#but the last two days my guest kudos blew up?

[emilykaldwen]

Nooooo I have been hit with the kudos bot on AO3 (where your kudos go up but your hits don't???).

So use this as a reminder to donate to AO3! Getting them funding means they can get more people working behind the scenes to sort through the backlog of bugs and issues they've been working (which is why the site is marked as being in beta)

[wickednerdery]

Title: Out of Time: Time Out Author: @wickednerdery Fandom: Marvel Pairing/character: Loki x Stark!OC, Steve Rogers Rating: FRT Summary: “I am Loki, of Asgard.” Notes: Continuing my strange little foray into cyberpunk with Loki on a futuristic Earth (after his escapes with the Tesseract in Endgame?). This one has a bit more cursing, drinking, and original characters...and a cameo by one Captain America!

Chapter 1

Loki stays with her right up until there are boots pounding their way to the exhibit, then vanishes from human sight. He watches security rush in and spread out to secure the room, including some breaking off to investigate the hole made by the shooter’s body. He takes note of the one who takes his place at Ms Stark’s side.

“Ana?” The gentleman is older, most certainly the one in charge, as he crouches and tears the dress at the wound. “Get the fucking medics in here now!” He pulls a pen from his inner pocket and slips one end into her wound. She whimpers, then gasps. “Shhh, it’s okay, it’s me. It’s Orson. Just checking for toxins.”

“F-Fuuuck…” Her teeth grit hard, her breath a hiss as he pulls bloodied pen back out to read. She pants, her eyes darting for the mystery man in black. “Wh-where i-is…” Her head of security again encourages her to stay calm. “…The man…Where?”

Orson sighs in relief, no toxins detected. “Don’t worry, we’ll get him. Medi-!” He’s cut off as they arrive, switches to answering questions and reminding them exactly how important she is.

A medic stretches pale flesh-colored tape across her wound as another unfolds a sheet that hardens into a flat stretcher. Loki watches with interest as it hovers after she’s placed on it. It floats out, leaving the medics free to attend to Ana as security escorts them towards an emergency back exit window. He hears the helicopter, but doesn’t bother to go watch her loaded into it. Instead he teleports himself into the crowd now being forced to exit, remaining unseeable to take in the scene unbothered.

Ana’s eyes open to a white ceiling dotted with black, red, and gold. Her ceiling. “Status report?”

“Yeah, you’ll be fine,” says Tony in his usual laissez faire. “The bullet went through and through without caustic or explosive damage. Stem cell injection patched up the insides, skin patch worked for the aesthetics.”

“How long was I out?”

“Two days out at the hospitals, three days in and out at home.”

“Is the data from that night filed?”

“Filed, examined, and filed again.”

“Examined by who?”

“I’ll give you one guess - wait, it’s not me - now I’ll give you one guess.”

She knows. “Is he here?”

“Not at the moment. Want me to ring him up?”

“Fuck, no. Am I mobile?”

“Vitals say yes, but I’d take it slow.”

For all intents and purposes, her head of security aside, Tony is all she has. Her parents died in the last outbreak, she’s no siblings. What little extended family left were too busy bickering over the Stark name and fortune to make nice. And the Avengers? They were little more than a fairy tale, a myth, now. It was just her and her innovations.

She lifts camisole to examine her midsection, pulls off the now clear patch to see underneath. The skin came in well, smooth, with perfect tone match. Deep breath in, then out, with minimal pain overall. She reaches for the med pack and tears off a square to pop in her mouth. The analgesic spreads warm across her body as it dissolves. She smiles, gets up slow and ensures she’s stable, then prepares for the day.

Up on the rigging his eyes stay on the man below. So this is what passes for a knowledgeable man these days? Hardly impressive, even (or especially) with the women swarming him. Loki watches carefully as each in turn chat, some getting tabs or a tap of the wrist with his, while others leave with no contact only for the man to swipe and type a handheld glass panel after. A dealer of some sort. The god waits for him to be alone, then slips down into the bright, grubby, streets of this new Midgard. He’s surprised, impressed, when the other clocks him within four feet.

“No new clients, pal, sorry.” Cyno slips phone into backpack, then swings the mass over his shoulder.

Loki grins in confidence of his skills. “I urge you to reconsider.”

The man seems entranced before blinking the charm away. “Yeah, no. Nice try though. Haven’t had that chem mix in me before. Strong stuff, kudos to you and yours.”

The god is stunned, then enraged. “You will help me, mortal!”

Cyno gauges the other’s seriousness, then laughs. “Man desperate as you…I expect high and constant pay.”

“Then you shall have it.” Loki can’t be unreasonable, not right now.

“And what do you want?”

“I want information on Ms Ana Roget Stark.”

“Do I look like an IronMan to you? I know what everyone knows. Genius, zillionare, party girl, philanthropist.”

“Surely there must be more to her than that.” Nobody gains such a skilled assassin without cause.

“Like I said, I’m not an IronMan, I don’t know what happens behind the golden screen.” Cyno watches the other’s brows rise expectantly and sighs. “Stark International controls security for most of the world. Every aspect of surveillance, whether you see it or not, is theirs. These days Ana is the head of the family and the company, but that’s always being contested by an extended family member or business rival.”

“...Go on...”

“The rest is rumor. Secret labs making mutate super-soldiers, mutant-android experimentation camps, inter-universal trade. Hell, there’s even one of a first generation Captain America module she plays when lonely. Impossible to say what’s bullshit and what’s fact.”

The information was as intriguing as it was irritating. “Yes, well…surely you can find ways to dig through the gossip for the golden nugget.”

“What?” This guy spoke a different language to Cyno. “Who the fuck are you, anyway?”

“I am Loki, of Asgard.”

Cyno smirks, snorts. “An anarchist. Figures.” He sighs. “Well, look, Loki of Asgard, you got the credits I’ll get what I can as far as facts, but no promises. I’m no IronMan and I ain’t risking my life playing one so you can virus the Stark woman on the dark net or whatever the fuck you’re planning.”

Loki’s smile spreads slow and malicious. “Leave what’s done with the information to me, you just get it.”

“Fine, meet me at Kibishī Ākēdo Ten at 23:30 tonight. Go to the bar, order the house cider, and wait in the back. I’ll be there first.” He always is. “You pay me two-thousand and I give you a sample of information. If you like it, we can set up...a subscription, if you will.”

“I require a guide for this world, can you procure one for me?” He will not make the same mistake as in New York. He will understand this new Midgard far better than the old one before making any moves.

“Male or female or....?”

“It hardly matters.”

“You wanna be able to play?”

“Beg pardon?”

“Fuck it, guy. You wanna be able to fuck it?”

“Did I ask for a whore?”

Cyno sighs. “I’ll get you an open one, help you set it up.”

“Now.”

“Yeah, now, com’on.” Cyno shifts bag fully onto his back and heads down the street, leaving Loki to follow.

“Display layout, with guests, at the opening of the museum gala. Pull up all bios available.” Ana heads towards her main room, throwing hair up into a bun. She’s showered, dressed, but still sore, too high for the lab. Today will be a regroup and review day - she’ll go through each guest until she finds the man in black. As the hologram of the charity event populates stats on all guests she heads towards the bar of the open kitchen.

“Don’t you think you should slow down on that?” His voice is gruffly calm. “At least while still doped.”

She turns to see her head of security, in the flesh. “Tony said you weren’t here.”

“I lied,” her AI confesses without guilt.

“I made you too smart.” Ana sighs, carrying on with her plans. “And I can drink whenever I damn well please, Orson, so just move on.”

He remembers Tony like this too - stubborn, defeated, ready to slip back into the bottle - but pushes on. Now was not the time for a lecture. “We found the shooter. Dead. Blasted through the wall.”

“Who was he? Was he part of a group or lone nut?”

“Mac Headstrom, part of the Altered Brotherhood.”

“Which ones are they?” There are too many to even bother to keep track of.

“The same ones that blew our labs in Costa Rica, think we’re making an army of mutants out of the homeless.”

“Ah.”

“You didn’t tell me you rigged a charge to your ring, Ana.”

“I didn’t, I only had the taser.” She pours out liquor, ignores Orson’s sigh as she drops another analgesic strip into it for good measure. “It was the man in black. The guest.”

“The guest in black?”

The sweet rush of numbness almost causes her to moan. “Yeah. Got in via one of the golden ticket invites, but didn’t seem to understand that himself. Didn’t seem to understand much, actually. Weird thing was…” She grabs a slice of cold pizza. “I thought he used a hologram to contact me the second time, but he…he caught me.”

“Caught you?”

“After I was shot. I was going down and he was able to catch me.”

“So he actually teleported?”

“Apparently.” She stays standing at the counter, unwilling to walk away from the bottle or take it with her into the living room. “But his tech knowledge seemed nonexistent. How does a guy not even know he’s got a codes tab, but then be able to navigate teleportation?”

Orson hesitates, then proceeds. “Maybe he’s a mutant?”

“I thought most of your kind died out with the Legacy Virus.” Not the same as the one that took her parents, but just as devastating.

“Most did. But not all.”

“If I might cut in,” says Tony. He reddens one of the people in the hologram of the party, pulls aside an enlarged image of the man. “But if this is him, he’s not a mutant.”

“That’s him, yeah.” Ana pours another drink, finally coming around the counter to sit. As she does, her chair adjusts for her comfort. “You already ran checks on him?”

“He’s a core file in my coding from the original Tony.”

“Loki.” Orson sighs, jaw clenching with a tension that Ana rarely sees from him. “Adopted brother of Thor Odinson, from Asgard. Basically a god. Iron Man fought him with the rest of the Avengers when he attacked New York City in early 2010s.”

“The Chitauri thing?”

“Yeah, the Chitauri thing.”

“So an intergalactic terrorist god…” She sips. “Came from the past.” Holds up a finger when Orson threatens to speaks. “To save the descendant of his enemy?” Her finger stays up until her drink is downed.

“Ana -”

“No, no. I’m sorry, I’m not nearly sober nor drunk enough to unpack all that just now.” She waves the hologram away and gets up. “And I’m not up for the ‘shit I did wrong’ security debriefing either.”

“Ana.” Orson pleads, for what he’s not sure.

“So, you don’t have to go home…” She heads back towards the bar. “But you do have to get the fuck out. Right now.”

The man’s eyes go to the ceiling, the cameras in the black dots. Nothing. Not a peep from Tony. “Fine, I’ll check in on you later.” He stands with a sigh. “But you better not be half-in-the-bag then.”

“Half in the bag?” She smirks, he uses such old-timey turns of phrases sometimes.

“I want you clean and sober before I return.”

“Can’t be that until you actually leave.” The liquor and pain meds cause her to happily slur her words. She follows him all the way to the elevator with goodbyes, watches until his car exits the property, then goes to pour another. “Tony?”

“Yep?”

“Activate Captain Comfort.” If a disembodied AI computer program could roll its eyes, Tony did. “Have him waiting.” Ana finishes her latest glass, sets it in the sink, and heads back to her room. She doesn’t want to think about the crazed assassin, the terrorist organization he was part of, the time-traveling god, the security upgrades Orson’s no doubt already planning, or anything else. She doesn’t want to think at all. “Captain?” She calls out, already letting her hair back down.

“Ma’am?” He steps out of the bathroom clean and clean-shaven. He’s tall, well-built, with broad shoulders and ramrod posture.

She smiles. “Call me Ana.”

The phrase triggers his softer expression, going from stern soldier to caring man. “Ana, are you all right?”

“Comfort me.” She relaxes into his arms easily, smiling at the warmth and sense of care he provides. “Kiss me.”

He does, passionately, and she returns it in kind.

Sorry, I couldn’t help but make the rumor about Ana having a Captain America pleasure-bot true, LMAO!! (I may write a separate, smut, piece of their full interaction, lol!) If you’re wondering why Loki’s mind control didn’t work on Cyno it’s because - using a magic-as-science type concept here - he’s got a way to clear out drugs/toxins/chemicals from his body (I confess, I’ve no specifics beyond that just yet, sorry, lol!) and that includes what Loki’s magical charms can do to one’s brain chemistry. ALSO...Orson (Ben Mendelsohn faceclaim) is an OC from another series (not on my masterlist yet oops). He’s a mutant with super-strength who’s impervious to damage, illness, and (for the most part) aging...he also lacks touch sensation for the most part. Ana’s faceclain is Evan Rachel Wood. Cyno’s faceclaim is Ryan Gosling and you’ll find out more about him as we go, lol! ;-)

Still/Always playing with this one, feel free to share ideas/thoughts/suggestions!! 😉

Tagging: @lady-crowned-with-stars​​, @beccaliciooouuusss​, gravitational-anomaly, @fuckthatfeeling​, @v-2bucky​, @ultrarebelheart​​, @tarithenurse​​ @latent-thoughts​​ @chibiyanai​​ @lukeevansandjdmobession​​ @sweetfictionalworld​​ @ladyfluff​​ @theangelsfightwithdevils​​ @holykryptonitekitten​​ @kpopgirlbtssvt​​ …And I legit don’t know who else to tag anymore lol

Gifs made off ones I found on Google, then combined myself.

[aint-no-baby-mama-drama]

Kolvina prompt fill

Basic Prompt: Kolvina- Include these phrases- "Come back with me" & "I can't stand my own reflection" & "You don't mean anything to me".

(Also, huge Kudos to my Beta, @bonkaiqueen . You are THE best)

Kol moved slowly up the steps, avoiding the familiar spots that he knew would creak, and wiped his hands across the legs of his jeans as he neared the bedroom. Taking a deep breath to steady himself, he pressed the pads of his fingers against the wood, pushing open the unlocked door and stepping in. The fan in the corner of the room was set on high simply for the sound. It was something that he had had to adjust to once they got together, the sound of the fan while they slept, but the past few days it had been miserable to sleep without it. There was an oil diffuser on the nightstand, that was currently casting a soft green light throughout the room.

Kol walked slowly, careful not to drag his feet as he approached the bed in the center of the room. Davina was asleep, which was a given considering the time. She shifted slightly in the bed, moving her hand up to just under her chin as she continued to slumber. He squatted by her side of the bed, steadying his breath as he observed her. She looked peaceful and well rested. Which was such a contrast from the last time he had seen her, with tears streaming down her face as she screamed in his direction, demanding that he leave immediately. He swallowed hard at the memory, rested his elbows on his thighs to maintain his balance, and tried to decide what he was doing there and why he had come. The light from the diffuser changed to the next color and a blue glow radiated across the room.

It all boiled down to her, he needed to see her. Davina had been smart enough after the first day to block his number when it became obvious that he wasn't going to respect her wishes and stop trying to call and text. The five days since he had last laid eyes on her had been torture.

Kol stood, moving around the bed to the dresser, pausing in front of it as he reached out, gently lifting the gold framed photo and letting a small smile touch his lips. It was one of the only wedding photos they had, and it was taken from Rebekah's cell phone. They had a professional photographer, but all of the photos had been lost when the rain started pouring. The report that Davina had obsessed over all but promised clear weather, but about halfway through the reception the clouds rolled in and the skies opened up. Kol shut his eyes as the memory flooded in.

Davina's mouth popped open as the first drop of rain hit against her bare shoulder. Her head whipped to the left as she searched for Kol, irritation filling her as a few more drops fell down. The day had been perfect so far, the wedding was held at a small plantation on the edge of New Orleans. It was an intimate gathering that reflected nothing but peace and love.

But now a sense of panic filled the air as the guests all stilled. Everyone had their eyes to the sky. Within moments, a clap of thunder erupted and the rain began pouring from the clouds in bucketfuls. The dance floor cleared quickly as everyone moved to get out of the rain. Davina just stood in the center, a smile stretching her lips as the irony of it all hit her. Kol appeared in front of her, a smile on his face as he took her hand.

"May I have this dance, Mrs. Mikaelson?" he asked. She nodded once and stepped closer to him, the smile never leaving her face. And they began dancing, to no music, as the world around them bustled to get out of the rain. Once the rain had soaked every inch of fabric on either of them, Davina pulled away and slid her fingers into his.

"Come here," she requested, tugging him past the chairs and towards the enclosed porch. They were both soaked and laughing with each other as the final step up brought them under the cover from the porch. She turned to Kol, grinning ear to ear as water dripped down her bare shoulders and grabbed his cheeks, sliding to her tiptoes to press her lips against his. Rebekah snapped the photo at that moment, capturing the rain in the background and the love in the air.

Kol opened his eyes, holding the photograph a few moments longer before setting it back in its place on the dresser and turning to face the bed. He stood by the end of the bed for what felt like an hour as he watched her sleep, trying to figure out where it had all went wrong. It was his fault, he knew that. He always knew she was too good for him and had been waiting since day one to mess up bad enough that she wouldn't love him anymore. And when the day came, he couldn't have even acted like he didn't expect it.

Kol stayed quiet in the living room while his wife moved around the kitchen, the house silent aside from the occasional opening of the refrigerator and beeping of the oven. He was on edge, gently tapping his fingers on the edge of the couch. He knew the fight was coming, in fact he could almost predict how it would all go down.

It was one they'd already had countless times in the last three years of their marriage. Children.

Davina wanted them badly. She had always seen herself being a mother, barefoot and pregnant on the porch with a few dogs. The ultimate down-home dream. At first she had pushed him to consider letting them look into a sperm donor, which she quickly dropped because it was a big deal to him that she wouldn't be pregnant with some other man's child. But then when she brought up adoption, he was just as quick to push it to the side, claiming every excuse in the book. And the fights progressively had gotten worse. They got louder, they lasted longer, and the aftermath was torture. She had begun to go literal days without actually speaking to him. And he had no idea how to handle it.

Earlier that morning, they stood in line for coffee and a small child in front of them kept turning in his mother's arms to face them. Davina had smiled and gone out of her way to make faces for the child, to make him laugh and pass the grueling time waiting in line. The child's mother had noticed and began to make small talk, even offering to let Davina hold the child. She had, eagerly, and blew raspberries on his cheeks until he giggled.

Then the mother had asked if they had children and the familiar stone face Davina put on appeared. Kol knew the fight would come again that day. And it had, as soon as they left the shop and he began talking to her she closed up. The entire day she was silent and was now preparing dinner in the kitchen. Leaving Kol to fester in the living room, waiting for the storm to hit. And hit it did.

Halfway through dinner he was fed up with the silence.

"So how long are you planning to be mad at me this time?" he snapped, the guilt for the venom he heard in his voice rushing him immediately. She jolted up from the table with fire in her eyes and that's how it had started. The fight escalated until they were screaming across the room at each other.

"Just let the damn kid thing go, Davina!" he shouted, slamming his fists down against the table. She jumped at the splintering sound accompanying the bang.

"You just don't get it," Davina sobbed, raking her sleeves over her face to catch the tears as they escaped her eyes. "We are too different, we want different things. The Kol I married was rational, the Kol I married loved me and wanted a future with me. But you?" She paused a moment, sniffling, her body tense. "You aren't him. You don't mean anything to me. You need to get out, now."

He had looked at her in disbelief. She simply pointed to the door, her hand visibly shaking. "And don't bother calling me when you realize what you've done. We need some time apart and I think we are done," she finished.

Kol turned and stalked out, slamming the door so hard behind him he heard the wood crack on impact.

That was the last time they spoke to one another, almost a full 12 hours later, Kol had cooled off enough and regretted everything. But he couldn't do or say anything to elicit a response from Davina and eventually she blocked his number so he couldn't even try to contact her. After two full days of trying to catch her at the house he gave up, deciding he just needed to give her the time she needed. But the more time that went on, the more he was afraid that they really were done. He made it four whole days without her, and then hit his breaking point about halfway through number five.

Kol shuffled over to her side of the bed, wanting one last look at her before he left. He wasn't exactly sure where he would go, but knew that anywhere else would be better than this town. Biting the inside of his cheek as he watched her sleep, he fought the urge to reach out and move the dark curls from her face so he could see it fully. Eventually he caved and bent by the bed, reaching out and allowing his finger to brush across her face and tuck the hair back. Her soft skin enticed him and Kol gently rested his fingers against her cheek. Two steadying breaths passed and her eyes blinked open wide, surprise crossed with fear as her hand flew out and he found himself flying backwards across the room from some whispered incantation.

She swung her legs out of the bed and sat up as he scrambled back to a standing position. They stared at each other, the room thick with silence for a few moments before she spoke.

"Why are you here, Kol?" she asked, a sliver of guilt running through her as she thought about how hard he had just cracked his head. "The whole point of 'I need some time to breathe' means just what it sounds like. I need some time to breathe without you." She crossed her arms over her chest as she directed her eyes anywhere but into his.

"Davina..." Kol's voice was a whisper. "Please look at me. Please, darling." He stepped closer to her and dropped down to his knees in front of her, meeting her eyes for a brief moment before she looked away. He rested back on his calves and gently brushed his fingers against her thighs, looking up to her face. "I'm sorry," he murmured, voice soft and cracking with emotion. Davina swallowed hard and willed herself to look forward, refusing to let him see how close she was to crying.

"I do want the same things as you." He told her, moving closer so her knees were against his chest.

"No. you don't." She shook her head and finally shifted her eyes to meet his. Three heartbeats passed before either said anything and tears began streaming down Davina's face. Kol nodded his head and reached forward quickly, swiping the tears from her cheeks and leaving his hands there as he spoke.

"I do, I do want the same things. I do want children with you, I do want a bigger house we can fill with children. I just..." He paused for a moment, looking away from her eyes as he dropped his hands from her face and onto the bed on either side of her. "I'm not good enough, Davina...I'm not even good enough for you but somehow I got you to marry me. I can't stand my own reflection lately." He shook his head, his last sentence bitter, and a silence took over the room for a few minutes as both processed what he had just said.

"All of this is because you think you're a bad guy?" Her voice was soft as she spoke, and laced with a doubtful tone.

Kol merely stared at the ground. She reached down and cupped her hands on his cheeks, tilting his head up so he was looking at her. "Do you really think you're that bad?" she asked. He nodded almost instantly, avoiding her eye contact. Davina felt the tears threaten to fall from her face again. She really loved this man, this beautiful and self loathing man.

"Kol, look at me" she said, her voice trembling with emotion. A beat passed and he turned, locking his eyes with hers. "You are not a bad guy anymore. You're a good guy. You're the kind of guy who loves me and cares about me. You're the kind of guy I really don't deserve." She stroked her thumbs along his face.

Kol's eyes began to sting.

"Kol Mikaelson, I married you knowing your flaws and downfalls, and I love you despite them. That's what marriage is, it's a give and take, and...I'm sorry." She paused a moment. "I shouldn't have kicked you out just because we fought. Come back with me?"

Kol shook his head, breaking free from her grasp. "No, I'm the one who should be sorry. I didn't need to get that angry with you. I could have just given you my reasons and talked it through instead of dodging the subject."

Davina pushed away from her spot on the bed and crawled into Kol's lap on the floor. He wrapped his arms around her and sat on his bottom fully. The couple sat in silence a few moments and Kol began to wonder if Davina had dozed back off before she pulled away from his chest and put her hands back on his face, cradling it as she pressed their lips together. Kol returned the kiss, gently grabbing the back of her head to hold her in place, fingers tangling in the soft curls there.

An hour later found them both in the bed, a thin sheet of sweat covering their bodies as they rested in the aftermath of the best make up sex. Davina rested her head against Kol's chest and listened to the steady beat of his heart as it slowed back to a normal pace.

"I love you, Davina Mikaelson" He whispered. She turned her head to press a soft kiss against his chest.

"And I love you, Kol Mikaelson" Davina responded, curling herself into his side. A few moments passed in silence as Kol lifted a hand, gently moving it across Davina's hair and her eyes drifted shut.

"So... kids?" he asked. Davina hummed a bit and cuddled herself in closer.

"Hmm...sleep first," she murmured after a pause, content to stay in his arms for as long as possible.

[drrubberfunk]

Earlier in the year I was asked to contribute to the excellent ‘Dusk Dubs’ mixtape series, and jumped at the chance. They have a nice format of asking guests to provide music that has a special place in their memories and in their souls - ‘...music that moves them, that invokes images of sunrises, sunsets, good times and good people’. 

I thought it’d be a nice way to compliment the other ‘My Life At 45′ themed mixes that I’ve done this year, with a selection of music you’d be likely to hear playing at my house over the last 30+ years, with tracks featured in full, mixed end to end, and a little story to go with each track. 

Here’s the full tracklisting, and photos of some of my well-loved vinyl that the tracks were recorded from - hope you enjoy this laid-back late summer stroll through my record collection, and My Life At 45!

1) Peddlers - ‘Whole Lot Of Sunlight’, from the 1970 Philips LP ‘Three For All’.

I picked this up in Avid Records in Oxford in the late nineties, I got a lot of good stuff from them around that time, picking up cheap classic soul, blues and jazz LPs, bargain priced late ‘80s / early ‘90s 12” singles that I’d missed the first time round and just taking a punt on interesting looking sleeves, or bands I’d heard about in sampling cirlces. ‘Suite London’ was the hot crate digger’s favourite from The Peddlers, but the production on ‘Three For All’ is right up my street, with wonderful hammond playing and a killer drum sound. It’s a great album from start to finish. I’ve used tracks on a few mixtapes in the past 20 years, but not this particular one, and with an apt title, it seemed like ‘Whole Lot Of Sunlight' was a nice way to kick off my late summer Dusk Dubs selection!

2) Joe McDuphrey Experience - ‘Solar Waves’, from the 2002 Stones Throw 12” ‘Experience EP’.

Madlib made a big impression on me when I first started producing with a sampler and a second hand Hohner Pianet. I really enjoyed this era when he was mixing live instrumentation with the straight up MPC sample business. ‘Solar Waves’ has it all - lolloping drums, wonky synths and tasty electric piano - a super laid-back groove, and is one I rediscovered in my collection recently. Plus, I’m a sucker for coming up with a bunch of aliases to cover all the roles you might play on a record - Madlib is the undisputed champ at that.

3) Paul Weller - ‘That Spiritual Feeling’ (New Mix) from the 1993 Go! Discs promo 12” GOXDJ 102.

My first proper music industry job in the mid nineties was as a radio plugger, and we shared an office building with Go!Discs - home at the time to Portishead, David Holmes, The Beautiful South and Paul Weller, amongst others. There was a little shared kitchen area with a photocopier, and I was busily copying press releases one afternoon on about my 3rd day in the job, when I heard someone making a drink behind me. Turning round I was confronted by Mr Paul Weller himself, impeccably dressed (with an AMAZING tan) stirring his cup of tea. ‘Hello’ he said, ‘I’m Paul - nice to meet you’.

I managed not to swoon or drop my photocopying and introduced myself as the new boy. I worked on radio promo with him across various album projects for the next 4 years, culminating with a week on a tour bus with Paul and his crew doing sessions at radio stations across the country. Story for another time maybe … Anyway - also in that little kitchen area at Go! Discs was their stock cupboard, which I rinsed for releases I’d missed in the years prior to my starting work there. ‘That Spiritual Feeling’ was originally on his first solo release ‘Into Tomorrow’ in 1991, but got remixed and added to this promo, as well as appearing on the ‘Sunflower’ 12” (taken from ‘Wildwood’) It’s got the instantly recognisable JBs on it, with a classic horn arrangement backing up a kinda hypnotic 2 chord groove that just rolls and rolls. I can listen to it for hours.

4). Rhianna - ‘Word Love’ (4 Hero Soul Mix) from the 2002 Sony Soho Square promo 7” XPR 3600.

4 Hero were killing it in the early ‘00s as their productions evolved from the breakbeat mastery of the ‘90s into the wonderfully orchestrated arrangements that saw them covering ‘Les Fleur’, and bringing their deft touch to an increasing number of quality remixes. I don’t think this version of British soul star Rhianna’s ‘Word Love’ - which I loved in it’s original form - ever made it to a commercial release, but it’s something I’ve played out a lot over the years, and it always gets great comments and a bunch of info requests from the crowd.

5) GangStarr - ‘Jazz Thing’ (Instrumental Mix) from the 1990 CBS promo 12” XPR 1571.

I saw Mo Better Blues at the cinema in Australia in November 1990 and bought the soundtrack on cassette the next day. Brandford Marsalis and Terence Blanchard have a superb dialogue across all the tracks, especially on the Canonball Adderley-esque title track. However, Gang Starr’s ‘Jazz Thing’ blew my tiny teenage mind, and I became a bit obsessed with it over the next few years, the samples, the cuts, the live loops - especially after my new college mate Pete made me a tape a year or so later with two extra versions from the 12”, including this, the Instrumental Mix. I finally tracked down my own copy of this import promo in the Soul & Dance Exchange in Notting Hill in the late nineties, and it’s lived in my record bag pretty much ever since.

6) John Mayall’s Bluesbreakers with Peter Green - ‘Greeny’, from the 1969 Decca LP ‘The World Of Blues Power’.

Everyone my sort of age with some records is bound to have one or two liberated from their parent’s collection, and this was an album I discovered in my folks collection in about 1987, not long after buying a drum kit. I’d been rinsing their Beatles albums since I was a kid - singing along to ‘Drive My Car’ and ‘Octopus’s Garden’, but the World Of Blues Power seem a bit of alien concept until I gave it a good listen as a teen. There’s some classic pyrotechnic stuff from rising Brit Blues stars like Eric Clapton and Paul Butterfield, alongside US veterans like Champion Jack Dupree and Eddie Boyd, who’d moved to Europe in the ‘60s.

Always understated, Peter Green’s playing on ‘Greeny’ is perfect; simple and catchy as hell, but with complete mastery of his instrument.

7) Stanley Clarke - ‘Blues For Mingus’, from the 1979 Nemperor LP ‘I Wanna Play For You’.

This was another ’90s bargain from Avid Records in Oxford, but I first heard it when babysitting in the late ‘80s. The couple who’s kids I was deemed suitably responsible enough to be left in charge of were very happy for me to listen to their small but perfectly formed record collection, and many happy evenings were spent with a pile of C90s taping all sorts of classic jazz and blues. Took me the best part of the next 20 years to find my own vinyl copies of them all mind you. The uptempo jazz rock that Stanley Clarke was known for in the ‘70s is featured throughout the part-live ‘I Wanna Play For You’ album, but this downtempo small group number perfectly encapsulated my idea of what a jazz club gig should sound like; dark, smoky and soulful.

8) Al Green - ‘Lay It Down’, from the 2008 Blue Note LP ‘Lay It Down’.

Is it controversial to call this my favourite Al Green album? I mean, you can’t deny the classic ‘60s and ‘70s hits, but for me, this Questlove produced LP is right up there in terms of songwriting and production. I could have happily featured any of the album tracks here, but went with the title track for the silky strings and restrained playing from Questlove. Something as a drumming producer myself I’m less good at ;)

9) Matt Deighton - ‘Hey, My Mind’, from the 1995 Focus LP ‘Villager’.

This whole album is stuffed full of timeless sounding songs, it's one I’ve listened to alot over the years and comes complete with alot of happy memories.

Just before I got the plugging job, I’d been working in promotions for (the original) Virgin Radio in London, driving a branded vehicle around town all day. Seems mad and pointless in 2020, but it was fun in 1995, I was young, it seemed to be sunny all the time, I had a free 4WD and it paid quite well. I used the station’s copy of ‘The White Book’ - an entertainment industry directory that cost a small fortune back then - to look up the addresses of my favourite record labels, and spent most days knocking on their doors in an attempt to blag some free records. One of these labels was Acid Jazz, and, having announced which station I worked for, I was rushed in to meet their head of marketing and plied with records and CDs, before someone eventually asked ‘so, what is it you actually do at Virgin again?’. I bluffed my way through the next 10 minutes and agreed to have a chat to the producer of the evening show about getting a session for Matt Deighton. Matt was the singer and guitarist with Mother Earth, of whom I was a big fan, and was currently promoting a new solo album ‘Villager’ - Mother Earth had been a guest on the Virgin show before, and so the producer said yes to a session. I’m sure she would have booked him anyway, but she graciously let me set it up with Acid Jazz, gaining me some vital industry kudos and connections in the process.

10) Money Mark - ‘All The People’, from the 1998 Mo Wax / A&M LP ‘Push The Button’.

Mo Wax were one of my favourite ‘90s labels, having been introduced to them by a college friend sometime in ’93, and I think I tried unsuccessfully blagging my way onto their mailing list in my Virgin days, but later on, after the A&M deal, I had better luck getting occasional freebies. ‘Mark’s Keyboard Repair’ was the record that the genre lo-fi was invented for, with the mix of bit-crushed samples and live vintage keys, but ‘Push The Button’ is a brilliantly rounded record, with some great pop songs. Session legend Jim Keltner is playing drums on this track, which I’d forgotten about until I was reading the sleevenotes while recording this mix - his playing with the likes of Delaney & Bonnie, BB King, Leon Russell, Bill Withers, Eric Clapton and all of the Beatles on their various solo projects has been a big influence on my drumming style over the years. Records I’ve never heard of but have bought just because Jim Keltner is on drums is an extensive section of my collection.

11) Bedouine - ‘Summer Cold’, from the 2017 Spacebomb Records LP ‘Bedouine’.

Spacebomb are one of my favourite contemporary labels, with a studio sound and ethos that I aspire to greatly as I enter my third decade as a producer, and I’ve been picking up their releases since hearing label owner, and talented artist, Matthew E. White interviewed on 6 Music back in 2015. LA Based Syrian born Bedouine put out one of my most listened to albums of 2017 (and since!), and I would have featured any of the tracks in this mix, but something about the found sounds at the end of ‘Summer Cold’ seemed to work very nicely with the start of the following song from Emily King. Bedouine’s vocal and guitar sound is wonderfully distintive, and beautifully enhanced by the sympathetic Spacebomb Horn and String arrangements - get yourself the LP!

12) Emily King - ‘Distance’, from the 2015 Making Music Records LP ‘The Switch’.

I didn’t listen to many new records while I was producing Izo FitzRoy’s debut (track coming next!) - I think I thought I’d find it distracting, I suspect that wouldn’t have been the case, but once Izo’s record was in the can, I gorged on releases I’d missed and found things that have become all time favourites. Most of them seem to be by women with a very different sound to Izo, but equally captivating writing and energy. Emily King is one of those artists, along with Bedouine, Jane Weaver and Aldous Harding amongst others. ‘Distance’ is such a great song, and I love Emily’s voice and guitar playing, plus the production and feel too - ticks all the boxes for me.

13) Izo FitzRoy - ‘Heads Held High’, from the 2017 Jalepeno Records LP ‘Skyline’.

This was one of my favourites from Izo’s debut that I produced and played on a few years ago. A great lyric and performance from Izo over a groove that we worked hard to sound like a mix of samples and live instruments, but was in fact all recorded and produced in my studio at home. Initially Izo and I were writing on some tracks that I’d already recorded with a view to them going on a Dr Rubberfunk album, but it was pretty clear after we’d written a few things together that she had so many great songs that the project needed to be an album for her. Even at a few years distance, I’m still really pleased with how the record turned out, with a ’studio sound’ I can call my own, and one that I’ve been able to carry over to my recent ‘My Life At 45’ LP - on which Izo turns in another couple of killer performances!

14) Urban Species - ‘Blanket’ featuring Imogen Heap, from the 1998 Talkin’ Loud LP ‘Blanket’.

Along with Acid Jazz and Mo Wax, Talkin’ Loud were another label I was madly collecting everything they released throughout the ‘90s and beyond. Having DJ’d in support of Urban Species at my college in 1994, I was already a fan, and their second album ‘Blanket’ is one of my all-time favourites by any artist. It features two great collaborations with Terry Callier, and two with Imogen Heap, including the title track featured here. Great writing and production, I was very influenced by this record as I started working with vocalists. Always love the guitar solo over the fade out too - if it exists, I’d love to get my hands on the full version without the fade!

15) Routes In Jazz - ‘Out In The Jungle’, from the 1992 Concious Records 12” CON 999.

Another sure shot from my days as a nascent DJ at Froebel College in West London in the early ‘90s. I was fortunate to have the support and encouragement of a couple of older students as I joined the Student Union and started organising events, and one of them - Lee - actually let me borrow his records a few times to play out with. Cheers Lee! This was one he used to play in warm up and bar sets, and I loved the double bass loop and ear worm horn sample (I never have worked out what it’s from), so had to get a copy. In some ways it’s a very 1992 record, but has stood the test of time in terms of production as far as I’m concerned.

16) DJ Krush - ‘Yeah’, from the 1994 Mo Wax LP ‘Strictly Turntablized’.

Early Mo Wax classic, from before all this sort of thing was considered ‘trip hop’, it was just killer instrumental hip hop as far as I was concerned, and DJ Krush, along with DJ Shadow, was right up there, leading the way. Another big influence on me when I eventually got a sampler - tough drums: check, swinging bass sample: check, jazzy horn and vocal samples: check. Love it.

17) Freak Power - ‘My Heart Sings’, from the 1994 ‘In Dub - The Fried Funk Food EP’, bonus album with some vinyl editions of the ‘Drive Thru Booty’ LP

They say never meet your heroes, but having meet and worked with both Norman Cook and Ashley Slater, the creators of the Freak Power project, I’d have to disagree. Naturally, if you’ve read through the tracklisting this far, you’ll have worked out there’s another showbiz story to go with this selection, and there is, but I’m saving it for another time, ‘cos it’s LONNNGGGG. Suffice it to say, ‘Turn On Tune In, Cop Out’ was a massive tune in ’93, and when the album dropped the following year I was straight down the record shop on release day. I wasn’t expecting a bonus ‘Dub EP’, much less one with almost unrecognisable remixes of the album tracks, but I was very happy to have it included. Some of the best downtempo beats Norman has made I think, and the drum programming on the second half of this track had me scratching my head in my pre-sampler owning days and wondering how the heck it was done. Fabulous sample choices, and nice and long too - handy for those DJ set comfort breaks.

18) John Martyn - ‘Sunshine’s Better’ (Talvin Singh Mix), from the 1996 Go! Discs promo 12” SSB1.

Talking of long tracks, here’s 10 minutes plus of John Martyn and the balearic classic ‘Sunshine’s Better’ reworked beautifully by Talvin Singh. John was another of the artists on Go! Discs when I was plugging for them, and I think it’s widely accepted he was a challenging character at that stage of his career. Still an amazing songwriter and performer though, and sounding as good as ever on the album ‘And’ from which ‘Sunshine’s Better’ is taken. Phil Collins on drums too.

19) Incognito - ‘Out Of The Storm’ (C’s Planet E Mix), from the 1996 Talkin’ Loud promo 12” TLDJ54.

If you were putting together a downtempo set in ’96, and you had ‘Sunshine’s Better’, you needed this Carl Craig mix of ‘Out Of The Storm’ for sure. Hip hop drum loops, swirling synth pads, a wobbly flute sample and some perfectly placed little bass guitar fills and turnarounds made this perfect in so many ways. I was VERY excited to get a promo copy, and definitely felt I had ‘arrived’ as a DJ when this came through the letterbox one morning. old DJ voice “Those were the days.” LOL.

20) Freddie King - ‘Gambling Woman Blues’, from the 1977 RSO LP ‘Freddie King (1934-1976)’.

In case you were worried I’d skipped over my love of the blues with just one track, here’s a less well known number from Freddie King, recorded during sessions with Eric Clapton and his band in the early ’70s, just a few years before King’s untimely death in 1976. I’ve got plenty of albums by the ‘Three Kings’ (Albert, B.B and Freddie) and they all had some very funky moments in the late sixties and early seventies. This posthumous compilation album was also in the collection of the family I used to babysit for, another tape that had pretty much worn out before I could track down my own vinyl copy, which, as you can hear, has been well played too. Again, a track that seems to fade just as it’s getting going, but fear not - there’s a 20+ minute version on some of the popular streaming services.

21) Donny Hathaway - ‘What’s Going On?’ from the 2014 ATCO Records LP ‘Live At The Bitter End 1971’.

I heard Gilles Peterson play tracks from this album on his 6 Music Show on Record Store Day in 2014. RSD often falls on my birthday weekend, so I thought I’d treat myself to this re-issue (with previously unissued tracks) of Donny Hathaway’s 1971 shows at the Bitter End on Bleecker Street in New York City. Although there aren’t many artists that can make a convincing go of covering Marvin Gaye, Donny is definitely one of them, and ‘What’s Going On?’ sounds just as relevant today as it ever did. I felt it was an appropriate choice, given the state of the world today, my love of black music and the fact that my whole music career is based on it. Once more, for the people at the back, BLACK LIVES MATTER.

22) Wes Montgomery - ‘Sun Down’, from the 1966 Verve Records LP ‘California Dreaming’.

3 quid from, you’ve guessed it, Avid Records. Bargain. I listened to an absolute ton of blues guitarists in my late teens, but it was a few years later that I started going sideways into jazz guitar, falling in love with the soul jazz / acid jazz sound of Grant Green and Ivan ‘Boogaloo Joe’ Jones, before finding the earlier generation - the likes of Barney Kessel, Kenny Burrell, Joe Pass and Wes Montgomery. Tricky to pick between them to be honest, but it seemed this upbeat and optimistic big band number from the 1966 ‘California Dreaming’ album by Wes Montogomery, a mixture of contemporary pop covers and jazz standards, with Herbie Hancock on piano, and engineered by Rudy Van Gelder - two more heroes of mine - was a good way to close out my Dusk Dubs choices.

[fzhrrr]

Wedding stories

Ive been wanting to write about my wedding since, like 3 months ago. Somehow it got postponed every single day coz there’s always things to do. Life after marriage sometimes mean splitting yourself in 3 different directions. Your off days arent just yours anymore. That one off day per week that i got also belongs to myself, my husband, my family, his family, my dirty laundry, my books, my skin and i guess you can pretty much guess where along that list does my blog goes down.

Anyway, wedding stories. Disclaimer, rather than a dreamy- fantasize version of romantic fairy tale, my wedding is far far away from that.

Just last week, we had our sanding ceremony on A’s side. I was surprised that it was probably my favourite (most bearable) out of all three receptions. 

I think the reason being is that we learned a lot of no-no’s from the previous majlis. This time around we decided to wear a traditional ensemble, something loose, not too heavy and just comfortable to be in on a hot day. And i especially love how the pictures turned out. Honestly a teeny tiny piece of super malayness in me kinda dreamed of having this picture. Two pengantin on a simple pelamin, in a songket outfit, headpiece and all. Its the kind of picture you’d hang on your wall and hope to one day proudly show your grandkids. (and they’d probably laugh on how out of fashion we were)

But yeah, it was nice. In Muar I did my own make up, and was so happy with how it turned out. We blew 800 ringgit on make up alone during the akad and majlis in cheras and i was so cranky because it was so horrible. The one during akad wasnt so bad (it was how people deemed make up pengantin should be, but my eyes were heavy and i look jahat in all the pics), but the night time do was just, unbelievable. I was in such a bad mood the only reason i got out of the house was because it was too late, and we cant keep the guests waiting. 

I paid titi athirah, an old schoolmate to do my makeup and she so claimed it was at a discounted price. Didnt want to be so fussy coz apparently 800 is “cheap” for two ceremonies. I said i wanted just a basic look with deep red lips, she then insist on putting lighter foundation to make me look lighter coz its night time, then she had the audacity to put cheap glittters on my eyes and these tacky red gloss on my lips.

Pictured- annoyed me knowing she messed up, and knowing we ran out of time to fix things. Thick brows, tacky lips, orange skin,I look like a russian pornstar- and not the expensive kind.

I spend the whole evening feeling so ugly and embarassed. Yes, thats the exact words. In every picture my face was either grey from the wrong foundation shade or just sour, because i knew i look bad. I dont feel like myself, i was a horrible bride and A had to calm me down through out. I confronted this to titi, and she said to make it up, why dont she do one more service for free. That offer is just pure garbage coz dude, the damage is done and there’s no undo button to reset your wedding day. It is what it is.

I was so uncomfortable that i wasnt fully able to appreciate those who came to my wedding. I was reluctant to say hi, i dont wanna meet people, i just wanted it to end quickly. The crankiness outweighed my happiness of actually seeing friends and family who came to celebrate with us. 

So this was one of the biggest lessons and tips to all brides: on your wedding day you only have one job- to be pretty and pleasant. And the only way for that to happen you need to be comfortable. 

In Muar, there was some miscommunications which in the end lead me to doing my own make up. Oh people were just hogging around me- your eyes are so plain, your lipstick is too pale, your foundation is too dark, your base arent thick enough we can see your pores and human skin imperfections! The comments were so crude up to a point where i stood up for myself and said, can everyone just let me do my make up they way i want it. Because i feel like people can be so disrespectful when they want you to conform to their standard of beauty, without them realising it (cause hey, its only right for them to criticize and diminish the bride self worth on her wedding day)

I aint gonna be homeless-looking-russian pornstar 2.0.

And im glad i stood up for myself.

True, my make up wasnt perfect. Brows were crooked, there were shiny patch of oily skin all over my face. But A said i look nice and comfortable (like my usual make up do), and that was all that mattered. I was happy and glowing and excited to be bride of the day. And it obviously made me happier coz my man knows what i like best for me.

The kampung majlis was lively. Kompang and berarak and that whole shenanigan. Food was good and i ate like theres no tomorrow. The only problem was we didnt know how to pengantin, so after the formal meal we sort of just sat inside and mind our own business. We didnt invite our friends, and we knew <1% of the guests. A has always been the quiet guy and i was definitely not gonna muster up all my strength and bravado to go table to table and greet people. Took a few pictures with my family, pretended to drink water a few times and we went for an outdoor photoshoot with my brother. We really didnt know what to do.

The sun was scorching hot and we just wanted an out from the awkwardness of facing humans. You are the main star of a show people half heartedly come to see on your post postcall day. If there’s one principal i live by, its that you are an adult who can make your own good and bad decisions. You dont have to stay in awkward moments, you are allowed to make selfish choices. 

And we chose an outdoor photoshoot at 3pm. Here’s us, barely able to open our eyes, in a picture where there’s more semak than sweetness. (but at least we got out of the awkward pengantin situation)

Kudos to idi, because this time we didnt have to pay the photgrapher thousands of ringgit for a few good shots.

I feel like this post is getting too long, and i ran out of energy to continue typing. Point is, pae’s married now. Wedding both sides are done so if the stress can go away and let my period cycle, skin condition and blood pressure return to normal that would be nice.

Do take note that being married is magical. And a life filled with love is unimaginably more beautiful than anything you can imagine. My rant is about the wedding, the wifing part i do enjoy bery bery much.

Here’s some random wedding shots for keepsake. enjoy:)

[timothyakoonce]

Transcript of Want to Be Like Amazon?

Transcript of Want to Be Like Amazon? written by John Jantsch read more at Duct Tape Marketing

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John: You want to be like Amazon? Even in your small business? I mean who are we kidding, Amazon? Well we’re going to talk with Bryan Eisenberg about be like Amazon. Check it out today.

  Hello and welcome to another episode of the Duct Tape Marketing podcast. This is John Jantsch and my guest today is Bryan Eisenberg. He is a long time featured keynote speaker for things such as search engine optimization and conversion rate optimization, and I’ve had him on the show a couple of times, some of you may recall waiting for your cat to bark… maybe a call to action definitely [buyer legends 00:53] and a number of other books. Today we’re going to talk about Be Like Amazon a new book, even a lemonade stand can do it, it’s a book he wrote with his brother Jeffrey and… long time — I’ve been a long time fan of also contributor Roy Williams , wizard of ads [00:01:13] so Bryan thanks for joining me. Bryan: I am so excited to be here. You’re actually the first time I get to talk about the new book so it’s always a pleasure and again having that long-term relationship, I value really being here with you. John: Well thanks so much so yeah, dependent on when you’re listening to this we’re recording this mid-April 2017 and the book is freshly out at that point. So give me — what was the kind of big picture if you’re going to say, “Here’s the thing we wanted to accomplish with this book.” What is it? Bryan: So actually two things. One to clarify, only the kindle version is out so far, we’re still coming out with the hardcover and audio version in the next number of weeks you know it’s all happening. The big picture is you know at the end of the day, Amazon has now captures 43% of all US ecommerce, they’re growing faster and faster and faster, 52% of households are prime members today and Prime visitors when they hit the Amazon website convert at 78%, 22 times better than any other website out there and so they built a business, a brand, a tribe unlike any other. And there are lots of little pieces on it and as you’ve mentioned you know I’ve talked about conversation optimization, search optimization, I’ve talked about little pieces. But when you fully dissect the beast of why Amazon has grown and why the growth has scaled so much and then you realise other business can also apply the same leavers that they are, we need to make sure it’s out there for everybody. John: Yeah I’m that typical Amazon Prime buyer, if I want to buy something and this happens all the time my wife finds something and says, “Will you go on this website.” I go onto Amazon first and see if I can find it because I know they have my buyer information, I know they have my address, I know I’m going to get free shipping and so it’s you know, I’m sucked right into that. So the thing that I think Amazon does and we’ll get into the specifics of the actual book because while it is Be Like Amazon, it’s not really about Amazon per say. But one of the things that they do is they’re just time and time again, not afraid to take on markets where people have said, “You’ve got no business going there.” And they just go there and they take the storm and maybe they lose money for a while and the next thing you know they’re dominating and changing the entire industry. Bryan: Yeah you know they’re definitely not afraid to fail and learn and I think that’s a critical component of what they do and we talk about that as one of their four pillars, this culture of innovation. We all know they went into the Smartphone market and that bombed, but that’s okay, they’re not worried about losing it. And I know the first thing people are going to say is that of course I’m not worried about losing because the stock market is basically funding their growth, they’re not profitable blah blah and I hear that all the time. Even this morning in the last couple of days there’s been a popular video going on this guy talking about how Amazon is not profitable and disrupting retail and it’s not true. They’ve been profitable since 2001. They just know that the times are changing, we’re leaving in a world where customers are on quicksand and the marketplace is on quicksand. They’re setting expectations no matter what industry you’re in for how experiences should be like, how fast you should respond to things, how fast you should take core of issues, how soon you should get packages to people, how soon you should you know respond to a lead form. They’re doing all this, they’re going into home services, they’re going into entertainment winning academy awards. So… the management style — and this is what we really talk about in the book, the thinking of doing it is what allows them to come in there and because they’re so obsessed with the customer — no one is very upset when they get it wrong because they know at their heart the brand is in it for the good of the customer and I think more brands need to start thinking that way and certainly we can look at the [00:05:21] and that may not be the case there. John: Excuse me. So the — you already unleashed the four pillars so I want to come back to that idea but first I want to talk a little bit about the style of the writing of the book. It is different certainly for you and you know a lot of it is written in the metaphor parable style and you know like who moved my fish — kidding I was combining two [00:05:47] but somebody ought to — I’m going to write that, who moved me fish I like that. Bryan: You should like that one. John: But first off… clear up for some people because you know those books can be hoaky, they can be very message heavy and the story is sort of secondary or the characters or the dialogue are just really bad. So you worked with somebody who I think is brilliant [00:06:13] Williams in doing this and has done it in many ways and in many forms. How was that different for you in trying to write a book and how do you feel about how that turned out? Bryan: So I’ll never forget, we had a friend of ours after they [00:06:30] and you know that was the number one Wall Street Journal best-seller and they came to us and said to us you know, it’s amazing, you managed to put nine books into one. And you know, we’ve always had that habit and Roy talked [00:06:44] presentation about Amazon and it really blew him away with the depth of information that we were giving people and it was overwhelming, there’s only one way to tell this story which is through a story which is what [00:07:01] was about. We know stories carry different impact. The problem with a lot of business [00:07:06] books is that you know you have to read 150 pages and to get one point across you know and it’s the effort of the story. I think what Roy and clearly you know way more talent than me or my brother have, did an amazing job of passing it full of great nuggets of information but also making the story really entertaining. I mean we talk a little bit about the kind of does a little self [00:07:34] in chapter 11 what a good book needs or what a good presentation needs, what a good pitch needs and I think he really did that in the book right, [00:07:43] it needs the hope, it needs the big idea, it needs the step-by-step and it kind of put all of that into the book. I think to really deliver something that you know — Jeffrey and I alone probably couldn’t have done. And as we’re reading the reviews on Amazon [00:07:58] Kindle for now umm we’re seeing that people that are not a big of parables [00:08:06] couple of others are saying but this one does the job [00:08:11] still giving us the five stars so you know, kudos to Roy for his talent. I wish I had you know, a 10th of it. John: Well and it has a little of something that most business — in fact all business books lack and it actually has some humour.

  Bryan: It does have some humour and some nifty lines especially when we start talking about marshmallows and yeah there’s a few good ones in there. John: So how does this book then for people who have read Buyer Legends and again, we had you on the show to talk about that, how does this relate to that book? Bryan: So you know one of the things that Amazon has done so well and I think what Jeff [00:08:52] did, he didn’t think of anything new in terms of thinking about the four pillars that we said we talked about, you know he’s not the first person to focus in on customer [00:09:01] that’s not it. This is something companies like [00:09:06] has done and plenty of other companies have done — we even have a free survey that people can take on the Be Like Amazon website where they can grade themselves on the four pillars and it comes from something that people have been doing for like 13 years. It’s just we’ve renamed to match our pillars, but it’s a study that we’ve been doing for these big companies and small companies for years and years and years. That part is nothing new. What I think Jeff [00:09:30] has done is how he’s turned it to scale. How he’s taken this [00:09:37] start-up and made it work which is two key things. One, small independent teams, nothing that [00:09:44] couldn’t feed right? But the second one is they actually use the concept of what we talked about in Buyer Legends, these small narratives. Before every meeting, all the executives have to write a five to six page document explaining what they want to cover [00:10:00] perspective of that customer. And I think once you start taking that approach and telling the story from there — of course we tweak it a little bit because we found Buyer Legends’ formula that’s worked when we brought it into other organizations [10:13] what Amazon does works for Amazon. When you combine the two and you understand how it all — you know how all the pieces work together that’s the brilliance of why they have such scale. So I don’t think you can just say, “Yes I’m going to raise my income and do all four pillars but now we also have to figure out how to inject it into our culture.” And that’s where the Buyer Legends falls in. John: Yeah and I think that one thing — so we’re going to start with the first pillar that you’ve mentioned a couple of times, customer centricity. You know I think an interesting thing when you think about an online store, I mean there is no — I mean customer interaction in the same way, you don’t walk into your store and say hi how are you doing, how are the kids, I mean it is — it is essentially interaction through clicks and through hotspots on webpages and on forums, maybe some customer service interaction obviously, but how do you think that they do such a good job at understanding what customers want without essentially sitting down like a sales person might with the customer?

  Bryan: You know I’ll never forget — I was joking around with a friend of mine who’s in charge of — who led the personalisation effort at [00:11:26] many years back and he had already left [00:11:29] and I think this was when call to action came out and they first started putting out you know people bought this were also interested in this kind of stuff. And at one point he had found a picture of people who like a particular type of sexual encounter book also like clean underwear okay? And he talked about how that made personalisation may have gone a little too far… and of course people got it wrong. But at the end of the day, it’s [00:12:05] it’s just data. Back in the day when you used to have a small store — and by the way this is something that frustrates me [00:12:14] retailers, I don’t care who you are. If you’re [00:12:18] if you’re [00:12:19] if you’re [00:12:20] okay. Let’s set you go to [00:12:24] and you have somebody there who takes really good care of you and I’ve heard it from many people. A lot of people — it’s almost like a personal shopper who — they know them, they know their family they know [00:12:33] they want to look a particular way [00:12:34] great. The problem is that person gets tired [00:12:39] or some illness happens, that history is gone, gone. Right? Those companies aren’t thinking in terms of [00:12:48] right? Basic customer management. How do I record those things? How do I turn those into insights? And that is one of the things that Jeff [00:12:56] has taken from day one. When people [00:12:59] customer centric company, talked about this you know in [00:13:03] 1995, this was his approach. It wasn’t that he was trying to be warm and fuzzy because he’s not that warm and fuzzy kind of guy. It’s just that he knew that every click, every affiliate site that had data on you that you visited, all this information, this book you read, this show you watched on Amazon Prime, everything you share, everything you put into the wish list… gives you insight into the kind of person you are right. And that’s how [00:13:33] it’s all about understanding and valuing people and the experiences and always looking to stay ahead of where they are and looking to give them great experience and it’s funny but it’s paying attention to tiny details, it’s not about getting what people expect right, it’s about what they don’t expect to get right. And so I love this, it’s a great example, two business, totally — had nothing to do with online this could be any business in the world. I have two friends of mine who run business is Tampa Florida okay, very different businesses but yet they both are incredibly customer centric. One of them, he decided he was going to do donuts, he wanted to sell donuts with his family and with his kids, stuff like that. So he started a mini donut factory in Tampa Florida and one of the key things he decided to do was that every single donut is made on spot, so you walk in there, if you’re in Tampa you need to go, you walk in there, not good for our diet but he’s got six pack abs and he still eats donuts every day so I’m thinking if he can do it we can at least sample a couple okay. You walk in there and they make the donut, they take it fresh out of the oil and every single one gets hand decorated and if it doesn’t look like it’s exactly perfect to share on Instagram or Facebook or Yelp or Google Maps it gets thrown away okay. It’s got to be absolutely visual stunning on top of the great taste and the combinations that he’s come up with. That’s customer centric. He’s always thinking about how to shine in the eyes of the customer okay. John: Puts a little pressure on the decorator. Bryan: But that’s it you know it’s not fancy people doing it but he teaches them how to do it and it’s funny there’s actually — you can go ahead and Google — there’s a morning show clip with him doing it and the morning show host trying to decorate their own one and he says, “Nah. That one would be thrown away.” Kind of teases them. The second one is a pest control business okay and you know in Florida as in Texas, we get some pretty nasty big bugs down here, you really don’t want to see bugs in your house so bad enough we see snakes and scorpions and [00:15:50] outdoors, you definitely don’t want them in your house. So they have — it’s a company called [Safer Home Services 15:54] they do one a year pest control [00:15:59] they come out, they plug in every hole so that not bug ever get into the place and again, they’re always trying to experiment and improve things, it’s always about delivering it so you never have to call the bug person to come back to your house again for the next year. And it’s worrying that how to get great at delivering these experiences, we talk about also with [00:16:21] how they do it in the book. You know any business can really like… just dominate their industry just by focusing in on the tiny little detail. John: Yeah and I think that folds very nicely into number two, in fact I think they’re very related because I think a lot of people will say well you’ve got to be customer centric. Well you don’t get customer centric by having a meeting and talking about it and saying here this is what we’re going to do. It’s about paying attention and going oh, here’s how we can optimize this experience or here’s how this little thing you know didn’t work necessarily and in fact this is the money quote in the book, you ready for it? Bryan: I’m ready. John: “Continuous optimization is a by-product of caring.” And I think that’s the part that people completely miss. Bryan: Yeah you know and you know I started in this industry 1998, Jeffrey and I start the first agency for conversion rate optimization and this is why — part of the reason why we had to do this book as a [00:17:18] for 20 years, we had tried to get people to understand hey, you need to optimize, you need to take care of your customers right. And we’ve tried through analytics, we’ve tried [00:17:27] copyrighting and we see what happens. Amazon has completely dominated obviously [00:17:34] retailers fell on deaf ears [00:17:38] getting part of the tactics of [00:17:41] so now you see definitely doing some testing, stuff like that, but the challenge is this is not like you said, this is not a project this is about really accepting and caring about your customers and the pillars don’t work by themselves, it really is what we call a fly wheel, you’ve got to have all the pieces working together and it kind of accelerates one on top of the other so the customer centricity is the first push right? I’ve got to care about the customer, I’ve got to wow them, what am I going to do that’s just going to be so different from everyone else. Okay, what next? Now we focus on continued optimization, we’re going to do things — not everything’s going to wow them, not everything’s going to make the process better, not everything’s going to make the process more efficient for us and for them. We share all kinds of stories from [00:18:25] guys to Jewellers. Every business can find ways to optimize every [00:18:33] marketing, but every part of their operation so that you can find ways to wow customers through that optimization. And you’re going to fail sometimes and that’s okay. So you just take the data and you move to the next thing right. But it’s always about creating values for the customer, not just hey let me change the colour of a button, what value did you add for this customer? If you’re not adding value to the customer really you’re not caring and ultimately it’s not going to have a major impact to your business. John: Yeah and I would suggest that continuous optimization has to go beyond the purchase, that’s where I think a lot of people drop the ball is you know okay I click the button or I came into your store and bought, what now? What do I experience now and I think that’s where a lot of people just don’t think about it and I think that’s where [00:19:17] major gaps anyway.

  Bryan: It’s funny you mentioned that because I’m getting ready to do a keynote in a couple of weeks in New York at a retail conference. And one of the my favourite things to demonstrate this to Amazon — about Amazon is you know it’s the only company that’s ever really done this whole concept of frustration free packaging. Whereas I’m sure you’ve seen a Curb Your Enthusiasm’s clip where Larry [00:19:43] trying to break into his gift and he gets the screwdriver out and then he gets the scissor and then get some — just trying to fight into that package. So what I’m actually doing is I’m bringing two packages that I ordered, one from Amazon and one from Toys Are Us and I’m bringing them right on stage and I’ll invite some people on stage while I’m showing that Larry [00:20:04] clip in the background. And I’m going to invite them to open up these packages and inside — the very inside of these packages is a Rubik’s cube actually so two people are going to walk home with a Rubik’s cube. Difference is, the one from Amazon, the packaging is their regular Prime [00:20:22] you know you can rip it open easily with your hand but still seems to be sturdy enough, obviously someone who obsesses over packing tape, and the other one is like this plastic clear tape that if you don’t have a knife and of course I’m not going to get one from [00:20:35] nobody’s going to be able to even open. Okay but let’s assume somebody figures out how to open it, inside there right, the Toys Are Us one is a clam shell of a Rubik’s cube right and I know you’ve got grand kids and you’ve got kids you know, nothing is more frustrating than fighting through that clam shell to get to the gift that you want. And [00:20:58] made us realise, it’s not about delivering the gift it’s about when they’re finally enjoying it. So in the Amazon box it’s in a paper — in a little cardboard box, just opens up and you’ve got it already playing seconds later. Rules are different.

John: I’ll give them that, they definitely have somebody or an entire department that works on the exact size of boxes or something. So let’s talk about that because we’re kind of getting into innovation for many of the innovations of Amazon really come around shipping.

  Bryan: Well it’s shipping, I mean also everything from you know what they’ve done with Alexa and I think you know, from a marketing [00:21:36] perspective, everybody last year kept asking me what do I think the big trend is going to because everyone was talking about AR and BR and stuff like that and I said no, the next big horizons going to be voice, be ready for it. And of course, that was [00:21:51] after I made those predictions and all of a sudden Alexa has 7000 now over 10000 new commands that it understands that you can integrate into it, skills. So yeah you know, the shipping certainly you know [00:22:06] robots and trying to get things to optimize you know how and where they put locations, to what they’re doing in the stores, they’re re-defining stores, Amazon Go project right? The [00:22:20] check-out that they’re trying to do you know, yes it’s not available yet [00:22:25] absolutely, will they lose some money doing it, sure, but they’re going to keep pushing because they know at the end it’s better for the customer if I can get [00:22:32] if I can get products to you in half an hour. I mean two minutes before we got on the call I saw someone drive up and drop off a box that my daughter needed for her class. I mean we ordered it yesterday! Beautiful thing. John: Well and you know I’m sure a lot of retailers and certainly ecommerce folks hate this but that then becomes the norm too. I mean why would we wait three days for something or why would we get in our car and drive for 30 minutes when we know we can have it tomorrow and I think they’ve created sort of the norm. Bryan: That’s it and it sets expectations for B2C and B2B right and [00:23:11] at this point as well. [00:23:13] Washington Post, I think every industry is going to be influenced by this, insurance, banking, they can get into any business they want to fast okay and I always like to remind people it’s like if they’re not in your industry yet, what are you going to do when they do decide to get into your industry? How are you going to approach that? John: So let’s wrap this up because we could tell stories about Amazon and how — we’re both kind of fan boys so we could tell that until we’re blue in the face. I mean how can somebody take these four pillars if they are any number of businesses or a modelling contractor or a hair salon, not necessarily pure digital play but how do they take these four pillars and apply them? Bryan: Yeah and so this is where we come back to the Buyer Legends right. You really need to get a good understanding of who your customers are. And you need to plan out what that experience is going to be and as we talked about in Buyer Legends but also in the book, you have to start from the end and work yourself backwards right. What’s it going to take in order for everybody to have a five star review? What would it look like, what would that experience look like, what would you have to do? What’s going to differentiate between your hair salon and every other hair salon in the world? And you have to map out what those things are and then you have to [00:24:33] what data can I collect that will let me know if that’s right or wrong. I have a friend of mine who owns a — another passion of ours, a baseball training facility and he’s applied the four pillars to his business and he keeps trying to find innovating ways of okay, how can he gather more measurement in terms of what’s going on with his players and the people visiting so like one simple thing he did was just instead of having a book where people can sign in he turned the sign in into an online checkout form right. So now it’s an electronic data form, little things and it just streamlined the process, nobodies waiting to sign in, everybody knows there [00:25:15] anyway, they go on there, they put it in and they’re done. It just takes a little bit of innovation, a little customer centricity, a little bit of optimization to keep testing it and of course, you’ve got to be agile, you’ve got to keep executing, you’ve got to get it until you get it right and do it over and over again. And you can be just like Amazon. John: Well one of the things I love about this is you know in a lot of ways these four pillars, certainly they need to drive through the whole organization but they — you could look at this and this is the job of the CEO [00:25:49] organization with five or six people you’re still the CEO but quite often you know we’re doing whatever needs to be done work, as opposed to this idea of focusing on these four pillars and I think this would be the high pay-off work even in the smallest of organizations. Bryan: We have seen that over and over again you know, every company we’ve ever worked with that we’ve started doing this four pillar work with, the dividends are multiples because it does, it does affect everything from boardroom to stockroom, it affects how your bathroom looks you know, it affects how your parking lot is going to look, how people are greeting people to how things are getting delivered and when you start — and you need the buy-in from the CEO because it’s not going to work if not and you know, I think when we look at — I think we all know retail is going through some terrible times and lots of business are transforming based on the industry we’ve been in that’s caused so much havoc has also been wonderful, this online industry [00:26:57] but I think when you realise that many businesses are not going to survive because of the expectations set by people outside of their industry and newcomers are just going to come in and say, “Oh, well we can apply these same approaches at Amazon to your industry.” You know if they haven’t taken the effort to do it they’re going to really struggle to stay relevant to their customers. John: So Bryan, where can people find Be Like Amazon? Bryan: So here’s the cool thing right because after having done this for 20 years, yes they can get a Kindle version right away on Amazon, they can find that. Like I said, we’re coming out with a hard cover, we’re coming out with an audio book, we’ll also be doing the book in Spanish. But even right now if they just go to the Be Like Amazon website just for subscribing we will send them immediately the first three chapters and every two days after that the next chapter so they can get the whole book for free. We just know that the information needs to be out there. So I don’t care whether people pay for the book, read the book for free, it doesn’t matter, the information needs to get out there because if not, we’re going to see a lot of pain in this industry. John: Bryan thanks so much for sharing. Great book. Pairs well with Buyer Legends so maybe pick up both and hopefully we’ll see you out there on the road soon. Bryan: Looking forward to it. John: Hey thanks for listening to the Duct Tape Marketing Podcast. Are you an independent marketing consultant or an agency? You might want to check out the Duct Tape Marketing Consultant Network, it is a growing group of independent marketing consultants and agencies that are partnering and collaborating and using the Duct Tape Marketing tools and really scaling their businesses, so check it out at ducttapemarketingconsultant.com

from Duct Tape Marketing https://www.ducttapemarketing.com/transcript-of-want-to-be-like-amazon/