#but then again all the new batkids r here so

[shoot-i-messed-up]

Ahhh so this is pre-Parallax Hal. Gotcha.

[missbluesunflowersstuff]

Some Dick Grayson headcanon

I did some headcanon based in canon stuff and also random things, this is more around the batkids and Dick . Please respect

All batkids lie to Batman, ALL.OF.THEM and Dick is the one who lie to Batman and the others Robins (he is the oldest child guys, he will use his power for evil for fun)

He worries about Jason a lot and Dick will be happy in listen if Jason needs to talk

He also worries about Damian but for a different reason, and he still has Damian's adoption papers stored in his house (he mentions about wanting to adopt Damian in Nightwing 11)

Dick bond with Tim is pretty strong

He's Clark's favorite Robin and he knows it (Clark can deny it all he wants, but everyone knows it's Dick)

He accepted very well the fact that Damian changed the color of his uniform and turned the R into Redemption (he forgot to tell the boy what Robin was, but now Dick doesn't think it's right for a grown man to throw his moral responsibility onto a child then he is pretty ok with it )

Dick hates very single Bruce's former romantic partners, especially Khoa (Ghostmaker)

When Dick is tired of his siblings shit, he just needs to shout out "Superman" and less than 20min one of them will show up and pick up his brothers

Is Tim doing something potentially dangerous to himself? Here comes Kon carrying Tim like a sack of potatoes in one arm and Bart in another. Is Steph doing something also potentially dangerous to herself? Kara is on her way. Is Damian missing (again)? just one yell is enough and Jon will be landing on the ground while carrying Damian in his arms like a bride

There is this time that Dick ask Krypto (yep, the dog) to pick up the Robin, Dick's smile got bigger and bigger as the dog approached carrying Robin the mouth as if the boy were a puppy. After that, Damian never went two months without giving news about himself to Dick

Dick and Alfred always get the best gifts in the whole house

Dick is the best at reading people, this is not just a matter of body language, but actually understanding the situation and the person themselves. The more time this boy spends with someone, the better he will be able to understand them to the point of seeing transparency even in Bruce's actions

When he was little, during his circus days, he dreamed of being the ringmaster. Nowadays he is so good at reading the room and pulling strings for his own gain that he basically has made his dreams come true

He taught each of his brothers a different circus trick

Everyone blames Bruce for Damian's addiction to adopting pets, the truth is that Bruce just gave the dog, Dick allow Damian keep the cow and Dick encourages the adoption of his little brother's animals just to annoy Bruce and for everyone to blame Bruce even more

If you ask Batman who is the wost Robin, Bruce will say without hesitation that it's Dick and no one will believe in Bruce

Robin!Dick was a very energetic child, he made a lot of jokes and came from the circus and Bruce was a first-time father, so Dick was able to escape from Bruce and the mansion easily

Nowadays the only Robin who can escape Bruce's obsessive surveillance is Damian (who is a fucking ninja)

"You like the boy as if he were your son because he is a menace like you" - Jason Todd

No one believes in Bruce and Jason when they talk how difficult Dick was in the past (Babs, Kor'i, Wally and Roy can proof but they're in Dick side)

Dick knows many languages, but he really dedicated himself to learning Chinese after Cass was added to the family

The same applies for Arabic

He is actually pretty ok in hide on body if one of his siblings ask

knowing many languages can sometimes become a problem, he may forget a word in English and only remember it in a second or third language

"What is the name of that white liquid that can be ingested?"

and some hours later "MILK! The word was MILK!!!"

Dick always tries to spend quality time with all his siblings and checks in on them regularly (Cass and Damian are the most difficult since they don't use social media much)

Dick and Babs currently knows about Jason fanfiction account, they also reads the fics and leaves comments (Jason will never know it)

He also knows about Damian's fanart account, but will never tell the boy that (if you think Bruce and Tim are terrible you've definitely never read anything about Dick Grayson and its show)

His relationship with Bruce is complicated, to the point that they only interact after Damian's arrival. Dick still tries to understand Bruce, but he keeps the bar low

Never touch him without permission

He became a police officer to try to combat corruption, he gave up the profession due to corruptio, and as being Nightwing allows him to attack the corrupt he will be the hero to keep punch corrupt in their face (I really don't get why in hell he becomes a cop)

Jim Gordon hates him

Dick might get exhausted from all the work, vigilantism, his siblings, and Bruce's weekly batshit, and when that happens he just lays on the floor while Haley the dog plays around him (and sometimes one of his siblings join them, usually Cass or Damian)

"Richard what do you want for Christmas?" - Damian asked one time and Dick in full low maintenance mood "A break"

that Christmas Damian gave Dick a brick, apparently the boy confused the words and didn't understand why Dick started laughing when he received the gift, but Damian was very happy to know that his older brother loved the gift to the point of laughing until his belly hurt

and now every time Dick get exhausted he just sit with Haley the Dog and look at the brick and start laugh (yep, he keeps the brick)

Some batkid headcanon: Damian || Duke || Cassandra || Stephanie || Tim || Jason || Dick

[mischiefandspirits]

Exploration

Sequel to Odd One Out

Alternate title: Five times the batkids' teammates didn't realize they have powers and one time their family already knew?

At the request of etherealizt on AO3

One ~ Oracle

Barbara sighed as she sunk further into the water, blowing a few bubbles away from her nose.

She was having a night of rest and relaxation. She’d told the Birds she was taking the night off and had threatened all the other bats with eternal rickrolling if any of them interrupted. The soft music Dinah had recommended was playing from her phone’s speakers on the counter and the lights were dimmed. She was trying out the strawberry and grapefruit bubble bar Carrie had made and had finally opened the rosé Bruce had gifted her when she’d moved into the Clock Tower. An Alfred-made meal was warming in the oven, courtesy of Jason paying her back a favor. After her bath, she’d eat dinner then watch some of the movies on Dick’s Babs Needs to See This!!!! playlist before heading to bed early.

It was meant to be a nice quiet night.

Which meant that whoever had decided to call her not ten minutes after she had lowered herself into the water and gotten comfortable was going to have some very annoying problems with their technology for the next week.

She gave the phone a good long glare before laying her head back and closing her eyes.

“This better be good,” she growled once she’d connected to her cell and answered the call on speakerphone.

“I know, I know, I’m so sorry,” Mari said quickly. “It’s just… we went on this mission -- just a quick in and out thing, or it was supposed to be -- and we thought we wouldn’t need your help, but we kind of do and now it’s too late to back out.”

Barbara sighed. “I was taking a bath.”

About five thousand miles away, Vixen flinched and looked at her fellow Birds. She mouthed, She’s taking a bath.

Canary flinched as well while Katana and Huntress shared a look and Question shifted guiltily. All five women had stayed at the Clock Tower before so they knew how Oracle preferred to take showers because of how arduous it was for her to get into the bath, even with the bath lift.

The times she actually got to take a bath were to be treasured.

“Shoot, I mean, we’ll handle it.”

“I’d hope you wouldn’t have called me if you could handle it,” Oracle joked.

“No. I mean, yeah, we didn’t interrupt your night lightly, but we’ll figure something out. We don’t want to ruin your b-”

“It’s fine. I’m already logging into my system. What are we looking at?”

She’s already logging in? But that means... Vixen slumped back against the wall she’d been standing in front of as she realized Oracle must have started getting out before she’d even picked up the phone. They’d ruined her night the moment Vixen had pressed call. Well, no reason to waste even more of her night.

The mission went fast with Oracle’s help and the team was out in just under half an hour. They all gave their thanks and apologized again for interrupting her night, but she waved it away before signing off.

“I still feel bad about ruining her bath. Maybe we should get her something to make up for it,” Dinah said as they were on their way home.

“Maybe we didn’t. She got on pretty quickly. She might have just had a tablet near the bath,” Helena suggested.

Renee shook her head. “She had too many things going at once. She couldn’t have managed it all with just one device.”

Tatsu smirked and chuckled, “Even the great Oracle could not handle such limitations. We'll all chip in to show our thanks.”

Back in Gotham, Barbara sunk a little further into the water with a pleased moan.

While it was a headache to manage an entire mission remotely, it was worth it to remain wrapped in the warm water and fruity scents. Thankfully it was just a short one this time, but maybe next time she’ll ask Tim to cover her in case of another emergency.

She started the music on her phone again then reached out to dry off her hand so she could finally grab her wine and start her night of relaxation.

Two ~ Nightwing

Green Arrow frowned as he watched the goon in the interview room. He, Batman, Hawkwoman, Flash, and Cyborg had picked the guy up the day before while trying to locate an experimental power core that had been stolen from S.T.A.R. Labs. They’d tracked the core to a shipping yard, but lost it there. Most of the yard’s crew were clean, but the manager was clearly on the take and knew something.

The only problem was that he wouldn’t talk.

They’d tried intimidation, logic, bribery, and charisma, but nothing had worked. Since Wonder Woman and Martian Manhunter were off-world and Zatanna was unreachable (something about alternate dimensions and a tiefling warlock’s pet eldritch book-dogs), that meant the lasso of truth, mind reading, and truth spells were out.

“There has to be some way we can get him to talk,” Vic said from where he was sitting on the floor next to Wally.

“I could get him to talk,” Shayera muttered, thumbing one of the spikes on her mace.

“No,” Bruce objected as he walked up.

“We’re running out of time.”

“I know, which is why I called for help.”

“Help?” Oliver asked.

“Me.”

Shayera and Oliver jumped and spun around to see Nightwing standing behind them, a wide impish grin on his face.

Fricking ninja bats!

“Oh heck yes!” Wally cheered before bending over in a coughing fit as he choked on the bite of sandwich that had been in his mouth, Vic patting his back.

Dick winked at his friends and looked through the two-way mirror. “Double-R filled me in. This is the guy giving you trouble?”

Bruce grunted.

“I think I’ll be able to take him,” Dick said, walking over to lean against his father. “I’m going to need to borrow Robin for a few days after this, though.”

Oliver swore he could see Bruce’s eyebrow raise beneath the cowl. “For a mission or fun?”

“I need someone small to help with an infiltration… and Jump Wildlife Park has a new Snakes of the Outback exhibit.”

Sighing, Bruce shook his head. “Robin’s benched for the next week, as I’m sure you know. He’s not getting out of it. You can take Catgirl if Catwoman doesn’t need her. I’ll allow a trip to the zoo, however.”

“I’ll take it.” Dick shot him finger guns as he backed towards the door. He then spun around on his heel, high-fived the now standing Wally and Vic, and skipped into the interrogation room. He dropped into the chair across the table from the goon, leaning it back so he could rest his feet on the table. “Hi, there, I’m Nightwing.”

The goon glared at him.

“No introductions then, alright. I’ll make this quick since I’m sure you want to get out of here and I’m currently in a game of hide-and-seek with some of the other bats and I’m not about to lose because B’s having an off day. You tell me what I want to know and I won't have to make you.”

The goon snorted. “Am I really supposed to be scared by that?”

Dick shrugged. “If I wanted to scare you I’d break your fingers. We can try that if you want.”

“The winged chick already offered and it didn’t scare me then either.” The man looked Nightwing over then gave a grin that Oliver was sure set off Batman’s dad mode, even if the man hadn’t responded in any visible way. “You’re welcome to try, though. At least you’re prettier than that bitch.”

Oliver grabbed Shayera’s shoulder when she stepped forward and Vic placed himself between her and the door without looking away from the mirror.

Dick hummed then dropped his legs. The chair fell back onto all fours and he followed the motion so he was leaning against the table, elbows on top with his hand clasped together to create a V that his chin rested on. “You think I’m pretty?”

Oliver blinked and focused his attention on Dick. His voice sounded… different. He couldn’t put his finger on what it was. It just sounded… nice.

Distantly, he was aware there was another voice talking as well.

What was it about Dick’s voice?

Suddenly Dick was standing up and patting the goon on the shoulder. “Thanks, you’ve been a big help.”

The goon nodded, blinking up at Dick in a daze.

Dick skipped back out of the room. “You got everything you need then?”

Did they? Crud, Oliver had zoned out of the entire interrogation. Bats was definitely going to tear him a new one.

Bruce grunted and Dick smiled. “You’re welcome. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to get lost before Batgirl bribes my location out of Double-R.”

And with that, the younger Bat was booking it down the hall.

“I’m going to write up a report on the interrogation. Review the footage and meet up in conference hall F so we can plan our next move,” Bruce said before marching off.

There was a moment of silence then Shayera asked, “What the hell was that?”

Vic rolled his eyes and Wally nodded, “It’s always a little distracting, we know.”

“Speak for yourself,” Vic snorted, elbowing the speedster. “The Titans call it Wing’s Milk and Honey voice. He barely ever uses it, but when he does, he always manages to get the information we need out of whoever we’re interrogating. It’s freaky.”

“It’s awesome. Just wish he’d talk to me in that voice.”

Vic glared at Wally. “I did not need to hear that.”

The speedster snickered.

“Did any of you catch what the goon in there actually said?” Oliver asked reluctantly and was relieved when both Shayera and Wally shook their heads.

Vic made a so-so motion. “I know he said he was working for Luthor and the core got moved to a warehouse just outside Metropolis, but the rest kind of got lost. Dick’s…”

“Distracting?” Wally suggested and Vic elbowed him again.

“Just listen to the recording. It gets easier the more you hear it. Kind of,” Vic suggested.

“Standard Milk and Honey protocol,” Wally said with a nod. “Dick’s just too charismatic for his own good.”

Before anything else could be said, Dick’s affronted yelp came echoing down the hall.

“At least when it’s not one of his siblings.”

Three ~ Red Robin and Batgirl

The Young Justice team had just gotten back from a mission. Bart, Kon, Jaime, and Tim were all resting in the lounge. Artemis had retreated to her room while Cassie and Kara had had to head home. Stephanie had been hanging out with the boys, but had disappeared a few minutes in.

Kon was asleep on the couch with his head resting on Tim’s lap. Tim, meanwhile, was working on a report, his laptop on the couch’s arm so as not to disturb Kon. Jaime was sitting on the coffee table in front of them and playing a video game on the main screen. Bart was curled up in an armchair off to the side, working through his post-mission meal.

A cymbal-banging monkey toy sitting on the shelves behind Bart slid forward a little.

The speedster turned at the noise and blinked at the unfamiliar toy. He shrugged it off and turned back to his food.

The monkey slid a little closer.

Bart turned around and frowned at the toy. He stared at it for a moment then slowly turned back around.

A minute went by, then the toy slid noticeably closer.

Bart spun around, jumping out of his seat and pointing at the toy. “I knew it!”

Tim and Jaime both turned to him, but the Kryptonian-strength earplugs did their job and Kon didn’t wake.

“What are you yelling about?” Tim asked.

“The monkey, it’s moving!”

Both boys looked between the monkey and their friend.

“You’re crazy,” Jaime said, turning back to his game.

“It is!”

“Did you see it move?” Tim asked.

“Well, no, but it’s not in the same spot!”

“Your eyes are probably just playing tricks on you. Maybe your blood sugar’s low or something. You haven’t eaten much yet,” the vigilante suggested before going back to his report.

“Like you’re one to talk about not eating,” Bart muttered as he grabbed his chair and turned it to face the self. “It moved! I’ll prove it!”

Bart didn’t take his eyes off the monkey for the next five minutes, even as he continued to eat.

Then his shadow reached out and tapped him on the shoulder before quickly returning to its proper place on the back of the chair.

He looked up and scowled when he didn’t see anyone. He returned his focus to the shelf, only to find himself nose to nose with the monkey just as it started banging its cymbals.

Bart bolted from the room, screaming about calling someone to come deal with the possessed toy.

Jaime glanced up, then shook his head and resumed playing his game.

A few seconds later Stephanie walked in, her magic bracelet on her wrist, and high-fived Tim.

Four ~ Black Bat and Signal

“Hey, Halo. Don’t turn on the lights.”

Violet paused in the doorway of the pitch-black warehouse, hand on the light switch. “Signal?”

“BB and I are here too,” Lia called.

“Looker? Why are you three sitting around in the dark?” ey called as ey carefully tried to make eir way towards the group by sound and memory.

“Looker and Signal are playing poker. The lights are off so Signal can’t cheat with his vision,” Cass explained.

“And yet the kid’s still cheating,” Lia huffed.

“I am not!” Duke said in an offended voice.

“How are you guys reading the cards?” Violet asked as eir hands finally touched the card table ey hoped the three were using for eir game. “And who’s sitting where?”

A hand came from eir left and brushed against eir arm. “I’m here. BB is next to me and Sig’s across from her. There’s a free seat across from me if you want to sit with us until BL gets here. Also, we’re using cards with braille. I can see the pictures and Sig can read braille so we’re all good.”

“You can read braille?”

“Batman.”

“Yeah, okay, that makes sense.” Violet slipped around the table and reached around until eir hand found the chair. As ey sat down, ey asked, “Is Signal even old enough to play?”

“Does this look like a casino? Who cares? It’s not like I’m sneaking him alcohol or cigarettes or anything,” Lia scoffed.

“Nightwing let me try a sip of beer once. It was awful,” Duke said.

She snorted. “Big Bro probably gave you the shi-bad stuff to scare you off.”

“You know, I patrol Gotham. I’ve heard all the swears before.”

“I am not getting caught swearing in front of Batman’s baby, thanks.”

“Robin and Catgirl are both younger than me!”

“CG is the Cat’s baby and Rob’s an assassin lovechild. You are the Bat's baby.”

Suddenly the room flooded with light, earning hisses, groans, and curses from the quartet.

“Why are you four playing cards in the dark?” Jefferson asked and the four saw him walking up to the table once they’d blinked the stars out of their eyes.

Violet could also now see that Cass was leaning against Lia with one of her arms stretched over the table to hold hands with her brother. The two let go, however, at their leader’s approach and Cass sat up. All three were suited up like Violet, though Cass’s mask was sitting on the table.

“We were playing cards," Lia said. "The dark was supposed to keep the kid from cheating. It didn’t work.”

“Whatever you say,” Duke snorted, gathering up his winnings. He sorted through it, then gave half to Cass.

“Why does she get half?”

Duke shrugged and Cass smiled. “Family helps each other out.”

Lia looked confused while Violet nodded slowly.

Jefferson just sighed. “Right… Well, get this cleaned up then we can discuss tonight’s mission.”

Five ~ Robin and Catgirl

Jon smiled at Goliath as he stroked the dragon bat’s ear. “Who’s the bestest dragon bat? You are! Yes, you are!”

“Bestest is not a word, Kent. Don’t teach Goliath bad grammar,” Damian tutted from where he was brushing Alfred the Cat.

“Gee Damian! How come your dad lets you get so many cool pets?” Kathy asked from where she was laying on Bat-Cow’s back. “I mean, the cow, dog, and cat are normal, -”

“Normal for farm girls, at least,” Colin chirped from where he was scratching Titus’s belly.

“- but the dragon bat’s insane! And now you’ve got a tiger too! Is there anything your dad won’t let you have?”

“Tiger?” Jon, Colin, and Damian all asked and Kathy pointed off to the side where Maya was slowly approaching the Malayan tiger cub that was stretched out on a large pillow and watching the girl through half-lidded eyes.

“That’s Kelley,” Damian said blankly.

“Aw, you named her after your sister?” Jon said, grinning widely at his best friend.

His best friend scowled at him in return. “She is not my sister.”

“I mean, your dad married her mom. That kind of makes her your sister,” Colin shot back and the scowl was turned on him.

“Does she accept pets or am I about to get my arm ripped off?” Maya asked softly as she sidestepped a little closer to the tiger in a crouch.

“Why would you wait this long to ask?” Kathy huffed.

“Kelley couldn’t rip your arm off if she wanted to,” Damian scoffed and turned back to his brushing.

Like she could understand him, the tiger’s head whipped towards him and she bared her teeth. With a low growl, she shifted onto her feet. Alfred realized what was happening as the tiger started bounding towards the bird-themed vigilante and jumped off Damian’s lap just before he was crushed under a juvenile tiger.

“Get off me! Get off me right now or I will skin you and use your pelt as a rug!” Damian snarled.

Jon considered helping his friend, but the tiger wasn’t doing anything more than licking his hair now that she had him pinned. After a quick use of x-ray vision proved that Damian didn’t actually have any weapons on him for once, Jon decided to leave the older boy to his pet and focus back on Goliath.

“KELLEY!”

“You’re the bestest dragon bat in the world, aren’t you? Yes, you are! Yes, you are!”

Plus One ~ Jason

Bruce scowled as he typed away at the computer.

The mission was supposed to be an easy one. Just a quick in and out. But they had gotten just one wrong piece of misinformation and now most of Bruce’s children were lying in the Batcave boasting some form of injury.

Worst of all, Bruce hadn’t been there. He and Selina had been on a date night across the city at the insistence of all the children.

The father paused in his typing to glance around the cave.

Carrie was lying on her pillow in tiger form. Either Tim or Duke had managed to slip a cone around her neck since the last time he’d checked on the kids. Considering the lack of shouting, snarling, growling, or baby roars, Bruce was assuming she was humoring the cone for now. Normally he’d make the boys take it off since it impaired her vision too much for comfort in the cave, but she wouldn’t be running around for a few days and the cone would remind her not to lick at her stitches, something she occasionally forgot while in tiger form.

Speaking of the boys, Bruce could see the cocoon of shadows Tim had wrapped them in on one of the larger infirmary cots. The shadows were meant to help with Tim’s concussion while providing Duke with the darkness he needed to get to sleep. A flaw with Duke’s powers was that it was hard for him to get to sleep in anything but the darkest of rooms, especially after an adrenaline-heavy mission got his photosensitivity at its peak. Normally they’d send him up to rest in his room since Bruce had installed special black-out windows for just this occasion, but Alfred wanted him to remain hooked up to an EKG machine overnight due to an electrical shock he’d received during the mission.

Dick and Damian were on the training mats, though Bruce only knew the former because of the thin, whip-like tail poking out from the mass of feathers to wrap gently around Dick’s leg brace. Otherwise, his youngest was completely hidden within his eldest's wings, bundled up against Dick’s chest to keep the boy from attempting to “train” his recently relocated shoulder “back to form.”

Stephanie was nowhere to be seen, though Damian assured them she’d returned home with the group and the occasional nudging of Bruce’s mug towards the edge of the desk confirmed it. Her bracelet sat next to Bruce, the focusing stone in need of replacement. Thankfully he’d thought ahead and had extras on hand so he’d just need to bring the bracelet to a jeweler friend in the morning to have it set properly.

Cass was curled up in one chair at the meeting table with her legs resting on another as she nibbled at a sandwich with one hand and held an ice pack to her bruised ribs with the other. Her eyes had been closed and she’d looked half-asleep when he’d first looked, but as the sound of a motorcycle reached them through the tunnels, her head perked up.

Bruce turned as his second-eldest arrived. Jason parked the bike and climbed off before pulling his helmet off and looking around. He whistled.

“How’d your mission with the Outlaws go?” Bruce asked.

“Better than the mission these idiots went on, apparently.”

“We got some faulty information. You hurt?”

“Nah. Kory, Artemis, and Biz got to have all the fun this time. Roy and I played sniper. What’s -”

Jason cut off as a black form leaped onto his back. Cass quickly wrapped her arms and legs around him before he could toss her off. Nuzzling into his neck, she cooed, “Big brother!”

“Hey, do I look like a horse!” He huffed, tugging at her arms and legs. Suddenly there was a bird in his place, with a plump body and long legs and neck. He flapped his wings and shook, but Cass had anticipated the change and shifted her grip to compensate.

Bruce smiled at the two, knowing Jason was just putting on a show of being annoyed. It was obvious by the fact he didn’t simply change into pure flames so she’d have nothing to hold onto and the way the feathers around Cass’s chest were alight, the flames rising up to brush against where the ice pack had been resting before.

Phoenixes couldn’t actually heal as some stories stated, but their flames could promote healing and ward off infection. Most importantly, though, they could soothe pains. And despite all his huffing and puffing, Jason hated seeing the people he cared about in pain.

The young man gave one last gentle shake before hissing and stomping off to his and Dick’s nest. He lowered himself down and Cass rolled off his back. She moved around to his front and leaned against the edge of the nest while he draped his neck over her chest. As she began to carefully brush her fingers through the burning feathers on his neck, the feathers on his back lit up once more. From where he was, Bruce could just barely see the faint traces of Stephanie’s face in the flames.

At the same time, Carrie yawned and carefully climbed to her feet before shuffling over and into the nest. She nudged the cone into Jason’s side until he stretched out a wing for her to curl up under.

A moment later, the shadows rose on Jason’s other side and he draped his other wing over them with a click.

Smiling at his children’s antics, Bruce double-checked that Tim had left the shadows open for the EKG machine’s wires then went back to his report.

By the time he looked up again a half-hour later, the ball of near-black feathers had relocated to under Jason's fantail and phoenix flames were covering the whole nest in soothing warmth.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Cookie to anyone who actually gets the book-dog reference at the beginning of Dick's part because I've been spending too much time on Youtube.

Funny story about Halo: I was looking up different characters that have been on the Outsiders team to put with Duke and Cass since I accidentally put Katana with the Birds before realizing she's the only other member of their team besides Black Lightning and didn't want her to show up in two parts (I've decided she runs with both teams in this universe). I decided on Looker because she seemed cool then was reading up on Halo. I remembered the character from clips of Young Justice animated and thought they were cool. I wasn't too surprised to see the original character didn't wear a hijab, but I was surprised that Wikipedia uses they/them pronouns for the part talking about YJA's Halo post becoming Halo. I thought the character was nonbinary until I checked the YJA wiki for something and saw it uses only she/her pronouns. I'm pretty sure that means Wikipedia's just being weird, but I decided to make Halo bigender anyways so she uses she/ey pronouns in this universe.

[redrobinfection]

Coffee, Coffee Everywhere, Epilogue

<< Part 20

This is the final part to the Coffee, Coffee Everywhere series! Or, at least, this is the last part I will be writing for the main series - I will write brief drabbles in the ‘verse, by request, when requests are open, so if you have any ideas for future parts, hold on to them... I may open ask requests soon ;3. Thank you to user ‘SummoningSecrets’ on Ao3 for leaving the comment that inspired this epilogue, and many, many thanks to everyone who has read, liked, reblogged any part of the series!!!

~*~

"Good Morning, Master Timothy."

Tim turned away from the coffee maker, lowering the mug from his lips, and murmured a quiet good morning to Alfred as he entered the manor's kitchen.

The mug caught his gaze and he paused. The corners of his mouth twitched into what Tim knew to be the Alfred-equivalent of a fond smile. "It's good to see you've moved past your temporary aversion to coffee and have returned to your normal habits," he commented dryly, eyes twinkling.

His tone of chagrined amusement didn't escape Tim, who huffed a quiet laugh. "It's not as bad as you think. This" - he waved the modestly-sized mug - "is my first and last cup this morning, and it's not even full strength."

"Oh?" Alfred raised an inquisitive eyebrow challengingly.

Tim's lips twisted into a uncertain smile. "I'm starting at two cups a day, one decaf and one regular, decaf in the morning and, strange as it is to say it, regular at night, right before patrol." He twisted the mug around in his hands absently, brow furrowing as he searched around for the right way to frame his reasons. "I know how bad that sounds, but that combination has worked out best for my sleep and wake cycle."

Alfred nodded understandingly. "That would make a fair bit of sense considering that six at night probably feels, in all likelihood, more like morning to you than six in the morning does," he commented. Tim blinked as he considered that, then nodded slowly. Put like that, it made a lot of sense why saving most of his caffeine for nights had worked out so well so far.

"Oh, and I also have a cup of green tea at lunch to keep me going until the afternoon nap, and then a bit of chocolate here and there, but that's about it," Tim added, taking a nervous sip of his decaf as he waited for any hint of disapproval, but none came.

Instead Alfred granted Tim one of his rare, overt smiles and nodded in approval. "Very good, Master Tim. It seems you've found a healthy balance for your caffeine intake. Now it will be a matter of maintaining that balance…" he trailed off, giving Tim a mild warning glare.

He laughed. "Yeah, I know. Every now and then the temptation to binge on coffee or chug an energy drink pops up, but to be completely honest, I like how I feel without the excess caffeine in my system that whenever the urges hit, I just laugh at them." He shook his head and smiled down at his coffee. "I've been there, done that and I am done with all of that."

Alfred's quiet smile took on a proud tinge, a look he reserved for occasions such as Jason agreeing to come home for Thanksgiving or Bruce telling one of the Batkids how much he loved them. "I'm glad to hear it, Master Tim. So I suppose that means no more crazy coffee-flavored cooking adventures?"

Tim chuckled and tapped his fingers against the mug nervously. "Well, no new ones at least, and when I make the meringues and coffee pasta now, I use strictly decaf instant coffee," he explained, raising his mug for a sip. Alfred raised an eyebrow skeptically and Tim choked. "R-Real decaf, that is," he clarified quickly, hiding his sheepish grin under the rim of his mug as he took another hasty sip.

Alfred nodded sagely, the amused twinkle in his eye at odds with the firm line of his mouth. "Very good, Master Tim. We'll make a self-responsible young man of you yet." He grinned and Alfred surprised him by ruffling his hair fondly - a very rare gesture of affection from the stately old butler - as he glided past Tim on the way to the refrigerator. He began pulling out materials for breakfast.

"I suppose the only trouble now will be convincing your father and brothers to believe you are capable of such growth," Alfred commented drily as he began cracking eggs into a bowl.

"What?"

"I happened to overhear Masters Jason and Dick discussing with Miss Stephanie the odds of your return to obsession the other night," Alfred explained. He shook his head. "It would seem some of your siblings have taken bets as to when you would decline into a relapse."

"Did they?" Tim asked, forcefully keeping his tone light all the while his expression darkened. Alfred noticed, of course, and nodded in commiseration.

"Indeed. From the little I overheard and from the few things I've noticed here and there, it seems most of the family, including Master Bruce himself, have entered the betting pool. The average duration wagered upon is three weeks from the day you resume consuming caffeinated beverages, and Miss Stephanie seems to think you will last twelve days, two short of Master Jason's guess of a single fortnight," Alfred informed him drily, his exasperation with the lot of them shining through clearly.

Tim felt a flare of annoyance but smiled tightly at the elderly butler. "Thank you for letting me know, Alfred. I'll put this intelligence to good use." The one-time spy uttered a demure "of course" but Tim saw the satisfied cast to his expression. Tim tapped his chin thoughtfully. With Alfred on his side…

"I guess if they're all so sure I'll fall back into bad habits I'll just have to prove them wrong," Tim mused out loud, his eyes taking on a wicked gleam as several ideas occurred to him. "Twelve days, huh…?"

Alfred gave him a piercing look then nodded, a sharp gleam of amusement lighting up his own eyes. "I suppose you will, Master Tim."

---

The next day, four days since he had started drinking coffee again, Tim made a point to drink a second mug of something very dark at breakfast, and if Bruce and Damian thought that it was another mug of coffee, then shame on them for jumping to conclusions.

The day after that he had three mugs of coffee-looking beverages with breakfast, alternating between shooting innocent looks at the family members who were giving him side-eye and sharing conspiratorial grins with Alfred behind their backs.

That night, before patrol, he poured decaf coffee grinds into an empty "Regular" container and intentionally waited until someone came into the kitchen before making his nightly coffee, very deliberately leaving the container out on the counter with the label clearly displayed. He made a full pot, poured the entire thing into the mega mug, and had to stifle a laugh at the wide-eyed look Dick gave him as he walked out. He only drank half and snuck the other half into the back of the fridge for a quick iced-coffee the next morning.

After patrol he made himself another large mug of coffee which he made certain to wave around before heading up to shower. He wished he could have snapped a shot of Bruce and Jason's faces respectively - they were like mirror images of stony shock and disapproval. Like father like son? Jason would love that comparison. Tim didn't drink the ridiculously watered down decaf, but just so he wouldn't waste the water, and in full defiance of that one time Jason told him never to shower in coffee, he used the cooled coffee to rinse the shampoo out of his hair.

As planned, he returned the mug to the kitchen just before Jason was about to head up, letting him know in passing that he hadn't drunk the entire mug, and then asking if his hair smelled like coffee. Tim really wished he'd had his camera then so he could have documented the priceless expressions on Jason's face as he went through the full range of emotions, from laughably relieved to dramatically alarmed to full-force horrified as he surreptitiously leaned in for a sniff.

At lunch the next day, he showed up to his smoothie "date" with Steph already carrying a Venti cup from Starbucks, and he ordered a "Café Loco" with regular coffee without a trace of hesitation. Steph looked as if she'd been force fed a whole lemon. Tim struggled not to laugh throughout the entire lunch as he switched back and forth between the Starbucks and the smoothie and Steph winced every time. Too bad she didn't think to ask what was in that Venti cup - the combination of herbal peppermint tea and the chocolate-coffee smoothie was surprisingly pleasant. She probably would have enjoyed a taste.

By the end of the week Tim was giving off all appearances of having matched his previous consumption of caffeinated beverages - three cups in the morning, four cups of tea at work, four cups before patrol and the mega mug right before bed.

In reality he was still only drinking the equivalent of one cup of decaf in the morning, one cup of green tea in the afternoon and one cup of regular coffee before patrol, employing every trick and fake-out he could think of to convince the family otherwise. That meant a lot of herbal tea, decaf iced tea, and plain water hidden beneath the lids of travel mugs.

Actually, since he'd started drinking all this extra water he'd started performing better on patrol and generally feeling better all around, enough so that he was considering keeping up the extra liquids even after he wrapped up this affair. So, besides getting a kick out of everyone's poorly concealed reactions, this game had already had the added perk of improving his hydration habits. Tim was having a great time, and he was only just getting started.

On Monday he began purposefully eating coffee-flavored foods in front of the family. Six containers of coffee-flavored yogurt over the span of a single day, two with each meal - he probably needed the protein, anyway, and his gut would certainly be happy - espresso cheese over coffee pasta for lunch - decaf pasta, of course - and a mocha chip frozen yogurt bar after patrol. All pretty tame, to be honest, but the family was still aghast and poorly concealing it.

He doubled his efforts the next day, again using every trick up his sleeve to make it seem like he was eating more than he was. He munched on chocolate covered raisins at lunch to fool Steph into thinking he was attempting to eat a half pound of chocolate covered coffee beans in one sitting. He using food coloring to turn his rice brown to the chagrin of Damian and the horror of Bruce at dinner. Eating three mocha chip yogurt bars after patrol while literally hovering behind Dick in the cave just so he could watch Dick struggle with his inbred urge to turn around and shoot concerned looks at Tim over his shoulder.

Actually, Tim was a little surprised no one had said anything to him yet about his changing habits - no expressions of concern or gentle suggestions to take things slowly. He was a little upset about that. Maybe it was because Alfred was present for most of his shenanigans and appeared to approve for lack of any protest, but Tim knew it was probably because they wanted to test him. Part of their silence was for the benefit of the betting pool, but if that were the only motivator, Bruce would have put his foot down days ago. No, they wanted to see how well he could manage on his own without outside interference, to see if he could be trusted on his own.

Part of him could understand why they want to know - so they could know how much energy to invest in keeping an eye on him in the future - and why they worried in the first place - he'd gone pretty far off the deep end before he saw the error of his ways - but the rest of him resented that the family didn't believe he could grow and change and be better than he was before, that they would stoop to treating him like the subject of an experiment and laugh as they made bets on the outcome. To quote a classic, he found their lack of faith "disturbing."

On Wednesday, one day before had Steph predicted he would crack, Tim laid out his coup de grace. The family was planning to meet that night, first for a quick dinner, then briefing down in the cave before joint patrols. Normal Wednesday night stuff.

Tim coordinated with Alfred and lay in wait, so that when the family began filing into the dining room around seven o' clock, there he was, already sitting with his "coffee feast" laid out before him. All in all, he had "coffee" mashed potatoes, "coffee" broccoli, "coffee" carrots, coffee-rubbed steak, a mug of café leche, and the mega mug of "coffee."

"Uh… Tim," Dick began slowly as members of the family formed a loose ring around him, some taking seats around the table, others lounging "casually" against the wall behind him. He has a pretty good idea of what's about to happen next, and it takes everything in his power to keep a straight face.

Dick sat down across from him and continued. "So, we were all talking and, um, we realized that it was about time that we sat down with you and, uh, talked about how you, um, seem like, lately, that you've been maybe a little too, uh, 'enthusiastic' about, well-"

"Coffee. You're drinking too much coffee again, is what Dickie is trying to say," Jason snapped from over Tim's right shoulder. Dick sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose, shaking his head. Jason flipped him the bird and Bruce frowned.

"Coffee? Really? I only started drinking it again a few days ago. Have I really been drinking that much?" Tim asked innocently, turning to Jason with a startled expression. Cass stepped up beside Jason and nodded, face twisted in concern and both hands gripping her upper arms in a tense position that screamed worry. He felt the slightest inklings of guilt for worrying sweet Cass, but then he remembered that he had it on good authority that even she had cast a bet into the pool, even if Steph had had to egg her to do it.

"Yeah, Tim, you really have," Steph confirmed grimly from behind him. He twisted around in his seat to look at her and nearly rolled his eyes at the deeply serious expression of disapproval on her face. As if Steph had much room to talk; she was still nearly as bad about coffee as he had been!

"And it's not even just the coffee you're drinking, look at what you're eating!" she exclaimed, pointing to his plate.

"For the love of- are those coffee vegetables, Drake?" Damian asked, looking thoroughly disgusted even as he leaned in ridiculously close to examine the food from Tim's left side. He jumped - for once the little ninja kid had actually managed to sneak up on him - and he dragged his plate away with a scandalized scowl.

"What is it with you and sticking your face into my damned food?!" he demanded.

"Is there coffee in those potatoes?!" Damian shrieked back at him in return.

Bruce cleared his throat from where he sat at the head of the table and silence fell over the group. "This is an intervention," he intoned seriously, the other members of the family nodding along grimly.

Tim was howling with laughter inside, and barely holding onto his composure on the outside. "Intervention? But why?" he asked, letting the pitch of his voice rise high and appalled, and clutching at his chest like some offended Victorian-age maiden. Behind Bruce, Alfred's lips twitched at the corners for his comically over-acted performance.

"Don't play dumb. You know exactly why we're here; why we're doing this. Denying it doesn't make it any less of a problem," Jason scoffed, sounding annoyed. There were several annoyed and impatient expressions around the table, in fact. They were starting to catch on to his act, but clearly not the reasons for it.

Dick nodded, brow pinching as he swept his arms in gesture to Tim's meal. "I mean look at yourself, Tim. Isn't this exactly what you wanted to try to get away from by quitting caffeine and going through weeks of detox?"

"But it's not really that much is it?" Tim asked, pulling out his silliest puppy dog eyes and batting them furiously in one last ditch effort to clue the family in on his joke. Alfred stifled a cough behind his hand that Tim swore was cover for a laugh, but there were still no light bulbs over the heads of the other of the family members.

"'Not that much'? Are you kidding?" Steph exclaimed stepping forward and swiping the fork out of his mashed potatoes. Tim let it happen. "Not that much?! Look at this. Tim, you've put coffee in everything in front of you," she explained, pointing to the fork for emphasis.

"I can't believe Alfred even let you bring this crap to his table. I can't believe you can eat this stuff and not immediately hurl your guts out," Jason added hotly. "I mean, what does all that even taste like?"

"Yeah, that's what I want to know," Steph demanded, stabbing the fork into the potatoes and scooping out a blob. Ignoring mixed sounds of disgust and protest from the others, she made a face and opened her mouth to take a bite. "Probably like burnt tires that have gone through a blen- …"

She cut off abruptly and stared at the fork. Tim allowed himself a tight smile and waited for it. She blinked, then looked down at the plate. "This… doesn't taste like coffee...? It… doesn't taste like anything?"

Damian frowned and swiped a finger through the potatoes and raised it to his mouth. "Huh. It tastes like Pennyworth's mashed potatoes and nothing else," he confirmed, giving Tim a curious look that Tim returned with a "what the hell was that?!" expression, because who just sticks their fingers into someone's food without asking?!?

"What do you mean it doesn't taste like coffee?" Jason asked, leaning forward over Tim's shoulder to get a closer look. "It's brown enough to make me wanna puke, so…"

"It shouldn't," Tim informed them matter-of-factually. "There isn't any coffee in it."

The whole family froze, gears turning as they stared at him, then at his food, and then back to him again.

"Bull," Steph challenged and several others nodded in agreement.

"There's no coffee in any of it except the steak and the café leche, and that is barely half a cup of decaf diluted by a ton of milk," Tim explained patiently.

"But the food-" Bruce began.

"Is colored with food coloring."

Damian cocked his head then swiped a carrot off the plate. Tim sighed.

"Yes, no hint of coffee, simply a carrot," the youngest declared to the room.

Tim pushed the plate toward him. "You going to try a piece of broccoli? Might as well touch all of my food while you're at it."

"-Tt- I believe you, Drake," Damian responded, pushing the plate back. "I knew you wouldn't be so foolish so soon after having vowed never to stoop to such idiotic levels of caffeine consumption ever again."

Tim sighed and shook his head. "Oh. Yes. Of course."

"I'm still not convinced," Jason admitted slowly, rounding the chair so he could look Tim in the eye. "I mean, maybe the food is a fake, but all the coffee you've been drinking lately, decaf or not-"

Tim raised the mega mug and offered it to Jason. The older man took the mug warily and peered suspiciously at the contents.

"That is 90% of all the 'coffee' I've been drinking for the past eleven days," Tim told him.

Jason raised the mug and took a long draw. He froze, then lowered the mug slowly. "That's not coffee."

"Yes."

"That's…mugicha?" Jason asked in a stunned voice. Tim nodded, then grinned as Cass darted forward and slid the mug out of Jason's loose grip and retreated to one side to sip on her newly acquired prize. She shot him a small smile over the rim of the mug and winked.

"What is 'muggy-cha'?" Dick asked with a frown.

"Moo-ghi-chah," Jason sounded out for him slowly. "It's a Japanese tea made from roasted barley. Naturally caffeine free, generally tastes like cereal or unfermented beer, but when roasted well it has hints of coffee or chocolate."

"A tea that tastes like cereal?" Dick asked, eyes widening comically as his eyebrows flew up into his hair.

"Don't tell him that, Jason! Now he's going to steal all of my mugicha!" Tim cried, looking over at the mug in Cass's hands longingly.

"Quit your whining, Timbo, it's not sweet enough for Dickie, in any case." Jason shook his head slowly. "I didn't even think you knew what mugicha was."

"I learned a lot about tea back when I made tea for everyone after patrol that one time, remember?" Tim reminded them. Cass took a sip of the mugicha and nodded approvingly. "It's actually pretty good. The toasty flavor reminds me of a light roast coffee sometimes and chocolate or cereal or beer other times, just like you said."

"Mugicha is actually really good for you. Very hydrating," Jason said slowly, staring Tim down as if waiting for the 'psyche! But actually…'

"Yup. I know," Tim answered simply, waiting for it to finally sink in.

Jason blinked then glanced over Tim's meal. Across the room Bruce let out a long breath and Damian shook his head slowly. Steph stared.

"Wow. You... you weren't kidding, Babybird. You've really been skipping the coffee, just like you said," Jason finally admitted in a awed tone.

"Yep," Tim confirmed. "I haven't had more than the equivalent of two cups of coffee per day since the mac 'n cheese incident," he informed them smugly. "You all lose."

"W-what?" Dick stuttered breathlessly. Around the room several people twitched guiltily. Tim shook his head. So much for inscrutable Bats, huh?

"I know you guys started a betting pool on how long it would take me to crack and fall back into my crazy coffee ways," Tim tells them, pinning each of them with an unrelenting stare one person at a time.

"Tim, we didn't-" Steph begins.

"Alfred told me all about; don't try to deny it," he cut in flatly.

"Alfie! How could you?!" Dick bewailed in an exaggerated tone of betrayal, all the while smiling at the man gratefully and winking.

"I wasn't going to deny it," Steph continues, glaring at Dick. "We totally took bets - don't you even try to tell me you didn't, Dick Grayson because I was there-"

"I was rooting for you, Timmy. I bet it would take you at least six months, if not longer," Dick told him proudly.

"Your faith and confidence in me, is so inspiring," Tim deadpanned drily.

"Stop interrupting me!" Steph snapped, slapping Dick lightly on the arm. She turned to Tim. "Yes, we took bets, but if we're being completely honest with ourselves, we were always hoping we would each lose, that we would be wrong about our fears. This is one of those 'I hate being wrong, but this time I'd hate to be right almost as much' kind of situations'," she explained. Across the room Bruce nodded seriously and Jason shrugged with a chagrined grin. Cass crept up beside him and offered him a new glass of mugicha with an apologetic look - apologetic not just for the mugicha, but for all of it, Tim surmised.

"I still win," Tim repeated, taking a sip of the tea then sweeping a cool glare over all of them. "Because I'm never going back to drinking - or eating - that much coffee ever again."

"Well… good," Steph replied, nodding. "In that case, we're all kind of winners," she concluded, patting him on the back.

"Yes, but I actually won, so does that mean I get the pot?" he asked with a sharp grin.

Bruce cleared his throat and everyone turned to look at him. "Well. Actually, no." Tim frowned. He had been joking but, really, to be fair…

"As you all know, I didn't cast a bet," Bruce began.

Jason rolled his eyes. "Yeah, because you claimed you only wanted to know for 'academic purposes.' Like that's any better," he muttered under his breath. Tim huffed a quiet laugh - he had totally called it - and a muscle jumped in Bruce's jaw, but he otherwise seemed to ignore Jason's interjection.

"But, as an impartial observer, I kept track of the bets-"

Steph snorted. "Yeah, only because Alfred flat out refused."

"And with good reason, Miss Stephanie," Alfred chimed in, sweeping an icy gaze over all of them. "You should all be ashamed of yourselves, testing Master Tim in that way," he informed them bluntly over Bruce's shoulder.

Bruce cleared his throat and shifted uncomfortably in his chair, as if he could literally feel the chill of Alfred's disapproving glare on his back. "Yes, well. If 'never' is your final answer, Tim, then you'll have to share the pot with Damian, because he bet his share of Alfred's oatmeal cookies for a year that you would never go back to consuming that much coffee ever again."

They all turned to stare at Damian, who colored but didn't turn away from their stares. Tim blinked in actual shock.

"Wait! You guys were betting in Alfred's cookies? But-"

"Wait, really? I thought you said 'Drake is an overworking fool who will fall back into his stimulant addiction in weeks', or did I hear that wrong?" Jason asked over him.

"-Tt- You heard correctly, if incompletely, Todd. If you had continued listening you would know I said that he would fall back into his stimulant addiction if and only if we stepped back and let him work himself to distraction once more," Damian explained. His cheeks darkened even further, but he finished off his statement by saying,"What I meant was that, should we withdraw our support, surely he would be driven into self-destructive habits once again. And yes, Drake, we dealt in cookie currency."

The kitchen was a mix of reactions, ranging from proud smiles of differing intensities from Dick, Alfred, and Cass, to wonderment from Jason and suspicious skepticism from Steph. Damian's expression darkened under their combined attention and he began closing off and shutting down in the way he always did whenever he inadvertently began to show he was a real boy underneath his sharp-tongued, aloof act.

Tim stared. "Wow. So…" He cleared his throat. Damian curled in on himself defensively and Tim paused to take a slow deliberate breath. "How many cookies do we each get?"

Damian startled slightly then relaxed, huffing a small laugh and grinning sharply. "By my last count, we have at least three months of triple the usual amount of cookies apiece. Better still, Pennyworth has recently added coffee flavor to the recipe, further complimenting the flavors of the walnuts, chocolate and raisins."

Tim's eyes widened and he returned the sharp grin. "Oh? Is that so? Coffee cookies? Three per day. I can live with that."

"Oh, jeez, Tim, noooo…" Dick moaned.

Tim's grin turned wicked. "Tim, yessssss."

"Not another coffee food, we just… you just…"

"Calm yourself, Richard," Damian soothed him, rolling his eyes. "I said coffee-flavored, not caffeinated. There is nothing amiss with enjoying the flavor of coffee."

"Indeed, they are perfectly healthy," Alfred chimed in, his eyes flashing in amusement.

Dick looked around wildly for support, but Jason merely chuckled and Bruce's expression took on a fond cast.

"Yes," Bruce said, "Just this once. Coffee? Yes."

~*~

The End! Thank you for reading, everyone!!

[aion-rsa]

New Christmas Movies to Stream: A Holiday 2020 Streaming Guide

https://ift.tt/3fD2QHM

It’s the holiday season again. Thank goodness. After what has been a particularly difficult year, a little seasonal cheer has never felt more comforting or needed, even if the smiles need to be hidden behind  Christmas themed masks.

There’s never been a better time to curl up with a good Christmas movie on the streaming service of your choice. Of course that includes all of your favorite Christmas classics, which we’ve rounded up a schedule guide for here, but it also means a chance to try something new. Netflix has already gotten a hardy start to the holiday season, and yet more streaming carolers are headed for your door. So without further ado here is a guide to the new streaming presents waiting to be unwrapped.

Angela’s Christmas Wish

Available on Netflix on December 1

Certainly a Christmas movie meant for younger families, Netflix’s upcoming animated film, Angela’s Christmas Wish, promises gentle Yuletide cheer for all-ages. With computer-generated imagery, this film is a sequel to Angela’s Christmas. Like the earlier film, it’s set in the town of Limerick, Ireland at the turn of the 20th century. There Angela is desperate to be reunited with her father for Christmas. Unfortunately, Da’s in Australia. So her first notion is to travel Down Under for the holidays. When that doesn’t work, her next choice is to wish very hard…

The Christmas Chronicles 2

Available now on Netflix

Santa Claus never looked as cool as when Kurt Russell slipped into the red furs with The Christmas Chronicles, a mini-holiday event on Netflix. And with the much anticipated sequel, the man who once was Snake Plissken is bringing real holiday firepower back to the Christmas hearth.

Read more

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New Netflix Christmas Movies in 2020 Ranked from Best to Worst

By Delia Harrington

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Christmas Movies on Disney+ Streaming Guide

By David Crow

For starters Goldie Hawn reprises the role of Mrs. Claus in The Christmas Chronicles 2, but this time as more than a cameo. In fact, the whole film is set in the North Pole with Santa’s workshop never looking so grandiose in its Dickensian cheer—at least until Hunt for the Wilderpeople’s Julian Dennison tries to steal its Christmas magic! A sincere Yuletide epic, this is the first Christmas movie Chris Columbus has made since helming the original two Harry Potter movies. Before that? He directed the all-time classic Home Alone and wrote Gremlins. Will he finally  give Santa’s workshop the Hogwarts treatment?

Dear Santa

Available on VOD on December 4

After helming the sweet and heartfelt documentary, Batkid Begins: The Wish Heard Around the World, filmmaker Dana Nachman returns with this all-ages doc for the holidays. Dear Santa shines a bright light on one of the noblest duties of the U.S. Postal Service, which USPS has been executing for more than a century. With “Operation Santa,” the letters and Christmas wishes of thousands of children from around the country are gathered and sorted—and a lucky number are then answered by Santa’s helpers at the Post Office.

From Small Town, USA to Operation Santa’s ambitious outreach in New York City, Dear Santa might offer some much needed unity and happy tidings this holiday season.

Dolly Parton’s Christmas on the Square

Available now on Netflix

Dolly Parton is amazing, isn’t she? Just this year, she may save us all as one of the key sponsors of a COVID-19 vaccine that is showing significant promise. And in addition to sponsoring coronavirus research and being an absolute delight, this national treasure still found time to star in and write the songs for Christmas on the Square, another all-original Netflix Christmas movie musical.

The film is a bit of a Christmas Carol parable with Christina Baranski being a real Scrooge: She plays a woman who is going to sell her entire small town and evict all her neighbors on Christmas Eve. But with a little musical cheer and divine help from an angel—played by Dolly Parton, of course—she’s going to learn it’s a very Dolly Holiday, after all!

Fatman

Available now on VOD

Even Santa Claus has his limits. And they begin with threats on his life. That’s the amusing premise of Eshom and Ian Nelms’ dark comedic take on the Santa Claus legend. Essentially trying to ground Santa in the same type of earthy nihilism that James Mangold brought to Logan, or Clint Eastwood infused into his own onscreen legend via Unforgiven, Fatman stars Mel Gibson as Chris Kringle, a man at the end of his rope.

He’s over the hill and exhausted about the loss of Christmas Spirit in today’s youth. Worst of all, some snot-nosed kid he gave a piece of coal to has hired a hitman (Walton Goggins) to take him out. Essentially a Western in the North Pole, and a violent one at that, Fatman is amusing because of how straight it plays its nonsense. Definitely not for everyone, we’re sure this film will find its niche by the time of Chris’ big night.

Happiest Season

Available now on Hulu

A true crowd-pleaser, Clea Duvall’s Happiest Season is the type of holiday movie most filmmakers hope they’re lucky enough to make. As a story about family, love, and tinsel, this is an old-fashioned Christmas romantic comedy with a modern twist: It’s the love story of Abby (Kristen Stewart) and Harper (Mackenzie Davis).

In the film, Abby is going home for the holidays with Harper for the first time to meet her family, which includes a stiff WASPy patriarch running for mayor, Ted (Victor Garber). He and Mom (Mary Steenburgen) are happy to meet their daughter’s roommate… but they know her only as a roommate. Harper passed for straight her whole childhood and still won’t come out of the closet now with her father’s political career potentially on the line. Festive holiday cheer and familial anxiety abound in equal measure.

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Fatman: Why Mel Gibson Found Christmas Spirit at the End of a Gun

By David Crow

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100 Best Christmas TV Episodes of All Time

By Wesley Mead

Our own Natalie Zutter said of the movie: “That tension will be familiar to all who have weathered past holiday seasons, while the comfort of a happy ending is a much-needed panacea. You’ll want to spend every future Christmas with Abby, Harper, and DuVall.”

Holidate

Available now on Netflix

Like all romantic comedy subgenres, the Christmas rom-com has been underserved in the last decade. Once a reliable staple of any multiplex diet, it could produce fleeting entertainments like The Holiday or genuine all-time classics like Love Actually.

Holidate will not be mistaken for a classic by anyone. It’s a film that gets by a lot on the general charms of stars Emma Roberts and Luke Bracey, as well as the ability to indulge an R-rated vocabulary in its humor. Otherwise, it’s a pretty standard rom-com setup with both Sloane (Roberts) and Jackson (Bracey) being ridiculously beautiful people who just can’t find a date for Christmas. So they decide to pretend to be a couple to appease each’s family by going on “holidates.” Guess what happens next?

Jingle Jangle: A Christmas Journey

Available now on Netflix

John Legend and Philip Lawrence wrote the songs to this all-original Christmas musical. Let’s repeat that. John Legend, the Grammy winning singer and songwriter behind “All of Me” and “Glory,” and Philip Lawrence, another Grammy winning songwriter partially behind hits like “Grenade” and “Marry You,” wrote the songs for a Christmas musical.

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Is A Muppet Family Christmas the Best Holiday Special Ever?

By Wil Jones

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The Best Christmas Movie Soundtracks of All Time

By Ivan Radford

To top it all off, the film stars Forest Whitaker as Jeronicus Jangle, a toymaker who has just finished his masterpiece: a sentient doll that will change Christmas forever. There’s also a dastardly Keegan-Michael Key as a rival toymaker who wishes to steal the toy, but the point is it’s a Christmas musical with ear worms for days. What are you waiting for?

Operation Christmas Drop

Available now on Netflix

Operation Christmas Drop is a real procedure that is one of the most remarkable (and remarkably overlooked) performed by the U.S. Air Force. With cooperation with local authorities in Guam, the American military drops medicine, food, and toys over multiple islands across Micronesia, bringing Christmas to tens of thousands of people each year. And this event is finally getting recognized as the setting for a lovely Christmas comedy that it is.

In Operation Christmas Drop, the Netflix movie, Kat Graham plays Erica, a congressional aide who has come to the islands looking for a promotion, and perhaps unwisely toward a future as a Grinch. She’s here to determine if Operation Christmas Drop is money Congress no longer needs to allocate. But with the help of a dreamy smile from an Air Force captain, and a little Yuletide adventure, she might just discover Christmas miracles really do come from the sky. 

The Princess Switched, Switched Again

Available now on Netflix

Remember The Princess Switch from two years ago? It’s the one where Vanessa Hudgens plays both a small town American girl and a European royal who, as luck would have it, are complete doppelgangers. And they switch places just in time for the holidays! Either you recall it or you don’t, and if you do we’ve got good news: They made a sequel!!!

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Inside Pixar’s Soul and the Secrets of Life Before Death

By Don Kaye

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A Christmas Carol: the best and worst adaptations

By Robert Keeling

In the follow-up, the princess and small town gal switch places again during the holiday season. But wait, there’s more! Lady Margaret (Hudgens) also has an evil cousin named Fiona who looks pretty familiar (she’s also played by Hudgens)… and who switches places again with the princess who is not in fact a princess. Surely Santa won’t be the only one confused by all these hijinks come Christmas Eve.

Soul

Available on Disney+ on December 25

While technically not a movie about Christmas, we can’t imagine a more festive film for the actual 25th than Pixar’s long-awaited Soul. A new film co-directed by Pete Docter (Inside Out, Up), Soul is Pixar’s most ambitious film since Coco and a real emotional stunner.

In the movie, Jamie Foxx voices a guy named Joe, a jazz musician who finally gets his big break… and then falls down a manhole. Seemingly sent to the other side, Joe’s not ready to go toward the light and instead ends up taking another soul under his wing… literally since 22 (Tina Fey) is a soul who’s never lived, nor has any desire to do so until Joe teaches her the magic of jazz, pizza, and, well, living. It’s sweet, surprising, and more than its marketing suggests…

Captain Underpants: Mega Blissmas

Available on Netflix on December 4

Technically more of a “Christmas special” than a Christmas movie, Captain Underpants: Mega Blissmas appears just too blissful to ignore. Based on the mega popular Captain Underpants children’s books by Dav Pilkey, this Netflix special follows George and Harold’s misguided attempts to make Christmas “Blissmas,” a period of supreme satisfaction for everyone… but perhaps with too much selfishness. Can Captain Underpants save the day? Do you have to ask?

Also coming to streaming:

Mighty Express: A Mighty Christmas (Netflix, Dec. 4)

Super Monsters: Santa’s Super Monster Helpers (Netflix, Dec. 8)A Trash Truck Christmas (Netflix, Dec. 11)

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The post New Christmas Movies to Stream: A Holiday 2020 Streaming Guide appeared first on Den of Geek.

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[oh-mother-of-darkness]

asks (40)

Anonymous said: Holy frick that is so encouraging and I needed that so much bc I literally visited my college to measure my dorm room and drove home in tears bc I panicked myself into a frenzy about whether or not everything leading me to this point has been a mistake and what if I fail and ruin my life before it even starts (I have since calmed down a little) so your encouragement was much needed & is much appreciated

I’m glad I could help <3 <3 <3 Good luck at school! I’m sure you’ll kick its ass

areverieofchaosdreams said: It's Fanfiction Writers Appreciation Day. So thank you for all your amazing stories!!!

Oh goodness I’m all a blushin :’)

Anonymous said: *HAPPY WRITER APPRECIATION DAY* Send this to someone whose talent has blown you away, who you'd like to encourage to keep on writing always, and who you'd like to thank for working their butt off to provide fandom members with breathtaking stories to consume! THANK YOU :D

Aw thank you!

Anonymous said: Hi! I Hope you're well! Do you still take fic requests? Because I really miss Colin Wilkes and I'd love to a story of him with your writing!

Unfortunately I don’t often take requests these days, but I’ll definitely keep Colin in mind!

dirtycherrypie said: hey! applying for WE for the R&D department (may or may not be aware of producing bat gadgets)

dirtycherrypie said: SHit forgot my name - Bea, at your service!

[Bruce Wayne voice] hired

tigers-and-weeds said: Literally just fell down the rabbit hole on your tumblr for the last 12-24 hours. I am in love with with you headcannons and fics! The angst feeds my soul... So I figured I would request: anything angsty with Dick and Damian please please please

Okay again I don’t usually take fic requests BUT I like me some angst so the odds that this will eventually happen.... are extremely high. I’ll try to remember to dedicate the next one to you :) And thank you!

math--ew said: I went on a little birthday vacation to california and I've never been to the beach before. I was bending down to grab a pretty shell and this huge wave knocked me face first into the sand. Like, five people saw and laghed but I got the shell so I guess it's a win win.

Duuuude back at Lake Michigan last month the same thing happened to me. I was taking care of my little sister and her five year old friend, so I was so busy making sure they were okay that the wave plowed me halfway across the beach

babybatbrat said: when i was in ap physics i once spent an entire study period in my physics teacher's room working on one problem. as far as i could tell i was doing all of the work correctly and had all the initial values right so i was racking my brain trying to figure out why i wasn't getting the right answer. the third time i went up to my teacher and asked for help he told me to start at the beginning and walk him through my process bc he couldn't tell why i was getting it wrong either (1)

babybatbrat said: (2) so i start the problem and explain how i got through all the values - "okay so the rod is 5 inches long and half of 5 is 3 and a half -" and i stopped there bc it occurred to me that 3.5 is not half of 5. "it's what?" My teacher asks. i put my head in my hands and stood there for a minute before picking up my work and walking to the back of the classroom while he laughed, bc i had just spent 45 minutes convinced that half of 5 was 3.5 and not, in fact, 2.5, and that was the only thing wrong

Honestly??? Relatable

babybatbrat said: One time i woke up at six in the morning to hear the neighbor's dog barking and instantly realized that meant my dog had jumped the fence, so i went racing outside and sprinted down the street to catch her. when i did i picked her up and turned around to go home and then saw my neighbor standing on their front porch, realized i was in only an oversized spiderman tshirt and snowman pajama shorts, holding a twenty pound labrador and thats how i met my new neighbors

Incredible...... 10/10.....

thrakaboom said: Not a funny story,but two days ago at comic con I met Tom King and he showed me a picture of his kids while he was signing my books

Well hey that’s pretty cool

Anonymous said: I adore your Tumblr. It was a wonderful way to get into the Batfamily fanbase; prior, I thought that there was only one Batman and a single Robin, dearie me was I wrong. And those stories you write, just great. The Headcanons are just as enjoyable. As for Batman, that has come to be a sibling enjoyment. Thank you for your contributions and existence!

!!!!!! Welcome to the crew!

frnkensteingrrrlz said: hey!!! i just went through ur reasons to be happy tag and!! i'm so so happy bc of it (esp the damian hcs, they're spot on imo and he's my favourite) so i hope u have a good day!!!

Thanks! I am having a good day today! Although I’m sure it’s been a long time since you sent this :////

Anonymous said: HELLO I have just discovered and binge-read all of your fics with my homeboy Damian in them, and just wanted to pop by and say that I love you & you are my hero & you write my boy so well so thank u and I hope your life is blessed & you achieve your wildest hopes & dreams

My day is made :D

badfaith00 said: Best batman storyline you've ever read ?

Ooooooh hm I’m mighty attached to n52 Batman and Robin? Particularly the first storyline, but the second is also fantastic

Anonymous said: THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR SHAMELESSLY REBLOGGING YOUR OWN WORK BC I HADNT SEEN IT BEFORE AND ITS HONESTLY SO PHENOMENAL ITS GOING ON MY LIST OF ALL TIME FAVORITES THANK U AND BLESS U

THANK YOU!!! THAT ONE IS MY FAVORITE AND I AM VERY PROUD OF IT

onwardmotley said: In today's Detective Comics someone finally told Bruce and co that Tim's alive. They didn't explain where he is, or how to get him back, but hey. It might've had more impact if anyone was seen actually mourning Tim and it wasn't just played as him being in cosmic time out, but at least it should end soon idk. Hopefully.

Tim Drake? It’s been years since I heard that name.....

Finally. Thank goodness.

Anonymous said: Idk if I prefer your soul crushing angst or your heartwarming fluff... actually I like to suffer so I'll stay with angst lol

Y’all seeing this? Anon gave me permission. Can’t yell at me next time because it won't be my fault (thanks babe :))

Anonymous said: for music, idk what kind of music u like so here is variety: St. Vincent - Paris is Burning, Sea Wolf - Dear Fellow Traveler (tbh everything by Sea Wolf is great), Dirt Poor Robins - Eleanor Rigby, Between Wind and Water- HAEL, Ellem - Kings and Queens and Vagabonds, The Rigs - Rise & Fall, Tally Hall - Light and Night, and Streetlight Manifesto - The Hands that Thieve.

Thank you! I’m excited to listen to these! I’ll start right now!

Anonymous said: 1) What are the good comics to read for Batfamily stuff (from any point in time) and 2) what are the best Jason Todd comics? Thanks!

Okay for Jason I would definitely start with the big ones, which are A Death In the Family and Under the Red Hood. After that you could try Red Hood: the Lost Days and Countdown to Final Crisis. I would avoid the n52 series until you have a good enough grasp of the character to recognize bad writing when you see it. 

For the generalized batfam.... that’s pretty broad. My personal favorites are Red Robin, Batgirl (2009), and both B&R series. If you have more specific questions, you should IM me! I promise I’m better about answering those than asks

yellowwallsbluesky said: Have you heard Swooner by The Zolas? I've really been jamming to it lately

Listening to it right now! Sounds like a bop so far :)

Anonymous said: Hidden citizens paint it black 💜

Much obliged!

Anonymous said: Harry styles "sign of the times".

[adds to list] thank you!

neo669 said: I MISS CASA OLE!! Sorry just read that you lived in Bryan/College Station and I used to live there as well. It's kinda hard to find people that even know that it exists. But I'm sure you can kick law schools butt. You got this!

Yooooooo I miss cstat too :((((

palliddark said: Adalgiza, and I'll be a translator (English to Brazilian Portuguese)

[Bruce Wayne voice] also hired

maeofthedead said: I love your headcannons and now I sort of want to cry thank

Excellent that is the exact target response 

Anonymous said: Love your rant in the tags about the pizza making I'm laughing so hard

Listen..... I have strong feelings

Anonymous said: Did you hear they're making an omnibus of Tomasi's entire run on Batman & Robin?? I just heard and now I kinda want to get this massive book in honor of my favorite batkid and the series that made me love him so much

Man I already have all the individual volumes but if I didn’t......

sonicboom00724601 said: Hi. :) Nice headcanon. :)

I’m not sure which one you’re talking about, but thank you! You're real sweet

Anonymous said: can you maybe write an interaction between Wonder Woman and Captain America? I absolutely adore your style and would love to see your take on it.

Hmmmm I don’t really have a good enough grasp of Captain America’s characterization to try that one :////

Anonymous said: i tried to kill on mosquito that was on my ceiling by slamming it with a book but mosquito was on the move so i bounced swiftly and jammed both my wrist and thumb and now my existence is Pain. also my thumbs swelling and looks purple, so that's nice

Oh shit anon you good???

daziy said: Do we know who Barbara's mother usually is?

Yeah! In her original version, Babs had a birth mom and an adopted mom. She was originally Jim’s niece, so her birth mom’s name was Thelma Gordon. After the adoption, her parents were Jim and Barbara Gordon, with her adopted mother being her namesake. So two Barbara Gordons.

I think for awhile the canon was that her mother died in a car crash, but the current version has her still alive. She left Jim when Babs was young, taking her son (Babs’s brother) with her. James Gordon (the son) turned out to be a serial killer. 

Barbara Gordon Sr. and James Gordon Jr. both appeared in the n52 Batgirl series during the Death of the Family arc. There’s also a very good story about James from the Dickbats period. That one’s called The Black Mirror, if I’m not mistaken?

Anonymous said: Hi! What do you think of the upcoming metal event? Dick and Damian seem to have a big role in it ( I hope Jason is involved too but there's still no sign of it)

Hmmmm I don’t know that I have an opinion just yet, but as always, I hope to be pleasantly surprised 

Anonymous said: bless you are your wonderful tagging system. know that i may have avoided death because of how easy it was to f ind the thing I wanted in your tags. bless

Oh goodness anon I hope you’re not serious about almost dying.... but thanks?

Anonymous said: hi amy! would u say that damians narrative is written as a child abuse one? like there are definitely many allusions to it but its also not as explicit as say, cassandra or rose. like how much of it would u chalk up to comic world dynamics and how much to actual abuse? also would u consider jason to also be a case of this?

Oh I have very strong opinions about the role of abuse in Damian’s narrative. It’s absolutely there, and the effects are staggeringly large. There is no doubt in my mind that the league was an abusive environment, and I can’t justify some of the things Bruce did either.

I think I would say the same thing for Jason, if not quite as strongly. I definitely think that some of the things that happened to Jason as a child shaped his story later on, but less of those were abuse than outside circumstances. The n52 takes a different track on that one, I think, but I don’t put much stock in that characterization. 

Anonymous said: has jason forgiven bruce for not killing joker? if so, what made him?

Unlikely. They get along better these days, but I would argue that comes from poor characterization of Bruce, not an actual resolution process. 

mellenabrave said: My mom accidentlly threw my Damian doll away (╥_╥)

Tossed in the garbage by yet another parent--

Anonymous said: Whoa where'd you get that bat and oracle shirt you're wearing in your necklace pic? It's so cool! (The necklace is also gorgeous!)

Shoot I think it was from Redbubble? But I can’t find it now

Anonymous said: Omg that necklace was so cool!!! Kudos to the maker of it!! Also I really like your top!!

Thank you <3