#but yeah. i know i shouldn't trust how i feel past 9 pm but I've been feeling this for a while now so whatever
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wereh0gz · 2 months ago
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Not feeling great abt some of my creative endeavors rn
#ramblings#neg#specifically abt project: new moon#i can feel myself actively losing interest in continuing to write for it#like the main story is already out there and that's fine#but even tho i have ideas for oneshots and stuff to introduce more characters (like those redesigns for rouge and shadow i did a while ago)#it just. doesn't feel worth continuing. idk why#i guess it might be the lack of interest for my writing in general#or maybe project: new moon just. isn't that great#which is fine the point of the project was to do it for fun not to make something objectively good#but ig i'm just. not feeling it anymore? i don't feel satisfied with it like i did when i finished writing it#i still love my ocs and the redesigns i did of canon characters for it#and i'm glad i got the story i've had in my head since i was like 12 out there. even if it's very different from how i first envisioned it#but. i really just wanna put it to rest#i really don't feel like i can promise any more writing for it. not like anybody cared abt it anyway besides like 3-4 ppl + myself#idk man i wanna move on from it. i have other stuff i wanna write that i feel guilty for not doing#bc i'd said i'd write more for project: new moon and still haven't#i think i'd be happier if i let the fanfic go and just draw my ocs and my redesigns when i feel like it#without worrying abt the fic anymore#bc frankly ever since writing the epilogue my heart just didn't feel like it was in it#thinking abt it felt like a chore more than anything. so maybe it'd be for the best to just leave it as it is#that comic i said i'd write is still happening tho i still really wanna do it#but that's different from writing fanfic so#anyway. might turn the project: new moon blog into a general writing blog#if i finish the corrupted au fic i'm currently working on. idk yet we'll see#but yeah. i know i shouldn't trust how i feel past 9 pm but I've been feeling this for a while now so whatever#i think i should've seen this coming in retrospect. pretty much everything i do that isn't just art never gets much traction anyway#can't say i'm really giving up on it considering it's TECHNICALLY complete#but the way things are going feels almost exactly like the rp and ask blogs i've tried to run in the past#idk man. i gotta stop thinking abt this before the vague feelings of inadequacy spiral into something worse. goodnight
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jising-jisang-jisung · 6 years ago
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Love Her | Lee Donghyuck (Haechan)
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A/n: Kinda based off the song Love Her by the Jonas Brothers. The first of my little series for the dreamies. Hope you like it.
Genre: angst? fluff
Word count: 1.5k
~~~~~~
[2:47 am]
Demon sunshine 🌻: hey, y/n, anyone ask you to prom???
You: you already know the answer to that question
You: dont rub it in :,(
Demon sunshine 🌻: it's okay. I'm probably going alone too.
You: what?? But tons of girls asked you.
[read 3:02 am]
Your best friend didn't respond to your text and you decided it was already late enough. However, that night, amongst your slumber, you devised a great plan- or rather idea- that you should just ask Donghyuck to prom so you both can just go together. I mean, you probably would be attending it together anyways so what difference does it make. Now, you just get to tell people that you have a date.
That morning you saw Donghyuck loitering by your locker, as usual. "Hey Hyuckie! What if I just ask you to prom?" You assumed he would love the idea. What's not to like? He'd be going to prom with his best friend either way and who doesn't love their best friend?
"That's literally the worst idea I've ever heard." I guess Donghyuck doesn't love his best friend. "If you ask me, I'll be so embarrassed. I'll say no, just like I did to everyone else."
You opened your mouth but realized you had nothing to say. Nevermind your calculus textbook, you just left your locker and headed towards your class. For the rest of the day, Hyuck was no where to be found. This was lucky for you because you were also avoiding him. He had been cranky for the past few days and now he's being mean to you for no reason!! You were sick of his crap to say the least. Even at lunch, he was missing. Your heart lowkey hurt, but like you weren't going to seek him out. He is the one who needed to come find you to apologize to.
He never did. Prom was just a few days away and Donghyuck hasn't texted you since that night. In school, he avoids you. You guess that you'll never find out what you did to turn him off. Other than offer to go to prom with him, that is.
Well, at this point, you didn't care what Donghyuck did with his life. He obviously doesn't want to be friends anymore so you weren't going to make him.
[9:23 pm]
You: I still don't have a date... pleeeaassseee go with me to prom??? Pretty please >.>
Poison drinker: y/n, I already told you that I'm going with Jules. I'm really sorry but you know I cant...
Poison drinker: try Jeno tho. He doesn't have a date yet either and we both know how week he is if you pout about it
You: okayyy I understand.. but thanks for the advice!! Operation Make Jeno Feel Bad For Y/N is a go!
Poison drinker: goodluck!! Go get urself a date
You lied down on your bed, thinking about asking your other friend, Jeno. Maybe you just shouldn't go to prom. Hyuck will be there and you're still upset with him. Who cares anyway. It's just prom. There are more important things like college aps and SATs. At least, that's what you tried to convince yourself.
[10:11 pm]
(Un)funny clown: hey, y/n!! Jaemin said you were looking for a prom date?? Well, if you still need one, so do i... we could go together as friends if you're interested.
Forget what you were thinking about not going. You've changed your mind. You are going to prom. And you are going to be the hottest bitch their. Wait no, you ain't no bitch, sis you a skinny queen!!
[10:13 pm]
You: Jeno!!! I would love to go to prom with you. Thanks so much for asking. I really didnt want to go alone so now I'm excited :D
You plugged your phone in next to your bed and drifted into a peaceful sleep.
Jeno came to pick you up for prom and you went with Jaemin and his date too. The whole group went together, minus Donghyuck. You saw him from across the dance floor. He was leaning on the wall, glaring at you. What is his problem? He acts like he hates you and over what? You suggesting to ask him to prom? He was being unbelievable. You decided to ignore him and continue to dance with your date and other friends. You looked back over to where Donghyuck had been standing but he was no where to be seen. Jeno seemed to pick up on what had happened and silently asked if you wanted to leave.
"No, no. I'm fine. I'm just gonna go get some water," you tried to reassure him.
"I'll come with. It is really hot on the dance floor."
"That's just Jaemin," you smiled at your not funny joke, earning you a pinch on the arm from Jeno.
"I don't wanna talk about that right now. He's here with a date."
As you turned back to continue walking towards the refreshments you accidently bump into someone.
"Hey, dude watch where y- oh I'm sorry. I should've been looking. Uh..." Donghyuck looks down at the ground as he begins to run away in the opposite direction you were heading. You turned back to Jeno to send him a questioning look but he nodded his head, gesturing to Hyuck.
"Go talk to him. Please, y/n, you are the only one that can fix this. Trust me, the rest of us have tried. He only listens to you."
Your worries came back as you still felt empathy for your best friend. Sure he was being a jerk, but Jeno seems to know why. And he also seems to think that it isn't as bad as you feel it is. So, you reluctantly head after your best friend.
"Hey. Are you okay?"
"Oh! Yeah sorry. You startled me." He was sitting in the corner of the entrance, where nobody else was. He probably just wanted to be alone. When he lifted his eyes, ever so briefly, to meet yours, you saw the shiny streaks down his face.
"Were you crying?" Without thinking, you naturally grabbed his face, wiping away the remaining tears. "It's okay if you were. I've seen you cry 100 times."
"I'm sorry, y/n. I'm such an idiot."
"Yeah you are. But what specific reason were you an idiot for this time?" He murmured a response under his breath but it was incoherent to you. "Sorry, I- I didn't quite catch that."
"Because I- I just-" he began to cry again.
"It's alright. You don't have to tell me if it's too hard."
"Why are you so wonderful? I've been such a douche lately and you didn't deserve that. Nonetheless, here you are now being so kind to me. Why?"
"Well, even if we aren't being friendly with each other at the moment. You're still my best friend."
"I don't want to be."
He turned his head. Now he was staring at you with a glint in his eyes. Being the dummy you are, you misunderstood what he was implying.
"You- you don't want to be my friend anymore? I mean, if that's what you want. If that will make you feel better then it's okay." Your eyes began to fill with tears, mimicking Donghyuck's minutes earlier.
"No. I don't want to be your friend." He lifted your chin to meet your gaze. "I want to be more. What I tried to say earlier, I think I can say it now." He took a deep breath before he continued. "I love you, y/n." You stood in silence, unsure of how to react to his confession. "And it's perfectly fine if you don't reciprocate my feelings. I just- I said no to everyone who asked me to prom because I wanted to ask you. But, when you said that you wanted to ask me, I got embarrassed. I shouldn't have acted the way I did. I'm so so sorry, y/n. Please forgive me."
"Hey Hyuckie?" He looked up at you. "Will you go to prom with me?" He nodded his head quickly as you grabbed his hand and dragged him back to the dance floor where the rest of your friends were waiting.
"Hey! What happened? Are you guys friends again?"
"Yeah, I apologized. You know she's always right," Hyuck explained.
"But were not friends," you retorted.
"Wait, what do you-" and before Donghyuck could finish his sentence, you sneaked a peck at his lips.
"You confessed to me. What did you think would happen?"
"Yeah, but you never said you loved me back."
"I love you too, Hyuckie."
The rest of the night was spent busting down on the dancefloor while all your friends made fun of you and your now boyfriend for being complete idiots (mainly him but go off I guess). Afterwards you went back to his house to watch movies, cuddle, and maybe makeout for a few hours.
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