#but what if its not up to me qnd someone 3lse decides for me and im SOL cos id have an involuntary on my record fuck
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On another note off of that it really goes to show me how important me being able to not do a lot of those things in public anymore is if shit like that is viewed by neurotypicals as evil and wrong.
#kinda scared cos ive started stammering again around people and what if people start to dislike me/get scared of me for that stuff#what if i start slamming my head into things again in front of people and i cant atop myself and they get freaked out and dont wanna be ...#around me anymore#what if i scratch off a big ass patch of skin and someone im talking to sees it and gets freaked out#what the fuck do i do then? how do i stop it#im gonna stop thinking about this for rn cos im starting to get freaked out and i really really dont need that 2nite#i dont wanna go back to a mental hospital i dont wanna get stuck in inpatient i dont think that would be helpful#but what if its not up to me qnd someone 3lse decides for me and im SOL cos id have an involuntary on my record fuck
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