#but then emry wrote something pretty and forced my hand

[astridsbirdskulls]

I love starry gay ppl✨️

[rayshippouuchiha]

Merthur drabble

So this is the first time I’ve written something since I wrote a Gary Stue x Mary Sue kind of fic at age 11, so don’t judge it too hard ok?😅Also, it’s more a collection of ideas that spawned from the first one than a drabble, since I didn’t want to expand too much on it. Do tell me what you think please 😊

The idea was born over me wondering “since Merlin is immortal, even from physical wounds and poison, what would’ve happened if his magic was discovered by Uther and he’s taken to the pyre?”. Bonus points if you catch the reference to an episode in the later seasons of the show that I sneaked in there. This would take place right before Morgana goes to the druids the first time (meaning she is still mostly loyal to Uther, Arthur and Camelot). Maybe Myror doesn’t try to kill Arthur during the tournament but instead disguises himself as a servant and tries to do it when he finds himself alone with Arthur in a corridor, with Merlin coming from around the corner just in time to catch him.

Merlin is too far away and the knife was thrown from such close range that he can’t save Arthur subtly as usual, and is forced to conjure a magical barrier between Arthur and the assassin instead, while still in Arthur’s field of vision. Using the assassin’s moment of shock against him, Arthur is able to kill him but is then consumed by the feeling of betrayal and rage. He does what he always does when he wishes to see someone punished: he takes Merlin to Uther, initially expecting him to be merely banished from the kingdom on account of having used magic to save his life. Pretty soon, he realizes that Uther does not care in the slightest what the magic was used for, only that it existed, when he declares that Merlin will suffer the ultimate punishment for his treason: the pyre.

Arthur ardently tries to protest, of course he does, but it is already too late. There is no going back, and due to his strong feelings on the matter Uther confines him to his rooms, watched by half a dozen guards, so that he would be unable to help Merlin escape. He also decrees that he cares too much about a mere servant, and to teach him a lesson he will be forced to witness the execution himself

Merlin is taken to the dungeons, bound in cold iron shackles (or something similar), unable to access his magic to free himself, and is visited by Morgana.

She starts cursing out Arthur for his part in his fate, but he begs her to forgive him. “He’s an idiot”, he says, “but he didn’t mean for this to happen. He just thought that I had been lying to him all along, and he wanted me banished for it so he acted impulsively. We both know that if he had taken a moment to think he would have sent me away himself then changed his mind in a few days after speaking to you and Gaius. You didn’t see his face when Uther declared I was going to the pyre. Please don’t blame him”

Morgana then tries to tell him that she will get him out somehow, but he convinces her otherwise, since she already attempted to allow Tom to escape recently, and thus would be the main suspect. And besides, he is being too closely guarded for any escape attempt to succeed without the use of magic.

He explains that he knows she has magic, and begs her forgiveness for not helping her sooner. He suggests that she make up a reason for going on trips occasionally, and use that time to ask the Druids living nearby to teach her to control her powers. Finally, he grabs her hand, smiles sadly and says:

“You are the kindest, fairest lady I have ever known. Don’t let your fear and anger make you lose sight of that. I am honored to have called you my friend. And remember, never lose hope, because at the very least I will make sure my death reminds Arthur that magic is not always used for evil. He will change things once he is king, I know it. So have faith, milady. And protect that cabbagehead for me once I’m gone, will you? He gets into so much trouble, he’s gonna need someone at his back”

Morgana loses her composure and begins to cry, releasing heaving sobs while Merlin tries to comfort her. He tells her that it will be alright, and to stay with Gaius and Gwen the next day. He does not wish for them to see him die this way.

The next morning at dawn, he is taken before the stake where his “crimes” are read out loud. He is then tied to the stake and allowed to speak his last words. Merlin draws himself up as much as he can, and declares in a loud voice that he didn’t choose to learn magic, and was instead born with it, and in all his years he has never once used his abilities for evil. He proudly proclaims that he has only ever used his magic in service of Camelot and his lord, Prince Arthur. He killed the afanc and thus ended the plague upon the kingdom. He enchanted the blade that defeated the griffin. He defended Arthur from bandits and assassins from the shadows. He discovered the treachery of the sorcerer Edwin then used his own magic to reverse the spell that would have killed Uther. He killed the Sidhe Sophia and Aulfric before they could sacrifice Arthur’s life to return to Avalon. He took part in the forging of the blade that ultimately felled the wraith of Tristan de Bois. He convinced Anhora, guardian of the unicorns, to give Arthur another chance when he first failed his trials. He saved Arthur from the bite of the Questing Beast by offering his own life in return, then struck down the sorceress Nimueh when she attempted to take the life of an innocent person instead. He defeated the dark sorcerer Cornelius Sigan and his magical army, then sealed his soul away once more.

Once finished listing his deeds, he looks Arthur directly in the eye and says with a tremulous smile “Arthur may think of me as an underachiever but I’m quite proud of those accomplishments. I… I can die happy”

Incensed, Uther gives the order to light the pyre while a heartbroken Arthur is forced to watch, held back by two guards as he desperately tries to run over and free Merlin from his bonds. The fire ignites, and Merlin can’t help but scream. Arthur closes his eyes. Next to him, Leon turns away.

One hour passes. Then three. Then six. And yet, Merlin’s screams still ring out over the crowd. Many people, initially eager to witness the execution, now thoroughly regret coming. The screams, they reverberate in their minds, and those with family members around his age feel sick to their stomachs. No one in the world, not even the most heinous of criminals, deserves such a brutal, horrendous pain, and if his words before the pyre was lit are to be believed Merlin deserves this least of all. No one can understand. There is no wind to blow away the flames, no rain, and Merlin is clearly burning, yet he just won’t die.

Looking closely, it is apparent that something strange is afoot. Merlin has burns all over his body, his skin is red or blistered or charred black by turns. In some places, one can even see the white of his bone peek through his wounds. However, after a few seconds, the blackened skin seems to heal and turns pink once more, only to burn again.

Uther orders several of the guards to move forward, and use spears to end Merlin’s misery. They stab him in the gut, and Merlin’s blood dies the ground crimson. After a few minutes, Merlin’s screams cease and a sigh of relief sweeps through everyone present.

…

But it is not over. Soon, Merlin’s shrieks start anew, and one knight slits his throat in desperation. But to no avail. Suddenly, as the wound at his throat heals itself, Merlin’s cries restart. But they have changed. The ground shakes, and the sky turns black from countless dark clouds suddenly converging over Camelot as he loses control of his magic. And over the cacophony of noise from the thunder and the rumbling of the earth and the screams of the frightened public, Merlin can be heard…. Begging someone to please, please kill him.

Arthur weeps helplessly in the grasp of the guards. Uther is flabbergasted. He doesn’t understand what is going on, and thus is forced to call his resident magic expert to the scene. Gaius has to be dragged kicking and screaming before him, tears running down his face.

“What is it you want, your majesty? Isn’t it enough that you are killing the closest thing to a son to me, for the crime of saving your son’s life? Do I have to watch it happen as well?”

Uther forgives his insolence, just this once, and instead asks why it is taking Merlin so long to die. Gaius almost can’t believe what is happening, but ultimately explains that Merlin is called Emrys the Immortal by the druids, who say he is magic itself. He never believed this literally, having only thought they meant he is a being of unfathomable magical power, but it is now apparent that their words are nothing but the truth. Merlin can’t be killed, and continuing with this atrocity is only meaningless torture.

Uther agrees, and has Merlin taken into the castle. Arthur immediately frees himself from the stunned guards and goes after him, only to find him in the corner of one of the cells with his wounds slowly healing by themselves, crying silently while occasionally letting out heartbreaking whimpers. He is staring at the wall blankly, and doesn’t react at all when Arthur speaks to him. His mind wasn’t able to withstand the excruciatingly torturous experience, and has shattered.

Eventually, Arthur convinces Uther to allow him to keep Merlin with him, since he is clearly not a threat to anyone. After a while, Merlin stops making any sound and will only look ahead, unseeingly, only capable of following orders, completely unable to do anything by himself. Wracked with guilt, Arthur then does his best to take care of Merlin with the help of Morgana, Gwen and Gaius; feeding him, bathing him, dressing him, and comforting him when he wakes from night terrors in the middle of the night. Looking after someone who is essentially disabled eventually takes a toll on Gwen and Arthur’s relationship, and they agree they are better off as friends.

At some point, Arthur is attacked again and Merlin instinctively protects him with magic: this is the first action he has taken by himself since the pyre. Arthur breaks down into sobs, hugging Merlin close and begging him to say something, ANYTHING. Merlin doesn’t answer.

It takes many months, perhaps even years, but eventually with Arthur’s loving care Merlin does get better. His very first word after his ordeal is “Arthur”.

Arthur is so overwhelmingly relieved the first time Merlin makes a sassy comeback again that he falls to his knees in the middle of a council meeting. A panicked Merlin helps him to his feet, and Arthur uses his arm to pull him into a backbreaking hug. Merlin becomes Arthur’s most trusted advisor, and there is no threat they don’t face together.

In the meantime, his words before the pyre and the way he continues to protect Arthur, even in his current state, move the hearts of the people and obviously Arthur himself. Eventually, the protests in favor of repealing the ban on magic get so ridiculous, with so many people behind them, that even Uther has to concede defeat. Forced to face the truth about the nature of magic users and the reality of his actions against them, Uther health deteriorates from the stress and he confesses his mistakes to Arthur and Morgana, particularly in regards to what happened with Ygraine and Vivienne. It is a long time before either of them will speak to him again after that, and it takes almost until he is on his death bed. When he takes his very last breath, their forgiveness feels like absolution.

Morgana takes Merlin’s words to her that night to heart, and settles for being named an official princess once Arthur is king, and being given her very own stretch of land to lord over. She still spends much of her time in the castle, and once Merlin is back to his old self somewhat, she visits him often to practice magic, dote on Aithusa and share gossip. She eventually makes Morgause come around and she becomes Morgana’s most fearsome guard and protector. She is also given a place in court by Arthur.

Arthur names Merlin Court Sorcerer, and eventually their devotion for each other blossoms into a love so passionate, so fiercely protective on both parts that no one dares speak out against it. Gwen agrees to be their surrogate to create heirs to the throne, with loving support from her husband Lancelot. He and the other Knights of the Round Table accept Merlin as one of their own, and are almost as protective of him as their king. Soon, Uther’s supporters, magic haters and dissenters stop appearing.

With the entirety of Albion behind them, Merlin and Arthur bind their lives together in what is later called the wedding of the millennium.

As prophecy stated, together Merlin and Arthur usher in an era of peace the likes of which the world had never known, for both magical and non magical people. Once Arthur decides to retire, he leaves the kingdom in the capable hands of their first born, and then they leave to explore the world. They come back from time to time, of course, to check in, to share their wisdom, and they defend Albion with everything they have when called, but for the most part they just travel and revel in each other’s presence.

As their legend spreads throughout the world, people will sometime claim to have seen them in one place or another. Sometimes it’s true, sometimes it isn’t. And when Albion’s greatest time of need comes, they are there to face it. Together.

[idiosyncrasy-at-its-finest]

Daydream induced piece of writing pt. 2

An AN I feel is necessary to include even though it most certainly isn’t.  Because this was based off a daydream which wasn’t fully thought out, I’ve taken creative liberty (to my own idea?!) when writing to fill in gaps and... I’ve just been letting my mind take me wherever it pleases and– wow, I’m not sure how I feel about the direction this is taking.  Because I don’t want to bore you before I get a chance to gain new readers (!), I’ll add more to the AN at the end, but there is a lot going through my mind right now!  It’s currently almost 2:00 am, I have not made revisions, and I copied + pasted from google docs so italics aren’t a thing... but I hope you enjoy!  (I’ll come back to update whenever I make edits on my doc!)

I’ve done this before, is my first thought as I plummet for what seems like an eternity.  The wind pushes my hair in all directions but there’s only him.  All around me.  His smell overwhelms me, the night air forcing me to inhale his scent.  His face is beside mine, his smile in the crook between my neck and shoulder.  His arms are around me, my legs wrapped around him.  Our very souls are touching and combining and–

“You remember.”

“I do.”  I pause.  “Why didn’t I?”

“Something about me being too perfect, too otherworldly for your feeble mind to accept and understand.”  He’s laughing now and it’s the most beautiful sound I’ve ever heard.  It’s a sound I’ve heard a thousand times before, in a thousand different lifetimes, and a thousand different worlds.

“You only remember me when we’re together.”  He pulls away from me and twirls me lightly.  “A shame for me.  I remember you always.”  Something in his voice– maybe it’s the way his voice tightens, maybe it’s the way his usual easy grin looks anything but that– tells me that I’m all he has.

I snap out of my him-induced trance and suddenly realize we’re not falling.  Together, we’re climbing the night sky, flying higher and higher.

“Your favorite thing, if I remember correctly.”  I only nod, my throat suddenly feeling dry.  “‘Dancing on the clouds surrounded only by the moon and stars’.”  I nod again and pull myself closer to him.  He laughs again.  And then he’s throwing his head back, staring at the heavens until he’s laughing so hard the corners of his lips are forcing his eyes to retreat and they shut close behind silvery eyelids and long, pale eyelashes.  I feel a bubbling rise, beginning in the pit of my stomach and traveling upward.  A single noise of glee escapes my throat and he pauses.  His chest is still shaking, low chuckles providing a tickling sensation where he’s pressed against me, but he’s looking at me now.  Studying me.  “That sound.  My favorite thing.”

Heat rises in my cheeks and he’s laughing again.  “Man, I forget how easy it is to make you blush.”  I want to hit him, but he grabs my wrist and keeps it by his side– as if he knew what I was planning.  He probably did.  “You know,” his voice is casual, but there’s a forced quality to it, “you’re the only one who makes me feel like…” he trails off.

“Like what?”

“Like I can be more than I think I am.”  And then I remember.

“Oh… oh, Emrys.”  His eyes brighten, but just as quickly they dull.

“Yeah… that’s me.”  He chuckles wryly and his eyes scan the sky.  He clears his throat and– “Cygnus.”

“What?”

“The constellation–”

“I know– I’m not stupid–”

“Debatable.”  I slap his arm and it’s like hitting a slab of marble.  I try not to let the hurt show.  He grabs my hand gently and continues to speak, wrapping his cold hands around my too warm ones, pretending like he’s not at all.  “No, I… it was your favorite constellation.  When we first met, at least.”  He stumbles over his words, but there’s a certain cadence to his voice and a certain pulling at the edge of my mind which sings that he’s explained this before.

“It’s my favorite constellation too.”  He grimaces and I have to ask: “What?”

“You… you speak like you’re different people.”

“Aren’t I?”

“N-no,” his grip on me loosens and I let out a squeak before he readjusts while mumbling a low, “sorry.”  I know he was going to run his hands through his hair.  His hair that’s so black that it hurts to look at for too long.  Staring into it is like staring into nothing; it’s pure black– completely devoid of any hint of anything.

“You’re the same person,” he insists.  His eyes are imploring, as if he’s trying to unlock my past with a single look.  A look I’ve seen too many times before.

“I’m sorry… I barely remember our experiences from my past lives and–”

“But we’ve met in this life too.  Two hundred and eighty-seven times now.”  He pulls me closer to him and averts his gaze.  “I started visiting you when I felt it wasn’t so… predatory… you know… age differences and whatnot.”

We both laugh weakly, but my heart aches for him.  “I can’t imagine what it’s like…” his grip on me tightens.  “I’m sorry.  You didn’t– you don’t have to wait for me, you know.  You’re quite the handsome… being,” he laughs and I smile in accordance, “you could get all the girls you want.”

“I could.”  He’s looking at me again.  “But they wouldn’t be you.”  My heart’s hammering in my chest and he’s smirking that devilish smirk again and I just know that he can feel my heart racing from where our chests touch one anothers’, I just know he’s going to make some dumb remark about how much he affects me, and I just know he’s going to try and–

“Hold on tight, Amber.”

And then we’re falling again.  Just as we have a thousand times before.

_______________________________________________________________________

AN again :) so originally, I’d been leaning out my room, propped up on the tiny ledge and leaning against the glass of my window.  I had my earbuds in and let myself get lost in my thoughts.  First, it was a boy who definitely could not belong to our world who would jump down from my roof and take me on a journey through the skies– something in my make believe world I’d done a thousand times before.  He was an escape from the mundane.  We shared banter, we teased one another, he was fun and full of life despite... well, technicalities– my daydream wasn’t the most specific.  There was nothing romantic about it, there was no soulmate-thing going on, and there was no memory loss of any kind.

While writing, though, it seemed more exciting to read to have this seem like a new experience for my character, so I wrote it exactly that way.  Trying to stay true to my original idea, I added that she’d done this previously and then... for continuity’s sake, for her to have done this before but still be very confused and not know what’s going on... memory loss!  Or... whatever it is my character has.  And I could’ve just said something like “no matter how many times we’d done this before, I was always...” something about “a new, and surreal experience” or something... but I didn’t and it’s too late to go back because now I’m attached >:(  But I like it!  I wasn’t trying to go for romance, and so I feel like it shows in my writing that I’m trying to ‘push them apart’ almost, but uhh... consider it a slowburn?  Or not slow, because I’m still only writing in accordance to my daydream so it’s going to end when she goes back into her room.

I forgot to add that she was listening to music in the beginning (now I don’t want to), but originally it would’ve ended with her listening right where the song left off and it seeming like no time had passed– the only clue being that it was darker outside.

WOW that was long!  I just wanted to get all my thoughts out– maybe closure?  Because I was so attached– still am– to the idea of there 1) not being romance 2) um... that’s it!  I’m not attached to idea that she remembers, but at this point I have no idea where I’m going with the whole ‘her not remembering’ and if I end this mini-series with her not remembering him as soon as he drops her back off, I will... be upset with myself.  But there’s also some sort of tragic beauty to it...

Were these spoilers?  I’m pretty sure there weren’t any (?), besides the ending maybe but... I’m still figuring it out.  Actually, that’s a lie.  I’ll figure it out when I write it!  It’s 2:10 now.  I spent far too long on this AN.  If you read it through, hooray!  Here’s a glimpse of the promised idiosyncrasy as is in my username!  Hope you are staying happy and safe (mentally + physically! and... biologically?  internally?  wellness-wise!)!