#but this new update doesn't care about any damn lore in some ways and it does it in a fun way

[slime-crafters]

To be fair, this is kind of a fairy vs walrus situation.

Like, it's much easier to accept/think it's normal that I have forest magic given to me by a wizard who's also the town hermit and that drinking green tea makes me hallucinate, but it's too much to believe that green water rains down and causes the entire valley to be absolutely flooded with fiber and magically-growing trees and also it makes you feel like you're in the apocalypse the first time it happens

The best thing about the new stardew update is you can tell concerned ape got comfortable just being fucking weird. Which is understandable considering most indie devs have to be some level of insane

[fyeahnix]

Been thinking about Sevika a bit and I had some thoughts.... Vander included as well.

First off I'm leaving this untagged because I don't want the wrong people to get a hold of this but you can reblog if you want.

Second, to be clear, I have not seen/read/consumed any leaks about anything related to Arcane out of choice. I wanted to see this series unfold on release days and enjoy being unspoiled with most of the rest of the fandom. Nothing I say here regarding theories will have anything to do with leaks. If they do, I promise you it's coincidence or I'm just good at reading the tea leaves. That being said, please for my sake and the people reading this post, don't be an asshole and say anything related to any leaked content, vague mention or not. Actually if you read any leaks related to this, I'd really prefer if you kept any and all comments to yourself. This is primarily for folks like me who are just theorizing for fun until we get more officially released info.

Anyway let me start..

Life and Death

As I've said before, I am still fearing Sevika's death. That remains true even after Act 1 of the season has concluded. We know from the teasers and trailers that Sevika is getting a wardrobe update and a new look for Act 2 and beyond. But I still fear what will happen. I do think her situation can either go one of two ways:

Sevika Lives

I haven't had a chance to actually write this out in a fic yet but one of my headcanons for Sevika is that she'd heavily reconsider the real fight for Zaun if she met someone who she really and truly grew to care for and love. And not because she's flaky or Zaun doesn't matter. But because these life and death situations are incredibly more difficult when you have people in mind to protect. What happens if you die? Who will protect them when you're gone? Is it worth setting them up for heartache by putting yourselves in the line of fire? That's a lot to consider.

Season 1 showed us that Sevika thought Vander was weak for not taking the fight to Zaun a second time. But what she didn't understand was that he had loved ones to look after—kids. Would it be worth making them parentless a second time for Zaun's liberation? Who would look after them? That's a tough question to answer. And I think the rest of this season will build up to Sevika coming to the same realization that Vander and Silco did before her—is putting my home and life in danger worth risking losing my loved ones or my loved ones losing me?

I hate that now I just look like a damn copycat if this ends up coming to fruition but that's just the stress of being a slow ass writer. Oh well lol.

In any case, since it looks like Jinx is gonna be the real deal when it comes to taking the fight to Piltover, I'm willing to bet that Zaun will win their independence. It looks like they have it now in the current (now old) League lore so I don't think that outcome will change. If that wasn't the case, I'd say Sevika would probably give that fight up and live or straight up leave Zaun to go elsewhere.

Sevika Dies

I can see Sevika's death happen one of two ways:

1) Killed by Enforcers. This is obvious. Unfortunately it happens to a lot of Zaunites. I can see this happening to her either by getting caught somewhere unawares or protecting either Jinx and/or Isha.

2) Warwick*. This is...a tricky one. Most of us who know the absolute bare minimum of League lore know that Warwick is a genetically modified werewolf created by Singed but outside of that, I don't think we ever got his full identity (I know Riot has a short story for him but I haven't read it). It's pretty obvious by now that Vander is becoming Warwick. The big question is going to be what does that mean for the rest of the characters and Zaun? And how much of his memories will Warwick retain from being Vander?

If he does retain flashes of those memories, I can see him being pissed about what he may see as a betrayal and decide to kill Sevika for supporting Silco.....

More On Vander/Warwick

....HOWEVER....

I think it's also completely possible that Warwick retains some of his memories BUT encounters Sevika while she's with Jinx and Isha. And his memories of Jinx stop him from killing Sevika which would be VERY INTERESTING for two reasons. One, I think it would mean a lot to him to see his kid being protected and accepted by someone he felt betrayed him. That maybe he thought wrong of her because this kid he once knew as sweet and innocent likes her. And two, Jinx says to Smeech right before their fight that people close to her usually end up dead. Well what if Sevika ends up alive when confronting Warwick because she's around Jinx? That would be an interesting flip from last season and that statement overall.

Second point here. About Zaun's liberation, what if Warwick ends up being a key weapon to helping liberate them? The Chem Tanks attack on Piltover was devastating and if it wasn't for the Noxians, they would have caused quite a lot of destruction. Warwick's abilities are unknown right now and it doesn't even look like he's fully completed his transformation. The Enforcers hear about a giant ass wolf man monster roaming the streets of Zaun or too many die at his hands and are like "actually nvm they can fucking have their independence."

I'm almost sure the creators have said it's possible for more Arcane characters to become Legends in League so maybe Sevika could become one at some point? Idk

So yeah I am still bracing myself for the worst but ultimately just enjoying any screen time we get with her. According to the intro sequence, she ain't important enough to make a main character, so it's possible she's doomed OR she might be one of the characters who has their story expanded in a future League universe work when Arcane ends, which I'm almost sure will happen with Ambessa.

[ashes-writing-corner]

Life update

Aka life sucks and I hate it

Tw for dark/suicidal thoughts (don't worry I haven't and will not do anything)

I'm trying so fucking hard to try and do better for myself. I've dedicated myself to a writing project, and one that I love, and I'm not getting anything for it. I don't know what to do for it. I get nothing. I get no likes. No reblogs. No followers. I actually lost one...out of SIX! Five followers on my writing blog and that's it.

I'm gonna try and keep things as organized here as I can because I am really damn emotional right now. I have had some really dark thoughts this morning and I don't know what to do.

For folks who don't know, I work at build a bear as my primary job. And I love it. I absolutely love it. It's been a big part of helping heal from some pretty bad stuff. The problem is I don't get a lot of hours. I get paid more than what I did when I was working fast food, but I don't work as much. I'm pretty sure you can see how this is a problem.

This is part of the reason why I started a patreon. I eventually do want to make writing content my full time job. I know it's not easy. And maybe I'm being a little hasty and expecting too much too fast, but I am in a pretty serious financial bind. I have a phone bill due, I have to put money on my bus pass so that I can continue to go to work. I also have a bearded dragon who I still need to get food and supplies for (no matter what he comes first. Mostly food. Little man eats better than I do). All the while I am struggling to feed myself and struggling to help my mom and my sister with bills. My mom's boyfriend is an abusive prick who barely does anything for her. He brings junk food to the table and that's about it.

I earn so little now that I practically can't even afford to put money away. I put any spare change I have away in a lock box so I can turn it in at the end of the month. But it's all getting to be too much.

And today it's just really hitting really hard. I can't get a second job because I can't handle two jobs that I can't control at the same time. I can write whenever I want so thats why I can handle juggling my job and this.

I thought when I moved my life up here to the north that I would get far more support. And it would seem so to anyone on the outside looking in. But since I announced my patreon launch, no one has supported me. No one has asked me how my writing is going. No one has asked me anything and barely given me any encouragement. I feel like no one actually cares. I feel like no one gives a damn except to make themselves look/feel good. And that sucks beyond words. It makes me feel used if I'm being honest.

My situation has actually gotten so bad that I seriously considered this morning trying to find a way to end it all. My parents down south hate me. My older sister doesn't speak to me even to check on me. And I thought that it was okay, that I didn't need them. I have my biomom and my sister up here and we help each other but it's just...not enough. I just feel very dark about everything right now. I'm not gonna do anything crazy, I don't have a means to and right now I'm just sad and feeling worthless and like I'm putting all this work in for nothing.

Essentially I'm working on two books at the same time. In addition to In the Heart of Winter, which I post here, I'm also posting lore on my patreon for my story to sort of help fill in the blanks for things I might not get around to in the story. And it's a lot of work. In addition, I also make the collages at the beginning of each new chapter, and I post those to my Instagram. Basically the only things I post there. I just...I feel like I'm doing all of this for nothing. And a part of me is wondering why the hell I'm even bothering.

And I tell that part of myself that I'm doing it because I want to. Because this is my dream. And dreams aren't easy. They're hard work and dedication. Even though I feel like my world is crashing down around me, I can't give up. I won't. It's not easy, but I've never needed easy. All I need right now is possible and that's what I'm going for.

If you can, if you read this far thanks, but if you can, please, please donate to my patreon, it's in my pinned post, and please follow my Instagram. Should also be linked or at least it's got the same name as my blog here. When/if I make a YouTube channel, I intend to link that too. I feel pathetic for this but I really feel like I don't have a choice.

Thank you

[geek-gem]

My thoughts on the upcoming Doom movie reboot

This is something I haven't never really talked about. Especially I first went on Tumblr to search for any people talking of it. Yet theirs hardly or just barely anything. Especially I didn't wanna look through the whole thing but doom movie reboot doesn't work.

But just in case if anyone is wondering yeah theirs a Doom movie reboot that's being made I forgot if their in post production or not. But it's gonna be straight to DVD or whatever whether streaming or whatever.....

Basically this is gonna be me rambling and it isn't much of a rant but could be. Also just how I feel like a Doom movie should of gone.....yet also me talking about the realistic nature of why maybe something like my ideas wouldn't happen but it sounds like bullshit considering certain R rated films.

Honestly the Doom movie reboot is a film I'm not interested in. Basically when I found out it was straight to DVD and not gonna be released in theaters. I wasn't interested.

Especially over time I didn't cared for the movie more as time went on considering certain news updates.

Honestly I seriously dislike how this movie just came out of nowhere to me personally unless their was an announcement. It was first found out when one of the actors seriously tweeted about being casted in the film and gonna say I got this from Mr. H Reviews he's done videos on these.

It's kind of crazy I mean unless they were gonna announce it. It's just stupid that it's just so secretive. Especially why straight to DVD why couldn't it be in theaters? In fact as a big Doom fan and Doomguy/Doomslayer fan the idea of a movie reboot that's good is something want.

Listen I never wanna see the old 2005 film. Even though when I was young I saw moments. But as a fan of the series and hearing so much shit about it I don't wanna even see the film.

Well I've heard some little details that are nice but just......it's weird to talk about and I don't wanna sound toxic.

But why can't we have a big R rated fun action film that's brutal as fuck and has a kick ass soundtrack. With Mick Gordon doing the music like the 2016 reboot and the upcoming Doom Eternal game.(2nd edit also music like from Disturbed and Five Finger Death Punch and other metal bands too)

Seriously I have ideas and even casting choices.

Such as the brilliant fan casting of Tom Hardy as Doomguy/Doomslayer. While I feel now these days Tom Hardy might not be interested in a role like Doomguy. Yet considering works like Mad Max Fury Road he might. Also while I've tried to think of other actors but it's very difficult especially to fit the lore. But honestly Tom Hardy kicks ass he fits.

Including other casting choices like Jamie Lee Curtis as Olivia Pierce. While I have thought of Liam Nesson. It's just Darin De Paul is so damn good as Samuel Hayden why the hell replace him. Had to Google Liam's last name and samuel hayden voice actor which is on a Google screen. Honestly this voice acting thing should go to Vega as well.

While yes I'm thinking more of the basis of the movie based upon the 2016 reboot. I've had ideas what if it's a mixture of the original games like Doom 1 and 2. Along with the reboot don't worry Hell On Earth would be the sequel. Basically the whole idea the original games took place in the 2020's but still.(2nd edit still most likely 2149 like the 2016 game)

I've seen ideas people mentioning of what if a Doom movie that's like Hardcore Henry. I've never seen that movie yet I've read the story on Wikipedia and the idea is great. Yet the original idea for me people might not like. But it would be done in a way respectful to the games.

I've seen people talked about Dredd 2012 and how it should be like that film and that film is fucking awesome. But the idea is Doomguy is still Doomguy. Yet the more character stuff you'll get will be with other characters who join along with Doomguy. As a joke he's basically baby sitting these characters and their trying to help out. While it still has Doomguy be this quiet protagonist that really speaks loud with his actions and also in some moments showing his humanity still.

Especially get a reference to Daisy in there some how.

Especially Doomguy is still the protagonist while we have other characters that can talk as they react and try to interact with Doomguy in some ways. Especially if they try to help him.

Yet honestly one thing that got me thinking and I guess is a road block. What about the whole idea is this the same Doomguy from the classic games and the reboot series where he's gone through dimensions and shit. Yes I'm one of those people who goes with that especially with Quake Champions confirming it. Or is it a whole different Doomguy being a badass and has the same agenda. It's a weird thing to think about but I'm probably thinking about it too much.

Yet honestly when I think about it but let me say this. Universal has the money to do this. Their one of the biggest companies and they have the money to back it up.

Or are they seriously scared of what happened with the first film. Is it a big risk probably so to do a film like what I'm talking about it probably is. But we have films that have been R rated and being big box office hits whether their low budget or whatever else.

Also I should get to the big thing.....the whole female Doomguy shit that was tweeted and people were pissed off and it bothered me as well. Especially nights ago I remember speaking to myself watching Christopher Ridge's video on the movie reboot and his thoughts on what's going on. I don't watch his channel much really yet it made me think but still I'm bothered.

Listen I have nothing against female protagonists and....I might sound stupid I weirdly want that in Doom while Doomguy is still the main character. I ignore the novels because people disown those novels and from what I heard they go in a completely different direction.

But I feel yeah Doomguy is the base character for the player. Yet over time the character has I guess involved where he's basically his own character while you can still be him. Especially just whatever story parts while story isn't as important as gameplay it's something I look at. I would like Doomguy portrayed accurately.

Honestly while I've read a comment below Christopher Ridge's video on the movie with the tweet that someone said fans could be assuming or whatever. We don't know if Doomguy is in the movie. I do agree with Christopher or if I remember he mentioned that actress should of maybe not said that or should of been more careful about saying that. Because that seriously bothered me as such a big fan of the character Doomguy/Doomslayer himself.

I feel or might of forgotten stuff that is maybe all I have to say.

Tags done and decided to put this in the charger before tags. I just wanted to mention my opinions about this. Thinking of it I'll post my opinions on the film if it gets a trailer hopefully. If it gets one and not released out if nowhere hopefully.

Especially if we get a film with ideas like mine. Can we get hash tags like, #ripandtear and #alldemonsmustdie #killalldemons and more whatever else

Edit glad theirs no notes on this yet. But I went to the bathroom and seriously forgot adding an awesome image to this because I want to.

I just love that image and I basically want a film like that, live action with some CGI and practical demons. CGI for ones that need it. Along having some story but it's basically Doomguy/Doomslayer kicking hell's ass.