#but the baby’s mom is very Specific about gendering items (unfortunately)

[tj-crochets]

Another little quilt top! This one is made using the remaining squares from the other green baby quilt I made, so I did not have to cut out any squares or do any initial ironing and it only took an hour :D

[foreversecrets]

Whistleblower

Chapter 1: Home Invasion

Lloyd Hansen x OC (Rebecca Wilson)

Summary: Escaped from the hell of omega breeding rings Rebecca is hungry and tried but her wounds aren't going to treat themselves, unfortunately she stumbles into the wrong abode.

Emma was just approaching the second trimester of her pregnancy but there wasn’t much for her to do besides plan for the pup. It wasn’t often anyone in the pack was needing medical assistance and part of her regrets the deal she’d made with her husband but part of her is gald she gets to be a stay at home mom. With Steve away for the next week for Avenger business, it's the first time she’s truly been alone in five years. She wants to take advantage of this time to start planning out the nursery, they agreed not to find out the gender of the baby, settling with a geographic theme. Steve has been able to shut up about the colorful world map he is going to paint on the wall since the decision had been made, while she finds it endearing his brothers have practically banned him from discussing anything baby related. Tablet in hand she’s using the program Lloyd found her to test out furniture in specific spots throughout the room. 

Scrolling through the specs of a promising looking crib, the familiar squeak of the front door breaks her concentration. She sighs, Steve promised he was going to put some WD-40 on the metal so it would stop alerting the whole neighborhood. She checks the time on the tablet, each day since Steve has been gone one of the brothers has stopped by to check on her today she suspects it's supposed to be Ari but he usually comes closer to dinner so he and Maya can eat with her. She knows Ari well enough at this point to see his timing for what it is, insurance that she's eating properly to provide for herself and the pup. But it's only 3:42 pm, he should be on his way home from picking Maya up from school, a little too early for him to be dropping by.

“Ari, is that you?” she asks as she makes her way down the stairs only to come to an immediate stop as she smells a strange scent in her home, she isn’t able to identify a designation, probably on suppressants. She immediately goes to her phone, finding and calling Lloyd, his home is the closest and he is the most equipped to help her.

“Don’t,” the stranger growls, neither have eyes on each other yet but she’s heard Emma. Emma places her phone face down on the hall table and goes to stand at the top of the stairs. “Come down the stairs with your hands where I can see them.”

The stranger pops out from the kitchen area and glares at her down. The first thing Emma notices about her is the gaping gunshot wound in her shoulder, she’s also bleeding from varying other places. She is covered in dirt and grime so Emma isn’t convinced whether or not her hair is black or not but her eyes are a very obvious green, and she’s far too thin. 

“I’m a nurse I can-”

“Shut up!” the stranger shouts, grabbing a hold of Emma as soon as she is close enough to her. Emma preys Lloyd picked up the call and is on his way, he isn’t the kind of person to openly show emotion but she knows everyone in the pack would do anything to protect one another and she is no exception.

“Please, I’m pregnant.”

“Just shut up and sit down at the table.” The woman pushes her to the dining room table and Emma obeys easily not wanting to endanger herself or her pup. 

She watches as the stranger begins going through her pantry and stealing all their non-perishable food items, stuffing them in a worn looking Jans backpack. While she’s distracted when pillaging the Rogers kitchen, Emma notices movement out of the corner of her eye. Not wanting to draw the strange woman's attention back to herself, she doesn’t move her head until the person comes closer, then she only moves a fraction to see Lloyd. But her movement gives her away and the omega turns on her, this time with a gun in hand pointed directly at her. 

“I’d put that down if I were you,” Lloyd growls as he places himself in front of Emma, out of the omegas line of sight. 

“Or what?” she spits.

“Or my brother, is going to stick you with that nasty concoction.” Lloyd points behind the women just as Ransom pops out from the shadows with a syringe in hand. The woman swings wide and lands a blow to Ransom’s nose, giving Lloyd the opportunity to get the upper hand. He uses the butt of his pistol to whack her on the back of her head, easily knocking her unconscious. 

The stranger knocked out, Lloyd sets about tying her up while Ransom’s, pinching his bleeding nose, moves to Emma. “Are you alright? Did she hurt you?”

“No,” Emma’s voice is shaky as she watches Lloyd bind first her hands and then her feet. She knows some of the men in her life are involved in dangerous dealings and careers but she never imagined they would turn up on her doorstep. “She just made me sit, I don’t think she knew anyone was home.”

“We have to call Steve, Lloyd will handle her.” Ransom promises, trying to coax Emma into calling her alpha. 

🔐🔐🔐

When Rebecca wakes up it's in a familiar situation, keeping her eyes closed while she assessed. Her hands were bound but they were bound in front of her so that was something, her feet were unbound on the surface she was laying on. Her head hurt but nothing else did and she was fully clothed, so she suspected she hadn’t been recaptured and brought back to the ring. 

“I know you’re awake pudding,” she recognizes the voice and realizes it wasn’t a dream. She’d broken into a house she’d thought was unoccupied but a pregnant omega was there, it wasn’t long until help arrived including the male alpha voice. The male she was pissed to discover was her mate upon registering his scent similar to dove soap and melted chocolate. Opening her eyes she’s on a couch the alpha sitting on the coffee table pushed too close for comfort to the couch. “Let’s start with something easy, what’s your name?”

“What happens if I don’t want to answer your questions?” She slowly sits up on the couch, a little dizzy. “Is the omega alright?”

“Now you’re so caring?” Lloyd smirks. “You’re not leaving here until I get some answers so take all the time you want.”

“Free room and board?” she smirks. “Why would I answer your questions if this arrangement is already far superior to my current one?”

“Street rat then? You expect me to believe you just randomly stumbled upon Steve’s place.”

“I don’t know who Steve was and I wasn’t going to hurt anyone. I didn’t know anymore was home, I was just getting supplies.” 

“Emma mentioned you were stealing food.” Becca looks off to the side, not able to meet the intense blue eyes. “Your scent is blank, you are stealing food, your clothes are worn down. I just need a name to verify what I’ve already realized.”

“And what have you realized?” she spat out at the pity in his voice. He didn’t acknowledge her question, just pulled her hands into his to remove the handcuffs but didn't release her hands. His calloused fingers rubbing soothing circles into the palms of her hands. “Rebecca.”

“Last name?”

“Wilson.”

He releases her hands to pull out his phone, tapping a couple times before showing the image on screen to her. It's a missing persons ad from her hometown back in Iowa, the phone number listed was her fathers before he passed after the last time she managed to escape and retreat back home. 

“You’ve escaped an omega ring before, I imagine that’s where you’ve been the past couple years as well?”

“They took me when I was fifteen, I got away when I was seventeen and made my way back to my father. They found me, murdered him and I’ve been stuck with them for the past ten years. It's hard to sell a disobedient omega.”

“Your scent?”

“The drugs they use to control our hearts also block out our scents, but part of me thinks they did it on purpose to prevent anyone involved with the law from sensing the distressed omegas and freeing us.” 

“Well the good news is the drugs are wearing off,” he stands retreating to the other end of the room. “The bad news is you're about to go into heat and we both know what you aren’t saying.” 

She tries to distance herself further from him on the couch despite him having retreated from her. 

“How do you want to handle this?” he sighs.

“What do you mean?”

“Your my mate, there is no way I’m letting you continue to be homeless but we just met and it wasn’t the best of introductions, your heat only complicates things further.”

“You’re going to help me?”

“My brothers would tan my hide if I let you continue on as you have been but Emma is going to need an apology and Steve’s going to be a grouch about it.” 

She carefully stands and moves across the room to where he’s retreated, she has to crane her neck a little to look up at him. Maybe it's because she knows he’s her mate, maybe it's his scent relaxing, or just the demeanor that says he could strangle a bear and not break a sweat or maybe it's because she’s been alone and terrified for far too long, but she stands to her tip toes and smashes her lips to his. When he doesn’t react, just lets her do her thing she pulls back suddenly self conscious, he doesn’t let her retreat though, he plants his hands on either of her hips and holds her to him.

“Listen, I’m not the sentimental soft guy.”

“I can tell.”

“I don’t do flowers and date nights.”

“Okay.”

“I don’t want pups or marriage, none of that.”

“Alright,” a smirk is curling at her lips now because even as he’s saying all these things about him that he believes to be true, she can feel his conviction waning. 

“Yeah?” he asks in surprise, but the excitement manifests in how his hold on her tightens. She nods laughing. “Fuck.” he groans before tossing her over his shoulder and heading to his bedroom. He may not be able to give her his mark now but he sure as hell is going to make sure there’s no doubt who this omega belongs too. Her scent of sugary goodness that speaks to the foodie in him is going to be diluted by his own scent until that's all anyone can smell on her, and when it starts to fade, he’s going to fuck her again and again. She is his, titles and signatures be damned.

[anxiouspregnantlady]

17+4

First...I want to note that I’ve (for the most part) stopped counting the days/weeks of my pregnancy - like I had to think for a bit before I wrote the title of this post. I think this is a small but lovely marker of how much less anxious I am feeling, and how I’m not in survival mode anymore (aka I just need to make it one more day...one more day...).

So, in this week of pregnancy:

Maternity clothing purchases. Uhhh... I’ve bought a lot of stuff this week. First I bought a pair of inordinately expensive joggers from *yikes* lululemon. I have a lot of unreasonable shame about this. But last Saturday I just couldn’t find any bottoms that weren’t uncomfortable on my belly (I don’t have any maternity pants yet, and it was 32 degrees out so no skirts/dresses unfortunately), and so...I stormed off to lululemon in a somewhat emotional state. BUT I am so very happy with my purchase and most of all am confident that they’re going to last throughout the pregnancy AND be wearable postpartum (I went up two pant sizes). I know everyone raves abt the align leggings but I just couldn’t make them work, maybe my legs are abnormal? Like when I went up one size, the belly was too tight still, but when I went up two or more sizes, the ankle was super loose.

My rule of thumb re: maternity-specific clothes is that I won’t pay more than $20 for an item and hope not to buy more than 1 pair of jeans and a few pairs of shorts. This week I scored a pair of (used) madewell maternity jeans for $20! They have the adjustable side panel rather than the belly band which I think will be better for summer. They haven’t come yet but I’m hoping they are it.

K & I also went to the chinatown mall this weekend and walked into H&M to ask if they carried any maternity clothing..the guy just looked at us like we were crazy. “No.” Like, why would we?? Same at Gap, Old Navy, etc. Sooooo I bought a nursing bra and a pair of maternity sweatshorts off the H&M website. I think the last time I ordered something from H&M was over 8 years ago lolol but apparently they have good maternity stuff, so...we’ll see!

Baby purchases. This week I bought my first ever thing for baby. This is a HUGE milestone. I’ve been way too scared to buy anything for the past four months (for fear of what if, blahblahblah). So I guess this was more symbolic than anything? Anyway I bought this hat from a super fancy baby shop downtown and it’s SO FREAKKIINNGGG CUTE and teeny. Damage about $10, oh well. Also fairly gender neutral. We know bb’s gender/Biological sex but still are hoping to dress them in all kinds of colors.

Baby movements. Feeling baby move quite consistently, and yesterday while we were lying in bed watching TV k put his hand on my belly and felt his first kick!!! Honestly this has been such a double edged sword...feeling baby move is SUCH a lovely relief and so precious. But when I don’t feel bb move when I feel like I ought to I get stupid anxious even though you aren’t even supposed to worry about consistent movement for like...another two months.

Nausea. So. This past weekend nausea came back with a VENGEANCE. I had 2-3 days of nausea + migraine + fatigue and felt so sad/defeated because I didn’t know how long the spell was going to last. Thankfully it lifted and I’m feeling back to my second trimester self. THANK U HORMONES. THANK U BB.

My weight. I unintentionally found out my weight - it was written on a labcorp report for my alpha fetoprotein blood test - which came back negative yay (means vvvv low risk for spina bifida/downs). I guess your weight affects the interpretation of the results. I think ... it mattered a lot less to me than I thought? It was also lower than I thought (but not that much). Also I was just happy that the result was normal. I’m actually pretty glad that I know my weight (taken at 16+4) even though it’s just one data point. It’s a couple lbs over what I’m assuming to be my pre-pregnancy weight so I think what happened is I lost 5-ish lbs during the first trimester and then gained a little more back over the past 5-6 weeks, which seems pretty good to me. I think I might be ok knowing my weight at various milestones moving forward (like I’d be curious to know what I weigh around delivery) but I’m pleasantly surprised that it doesn’t mean that much to me / it’s actually not that big of a deal. I feel good in my body and that’s what matters.

18 weeks. I need to just get this out somewhere... I’m a little nervous about crossing 18 weeks because my mom had a stillbirth/late miscarriage at 18 weeks. There. I said it. That’s all. She said it was due to low amniotic fluid so you’d best believe I am chugging water like there is no tomorrow.

Dental cleaning. Feeling anxious about dental appointment in .. one hour hahaha. I have been avoiding the dentist for a year (COVID was a good excuse). I know it’s so important to see the dentist during pregnancy BUT my stupid insurance is so bad that nobody I call will take this plan anymore so I am going to pay out of pocket for a cleaning. And refuse x rays. I am quite religious about dental hygiene but somehow I still have teeth problems - probably get this from my dad. Anyway. I am trying to adopt a ‘curiosity’ mindset and say, let’s DISCOVER how my dental health is and FIND OUT what we can do to be as healthy as possible (sounds so stupid lolol) rather than just lapsing straight into anxiety. AHHHHH. will report back later.