#but they still have *time* now within the mansion... auugh | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

datastate · 2 years ago

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oh also i haven’t mentioned this yet bc a lot of my liveblogging/thoughts has just been kept between my siblings and i lately but it’s both funny and hurts my heart to see sirius act like this :’]

he does keep associating the event with lady dorothy, and that is in part why he’s so visibly panicked, but it’s also because he still. cares about claire... even if he doesn’t want to admit it, or doesn’t fully recognize it. he is going out of his way trying to keep her safe even though noel didn’t tell him to do any of this and didn’t even expect sirius would believe him. sirius in these attempts has gone so far that he doesn’t even consider that he would be killed with claire should it come down to it.

#it hurts me very much...#he's so. terrible at expressing himself. and i think the doodling scene really emphasizes that too #like yeah i can point at it and be like lmao the autism in this guy (bad with facial expressions) but it's also just...#it indicates so much about how he perceives himself versus how it always comes across #he's someone who's been living in isolation/in the past and he hates obvious changes to his schedule #the abruptness of these people being obligated to stay the night (something larger) but also seeing claire frown/get upset. it unnerves him #as ''annoying'' as he may think claire is; he still finds her familiarity comforting & she is one of the ONLY people that he #ever had a chance at forming a bond with as he grew up. if it weren't for noel's disappearance & nicholas' attempts for the heart;#he would slowly begin to lose that codependence (dorothy) & find a balance - being able to connect w normal people again #or not even just that but... someone who experienced something similar to him. and is trying to move forward #what wilardo says during the drawings holds true. their preconceptions are what makes up who they are but it also holds them back #they need to both learn from each other and if they were given time earlier they could've done it #but they still have *time* now within the mansion... auugh #or if they can escape... hopefully...#bah. hard to articulate things right now but altho it's complicated These two wound me severely #jestersvaguely #whlb

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