#but then panik comes back and im like o no what if i really am just biased and a horrible person and i really was awful and mean and cruel

[ko-eko-ev-go-ms]

Y’all ever just read through old convos to try and figure out solutions to problems only to just get more mad/salty lol

[student-film-lying-piece-of-shit]

Splentoby plas

fine. ok. ill do this. PLEASE keep in mind in these headcanons toby isn't a minor and that we can assume he's 19+ (he doesn't have a set set canon age? he supposingly dies before age 20 idk man it's vague please don't drag me into discourse i headcanon him as an adult in non au settings)

splendor hcs / splendortoby. yall asked for it. if i get hung im blaming u guys

also these r months old they're from amino. let's go

he can move his face and mouth! it's not forever stuck like (:

- he listens to nightcore unironically look me in the eyes and tell me he doesn't

- he is pansexual!! n cis

- he lowkey feels isolated and lonely from the others, trying his best to be a help but nobody rlly appericates it so he's :(

- he has magical capabilities! he can summon little things around him (think maybe the wadern from superjail?) like ie he will move his hands and a rainbow comes out of his hand

- he fucking LOVES minecraft and for the first 4 times he played he tried to like tame a creeper and BEN was just "you can Not Do That Splendor"

"he's my friend!!!!!!"

"you can tame how many animals and you try to tame an enemey splendor he will blow you up"

"): my friend..."

- he tends to get a lot of romantic crushes on humans but is terrorfied of pursuing them because he's!!! an ugly monster n their :3 to him

- he has an ability to make himself invisible to adults and only visible to kids/those who can 'believe' that he uses in public because slenders always like. "DON'T SHOW UR IDENTITY TO THE H U M A N S!!!!!!!"

- he likes 80's music a fucking lot. like. a LOT.

- he's friends w/ sally (duh), BEN (the one who got him into Minecraft), Jane, EJ and Toby!!!!

- he had feelings for jane until she was just "sorry, i like girls" and he was

"!!!! I do too!!!!! You funky lil lesbian keep it up!!!!!!!!"

- HE DOES HAVE A HUMAN FORM !!! he's the only slender who has a soild human form! However it drains him a lot to use it so he doesn't use it a lot,,,,

- he cries gold!!!! Liquid, his blood is like? pastel blue? his body liquids r pastel gore basically

- he, yes, is a brony. his favorite is pinkie pie

- he doesn't have a secret evil form shut the fuck up and let me have my son!!!!! i refuse!!!! no!!!!!!!!!!! he does NOT!!!!!!!!

- he has had a weird crush on toby for a while and he's never mentioned anything because "that is,, someone who works for my brother,,,,,,,that is,,,,, his proxy,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,"

- his human name is Romeo!!!!!!!!

- he's a huge mommas boy :3 he calls her everynight to tell her he loves her and she's just "okay cool" and he's "!!!!!!!SLEEP WELL"

- he's fucking shitfaced scared of zalgo lmao

okay im gonna indulge in this weird crack ship for three seconds here wait

- toby always rides on his back!!!!!!

- splendor always leaves him candy and stuff in his room anonymously or notes and toby's just "huh who did this" but than one time he saw splendor sign something and he was

"it's YOU??????????"

- toby: this is my giant monster boyf-

splendor, crying: am i a monster

toby: GOD NO I LOVE YOU

- slender finding out is just "literally what the fuck idc anymore do what by any means you guys want ive seen it all now"

- toby always also rides on his tendrils!!! he uses them as swings fuck you this is my headcanon list I'll do what i want

- they go to the fair n stuff when it's town n splendor goes into his human form and they have a good Time!!!!!!

- splendor gets toby really cute binders w/ designs n stuff!!!!! To make him feel a lot better abt himself and toby loves it half to death

- toby, crying: i don't know im sorry i never told you i was trans. please don't think of me different.

splendor, a creature that's been living for centuries, 11 feet tall w/ vague human traits: i would NEVER

- tobys the first human splendor has ever been w/!!! and he rlly rlly cares abt toby and feels super comfy w/ him

- splendor is v insecure abt being u know an eldrich creature so toby always compliments his 'monster' traits and splendor goes "!!!! O W O!!!!"

- toby uses splendor's tendril bells to stim sometimes and splendor happily let's him

- romeos human form has a ton of fucking freckles and when he goes into his human form toby goes fucking BONKERS he LOVES IT

- splendor in his human form: a-aha toby are you ready to go out,,,,,

toby, paniking: WHO ARE YOU AND WHAT DID YOU DO TO SPLENDOR

splendor: AAAAAAAAAA

- toby slips up and calls splendor Romeo in front of slender and slenders like

"who...who are you referring to?"

"SPLENDOR I MEAN YOUR BROTHER SIR"

"how the fuck do you know his human name"

"uhm"

- jeff: how do you feel about your emplyoee fucking your brother lmao

slender: please

slender: leave my office. please. im begging you jeffery just fucking go

(THEY DON'T ACTUALLY FUCK PLEASE)

- this situation makes slender say fuck a lot lmao

- toby likes sitting on splendor a lot n its just he's on his ds yelling at his NintendoDog to sit down as splendor reads nariana and toby's just background noise screeching "MR. SNIFFLES SIT!!!!"

[iwritesometimes]

thank you to the gorgeous @wordssometimesfail for tagging me in a get to know you thing RIGHT when I most needed some procrastination material!

Nickname: i don't have one that people outside my family use. my folks call me "sis" or "sissy" cause it's how my little sister's always referred to me.

Zodiac: your friendly neighborhood textbook capricorn.

Height: some nebulous area between 5' and 5'1". *fistbumps Aaliya* we were too powerful. god had to nerf us.

Amount of sleep: for optimal sarah maintenance, 7 hrs a night, but I can function okay on five and sometimes push it further bc i am not well adjusted.

Last movie i saw: watched the first installment of Lonesome Dove with @northstarfan last week, and my baby boy got et by water moccasins, so that went well.

Last thing i googled: "symphony of the night voice actors" looking for the name of Alucard's VA, bc the wiki unhelpfully just lists Yuri Lowenthal as Alucard's voice and i knew that couldn't be right. this gleaned me one of my favorite things: a series VA comparison collection, which has given me my favorite and now forever canon Alucard incarnation.

Favourite musician: it's been the band Keane for a long time, and it probably still is, but lately i have been reminded just how insanely good nickel creek are, so as keane is on indefinite hiatus/probably never making another album at this point, they're a top contender too.

Song stuck in my head: "bloody tears" bc it's been lodged in there for about two weeks straight and is the only song that matters to me anymore. but liberally seasoned with "simon's theme" and "vampire killer."

Do i get asks: sometimes! i always crave more. please PLEASE come scream at me about anything in which we're mutually interested!!

Blogs following: is this blogs i'm following, or blogs following me? it's 200 and 809, respectively, though only maybe a quarter of those following are real people.

What im wearing: a-line skirt with a tiny black and white herringbone print and black piping, and a royal blue peasant top w/ 3/4 sleeves and a big swirly white embroidered floral pattern on the front. and my Magical Talisman Bracelets. :)

Dream trip: i mean. everywhere. i wanna go so many places i'll never be brave or partnered enough to go to. at the moment i'm dreamily "planning" a road trip through northern california and the pacific northwest to see the redwood forest, the pacific coast, Seattle, etc. i also want desperately to visit Iceland and drive the ring road.

Dream job: not really sure anymore. i'm really comfortable as a copy editor, with a good salary doing a job i'm good at on a team i like, and when i'm off the clock i get to forget about my job completely and do whatever the hell i like with my free time. i think at this point all of those things are more important to me than having The Best Job Ever.

Favourite food: macaroni and cheese, hands down.

Languages: just English, shamefully. i really wanna pick Spanish and German back up, though...and lately i've been reminded what a fun language Romanian is.

Play any instruments: "played" cello for a school year, actually played flute for about seven. gonna try to pick it back up. i also own a guitar and want to learn.

Favourite song: it's been "crystal ball" by Keane for years, but "sovereign light cafe" and "won't be broken" are awesome too. i also love, in no order except that in which my dumb brain remembers them: "rest of my life," "why should the fire die," and "love of mine" by nickel creek; "the mighty rio grande" by this will destroy you; "on the nature of daylight" by max richter; "to build a home" by the cinematic orchestra; "magnificat" by arvo pärt; "i thank you god for most this amazing day" by eric whitacre; "welcome home" by coheed and cambria; "televators" by the mars volta; "übers ende der welt" by tokio hotel; "geht ab," "grau," "perfekt," and "bevor du gehst" by panik; "sarajevo" and "majka ruži kćer" by dino merlin (actually the whole Burek album); "heroes of earth" by wang leehom; "mirror", "vanilla", "returner," and "orenji no taiyou" by gackt (+ hyde on that last one; actually the whole Mars album); "ue o muite arukō" by kyu sakamoto; "to zanarkand" by nobuo uematsu; "somewhere i belong", "the radiance," "breaking the habit," and "the messenger" by linkin park (really both Meteora and A Thousand Suns albums); "o nata lux" by morten lauridsen; "the book of love" by peter gabriel covering the magnetic fields; "castle in the mist" by michiru oshima and koichi yamazaki; "lover's cross" by jim croce; "the mountain wayfarers" by the woodsheep; and like a thousand others. but when it comes right down to it, i think my actual bulletproof favorite song of all time might just be the king's singers covering airwaves' "you are the new day," aka, the greatest love song of all time.

Random fact:  i'm double jointed in both thumbs! this has not garnered me any edge in video games, which i consider a gross oversight on the part of the universe.

okay this took me like three whole days to finish and i would link all that music but i think i'll do that in another post in the interest of finally finishing this one. so i tag @bebeocho @omicheese @lazaefair @poemsingreenink @syphrilfox @filigods @look-and-wonder @northstarfan @pixelhanzo (obv only if you want to!) and LITERALLY anybody else who's feelin chatty, tag me if you do so i can come spy on ur life!!