#but yes Coffee Shop AUs may in fact be 'if only retail was REALLY like this' wish fulfillment

[thevalicemultiverse]

People who read and write Coffee Shop AUs have never worked in Coffee Shops before, otherwise every single one of those fics would be a snuff massacre fic

Smiler: [raising an eyebrow] I work in a coffee shop, and I don't want to murder every customer.

Alice: To be fair, Smiler, you're a bit of an outlier when it comes to how naturally cheery you are. . .that being said, there's a case to be made for coffee shop employees writing about what they WISH their jobs were like. For example, no Karens. Unless they have a special dramatic purpose.

Victor: [deadpan] Like giving your partner a really bad last ten minutes of their shift before they get to leave?

Smiler: I choose to look at it as the universe pre-warning me what your mother is like before I "officially" met her.

[trixystix]

Fakiru Week 2017 Day 1: Silver

So, for Fakiru week this year, I’m doing a 7-part modern Pride and Prejudice AU I’ve been thinking about for some time now.  :3 I hope you’ll enjoy, and I’m sorry that each of these chapters are late :x

Also, this is all self-indulgent so like.  I’m sorry :x

Ahiru and her sisters weren't born with silver spoons in their mouths.

On the contrary, life with the Featherbottoms was more like giant ice cream scoopers, aprons stained with crepe batter, and a limit to only two free samples per customer because running a parlor was expensive business.

... Ahiru thought it rather silly to limit them to two samples each, since barely anyone ever came in anymore.

Their little ice cream and crepe parlor sat on the eastern end of a dismally failing outdoor mall.  Most stores sat empty.  Other lots housed some random boutiques and the occasional rug store bound to be out of there by the next quarter.  Ahiru swore she saw tumbleweed brush past the glass paneled doors at least once a week.

Her parents, well-meaning and ridiculous as they were, insisted that their big break was coming---that Rue's balletic talent ("her one redeeming quality!" they'd say, much to Ahiru's chagrin) would carry them off into comfort and riches eventually, and persisted with keeping this little shop going as long as possible (if only so they wouldn't lose the apartment).  Not without cutting corners, though: they swapped out fresh strawberries for preserves, removed avocado from all their savory crepes, convinced Ahiru to make smaller scoops per order, and other such minor details that soon coalesced into one giant mess of a business.

"Rue!!" came the shrill sing-song of their mother's squawking, "Let your sisters handle the shop today!  You must keep to your lessons!  I've heard from your instructors that you've been focusing far less lately!"

Rue frowned impatiently, stubbornly pulling her thick hair into a tight bun.  "Ahiru will be left alone here."

"I can handle it!" Ahiru said brightly from her spot in front of the display glass, wiping at the window above the bins of ice cream.  Though her parents saw Rue's dancing as a way out of their struggles, Ahiru knew that her older sister genuinely felt her happiest in her pointe shoes.  "I don't think it's gonna get busy!  And Pique and Lilie are coming in this afternoon, that's what they said!"

Rue gave Ahiru a withering stare.  

Ahiru's expression wilted.  "O-Okay, so they're not coming in.  But still, it'll be okay, won't it?  I know how everything is done!"

"Heavens, no!" Mrs. Featherbottom gasped, utterly scandalized, "The whole place would fall to pieces, and we'd be left with absolutely nothing!  We'll be forced onto the streets: beggars!  Spinsters!"

Ahiru blinked owlishly.  "Spinsters?"

"Spinsters!"

"Oh."  Was Ahiru really that bad with the store upkeep?

Rue turned her nose up, her lips pursing, and to their mother, she might've looked haughty.  But Ahiru caught the subtle slump in Rue's poised shoulders.  "Mother, I'll stay here until Pique or Lilie comes to relieve me.  I'll make up the lessons on my next day off."

"Well, be sure that one of those two comes here soon!  The darlings---they work so hard and have such hefty schedules!  But we must balance our priorities, after all!  And Rue, you cannot have your talents go to waste!"

Rue took her spot at the crepe station while Ahiru sampled the strawberry flavor.  Minutes passed.  No customers, as expected.

So, Ahiru bumped the volume on the speakers and skidded across the tile floor, a mop her guitar and an ice cream scooper as a microphone.  Rue gave her that same, tiny smile, the one that said, "you're so silly, I love you, little sister," and rose to the tips of her non-slip shoes to twirl into a dance behind the counter.

Working wasn't always that bad.

Overcast weather over an outdoor mall always promised slow days.  They simply got used to the lack of customers in the fall.  Crisp, cloudy, and cool, this was the quiet season (or at least, quieter than usual).

These moments were rather nice, despite the fact that their days in this business were numbered if things kept on as they were.

Ahiru tried to appreciate it all for what it was.

Then, on one such gloomy day, the door opened over the lull of humming freezers and retail music.  And Ahiru would've swooned at their new customer if she wasn't distracted by the way Rue shyly glanced away and tucked a loose strand of hair over her ear.

He was lovely, with warm, golden eyes and hair of pearl---the sort of face that would make Pique and Lilie run in screeching.  And his smile was sweet and genuine.  Ahiru's own customer-service grin came quite easy to her in his presence.

Rue didn't even look him in the eye.  Ahiru took note of this.

"Hello!  I didn't know there was an ice cream place here!"

"Hi there!  Um, would you like a free sample, sir?" Ahiru offered, waving from behind the glass and hopping up onto the step stool so she could see him clearly.  He dressed smartly---so different from anyone else in these suburbs.  A nice tweed jacket, a crisp, white button-up ...

He shook his head politely.  "No, but thank you very much for the offer.  It's rather chilly, actually.  Do you happen to serve coffee?"

"Yes, of course!"

"I'd like one please.  Oh!"  He spotted the menu on the back wall.  "And crepes!  I love crepes!"

Rue shifted, keeping her expression hidden.  Ahiru's smile grew mischievous.  "Aaaah, of course!  Go ahead and order with Rue over there!  She makes really, really good ones!  I'll get your coffee!"

"Thank you so much."

Forced to greet him now, Rue kept her expression carefully controlled, an even, pleasant smile for a customer.  But Ahiru, ever-so-attentive to her older sister's habits, caught the way she gripped her apron.

The man's eyes widened, and he paused in his step, his lips parting in awe at the sight of Rue.

Ahiru giddily went about making a fresh brew, biting her lip and trying not to listen in as Rue and this new gentleman made pleasantries.

"Do you have any recommendations, Miss Rue?"

"Would you like something savory, perhaps lunch, sir?  Or something sweet?"

"... I'd very much like something sweet."

"Hm.  Then may I suggest the strawberries and nutella?"

"That sounds delightful."

Okay, maybe Ahiru was reading way too much into it.  But ... this was super cute.  

As the young man intentionally carried on conversation while Rue set to making his crepe, the door swung open once more, causing Ahiru to almost spill the contents of the paper cup in her hands.

"Dammit, Autor, the numbers aren't adding up!  We pay you for a reason, don't we?!"

The deep, frustrated timbre drowned out the sweet discussion occurring on the other side of the parlor.  He spat the words into his phone, his free hand shoved deep into the pocket of his slacks.  His blazer and shirt sleeves were rolled up to his elbows, a tie undone and hanging loose from his collar.  With sharp, green eyes and rich, dark skin, Ahiru would've found him stupidly attractive.

You know.  If not for the way his lips curled into a snarl and how he barked into his phone like it was the nastiest thing in the world.  Ahiru didn't bother to hide her frown.

"Well, fix it!"  He glanced up from his phone only to look in the other man's direction.

The sweet, good, much-nicer-and-altogether-better person gave him a sheepish smile and a shrug.

He rolled his eyes.  "Look, Autor, I'll call you back, and when I do, you've better have ironed out everything we just discussed."  He pulled his phone from his ear and tapped it with an impatient thumb.  "Mytho, what are you---"

"They have crepes, Fakir!  I haven't had a crepe in so long!"

"Are you seriously---"

"They have coffee, too."

"Fakir" frowned, noticing the way "Mytho" leaned in and smiled with gentle affection toward the woman making his crepe.  Without passing Ahiru a single glance, he scoffed and sat at the table next to the window.  "Coffee, then.  Black.  Fresh-brewed.  I don't want leftovers."

Ahiru's jaw dropped.  Well.  Well.  WELL!

As Fakir tapped and scrolled angrily at his phone, Mytho cleared his throat and leaned toward Rue again.  "I'm so sorry.  He's not usually like this.  He's just having a rather stressful day."

"So I see," Rue muttered in reply, spreading nutella along the crepe's surface.

Meanwhile, Ahiru grit her teeth.  Fine.  Fine.  Fresh-brewed, just for Mr. Cranky-Pants.  He would have the best coffee in the world.  It would be the most delicious, most delectable, best shot of caffeine he'd ever have in his life, and probably go on to keep being a jerk and how in the world were these two people even acquainted?

She passed Mytho his coffee first with a smile---which he returned with a quiet thanks and an apology.  Then, she placed the other coffee---THE BEST COFFEE EVER---onto the counter.

"Your coffee's ready."

He kept on tapping at his phone.

"Um.  Sir?"

He scowled and scrolled.

"Siiiir?"

Still nothing.

"AHEM."

When he refused to acknowledge even that, she grabbed the best coffee ever and stomped around the counter toward his table.  She pointedly placed it down right in between his face and that poor, abused phone screen.  "Your coffee's ready, sir!  Black, freshly brewed, super delicious, and the best ever!  Sugar and cream are at the counter!"

He scowled and finally looked up at her.  "Hey, watch it---"

Her lips pursed as he paused.  His brow unfurrowed just slightly, the tenseness in his jaw loosening.

Her cheeks heated and she gulped.

Then, she shook her head and stalked off back around the counter with a huff.  Okay, so he had a staring problem, too.  She'd had some lousy customers before, but this guy really took the cake!

"Miss Ahiru," Mytho said, walking toward the register with coffee in one hand and crepe box in the other, a skip in his step and a twinkle in his eye.  "Rue tells me you've been in business here for many years.  How do you like it?  How's the area?  Thinking of renting one of these empty stores."

Ahiru prepared to reply with enthusiasm, but that Fakir butted in.  "You've seen it already, Mytho.  This place is dead.  Numbers are dropping constantly."

"Ahem!"  Ahiru rang him up with perky jubilance, her grin wide.  "I like it here!  It's nice and quiet and we get to meet nice people who walk their dogs, and we have a Halloween store that shows up every year and a tree-lighting ceremony during holidays!  So, with a little imagination, it's a great place!  Numbers aren’t everything!”

She dared to look around Mytho to throw a triumphant grin in that Fakir's direction.

... She was mildly surprised to see that he wasn't scowling.

"Well, that's good to hear!"  Mytho paid without further incident, before stepping toward the crepe station.  "Miss Rue ... thank you for your time.  I'll ... I'd like to try other crepes again soon!"

She smiled a little, polite and even.  "We look forward to it."

As he took his leave, Ahiru called out to Fakir, her grin super-duper wide.  "And yours is 2.50 plus tax!"

He stood and approached the register.

Hoo boy.

Okay, he was tall.

She readied herself for some kind of mean spirited comment or grumpy complaint, but all he did was hand her a ten before following Mytho out the door.

The sisters were left in silence.

Until Ahiru spoke, shaking off that weird warmth that filled her cheeks under that Fakir's piercing gaze.  "Ugh.  If he ever comes in again, I'm gonna kick his butt."

"Please do.  Looks like he left you a big tip, though," Rue countered.

"I don't want his dumb tip!  Did you see the way he spoke to Mytho?  And, and, and me, and the person on the phone!  Hmph, I wish that stupid silver spoon in his mouth stopped him from talking!"

"How could anyone like Mytho be in business with someone like that?"

At this, Ahiru felt her mood lighten.

"... Mytho was really nice, huh, Rue?"

"... Oh, stop it."

Mytho nibbled delightedly at his crepe, but sighed as he glanced up and down the pathetic halls of the outdoor mall.  "... You're right, though.  This area ... isn't all that promising when you look at it now.  Other than that delightful ice cream place."

Fakir rolled his eyes.

But numbers aren't everything.

Tumbleweed brushed against the toe of his polished shoe and he kicked at it.

And after another moment, he looked up, fighting the urge to follow his friend's gaze back to the parlor a small distance away.  With a little imagination ...

"... No.  There's potential here.  I see it."