#but tbh i was losing hardcore anyways sitting up so

[duskythesomething]

went to a friend's house today and we all brought something for dinner and we played the wii and talked for hours it was so much fun !!!

[jinkicake]

You Call Him Daddy?!

You accidentally call them daddy in front of the team. 

Aone Takanobu x Reader

Sawamura Daichi x Reader

For you, sweet Anon! I kinda rambled about Aone,,, uhhhh,,,, I just had so much to say about him! This is my first time writing for him and I had a lot of thoughts.... too many Aone thoughts..... I think his is the longest one I’ve written.... LOL bruh,, I was looking at my other posts and realized I have been spelling ‘accidentally’ wrong every entire time wtffff i-

SMUT

WC- 2,517

~~~

Aone Takanobu

Aone… is a service top,,,,, come on we all know he is

Like you cannot tell me this King wouldn’t treat you right, he is one of the ONLY haikyuu boys I would trust enough to marry

TBH mans doesn’t say shit and he isn’t going to say shit when you call him daddy in front of the team

The team though,,,, shit is going to go down like these mfs are going to combust

You have Futakuchi just standing there speechless with a proud look all over his face as he slowly starts clapping

And sweet Sakunami is like….. ‘did you guys hear sum….”

Ugh there is so much I could say about Aone….. like he would try to be sooo gentle with you just because he is a gentle person,,,, a sweet angel whose only concern is that no one will sit next to him on the train…. HOWEVER, despite as gentle as he tries to be this man still has power. Therefore,,,, you’re gonna get your guts rearranged, isn’t that nice?

Anyway,,,, let’s get into it!!

So basically….. it’s after practice and you’re there talking to Mai while waiting for the mf clowns to hurry up

And of course, Futakuchi wants to keep practicing a little bit so you’re like whatever fine,,,,,, since Aone was staying after too

You don’t really mind too much because Mai decided to stay a little longer as well but as soon as she left you grew tired fast, you had been sitting on the floor against the wall for over 40 minutes and all you want to do is go to sleep

You try to hold your tongue and not be rude because,,,, you don’t want to interrupt your boyfriend’s personal practice but gawwwwd were you bored

Instead, you innocently look around,,,,, innocently, however, your eyes keep going back to the tall blocker…. You glare at him so he notices your anger

Aone does and stares at you with a frown like he can’t figure out what he did wrong,,,,,,, you puff your cheeks out in retaliation

Behind him you see Futakuchi looking at you with a smug expression like 0.0 ,,,,,,, and then Aone looks at him disapprovingly

“What, I was just trying to join in on the conversation,” Futakuchi jokes and slaps Aone’s back before focusing back on the court

You’re like two seconds away from stomping your feet in retaliation,,,,, it’s nearly eight o’clock!!!

So with the anger of a very tired student, you begin walking around and cleaning up the stray balls

You start doing anything to hurry up their practice so you can finally leave with your boyfriend in tow, Sakunami gives you a thankful smile and you feel your irritation slightly diminish

There is something about the first year that you have just come to adore,,,,, not all first years though....

“Yo!” Koganegawa calls and you glance at him, your eyes widen when you notice the volleyball fly past your face. It misses you by a hair

You feel your eye twitch but still, inhale a deep breath to calm yourself down before turning to Futakuchi

“Kenji, when are you guys going to finish practice?” You ask sweetly and the captain looks deep in thought before shrugging

“I don’t know like 40 mins” He responds and you can’t help but whimper and gently stomp your foot, your boyfriend notices your change in attitude and glares at his friend,,,,,, “Fine like 10 minutes” Futakuchi groans and you have to hold yourself back from kissing your boyfriend senseless

That’s how you find yourself in the storage closet minutes later, placing the volleyballs in their respective corners

Aone follows closely behind you, not that you notice, and you nearly scream when you feel his arms wrap around your waist. Your boyfriend curls over your form to rest his chin on your shoulder, gently kissing your skin apologetically….. so he did pick up on the reason for your attitude!

You reach up and ruffle his light hair, giggling when you feel his smile against your neck

“Sorry I was acting so annoyed, I’m just really tired,” You tell him and his arms tighten around you

“That’s okay” Aone mumbles and you nearly melt, it isn’t often that you hear from him but when you do….. it makes you turn into a flustered mess

“I just wanted to go home, daddy” You whisper back quietly,, Aone pulls you flush into his chest and you squeak at the contact

However, when you hear a ball dropping behind you,,,,,,, you glance back in shock at the horrified first year

Sakunami opens his mouth to speak but no words come out, he slowly backs out of the closet and nearly trips when he runs away

“DADDY?!” Koganegawa mimics and Futakuchi pushes him out of the storage closet doors

“What are you talking about-“ He starts but cuts himself off but an impressed gasp when he notices your shocked face,,,, Futakuchi only smiles at his friends back and pretends to wipe a proud tear from his face

“You didn’t hear what you think you did….” You try and cover up but Koganegawa only repeats the word,,,,,, Futakuchi simply shrugs innocently

“I’ll give you your time alone,” He quietly closes the closet door and you sigh at the darkness

“Let me turn on a light-“ You start but Aone pins you to the nearest wall, his hands are gentle on your hips and you gasp at the suddenness of it all

“My love,” He starts and your eyes widen at the heat pooling between your thighs “stay quiet”

“Daddy, please. Please, please, please.” You beg, already taken over by pleasure. Aone continues to slowly thrust into you in a way that leaves you breathless and crying for more. His low grunts ring throughout the room and you whimper when you notice how his biceps flex with every thrust. 

Each stroke of his hard cock is so powerful that it nearly sends you into the headboard, you rake your nails along his ribs and tighten around him at the way his abdomen ripples under your touch. “I need more, daddy, please give me more.” 

Aone reaches down and rubs away the tears that spilled onto your cheeks with his thumb, he softly cups your cheek and leans down to kiss you. The kiss is a simple peck and you whine when he pulls away, however, your whines don’t last for very long. Your boyfriend picks up the pace and begins to snap his hips into yours, your breasts bounce with every thrust and you can’t help the way your voice shakes.

“Yes, yes, thank you daddy-“ You praise and moans of appreciation leave your lips so frequently, he is ruining you. There is something about the way he moves his hips so skillfully, how he thrusts into you so deeply but still manages to brush against your g-spot every time. It runs you up the wall and you’re so far gone you can barely focus on anything but him. 

Aone moves to rest on his forearms, leaning directly on his left side while his right hand reaches down to move your clit back and forth between his large fingers. His movements are slow and cautious, in a very teasing pace to build up the pleasure. Aone always winds you up so tightly before letting you snap, he is so focused on you. You mewl and arch your back, pressing your chest directly in his own, as he begins to rub circles into your clit. You open your mouth to say something but no words come out, that look in your eyes nearly makes his hips stutter and your boyfriend leans down to whisper his command.

“Cum.”

Sawamura Daichi

Let me start off by saying that all the captains have daddy kinks, no I will not be taking criticism

There is not ONE captain who doesn’t exude daddy energy…. I would love to see someone try to prove me wrong~~~ </333

Anyway,,,, Daichi is not called the dad of the team because he is mature and shit,,,,, no that is not the reason

Daichi is the daddy™ of the team, get it right, do I really have to explain this one

Like yessss feed us bitches who have issues with their fathers, yessss where my daddy kink bitches at? We are eating good tonight! 

Daichi isn’t my favorite daddy captain, it will always be Ushijima Kita, but lawwwwd he does make me act up

I thought about it for a while,,,,, how Daichi would react to being called daddy in front of his team and honestly,,,,, I don’t really know…..

His team is such a mess that instead of being embarrassed or anything he would have to calm them down because they’re losing their minds like he does not have the time to be embarrassed ya know

Daichi is a soft daddy,,,,, like come on you have a crazy mf like Sugawara and you expect him not to be soft 

Tbh I hardcore ship Daichi with that cute girl from the girls’ volleyball team like ugh her crush on him is sooooo cute,,,, idk why that is relevant I just wanted to point out how adorable and sweet they are ….. power couple!!

“He has a daddy kink,” Kiyoko points at the picture with the blonde in a yellow uniform, the two of you are going through the Spring High volleyball magazine

“Didn’t he hit on you one time, lucky bitch” You gasp dramatically and Kiyoko rolls her eyes before flicking your forehead,,,, it is only the two of you in the gym before practice starts

Your once shy friend is laid back and comfortable, out of her shell since it is only the two of you

“Daddy kink” She points to middle blocker daddy!matsukawa from Seijoh and you give her an approving nod

“Daddy kink” You then point to the ace ugh iwaizumi </3 and Kiyoko draws a heart over his face

“Daddy kink, daddy kink, daddy kink,” She begins pointing to numerous members from Seijoh “they all have daddy kinks”

“Somebody is eager,” You playfully flirt and she presses her fingers to your cheek to push you away

“Omg do Karasuno, please I need to know your thoughts!” You beg and flip to your own school’s team, Kiyoko looks at you cautiously before taking a deep breath in

She refuses to speak but points at Asahi and you nod in agreement “I believe so as well” You whisper and she chokes on her laughter

Kiyoko glances at you experimentally and then points at Daichi,,,,, she stares at you and watches as you try to hide your expression

“Well… not that I would know-“ You lie and she pushes your shoulder,, you dramatically stand up in front of her with your hands on your hips “Yes. He does have a daddy kink” and then Kiyoko laughs loudly, covering her mouth as she falls over and wheezes

“Girl fuck you, you expect me to fuck Daichi and not call him daddy?” You ask and she tries to wave you off

“(Y/N), I’m not judging-“ She cries, clutching her sides as you continue to scream random nonsense

“No, I do call Daichi ‘daddy’ and what about it? Tell me you wouldn’t also!” Your voice echos throughout the empty hollow gym and, not to your knowledge, outside the doors as well

Kiyoko continues to laugh loudly, her angelic laughter is something you know the second years would kill to hear, however when she glances at the open doors she immediately closes back up again

She grabs your wrist and pulls you to sit back down beside her, trying to act like you two weren’t just discussing what you call Daichi late at night

Someone clears their throat from the doorway and you glance up to see your boyfriend along with the other third years and a few second years

“H-Hey” your voice cracks and Kiyoko covers her face with the magazine to hide her laughter, her shoulders shake violently beside you “what are you guys up to?” You glance around the gym and try to ignore the silence

“Not much~” Sugawara sings and walks up to you, he grabs the magazine and points at himself before whispering, “daddy” he solidifies the secret with a wink and you burst out laughing

Kiyoko stands up and tries to hide her face into the wall to hide the way she is laughing so hard

“I can’t be here,” You choke and get up, walking past your boyfriend who stares at you with an emotionless expression

You know he heard everything~~

“Daddy,” You giggle as you continue to roll your hips on Daichi’s lap, you let out an exaggerated moan when you feel his cock harden beneath you. Teasingly you bite your bottom lip and flirt with his eyes, continuing to grind against him. Daichi simply ignores you and you move your lips to his neck, trying to get some sort of reaction from him.

You lick at his skin and release a muffled moan when you bite down on his skin. You’re acting so cocky right now, so driven by lust that you’re acting so foolishly in front of your boyfriend.

“Come on, fuck me.” You push your chest into his, purposely rubbing your breasts against him. Daichi leans forward and ghosts his lips over yours, pulling away whenever you get too close.

“Why should I fuck you when you’ve been nothing but naughty?” He asks and you bring your finger up to tap your chin before you laugh softly again.

“Hmm because I asked, daddy.” You lean up on your knees and press your lips to his, Daichi swiftly smacks your ass. His hand stings your flesh and you whimper but can’t help the smile that grows on your face from getting what you want. “Mmm just like that~” You laugh breathily and Daichi positions you down onto his thigh, you mewl at the feeling of his strong muscle pressed underneath you. His hand comes up to wrap around your throat, teasingly he squeezes the sides of your neck and watches the way your eyes cloud up at. “Yes, daddy.”

You try to kiss him once more but you’re unable to move due to the hold he has on you. Daichi continues to bring his hand down and spank you over and over, his slaps are harsh but you happily take them as you feel the liquid pooling between your legs.

“Do you have anything to say for yourself?” Daichi asks and his eyes narrow warningly at you, you pretend you don’t notice. You know he is referring to earlier today.

“I’m sorry, daddy?” You apologize but you can’t help but wonder if you really are sorry or not, you give him another cheeky smile and Daichi slaps your ass once more while cutting off your flow of air.

“You love your punishments, don’t you baby girl?” He asks and you nod eagerly. “I know, god, I’m going to fuck you so good.”

~ Taglist.

@yams046 @why-am-i-sad-and-sleepy @xhanjisungiex @xxashshs @chaosamu @angelkogane @augustdearly @kunimwuah  @lovellucy @osamuonigiri

[surflove808]

Can’t please everyone all the time, and I really don’t want to.  So, um....Hey there, extreme shippers!

I thought to myself, “Everybody is gonna hate me for sure now, because let’s face it - on Tumblr, you’re either on one side or another” apparently.  And I’m on neither.  So, if I lose a lot of followers, I’m cool with that.  You shouldn’t be following me anyway - I’m angry, I curse like a sailor and I don’t make gifs.  I’m just a rant machine at the end of the day, who very occasionally reblogs decent stuff.

Speaking of rants...I saw an big rant tonight about people being upset over the person confronting Jensen at JIBCON about his treatment of Misha that was in defense of the shipper, I think?   I was gonna reblog with my reply, but not worth it.  They don’t deserve to get dogpiled on.  Probably a kid.  And TBH, my response is way harsher than they deserve.

So, here’s my independent thoughts on this nonsense, and I think it applies to Cockles/Destiehellers as well as extreme J2 tinhatters.  I’m so sick of all this shit.  And frankly, some of you are giving me the fucking creeps.  And yessss, I’m tagging you.  How else will you see this?  It’s literally meant FOR YOU.

To a non-shipper like me, scrolling through Tumblr for the past 2 years has been very informative in a bad way when it comes to the whole concept of shipping in this fandom.  I initially thought it was harmless, even beautiful at times, until I started noticing that there was one common denominator (Jensen) and started to realize he was nothing more than the Superbowl ring between the Patriots and the Seahawks with some of you people.  Bottom line (and correct me if I’m wrong) As long as Jensen/Dean is fucking or being fucked by Castiel/Misha or Sam/Jared -  GAME ON.  Battle to the death, using a real, live human being as the prize.  

It really is a prizefight and it feels like if you’re not on one side, you must be on the other.   If I comment negatively on one perspective/bad behavior, I’m a BiBro.  If I swing too far the other way, I’m a “Destiheller”.  For christ’s sake I’M NON-DENOMINATIONAL when it comes to this dumpster fire.  No pun intended.

And some of you are fighting over it.  Really fighting over the rights to who gets to disrespect this guy/character and his family/co-workers/etc based on your fantastical interpretation of his sexual preferences/partners.

No respect for his privacy, his character or his personal capacity to make his own choices free from your Sauron Eye.  Because all that matters is that he’s dicking down with YOUR fave.  I get it - he’s stunning, he’s immensely talented, and let’s face it - he’d have “chemistry” with a cactus.  What’s the deal?  Is reality too much of an emotional stretch?  

This whole BiBros/Wincest/J2 tinhatters vs. Destiel/Cockles nonsense is such a mess. A swampy, shitpile of absurd motivation...I can’t wrap my head around it.  For the record:  I’m pro actor and pro people who can enjoy the show without inserting themselves into the private lives of these actors.  That’s it.  That’s apparently this blog now.  Because I’m so goddamned sick of this farce. 

Let's say that you're really into a t.v. show. Like REALLY into it. You fall in love, become invested and start following the actors via social media and conventions. Eventually you find you have immersed and invested yourself so completely in the professional and personal lives of a few of the actors, that the lines become blurry in your mind between actual fact, your version of the truth, and fanfiction. You feel familiar with them in a way that maybe you would with some of your own friends and family and start to fill in gaps (gaps that exist because you don't actually know these people) by using your vivid imagination. You might even be more invested in the interpersonal relationships of these actors than you are in your own. You want for things to be a certain way so badly, that when they're not (or don't seem to be), you feel personally aggrieved by it.  And fuck anyone who threatens that, be they fellow fans of the show, wives, co-workers, etc. The illusion of familiarity and ownership grows and grows until one day, you convince yourself that these people actually rely on your counsel and opinions with regards to their professional decisions/friendships/relationships, and you feel encouraged by your own (to quote Death) " Inflated sense of self-importance" to confront them or those close to them about perceived slights via social media, or in person at a convention, for example. There will be some support for your endeavor thanks to the shared psychosis you have with your fellow hardcore true believers. The French call it "folie a deux" (but x 1,000). And you will continue to galvanize each other to greater heights when it comes to inserting yourself into the personal lives of these actors. 

If you do this, you'll be a folk hero. People will write songs about you on Tumblr and Twitter! Conversely, there will also be plenty of people saying "What the actual fuck is wrong with you?" You will not like these people and you will feel they're only saying that because:

A: They're "haters” or “stans” for one actor more than another B: They "just can't take a joke" C: They're so blinded by hate for one of the actors that it's clouding their judgement. D:  They’re not evolved enough or smart enough to “look below the surface and see what’s REALLY going on”. 

You will continue to double down on your commitment to this "cause" because you haven't yet found a real cause that's worth fighting for. You will not listen to reason, be respectful of boundaries, or logic until you grow up and out of this obsession. It just takes time. I hope. And you will continue to take the SPN "Family" credo so literally, that you think you're in control of mitigating the personal and professional relationships of people who don't actually know you, and who you don’t actually know.  Like - at all. That being said, word on the street is - They DO care, they DO listen, and if some of you who fit the above description have accomplished anything - it's that you're now Crazy Aunt Dolores that no one wants to sit next to at Thanksgiving, but there she is, and somebody has to draw the short straw and listen to her conspiracy theories while trying to digest their turkey.  We’re all trying to be patient with Crazy Aunt Dolores, but that patience is wearing REAL thin.  At least it is for me. I’m already planning on what to wear to her funeral. Bottom line: These guys will continue to live their lives as they see fit, not how you do. You need to find a way to come to terms with that.

Certain fans will continue to twist scenes, words, photos, actions... fuck... even every minor, incidental shot of body language to suit their purposes, and I will continue to be absolutely amazed by the mental gymnastics happening on here that would/could do a world of good elsewhere.  

You can certainly invest more time. Precious energy. Keep devoting yourself to self-soothing by creating a cocoon of delusion when the truth runs contrary to your belief. Keep supporting yourself with as much content as you can find that lines up with your pre-existing notion about these people that are strangers to you. People who are unaware of your existence.  

And I don’t mean that in a crappy way, it’s a big world out there and you mean something to the people in your life - invest in THAT.  Invest in yourself as much as you do in these artificial romances/theories/whatevers and I promise you, I PROMISE you - you’ll be too busy and fulfilled to give a shit anymore. Now, off to take some of my own advice.

[changbin-froggy-jimin]

This is so long @frillyfairyprincess but I hope you like my ramblings

Moonlight:

Ok so moonlight opens the album and it’s got a really nice sound, the lyrics are so tough to get through though and especially this bit which hit a bit hard

I think we as listenerns, and especially as fans, especially as army, sometimes forget that there are people who are listening to what we’re saying but even more than that really have to hear it if that makes sense

If someone were to look at you and say “what you have created will last a lifetime” at first it’s nice right? Who doesn’t want to hear they’ll make it through the history books, but then the self doubt slips in ‘are you good enough for that, you can barely finish (in yoongi’s case a song) whatever your working on? Is this what you want representing you?’ I think things like that slip into being something kind of really scary and upsetting words like ‘legend’ are sweet and show our support but bts, are still human, with real feelings which I feel like a lot of people forget

there’s no one else doing it like they are, there’s no one to look up to, and especially no one even close to what they’re doing, they’re alone, they can’t really make new friends because: do they like you for you, or for your money, what human connections do they have besides each other that feel genuine? Probably not many, imagine going outside to be mobbed, I even saw this clip of some girl running up and kissing yoongi and probably scarring him like, this isn’t a cute life to live, it’s not fun, they like preforming but I think there’s obvious claims throughout the whole album of wishing with some part of him to give it all back

When people make arguments about how people who are successful ‘don’t have real problems’ and should ‘go cry in their piles of money’ I kind of lose it, I don’t know where all that empathy you claimed to have went to, but you should really shut your mouth until you have to wonder wether the person eyeing you in the store window is planning on chasing you down the street and potentially hurt you because of the things you make with your own hands, not to mention most of the kpop industry hates them, but that’s another point for another lyric

What Do You Think:

I’m kinda losing it over this because while I am 1. Not korean 2. Do not live in South Korea 3. Or obviously, do not know intricately the culture that comes with the music industry there

I have heard things, that because bts is with a smaller company, they were treated pretty bad on things like variety shows (and probably at some music shows but that I’m not sure about) because in Korea there are these three companies that were pretty unchallenged before bts came along, and the thing is some of that wariness is fair, being with a smaller label is I’ve been told, a real gamble on your chances of being mistreated, so a lot of people don’t want to support smaller companies when they know artists are safe with the bigger ones, and I’ve seen a group who was actually horribly mistreated who I actually listened to (TRCNG I think?) They were treated horribly by their label and so I don’t think people want to support that kind of thing

The issue is you’re also putting away groups like BTS, Monsta X, ATEEZ, MCND, Oneus, and more, of some of my favorite groups, and I think being not only snubbed for having a smaller label like Big Hit in Korea, but also being treated kinda badly in America by always being treated like kids or people who don’t do enough research about them and their music (which happens to every artist, but from the individual bts standpoint I still think it matters) it kinda gets under your skin in a bad way

Now, again, this is all stuff I’ve heard, it could be wrong but it is something I’ve heard from a couple of people and seems to be fairly accurate

Strange:

Now this one I’m exicited to talk about

So as a Twenty One Pilots fan first, and person second (seriously they’re my favorite band of all time) this line made me really happy

It reminded me of the song lane boy, it’s a song that deals with the expectations of the music industry for songs on the radio that play to sound a certain way

This line more or less is saying “sure we would make music the way you wanted, but if you were to die tomorrow, would we have been happy with what we created?” which I think is fairly hardcore, it’s also funnily enough the album Tyler (lead singer and writer) cursed the industry on is the one that got Him on the charts with 4 songs on the radio, one of them even had lyrics about never ending up on the radio it was great

Back to bts, obviously there’s a bit of a difference in the way things are done in America vs Korea, but think one could argue its more or less the same if you take out the training aspect, an artist comes and picks up a song, and is told how to dance, what their brand is, how to act in interviews, and bts still spits in people’s faces over stuff like that, which is why I think that they specifically have as big of a following as they do, because of the genuine way they present themselves

I think some of their music can be formulaic funnily enough, it’s honestly the reasons I sometimes have a hard time calling myself a fan, because there are those soft, what to me feel heartless in general, songs about how they’re so in love, soft flower pink kinda songs, here’s the thing though, even though I really dislike this kinda stuff, I can’t help but sit there and know they actually mean it unlike almost everybody else because they try hard, they genuinely mean it because they care for their fans, like, it’s fake in the fact that the lyrics mean nothing in their lives and I hate that kinda stuff, but they genuinely put effort into crafting lyrics that make people feel better and put at ease, and if it works for other people that’s fine I guess

But because we know their struggles, because we know how they feel, we know that when they say it’s going to be ok they mean it and all that mushy stuff bleh, I just prefer a different kind of song, but even their not super mushy stuff is super lyrically interesting and neat, I don’t really tend to strongly follow people who’s lyrics mean nothing to me, there are some artists I like because their music sounds good (EX: The Weeknd, ATEEZ...) but it’s always a passing interest because in the long run I don’t want to say it feels a bit hollow but yeah it kinda does

Bts has always felt genuine because I can look at them and tell they’ve been down a rough path, and because of that it comes out in who they are and what they sing/rap about so they’ve always seemed less formulaic than everybody else, even I still think bts feels like they have to put one of them songs on their albums, it still usually has cool sounds while still being super cool, like fake love for instance

I feel like I lost my point in there somewhere... sorry about that, anyways next song

Honsool:

Ok so, while above I said it’s stupid to dislike smaller label companies but sometimes Big Hit really concerns me DO NOT GET ME WRONG I think all label have this issues and it both really scares me and makes me angry because weight is such a problem not only in the music industry, or the actor industry, but in Korea, I know that’s rich coming from somebody who doesn’t live there, but at the same time it affects so many people who I’m scared for, not even just famous people but the kids and it makes me so sad

The issue with the bts label, is the specific fact that because bts doesn’t need to censor themselves to make Big Hit happy they talk about the issues that bother them with the company themselves and fans alike and aren’t afraid to say something, I still remember the Monsta X interview where IM said “let us go on vacation starship” with what kind of seemed like the hope that the fan base could bully the company into giving them time off (I honestly think MX is worked into the ground tbh)

The issue is we know know Jimin had/has an eating disorder and I think a lot of people think it came from fans/fan pressure but imma be honest with you I think a lot of the pressure came from the company

This is from rookie kind episode 4

It was filmed when bts were still basically babies in their first year im fairly sure, even before American hustle if I remember correctly, the thing is, before blood sweat tears era, every single one of them called each other various names and talked about weight all the time, and knowing what it did to Jimin it was always rough to watch, but to be honest I think it really affected all of them, seeing people say things to members constantly about what they’re eating (Ex: people telling JK not to eat food at night) it’s so upsetting?

The thing is, while watching summer packages/bon voyage Yoongi is almost always on some kind of diet, and it’s really kind of scary in a sense, and while I realize, that some of this could be metaphor, or even represent a different time in his life, because Yoongi does say he writes down the way he’s feeling and uses them sometimes years later, I think it’s really kind of telling that they were all kind of bullied into this ‘extremely skinny or nothing’ kind of mindset that’s so dangerous I really really am worried for all of them, I mean he did recently say that he stopped drinking and obviously this is what that song is about so there could have been any amount of time between then and now, even if I don’t think it’s a lot, sometimes I am really scared for them and what they do to their bodies

Dear My Friend:

I know I’ve been talking for far to long now, but this is just so bittersweet and sorrowful I just kinda love it a lot

[makeste]

Favorite BnHA OST Tracks

anon I never thought this day would come. (థ ｪ థ) 

I fucking adore this OST. and no one has ever asked me about it. which is fine, but I think we all need to just take a moment to acknowledge that the BnHA soundtrack fucking slaps. I’m not just saying that as a fan of the series; I’m saying it as objective fact. it’s up there with Zelda and Game of Thrones and How to Train Your Dragon. this soundtrack deserves all the love. and up till this point I’d resigned myself to loving it quietly, but now you have unlocked pandora’s box so I just hope you’re ready!!

I have... let’s see... six BnHA-related playlists right now lol. out of these, three are composed of tracks from the OST (the other three are my character-inspired playlists. wait, did I say three? actually there’s four of those. so seven in all. good lord). this soundtrack gets a lot of play, you guys. when I like something, I have a tendency to put it on repeat until I’m sick of it. so if I never get sick of it, you can imagine how that ends up going.

I was going to do a top ten of this, but then I went through the playlist and wrote down all my favorites and there were like thirty. I briefly entertained the idea of just saying FUCK IT I’LL JUST POST THEM ALL!!!!, but I had to sit myself down and lecture myself about having some goddamn self control. so I narrowed it down to like... twenty-three. and then finally down to seventeen. soo, it’s a top ten, plus seven honorable mentions. this is the best I can do guys. this is taking everything I’ve got, so please just humor me this once.

I promise this post won’t be super long. I’m not even gonna put it under a cut. I will restrain myself. okay here we go.

 10. Bombing King!!

Katsukiiiiii. I couldn’t not put this here, who the hell do you think I am. it’s perfect for him. it’s rowdy (I love how it just crashes in with those opening drums and guitar without so much as a how-do-you-do), but it’s got a real drive to it, and a fucking legit leitmotif that can be cut into sections and remixed in any number of ways (see: number 4). if you want to make it sad you can make it sad. want to make it even more badass, you can definitely do that. it makes me excited because there’s so many ways to play around with it for his future character development.

9. Cavalry Battle

this track makes me want to go out and cause a ruckus. it’s so full of energy and there’s an optimism to it, but like a clever, resourceful optimism. I love when the melody smooths out at around 1:14. it’s like, the team is coming together and we’re gonna kick some ass. they should play this in promos for the Olympics.

8. Nevertheless, Go Beyond

this makes me want to save the world. this one actually gets bonus points for the title because it’s so emotive, and somehow nails the exact feeling that the music manages to convey. even when you can’t go on, go on. you’re a hero. people are depending on you. get up.

7. All For One

ooooooohhhhhh my gooodddddddd. “The Power of All For One” is arguably the creepier track, but this one is more epic. it sends chills down my spine. he’s so fearsome. only the strongest of the strong can hope to defeat him. good vs evillllllll. god the bass in this is so good. and the vocals. and the frenzied urgency of the strings. and the Inception-stype WHOOOOOOOM at the end ugh.

6. Your Power

I almost went with “I Absolutely Won’t Use the Heat (Left)” because it’s so sad and haunting, but in the end this version won out because, as with the All For One track above, it’s the more epic of the two. I really consider them to be two parts of the same track though. anyways, so Todoroki’s motif is hands down the most haunting on the OST. fact. it’s so goddamn tragic?? and this version of it has that resounding drum beat that to me feels like a kind of grim determination. it’s a great track, and perfect for that theatrical Todoroki family drama lol.

5. My Hero Academia

this traccccccck. is so good. it makes me picture someone standing on the edge of a cliff at dawn looking down on the city below. it’s just got this kind of legendary feel to it somehow. this is an “only the beginning of the adventure” type of track. I also associate this with Iida unveiling his Reciproburst during the Sports Festival arc, because it was used so fucking well during that scene. “everyone, there’s less than a minute left...” I honestly get chills every time I watch that. it’s like quintessential BnHA.

4. Katsuki and Izuku

guys. I don’t want to throw the word “masterpiece” around all willy-nilly, but this. this, right here, is why I like character motifs so much. because you can play with them and wind them apart and together and bam, just like that you’re telling a fucking story. so anyways, in case you didn’t know, this track combines You Say Run/Jet Set Run (a.k.a. Deku’s themes) with Bombing King!! (a.k.a. Katsuki’s theme). bringing the two of them together through the power of music ffff why am I so weak to this shit. when You Say Run kicks in at around 26 seconds I fucking looooose it. then when Katsuki’s theme first joins in at around 52 seconds I lose it all over again. this is a better arrangement of it than Bombing King tbh. which is perfect, because the whole point of their story is that the two of them make each other better! anyways, they just complement each other so perfectly. IT’S LIKE THIS TRACK IS A METAPHOR FOR SOMETHING YOU GUYS. waiting on the anime to fucking use this in season 4, since it went unused in s3 despite them having all the opportunities in the world smdh. they might actually use it in the upcoming movie, come to think.

3. You Say Run

obviously. what else is there even to say. this is a fucking tour de force. chills every time. I know y’all came here for 2:05, but honestly the whole track is a rush from start to finish. I’m literally not exaggerating when I say that this music taught me the meaning of plus ultra. like on a spiritual level. music is cool. please don’t be mad at me that I only put it at third. if anything, that ought to tell you just how much I love the #1 and #2 tracks.

2. Hero A

I can play this on repeat for hours. not an exaggeration. this has the highest play count of any of my BnHA tracks. I’m not a naturally energetic person. I want to be, but I’m not. but this track is like a fucking life-hack to get you pumped the fuck up. and it’s so catchy, and it makes you feel so good, like you can really do anything. it might not be easy, but you can do it! I actually like the “you can be a hero/you say run” motifs in this track even better than the original tracks tbh. especially when it goes a bit quieter and then builds up again starting from 1:45, and then the percussion kicks in again, and it’s like something out of a Rocky movie. this track makes me fucking believe. it makes me want to try.

 and before we go to number one, here are some runner-ups. (by “some” I mean a fuckton more of them but my descriptions are shorter. compromise)

 You Can Be a Hero - the track that proved it’s possible to simultaneously make someone feel more inspired than they’ve ever been in their entire life while also causing them to ugly cry

Heroic Fighting Battle Song - why is the season 2 OST so fucking good

Go Seize It! - why is the season 2 OST so fucking good

The Threat of Offense and Defense - this theme makes me want to solve difficult puzzles very dramatically

Battle of Deku - this is just here because of Deku VS Kacchan part 2. I 100% associate it with that fight. it’s a great track, but it wouldn’t quite stand out among all the other tracks if it wasn’t for that. but that fight does exist, so now this track makes me think of rivals throwing down and it’s great

Yoarashi Inasa - specifically the part that starts in at 1:14. it’s like the Naruto and FLCL soundtracks had a really funky baby

People Always Reaching for the Top “the winner of the U.A. sports festival is...” the only reason this track isn’t higher is because I don’t feel like it stands quite as well on its own as some of the other tracks. but with context?? god. I love how this was used at the end of Bakugou VS Todoroki. it was just the perfect cue for that scene. so good.

 ...bonus runner-ups because I’m a fucking liar and have no self-control at all

 From Me to You - this is the one used when Kacchan joins the scooby squad. it’s quiet and sad and hopeful all at once. the perfect theme for something ending and something else beginning

Rampaging Evil - I associate this with Tomura. it’s badass and usually means that some hardcore shit is happening

Predecessor’s Sworn Friend - this track is some straight up Cowboy Bebop shit. badass grandpa gettin to work

 okay, without any further ado let’s finish up with number one

 1. One for All Vs. All for One

good. versus. evil. this is epic incarnate. how is it so good. I have so many feels about it oh god. it’s so desperate and so determined at the same time. it perfectly conveys this image of one person, almost at their limit, standing alone against something terrible, and somehow reaching deep within themselves to summon the courage to fight. it is beautiful. it is powerful as shit. it may just be the most heroic thing I’ve ever heard.

 so that’s my top ten twenty! rest assured, this is still leaving a lot out. like the rest of the entire goddamn soundtrack. god this series fucking spoils us.

[amphtaminedreams]

All The Tattoos I Couldn’t Really Afford

Hi to anyone who’s reading!

I thought I’d write about my tattoos a lil bit.

Partly because I’d like to talk generally about tattoos and what they mean for people who have dealt with self-harm and poor body image and partly because I get questions now and again about the more practical side of things; who did them, how much did they hurt and probably the most frequent one, how much did they cost (I mean, only my entire livelihood and every last spare pound I had for about 2 years but nbd)? The point being that I can put all this information in one place, especially as I don’t plan to get any more in the foreseeable future. 

See, as much as I get tired of people I don’t really know commenting on them, I suppose I did kind of bring it upon myself. Facially, I probably look about 15. I get told I'm exaggerating when I say that BUT I WAS STILL BUYING CHILD’S TICKETS ON THE BUS UP UNTIL LAST YEAR BC AIN’T NOBODY GOT TIME FOR £2.60 SINGLES. Where do you live for a bus single to cost £2.60 I hear you ask? In a tory heartland, my friend.

Anyway, the point is that I look pretty young to have a sort-of sleeve and tbh, I am. I’d say that for a lot of people, a sleeve is something you build on kinda throughout your life, not something you plan on getting pretty much the minute you turn 18. That isn’t exactly how it was for me either. I was more like 20 when I started on my left arm, lol. I started on the rest when I was 18 and had known most of the tattoos I wanted to get since I was about 14/15, so for quite a while. I think I always associated a tattooed version of me with a version of myself I liked and respected a lot more than the girl I saw myself as at that age,  but I didn’t realise just how true that would be. The tattoos definitely aren’t the reason I’m so much more body confident than I was back then; I’m at a weight I feel more comfortable in, I’ve learned how to do my makeup better and I think I’ve grown into myself more. Plus, I got my braces off, which helps. The constant fear of having food in my teeth hardly conjures up a sense of nostalgia, lol. On top of that, seeing a wider and more diverse range of faces and body types celebrated online and in the media has definitely helped me too. 

But one thing that I noticed is how much more respect having tattoos gives me for my own body. When you have talented men and women’s art all over you, it makes you feel like less of a body and more of a blank sheet. I think the attention moves away from the parts underneath that you might not like so much to something you don’t necessarily associate with yourself. It helps me to notice myself more objectively, with appreciation taking the place of scrutiny. And with regards to self-harm, on a practical level, I don’t want to damage somebody else’s hard work. 

The first tattoo I actually got, about a month or so after I turned 18 was pretty simple. I found the studio by way of recommendation from someone who’s tattoo I liked, which imo is probably the best route to go down for your first one. Word of mouth is generally a pretty good indicator of what to expect.

The 5 planet formation on the back of my neck was based on a Tumblr photo I’d saved on my phone, though in the original design I believe the planets were on the person’s chest.

PROTIP: If you’re getting a tattoo based on something you found on Pinterest, Google Images or Tumblr, the best thing to do is first to probably make a note of the artist and ideally ask them for their permission. This is something I wish I’d done at the time; the majority of my tattoos are based on images I found on the sites I just mentioned and saved without thinking and I generally deleted the photos once I sent them to the tattoo artist. Understandably, artists see it as respect thing to credit them and if I do ever come across the designs some of my tattoos are based on, I will of course make sure to add their details to this post, BUT to be completely honest, nobody outside of the internet is that bothered if you copied a tattoo you saw on Pinterest one time. 

I think the best thing to do is to ask your tattoo artist to put their own spin on a design and add to it, which is what I’ve generally done, and that way you should avoid anyone feeling like their work has been stolen. I like that approach anyway, especially if you’re going back to the same person for all your tattoos; it adds a consistency to them. 

This being my first tattoo, there wasn’t really much of a deeper meaning behind it. I liked the way it looked and wanted something simple that could easily be covered. I got this done by dclxvi.tattoo on Instagram, and it cost around £40. In terms of pain, there wasn’t much at all. I thought it was going to be a lot worse from what others had told me, and more than anything I could feel the vibration of the needle. I’d give it a 1/10 on the pain threshold. 

My second was the quote on my left side over my ribcage which reads “think deeply, speak gently, give freely and be kind”. This came from one of those cheesy typical middle class white people signs we usually put in our kitchens; we currently have about 6 and counting in ours. The full quote is “Think deeply, speak gently, love much, laugh a lot, work hard, give freely and be kind” but I thought that was a bit long winded so I kept the parts I liked. I suppose the meaning meaning of this is pretty self-explanatory, lol! When I was younger and still even now with the people I’m close to, I worry way too fucking much what people think of me. It’s a very cliche saying but at some point, I learnt that what others say about you says more about them than it does about you. From then, I started realising that as long as I know I do my best to treat people well, that’s the important thing and this tattoo is kind of just a reminder of that. IIRC, this one cost about £60 and was with the same artist as my first. She was really lovely and made me feel very comfortable so I went back to her for this one, and my next couple too. Again, even though it was on my ribs, I’d give it a 1/10 for pain.

I kinda lose track but I’m pretty sure it was over the summer of my 18th that I got the 3 you can see in the photo above, all still by the same artist. The first on this area of my arm was the quote “love yourself so no-one else has to” inside the heart/feminine symbol hybrid. Similarly, it’s quite self-explanatory but if I had to expand on it, it’s just a reminder that it’s not about what other people think and that as long as I’m happy in myself and BY myself, that’s what matters. This was around the £40 mark and I vaguely remember tattoos getting slightly more painful around this point as we’re getting into musclier territory. Not to make out I have guns or anything, lol, but I’ve always found that tattoos that are on top of muscle are the most difficult to sit through, still though I’d give it a 2/10 for pain. Shortly after I got the crystal ball with the quote underneath. The crystal ball is pretty much a copy of a tattoo I found on Pinterest by the tattoo artist Emily Malice/@emilymalice on Instagram:

I then chose a quote to add underneath it to make it my own which was: “it’s not in the stars to hold our destiny but in ourselves”. It’s the modernised version of a quote from the Shakespeare play Julius Caesar, and basically sums up the idea that if we want something, we have to go and get it ourselves. I’m not really a believer in fate or destiny or the idea that the universe has a bigger plan for us and though that might sound really pessimistic, I find it empowering in that we can go out and make our lives into anything we want them to be. Of course there are things that are out of our hands but for the most part, it’s down to us; I’m on that inner locus of control shit. And yes I remembered that from A-level psychology, lol. On the pain scale, also a 2/10.

Next was my Lana tattoo. Imagine copious amounts of the heart eyes emoji here. It’s based on this drawing:

Which I cannot find the artist of fucking ANYWHERE. The image is all over the bloody internet and returned about 30 different results on TinEye but I can’t for the life of me find the original version so if anybody knows, lmk! 

Anyway, it was my first of 2 Lana tattoos and it’s probably my favourite of them all. I’ve been a hardcore stan of this woman since I was about 12 and Video Games went viral (yes, I was a very pretentious 12 year old/general human being) and her music has been my soundtrack to EVERYTHING for the last 7/8 years. I’m a basic bitch and so Born to Die: Paradise Edition and Ultraviolence are still my favourite albums of hers but I wanted to pay tribute to the Lust for Life cover with the flowers in the hair because it represented her moving towards inner peace and contentment and I loved that. 

COST: approx. £70

PAIN: 2/10

That was my last tattoo for a while until about November 2018, from which point onwards I was getting them pretty much constantly up until a few months ago. I was no longer at uni, had a part time job and for the first time had proper disposable income, so I got my first proper “piece” tattoo:

This one I very shittily designed myself, though the lip part was based on this tattoo by Heidi Kaye/@heidikayetattoo on Instagram:

The lips were always going to be the centrepiece though it was originally a much bigger design. The idea was that it would be a piece based around the elements, water, earth, air and fire, with the things that represents each being something sentimental to me. Well, apart from the lips which would represent the passion of the fire signs; I just thought they looked cool, lol. On a less shallow note, the butterflies, which represent air (along with the moons), I associate with my mum as she’s always wearing butterfly patterned outfits and jewellery. Yeah, I don’t know how you can claim a whole ass insect either but apparently they’re her thing! And similarly, the scorpion is for my sister; it represents water, scorpio being a water sign. She and I used to watch Orphan Black together and took to affectionately calling each other “sestra” instead of sister like the Ukranian character Helena pronounces it in the show. At one point, I believe it’s season 3, her character hallucinates a scorpion (don’t ask, that show was pretty wack at times), hence the scorpion tattoo. Lastly, the flowers and the agate rock represent earth, which is the home of my sun and moon sign. There were originally going to be a lot more details to the piece but I wanted to keep it on the back of my arm and when I showed it to my new tattoo artist, Matt Cassy (cassytattoo on Instagram), he simplified it for me so that it would fit. It cost around £140 and took the longest time yet, but I’d give it a 1/10 for pain and it’s my favourite tattoo after my Lana one, probably because it’s the most individual.

Next after this was my sunflower and it took me to one of kindest and most talented people I’ve ever met! I’m pretty sure this was the first one she did for me and from this point onwards, I went back to Bianca Kidd (biancakiddtattoo on Instagram) for 90% of my tattoos. It’s a pretty basic piece but I really wanted a tattoo on my shoulder and preferably something that will never really go “out of style”. Flower tattoos are so simple but the absolute prettiest imo and I don’t think I’ll ever look back on this one and be like “what was I thinking?” I got Bianca to add the stars which were SUPPOSED to be in the form of the constellations of my sun, moon and rising signs, Capricorn, Virgo and what I thought was Scorpio but turns out is actually Cancer. Shoulda known considering how much of a needy, over-emotional twat I am, lol. On the one hand, it seems kinda contradictory to my crystal ball tattoo quote to believe in astrology but on the other, I think there might be something to the time of year a person is born and the environmental factors that come with that (climate, financial patterns etc.) affecting a person’s temperament slightly. It could all be a load of BS, considering the vagueness of most star signs and our tendency to want to agree with positive statements about ourselves, and I DEFINITELY don’t believe in the stars having any impact on your future or fate but it’s still fun to read about either way. Would be even funner if I didn’t have regrets about getting my natal chart wrong and being sure enough that Scorpio was my rising sign to get a tattoo referencing it every time I did, but there you go. If anyone asks, the placement of the stars is TOTALLY. RANDOM.

COST: approx. £140

PAIN: I find that even if a tattoo isn’t in a super painful position, your skin begins to get a little raw and thus more sensitive when it’s under a needle for a long period of time so 3/10

Next was the snakey boy on the inside of my right arm which I got just before Christmas, again by Bianca:

I don’t have much to say about this one other than it’s pretty much a copy of one I saw on Pinterest that I’d saved quite a while before (unfortunately I can’t find it anywhere now but if anybody does know the source lmk!) because I fricken love snakes and think they’re cute and misunderstood af. Not as cute as cats but definitely up there. Bianca changed it slightly by adding the dots around the rose and we went from there, and the main thing I remember is that this one actually hurt. Close to the armpit and on top of the muscle is a bad combination and I’m totally in awe of the madmen that go right into the pit itself. It cost £80 and for pain I’d give it an 8/10. 

Cop the exact same pose only with the other arm instead, but I also got my mermaid around this time:

She was done by Polly (biffinx on instagram) who’s an apprentice tattoo artist. If you are looking for a slightly cheaper tattoo, apprentices are a good shout, as they usually charge slightly less, though in Polly’s case are equally as skilled at what they do; you’re also helping them build their portfolio so it’s a win-win situation for both you and the tattoo artist. That being said, make sure you do your research and get someone who’s good at the style you’re looking for before you commit. Instagram is often your best bet, and if not, tattoo shops often have websites with photo galleries showcasing each artist’s work. It might take you a while to find what you’re looking for but you really can’t compromise when you’re talking about something that’s probably going to be on your body forever. NBD. I got the mermaid as a nod to both growing up by the sea and how much I loved to swim when I was younger. I feel like I’m going to end up saying this far too many times but she’s one of my favourites. 

COST: £60

PAIN: 8/10

I also got the other 3 tattoos on my upper right arm during this time. Bianca did the satanic kitty (can’t find the source of the tattoo it was based on! again, if anyone does lmk!), because of course I had to have a cat tattoo, and that was around £50 and a 3/10 on the pain scale. The two shells, which again are a reminder of where I grew up, were done by Terry Weeks (terryweekstattoo on Instagram) and cost £70 for both. I’d give them a 2/10 for pain.

Next were my knee and calf tattoo in February of this year, for which I went back to Matt Cassy:

He did the two of them for £140 and it took around 3 hours. Palm trees always remind me of California which I absolutely love, and the spider’s web was kinda just because...spooky, ya know? Honestly, I hate spiders and I equally hate that it gave the old man on the bus the inspiration to make the joke (imagine this being said in a strong Dorset accent) “you’ve got ae spiderr on yerr leg” at me that one time on the bus. Plus, I’d give my knee tattoo a strong 9/10 for pain. Realistically, it probably wasn’t any more painful than the inner upper arm tattoos but you have the added burden of suppressing your reflexes; when somebody is carving into the skin on your leg, it really shouldn’t come as a surprise that your knee jerk reaction is to...well, kick that person in the face. Or away from you at least. I also got the elbow pit tattoo on my left arm from Bianca around this time for £160. 8/10 for pain on that one.

And then, there was the 10/10 in March. The things I do for Miss Lana Del fucking Rey.

Because the Just Ride tattoo above my knees HURT. I wasn’t expecting it at all but BLOODY HELL. My tattoo artist actually had to get the numbing spray out for this one. It was, again, the combined effect of it being on top of muscle and the need to resist my reflexes so that I didn’t flinch, which clearly I didn’t do a very good job at, hence the spray. I think my reaction at the time was kind of, what the fuck, has this stuff always existed? But the more you can put off asking for the spray, the better, because used in large quantities it can be pretty dangerous. This was the only tattoo I felt I did need it for because I literally couldn’t sit still and there was a risk of me jogging the tattoo artist, Megan, the amazing @bunnystattoos on Instagram. Her stuff is adorable and she has such a strong vision and brand and if I was going to get another, I’d love to just give her a starting point and see where she’d take it from there. Like, I’m not a Star Wars fan but LOOK at this set she designed for someone else:

I also got my Dream On tattoo with her in the same session and in total she charged me £110 for both which is pretty reasonable considering how in demand she is (and how much of a total baby I was about the Just Ride tattoo). I chose lyrics from Ride because lyrically, it’s probably one of my favourite songs of hers, plus the opening 30 seconds are pure magic.

Megan also did the linework orchid lady on the back of my arm around the same time:

I suppose you could say this is my most “meaningful” tattoo, because it was inspired by something my care-coordinator said to me about my diagnosis of BPD. In amongst all the other less than complimentary comments, she told me that it just means we need a little more care and sensitivity than others, like orchids do in comparison to other flowers, but that that doesn’t make us any less deserving of care or less beautiful. Basically, in the right circumstances, we can bloom too. And I liked that. 

This one cost £80 and was about a 3/10 for pain. I can’t find any photos of the tattoo it was based on so for the millionth time, if you do know, hmu.

From April-May I got a shitload of tattoos and to be honest, I can’t really remember what order it was in so I’m going to group them into artists. First, the ones I got from Polly:

The anatomical heart I got in March and was based on this tattoo by Harry Plane (@harry.plane on Instagram):

COST: £50

PAIN: 7/10

And the sun and moon kissing was also around £50. 2/10 for pain.

Bianca did a few for me too, starting with the floral design on my lower left arm around March, which was probably my biggest piece yet:

The floral piece started off as a 4/10 though it creeped up to a 6 the closer it got to my wrist. Going over raised scars is also slightly more painful, something to bear in mind. Along with the Keep It Cute tattoo (6/10) on my wrist:

It came to £180. 

Bianca also did the linework of my favourite GIF, like, ever.

Yes, it’s Go Go Yubari from Kill Bill about to try and maim The Bride, who don’t get me wrong I am perennially rooting for, but come on. It’s an iconic moment in film history Once Upon a Time in Hollywood wishes it could replicate. 4/10 for pain due to it being over scarring, otherwise we’re talking about the kind of placement that’s a reliable 2/10. I also got wrapped into the whole renaissance inspired trend and got Bianca to do me a little cherub gap filler based on this flash sheet I found on Google Images (link to the image found here https://creativemarket.com/Sonulkaster/280110-Angels-and-Cupids-collection.?utm_source=Pinterest&utm_medium=CM):

I suggested the cigarette as a cheeky little addition, lol! I’d give it a 5/10 for pain, being close to the inside of my arm n all and it set me back around £40. Unfortunately, I don’t have any great quality photos of it that I haven’t already used in the post but here’s one where you can see it a little bit (idk why my hair looks so brown and basically my natural colour in this photo but I DO NOT APPROVE, it is not at all fitting with my wannabe mildly goth aesthetic):

Finally, we have my last 2 tattoos.

See, getting my finger tattoos done was an absolute necessity before I went inter-railing and not because I’m an over-dramatic bitch who wanted a little something to make my multitude of me-holding-food photos more aesthetically pleasing (though of course it helped on that count), but because I made the fucking huge mistake of trying to stick and poke them myself. To be fair, they weren’t THAT bad at first. Like I was pretty pleased with them. Buuuut they faded super quickly and I guess that’s the issue with stick and pokes, especially on your fingers, where even professional tattoos are a bit of a flight risk anyway. So, after having to go over them a million times and spilling Indian ink all over my laptop keyboard, I decided to admit defeat and get Bianca to go over them for me. It cost £30 and I’d only give it a 4/10 on the pain scale. After months of having to explain my shitty faded finger tattoos to everyone and convince far too many customers at work that they weren’t just drawn on with a sharpie, I’m finally happy with them. Lesson learnt. Don’t stick and poke kids, especially not near your laptop.

Lastly is my “Wouldst Thou Like to Live Deliciously?” quote that Polly did for me:

The cost of this tattoo? £30. Having to explain to every person who hasn’t seen The VVitch what it actually says and then what it means too? Priceless. Hotel? Tri-

I joke. It’s actually very annoying having to explain what it says and vague what it means, not because I don’t EXACTLY know but also because I feel like a snobby film hoe (which is quite an accurate description of me) every time I do. The VVitch is super good, guys. Please watch if you’ve got the patience, it’s a slow burn. 

Anyways, I hope anybody who read to the end enjoyed the post and found it informative! If you have any other tattoo questions, shoot me a message and I will definitely respond. I think one of the most common things I get is people saying they’re too indecisive to get a tattoo and that they want one, but are worried they’ll go off it. What I think is that once you get your first, getting a tattoo starts to feel like less of a momentous decision. Like there are tattoos I have that I probably wouldn’t get now but that doesn’t mean I regret them because, although it sounds cheesy, they sort of become a part of you and represent what you liked at the time. The more you have, the less significant one individual tattoo is. At the end of the day, are you ever going to regret getting a tiny rose? Worst case scenario, you can always get a cover up or if you’re brave and rich enough (lol), get laser removal. In terms of aftercare, I’ve always been kind of sloppy. Follow the instructions your tattoo artist gives you but also, if you don’t get time to moisturise them, it’s not the end of the world. TRY not to itch them but one tiny scratch isn’t going to permanently damage your tattoo. 

One thing I will say, though, that’s probably kind of obvious to everyone but me (being the dumbass I am) is that you should NOT go in the sea right after getting a tattoo. It is literally the equivalent of pouring salt in an open wound and whilst it didn’t ruin my Lana, it really fucking stung for about 3 days afterwards. I’m an endless treasure chest of protips, didn’t you know?

Thank you for reading!

Lauren x

[whatjeon]

high school student!jungkook

genre(s): headcanons/bullet points, high school!au, (low-key) fuckboy!au, (a smidge of) badboy!au, friends to lovers, slow burn (??), a lil bit of angst, kinda crack-y, basically an emotional rollercoaster

warning(s): strong language

A/N: hello friends i am back not with an imagine but a bunch of bullet points i’ll try and pass off as mini-paragraphs!! anyway, i’ve been thinking about this a lot so i figured that i might as well publish something if i want to keep calling myself a “writer”... enjoy!! p.s. sorry not sorry for all the cliches and shitty humour LOL

high school student!jungkook au 

jungkook’s the new kid at your high school and moved into your neighbourhood during the summer of your sophomore year

lives in the big-ass house with a pool and indoor theatre bc his dad’s some music producer or something

honestly you had no idea he had moved in until the first day of school and even then, you had no clue what the fuss was about (but that was partially due to the fact that you hadn’t seen him yet lol)

he’s hot af and he knows it too which makes him hella cocky

he strolls into every single class with one hand in his jean pocket and the other either: a) running through his perfectly-gelled black hair or b) loosely holding onto his backpack strap

you’re sitting in AP psych with your five thousand pencils and highlighters out on your desk ready to clutch that A for the semester when he saunters in whistling

as soon as you see him walk in you know that he’s a fuckboy™

timberlands? check

light-washed jeans? check

plain white tee? checkcheckcheck

when he catches you looking at him (not that he could blame you like tbh everyone was checking him out) he winks at you and flashes you a smirk before sitting a couple seats behind you

by the end of the day you learn that you have AP psych and AP econ with jungkook

he’s quiet in class but you know he’s smart because the first thing your AP econ teacher has you guys do is participate in a game of kahoot as a diagnostic test. you sit behind jungkook so you’re able to see his laptop screen as he clicks on the right answers. he actually places first in the entire class and surprise surprise !! you end up placing second thanks to jeon jungkook the econ god

the next day at school you’re at your locker taking out your textbook for your math course when jungkook stops by and leans against the one next to yours and goes like “i believe you owe me a thank you, hmm?”

and you’re like “for what?” bc you genuinely forgot all about the kahoot test

jungkook laughs, tilts his head to the side, and as he’s glancing at your eyes he says “econ?”

in that moment you realise jungkook is not only attractive but also really really observant

“oh,” you say, shrugging and closing your locker. “thanks, i guess. see you around... jungkook, right?”

his finely-chiselled jaw drops and he’s like who does this girl think she is omf i’m literally the talk of the school AND WE HAVE TWO CLASSES TOGETHER

all he can do is smile (not as smugly, though, since you just ended the conversation) and push himself off of the locker he was leaning against

as he turns to go to his next class he can’t help but wonder who you really are because he’s a masochist you don’t take shit and you’re... kinda cute actually

the next day in psych jungkook’s hardcore flirting with you because he is determined to prove that there’s no way any girl on earth can resist jeon jungkook 

from behind you hear a pencil tip snapping followed by jungkook’s smooth voice cursing “oh my god i don’t have a spare” and being a nice person you turn around and hand him one of yours

as he takes the pencil his fingers brush against yours (ON PURPOSE!!!) and he winks at you before saying “life without you is like a broken pencil... pointless”

you send him an unamused smile and retort “your efforts are like a broken pencil. nice try, jeon”

the nickname sticks and you proceed to call him jeon for the next four months of school

jungkook likes how you’re not madly in love with him like the majority of the school so he makes even more of an effort to talk to you and get to know you during your classes and you become pretty good friends (??) if you can call it that

it’s really more like close acquaintances who can flirt joke around with each other

sometime in october jungkook asks you why you keep calling him jeon instead of jungkook and you tell him that he’s not worth two syllables (but in reality it’s because you think his last name sounds really cool... also the corner of his mouth always twitches upwards when you do but you aren’t ever mentioning that to him) and all he does is laugh because it’s refreshing to have a girl roast him instead of fawn over him, especially since he accidentally flashed his abs at basketball try-outs whoops

time skip ! it’s november and exams are coming up in a week so you’re studying for hours on end almost every day, sleeping late and waking early until one day you sleep through your alarm

you’re rushing out the front door and getting on your bike when you hear a “y/n!” behind you

surprise!!! it’s jungkook on his motorcycle (ofc he has a motorcycle lmao)

he’s like “wow, little miss honour student late for school?” and you leave your bike on your front porch before putting on the helmet and retorting with “can you just stick with an aesthetic?? you’re clearly a fuckboy–– only bad boys own motorcycles”

jungkook bites his lip to hide his grin but the urge to smile is so strong that he has to look down at his vans so that you can’t see just how happy you make him

you’re five minutes away from school when you realise that he isn’t wearing a helmet because he gave you his and your arms instinctively tighten around his waist

jungkook almost chokes, which is unlike him because he’s jeon jungkook, one of the most attractive boys at your school and #1 fuckboy, and he’ll be damned if he starts falling for some random girl just because she’s arguably one of the hardest-working people in the grade and her eyes remind him of stars and when she laughs it’s like honey drizzling on top of pancakes on a sunday mor–– and that’s when jeon jungkook realises he likes you

WHICH IS WHY as soon as you guys get to school he walks away and flirts with the first girl he sees

you’re like “ok???” but hella confused and low-key jealous mad

littLE DO YOU KNOW that as soon as you’re out of sight jungkook’s face goes from ;) to :( because he doesn’t want to flirt with anyone else except you

school ends and you walk through the parking lot to get to the main road when jungkook spots you and rides his motorcycle over, tossing his helmet at you

“get on, y/n. we’re going home”

and you ask him why bc you’re still kinda pissed about what happened that morning and he says “it’s what friends do” even though calling whatever it is that you have “friendship” feels wrong and just a little bit painful

from that day on jungkook drives you to school and back every day on his motorcycle (after he promises you that he’ll get a second helmet), even on days where his first class is a free period and he technically could wake up an hour later than usual because homeboy is hopelessly in love with you

it’s spring AKA track season !! jeon jungkook, the golden (ex)fuckboy (you can’t be a fuckboy if you only flirt with one girl sorry jeon) of your high school, makes the ~varsity~ team

which means he can’t drive you home after school because you don’t do a spring sport :( but you’re cool with it

this is also the time when you become really close with another notorious fuckboy who lives in your neighbourhood, kim taehyung, except there’s no sexual tension between you two because taehyung is a good bro™ who just likes to get it on sometimes ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

one day jungkook sees you and taehyung walking home together when practice is canceled and he is JEALOUS AF

he knows he’s being irrational but going home together is you and jungkook’s thing !!! not you and taehyung’s thing !!!!!

so the next day he goes to “talk” to taehyung bc he doesn’t want you to know he’s jealous and basically tells taehyung to “get the fuck away from y/n or else” and taehyung smirks and refuses bc he’s a little shit

aaaaand you’re just chilling during your free period when a friend tells you that your mans jungkook and taehyung are fighting in the quad

the fight gets broken up as soon as you enter because 1) jungkook doesn’t want you to see him all violent and 2) taehyung actually really likes being your friend and doesn’t want to mess things up that badly

but the damage is done and people are already talking about how y/n, a notorious goody two-shoes, is dating jungkook and taehyung at the same time and they both found out, leading to their fight at the quad

you ignore jungkook and taehyung for the rest of the day for damage control but it’s useless and your “perfect” image has been tarnished

you head over to jungkook’s house after he’s done with track practice and chew. him. out. 

which then turns into a full-blown argument

“everyone thinks that i’m a fucking whore now thanks to you and your goddamn temper, jungkook. honestly, can you grow the fuck up?”

“well you didn’t have to go around doing who knows what with taehyung, y/n”

“as if you’re any better”

you guys are screaming at each other and the argument ends when jungkook finally loses his composure and yells “then why don’t you just fucking leave and never come back, y/n?”

so you angrily storm off, tears welling up in your eyes

the next morning you wake up feeling awful and you have half the mind to skip school for the day, but then you remember that you’re a high school student taking multiple APs so skipping class is waaay out of the question

you’re about to head out the door when you remember that jungkook isn’t there to drive you to class anymore :( so you have to go from the back door to the bike shed and take your old bike out

when you emerge from the backyard you see a figure dressed in a black hoodie and grey sweats (classic fuckboy™ clothing), leaning against his black motorcycle with his hands in his pockets, staring intently at the ground

you’re in front of him when he finally looks up

his brown eyes widen and he clears his throat nervously but you speak first because you got 0 sleep last night and seeing him look so soft and just him being there in front of your house even after a huge fight makes your heart swell

“i didn’t mean what i said yesterday. well, i did mean some parts but i never meant to use my words to hurt you. i was mad and being irrational. i’m sorry. you mean so much to me and i just–– i’m pretty sure i’m like, in love with you and oh my god did i just say that? i mean––”

and jungkook’s speechless but also relieved because then that means he doesn’t have to do the confessing first

what he does do first is kiss you in the middle of your rambling because 1) he loves you too and 2) he doesn’t want you to embarrass yourself any further lol

when the two of you finally part he just smiles really softly at you and pull you in for a tight hug

“i love you too, y/n. i’m still a little mad, though”

and you’re like oh boy, here we go but then jungkook smirks, tightens his hold on you, and says “i can’t believe taehyung is the reason why we finally confessed to each other”

when you and jungkook walk into school together with your hands tightly clasped together everyone is like POWER COUPLE ALERT because the ex-fuckboy and goody-two-shoes are actually dating ?!!

bonus: you guys are voted prom king and queen wow stan legends stan jungkook and y/n

extra bonus: taehyung is your ship’s #1 fan and president of the unofficial jungkook+y/n fanclub

[catchinggmybreath]

Hey how do you cope with your chronic pain? Mine is Really REALLY bad rn, i’m just laying in bed with my heated blanket, crying, it hurts. So bad.

hey dear, sorry this is such a late reply :/ tbh i’ve been hardcore dealing with chronic pain too and it sucks and i wanted to be in a good state to answer so it didnt sound like i dont care (which i 100% care, it just wouldnt seem like it when i’m drained and don’t have energy to put in much effort into a reply)

i mean it kind of depends on what your chronic pain is, where it is, why its happening, etc. But the things that help me are normally

staying active, even if it’s sometimes painful. if you lay in bed all day everyday, you’ll lose muscle mass and become weak, making yourself more susceptible to being in more pain when you do need to move around. (not that laying in bed is bad, especially later in the day when you’ve been moving throughout the day and the pain is worse. but try not to always be resting.)

honestly, music. laying in bed listening to music can be soothing and distracting from the pain.

idk if you have a bad back like me, but i have a pillow that i’ve found supports my back really well. I’ll sit up in bed with the pillow and watch netflix or work on blog posts or anything you can do while sitting and not moving much. that way you dont get bored and start thinking about your pain too much.

i guess just distractions in general help. the more you’re stressed, the worse the pain is. and boredom leads to overthinking which leads to stress. so i guess anything distracting or de-stressing. 

anyways im no good with this type of thing, i’m still trying to find ways to cope, and i completely relate to laying in bed with heat and just feeling awful. i really really truly hope you figure out a solution to your pain.

[esseastri]

Megan Reads Oathbringer (part 3)

Didn’t even stop for food; that part was just getting so long.

Part Three encompasses pages 144-240 (previous parts)

I promise I’m not going to stop each liveblog part every time I get to a Shallan chapter. I promise. 

OH MY GOSH I’M LAUGHING SO HARD I CAN’t BREATHE

SHALLAN ASSUMING THE KNOCK ON HER DOOR IS PALONA NAD ADOLIN WALKS IN

1. ADOLIN BROUGHT HER DINNER WHAT A SWEETIE

2. SHE’S IN HER FRIKKIN NIGHTGOWN

3. HE ALMOS DROPS HER DINNER BECAUSE OH NO HER SAFEHAND

I’M DYING THIS IS FRIKKIN HILARIOUS I LOVE ADOLIN SO MUCH I LOVE ADOLIN AND SHALLAN TOGETHER THIS IS TOO FUNNY

“In my defense, you did invite me in!” SHOUTING THROUGH THE DOOR LIKE A GRINNING FOOL I LOVE THEM??

“Back of your left thigh, eh? What’s a girl gotta do to sneak a glimpse of that?” SAYS THE WOMAN WHO JUST FREAKED OUT AND WRAPPED HER SAFEHAND IN THREE LAYERS OF CLOTH WHILE BLUSHING FURIOUSLY TWO SECONDS AGO OMG THESE NERDS

He’s so genuine in how much he likes her. hello, fronds, I LOVE THEM

“Your ego doesn’t count as a separate individual, Shallan.” GOD BLESS

Pattern + math jokes = Good

The fact that both Pattern and Syl have been “studying” um...mating. is REALLY HILARIOUS

otp: NO MATING

THAT’S THE CUTEST KISS EVER I’M GIGGLING THIS IS DELIGHTFUL

Did you guys know that Kaladin is A Good?

what a good.

also, I’m worried about the parshmen. That’s not stormform--I’m assuming workform or nimbleform??--so...the storm gave them the ability to change forms again, I’m guessing? But they don’t know what to do with them. And it didn’t force them into stormform, which is why they didn’t attack, but...what does this mean?

Adolin!!! you nerd!!! he’s so excited about training her to fight!! omg “I brought the Blade guards, lemme go grab them RIGHT NOW” THIS NERD

“I can die. They will send you another to bond.” BBY NOOOOOOOO

Someone hug Pattern, please

Also hug Shallan?? maybe? girl, panic attacks SUCK I know how you feel, just breathe, babe, just breathe...

girl really needs to Deal with some shit. Get her a therapist, someone

Adolin is a good and patient boy who is genuine and wonderful, and I love him.

...whoops, I totally forgot about the Honorblade. heh

The fact that Dalinar is hiding the honorblade in the sewer pipes is delightful to me.

I miss Bridge Four.

Though this new guy from Bridge Thirteen seems chill. and funny.

except I don’t trust him? do we know him? are we sure he is who he says he is?

I’m concern

Dalinar stripping to his waist to wrestle people is hilarious to me?

OH. I didn’t realize the Thrill was an Alethi-only thing. huh. that’s still...it’s still bad, but idk if it’s worse that it’s only Alethi or better that it’s not spread to everyone.

they use terms of endearment and the term of endearment is gemheart I’m dying that’s too adorable

that was...a very interesting conversation about tradition and religion and how the two tie together. I’m particularly interested in the idea that “just because it’s tradition doesn’t mean it’s worthy; just because it’s old doesn’t mean it’s right.” I feel like there are a lot of real-world applications to that sentiment that could do with exploring...

ooohhhhhh snap OOHHHHHHH DALINAR USING STORMLIGHT THE FIRST TIME OOOOHHH

oh, Adhesion, of course. I’m genuinely curious to see what his other one does. Tension, isn’t it? How does that work hmmmmmmmmm gimme magic system answers aahh

AAAHH WHAT

EVI

WHAT

HE REMEMBERS!!!!

is it ‘cause the Stormlight “healed” his memories? Stormlight magic cancels out other magic--Nightwatcher magiOH OH MY GOD THAT’S WHY LIFT IS AGING ISN’T IT? SHE ASKED THE NIGHTWATCHER TO NOT GET OLDER BUT THE STORMLIGHT MAYBE ERASED THAT MAGIC?? MAYBE?? I FEEL LIKE THIS IS A THEORY THAT IS HIGHLY PLAUSIBLE SO I’M STICKING WITH IT.

gaahh parshendi kiddos aahh no they’re cute this is A Lot

nnnnnnnnngggggg Kaladin thinking about his escape attempts aaaaAAAAAHHHHH

“That had been his most successful escape attempt. It had lasted five days.” AAAAAAHHHHHHHHH I’m

He’s so. strong. He’s come so far. He suffered so much I just. AAAHHH

aahh, Kaladin’s first instinct when Syl is ignoring him is “oh god, I messed up something’s wrong with the bond” and that momentary panic is SO MUCH HE’S SO MUCH I’M

....parshman radiant? or?

but it’s yellow

so how is it Voidspren? unless the black sphere isn’t voidspren...

...........Odium’s champion is golden. maybe.

hm.

HHHMMM.

KALADIN IS SO GOOD

HE’S SUCH A GOOD

Mmmmmmmmmm Shallan attempting to do alcohol is. really second-hand embarrassment-y.

I’m very uncomfortable.

someone stop her

I feel like Shallan keeps rolling 2s on her Investigation checks, but then 18s on her Charisma checks to back it up. She’s the worst at this, but she’s convincing anyway.

Also, I looooove that Stormlight clears up alcohol, it’s the best.

EW SHALLAN WTF

WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT

AAHH WHAT THE. GAAAHH YOU CAN HEAL YOUR HAND BUT HE CAN’T HEAL HIS UGH OH GOD WHY

okay

welp. good to know that everyone is scared of the Ghostbloods....

also maybe she shouldn’t just be spreading that association around quite so freely....

mmmm okay wth. what is the copycat murderer. some kind of illusionist, if they can pretend to be someone else so fully that even the ring impression is there....hmmmmm......

ALSO I FORGOT BUT A LIL BIT AGO, Shallan said something about not ever being able to actually fake being these people until she’d lived their lives or lived among them or smthn, and part of me is like AH GOOD SHE IS LEARNING and part of me is like “congrats on the stunning realization that darkeyes are people too” *rolls eyes*

But no, seriously, I’m glad she’s realizing these things, and at least beginning to understand that she’s coming from a place of hardcore privilege and is starting to understand what that means for her.

God, the fact that Ialai and Sadeas used to ply their political prowess and manipulation powers to get people to fight Dalinar so they could eliminate people without the use of assassins is just like....yeah, OF COURSE the betrayal in Way of Kings went down like it did. That was CLASSIC, that was something they’d probably talked about doing to other people back when they were all friends. That’s exactly the sort of scheme that Sadeas would probably have encouraged Gavilar to pull on any of the highprinces who were refusing to fall in line. And it’s just so...frustrating that Dalinar never, ever thought that those machinations could have fallen on him and his. It’s right there, right there, all along--Sadeas is the crafty one. And Dalinar trusted him anyway, and I’m. Upset.

I’m really glad that we don’t have to worry about him in the present day, but also like. We haven’t heard from Ialai at all this book. Wth is she planning.

Dalinar “Just Wandering Through a Highstorm Looking for My Lost Knife” Kholin really, really needs to chill.

“brought him to life like nothing else but battle” tbh that’s...weirdly romantic. In a creepy punk!Dalinar kind of way.

Listen, the pining for Navani here just makes the ridiculously long delays honor!Dalinar imposed on himself so ridiculous?? like? he loves her SO MUCH AND HE RESISTED SO USELESSLY FOR SO LONG

Just let yourself be happy, my dude. sigh.

THOUGH HE DID AND THEY ARE NOW AND IT’S GREAT AND I’M SO HAPPY

god, Sadeas and Ialai just...sitting on each other. is great.

UGH they loved each other a lot and they were so well-matched, and tbh I’m actually a little sad for her? that he’s dead now? idk how I feel about that.

Also, the number of times that Sadeas has said, “Oh, Dalinar,” in an exasperated and fond tone is just... bi Sadeas confirmed? idk, I don’t really want him in the bi camp. but I’m getting the feeling he belongs here.

EW DALINAR, PLEASE.

DON’T USE THE KNIFE YOU JUST STABBED SOMEONE WITH TO EAT YOUR DINNER. I DON’T CARE THAT YOU WASHED IT OFF IN YOUR WINE EEWW

“He wasn’t going to drink the wine he’d washed the blood into. He wasn’t a barbarian.” Maybe not, but he’s certainly the most Extra son of a gun I’ve ever encountered in a novel. This is wild.

Also, I’m concerned, tbh, about how his relationship with Evi is going to go down. She’s a soft, left-handed baby. Let her live.

OOOHH THE PARSHMEN ARE STARTING TO HEAR THE RHYTHMS!!! they’re real Listeners now!

Kaladin “I’m Mad that I Care About People AGAIN” Stormblessed

what a good human being

I love that every time he comes across of group of people larger than one he’s like “ah! I must teach them how to shelter and fight and protect themselves! but I don’t care about them! Of course I don’t care!! I just want them to be safe and happy and free! it’s not like I CARE about them!”

this boy is the best boy and I will fite you if you say otherwise

Adolin having “messy in just the right way” hair is DELIGHTFUL and I love that Shallan thinks it’s “cute”.

I’m genuinely disappointed to find out that women on Roshar still have periods.

That’s bullshit.

Petition for anyone with Regrowth to go around healing every woman of her cramps on a regular basis, ‘cause that’s TERRIBLE.

#otp: no mating

“When my father explained that good relationships required investment, I don’t think this is what he meant.” Who knew Adolin was good at puns!!?

Adolin cares so much about his soldiers and about soldiers in general, HE’S SO GOOD WHAT A GOOD AAHH

“You sound like your father.” “Nothing wrong with that.” A GOOD, BEAUTIFUL BOY WHO I LOVE VERY MUCH.

OHHH SHIT

WELP

THAT’S. UNEXPECTED BUT ALSO NOT???

Ialai with the Ghostbloods. That. makes a certain amount of sense in that they are both manipulators to the extreme and also EVIL. OMG THIS IS WILD

god, I adore that Rosharans call all birds chickens, it’s. so. good.

but also Mraize with a parrot: why this.

I’m sooooo worried about Adolin investigating...himself. sort of. I just. so worried.

Adolin going OFF ON Ialai HECK YE BOY GET IT

any time he talks about his mom I get emotional, though. how hard must it have been to lose her, and then to...never talk about her? because Dalinar couldn’t remember and didn’t talk about it? THE BOYS ARE SO STRONG AND I LOVE THEM

but also, like. get rekt, Ialai.

I’m. concerned. About the Ghostbloods. my dude, if you really, honestly think you can control the Voidbringers once they fully level up to Voidbringers, you’ve got another thing coming. Isn’t that the whole point of this!? They were bound to parshman form because they COULDN’T be controlled otherwise? What makes him think he and his organization are stronger and more powerful/capable than the Heralds?

Overconfident evil people are. frustrating.

I mean. I shouldn’t be surprised that Ialai is working with Amaram. and I’m. not really. surprised. but I did just hiss at the book when his name appeared.

God, I hate Amaram. Soooo much.

WHY is he here. Why isn’t he dead yet. Why haven’t we killed him yet. ARGH

mmmmmm why did three separate caravans go missing, and please tell me Kaladin isn’t going to get distracted by an investigation into that.....

(I mean, of course he is, but)

strange intelligent golden glow spren is VERY DISCONCERTING. #yikes.

This book is so dense and so intense and SO GOOD. I remember hitting this point of Words of Radiance and being like “eh, not as good as WoK” but like this one!!!! Just keeps! going!! in all these amazing ways!!! this book is so just...WOW.

[makkeuga]

markhyuck prince/servant au

mark as a prince and hyuck as his servant and..... this is like headcanons i guess 

this is way too long jesus christ good luck 2 reading </33

- ok so mark would be the most admirable prince ever because he is so hard working and modest and kind and all the girls swoon over him tbh

- hyuck is his like... personal servant kinda?? who always wakes him up and makes him his bed and all so he isn't like too low in the hierarchy  

- mark's family didnt want a maid to do that stuff for him bc they dont want their perfect son to feel lust over any girl

- but as we all know, mark isnt really even interested in girls but we will get to that later

- okay so hyuck and mark are very close since hyuck was born to the castle too since his mom was a servant like him and they grew up together

- they are lowkey highkey best friends but !! they have to keep it low because its not suitable for a good boy like mark to hang out with people like donghyuck.

- mark always tells donghyuck his worries and opens up to him before going to bed and he would sit on the edge of his huge bed in his nightgown talking to him and donghyuck would pretend to do some last minute chores so he doesnt have to go just yet

- but of course he always has to go because mark is a prince and donghyuck is just a servant

- all the other boys bore mark so much. he has to attend these fancy ass dinners and all because well, duties, and the other children are just as dull as middle aged men or either too rebellious and talking down to others. mark isnt good at making friends in general even though his parents always tell him to so he tries

- and yet he is always thinking about donghyuck and comparing him to the other boys. donghyuck is always better, always more funnier and more understanding

- so when he gets back to his room donghyuck is waiting for him and mark is on the verge of tears (of frustration) and he almost tears off the fancy clothing he is wearing because its tough to be the perfect prince

- donghyuck would just sigh and take marks hand and rub his thumb over his knuckles and shake his head

- "they are all so horrible, i wish i could take you to those dinners instead"

- "i wouldn't be suitable for that anyway, you have to find a girl to marry who you will take as your companion"

- mark would just go all quiet and shrug his shoulders because mark wants no girl. he is quite convinced donghyuck is all he needs (and his parents, he loves them, really)

- he would also miss the sad look in donghyuck's eyes

- because all the girls swoon over mark but donghyuck is the one who really knows him and who really loves and admires him. not the perfect image but the real mark who gets his palms dirty when he falls off a horse and who whines like a child when he has to get up in the morning

- ok but in the mornings after hyuck has gotten up and ready, he goes to wake mark up. he sneaks carefully into his room and shuts the door and then is when he marches determinedly to the windows and opens the curtains to let the morning rays of sun in

- "good morning sunshine!" he'd yell to mark who would just turn on his side under the heavy blanket and well, whine and groan

- "it's time to rise and shine!" hyuck singsongs the same cliches every morning so it doesnt affect mark anymore so he just closes his eyes

- donghyuck walks to his bed and starts pulling the blanket off but mark just grabs (sleepily!!) donghyuck by his arm and tugs him into the bed next to him and just wraps his arms around the younger boy

- because sleepy mark is also very cuddly mark. its the same thing every morning and it makes donghyuck lose his marbles bc... no.... u cant do that.. ily my bro... thats whats he is thinking

- mark keeps his eyes shut but when he opens them donghyuck's face is so close and the sunshine coming thru the window is reflecting on his eyes and he just looks super beautiful like that and mark is kind of starstruck

- he gets the butterflies and all but he refuses to think about it so he just smiles and laughs with his voice kinda deep because its the morning. mark doesnt understand why donghyuck looks so flustered

- hyuck hits his head with his palm and sighs very loudly

- "you have to get washed up" and drags him up

- donghyuck has known for a very long time that he doesnt like mark only as a friend. he isnt even exactly sure when it escalated to that point bc mark just has always kind of been there and hyuck has seen him grow and mess up and all

- he is /super/ possessive of mark tbh but he never tells the older boy it. like in the whatever space where the servants and maids and all live he can hear the servant girls giggling about how handsome and perfect mark is and how they are jealous of the princess who gets to marry him and donghyuck goes all >:[

- so hyuck would just say something snappy or mean that mark wouldnt like girls like them bc !! he is so jealous !!! bc donghyuck isnt a girl and he is still just a servant after all and it makes him so mad

- donghyuck has some issues with anger management too like nothing super hardcore but anger makes him wanna break bricks

- so he just walks out and tries to find mark

- and like when he is walking somewhere with mark and he sees the girls hyuck just steps closer to mark and glares at them because the older boy is his

- even though he knows he isnt and it wont last but he wants to pretend!

- mark on the other hand had a long, long (ass) ride with realizing what he felt towards hyuck... like where hyuck realized it in their preteens mark only realized it just now as in like... age of 16

- its like... he never really felt attraction to girls anyways or it was always like "i guess they are pretty but thats it" where about donghyuck he was like "my beautiful intelligent funny understanding warm best friend" but it was always like !! best friend !! boys dont like boys !!

- like. highkey in denial

- but it was also bc he was quite young and all so he thought that he will have crushes on girls when he grows up. but he never does and at first he is kind of confused and scared bc everyone is talking abt he will feel strange things towards girls but he never does

- at some point he just puts the two together like... the feelings you should feel towards girls and what he feels towards donghyuck

- again it scares him bc mark is stuck to the stuff he has been taught to!!!

- but after a while he is like.. hyuck is my best friend and i dont wanna lose him bc of this.... so its okay.... and just accepts it (its tough but!!! he manages)

- he doesnt tell hyuck tho

- they both are highkey oblivious but the way they act is so boyfriend-ish anyways so they rlly wouldnt need a lot of chance

- sometimes when the duties and the life in castle gets too much mark asks hyuck to sneak him out

- when he did it for the first time hyuck was hesitant and kind of angry like "??? dont u realize i could get killed for doing this?????" but tbh hyuck is so whipped and cant say no to mark

- and now it happens more often

- mark loves the rush and excitement and seeing the normal life around the town and hyuck just loves to please mark (thats a lie, its not about pleasing but making him happy)

- mark wears a cloak with a hood and keeps his gaze down and narrows his shoulders to appear smaller. he holds donghyucks hand while they r walking on the cobblestone ground bc... he doesnt even have a reason he just wants to hold his hand

- donghyuck doesnt question it bc he doesnt want mark to stop either

- they always have a blast in the town and mark feels normal and ordinary which he likes

- but this time when they r drinking hot chocolate in a narrow street, sitting on a porch, mark doesnt let go of hyucks hand. he just keeps his fingers linked with his while looking away bc he is kinda embarrassed

- they finish their drinks in silence and mark is lowkey sad bc its getting late and they have to go soon but he isnt just ready to let the moment pass so he leans his head on hyuck's shoulder and goes like

- "i dont want this to end. i wanna be normal. with u" and hyuck feels so so so sad

- but they return to the castle, like always

- ok but its mark who confesses bc... he knows he has the upper hand if things would go wrong (which he doesnt wanna talk about)

- its after a fencing practice and mark is all sweaty and gross and covered in mud and mark is gonna take a bath and obviously hyuck is in the bathroom to help him

- but mark is still kind of high on adrenaline while being very exhausted so its a strange state of mind he is in and thats what leads to him just blurting it out (also that how pretty donghyuck looks with a little bit dirt on his cheekbone and messy hair)

- so mark just blurts it out like vomiting "donghyuckilikeyousomuchlikeishouldlikegirlsbutilikeyou"

- and donghyuck is like....excuse me

- like he heard it but ??!!!???!?!?!? his brain is yelling and screaming and he is like what

- mark is coming down to it too and almost taking it back but hyuck is raises his finger saying that shut up, let me think, so mark just stands there lowkey panicking

- "you like me?"

- "im sor---"

- "you, the prince, mark lee, like me?"

- "i didn't----"

- "shut the fuck up"

- and donghyuck just walks to him and kisses him but its not like boom lips on lips action but very careful and gentle and very very clumsy bc neither of them know what they r doing

- but yay! they both realize they love each other!

- also they know it wont be easy but........ they both agree that its worth a try

- and mark gets more of his morning snuggles

and im ending this here its almost 3am adios this was a ride i maybe will continue this someday who knows

[overwatch-imagines-hub]

Hello darling, how's about a little fic or headcannon for Pharah, 76, and Zarya. Where they come back from a morning workout (because let's face it, they probably all get up at dawn to workout) and find their s/o still in bed, but wearing an article of their clothing.

Gaahh, don’t call me darling, you’ll make me blush! /////// I’m supposed to call you darlin’ dammit! >:0

Anyway, since you requested three people at a time, I’ll do headcanons for now, just because that’s easier and, frankly, I always find writing headcanons more fun because I can do little stupid things in those.

~~~

Pharah

She and Zarya are long-distance work-out buds, I swear

Anyway she probably gets up at like four a.m.

Eats something small, fills a giant-ass water bottle, then she’s on her way

Her work-out consists of a five-mile run before the gym, a hardcore almost-military workout at said gym that would make masculine bodybuilder seem like a fragile little flower, then a seven-mile run before heading home

Once she gets home, she’ll take a shower so she doesn’t reek, then starts breakfast for her and her s/o

After breakfast is a go, she’ll go to check on her s/o and wake them up to come sit

They’re still asleep splayed out haphazardly on the bed

Like one foot’s against the headboard, the other leg is off the opposite side of the bed, their head’s hanging off the bed and resting on the chest at the foot of it instead, the blankets are everywhere but on the bed

At least they got a good night’s sleep, as the position shows

They’ll be stiff as when when they wake up though

They’re also wearing one of Fareeha’s pairs of boxer shorts that she uses as pajamas

They’re so precious and pure and sweet

She’ll just stand and are marvel at the beauty of her s/o, despite how ugly of a sleeper they are

Then she briefly forgets about breakfast until she smells smoke

“OH SHIT!” -loud but light foot taps as she runs back to the kitchen-

S/O wakes up from her shout and flails the rest of the way off the bed

After gaining their senses, they get up and stiffly limp to the kitchen

There’s the bird-wife fanning the slightly charred bacon before the smoke detector goes off

Personally, I like burnt bacon so this’d be a morning dream-come-true

S/O ends up helping her finish breakfast

Her fingers will eventually end up rubbing the skin just under the waistband of her shorts that s/o’s wearing at some point

She’ll set up the table while they fix the bacon, then they’ll both sit down to eat and chat over eggs and pancakes and more or less decent bacon

Afterwards she’ll invite them to join her for yoga or stretching so they can work out their stiff bodies together

Also because it another excuse for getting touchy, which Pharah’s always a fan of

Zarya

Similar workout ethic as Pharah

Like I said, they’re long-distance workout buddies

Plus Zarya loves to show off

So she goes to one of those huge, hardcore public gyms that only seriously fit people go to use

Also you know that she made one of those huge, nasty-looking/tasting energy/protein smoothies before she went out too

And then she spends her morning putting them to shame in the best-humored way

She knows a lot of the people there

Gets into competitions with various bodybuilder one

One of these are probably Reinhardt

She usually wins, then proceeds to give whoever she won against tips

She indirectly becomes a personal trainer for some of those struggling there

When she comes home, the first thing she does is get a drink of water, then check in on her s/o

They’re curled up in her huge bed, wrapped in a fuzzy blanket and wearing one of her tank tops that’s a literal dress on them

She’ll smile and quietly come in to change out of her workout gear

Then she’ll go over to her s/o and run her fingers through their hair or give their arm a little squeeze

Just something noticeable enough to wake their s/o up briefly so she can tell them that she’s home

She’ll kiss their forehead or temple and run her fingers lightly along their body where it’s clothed by her tank top

Might ride the tank top up a bit to massage the skin underneath a bit, just enough to help you relax back into sleep mode

It’s her favorite thing to see them wearing her stuff as sleepwear, tbh

Then she’ll leave them to sleep while she makes herself some breakfast

She’ll come back into the room with a cup of coffee and sit in bed with them until they finally wake up

Just tracing her fingers along their body or running a hand through their hair while listening to the quiet nature noises coming through the window

When they do wake up, she’ll ask what they want for breakfast

She’ll carry them out into the kitchen and have them sit on the counter while she makes what they want

If they really want to help, she’ll have them grab things that are nearby where they’re sitting for her

She’ll sit with you while you eat and talk about her workout and any dreams you had and plans for the day

Then you’ll both spend a couple hours in the shower together

Solder 76

He has a home gym or a private gym, or gets up earlier than everybody so he’s gone before more people show up

He’s just not a fan of working out in front of everyone else

He works out shirtless or in a tank top and either sweats or shorts and he just doesn’t want his scarred body to be looked on by loads of people

Not to mention the questions about working about blind he gets every once in while

He’s not blind, goddammit

He just has cloudy vision

The glasses Mercy had engineered for specifically for him helps a lot

His sight is almost back to normal now, if not a bit blurry still

Sometimes he loses track of time during workouts and his s/o will be up before he gets home

This happens frequently

So they’ll either make him breakfast or coffee or just go to the basement where the gym is to see him

Either way their wearing his shirt and his pajama pants, both of which are way too big on them

He hears them before he sees them and stops his workout to apologize for waking them up if he did so

When he turns around and sees them decked out in his sleep attire, he gets bit flustered though

Either stops talking mid-sentence to marvel at them or looks away and stumbles over the rest of his words

When they say he didn’t wake them up but he did lose track of his workout time, he gets all huffy and glares at the clock before walking over to give his s/o a hug and a kiss

If they’re okay with him touching them while he’s all sweaty, that is

They are; it takes a lot for him to get really sweaty gross

If they hadn’t made him breakfast and/or coffee, he asks them to stay while he does his last couple of sets

He offers to let them sit on his back while he does one-handed push-ups

Or hold down his feet while he does sit-ups (and give him kisses when he reaches his knees)

Or spot him while he does his weights

High-key trying to impress his s/o, even though he really doesn’t need to

At some point, he’ll just randomly comment something about them wearing his clothes

Something like “You look good in those” or “You can have those if you want”

Low-key telling them to keep wearing his clothes

After he finishes his workout, he’ll take them upstairs and he’ll go take a shower

He’ll probably ask them to sit in the bathroom with him to chat while he does so

Then they’ll both make breakfast after he’s done

They make the best coffee

His always tastes like dirty water

When they eat, he’ll have them sit on his lap on the living room couch and they’ll share breakfast together while watching cartoons or some random old movie that’s on

He’ll play with their clothes throughout breakfast

After the food’s and coffee’s all gone, the TV tray will be set aside while y’all cuddle for a while

He’ll continue to play with the clothes they’re wearing

Plus kisses

Ending up pinned down under him on the couch with his mouth on their neck his hands in their pants and up their shirt is a total possibility here

Keep wearing his clothes

[sage-nebula]

Mystic Messenger - Entry 10

After a brief hiatus, here we are once again with my Mystic Messenger playthrough. Of course, by this point I have finished the game (and then some), but since people seemed to be enjoying these liveblogs, I figured I’d go ahead and continue posting them anyway. Entry Nine is here, and as a quick recap---

Previously on Mystic Messenger:

Everyone is aware that the special security system in Rika’s apartment is a bomb, installed there by Seven on V’s and Rika’s orders.

We had a flashback sequence to the day Rika had Seven install the bomb, which included a lot of emotional abuse and manipulation on her part.

Seven is still ignoring me, and was doing a good job of it until MC decided to look at a book he had brought with him, which contained a floppy disc that he did not want MC to see. This led to an argument (at least in my rewrite of that scene), and so far, relations have not improved.

So with that little recap out of the way . . .

If you’ll remember, everyone is trying to get in touch with V at the moment, because V’s actions and motivations have become highly suspicious ever since the hacker broke into the apartment, the bomb was discovered, and Seven revealed that he installed the bomb on V’s and Rika’s orders. V, if you’ll recall, is off gallivanting who-knows-where, last we heard. Seven has left him messages, Jumin has left him messages, and now Jaehee is waiting for V’s phone call on Jumin’s orders, despite the late hour. As much as it sucks for Jaehee to have to wait for V’s phone call like this, I will say that the amount of trust and faith that Jumin places in her is sweet. He’s being sweet in his own way.

Although, at least she isn’t alone.

Poor Jaehee. Also poor sales department intern, because I’m sure that falling for Han Jumin can’t be easy due to the fact that he is ace af and doesn’t seem to develop romantic feelings for others very easily (if at all). 

Anyway, Jumin obviously turned down Jaehee’s offer, because she’s the only one he trusts to take V’s call. It makes sense, honestly, since none of the other C&R employees are members of the RFA, as Jaehee is. Either way, Elizabeth the 3rd was there with him, much to Jaehee’s dismay since Elizabeth was shedding everywhere, and---

Jumin is a fucking furry, pt. 3.

V did finally end up calling at the end of this VNM segment, much to Jaehee’s relief. And after he finished talking with Jaehee and Jumin, V . . .

. . . decided to enter the chat at long last. Also, I found it funny how he added an exclamation mark after “you’re here” like he was super excited to see me. Like, are you, V? We’ve spoken a grand total of one (1) time. Are you really that excited to see me?

Someone else is just as eager to see V (and he seems excited to see Seven as well, but . . .), but . . . not quite in the happy way. I also love how Seven was so “!!” about V being in the chat that he typo’d at first. I like to think that he was over in his corner, doing his work and pretending like he wasn’t paying attention to MC (when he totally was), when he noticed her bolt upright on the couch, staring at her phone with wide-eyes as she quickly typed a response. Seeing as her reaction was strange (why would she react that strongly?), Seven decided to log into the chat to see what was going on . . . and then had a similar near heart attack when he saw that V was in the chat. That’s what I like to think happened, anyway.

This cracked me up, honestly. All of this shit is going down, Saeran keeps hacking the RFA chat and broke into the apartment, there is a bomb in the apartment, etc etc, and V just:

V: [walks in 15mins late with Starbucks] “Sorry, I was in the mountains taking photographs. What’d I miss?”

Iconic.

V said that he heard from Jumin that the special security system was hacked, and that he was glad that Seven was able to make it to the apartment on time. Seven was surprised that V heard about this from Jumin, and then got angry that V called Jumin first, demanding to know why V didn’t call him. V explained that---okay, I don’t remember if I mentioned this before, so apologies if I didn’t, but in a conversation that took place before V left on his mysterious trip, Seven talked about how he gave V a new phone that had a bug detector in it. Supposedly, if the call was being tapped, a red light would come on the phone. When Seven demanded to know why V didn’t call him, V explained that the red light kept coming on every single time he tried to call Seven, hence why he chose to contact him via the messenger instead. Seven was mollified . . . though only just.

Anyway, the conversation shifted then. V made it clear that he knew that Seven was staying in the apartment, and warned Seven not to open the drawer to the desk. At that point, Seven got High Key Offended™, demanding to know why V would bring that up out of the blue, if V didn’t trust him. V said that no, that wasn’t the case---the issue was not that he didn’t trust Seven, but rather that he just felt like it should be said. Apparently, according to V, the drawer holds love letters that he had once written to Rika. Hmmm.

Seven’s not having any of that bullshit, either.

I mean, I’m literally fine. I’m not in any more danger than you are, Seven. We’re in the same boat, here. The sooner you realize that, the easier this will be for all of us.

Mmmhm. Mmhm. See, V, that sounds a lot like the backtracking of someone who realizes he fucked up and is now trying to sloppily cover it up. Unfortunately, it won’t work . . .

. . . for me. MC is another story.

This was a part where I got hella frustrated, because I was following the guide to make sure I’d get the Good End, and honestly, it’s a good thing I did, because if I chose the answer choices that I wanted to during this segment, I would have ruined my file hardcore. I wanted to accuse V of being suspicious, and to point out the fact that his backtracking was sloppy. However, that would have led to a Bad End according to the guide I was following. Instead, I had to scold Seven and tell him to listen to V, which I just . . . why? Why is siding with V the correct answer here? WHY DOES THIS GAME MAKE NO SENSE SOMETIMES?!

Anyway, so I had to act like an idiot and side with V throughout this conversation. It’s fine. Whatever.

That aside, Seven was not about to give up. V kept trying to say that Seven was misunderstanding the situation and that he would explain when he returned, but Seven . . . Seven was not about to have that. If you’ll remember, the hacker turned out to be Saeran, who is Seven’s twin brother. Seven was stricken to see Saeran like that, insisting that Rika had said that he was fine, but Saeran views Seven as a traitor. And that . . . that led to this:

(I had to pick that dumbass option for the Good Ending, don’t judge me.)

As you can see, Seven just about has a total meltdown as he demands answers from V about Saeran, and V fakes having bad service so that he can duck out of the conversation. (I mean, he might genuinely have bad service, but let’s be real. He was totally faking it to get out of the confrontation.) I think the most powerful part of this to me was the bit where Seven said, “The filthy hacking jobs that I do, why is that boy, Why is that boy, why is he doing it,” because the repetition really makes it seem as if Seven is nearing hysterics. You can practically hear his hands shaking. People repeat themselves like that when they’re getting hysterical IRL, and while that’s harder to replicate in a chat room, the fact that Cheritz had Seven do it here really emphasized the fact that he is not calm about this, he is losing his shit, this is a very serious situation to him, and V is dodging his questions and making everything worse. 

There was another VNM after that chat in which it’s revealed that, in addition to the robot puppy, Seven also made a robot cat, just as Jumin had suggested before. (Of course this is the one he brought with him. When will the cat bias end? I mean, it’s sweet, but . . .) Whereas the robot puppy was meant for security and breathed fire in order to ward off foes, the robot cat seems to have been made for companionship, and . . .

. . . senses depression.

Of course, Seven is not in the mood to be cheered up by Meowy (which, as it turns out, is the robot cat’s name), so he tells it to shut up and go sit in a corner repeatedly. Meowy refuses to give up, though, until I tell it to be quiet, at which point:

It shut down because Seven programmed it to “absolutely obey” my voice. I’m guessing he must have recorded at least one of our phone conversations to make that happen. It’s kind of sweet. I’m touched.

Anyway, once Meowy quieted itself and goes to sit in the corner as requested, Seven said that he knew it was weird to say this after he told me to ignore him, but that I should absolutely not trust V under any circumstances. Like a decent person I asked if there was anything I could do to help, and he just

Tbh, Seven, I’m never going to stop worrying about you, and it’s clearly not “nothing”, so you really should just cut the nonsense, js.

Seven went on to say that he didn’t even know why he was blabbering, and that he feels “like [he] should shut down instead of that robot.” Seven, you’re a human, not a machine; don’t talk about yourself that way. He told me not to worry about the drawer, and because I was forced to in order to get the Good Ending, I had to say that I really think there might be love letters in there, even though the contents of that drawer are very clearly not love letters, but rather are materials that no doubt prove that Rika has been the Big Bad this entire time, just as I’ve known she is. Saying that the drawer was suspicious, though, leads to a Bad End, so . . . I was forced to act like an idiot. I was forced to be a dumbass. I hate this. I hate it so much.

I especially hate it because Seven responded by calling me “innocent and naive.” Specifically:

SEVEN: “Scrawlers, you’re very innocent and naive. In this situation, I only think that you’ll be very easy for others to manipulate and exploit.”

mfw:

I may be a lot of things, but “innocent and naive” and “easily manipulated and exploited” are not labels that apply. I mean, I know it seems that way because I was forced to pick the dumbass ditz answer choice for MC to get the Good Ending, but . . . asdghdsaghdsgdsdas. I can’t help but feel that the reason why you have to pick the dumbass answer is because Generic Shoujo Heroines are supposed to be naive and innocent, because that is moe~ and cute~, but god damn, do I hate it with a passion.

And unfortunately, things didn’t get better from there. Seven went on to say that MC should forget about the RFA and everything associated with it, including The Party™.

At that point, I was given two choices:

On the plus side, that terrible first choice led to a Bad End, so I didn’t have to pick it. But in all honesty, the second choice isn’t that much better. Seven did not order MC to leave the RFA; he asked her to. He asked her to please leave as soon as the situation was stabilized, and yes, look---he used the word please. He even emphasizes that this is a choice in the next set of dialogue, albeit in a mildly insulting way at the start:

I say “mildly insulting” because while “I know much more than you” is insulting, at the same time it’s kind of true in this situation. Seven does know more about Rika and V than MC does at this point. He has known them since he was a child, and has been used and manipulated by them for just as long (though he’s only just now starting to realize that). He has also been involved with the RFA since its creation. MC, by comparison, has only been involved for a couple of days. She doesn’t have nearly the same scope of information that he does. So he’s right---he does know more than she does---but he’s still being a bit insulting with how he says that, particularly since he’s not actually giving her the chance to learn what he knows, and thus make a more informed decision on her own.

But the rest of what he says isn’t out of line. Though he is a bit insulting at first, he goes on to say that of course he can’t make decisions for her, that it’s her choice whether she wants to stay or not. However, if she chooses to stay because she wants a relationship with him, that’s off the table. That is in his power to decide, and he has decided “no.” He is giving her a hard no. He still feels that what he does is too dangerous for MC to be involved in. And you know what? That is his choice to make. He’s not doing anything wrong here. He’s giving her advice on what he thinks she should do, he’s acknowledging that he can’t make her choices for her, but he’s also saying that he does not want a relationship with her, will not consent to one, that they’ll talk through the messenger from now on and that he wants to return to his work undisturbed. Yeah, it hurts to be rejected yet again, but he’s within his rights to say no. He has every right to say no. No one is obligated to give themselves to someone else. No one is entitled to another person’s time or company.

Unfortunately . . .

LITERALLY WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH THESE ANSWER CHOICES?!

Good god, they’re BOTH horrible!! The second is the most obviously awful, for the most obvious reasons---seriously, what the fuck? What the actual---cheating is never acceptable, never. Granted, it wouldn’t really be cheating in this case given that Seven has said that we are not in a relationship, therefore it isn’t possible to cheat on him---but still. But still. Cheating is never, ever okay. If you want to be with someone else while you’re in a relationship, then break up with the person you’re with. End the relationship, but don’t ever cheat. The fact that “can I cheat on you” was even an answer choice is downright revolting.

But that said, the other answer choice isn’t much better. It’s whiny, entitled, and selfish. “What do I do about my feelings for you” --- bitch, that’s your own goddamn problem, not his! It’s not Seven’s fault if you have feelings for him, any more than it would be your fault if he had feelings for you that you didn’t reciprocate! And yes, Seven does reciprocate the feelings---but it doesn’t matter. It doesn’t matter because to him, the cons outweigh the pros when it comes to pursuing a relationship at this point in time. Trying to guilt trip him into changing his mind, accusing him of being “too one-sided” as if he’s obligated to be in a relationship just because you want it, is downright wrong. If someone says “I don’t want to be in a relationship with you”, they are not being “too one-sided.” They are doing what is best for their own comfort and feelings. It doesn’t matter how much the other person wants to be with them; both people have to equally consent to be in a relationship. Only one person needs to decide to end (or not begin) it. Acting as if Seven doesn’t have that right, or as if he’s in the wrong for saying “no” just because he’s a boy / the love interest, is fucking disgusting. I was so disgusted at this that I almost threw my phone.

Unfortunately, MC has to be a selfish bint here either way, and the “what about my feelings for you” is the one that leads to the Good End (I mean, I would hope to god that “can I cheat on you” doesn’t lead anywhere good, but this is honestly a “lesser of two evils” situation), and as such, MC got the chewing out that she tbh rightly deserved:

mfw:

I’ve seen a lot of people come down on Seven for this, saying how much it hurts to have him say “I don’t care about your feelings”, among other things. And yeah, that’s harsh. However, I maintain that Seven was not in the wrong here. He was perfectly polite with MC up to this point. He told her how he felt, he reiterated for the umpteenth time that he does not want a relationship, said he was going back to work and that he didn’t want to be bothered. And what did MC do? She bothered him. Specifically, she tried to guilt him into being in a relationship with her, at which point he snapped. And that’s a justified snap. If you can see that someone doesn’t want to talk to you, and you continue to push them---and, moreover, you push them with a guilt trip, then you deserve it when they snap at you. MC brought this on herself. She was the one who tried to guilt him into being in a relationship with her. This is on her and I am on his side.

(I understand I’m not having the intended reaction here. I don’t care.)

I’ve also seen people call Seven “tsundere” for this, but I disagree with that as well. He’s not being tsuntsun, he’s being genuinely upset that MC won’t respect his boundaries and listen to him when he tells her that he doesn’t want a relationship with her. That’s not tsun, that’s normal and justified.

Of course, it doesn’t end there:

mfw:

Again, I was forced to pick that for the Good End. I don’t remember what the other answer choice was, but I can only assume it wasn’t much better.

I mean, the first half is fine. Seven is very obviously worried and freaking out at the mere idea of something happening to MC, and calling him on it isn’t wrong. But “so don’t avoid me, please?” is just so goddamn whiny, and it isn’t being considerate of his feelings at all. He’s high-key stressed, he’s worried about MC and about his twin brother who is very clearly in a bad place, he’s not sleeping, he’s barely eating . . . Seven is going through a lot right now, and all MC can do is whine about how she feels lonely and sad that he’s not being nice to her. =( What a fucking joke, honestly. It’s disgusting. I’m disgusted by this behavior. I would never treat him like that, not ever. I may not be the best person in the world, but at least I’m considerate enough to see things from the perspective of someone I care about when they’re going through a hard time instead of making it all about Me, Me, Me.

Seven, understandably, doesn’t agree to stop avoiding her.

You deserve everything in the entire world, actually. You especially deserve to be with someone who isn’t an oblivious, selfish bint, but what can we do.

Of course, MC just continues to be Sad™ because he’s insisting that they’ll never see each other again after this, and while it’s totally fair for her to feel put out by that, I find it hard to sympathize given how horribly she’s handled this entire situation. And as you could expect, the conversation doesn’t end on a happy note . . .

. . . but instead ends with Seven leaving the apartment altogether because he can’t take being around MC like this anymore. (Presumably because MC is being sad and he’s feeling guilty about it, particularly because he does have feelings, he’s just repressing them because he feels like he has to.) 

Re-writing this scene so that it’s a bit more in-line with how I imagine MC (and contains less of the “wahhh pay attention to meeee” nonsense) was a bit difficult, but I did manage it, so . . . (reminder: My MC is MC 4, so---short hair, gold eyes, et cetera.)

MC let the hand holding her phone fall to her lap. The empty chat room (empty except for her, anyway) stared up at her, and despite how quiet and still it was, it felt like it echoed. V had---he had fled. Ran away. Avoided all accusations, but in so doing basically admitted to his own guilt. She couldn’t say she was surprised, really, except---except she was. It made sense---if Rika was suspicious, if she had been up to shady things, then it made sense that her boyfriend, V, had been, too. But the one time MC had spoken to V, back when she was first pulled into this whole mess, he had seemed so nice. Appearances could be deceiving, she guessed, especially in an online chat room, but she had just gotten this feeling---

“God Seven! God Seven! I sense you are depressed, meow.”

MC blinked, and pushed herself up on her knees so that she could see over the back of the couch. Seven was still in his corner, his elbows on his knees and his face in hands, his cell phone on the floor beside him. Standing next to the phone on four shiny, white paws was a little cat, whose tail waved slowly back and forth with a faint whirr noise on each wag.

It was a cat, she realized. A little robot cat.

“I automatically turn on when I sense that you are depressed, meow,” the cat went on. Its voice was high despite the obvious computerized tone, and far more emotive than MC would have expected from a robot. Then again, MC supposed she didn’t know very much about them. “The source of God Seven’s depression is bad service, meow. I analyzed, meow.”

Well, MC thought wryly, that’s close enough.

“Shut up,” Seven said. His voice was muffled by the hands he still had over his face. His glasses were pushed up to his hairline so that he could smash his palms into his eyes.

The robot cat was not deterred. “Cheer up, meow! I, Meowy, do not lose service, meow!”

“Be quiet,” Seven said, and he lifted his face at last to turn to the robot cat---Meowy---who gave a whirring purr in response. Seven picked it up with one hand and looked on its underside, scowling as Meowy waved its paws in response to being lifted up from the floor. “How do I turn this off? Damn . . .”

“Need explaining, meow?” Meowy asked.

“I said shut up!” Seven snapped, and dropped Meowy unceremoniously back on the floor.

True to the species it was designed on, Meowy landed on its feet, undeterred by the rough treatment. “Meowy wants to hear master, meow!”

Seven groaned and put his face in his hands again, and MC stood up from the couch. She had a feeling that Seven still wouldn’t want to talk to her (especially now, given what had happened with V), but it wasn’t as if she could be any more aggravating than Meowy was apparently being at the moment. She locked her phone and slipped it into her pocket as she looped around the couch, and when she was near enough, said, “That robot . . . you made it, then.”

Seven took a deep breath---slow inhale, slow exhale. He then dropped his hands back into his lap, his glasses slightly askew on the bridge of his nose, and said quietly, “Don’t worry about it.” He opened his eyes to glare at Meowy, who was still staring at him expectantly. “Hey, robot cat. Go away. I don’t want to talk to you, so just go to a corner.”

Meowy didn’t budge. “I can’t leave once I sense depression, meow! Cheer up, meow!”

Seven gritted his teeth, his hands balling into fists on his lap, and MC---sensing danger---bent down and scooped Meowy up off the floor.

“Meowy,” she said, “let’s stay quiet for now, okay?”

Meowy chirruped, not unlike a cat that had spotted a bird, and then purred again. “That’s a voice I have to absolutely obey due to my programming, meow. Shutting down, meow.”

MC stared at the robot in her arms as the purring whirred down into silence, and its blue eyes went dark. Once it was deactivated, MC looked back at Seven, feeling more than a little bewildered.

“You programmed it to obey my voice?”

It could have been her imagination, or maybe the lighting, or maybe both, but it looked like Seven’s cheeks tinted red. “Whatever. It doesn’t matter,” he muttered. He took another deep breath and released it, closing his eyes once more as he leaned his head back against the wall. “At least it’s finally quiet.”

It did matter, MC thought, whether Seven programmed a robot to respond to her voice (and how had he done that, anyway? Had he recorded some of their phone conversations?), but she supposed it wasn’t the most important thing to discuss right then. She sat Meowy on the floor behind the couch before she walked back over to Seven, and sat on the floor near enough so they could talk, but not so close that she’d be invading his space.

“Hey, so . . . that whole thing with V was kind of a mess,” she said. “Things didn’t go well at all. Want to talk about it?”

Seven huffed a humorless laugh, and without looking at her said, “Not really. But . . .”

MC raised her eyebrows. “But?”

Seven looked over at her at last, chewing the inside of his cheek a moment before he said, “I know it’s funny to say all this after I told you to stop paying attention to me, but whatever happens . . . don’t trust what V says.”

“Yeah, I kinda got the feeling that he was dodging stuff back there,” MC said. Seven nodded, and looked back at his laptop monitors. “God only knows why, but . . . anyway, it’s not like I talk to him a whole lot, anyway. I’ve only talked to him, what, once or twice before? So unless something big happens with RFA, it’s not like we’ll be chatting much anyway, probably.”

Seven snorted, and tugged on his headphone wire. “God,” he said. “RFA.” He was quiet a second before he said, “I think you shouldn’t be more involved with RFA.”

That came out of nowhere. “What? Why?”

“What do you mean, why?” Seven asked. He gestured vaguely with his hand. “Look at all of this. Look at the mess you’re in. You look at this, and then you still have to ask that?”

“This is because of Rika---and V, I guess,” MC said. “Jaehee, Jumin---the others have nothing to do with it. And neither do you, really.”

Seven gave her a dumbfounded look. “Have you forgotten who installed the bomb in the first place?”

“No. I also haven’t forgotten who saved me from its detonation,” MC shot back.

Seven shook his head and rolled his eyes, and looked straight ahead again. MC followed his gaze to a desk on the other side of the room.

“V told me not to open the drawer because there’s something in there,” he said. “An alarm will ring if someone like you opens the drawers or one of the cabinets.”

“Yeah, I remember.”

“But I can control all the alarms, so if I want to, I can see everything. I’m sure he logged in because he heard that I’m here and got nervous about something.”

“Makes sense,” MC said. “So why don’t we open the drawers and take a look?”

Seven didn’t look at her. He kept his eyes trained on the desk, chewing the inside of his cheek. At length, he said, “I will someday . . . but not right now.”

“Why not?”

“I’m sure there’s something that an RFA member should never see . . . and it’s hard enough for me to keep sane right now given how my trust in V is shattered. I need time.”

“Understandable,” MC said. They were both quiet again, Seven still staring at the desk across the room, and after a moment MC asked quietly, “But, hey . . . are you sure there’s nothing I can do to help? Even if it’s just getting you a drink or something. You look like you could use one.”

Even before she finished speaking, Seven was shaking his head, and he closed his eyes. “It’s nothing,” he said, and that was one of the biggest lies MC thought she had ever heard. “God, I made you worry again . . .”

“Seven, I’ve been consistently worried about you for days now,” MC said. “This doesn’t change that.”

Seven gave her a sharp look. “You shouldn’t be. I’m not worth worrying about.”

“Agree to disagree,” MC said.

Seven gave her a frustrated look for only a moment before he tore his eyes away. Once more, he scrubbed his hands up his face. “God. I feel like I should shut down instead of that cat.”

“Sleep would be good,” MC said. “You really look like you could use it. Want to take the bed?”

“No. It’s late. You’ll need to go to sleep soon. You should probably already be in bed, actually.”

“Look who’s talking,” MC said, and Seven rolled his eyes. “I can sleep on the couch, I don’t mind. Or the bed’s big enough for both of us, if you won’t freak out about sharing.”

“I can sleep on the floor,” Seven said. “Right over there by Meowy.”

“If you want to sleep by Meowy so bad, I’ll put him in the bed,” MC said. “Then you two can snuggle and have a great slumber party.”

“Why are you being so difficult?” Seven snapped.

“Why are you?” MC snapped back.

They glared at each other for a few seconds, and only after Seven seemed to realize she wouldn’t back down did he look away, loosing another sigh before he opted to change the subject instead of continuing their argument.

“Whatever. Look, just . . . don’t worry about the drawer. I’ll take care of it.”

“I never had any doubt about that,” MC said. “It’s not the drawer I’m worried about. It’s you.”

Seven shot her a frustrated look. “Don’t worry about me. I already said---”

“I know what you said,” MC interrupted, “and I don’t care. You can control a lot of things, Seven, but how I feel is not one of them. I’m going to care and worry about you whether you like it or not.”

“So you care about me, yet somehow you don’t care when I’m telling you to stop?”

“I don’t care to buy into the lie that everything’s fine and you’re okay when you’re obviously not,” MC said, and Seven tossed up one hand before he let it fall back to his side. “You need help, Seven. I don’t know what kind of help you need, but you need something. I’m beginning to think everyone in RFA does, actually. This is one of the most drama-filled charity organizations I’ve ever seen in my entire life. Not that I’ve been involved with a lot of charity organizations before, but---”

“Why don’t you just forget the RFA?” Seven said. “Forget everything related to RFA. The members, the party---forget it all.”

“Uh, that’s going to be kind of hard considering I’ve been the one coordinating all these e-mails and party invites,” MC said. “Not to mention the fact that I’m pretty sure Yoosung might have a meltdown if I say the show’s over that suddenly, but---why?”

“You’ll only be in danger by staying in some place like this,” Seven said, and this time MC rolled her eyes. The danger again. Of course. “So as soon as the hacker issue is solved, please leave.”

“Believe it or not,” MC said dryly, “this apartment is probably safer than where I was staying before, bomb and all. It’s definitely a lot nicer. It has running water and everything.”

Seven furrowed his brow. “Where were you staying before?”

Fuck was what she wanted to say, because it was honest even if it wouldn’t answer his question. She cared about him---thought she loved him, probably, as much as she had ever loved anyone, anyway. But despite that, or maybe because of it, she still wasn’t ready to divulge her past with him. She still wasn’t ready to tell him where she had been before, or what she had been doing . . . why she had decided to take up residence in Rika’s apartment even though party planning wasn’t one of her life callings.

So instead of answering his question, she said, “Why don’t you tell me, Mr Genius Hacker?” She snorted. “I knew you didn’t really do a background check.”

Seven glared at her. “Don’t be so sure,” he said, and in truth she wasn’t, but she also knew that any background checks he did wouldn’t have turned up much of anything. “I just didn’t want to invade your privacy. I told you, I was only looking into you before to make sure you were safe, on V’s orders.”

“Well, no worries about that. I’m perfectly safe. Totally legit. On the up-and-up.” MC touched two fingers to her heart, and then held them up. “Scout’s honor.”

Seven eyed her for a second before he said, “You’re not a scout.”

“Guilty as charged,” she said, and grinned. His lips twitched, but he didn’t smile. “But seriously, this is a definite upgrade from where I was before, even if it’s not permanent. I’m safe enough right where I am, especially since you’re here. There’s nothing to worry about.”

Seven sucked in a breath, and looked down at his laptop again. He was quiet for a long moment, and just when MC thought that he was going to go back to ignoring her (which would be fine, in a sense, especially since this was the longest and most pleasant conversation they had had in the apartment yet), he said, “You’re free to do whatever you want. But my thoughts will not change.”

MC felt her heart pick up speed in her chest, but in the unpleasant way that came right before an unwarranted visit from the police or realizing that someone had just picked her pocket. “Meaning?”

“Meaning that even if you try to get involved with me, I’ll refuse,” he said. “This isn’t something a person like you should be involved in.”

Hearing that he didn’t want to be with her---again---hurt, even if it wasn’t surprising. Rejections worked that way, she guessed. No matter how many times you were rejected, it never took the sting off. But with the sting came a flash of annoyance, particularly since she felt she hadn’t done a single damn thing to warrant the rejection this time.

“If you don’t want to be with me, fine, I get it,” she snapped. “I never even said that I was doing this to be with you, so thanks for assuming. But if you could do me a favor and stop acting like I’m weak and helpless, that’d be great.”

Seven locked his jaw, and didn’t look at her. “I never said you were weak and helpless.”

“That’s how you’re acting,” she said. “‘This isn’t something for a person like you to be involved in’ --- a person like me? What the hell does that mean?”

“It means that you’re pure, and innocent, and naïve, and you don’t understa---”

“I don’t understand? You’re the one making a hell of a lot of assumptions about me with no basis to go on!” MC snapped, and once again they were glaring at each other. MC didn’t care. “Where the hell did you get the idea that I’m pure, innocent, or naïve?”

“You don’t know anything about this situation,” Seven said. “You don’t know the truth about V, or me, or---or any of it. That’s naivete---ignorance.”

“It’s ignorance that isn’t my fault. How am I supposed to know anything if I haven’t been told? And I know,” she said, holding up one hand as he opened his mouth to fire back, “that it’s none of my business, but I don’t think it’s fair for you to hold it against me, either.”

“I’m not holding anything against you,” Seven bit out. “I’m trying to protect---”

“Maybe I don’t need as much protection as you think I do,” MC said. “Maybe I can take care of myself. Maybe I’m not some braindead, helpless child that can’t understand things or handle tough situations. I don’t know a lot about you, Seven. You’re right. But you don’t know a lot about me, either, so maybe stop acting like you do.”

Heavy silence hung between them. She regretted what she said almost as soon as she said it; no doubt he was pissed, or hurt, or maybe rethinking whatever it was he felt about her, and not in a good way. But before she could try to smooth over what she had spat in anger, Seven looked back at his laptop.

“Let’s just stop talking about this,” he said. “From now on, if I have to tell you anything concerning your safety, I’ll do it through the messenger, so . . . that’s that.”

MC was filled with a heavy, hollow sort of defeat, and her shoulders sagged. “Yeah,” she said. “That’s that.”

“I’m going to get back to work,” he said. His voice was still even, but it somehow sounded just as empty as MC felt. “So don’t bother me.”

“Fine.”

Once again silence fell over them, though this time it was broken a few seconds later by the sound of Seven clicking his mouse, and then putting his fingers to the keys. He was a fast typist; he didn’t so much as glance at the keyboard, yet he typed so quickly it was as if his fingers were gliding over the keyboard instead of actually pressing the keys down. The sound of the keys clacking was like raindrops on a windowpane. It felt too awkward to go back to the couch, now, and the weight of what she had said before was still rooted in her gut. This conversation, like so many before it, had ended on a bad note. And that had been the norm for the past couple of days, and she knew that, but she still couldn’t let it go.

So after another couple seconds of silence punctuated only by swift typing, MC said, “Just so you know, this---this doesn’t change anything. It doesn’t change how I feel. I still care about you, a lot. Regardless of anything that’s happened, or anything that could happen . . . you still mean a lot, and are still very important to me. I just want you to know that.”

Seven had stopped typing the second she had spoken up, and when she finished, he slammed his hands down at the base of his laptop. Despite herself, MC jumped.

“I told you not to bother me!” Seven snapped, and he looked up to glare fiercely at her. “What part of that didn’t you understand?!”

“I wasn’t---!” MC began, but as he raised his eyebrows, she felt her shoulders sag, giving him the point. “Okay, I’m sorry. I should have left you alone. But I just wanted to let you know how I feel, because---”

“I don’t care about your feelings!” Seven snapped. “And I never asked---”

“Well, I care about yours!” MC snapped back, and that brought him up short. He stared at her, eyes wide, and MC curled her fingers into fists. “You think I don’t get that you don’t care about my feelings, Seven? After how you’ve been the past few days, ever since you got here---after you didn’t so much as look happy even for a second once we finally met in person, you think I haven’t gotten the message that you don’t care yet? ‘Cause trust me, I’ve got it. Loud and clear. You care about my safety, yeah. You care about my body, my life, whether I’m breathing or not. But you don’t care about me.”

He looked stricken. “That’s---that’s not---!”

“And that’s fine,” she said, and she raised her voice a little speak over him. She was shaking so bad she could feel her teeth rattling, but that was the adrenaline. She wouldn’t let it stop her. “It’s fine, I---I don’t care if you don’t care about me, that’s fine, it’s whatever, I can live with it. But that’s not going to stop me from caring about you. I care about you. I---like you, a lot, a---a whole hell of a lot. And whether you like me back or whatever doesn’t change anything. It doesn’t change how I feel. So I wanted you to know, not because I want or expect you to do anything about it, but just so you know that there’s someone, however unimportant, who cares about you. There’s a lot of people, actually, I think, given RFA, but---whatever. Point is, I care. And if you need me, I’m here for however long this lasts.”

MC stood up.

“I’m . . . I’m going to go lay down for a bit. Clear my head. That sort of thing,” she said. “But if you need anything, just . . . come get me.”

Seven said nothing. The conversation was over, and MC couldn’t decide whether she was relieved for that or not.

But when she went back to the bedroom, she only just made it inside the door before she heard the sound of shuffling equipment. Quietly, so as not to let him know that she had noticed, MC looked around the doorway to the bedroom in time to see him gathering his laptop and other equipment in his arms. He didn’t so much as glance in her direction, nor was he very careful with the equipment he was moving. Instead, he piled cords and his wireless mouse on top of his laptop keyboard, balanced that on the crook of his arm, and then headed to the front door.

He stepped aside, and let the door shut behind him, without looking back once.

MC sighed heavily, and walked back to the bed, flopping back on it as she had told him she would. She didn’t expect him to go far; whatever she had snapped about him not caring about her (which wasn’t really true, she knew, and she felt bad, but she was hurt and angry and---), she knew he did. Probably he was sitting just outside the door, in the hallway, regretting his choice to go out since the wifi was worse in the hall than it was in the apartment. Then again, maybe he had his laptop rigged to get choice signal wherever he was. It wouldn’t surprise her.

She didn’t know what to do. When this was over---she had figured the party would be pretty basic, and that she’d be let go once it was done. She’d be free to return to that little studio apartment she had been squatting in, provided it wasn’t already taken by some other drifter, or rented out by the landlord. Or maybe RFA would have wanted to keep her as a party coordinator, and maybe she could have found a way to help one of them get her a job and an apartment. Jumin would probably hire her. She didn’t know what she could do, but maybe Elizabeth the 3rd could use a more dedicated pet-sitter. It’d probably make Seven happy, if his girlfriend was cat-sitting Elly. Then again, dating Seven would probably disqualify her.

Not that they were dating. They weren’t. They never would, unless Seven’s mind changed, and she doubted that was going to happen any time soon. She rolled over on her side, glaring at the wall.

It was fine, she didn’t care---well, she did care, but she wasn’t---she didn’t need him to like her back. She had been on her own for long enough before this, and she could continue on this way. But everything felt like it was spinning out of control, and she wanted to help. She wanted to be there for him. And though she had always been alone before, it was different now. It wasn’t just that she was alone; it was that she was now aware of a space beside her that should have been filled, but wasn’t, and now that she was aware of the empty space, she couldn’t ignore it.

Her phone beeped. She shifted just enough so that she could pull it free from her pocket, and when she unlocked the screen, she saw that Jaehee and Yoosung were in the chat. No doubt Yoosung would have more than a few words to say about what V had done, and none of them nice. For once, MC didn’t think she could be very annoyed by whatever tantrum she was about to walk into.

She sighed, and tapped her screen to open the chat.

[bubblywimp-blog]

22 July-An Idea of What’s going on in my life

Okay! so i’ve decided to write until i get a response from you guys..or until i get bored.

okay so, it’s been a month since school started..me and Iomhara have been coping well..adjusting to the lamos in our class..well..we arent really adjusting, when the school started me and she used to practise maths sums and study….mostly because of the classes we both had..my teacher gives us a hell of a homework and the math’s one makes really hard tests..my parents take tution tests seriously so i need to study..study hard!

Flashback

Ugh! i am early again!..now i have to wait for some time until someone i know shows up..

A guy entered the door..his name is shaan..a weirdo..his gang was once playing truth or dare and i heard my name being called over..i looked in his direction and saw him pointing at me saying “this is Lara..there the one whose doodling.” and his other friend looking at me..hell that was awkward cause i caught them looking and talking about me and since they were playing truth or dare the were probably talking something like-She’s cute,i’ve a crush on her, given a chance i would go out with her..blah blah blah. not saying that i am THE CHICK but i know they were talking about this stuff cause they were embarrassed when the saw me looking, me being the generous human i am just looked their way for a minute or two and then started doddling again.

so after that incident it was awkward with them..

now its fine..i’ll come to them later

the thing now is he is the second person that enters this god damn classroom after me..its irritating because we just sit there in a really awkward silence.

I was feeling a bit nauseous so i decided to open the windows thats when i noticed the the blue team’s(this team has a real name that is a more reasonable one but can’t disclose it) senior football selections were taking place today..and fuck! thats where he was..shining like literally shining..man he was the first one i put my eyes on like aww..he is just so cute well not cute he is hot af!..we’ll name him footballer. there was also this dashing new head boy he is a goody two shoes..tani had a crush on him in 8th grade for only 6 months that is..he is incredibly cute! like the dream boyfriend..the good one the one who is sweeter than the whole honeydukes together(Harry Potter reference!)..and humble,genreous,gentle, he is every good adjective in the dictionary.but not my type.now guess what?..this guy we’ll call him Lost Teddy Bear(LTB for short - cause he sure looks like one-but in a cuter way),so LTB thought i had a crush on him cause i used to lookout for tani and  he well sometimes..okay! i’ll be honest..many times caught me saying ‘he’s there’,’look he’s coming this way’ and all this shit!

and then he started noticing and ignoring our group..i was doing the same.eventually tani got over him,i told you she is never the commitment type..kine of me but more bold i will get bored if :

i find someone new

something bad happens like he tells me to stop,he has a hardcore crush on someone,etc

or he starts looking ugly

i stop seeing him

gradually i loose interest.

btw that Nilay guy did the pineapple cut..if thats what its called..he looks so weird and i dont like it so interest meter a bit low..

now this teddy bear was also trialing..how many things can you even do eh?..like you are the head boy,so automatically you would be good in academics,you play football,you are the guy most girls would want to date..i can tell that..girls are always trying to flirt with him. the next thing that would happen is i would see him dancing and singing in two voices..like literally are you a super being or something??..plus he has read almost each and every famous book series

The Hunger Games,Maze Runner,Harry Potter,Percy Jackson,and what not

i know this much about him cause well 1.he is famous and 2.his best friend is in my class or was in my class he and GQ were really good friends and this guy had a crush on me,hell! he even waited for me..he waited for 3 years proposed 3 times like boy! i dont like you romantically! sorry but i have frien zoned you! and there is no bloddy thing in this bloddy world that can undo the effect! this guiy you know was really good..sweet and totally into me but no! me being the most stupidest human bring on the planet i friend zoned him!..the thing with me is -i dont like people who like me i want people that have no interest in me,most of the time it is like that.I had literally friend zone each and every datable guy in my class..so back to teddy bear and this teddy is in 12th grade now

so they were trialling..alot of people were there..

now back to my pretty footballer!!..my first reaction when i saw him was fuck

i mean how can someone be that hot!!

and why the hell am i writing in italics..better turn it off...its getting creepy..okay so yeah done..

i was drooling over my babe(technically he is not mine,doesnt even know i exist..) when Arya entered she is a fine gal. nice one to have a chat and talk about boys..well she is like did you see? so many guys are trialling!..and most of them are sooooo hooooot!!!

and i am like i cant see them i am lost in his beauty

“which one?” asked Arya

“the one with the red shirt” i said

“the one that blocked the ball right now?”

“yeah that one”

“he looks hot”

“do you know there is this guy in the green house..i saw him during one of those shitty house meetings..and he is just so cute!!!..and guess what! he is national level boxer and a state level football keeper!!..his personality is so awesome!..we’ll call him boxer” said Arya

“uh-huh nice one!..which grade is he in?” i asked

“11th grade i’ll take you to see him during recess” replied Arya

“righto!”

“hey do you wanna see this footballer guy face to face..they may be coming upstairs for changing!” proposed Arya

“of Course!”

so then we were waiting in the corridor which was filled with students..seniors,juniors,9th graders on the left corridor,11th graders etc on the right one..and then he entered..i swear he’s got abs...and he is so tall so cute..so awesome!..of course he did not notice me,of course he did not bother to turn and say sorry when his sweatfull body..if being more specific then- his shoulder brushed against mine..of course still he does not know that his smile makes my day..of  course he does not know that he is the reason me and Iomhara eat our lunch as fast as we can..ofcourse he wont come out when he is finished with his lunch..of course he wont bother..

i told my friends about this tani and aki said that i was being a low standard bitch who would fall for anyone fair and tall...but this is so not true,pratham is fair and fairly tall...i hate him.i hate him because he is a playboy.If Footballer is a playboy then i won’t be that crazy about him.

And well Iomhara was not that excited about him(this was when she had not seen him)..the same was with aura..the thing is if my friends,whenever i tell them about a guy and they don’t know him that is they have no idea of his appearance, they automatically lose interest. Plus Iomhara had a glimpse of him once and he appeared to her as FAT! like literally he has freakin’ hottie abs for heavens sake!..but then she came around and is like he is okay-okay..aura had the same opinion. but no! he is awesome i dunno what happens when i see him but the way he talks the way he smile the way he walks even though my friends say he is a bit lanky,i dont care!!..its been a month since i have been into him..! and now that i think of it,i shouldn’t waste time on people who don’t even know i exist..but then again he could know i exist,if i talk to him..but he does not even come out during lunch breaks..

anyway this aki has a crush just like mine..but this one he is  a bit different..lets call him Yan, so when i first saw him i was like “girl you deserve better”

and then aki is like i dunno i just feel something when i see him.

like literally! he is skinny, is not even that handsome!..he is even taken!!..i dont think so footballer is in a relationship.

Yan’s a 11th grader,his class is next to mine. so once he was passing by and is asked him his name,very innocently he said “Yan.”

i gotta admit that was kinda cute but still! he is a prefect!!!..anyway after a few days when i saw him again i had the urge to go and say hi so i did he even greeted back though it was with hesitation and Iomhara is like what did you just do,and i am like i wanted to say hi. A few days passed with hi’s and bye’s.Iomahara started doing it too but with a ‘bhaiya’ it means brother. she does this because she wants to make it clear that she is in no way interested in him,as for me i like to keep ‘em confused!..so this hesitation began to slip away and after that he was like ‘yeah i know these girls..so better be good and say hi’

Yesterday was the schools first academic council meeting those are the meeting in which you can complain loads about teachers and the school but no one does that cause the blame would come on you and well i was chosen along with a super smart guy of my class..he looks a bit like jerry from tom and jerry. we arrived a bit early and there was a bit of time left(or we can say our principal arrived a bit late-that bastard! always arrives late and i could not take a last round in the corridor to see my babe-not really my babe he is..)

when i arrived i saw that Yan was also there..our periodic test had just gotten over  and we were as  usual roaming the corridor when i saw Yan,Iomhara said hi to him and he returned it back but when i did,i dunno if it was the hustle bustle in the background or something but he did not notice me.. i felt kinda bad tbh..anyway during this council meeting i was hoping that footballer would represent his class but no! rather a guy who had his face shape showed up! no literally! first of all i am with all the people who just want to complain and then i need to put on my collar button see that my hair look neat and sit up straight because i am sitting in front of the principal,the vice principal,the coordinator and all the head teachers and then this footballer does not show up! anyway i told you before that Teddy Bear is the head boy so automatically he was in the meeting jotting down points next to the pretty head girl and he is so cute! a cutie literally that was the only entertainment for me! though i think he noticed me and then was like ‘this stalker girl! how can she be in this council! i dont think so  she is that good in her studies all she does is crack jokes with that girl group of hers’

and i can tell he and Yan both were dead surprised to see me there. well when my class teacher Eela told me that she had given my name for that i was too,cause i dont come sincere and studious on the first glance..atleast i dont think so i do..

anyway after all those stupid little complaints from people, a guy from 12th grade (the same year as teddy bear) came up he is the academic prefect and gave an awesome speech! like seriously dude you rock!..he was giving us tips on how to study for competitive exams.you know this guy he came 7th out of 5000 people! that too in a really tough exam! and he was keep saying that seniors should be more approachable,juniors should try to seek help from them and all i really liked this point-not with the academic meaning(know what i mean,if you don’t i make it simple for you-footballer is my senior!!!,,so i was thinking about him!) anyway the speech was so awesome! ..man so so so flattered i was!..

anyway his speech ended and then we were allowed to disperse,when i was going towards the exit and looking here and there i caught Yan’s eye and guess what? he smiled,i did not even say hi or make the first move! he genuinely smiled!!! god! if i am able to make friends with him maybe i can set things up for aki!!

and right now i am really irritated on teddy bear like seriously dude! just stop noticing me! i know you do! i feel the awkwardness!

after the meeting when we were dispersing,Iomhara and me were going down the stairs and i saw Teddy Bear talking with the head girl,they are always talking to each other..don’t tell anyone but i kinda ship them

and i can swear in front of the ministry of magic that i saw his eyes flick towards me and then back to he girl!..its bloddy awkward you know!

so thats pretty much and also the gorrila guy sid on which aura had a crush on..aura got over him! like i am so happy!!

and after sometime that animal got in a relationship with a  girl named Ifa. this sid guy is always irritated,irritated by anything..he can even be irritated if you breathe! i wont be surprised if he is irritated by his own breathing..its kind of funny to see him like that!..me and Iomhara like to irritate him! especially me !

So guys-actually i was planning to write on how my day went but i was practically writing this whole day,not this post but setting  up the account and all and i am pretty slow at things so yeah!..anyway this is pretty much about whats going on in my life right now..i will tell you about my summer vacations in a different posts,but for the time being lets keep it this much!

LaraAngel

[solienna]

i was going to be like 'all of them' but that would be mean so instead im 'just' going to ask for 1, 4, 8, 10, 13, 17, 21, 28, 32, 33, 35, 47, 50,

putting this under a readmore bc meander!!! you spoil me

01: When did you first start writing?      okay i actually am gonna give you two answers to this question bc i feel like i started writing at two periods in my life. the first time i actually started writing was in third grade because i had like. the BEST third grade teacher, he was awesome and in my eyes was like, the best artist i had ever met just bc he had a basic grasp of how to draw shit and i absolutely didn’t and still don’t, every time teachers tell me to draw things for an assignment i lose ten years off my lifespan but anyways!! off topic. he really encouraged creativity and i was in a class with one of my friends, his name was like john or michael or something, and i would write and he would illustrate (i thought he was the second-best artist i had ever met just bc he also had a basic grasp on drawing and i still didn’t). i wrote about like. this dog and his name was super yuff and got his powers through lightning that struck him and he just flew around and like. idk he did a lot of shit, i still have the stories i wrote. but like i was DEDICATED to this character and so was my illustrator friend. i remember one weekend i was just sitting on my bed with a bunch of folded up printer paper just writing about this dumb superhero dog that somehow ended up in like the halo universe bc even back then i was obsessed with video games. that was the first thing i actually WROTE.         HOWEVER. after third grade i just took a huge break. like not intentionally, of course. i loved writing but i didn’t know it was my THING yet. i didn’t really have a thing yet, it was only third grade ok. HOWEVER. when i transitioned into middle school that’s when i picked up writing again. i don’t even remember why. all i know was that my dad had bought skyrim and he was playing it and just by watching it i LOVED it. i adored the history behind the game and i just loved the graphics, and when i started playing the game i got HOOKED. stayed up entire nights just doing random side quests for npcs and feeling a huge goddamn hero, let me save this talking dog from the wrath of his daedric master nbd, just doing my job, let me set all these beehives on fire and get mauled by a bear, cool cool. and one day i just? was like wow, why don’t i write a story about it! about my skyrim OC going to solstheim and falling in love with the aloof nd really sarcastic and interesting teldryn sero (who still remains one of my favorite skyrim npcs to this day)!! and i thought i was Hot Shit too, i thought i fucking invented fanfiction. and then i found wattpad and then that was that folks, i got hooked on writing all over again and i still am

04: Have you ever thrown a book across the room?      mmmm not that i can recall? i’m not really a book-thrower, i’m more of a book-holder. like if something really shocking happens in a book i feel like i’d be more likely to hug it close to my chest than throw it08: What’s the best piece of feedback you’ve ever gotten?      tbh pretty much everything you’ve told me meander!! i don’t really think i’d be writing that much if not for you. honestly you flatter me on a daily basis with your compliments about my really pretentious use of metaphors in like every single paragraph and basically just with your interest in all of my writing projects even for fandoms you’re not technically in!! i’ve never really been told by anyone that i’ve got a way with words and when you told me that i was like wow!! people actually like the shit i write, that’s cool! that’s real cool my guy10: What’s your biggest writer pet-peeve?      honestly i THRIVE on feedback. i took a huge writing break like a few years ago just because i couldn’t WRITE the way i used to. to just sit down and spew out 5000 word chapters on a whim wasn’t something i could feasibly DO anymore. i thought i lost my touch or something but it was honestly just because i didn’t get enough feedback. again shout out to u meander because you legit FLOODED me with feedback on like. everything. i’m still over the moon about half the shit you’ve told me like a year ago. tbh half the reason i yell in the tags is because creators read the tags!! they really do!! so i wanna leave some positive feedback for them because i want them to know that i liked whatever it was that they made!!

13: What’s your favorite writing quote?       it’s not really a writing quote but!! “Friendship is unnecessary, like philosophy, like art…. It has no survival value; rather it is one of those things which give value to survival.” -C.S. Lewis21: Do you outline?      i honestly burst out laughing when i saw this question, i do not in any way whatsoever outline anything bc apparently i hate myself. ok the last time i outlined a story was like four years ago and it worked…. really well…… so for some reason i was like wow how about we not make our lives easier. no outlining our fics we ruin our own writing projects like men

28: Which do you find hardest: the beginning, the middle, or the end?      everything, everything is hard, i can’t write in a linear fashion. nah but tbh i feel like it’s the middle? like what do you even do. what is the middle all about. i’ve never met her32: How do you feel about friends and close relatives reading your work?      ABSOLUTELY NOT. get them away. i am very protective of my writing bc it’s personal to me. like i don’t want y’all reading my shit and then going up to me in real life thinking you know all my secrets bc if u read my shit you WILL know all my secrets, i painstakingly pour my heart into everything i write because in everything i do, i try REALLY REALLY hard. if i let u read my writing it’s a show of trust33: Are you interested in having your work published?      in its current state? probably not!! maybe later on down the road would be nice, but i’ve still got a lot to learn //side-eyes all my failed attempts at witty dialogue35: What’s your favorite time of day for writing?      nighttime. like dead of the night, i’m in bed with my phone and should be asleep right now but instead i’m gonna grab my laptop and fucking dump out all the words in my brain onto this word document. other than that i honestly just write during school a lot? like when we get free time i’m either studying for a test or writing.47: If you could steal one character from another author and make then yours, who would it be and why?      i want to take preston garvey out of bethesda’s hands. i’ve fallen in love with him over the course of just writing one scene for his character study. it’s the second-to-last scene (bc i cant write in linear order) and like. gosh. i want him to be my character, he’s so sad but also so optimistic and he tries so hard. ok those kinds of characters are my Type, i love characters who try really hard 

50: If you could live in any fictional world, which would it be?      i’m honestly not really sure? like hardcore i love daydreaming but it’s never about myself doing cool things, it’s about characters doing cool things. i kinda wanna meet an omnic tho, they seem really chill. maybe like live in falkreath? it’s really chill and pretty there and the mountains are really looming and i like that. imagine meeting the dragonborn and they buy out your entire store and then just leave. thats fucking crazy my guy

[empressdrega27]

do the ship meme u reblogged a little bit ago with you and akh!!

Bless you Nonny~

How did they they meet?

I met Ahk when some people who aren’t very fond of me sent a very special book of mine to another dimension to spite me. I followed my book and wound up in a museum, and after retrieving said book, the museum came to life. Not wanting to be seen by the inhabitants (as i’m a dragon hybrid creature), I jumped to the second floor to escape. Once there, I heard a horrible scream, and I ran towards it to help. I found that the screaming was coming from a sarcophagus, and even though I was afraid of what might be inside, I opened it anyways. The person inside stepped out and revealed themselves to be a gorgeous man with an amazing voice! He asked to meet his rescuer, but I told him I didn’t want to scare him. He insisted, and so I stepped out of the shadows. He smiled at me, introduced himself, and told me that he wasn’t afraid. He then offered me a reward for saving him, and I told him that all I wanted was to be his friend, for finding someone who wasn’t afraid of me is rare. Ahk said, “My friendship is yours, you had it the moment you set me free”, and with that, he became my best friend, and later, so much more~

Who developed romantic feelings first?

Honestly, I’m not sure. I think we developed our feelings at roughly the same time, so it’s hard to say who actually fell first.

Who is their biggest “shipper?”

To be honest, the whole museum knew that we were hardcore crushing on each other, but I think Sacagawea and Attila are the two biggest shippers! Sac is a mother figure of sorts to Ahk, and she was always trying to gently nudge him into confessing to me, and Attila was super impressed with my strength and we became pretty good friends. He tried to tell me that it was obvious that Ahk felt the same way, but as I’m a dense and oblivious idiot when it comes to feelings, I continued to deny Attila’s advice. Jed and Octavius also were big shippers of us, but they weren’t as actively trying to get us together.

When did they have their first kiss and under what circumstances?

Our first kiss happened shortly after we confessed to each other, and it was a moment I’ll never forget. I was so nervous and worried that it was all just a dream and that I’d wake up anytime, alone. Ahk said he felt the same, and he was scared of waking up back in his sarcophagus. We laughed a bit and he scooted closer to me and said, “You are so beautiful, Elizabeth”. And he kissed me! After we pulled apart, I asked if we could kiss again, and we did~

Who confessed their feelings first?

We confessed in a weird way. The entire start of our relationship was weird tbh. I’d been falling into a depression relapse and my dumb brain had been telling me that Ahk would never feel the same way about me as I did for him. I tried to talk my feelings out with Attila and the Huns, but eventually, I broke down. I was crying and pacing and basically screaming at myself saying, “Look at me!! I’m a monster! I’m hideous! Ahkmenrah is perfect, how could he ever love something like me?!” At that, Ahk comes out of the shadows, “You’re wrong”, he says. I jump and try to rub the tears off of my face, and he comes closer. “You’re not hideous. You’re the most exquisite creature I’ve ever known, and you’re no monster. I’ve loved you from the moment you and I retrieved the tablet from Cecil.” I’m shocked, “You…. you love me? You think I’m beautiful?” He nods and leads me to a bench to sit down, where he continues to tell me all the times he tried to confess, only to lose his nerve. He was worried that he was too ordinary to be with me. In the end, we laughed about the whole thing, and afterwards, we had our first kiss~

What was their first official date?

Our first official date was on a Thursday, and it came about when Ahk read about modern dating and asked me what kind of dates I’d been on. I told him that I’d never actually been on a date, and that was when he stood up and said that he was going to take me on one then. We looked for a restaurant that was open, and all we found that was close by was an IHOP. Thus, we went to IHOP for our first date, and it was the best date I’ve ever been on!

How do they feel about double dates/group dates?

We love them! So long as we enjoy the company of the people we’re hanging out with, we absolutely love double dates and group dates!

What do they do in their down time?

On our downtime, we usually either hang out around our house, or we visit our friends. When we stay home, we do any number of things, video games, reading in the library, swimming, and horseback riding are all things we do often~

What was the first meeting of parents as an official couple like?

Meeting Ahk’s parents was terrifying. And (just as I predicted) they hated me. They wanted Ahk to marry an Egyptian woman of royal blood, and they were convinced that I was using Ahk for some nefarious purpose. They finally figured out that I was genuinely devoted to him and now Ahk’s mother thinks of me as her daughter in law. His father on the other hand still doesn’t approve, but he keeps his mouth shut cuz he knows there’s nothing he can do about it. Ahk meeting my mom and my father figures went amazingly though! Everyone loves Ahk, and anyone with a brain can see that he adores me.

What was their first fight over and how did they get past it?

Our first fight came about when Ahk was having really bad nightmares about something, and he wouldn’t tell me what the nightmares were about. That was fine with me, I know how hard it is to talk about really bad dreams, but he started getting really short tempered with me every time I asked what was wrong. Finally, the last straw came when I asked yet again if he was okay, and he lost it. He yelled that I had no idea what it was like to die and that I couldn’t possibly understand how he felt. I was shocked, and as I don’t cope well with people shouting at me, I started crying. I told him that I did know what it was like to die and that all I wanted to do was help him. His tone and demeanor were cold and he roughly explained that his past was far too painful to speak about and that I should leave because he needed to be alone for a while. I managed to choke out a “fine”, before making a brisk exit. It was then that he realized that I was crying and he seemed to realize how much of an ass he was being, cuz a few minutes later, he went looking for me. Unfortunately, I’d been called on a mission and I had to leave the museum, and I wasn’t able to return until 3 days later. Ahk believed I’d left for good and had become despondent. When he knew I hadn’t left for good, he was overjoyed and he apologized for acting the way he did, and I apologized for not only pushing him to talk about something that made him uncomfortable, but also for intentionally continuing with my mission to the point of nearly killing myself from exhaustion. Because that’s what I almost did. We got past it because we were both miserable to the point of wanting to die the entire time we were apart, and that’s a pretty clear indicator that you really, really love someone. Ahk understood that he needed to talk about what was bothering him and I understood that I needed to give him the time to actually be comfortable doing that.

Which one is more easily made jealous?

Me. Ahk is a very attractive man, it’s understandable that people would wanna flirt with him. It’s not the flirting that bothers me, it’s when the people completely disregard that Ahk isn’t single, or say things like “that’s your girlfriend? you can do way better, like me for example”. That’s not to say that Ahk doesn’t get jealous too, but it’s mostly me.

What is their favorite thing to get to eat?

Ahk loves fried stuff, candy, cake, and gelato! I have no clue why Ahk has a taste for fried chicken, funnel cake, and onion rings, but he loves that stuff and I have multiple people who will confirm that watching him demolish a bucket of fried chicken is a sight to behold. As for me, I love sushi, pasta, chocolate, and meat. I have a super fast metabolism, so I need to eat often to keep up my energy, and starchy carb filled, fatty, big meals are perfect for me~

Who’s the cuddly one? What their favorite cuddling position?

That would be Ahk! Not to say I’m not cuddly, but Ahk is always leaping into my arms or hugging me, so we’ll say he’s the really cuddly one. His favorite cuddling position is any position where he can lay his forehead against mine. He’s sappy like that (i am too lmao)

Are they hand holders?

We are indeed! It’s nice to be able to hold your lover’s hand as you’re walking or watching a movie or something.

How long do they wait before sleeping together for the first time? What’s the circumstances?

Eheh, we waited about a month to take our relationship to the next level. It would’ve been less time, but I’m shy and I didn’t think Ahk would be interested in me like that (I was very wrong lmao). We finally got on with it when I got a sudden burst of brazen energy and took my shirt off in front of him.

Who tops?

Depends on who’s in the mood to top, could be either one. Or both in one night~

What’s the worst first they’ve ever gotten into?

I’m gonna assume this is supposed to say fight, and the answer is the fight I mentioned above. It was the first real fight, and also the worst. Namely though, it was the last really big fight, and we’ve done our best to keep it that way. Neither of us wants to relive the horrible way we felt after being separated in that way and for that long.

Who does the shopping and the cooking?

Me and me again. Ahk helps with both, but I’m the one who does it primarily. Ahk is still learning the ins and outs of cooking with a stove, and he’d get way too distracted at the grocery store if he went by himself. I love him, bu his curiosity gets the best of him at times!

Which one is more organized and prone to tidiness?

Ahk is more organized, while I’m more prone to untidiness. Ahk is more mathematically minded, so he’s naturally more organized and methodical. I on the other hand would much rather just wing it and have things be wherever. If i lose something, I can just summon it. Ahk ends up cleaning and tidying things for me anyways though (bless him).

Who proposes?

I think Ahk would beat me too it, but I would have an ornate dagger to propose to him with if I propose first! He’d probably propose to me with a necklace or bracelet rather than a ring.

Do they have joined Bachelor/Bacheloette parties or separate?

Separate, but methinks we’d end up getting bored and we’d sneak away to hang out together~

Who is the best man/maid of honour? Any other groomsmen or bridesmaids?

My maids of honor would be my friends Anisha and Nocta, along with my three best friends, Kid, Wally, and Simon. Ahk’s best man would most likely be Octavius or Nicky, with his groomsmen being Attila, Teddy, and Sacagawea.

Big Ceremony or Small?

We have lots of friends (and we rule a planet) so a big ceremony is a must!

Do they have a honeymoon? If so, where?  

We do indeed have a honeymoon, and we go on a huge world tour, visiting every city we can!

Do they have children? How many?

We can’t have biological children together, but we will adopt! As for how many, I think we’ll adopt one or two and once they grow up, we’ll adopt one or two more, and we’ll keep doing that for as long as we live or until there are no abandoned children left in the world~

[sftyngs]

BTS Orchestra! AU | Seokjin

Ya girl is back with more bts orchestra! au’s, also imagine kim soekjin in the all black concert attire IM–

anyways, enjoy!

Jimin ver. | Yoongi ver.

oh man

this one is gonna be gr8

ok so Kim Seokjin is like a fucking prodigY

he’s that one kid who plays like every instrument in the string orchestra pluS does banD aNd choir

but his true love is orchestra ok he don’t joke around with his precious orch

also he’s super good too like wtf

everyone is lowkey jealous but highkey in love with him oK

anyways he started off playing violin freshman year

he was probably second chair too bc his audition was perFect

then sophomore year he switched to cello and then halfway through the year played bass bc (“Seokjin can you play bass this semester, I know you’ve never pla–” “ok”)(and he was one of the best fucking bass players the orchestra has had, next to Min Yoongi of course)

but then found his true love pLaying VioLA OMG

he’s the one kid that always has to start shit with the cellos about what instrument is the beSt (but the cellos are always like “dude wtf u played cello” and he’s always like “sO”)

is the viola first chair but sometimes leads the viola and violin sections in sectionals

gets really defensive when someone says violas are lame

gives them the stink eye and then ignores them and then that person feels v bad and apologizes bc (“yoU inSULTEd SeokJin oPPA hOw dArE–”)

he even has his own lil fan club within the music department

like all the girls in orchestra and choir and band all bonded over the fact that they all think Kim Seokjin is so beautIFUL

he knows about it but doesn’t really say anything and when someone (Yoongi) brings it up he’s like “whEn wiLl u evEr YoOngi”

ok let’s be real here he’s best friends with dearest Yoongi who plays the bass and piano

he’s like one of the only people who can actually talk to him and make yoongi laugh but also give him extreme secondhand embarrassment

like seokjin is always telling dad jokes and making stupid puns 1. Bc he thinks he’s hilarious and 2. Bc it makes Yoongi cringe so much he has to leave the room for a few seconds

its gr8, jokes aside(literally) they have a tru bromance its cute

anYWAYS when seokjin plays solos during practice all the girls sigh bc wOw (his solos always have people crying)

nOw, you do both orchestra and tennis so sometimes u miss practices for both and it’s kinda hectic but u love it

tbh you love orchestra like it’s one of ur favorite extracurricular activities but like kiM SeoKjIn makeS u sO nervOus omFG

like u didn’t even know Jin knew ur name until he turned around in his seat and asked you if you had any rosin

ur a viola player btw u sit behind seokjin and its v nerve racking bc sometimes the second chair viola isn’t there and neither is ur stand partner so the conductor makes u sit up next to Seokjin and its like fUck ‘doNt makE anY mistAkeS’

anyways Jin was like “hey Y/n do you have any rosin”

you literally stop tuning ur viola and stare at him bc “you know my name?”

Jin rolls his eyes and tbh looks offended

“yes I know ur name why wouldn’t I, I know everyone’s name”

and ur like “,,,,,??? Bc u never talk to me”

and he’s like baffled bc he taLks to evEryoNe whY doeSnt he talK to yOu

“I’m pretty sure we’ve had a conversation before”

and ur like “nope”

“what about that one time at the spring concert when we talked while tuning the kid’s instruments”

“that wasn’t even me seokjin” 

 ,,,,,,,”oh” 

so Jin is like “well from now on I’m going to have a conversation with you every day 

and ur like WH a t 

and he like smiles and ur like GshdBDBSKZJGDDB FU KF 

and he keeps his promise okay the next few days u go to practice and when he sees you he says hi and asks you how ur doing and at first ur were like wtf leave me alone but after the second day ur like okay I guess I can roll with this 

then the day after that u don’t come to practice bc like hey u gotta go to tennis practice 

and Jin is so confused bc he has a stREAK GOING 

so he asks around and then like one of the other violists is like “lol u didn’t know??“ 

and for a second Seokjin panics bc WhTA IF SOMETHING HAPPENED

and the kid is like "they’re on the tennis team they always go to practice on this day”

and Jin just stares at the kid like ,,,,wh a t

so throughout the whole practice Seokjin is like “how do I do this, why diDNT THEY TELL ME IM–”

so after practice he finishes cleaning up and stacking chairs and stands bc hES A SAINT

and then he’s out the door highkey speed walking over to the tennis courts bC HE IS NOT LOSING HIS STREAK BUt also bc he really wants to see with his own eyes u playing on the tennis team

when he finds you on the courts ur like doing suicide runs bc someone on ur team insulted the coach and now y'all are in trouble

ur cursing said person out bc “dude wtf whY wOULD YOU—”

and Seokjin is just like staring bc wow he didn’t know you did tennis

and he just stands there staring like he’s seen the most amazing thing in the world

after u finish suicide runs one of your team members goes to get a drink of water and they’re like "are you looking for someone?”

and Seokjin is like “oh yeah I’m just waiting for y/n”

so ur teammate shouts back at you and their like “HEY Y/N YOUR BOYFRIEND IS HERE”

and u turn around bc ur like “ w haT”

and when u see Seokjin, he does like this lil wave and smiles at you with that gorgeous smile and gOD u want to meLt into the groUnd bc kIM SEOKjiN

everyone starts whistling and catcalling you two and ur just like “shUT UP”

jin decides to play along and when you walk up to him he throws his arms around you and screams “jAGIYA I MISSED YOU”

and ur whole team just starts yelling and hooting and wolf whistling at you two and you can’t keep ur cheeks and ears from heating up

so u drag Seokjin by the hand to where the locker rooms are and your like ?????? “What is it”

and Jin is just like “I didn’t know you played tennis”

and ur like “that’s because you never talk to me”

so he’s like “weLL that’s why I’m here, you can’t just break my streak like that y/n”

but ur like “everyone knows I don’t go to practice today”

"i diDNT KNOW”

u get up real close and touch his chest lightly with ur index finger, and u can hear his breath stutter bc wow heLlO

“well now you do”

Kim Seokjin is ShOokT

and then u start to walk back to the tennis courts before your coach gives u more suicides

and u can hear Jin running up to you and then he’s like “go out with me”

and you stop and ur like “whA t”

Jin can’t really understand what the fuck he just said either but fuCK IT

He like shrugs and he’s like “go on a date with me on Saturday”

and u just stare at him for a few seconds and then,,,,,“ok”

seokjin is lowkey in shock bc wow you really said yes

“I’ll see u around Kim Seokjin” and then ur walking back to the courts and Jin just keeps staring after u bc wow

halfway home he’s like !!!!!?????? “I SONT HAVE THEIR NUMBER WHT THE FUCK KIM SEOKJIN”

and he startles Yoongi so bad he almost crashes the car and Yoongi is like “hYUNG WHAT THE FUCK”

but Jin can’t think bc he’s scrolling through his contacts to see if he has someone’s number who will possibly have your number

after Yoongi starts driving again he’s like “whAT are u even looking fOr”

and Jin is like “I ASKED Y/N ON A DATE AND I DONT EVEN HAVE THEIR NUMBER”

he’s kinda lowkey whining and almost crying

Yoongi is so ready to slap his friend bc–“hyUNG WHAT THE FUCK I ALMOST CRASHED BC OF THAT”

but he sees the distress on seokjin’s face and he’s like “okokok look I have their number I’ll just give it to you”

and Seokjin gasps really loud and he’s like “REALLY”

Yoongi just nods

“wait why do u have their number” insert suspicious and slightly jealous Kim Seokjin

“we were once in a quintet and I needed their number to give them a ride chill hyung”

hhHhhhHhmMmMmMmmMMM

anyways Yoongi gives Jin your number and sends him on his merry fucking way 

gOd he can’t believe he’s friends with him

anyways Jin texts you later in the day asking if he has the right number

and your like ,,,,,,????? How u have my number

seokjin is like “Yoongi gave it to me I hope u don’t mind”

and ur like “lmao ok,,,,,”

u think it’s cute he was too shy and forgot to ask for ur number

anyways u arrange details for the date and oh boy oh boy u both are hella nervous but still excited

finally the day arrives and both of u are like holy sHIT this is acTUALLY HAPPENING

ok not to be lame but like u both are music dorks and so Seokjin decides to take u to see a symphony concert and little does he know that they’re playing ur favorite piece and when u get to the concert hall ur like ????? “Can u read minDs”

and he’s like “n-no…why? Do u not like it????? I thought it would be n-nice,,,,,wE caN gO somEwhEre eLse if u wNt”

but u just beam at him bc “Seokjin idk how u knew this was my favorite symphony piece ever but this is honestly the nicest thing anyone has ever done thank u so much”

he melts, he’s like so close to just kissing u then and there bc “I think I’m in love o fuCk”

so u guys get the tickets and walk inside and ur so excited ur basically skipping up the escalators

seokjin has never seen someone look so beautiful,,,,,,,wOw

when u get to ur seats ur like !!!!!!! “ThIS IS SUCH A GOOD VIEW SEOKJIN WOW”

Jin just keeps look at u bc he can’t get enough of u

from the moment the first player starts tuning and practicing before the actual concert starts u are so enthralled like holy moly

then the actual music starts and oh boy

there’s this look of pure bliss and love on ur face Seokjin can’t describe it but he loves it so much

bc he’s never found anyone who can really appreciate classical music on the same kind of level as him

there’s a certain part in the song that has u gripping Seokjin’s hand like ur life depends on it

he’s pretty sure he saw some tears in ur eyes at some point

whenever there is a viola solo you two hardcore freak out bc those are so raRE

and he’s just honestly so content sitting there and listening to beautiful music and looking at someone just as amazing 

man he has it bAd

at some point u two just end up holding hands bc it feels nice and just comfortable

towards the middle of the concert u see a married couple sitting in front of you who is like falling asleep and u start giggling

and u nudge Seokjin to get his attention and he looks at u like ?????  even tho u look cute, why u giggling

and u subtly point at the couple and when he sees he stares for a while before he starts shaking bc he’s trying not to make any noise as he laughs

this makes u laugh more and soon u both are just a giggling mess and people are starting to throw u looks

at this point u both don’t care bc ur so gone and the guy’s head is lolling around and his wife is trying to both stay awake and wake up her husband and oh man

u hide ur face in Seokjin’s shoulder bc u just can’t and ur trying to calm down enough to pay attention to the concert and Jin just thinks it’s really cute and he’s like !!!!!!!!!!!!

also not to mention ur like ‘his bicep is so firm’

once the concert is over u wait for everyone to leave and u two just sit there bc wow that was so beautiful

u look over at Jin and ur like “thanks so much for this, you have no idea how much it means to me”

he smiles at u and intertwines your fingers and he’s like “my pleasure”

you two keep looking at each other bc u two just can’t believe ur here with a person u both care about

then u both start leaning towards each other

and slowly but surely you two kiss

and it’s the most gentlest thing ever

like his lips feel so nice on urs and vice versa

Jin doesn’t want to pressure u so he takes his time and once he pulls away he just stares at you and smiles the sweetest smile

ur just like “wow…”

then the ushers are kicking u two out bc “excuse me, the concert is over, you can’t stay here please exit thank you”

u two are like o riGht

whilst walking out Seokjin is like “man I’m so glad I asked u for rosin that day”

ur like ?????? “u know this could have happened faster if you haD TALKED TO ME BEFORE”

and Seokjin is like "I SWEAR TO GOD WE’VE HAD A CONVERSATION BEFORE OK, FIGHT ME ON THIS Y/N”

u just snort and walk towards the car

and Jin runs after u like “jAGIYA WAIT”

“j-JAGIYA?????!!!!”

oh man Kim Seokjin is sO whIpPed for yoU

but so are u ok its fine its ok 

Bonus:

on the following Monday u two walk into orchestra practice together holding hands

lots of stares and open mouths

someone dropped their bow while staring 

“what do u mean u two are together wh AT”