#but tbh it might also be symptomatic of some painful shit that he needed/deserved help with | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

good-to-drive · 8 months ago

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I totally agree with the general consensus that Ringo provided a lot of emotional support and coolheadedness to the other beatles to the point where they'd have probably killed each other without him but I do also wonder sometimes how much of that is being supernaturally patient and easygoing and how much of it is Ringo just having a tumultuous and isolated childhood where he was never taught to recognize and assert his own emotional needs so he became a blank slate on which others could process their emotions

(And tbh I also wonder how an inability to access or assert his feelings may have contributed to his tendency to process pain by numbing himself and the pretty shitty way he treated women)

#see also: george falling in love with his wife and paul routinely telling him he was easily replaceable #and yet ringo has nothing but warmth for either of these men #and of course I'm not saying we shouldn't appreciate how much patience and kindness that takes!#but also i guess it takes a certain lack of assertiveness or the ability to see/value your own emotions #and that's also something interesting to think about #speaking from experience here a lot of alcoholics want to be numb more than they want to be alive #and if ringo couldnt access his emotions it makes sense his only recourse would be to erase them #but i think for him it comes from isolation at a young age and a lack of emotional support #you need your caregivers to teach you what 'sad' is so you can then teach yourself what to do about it #or you may start to cope with that constant feeling of unease and dissatisfaction (that you can never quite grasp) in destructive ways #also his mom started getting him falling down drunk when he was not even twelve years old so tbh the alcoholism was probably inevitable #anyways all this is just to say that the fact that he could absorb pretty much infinite distress CAN definitely be construed as a virtue #but tbh it might also be symptomatic of some painful shit that he needed/deserved help with #ringo starr #longer rambles

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