#but the point is the author tries to portray it (just like everyone else in her series) as flawed

[mx-paint]

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[pruneunfair]

The Remarried empress fandom is practically a cult.

If it isn't the very pro-monarchy storyline that gets me, its the fans and how they idolize its protagonist and everyone else who supports her, this normally wouldn't be an issue if it didn't reach the point of condoning literal slavery.

The way the fans of this comic act is straight up disturbing, part of me thinks remarried empress might even be propaganda to push imperialism and monarchies. The characters you're supposed to root for are all horrible people such as a slave owner who is regarded as a cute fangirl, the ML who is a king with an annoying uwu persona that also steals from mages and kills innocent people, a grand duke is so obsessed with Navier he becomes a creep who goes around passing date-rape love potions like candy, and a brother who violates another woman's autonomy by slipping her abortion drugs but they never face consequences and if they do, its portrayed as something unfair caused by the evil women who get in Navier's way.

speaking of which lets talk about how any other woman in this story who is powerful and above Navier in some way is immediately villainized. the mistress Rashta is a former slave who was sold by her father, abused by her masters, one of them sexually assaults her as well (the narrative tries to say Rashta consented even though a slave can't say no to someone who owns them) and ends up severely traumatized after her baby is taken away and replaced with a dead one. Already off to a rough start for someone we are supposed to see as a one dimensional villain.

in the beginning chapters, Navier's ladies in waiting are already ridiculing Rashta before she even did anything all for being a slave who dared to become the Emperors mistress and hurt the feelings of their perfect empress, how could that slave not worship our empress!? What a wench!. later the narrative justifies making a slave the ultimate evil by making her into someone who "seduced" the Emperor and is ultimately written as a evil moron who is the true villain using her body to charm the poor little noblemen. (Ugh..) In the end her character is basically to be a punching bag for Navier to girl boss back into place and she dies alone in a prison cell as the most evil empress in history.

Then there's Krista, a queen dowager who didn't really like Navier but never went as far beyond snubbing her and letting rumors spread, bad but nothing too horrible, and when she sends a gift one of Navier's ladies in waiting gets all upset and asks if she can toss the gift out, its played off as a joke but it becomes clear it's supposed to tell readers that Krista is a mean mean woman for not adoring the MC.

Then when Krista is becoming too independent for the authors liking they begin to ruin her character by having pine after Heinrey, weird as hell but it could've worked if she was actually utilized as a villain and not a bug that needs to be squashed, she then gets blamed for letting Heinrey rest on her lap even though Kaufman was the one who drugged Heinrey while Krista didn't know, she's disgraced and later killed off while Heinrey proceeds to make the rest of her family suffer in the long run as well. And yet fans practically celebrated her death.

The comments are honestly the worst part, nothing but "Trashta has nothing on our queen! 😍" and "Navier is such a true girlboss! go away Trashta! 🤢" there are chapters where characters like Heinrey literally say that he'll torture people who don't like Navier and the comments are all just "Awww he's such an upgrade from Sovieshit, what a soft boy he is!" ffs it honestly feels like a cult where Navier is the god and all her supporters are her apostles.

The message is clear: you MUST like Navier! If you don't then it makes you a bad guy worthy of death row, and it doesn't take much either, all you need to do if talk a little shit about Navier and boom, her hubby has your mouth with rocks and sewn shut (yes this actually happened and it's never talked about again) if Rashta did something like that she'd be getting flamed, I'm even willing to bet if it was Heinrey who mutilated Delice the comments would either be full of cheap excuses for him or they just would give him a slap on the wrist.

I really wanted to like Remarried empress but I honestly can't anymore with the hypocrisy. Navier isn't even very likeable anymore since all she does now is react to everything and either condone what people do in her name or just not caring, so much for an empress who loves her subjects.

[stillness-in-green]

Do you think that afo's claim is true that Shigaraki never made a choice of his own?

Okay, so, I wrote about a thousand words answering this, and what I eventually settled on is that you can’t (or at least, my rambly ass can’t) really answer it properly without meandering into a philosophical cul-de-sac about The Problem of Free Will. I tried to rewrite it and it just got longer. Blame the Philosphy 101 class I took back in college.

Consider: What does it mean to “make a choice of your own”?  What is required for free choice, and has Shigaraki’s free choice been not merely hindered but wholly fettered for his entire life?  Is his agency limited in a way unique to him?  Was it possible for him to have made decisions other than the ones he did?  Why or why not?

On top of a bunch of philosophical/biological questions applied to Shigaraki as if he were a real person, you also have the meta-narrative questions.  What does Horikoshi think?  Did he intend AFO to be read as a reliable narrator in his claim about Shigaraki’s lack of free choice?  Are those answers consistent with the way Shigaraki and AFO’s relationship is portrayed and the portrayal of the actions of other characters in the story?

I don’t really want to turn this into a dissertation on the nature of free will, and that’s not a solved problem in the real world, anyway, so any possible answer is going to come down to a practical, situational assessment and a judgement call. With that in mind, hit the jump.

Per this post, the evidence points towards Horikoshi believing that All For One was making a truthful statement, if only because, if it weren’t true, presumably he would have written Deku contradicting the man, which he didn’t.  And, indeed, Shigaraki himself, in his rueful musing that he was just a kid throwing a tantrum after all, would seem to agree as well.  So taking the text purely at face value, AFO’s claim is likely true in the sense that the author intends it to be definitive.  (Which makes Deku killing Shigaraki all the more loathsome, but that’s neither here nor there.)

So the next question is, am I as a reader obligated to agree with Horikoshi as an author, and do I?

Ultimately, my answer to both halves of that question is no.  If I take a holistic view of BNHA, one that accounts for the entire scope of Shigaraki and AFO’s relationship rather than just the stuff at the very end, I do not think that AFO’s claim about Shigaraki was correct—or, if it is correct, then there’s little difference between Shigaraki’s agency and that of anyone else in the world.

See, the thing is, every piece of evidence we have pre-Liberation War points to an All For One who was genuinely trying to cultivate Shigaraki into a powerful force with a strong will of his own, someone able to stand on his own two feet, able to be a Villain to be reckoned with entirely on his own merits.  Post-Kamino, AFO reflects in his own mind—talking to no one and thus with no one to fool—that it is a teacher’s job to raise their ward to be independent.  Tomura relied on him, but now that the Heroes have locked AFO away, Tomura is ready, rage stoked, to take charge, and he’ll be fine, able to use his experiences, his hatred, and his regrets to fuel himself moving forward.

Heck, even the previous, very damning, “He will be the next me,” rejoinder to Ujiko could, absent AFO’s stupid endgame conflation of quirk consciousness with literal consciousness, easily be read as AFO intending Shigaraki to be the next person like himself, the heir to AFO’s position and resources, rather than his literal next vessel.  He’s got no reason to play coy with Ujiko, after all; if he was referencing the vessel business, why not just say so?[1] In a story that wasn’t trying to convince everyone that the continued existence of the quirk All For One is precisely synonymous with the continued existence of a certain orphan boy born under a bridge, AFO would have no reason to be pursuing cockamamie possession plots, and therefore no need for a Shigaraki whose will can be simultaneously stronger than One For All’s yet easily shattered with a single well-timed reveal.

1: See more of my previous posts than I care to try to link where I complain about Horikoshi’s bald-faced, bad faith lying to the reader for the purposes of building drama or misdirection.

Being independent means being able to make your own choices and chart your own course.  There was a point at which AFO wanted that for Shigaraki; the fact that Shigaraki was able to meet his expectations in this regard has no inherent bearing on Shigaraki’s free will.  You get into irresolvable paradoxes real quick-like if you start saying things like, “Shigaraki being independent because AFO wanted him to be independent means Shigaraki isn’t truly independent!”

It’s kind of like saying, “My parents want me to graduate from school and become independent, but if I just do what they want, that makes me their puppet.  I’ll flunk out and keep living at home, instead.  Being dependent on my parents’ income will really prove how independent I am!”  See the issue?  Person A’s desires for Person B do not impede Person B’s free choice unless Person A acts on Person B in a way that limits their choices.  Person A encouraging and supporting Person B in becoming independent of Person A is the antithesis of limiting them.

This portrayal continues into the backstory we see in the My Villain Academia flashbacks.  From what we see, AFO was not teaching Shigaraki that he could only destroy (the common interpretation), but rather desensitizing him to the option of destruction.  My read was that AFO wanted Shigaraki to be wholly amoral and grudge-bearing against Heroes, such that Shigaraki would pursue vengeance on Hero Society without recognizing or hesitating over ethical boundaries; beyond that, though, he was happy to let Shigaraki do things however Shigaraki saw fit, be that raw destructiveness or alliance-building with other Villains.

When his ward was young, this encouragement involved some behavioral modification tactics.  That’s the kind of phrase that sounds bad, but it’s actually a very standard part of parenting; I would argue there’s only one thing AFO does to Tenko that really goes beyond the pale.  Giving him the family hands and telling him to always keep them close is, by any measure, a grossly manipulative and controlling thing to do, explicitly intended to keep the boy from healing.[2]

2: Though it’s notably something AFO has been inflicting on himself, too, since we know he kept Yoichi’s hand.  Given the striking parallel of AFO coming to Tenko as one family-killing orphan “born” under a bridge to another, one wonders how much of what AFO does to Shigaraki is based on his own life, and how much that might have been behind the, “He will be the next me,” quip.  Shigaraki musing that he takes things when they’re offered to him feels of a piece with this.  Sure, it could be something AFO groomed him towards, but it could also just be an outlook on life Shigaraki learned from AFO in the same way any child might pick up on their parents’ philosophies.

As to the rest?  There are two major things I could point to, and both are—while diametrically morally opposite to the standard goals of childrearing—pretty normal in terms of childrearing philosophy.

Firstly, AFO pretty clearly buys Tenko a nice computer directly after he murders the two thugs that had been picking on him.[3]  Secondly, he heaps Tenko with verbal praise for the same act, compared to his gentle scolding when Tenko was previously being reluctant.  As to whether AFO used further methods of behavioral conditioning, that’s less clear.  Him sitting on the bed keeping his hands to himself while Tenko writhes on the floor in an agony of itching is certainly repellant, but he’s not withholding physical comfort in the way behavioral modification would describe unless he had previously been giving Tenko physical comfort and was now denying it.  After that one hug under the bridge, though, we never see AFO physically touching Shigaraki again until the cave, and at that point the two of them are mentally merged enough that AFO can presumably feel safe about touching Shigaraki without the latter having any sudden turns in temper that would get AFO Decayed.  So I think the giving/withholding of praise, and the rewarding of physical objects of value, is more supportable as an argument of AFO using behavioral modification tactics than him giving/withholding physical expressions of comfort.

3: Nothing else in Tenko’s room is 100% provable as a reward in this sense.  The rows of books are there from the very beginning.  The computer monitor definitely only appears after the thugs are killed; previously the only thing on Tenko’s desk was the pile of family hands.  The mangled Hero toys, however, could have shown up sometime in the interim between Tenko being brought to the room and his encounter with the thugs.  We don’t get any angles showing the shelves containing them in the scene where AFO is encouraging him to act as his heart desires, so we don’t know for sure whether Tenko already had them by that point or not.

As to whether all this had a debilitating impact of Shigaraki’s free will, I’m skeptical.  To my eye, and with the exception of the business with the hands, the way AFO raises Tomura is bad because AFO teaches Tomura to do bad things, not bad because it’s damaging to Tomura’s independence—unless, to return to a similar example I used before, you’re prepared to say with a straight face that it’s damaging to a child’s independence to buy them an ice cream cone for making an A on their big math test or give them a time-out punishment for hitting another child in class.  Maybe it’s “damaging” to their sense of freedom in some big abstract way, but the purpose is to teach them how to successfully navigate life, not to impede them, and it’s not anything millions of other parents and teachers aren’t doing all across the globe.  That is to say, it isn’t unique.

So yes, AFO was raising Shigaraki to be a Villain, but no mentor alive has raised a child without intending them to be something, even if that something is just “a functioning member of society.”  AFO’s goal may be different, but his methodology (again excluding the hands) is not, so if the claim is that Shigaraki’s choices aren’t free because of that methodology, despite the numerous instances of AFO openly, vocally encouraging Shigaraki to make his own free choices, couldn’t you also say the same of literally anyone else who was raised using those same childrearing methods?

This question is even in the series, sorta: during the training camp attack, Mr. Compress observes, “You kids today have your values chosen for you.”  Most of the characters in the series act according to the morals they were raised by, without ever attempting to actively evaluate or interrogate those morals.  They may be encouraged to find their own paths, but that encouragement comes with the unspoken assumption that their “path” should be a healthy and law-abiding one, whereas Shigaraki’s path will be that of a dangerous criminal—but one who’s still being encourage to choose what kind of dangerous criminal he wants to be!

I’m perfectly willing to concede that AFO raising Shigaraki to be the Symbol of Fear put more restraints on him than e.g. Jirou or Ochaco’s parents encouraging their daughters to pursue their own passions, but I’m very unconvinced that that disparity is so sharp that we could say Shigaraki has no free will at all while the heroic characters enjoy total self-determination.  Hell, in the early series, AFO has a freer hand with Shigaraki than All Might does with Deku!  All Might has some very specific ideas about the kind of “narrative” Deku needs to establish in order to inherit the Pillar position All Might wants for him—he has to keep the power secret, he has to win the Sports Festival in a blowout, he has to appear confident at all times, and so on.  All Might shakes the mentality eventually, leaving Deku freer to write his own story, but the same can be said of AFO being arrested and leaving Shigaraki to develop on his own.

Want a better parallel for AFO’s impact on Tomura’s developmental years?  Let’s look at Shouto, instead.  He was conceived and raised by Endeavor for a very specific purpose, and Endeavor was way more domineering about it than AFO was!  Does that mean Endeavor deprived Shouto of free will?  Or was he just worse at predicting how his child would respond to any given stimuli than AFO?

Shouto gets rebellious and lashes out and makes the decisions he does because of the abuse he suffers and his feelings about the parents perpetuating that abuse: can we really say, then, that he’s acting of his own free will in a way Shigaraki is not?  Does AFO having a better understanding of human nature than Endeavor inherently make Shigaraki less capable of defining his own sort of Villainy than Shouto is of defining his own Heroism?   Shouto, after all, became a Hero rather than deciding on literally any other career path; can we thus say he had no choice in what he became?  If he “chose” to be a Hero because Endeavor was pressuring him to be one but also because he wanted to become someone who could reassure others, can we not say that Shigaraki “chose” to be a Villain because AFO was pressuring him to be one but also because he wanted to avenge himself on the society that abandoned him?

AFO may have engineered the circumstances that led to Shigaraki wanting that revenge, but Endeavor is equally responsible for the circumstances that led to Shouto wanting to become “a Hero who can reassure others.”  Does AFO doing so knowingly while Endeavor does so unintentionally change the level of agency expressed by their respective children?

Would an omniscient God knowing what decision a certain human will make when faced with any given problem mean the human is less free in themselves to make that decision?

You see how deep this question winds up taking us into the philosophical weeds?  Let’s refocus somewhat.  Up to this point, I’ve been talking exclusively about Shigaraki’s path as a Villain and whether or not he made any choices of his own when walking that path.  While AFO—and Deku, for that matter—certainly try to reduce Shigaraki to a helpless infant incapable of free choice, one of the things that’s so compelling about Shigaraki is that he’s not wholly defined by his Villainy.

Think back to that big collage we get in Chapter 419 as the background for Shigaraki’s psyche shattering.  All of the images in those fragments are people Shigaraki has harmed.[4] Indeed, with a few exceptions, we see them right in the moment that Shigaraki is inflicting that harm!  I’ve seen this moment explained on many occasions as indicative of Shigaraki feeling a sudden surge of realization and guilt, that he hurt all those people and it didn’t even mean anything because AFO set him up for all of it.  That reading never quite sat right with me, though.  Shigaraki is not a character prone to expressing much in the way of guilt, and him suddenly doing so feels like…  Well, it feels like Woobie Tenko to me, a construct I loathe.

4: Give or take Gigantomachia, who I don’t think Shigaraki ever actually managed to put a scratch on, despite six weeks of dedicated efforts to do so.

As an alternative reading, then, consider that moment being framed as “all the choices Shigaraki thinks he made that were actually just him following the path AFO set for him.”  And if we read it that way, then it’s very notable what isn’t there.

All his scenes bonding with the League.  Taking and then returning Twice’s mask.  Telling Toga that going to Overhaul is for everyone’s sake.  Playing video games with Spinner.  Telling Dabi he looks forward to meeting his recruit.  Remembering Mr. Compress wanting sushi.

Expand the lens out.  Also not included in that collage are any scenes of him working with Kurogiri, trading quips with Ujiko, or winning over Gigantomachia.

Expand again: talking with Overhaul about the alliance, the bar meeting with Stain, accepting Re-Destro’s pledge of loyalty, addressing his new army?  No, no, no, and no.

I said in the post I linked before that even Shigaraki’s affection for the League is suspect based on the order of events around the reveal, but it’s telling that when AFO bellows to a shattering Shigaraki that all that he is was granted by AFO himself, the scene conspicuously omits any and every interaction that involves Shigaraki meeting with others in a non-violent way.  If we’re meant to believe that he is a creature who can only destroy, one who never made a choice of his own, those are some pretty serious omissions!

It’s not as if Shigaraki’s relationships with the League and other Villains couldn’t be attributed to AFO’s influence!  It’s AFO’s resources, after all, that allow Shigaraki to make enough of a splash that he starts attracting other Villains’ attention to begin with.  If AFO taught Shigaraki to value his subordinates,[5] it might have only been so Shigaraki could become even more determined to be a Villain because the friends he made were equally harmed by Hero Society as Shigaraki believed himself to have been.  There’s practically no decision Shigaraki makes that the reader determined to take AFO at his word couldn’t say he was groomed into making.

5: Which AFO himself very much does not, give or take how much you think that might have been different for Early Series AFO, with his stirring lines about the nice view All Might must be enjoying, standing atop the mountain of bodies of AFO’s allies.

But if that was intended to be the case, why aren’t the League in that collage, or the scene preceding it?  Why not call out even the aspect of Shigaraki that seems most genuinely and truly his, if everything he is was decided for him in advance?

And that takes me back around to whether or not AFO is supposed to be read as correct.  The conspicuous absence of the League and Shigaraki’s other allies in the “all that you are” collage would suggest AFO is wrong, but if AFO is supposed to be wrong, why doesn’t anyone ever tell him so?  God knows Deku’s not shy about pushing back against Villain statements he disagrees with!

To me, it feels like Horikoshi couldn’t bring himself to let AFO claim ownership of that aspect of Shigaraki.  Horikoshi wrote those friendships, those alliances; he has to know what they mean for Shigaraki, as a person and as a character.  The fact that he doesn’t allow AFO to retroactively poison them says to me that Horikoshi doesn’t want to let AFO have that win.  He can’t have Deku or Shigaraki call AFO out, either, though, because then AFO would be obviously wrong, and that would undermine Deku’s (presumed) decision to just go ahead and murder Shigaraki because he’s an entity that can only destroy, just as AFO intended him to be.

So instead we wind up with a story that says AFO is right while furtively, guiltily leaving out the many, many puzzle pieces that prove the complete image of Shigaraki Tomura is something other than what AFO describes.

Well, I’m not obligated to follow the story’s lead on that.  When I look at the whole picture of Shigaraki’s life, his relationship with AFO, the friendships he made, the allies he gained, I see a character who very much did have choices and, particularly in the stretch between Kamino and the first war, made them with just as much freedom as any other character in the series.  Shigaraki’s baseline morality being influenced by AFO does not limit his free will any more than Deku’s morality being influenced by Inko and All Might limits his.  Shigaraki’s circumstances being set in place by AFO does not limit his ability to make free choices once he’s out from under AFO’s direct supervision anymore than the same could be said of Shouto relative to Endeavor.

Summing it all up, I would really only buy that Shigaraki never made a choice of his own in the sense that AFO set up every choice he made, so all those choices were made under false pretenses.  But even this, the story fails to bear out thanks to scenes like AFO giving Tenko/Tomura freedom to roam around basically unsupervised, and AFO’s (as well as Kurogiri’s, insomuch as Kurogiri had the ability to steer Shigaraki towards AFO’s preferred outcomes) later arrest. AFO can't set up every choice Shigaraki makes when AFO cedes supervision of the situations Shigaraki encounters!

The question of free will versus determinism is a thorny one; it’s very normal to be hugely uncomfortable with the idea that free will does not exist, and everyone in the world is basically a highly sophisticated robot whose programming is determined by a combination of their life experiences and their physical makeup.  But if free will does exist—independent of genetics and life experience, and not fatally curtailed by the basic tactics adults use to prepare children for the world ahead of them—then yes, I think Shigaraki has as much or nearly as much free will as anyone, and AFO's claims to the contrary are just him being self-serving and inflating his own influence.

Thanks for the ask!

[teagballs]

I just read your Dennis fic, and if you were going to write a part 2 would you be able to make it that Dennis doesn’t immediately tell reader he likes her? He just starts acting really weird when she’s around?

Like maybe, Dennis Charlie and Mac are insulting Dee and reader says something like “that it’s not nice” then Dennis goes, “yeah that’s seriously not nice guys.” And everyone’s just confused cause like he was saying mean stuff too.

If it’s to much trouble or if you don’t wanna write this please just ignore this 🧍🧍

"like no one else" | dennis reynolds x reader

read part one here

authors note: ur mind anon UR MIND BROOO. this prompt was amazing and i had to do it but also it took me a month cuz i was busy. OOPS. i hope i did it justice cuz i took it and ran LMAO

requests open as always!! looking to do some charlie kelly stuff, so if u have any ideas for him lmk!!

cw: fem reader, mentions of objectification of women and the D.E.N.N.I.S system ofc, lil smoochie smoo at the end but nothing nsfw, 1.4k words

Dennis stumbled out of the restaurant, abandoning his date and this old life of promiscuity behind, seemingly. He walked down the street, pulling out his phone. He entered your name into his contacts, ready to confess everything. Ready to tell you how much you mean to him. Ready to love you. But then he stopped. His finger hovered over the call button and he thought, "what am I doing?" It was the emotion of the situation that made him act with such heedlessness. He didn't even know if you felt that way about him, if you felt the same deep connection he did. For him, it was a feeling like no other. It felt like you got him in a way no one else did. With understanding and kindness too. But to you? Dennis could just be a good friend to you. And if that was the case, what was the point in risking it all? He took a deep breath, shoving his phone back in his pocket. No, he shouldn't act so incautiously.

In the following weeks, Dennis found himself falling deeper and deeper for you. Every action you took, every word you spoke. He found himself obsessing over it. He tried not to come off as creepy - although that was hard, this was Dennis. His still kept his distance as usual, but now with a growing infatuation. He believed he was portraying this neutrality to you well, but this facade was challenged today.

"Y'know what guys, I'm really excited for this date tonight," Dee began to explain as she sat at the bar with Dennis, Charlie, Mac, and you.

"Oh shut up, Dee, nobody cares about your stupid date," Mac barked. Degrading her as usual.

It was water off a duck's back for dee, "You're just jealous I have a date Mac." She rhymed off before taking another swig of her beer.

"How'd you get this one to go out with you, Dee?" Charlie began in defence of Mac, "What'd you do? Steal his dog?"

"What? God no, what the fuck are you talking about?" Dee said.

Dennis didn't involve himself in verbally bullying his sister as he usually would. Usually, he would come in with the worst, most grating jabs. Instead, he silently observed how you scrolled on your phone, occasionally taking a sip of your drink, noticing how your brows furrowed ever so slightly in frustration.

"Even if you do go on this date, Dee, the only way you'll get him to stay is if you steal his phone or something!" Mac snarled.

"Yeah, you stupid bird!" Charlie said, which resulted in loud laughter from the men.

"God, would you just leave her alone, you two? Do you have nothing better to do?" You snapped at them finally. Dennis noticed your frustration and wanting to support and comfort you, he responded;

"Yeah, guys, leave her alone. You're both so sad." Dennis said in his usual 'I'm not wrong about anything ever and you're stupid for being wrong' tone.

Silence. Everyone, including you, turns to face Dennis. Did he just defend Dee? The sister he swore he hated?

"Dennis, what did you just say?" Mac asked cautiously and filled with confusion.

"I said leave Dee alone."

Dennis didn't really care all that much about Dee. Really, all her cared about was proving to you he did. He wanted to be on your side, always. To have your approval.

"Thank you, Dennis," you agreed. Dennis's heart swelled. 'God, what's wrong with me?' he thought. He had never felt this many emotions ever. Never mind for one person.

"That was weird, right? Earlier? When Dennis, like, stood up for Dee?" Charlie asked Mac.

"Oh yeah! For sure! I have no clue why he did that. I mean, just yesterday me, you, Frank, and Dennis were ragging on her for being a failed actress." Mac replied, causing laughter between the pair at the thought of this previous discussion.

"So... what changed?" Charlie puzzled.

"Everyone was there, except.. except for her." Mac hypothesised that when you were there, Dennis avoided talking poorly of Dee.

"But why? What does she change?"

Mac shrugged, "Maybe he's trying to D.E.N.N.I.S her."

"Huh. Doesn't really seem like his usual type." Charlie said.

Dennis was definitely not trying to D.E.N.N.I.S you. He made that distinctly clear in his mind. He wasn't following the steps at all, going out of his way to avoid flirtation with you, actually, to avoid raising suspicions. And the final step, 'separate entirely,' was most certainly one he didn’t want to follow. He wanted to spend forever and ever with you. Why? He didn't understand it himself. He was Dennis Reynolds, the Golden God! How come he was acting so pathetic?

You were starting to notice his weird behaviour. You had known Dennis for years. He was never this.. clingy? Not that you minded, really. You had always thought he was attractive, sure - charismatic too - but his general objectification of woman and lack of interest in a stable and long-term relationship certainly deterred you. Still, though, you couldn't help but feel your heart shatter every time he would talk about the girl he was planning to go out with next. You had grown tougher over the years of knowing him, accepting that he would never change, and he would never see you like that. This new attention from his was definitely appreciated, but strange.

This all came to head a couple of weeks into this behaviour. You and Dennis sat in the bar together on a slow Tuesday. You had been testing him slightly. You were saying things to provoke him - small things. Things that would usually lead to a disagreement or argument or him going on a long Dennis rant. But he didn't budge. He didn’t roar obscenities or call you an idiot or react negatively at all. He would just nod and smile. And then he would agree. You couldn't take it. Was it some cruel joke? To get your hopes up or make you look stupid? You didn't get the punchline.

"Alright, Dennis, what's with you lately."

Dennis freezes. He feared you had picked up on his feelings towards you. He feared this would be the end of it all, and he had ruined it, and you would leave and he would never see you again.

"What do you mean?" Dennis replied. He was lucky he was such a good liar. He played coy well. But you didn't back down.

"You've been acting weird. You just agree with everything I say, and you're hanging around me a lot and like you keep not making fun of Dee when I'm here. You're always looking at me too. Is it some sort of joke I don't get? Are you making fun of me? That's mean."

Dennis felt emotions, oh god. He located that he felt regret and frustration and guilt and guilt and guilt. 'Mean'. He wasn't trying to be mean. She thought it was some sort of joke, but no. This was how he really felt. He really wanted to spend all his time admiring you, he wanted to agree with you on everything, that's all he could think about for the past month. And for once in his life, Dennis was at sea for words.

"I... I didn't..." Dennis attempted. But he couldn't convey his words in a safe manner. In a manner that meant if you didn't feel the same way it would be okay and you could keep being friends.

"I think I'm in love with you." Dennis sighed.

"It was after that date. With that chick. What was her name? Candy? Karen? Doesn't matter." Dennis rambled. "It was then when I realised I never want to be with anyone else, if not you. I don't think anyone had ever understood me the way you have. And I just spiralled after then? I haven't stopped thinking about you." That would be a creepy comment if it wasn't something you had always wanted to hear from him.

It was your turn to be speechless. Instead of saying anything your eyes scanned his face for any indication of falsehood. Nothing. You saw and expression on Dennis's face that you had never seen before. One that could be equated to not knowing the answer. Clueless. Maybe afraid? You open your mouth to speak again but Dennis cuts you off and speaks first. Like he's trying to drown out a negative response. Like covering your ears to block out the sound of a gunshot; the damage would still be done.

Dennis looked at you, waiting for the gunshot.

"Dennis.. I feel the same way. Of course I do, oh my God." You finally say. Your voice is small and hoarse, like you have never used it before. Quickly, before anyone can say anything else, Dennis envelops you in a kiss. A kiss that isn't filled with lust, something Dennis isn't used to. His lips lean into yours in a desperate attempt to convey his gratefulness and love and devotion to you. You grip at his sides. You understand.

[king-bumis-armpit]

Best Friends

Written for Maiko Week 2024 - Jealousy

Summary: For as long as he could remember, Mai has loved Zuko. This was ingrained in him, just as he learned that fire is very hot and not safe to touch. It has always been a plain truth and one that upsets him. Zuko also loves Mai, he assumes. But Tom-Tom knows that he loves Mai the most. 

Alternatively: how Mai’s little brother perceives her relationship throughout the years.

Author’s Note: Big stretch of the prompt this time, lol. I love Tom-Tom so much and I have THOUGHTS about Mai’s relationship with him. It’s actually one of the things that I think the comics portrayed well. Also, this is a third person perspective, but I tried to write with Tom-Tom’s tone kind of. I hope it’s not too distracting.

Cross-posted to Tumblr and AO3 <3

WC: 2,234

For as long as he could remember, Mai has loved Zuko. This was ingrained in him, just as he learned that fire is very hot and not safe to touch. It has always been a plain truth and one that upsets him. Zuko also loves Mai, he assumes. But Tom-Tom knows that he loves Mai the most.

When Tom-Tom was really little, he vaguely remembers that he wasn't as close with his older sister. Both of his parents still lived together, and they would shower him with affection whenever they were around. When they weren't, he was usually left under the supervision of the household servants. However, they didn't watch him as closely and that suited him just fine. He was free to crawl around his house and see things most people didn't. He crawled under the dining room table and found some knicks from Mai fiddling with her knives at meals. He went into his mother’s closet and tried on her big pointy shoes. He snuck into his father's office and ate his secret stash of sizzle crisps. He knew he could have gotten in trouble, but what else was he supposed to do? It was boring in that big house with no one to play with.

Despite his exploring, he often wished for a friend. Everyone in the stories his mom read him at bedtime had a best friend. Mom definitely didn’t qualify. She seemed to think that playing was letting him hold his stuffed platypus bear while she talked with her friends. And dad was always busy working. Mai normally had school or was at the palace with the princess, but ultimately he decided she was the best option. 

When she was at home, she would stack all of his blocks into tall towers and they would take turns knocking them over by throwing things at them. One time, he wanted to stack ALL of the blocks into the biggest tower possible. He wasn’t tall enough, but Mai helped and she even held him up so that he could reach the tip top and place the last block. Mai let him have the first throw, and when he failed to hit the tower she missed on purpose to give him another go. Tom-Tom knew that Mai let him win sometimes, but he wasn’t too proud to accept her help. On his next toss, he hit the base of the tower and came down in a deafening crash. He laughed and Mai smiled, which in and of itself was pretty rare. Then she helped him clean everything up before mom came home. Normally he left his messes for the servants, but he liked doing things with Mai. She was the most interesting person he knew.

At the end of that day, he asked her the all important question. He pointed to her and then himself: “Best fwends?”

Mai nodded. “Best friends.”

— —

When he came home from New Ozai– no, Mai told him to call it Omashu– it seemed like his sister was always busy! She went to the palace almost every day. Apparently she was “dating” the new Fire Lord, whatever that meant. 

Before, when he would ask her to spend time with him, she always said that she didn’t have anything better to do. But apparently, Zuko was better than best friends. 

Sometimes mom would make Mai take him on these dates. He had to admit they were kind of fun. Zuko would take them on picnics and Tom-Tom could chase glow moths while Mai and Zuko talked about boring adult stuff. And Zuko alway packed Mai’s favorite foods, which were also Tom-Tom’s favorite foods.

But Tom-Tom still preferred the days when Mai would take him out alone. Instead of talking with her stupid boyfriend, she would catch moths with him. Or– if it was still daylight– she would show him her blades. She wouldn’t let him use them, but she would set up targets for him to practice hitting with sticks. It was just like their block game!

Maybe Zuko was her new best friend– he was too afraid to ask– but she was still his.

— —

Mai was crying. Mai never, ever cried. Tom-Tom didn’t know what to do. Mom told him to leave his sister alone, but when he cried he didn’t want to be alone. She had broken up with Zuko yesterday. At first Tom-Tom had been thrilled, but now he felt like his happiness had burnt out. He needed to make sure that she was okay.

He opened the door to her bedroom as carefully as he could. It was tricky because he could only just reach the door handle, but he managed to make his way inside. Mai sat on her bed holding a picture of herself and Zuko. 

When she noticed Tom-Tom, she set the picture aside and reached out for him. He ran into her arms. They sat like that for a few minutes while Mai slowly stopped crying. He used his pudgy palms to wipe the tears off her cheeks. 

Mai attempted a smile. “How do you feel about ice cream?” 

They spent the day in the market. It started with ice cream. And then they had to balance out the sweetness by getting fireflakes. But the fireflake stand was next to the toy store. And the toy store was next to the bookstore. 

Tom-Tom babbled happily the whole time. He knew it was important to keep his sister distracted so she didn’t get sad. Mai didn’t say much, but she listened intently as always and she let him cajole her into one stop after another until it started to get late. 

“We should probably head back home, kiddo,” Mai said. He could tell her eyes were getting glassy again.

And then something caught his attention, at the end of the street, a portrait painter was beginning to pack up for the day.

“One more!” Pleeeeeease!!” Mai followed his gaze.

“You want to get a picture?” she asked.

“A new picture! With us! No Zuko.” 

He looked up at her hopefully, and Mai let out her first real smile of the day. “Okay, kiddo. Let’s go.”

She asked the painter if he could do one last portrait for the day. She gave him a handsome tip, and he happily obliged. That night, Mai and Tom-Tom hung the picture in her room together. 

When Mai tucked him into bed, she gave him an extra forehead kiss and whispered, “Thank you for being my best friend.”

— — 

When Mai and Zuko got back together, Tom-Tom tried to learn to appreciate Zuko more. He liked how Mai always smiled when he was around. And he liked hanging out with Kiyi while Mai and Zuko had their dates. And Zuko always sent fruit tarts to their house. As the years passed, they got closer. Nonetheless, Tom-Tom was still surprised when he received an invitation to go to the palace after school one day. 

He was 10 years old now, and he was very pleased with how things were going. He finally had his own group of friends. He didn’t need Mai to sit with him to fall asleep (unless he had a nightmare which was very rare, thank you very much). And his studies were going well. 

So, he didn’t like the prospect of a royal summons shaking things up. To make matters worse, the invitation arrived during his lunch period and all of his friends saw him receive a letter with the royal seal. How embarrassing! 

Now he was sitting in his final class pondering what to do. Ignoring a royal summons had to be illegal, right? Would he end up in prison like his dad? No, Zuko probably wouldn’t lock him up or anything, since Mai would be angry. On the other hand, mom would be super upset if he had an opportunity to “network” and he passed it up. Tom-Tom sighed. It didn’t help that Zuko’s portrait was staring him down from the front of the room. At long last, the teacher dismissed them, and Tom-Tom decided that he had to see what Zuko needed. After all, it would make Mai happy.

He had been to the palace loads of times, but never without his mom or his sister. It was strangely daunting. He handed his invitation to the guards at the gate and he was made to stand in line with a lot of older people in very official looking robes. He tugged awkwardly at the sleeve of his uniform.

“Hiya Tom!” Thank Agni, Kiyi appeared to rescue him.

“Hey Kiyi, do you know why your brother needed to see me?” 

Kiyi smiled brightly. “I’ll leave that for him to tell you. C’mon, he definitely didn’t want you to stand in this line.”

An old man with a very long beard glared down at them. Tom-Tom shifted nervously under the scrutiny. “Umm… It’s okay. I don’t mind waiting.”

Kiyi laughed, “Trust me. It would be good for Zuko to talk to you as soon as possible.”

She grabbed his hand and dragged him away. Kiyi was very headstrong, and she always pushed him past his comfort zone. Sometimes Tom-Tom found this liberating, a nice counter balance to all his mom’s rules, and sometimes he found it extremely unnerving. This was the second case. They marched straight past nobles and ministers and Fire Sages until they reached the front of the line. The attendant at the door to the throne room bowed to Kiyi and let them in as soon as the current petitioner left. 

Zuko was sitting at a low table beneath the dais. His hand was a fist and he was chewing his thumbnail nervously. He normally kept the wall of fire unlit, except in ceremonial situations, but today the flames were sputtering in and out. It was very distressing to see the ruler of his nation in such a vulnerable position, but Kiyi laughed out loud. 

“Stop worrying, Zuzu! Tom-Tom is here to help.”

“He’s here?” Zuko stood up and the flames behind him died. “Come in. Come in. Take a seat.” As Tom-Tom approached the table, Zuko shoved a stack of very official documents on the floor and called for a servant to bring tea. Thankfully, Kiyi stayed and sat with them.

She cleared her throat, prompting Zuko to speak. “Hi, uh, Zuko here.” Kiyi snorted, but he continued. “I’ve been thinking a lot about my relationship with your sister.”

At this point, Tom-Tom was internally having a panic attack. What was happening? Why was Zuko freaking out? Was Zuko going to use him to break up with Mai? He had heard that Zuko broke up with her over a letter the last time. Even at ten years old, he knew that was a huge mistake. Maybe Zuko thought breaking up by proxy was more honorable. But what should Tom-Tom do? He would probably have to fight him for Mai’s honor or something. Spirits, this was going to be a disaster. 

Tom-Tom tried to imitate Mai and filled his voice with as much steel as he could. “Go on.”

Zuko visibly tensed up at his tone. “I– I know that you’re the most important person in her life, and so I need your help. I… I want to propose.”

Tom-Tom first felt relief, and then a new panic. Mai already split her time half and half between the palace and the flower shop. Now she was going to leave him behind completely. His whirlwind of emotions must have been visible on his face because Zuko quickly continued: “I know this is going to be a big change for you. But Mai and I talked about this a little bit in the past.” His face flushed. “And we agreed that you and your mother are welcome to move in with us. Your aunt too, but Mai figured she would want to stay near the flower shop. You can have your pick of any of the bedrooms.”

Tom-Tom took a breath and composed himself. “Of course! Mai’s going to be so happy.”

Zuko brightened up, and the fires behind him blazed, seemingly without his notice. “You really think so?”

Tom-Tom smiled back. “I do.”

Zuko sighed in relief. “That’s good. Mai always says that you’re her best friend, so I trust your opinion more than anyone else.” Tom-Tom finally started to feel calm again. Mai obviously loved Zuko, but she loved him too. She had made a place for him in her future plans. And she considered him to be her best friend.

“So what do you need me for?” Tom-Tom asked.

“I had some ideas, but I was hoping you could help me come up with a plan to ask her.” 

The tea arrived and Zuko dismissed the rest of his visitors for the day. Kiyi had someone send a message to his home to let his mom know that they were having an impromptu playdate. The three of them began masterminding Mai’s perfect date.

— — 

It was almost dark out by the time Tom-Tom arrived home. Mai greeted him at the door. “I was getting worried about you, kiddo. It’s late.”

“Sorry, Kiyi and I got a bit carried away.”

Mai smiled. “That’s okay. I’m glad you two are friends.”

Tom-Tom felt a wave of happiness wash over him. “Yeah, but you’re my best friend.” 

She pulled him into a hug, “Always.”

[etaindelaserna]

Can I ask from this ask game : https://www.tumblr.com/toomanyfandomsthings/749729499738996736/send-me-a-ship-and-a-number-and-ill-tell-you?source=share

No. 2, 10, 11, 12, 15 for Dramione, KakaSaku and SukuIta....Thanks 🌻

Dramione

No 2. Draco's love letters are written on the best pergament one can buy with gold. In addition he has made an effort to charm them to smell like freshly mown grass, because he knows how much Hermione adores the smell. His impeccable handwriting and phrasing are meant to turn these letters into literary pieces of grandeur about the nature of love and how obessed he his with Hermione and when she is finally going to marry him BUT in reality they are discussions about charm and potion theories, books they think the other should read and A LOT OF arguing about the practical application of said theories. There is still a lot of flirting and teasing on Draco's part, which never fails to either make Hermione almost explode or smile with the hint of a blush on her face. Hermione takes her responses very seriously and thus they are always too long, which in return causes Draco to point out, that she had made her point already 3 pages earlier. Since Hermione doesn't really get the hint that Draco is indulging her with these discussions, he at one point had started to include book pressed flowers with his letters. He even extended that to her most read books in the library.

No. 10. They are united by their love for adventure and fantasy shows that have either a certain storytelling or entertainment quality to them. They watched Game of Thrones, Vampire Diaries (of course comparing these vampires and werewolves to the real deal), Westworld, The Walking Dead (but only till season 5), Once Upon a Time (they're both intrigued by how mystical magic is portrayed), Stranger Things, Charmed, Buffy The Vampire Slayer, True Blood, Xena, The Witcher and American Gods. They tried to watch Outlander but Draco was annoyed that Hermione seems to get awefully quiet every time Jamie smiled or smirked or was shirtless, so Hermione watched Outlander, Spartacus and Rome on her own. Draco on the other hand was hiding from her Band of Brothers, Homeland, House of Cards and The Pacific.

No. 11. Draco's first impression of Hermione was, that she seems to be just as snotty and aristocratic in the way she carries herself as he was but without the name or reputation to back it up. She thought too highly of herself, her opinions and seemed to think she was better than anyone else. She seemed to only help others if it benefited her. Hermione thought Draco to be just another rich brat, who thinks Daddy's money is going to solve all of his problems instead of working hard.

No. 12. They don't talk about it, athough Draco is dropping hints and he wants to negotiate what they are going to do for their anniversary, but Hermione says, she's too busy and whatnot. In the end Draco kidnaps her. They are visiting Versailles and the Louvre and he schedules an interview with one of Hermiones favourite authors. Hermione feels guilty for not realizing how much this day means to him and allwos him to take her to a fancy restaurant. Afterwards they take a walk along the Seine and they dance and laugh and drink a bottle of wine. She tells him, she loves him and kisses him and in response he asks her if they now can start working on "Project Baby".

No. 15. Sometimes Hermione whised Draco wasn't so high and mighty but then he wouldn't be Draco and she wouldn't be able to tease him about it. Draco sometimes whished Hermione wasn't so god damn selfless all the time, he whished she would take more care of herself instead of sacrificing everything for everyone.

KakaSaku

No. 2. Kakashi's love letters are basically just post-its or random torn-off pieces of paper which Sakura finds EVERYWHERE: on her desk, her drawer, the fridge, among her medical supplies, sailing out of her clothes or stuck to her backpack. They mostly contain one or two sentences, sometimes just a word or a doodle. But the most emportant thing: they always make her smile. Sakura's love letters are at least two pages long and contain detailed reports about a new medical jutsu she has mastered, a new food item she has tried or the complete mystery of why all of her plants keep on dying. In between she slips sentences about what he would have said or done in these situations. One of Kakashi's ninken has been put on mail duty and is to stay with her until Sakura has finished her reply.

No. 10. Sakura would never admit it but she actually enjoys watching rom coms, period drama or soap operas with Kakashi. Not because she wants to use them as ammo to tease him about it but because they are lighthearted entertainment with some analysis or commentary about the hardships of relationships sprinkled in every now and then. They ease her mind and she adores how invested Kakashi is. It's kinda cute. They watched Bridgerton, How I met your Mother, Ugly Betty, My Secret Romance, True Beauty, Downton Abbey, Poldark, Tudors and Outlander. The more teenage-targeted shows like Vampire Diaries, Never Have I Ever, Reign, Riverdale, Smallville and One Tree Hill she keeps to herself. Kakashi doesn't watch anything if it's not with Sakura.

No 11. Kakashi's first impression of Sakura was that she is just another kid who hasn't figured out life yet and who is still too focused on herself and on superficial things that won't matter in the long run. He tries not to judge her too harshly for her perspective because just like all genin, she'll have to grow up faster then she thinks. Sakura had a hard time believing that this man really was an elite shinobi with a widespread reputation that makes him known, respected and even feared by s-class criminals. He seemed too goofy, yet bored to be their teacher and not really interested in teaching, which enraged her.

No. 12. Sakura debated with herself for a long time whether she should bring up the "anniverseries" topic at all with Kakashi. Not because she thought he was indifferent to it. The contrary: she knew him to be a hopeless romantic. So she felt a lot of pressure to deliver something profound. Kakashi noticed within a week what it was that put Sakura under this much stress and decided to plan little things for them before the actual date: they tried the new ice cream flavor in Konoha's one and only gelato shop, he bought a new board game for Saturday nights, they went to take pictures of them with silly little hats and mustaches, they took a dance class together and tried to paint a portray of each other, which caused Sakura to laugh so hard, she almost peed herself. It made Sakura realise that they didn't have to do anything super extraordinary. So when their anniversary came around, they spent the better part of it assembling a new kitchen cupboard. Sakura cooked Kakashi's favourite dish and in the afternoon they went to the book shop and challenged each other to find the funniest romcom title books. They read them out aloud and whoever laughed first, lost. Sakura lost and Kakashi decided to drag her to a karaoke bar. Afterwards they sat down in the park and watched the stars together.

No. 15. There are times when Kakashi wished Sakura had abandoned Sasuke earlier. Not from her life but from her heart. A lot of her training and strength was a result of not wanting to put the burden of dealing with Sasuke on Naruto alone. Some of her heart was broken and it took a long time to fix the damage. Sakura wished Kakashi wouldn’t try to handle everything by himself all the time.

SukuIta

No 2. Yuuji loves to write love letters. He spends hours deciding on the perfect paper and what kind of colours Sukuna likes or doesn't like. When it comes down to the actual writing, Yuuji isn't a man of huge or many words. He likes to ask Sukuna silly questions such as "Would you still love me if I was a worm?" or "Do you want to be my boyfriend? Yes, No, Please don't check both". Yuuji decorates the letters with little hearts or flowers, sometimes slipping in one of the fotos he's taken of Sukuna while eating or napping with a commentary on the back of it. Sukuna would rather die than admitting that he kind of adores Yuuji's innocent, silly displays of attachment. He still thinks they're a waste of time. If he didn't like the brat, the brat would know. But he doesn't want to be an asshole so he either writes Yuuji beautiful poems or paints something in return. But he never answers Yuuji's letters, which bothered Yuuji at first, but then he read the first poem and still tries to recover from that.

No. 10. Yuuji always thought it would be such a headache to persuade Sukuna to watch ANYTHING with him, let alone comedy horror, body horror or horror with some romance or strong friendships sprinkled in it, but no. Sukuna does complain a lot about the nonsensical plotlines or the lack of gore at times but for the most part he was down to watch What We Do In The Shadwos, Ash Vs. Evil Dead, Buffy The Vampire Slayer, The Last of Us and The Walking Dead. Since Sukuna wanted a little bit more suspense and psychological horror he blackmailed Yuuji into watching American Horror Stories, The Hounting of Hill House and Hannibal. Ulterior motive here being to make Yuuji snuggle up to him. Sukuna doesn't bother watching anything without Yuuji but Yuuji tries to hide the fact that he likes to watch Jane The Virgin, Sex Education and Young Royals when he feels down.

No 11. Sukuna's first impression of Yuuji was that he thought him to be weak and overly concerned with the safety of others to the point of it being not entertaining anymore. Just an annoying brat who lets himself be easily manipulated and who would break under the slightest pressure. And yet said brat was able to control him, which angered Sukuna beyond measure. At least his vessel had a great physique if nothing else. Yuuji on the other hand felt indifferent about Sukuna at first. He didn't know who or what he was only that he wasn't about to surrender his body to him.

No 12. Yuuji thinks anniversaries are important because it’s important to make new memories and also to remember the old ones. Sukuna couldn’t care less but let’s the brat do whatever he likes to do for an anniversary. So they end up in the ice cream shop from where they kissed for the first time and eat ice cream until they feel ill. Afterwards Yuuji drags Sukuna into a nearby park to watch the clouds together. Sukuna thinks it’s silly but he is indulging Yuuji and at least he gets to cuddle with him.

No 15. Yuuji wished Sukuna would stop thinking that Yuuji only likes him for his power. This and that he has zero empathy for everybody else. Sukuna wished Yuuji would finally use his power for selfish reasons and unleash his full potential. That’s something he wouldn’t be able to forgive him.

[tessatales]

The Sins of the Winter Soldier Chapter 1

Pairing: Bucky x Reader

Notes: slow burn romance

Warnings: none really, hinted past issues with reader?

Authors note: Hey guys! If anyone has a better idea for the fic name please drop them below! Honestly pulled this title out my butt and I don’t really like it. But it’s better than ‘Bucky fic’ so at this point I can’t complain 🤷🏻‍♀️

Enjoy!

Chapter 1:

You wake up to the unnerving sound of silence.

The compound was silent.

In the year since being rescued, and the six months since you'd been moved into the avengers tower, you were pretty sure it had never been silent.

Feeling the familiar sensation of dread creeping in, you sit up, thankful for falling asleep fully clothed.

Slipping on a pair of trainers, you padded out into the empty corridors, your steps silent as you listened out for signs of life.

Biting down on the inside of your cheek as you walked, you tried your best to remember what your therapist said about dealing with panic.

"Remember Y/N, your emotions are currently directly linked to your power. Panic equals power surge"

"Good morning Y/N" Agent Peters said as she appeared from around the corner, her eyes trained on the communicator in her hands.

Relief floods your body as she approached, making you feel a little light headed.

"Morning, where is everyone?" You ask, hoping the shakiness you feel doesn't portray in your voice. Agent Peters doesn't stop, continuing on her way through the building as she speaks.

"They're all in the Pit"

The Pit?

There was only two reasons they'd all be there, and as you haven't been shipped off somewhere in the middle of the night because Hydra had found you, it will be the second option.

They've caught someone.

-------------

"Who do we have?" You ask breathlessly as you make your way to the front of the observation deck, only to be held back by several pairs of hands.

"Are you out of your mind Y/N? Who told you we were here?" Tony demanded through gritted teeth. The panic in his gaze obvious. Sensing you were about to get Agent Peters in trouble, you decided to be vague.

"Just some Shield Agent I passed in the corridor, I got scared when I couldn't find anyone so they told me you guys were down here" You reply sheepishly, hating having to admit as a grown adult that you were afraid. The remaining hands drop from where they held you, one or two squeezing you affectionately before doing so.

"Sorry kid, we didn't think about what it would be like for you to wake up and find no one, but this stuff is sensitive." Steve said, making his way to stand in front of you.

"Is it bad?" You ask, anxious to know whos down in containment.

"He wasn't when I knew him. But that was a long time ago now"

"You've caught the Winter Soldier?" You gasp. Steve nodded.

"Though I knew him as Bucky"

Gesturing for you to follow, Steve made his way towards the edge of the deck.

"It took the Big Guy removing his robotic arm to detain him. But we did it.” Tony said over his shoulder as he worked on the holograms in front of him.

“Found him in Siberia." Steve continued as he lent against the railings above the Pit. You hovered just a step away from it, scared of what you'd see when you peered over.

"Don't worry, he cant see you from here" Natasha said, coming to place her hand reassuringly on your shoulder. With a nod, you stepped forward, holding your breath as the Pit came into view.

The man you could see below didn't look like a deadly assassin. He didn't really look real. You'd seen the affects the serum had on people, you'd read every file you could on Steve and everyone else on the team since arriving at the compound. But this man looked different.

He stood motionless in the middle of the shielded cell, his body perfectly placed for any oncoming threat. He seemed to lean heavily to one side as if unsure how to balance himself without his metal arm, and even from this height you could see the angry red scars that wound around what remained of the metal appendage.

"He looks sad" You mutter, staring down a the Winters Soldiers profile.

"That's one way to look at it, I think he looks damn angry" Sam said, crossing his arms as he leaned over to take a look.

"You’re bitter because of the car thing" Tony commented, his eye never leaving the hologram before him.

"And you wouldn't be?" Sam countered, eyebrow raised in question. Tony didn’t reply.

"What are you going to do with him?" You ask no one in particular, barely managing to tear your eyes away to look at Steve when you get no response.

"Tony and Bruce are looking into the arm, making sure there's no trackers imbedded in it. While the Shield team are convinced that the longer he is away from Hydra, the more likely it will be for us to be able to deprogram him." Steve replied as he moved away from the edge.

You felt the surprise flood your body at the decision.

"They're not going to try to use him?" You half whisper. Steve shook his head but said nothing.

"Not like this.” Natasha answered for him, looking between you and Steve.

“Once upon a time, Bucky was one of us. Shield hope that if they can get him back to pre-programmed Bucky, he might offer his skills willingly." Steve said, his gaze unfocused as he looked down at his friend.

"But what if he doesn't?" You say with a frown, looking again at the man in the cell.

"If he doesn't, he'll be free to go wherever he likes. Hydra and Shield free" Steve said, a hint of a smile on his face. Although he was trying to hide it, you could hear the bittersweetness in his voice as he thought about it. Because if Bucky said no and left, he’d be leaving Steve behind.

"You'd get your best friend back" You say with a small smile, trying your best to pull him out of his melancholy thoughts as you hugged him around the middle.

"I would" Steve said with a laugh, hugging you back.

"Until that day however, we’re going to have to ask you to stay away from here." Nat said as you pulled away from Steve, turning you by the shoulders. You felt yourself pout.

"Why? Surely him being locked down there can’t affect me?" You ask with only a little annoyance evident in your voice.

"We don't know. All Hydra know about you so far is that we have you. The last thing we wanna do is broadcast your whereabouts via their deadliest asset." Natasha continued turning you to face the rest of the team. Scanning the teams faces, you could see they all felt the same.

"Here, stayed up to finish it when I found out they were bringing him here" Bruce chimed in, handing you your very on comm bracelet.

"This way you can talk to any of us whenever you need to without having to come down here." Nat said with a smile.

"Don't worry, I’ll stay away. This is the longest I’ve stayed in one place. I'm not jeopardizing that." You reply, slapping the bracelet on and looking at everyone. This was your new family. You weren't going to mess that up.

A/N: Chapter 2 can be found here

[harrypotterfuryroad]

Can you explain to me the "Hermoine tries to fight for house elves to be free or whatever" plotline, please? I never read Harry Potter but I'm thinking about giving the series a shot and I want to prepare for whatever discourse I'll come across on this hellsite.

so before getting to that we gotta go over how a fish-out-of-water character works in a series like this. it's usually the protagonist, and it's usually a way for the author to explain details about the setting in a way that doesn't completely halt the narrative. it can be simple and straightforward, or the author can use the juxtaposition to drive conflict or character development

harry potter has two fish out of water characters: harry and hermione. they're both viewing wizard society as outsiders, but harry's perspective is influenced by the fact that he knows his parents were famous wizards (and the fact that he's a famous wizard) where hermione is coming in with no preexisting connections

this means that harry interprets everything about wizard society as though it's normal, or at least he thinks he's supposed to think it's normal. through harry's eyes everything is novel and exciting, but because of his preconceived notions he doesn't really stop to think about why things are the way they are. also probably helps that anything is a major step up from living in a closet (and he's usually too preoccupied with not getting murdered to think too hard about stuff)

hermione however has nothing stopping her from pointing out the hypocrisy or otherwise weird traditions present in wizard culture. this leads to her highlighting the mistreatment of house elves in goblet of fire. the first major discourse point is that this writes her as shrill or abrasive or otherwise in the wrong, since that's how the people around her respond to it, but it's pretty clear that this is actually done to portray everyone else as too blinded by tradition to see what they might need to change

this all kinda ends up with a misread of the series (more a miswatch really, more on that in a sec) where everyone loves oppressing house elves and the house elves are grateful for their mistreatment. there are plenty of other moments in the series that also get this treatment, but it's because people read ron telling hermione to stop making a big deal about something as the text endorsing the thing in question, where instead it's usually to use ron as the stand-in for entrenched wizard society traditions. when ron says "don't worry about it, they like helping out," it's very obvious that you're supposed to find him callous and insensitive for thinking that

the biggest thing driving the dumbest parts of the discourse is that the movie adaptations largely drop the house elf plotlines after the second movie. if you watch the movies and that's it, you'd be totally right to come away thinking that the series uses abuse of domestic servants as a source of comic relief. and then you hear about hermione's house elf plotline and figure that it's also more about comic relief, leading to an uncharitable read of the series. if all you need is ammunition to say wizard lady bad, then why would you dig any deeper

but ultimately hermione being a house elf activist is used to show her as being able to stick up for her values even when she's going against a thousand years of ossified tradition (gryffindor 10000%, ravenclaw hermione truthers can see themselves out), and to show that tradition isn't inherently valuable

so yeah anyone who comes at you with "lul the series says house elves love being slaves" is just straight up not paying attention because the entire point is to break that down

[melloneah]

6 for geto & 22 for megumi and/or yuuji for the character ask?

HAAAAA thank u for the ask >:3333

6. What's something you have in common with this character?

i Very Rarely relate to characters in shows but i feel like geto is one of the exceptions hehehe i feel like our moral views align in a way which we both tried to believe and do what's "right" without much questioning at first and then suddenly got slapped in the face by the reality of what a 'society' entails 😀 so uh. similar thought processes and experiences during the whole ordeal of discovering the world sucks and there's no way to really fix it (without murder? dshkfsjd) him and i are one and the same minus the genocidal tendencies<33 i also feel like his personality is quite toned down and calm unless he's surrounded by people closest to him, which is very me!!!!!

22. If you're a fic reader, what's something you like in fics when it comes to this character? Something you don't like?

Yuuji

hhghhgf hard question. i basically love it all but ill try to limit myself to one each

i love seeing lonely yuuji that's surrounded by people </33 in general that's such a real, painful, gorgeous, often overlooked aspect of being human, and it's often dismissed in everyday life bc 'U HAVE FRIENDS WDYM UR LONELY!' but anytime i see it written in fic the descriptions and the raw defeat and the pain just hit so hard, and it just matches the character of yuuji SO SO SO well. he's so open but he just Cant Seem To Get Close to people in Any Meaningful Way. oh my GODDDD it hurts So Bad but i adore it. it's my favourite thing to read. and special mention to loner yuuji who isnt surrounded by people too. lonely yuuji has his own reserved yuuji shaped spot in my heart

i feel like i love everything about yuuji's character so it's hard to pick a dislike 😭 i think it's more of a mischaracterisation than an authors creative choice, but i dont love it when yuuji is portrayed as sort of morally grey or slightly mean bc to me that's just not even him anymore sdjfhsdjhf yuuji is a ray of sunshine who does everything to make everyone else feel at ease!!!!!!! who r u writing bc that isnt him!!!!!

Megumi

i love it when fics make him suffer :3 as if we dont have enough of that in the manga........but i truly feel megumi's character is a great vessel to use in order to explore deeply rooted trauma, crises and complex emotions - his philosophy already illustrates that he doesnt blindly follow the objective 'good' and he doesnt see the world as black and white, which points to him generally being more self-aware and thoughtful. i feel like this translates into a sort of 'open space' in his character to freely and deeply explore for example shame, societal pressures, lived trauma, guilt or some internal struggles etc, whereas for example yuuji would probably be slightly more in denial, which would mean the thought processes described would be less direct and harder to explore deeply imo. so basically megumi is the epitome of overthinking and i like seeing him suffer over it :3

for dislikes in fic uhmmmnnmmn. id say making him too sweet/nice/open? in my mind the core of his character is that he's sorta standoffish and distant and mean lmaoo so it's strange seeing him fold immediately and be super sweet; i like seeing the gradual trust building and eventually opening up a bit but still keeping his personality!! but that's just a personal preference and actually now that i think abt it it's not that it bothers me when i see it lmaooo i just prefer the latter

ASK ME THINGS PLEASE I AM ON MY KNEES BEGGING PLEASEPLEPALEPLASEPLASEPLEASE :3

[shadamyheadcanons]

As much as I love the art style of the idw comics, I hate how they portray Shadow in it. Granted, Shadow can be proud at times, they still portray him to be a bit too arrogant.

The one thing I really dislike that doesn't get talked about enough is when Shadow and Sonic fight over redeeming Eggman. Sonic then says that Shadow tried to destroy earth and you could say that he was comparing Shadow's actions to that of Eggman's.

Eggman destroys and hurts people because he can and he wants to. He does it so that he can take over the world. He wants and craves power and authority.

Shadow's memories were altered. He lost probably the only friend who treated him like a normal being rather than a science experiment. He lost Maria and was grieving when Eggman found him. And the last thing he remembers is Maria telling him to get revenge (memory alteration by gerald). While, I am not saying that what Shadow did was right, he atleast didn't try to hurt anybody because he wanted power or authority. And the people who were responsible for Maria's death attacked the ark because they were Greedy and power hungry.

Atleast Shadow redeems himself properly. He helps those around him while still carrying the memories of the time he tried to hurt civilians. He is trying to be a better person. He isn't ignoring his past mistakes or hasn't forgotten them and is growing from that. As soon as he trained his memories, he tried to save earth. Granted that is what Maria wanted but he could have chose to not follow through with his promise to her. He could have let the world burn but he didn't.

Suppose the zombot arc didn't happen and Eggman stayed an amnesiac, that still doesn't feel like an earned redemption. As soon as he got his memories back, he tried to hurt everyone again. He could have chose to redeem himself but he didn't.

Sonic comparing the two annoyed me because they aren't alike. Shadow will always be a better person than eggman could ever think of being.

In honor of me finally catching up with all of IDW and no longer fearing spoilers, I can finally give this ask a long overdue answer! Better late than never, right?

As for the ask itself...oh, thank God someone else feels the same way I do about that interaction. It’s no secret that I don’t like how Shadow behaves in IDW, but I normally like IDW Sonic.

But the way he treated Shadow in issue #6 was inexcusable.

Under the cut: spoilers for IDW #6 and beyond, as well as harsh but fair (IMO) criticism of Sonic’s behavior in that issue. I am...passionate about this.

As is often the case, Sonic and Shadow are at each other’s throats once again due to their opposing philosophies. They both have valid reasons, and neither is 100% right. I’m mostly on Sonic’s side here, but he’s uncharacteristically naive about the situation.

That’s one way to describe a murderous villain bent on taking over the world at the expense of countless innocent lives, I guess.

Eggman played a part in compensating for his own terrible deeds in SA2, likely so he could have a home to come back to and conquer. Self-serving from start to finish. Meanwhile, Shadow nearly lost his life saving the human race, despite their role in his traumatic, tragic past, all because two pure-hearted young girls asked him to.

Nice of you to bring up one of the most confusing, painful parts of Shadow’s life like that, just to point out the wonderful role Eggman played in protecting his claim on the Earth so he could conquer it later himself. Again. Couldn’t help but notice you skipped the way Shadow...

Was forced to relive the traumatizing memories of the humans murdering his best friend

Was nearly shot by a man who falsely accused him of massacring a space station full of humans, including said best friend

Was pulled in a million directions by people he barely knew when he didn’t even know who he was

Turned against his own species (the Black Arms) and personally enacted a genocide against them all to save the world and the humans AGAIN despite all that. I see no way this couldn’t have negatively impacted him on some level

Oh, and Eggman? He cloned an army of Shadows without his consent and took advantage of Shadow’s identity crisis to convince him he was an android Eggman had created

Really, Sonic? Because I recall him leaving you alone until you made a point of picking a fight. Did you forget he was brainwashed that entire time - by a man who called Shadow his own son, no less?

You know full well Shadow’s more than earned his redemption. You could have argued your actual point, but instead, you chose to guilt Shadow with a cheap shot for things he either wasn’t responsible for or has already grown past. This is in a world where he’s judged as a villain by the very people he was created to protect. Shadow’s a hero in a way Sonic can’t even fathom. Sonic’s always been beloved by all but the worst villains. He will never, ever understand what it’s like to protect humans who’d lock him up forever at the first opportunity (proof: Sonic 06). I’d argue Shadow’s the biggest hero in this franchise for that reason, and someone who’d sincerely compare him to Doctor Eggman at the end of the day could never appreciate that.

It takes a lot to make me side with IDW Shadow. I still don’t agree with his plan to kill Mr. Tinker, but it absolutely kills me to see him cave so quickly while Sonic has this smug smirk on his face, as if he’s right and Shadow’s wrong and that’s all there is to it. They agree to follow Sonic’s plan entirely, no compromise, not even doing the bare minimum of stationing a scout in Windmill Village to keep an eye on Mr. Tinker.

At least Shadow got to slam the door in his face. Sassiest use of Chaos Control to date. A+.

Sonic’s usually solid in IDW, but he gets preachy here and there IMO, particularly when it comes to forgiveness. Virtually every problem has been caused or exacerbated by him giving villains a slap on the wrist and taking no further precautions. There were times in the past where Sonic was more on the level of “I won’t kill you, but I don’t have to save you, either.” I miss that sometimes.

This might be predictable coming from me, but I wish Amy could’ve been there. Partly because she’s a good judge of character and she might’ve been able to talk some sense into Sonic, but also because I would love to see someone stand up for Shadow, to back him up with the righteous indignation he deserves. I can picture her turning on Sonic for this.

“HOW DARE YOU TALK TO HIM LIKE THAT! SHADOW’S ONE OF THE BRAVEST HEROES WE’VE EVER MET!”

Shadow deserves that validation, and Amy’s passion would make her perfect for the job.

It also would’ve been nice if Rouge had followed them up the hill instead of waiting down in the village. I doubt Sonic would’ve dared to say any of this with her around.

Side note: Eggman may not have earned the forgiveness he got from his memory loss, but the loving people of that village absolutely deserved everything Mr. Tinker did for them. I’m still legitimately upset that we lost that.

[seggsynugget]

With tender light finally ending, I thought I would put my thought together in a little rant. It's a bit long and all over the place so bear with me. (Might contain spoilers, possibly. Proceed at your own risk)

As someone who loves murder mysteries (Surprise surprise my favorite author is Agatha Christie), Tender Light definitely kept me on my toes. I loved the whole did they, didn't they thing they had going on. I'm not gonna lie for at least the first half of the show I truly thought Zhou luo and Nan ya killed Xu yi together, but I think the point where I became convinced that he was telling the truth about not killing Xu yi was when the teacher he was involved in the scandal with said Zhou luo was a very truthful person who basically would not co sign his name to anything he actually didn't do. Besides the professor many other people also vouched for his character, which further convinced me.

There's a saying that my mom always told me as a kid. "Be more scared of people than ghosts, because people are out to get you". This show further proved her point. Those villagers would be the first to tell Zhou Luo to keep his nose out of other peoples business, especially a married couples business. However this did not stop these hypocritical people from taking part in the train station incident and humiliate Nan ya. Even Zhou luo was complicit in the humiliation of Nan ya in the beginning until she made him realize how shameful all this gossiping and dog piling was. This makes you think if you were in the shoes of the villagers would you do better or be like sheep and just conform with everyone else.

Nan ya. I don't think I've ever stood by a character like I did Nan ya. Even if she killed Xu yi in a premeditated fashion I would have stood by her regardless. She has got the short end of the stick her whole life and suffered at the hands of stranger and family alike, due to no fault of hers. She is one of the strongest characters I know. It definitely came across as Zhou luo being the one that loved the most in that relationship but I think Nan ya loved him equally, if not more. I personally don't think I could've held back my feeling for the only person that treated me with a shred of dignity in that village. while that ending was satisfactory, Im just gonna pretend Nan ya and Zhou luo end up walking into the sunset living their best lives with wan wan.

I felt like Qingli and Zhou luo were pretty similar in the way that they were very gungho about their crushes, but I think what set the two of them apart for me, was the fact that Zhou luo knew when to back down (and we are talking about Zhou luo, one of the most impulsive men there ever was). He tries not to do anything that may implicate Nan Ya or be detrimental to her. While he is crazy about Nan ya he doesn't let that love cloud all his judgment and his decision making. The same cannot be said for Qingli, who is a bit more selfish with her love. We see this with the whole sex scandal she almost caused when the detective was questioning the four friends. But I get it, she's a teenager,, of course she's not thinking 10 steps ahead, or worrying about repercussions. This is why I feel like Zhou luo is so much more mature for his age.

The ending really infuriated me ngl. Let's be real, in reality aint no way those fuckass cops are able to crack the case open the way they did, but you know it's a Drama, propaganda and what not. Overall, tender light gave me a lot to think about and reflect on as a human being. The writers really did a great job in portraying human nature. It's a 10/10 for me.

If you read this far, thank you lol. I'm gonna leave these treats here for you. I love how they used the opening titles to give us a gist of what the episode was going to be about. These are some of my favorites.

Lastly, I will always be grateful for tender light, if not for anything, then for the beautiful and devastating poems that it gave to me 🤍

[quietbluejay]

Horus Rising 10

let's cut over to Karkasy he's hanging out at the bar and playing cards he's not good at it yeah more food for the "iterator duties have crossover with the secret police" thought:

or well. Some level of state-sanctioned social control besides the obvious.

and also to beat them at cards lmao the remembrancers err made some changes to the decoration

oh yeah we also get a little aside about a dude who works in climate control having a secret distilling operation well you can't have soldiers without having a secret still so karkasy is going over to see the dude who handles the alcohol and then he spots loken sticking out like a sore thumb everyone sees him lol and he looks very uncomfortable

loken: i'm just…looking for keeler.. karkasy: she's not here look come with me karkasy: your metaphorical itchiness is giving me hives

let's go see euphrati! half naked hot soldier dude answers the door at least i'm assuming he's meant to be hot given he's described as looking like a total badass soldier manages to dissuade Karkasy but Loken looms over his shoulder to his credit soldier dude tries to stop loken and tells him euphrati isn't there Euphrati doesn't look great and she's understandably unhappy to see Loken she's also drinking a lot honestly, having tried this kind of maneuver myself, i'm impressed with keeler

it's not that easy to walk over, pour yourself a drink, and walk back all while staying wrapped up in sheet so she was expecting to see Loken weeks ago

keep your shirt on loken do you have no manners did french take over writing this segment wait did he just put it on the floor?? loken: guess it can't make the mess in here worse loken, this isn't margaritaville

anyways she completely forgot she took them and told Abaddon she hadn't, then she later found them on her camera

she had some classic trauma symptoms the pictures thing was kind of a cry for help but she's fiiine now and feels a bit silly about it loken: yeah uh why didn't you tell the first captain about it euphrati: i'd had enough of him trying to gaslight me about it, this was proof that i didn't go crazy euphrati: you're one of the authorities i know but you were there euphrati: i thought you might tell me the truth

he takes out the slate and Euphrati is definitely not as over this as she wanted to portray earlier Loken points this out Euphrati: gee yeah ya think? okay she's pissed off and even though the images are terrifying she's going to run through all the problems with the "wild beast" story a woman after my own heart

she caught something else as well…

euphrati: but it's fine. i'm over it. it was a wild beast. ok.

Euphrati managed to get through this with well she's not going to say it too obviously, but it's the Imperial Cult Euphrati, sniggering: the Emperor Protects

behold the first imperial saint she's got an uncomfortable question for loken, though

loken: it doesn't matter because it would never happen! loken realizes she's talking about civil war, heh loken: that sort of thing will never happen with Horus as Warmaster what's better than dramatic irony? dramatic irony that flows naturally as part of a conversation! anyways, loken has to leave now, he got a call yes he does in fact pick up his robe after he's gone, Euphrati pulls out her secret shrine and starts going through prayers back over with Loken turns out a new ship has joined the party Sanguinius himself is here let's have another flashback Loken telling Mersadie about Ullanor not the actual battle, but the party after

whew four mechanicum fleets did this in a month now that's what i call a vanity project

yeah a private affair also until Loken got appointed to the Mournival, he'd only ever seen the other primarchs from a distance including at Ullanor they still left an impression

angron red and angry wheezes im also recalling that scene from A Thousand Sons with Magnus' magnificent and thrusting breastplate okay time for Sanguinius to actually show up

how many hair colours has sanguinius gone through oh he's wearing a reta but presumably larger

Torgaddon shows him the remains

yet another thing i guess i can't actually blame McNeill for (Sanguinius' tears AND the things on his wings)

dude dude do you know what a pinion is a pinion is A FEATHER so Sanguinius thanks everyone while Horus glares daggers at Eidolon lol

if this guy gets called "most noble" it is only, like many other superlatives attached to primarchs, because the bar is underground im still chuckling over "we will murder murder together" though so they spend six months on Murder killing megarachnids Horus gets to take the field over Abaddon's objections he spends a good deal of time winding up the mournival it's a nice moment Horus: you know if i'd thought becoming Warmaster would mean never taking the field again, I'd have given it to Guilliman or Lion, who wanted it everyone: lmao it's hahahah what lion would deserve hahahaha

honestly you know what loken is pretty good at reading people and has gotten better over the course of this novel, i'm going to take his word on this the remembrancers aren't allowed down so Mersadie and Loken hang out a lot whenever he's back up on the ship oh yeah Tarvitz and Torgaddon are buddies now which is why Eidolon is slowly being allowed back in the command tent Sanguinius is also trying to make sure there isn't too much conflict between Fulgrim and Horus you know come to think of it Sanguinius has had some remarkably stable characterization in that he doesn't really care about the little people and his main concern is the other primarchs as happened in the whole agonizing over killing Konrad but being pretty whatever over Lion killing several million people another thing is him consistently playing peacemaker yeah honestly my read on him as anxiety ridden twentysomething Catholic woman who keeps a journal is pretty on horus is right and should say it:

i wonder also how hard Abnett had to resist saying "Perturabo's perturbations" there's also a little talk about rebranding lol apparently the Emperor advised renaming the sixteenth to the Sons of Horus (dun dun dun)

next time we hit the interex!

[gummywormsandkitkats]

Not a horny post, more of a vent, really, so I'll hide it below as to not mess with anyone's vibes tonight~ (｡◞︿◟｡)

It's just kind of weird being the "first-trans-girl-to-do-X," but it's being portrayed and congratulated as it being "the-first-time-a-woman-has-done-X."

Like, okay, in a way, yeah, sure. I'm not complaining about the validation part of it personally. The universe only knows that my fucking brainworms desire this validation, and are happy that they are trying- I still get deadnamed by these same people, it still stings when I get misgendered. It comes with being apart of a community for over a decade, then pushing past your own fears and issues to present yourself as trans. In a way, it feels like my friends are trying to respect that by portraying my actions as being completed, "as a woman."

But... I'm also trying to be a role model for the other trans people in our community.

I want to let everyone else know that this space is safe. I have actively pushed to be in leadership to make sure there was a voice heard. I want to be able to step in with some authority when someone tries to be a dick to a member of our community. Feedback that the other trans members feel more comfortable joining us when they see that another trans person is a part of the guiding team has already come my way, and that's what I want- I want them to feel like even when we all work in massive crowds of people (not all of whom are happy to see us), that they are safe and taken care of, cause their trans boss will fucking oust anyone who gives them shit in a heartbeat-

Getting back to my point, I guess I'd rather these moments be portrayed as "the-first-trans-person-to-do-X" instead. I don't hate the validation aimed at myself, but I'd rather it be aimed in a way that it'll give validation to trans people thinking about climbing the ladder to take my job- Cause fuck yeah, do it!!

I don't know. Maybe I'm just overthinking my own importance in the matter, and it really doesn't matter that much.

Bleh... ૮ ◞ ﻌ ◟ ა ᵇᵃʳᵏ ᵇᵃʳᵏ

[yawntu]

𝖜𝖊𝖑𝖈𝖔𝖒𝖊 𝖙𝖔 𝖒𝖞 𝖇𝖑𝖔𝖌

About the Author

My names Mazi, but you can call me whatever. I was raised in a multi language household so English sometimes blurs for me if you can’t tell- don’t feel bad pointing out grammar or spelling mistakes. I use grammarly but i’m so used to having a real person to edit my stuff lol. I was convinced I was a lesbian my whole life but have a bf now so i’m confident in my ability to write mxf and fxf. I am going to get more comfortable with mxm though so I can make male!reader versions of my fics more realistically so everyone can thirst here.

I am a writer by nature (which means y’all can clown me when I post unedited things). I actually hate writing in second person and it’s my weak point (hence the blog). I am in university for history so I like to think I can write with a passable rate of literacy but I smoke weed and then post these bitches soooo. As I have a specialized field of study which means I am regularly working on actual journals and articles but I promise I will still try to post semi often.

Requests

Okay now the important part, how can you guys send requests to me or just thirst!!! I’m really using this as a fun way to help my writing get better. Some ground rules:

Ask box is not open rn but will be!! Submit anything within my guidelines listed below!!! I can not promise everything will be a full fledged fic but you’re 100% getting at least a little drabble essay. NSFW and SFW welcome

If you wanna attach like aesthetic pics / music to your request so I can fit the vibe you want better feel free

I will write for most characters though it may take me a few tries to try and characterize the person right.

I will probably end up being mostly a smut blog bc that’s what everyone wants but i’m still really interested in writing slice of life, fluff, or even angst (I am a sucker for happy endings though).

I’m more interested in na’vi x na’vi (or avatar) but I probably wouldn’t be opposed to na’vi x human every once and while. Just worried about portraying something like that accurately / safely possible anatomically.

I’m very interested in maybe world building the canon world of Avatar based on historical / anthropological facts I’m familiar with on Earth so ppl who request questions about life on Pandora or what living as a Na’vi is like for me to write about are getting a big kiss on the head

Important Rules

Ageless blogs and minors don’t interact with me i’ll block you lmao

I am comfortable with darker topics and kinks but I’m not interested in writing anything illegal or dangerous. Knife play, sure. Things like vore and shit? Absolutely not I will kink shame here. This is not a safe place.

Though i’m interested in the 2009 Avatar i will write for WOW characters as well

I’m begging y’all to not send me the same shit you send everyone else I see the same people asking for the same three scenarios

I put research into my fics so pls be patient with my postings, on top of that like I said I have an actual job I have to write for so be patient with my fried little brain

If you’re in my shit complaining about aged!up characters you are chronically online and you should go out and help real people who need it instead. You’re arguing over fictional 8 foot tall people from another planet that could rip your head off your shoulders with no effort- get a hobby. Even a cringy one like this is better than being that tone deaf.

[wolfprincesszola]

Porch Tears (Sanders Sides)

I'm not good at titles I know I'm sorry. i try to be lighthearted, but I thought it'd be nice to hear how much this story means to me as an author because i've always struggled voicing how my depression feels and I managed to accurately portray a part of it in here. everyone's version of depression looks different. i hope that anyone reading this that resonates with what logan and patton feel know that you are special and that these feelings do not define how to live your life <3

Masterlist ——————– Summary: After Logan has too much to drink, he goes outside to cry. Patton notices him outside on the porch and decides to ask him why he was crying and comfort him in his time of need.

Trigger Warnings: Talks of Depression, Anxiety, Loneliness

Content Warnings: Swearing, Drinking ——————–

Logan was sad. He was always sad. It would've been abnormal if he wasn't sad. What was abnormal though was being so sad that he was crying. He never cried. It was always numb. He didn't even know what had gotten him to feel the way he was feeling. Maybe it was the fact that he was drunk. Maybe it was the fact that he was at a party with all of his friends, and yet he felt really lonely. Maybe it was because despite everything he had tried, he saw how happy Patton was with all their friends and felt like he could've never been good enough for him. He was always so happy and he looks so beautiful that way. He looked like he never even needed Logan and that made Logan feel even more lonely.

Logan stopped crying after a few minutes. There was no point in crying over a silly admiration of his friend. Patton was just his friend, nothing else. Of course Patton wouldn't think more of him. Of course Patton wouldn't feel happy around him the way Patton did with the other people. Patton was Patton and Logan was just Logan.

Logan forced himself to wipe his tears and stop sniffling. He forced himself to ignore how much his heart hurt. He forced himself to ignore the pain and instead tried to smile.

Then, there it was. The familiar, cruel, cold numbness. At least it was something he could deal with because he knew how to. He had been doing it all his life.

Logan sighed, leaning against the doorway. The good thing about being forgotten was that he could sit outside for as long as he wanted to and no one would notice. He breathed in the outside air and convinced himself to be happy. He could fake a smile, even if it was for a couple more hours. He could do this.

Then, he heard the door open behind his back and Logan shifted so the person could get out onto the porch.

"Sorry." Logan's voice croaked. Dammit, why did it have to show now? Don't let anyone know that he was crying. He couldn't let them know. Everyone would come out asking him what was wrong, why he was crying. Logan didn't know how he could explain how lonely he always felt, even in a crowd packed with people. He didn't know how to explain how heavy his heart always was, even when he was smiling so hard that his cheeks hurt. He didn't know how to explain how even when he was around his friends happy, there was always a part of him that was sad and always would be. There were no words to describe the reasons behind his crying and behind his sadness because there was no way to describe the solitude prison he forced himself into.

"Logan? Is that you?" Patton's voice was laced with worry as he fully stepped out to see the man. His face melted into relief as he knelt down beside him. "I've been looking for you everywhere."

Logan couldn't explain how happy that made him feel, but how sad his heart was to know that all of Patton's concern was just a social cue. That maybe, his worry was only because Logan was a part of the mind, a part of his friends. Maybe, Patton was only worried, but not concerned because Logan wasn't special to him the way others were. He saw the way Patton loved others and Logan felt that maybe he wasn't worthy of getting that. Patton didn't treat him the same way he treated the others and when he did, Logan always managed to ruin it by pushing him away. God, everything was his fault all of the time all at once.

"Sorry, I stepped outside for some fresh air. Did you need me?" Logan forced a chuckle out.

"Not really. I was just worried." Patton spoke up, "I lost track of where you were and wanted to make sure you were okay. You said you wanted fresh air. Did you want me to leave?"

He didn't want Patton to leave him alone because with Patton around, he always managed to make the numbness a little more bearable. With Patton around, he could forget that he felt the way he felt. But Logan wanted to be alone in his thoughts. He wanted to sit in the numbness because he was sure he deserved it. There had to be a reason he felt that way, that he was punished with feeling this way for eternity.

"I don't know." Logan admitted.

"Alright then." Patton stood up, "I'll be back in a few minutes to check on you then, okay?"

Logan nodded and watched as he left. Then, the tears fell again. Logan didn't know why he was crying. Was it because Patton left him there? How pathetic of Logan.

Wiping tear after tear falling, he stood up, coughing and trying to stop sniffling. Walking down the porch, he stumbled towards the tree before coughing and trying to stop his sniffles.

"Shit!" Logan swore, wiping away his tears. This sight of display was almost pitiful, if it wasn't horrible to explain. "Fuck!"

Why was his life this way? Why did he always have to feel this way?

Logan stumbled back towards the porch once he had stopped his crying, sitting back on the porch.

There was a knock on the inside of the door before Patton stepped back out, holding two small ice packs individually wrapped in towels. He motioned to the spot next to Logan, asking if he could sit there. When Logan nodded numbly, he was quick to sit down, holding the ice packs for the man.

Logan raised an eyebrow as he took both of them. "What are these for?"

"Your eyes." Patton stated, "I heard they're good to keep the swelling down."

Logan was more confused now. "What?"

"For your crying."

Oh. He knew? Fuck, Logan was humiliated and mortified. How could he have let Patton see him like that? Would Patton call the rest of the mind to come and comfort him? He couldn't deal with that.

"I didn't know you knew." Logan mumbled.

Patton stared outside towards the garden that Roman and Virgil had started to plant in. "I'm not good at that sort of thing."

"What sort of thing?"

"Noticing, especially with people crying. I can't tell if someone's eyes are red or if they had just stopped sniffling. I can't tell if people are sad by their expressions. I can't catch the vibes of people and often I make a mess of situations because I don't understand what other people are feeling. I make people feel awful without knowing and I'm just overall bad at picking up cues for anything." Patton started before turning to Logan to cup the right side of his face and wipe his damp cheek away of any leftover tears, "But I'm not blind and I'm not deaf. I saw you huddled outside crying through the window. I heard you gasping so hard for breaths because you were crying so hard. And I want to tell you that I wish you didn't have to feel like you couldn't cry in front of me. Anyone in the mind even."

Great. Now he was crying again.

"What happened?" Patton asked, concern laced in his voice, "Why are you crying?"

"Just crying. Some people aren't built happy, you know?" Logan sniffled.

Patton gave a small laugh at that, "Yeah, I get that. And you know what? It's okay to feel like that. Come here."

He held his arms out and Logan took it, shifting to wrap his arms around Patton's waist, squeezing as tight as he possibly could. Patton held him in his arms tightly too, not letting go of the hug. God, Logan needed that. He didn't even know why.

"I feel lonely." Logan murmured, his face buried in the crook of Patton's neck. He choked back a sob as more tears streamed down his face. He was sure Patton's skin and clothes were stained with his tears, but Patton didn't comment about it, instead letting him cry it out.

"Oh, Logan. Everyone feels lonely. Hell, even I do. It's a normal thing. It's okay to feel lonely. I hope you know that in those times though, you'll always have me and the rest of the mind." Patton reassured him, petting the back of his hair. It was soothing.

Logan separated from the hug to look at Patton with his tear-streaked face, "You do? I didn't think anything fazed you. You're just so happy all the time."

"To be honest, I'm just as guilty of you of not really telling people when I'm sad, but it gets kinda easy not to talk to people about it when you're always sad. It's just easier to be happy because no one asks you why you're happy. They only ask you why you're sad." Patton admitted, "And maybe, as hard as it is to say it, it's easy to pretend that no one cares about you than try to explain this feeling within you about how you're always going to feel as if no one cares even if you know you're someone's entire world."

Logan didn't know if he was glad that Patton understood what he was feeling, or if he was upset that he understood. As he looked at Patton still smiling through what he presumed was a similar numbness to the one he experienced every day, he wihed that Patton didn't have to suffer with him.

"I wish you didn't understand. Then you wouldn't have to pretend to be happy. I wish I could take away all the pain from you, so only I would have to feel it." Logan spoke.

"That's very kind of you, Logan." Patton let out a laugh, "But it's okay. I think it'd be harder for me to be able to talk to you if I didn't understand."

"How do you deal with it?" Logan's voice was hoarse again. He had stopped sobbing by this point. He had stopped sniffling and hiccuping. He had stopped choking on his tears. Instead, now silent tears were the only thing streaming down his face. "It hurts so much."

"It does." Patton admitted, "But people like you make it better. You see, the problem with my mind is that it's whirling all the time at a thousand miles per hour, yelling at me with all sorts of thoughts. But then I'm around you and the thoughts quiet and suddenly, the numbness doesn't feel so noticable. My heart feels less heavy when I'm around you."

"You mean around the mind. Not me."

"No, I mean you." Patton admitted, "I care about you a lot more than you realize. The other members of the mind help calm my mind in different ways, but you're just as special as the rest of them. I hope you remember that."

Logan's heart warmed at what he said and suddenly, it was like the fog of darkness had cleared. His heart didn't feel so heavy and his numbness had cleared. His sadness had lifted and Logan felt okay for the first time in a long time.

Patton sighed, tsking as he saw the untouched warm ice packs, "Looks like I'm going to have to get more of those. I'll be back in a little bit."

"No, you don't have to." Logan stumbled on his words. "It's okay."

"I want to." Patton wiped the remaining tears from Logan's face before standing up. "Give me one minute."

He was back with new ice packs wrapped in new undamp towels before he sat down next to Logan and held them against his eyes.

Logan sighed in defeat as he let the coldness of the ice packs infect the warmness of his eyes and cheeks after having cried for a long time.

"You can go back in if you want to. I know it's not really fun sitting outside with a sad drunk."

"It's always fun when I'm with you, Logan. Don't you worry at all." Patton hummed.

Logan hoped that the ice pack was covering his flush and the tears that were starting to fall from his eyes. God, it was starting to get old. there was no reason for him to cry over him realizing that maybe all of his thoughts were just thoughts and that the truth was really in front of him all along.

"Are you crying again?" Patton giggled at Logan.

"Shut up!" Logan let out a laugh, playfully nudging his shoulder that was touching his. "I'm in a completely vulnerable spot right now!"

"Seriously though, Logan. I really hope that you never feel the need to hide the fact that you're crying from me ever again."

"...thanks, Patton."

That was all he could say. Those were all the words he could even think that would fathom to express how much Patton meant to him.

[riko0youth]

plz no hate also,don't justify,you could hardly change my opinion even if its wrong

Since i started shipping Kaishin i always restored to translated DJs and Fanart to feed it, whenever i thought of reading fanfic i simply felt repulsive, that it won't taste good, and boy was i right, i understood the reasons very clearly, but yesterday, due to accumulation of a few reasons , i caved and tried it , and now i need heaps of DJs and Fanart mouthwash to forget this taste.

no offense intended, the writing style of authors is actually super good, the plot is very entertaining, overall a good well written fic, but it just not my thing, simply because the western eyes(and i don't mean ppl living in the west, im talking abt the ideology itself, wherever they're from) and mine don't match, they don't see or understand the characters as i do, and same for me, i fail to see and understand most stuff they way they do, so simply, me and the anime fics, we can't mix, i can have some tolerance for stuff like bkdk , but a classic literally older than me DCMK is out of question, how they portray the characters and take them out of context, while its good and fun...its just not them so its pointless for me to read fics abt absolute strangers, i would rather go through my kaishin pins twice than read smth while i enjoy it, gives me a foul taste (i guess that's what alcohol drinking is like for people, yeah, its good that i don't and won't drink ever in my life)

also, if you don't know, i merely write for the sake of journaling, this post is not meant to criticize anyone, especially not the hard working authors, simply my pov that most won't agree on.

I am not trying to defend myself saying this, but i am merely stating how my mindset came to be, first, my childhood, pre-teen years, and the first quarter of my teens were spent watching Anime, and the rest of my teens was spent reading manga/hua/hwa and Danmeis , that's it, no friends, no social media, no way to understand how my peers from any part of the world thing, only how the Japanese, Chinese and sometimes Korean ''Characters" live, like and think, so ya, very very low tolerance, when i unfortunately started opening up to the "world" it was merely to look for more resources for a good read, my mindset was already set by then and i felt like an alien (still do, but meh that's me) among everyone else, and more often than not i feel super uncomfortable from a comment with a mindset that's just so foreign to me it feels sickening (im not exaggerating)

so ya, lgptq+ , most of the relationship 'cues', ideas of (in my weak pov seems extreme) individuality in romance ,etc etc, they are all things i am not very fond of, cuz my mind is attached to a more simple process, watching ppl be in love ,period.

oh ya and the concept of incent, which i find hilarious but that's just horrible of me, incent is wrong for two reasons, ethically, you can't marry your sibling because they're your sibling sharing the same blood of at least one of your parents and that is sooo wrong (im not too far gone to think on even such a thing) but speaking ethically , for me a sibling is diffrent from a COUSIN they don't share your blood, their blood is just closer to yours from a stranger, they are not the children of your own parents, so, i just find it pointless to be so hung up on it, i could marry a cousin and only discover they're my cousin after we've had kids and lives happy stable lives, should i just destroy all that and make my children live in agony cuz someone somewhere sometime decided that marrying the cousin is same as marrying an SIBLING and even giving it the same label? of course , another point ,which is actually, speaking abt cousins, more serious , is Genetically speaking you can't mix DNAs too similar because it increase the risk of genetic mutations and disabilities in offspring, but the risk is always there, so its *unadvised* at most to marry a cousin if you are planning to have kids, but that's it, and everyone is free to choose between marrying the one they want and increasing their chance of healthy children, so its absolutely *hilarious* for me to be so hung up on "incent" between 2 MALE COUSINS , like really, *where are you even coming from?* (and yes im talking abt what you have in mind , as i said, i started kaishin fanfics just yesterday which is apparently the worst possible timing since the whole M24 trailer fiasco or whatever it is that's bothering them and got swarmed with confusing tags that just made me lose my appetite and feel vaguely uncomfortable, and "what's the big deal?" confused)

ofc as a person opening up to the world the first thing i did was to try to fit in, it wasn't wholly unpleasant ofc, i got some of the dearest ships to my heart that sometimes support me post-breakdown, but i tried to think like others, only to discover its futile, i can guess how others would think , but im mostly unconvinced by it or don't feel like agreeing to it, and that just works to make it easy for me to gain enemies and unpleasant impressions, so i mostly lay off commenting my opinions since its as foreign to them as theirs are to me , and im not so free or sinister to make others feel unpleasant on purpose, ofc no one is perfect so i slip from time to time when my battery (i call it LXC battery of patience cuz that's what i think of portraying when im controlling myself from commenting and arguing, using LXC as a role model to extend the Battery's life) and as expected those slips catch fire , i also mostly use the method of burning letters, except i don't burn them , i have a very short memory span on most thing, so i write it, say i will post it later, and the when i see the draft i don't remember if i did post it or not , and it would be very stupid to post the same thing twice, also im not so attentive to open a site or an app specifically to check, i would rather spend that time reading

Most of the time i didn't understand why the "western" ppl make a big deal out of everything and are so hung up on realism , i still don't but i could get one thing, and ironically im the living proof of that one thing, that is, most people's mindset is affected by what they are exposed to, aka, what they read, see, or hear, so if something say like intentional harm like pushing people off the stairs and people always survive, if crazy troupe like that spiral into normality smh, and someone ALWAYS read it and always seeing it, them it won't be that hard to apply in real life, so the westerns are just looking out for others, or less selflessly, like every human, are trying to convince others of their opinion.

ofc in my case, which i don't know if its an exception or there are many others like me (again, i don't socialize) that help is absolutely unnecessary, since everything i read see or hear are for me strictly fictional, I won't fall in love with a minor as much as i won't fly off on a dragon, for me they're all fiction, love, itself , is something fictional i don't expect to see in the real world, that's why i love reading it the most, for me what i read is what can't be found in my reality like dragons, travelling to other worlds, falling in love at first sight, forbidden love etc, so its no surprise i feel unpleasant when some person out there try to stain my "world" with realism after i always painstakingly separated them anyways bye.