRE stance on sexualization of young women, what the fuck is going on with Ann?

LIke, it’s weird that the game starts off so strong on that front, and then from that point forward in regards to Ann drops the ball like a lead weight into a blackhole.

Seriously, the statement is made rather objectively and clearly, Don’t Sexualize the young lady and then...proceeds to kind of do that the entire game right? Unless I’m misremembering things rather badly which is quite possible.

And I got a little mini essay thing of notes hidden away elsewhere right now looking at it, but this one thought came to mind semi recently and well...

Ok, let’s talk about themes in the persona games, at least in the last three mainline ones alright? And specifically, we’re gonna talk about said themes in relation to Shadows which are of varying levels of importance throughout the series. Honestly, I should one day do the first couple of games to get a full picture of it but...

Still before we go further, Quick definition. Fans will know, unfan’s won’t, but either way I want to be clear of the definition I’m rolling with here. What the flip fuck is a Shadow? In series, a Shadow is basically an embodiment of well...You. It’s all the stuff you repress about yourself, and in series that’s pretty universally negative.

Thing is though, the thing about that, Shadows in Jungian Psych aren’t. As I understand it anyway, they’re not inherently negative. Shadows are basically just whatever you repress about yourself, good or bad. It’s whatever you refuse to acknowledge, either because of trauma, danger, ignorance, actual refusal, whatever. Anything and everything about yourself that you don’t ever want to deal with and you shove off into the negative space of your mind halls so you don’t have to deal with it ever again becomes a part of the Shadow.

Got it? Cool.

Now themes though. Persona 3 has a pretty cut and dry theme (more or less, and drawing from rather old memories at this point) involving Death, Mortality, and the fact that you are absolutely positively going to kick the fucking bucket one day so you better live up and be the best you you possibly can be of yourself. You see it in all of the Persona’s and how they evolve going through the game’s story line. Inevitably, as they have to deal with things that they’ve struggled with in a unvarnished and straightforward way, they have to integrate these new truths into themselves and basically become better people, more whole. And in doing so, their persona’s grow up and become stronger.

Now as far as shadows go, they never really make an appearance in the game formally (in the sense of specific shadows relevant to the characters themselves. You spend the entire game putting foot to shadowy ass, much to your detriment) EXCEPT FOR, Strega and those who use the drugs to control their personas. Which is weird, because they’re still personas right? Except that a Persona is EXPLICITLY a tamed shadow, yourself put under your control more or less, so for Strega and the other drug users, They haven’t actually done the proper actualization that the rest of SEES and them do to get their persona’s under their control. They haven’t exactly confronted themselves and overcome it, thus why, occasionally, their Persona Flip out and try to kill them because YOU STILL HAVEN’T GOTTEN THIS SHIT UNDER CONTROL YOU NINNIES.

Make sense? Cool, we move forward to 4.

Four has a rather explicit and subtle theme about reaching out to the truth and cutting through ignorance to find the heart of things, and as regards shadows and self, acknowledging your true self. The more you do it, the stronger your persona becomes etc etc, but unique here is that everyone (and I include MC here because I am DAMN certain that Teddie is his castoff shadow but that’s a whole other story) literally confronts their shadows before making them into their personas, and what we see universally is that their shadows are...Kind of raging assholes yes, but also none of them are exactly you know...EVIL. Kind of dickish, and playing up fears and such, but that’s kind of what happens when you don’t deal with your shadow. Let it fester and you start getting weird neuroses about things and start tearing yourself up about such minor things as you know, hating the town you live in, the distinct possibility that you’re nowhere near as straight as you thought you were, the disquieting thought that you’re basically whoring yourself out to make a living, or that you’ve got a distinct and actual problem with Gender In Regards to your desired profession and/or yourself.

You know. Minor Teen things.

But Inevitably, you confront yourself, you confront the situation, you integrate, and your shadow becomes your persona. Cool Story.

Now I’m going to pause here and mention something that only explicitly becomes a thing here in four and that is that Shadows are shown universally to have bright yellow GLEAMING eyes, and that’s going to become SILLY important in about 20 seconds.

SO WE MOVE ON TO PERSONA 5, with it’s themes of rebellion and freedom, and being your own authentic self all times everytime, anytime. Symbolized, rather explicitly, by the outfits each and every one of the Phantom Thieves wear when they enter a Palace.

Which is cool, but I hear you asking, but what of the shadows? WHAT OF THE SHADOWS MAN.

Where the fuck are they? I mean, yeah their persona but...

Hey.

Hey buddy.

You remember every single time the characters transform for the first time their eyes turn into that gleaming yellow color in their eye spaces?

Why it’s almost like they’re...Almost like they’re becoming their shadows?

Why yes, that is exactly what I think is happening here, because TO A MAN, every shadow summon we see has them saying some frankly OMINOUS SHIT. Like...One second let me just rip from the SMT Wiki right quick.

Listen to this shit Arsene Says when he’s summoned.

"What's the matter...? Are you simply going to watch? Are you forsaking him to save yourself? Death awaits him if you do nothing. Was your previous decision a mistake then? Very well...I have heeded your resolve. Vow to me. I am thou, thou art I...Thou who art willing to perform all sacrilegious acts for thine own justice! Call upon my name, and release thy rage! Show the strength of thy will to ascertain all on thine own, though thou be chained to Hell itself!" 

Now if Persona Are Shadows, an established fact in canon, the fact Arsene is saying this to Akira is KIND OF FUCKING CONCERNING, and as I realized like yesterday pretty explicitly foreshadows the bad end. Because well...Do what I want for my own justice? yeah no way that can go wrong it’s not like anyone else in the game is doing that no sirree.

But this is about Ann right? And her frankly kind of weird sexualization that’s going on throughout the game?

What’s Carmen Got to say?

"My... It's taken far too long. Tell me... Who is going to avenge her if you don't? Forgiving him was never the option... Such is the scream of the other you that dwells within... I am thou, thou art I... We can finally forge a contract... There you go... Nothing can be solved by restraining yourself. Understand? Then I'll gladly lend you my strength."

That’s...Actually relatively tame. Stop restraining yourself. Uh...ok. Guess that has nothing to-

WAIT A FUCKING SECOND WHO’S CARMEN?

Hey now, short story, Carmen is the heroine of the titular play, and she is a woman who is rather handily in control of her sexuality even when it ends up destroying her (admittedly, because two idiots couldn’t stop being you know...dumb. But anyway). Critical thing though, Carmen is basically a femme fatale, and as Ann says in her Social Link, those were always the kinds of characters that she wanted to be like. Those sexy, kind of devilish lady villains from kids cartoons and you know what, that’s pretty cool. That’s a level of absolute self confidence and such that cannot be denied I think so fair’s fair.

But uh...Have...have any of you seen Ann seduce anyone in the game? She’s....She’s really fucking bad at it guys. She’s actually, consistently awful at it. And yet, Ann is also consistently, continually, stated and shown to be the hot one of the group, such as it goes.

Which, fine, but still...Why the ball dro-

Have you seen her social link? The one where she more or less throughout finds that things she’s been doing on automatic require real genuine effort more than what she was doing? Like say, consistent diet and exercise, skin care, etc etc etc if she wants to be a model? Things she was absolutely not doing? Things she was, in fact, kind of really stunningly, amazingly ignorant of?

I...I almost feel...I almost feel like there’s a parallel here, something something...

Well, Their Shadowverse costumes are explicitly their idea of rebellion, and transforming into it, at least for the first time, has them apparently transforming however briefly into their shadows.

Which says to me, that functionally she, and the rest of the Phantom Thieves, are TRYING ON their shadows. That is to say, they are actively, knowingly, willingly embracing their Shadow Selves, in opposition to the previous groups who more or less suborn the shit out of their less repressed halves. And why wouldn’t they?

I didn’t bring up themes for no reason you know, ramble though this is. The Story is obssessed with being free, breaking the chains that bind you, and outright rebellion. How could they POSSIBLY keep on theme with that, if the first thing that happens upon awakening your persona you shove your shadow in a box and never talk about it again because Hey Y’all, it’s under control, no need to deal with that den of horrors and things I don’t want to think about.

Ann is, effectively, just as everyone else is, trying to directly integrate her shadow self into her. And for her, that involves sexuality rather explicitly. Which is probably even more of a problem for her (for all that it’s not explicitly brought up again ever by anyone else in the game because you know...Rape/Sexual Assault, whether threatened or actual is kind of stressing? Especially if it’s by someone who’s an authority figure and you were supposed to respect and was supposed to protect you? Just...Yeah.)

I mean I’m not an expert by any means, but holy fuck would I think repressing thoughts of myself being sexual in any way shape or form especially when I really wasn’t trying to be and up until that point wasn’t consciously aware of how I was would be absolutely understandable if not justified especially given proximity to the event.

But with that said, She, and the rest of the cast for all of their less than stellar attributes as expressed by their outfits and persona, are actively trying on those parts of themselves, rather explicitly being the version of themselves that they don’t feel they are, or don’t exactly want to be, and have hidden away for one reason or another.

And for Ann, that’s well...being a sexual person. Which notably, no one else at all seems to struggle with save perhaps Makoto but that is arguably a different story (her blanket lack of understanding of love does lean towards inexperience in relationships, which I absolutely get, but on the other hand, her first action upon awakening is to put on a full leather outfit, call herself queen, and immediately mount and ride her [female who pretended to be male] persona out of the mind bank ufo of a dude who kind of threatened making her with prostitution(not strictly in that order), not to mention that her Arcana Card has a lady checking out a questionably clothed model but uh...It’s a different sexual issue shall we say? Although, now that I think about it, does raise some curious questions if my Makoto is the other actual protag thing ever bears fruit.)

Now mind, this doesn’t exactly excuse the camera antics involved, that’s something else entirely, but otherwise, it’s actually pretty consistent from what I recall of it all, So you know...There’s that.

Still mostly a ramble, as there’s a lot missing here but still.

Gotta get into the habit if I’m gonna make a right and proper daily ramble yah?

[qirahsoka]

WHY YODA IS ARGUABLY THE BIGGEST BITCH IN STAR WARS

When someone says the words, “Star Wars,” typically, the first things to pop into one’s mind go something along the lines of laser swords, space monks, cool ships, and Yoda. Yes, Yoda, he’s that archetypal oracle on the mount; a tiny but incredibly powerful space wizard. Kind of like Dumbledore or Gandalf, just much shorter and green.

Being one of the most iconic characters of the original trilogy, the alien has gained a mass following over time. His famous pearls of wisdom and goofy yet simultaneously stoic have captured the hearts of middle-aged men all over the world that his fan base has become something akin to a cult. Seriously, just look around. His face is plastered over merchandise and his name irrevocably branded to the Star Wars franchise. He is everywhere.

But why? Why has this little green goblin become such an iconic Star Wars character? Many old OT fanboys would tell you he was the heart and soul of a millennium of light side force instruction for the Jedi, embodying what it truly meant to be a force for good. They’d say he was a wise go-to source for acquiring knowledge, a humble and kind know-it-all who could solve almost every problem in the galaxy with his powerful insight and wisdom.

Ironic, since his so called “wisdom” is the cause of almost every problem in the Star Wars universe.

    PART I: I’M NOT A BAD PERSON, I SWEAR! BUT HERE, LET ME JUST ENCOURAGE SLAVERY

 Let’s take our minds back, all the way back to the Phantom Menace. Ah, yes, the dreaded Episode I of the prequel trilogy. Where we’re introduced to little Ani, the pint-sized version and frankly, just as bold, of Darth Dad. So, Master Qui-Gon, being a complete darling, swoops Anakin under his wing and whisks him away to Coruscant after learning of his intensely powerful force sensitivity. Here Anakin undergoes a test in the Jedi Council room to determine whether or not this supposed “Chosen One” is who he appears to be. So here’s Anakin, a tiny-nine-year old boy, a former slave who was just abruptly taken from his mother and the only life he’s ever known, on a completely new planet surrounded by a circle of strangers.

And Yoda, being the toad he is, has the audacity to tell him he is too full of fear to be a Jedi. Well, thank you for pointing out the obvious, oh mighty Grandmaster. No shit, of course this little boy is going to be fearful. He’s in a completely new world, halfway across the galaxy from his home planet, without the only person he’s ever trusted and loved, his mother, and he’s unsure he’s ever going to see her again. He’s been planted into the middle of a ring of some of the most powerful beings in the galaxy and, to be completely honest, it kind of looks like he’s being offered as some kind of sacrifice to a cult of magic space people. Yet Yoda, who is supposed to be the embodiment of compassion, cannot find it in his heart to let the boy down gently. He is hypocritical, claiming Anakin’s intense inner fear is the reason of his failure, but in actual reality, it is Yoda who is scared of a little boy. So, instead he turns him away and plans to send him back to his mother and resume a life of slavery.

That’s right. The Grandmaster of the Jedi Order sending a kid back to be a slave. Wonderful.

Yoda has had quite the run with slavery. He’s basically the head guy of the Jedi, who are the peacekeepers of the galaxy and deliverers of justice. So why was justice not given to the trillions of slaves in the outer rim? Before the war, the Jedi had more than enough resources to rid planets of slavery, and with the aid of the Republic, the Outer Rim’s slaves could have been freed in a matter of years. But no, Yoda deemed them unimportant to their cause and had no intention to help them. So it’s no surprise that no further actions were taken to free Shmi or the many other slaves in the galaxy, not after Yoda considered sending her child back to chains. Evidently, his sense of justice and compassion has become majorly distorted over the years.

   PART II: THAT TIME SHIT WENT DOWN WITH AHSOKA

 Speaking of justice, let’s jump 12 or so years into the future and take a look at some of the events during the Clone War, as shown through the eyes of The Clone Wars animated TV series. This cartoon introduced us to a multitude of new and incredibly complex characters, such as Captain Rex, Fives, and most importantly, Ahsoka Tano. Her character was introduced as a brash and smart-mouthed girl, one whose snippiness earned her her name and whose recklessness could rival that of her Master’s. Over time, the character who audiences initially despised grew and flourished under Anakin’s tutelage and she developed into one of the most beloved and important Star Wars characters, so much so she has earned her own novel and reappearances and references in other media such as books, comics, and even TV shows.

It was early into the war where we were introduced to the spunky young padawan. It is revealed that Anakin did not choose her to be his student, which has been typical Jedi protocol for thousands of years. Instead, she had been assigned to him, much like Anakin was to Obi-Wan. Yoda, typically, was behind this unorthodox pairing, claiming it would teach Anakin a lesson in attachment, seeing as the little green gremlin is so disapproving of Anakin’s compassion. Yoda explicitly states that the Council hopes that training a Padawan will help Anakin deal with attachments because the Padawan, eventually, must either a) move on or b) die.

So basically, Yoda just sent a 14-year-old girl into a warzone, a child soldier, to be Anakin’s student, so he can watch her die and then get over it. This little girl was literally sent to Anakin so he could, once again, become too attached to her, then he could watch her leave or die or whatever sick plan Yoda had concocted for her, and then get over it, all in the hopes that this would magically cure Anakin of being over attached. Oh, goody! What a completely fool proof plan this is, this will definitely cure Anakin of being a decent, loving human being! Absolutely nothing could go wrong! EXCEPT THAT IS DOES.

 It’s about two years later when Ahsoka is framed for murder and treason against the Jedi and the Republic after the temple is bombed. She goes on the run in an attempt to prove her innocence, since Yoda commands the Jedi to hunt her down. She is brought in before the Jedi and is trialed before them to determine her innocence or guilt. It is quite obvious the Jedi know she is innocent; she has served in the war dutifully for years and has made many friends among the council. But here comes good ol’ Tarkin, telling Yoda and the council that they have to expel her from the order so she can have a military tribunal, free of bias lies, deception). So of course, we expect the Jedi to tell Tarkin to stick his request further up his backside than that stick already in there, because why would they desert one of their own? Yoda would never throw one of his young students to the dogs at the slightest inconvenience, he would never abandon them in their time of need! Well, surprise plot twist! He does.

Knowing perfectly well that she is innocent, he exiles her from the order so the Republic can trial her. Just a side note, the Republic end up almost sentencing her to death, a minor, without sufficient evidence, which Yoda knew would happen. He doesn’t even give her a chance to properly argue their statement or explain why she ran from them, instead chalking her claims down to “her vision being clouded with the Dark Side.” Yeah, okay, that’s fine. Just condemn a teenage girl to death, why don’t you?

So anyways, Anakin ends up proving her innocence for her since Yoda made no move to defend her. Long story short, they end up offering to reinstate her position in the GAR and also offer her Knighthood because bribing people in an attempt to make them forget you wronged them is perfectly okay. Not only does he do this, but he never even apologises to her. No, “sorry, I know I basically condemned you to an execution even though you’ve served this order since you were three years old, I was completely wrong!” Just silence, while beside him, Mace wonderfully offers no condelences either for traumatising this girl and instead excuses their wrongs by saying it was actually her great trial. “Haha! Surprise, this was all just a big joke. You weren’t really gonna be killed, it was just your Knighthood trial! You’ve just been pranked by the prank patrol!”

So, Ahsoka, being the wonderful and smart girl she is, takes no shit from them and turns on her heel and leaves the order, consequently leaving Anakin. He’s pretty shattered, considering the girl he thinks of as a daughter just walked away from him and the only life she’s ever known. Here’s where the plan goes wrong: remember that oh-so-great plan Yoda had, the one where Ahsoka would leave and Anakin would get over it and cure his attachment issues? Yeah, no.

   PART III: THINK I CAN’T CONDEMN THE ENTIRE GALAXY TO A REIGN OF EVIL? HOLD MY BEER!

 Instead, this ordeal only pushes him further to the Dark Side, meaning Yoda’s plan has completely and utterly backfired. Didn’t exactly think that one through, did you, mate? Oh well, there’s still time to fix this, Yoda. Just tell Anakin that it’s okay to love and be attached to people, that it’s okay to be compassionate and caring, just as long as you don’t let attachments control you. This would’ve been some pretty good advice, some words Anakin desperately needed as he spiralled further towards the Dark Side. But no, as if Yoda hasn’t already learnt from his mistakes, he only makes them worse. Instead, when Anakin is almost at breaking point, he tells him, “Rejoice for those around us who transform into the Force. Mourn them, do not. Miss them, do not. Attachment leads to jealousy, the shadow of greed, that is." Anakin then questions what he must do, to which Yoda replies, "Train yourself to let go of everything you fear to lose."

Okay, people. We realise that Yoda just told Anakin to let Padme die, right? Anakin came to him so he could have guidance from the damn Grandmaster of the Order, and Yoda simply tells him oh, yeah, sorry mate, save them? No can do. Just let them die. You’ll get over it, bro. I’m sorry, but, do you literally never learn? You, of all people, know just how attached this man gets, and yet you still think that letting the ones he loves die is a good idea? Okay. Whatever. You do you, boo boo. You just better hope this doesn’t have any dire consequences, such as, I don’t know, the creation of one of the most powerful Sith Lords ever, the death of the Jedi Order and the Empire.

Look, I know Palpatine is basically the mastermind behind everything. He manipulated Anakin from when he was a boy and turned the Republic against the Jedi. But, come on, you cannot look me in the eye and tell me that Yoda was completely innocent. It was his own fault, from his hypocrisy to his ignorance, that the Jedi fell. He and the Jedi were working for the Dark Lord of the Sith for years and had no idea. Completely oblivious. Like, eating lunch with him. Taking orders from him. Sending inter-office funny emails back and forth. Yet, somehow, Yoda still had the gall to accuse both Ahsoka and Anakin for their sense of clarity being clouded. Um, okay, take a look at yourself, sweetie.

He had no regard, at all, for upholding the Jedi values. It was entirely his fault that he allowed his students to fall because he was responsible for caring for them and ensuring they were trained properly. Hell, he couldn’t even keep his own student from falling, and that’s not even adding to the fact that Dooku later became one of the most powerful Sith lords ever. Yoda’s students-going-crazy track record goes to show how much his methods have failed; two out of five students from his lineage fell to the Dark Side and one left the order. Yeah, kinda goes to show how far acting like a too-good-for-anyone-of-a-lower-rank-than-me-which-is-everyone attitude gets you.

So at this point it’s pretty clear; we’ve established that Yoda is dumb as hell. But, with the Jedi fallen and evil taking control of the galaxy, and after two decades of exile, he must have had some time to reflect on what he’s done wrong, right? Wrong.

  PART IV: YOU THINK I FUCKED YOU UP? WAIT ‘TIL I FUCK THE REST OF THE FAMILY UP

 So here we are. It’s 19 BBY and Anakin has gone on a bloody killing spree. Palpatine’s claimed himself as the Emperor and the galaxy’s in turmoil. Meanwhile, Yoda’s waiting on the asteroid of Polis Massa in relative safety waiting patiently on Kenobi’s arrival. And then here comes Obi-Wan carrying a half-choked-to-death Padme Amidala into the operating room because Jesus Christ she’s giving birth. We all know how the story goes. Padme dies, leaving her two children in the hands of Bail, Obi-Wan and Yoda. Yoda, being the complete genius he is, offers to split the children up, which strategically isn’t a bad move. But I can guarantee you, if Padme was still alive and Anakin were there, together they would’ve bashed Yoda’s brains out. Splitting the two most important children in the galaxy up is completely dishonouring Padme’s wishes, and there is no way she would approve of that. Anakin simply would’ve gutted Yoda before he had the chance to finish.

So twenty something years go by, and Luke somehow makes his way to Yoda, who has spent the last two decades in exile. Classic Yoda, taking the coward’s way out. Ahsoka and Kannan, two of the last Jedi who escaped Order 66 decided not to be cowards and put their skills to good use, fighting in the rebellion. They didn’t hide; instead they knew they had military experience and could use their forces to do good in the galaxy and fight the Empire. Even Obi-Wan had a good reason for remaining in exile; he had to look over one of the most powerful force users and make sure he was kept safe. But Yoda, good old Yoda. He had literally no reason for being in exile, and instead of fighting, he cowered.

Anyways, Luke decides he wants a real Jedi to train him! Yay! It’s all fun and games ‘til we realise that Yoda has not learnt a single. Damn. Lesson. I kid you fucking not. This dude literally had 20 years to reflect on what could have possibly gone wrong with his mentoring so, when the opportunity arises again to teach, he wouldn’t fuck it up. But no.

Arguably Yoda’s biggest fuck up with Anakin was that, instead of teaching Anakin that it’s okay to have attachments and to love as long as you don’t let them control your actions, he taught him that attachments were evil and they were a direct link to the Dark Side. Not only is this completely false, but Yoda knew better than to say this to Anakin, of all people. The whole damn Order knew how attached Anakin became to people and honestly, he wasn’t even discrete about it. So why the hell would Yoda be encouraging Anakin to leave his friends behind for the greater good? It was because of this philosophy that had been constantly rammed into Skywalker’s head that he fell. Instead of helping Anakin acknowledge his emotions so he can deal with them in a healthy manner, Yoda tells him to just push them down, or “release them into the Force,” whatever the fuck that means. If Anakin had been taught to embrace his feelings instead of pushing them down to the point of explosion, he wouldn’t have fallen.

So, we’ve established that it was pretty much Yoda and the Jedi’s teachings that caused the galaxy to fall into a period of turmoil, even if it was indirect and unintentional. By this point, two decades on when Luke lands (or rather, crashes) onto Yoda’s doorstep, the piece of shit gargoyle should have figured out what went wrong with this teachings and how to fix it, like any good teacher would. Bitch, you thought.

Instead, Yoda does the exact same shit that got him there in the first place. Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it, right?

I’ll give it to the little guy; he started out alright, even if his old philosophies make literally zero sense. “Do or do not, there is no try,” what the fuck, you can’t do something without trying to do it, that’s literally how you do something. That’s always pissed me off, but anyways. It’s when the events of Cloud City start rolling in is where the problem arises. Luke comes to Yoda, does a bit of training, etcetera. Yoda tells him to look deep into the force, where Luke then sees a vision of his friends in grave peril in Cloud City. He expresses these concerns to his little green mentor, telling him Leia and Han need him and he must go to save them.

Its at this point where Yoda goes, “Fuck it. Esketit, bitch.”

It’s legitimately like Yoda doesn’t even give a single fuck at this point. I mean, who cares your training fucked up this boy’s dad, let’s just do it all over again! So, much to Luke’s chagrin, Yoda tells him he must complete his training and stay. “You must not go,” he tells him, before lifting his ship and submerging it into the swamp water. Man, what a fucking dick move.

Guess he realised how shitty that was so he later takes the ship back out. Luke decides he’s had enough with this goblin-lookin’ ass and starts departing for Bespin. Once again Yoda, now with ghost Obi’s help, tries in a desperate final move to make Luke stay, telling him he must complete his training and that only a fully-fledged Jedi Knight will have a chance at defeating Vader. Luke says he doesn’t give a fuck, he just wants to save his friends, to which Yoda replies he must sacrifice them if Luke honours what they fight for. Luke’s pretty pissed by this and, in true Skywalker manner, disobeys the two Jedi and leaves anyways, and rightly so. If someone told me I had to let my friends die horrible deaths just so I can stay in some shitty swamp I’d pummel them.

That sounds rather familiar, actually. Yoda telling someone to leave his friends behind for the greater good. Oh, wait! That’s exactly what he said to Anakin before the poor dude fucked up the entire galaxy. But, of course, Yoda doesn’t give a flying fuck about that, now does he?

   PART V: OTHER STUFF THAT PROVES HOW SHITTY HE IS

 So, at this point we’ve pretty much analysed most of the dumb shit Yoda has pulled that we know of in canon, but there’s a heap more. If I were to go into depth with everything, this would become a 10,000 word essay real quick, so let’s just skim over some points:

 ·         Yoda’s a damn big hypocrite. I know I’ve already stated this in one context, but here’s another; Yoda wants complete loyalty to the Jedi and their morals, but isn't loyalty a type of attachment? Yoda gets real upset when people don’t show complete and utter adherence to the Code. So, I’m honestly kind of confused; is he encouraging attachment or not?

 ·         Here’s another context in which he’s a hypocritical bastard; in regards to age, he claimed Anakin was too old to be a Jedi at age nine. But according to this source, Yoda did not become a Jedi until he was an adult. And seeing as his species live for about nine hundred years, I’d say it’s pretty safe to assume he became a Jedi after at least one hundred years of living. So Yoda can shut the fuck up, thanks.

 ·         Yoda is a homophobe. This statement is a pretty well-known fact around fandom, so I don’t really need to go into specifics here besides mentioning that he fucked over Ahsoka and Luke, both known gays, and beat Artoo with a stick, an iconic droid lesbian.

 ·         Yoda was responsible for directly exploiting Obi-Wan’s naivety and lack of experience so he could be used as a mere tool. He knighted Obi-Wan at too young of an age and didn't let him grieve properly, sticking him with a former slave and hoping things would turn out just fine. Anakin had just been taken from his mother, and needed time to get used to being a (relatively, in a sense) free boy and Jedi protocol. Yoda repeatedly forced Obi into situations where he had to ignore his own good judgement and attachment to Anakin just so he could follow the Council’s orders.

   So, in short, I think it’s pretty clear that we’ve noted Yoda is Star Wars’ biggest asshole.

@anti-yoda

[dawnofspeed]

so i went and saw ‘justice league’ with my li’l bro and bestie tonight.

spoilers ahead.

i want to preface my entire thing with saying that lately i’ve felt conflicted about joss wheedon’s work (and even unrelated with the deadpool 2 movie) because of joss’ whole ‘i’m a feminist but the reason i’ve been horrible to women is the patriarchy’ (and with deadpool 2 the whole... forcing a stunt person to do a stunt they weren’t ready for and got them killed).  But also as a filmmaker i know that there are tons of people who work on these films that have nothing to do with those things, so i’ve decided to keep them at the back of my mind and just focus on these slightly problematic films on their own merit. (no i won’t talk about dp2 in this. it’s just been on my mind bc i saw the new trailer and spoke to my bestie, another film graduate, about the issues with stuff tonight and yeah. soz.) ALSO PLEASE NOTE THAT THE FOLLOWING ARE OPINIONS. if you like something i don’t, that’s great. all the power to you. i am literally just writing thoughts and opinions and i only just finished a film degree so... y’know. not an expert.

moving on.

i loved a lot of this movie. as a whole it was a great ensemble piece. the cast was solid, the acting was solid, the script was solid. the plot worked well. i think it accomplished setting up the justice league, introducing us to characters and their backstories while driving the story forward. i also liked that it really seemed to know its source material and kept to the actual point- superhero movies shouldn’t be completely dark. they can be fun, they can be funny, they can be hopeful. whatever problems i have with joss wheedon as a person and the things he’s said and done, i think he can write and direct well. and he knows what he’s doing. the few women in the film he also balanced well. i didn’t feel like he was ‘buffy’ing any of them (something he sorta did with kitty pryde in his astonishing x-men, as much as i loved it. although that could also be because buffy was sorta based off kitty, joss’ fave x-men character). 

i enjoyed all most of the characters. the whole justice league was great (alfred included, c’mon, he’s totally a team member at this point). i do think that diana was different in this film than her wonder woman one, there was just a different tone but you can also kinda just explain that away as this is post-steve trevor, it’s been a while since the events of ww, and that’s just what it is now. towards the end of the movie it felt more tonally in sync with her in ww, so that may be it. also bats pushing diana to lead the team? i loved that.  i’ve never known much about victor but i found his story intriguing in this, he was fun, and my reservations about him being in the flash film are totally squashed now. i maintain that batfleck is my favourite of all batmen. this movie sealed it for me and i definitely enjoy his performance more than any that came before him. i mean. i enjoyed michael keaton but he was just never totally batman for me. clark was SO much better in this movie. he was light, and funny, and 100% the superman i actually love. i didn’t want him brought back to life and then afterwards?? i was like?? nah, you’re right, clark IS a good guy. how have i never seen this before? i just hated dceu superman before this film. arthur curry is cool. i have never been a massive aquaman fan. i didn’t hate atlantis. but i just... didn’t really care? then. they made him cool, and fun, and so much potential. i’m intrigued about his backstory. i wanna know more. i wanna unpack his personality. just. wow.  but the standout? barry all the way. i was a bit anxious about how they were going to do it. i love ezra, but we’ve seen so many iterations of barry at this point that i was just really worried about what aspects they’d keep and how they’d navigate his background and his powers. but they did an amazing job. they kept his sense of humour while also maintaining his kindness, his intelligence, his zest for life and i love how even when he’s terrified he goes out of his way to do the right thing. added to his ‘i assume he’s an attractive jewish guy’ when he’s talking about his security footage. i just. love him. i do think some of his qualities are wally west?? like??? but my brother kept insisting that in the early comics barry was very playful and jokey, not just puns and dad jokes, so i’m inclined to believe him.  also alfred was a+++ i love him. alfred forever. so that clears up most of the mains. plot? well i’m gonna be honest. i know... very little about darkseid and any of that stuff in the comics. i did think it was a great way to bring in both atlantians and amazons. and that cheeky green lantern reference at the beginning. and my brother swears he saw hercules but i only know marvel’s hercules so?? i??? dunno???? i also think it had high stakes, a ticking time frame, gave them the ability to bring superman back AND create a justice league. all while never trying to cram more than one actual plotline into a film. (like. a LOT of other dc movies.) i was happy with it. i never felt like it ran too long or i got bored or any of that so i’m. yeah. great.  also loved that no one was forced into a freakin’ love interest or hampered from saving the world or anything by romance. did think that clark waited way too long to meet up with them for the end battle. like. did he spend all that time making a new goddamn suit? what? got a hair cut? like. why did it take you so long? you’re SUPERMAN. lois told you ages ago to get moving and help out. did you spend all that time like chatting with your mum? also, sidenote: thank you trailers for not spoiling this film. i didn’t expect the superman rebirth. i went in just knowing the jl was gonna kick butt somewhere and we were gonna get introduced to them all. the marketing on this film was spot on, and i loved that surprise and being pulled through the whole movie trying to guess what the hell was gonna happen. double thumbs up. ok. i will go over the things i didn’t like. which were very few. but first i kinda wanna talk about a few other cast/character things. i’m gonna be honest. not a massive fan of amy adams as lois lane. besides the fact that to me she doesn’t look like lois lane, and doesn’t embody (TO ME) anything that lois does... she also (TO ME) doesn’t have any chemistry with henry cavill. i don’t feel a thing. sometimes i might be like awwwww, cute. but that’s more of the situation rather than any emotions i get off of them. but that’s kinda nitpicky here as she was already cast as that character and no one was going to change that for the justice league. i will admit i felt more for her in this film than any of the others, and i enjoyed her more than in the others. but she was still... not lois.  now... amber heard as mera. i will admit that amber looks like mera. and i enjoyed her limited performance and i’m sure she’ll do a great job in the aquaman film and i hold nothing against her. but. if arthur curry doesn’t need to look like comic arthur curry than. why does mera? we only had three women in the whole movie, really. two had limited parts. mera could have been a woc. she could have been not supermodel gorgeous as amber is. (i love amber i do but... who looks that goddamn gorgeous?) already the entire film felt like impossible standards of women. the amazons are varied in body shapes yes, but those costumes. then mera is AMBER. and gal is. gal. i just. there are so many races on earth. asian and hispanic women (and people) exist. not that the movie... shows that... at all.  in fact, between the dceu and the mcu there’s one hispanic character on the movie screen. and he isn’t even a superhero (yeah, the friend of antman’s. and no i’m not counting netflix. that’s not a movie screen. yes rosario dawson is awesome.) heck the cw only added a hispanic woman in the last year. before that cisco was pretty much on his lonesome. wait. that might not be right. i’m sure arrow had a guest star that moved to lot... meh. i don’t keep up anymore.  all i’m saying is... if mera had been cast woc then that would have continued right on through to aquaman too.  but i have nothing against both amber and amy. they’re doing their jobs and i wish them all the best and i will try and enjoy it as much as possible.  my few criticisms:

- ... not a big fan of the costume design. i was so confused about wonder woman’s until i remembered it was probably the one from bvs which i hated. i have no idea what was happening with superman’s. batman’s was fine. flash was fine. cyborg’s was fine. loved aquaman’s (and mera’s). the amazonians? what? why???? you could tell it was a male designer. every vital organ was pretty much on show and it was all sexy, just like how wonder woman’s skirt was shortened and the front was like almost a loincloth. just. no. 

- production design was ok? like there were very few standouts to me. batcave was pretty good, the flash cave, and anything with aquaman’s fishing village. pretty sure that was filmed in new zealand tho and those guys are on point with their pd. studying their stuff over there, man. pd orgasm tbh. ever since lord of the rings those guys are just amazing.

- camera work was great at times and then just weird in others. i think that had a lot to do with cgi demands, which i’ll get to in a minute. 

- the lighting? i mean yes, each scene requires different lighting depending on the place, time of day, people and props... but. there’s this one scene in the field with clark and lois and i was like. confused because it felt like they got first year film students to light it. it was off. and if they were trying to reproduce a field at sunset in a studio with green screen that might make sense but to me it didn’t feel like a gs scene. 

- which brings me to my next point. cgi and green screen. there felt like a lot of it in the movie. pretty sure the fight after clark is revived is green screen. the entire last battle has so much cgi that i felt like it was avengers on steroids. also kinda felt like i was watching a video game with like real people pasted in. and while i get WHY it was like that i also felt like. there could have been ways to do it differently. when i watch stranger things i know there’s cgi. but i never get that feeling, that i’m watching a video game. which is important. because i want to stay sunk into the film. not be thrown out and feel like a different medium has taken over. my challenge for jl2? keep me in the film. find a way to make the sfx stay real. possibly a nitpick but like i said, this is my opinion. so that’s it. that’s my long ass dissection and feels and thoughts. i am so looking forward to every solo movie and also being introduced to iris west and atlantis more. im me or d/cord if you wanna chat about anything or if we’re not pals you can send me a q via askbox.