#but that combined w the entire fandom defending what she did
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bright-whump · 3 years ago
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fyi, i agree abuse is abuse. and it's not ok. you're not alone my dude. i don't get why people aren't on board with that.
also you're latest fics have been giving me life. so thank you for that too!
HELP I saw "fyi" and "abuse" and I thought the worst and was like "nah, I gotta go, not rn" /tosses phone/ lmfaoo thank God
I'M REALLY GLAD TO HEAR THIS !!! Like!! It's not hard!! It's really not!! To just!! "Yep, hitting kids is bad! Next question!" ????? THAT'S. Why is that controversial! Abuse is not a contest nor should it be "well this abuse is worse so this 'lesser' thing shouldn't be called abuse." Especially in this fandom where she literally on screen slapped Malcolm so hard he almost fell down and he was crying. Like. That wasn't a little nudge on the arm! And the amount of screenshots I have of people saying he deserved it and it wasn't abuse and "you can't even blame her!" ??????? And especially they use him being an adult as an excuse for why it's suddenly not abuse, and then as soon as you bring up that she also showed abusive behavior when she shook 10yo him while he was telling her "please stop you're hurting me!" you get blocked and labeled a sexist meanie or something because obviously there's no such thing as being abused by a woman and being triggered/arguing with people who are trying to convince you child abuse is okay is Wrong and Bad and YOU are the one in the wrong because you should simply let people have their harmless opinions...
You can still love the fuck out of Jessica/Ainsley/Martin and have them be your absolute favorite people on the show and all that! I super love Ainsley and I love to hate Martin and I even liked Jessica a few episodes! But you literally can't make posts in a fandom that attracted people who related to Malcolm and had abuse in their pasts, making reasons why they're angels and perfect and explain in essays why Malcolm just deserved/deserves their abuse/abusive behavior??? Or say shit like "disrespectful kids actually NEED to get hit it's good for them" or "I know Martin abused the shit out of him but he's still a really good father, abusers can still be good parents :(" or "Malcolm's an adult he shouldn't be so stupid as to fall for what Martin does" as if the second you turn 18 you gain magical powers to suddenly be immune to horrific gaslighting and emotional/psychological manipulation
These weren't like AO3 fics tagged "victim blaming" and "abuse apologism language" or whatever else, it wasn't "ooo whump, love whump" where whump is already by definition "fictional pain", there was no "well clearly it's just fiction, it's just a story, it's just a bad guy saying these things for drama or Malcolm thinking it because he's traumatized" no, these were actually just people's real opinions and they weren't fiction, they were real, about all victims/survivors. Malcolm is fake but posting your opinions that "you can't be abused as an adult and if your parent hits you you deserved it stop acting like it was a big deal" (someone on another platform literally called me crazy for thinking it was abuse and said "good job showing me you know nothing about "real abuse") is real and affects people and was so gross to see just thrown into the main tags.
It was so. Fucking disgusting. And so fucking triggering. Constantly fucking triggering.
Throwback too to being on a server of literally like 60 people and being told in the middle of everyone by a homophobe 20 years older than me (who was defending Jessica and insisting about how it wasn't abuse of course) that I personally irl wasn't actually abused and not only did no one say "hey, that's really fucked up, don't do that" and instead just watched and then awkwardly tried to change the subject, but then I was said to have overreacted because I got upset??
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I am. Ranting. Holy shit. Sorry. Lmao. Man. MAN. I really! Don't like a lot of people!
Thank you so much for sending in this and making me remember the small part of the fandom that is in fact kind and good and caring lmao, I appreciate you, and thank you SO MUCH FOR YOUR COMPLIMENTS!!! I'M SO GLAD YOU LIKE MY STUFF!!! Much more whumped boy coming 😌😌💕💕💕
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twinkletoes-rp · 5 years ago
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A Butterfly’s Heart
Fandom: Miraculous Ladybug Genre: Hurt/Comfort, Angst, Fluff Pairings: Adrinette, Tikki/Plagg, background Nathalie/Emilie Relationships: Marinette & Nooroo Words: 4,085 Other Links: FFN | AO3
Dedication: Surprise gift fic for @belles-lettresdemoncoeur​ for being the best RP partner I could ask for and to cheer her up since she hasn’t been feeling well lately! (Credit to her for some of the ideas surrounding Emilie and Mari’s care and the ‘Tikki’s choice’ line (I reworked))
Summary: After the final battle for the Miraculous, Hawkmoth – A.K.A. Gabriel Agreste – is dead, Paris is safe, and its heroes are recovering.
In the midst of it all, one little butterfly has a lot of TLC coming his way.
Please note: This is definitely a canon divergent fic! Starting with "Guitar Villain" in season one, Marinette and Adrien get closer and closer (they're also older in this because fuck canon's logic - they're seventeen here, almost eighteen in Adrien's case). Because of this, Mari and Gabriel interact more, and despite being continuously impressed by her work, the two of them butt heads personality-wise, especially where Adrien and his happiness are concerned. Thus (fic spoilers starting here!), after kidnapping Ladybug and Chat and torturing LB, seeing her as the source of his problems since she's always foiling his plans, when he finds out Mari is Ladybug during the final battle, he flips out and kicks the crap out of her, so hard and so fast she doesn't have a hope of defending herself - before finally trying to take her out of the game entirely. Also, in this version of events, Nathalie has always been a very good mother figure for Adrien, loves him like her own, and does not join Gabriel. She and Emilie are also a thing. Chloe is also not a Miraculous holder here, and her and Lila's bullying is much more severe than canon would ever (be allowed) to portray.
---
Finally, the Battle for Paris is over.
Team Miraculous comes out on top, but it isn’t without fallout.
In the end, Adrien needs five days to heal from his broken nose, bloodied-raw wrists, fractured ankle, and split lip. His bruises and cuts are still healing when he refuses to sit around anymore. How can he when there’s so much going on? 
His mother is back, safe with Nathalie and Gorilla. She’s doing well, all things considered, awake and smiling and getting stronger every day with the help of the medical team, a fixed Peacock Miraculous and Duusu, and Tikki and Plagg’s combined magic. She’s walking on her own again by the end of the week.
It’s Marinette who isn’t nearly as lucky. It takes two weeks for her to wake from her medically-induced coma. From the extent of her laundry list of injuries—five broken ribs, a thrice-broken nose, finger-shaped bruises on her neck where Hawkmoth – Gabriel Agreste – tried to strangle her, the stab wound clean through her stomach, severe internal bleeding, gashes and bruises covering her body, and the fact that they lost her twice in surgery before getting her stable, just as a starting point—it’s no surprise. Adrien makes sure she gets the best care possible, calling the best nurses and doctors in all of France to come look after her (and his mother) around the clock. He’s thankful they’re professional enough not to press for more information after he claims she was just caught up in the final battle. (Nathalie checked them all out extensively before they were even contacted, and they still sign confidentiality wavers, just in case.)
Apart from Nathalie forcing him into the shower, Adrien never leaves her side.
When Marinette finally does wake up, she’s panicked and confused and in pain, but a tearfully overcome yet stubborn Adrien is there and does his best to take care of her. He calls her parents immediately, has the doctors examine her and give her something for the pain, and once they’re done and her parents have smothered her in crying-relieved hugs, he explains everything. He does it in pieces over the coming days, not wanting to overwhelm her too much at once, and with her pounding head and hazy memory of everything past being stabbed, she’s grateful. (She doesn’t remember he’s Chat Noir, for instance, that she knows that, but she knows that Chat Noir knows she’s Ladybug – Tikki had to choose between revealing her identity or saving her life, and Adrien’s tearfully thanked the little goddess a trillion and one times since that day for choosing the obvious. He will tell Marinette later, he swears, when things are…decidedly less complicated.)
She also knows that Adrien knows she’s Ladybug, and that was…a thing that happened. It took her several minutes to come down from that particular panic, but once she did, they talked it out. After a day or two of adjustment, she’s…okay with it now. If any civilian were to know her secret, especially now that the danger’s passed…she’s so glad it’s him. 
It’s another week and two days of going in and out of consciousness and healing before Marinette is able to stay awake through the day. She still can’t move much, let alone get out of bed or walk yet, but she’s getting there, and that’s all any of them cares about. She laughs happily when Tikki snuggles into her cheek in congratulations, Plagg nuzzling into her hand and purring loudly—
—and that’s when something that’s been on the edges of her previously-foggy mind finally hurtles to the forefront with a sudden jolt of clarity. Marinette springs upright like she’s been shocked, breath hitching at the pain and realization both. At her side, Adrien is instantly on high alert, instinctively taking her hand while he looks and listens for anything that might be a threat. “Marinette? What is it?”
"W-what about Nooroo? Is he okay? Where is he?"
Adrien blinks for a long moment, and then he softens. Of course. Typical Marinette. Always thinking of other people even when she’s the one who almost died. He’d managed to get the Butterfly Miraculous off his father before it could be destroyed along with him, and he’d been keeping it with him for safekeeping. He figured she’d ask eventually, so it doesn’t take more than that for him to bring it out to show her. She immediately grabs it and puts it on.
“Marinette, wait! You might not be strong enough for—!” Tikki tries to warn, Adrien and Plagg just as worried, but it’s already too late. Even if it wasn’t, they know she would have done it anyway. It’s just how she is when she cares about someone. It’s why they love her.
For now, all they can do is wait on bated breath. Plagg reaches for Tikki’s paw, the show of support for her as much as him. It’s been centuries since they’ve seen their youngest…
There’s a flash of light, and the butterfly Kwami materializes before them. Opening his eyes, Nooroo looks around, confused and worried. "Where is—?" But then, he's hit with that feeling every Kwami gets when his holder, legitimate or not, dies, and he curls in on himself. "Oh, no... M-Master..."
Realizing he’s not alone, he cautiously takes in the others in the room. Seeing Marinette with the brooch, his little face fills with tentative hope. "M-Mistress...?"
Mari can only smile kindly, a bit sadly, and shake her head, gesturing to her earrings. “Sorry…”
He gasps instantly, a shocked, awed smile coming to his face, and he sweeps into a sort of bow. "Oh, Ladybug! Forgive me, I did not know it was you!"
Marinette flushes brightly at his reaction, sending a confused, alarmed glance the others’ way. Adrien seems to be in the same boat as her, but Plagg is as exasperatedly fond as either of the kids has ever seen him, and Tikki just stares at Nooroo like she’s finally gotten back something precious. Turning back to Nooroo, Mari waves her hands in front of her carefully, not wanting to scare him, a nervous smile on her lips. "Y-you don't have to bow, really! I'm not t-that important! And don't worry about it, i-it's okay! We've never met before, so how could you know, right?"
Nooroo comes out of the bow a bit sheepish, a slightly darker purple blush coming through, and Marinette just melts. She bows right back, as low as she can in her condition, just like her mother taught her, pain be damned. "I'm Marinette Dupain-Cheng. It's very nice to finally meet you, Nooroo. Tikki’s told me so much about you."
He feels less silly at her bow, she sees, which was her goal, and she holds out a small, gentle hand – an invitation, not a command. "I'm sorry to wake you up like this. I know you need your rest, and you’ve more than earned it. But I just...” she softens further, “…I wanted to see how you were doing. I've been worried about you for a long time. We all have been. The other Kwamis, too.” Her smile gentles, becomes the tiniest bit sad again, while her empathy rises. “You've...you've been through a lot, haven't you?"
She wants to cry at all the awful things he must have suffered at Gabriel's hands. She doesn't realize a tear's actually slipped out until there's a soft fluttering at her cheek, catching and wiping the tear away. "Please do not cry on my behalf, Marinette. I will be fine,” Nooroo reassures, backing up an inch or two to give her some space. Normally, he wouldn’t dare get this close to anyone, never mind someone he just met, even Ladybug, after what he's just been through, but...he gets a very good vibe from this child. He feels...safe with her.
She breathes a laugh and smiles a little more. She wants to cuddle him, to promise him no one will ever mistreat or misuse him or his powers again while she’s around, but she doesn't want to scare him off. Soon, she hopes. "Thank you, Nooroo. I'm happy to hear that. But until then, if you’ll have me, I'll do anything I can to help you. I've...been through similar things, so I know at least some of what you're feeling." Adrien squeezes her hand. Nooroo looks a little confused, and she can’t blame him. If he wants, she’ll tell him all about Chloe’s bullying growing up and Lila’s lies and manipulation later. She glances at Adrien, warming. "I'm sure Adrien will want to help, too.”
The boy nods vehemently, more than once. “Of course! I—” He looks away, suddenly nervous, rubbing the back of his neck. What if…Nooroo doesn’t want his help? What if he blames him, is mad at him, for not suspecting and confronting his father to save him earlier, regardless of how dangerous that would have been? But…looking at the little guy, he doesn’t seem angry in the slightest. If anything, he seems delighted to be feeling happy and safe for the first time in forever and just as awed to be meeting him as he was Ladyb—er, Marinette. Taking a breath, Adrien steels himself and comes back, determined as ever. “I want to help undo what my father’s done to you. And if I can’t quite do that, then…” he smiles sweetly, “…if I can at least help the healing process in any way, please don’t hesitate to let me know. I’d be honored.” He follows Marinette’s earlier lead and bows as low as he can. “It’s great to meet you, Nooroo. I’m Adrien Ageste.”
Nooroo smiles shyly and returns the bow, more confident this time. He doesn’t miss the way Adrien is particular in using his real name with no hints toward his own Miraculous. He figures that’s on purpose. Perhaps Marinette doesn’t know...? How interesting… He’s sure Tikki and Plagg will fill him in later. “The pleasure is mine, Adrien.” That aside, he straightens and has this to say, looking the boy right in the eyes: “You are incredibly brave to stand against your father as you have. Countless others would have turned and run without hesitation. Regardless of his choices, you are worthy, indeed. Do not doubt yourself.”
Adrien’s eyes widen, his mouth forming a small ‘o,’ and for a moment, Nooroo wonders if he’s said too much, shrinking and an apology already on his lips. A glance Marinette’s way shows she’s confused, and he senses some puzzle pieces might be fitting into cracked memories, but he can tell she hasn’t figured it out, so he thinks he’s safe. He was careful to be cryptic, of course, but he knows firsthand (technically) just how clever this Ladybug is.
All the same, Nooroo is opening his mouth to apologize, almost reflexively, just in case, when Adrien’s eyes well up with tears and a touched smile forms as his heart swells with gratitude and intense affection for the Kwami. The boy breathes a shaky laugh, the hand in Marinette’s – the hand he’d used to Cataclysm his own father right in the face – trembles, but his smile holds, and he nods, swearing then and there that he’s going to be there for Nooroo every step of the way from now on. He owes him that much. Nooroo deserves that much. “R-right. I’ll do my best. We’ll—we can do it together, all of us.” Marinette nods and squeezes his hand. “Thank you, Nooroo.”
It’s Nooroo’s turn to be surprised, even shocked, a blush and small “Oh…!” leaving him, but he’s so happy, and it’s a wonderful feeling. He laughs, the sound like tinkling bells so foreign to him now that he startles himself at first, going with it at Plagg and Tikki’s delight. Adrien and Marinette immediately know they want to hear it as often as they can. “Of—of course, Mas—A-Adrien! I meant every word!”
Marinette softens. “I’m sure Tikki and Plagg will—” Glancing over at Tikki, she pauses. There are huge tears rolling down Tikki's face while Plagg does his best to comfort her, and she can tell she’s barely holding back sobs. "T-Tikki, what's wrong? Are you okay?"
Tikki answers with a lurching sob and a cry of "My baby's home!" before surging forward to wrap Nooroo in what he’s pretty sure is the tightest hug he's ever gotten. He surprises himself by accepting it as easily as he does and hugging back just as tightly, letting her cry and crying a bit himself. He should have known he’d accept it from her, though, his mother in every sense, divine creation be damned. He was so alone and so scared for so long... But he's safe now, with her, with Plagg, with these wonderful, extraordinary children. He knows he is.
When they separate minutes later, Nooroo looks between Marinette and Adrien and once again bows as low as he can. This time, they don’t stop him. "Thank you for saving me, Lady—er, Marinette and Adrien. I cannot thank you enough. I am in your debt."
Marinette melts all the more. She’s still confused about the parts of the last battle she can’t remember, but for now, she’s almost certain she’s adopted the little sweetheart. "Of course, Nooroo. But there’s no need to thank us. We're just glad you're finally home safe. That's the important thing."
Adrien nods, threading his fingers through Marinette’s and squeezing. (He doesn’t notice how red she’s turning just from that, but she returns the gesture, a shy beam coming to her face, and that’s all he needs.) “Mari’s right. You and Duusu are home and fixed now, and everything can only get better from here. I’d say that’s a pretty good place to start, wouldn’t you?”
After being with Gabriel for so long, even if his service was unwilling and terrifying, Nooroo feels some parts of him are still loyal to the man, and despite being the youngest Kwami, Nooroo isn’t stupid. He knows he’ll probably need a lot of care and help and time to work through everything he’s been through, but...he also knows they're right. He knows what he went through was anything but good, knows that the loyalty he feels is from the abuse instead of anything remotely earned or deserved, and it feels…impossibly good to finally be able to admit that, even to himself, without fear of backlash. And here, with these people and his fellow Kwamis…he truly does feel like he’ll be okay.
So, he just smiles, perhaps tiny, but bigger than it’s been in so many years, and he nods. "I...I agree! I am happy, too, to be...a-away from...him..." He can't say his name, and he doesn't want to call him ‘Master’ because he—he wasn’t, not really, not by right or Choice, as it should be. So, he settles for that for now. He'll find something to call him in time. For now...
It's only then that he notices just where they are, in some kind of sterile human environment meant for healing, and he isn't sure how he didn't realize how...hurt Marinette is until now. There are still some ugly yellow bruises and scrapes on Adrien, too. Perhaps being awake and free fazed him too much.
"Oh, no...!" he says, so horrified and quiet it's barely a whisper, fluttering closer to look between them and take in their injuries as best he can. "You're hurt! You're—you're humans, human children! Why—? Your suits should have—?!" Then, his eyes widen and well with tears, going pale as memories flood back. "I...I helped him hurt you! I...I...!"
Marinette and Adrien trade a concerned glance, Tikki and Plagg, too. Is he only just now remembering more from the battle? Does he—did he maybe block out all Miraculous battles for his own sanity? Mari makes to reach out to him carefully, but she stops barely halfway, unable to bring herself to get any closer. The last thing she wants to do is scare the poor babe. “N-Nooroo? Are you okay?”
He snaps to look at Marinette, wide, haunted eyes moving from her face to her heart and back like he's frantically checking something, looking more heartbroken by the second, a few tears rolling down. "Ladyb—M-Marinette, you—you died...! Y-your human body gave out, m-more than once, you...! Y-you're lucky to be here at all! And yet, you still...!" He sobs outright and flies toward her faster than he can remember in all his years, nuzzling into a tiny, unmarred section of her cheek. "I-I'm so sorry...! Y-you didn't deserve that...a-any of it...! A-Adrien either! I...p-please...c-can you e-ever forgive me...?"
Marinette's heart automatically goes out to the poor thing, and this time, she reaches up to almost hold him, but leaves more than enough room for him to tell her no or shy away or get away, if he needs it, just in case. She doesn't want to make him feel afraid or trapped. He's felt both for far too long. She'd rather die (maybe not the best choice of words right now, but too bad) than add to that.
"Hey... Hey, Nooroo... It's okay, minou..." She makes sure her voice is light, calm, and gentle like a warm summer breeze. "Can you...can you look at me? And I mean, really look at me?" It takes a few tries, but he does look her in the eyes eventually, and she melts a bit more. She doesn’t understand how anyone could be so terrible to a being so inherently good. She wishes she could do more for him. She will, somehow. "What wielders do with Kwamis’ powers...it's not the Kwamis’ fault. Some people, like Gabriel, only see you as tools. They want to use your power and abuse it for their own gain, no matter what it does to them or the Kwamis or anyone else. That is never the Kwamis' fault. What Gabriel did to me, to us, using your power…it was not your fault. It will never be your fault."
He still looks unconvinced, so very guilty, so she purses her lips tightly before trying another way. "Let me ask you something…" She takes a slow, deep breath. This might be hard for him (and Adrien, Tikki, and Plagg) to hear, but it's necessary. This is where her own painful memories of the final battle, what she has so far anyway, will come in handy, she supposes. "When...when Gabriel was Hawkmoth and he...he was beating me, when he...stabbed me," Nooroo flinches at the reminders, tearing up all the more, but she just smiles gently in kind, hoping to reassure him, "you didn't want to do it, right? You...I'm sure you asked him to stop, told him to, begged him, did your best to resist and fight back. Am I right?"
Nooroo nods immediately, so frantic that she's afraid he might give himself whiplash. His eyes are wide and shell-shocked and somewhat far away, he looks even paler all of a sudden, and he squeezes his eyes shut as the tears become too much. "Of course I did!” His little voice is still quiet, but it’s louder than it’s been yet, shaken and pained. “I asked him what he was doing, why he was hurting you, begged him to stop, tried to tell him you didn't do anything wrong—a-and when that didn't work, I-I said I wouldn't let him hurt you, ordered him to stop! I-I fought him as hard as I could! It's—it's why I lost energy and dropped his—his transformation before Chat Noir could—!"
Mari holds up a hand to stop him, still smiling, though the memories have made her pale as well. Her hand shakes the slightest bit, the one in Adrien’s, too, making him hold on tighter. Nooroo goes silent immediately, grateful for the reprieve, tiny chest heaving with emotion as he watches her confusedly. Adrien and the other two Kwamis are doing the same, not sure what she’s cooking up, but trusting her implicitly. "See?" she entreats, her voice falling tender and soft like the morning sunrise, shaky undercurrent be damned. "You wanted to know why, and you wanted to help me. You fought him every step of the way and did your best to stop him. I might be hurt, sure, and I...I might have lost the fight a few times and been in a coma for a while, but...I'm still here. I'm alive, and I'm sure that is because of you, Nooroo.”
Marinette is pretty sure she’s turning his entire view of the situation on its head. Good. “You dropping the transformation when you did gave Chat Noir the time and opening he needed to step in and take Gabriel down. Without that, he might have kept beating me, and Chat might not have been able to stop him. He might have killed me for real." His eyes are glued on hers, wide and shocked and awed once again, but for entirely different reasons this time, better ones than the mantle she holds, and it’s her heart’s turn to swell. "I wouldn't be here, alive, right now without you, Nooroo." Tears gather in her eyes, too, and she can't help but smile softly, lightly, like sunlight through clouds. "So, thank you so much. Thank you for everything."
Adrien is tearing up himself at the display and revelations here, and he has his own thanks to give for saving his best friend, partner, and the love of his life, but he can do that later. For now, he’s going to let them have their moment. They’ve earned it, and he can’t deny how cute they are together.
Nooroo is so happy and relieved and already loves her so much that he sobs with it, his tears overjoyed and touched now, and he zooms in to nuzzle into her, hug her cheek, wipe away her tears that fall. “Th-thank you, Marinette!”
Once they’ve both calmed down, he still has one more thing. "You've been...having nightmares, I expect." Nooroo glances over at Adrien, Tikki, and Plagg to confirm, and it's a silent, unanimous yes. Vivid memories of her heart rate monitor spiking in the dark of night, shaking, hyperventilating, tears, broken cries of Chat or Adrien’s name, whispered pleas and apologies. He moves to nuzzle into her a little more, voice lowering. "I can help with that. Let me guard your dreams, Marinette. Let me do that much, if not for your sake, then for mine. Please."
Mari swallows the lump that forms at how...sweet he is. Tikki was so, so right to have spoken so highly of him. Someday, she’ll find a way to tell him just how amazing he is—and have him believe it. "If that’s something you feel you need to do, if you're sure...I'd really like that. I trust you, Nooroo. Thank you, little friend."
A small gasp leaves him, and she draws back, worried she said something wrong. But as luck would have it, the little butterfly is positively beaming, not so much tentative anymore as glowing. "A...a friend? Really? I've—I've never had one of those before!" Then, remembering himself, a faint blushing coloring his cheeks, "Ah! A human one, that is!"
Marinette laughs, softening. "I know exactly how that feels.” She glances over to meet Adrien’s eyes, warming. She's sure the two of them can bond over that later, once they open up about their similar experiences. She’d love that. "And now you do. You have me now." Nooroo cheers and flutters up to press his forehead to the star of her face. Happily pressing back, she motions to Adrien, too. "I'm sure Adrien will be, too.”
He nods without hesitation. “Absolutely!”
Marinette grins brightly. “Emilie, Nathalie, Gorilla, my parents...the rest of Team Miraculous. You'll have lots of friends soon enough, Nooroo. If you want them, of course."
Nooroo is crying again, but he's hugging Mari's cheek as she’s found only a Kwami can, and this time, he gladly lets her touch him, her fingers stroking his back below his wings with the gentlest of caresses. He snuggles in more, as much as he possibly can. "M-more than anything...!"
Then it's settled.
“Welcome home, Nooroo.”
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igotanaddixon · 7 years ago
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Fallen Stars (Thorin x OC)
A/N: Hi guys! Here is the next chapter for Fallen Stars! I hope that you will like it! Thank you for all the kind words you guys sent me for this story! Love you! 
Fandom: The Hobbit 
Pairing: Thorin Oakenshield x OC (Elentári) 
Tag list: @weirdnewbie @villainlove @fizzy-custard @fictionalquintessence @ealasaid @xalexandriaxk @maidenadventure @sdavid09 @lainternettuale @deepestfirefun @shewalksinanotherworld @fangirl570
Prologue 
Chapter 1 
Chapter 2 
Chapter 3 
Chapter 4 --> Current read 
Chapter 5 
Elentári’s outfit: 
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Chapter 4: Loyalty. Honor. A willing heart… This is not enough.
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The next day, Elen made sure to stay away from Thorin. She avoided his eyes when he tried to start a conversation or when he was simply staring at her. His temper was really getting on her nerves. However, Elentári couldn’t deny that his behavior hurt her feelings. It was an odd feeling for the elf because she was used to receive hate and disdain from others but she seemed to crave for Thorin’s kindness and approval. Elen shook her head as she rode next to Bilbo, the hobbit was telling her about the Shire and Hobbits’ traditions while Gandalf and a few others listened as well.
The day went by rather quickly and soon the company decided to camp for the night near the edge of a cliff. Thorin asked Fili and Kili to take the first watch and Elen stayed awake with them. The half-elf tried to stay away from the moon light. She wasn’t ready to show the entire company how her skin would shine with ancient blue runes as the cold light of the moon kissed her skin. They were already suspicious with the half-elf, Elen didn’t need to add some glowing moon runes to her situation.
After dinner, Fili, Kili and Elen settled before the fire, their backs against the hard rock of the mountain above and their eyes focused on the darkness. Elen sighed and watched everyone sleep, she noticed that Gandalf and Balin weren’t sleeping among the others, discussing something in hushed whispers. Fili took his pipe out and lit it while Elen watched Thorin sleep.
The king was sleeping sat on a rock next the fire, his back against the rock wall and his hands on his lap. He didn’t look as if he was peacefully sleeping, his face was tensed and his entire body stiff. Nevertheless, Elentári was entranced by his beauty. The king was tall for a dwarf, his body strong with hard muscles and rough skin. His hair was so dark that the few white steaks that shew his age, almost sparkled through the night. The position he was sleeping in gave Elen’s eyes a better access to his throat and the elleth blushed as her eyes followed the line of his throat to see soft black hair vanish into his shirt and armor.
Kili noticed his new friend staring at his uncle and nudged his brother then gestured in the woman’s direction with a knowing smirk on his lips. At first, Fili frowned at his little brother but then followed his gaze and saw the bashful looking elleth staring at his king. Fili smirked and winked at Kili before deciding to speak up.
“Like what you see, miss Elen?” Fili’s voice made the half-elf jump, her eyes blinked several times as if she had been brought out of a dream in the middle of the night.
“W… What?” She asked out, her head looking from her left to her right as if she was disoriented. Fili and Kili chuckled and shared a look.
“You seemed to like whatever you saw on our uncle.” Kili stated, smirking knowingly at the woman. Elen scoffed and glared at the young dwarves.
“I was just thinking.” She defended herself.
“Oh, aye! Thinking about how handsome our uncle is!” Kili exclaimed and Elen suddenly grabbed a wooden stick one the floor next to her and threw it at the poor young dwarf in an attempt to shush him. Kili ducked and laughed while his brother shook his head in disbelief and amusement.
“Shush you oaf!” Elen said playfully. “Your uncle made it clear that he despises me anyway.” She muttered, looking away and into the fire. The two brothers looked at each other then back at the elleth.
“He does not despise you, Elen…” Fili said and reached a warm hand to squeeze the poor woman’s shoulder.
“He’s just really… confused.” Kili offered as a consolation. Elen sighed and shrugged, not daring to look at her friends.
“Don’t worry, lads. I’m used to it.” She said, Fili and Kili were ready to answer but suddenly a loud snore made them jump and after a few second of silence, the tree of them started to laugh.
Elen observed as Gloin slept; tiny flying insects got sucked into his nose every time he inhaled, and they were expelled when he exhaled. Elen chuckled when she noticed Bilbo watching the scene in disgust. The hobbit finally got up and walked around. He couldn’t sleep with all the snoring of the dwarves combined and Elen started to wonder if she would ever be able to sleep on this journey. Bilbo walked over to his pony and Elen saw him give her an apple but not before checking to see that no one was looking. The half-elf quickly looked down and smiled at herself as Bilbo finally gave the apple to the pony.
“Hello, girl. That’s a good girl. It’s our little secret, Myrtle; you must tell no one. sh, sh” Bilbo’s hushed voice said. Elentári was probably the only one who was capable of hearing the hobbit, making her smile even bigger. However, a scream rang out into the night making Fili and Kili tensed as Bilbo turned around scared and ran back toward the fire.
“What was that?” The frightened hobbit asked. Elen’s eyes scanned the horizon beyond the cliff, her right hand running across the handle of her sword.
“Orcs.” Kili seriously said as another scream is heard. Elen saw Thorin jerk awake upon hearing the word “Orcs.” He looked around in alert, his hand gripping the handle of his sword as well. His eyes landed on his nephew then on Elen and he noticed the alert state she was also in.
“Orcs?” Bilbo asked, not knowing what those vile creatures were.
“Throat­cutters. There’ll be dozens of them out there. The lowlands are crawling with them.” Fili answered, as seriously as his brother.
“They strike in the wee small hours, when everyone’s asleep. Quick and quiet; no screams, just lots of blood.” Kili added but this time, Elen heard the playful tone in the young dwarf’s voice and she glared at him. Bilbo looked away in fright; Fili and Kili then looked at each other and began laughing. Elen rolled her eyes and punched Fili on his arm.
“Ouch!” He exclaimed playfully but Thorin’s voice stopped any complains coming from the Durin brothers.
“You think that’s funny? You think a night raid by orcs is a joke?” Thorin said in a bitter tone as he got up and stood before his nephews.
“We didn’t mean anything by it.” Kili told his uncle as he looked down in shame. Thorin looked at his nephew in anger and disappointment.
“No, you didn’t. You know nothing of the world.” The dwarf king hissed then he walked away to stood at the edge of the cliff, his hands crossed behind his back and his eyes absently staring into the darkness of the night. Elen watched him for a while but her eyes turned to look at Balin as he walked to talk to the young dwarves. He stood next to Elen and leant against the rock wall on his arm.
“Don’t mind him, laddie. Thorin has more cause than most to hate orcs.” Balin started, earning Elen’s attention. “After the dragon took the Lonely Mountain, King Thror tried to reclaim the ancient dwarf kingdom of Moria. But our enemy had got there first.”
Elen closed her eyes, as flashes of the Battle of Azanulbizar plaid before her eyes. Thousands of dwarves and orcs fighting in front of the gates of Moria, blood and death everywhere… Elen shook her head as screams of death filled her ears. A massive, pale, orc wiped out many dwarves with his mace, then Elen could remember seeing the Orc engage King Thror in battle.
“Moria had been taken by legions of Orcs lead by the most vile of all their race: Azog, the Defiler. The giant Gundabad Orc had sworn to wipe out the line of Durin. He began…” Balin’s voice waved with grief. “By beheading the King.” The old dwarf said as Elen opened her eyes to watch Thorin from her spot next to Fili.
Bilbo was listening closely to Balin’s tale, Fili and Kili as well. Elen’s eyes trailed up Thorin’s back, still remembering his agonizing scream as Azog - having defeated King Thror - held up his beheaded head as he roared and then flung the head, which bounced and rolled to Thorin’s feet. Elen sighed then looked back at Balin.
“Thrain, Thorin’s father, was driven mad by grief. He went missing, taken prisoner or killed, we did not know. We were leaderless. Defeat and death were upon us.” The old dwarf said, sorrow clouding his eyes until he turned his head to look at Thorin.
“That is when I saw him: a young dwarf prince facing down the Pale Orc.” Elen remembered struggling to reach the prince and the orc. Thorin was facing Azog alone and he finally got knocked away. Thorin fell down an embankment and landed on the ground before the helpless half-elf. However, at this time Elen was trying not to be seen by the dwarves, using her energy and her essence to move as quickly as she could. She could only be seen as a flash… A flash of white light and of a glowing warrior’s silhouette.
“He stood alone against this terrible foe, his armor rent…wielding nothing but an oaken branch as a shield.” Fili and Kili listened on, completely absorbed into the story as Elentári shook because of the intense memory.
She remembered seeing Azog leap to smash Thorin, but Thorin, grabbing an oaken branch lying on the round, managed to roll away in time and avoid the mortal hit. Azog continued wielding his mace against Thorin, who was still on the ground, but Thorin blocked the mace with the oaken branch - which he uses as a shield - over and over. Azog swung one last time and Thorin, grabbing a sword lying nearby, cut off Azog’s left arm from below the elbow. Elen recalled seeing Azog clutch the stump of his arm as he howled in pain.
“Azog, the Defiler, learned that day that the line of Durin would not be so easily broken.” Balin said, his voice waving with emotion and pride for his king. Elen looked at the two brothers next to her, they were wearing proud small smiles on their faces.
The elf then remembered that she started to back off when Azog was rushed into Moria by other orcs and when Thorin started to lead his people, yelling “Du Bekâr! Du Bekâr!” to rally the dwarves to battle.
“Our forces rallied and drove the orcs back. Our enemy had been defeated. But there was no feast, no song, that night, for our dead were beyond the count of grief. We few had survived.” Balin looked down as he remembered the death of his and Dwalin’s father that day.
Finding his body had been terrible for Balin. Elen had watched from far away, she saw the desolation, the sadness, the pain and sorrow that gripped the dwarves’ hearts as they searched the dead for they loved ones. And she remembered seeing him too. The young dwarf prince who had defeated the pale orc and saved his people yet once again.
Elen’s eyes landed on Thorin as he turned away from the view beyond the cliff; the entire Company watching him as they stood wide awake and in awe while staring at their king. Thorin looked at them quickly then walked between the dwarves toward the fire. His posture still as stiff because of the painful memory he had been drown into just a few minutes before. At this moment, Elentári knew why they were following him. He was their king but he also gave them hope.
“But the pale orc? What happened to him?” Bilbo suddenly asked Balin as he sat on a small rock next to the fire.
“He slunk back into the hole whence he came. That filth died of his wounds long ago.” Thorin almost growled at the hobbit while he walked back to his sleeping spot.
Elen frowned then glanced at Gandalf from under her eyelashes. The old wizard glanced at her then at Balin, the three of them worriedly sharing a knowing look. Elen’s eyes then landed on Thorin who was already watching her with dark eyes. Elen blushed then look down at her hands. Thorin knew that she had been affected by Balin’s tale but the truth about her was beyond what he could imagine or even suspect.
After that, the dwarves went back to sleep, Bilbo too. Elen stayed awake with Fili and Kili, her eyes watching Thorin sleep for a while before she finally decided to focus on sleeping before dawn. The next day would be really demanding…
  Dawn came too quickly for Elentári, she hadn’t been able to sleep more than 3 hours last night after recalling the horror of the Battle of Azanulbizar. Consequently, her mood was execrable when she woke up. The dwarves had quickly eaten a light breakfast before everyone was already back on their ponies and ready to leave. Bilbo couldn’t help but yawn over and over as he sat on his pony, making Gandalf smile at the poor hobbit. Elen kept to herself during the entire morning, partly because of her mood but also because of the rain that started to pour down on them.
Elentári might have been an elf but she was quite different from the rest of her kind. She could feel the cold, the heat, the humidity… She could be bothered by the rain while other elves couldn’t care less. Elen sighed as she shook under her thick coat, she tightened the hood even more over her head in an attempt to stay dry and put on her black leather gloves. The dwarves weren’t as affected by the rain, they were always warm (something that Elen secretly felt jealous of) but some of them seemed bothered by the constant rain as they couldn’t smoke their pipes and their clothes were drenched, clutching to their skin. As Elen looked around to see how the company was doing she saw that they looked cold, wet, and miserable. Even if they were dwarves.
“Here, Mr. Gandalf, can’t you do something about this deluge?” Dori asked Gandalf who seemed as grumpy as Thorin that day.
“It is raining, Master Dwarf, and it will continue to rain until the rain is done.” Gandalf answered, annoyed by the rain and the dwarf. “If you wish to change the weather of the world, you should find yourself another wizard.”
“Are there any?” Bilbo asked curious.
“What?” Gandalf turned his head to the hobbit.
“Other wizards?” Bilbo clarified.
“There are five of us. The greatest of our order is Saruman, the White. Then there are the two Blue Wizards…” Gandalf said and Elen could see that the wizard couldn’t remember the two other wizards. “You know, I’ve quite forgotten their names.”
“Alatar and Pallando.” Elentári piped in, riding Shadowfax next to Gandalf.
“Ah yes, yes, indeed! Thank you, dear.” Gandalf thanked Elen. The elleth waved her hand at him as if to say ‘don’t mention it’.
“And who is the fifth?” Bilbo asked as Elen already smile, knowing who was the last one.
“Well, that would be Radagast, the Brown.” Gandalf said, looking at Elen with a kind smile. The other wizards did not like Radagast but Gandalf understood the lonely wizard and he even considered him his friend. Then Bilbo said something that made Elen completely loose control.  
“Is he a great Wizard or is he...more like you?” The hobbit asked, innocently. Gandalf looked slightly offended as Elen burst out laughing. She bent forward on her horse, holding her stomach as she laughed hysterically. That hobbit had definitely brightened up her mood. Gandalf glared at Elen who was trying to control herself as she wiped the joyful tears away from her cheeks.
“I think he’s a very great wizard, in his own way. He’s a gentle soul who prefers the company of animals to others. He keeps a watchful eye over the vast forest lands to the East, and a good thing too, for always Evil will look to find a foothold in this world.” Gandalf answered the hobbit, trying to keep him composure.
Thorin watched as the half-elf laughed. Her laugh had rung as a beautiful melody into his ears and his heart had stopped for a second. The grumpy dwarf had turn around and it was even worse. His heart started to hammered against his chest as his eyes landed on Elen. She was beautiful with her huge grin on her face and with the look of happiness that lingered on her face afterward. Her mood seemed to have an impact on the entire company, and on Thorin’s nephews especially.
Thorin hated the way he felt every time he looked at the elleth. He hated the fact that he was supposed to hate her but deep down couldn’t. He wanted to hate her, he wanted to be indifferent but that day like the last night he desperately wanted to keep her safe, to cradle her into his arms every night so she would feel safe enough to sleep. The King wanted to understand. He wanted to know who she truly was and what it was that he was feeling. The warmth that spread into his heart was so unknown for him… He did not know if he truly liked it or not.
  The day passed by quickly once again and at some point, during the afternoon, the sun had come back. Elen removed her cloak and let her clothes dry as the warm sun kissed her skin. Unfortunately, the elleth had forgotten that she was wearing a white flannel under her leather jacket. When she removed the jacket, her white shirt stuck to her skin, showing her curves in a way that she didn’t feel comfortable with. The brown leather corset she was wearing over her shirt wasn’t really hiding anything. Elen blushed as she saw the king’s eyes on her for a brief second before he looked away. However, the other dwarves did not seem to notice so she waited silently until her clothes dried.
The sun quickly started to set as the company arrived at an old, abandoned farmhouse that was in ruins. It looked burnt down and destroyed but Elen felt something evil in the air. She looked around the place still on her horse. Shadowfax tossed his head and neighed to show his discomfort.
“I know, Shadowfax. I can feel it too.” Elen told her horse friend as she ran her hand through his mane soothingly. The dwarves dismounted their ponies, following Thorin’s lead.
“We’ll camp here for the night.” The dwarf king said. “Fili, Kili, look after the ponies. Make sure you stay with them.” Thorin told the two brothers. Elen glanced at them with a smirk, knowing that the king was making them pay for their joke on orcs. Kili rolled his eyes and Fili looked determinate to prove his value to his uncle. Elen quickly tended to her horse and gave the reins to Fili before following Gandalf as he walked into the ruined farmhouse.
“A farmer and his family used to live here.” The wizard said out loud but it was obvious that he was lost in his mind and not talking to someone in particular.
“Oin, Gloin.” Elen heard Thorin voice from her place next to Gandalf.
“Aye.” Gloin answered.
“Get a fire going.” Thorin ordered as he walked in Gandalf and Elen’s direction.
“Right you are.” Gloin answered.
“I think it would be wiser to move on.” Gandalf spoke out loud as Thorin appeared behind them.
“It’s not safe here.” Elen added just above a whisper as she tried to understand what happened to the family who lived in the farmhouse.
“We could make for the Hidden Valley.” Gandalf told the dwarf king who turned around and glared at the wizard.
“I have told you already, I will not go near that place.” The stubborn dwarf said, his eyes dark at the mention of elves.
“Why not? The elves could help us. We could get food, rest, advice.” Gandalf tried to persuade Thorin. His voice was gentle but Elen could hear the annoyed tone behind his words.
“I do not need their advice.” Thorin said glaring at Gandalf once more and moving from one foot to another in annoyance. Elen rolled her eyes.
“I understand why you hate Thranduil, trust me I do not like him either but Lord Elrond is completely different.” Elen tried to explain but Thorin turned his dark eyes to her.
“I told you before, I don’t care about what you think, elf!” Thorin barked suddenly, making Elen’s eyes widen.
“Are you behaving like that with all women? Or are you just a pig with me?” Elen asked the king with a sarcastic smile on her features. Thorin’s eyes widen and he took a step toward the elleth but Gandalf took a step to interfere.
“We have a map that we cannot read. Lord Elrond could help us.” The wizard said.
“Help?” Thorin exclaimed. “A dragon attacks Erebor, what help came from the Elves? Orcs plunder Moria, desecrate our sacred halls, the Elves looked on and did nothing. You ask me to seek out the very people who betrayed my grandfather and betrayed my father.” The dwarf looked betrayed that the wizard would try to convince him.
“You are neither of them. I did not give you that map and key for you to hold on to the past.” Gandalf huffed at the dwarf, annoyance evident on his face.
“I did not know that they were yours to keep.” Thorin hissed, darkly. Gandalf looked shocked for a second before her turned around and stomped off angrily, leaving the Company.
“Gandalf!” Elen called out, trying to reason him but she knew that it was no use when the wizard was in this mood. Elen sighed and watched her friend leave helplessly.
“Everything alright? Gandalf, where are you going?” Bilbo asked as the wizard stomped past him and Balin. Bilbo looked confused and scared.
“To seek the company of the only one around here who’s got any sense.” Gandalf answered in a huff.
“Who’s that?” Bilbo asked genuinely and innocently.
“Myself, Mr. Baggins! I’ve had enough of dwarves for one day.” Gandalf hissed, clearly angry about the situation. Elen sighed and looked back at Thorin as he stepped at the entrance of the ruined house.
“Come on, Bombur, we’re hungry.” Thorin said or ordered as if he didn’t care that the wizard was leaving them to their fate.
“Is he coming back?” Bilbo worried Bilbo asked to Balin. The old dwarf sighed and looked rather unsure.
This fight and Thorin’s mean words from earlier made Elen turn to face Thorin. She had enough pf his behavior, they needed Gandalf and his stubbornness was starting to get dangerous if it cost them the wizard’s skills and protection.
“Thorin… You should reconsider what Gandalf said. I know that you don’t trust the elves but the elves of Imladris are wiser and…” Elen said as she walked closer to Thorin but the king stopped her as he screamed at her.
“I do not care about those elves! I didn’t ask for your advice, half-breed! I did not want you here, try not to forget that! You’re not part of this company. The wizard forced my hand and now that he’s gone, it is just a matter of time that I send you away to roam this earth alone because no one will ever care about a half-breed elf like you!” Thorin shouted in the elleth face, hissing the last part with his eyes clouded by anger and hate. Elen gasped and walked backward in fear, she held her arms up to cover her face as she truly thought that the dwarf was going to hit her but nothing arrived. Elen lowered her arms and looked at the king in fear then suddenly his words hit her, she felt her heart clench as she watched the anger slowly vanish from the dwarf’s face and realization hit him. ‘You’re not part of this company,’ ‘it is just a matter of time that I send you away to roam this earth alone’, ‘no one will ever care about a half-breed elf like you’… Thorin’s words replayed in her head over and over as her biggest fear came back from the deep pit of her past. ‘No one will ever love you…’ a voice said in her head and before she could control it, hot tears ran down her cheeks as she stared at the dwarf before her.
His face was now a mix of guilt and horror at his own words but Elen couldn’t understand why he hated her that much. Thorin tried to reach a hand to hold her arm but fear gripped Elen’s heart again and she took another step back. Unfortunately, the elleth tripped over a wooden log and fell backward. She let out a small scream of pain as a tick branch pierced through the flesh of her right arm when she collided with the floor. The company tried to help her up and Thorin tried to walk closer but she rolled on her side and got up quickly, tears still running down her cheeks.
“Lass, let me look at it.” Oin tried to reach for Elen’s arm but she quickly backed up and ran to grab her bag on the floor. She called for Shadowfax, feeling breathless and suffocating as everyone watched her. They all tried to stop her except Thorin. He knew that he had crossed the line with the elleth. He knew that he had make a huge mistake by letting his anger go on her.
“Elen, wait! Where are you going?” Bilbo tried to stop her but she did not glance his way.
“Lass, please. You’re bleeding.” Oin tried as well.
Soon Bofur also tried to reason with the elleth but she simply tried to hide her face from everyone until she was on her horse and ready to leave. Then, she turned her face to stare at Thorin, her eyes filled with tears but empty of all life.
“You once said that all you asked for was loyalty, honor, and a willing heart… that you could ask no more than that… But that’s not true, this is not enough.” Elentári said before turning away and Shadowfax bolted down the hill, taking her far away from the company.
Far away from Thorin Oakenshield.
Tell me what you think! 
xxx Lisy 
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monotype-on-phantom · 7 years ago
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this is my opinion, but i feel like sam's character was very stereotyped. literally her first words in the entire show were "i used to be into ghosts, but they're so mainstream" and in her next scene, she screams "WHY CANT THEY ACCEPT ME FOR WHO I AM?" just like a stereotypical goth/emo person, w no interest in anything popular. i love sam, but she would have been a much better character if butch hadn't focused more on making her so stereotypical.
I definitely see your point, but I think perspective plays a big part in this.
Does Sam act in a pretty stereotypical way sometimes? Yes, absolutely, but that’s not necessarily uncommon for a 14-year-old. When I was her age, I fell into a lot of stereotypes. My sister did, too. Like, gosh, the number of times I told my parents “nobody understands me!”
That is actually a thing I said. A lot. It’s very embarrassing to look back on.
When I think back to those years, most kids I knew fit into one stereotypical group or another. This doesn’t mean they weren’t complex people, but at that age, a lot of kids are just starting to figure themselves out. They may copy a lot of things they see that they feel they can relate to.
Sam does spout some stereotypical things sometimes, but she’s got a lot of uniqueness to her, as well. She’s passionate about the environment and loves animals. She has a favorite bookstore that she likes hanging out at. She likes action movies. She knows the delivery people who come by often by name. She’s a fan of A Clockwork Orange. She swaps cheat codes with other girls in online games. She has fashion tastes outside of just goth (she loved Valerie’s suit and the traditional Egyptian clothes Tucker stuck everyone in.) She’s not huge on popular things, but she does still enjoy Dumpty Humpty. She has a synthesizer in her room and was the one behind the idea of starting a radio station, meaning she has some passion for music. She has a record player and old records, which is an interesting hobby. She’s also Jewish, and uses Jewish terms and such on occasion. She named her “baby” after a Jewish demon. She loves the holidays. She celebrates Hanukkah, but she loves Christmas, Kwanzaa, basically any other holiday and gets chipper and excited around then because it’s just such a cool time of year. She actually does like some girly things, but she gets embarrassed about that because she’s got a goth image to keep up.
In a lot of ways, yeah, Sam’s the Goth Character and Vegetarian Character, but in other ways, she’s a very different take on those character types. Heck, I don’t see a lot of characters who combine those types. Some could say it’s conflicting, but so are a lot of people’s interests.
She’s just still growing and learning. She’s a young teenager who repeats things she hears that she relates to, but she’s got a lot to her outside of that. It’s just a matter of where you focus your attention and whether you see her as a character acting stereotypical or a kid being a kid.
I’m not trying to defend Elmer’s ideas for the characters, but the more I focus on what makes Sam stand out as a character, the more I enjoy her. Am I making excuses? Maybe, but this fandom seems pretty used to making excuses or ignoring certain things for the sake of enjoying the best parts of DP. Your opinion is still totally valid, but that’s just how I see it.
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