#but to the people who made these gifs: I love you I love you I love you

[nabi-unveiled]

Flipping the Characters in Futtara Doshaburi

This show is a vibe, and I'm vibing with it. I'm loving everything about these two lonely people desperately seeking intimacy. Watching episode four in the car while the rain poured around me only added to the vibe. That said, being in the car means I can't do my normal screenshot process so semi-relevant gifs it is.

We start with Hagiwara descending into the depths. I mentioned after episode 3 that he still had a more positive outlook on his circumstances. But he's now on his way into the hole where he won't be able to gloss over his unhappiness. Sei is already in the hole. He has been there for a while, he knows he's there, and he's somewhat resigned himself to it.

This change in Hagiwara's attitude is reflected in our aesthetics too. While Hagiwara's home had bright and warm elements last episode, the door to his house is cold and dark after their dinner. It's no longer welcoming. The restaurant is where the warm colors resided.

However, the truly interesting thing to me about this show is in how much this show has flipped the character expectations.

It's flipped the idea of "good guys" and "bad guys" - particularly in a drama that's definitely leading towards cheating. It's pretty standard fair in a cheating drama for the partners to be painted as not caring or evil. But as Hiragawa and Sei make clear in their exchange after the meal, nobody really is in the wrong (yet). It's really unfair to all of them. I actually think Sei's partner has the shortest end of this stick thus far, but that's a different discussion.

The partners of our leads are caring. They cook for our leads. They clean up for our leads. They are kind. But they offer companionship, not sex. This makes them "cruel". It's cruel to be kind.

Our leads actually have only shown minimal considerations towards their partner. Sei sprayed perfume and Hiragawa goes to his girlfriend's social events, but they aren't the ones doing the major acts of service. The have mainly shown care to each other, not their partners. And they mainly want sex (and intimacy, but...the dialogue keeps saying sex) from their partners. In most other shows, our leads would be the "bad guy". The boyfriend who is obsessed with sex and has you do all of the work. But this show is clearly demonstrating that while romance may be in the little things, the little things cannot fill the empty hole. And it's okay to want that hole to be filled.

The characterization of our main leads has flipped as well. The initial setup in episode one depicted Hagiwara as a bit of a bumbling oaf. He sent an email to the wrong address. He forgot to pick up his ID card. Sei, on the other hand, was initially portrayed as the fastidious one handling a business need and admonishing Hagiwara for wearing an id tag that wasn't company issued.

But we have learned that those were false impressions. Hagiwara is good at his job. It's made clear that he's good at planning the company outings. He's good at sales. He's the responsible one gathering and returning the umbrellas. He's the "picky" one at the grill making sure the grilling is done correctly. Sei is the one who stands in the rain and acts a mess. We now know he likely reacted to the id tag because of his complex feelings about who designed it, not because he actually cared about the rules. It's an interesting switch up.

There's also some interesting flips in that Hagiwara is a gregarious guy who talks a lot (he's in sales after all). He not only goes to social events on the regular, he plans them. But he never says what he actually wants. That characterization is more common, but it's still an interesting dichotomy. He is tumblr - only saying his deepest thoughts when writing to a stranger.

Meanwhile, Sei says exactly what he wants. The man is crude and rude, but he's also open with his thoughts. Many taciturn, loner characters are blunt, but few are as open as Sei. He just lays it all out on the table. I wish I could catch the linguistics of Japanese to know if he's actually using rude speech patterns as well, but that's outside of my skillset.

Being a prickly porcupine, Sei is used to people being put off by him. He said earlier that he wasn't nice. And he's not. But we still LIKE him and we still FEEL for him. And that's incredibly difficult to pull off in a show that clocks episodes in at under 25 minutes.

Sei fully expected that Higawara would back off and only give him courtesy greetings once he found out his identity. His friend from college did just that this episode. A few courtesy greetings followed by "Oh you don't have LINE. Guess we won't talk then. Bye." Fujisawa is the only one that seems to have put up with his personality. But Higawara, as bad as he is at expressing his own thoughts, feels comfortable with Sei. He keeps reaching out. He reached out through e-mail. He reached out with an umbrella. He reached out with an invite to treat Sei for helping. He reached out with a dinner invite. And unlike his partner, Sei responds.

For Sei, whose desire to talk keeps getting shut down by his partner, this invitation explicitly to talk is a lifeline. He always responds, taking any hint of Hiragawa reaching out to initiate an entire, probably way-too-honest conversation. After all, the hole is deep.

By the end of the episode, Hagiwara has fully descended into the underground thanks to our pregnant friend spilling the tea. In a bright environment with a lot of light no less (enlightenment I dare say?). He's reaches out to his partner in a final attempt and gets shut down. So he reaches out to Sei. And, Sei does what he always does. He responds. He welcomes someone joining him in the underground. At the end of the day, they both crave the intimacy this connection is providing. But as the storm glass predicts....rain is coming.

How did they fit that much meaty stuff in a 25 minute episode?!

[deansbeer]

♡ a hunter's journey to fatherhood ⎯⎯ dean winchester.

📖 LIBRARY !

SYNOPSIS. dean struggles with anxiety about fatherhood, avoiding you until guidance from mildred helps him embrace love, vulnerability, and hope.

WARNING(S). slight angst | hurt comfort | f!reader | anxiety | self-doubt | dean's fear of failure as a new father | emotional vulnerability | moments of crying | mentions of childhood trauma (a big FUCK U 2 john winchester) | alcohol use (though not excessively) | avoidance | isolation | pregnancy.

kari talks ◞ i saw these gifs of dean n mildred pop up on my feed this morning so i had to write something w a lil fluffy angst <3 don't hate me bc it does have a happy ending !!! + this may sound rushed, has not much dialogue at the end, n repetitive :) my apologies !

dean winchester is an anxiety-riddled mess.

you’ve always known he’s carried the weight of the world on his shoulders, but ever since you told him you were pregnant, he’s been distant. not outright cold, but the kind of distant that eats at you—quiet moments stretched too long, averted gazes, and excuses to leave the room.

it hurts.

you knew dean had his doubts about himself; he’s never been shy about the scars his childhood left behind. but you didn’t expect him to pull away like this.

every time you thought about asking him where he stood—whether he was happy, scared, or maybe regretting it altogether—you stopped yourself. you didn’t want to burden him more than he already seemed to be.

so you busied yourself with little things, distracting yourself by cleaning the house, organizing your shared bedroom, or just sitting on the couch with a book, hoping he’d come around.

but tonight, dean isn’t home.

he’d slipped out a few hours ago, mumbling something about needing air. you didn’t push. you’d seen the tension in his jaw, the way his hands flexed and tightened at his sides like he didn’t know what to do with them.

what you didn’t know was that dean had driven into town, parked the impala outside the local dive bar, and gone inside to drown his thoughts in whiskey.

⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯

the bar was dimly lit and half-empty, perfect for someone who didn’t want to be noticed.

dean sat at the counter, nursing his third drink, his mind spinning.

he couldn’t stop thinking about it. about you. about the baby.

him, a dad.

he snorted bitterly into his glass. what the hell did he know about being a father? he’d barely survived his own childhood. john winchester had been a lot of things—strong, determined, relentless—but a good dad? not even close.

and what if dean turned out just like him?

the thought made his chest tighten, panic clawing at his throat.

he closed his eyes, swallowing hard. the whiskey wasn’t helping; it was only making his emotions come faster, harder.

he slammed a couple of bills on the bar top and left, walking out into the cool night air.

he sat in the impala, gripping the steering wheel as his breath hitched.

and then it hit him—hot tears stinging his eyes, rolling down his cheeks before he could stop them.

he wiped at his face angrily, cursing under his breath.

what the hell is wrong with me?

but then, through the fog of his thoughts, he remembered mildred baker.

she’d helped him and sam on a hunt years ago, and she’d been one of the few people who’d ever managed to get through to him. she was kind, wise, and had this way of making you feel like everything was going to be okay, even when it felt like the world was falling apart.

before he could second-guess himself, he started the car and drove to her place.

⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯

mildred greeted him with the warmth he hadn’t realized he needed.

“dean winchester,” she said with a smile, stepping aside to let him in. “to what do i owe the pleasure?”

he hesitated for a moment, standing in her doorway like a lost kid.

“uh... sorry for showing up so late,” he mumbled, scratching the back of his neck. “i just... i didn’t know where else to go.”

she frowned slightly, concern flickering across her face, but she didn’t ask questions.

“come on in,” she said gently, motioning for him to sit on the couch.

once they were seated, mildred folded her hands in her lap and waited patiently.

“so,” she said after a beat, her voice soft. “what’s got you all tied up in knots?”

and that’s when it all came tumbling out.

words spilled from dean’s mouth faster than he could stop them—about you, about the baby, about how terrified he was of screwing everything up.

“i just... i don’t know how to do this,” he admitted, his voice cracking slightly. “hell, i don’t even know if i can do this. what if i screw the kid up? what if i screw her up? she deserves better than me. they both do.”

mildred listened quietly, her expression soft but unreadable.

when he finally stopped, his chest heaving slightly from the emotional release, she reached over and placed a hand on his arm.

“dean,” she said gently, her voice steady. “you’re not your father.”

his head snapped up at that, his green eyes wide and vulnerable.

“but what if i am?” he whispered.

she smiled softly, shaking her head.

“you’re not,” she said firmly. “you’ve already proven that by coming here tonight. you care, dean. you care so much it’s eating you alive. and that’s what makes you different. john winchester loved you boys, but he didn’t know how to show it. you do. and that’s all that matters.”

dean swallowed hard, his throat tight.

“but what if i mess up?” he asked, his voice small.

“you will,” she said with a chuckle. “because that’s what parents do. we mess up. we’re human. but as long as you love that baby and love itd mama, you’ll figure it out.”

her words settled over him like a warm blanket, easing some of the tension in his chest.

“you’re gonna be a great dad, dean,” she said, her voice soft. “just follow your heart.”

⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯

later that night, after mildred helped him sober up, dean drove back home.

the house was quiet when he walked in, the only sound coming from the soft clinking of dishes in the kitchen.

he followed the sound, stopping in the doorway when he saw you standing at the sink.

you were wearing one of his old flannels, the sleeves rolled up as you washed the few remaining dishes from dinner.

he leaned against the doorframe, watching you for a moment.

god, you were beautiful.

even now, with your hair slightly messy and your focus on the task in front of you, you took his breath away.

he took a deep breath, gathering his courage, and stepped toward you.

you didn’t notice him at first, too lost in your own thoughts.

it wasn’t until he wrapped his arms around you from behind that you startled slightly, your body tensing before relaxing into his embrace.

“baby,” you said softly, your hands stilling in the soapy water.

he buried his face in the crook of your neck, breathing you in.

“where’ve you been?” you asked, your voice gentle but cautious. “are you okay?”

“yeah,” he said, his voice muffled against your skin. “i’m okay.”

you didn’t push for more, not when he mentioned he’d gone to see mildred.

instead, you leaned into him, letting his warmth settle around you like a shield.

he rubbed small circles on your stomach, his lips brushing against your neck.

and for the first time in weeks, you felt a flicker of hope.

but when you opened your mouth to ask him where he stood on the baby, he didn’t let you speak.

instead, he started rambling, the words tumbling out in a rush.

he told you how scared he was, how he’d been afraid he’d ruin everything, that he’d turn out like his dad or disappoint you.

“but i want this, sweetheart,” he said finally, his voice breaking slightly. “i want you. and i want this baby. i just... i needed to figure out how to not screw it up.”

tears stung your eyes as you turned to face him, cupping his face in your hands.

“dean,” you said softly, your voice thick with emotion. “you could never be like him. you love so much, sometimes too much. you’re going to be an amazing dad. i know it.”

he closed his eyes, leaning into your touch as a single tear slid down his cheek.

“thank you, baby,” he whispered.

⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯

after you’d finished the dishes, you drew a bath for the both of you.

you knew he’d been sore and achy from a recent hunt, and you figured the warm water would help.

he sat behind you in the tub, his arms resting on either side of the rim as you leaned back against his chest.

you brought the soapy cloth to your chest, letting the warmth soothe you before handing it to him.

he took it, running it over his own chest before reaching down to gently rub your shoulders.

the quiet intimacy of the moment was enough to ease both your minds, the tension of the past few weeks melting away.

when the water started to cool, dean helped you out of the tub, wrapping a fluffy towel around you before leaning down to kiss your stomach.

you weren’t even showing yet, but the gesture made your heart swell.

he wrapped a towel around himself, and the two of you went through your nightly routines before climbing into bed.

dean was already lying down when you joined him, his hands behind his head as he waited for you.

you turned off the lights and crawled into bed, settling on top of him with your head on his chest.

his hand rested on your lower back, the other cradling the back of your head as he pressed a soft kiss to your hair.

the two of you talked quietly about what to expect, about names and nurseries and everything in between.

and when you finally drifted off to sleep, wrapped in his arms, you knew everything was going to be okay.

because dean winchester was going to be the best damn dad in the world.

[carlos-in-glasses]

Favorite Lone Star Fandom Memories

Thank you @thisbuildinghasfeelings for coming up with this lovely idea! And thank you for the tags @firstprince-history-huh @heartstringsduet @tellmegoodbye @nisbanisba

@carlossreaders @she-walked-away @reyesstrand @rmd-writes

@welcometololaland @nancys-braids @everlastingday @strandnreyes

I have had the best time being part of this fandom so far. Whatever I expected when I first rocked up in September 2022, it wasn't this. What a time we have had. We've been through so much. We've laughed, we've cried, we've swooned, we all became experts on baseball, TV ratings, various laws, and probably know a map of Austin better than we know a map of our own hometowns. I hope with everything I have that this place continues to thrive with love for Tarlos and 911 Lone Star. I hope that I've made some friends for life. I hope that this time during the show's run will be remembered fondly. We got unlucky with this cancellation, but oh my goodness, in other ways we have been so lucky.

First, please enjoy Elaine Paige singing Memory from Cats the Musical. A song for how I'm feeling right now. I promise it's not a Rickroll and I sincerely apologise if you got caught up with me accidentally Rickrolling Lem the other week.

Now! Some memories!:

The time @thisbuildinghasfeelings wanted to know what hospital Carlos would have been taken to after Bridges shot him. I was CRYING LAUGHING because she went to the Texas sub-reddit and was all “Hypothetically, if someone were to get shot in the desert…” and left this message, which quickly got deleted by the mods who probably thought she’d just shot someone:

The time I met @heartstringsduet irl in London last year and wore the below t-shirt, which I got at the 2023 Paris Convention with @cold-blooded-jelly-doughnut by my side 😭. And just being able to talk to them in person about life and the show and hug them!!!! And speaking of the 2023 Paris Convention – I got to to look right into the ultimate cow-eyes and tell this guy that he played my favourite character of all time:

The time I got my ass handed to me by @lemonlyman-dotcom because I used the word vest instead of tank top in a WIP.

The fics I wrote that came out of conversations with others/prompts – they wouldn’t exist without some of you. It makes the writing life feel a lot less solitary and also a lot more about the world's most fun mystery box. Thank you so much

Leaving the most batshit comments on poor @rmd-writes and @welcometololaland fic (Un)Professional Services You two really were troopers in the face of that.

Reading fic so good I've spent the next day at work daydreaming about it and looking forward to the next chapters of chaptered fics – and then getting to tell people how much I enjoyed their work! It’s amazing. YOU ARE ALL SO TALENTED.

Posting Sensitivity, my first fic, and refreshing the page to see that I had 8 kudos. I was blown away. And the comments and responses to other fics that have made all the difference during many tough weeks. Thank you, thank you.

The reactions to when I introduced my poor boyfriend to my Tarlos blanket and then when I put it over my legs lmao:

@goodways post about Carlos’ slutty buttonless shirt look in 1x02 – I can’t find the post, but it was gold! And just so many other Shannon posts omg. The blank sign made for Carlos. Iconic.

When @strandnreyes posted this about TK’s absurd camera roll in 4x04.

Of course when Rafael Silva told me that Tarlos switch and @reasonandfaithinharmony made a gif set out of it!

The Tarlos wedding. I brought a mini bottle of Prosecco for the occasion.

The time I thought @ladytessa74 invented Frog and Toad for chapter 3 of The Lovely April. Also...chapter 3 of The Lovely April genuinely helped me cope with the show's cancellation. So that was a biggie.

The art that has been made for my fics by @heartstringsduet @whatsintheboxmh @thisbuildinghasfeelings and @bonheur-cafe. Absolutely extraordinary. I can’t believe it. Thank you forever. Once again, you’re so talented.

Finding the show. Finding you.

Open tag and tags below!:

@paperstorm @goodways @lightningboltreader @alrightbuckaroo

@cold-blooded-jelly-doughnut @herefortarlos @bonheur-cafe

@lemonlyman-dotcom @ladytessa74 @liminalmemories21

@freneticfloetry @chicgeekgirl89 @sugdenlovesdingle

@reasonandfaithinharmony @carlos-tk @pimento-playing-hopscotch @eclectic-sassycoweyes

@fangirl-paba @actual-sleeping-beauty @kiwichaeng @literateowl

@emsprovisions @ironheartwriter @sapphic--kiwi @butchreyes

@captain-gillian @laelipoo @nancys-braids @goldenskykaysani

@hereghostslive @anactualcaseofthetruth @henrygrass

@theghostofashton @the-126-family @rangersoup

@annoyingcloudearthquake @butch-buckley - if you want to share/haven't already! No pressure ever! ❤️🩷🧡💛💚💙🩵💜

[herefortarlos]

Favorite 911 Lone Star Fandom Memories 🚒

Thank you @thisbuildinghasfeelings for coming up with this lovely idea and thank you @strandnreyes @nancys-braids @welcometololaland @rmd-writes @reyesstrand @she-walked-away @carlossreaders @nisbanisba @tellmegoodbye @heartstringsduet @freneticfloetry @firstprince-history-huh @carlos-in-glasses @bonheur-cafe @heartstringsduet and @goldenskykaysani for all the tags! I read every single one of you favorite moments/memories and they made me emotional and so happy and grateful to know you all and be a part of this fandom! 💖

Anyone who considers themselves a fan of the show, regardless of how engaged with fandom you are, should participate and share if you want!

rules here

Oh, where to begin?!? I am still in denial that it's coming to an end this Monday 🥲I haven't been thinking about it too much which is also why it took me a bit to write this and think of which fandom memories for me I wanted to highlight. I hope we'll all be there for each other if someone needs a little extra comfort in the days, weeks, months that follow! 💜

All the fanfiction, fanart, gifs, edits, etc. and the friends and good acquaintances made through them!

I will always be grateful to Tarlos and Lone Star because they got me to start regularly reading fics again! I used to have a 2 hour commute into NYC and I would read fanfic while sitting on the trains but doing that for 2 years unfortunately burned me out on fanfic and my previous obsession. From 2020 to late 2022, I didn't read much fic. It wasn't until I found Lone Star through FB clips and TK's iconic, "Sure ma'am but just so you know I am a homosexual", that I had found something new to obsess over and love to this degree! Tarlos and LS also brought me back to Tumblr and into fandom in the first place! After I binge watched the show up to season 3, I needed more Tarlos and so I looked through ao3 and started with tarlos fics by @rmd-writes! I saw Rae was on Tumblr and remembered that was where I used to always find fic writers to follow! So I made a new account specifically for the fandom, hello here for Tarlos 😂, and truly engaged in a fandom for the first time! I got to watch all of Season 4 live which was great, and loved seeing people's live reactions to everything on here and loved the codas, art and gif sets people made so quickly after the episode had aired!

And then of course I made fandom and lifelong friends! I started engaging in fandom by leaving unhinged and excitable tags on people's fics and works 😅, as I tend to do, and slowly started becoming mutuals with people! And then @heartstringsduet really opened me up by dming and thanking me for my tags on a fic of hers, and the rest is history 🥹. Michelle really helped me to feel open and comfortable on here and I decided to share my name with people and now I have friends that I know I'll keep in contact with despite the show ending! Some of the most kind, creative, talented, accepting and welcoming people are in this fandom and I am beyond grateful to Lone Star for introducing us! ❤️

The lead up to the Tarlos wedding!

Gahhhh, all the bts we got, and the press tour Ronen and Rafael went on and that Hello! photo shoot, pretty sure my heart stopped when we got those pictures, not to mention the 2 episode Season 4 finale! Now that was a time to be alive! It was treated like such a real wedding and there was so much amazing promotion and was definitely wedding of the year for me!

Discovering I was pansexual and being more open with my sexuality IRL!

I always knew I was queer back in college, although parts of high school definitely make more sense when I stopped to think about them 😂. But because I was in a straight presenting relationship, I never thought to be more open with my queerness? Sure I had those few friends that knew and that I could feel comfortable with, and I had 1 good fellow queer friend at the time to confide in, but I guess I was still learning things about myself and how much of me I wanted people to know? Anyways, Brian Michael Smith and Ronen's coming out story helped me to identify myself and encouraged me to be my authentic self with people! I got my first pride flag because of Lone Star, that I will continue to display outside my house to show that this is a safe place for people that need that, and have met so many diverse and other LGBTQ+ individuals because of it! And also because of that, a good irl friend of mine came out as trans to me first because she felt safe with me! So yeah, a lot of good things to thank a show like 911 Lone Star for 💗.

Finally, becoming a beta reader!

I have been so lucky and have the most fun having been a beta reader for many talented writers in this fandom! Getting to see and help people with their works before they're published, seeing lines and dialogue that I suggested go into the final fic! Without a doubt one of the best things this fandom has given me, along with the many friendships that started because of it! 💖

An OPEN and zero pressure tag for a few people that I don't think have done this yet. @reasonandfaithinharmony @ladytessa74 @carlos-tk @eclectic-sassycoweyes @paperstorm @dear-viv @whatsintheboxmh @alrightbuckaroo @lonestardust @bubblesandroses8 @emsprovisions @cold-blooded-jelly-doughnut @goodways @theghostofashton @henrygrass @lemonlyman-dotcom @guardian-angle22

[sergeantbarnessdoll]

Hi!! Can I please request a Steve Rogers x fem!enhanced!reader where she had been kidnapped by Hydra when she was a teenager after they assassinated her SHEILD agent parents, and she was held in the same place as Bucky ever since then and he took care of her as much as he could like she were his little sister. Now present day, as an adult, she escapes Hydra when SHEILD/Hydra falls? (Bucky def helped). He told her it’s very important that she finds Steve Rogers, that he’ll keep her safe (buck didn’t want to force her to be on the run with him). She has the power to turn invisible, teleport, and send (an invisible) blast through her hands that sends people flying. And that’s how she finds herself wandering outside the Avengers HQ (which they kinda go on the defense because they don’t know who she is). Poor woman is absolutely jumpy and terrified and sends all of them but Steve flying away from her and she turns invisible and just curls in the ground in fear 🥺 And Steve is the only one who can get through to her and calm her down and convinces her to come inside, a gentle arm around her? (He’d be so gentle!!) and she tells him what happened to her, where she came from and how bucky told her to find him

Anyway, she only feels comfortable and safe around him for the longest time, he’s there to help her through her nightmares, help train her, hold her close when she’s feeling scared. They both fall In love!!

Safe With Me » Steve Rogers/Captain America

Pairings: Winter Soldier x Teen!Female Reader, Bucky Barnes x Female Reader, Steve Rogers x Female Reader with the Avengers

Summary: Bucky helps you escape HYDRA and tells you to go find Steve so you’ll be safe.

Warnings: Fluff, Angst (not Bucky and Steve), language, HYDRA, murder, blood, kidnapping, crying, nightmares, kissing, pet names

A/N: Thank you for the beautifully descriptive request @kpopgirlbtssvt 🩵

A/N #2: Italic text is flashbacks and nightmares. Y/M/N stands for your mom’s name and Y/D/N stands for your dad’s name.

Written on my phone. My apologies for any mistakes.

Header made by @buck-star

GIF IS NOT MINE! Gif credit goes to the creator.

“Mom! Dad! I’m home!” You announced when you got home from school, walking in the house.

You didn’t hear either one of them so you assumed they were still at SHIELD. You walked to the living room, only to find the dead and bloody bodies of parents. Your eyes widened and you opened your mouth to scream, but someone put a cloth over your mouth. You kicked and screamed, trying to get free of who was behind you. You soon grew weak and passed out from inhaling the fumes of chloroform.

You woke up a couple hours in an unfamiliar building and room. You squinted your eyes to adjust to the light in the room. You looked around the room to gather your surroundings. You quickly realized that you’re in some kind of lab. You went to stand up, but couldn’t. You looked down at your arms and legs to see them strapped down to a chair.

“Oh good! You’re awake!” A man’s voice said.

You looked up to see a man in a suit, a man in a lab coat, and a couple men in all black clothes.

“I’m Alexander Pierce.” He introduces himself.

“Why did you kill my parents?” You asked, completely bypassing his introduction.

“I wouldn’t think of it as killing. Think of it more as getting them out of the way.” Pierce says.

“Why though?” You asked, your voice cracking.

“That’s easy. Since they’re out of the way, we have easy access to what we want.” He says.

It didn’t take you long to realize that he was talking about you.

“You’re going to be our new experiment and assist the asset during missions.” He explains.

Pierce looks at the man in the lab coat, nodding at him. He nodded back. The man in the lab coat approached you with an IV with some kind of liquid in it. You began to panic and tried to get free of the restraints, but it was no use. You yelped when the needle pricked your skin, tears rolling down your cheeks.

Many months later, you started to develop powers. You weren’t sure what kind of powers they were trying to get you to develop. Whatever it was, hurt every time and you didn’t like it. You just wanted it to stop.

“How’s she doing?” Pierce asks Brock Rumlow.

“She’s getting nowhere.” Brock tells him.

You fearfully stood in front of an HYDRA agent. You were told to get your powers to work, but you’re not sure how to do that. Before you knew it, the agent charged at you. Your eyes widened and you covered your head with your arms. You somehow turned invisible when you did that, impressing everyone in the room. They gave you nods of approval. You uncovered your head and you reappeared.

“What the hell?” You mumbled to yourself.

Pierce approached you and put a hand on your shoulder. You looked up at him.

“Good job, Y/L/N.” He compliments.

“Th-Thank you?” You say more like a question.

“That’s just a start. You’ll get use to it the more you develop your powers.” He says.

A few weeks later, you learned that you were also developing teleportation powers. Those powers weren’t too bad to learn. You were a quick learner with those.

“You know what to do.” Pierce says.

You took a deep breath before doing anything. You held your hands out in front of you and made a circle in front of you. A portal to another room appeared in front of you. You looked back at Pierce. He nodded for you to step in the other room through the portal and you did.

“You’re getting better and better, kid.” He says as you came back in the room you were originally in.

You thought the only powers you had were invisibility and teleportation powers, but that’s not it. You also have some kind of invisible power that comes out of your hands that comes out like a blast and sends people flying. You didn’t know what those powers were called. You just assumed they were similar to telekinesis powers or something like that.

“You’re impressing us more and more everyday, kid. You’re ready to start training with the asset.” Pierce says.

You were led to a room that looks like a gym, but it’s a room that’s used for training. The asset, as he said, was already in there. He’s tall, has long brown hair, blue eyes, and a metal arm.

“This is the Winter Soldier. Asset, this is our newest experiment.” Pierce introduces you two.

You shyly waved at the man. He nodded his head at you. Pierce walked out of the room, leaving the two of you alone in there. The Winter Soldier couldn’t help but notice how young you look which concerned him. A kid like you shouldn’t be in a place like this.

“How old are you, kid?” The Winter Soldier asks.

“15.” You tell him.

His eyebrows rose up when he heard your age. You’re too young to experiencing something like this. You don’t need to be here either.

“What’s your name, doll?” He asks.

“Y/N.” You tell him.

“I’m Bucky.” He kept his voice low so no one outside of the training room heard him. “I’ll protect in here.” He says softly.

You smiled and nodded.

Over time, you and Bucky developed a sibling relationship. You two learned more about each other. Bucky protects you the best he can. When you two go on missions together, he does most of the work while you are somewhere safe so you don’t get hurt.

YEARS LATER

You always go on missions with Bucky- the Winter Soldier, but this time you didn’t. You were sure why you couldn’t go on the mission with him. You asked them why you couldn’t go with him and they told you that you weren’t needed on this mission. Then they locked you in the cell they kept you in.

There wasn’t anything for you to do in a cell that had nothing but a bed in there. You laid on the bed and stared up at the ceiling as time passed. You jumped when you heard the sound of metal breaking. You scrambled to sit up. The door opened, revealing Bucky. You smiled and felt relieved when you seen him.

“We have to get out of here.” Bucky says.

Bucky grabbed your hand and led you out of the cell and out of the HYDRA base. You didn’t question him. You just followed him. When you two were outside of the base, Bucky put a backpack on your back.

“What’s in the backpack?” You asked.

“Clothes and snacks.” He says.

“Where are we going?” You asked.

“You are going to find a guy named Steve Rogers. He’ll help you and keep you safe.” He says.

“Who’s Steve Rogers?” You asked.

“My best friend and Captain America.” He tells you. “Now go.” He says.

“What about you? I can’t just leave you here.” You say, your eyes tearing up.

“I’ll find somewhere to hide. Don’t worry about me, doll.” He says softly.

“But I want to stay with you.” You say, your bottom lip quivering and tears flowing down your cheeks.

“I know you do, but you can’t. You’ll be safer with Steve.” He says.

Bucky pulls you into a tight hug, a couple tears rolling down his cheeks. He kissed your forehead before looking in your eyes.

“I love you, doll.” Bucky whispers. “You will always be like a little sister to me.” He says softly.

“I love you too, Bucky.” You whispered back, your voice cracking. “You will always be my big brother.” You say softly.

You started running. You took a look back to see Bucky running in a different direction. You hated this. You didn’t want to leave the person closest to you. Bucky is like the older brother you never had.

After a few days of looking for Bucky’s friend, you managed to find him. You found him in a building called the Avengers Tower. You wandered around the building, trying to figure out how to get inside.

“There’s a woman outside of the building.” Jarvis informs the Avengers.

“Who is she?” Tony asks.

“I’m not sure, but she looks suspicious.” He says.

Everyone grabbed their weapons, getting prepared for you to come inside the tower. You managed to find the entrance and went inside of the building. You quickly found an elevator and got on it.

“She entered the building and is coming to this floor.” Jarvis informs everyone.

The elevator dinged and the doors opened. You stepped off of it. You were met by the Avengers with their weapons pointed at you. Your eyes widened and you rose your hands in surrender, not trying to cause any trouble.

“Who are you?” Tony asks with his blaster aimed at you.

“I-I-I don’t want any trouble.” You stuttered, not answering his question.

“Why are you here?” Natasha asks.

“I’m looking for someone.” You answered.

“Who?” Thor asks.

You kept fumbling with your words. You knew who you were looking for, but you were so terrified that you forgot how to form any words. That’s when you heard the sound of a gun being cocked and Tony’s blaster. You held your hands out in front of you, forgetting that you had powers for a second. The next thing you knew, the Avengers got blasted by the invisible power that comes from your hands and sent flying all over the room, except Steve. Your eyes widened. You didn’t mean to do that. You didn’t know what to do, except run. Steve ran after you with his shield.

You found a hallway and hid down there. You leaned against the wall, sliding down it. You pulled your knees up to your chest and turned yourself invisible so no one could find you. You started crying out of fear. Steve followed the sound of your crying. It led him to the hallway you’re in, but he didn’t know where you are in the hallway, due to your invisibility powers.

“Show yourself.” Steve says as he cautiously walks down the hallway.

You know you shouldn’t reveal yourself, but you did it anyway. You reappeared. Steve found you sitting on the floor against the wall with your knees pulled up to your chest.

“Why are you here?” Steve asks you.

“I’m- I’m looking for someone.” You tell him.

“Who are you looking for?” He asks.

“Steve Rogers.” You answered.

“That’s me.” He tells you. “Why are you looking for me?” He asks.

“I was told to.” You say.

“By who?” He asks.

“Your friend Bucky Barnes.” You tell him.

Steve’s eyes widened when you said Bucky’s name. He set his shield against the wall before crouching down in front of.

“Did Bucky send you here as himself or as the Winter Soldier?” Steve asks.

“Himself.” You answered. “He told me you two are best friends and you’re Captain America. He said you’ll help me and keep me safe.” You tell him.

“If you don’t mind me asking.” He begins as he sat down next to you. “How do you know Bucky?” He asks.

“Him and I met in HYDRA when I was 15. He’s like an older brother to me. HYDRA killed my parents who worked for SHIELD, kidnapped me, and experimented on me.” You explained.

“Who are your parents?” He asks.

“Y/M/N and Y/D/N.” You tell him.

The memory of seeing your parents dead bodies on the living room flashed in your mind. You couldn’t help but start crying again. Steve wrapped his arm around you, pulling you closer to him.

“I knew your parents. I worked with them a lot. I’m sorry to hear about what happened to them.” Steve says.

You know you don’t Steve, but you quickly started trusting him.

“Bucky was right to tell you to come find me. I’ll help you and keep you safe.” He says.

“Really?” You asked, sniffling and looking up at him with teary eyes.

“Yes.” He confirms.

You smiled at him and hugged him. Steve hugged you back.

Over the next few weeks, you got settled in the Avengers Tower with Steve’s help. Steve stuck to his words. The Avengers aren’t too thrilled about the idea of you living there after you accidentally blasted them with your powers. You were standing next to the door of the lounge room when you heard Steve and the Avengers talking.

“Why is she still here?” Tony asks Steve.

“Bucky told her that I’ll keep her safe and that’s what I intend on doing for her.” Steve says.

“You know, he’s not much of a friend if he tried to kill you. Even ask Wilson and Romanoff. They were there.” He says.

“That was the Winter Soldier not Bucky. He was under HYDRA’s control.” He says, defending his best friend, even though he’s not there.

“Give the man a break.” Sam speaks up. “Bucky wants to make sure his little sister is safe so he sent her to his best friend.” He says.

“How do we know Barnes or HYDRA didn’t send her here to kill us?” Tony asks theoretically.

“Bucky wouldn’t do that.” Steve says.

“Besides, if she wanted to kill any of us, she would’ve done it anyway.” Clint chimes in.

“She may have a track record with HYDRA, but she doesn’t look like the kind of person who would kill anyone.” Wanda says.

Your eyes teared up. You couldn’t help but let that theory get to you. You finally walked in the lounge room, fiddling with the strings on your -Steve’s- sweatshirt.

“None of that is my intention.” You say.

Everyone went silent and turned their attention to you.

“You don’t need to explain yourself, Y/N.” Steve says softly.

“Yes I do.” You say.

You turned to Tony.

“What you think I’m going to do is not true. HYDRA didn’t send me here to kill you guys. I would never do anything like that. Bucky, who’s like a brother to me, sent me to find Steve so he can keep me safe. I wanted to go with Bucky, but he thought it would be better if I’m in Steve’s care.” You explained. “As for me blasting and sent you guys flying across the room with my powers, that was an accident. I didn’t mean to do that. That was out of fear and I apologize for that.” You apologized.

A few tears rolled down your cheeks by the time you were done talking. You left the lounge room and went back to your bedroom. Everyone in the room stayed silent and felt bad for you. Steve went to your room, only to find you crying softly. He sat down on your bed next to you and rubbed your back.

“I’m sorry if you heard any of that.” Steve says softly.

“I heard all of it. I understand why Tony said those things, but it hurt my feelings and to hear.” You say.

“Don’t listen to him.” He says.

You sniffled and sat up. Your face is wet with tears and your eyes are red from crying. Steve grabbed a tissue from the box on your nightstand and gently wiped your tears away. You couldn’t help but smile when he did that. Steve took a moment to admire your beauty.

“You’re very beautiful.” He murmurs softly.

You smiled and looked down, blushing uncontrollably. Steve gently lifted your head so you were looking in his blue eyes. He leaned in and kissed you softly and passionately. His lips felt soft against yours. There was so much love and passion in the kiss that it took your breath away. He pulled away and put his forehead against yours, looking deep in your eyes.

“That was my first kiss.” You admitted.

“I’m honored to be your first kiss.” Steve says with a smile.

Steve pecked your lips softly a few times before you two laid down on the bed. He covered you two up with a blanket and held you close to him. You laid your head on his chest, slowly falling asleep to the sound of his heartbeat.

You weren’t sure how long you have been asleep. You’ve been tossing and turning in your sleep for the past few minutes. Your hands held onto the blanket tightly. You were also mumbling in your sleep.

“What about you? I can’t just leave you here.” You say, your eyes tearing up.

“I’ll find somewhere to hide. Don’t worry about me.” Bucky says softly.

Steve turned on the bedside lamp and turned to face you.

“Sweetheart, wake up.” Steve gently shook you. “You’re having a nightmare.” He says softly.

You gasped loudly and scrambled to sit up, breathing heavily. You looked around the room to gather your surroundings. You then broke down in tears when you didn’t see Bucky. Steve wrapped his arms around you, pulling you onto his lap.

“You’re ok. You’re safe with me.” Steve whispers.

“I miss Bucky.” You say, your voice cracking.

“I do too.” He says softly.

Your crying died down after a few minutes and you fell back to sleep.

“Hey! You said you’d go it easy on me.” Steve playfully jokes.

“I told you I wouldn’t use my powers and do it your way. So technically I am going easy on you.” You giggled.

A couple weeks later, you and Tony managed to work out his differences with you. Steve has been helping you train. Actually, you two are playing around at the moment.

“You know, you can go a little harder on me. I can handle it. I am Captain America after all.” He says.

“Don’t say I didn’t warn you, Stevie.” You say jokingly.

You did a move Steve taught you. Actually, Bucky taught you years ago. Steve is just helping you improve it. You kicked his feet out from underneath him and he fell onto the mat on the floor. You shocked yourself when you did that.

“Woah. That was cool.” You say, still shocked.

“So it’s cool that you knocked me to the ground?” He jokes.

“N-No! I was just- I never done that before. Actually, I’ve done it a couple times.” You babbled.

Steve reaches up and pulls you down to the floor with him. Actually, you landed on top of him.

“I’m not mad. I’m impressed, sweetheart.” He says.

You two stared in each other’s eyes. You and Steve got caught up in the moment and one thing led to another and Steve kissed you.

“I don’t think Bucky would approve of this if he found out.” You giggled softly.

“It’ll be our little secret.” Steve whispers and playfully winks.

Steve stood up and helped you up.

“Can I tell you something?” You asked nervously.

“You can tell me anything, Y/N.” He says.

“I’m in love with you.” You tell him. “I’m not just saying that cause we kissed a couple times. I feel a connection between us and-” Steve kissed you to get you to stop blabbing.

“I’m in love with you too, sweetheart.” He whispers and smiles at you.

“Really?” You asked.

“Yes.” He answers, kissing you again. “I love you, darling.” He whispers.

“I love you too, Stevie.” You whispered back with a smile.

💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙

-Bucky’s Doll

[crowsofdarkness]

Dorogaya: Chapter Seven

-gif not mine. credit to owner-

Pairings: Bucky Barnes x Female Agent! Reader.

Content Warnings: language, 18 + implied smut, angst, fluff, kidnapping, violence.

Summary: It has been a few years since Bucky and Reader went into hiding. Just when they thought they were slowly building a life together, the past comes back with a vengeance.

Authors Note: This is the sequel to Soldat! You should read that series first. This takes place during Civil War. Tags are open if anyone is interested!

Tags: @globetrotter28 @sakuracyberhex @chinggay85-blog @bookofriverr @misatxox @that-blonde-girl @cats-chaotic-mind @wintrsoldrluvr @sebastians-love @pumpkin-babydoll @ordelixx @starfly-nicole @j23r23 @baw1066

Soldat Masterlist | Dorogaya Masterlist

The soft vibrating of the quintjet rumbled against my feet as I sat down next to Bucky while Steve drove. We had been up in the air for a while now but we were all tired from our fight. We wanted to rest before the next fight. 

I dared to look over to Bucky, who had his eyes trained hard against the back of Steve’s head. So many emotions were running through him. 

Anger. 

Rage. 

Confusion.  

Sighing, I placed a hand on his knee and gave it a squeeze. He turned his gaze towards me and forced a smile. 

“I’m okay,” he tried to reassure me but I knew. 

“Do you want to talk?” I asked. 

He shook his head before turning his attention to Steve once again. “What’s going to happen to your friends?” 

A loud sigh escaped through his lips and Steve shook his head. “Whatever it is, I’ll deal with it.”

“I don’t know if I’m worth all this, guys.” Bucky admitted with a sad sigh. 

“Buck,” I sighed. “Don’t say that.” 

“What you did all those years, it wasn’t you. You didn’t have a choice,” Steve said over his shoulder. 

“I know. But I did it,” Bucky said without missing a beat. 

The tears started to form in my eyes and I shook my head while standing up. I couldn’t sit and let Bucky feel bad about himself for what he did all those years as The Winter Soldier. He was forced to kill all those people. 

I sat towards the back of the jet on one of the weapons crates and tried to calm myself with deep breaths. 

“Doll?” 

Tearful eyes met with Bucky’s sad ones and all I could feel from his was one thing; he was worried about us. 

“I’m fine, Bucky.” I reassured him. 

“You’re crying,” he noticed. 

“It’s been a very long day,” I admitted with a sigh. 

Bucky came in front of me and spread my knees open with his metal hand, stepping between them. The same hand pulled my braid free and ran fingers through my hair, combing out the knots. 

I closed my eyes, enjoying the small moment of domestic bliss as he massaged my scalp. I hummed in pleasure, wishing we were in a different situation; back in our home in Romania, just the two of us laying in bed. 

We never had the chance to be intimate with each other, Bucky only feeling comfortable with cuddling and kisses. I was fine with it at first but there was a part of me that wondered if we would ever take that next step. 

We’ve never even kissed with tongue, only a few pecks. 

His plump lips brushed against my forehead. “Tell me what you’re thinking.” 

I shrugged my shoulders. “I was missing our home. I wish we could be there right now.” 

Bucky smiled. “It wasn’t much but we made it ours, huh?”

The question I wanted to ask kept trying to crawl its way through my throat but I didn't want to push Bucky more than he was today. 

“Hey,” he softly spoke, “What’s going on?” 

Hesitating for a moment, I sighed. “I have to be honest with you. About Steve and me. We didn’t just work together, we sort of had something together.” 

Bucky’s body went rigid before he released the anger with a sigh. “I know.” 

My grasp fell slightly on his hips. “You do?” 

“You’re pretty easy to read, doll,” he gave me a smug smirk. “Is there still something going on between you two?”

Immediately I shook my head. “No. Not since the night I took you to my family cabin.”

“If things were different, if I never found you, would you be with him right now?” Bucky questioned after a beat of silence. 

I hesitated, not sure what the answer was that he was looking for. 

“I don’t know, Buck. There was something there, I can’t deny that.” I admitted. 

He went to walk away but I grabbed his flesh arm to stop him. “I know you’re jealous of mine and Steve’s past but please just listen to me for one second.” 

When I knew he wasn’t going to leave, I continued. “Can you tell me what’s going on between us?” 

“I thought we were together,” Bucky said. 

“We are,” I nodded. “You know I’m fine with not putting a label on us until you feel comfortable with yourself and us.” 

Bucky’s eyes narrowed. “I am comfortable with us, doll.” 

I couldn’t help but scoff. “Are you? Because I’m afraid to take the next step with you because I don’t want to push you.”

“It’s difficult, Y/N. Trying to remember how to kiss a girl or even touch one. I haven't had sex with anyone since the night you left Hydra. It’s not easy having you around Steve, knowing that he knows more about those things. He can give you what you want and need now while I don’t know when I can give you that.” 

My hands cupped his cheeks and I forced him to look at me. “Listen to me, Bucky. I don’t want anyone else besides you. Steve and I did have something between us but I promise you that I’m only yours.” 

He nodded in my hands. “I’m trying, Y/N. I really am, I just need a little more time.” 

“I understand, I do. But you have to understand that when I’m giving you a foot, I can only ask for an inch in return.” I said. 

“I just wish I knew how,” Bucky admitted, eyes looking down for a quick second.

“What if we shared silent ques to know how we’re feeling?” I suggested. 

When Bucky agreed, I decided to show him what I was talking about. 

“A kiss on the cheek; friends,” I gave him a kiss on the cheek. 

I couldn’t help but laugh at his pouted lip. 

“A kiss on the forehead; I hope we're together forever.” 

A soft kiss on his forehead. 

“A kiss on the ear; you’re my everything.” 

A gentle kiss on his ear. 

Bucky sucked in a breath when my lips nibbled on his ear for a quick second. 

“A kiss on the hand; I adore you.” 

I made sure to grab his metal one, the one that he was still nervous to use around me, and gave a chaste kiss across his knuckles. 

“A kiss on the shoulder; we belong together.” 

I brought him close to me and left a quick kiss on his shoulder but scrunched my face when I was met with the taste of leather and velcro. 

“Sorry,” Bucky giggled. 

“A kiss on the neck; I want you,” I spoke lustfully. 

I placed a few kisses on Bucky’s neck, taking my time slowly sucking after each kiss. His hands wrapped around my hips, squeezing them with every kiss. 

“A kiss on the stomach; I’m ready.” 

With a gentle push, I was kneeling in front of Bucky and slowly lifted the bottom of his shirt and felt my insides melt when I saw his happy trail going from his belly button to the top of his belt buckle. A few soft kisses down the trail was all I did, not knowing if he was comfortable. 

He answered my silent question when his hands gripped through my hair, gently forcing a few more kisses across his belt line. While standing up, face to face with him, I placed a finger underneath his chin, my breath fanning over his lips. 

“A kiss on the lips; I love you.” 

Time seemed to stop as I placed a soft kiss on his lips. I had every intention of pulling away but Bucky had other plans. 

His lips collided with my own, hungrier than I had ever felt before. His arms wrapped underneath my ass, lifting me back onto the gun crates. Bucky pushed my knees open with his own and once again was standing in between them. 

I felt his tongue push its way through my mouth and for the first time in years, our tongues danced together in the lustful bliss we had created. My hands gripped his vest, trying everything I could do to pull him closer to me. 

Bucky’s flesh fingers traced down my neck over my collar bone and stopped at the zipper of my suit. He slowly started pulling the zipper down and I moaned into his mouth. 

“Bucky.” 

He mimicked my own moan, only louder, when my hands pulled at his belt, suddenly wanting his pants off. 

“Are you sure?” I asked after taking a quick break from kissing. 

Bucky answered my question with a kiss to the neck, teeth scraping alongside my veins and sucking love bites all over. The lust I felt over taking me from Bucky was strong and I felt myself getting dizzy at the thought of our naked bodies together. 

“Let's take it slow,” Bucky breathed into my neck. 

He worked the zipper down to my navel and his flesh fingers traced circles on my bare stomach. I laced fingers with his metal fingers, giving him a silent approval that he was able to use that hand for whatever he wanted. 

I knew he was still insecure about even touching me with his metal arm but wanted him to know that I wanted to feel the coolness of his fingers touching me, all over. 

In a quick instant, his vest was on the ground and as our lips still collided with each other, my hands started slowly pulling his shirt up but a loud cough from behind us, stopped our actions in an instant. 

Looking over his shoulder, I noticed Steve had his arms crossed over his chest while looking at us.

“We’re almost there.” Steve’s voice was curt. 

Wiping off the excess saliva from my lips, I fixed my hair while Bucky zipped my suit back up, his body covering Steve from seeing anything that was underneath. 

“Sorry,” I apologized. 

Steve only nodded before retreating back to the pilot seat, leaving Bucky and I alone. 

Our eyes locked and I could feel the lust ooze out of them. 

“Was that okay?” I questioned while biting my lip. 

“Doll, that was more than okay.” He groaned, thinking back to our heated kiss just a few moments ago. 

“We’ll have to pick up where we left off once this is all over,” I said.

Bucky’s flesh hand reached for mine and I accepted it, jumping off of the crate. Bucky placed a soft kiss on my lips before nodding towards Steve. 

“I’m going to use the bathroom before we land.” 

Nodding, I gave him a quick smile while he walked the other direction than me. Sitting beside Steve, we both sat there in silence, afraid to say the first word. 

“I didn’t mean to interrupt,” Steve apologized. 

“It’s fine,” I said while playing with my fingers. 

“He loves you, ya know,” Steve’s voice pulled me from my thoughts. 

“Hm?” I questioned, raising my head to face him. 

Steve put the jet on autopilot before looking over to me. 

“If you’re afraid that Buck won’t ever say it to you, don’t be. I’ve seen him with a lot of girls back in the day but none of them have changed him the way you do. You both have had a shit hand dealt to you over the years so if anyone deserves a happy ending, it’s him.” 

I smiled at Steve’s kind words. “Even if it’s with me?” 

“Even if it's with you,” he winked. 

Bucky returned, placing a kiss to my ear, and sat next to me. Linking our hands together, mine with his flesh, I couldn’t help but stare up at his soft blue eyes before I rested my head on his shoulder, trying to enjoy these last few moments of peace. 

[echoingbirdsofprey]

Back Forty View (On Our Piece Of Ground)

7 - You're What My World Spins Around

Pairings: Tyler Owens x OFC Georgia Tennley-Owens, Jake 'Hangman' Seresin x OFC Samantha Kazansky

Rating: EXPLICIT (MDNI!)

Warnings: Birth of a child, Mentions of death, swearing as every other chapter I don't even put it anymore hahah

A/N: I feel like this chapter is kinda crap? Idk, but anyway we are finally here, it's time for baby Jaycen to be born! Total disclaimer, I tried to do my research but I don't know shit about pregnancy or babies or any of that so I did my best with details. No, I did not go into full details of the labor and all that just kind of glanced over it. I just felt this this was a huge plot point that's been looming for so long that I need to just get it down. As always comments, reblogs, likes, and feedback is always appreciate 100%. Thank y'all for continuing reading! Pics from pinterests! Gifs by @kaizsche I hope you enjoy this one.

Tags: @mrsevans90 @djs8891 @gpsmississippihippie @dizzybee03 @coloraturadiva @kmc1989

Tyler and Jake were born in the very early morning and gave their mother hell. Well, Jake did more so than Tyler, but altogether her labor had been nearly forty hours. Tyler came into the word silent as the night and Jake came screeching like a fighter jet, his attempt to break the sound barrier at the first try. The joke became, as the boys got older that Tyler snuck into the world and Jake came in like he'd been left behind by Tyler, and that he was pissed about it. Their father, Randall Owens, was the proudest man on earth, and the most supportive too. He took as much time off as he could when Jeanie had the boys. He spent as much time as her, if not more sometimes, with the boys, getting to know their individual personalities and their quirks. In most ways the boys were the same, but in some they were totally opposite.

For a long time after Randall died, Jeanie was devastated. She didn’t know how to go on without him, but she figured it out. She raised up two wild little boys who were always getting in trouble, and always just like their father in the one way that carried them through life. Both of Jeanie Owens' boys had compassion for others. 

Both of her boys were lovers and fighters. She’d taught them to always give people a chance, but to be adamant when they wanted something and to not settle. She taught them to go after their dreams. That’s why Tyler worked his ass off becoming the best bull rider he could. That’s why Jake got top of his class at the Naval Academy and got into the Top Gun program. That’s why both boys were both book smart and street smart. That’s why both of Jeanie’s boys, when they wanted something, they went after it and didn’t give up until they got it. 

Nothing was handed to Tyler and Jake. Jeanie didn’t bend when it came to rules. She made them do chores from a young age to learn responsibility. She made them care for all the horses. They were driving before they were supposed to be. And when Jeanie met Kenneth Seresin, those boys gave him hell. The boys were respectful of course, but that didn’t mean they didn’t challenge Kenny. What they remembered of Randall was how he had been with Jeanie. Always gentle with her, always supportive, and even though at their young ages they didn’t quite understand all of it, they remembered it later in life. There had been so much love in the little ranch in Dardanelle, Arkansas and until Kenny showed them the same level of reverence for their mother, those boys gave him a run for his money.

Kenny did everything with Tyler and Jake that he could. It was as if he was trying to make up for lost time and the loss of their father. He tried to be the best replacement to Randall that he could. He took them to roping events and the high school rodeos to compete. He took them up in military helicopters and on base before he was honorably discharged due to an injury, He helped them fix old beat up trucks that the boys had bought with their own savings. He taught them that no matter when you meet a person, you can love them as if you’ve always loved them their entire life. Tyler and Jake knew he wasn't their father by blood, but because of how he was with them, they treated him all the same in the end. And Kenny was damn proud to call those boys his sons.

🌪️ 🛩️🛻⚓

Tyler and Dustin took turns caring for Ducati, but not without Georgia right there, on the outside of the pen. By Tyler’s rules, until Jaycen was born, she wasn’t allowed in the pen with the horse, just in case he spooked or charged at her. However, the mustang was proving more trustworthy each day. Each time Dustin went in, whether it was to scrub his waters and refill them, pick out his poop, give him hay, or throw him grain, Ducati followed him just like the puppies. When Tyler went in to do the same chores, Ducati only wanted Tyler to love on him. Tyler would rub the mustang’s forehead, and then his neck, and he’d even offer his belly and his back for scratches. After a week, Tyler was able to touch the horse all over. After two, he was able to pick up each of his feet, without a halter, and after three...well Georgia wanted Tyler to try and throw a saddle pad over his back.

“Gee, I don’t know. Seems kinda fast.” Tyler said, as Ducati pushed his neck toward Tyler, begging to be scratched. Tyler obliged readily and then he glanced at Georgia, who had thrown the saddle pad over the top bar of the panels.

“He trusts you. I trust you. Just give it a try.” Georgia said softly, reaching out to rub Ducati’s nose. Tyler slowly took the saddle pad from the top bar and held it out for the gelding to sniff. He was uninterested and just pushed his neck toward Tyler again. Tyler raised a brow and then touched the gelding with it. Again, uninterested. Tyler tilted his head and then gingerly placed the pad on Ducati’s back. The gelding glanced at him and licked his lips.

“She said he’d had a saddle on.” Georgia said, sneaking a piece of carrot from her pocket to the gelding’s awaiting mouth. He churches happily on it and then turned his nose toward Tyler. 

“Got nothin’ bud, sorry. Just a silly saddle pad.” Tyler chuckled as Ducati poked his nose toward Georgia’s belly. She smiled and Tyler spoke again. “He’s smart that’s for sure. I figured since she said he had been buckin’, he wouldn’t be too keen on the saddle pad at all.”

“I think he doesn’t care much about the equipment. She didn’t give us the full story. I’d put money on him spookin’ at somethin’ while she was ridin’ and he bucked, bolted, and got her off. She was too scared to get back on so he’s probably squirrelly under saddle, not on the ground. I think he was how he was at her place because she never got rid of any of that anxiety. She just left it in there. Here, he didn’t feel like he needed any anxiety because we were gentle and calm from the start. And you’re not afraid of anythin’ so.” Georgia explained, as Tyler’s gaze settled on Ducati. The gelding swished his tail and cocked a hip. 

“Can you get Jake?” He asked and Georgia nodded, going back into the barn. Jake had been helping to muck out the stalls and Georgia had put Sam in charge of brushing horses. Georgia was determined at some point to get Sam on one of their horses and see if she remembered how to ride. 

“Hey Jake, Tyler needs you.” Georgia said, just as Jake was pushing the wheelbarrow out of the stall he had been cleaning. He closed the door behind him and pushed the wheelbarrow out the front so that he could dump it after. Tyler, being ever ingenuitive, had come up with a dump trailer and manure spreader to use for the back fields, effectively fertilizing them so that when the summer came around, the horses would have beautiful grass to go out on.  

“Can you grab my saddle?” Tyler asked as Jake stepped out of the barn. He immediately doubled back and Georgia inhaled a sharp breath.

“Okay, now who’s pushing it?” She asked, as she hung her arms over the rail. Ducati once again, placed his nose gently at her belly. Jaycen kicked hard then and Georgia closed her eyes and groaned softly. 

“Did he just talk back for me ?” Tyler smirked, as he placed his hand on her belly.

“I think so. That hurt a bit.” She said and Tyler chuckled as Jake reappeared, Tyler’s huge roping saddle easily slung over one arm. 

“Seems like Jaycen wants his horse ready for when he comes out.” Tyler joked and Jake threw the saddle over the panel so Tyler could pull it down. Georgia kept her eyes on Ducati the whole time and the mustang barely moved. In fact, he looked bored. 

“Okay buddy, let’s try somethin’ huh?” Tyler said, stepping over to Ducati with the saddle. He gave an out loud count of one, two, three and then swung the saddle up and onto the horse’s back. Ducati flinched a little at the weight, but his expression stayed the same and he licked his lips again. Tyler reached under to grab the cinch and secure it, then the back cinch. He pulled the breastplate around and buckled that before stepping back. Ducati simply followed Tyler, seeming to not even notice the saddle that had been put on him.

“Do I dare?” Tyler asked, glancing at Georgia, then Jake.

“If you’re gettin’ on, I’m takin’ a video for Tiktok, you dumb sonofabitch.” Jake laughed and held up his phone. “Dumb ways to die!” He sung, which made Tyler laugh, but not Georgia. She glared at him.

“ Don’t be stupid, Tyler. ” She said. Tyler patted Ducati and then turned to Georgia with a small smile.

“Oh let me have a little fun, darlin’.” He mused as he reached over the gate to grab the rope halter they had been using for the gelding. It was old and tattered, but still solid. Ducati walked over, placing his nose through the halter and letting Tyler secure it. He rubbed the horse’s neck and then brought him to the middle of the pen. “Any advice before I ruin this horse, Peach?”

“If you get on and he bucks you off...well...you’re fixin’ it later, Arkansas .” Her tone was well on the way to annoyed. Tyler placed his foot in the stirrup, bouncing a few times and paying attention to the horse’s ears. They flicked back and forth and he blinked a few times, but stood remarkably still. Tyler jumped up and laid across the saddle, then hopped back down. He repeated this step a few times before finally swinging his leg over the other side. He felt Ducati go round and suck up his belly underneath the saddle. Tyler grabbed the horn and the back of his saddle, ready for whatever was about to happen. Everyone held their breath, except Tyler. He took a deep breath and as if he was back in the chute, he blew the breath out at the same time as Ducati exploded into the air.

He vaguely heard Georgia yell at him, he heard Jake whoop and shout and he saw Sam and Dustin run out of the barn from the corner of his eye. Tyler pulled himself tight to the saddle and as Ducati quite literally bronced underneath him, Tyler fought the urge to move his legs in a spurring motion like he used to do when he rode bulls. Even though it had been years, it was hard to quell something that had been so ingrained in his brain as a habit.

They made it about two times around the round pen before Ducati lost his balance and hit Tyler’s leg on the panel, scaring himself and making Tyler yelp. Georgia turned away, the nauseous dread creeping up from the pit of her stomach. She couldn’t watch. Jake was still filming and both Sam and Dustin’s mouths were ajar in awe as Tyler too lost his balance, lost his grip on the cheyenne roll on the back of the saddle, and scared Ducati even more as he tumbled from the mustang’s back onto the dirt. He landed with a loud thud, on his ass and Ducati immediately froze. 

“TYLER!” Georgia nearly screamed, knowing he’d fallen. The wind had been knocked out of him, but when she heard him laughing, she sighed heavily, relieved. “You fuckin’ idiot! I say it out of love and because you scared me, but you’re a dumb ass!”

“Ah, I never thought I’d be so turned on havin’ my pregnant wife reprimand me.” He chuckled and coughed, then shot her a flirty glance as he stood stiffly and rubbed his ass. If looks could kill, Tyler would be a dead man walking up to kiss his wife. She brushed the dust off of him and glanced around him. Ducati had walked up behind him, apologetically. Tyler rubbed the gelding’s nose. “Bud, not your fault. I pushed ya. I also fell off. Bad ridin’ on my part.”

“Well, now you have to do it again.” Georgia said, tugging at his shirt. He leaned down and kissed her again and then smirked. Jake was doubled over, laughing his ass off, and Sam smacked him gently. Jake stood and took a deep breath before leaning back on the panels.

“Yes ma’am. Anythin’ I could do different?” Tyler asked, as he was ready to mount up again. He was a little shaky and his hips were stiff, but he knew if he didn’t get back on it would be bad for both of them. Tyler had dissociated during the bucking fit, trying to block out any sort of fear or anxiety he had, although it didn’t feel the same as it did with the bulls. He felt like he could trust Ducati. He knew he couldn’t trust the bulls. And, he lost his balance and fell because he started thinking. He figured if he stayed on this time, Ducati might quit bucking on his own, knowing that his rider could stick it out and not be afraid.

“Just don’t fall off again. You’re gonna be sore as hell tomorrow.” Georgia said softly, placing her head on her hands on the panel rail. She blew out a long breath as Tyler climbed aboard again.

“That the first time you been bucked off since your accident?” Jake asked and Tyler nodded.

“Wasn’t that bad, He’s not trying to get me off, he’s just scared shitless. If I can stick it, he’ll quit.” Tyler said, looking to Georgia for guidance. He picked up the rope and not feeling Ducati ball up this time, he asked him to turn left. Ducati obliged, moving off softly. Tyler asked for a little more speed, clicking his tongue to get the horse to trot. He wiggled his legs a little as well, unsure of how much education the horse had. Ducati scooted forward and when Tyler didn’t tense up, the horse took a breath and let it out. 

Tyler asked for a little more again, urging the horse to canter. As soon as he stepped into it, Ducati became overwhelmed with worry and went to bucking again. He folded in two and Tyler quickly grabbed for the saddle. The bucking fit was shorter this time and Tyler stayed on successfully, letting Ducati come down to a trot again. He asked for canter, got a few crow hops, then Ducati slowed down. The little horse had a comfortable trot and an even canter that Tyler asked for once more. There was no broncing this time and as Ducati cantered around a little, Tyler realized what he had just done. He let Ducati come to a full halt, right by Georgia.

“How’d I do?” He asked, rubbing the horse all over, just making sure he was okay with everything that was going on. Georgia nodded.

“Not bad, Arkansas. You might get good at this if you keep at it.’ Georgia teased and Tyler leaned over the panels to kiss her. He dismounted and immediately removed the tack and handed it all to Jake to take back in the barn. Georgia turned and began to walk back into the barn, satisfied with her husband’s stupidity that actually worked out in the end. She threw a lascivious grin his way and waved as she spoke. “You might even get a surprise later on.”

Tyler’s eyes widened and he smiled. He glanced at Dustin, who pursed his lips and motioned for him to go follow Georgia. Jake and Sam had headed back into the barn to finish up what they had been doing. Tyler knew he'd be sore for a few days but it was worth it if he helped Ducati feel a little better, and made less work for Georgia once she could get back on and put some more time into him.

🌪️ 🛩️🛻⚓

Jake had taken to doing extra sessions with the puppies and he even helped Tyler with their dogs. Ryker had imparted upon Jake that it was imperative to be consistent with the dogs, so while down in Oklahoma, Jake spent at least two hours each day with each dog. One in the morning and one at night if he could, going through every aspect of training that he had learned so far. Sam spent about an hour with each dog as well, usually taking them as a group for a walk. They wanted the dogs well rounded in a pack and as individuals so doing this would only help and it made the bond between the three dogs stronger too. Jake had even taught Sam everything in the short amount of time that they’d been there. 

Ballast exceeded every expectation that Ryker had for the pup. Jake never had any, so Ballast surprised him at every turn. At just over eight months old, the dog was essentially a lanky, mini version of what he would be as an adult. The bite work was where Ballast really shined. Jake already had a competition ready focus heel available at any moment. Jake could out Ballast from any bite with just his voice command. And Ballast would take down anyone for Jake. A true protection dog in the making. Jake noticed something else though and that was that Ballast was also fiercely loyal to Samantha. That was ultimately what Jake wanted, so that when he wasn’t around, Samantha wouldn't have to worry about a thing. He knew Rocco would give his life for Sam, but Ballast would back him up and avenge that death if he had to, tenfold.

Muster on the other hand, was not what they expected. She excelled in all the obedience and protection work. Her bite work was great and she was a powerful little fur missile in her own right, but Muster wanted much more than anything to cuddle and hang out with Sam. Muster was absolutely Sam’s dog and while she liked Jake, she found solace in Samantha’s company. Muster also knew that Georgia was pregnant and if the cattle dogs and Ballast got too rambunctious around her, Muster would break it up. The female dog knew the importance of rest and recuperation for everyone. She wasn’t exactly a party pooper, but she did like her peace and quiet. She was a calming presence for the other dogs and that was an excellent thing to have with such a high drive, high energy pack.

Jake had even taken to teaching Rocco some of the obedience training. Rocco actually took to it pretty well too, considering his breed. Dachshunds tended to be stubborn and difficult to work with if you didn’t know how to motivate them. Jake figured out that Rocco’s motivation was simply pleasing Samantha so any time he worked with Rocco, he made sure that Sam was there and she was ready to praise him. Jake had never thought he’d grow to love the little dog as much as he did, but there was a special spot in his heart for Rocco. One that he thought would be empty from Dixie forever, but he was certain that the little red dog might be able to fill that hole with his big, courageous personality. 

🌪️ 🛩️🛻⚓

Georgia firmly believed that just like the calves and foals that her father used to raise, it wasn't up to mom when the baby came. It was all up to when that baby wanted out. And at exactly nine months to the day, Jaycen Alexander Owens decided he was ready to see the world for the first time.

Georgia had been laying down for the majority of the day, not feeling particularly well. She’d been somewhat nauseous all day. She picked at the lunch that Tyler had made and when she decided she couldn’t lay down any longer, she elected to take a walk outside, ending up in the barn, which she had come to expect. She’d felt some pressure in her pelvis just after lunch. She mentioned it to Tyler and he’d been concerned, checking in on her every hour or so after that. She’d also felt like when she went back out around dinner time, that she was waddling like a penguin. Her steps felt particularly heavy the longer she stayed out there and she was nearly done feeding the horses. She just had to drop grain but she had an overwhelming feeling that something wasn’t right.

Tyler had been working on his truck, had gone in for a shower because he had oil and soot everywhere, and had come back out to help Georgia finish feeding the horses dinner. He’d assumed that was where she was when he didn’t find her in their bedroom or on the couch. Jake hadn’t noticed her step out either. When he walked into the barn, Georgia was standing frozen, looking down at the barn floor. Her water had broken and it was time.

“Gee? You okay?” Tyler placed a hand on her back, feeling her shaking.

“Tyler...we have to go to the hospital. Like now.” She said, glancing at him and he could see fear in her eyes, wide as she tried to breathe evenly.

“Wait why...oh..oh shit...baby's comin?” Tyler's eyes widened too and he took her hand and began to lead her to the front of the barn.

“Very much yes!” She exclaimed as they crossed the threshold of the barn.

“Got it hold on! I'll be back in a sec!” He said, letting her lean on the door frame. He called the dogs and swung the front door open, yelling to his brother.

“Jake! Start my truck! Gotta get to the hospital. Dogs! Inside!” Tyler yelled as he burst through the door, all six dogs bounding through the open space, nearly knocking him over in the process.

“Baby time?” Jake asked excitedly, leaping from the couch and grabbing his boots. Sam, who had been sitting next to him, got the dogs settled, and then grabbed her shoes as well.

“Baby time!” Tyler exclaimed, turning on his heels to go help Georgia the rest of the way to the truck. 

“Woohoo! I'm aboutta be an uncle! And you’re gonna be an aunt!” Jake hugged Sam, then kissed her hard, making her giggle as they headed out the door. Once they were all settled in the truck, they were off.

Tyler made the drive short, nearly getting pulled over, but the cop recognized them and knowing that Georgia was pregnant, realized why Tyler Owens, the Tornado Wrangler,  was speeding down Interstate 177. They took Georgia to a room immediately and got her prepped. Tyler helped her change into a hospital gown, his hands gentle as they then guided her into the open space of the room. Dr. Ginnie Halstead was going to be helping deliver, and she was the one they'd been seeing throughout all of their appointments, so they were comfortable with her. Then the waiting began.

Jake had made sure that the bag in the back of Tyler’s truck with everything that Georgia needed, including some extra clothes for them both, some of the onesies they’d gotten for Christmas, extra toiletries, and some snacks among other things, had made its way into the room. He and Sam were going to stay until Georgia was actively giving birth, then they would step out and let her and Tyler be with each other. 

“Tyler, this is too early.” Georgia said, as she paced back and forth. Her contractions were getting closer together, slowly but surely. 

“Doc said it’s fine. Everything’s been good so far. Sometimes they come a little early. We wanted this.” He said, finally sitting down after having followed her back and forth for the past thirty minutes. 

“I know but it feels too early .” She said softly, glancing over at Jake and Sam. They were curled on the small couch that was situated in the corner of the room. The room itself was nice, a little larger than a normal single bed, plenty of space to move around, a spot for the baby and a full bathroom with a shower. The lighting was softer than a normal hospital suite and it put Georgia at ease, slightly. 

“It feels too early because we were both freaking out about this like a month ago and now we're here. It’s actually happening.” Tyler said, reaching for her, stopping her. 

“Why are you so calm right now?” Georgia asked, pausing her pacing.

“Well one of us has to be and it sure as shit ain’t you. Respectfully darlin’, you’re supposed to be a little scared.” Tyler’s eyes were soft as he watched her from his seat on the bed. His hand lingered at her side and as soon as the next contraction came, she was off again, walking back and forth. She breathed in and out, slowly and carefully. They subsided and her eyes met his.

“You’re not scared?” She asked. Tyler stood, walking toward her slowly. He pulled her into his arms, his hands careful around her waist. 

“I’m terrified but I’m holding it together for you.” He admitted readily. This stirred Jake’s attention, just as Georgia began walking again. Even though Jake knew how to be with Sam, he was still taking notes from his brother. 

Several hours later, and lots of pacing, Georgia’s legs were starting to shake. She had been walking and pausing endlessly. She feared for when she needed to be still and that time was coming rapidly. Dr. Halstead had come in a few times to check on her and see how her pain was. They’d decided she was going to have an epidural as close as possible to when she needed to push, as sometimes the epidural could slow down the process.

Tyler had pulled her onto the bed, putting a halt to her pacing that was becoming slightly frantic. He situated her between his legs and began to massage her shoulders.

“Just breathe, mama. You got this.” He whispered, his lips brushing the shell of her ear. She leaned back against him and grinned. He'd removed his boots so that he could be on the bed with her, so for the past hour or so he'd been sliding around in his socks.

“At least your feet don't stink.” She murmured, taking a deep breath as another contraction steamrolled over her. He felt her shudder as she grabbed for his legs and leaned forward. His lips turned up as they met the back of her neck. 

“No, darlin’ they don't.” He chuckled softly as the doctor came in to let them know that the anesthesiologist would be along shortly to administer her epidural, so Tyler would have to scoot out from behind her, but he took up until the last second that he could to stay there. He had taken to massaging down her back and her sides until he had to get up. He took a hold of one of her hands and gently pressed his lips to her knuckles. “Gettin’ about that time. You ready?” He asked. She nodded and squeezed his hand as she felt pressure at her back where the doctor positioned the needle and administered the medication. It only took about twenty minutes for Georgia to feel some relief. 

Sam and Jake elected to leave the room then. Jake shook his brother's hand, hugged him, and kissed Georgia gently on the top of her head. Sam hugged Tyler and she rubbed her hand up and down Georgia's arm a few times. 

“Good luck!” Jake said as he and Sam marched out of the room and headed to the waiting area. The doctor and another nurse came in and prepared everything for the next stage. Georgia grabbed for Tyler then, nearly crushing his hand.

“Tyler. Don't go anywhere. Please.” She said, her eyes darting to his. He leaned down and kissed her on the forehead. He knew she was scared shitless right now. 

“No need to worry. I'm gonna be right here the whole time. No matter what.” He said softly. He stood to the side of the bed, as close as he could to her, his arm around her shoulders. Their doctor smiled as her and the nurse readied everything they needed in the event of complications. They had discussed what could go wrong and what they would do if something did happen, but they were hoping for an easy birth. 

“If it will help and you're comfortable with it, Tyler can sit behind you like he was earlier. I find especially with first time mothers, the more encouraging their birth partner is, the smoother it goes.” The doctor explained and without hesitation, Georgia scooted forward so that he could climb in behind her again. He locked her in with his legs on either side of her and placed his hands on her shoulders. He kissed her cheek, then rested the side of his head against hers. Georgia shifted uncomfortably, and Dr. Halstead reassured her that everything looked good so far.

“Okay, Georgia, you're gonna push on my count, ready? One, two, three, push!” Dr. Halstead's voice was calm but somehow excited. Georgia bared down, and as she did her grip on Tyler's thighs tightened. He'd probably have bruises there, but it would all be worth it in the end. 

At 3:01 AM, on February 28th, Jaycen Alexander Owens was born quietly, giving his parents the single most terrifying reason to hold their breaths...and a million reasons to finally let them out in relief. 

Jaycen didn't cry at first. Just like his father, the boy was reserved from the moment his eyes opened and took his first breath. Georgia feared for the worst, but in hearing her son's little whine, she was overcome with emotion. She was exhausted, panting, sweating bullets but she was so relieved and tears streamed down her cheeks as she watched the nurse take him and clean him up. 

Tyler was also crying. He wiped his tears on her shoulder as he waited for the nurse to bring their son to them. Now, it was all real. His dream had come true. After the nurse had dried him off, she wrapped Jaycen loosely in the blanket they brought, a sky blue one that was extra soft, and handed the little bundle to Georgia. She held him  gently to her chest, the first skin to skin contact sending a wave of happiness through her. He was slightly cooler than she'd anticipated, but Dr. Halstead reminded her that she just went through labor with nothing more than the epidural. Her body temperature and heart rate was up like she’d run a marathon from the incredible feat she’d accomplished.

Tyler stayed seated behind her and peered over her shoulder at the seven pounds, three ounces with sparse sandy brown hair atop his head. He looked tiny in Georgia's arms and Tyler was sure he'd look even smaller in his own. He reached around and ran a single finger over the soft hair on Jaycen's head. 

“That's our son, Gee. I'm so fuckin' proud of you, Peach.” He whispered, making her smile. She let out a sigh of relief as everyone else cleared the room. Dr. Halstead was going to let Jake and Sam know that Jaycen had arrived, but that Georgia needed to rest for a bit before they could go in and see her and the baby. The doctor gave Georgia a crash course on breastfeeding and helped her with the first time. When Jaycen took to it no problem, Dr. Halstead sighed.

“If only they could all be this easy!” She said and Tyler smirked.

“He’s an Owens. He’ll give us plenty of trouble later on.” He said and Dr. Halstead nodded. In order to make everything easiest for Georgia, they let her stay in the room she’d been in. As long as Jaycen remained healthy, they could take him home in the next couple of days, but for now, Tyler and Georgia would be staying there. 

After resting for a bit, Tyler asked Jake and Sam to enter the room. Jaycen was sleeping comfortably in Georgia’s arms so they were quiet. Jake actually cried. They were, of course, happy tears, congratulating his brother with a bear hug. Georgia offered for him to hold Jaycen and he readily accepted. Jake was so careful taking his nephew. Tyler, trying to not immediately be a helicopter parent in any sense of the word, left Jake to hold Jaycen, knowing his brother was more than responsible enough to hold a baby. Especially his own nephew. Sam was careful as she brushed her fingertips over Jaycen's little hairy head. She smiled wide and glanced up at Jake.

“You look pretty good with a baby in your arms.” She mused and Jake chuckled. 

“This is gonna be all I can think about, Sam.” He said softly, leaning over and pressing a kiss to her forehead. 

Over those couple of days, there had been an influx of people. Tyler and Jake’s parents were the first to show up, excited to meet their grandson with two legs. Then came all the Wranglers. Boone and Lily couldn’t wait to see the little bundle of joy. Javi came bearing gifts, some more clothes for Jaycen and he snuck away before Kate and Scott appeared. Kate was ecstatic, hugging Georgia and giving Tyler a punch on the arm. Scott was quiet and he simply congratulated them, but when Kate asked to hold Jaycen, it stirred something in Scott. Seeing the girl he’d developed feelings for with a baby in her arms, sent his mind to a far off place and he had no idea how to get his life there, or how to even begin the conversation he wanted to have with her. He wondered if it was even in his future. But that was all for another time. Dexter and Dani had popped in last, bringing some snacks for Tyler and Georgia and a little stuffed pony for Jaycen. 

Tyler and Georgia couldn’t wait to bring Jaycen home to meet the dogs and the horses. God knows especially Ducati would be waiting for him.

[paperstorm]

Favourite fandom memories

Watching 4x16 and 4x18 live. Watching every episode live is fun, but I don’t think there has ever been more unhinged joy in our little tumblr community (at least not in my time in this fandom, sadly I wasn’t here for Push or the engagement!) than during the soulmates scene and the wedding. The evening of 4x16 was off the charts, I remember it so vividly. We were all losing our entire minds – Carlos called them soulmates! Carlos said ‘baby’ not once but TWICE!!!!!!!! – and it was just so, so much fun. And the entire week of promo leading up to 4x18 was just dizzying and exciting and endlessly joyful, and the episode itself was such a whirlwind of heartbreak and ecstatic love and happiness and I will always be grateful I got to experience it with this lovely group of people.

Fics and art and gif makers! This fandom is more blessed than any I’ve ever been in with a deep bench of talented writers. My ‘to read’ list remains miles long despite my attempts to keep up with it and that’s because the writers around here are constantly churning out impeccable stories that are full of love and nuance and poetry and wonderful storytelling and HOT ASS SMUT and it’s been such a joy to get to read all your incredible work for FREE. And to the amazing artists, there are fewer of you but that means each of you shine even brighter when you give us such beautiful visual displays of Tarlos and our other favourite characters, bringing to life things that otherwise would only exist in our minds. And to the gif makes, the true backbone of tumblr fandoms, thank you for your tireless work and for colouring away the dull ass filters used on this show and brightening up scenes so we can actually SEE THEM and for noticing parallels and slowing down kisses and zooming in on hands and all the other wonderful things you do.

Friends! Everyone is saying this but it’s true for me too, the friendships are the best part of fandom and I have made such wonderful ones. I won’t tag them since they know who they are but to the people who I talk to on a daily (or near-daily) basis and plot fic with and complain with and enjoy the show with and send little presents to, who make me laugh, who listen and commiserate on cloudy days, who cheer me on, who hold me accountable and make me a better person, you’ve made this a fun place to be for years now and I hold every one of you close to my heart. (and if you have ever send me a nice anon, I hold you in this category too. We are friends, even though I don’t know your name)

TK Strand This is a bit of a diversion but a final thing I did want to say that TK means so, so much to me on such a deeply personal level, probably more than any other character I’ve ever loved. In this fandom I have been more honest about my own struggles than I’ve ever been online and it has been really heartwarming to have that (mostly) met with kindness. I am humbled by it and grateful for it <3

Thank you for creating this game @thisbuildinghasfeelings and to @annoyingcloudearthquake @strandnreyes @everlastingday @nancys-braids @reyesstrand @carlossreaders @nisbanisba @tellmegoodbye @heartstringsduet @freneticfloetry @firstprince-history-huh @carlos-in-glasses @bonheur-cafe @herefortarlos and @henrygrass for tagging me! I have been so busy lately I fully missed wip wednesday but I will go through this weekend and queue up all your fandom memory posts!!

[henrygrass]

9-1-1: Lone Star - Favorite Fandom Moments

Thank you @thisbuildinghasfeelings for coming up with this lovely idea, and for the tags @everlastingday @reyesstrand @carlossreaders @nisbanisba @tellmegoodbye @heartstringsduet @firstprince-history-huh @bonheur-cafe @carlos-in-glasses @chicgeekgirl89 @herefortarlos!

I haven't been part of the fandom for long; I joined somewhere at the end of October 2024, and I still consider myself new. Sometimes, I feel a little like an outsider, which has nothing to do with you all. You have been wonderful and supportive, truly!

Discovering Tarlos and Fanfiction

While I joined in October, I actually discovered 911LS in April 2024 when I, feeling bored, decided to type 'gay' into my Disney+ search. I wish I could say I saw a clip somewhere that made me look into 911LS, but nope, it was just me typing 'gay.' Who would have thought that I would fall in love with Tarlos and the whole bunch? Not me! I have never felt this way about any movie, TV show, or book—never. I binged the first four seasons and then rewatched them all right after finishing. Around July, I started wanting more. Now, I knew fanfiction existed; I just never got into it and never had the drive to read fan-created content until I came across a post on Reddit about Tarlos fanfictions. Missing Moments by @paperstorm was right there, and thus my Ao3 journey began.

Writing My Own Fics and Joining Tumblr

After reading various works, I started wanting to share my own. I had never written anything more than a couple of pages of random scenes, but I had this very clear idea in my mind for a Tarlos fic, so I just tried writing it. English is not my native language, and it was my first time writing a story in English, so my anxiety was through the roof when I decided to post the first chapter of Weep Not for Me. I kept telling myself that it was okay if people didn't like it, but then people did like it! I was elated at how welcoming the fandom is, and while Ao3 was great, joining Tumblr was the icing on the cake.

Now, she doesn't know this (I think), but the main reason this account even exists is @nisbanisba. I recognized her from Ao3, formally made an actual account, and followed her on here. Thanks to her, I got to connect with so many people! I'm always amazed by how different this corner of the internet is from my past experiences—how nice people are, even to newcomers and strangers like me.

Watching Season 5 Live

It's such a great experience to read everyone's thoughts about an episode as it airs for the first time! The reactions to scenes, the comments that add depth or make me notice things I otherwise wouldn't have, the theories, and, most of all, the giggles over shared moments like Owen heroically galloping on Thunder or TK's birthday party—so many moments that I would have otherwise experienced alone, in my own bubble, but instead I enjoyed in the dead of night at 2 AM with so many of you. Special thanks to @tellmegoodbye and @ironheartwriter for the Discord server that allows me to catch these last episodes (the link I used to use stopped working, but they saved me). While it's too soon for the show to end, I'm glad I got to enjoy this last season of a show that means so much to me with everyone here.

The show may be ending, but the characters will always remain, and I hope that most (if not all) of you will continue to share this love for 911LS—whether through gifs, fics, art, music, or anything else. I know I will.

I'm not sure who has or hasn't done this so, I'll leave an open tag!

[btsjk-biased]

Yoongi 🩶 Love Yourself: Tear (for @yooboobies)

[ video source cr. namuspromised ]

[mamawasatesttube]

kon sweetie im so fucking sorry that someone would even say something stupid like that oh my god.

[samijey]

Sami seemed to strike a big nerve with Jey last night

[lancedoncrimsonwings]

Rewatching Cursed (again) and damn I forgot how much Merlin whump there is I mean

Dude straight up ain't having a good time at ALL

I actually started watching Cursed purely for Gustaf Skarsgård because Floki, then realised Dan Sharman was in it and promptly died. Obviously The Weeping Monk became my obsession but we still fuckin love Merlin too.

And all the whump in general is just *chefs kiss*. We get a little bit of lady whump too, which I also love (just never see much of it), particularly Nimue.

Amusingly enough, I came in as a Nimlot (Lancelot/The Weeping Monk x Nimue) shipper, and I still DO like that ship, even actively still read Nimlot fics, buuuttt when I got to THAT torture tent conversation?

Then Lancewain became and solidly remains my fave.

Ok now to get back to my regular scheduled The Weeping Monk and Gawain

[sourtrot]

THXX!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! flowers and confetti for all of you! 💋🥳

[namor-shuri]

Marvel Studios Assembled & Wakanda Forever Podcast: Namor/Shuri + Tenoch/Letitia Moments

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Marvel Studios Assembled: The Making of Wakanda Forever [available on Disney +] [w/ time stamps to follow along]

▻ The whole cast comforted and gave Letitia a group hug at San Diego Comic Con as she broke down [Tenoch kissed her shoulder] [0:27]

▻ “We know what Black Panther is but what makes it a Black Panther movie? If we were to do another one….how would audiences recognize it?” - Ryan Coogler [Director] [5:44]

▻ We learn that Namor’s character was discussed to be in Black Panther 2 while the first movie was being written. “In the comics, the two worlds have a great rivalry” - Joe Robert Cole [Screenwriter] [13:25]

▻ Ryan was interested in Meso-American culture for the Talokanil and “…upon research it became more clear that the people of the Yucatán made a ton of sense.” - Ryan Coogler [Director] [14:40] They wanted to give Namor a culture/background different from the comic book version [a white man]. “Their [Mayan] artwork and their advanced agriculture…all of these things that they accomplished, it was a perfect palette for us to delve into.” - Joe Robert Cole [Screenwriter] [16:40]

▻ Namor’s costumes and headpieces are curated from post Yucatec Mayan culture roots. “We used a lot of kelp and things to make the headdress and hand wove his cape, but we kept it pure to what he looked like in the comics.” - Ruth Carter [Costume Designer] [17:50]

▻ Ryan and Hannah Beachler [Production Designer] show us the set of Namor’s cave and explain the time/labor that went into creating this elaborate set. Ryan points to the mural painting of Namor and the Black Panthers fight. “This one’s my favorite one” - Ryan Coogler [Director] [22:25] We learn that the style of art is “Bonampak”

▻ Letitia had to learn how to swim for her role, along with the majority of the cast. “I struggled with it. Ryan called me and he was like ‘Tish, can you swim?’ I was like ‘Sir, sir, I’m in the lab. What more do you need from me coming out of that lab?” - Letitia Wright [Shuri] [26:06]

▻ All of the water scenes were half filmed under water, called “wet for wet”, and filmed outside of the water, called “dry for wet” scenes. The exosuits [Shuri is shown wearing one when exploring Talokan] were real suits that were also filmed underwater and were about a million and a half dollars each [explained by Chris Denison, Stunt Coordinator] [29:40]

▻ A clip of Letitia Wright’s “Screen Test (2016)” from the first Black Panther is shown [41:54] and we learn that Dominique Thorne [Riri Williams] also auditioned for Shuri’s role a while back

▻ The cast had differing emotions/opinions than Ryan about the decision to kill Queen Ramonda [played by Angela Basset]. “When I read that Ramonda was going to die by the hands of Namor, I was very upset. I think I almost cried on the phone to Ryan.” - Letitia Wright [Shuri] [43:43] Ryan and the writers felt her death would be a big “motivator”/ transformative moment in Shuri’s development and the eventual break down of her character to become the Black Panther [her arc]

▻ Ryan supported and pushed Letitia during the whole process of becoming the Black Panther to do her best work and continuously reminded her of who she was and what she was capable of when stepping into the role. Letitia wished Chad could have passed the torch to her himself to do it [46:02] + [55:03]

▻ [Referring to the making of Shuri’s Black Panther suit] “We were working with the design language of silver being representative of T’Challa, gold being representative of T’Chaka, and the little bit of where Killmonger’s coming from…We’re essentially taking those two elements and combining them.” - Ryan Meinerding [Head of visual development] [46:58]

▻ “Shuri vs Namor. We put alot into that fight.” - Aaron Toney [Fight Coordinator] [49:59] We see that a lot of the BTS of their big fight on the desert were shot with different individual sets with Tenoch, Letitia and stunt actors, separately and together. “I’m so proud of it. Shuri’s looking amazing, Namor’s looking amazing.” - Letitia Wright [Shuri] [50:27] Their fighting styles are explained to be very different, where Shuri is more calculated and Namor is more in his body. “With Namor, when it came to fighting styles, I pulled from….cultural aspects like Lucha Libre…asian cultures…I pulled from a style called Baji.” - Aaron Toney [Fight Coordinator] [50:49]

▻ “Processing in a way of expressing her pain and fury towards Namor, she thinks that’s going to be satisfying to her soul and it’s not….I think that’s a beautiful way to complete that arc, to realize that my brother wouldn’t do this, my mother wouldn’t want this for me….We see Shuri become a woman in her own right.” - Letitia Wright [Shuri] [53:00]

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Wakanda Forever: The Official Black Panther Podcast [Hosted by Ta-Nehisi Coates]: Chapter 5 w/ Letitia Wright, Tenoch Huerta, Dr. Gerardo Aldana [available on Spotify]

▻ “What does it mean when Wakanda and Talokan give us a beauty created not to justify enslavement but to celebrate freedom?” - Ta-Nehisi Coates [Host]

▻ Tenoch continues to put the spotlight back on indigenous communities/culture and does not claim to be apart of their experiences. “I don’t practice the culture so it is impossible to name myself indigenous….I’m not pretending to be something that I’m not…I’m just trying to honor my ancestors.” - Tenoch Huerta [Namor]

▻ A fan went to the movies with his Mayan grandma and she began to translate scenes herself while watching the film with him. “The Mayan group in LA said it [the character’s Mayan in the movie] sounds beautiful. You have an accent, it sounds good! They were happy with it.” - Tenoch Huerta [Namor]

▻ “Why are these two groups [Wakandans and the Talokanil] fighting each other? Why can’t they get together and go beat the colonizer?…I am a huge Black Panther fan but I was sitting there and found myself rooting for the Talokanil!” - Ta-Nehisi Coates [Host]

▻ Letitia was bullied in school for her appearance when she was growing up (ex. her size, being African, etc) “I kind of let that go…I talked myself out of the idea that I should be like anyone else.” She found comfort/ amusement in going viral on TikTok. “It’s definitely flattering but I’m really shocked…I’ve never been crushed on before in school…As a black woman, I’m moving into a space where I’m finally being called beautiful but I didn’t wait for them [the media/world] to tell me that at first. I told it to myself.” - Letitia Wright [Shuri]

▻ “This is the highest grossing movie with the lead character as a black woman and it’s you [Letitia]. How does that feel?” - Ta-Nehisi Coates [Host]

▻ “The love that Shuri has for T’challa is the love that Letitia has for Chadwick and that’s intertwined.” Letitia shares her initial hesitancy about doing the film without Chadwick after his passing and taking on the mantle as Black Panther. “I see it as I’m a vessel. I’m a trusted vessel that’s here to honor my brother.” - Letitia Wright [Shuri]

▻ Letitia laughs about fun moments they had on the set of Wakanda Forever. “He [Ryan Coogler] would say Namor and the Black Panther are having a conversation. It’s a big movie. Turn your phones off!” - Letitia Wright [Shuri]

[crowsofdarkness]

Vaz Prizrak: Chapter Two

-gif not mine. credit to owner-

Pairings: Bucky Barnes x Female Agent! Reader.

Content Warnings: language, 18 + implied smut, angst, fluff, violence, mentions of losing a pregnancy, thoughts of taking one's life, an attempt to take one's life. I will give another warning when that chapter is posted.

Summary: Bucky and Reader have been in their own solace while in Wakanda for years. They were finally happy to create the life they wanted and deserved. That was until a new foe came along to dust it all away.

Authors Note: This takes place during Infinity War and Endgame! If you haven't yet, please read Soldat and Dorogaya beforehand.

Tags: @globetrotter28 @sakuracyberhex @chinggay85-blog @bookofriverr @misatxox @that-blonde-girl @cats-chaotic-mind @wintrsoldrluvr @sebastians-love @pumpkin-babydoll @ordelixx @starfly-nicole @j23r23 @baw1066 @capswife

Soldat Masterlist | Dorogaya Masterlist | Vaz Prizrak Masterlist

The town square of Wakanda was busy with bodies getting ready for the soon arrival and as Bucky and I stood hand in hand, I could help the way my heart jumped with nerves. I was nervous for the fight and nervous to see Steve again after so long. 

My hair blew with the wind as the jet made its final descent, coming to a halt in front of us. As the ramp opened, I saw my old friends ascend down. They couldn’t see us and I took it as an opportunity to sneak away from them and Bucky, the nerves becoming too much to handle. Bucky was talking with Steve so he hadn’t noticed me walk away. 

Everything was happening too fast and I didn’t have the chance to stop to think about what the outcome would be. 

Maybe Bucky and I could leave, let them fight this on their own. We could go back to our normal lives, something that we both deserved. This wasn’t our fight, we didn’t have to risk our lives for this. 

However, I knew that when it was our fight years ago, all of these people were there to help us, no questions asked. 

“Where’s Y/N?” A voice asked. 

“She was right here,” Bucky said. 

Coming into view, I smiled over towards my friends while giving Sam and Nat a long overdue hug. I nodded towards Wanda who was walking inside with a hurt Vision. 

“How’re you doing?” Nat asked. 

I nodded. “Not bad, for the end of the world.” 

“What’s up Marshmallow?” 

Laughing at the nickname coming from Sam, I lightly punched him in the shoulder. “You had to come along?” 

“Someone has to watch his back,” Sam mentioned towards Steve. 

He was already watching me with intent eyes as I walked over to him, closing the distance between us. 

“I see you took my advice,” I pointed towards the beard and long hair. 

Steve shrugged while wrapping his arms around me in a longing hug. I had missed the way that they felt, protecting me from anything bad. 

“How are you, really?” Steve questioned, lifting my chin to look into my eyes. 

“We’re fine, Steve,” I spoke quietly. “Bucky is good. He’s his old self.” 

Steve nodded before looking between Bucky and I. “Mind if I steal her for a bit? Catch her up to speed?” 

Bucky hesitated, only I saw it, before nodding. “Sure.” 

I closed the large distance between us with a loving kiss. “Don’t worry.” 

With his new fingers on my lower back, he pressed his lips against mine once again, this time longer and deeper. 

“I love you,” he muttered against them. 

“I love you too.” 

“You look like hell,” I noticed Sam as we all stood in the middle of Shuri’s lab. 

A very familiar place to me. 

“Well the motels weren’t exactly five stars,” Sam admitted with a small laugh. 

I then nodded towards Bruce and Nat, who themselves were having a private conversation. 

“Talk about awkwardness, huh?” 

Sam laughed again. “You have no idea.” 

“Y/N.” 

Excusing myself from Sam, I walked over towards Steve, who was standing in front of a large window, looking down towards the fields of Wakanda. 

“Does everything make sense?” He asked. 

“Yeah, as crazy as it sounds.” I said 

“And you’re ready for it?” He asked again, motioning towards my hands. “Bucky mentioned that you haven’t used it for awhile.” 

I grasped my hands together with a sigh. “I wanted something normal for us. To be honest, I don’t even know if it still works. I haven’t found a reason to get mad lately.” 

“With what’s coming, I think it would be best to get mad,” Steve suggested. 

Silence fell between us and I was going to walk away from him but his hand in mind stopped me. 

“Can you promise me something?” 

I nodded. 

“Promise that no matter what comes, that you take care of yourself first. Don’t worry about Buck or I. I can’t deal if something would happen to you,” Steve admitted while gently cupping my cheek. 

Licking my dry lips at the warmth of his glove, I nodded again. 

“Only if you do something for me,” I spoke. 

“Anything,” he breathed. 

“If something does happen to me, make sure he moves on. I don’t want him to dwell on it. He deserves to be happy,” I said with a shaky breath. 

Steve hesitated for a moment before nodding, letting out a large breath. 

“But it’s not going to come to that, right?” 

Tearing myself away from Steve’s sad gaze, I looked towards Natasha and nodded. 

“Can she do it?” I asked, changing the subject and walking away from Steve. 

The questionable outcome weighed heavy on my mind but there was always one thing that was clear. If something were to happen to me, whatever it was, I needed to make sure that Bucky moved on. He couldn’t dwell on me or what happened. It was true what I told Steve; Bucky deserved to be happy, even if I had passed. 

Suddenly, a loud bang sounded from above us, shaking the castle. I looked around everyone in the room before my eyes landed finally on Steve, a knowing look on his face. 

“They’re here,” I said. 

“Get this man a shield!” T’challa pointed towards Steve before shouting more directions to others. 

“Bucky,” I muttered while leaving the room and sprinting outside the castle. 

Bucky and Sam were standing in the middle of the town center, staring up towards the sky. 

Gunshots rain down on us but thankfully they couldn’t break the barrier that was protecting us. 

“God, I love this place,” Bucky admitted. 

“You guys alright?” I questioned while standing in between them. 

Sam nodded. “How’re they doing up there?” 

“It’s going to take awhile for Shuri to recreate a stone,” I admitted. 

We watched in slight horror when ships came from the sky, landing right outside the protective dome. 

“Cap, we’ve got a situation out here.” I said into my com. 

The grass flattened beneath my boots as we stood on the open field, preparing ourselves for the fight. 

“Doll?” 

I looked over to Bucky. “Hm?” 

Without saying a word, handed me one of his guns, silently knowing that I wasn’t quite ready to use my powers. 

“Be careful,” he said. 

“You too,” I spoke while lacing our fingers together.

My attention was averted from Bucky as I shook my fingers, trying to bring the spark to life, but groaned in defeat. 

I never would have thought that when I decided to not use them any more that it would backfire. Now would be the perfect time to be able to use them. 

“Did they surrender?” I asked Steve as he returned to his spot next to me. 

T’challa, Nat, and him walked down to the edge of the barrier, trying to talk to the alien species. 

“Not exactly,” he sighed. 

Suddenly, thousands of aliens came from the ships, running towards the barrier that was protecting us, killing themselves in the process. 

“They’re killing themselves,” I muttered. 

The few that made it through, alive, charged towards us and without a second thought, all of us raised our weapons to prepare for war. 

Bucky and I shot bullets towards the aliens that made it close to us. I knew, deep down, that no matter how many bullets we had or knives I used, it wouldn’t be enough. 

“You know, Y/N, now would be a perfect time to toast these fuckers,” Sam’s voice came through the com in my ear. 

“You don’t think I’ve tried!” I yelled. “It’s not working!” 

A simple snap of the fingers and nothing. 

“What’s stopping them from trying to enter behind us?” I asked Steve, when I noticed the aliens running around the barrier. 

“We need to open the barrier,” T’challa stated. 

Looking between Steve and Bucky, two men who I would protect with my heart and knowing they would do the same for me. 

“We’re with each other till the end, right?” I asked them both. 

“Always,” Steve spoke. 

“Forever, doll.” Bucky gave a quick kiss to the side of my head. 

With a loud war cry, our army charged forward as T’challa gave the order to open the barrier. Thousands of aliens sprinting towards us.