#but sometimes i look at a clock in a dream because i'm anxious about sleeping too late then i wake up and check the time like an hour later

[argiopi]

taking a nap in your friend’s bed and lucid dreaming that you are at the store and thinking “you’re dreaming why are you at the fucking store. leave” then your alarm rings

[lefaystrent]

Me, Myself, and These Guys Who Kinda Look Like Me Ch. 7

Fandom: Sanders Sides

Pairings: Thomas/The Sides

Summary: It starts with dreams. Then Thomas starts seeing the dream people in the waking world.

Thomas doesn't know how to bring it up to anybody or if he even should at this point.

AKA, Thomas has to acknowledge the six colorful characters in the room, much to their long-awaited delight.

Ao3 Link: click here

Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Chapter 4, Chapter 5, Chapter 6

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"I believe you wanted a conversation? Let's talk."

And so they do.

Rules are established to assist with boundaries, and in the days that follow, they are adjusted as they adapt.

Rule number one: Thomas's bedroom is a sacred temple. When the door is shut, no one shall utilize incorporeal states of being to trespass. Anyone may knock as needed, but it's up to Thomas if he'd like company. Likewise, if the door is open, it is understood that company is welcome.

Seems simple enough, right?

Thomas wakes up to the sound of his bedroom door creaking open. He scrubs the sleep from his eyes, peering at the alarm clock to see he's been asleep all of three hours.

"Whass it?" Thomas mumbles and pushes up clumsily. He thinks something must be wrong, or that he must not have heard a knock. Maybe he's dreaming. Wouldn't be the first time that he thought he woke up in a dream.

The door practically slams closed.

"Eh?"

Is he...being spied on? What did they want? Who was it? Why did they have to wake him? Can he lay back down and go to sleep? Wow, that was loud. And rude. Or something's wrong. What's wrong? Was he having a nightmare? He thinks he was having a nightmare. There was a math test involved. Ew.

The door opens again, wider this time. Virgil hovers in the doorway, shoulders hiked up to his ears and shame-faced.

"I am so sorry," he blurts out. "I didn't mean to do that. Or wake you. I'll go."

"No, no, what's wrong?" Thomas calls back before the door can close. Sleep dust cakes his eyes, but he's got half a brain functioning. He can tell something's off.

"It's stupid," Virgil deflects, as if that is a compelling defense.

"S'not stupid. What's up, buttercup?"

Wow, Thomas really is only half awake. The only reason his head hasn't reacquainted itself with his pillow is because of his propped-up arm. His eyes don't get the memo. They droop down, closed.

Virgil doesn't answer.

Huh.

Thomas has a sneaking suspicion he'll have to open his eyes again.

"Virge?"

"I, uh, I was just checking on you. In case anyone was trying to break in. Or if you had fallen. Or if there was a gas leak. There could be a gas leak right now. You never know, ya know?"

"...eh?"

"Anyway, I'm dumb, go back to sleep dude. Sorry."

And the door shuts once more, more mindful this time.

If it had just been Virgil, Thomas thinks he could have puzzled through it. Clearly Virgil is the anxious sort. After the fire incident, Virgil has insisted on being present whenever cooking is involved. Even if he's not the one cooking, he wants to watch like a hawk. It's like his own personal lifeguard, but on land. In his house. This is a perfect analogy.

Thomas can hella relate to having anxiety. Most people, when they meet Thomas, mistake him for being an extrovert. And that can be an exhausting image to keep up, but Thomas is an actor after all. Regardless, he wants to cut Virgil some slack. With the installment of the new rules, he's having trouble adjusting, and that's okay. It's all part of the learning process.

Virgil confides that sometimes he would check on Thomas in the middle of the night (or day, curse Thomas's sleeping habits) to soothe his random bursts of paranoia. Thomas sympathizes, he does. If something happens to Thomas and he dies, what happens to the dream people? Where do they go?

It's not just Virgil though. Roman and Remus keep forgetting about the knocking rule.

Thomas dives headfirst back into work the first chance he gets. He sits at his desk in his bedroom, screen displaying a script. It's the final countdown so to speak, and Thomas is delaying the inevitable because the perfectionist in him tells him it's not good enough. There's something missing. It could be better. It can always be better.

"You should throw in a 'Mean Girls' reference there at the end."

Thomas glances towards the bottom of the script. He tilts his head. "Yeah, you're right, I could wear a pink shirt."

"Exactly."

It takes a moment, but Thomas frowns and looks to his right where Roman is reading the script happily over his shoulder.

"I thought I had my door closed..."

The faint smile on Roman's face freezes. His body tenses so hard Thomas can almost feel it vicariously. "Uh...yeaaah."

"Roman."

"...I may have forgotten you can see us."

"..."

"...how mad are you?"

Thomas isn't mad. He understands that it will take time. For years they've lived a certain way. He doesn't expect things to change overnight. However, this has to be corrected. In order to do that, Thomas has to be firm in the boundaries he's set.

Thomas takes one look at Roman's obvious dejection and caves hard.

"Do you want to help me edit the rest?" he asks.

Enforcing boundaries is difficult, okay?! Really, he has no one to blame but himself. He's a sucker. A big softie sucker.

When he discusses this with Logan, the man comforts him by parsing out the reasons behind why he struggles to say no.

"Give me an example," Logan instructs.

"Well, just last night I was laying in bed trying to go to sleep... okay I might have been scrolling on my phone. But anyway! I was in bed, and then the closet door opened."

"Remus?"

"Remus."

"He has a fascination with closets that baffles me beyond comprehension."

"I've noticed. It was kinda spooky at first, which I think was the point. But he ended up coming out and started talking to me."

"Was that all? Sorry, that sounded dismissive, let me rephrase. Is that the only actions he took?"

"Uh...pretty much? He sat beside my bed on the floor and just talked about random things. Like dolphins and Catholicism."

"He has a rather stream of consciousness mentality to the way he jumps from one topic to the other. I believe he only wished to engage you in conversation, albeit at an inopportune time."

"Yeah..."

"Based on the context of this conversation, I guess that you allowed that conversation to continue without interruption?"

Thomas did. He had put down his phone and it invigorated Remus to have Thomas's undivided attention. It's like he'd been saving up years' worth of ideas for this moment.

And Thomas... Thomas didn't want to take that away from him.

"Yeah, I did," Thomas admits meekly, as if he'd been in the wrong. Was it so wrong of him?

Janus sweeps by them on his way to peruse Thomas's book collection. Thomas would think it's an excuse to eavesdrop if Janus hadn't been spending the past few days with his nose in a book. At the very least, he may be taking his sweet time going about it, thumbing through the options.

Janus does indeed reveal he's been listening by commenting, "You're not going to offend him if you tell him to go away, if that's what you're worried about."

"That's not..." Thomas rubs his knuckles together. He squints his eyes as if that will reveal his feelings better. "I don't want to tell anyone to go away."

Janus shrugs and doesn't say anything further. His silence rattles Thomas more than what he could say. It leaves him thinking on it more.

Logan taps at his chin and Thomas waits for him to make sense of this for him. "Perhaps not to go away then. If it is reframed more politely as you saying, 'I am interested in this topic, but as I am busy at the moment, could we discuss this at a later time?' Would that be preferential?"

Still no. Thomas shakes his head.

"What do you believe would happen if you did say something along those lines?"

Thomas imagines it. He imagines cutting off Remus. How it would kill the light in his eyes. He thinks of pushing Roman out of his room. How he'd feel betrayed after Thomas promised to entertain his dreams. He pictures Virgil at his door, Thomas snapping at him to leave him alone. How Virgil would think he doesn't appreciate him.

"I don't want to make them feel bad," Thomas says at length. "And I don't want them to hate me."

Logan places a hand on his shoulder. It's solid and grounding, and for a moment Logan is almost distracted by the contact but pushes through it.

"Remember what we discussed the other day? And how Virgil verbalized a similar fear? That he was afraid you would hate us? You are jumping to a false conclusion and imagining the worst-case scenario. This is known as catastrophizing."

"Besides that," Janus adds, comparing two books in his hands, "if voicing what makes you uncomfortable makes someone upset, then they obviously only care about their own self-interests."

Logan nods in agreement. "For relationships to succeed, communication must take place in some form. If you struggle to verbalize your needs, I would like to propose an alternative."

The proposal is Thomas's stuffed bear Benjamin.

It's wonderfully simple, if a little silly. Whenever one of them has forgotten themselves and phase through a door or wall they should not have, Thomas hands them the bear. It's a wordless gesture that says, "I see you, I'm not mad at you, this is just a reminder." Surprisingly, everyone is supportive of the idea.

Maybe a little too supportive. They are so eager to not overstep into Thomas's life that they frequently overcompensate. As Benjamin becomes an accepted part of Thomas expressing his need for space, Thomas picks up on how much the others are reluctant to voice their need for space. Or their wants in general.

"You guys can come to me if you need anything," Thomas had told them during their heart-to-heart the other day. "If there's anything I can do for you, just let me know."

They said sure.

They didn't lie. They're just afraid.

The most Thomas has gotten out of them is Logan and Roman expressing interest in aiding Thomas with meal prep. It's okay now and then, but Thomas makes it clear that it's not necessary and that he absolutely should still be responsible in making his own meals occasionally or order takeout. Logan sketches out a weekly schedule to assist in everyone's expectations, and Roman lists all of the recipes he would like to try.

It's not that fair though. It's for Thomas. The others can't exactly eat.

Or....can they?

"I know you guys don't need to, but have you tried eating?" Thomas asks them. They're sitting at the dining table, a notebook between them.

"Many a time," Roman says. "Every time you eat cookies, Patton tries to steal some. And don't get me started on when you bring donuts home. Logan-"

Logan butts in, "Ahem, Thomas doesn't need that many details, thank you Roman," He fidgets with the pen in his hands, tapping it against the wired spirals of the notebook.

Roman jerks his head in Logan's direction while giving Thomas a look that screams Logan would very much like to try a donut.

Thomas holds back a grin. "But what about lately? Since you guys can touch things better now."

Logan shares a glance with Roman. "There's no need. We don't feel hunger. However..."

"Is it possible?" Roman ties into his thoughts.

"To what end? Do we have a working digestive tract? Could the food be converted to energy? Or would it phase through us at a certain point?"

"There's only one way to find out."

Thomas gets up to scrounge around his kitchen. He thinks he should really go grocery shopping soon; he's running low on quick snacks. He settles for some pretzel sticks and returns to the table.

"Who wants to go first?" he asks.

Logan gestures to the bag for Roman, showing he would rather observe. Roman plucks the pretzel bag from Thomas's hands and stares at the packaging curiously. Cautiously, he removes the clamp sealing it closed and pulls out a stick.

"Can you smell it?" Logan asks.

Roman's face pinches in minor disgust. "Why would I smell it? I'm supposed to taste it, Sub-astute Teacher."

"Smell is entwined with the ability to taste. Without it, perception of flavors would be extremely limited."

"Oh, well," Roman says and gives the stick a whiff. Then he gives it a bigger whiff.

"Anything?"

"I guess? It's different. I don't think pretzel sticks have a strong smell anyway, do they?"

"Go ahead and try it."

Roman nibbles the stick. They observe his jaw movements and listen to the muffled crunching of his teeth. He chews mechanically, much longer than anyone would need to. His brows raise just about to his hairline as he swallows.

"It's salty!" he announces excitedly. "I hate it! I can taste it! And I hate it!"

Roman tosses the rest of the stick in his mouth and plunders into the bag for more. Thomas and Logan watch incredulously as he polishes off the whole bag. Roman never stops telling them about how horrible they taste. He finishes the bag and smacks his mouth.

"Ugh, it's so dry!"

Thomas wordlessly retrieves Roman a cup of juice. Roman gleefully downs the glass in one go.

"That's so much better! What is this? It's so sweet!"

"Apple juice?"

"I love apple juice! Logan! I love apple juice!"

"Yes, I have gathered."

"I must tell all of my friends about this!"

That evening, they gather round the kitchen with everyone to taste test everything in Thomas's fridge and cabinets. If Thomas needed to go grocery shopping before, he certainly needs to after this. They have no limits to their stomach capacities. Patton eats a giant stack of peanut butter and jelly sandwiches and claims he feels no fuller for the effort. Virgil scarfs down an entire tub of rocky road ice cream with such feral intensity that he's left abashed after.

"It was okay, I guess," Virgil says too nonchalantly.

"Who let this raccoon in here?" Janus comments, to which Virgil hisses.

"If we can eat things now, does that mean we'll need to shit?" Remus questions. He's found the pickle jar and is sharing with Logan. They seem to enjoy salty/sour flavors more. "Because then Virgil's gonna have the shits later."

"That was an intolerable amount of lactose," Logan agrees.

Roman whines in protest through a mouth full of pizza, "Must you speak of such crass things while we're eating?"

"It's not like we're real humans," Virgil says, but looks doubtfully at the empty ice cream container while holding his tummy.

Janus has discovered the beauty of wine and has been sipping religiously at a glass. "Real enough to eat."

"Are you feeling the effects of the alcohol?" Logan pauses to wonder.

"I don't think so, but I'm nothing if not determined."

"Spitters are quitters," Remus says, finding some kind of relevance with that train of thought to the current context. When Virgil smirks and says something about professionals gargling, Roman screeches like a banshee. Thomas thinks that is the point of Virgil's interference. He shares a fist bump with Remus.

"Anyway, back to our shit talking," Remus says peppily. Roman's face turns an impressive shade of red.

Janus snickers into his glass, "Oh I am here for shit talking. Who are we shit talking about?"

"Your mom!"

"How very original, Remus."

"Is it okay if I eat the rest of this peanut butter?" Patton asks Thomas. There's not much left in the jar anyway.

Thomas smiles. "Go for it, buddy."

Patton does a happy little shuffle dance and goes to town. The others go back to questioning if they will need to start using the bathroom now. Thomas asks what Patton thinks, since they're standing by each other and he hasn't been talking much.

Patton nods slowly, sagely. "Everybody poops."

As much as Roman is hilariously uncomfortable with the topic, everyone does share a curiosity to the limits of their corporealness. For the rest of the evening, they keep checking in with each other. "Need to poop yet?" "No, you?" "Nah, need to pee?" "Nah, but how would we know?" "It'd be instinctive." "You're instinctive." "Remus, please desist."

Thomas can confidentially say that he's never been a part of a more bizarre conversational topic.

For those at home wondering, none of them ever felt the urge to go. They are left to surmise that the food and drinks they ingest are entirely utilized with no leftover waste. Furthermore, alcohol has no affect, much to Janus's dismay. It doesn't stop him from trying.

Beyond food, Thomas tries to encourage the others to ask him for things they want. Something as simple as watching a movie is a challenge. If they sit down together to pick a movie, it always comes back to what does Thomas want to watch. And even when Thomas isn't watching TV or doing anything with his electronics, they will jump up from them as if electrocuted and ask him if he'd like the TV or computer.

Patton's the worst about it. Thomas nearly felt bad about telling him, "No, I'm good, you can keep watching whatever." It's like he can't believe he isn't monopolizing Thomas's belongings. So they get into "nice-offs" where they're trying to be courteous to each other. "No, you can." "No, you, I insist!" That sort of thing. There's an edge of panic to Patton when he does this.

If only this were as easy as handing him a stuffed bear.

After a few times, Thomas can't stand to see him this way and finally grabs the offered tv remote out of his hands. The brief relief that washes over Patton is replaced by confusion when Thomas sets the remote on the coffee table. Then confusion transforms into astonishment as Thomas grabs one of his hands in both of his.

"Patton, you're okay," Thomas tells him. "You're allowed to enjoy yourself. I don't always need the tv, and whenever I do want it, I promise I'll let you know."

Patton stares so hard at their joined hands that Thomas wonders if he can hear him. They haven't held hands since that day Patton cried. Haven't touched either. Thomas suspects...no, he knows it's a sore subject. He knows with Patton, and most of the others, maybe all of them? They've lacked human touch for so long that they don't know what to do with themselves whenever they receive it. They must crave it. Hell, Janus was brought to tears because Thomas touched his face.

It's another process though, another adjustment. It's a lot of responsibility placed on Thomas for these people he's just starting to know. He likes them, he does. He's caught off guard sometimes by how much he enjoys their company, the sparks they bring to his life as he learns more about them. It's not a bad thing by any means.

Thomas holds Patton's hand and hopes this is a good step. He caresses the top of Patton's hand with a thumb, and Patton's eyes flick, watching the movement.

"You're the priority though," Patton says softly, at a loss.

Thomas's heart breaks for them.

He leads Patton by the hand back to the couch. They sit together and Thomas gently nudges the remote into Patton's hand that he isn't holding.

"Sometimes, maybe. But right now? It's your time. What do you want to watch?"

With a subdued joy that Thomas hopes one day will have all the strength of a hurricane, Patton clicks through the apps and turns on 'Steven Universe'. Thomas sticks with him to watch. He's already seen it, but he'll watch it again any day. Plus, he doesn't want to take his hand away when Patton clutches so tightly.

They progress in paces of patience. Soon, Thomas will need to jump fully back into work now that he's recovered from his sickness. He's texted his team and he'll be meeting with them tomorrow.

The big question is, will his new roommates be able to interact with them?

"We should engage in preliminary testing," Logan suggests.

Roman cheers, "I concur! Why wait for tomorrow what you could do today?"

"Famous last words," Virgil quips.

"Then what do you suggest, Negative Nancy?"

"Why even try? If you never try, then you can never fail. If you never fail, then you won't be disappointed."

"Technically, he's not wrong," Logan admits.

"You're agreeing with him?!"

"I didn't say that. I am no defeatist. I don't fear failure. Indeed, I feel no sense of fear whatsoever."

"God I wish that were me," Thomas bemoans his introverted existence.

"How about I streak naked down the street?" Remus suggests. "That'll get some looks!"

Logan is not the only one who doesn't possess a sense of fear, apparently.

There's enough interest amongst the group to go forward with the testing today. Patton thanks Remus for his contribution but tries to let him down gently and say maybe another time. Roman supplies fanciful ideas of vigilante fighting. Even if bad guys can't see them, they can pretend Thomas has telekinesis powers and make him look cool by floating things at the enemy. Patton also thanks Roman for his contributions but tries to let him down gently as well.

"How about shopping?" Janus says. "I'm always a hoe for a shopping spree. Especially when it's someone else's money that's being spent."

"Thomas isn't some cash cow," Virgil reminds him with narrowed eyes.

"No, don't be silly, he's a cash man."

Before they can get into it, Thomas chimes in, "Sure, I can spare a bit. Where would you guys like to go?"

Predictably, Remus says a sex shop. For the first time, Thomas can kinda see how long-term exposure might render the others a little dismissive towards him. But it is a valid option! Thomas is a grown man, with grown man needs. He's just...not gonna be going to an adult store with people he just became friends with. That's like, level fifty in terms of friendship.

"How about a grocery store?" Logan says. "It would be a practical way to spend your money."

"That's his way of saying he wants more Crofters jam," Virgil translates. Logan doesn't spare him a glance and simply mutters, "Falsehood."

Thomas feels in a teasing mood, so he asks Virgil, "And what about you?"

"Me?" Virgil lifts a singular eyebrow. It's a thinner brow than Thomas's, as if he shapes them. Thomas can imagine him easily with an eyebrow piercing. It'd go great with his aesthetic.

Why is he thinking so much about Virgil's eyebrows?

Thomas inwardly shakes himself and plasters a smirk on his face. "Yeah, you. Do you want some more ice cream?"

Virgil gives a mixture of a scoff and a cough. He shoves his hands in his pockets. "Spend your money however you want, Sanders."

"And that's Virgil's way of saying yes, he would love more ice cream," Janus translates.

Patton raises a hand. "Can we get more peanut butter?"

"And pickles?" Remus asks.

"Oh, how about pizza!" Roman says.

"Sure, anything you guys want," Thomas smiles, unable to hold himself back from wanting to indulge them.

Thomas hops in his car and drives to his local Walmart. Logan rides shotgun while Roman, Remus, and Patton squish together in the backseat. It's a twelve-minute ride that the three backseat passengers insist must be enjoyed with all the enthusiasm of an eight-hour road trip. They play car games to pass the time, and Thomas plays the radio for background noise. Logan points out a traffic light in disrepair before Thomas notices and reminds him to treat the intersection as a four-way stop.

They reach Walmart and it's not as dreadfully busy as it could be, but it's still Walmart. Thomas exits the car and trudges up to the store like a man going to war.

It takes him a bit to realize that the others have suddenly gone missing. Surrounded by strangers after spending over a week at home is a bit of a slap to the senses. Thomas is more troubled with securing a shopping cart and avoiding bumping into anyone. He surveys the store and debates where to start before heading towards the very back of the grocery section, intending to work his way up.

By the time he's grabbing a pack of butter, Thomas notices the immediate quiet. There's a chill that's not coming from the cooler beside him. He cranes his neck around to look over the buzzing masses. People pass this way and that. A lady with five kids getting milk. An old man perusing the discount baked goods rack. A couple heading towards the deli counter. More and more inconsequential bodies flit across his vision. And in the middle of the aisle, as if the rest of the world falls away and his eyes are drawn to him, there stands Virgil.

He stands alone, the brightness of his purple patches standing out amongst the crowd. Calmly, he watches people pass by him. No one looks his way, not even once. A teenager passes right through him on her way to catch up with her parents. Virgil's lips twitch up and he turns to meet Thomas's gaze.

Thomas is held captive in the moment. Virgil looks at him, and there's no guessing what's on his mind. Thomas knows. He knows it in his heart.

Virgil shrugs helplessly. They gave it a shot. This changes nothing. He'll tell himself he doesn't want to be perceived anyway while ignoring that little piece inside that pleads otherwise. That piece that's been waiting for so long for someone to just look and notice and not act like he isn't there, like he doesn't exist.

It's a lonely thing to watch the world go by and be told that you can't partake.

As much as it hurts, it's okay, because Thomas at least sees him for who he is. It's enough.

Yet again, Thomas thinks they deserve so much more.

***

The ride back to his apartment is significantly less noisy. Thomas catches glimpses of Virgil and Janus in the rearview mirror sitting in the backseat, neither talking, both looking out their respective windows. They disappear once Thomas parks the car, and Patton and Logan join him while he empties the trunk of its groceries. They're also far too quiet for comfort as they help carry bags inside.

The next day rolls by, Thomas meets with his team, and Roman lingers in the background, an unseen guest. Thomas can see his wistful smile as he watches Thomas interact with his friends. There's longing there to be included. When no one's looking, Thomas offers him a wave. It's enough of an acknowledgement that Roman perks up and swings his feet a bit where he sits on a table.

The meeting goes well. They've brainstormed some future video ideas and have a shooting schedule mapped out. Best of all, no one looks at Thomas like he's a walking hazard. They seem to be relieved that he's recovered and well rested and more responsive than he's been in a long time. Thomas returns home afterwards, and life goes on.

There's not much in the way of testing discussed after that, for a while at least. The previous lack of success is disheartening, and really though, what else is there to test? They are real people to Thomas only.

And Thomas would be a liar if he doesn't admit that he occasionally speculates if this makes him clinically insane. As real as they are to him, no one else can see or interact with them. Doesn't that check the boxes on a lot of psych evaluation tests?

If it's a form of insanity, it's a relatively mild one in terms of negative impact. It could be a lot worse. He's sure Logan could grant him some neat facts to put it all in perspective. That would involve telling Logan about his concerns revolving whether they are real or not. He doesn't want him to think he's invalidating his existence.

Isn't he though? By just questioning this, isn't there a part of his mind that still can't wrap around this? What more can he do to prove to himself that they truly exist?

Without conversing to the others about it, Thomas discreetly slips out his phone and snaps a picture of Remus. He's just sitting on the living room floor, swaying back and forth absent-mindedly. You can see the corner of the entertainment center in the picture. It's not a remarkable picture by any means and doesn't have the best lighting, but Remus brings a sense of peculiarity with his dark prince outfit.

The picture is taken with none the wiser. Thomas purses his lips and stares at his phone screen. He taps his fingers on the back of the case.

Remus's figure never fades. It's definitely a picture of him. Now what does he do with it?

He can send it to someone. Just to see if they can see an image of the others. If not in person, maybe they can be viewed through technological means? But who should he send it to? Not his brothers. Or his parents. Hmm, he can't think of a friend he can send it to without garnering a series of questions for an explanation. Well, he can possibly play it off. But what if he can't?

He scrolls through his contact list before spying his godson's name. Gavin sends him random stuff all the time. Thomas can just tell him it's a meme trend or something.

Trying not to overthink it, Thomas sends the pic along with a question, What do you see in this picture?

A few very nail-biting minutes later, Gavin responds. Is that ur house?

That isn't...the worst response.

Yeah lol

Ur tv cord? Idk is something I'm missing?

Yeah, the invisible man. You can't see him?

Nah, he invisible.

Darn, I told him to turn off that setting before I took the pic. Maybe next time.

Gavin sends back a laughing emoji.

That settles that. If Gavin could see Remus, he would have said something about his outfit or ask who he is or why he's at Thomas's apartment. The kid asks a lot of questions, and to be fair, Remus is very questionable in general.

Thomas doesn't let the others know of his discovery. What they don't know can't hurt them, right?

It turns out to be truer than Thomas can imagine. Curiosity killed the cat. Ignorance is bliss. Be careful what you wish for.

While no one has spoken of the discoveries from the Walmart outing, it doesn't mean it hasn't been on their minds. In fact, Logan in particular has taken notes to record the aspects of their existence. He approaches Thomas and shows him some of his theories and hypothesis.

"I would like to attempt a new test, if you would be so inclined," Logan says, and while he holds his posture well, Thomas senses an underlying nervousness to him.

Thomas doesn't want to deny him this, not when they've struggled with learning how to reach out to him.

"What do you have in mind?" Thomas asks.

They relocate to the backyard. Everyone else joins them. They probably would have anyway, but Logan specifically requests that everyone convene together.

"Are we finally running into oncoming traffic?" Remus asks excitedly, bouncing on his heels.

"Not today, Remus. I have devised an experiment to test the boundaries of our physical attachment to Thomas. Prior to Thomas's illness, we could not stray beyond roughly eighty feet from Thomas. When arriving to this distance, we experience a tethering sensation, as if we cannot walk any further. With the increase to our corporeal prowess, I suggest we ascertain whether this distance remains or if it has increased."

"So you just want us to go for a walk?" Patton asks.

"Oh, why didn't you just say that, Isaac Nerdton?" Roman scoffs.

Logan adjusts his glasses. "Because I wanted all parties to know precisely what– okay, fine. We are going for a walk. But!" He claps his hands to accentuate his point. "This will be regulated so that we can account for all variables. I suggest we test one subject at a time to calculate if there are any differences between distance amongst us."

Thomas raises his hand and waits for Logan to call on him. "So what do I do?"

"You just stand there."

"Cool, I can do that. I'm good at standing."

"Who's gonna go first?" Virgil asks. He shifts his gaze between everyone to see if someone will volunteer.

Patton shrugs. "I could, I guess?"

"What would this prove anyway?" Janus comments, snide in the way he checks his nails through his glove. It would be a funny image if he didn't sound genuinely dismissive of the whole affair. "This won't change anything. Even if we miraculously can wander off to new horizons, Thomas is still the only person who can see us."

"We could break into people's houses and steal their stuff," Remus says.

"Let's not take other people's things," Patton says. "We wouldn't want people to come steal from Thomas, would we? It's not right."

"Morality only matters to those who have a place in society. Last I checked, we don't."

Patton deflates and looks at Janus with a pained expression. "I think it still matters how you treat people..."

"Good for you," Janus says, sickly sweet.

Virgil steps between the two of them. "Okay, what crawled in your ass and died?"

"Cynicism? Disillusionment? A reality check? Take your pick."

Virgil growls and looks at Logan. "You know what? I'll go."

"Wait, wait, let's not start things off angry," Thomas urges. Virgil has begun walking, so Thomas skitters up behind him, grasping on to his jacket. Virgil halts but doesn't turn around.

"This is merely for educational purposes. I did not expect this to warrant a strong emotional reaction."

Roman claps a hand on Logan's shoulder. "Not your fault, Specs. Someone must have pissed in Janus's cheerios this morning."

Janus crosses his arms and puts on an unaffected tone, "Do whatever you wish. Don't let me stop you."

Thomas shares a look with Logan. "I'd like to go through with the test because it's important to Logan. Whether what we discover is any different than what you guys are used to, it doesn't matter. What matters is that it's important to Logan to find out."

There's a brief softening of the eyes behind Logan's glasses. He shuffles quickly with his notebook and pen and then unceremoniously dumps them into Roman's arms.

Roman sputters, "What–?"

"I'll do it," Logan announces. "After all, this is my hypothesis. I will take the initiative and be the first to go."

Logan gestures for Thomas to step aside to the "starting point". Thomas lets go of Virgil hesitantly, but Virgil doesn't protest or turn to look. Thomas shuffles over to the side in the grass and holds still while Logan stands beside him.

"I will count my steps as I go along to measure the distance. Once I reach a point I can no longer move forward, I'll return."

"Okay, easy peasy," Thomas says with false cheer.

Janus doesn't debate any more. Patton offers no assurances. Remus doesn't interrupt. Roman holds the notebook stiffly. And Virgil's head only moves as Logan walks by him. He watches as Logan treks across the grass behind the apartment complex.

Logan keeps his head bowed, watching his steps with careful attentiveness. He crosses the road and carries on through more grass. He rapidly approaches the tree line that begins there on the other side.

"Anyone wanna make bets?" Remus asks. The suggestion falls on deaf ears, but Patton does come over to stand beside him and hold his hand. It must not be a frequent occurrence because Remus glances down at him in surprise but doesn't discourage it.

For Thomas's part, his eyes are glued to Logan's back. His form is getting smaller, more distant.

"That's more than eighty feet," Virgil murmurs, loud in the quiet. His hand scratches at his neck, and when that doesn't seem to do anything for him, he shakes out his hands. Then he shakes out his hands again.

Roman turns to gauge Virgil. He frowns at what he sees, though Thomas can't see Virgil's face from this angle. "You good, Virge?"

"I don't like this," Virgil admits. His foot begins tapping a mad dance into the ground.

"I don't either," Patton drones, morose. Perhaps he's sensitive from Janus's remarks.

Logan treads into the woods. They can see his black polo and blue jeans through the spindly tree trunks. At first, he's there, but quickly he's swallowed into the vegetation.

Virgil runs his fingers through his hair and blows out a stream of air. "What if he gets lost?"

Roman laughs, "Get lost? He's going in a straight line, Virge."

"What if something happens to him? What if– what if– I don't like this."

"I thought you were on board with this."

Virgil doesn't answer. He starts pacing back and forth, and Thomas can see his expression now in his peripheral. His brows are knotted, eyes too wide. His pacing becomes erratic.

"Hey, hey, don't do that. You're just gonna work yourself up," Roman calls to him, coming over to stop him. Virgil tries to walk around him, but Roman blocks his path.

"Why didn't one of us go with him? We should have gone with him!"

"Virgil, please, it'll be alright. Pat, may I have an emergency dose of positivity over here?"

"I don't like this," Patton repeats, and his tone is even more dejected. He holds onto Remus's arm with both hands. He leans into him, shaking at the arm insistently. "I don't like this."

"...Patton?" Remus hums in confusion. He looks around to the others to see if they're witnessing how close to crying Patton seems, but Thomas's eyes can't leave the tree line where Logan vanished.

"We have to go get him. Please, we have to–"

"Stormcloud, please," Roman soothes, and Virgil clings to the front of his tunic like a drowning man. His breaths are coming shorter and shorter, his words jumbling amongst the gasps. Roman stands there, dumbfounded. "Uh, Remus?"

"Kinda busy with Pat," Remus says, watching as Patton unravels. Tears cascade down his face and the first whimper of a sob comes out. "Okay, what the fuck is going on?"

"He's gonna die, he's gonna die-" Virgil rants over and over and he launches into a full-blown panic attack. "Janus, Janus, help!"

"Please!" Patton wails and falls to his knees. Remus barely manages to catch him and guide him down safely.

Thomas's feet move without intention. He takes one heavy step, then another, movements sluggish and wooden.

Janus is there suddenly, hand at his elbow to stop his forward momentum. Thomas is barely conscious of the peering eyes, one human and one snake. Janus glances between a hysterical Virgil and a sobbing Patton and turns to Thomas.

"Thomas, can you hear me?" he asks.

Thomas can, but it's like he's under water. He tries to step forward again, but Janus won't let him. Thomas feels the resistance as if steel cables are latching onto him with grappling hooks. Serrated edges sink into his flesh. No, no, it's not from outside. It's inside. There's a pull inside him, and it tugs.

"Janus!" Virgil begs.

"Please!" Patton cries.

"What the hell is wrong with them?!"

"I don't know! It's not like this has ever happened before!"

"Janus, what is Thomas doing?"

The words drift over Thomas, like seafoam floating by in a vast sea. There are more important matters to attend, like how he can't see Logan. If Logan is gone, then that means–

"Thomas, listen to me," someone says, and there are hands cupping his face. Thomas can't feel them, yet he knows they're there. "You have to shut this down. You have to stop this. Now."

But Logan is gone. He's gone, and Thomas is left bereft without him. The earth beneath his feet tremors, and the sky splits open in a downpour. The sun will fall and set the world ablaze. And Thomas feels the ache building up in his chest with mind-numbing certainty.

"Thomas!" the voice yells at him, hands shaking him. Thomas looks up into a face that he knows. He knows that face. He knows, he knows, he knows. How could he not? That's why it's so familiar. Why couldn't he see it before?

"I'm sorry," Thomas whispers.

His chest splinters in agony. Fear bleeds out abundant. Grief ravages his heart.

Thomas falls to the ground screaming.

[proveimalive]

Whoops! I'm ruining my own life

First time using this account in... 8 years? Maybe more, I don't know. So here's where we're at- I graduated university two years ago. Ended up working a job at a hotel that was a fucking nightmare. Ended up in the hospital due to substance abuse. Have since gotten a handle on said abuse. Am now in therapy, take ADHD meds. Have problems sleeping.

Got a job at the THeatre Royal. Been working there (and at the Dome) for 1.5 years now. Time flies. Made new friends, reignited my love for performance.

Got accepted to the London Film academy for an MA in screenwriting. Thought I could use that creative writing degree for something more substancial. It's £16,000. Can't afford it with what I'm earning.

Desperate to move out of my house. Can't spend anothert year stuck here, in this house, at this job, in the city. Need a fresh start. Need to earn more for that fresh start. Need to make a decision on what MA I'm going to do.

I miss studying, but I don't want to stay in Brighton. I want to be away and out, in London, in the centre of it all. Don't care if it's a shit hole. Just want somewhere to stay while I figure my life out.

Have a list of things I want to try, and limited time to try it. Thinking and thinking and thinking about what I want to do with my life is getting me nowhere. It's been revealed to me that I am not the sort of person who knows my own mind as well as I thought. I think I want something, and then I try it and the reality is completely different. I know that doing an MA is going to be much more work than I think. And what I learned from my degree- unless I really, really care about something, I have no hope in hell of achieving it. I need to want this or it won't work.

On a comedy kick at the moment, so want to try out some improv. Maybe some comedy writing. Think that could be fun and is something I like.

Want to try acting again. Doing an actual production. Think that could be fun.

I'm less anxious now, much healthier. I'm in a better place to do these things.

Screenwriting doesn't excite me that much. It sounds interesting, and cool, if it was a module I'd enjoy it. I think about uni and the things that stuck with me are these- writing a TV show with friends, and our comedy module. Both were more fun then I ever would have thought. I loved it, and it made me happy. Shame pandemic fucked us all over. Oh well.

Maybe look into comedy writing MAs, or just comedy writing courses.

I have enough to justify the expense. I'm tired of sitting here doing nothing day after day. I live and breathe and eat and do research, think, work, sleep. But I want to create. I want to throw myself into it and produce something. I think for years I thought I needed to fill a void. And I do. But external things don't work as well as creating something myself does.

Comedy, comedy, comedy. Wiritng. Acting. Producing. Directing. Productions. Running TV shows? I don't know.

Fuck. I wish I could make up my mind. I wish the answer could come to me in a huge rush and I'd go, "bingo. That. That's what I want to do with my life".

And of course, there's always the dream of living and working on a boat for a year. Which is becoming increasingly appealing.

All the "dreams" I have are just that- dreams. Because the reality is never what you think it'll be. Sometimes it is. Sometimes it's just a waste of time. Sometimes it's dissapointing. Sometimes it IS what you thought it would be, but then are hit with the reality that it's not making you as happy as you hoped.

Fuck me. I feel like I'm running out of time. I'm only 23, but it feels like the clock is ticking somehow. Like if I don't make a choice in the next few months, that's it. I'm stuck for another year, walking in circles, running on the spot.

I want to pick a destination and just drive full speed towards it. But instead I'm just parked on the side of the road, watching all the other cars go by, jealous of some. Staring at this map in my hands that's just a fain quiggle of lines and feeling confused and empty.

What's stopping me from setting off. I'm afraid that if I don't pick the "right" destination, I'll end up driving aimlessly from place to place, hating every single one. Even if I do enjoy my time there, if it's not "right", then I'm wasting my time. I'm wasting my life.

You might think well, how can you be? As long as you're enjoying it, then it's not wasted. That's what life is, right? Doing what makes you happiest day by day, and everything else is just a bonus.

The problem is that on a day to day basis, I'm not that happy. Life doesn't make me that happy. It makes me stressed and tired and bored and empty, and I've tried to fill that emptiness as best I can. Running from the feeling of existential dread that won't leave me be. Trying to fill the void with whatever distraction I can. To take away from the fact that I feel I am tethred to the earth by a fraying piece of rope, and I just want to come back down to land. But there's a part of me that just wants to let go and float away. Can't do that.

I feel like an astronaut fighting to keep in contact with planet earth. Sending through garbled messages and squinting through my helmet, trying to focus on what's happening down below. Like if I can stare hard enough, watch for long enough, it's almost like I'm there.

I know that I'm here. I just don't always feel like I am. I feel panicked, like any second something bad will happen. Any second it will all collapse and the tenuous balance or peace I've found will vanish. It's all very existential and over dramatic but I'm nothing if not both of those things.

So where to start? Do what I do best, I guess. figure it out on the fly.

I think doing a trial run at Mark and Chris's house would be good too. Get some experience living alone again. I think that might be a good test to see how I'm doing. If it goes poorly, I can always bring it up in therapy.

It's a sickness, a panic that seeps up from my stomach. Like the whole world has forgotten about me. Out, of sight, out of mind. Like I stop existing if I'm not being perceived. Maybe that's why I like the idea of being in a group so much. They have no choice. They're bound to me. I exist.

I exist.

Because I feel I have no worth unless I have worth to others. Is that the void I'm trying to fill? I can't be happy unless I'm kaing other people happy? Fuck me. that's a lonely, tiring life.

But I feel empty and vacant. Trying to be human as best I can.

I know all is not lost. I know these thoughts are obsessions born from an insecure childhood and that there is so much more out there. I just know I need to move. I'm a deer caught in the headlights, watching, waiting, and if I don't move I'm going to get hit. I'm a frog in a pan of water, and I'm going to drown or be boiled alive. I need to move. There's no other option.

The only thing I can control is which direction I jump. So really, does it matter? If nothing matters and it could all fall apart, who gives a shit. Who really cares. I have to jump or I'll die, so just pick something and GO. If it doesn't work out at least I moved.

Deep dramatic sigh. Breathe.

I can do this. It won't be easy but I can do it. Whatever I choose, it will be equal parts right and wrong. Some more boring or disastrous than others but each a chapter for this very long dull book. I just want to make sure there are enough highlights for a good memoir at the end, and I won't get that from doing what I'm doing now.

Got a grip on the alcoholism. Sorted the anxiety out. Got new friends. Lost a tonne of weight. Blood pressure and heart health is good. Got back in reading and writing.

Now I just need to do a but of actual living and I'll be on a roll.

So I should end this one here. Because that's enough typing and thinking for one day. You can only do what you can do. I just want to make sure that in the end, i do right by me. Little me deserves that at least.

Time to go take a shower, watch taskmaster, reply to my 7 friends and go for a speed walk in the dark listening to a spooky podcast. Can't beat the high life.

28/01/2024

[erismerald]

𝑰 𝒃𝒆𝒍𝒐𝒏𝒈 𝒊𝒏 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒑𝒂𝒔𝒕 (Jacob Frye x reader) 𝑪𝒉𝒂𝒑𝒕𝒆𝒓 2

Hello creed, I bring you here the second chapter of my Jacob Frye fanfic, I hope you like it and maybe I would like to remind you that my requests are always open in case someone is interested!

Without further ado, stay safe, and happy reading!

𝑪𝒉𝒂𝒑𝒕𝒆𝒓 1

𝑾𝒂𝒓𝒏𝒊𝒏𝒈𝒔: Fluff and a bit of teasing ;)

𝑾𝒐𝒓𝒅 𝒄𝒐𝒖𝒏𝒕: 3953

𝐋𝐨𝐧𝐝𝐨𝐧 𝟏𝟖𝟔𝟖

Your head hurt a little, and your vision was blurred, you felt moving but you were still, you looked around, the environment you were in was different from the wet and scary street, with a little more effort, you tried to look for details that would help you identify where you were, you were on a train. ... but how? the room you were in was well decorated, you knew that style well, your nanny was doing her best to decorate every part of the house with the rustic and elegant theme of the Victorian era, so none of that had been a dream?

You sat up in bed, feeling your body weakened, you took a deep breath and gained strength to pull yourself together, the clothes you were wearing were different, it was a nightgown, made of cotton, all black with gold details on the sleeves, after all you had really traveled in time. ... but how was that possible, one moment you were with your friends and the next you were alone in the world, flash all the memories of last night had burst into your mind, the dark street, the rain... the man who tried to abuse you, and your savior, who was he? was it him that brought you here? doubts hovered empty in your consciousness, you looked at your wrists small black marks tinged your skin, you felt pain when the palm of your fingers ventured to touch them, without realizing it you let out a 'auch', you couldn't control the fear you felt, you were alone. You wanted your grandmother by your side to calm you down, you grabbed your knees and pulled them up to your chest, and laid your head down lightly letting the tears run down your face, feeling them fall on your hands, you felt small, you felt abandoned.

Suddenly the bedroom door opened revealing a woman, still quite young she must have been in her early twenties, she smiled sweetly at you, no matter how hard you tried to hide under the blanket, that smile warmed your heart and made you smile back.

"I see you're awake at last" She approached with a tray of food that she set down on top of the couch where you were lying "My name is-" she was interrupted by a man, you recognized him, he had been the one to save you, your heart pounded hard when your gaze met.

"Ahhh finally, I'll be able to sleep in my room again" he laughed sitting down in the armchair opposite you, you bowed your head in shame

"Jacob! The girl just woke up, and you're already being a real jerk, I can't believe you're my brother sometimes" The girl said turning her attention back to you " Dear ignore him, he's just a jerk, how do you feel?"

"I... I'm confused just... I feel sick and hot" your voice came out shaky, you were nervous.

"It's because of the fever the doctor said you would feel like this for a few days, but that you would be fine, what's your name?" The girl asked meekly, sitting down in front of you, your gaze shifted a little to the man sitting in front of you, he seemed asleep.

"M-my name is Y/n L/n" again your voice betrayed you, as you said your name the girl looked shocked but interested in you.

"Your family is a great help to our brotherhood, it is an honor to have you here with us!" The girl said with a gentle smile kissing her lips, a feeling of hope embraced your body, would there still be a way back home? But in a flash, you recalled what she had said.

"M-my family? how do you know them?" you asked pulling your body forward-facing the two people sitting in front of you.

"The L/N family has always been a great help in training young assassins" Assassins? What? you didn't want to believe what you heard, all the memories were joining the truth about your family, the story your grandmother told you and you preferred not to believe was really true? It wasn't possible, but why now? why now that you had decided to find out who you were? Why now that you have finally traveled to London? And who were the people in front of you? The girl stood up and stretched her hand towards you "My name is Evie Frye, and that idiot over there is my twin brother Jacob Frye" the words that came out of her lips were like glass tearing your mind, you felt dizzy as if you couldn't breathe right, was all that true? Wasn't it possible? Was it? But how did you end up in their time? Was your grandmother right, weren't they just children's stories?

"How is it possible?" you whispered, both brothers looked at you curiously, " No, it can't be real, I must be dreaming... "Your gaze was fixed on your hands resting on the thin cloth that covered your body, crystal clear tears came out of your eyes, Evie seeing your reaction to finding out who they were hugged your body and pulled you in, you hid your face to her shoulder, letting the sadness leave your heart.

A few minutes passed, but it seemed like hours, your body was still weak from crying, in 18 years of life you had never cried so much, you took a deep breath, hugging Evie's body tightly.

"I know very well who you are" you finally said, Evie knelt down beside the sofa looking puzzled at you.

"How do you know us, love?" Jacob said getting up from the armchair and staring at you, he was much taller than you, and you felt a little embarrassed to feel his gaze fixed on yours, in one small movement you looked away from Evie, you took a deep breath and gathered your courage to expose your whole story.

"My name is Y/n L/n but I am not from here... in fact until a few minutes ago I believed that you two were part of the stories my grandmother used to tell me when I was younger... "I know well who my family is, I just didn't know their true position in this brotherhood, my grandmother used to tell me stories of the Frye twins and the adventures of the assassins to free London from the grasp of the Templars, but I always believed that you were a lie, I am not from here, nor from this time and I honestly don't know how I got here," you said between sobs, raising one of your hands to your face wiping the tears that were falling "I don't even know why I came here, for one second I was in 2020 and the next I traveled back in time to here. .. BUT I DON'T KNOW WHY! I WAS JUST TRYING TO FIND OUT WHO I WAS, WHY DID I HAVE TO VISIT LONDON AND IGNORE ALL THE WARNINGS MY GRANDMOTHER GAVE ME? WHY DID SHE LET ME COME? DID SHE KNOW THIS WAS GOING TO HAPPEN?" Your crying turned into anger, you felt like your body was going to collapse, you felt dizzy, everything was becoming blurry but something broke your fall and held you tight, with the tremendous effort you looked up to see what had happened, the next thing you knew you were in Jacob's arms, he protected you from falling or passing out, you wanted to talk but all you could say was 'ahh' or 'I...'.

"Okay love I know it's a lot to process but you're not alone here, you have us now, we'll take care of you," Jacob said stroking your hair and holding you close to his body, the beating of his heart helped you calm down. "Now what do you mean 2020? We can tell you're not from here but did this happen? Evie?" Jacob called his sister's name they both looked at each other, and after a few seconds, Evie had an idea.

"Let's wait for you to recover so you can tell us everything straight so we can understand what's going on, but..." Evie stopped sighing "Until you can get back home we have to make you unnoticed, we have to make you mix with the people of our time, only then you will be safe, and since your family is a big influence here in London we can visit them and try to ask for help, what do you think?" Evie smiled at you and you smiled back, you felt your eyes grow tired, and without much effort, you fell asleep.

Your eyes opened slowly, it was hard to sleep with the storm of thoughts that rambled through your mind, occupying every neuron, it was still night, you looked at the clock on the desk, it was 4 am, still so early and you were already so awake, you couldn't deny that you felt anxious and nervous with what was happening, Your body moved from side to side on the sofa where you slept, the rain hit the glass loudly, the sound of the wheels on the rails, the wind whistled lulling your body, but you couldn't sleep anymore, the stress, the fear, the frustration of not being home, it was agonizing, you stared at the ceiling, thinking, those memories were still very fresh in your mind, it would take a while to accept.

With a little effort you pushed your body up, sitting down and crossing your legs, the window above your head was splashed with raindrops that slid with speed, the landscape was beautiful, the city lights in the background made your heart beat faster, Even in another epoch London was still London, still a beautiful, attractive city, without you realizing it, a weak smile broke out on your lips, it was ironic that you wanted to visit a place so much and when you did it was as if it vanished through your fingers.

You observed the room and noticed your bag lying on the side of the sofa, with one hand you pulled yourself towards you and took out your drawing notebook, you appreciated the picture sticked on the leather cover, it was your grandfather who had made it, he made a dozen of them just for you, every time the pages of one finished, another one came on the scene, with canvas for more adventures and emotions, since you were very young that writing and drawing were a way to represent your emotions and represent the world you lived in.

With a few gestures you let your hand flow across the white page, drawing and sketching empty emotions but full of comfort, looking on the bright side, when you return you will always have something to show your grandmother, a memory, the sound of the pencil scratching the sheet of paper, soothed your heart so full of bitterness, 'so this is what it's like to discover who I am? Is this what you wanted me to see grandma?' you thought to yourself, is this the destiny that was destined for you?

You sighed and let your hand fall on your thigh, you looked forward, and saw Jacob's coat resting on the back of the armchair in front of you, a wave of warmth and embarrassment invaded your chest, you felt strange every time you thought about him, he was mysterious but gentle and protective, when you felt his body wrap around yours it seemed that they had connected to each other, and all the negative energies and scary thoughts disappeared, your heartbeat as he did, your breath calmed down as you felt his fingers tangle in your hair to comfort you, without a second thought, you began to draw his face on that once white page, you remembered every detail of his face, the two scars, his unshaven beard, his hazel eyes, his lips. ... he was an attractive man, you would never in your life think of meeting him, but now that you know him, he was something you didn't want to forget, you put the notebook against your chest and smiled like a little child, feeling butterflies playing with your belly.

But something interrupted the moment, that moment when you were no longer present on earth, you were lost, hidden in a world of thoughts:

" Rough night?" A voice coming from behind you, scared every inch of your body, you put your hand on your chest letting the notebook fall to the floor, you recognized the owner behind that hoarse and funny voice, Jacob laughed a little "I didn't want to scare you, love, I just came to check if you were okay and since I saw you were awake I decided to come in" Jacob said sitting next to you, his gaze crossed with yours. "How are you feeling?"

"I-im okay, and don't worry you didn't scare me, I was just lost in my thoughts and didn't even see you coming...." you replied shakily, like a leaf in the middle of a storm, his smile was directed at you, you could feel your face getting warm, it was obvious you were nervous, but why?

Jacob sat in the armchair in front of you, he looked tired, but more importantly, he was completely flushed, your gaze was fixed on his body, his hair was dripping, his breathing was racing, your heart was beating unregulated as if you were in a sprint, your breathing became heavy for a few moments.

"Do you like what you see love?" Jacob teased, bending his body forward, you jumped a little when hearing his voice, and quickly looked the other way, the rain was still beating strongly on the window, but the train had stopped, maybe because of the bad weather? "I was just messing with you, I just came from a mission, and well... since you are sleeping in my room and my stuff is here, I came straight to you." He laughed a little, his laugh was wonderful.

Even not looking directly at him you could feel his smile, unbelievably you were feeling calm again, your breathing was quiet, but you felt Jacob's gaze on your body, something captivated him about you, but he still couldn't know what it was, maybe because you were exotic? Because you were new to him, his gaze was fixed on your neck, the necklace that belonged to him was now adorning your neck.

"I wanted to thank you, Mister Frye, thank you for saving me from that... you know, I wanted to thank you earlier but, I've been busy with my mind-" Suddenly you felt his fingers slip up your neck to your jawline turning your face to face his, his curious gaze was focused on the necklace, he smiled.

"How funny I have a necklace just like that hanging around my neck, matching aren't we" Again his laughter filled the room, you couldn't contain yourself, and a small giggle broke out from your lips "Oh you do laugh too, you have a very adorable laugh" Your face flared, a pink color graced your cheeks as you heard his voice, he was so close. ... his scent intoxicated you, as if you were drunk on his scent alone, you felt your eyes getting heavier, but something woke you up, a fallen drop of Jacob's hair fell on your cheek.

"Shouldn't you take off your wet clothes, or at least dry yourself? Mister Frye you might catch a cold" the words escaped from your lips, the concern was explicit on your face, Jacob found it adorable, but he laughed a little, confused you looked at him pouting, you were just trying to help and he still laughed.

"Darling, my clothes are all here and if you haven't noticed, you're here, it would be inappropriate to undress in front of such a delicate lady, besides I'm used to it, after missions I usually go to some pub to celebrate with my rooks but Evie asked me to keep an eye on you, and I didn't want to leave you alone either," Jacob said sitting back in the chair.

You blushed but nodded, he was right, it wouldn't be appropriate, but something wandered in your mind, he didn't want to leave you alone? Jacob's watchful eyes noticed your notebook lying on the floor, he reached out to pick it up, you felt a wave of embarrassment and shame hit you like a stone, no, a bunch of them.

His fingers slid across the pages looking at the drawings, especially the one you had done the day you arrived in London, he looked like a child watching a cartoon on TV, he was mesmerized.

"Ahm Mister Frye, may I ask you something?" you asked as he looked at your notebook, he nodded without saying a word. "What was this mission you went on?" his gaze was still focused on the drawings, but he took a deep breath and answered finally.

"Y/n you know what an Assassin does right?" He asked, you nodded, waiting for his answer to continue "I was assigned to kill templars and free London from the disgusting and profiteering clutches of theme, today I helped rescue some of my rooks who were taken hostage in the middle of one of their rounds when they warned me,

I ran immediately to save them, they are like a family

family, and I as their leader have to help and protect them.

His words were like melodies, he sounded just like the way your vein described, ruthless, brave, gentle and playful, fearless, you smiled, was it possible for a man like that to be true? Was it even possible that your childhood hero was right there in front of you watching your drawings? Was it really true that after many years of hearing about him, you were having a conversation with him? You felt so confident that for a few minutes you forgot that you were stuck in 1800.

"You are really brave Jacob..." Finally, you said, slowly removing the necklace from your neck and holding it between your fingers, circling it from side to side. "You know I spent years adoring you... wanting to be like you and Evie, my grandmother spent years telling me about your adventures, I remember when I was younger and climbing up on the roof, jumping from window to window pretending to be you, pretending to be with you, and well. ... years later here I am in front of you, talking to my idol, and I still don't know how to react to this situation" You laughed a little sarcastically. You were nervous but you knew you could trust him, when you looked ahead again his gaze went through every detail of the drawing you had made of him, he seemed excited.

"I thank you Y/n, for idolizing me when you were younger, it must come as a shock to you, finally meeting me hum?" He said with a tinny smirk on his lips.

"W-well it is but I think you can even exceed my expectations Mister Frye" You laughed nervously, you tried to avoid looking at him, you were afraid you wouldn't know how to react.

"How do you feel about your family belonging to the brotherhood?" He questioned you as he put your notebook down on the desk next to him, you sighed, honestly you didn't even know what to say, or what to think about it, of course, you knew for many years that your family came from a long line of assassins but, you preferred to believe that it was a lie or just another story invented by your grandmother to entertain your creative mind during the most starry nights, you never imagined that they were real, and you still thought that taking someone's life for the sake of a brotherhood or to protect others was wrong, and you didn't want to be associated with that, so you forgot that story, and went on with your life, but now that you knew that they were real, you were a little afraid to confront them.

"I... honestly I don't know how to answer you, when I was younger, I heard the stories told by my grandmother over and over again, but I never thought that they were real, and even when she talked about the brotherhood I... preferred to ignore it, in my view, it isn't right to kill someone, I thought that the assassins were cruel monsters who had no feelings, so I never really wanted to know that part of the story, but I confess that I am afraid to confront them tomorrow..." Jacob seemed to understand what you were feeling his eyes were downcast, you could hear his heavy breathing, you felt a little worried, would you said something wrong, but something surprised you when his gaze met yours you could see a little fear and sadness in his gaze.

"Do you think I'm a monster?" Jacob asked getting up and walking towards you again, you felt your body harden like a stone, your heart was beating uncontrollably, you couldn't think of anything to answer him, he knelt in front of you, still with his gaze fixed on yours, you couldn't even think, he was very close to you, his hand wrapped around yours and took the necklace you were holding between your fingers "Your grandmother gave you this didn't she? and by some fluke of life you came right to me... tell me Y/n even after I saved you, do you think I'm a monster?" His voice was husky, his touch made you sensitive, his smell made you dizzy, you are hypnotized.

"N-no, I don't think you're a monster, I... just didn't know much about.... I... and by some fluke of life you came right to me... tell me Y/n even after I saved you, do you think I'm a monster?" His voice was husky, his touch made you sensitive, his smell made you dizzy, you are hypnotized.

"N-no, I don't think you're a monster, I... just didn't know much about.... I..." Jacob's hand moved closer to your neck his fingers slid across your skin easily, you sighed deeply as you felt his skin in contact with yours, Jacob smiled, it was funny to see your submissive reaction to him, with a small gesture, he placed the necklace around your neck, caressing the back of it, but before he left, his breath-focused on your ear and with a whisper, he made your world crumble.

"Don't take this necklace off, so I'll always know why you're here"

He stood up and grabbed his coat, you were completely paralyzed, you were blushing, your breathing was heavy and panting, your gaze seemed glazed on him, he smiled and walked towards the door, but before disappearing into the darkness his voice echoed once again in the room "you better get some more rest Love tomorrow we have a long day, it was nice talking to you miss L/n". And with that he left you there alone, your heart pounding, panting, and nervous, your only thought was his voice softly caressing your ear.

You let your body fall back, staring at the window, and the rain sliding on it, you didn't realize that the train was moving again, you just let your mind wander, what would have happened if he stayed here?

Feelings and thoughts left you awake for the rest of the night, before you knew it the birds were already singing, the first rays of sunlight illuminated your smiling face.

[hacked-by-jake]

Hey Ho! :D

You will always find this post in my blog description.🥰

(Well, since there’s not really much information about me, here’s a post of things you’ve been interested in and some facts about me.)

(Thanks to the Anon for the motivation to do this here! <3)

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So, Hi! You can call me HBJ! I don’t want to mention my real name and age here. 😁

I started publishing my fanfictions here on Tumblr a little over a year ago and haven’t left since. xD

My mother tongue is not English, I am from Germany. So if you find some mistakes, please excuse it, I’m doing my best and still learning. <3

I honestly have no idea what to write here so, have fun, if anyone reads through this here. 😂 At least that’s a little bit of me. :D

>The Ask Box is always open. So feel free to ask a question if you are interested (but I want to warn you, I am not answering everything, but I will let you know in this case) < <3

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Let's start! ❤️🌹🎭

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First of all 10 Random Facts about me. This was asked by an anon. Here is the original post.

I’m a giant nerd, there’s no place in my room that’s not full of merchandise.

I prefer to read stories that are self-published, for example here on Tumblr or on other sites, rather than real books.

I have a problem with jackets, I have tons of them.

I usually dye my hair according to the colors of characters I like.It all started with green/purple - because of the Joker. And the last color I have at the moment is all green because of Joker / Loki from Marvel (Oups)

Almost all tattoos I have are about fictional characters (also Oups)

No one, really nobody knows what books/stories I read because that’s something very private to me.

I listen to music 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.

Also, it’s hard for me / I don’t like to talk about the music I listen to because this is very intimate for me for some reason.

When I watch a series, it’s at least 2 times behind each other, sometimes more often. But never just once.

Films that I watch for the first time and that excite me, I watch every second that I have time. When the movie is over, I start again unless there are several parts. But then I always watch my favorite one 500 times.

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Random questions from you.

(Asked by @procrastinatingrobin) -One place that you'd like to travel at least once in your life?

---- One of my biggest wishes is (what a cliché xD) New York. For example the “Joker Stairs”, which is one of my biggest dreams. *-*

I would love to travel to a lot of locations from my favorite movies/series.🤭

America in general is a dream for me (a German potato 😂😅).

But there are so many beautiful places to which I want to go. For example, I would love to travel to Tenerife. I know someone who lives there and every time I see pictures I get very jealous. xD

Unfortunately, I’m incredibly afraid of flying, so if that doesn’t improve, I’ll never get anywhere near these places.😫😂😂

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(Asked by Anon) How many tattoos do you have?😄

I love tattoo questions. 😂🤭At the moment I have eleven tattoos🥰

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(Asked by Anon) -What's your favorite animal?

Hmmm I don’t really know, I think they are dogs because I have a dog now. *-* But to be honest, turtles are so cool.🤔 My brother has a turtle named: Schiggy (based on Pokémon)🤭

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(Asked by Anon) -The stupidest thing that ever happened to you?

Ohhh hahaha there I have something good!😅Story Time with Hbj xD

Okay: As some might know, I’m a big fan of The Joker by DC.🃏Well, in 2019, the Joker movie with Joaquin Phoenix came to the cinemas and I was at the cinema premiere with my best friend. And the movie was absolutely amazing. I really wanted to watch the movie again..Aaaaand I was lucky because my best friend’s boyfriend also wanted to see the movie in the cinema so I went back to the cinema 5 days later to watch the movie again. I was so excited and so extremely happy that I trembled and could not stand still. xD And for these two reasons, I accidentally dropped my not really old phone. It just fell straight down on the stones in front of the cinema and the display was completely broken..Well, what can I say? I needed a new one.. 😂😅But the movie was still fantastic!😍🤭This is actually one of the stupidest things that ever happened to me. xD

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(Asked by @kyras-things) What are the little things that make your day happiest?

Oh that’s a really nice question! *-*Well, I have really little things that can make me happy. :)-It is enough for me when I wake up tomorrow and see my merchandise shelf😅 (This is right in front of my bed)This is for most something really small but for me really great and makes me happy. <3Other things are music, stroking my dog, messages on my phone, my hair color, my tattoos, when the sun is shining in the morning, coffee, riding longboard and of course (yes this is my absolute serious and not only so therefore said) tumblr and thus at the same time Duskwood. 💕I think these are the most important things. 🤭All I need is to see something that matters to me.😅🥰

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(Asked by @leetjep) Seriously....Do you ever sleep?

Very rarely😂 Last time I slept was in fall.😂

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(Asked by Anon) Ios or android?

Only related to the phone: Android.Yes, I stand by it!😂

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(Asked by @booklover-01040) Hello!I was wondering have you got any paranormal or creepy experiences? If no, then a nightmare that you will never forget.

Hey Ho! In fact, I haven’t experienced any paranormal things. Which is probably also because I don’t believe in that and I’ve found a rational cause for everything so far. (Important: I don’t believe in it, but I don’t say it doesn’t exist, I don’t want anyone to feel attacked)

And a nightmare I’ll never forget? In fact, I can’t think of any one. There’s a dream I’ve have since I was a kid: It’s about two little wolves trying to eat me. xD And I can even tell where that came from.

The movie to blame for this is: Twilight xD

Yep�� When I first watched this movie, I was way too young, and as a child I was always very anxious. Just such things and horror movies in general were terrible for me (today it is actually no longer so) (Even the dream is no longer bad today and yet it has a bitter aftertaste of childhood.)

In any case, I was much too young and that did not let me go back then. xD But a really unsettling dream I had was: Well.. Do you know the Pink Panther? 😂

I once dreamed that the Panther “chased” me through an endless long corridor. It was an endless corridor in pink with countless doors. He sang the theme song and threw clocks at me…😅 And that went on all night until I woke up.

(This, by the way, had a trigger too. A German song (the rapper only took the melody of the title music and wrote his own lyrics. The text isn’t really cool though and that’s the reason)

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(Asked by @dreamer-writer-fangirl) What color is your hair?

Well, at the moment my hair is green🤭

Check HERE and HERE for pictures.

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(Asked by Anon) Is your brother younger or older than you?🤗

My brother is older than me.🥰

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(Asked by Anon) Do you have a nickname?

Yes, actually I have one. I can even say it because it has nothing to do with my real name. :D But please don’t laugh at me. 😂Well, I have the loving nickname: Little Onion. yep…My mom gave me that name for some reasons. 😂

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(Asked by Anon) some information about your dancing?😄 you mentioned it a few days ago💃

Yeah, well, I danced for 13 years, in different groups, also several groups at the same time. :D It was the hip hop/breakdance direction. But at some point I stopped because I didn’t enjoy it in the groups anymore and time was getting tighter. :/ Unfortunately, there was and is no real other groups here, which is why I stopped completely and now only dance for myself and just for fun.🤭

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(Asked by Anon) What's your favourite food ?

Uhhhm, I think everything with pasta is my favorite food.😂 I can eat noodles all day. 🤭🍝🍜Well, and of course, Pizza!🍕Pizza is adorable. 😂

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(Asked by Anon) What type of video games do you like to play?

I don’t really have a favorite type / genre, I don’t play video games that often. I’m actually playing what looks exciting to me without any particular genre or type. 😁🤭

But if I do, I guess I’m the most Nintendo type. So most of the games I play are related to Nintendo. <3

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(Asked by @mirajane01040-duskwoodmemes) Do you play... Minecraft?

I used to play a lot of Minecraft, but nowadays not so much, and if so, then only the mobile version. This is fun for in between and dispels the boredom. I even started building Duskwood several times, but never finished it. xD Well, yes, sometimes I play Minecraft.

Answer a few days later: Yes, I do!

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(Asked by Anon) If you could be a fictional character, who would it be and why?

Oh, there are a few. xDBut the three main characters for me: Evey Hammond because of V for Vendetta. Harley Quinn because of The Joker. And, of course, my MC because of Jake. 🤭I know, very superficial reasons but I hope they are enough for you, because these are the main reasons xD 😅🤭

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(Asked by Anon) Hey hbj i'm curiousFamily or a career? 😋

I choose the career.🤭 After that, there is still enough time, and who says that not both work?😉

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(Asked by Anon) do you like alcohol?🍷

No, absolutely no. Not a little bit.

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(Asked by Anon) What is your favorite drink?

If I don’t drink coffee, I only drink sparkling water, my entire life. I very rarely drink something different. Water for life! 🧊

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Either/or questions from you.

(Asked by @duskwood-legacies) -What would you rather see, Northern Lights or sky lanterns?

That’s easy for me🤭 Northern Lights! If you ask me.. that is magical! *-* (Well, unless it’s like “Tangled” and I get a Flynn Rider.. then sky lanterns xD)

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(Asked by @duskwood-legacies) -Strawberries or raspberries?

Definitely: Strawberries🍓 *-*

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(Asked by@duskwood-legacies) Do you prefer angst or fluff?

I think it depends on the general mood I’m in.🤔 I think the best is angst with happy ending.😁

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(Asked by@duskwood-legacies) Milk or cereal first?

Obviously: Cereal first! 😂🥣

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(Asked by @justubi) Would you rather have a nosy neighbor pr noisy neighbor?

Unfortunately, I have both. xD But if I could choose, I would opt for the noisy neighbor as I wear headphones all day anyway.😂

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(Asked by @justubi) Would you rather be poor but love your job or rich but absolutely hate your job?

One hundred percent and without having to think about: poor and love my job!I could never have a job I don’t like. This is a real horror imagination for me😂

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(Asked by @kyras-things ) Prefer to write fanfics or read them?

Oh that’s a really hard question for me! 🤔 I can’t really make up my mind, but I think I’d rather read than write myself. With stories of others I can better dive into another world and relax. 🤭Because when I write, five hundred other thoughts always fly around in my head and I have to decide how to write something etc.I love writing but sometimes I wish I only had to think about a story and it would be written on a sheet right away. xD <3

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(Asked by @leetjep) Would you rather have one eye in the middle of your head or two noses?

I take the eye in the middle of my head. 😂Then I would make the Jake eye as a tattoo around it, which would be really cool.🤭

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(Continues on new asks)

[dreamiesdotcom]

fireworks | l.jn

Summary:  New Years are chances for drastic changes, so every year you make Jeno promise to never forget several things before the clock strikes 12. Now and then he makes a note to recall all the things he's sworn on, except one: that one time that never really left his mind at all.

Word Count: 2.3k

Life was a little complicated back then, if a little harsh. He was just getting used to having his brother — stepbrother, really — and the only person he knew was Na Jaemin, whose only friend was Lee Donghyuck. That's three new people he's met in four days, and he was so overwhelmed he hid in his bedroom for a day straight.

You come in a little later, and even then he knew you were a force to be reckoned with. The stubborn Lee Donghyuck was in some way caught in your strings, and Renjun (who he's very intimidated by) allows you to pinch his cheeks — what kind of power, right?

It all starts from when he was 12 years old, newly moved to the Neighborhood, on the 23rd of December.

The first shift was when the year ended and another began, welcomed by the brightest set of fireworks Jeno's ever watched. Amidst it all, Jaemin invites all of you to go and hang-out, having already asked your parents way before he asked you all. You had pointed at him then.

"Don't forget to come, okay, Jeno?" you tell him, head slightly tilted. "We're friends now. I would seriously be upset if you don't show up!"

"Sure but uh, my parents— what's that?"

"Nana's got it under control, and well, pinky swear!" you link your pinkies together, and you offer him a sweet smile. "You break the promise and expect me to cut your fingers off."

Donghyuck's friends... are quite scary, per se, but he made a promise that night. His heart raced quickly at that thought, and he shakes slightly, but another round of fireworks burst up the sky, and this time it's much more brilliant, even more radiant, and as all of you exchange smiles, he knows that he's made friends as well.

###

Something about Jeno is astral, you concluded. He just doesn't believe it.

"You see that Jen?" you asked him one of the many times you've asked him to stay up with you. He remembers the honeyed-laughter you let out then, "That's the brightest star in the sky as seen from Earth, and it's called Sirius."

He couldn't form words then. He didn't know what it was that got him so stunned, but he knew that it was something beautiful; whether it's the stars or you.

He remembers what makes his heart go wild: "And to me, if I was the Earth, that'll be you. You're my Sirius."

Jeno hoped it meant something. He wished that it meant as much to you as it did to him because he keeps on losing sleep dreaming of how hypnotic you look, mind void of anything else aside from redamancy. He hopes it means something even after he realizes that it's just like you to associate people with celestial bodies.

"Renjun's like the moon..." you sighed wistfully, chin resting on your palms. "He seems so far away, distant and mysterious. He's the type of person you never truly know... but sometimes, a person always makes effort to glance at it more often than the others. That person knows less of his mystery and more of his misery, at that point."

"And that person, I suppose, is you? You know him the most."

"And I... the things you're implying!" you groaned. "Stop fooling around, Hyuck."

The clock moves closer to 12, and Jeno decides that it's now or never — he asks a question: "If at one point, you have to choose; would you rather have the moon or the stars?"

"I would rather have them together," comes rather too quickly, way too mindlessly. "The stars would be lonely without the moon, and it goes both ways."

"But—"

"No one's more than the other," you shrug, turning to face him. "You overheard it, didn't you? Well, don't worry about it."

Guilt washes over his face, and you shake your head slightly as you raise both your hands to cup his cheeks. It's quiet for a moment just like the way it's always been when the world holds their breaths, counting down and anticipating the last number. That space has somewhat always been empty, the one that makes him think — this silence is the type that echoes, the type that feels cold. It emphasizes all his feelings.

"You're still my Sirius, Jen," you whisper, and if you weren't so close, the fireworks would've drowned your confession. His eyes flutter at the warm feeling your words give him. "You'll always be my favorite. Now, promise me that you won't ever question that."

He nods and makes his promise, but it doesn't mean he stops being anxious. What if one day, you look up at the night sky and realize that you preferred the moon over Sirius, after all?

"I can see the hesitance in your eyes," you say even softer this time. The fireworks subside, just like the loudness of his heart, but then as if in sync they start up again — the fireworks and his heartbeat. You smiled, and both of them returned much stronger than the last. "Please don't doubt me."

It's alright, he concludes. He realizes that he doesn't need to be your favorite. Just as long as he has you — because that's what he wants the most at the moment. He wants you all to himself for as long as he can have you, and you looked so lovely that he almost tells you that and the galaxies of words occupying his mind since summer two years ago — he wants to say them slowly so you won't forget, so that he closes the tiniest distance separating the both of you that feels so big despite being unnamed, a haunting chasm that spreads further every shuddering breath —

But he doesn't.

###

It certainly is illegal.

How it happened is a little bit crazy — well, not really, but just like most of Jeno's irrational decisions, it starts from Donghyuck's stories and then boils down to his curiosity. Flash forward to right now, an unexpected but welcomed masterpiece in front of you, Jeno admiring the painted wall with delight and proudness ebbing through his veins. Around him, spray paint cans lie empty, some half-full.

'Hyuck and Renjun does it all the time, and they've never been in trouble,' Jeno said.

'You're dumb and I can't believe I'm letting you do this,' you replied.

But why should you stop?

Jeno looks regal when he's breathless like this, adrenaline sparkling in his eyes like the golden glitter staining his eyelids. This side of him is nowhere soft — it's too passionate, too unknown, too beautiful to not be overwhelming. You manage a muffled call of his name.

An instant before 23:59 turns to zero, the year beginning again. You spend half of that minute staring at each other, somewhere along the way a force pulling you so close to him.

"I need you to swear on it." you manage to say between the blurs. "Promise me we'll always stay like this."

Ten, nine, eight

"Promise." He says, raspy, pinky finger entwined with yours. He cups your cheeks, gentle, just carefully watching. He smiles. "You and me, like this, forever."

Seven, six, five

His stare is firm, but at the same time, it's so gentle. It's as if he's seeing you in a new light and he wants to miss none of it, not even a split-second. Your eyes flutter shut.

"Can I kiss you?"

Four, three, two

Your heart beats aggressively against your chest, your toes curling in your shoes out of nervousness. Despite that, you nod your head enthusiastically, something he always found so endearing.

"Of course, yes, please."

One

Fireworks burst into sparkling reds and golden yellows, both in the night skies and your hearts. Your lips each a lustrous star, crashing together ever so softly, sparkling like luminous spheres about to go supernova — the kiss a cyclopean shift to the Universe's plan.

###

People change all the time. Friends are people. It's only normal to drift apart a little, right?

After all, it doesn't matter if you don't hang out as much as then. It's reasonable, honestly. Donghyuck's been immersed in his music these days, Jaemin spends most of his time hanging around the dance studio and bothering a certain boy named Jisung (bless his heart for not murdering Jaemin yet) while Renjun's busy... doing his thing. Hell knows what he's been up to, but the last time Jeno's seen him, he has an overwhelming amount of books stacked on his table ("It's a queue, Jeno. I'm reading the next one after this once I finish!"), and he just hopes he doesn't take three years before finishing all those up.

"Why is it that it's so hard for them to make time to be normal friends?"

"It's hard for them to make time to be normal people, what do you expect?" you roll your eyes, turning off your phone and then sitting right across from him. "We'll meet next Sunday, anyway. Let's give those people hell from us both!"

From outside, the world celebrates a new incoming year, but for some odd reason, you two stayed inside his room. Light seeps in from his open window, seeping golds and violets and reds, occasional greens, and other colors. All it does is remind him of that kiss. It sends a flush on his cheeks, especially when you leaned to press a kiss on his forehead, ever so careful.

Jeno would like to believe that it was out of random, but he felt like at that moment, you knew something he didn't.

"Promise me something, yeah?" you asked, nervous. "Promise me you'll never forget that I love you."

"I pro—" he says as if a routine, but then he halts. "You what?"

The fireworks stop, and the both of you knew that it only takes a little seconds before they ignite again. You looked up to meet his gaze, mustering up courage, and making your voice silvery and clear.

"I love you," you said, shaking. "So fucking much, Jeno. Now promise me."

He stays in stunned silence for a little, and then he pulls you into a hug so tight neither of you ever wanted to let go. His breathing was shaky and so was yours, a feeling as unstable and as sweet as the kiss you two shared right after he whispered an answer, "I promise."

And that was enough for you to know that he loves you too.

("I feel cheated that you never told me. We could've been doing this for years," he nags later once you're spooning in his bed, his chest pressed against your back. You break into laughter then, still coming down from the high of sparkling lights and pure euphoria.

"We're just in time, love. There's no need to rush when we have an infinity ahead of us.")

###

It's easier to remember moments that passed like headlights on highways at full speed when all is said and done. If that makes sense at all, maybe that could be the reason why he just realized it now that neither of you two got to tell how much you wanted to be so much more than friends who confessed to having feelings for each other. You never clearly talked where you should stand.

If he were to say his truth, he'd say that there was way more than to how you looked against the bright lights exploding and the towns of stars. There's way more to you than the way you made his heart beat, skip, and ache. The truth is, you were heavenly. It made his heart do all the things it could do so he's unable to speak. The truth is, he knew where it was going, and he didn't want to travel that road. The truth is, he's been falling for the longest time, but the truth is not important.

Because not even the truth could have given you the freedom to have a choice, he says in his mind.

"Promise me you won't forget me." You looked so gentle close to him like that, skin reflecting moonlight and flares. "Please, baby. Promise me."

But it's the last thing he ever wanted to do. He doesn't want you to make him swear to never forget you — you have forever waiting ahead, and you're walking down that road hand-in-hand. Why does he need to promise to always remember when there's no reason he'll forget? It's the last thing he needs. He'll have you next to him every day and there would be no hour that expires where he doesn't hold you, no second that passes that he doesn't feel like he loves you.

He didn't want to have to promise that because people only ask to be remembered if they're planning to leave.

Jeno closes his eyes, lowering his head. "Don't do this to me."

Still, after the most painful kiss he ever had, it lingers both like sugar and poison at his lips, your name, and a promise. A promise he never wanted to make.

"We'll see each other again..." he whispers, painfully fond. "For now... for now, we'll take some time and wish that the Universe brings us back together...If the Universe doesn't do it for us, then I will. I promise."

He recalls the night before, then all the previous others that stands out with vibrant colors and the love of his life. He crosses his fingers and wishes that sometime somewhere, you look up to watch fireworks but see Sirius instead — and it reminds you to come home.

[xmemeanonx]

*listening to friends and right here by chase atlantic* the angst you could come up with these songs are wonderful! And scary but like I was just getting inspiration for like yandere teenage damian and reader just having trouble with one another... In the most Wattpad fanfic way possible it was awesome (off topic but I have this odd version of older damian I could talk about him but I'm running out of words for Tumblr!!)

* Vietnam war flashbacks of when I wrote stupid shit on wattpad * Oof, sure why not! Please tell me your odd version of older Damian! I’d love to hear it! Enjoy, darling!

= = =

Romantic! Yandere! Damian Wayne: possessive, stalker, obsessive, manipulative

= = =

You have imagined what being in love would feel like. A warm, fuzzy feeling whenever you thought of person. Always thinking of them, especially in your darkest moments.

Being loved, an exciting thought that helps you fall asleep at night, yet inspires you to wake up in the morning.

You thought your life would be perfect when you met the one. But it has been anything but.

= = =

Your interactions with him leave you feeling cold and unwanted. Nothing you do ever seems to make him happy. You sometimes wonder if you’ll one day have to tear yourself apart to just see him smile.

You haven’t seen your friends in weeks. They’ve tried to talk and text you, but you just ignore them, hearing his voice ringing in your head,

“I don’t like your friends. Stop hanging out with them.”

You know that you shouldn’t listen to him, but you love him too much to risk the chance of his walking out on you too.

= = =

Lying on your bed, staring the ceiling above, admiring the cracks and water damage. You feel like it’s a metaphor for your life, broken, damaged, yet still trying to keep it together and not completely falling down.

You feel Damian shift beside you. This has been a common thing for the two of you. He’ll only ever really come over when your parents aren’t home, they get a weird vibe from him. They know who he is though, who his father is, so they don’t say anything.

You haven’t ever really done anything with him, besides kissing and a few hickeys here and there. He says he would never force you to do anything you didn’t want to do. So you feel you could trust him enough to just sleep in your bed with you.

“Good morning, sleepyhead.”

He smiles softly, rubbing his eyes. It softer times like this when you forget about the harder ones.

“What time is it?” He asks groggily.

You peer over him at your alarm clock, “about 5:35 pm.”

He hums in acknowledgement.

The two of you sit in silence, enjoying each other’s company, listening to the sounds of Gotham from your open window. The gold light from the setting sun peers in from your window, filling your room with a yellow colour that reminds you of honey. It’s truly a beautiful sight.

“(Y/N)?”

You turn to him.

“Do you ever want to meet my father?”

You don’t really know what to do with that question. You want to tell him you do, but yet, you really don’t want to continue to lie to him on how your truly feeling.

“No. . . N-not really, Damian.”

He sits up from lying on his back, he props himself up against your headboard. He cocks his brow.

“Why not?”

You lean your head on your hand, sighing.

“Because. . . . Because I don’t think we’re ready for that.”

He squints at you, then looks down at his feet in thought. You feel like you should take back what you said, but how could you? Is it already to late?

“Eventually you will meet him,” he says so quietly you could barely hear him, “if we ever want to go further in this relationship.”

You surprised to hear him say that, but you can tell whats more surprising, how serious he sounded or, how anxious that thought made you feel. Weren’t you in love too?

You laugh nervously, unable to meet his eye, “I-I wouldn’t say anything like that yet, Damian, I mean. . . .” You try to swallow your nervousness down, “I mean we’re so young and-and I don’t, I mean, I don’t think we should be thinking about that type of. . . . Stuff yet.”

Why are you so nervous?

“What do you mean?” He say angrily, brows furrowed, “don’t you love me?”

You look up in pure shock, “oh my god no- I mean, yes, yes I love you Damian. It’s just that we’re still teenagers and I mean there are a lot of different people in the world and neither of us have met any of them and I’m just saying that I-“

“Are you fucking cheating on me?”

You feel your breath catching your throat. You gulp slowly taking in his words completely, “wha-what?” You say quietly.

You see him scowl at you in anger, “I fucking knew it-“ he says, angrily getting up from your bed.

You cant believe what you’re hearing, what you’re seeing. You can’t breathe. Oh no, no no no nonono no, please not a panic attack now, out of any time please just not now. You feel tears bubbling in your eyes.

“Who is it! Ryan, Max, Josh?” He moves around as he speaks, showing how angry he is. You feel frozen, you can’t move, you can’t breathe, you can’t think, you can’t feel, you can’t hear, you can’t, you can’tyoucantyoucantyoucantyouca-

“(Y/N)!”

You look up, yet you could barely see him through your tears.

“Are you even listening to me!?”

You stare at him blankly.

He grinds his teeth in anger, glaring, “you weren’t, I fucking knew it. Do you care about this relationship? About me? I bet you don’t, you only think about yourself, all the damn ti-“

You let out a horrific whail. No nononon no no, not now! You have never cried in front of him before. The sound of it sounds like you’ve been shot.

Your sobs fill the room. They don’t stop coming either. Ever bad thought is coming to your mind right now, making you cry even more.

He just stands there, staring at you. He wants to tell you to stop it, to stop crying. What do you even have to cry about? Yet at the same time, this could be the perfect moment to take advantage of your emotionally weakened state, to feed you even more lies.

He slowly sits beside you on the bed, staring at you for a moment until he puts a hand on you back, rubbing it in comfort.

He feels and hears you sob harder. He shushes you, trying to comfort your aching soul. He doesn’t know caused the tears flooding out of your eyes, but when he finds out-

There wont be much left.

When your sobs quiet down, he whispers softly it’s okays, I love yous, and you’re alright in you ear. Your breathing is shallow, you’re trying to even it out.

You wipe your eyes after a few minutes of evening your breathes. You sniffle.

“I’m not cheating on you, Damian.”

He smiles softly, nodding, “I know.”

You sit in silence.

“I’m tired.”

“Okay, lets go to bed.” He says, pulling the covers back.

Laying you down on his chest, the two of you sigh in unison.

“. . . . I love you, Damian”

He smiles at your ceiling, “I know”

“. . . . . I’m sorry, Damian”

“I know”

You look up at him, “will you always watch over me?”

He looks at you eyes lovingly, “I already do, dear”

You smile, putting your head back on his chest.

“That’s good”

And as you drift off to sleep, calmly knowing you have the love of your life close by, you feel at peace. When you wake up you will know he will be there.

He, Damian Wayne. The love of your life. The person you dreamed of loving when you were a kid. Thought of him make you a warm, fuzzy feeling.

Yeah just like when you were a kid.

= = =

I see a lot of personality similarity’s with him and five. This is sorta the opposite of my Luther fic too! I really like the concept of something constantly trying to feel love from someone who doesn’t give a shit about them! I love angst dammit!

[bloodyrippah]

Klaus Mikaelson "How about round four?"

Klaus x my oc Romeo (not edited)

Warning: Mention of abuse, talks about trauma, sexual scene, mpreg.

I woke up to the sound of Romeo screaming and turning in his sleep, his night terror we're no secret to me but it did worry me that he still had them, even after two years of that bastard being dead, I only wish there was some way I could help ease his pain. I couldn't have a witch perform magic on him, he would never forgive me if he ever found out, I still had secrets from him. Secrets I could never tell him. Shifting from my side I gently shook his shoulders, he shook violently before scrambling awake, I brought him into my arms softly kissing his head." It was just a dream, " I whispered, he cried into my arms, I laid back down rubbing his back.

"Im sorry I woke you up, " Romeo whispered softly, he sniffed caressing my face, I kissed his head rubbing his arm.

"It's quite alright, " I told him shifting slowly, I laid on my side looking at him, he sniffed closing his eyes, tears stressed down his pale freckled cheeks, his lips pressed into a thin line as they quivered. He looked so broken and fragile." Do you want to talk about it?!" I questioned with raised brows, he shook his head.

" I just....just hold me please, " He softly told me, I nodded my head pulling him closer, I hoped he would start telling me of his troubles and the abuse soon, the only way I knew was through Elijah, the face still being kept up. It needed to stay that way.

"I hope you will tell me of your troubles one day, " I told him caressing his soft large hands, they were soft and very smooth, I always loved holding it.

He caressed my face leaning closer to me." I know, " he kissed me, I smiled into the kiss, my eyes closed savouring the passionate kiss we shared." I love you, " my eyes widen at his words, love. I had not thought about that. Was I in love with him, I was, I was, two years was a long time and I had been in love with him for a year now. It was something we never talked about, he was my true mate and it was bound to happen one day but in our case, it was very different and he was still healing.

"I know, " I whispered, I knew he loved me, he almost said it a few hours ago, he was scared. I knew he was hence I was easy and I waited until he was ready, no matter how many years it took. I had eternity and in some way, I guess he does as well.

"Im sorry, I shouldn't have, " Romeo opened his eyes looking at me, his whisky golden brown eyes dimmed into mine, I shook my head at his words, I myself wasn't sure I was ready to say it. It was beginning to feel all too real now.

"No, " I took a deep breath." come here, " I pulled him closer. He laid his head on my chest, wrapping his arms around me. I kissed his head.

**

The morning I woke up to the sun meaning through the curtains, I groaned holding up my arm to cover my face, I felt a lifted weight on my body, opening one of my eyes, I found the bes empty, looking at the clock on the wall, it was about 7:45 am, getting out of bed, I walked to the bathroom to freshen up. A while later after getting ready for the day, I walked into the kitchen to find Romeo making breakfast, I smiled watching him hum to the song playing through the speaker, I walked behind him wrapping my arms around his waist, he leaned closer to me, I kissed his neck closing my eyes." Morning, " I told him caressing his back, he raised his head placing his lips on mine, I moaned turning him around, he drapes one arm around my neck pulling me closer.

"Im making pancakes, " He told me in a cherry tone, he looked better than he did a few hours ago.

"I love your pancakes, " I told him, he was a very good cook, I loved his food despite not needing it but keeping up the facade was very prominent.

"Mm, " He hummed kissing me once more.

"We should talk about what happened last night, " I spoke up as we were getting ready to eat breakfast, he hummed nodding his head.

"If it's about me saying I love you, just forget about that, " Romeo said avoiding eye contact with me, it would be awkward given the fact that I didn't say it back.

'No, it's not that, " I dropped the fork and took hold of his hand." It's about the way you left things, going to bed angry, " I said, it was about the fact he wanted to have sex out of impulse and I said no and he got angry, I wasn't mad about that, I wanted him to understand that I was scared he would later regret it.

"Yeah, about...." He trails off and I nodded my head taking a sip of my drink. "I'm sorry, I still have that habit of doing things too..." he trailed off and I nodded understanding where he was heading with this, I placed his hand to my life gently kissing it.

"I just want us to move up to the next phase of our relationship when you are ready, " I softly told him caressing his hands, he nodded his head and smiled.

"I know, " He leaned forward placing a soft kiss to my lips, I closed my eyes savouring the moment we shared, I pulled him closer to me, he sat on my lap and moaned into the kiss.

"We should probably leave soon, " I said in between kisses, I never wanted the moments I had with him to end, I wanted to be locked all the way out here forever of we had to, away from everyone. Have him all to myself. That would truly be a wish come true.

**

ROMEO'S P.O.V

A while later Nik and I were at a skating park in the town, I loved skating and I was a pro at it, Richard and I always went together, it was something we loved to fo on a daily basis, we stood on the ice skating back and forth, our hands held together, he placed his lips to my head and I smiled at the affectionate touch he displayed on me. I always loved the little thing he did for me. When he was angry, he always made sure to stay away, calm his nerve. I loved that he didn't lash out on me as Richard would, I shredded at the thought of when Richard would best me senselessly, it made me feel so little and I never wanted to feel that way again. I was falling more and more in love with Nik by the moment and it scared me because of how fast I was falling and it had been two years.

Surviving from a traumatic relationship would take a long time and two years wasn't enough time to become yourself again, I was slowly healing from that point of my life. I wanted to forget about Richard and all he put me through and ot was a lot, I held onto Nik's hand swirling around, a smile on my lips. The day had been going great so far, it was nice being away from Greenville and everything and everyone. I swirled behind Nik pulling him safely towards me.

I wanted to move our relationship further, I was tired at putting it all at wit's end, it wasn't fair to Nik and it wasn't fair to me as well. I deserved better and I wanted us to move forward, I wanted us to have sex, tonight. I wasn't going to let Richard control me anymore. I was going to be happy in my relationship.

"Hey, " I said smiling widely at him, he turned at me, oh god that marvellous grin of us, my heart always seems to beat ten times faster, faster than it ever did with Richard, I wasn't scared of my life around him when he was angry. He never let me know he was. I loved that, he was possessive yes and sometimes controlling but he tried not to be with me given the fact that my deceased husband was basically dictating everything I did in my life. I could sense a dangerous streak about Klaus and it did sometimes scare me but I never thought anything else of it, it was sometimes hard to figure him out like he held a secret and I was drawn to that. I was drawn to his danger. I was indeed sick, it was the same way I was drawn to Richard, I only hoped our relationship wouldn't turn out like that. I could not deal with another Richard in my life. I honestly couldn't.

"Are you having fun?!" Nik asked me smiling brightly at me, I nodded my head, the sound of the music in the skating ring entered my ear and the sliding of skating shoes also counted into my ear, I wrapped ny arms around his neck placing a soft kiss to his lips.

"I really am, " I told him in a soft tone filled with affection for him, he was always doing things to make me happy and I had not been this happy in a when I was with Richard during the last few months of our relationship. "Thank you, " I finished pecking his lips repeatedly, he moans into the kiss holding my face. "Come on, I am quite parched, " I told him in the same posh tone he always speaks in, he chuckles at my words.

We went to the bar to get ourselves a drink, I stood behind Nik, I tightly squeezed my left wrist, the pain erupted slowly when I dug my nails into the heap of my skin, I, I bit my lips tightly and took a deep breath watching Nik order drinks and snacks for the both of us, he turns around and I pull my sleeve down, I smiled at him before pecking his lips.

We sat at the booth and I took a sip of the beer Nik had gotten me, placing my hands on the table I pulled out my phone to check on the kids, I was anxious about being away from Evie, Lydia, Thomas and Freddie for so long, I had not been away from them for a week before, when I went to business trips, I took them with me, things had drastically changed after Richard died, Freddie and Thomas was two years old and my blood boiled knowing our children weren't going to father another parent in their life, I was the only parent I had left. I had adopted Evie as my own when I got pregnant with Thomas and Frederick, she had been getting well with us and getting used to it, Richard made her and Lydia go to the Boarding school, he said it was in Prague, Czech Republic and was called BloodCoat, the name was creepy, I had been there once to check it out and it was well, Richards taste, his great-grandfather who I met a few times owned it. Giving the fact that he and Fallon grew up there, I was disappointed to know he held little part in raising them, he wasn't anything like Richard, I thought he would be a fucking rich dick and all about having a boarding school that I couldn't it on google, it felt off to me but Richards family owned it so I guess it was okay. Richard wanted Freddie to attend when he was seven years old just like Lydia did when she turned seven.

It seems like a good school but I would teach my children to be good girls and a boy, to be respectful and responsible. I took a deep breath narrowing my eyes at Nik who caressed my wrist, the pain from constantly hurting myself presented itself when he softly gave it a soft squeeze, I bit my like to stop myself from wincing, Nik had no idea that I hurt myself and it was pathetic of me to keep doing that even after surviving years of abuse from Richard. It felt like somehow he was still here and he was making me hurt myself but that wasn't the case. I was sick and I needed to stop thinking I deserved to be hurt. Did I really?

"Are you alright?!" Nik questioned me, I nodded my head taking a few my chips, he narrowed his eyes at me before caressing my hand.

A few hours later, after having a fun day out, it was about eight pm and I was heavily tired and tomorrow was going to be special, I was going to give myself to him. I felt like I was ready to take this step. Its been two years and the only sexual thing we've done is give each other blow job for the first time and it happened ...well a few times this morning. Entering the house, I instantly went to the bedroom where I jumped on the newly made bed, a groan escaped my lips, I felt Nik rub my back getting on top of me, I moaned when I felt his hands enter my jeans and boxers.

"Nik," I moaned out into the bedsheet when he began caressing my member, I bit my lips tightly to stop the moan that was coming out of my lips, I couldn't hold it in, he began kissing my neck and biting my earlobes.

"Do you like that?!" Nik whispers into my ears, I raised my head and kissed his lops, I flipped us overtaking off my red leather jacket, I leaned down placing my lips on his, he moaned wrapping his arms around my neck. I was ready. I really was but I was patient to wait until I was truly sure.

"I love that, " I whispered biting his lips seductively, I fiddled with the zip of his jeans. " I can't wait to see what you do to me next, " I whispered selectively. He grinned at me pecking my lips.

"Come on, let's get freshen up, "

The next morning I woke up drenched in sweat, I was thankful I didn't wake up screaming, looking at the time it was 8 am and Nik was sleeping peacefully, I got out of bed taking a deep breath, my feet creaked on the floor, walking into the bathroom, I looked at myself in the mirror, I was now a different person or at least I was trying to be who I was meant to be, I squeezed my left wrist very tightly before grazing my fingers roughly into my skin, I bit my lips tightly feeling pain erupt through my wrist and my roughly button lips. I closed my eyes trying to clear out my nightmare. It was always the incident with Richard, it scared me knowing I was still suffering, I was hurting myself. I winched releasing my wrist before I started transcending up.

A little while later, I stood at the balcony of the cabin, dresses in a red tracksuit bottom, a blue shirt, I was barefoot and in my handheld a mug of coffee mixed with bourbon, I leaned against the door watching as the snow fell down, the leaves on the trees blew from side to side and the chirping of birds, I closed my eyes but the dream kept evading in my mind.

I jumped when I felt hands on my back, turning around I stopped at the sight of Klaus." You scared me, " I placed my hands on my chest taking a deep breath, he grinned before leaning forward to kiss me, I smiled pecking his lips." Sleep well, " I asked him walking inside the living room, I closed the sliding glass doors before walking to the living room.

"I did. Woke up without you, " Nik placed his hands on my shoulders, I looked up at him and smiled.

"Sorry, had a bad dream, " I told him taking a seat on the couch, my feet crossed Indian style, Nik took a deep breath sitting down next to me. He rubbed my thighs before playing my feet on his lap, he was dressed in his usual jeans and shirt, he looked freshened for the day.

"I really wish you would start opening up to me, " He told me but I could tell he was annoyed at the fact that I speak to my counsellor about my problems instead of him and I could understand where he was coming from. I really could. I was afraid." Instead of your bloody therapist, " He rolled his eyes giving me a look, I looked away from his gaze, he was angry at that and I was always able to notice when he was angry or in a mood and it was the same with Richard. I wanted to stay away from him if he was angry.

"I know, " I rubbed his arm before taking jis hand in mine, I placed a soft kiss on it." Be patience baby, " I told him softly, he stood up abruptly pulling away from me.

"That's bloody it, it's been two bloody year's and you won't even... God, " Nik yelled loudly, his vein clenching, I jumped at the volume of his voice but also the anger behind it.

"Nik, " I reached to hold his hand but he recoiled hitting me in the face, I stopped in the track.

"Romeo, that was an accident, "

I held my face feeling my eyes water at that, accident or not, it brought up bad and horrific memories that I wanted to put behind me, I couldn't stop the low sob that escaped my lips, I flinched away from his coming touch standing up from the couch, he looked at me the same way Richard did when he first laid his hand on me, he said the same thing. 'it was an accident,' to me, it didn't seem like that to me at the moment.

"I swear, it was an accident, " Nik tried to say but I was already leaving the living room, I found myself sitting at the window bed in the bedroom looking at the window, I soon heard footsteps but kept my gaze away from Nik. " It really was an accident, " Nik sat in front of me at the window bed, he took my face in his hand caressing it." I promise, I would never.....never...ever dare lay my hands on you like that or even think of doing it, " he told me softly, I looked into his eyes, I could tell he was telling the truth, I pulled him into a hug caressing his head.

"Its okay, baby, " I whispered rubbing his back, he kissed my cheeks, I pulled away pecking his lips before deepening it. " I love you, " I told him looking into his eyes, I was hoping he truly felt the same way I was starting to feel and he would say it back. I desperately wanted this to work. I needed to truly be free.

I began to feel my eyes water at his quiet facade, he truly was quiet. He didn't love me as I loved me, I was such a fool. " Oh...Romeo, " Nik pulled away from me, I shook my head." I'm just..."

"No, don't. Its quite alright, " I told him pulling my knee up to my chest, he shook his head.

"It wasn't that, I love you too, I am very much in love with you and I have not felt like this in a long time, " Nik told me holding my face in his hands, I felt my eyes tear up at his words, I looked into his eyes, it was like I could sense his emotion, he truly did love me.

I placed my lips on him standing up." I'm ready, I mean it, " I told him breathing heavily, he looked at me before carrying me into his arms, I wrapped my legs around his neck as he carried me over to the bed and gently laid me down.

I cupped his cheeks pressing my lips against his, he moaned into the chaste kiss I began placing on his lips, my left arm slowly caressed his neck before wrapping around ut, he pulls me closer, his hand roaming around my body and into my pants, I let out a low moan into his lips, my lips detecting from his towards his cheeks, I began placing soft and delicate kiss on down his neck, my hand pulled at his shirt, he pulls away looking me in the eyes, he wanted to make sure I was indeed ready and I was, I truly was and I wanted us to take things further, two years we started this relationship and we hardly did anything and I wanted us to be better and grow closer. I pulled his head down placing my lips on his once again, he begins fiddling with my shirt, a low growl rumble through his lios and I churned, I could feel my member growing and I could feel him, it was begging to be touched and I wanted this to be taken slow and perfect. I raised my head as our kiss got more passionate and loving.

"I love you, " I whispered to Nik who took off my shirt showing my masculine and tone upper body, I ran my hands down Niks upper body before reaching to remove his jeans, he holds my hand.

"Relax, " Nik whispered seductively into my ears, I closed my eyes listening to the sound of his raspy and deep voice, it was like music to my ears and I never wanted him to stop talking. "Let me show you how much I love you, " He whispered, I placed my lips to his cheeks, my hands caressing his. I looked into his eyes, I couldn't look away, god was as breathtaking as the day I met him.

He began trailing kisses down my chest, I bit my lips letting out a low moan, I couldn't help but curl my fingers into the roots of his hair, he growled and I felt chills run down my spine, Ioved his growl. it was demanding and dominate, loving, God I loved what he did to me. "Nik, " I moaned out when pulled down my tracksuit bottoms and boxers off, I moaned when I felt his hand gently held my large and swollen member, I raised my head propping on my elbow to watch him, I opened my mouth letting out a loud rumbling moan, I throw my head back when I felt his wet mouth around my member, his hands caressing it softly, his head bobbing up and down, almost choking, I felt myself slowly reach my peak, gripping his head tighter, my body clenches tightly and I moaned loudly."Ah-oh. Fuck. Fuck. Nik, oh fuck, " I curled my lips into a thin line, he bit my lips letting out several loud moans, Nik gagged looking at me, I moaned when he placed a soft kiss to the tip of my member, he caressed the tip, my precum leaking, I moaned throwing my head back, he caressed my member jerking me off, I began releasing cum all over him and myself, I fell back on the bed breathing heavily, I felt Nik trail kisses up my chest, I moaned holding his face, he placed his lips to mine.

"You taste magnificent, " Nik whispers into my lips, I looked into his eyes before kissing him, my hands caressing his chest until it touched his own lathe and swollen never, he moans into my mouth when I began jerking him off, I grunted when I felt his hands on my member, I deepened the kiss, he began trailing kisses down my neck, I moaned, my hands caressing the wet tip of his member, he clenches around my hold and I smirk.

"Nik, " I moaned into his ears, my hand gently turning around his member, I grabbed his balls gently massaging it, he moans loudly and I laughed into the kiss when he places his lips on mine again, he holds my face and moaned. I began feeling his hands caress my asscheeks and gripped them, I threw my head back letting out a moan, my hands caressing his member, he pushed one finger into my asshole and I let out a low moan, I couldn't help the next moan that escaped my lips when he slipped in another finger, I moaned gripping his member, I began moving my hips to his fingers slipping in and out, the pleasure was so great, I moaned when he slipped in another finger, oh god, Nik's moans entered my ears.

"You are so tight, " Nik moaned slipping in the fourth finger to lose me up, I moaned into his lips, he pulled out and turned me around, my ass raises in the air, I gripped the sheets waiting for this to happen, we had seen each other naked, it felt great and also so shy, this was our first time together.

"Nik, " I moaned out when he slowly slipped his member into my asshole, I closed my eyes tightly letting out a squealed moan, he slowly goes deeper, I hiss gripping the bedhead tightly, he enters me fully and slowly begins going in and out, I raise my head turning my face to kiss him, I moaned into his lips when he began going faster, the bed began slamming violently into the wall. "Oh fuck, " I cried helplessly feeling my hole get wetter and fill with profound pleasure, I gripped his neck letting out a strangled cry, my lips brushed against his and his hands began rubbing my member.

"Fuck, you're so tight, " Nik pushed me down to the bed, he grabbed my waist thrusting deeper into me, it began going rough and I loved it, I couldn't help the loud moan that entwined with Nik's. "Oh fuck." The slapping of his balls into my ass echoed into my ears, I cried out again gripping the bed sheet, my head faced down on the bed, my lips curled open and another loud moan escaped my lips, Nik begins to slow down and I feel him grab my back, I push my hips towards him, my ass slapping against his front, he pushes himself deeper hitting my prostate, I moaned out crying, I could feel tears stream down my face.

"Ah, oh fuck, baby, oh god, " This was better than anything, I screamed into the bed, I felt him grip the back of my neck and raise me up, I wrapped my arms around his neck, he grabs one of my legs and wraps it around his waist, slamming lovingly into my hole.

"You like that," Nik whispered into my ears as he begins to go faster, so fast I couldn't even keep up with his loud moans." How I fuck your brains out, " He grunts slamming faster into me, I cried out.

"You're so fucking god, Oh my god, baby, yes. Oh god, " I cried out, I bit my lips looking him in the eyes, I was shaking and he loved watching me, god, I should not have waited two years to finally have sex. I cried placing my lips to his, he grunts into the kiss, I pull away.

"You like that, huh, you dirty dirty man, " He gripped my neck when we both fell onto the bed, I moaned out, my hand jerking off my dick which was leaking with cum, I was getting so close." You like that rough, " He trusted deeper swiftly, he pulls out and slams roughly I to me.

"Oh-Fuck, " I moaned out turning my head, I looked into his eyes as he fucked me senselessly." Oh yes, yes baby, right there, " I moaned into his lips He pulls my lips back when I tried pulling away, I moaned out. " Fill me up, " I moaned out loudly, the bed slamming more violently into the wall makes one of the paintings fall down and shatters, I let out a loud masculine cry as I feel.myself slowly reach my peak. I could care less if we used protection. "Fuck...fuckkk. Yes. Baby, right there, fill me up with your fucking cum, " I moaned into his lips, he grunted, I looked into his eyes, my brows furrowed together.

"Oh fuck, I will fill you up, " "You like that, " He began jerking off my dick and I moaned letting out a cry. "Fuck you're so hard, " He jerks off my dick faster, I cried into his lips, my hand gripped his neck." I'm so close, " Nik moaned.

"Oh baby, right there, " I held his hand which held mine, I moaned loudly, he begins to slow down, slowly thrusting in and out, I moaned lowly, I felt him release inside me and I couldn't help but want him to fill me up some more. I moaned when he released more got liquid into my ass, I cummed all over our hands and on the bed, the both of us collapse letting out deep breaths, both laid on our mess, I began to feel his cum trail down my legs, I moaned when he pulled out, I laid bedside him pulling myself closer to him.

I breathed out looking at Nik, our body in a weird position, I laid half on top of him, our members touching." I love you, " I whispered caressing his face, I placed my hands on his chest pulling myself on top of him, he held my waist caressing it. . took hold of his member caressing it, I softly forced it into my hole, he moaned looking into my eyes, I slowly rolled my hips rocking back and forth, my hands gripped his neck gently, I leaned down placing my lips on him, he grabbed my ass spreading them, he begins to thrust into me as I ride him, I wrapped my arms around his neck, my lips on his as our lips and tongue danced in a passionate fire, I rode him faster, my ass slamming against his thighs, our moans echoed into our lips, his dick entering and coming out, I rolled my his feeling myself reach my peak, I moaned into his lips letting out a chuckle as we come came, I came on his chest and he filled me up once again, I pulled away laying beside him, I breathed out heavily and looked at him, my body shook from. the activity we had just done.

"We should have done this sooner, " Nik spoke up and I laughed, looking into his eyes I caressed his cheeks, our legs entwined together, he cleared his throat." That was wonderful, " Nik said.

"It was, " I pressed my lips to his once again." I'm sorry it took two years to even make a move, " I told him letting out a short laugh, he grinned and I couldn't help the butterflies that ran down my spines.

"It was worth the wait, " he told me." I love when you moan for me, " he smugly told me, I blushed looking away from his gaze he raised my head to look at him. "And when you say my name, " he pressed his lips to mine.

"You love that, " I whispered into his ear seductively biting his earlobe, he moaned into my ears.

"And when you call me baby, " He bit my button lips."Now that we've done this, I can't keep my hands off you, "

Oh, how right he was.

**

KLAUS P.O.V

A few hours later

Opening my eyes, I squinted it back close to the beaming of the bright afternoon sun, a smile grazed over mu lips as I remembered what happened a few hours ago, looking at the time, it was twelve p.m in the afternoon, I turned my head to Romeo who laid under the covers, naked, we had finally gotten to that phase of our relationship after two years, god, the sex what we did, it was... i couldn't describe it, having a sex with my mate, being intimate and doing all kinds of things god no words could describe how marvellous and magnificent it was. The way he moans my name and begs for more, the way I moaned his name and never wanted the moment to end. I took a few deep breaths before shifting in my position, I probed my elbow on the pillow watching how his chest rose and fell with each shallow breath he took, I traced my hands across the sexual mark I made on him, he was my mate and I wanted to mark him and find as one but I couldn't yet. I needed to break my curse in order for that to happen and I shall.

I caressed his cheeks, he stirred opening his eyes, I smiled into the whisky golden brown eyes." Hey, " he whispered softly, I smiled leaning my head on my elbow.

"Hii, " I grinned like a human hopelessly in love which I was, he was making me feel things I have never felt before." I loved what we did, " I told him caressing his cheeks.

"I did too, " He told me grinning helplessly, it was the same kind I had on my face."I feel like I was hit by a truck, " He grunted sitting up, I smirked at his words pulling him closer to me.

"I guess I did my job then, " I told him with a smirk and he laughed. His laugh, oh his laugh, it will be the death of me one day. then I would come back to life since I was an immortal hybrid. cursed hybrid.

"Don't be smug, " He raised his hand caressing his face, I stopped at the sight of a forming purple blotch on his wrist, I took his wrist in my hand.

"What is this?!" I questioned firmly, was he seriously hurting himself again? Bloody hell, how did I not notice this." Romeo, do not-"

"I wasn't hurting myself, " he pulled away from my hold getting out of bed, picking up the white robe, he wears it and takes a deep breath.

"I know when you lie, " I told him firmly also getting out of bed, I pulled him gently back onto the bed, he fell on top of me, I caressed his wrist." You need to stop hurting yourself, " I caressed his bruised wrist.

"I know, I'm sorry, " He whispered, I pulled him into a hug."I won't anymore, I promise, "

"I love you, know that, " I told him, he nodding pecking my lips.

"How about round four?!" He said I grinned pulling him closer to me. This was going to be fun.

[yellowdistress]

Hi there. I was wondering if you ever thought about writing what was Tony's reaction when Peter had his first crush (I'm assuming that's Liz) in the What We Are universe.

Here’s some of Tony’s thought processes before Peter’s homecoming! :D

Tony had been worried…after taking the suit.

Peter had come to this routine, a routine of being Spider-Man, of struggling to do things that a normal child would do…Peter had been up at night, had been having nightmares, as if the very thought of not being Spider-Man had shaken something deep within himself and had shredded him to pieces. Tony had held him that night, the night the boy had dreamed of drowning…And he had regretted his decision, but he had to stand by the punishment. At least Tony thought he did. He hadn’t grounded Peter many times in his life, he wasn’t good at it, and plus Peter was a good kid. He didn’t need punishment very often, but Tony figured almost sinking a ferry counted as acceptable cause.

Peter avoided home the next few days, to the point that Tony started demanding he be home by dinner because Tony had no clue where his kid was going if he didn’t have a suit and it made him…nervous. So there was that demand, just sinking Peter lower and lower.

“So I’m grounded from hanging out with Ned too?”

“We both known you’re not hanging out with Ned, you’re going somewhere to hide from me.”

Tony had felt bad about that one too.

Truth was though, after he had set that rule into place, they fell into some kind of normal routine. It was weird, having a kid that he didn’t have to worry was out being hurt by criminals. Peter went to school, went to Decathlon practice, hung out with his little friends and then came home. It was to the point they could even all have dinner together whenever Pepper wasn’t working late.It reminded Tony of life before  the secrets, before the drug scare, before Spider-Man. It was nice…it was mundane.

And then Peter came home one day with news: He had a date to the homecoming dance. With that Liz girl Tony had heard him talking about with Ned on a few occasions. It was funny, because at first all Tony could think was how it was a good opportunity to finally teach Peter how to tie a tie properly because the kid was fifteen and couldn’t do it.

It was the night before the dance that the silence had started to drift off between the two of them. Peter’s inability to make eye contact, as the past few days had been spent getting things together, and they had been forced to be in each others presence. Peter had eaten his dinner, not talking a whole lot, but Tony didn’t push. It was a miracle he was talking at all to him. Of course he figured all of this dug deeper than a usual punishment.

Tony contemplated on the fact that Peter was even old enough to go on a date. It was weird…because Peter had only just been four, at least it felt like that. Sometimes Tony looked back on their life and it felt like it was only a few quick snapshots, but then other times he observed years and years of trials and it felt longer. But Peter didn’t seem fifteen, and Tony often had to remind himself that he was eventually going to have to let Peter go out into the world one day. But it was hard, when Tony was vividly aware of what the world had to offer.

Oddly enough, Peter went to bed at a decent time now, since he wasn’t patrolling every night. He found his son, lying in bed, under the blankets with his eyes closed and the door was slightly opened. He could always tell when Peter was sleeping, genuinely doing so, because his breathing was so much deeper. Not anxious and skipping up and down, as if he couldn’t stand to be still. Peter was feigning, and Tony leaned against the doorway and questioned with his arms crossed over his chest, “Nervous about tomorrow?”

Peter kept his eyes shut a few more moments, before they fluttered opened. He didn’t move to sit up, but continued to lay there…

“That obvious?”

“You’ve been skirting around the subject for the past few days,” Tony shrugged, “I figured it was a possibility, first girlfriend and all.”

“She’s not my girlfriend,” That was when Peter started to sit up and Tony entered the room further, approaching the bed, “She’s just…she’s - “

“A special friend?”

“Dad,” Peter scolded, “No offense, but you come from a generation where people said stuff like ‘going steady’. This is…complicated.”

His dad raised an eyebrow, “You think I don’t know complicated relationships?”

Peter was silent just a moment and then relented, “Yeah, okay…probably.”

Tony chuckled. It was their first real conversation since the ferry boat. Tony put his hands in his pockets and he hummed, “You don’t have to be nervous, kid. You just gotta be yourself. Girls like the nerdy-shy types, trust me. She’ll find your babbling endearing.”

His son stared at him a few moments before his shoulders sunk a bit, “I dunno what school you went to Dad, but…I’m kind of a loser.”

It wasn’t anger that flared within Tony. More so frustration. Tony knew better, he knew there were kids at Peter’s school who gave him a hard time, he saw it written on people’s faces, like that kid in Tennessee. Tony had experienced his fair share of bullies, and his smart mouth usually got him clocked on a regular basis. Peter was different…He didn’t talk when those kids messed with him, Tony knew it. He reached out slowly, poking Peter’s forehead before he said, “If that were true, this pretty girl wouldn’t have told you yes.”

He didn’t miss the way Peter’s mouth turned upward slightly, his shoulders not so sunken in, as if the statement made sense to him. Peter nodded his head and Tony cleared his throat before he questioned, “So…We don’t need to have ‘the talk’ right?”

“Dad no! That’s - that’s gross!”

Tony cackled. He had already known the answer, but what good was being a dad if he couldn’t make his son squirm?

[thoughts-of-a-niqabi]

fevered reality

I got tested positive corona two days ago. The worst of it has passed al7amdulillah. I haven't been scared of it. It wasn't really different from a regular cold, just that it has gone around the whole family now and we've been trying our best to take care of one another when we're better.

What I wanted to write about though was how I've been emotionally. I had been anxious about missing university work because I actually like my classes and learning alongside my friends. I don't want to miss a single thing, and it's hard to catch up with the little amount of notes that gets passed on to me.

I'm calmer now though. That anxiety has somewhat passed. On the outside, one might say I seem very apathetic. Maybe upset or worried. Inwards, I feel almost numb. Not in a bad way really. It's....very hard to describe. I feel like I'm floating in water. Sometimes a sadness comes where I'm wondering why I feel so lonely. My chest feels constricted. My body has been going in and out of fever, but there are times where I feel like there's an ember inside me, coal burning after the fire has gone out. And the chill in my room from the air conditioner has my hair raised. I've looked at it for long minutes.

It's because of these stationary moments where everything feels still and I'm absorbing the world's energy makes me question whether I'm dreaming or not. Time feels so slow almost still, the period between the ticks of a clock seems to run forever.

I've been sleeping a lot and I've kept my room completely dark because my eyes, along with my other senses, have become incredibly sensitive. I drew away the curtains today. 7am white morning light filtered into my room, and with the chilled air directed on my back, I could almost mistaken myself to be living in a snowing country. Everything tranquil, cold and soft just exudes that lovely wintry atmosphere. I'm thankful I have the means to be able to pretend in such a hot country. Al7amdulillah.

[kassandra-lorelei]

Okay I'm fully obsessed with CC and Niles making a new HAPPY life in London, I Need to Know how Niles (or CC but probably Niles right?) tells Fran. Does he tell her immediately? Does he wait, to CC's angst because why wouldn't he tell her is he having doubts why is he not spilling the beans like the hasfrau he is? Does Fran find out somehow like 3 months after they've moved in together and takes a revenge flight to London just to murder Niles for not telling her? I Must Know

Here we are, my dude! Hot off the press! :-) 

@missbabcocks1

Two weeks. Nearly three, if she really thought about it. Yeah,it was nearly three – she could just about make out the date on the digitalclock on the nightstand.

They’d been together for all of that time (practicallyliving together, too, for all the time she’d spent in her own apartmentrecently!), and he still hadn’t said anything. He was on the phone with NannyFine every couple of days, sometimes more, and he hadn’t mentioned what wasgoing on between them once!

Was he afraid to? Was he having second thoughts? He couldn’thave been; it didn’t make any sense if he was. He was the most wonderful manshe’d ever been with, and he held nothing back in showing her how special shewas to him – he was affectionate, charming, fun, and a whole host of other things! Notto mention, he was easily the best she’d ever been to bed with. Living to serveothers had certainly honed his skills in that department!

So why the secrecy? That question had woken her early thatSaturday morning (rather than the usual sound of the London traffic starting toget bad), and she rolled over in bed to put her arm over him, holding him closeand pressing her cheek against his shoulder.

Even if she didn’t have the answer to her question, justholding him as she was felt soothing. She couldn’t believe they’d wasted somuch time in pretending to hate each other! Especially not when they could havebeen doing much more pleasant things…

She felt Niles start to stretch and yawn against her, andone of his hands reached back to help her hook her leg over his hip.

He nudged his head against hers, “Hm, you’re awake early…”

“How’d you know I wasn’t sleeping?” she asked in return, fingertipsbrushing the back of his palm, which was starting to rub her thigh.

He turned his eyes up towards her, a hint of a tired smirkon his face.

“No snoring shaking me out of the bed,” he answered, takinghis hand away from her leg and turning over so he was more on his back. “It’s adead giveaway.”

C.C. pretended to be put out by that, and she folded herarms some, “Sounds like someone doesn’t want a good morning kiss…!”

Niles slid his hand onto her hip and squeezed, “Will a potof coffee make up for it?”

She pretended to think about it, and got comfy underneaththe covers again, “Make it coffee and pancakes and you might have a deal.”

Niles chuckled, and got onto his elbows and knees so that hecould lean just inches from her face.

“Alright…” he said, puckering up. “But I’d like my paymentup-front please.”

Rolling her eyes, C.C. conceded him the kiss he was askingfor. She then watched him get up, throw on his dressing gown, and head out ofthe bedroom to make his way to the kitchen.

Within the hour, they were both enjoying hot coffee andpancakes from a tray, their pillows plumped up between the bed’s headboard andtheir backs.

“What were you doing awake so early, anyway?” Niles asked,taking a sip of his coffee. “Have a bad dream?”

C.C. frowned. She was getting better at talking about herfeelings, but it was still hard sometimes. Especially if she had nothing tofound her worries on.

“Not exactly,” she stabbed at her pancake, making a slice init with her fork but not attempting to cut it away to eat. “I just keptthinking about…well…”

“About what, love?”

He looked so concerned as he asked that, C.C. softened upinside. He really cared that much, didn’t he? He just wanted to make herproblem go away, if it was possible – there was no reason not to trust him withthis.

“You haven’t told the Sheffields about us,” she explained.

Niles looked at her blankly.

“No, not yet,” he said, cocking his head to one sideslightly. “Why?”

“I could ask you the same thing!” C.C. dropped her forkagainst her plate. “You’re usually such a yenta, I’d imagined you’d tell NannyFine right away!”

It was Niles’ turn to poke at his food, “Well, no – I wantedto wait a while.”

“What for?” she asked, probably sounding a little bit moredemanding than she needed or wanted to be.

He hesitated before answering, “I just…I wanted you to becomfortable with the idea of me telling them, before I did. I didn’t want you tothink I was making any kind of big plans about our relationship withoutdiscussing it with you.”

C.C. thought that over. That did make sense, and it touchedher again to know that he’d only been thinking of her. He was better than shedeserved, a lot of the time. But she was determined to make it up to him, andbe just as good to him in return.

“Oh…well, I suppose I do have to thank you for that,” shetook and gripped his hand, resting her head on his shoulder. “Knowing that theentire borough of Queens does not know my business is something of a relief.”

“I imagined it would be,” Niles said, kissing her hair andstroking her fingers with his thumb. “So, while we’re on the subject, did youwant to let the Sheffields know?”

“Well, they are still technically our closest friends. Theydo need to know eventually…” she thought aloud, before lifting her head upagain to smile at him. “Alright, let’s do it.”

“Okay,” he pecked her lips and started to smirk. “And whenwe’re done, we’ll call the Sheffields.”

C.C. swatted his arm playfully, “Oh, stop it!”

It took a few hours for it to be late enough to call. Giventhat New York was five hours behind London, it meant a lot of waiting around.So, to pass the time, they went to the restaurant for a while – Niles picked upa shift for someone who needed to leave early, and C.C. read through somecontracts for the next play her company was putting on. All the while, she wassupplied with small treats from a dessert cart that he kept rolling past with awink.

By the afternoon, they were back at Niles’ apartment,cuddled on the sofa, with the phone pressed to Niles’ ear as it rang all theway across the ocean.

But the wait was making C.C. anxious, “Why aren’t theypicking up?”

Niles rubbed her arm comfortingly, “It’s alright, sweetheart,just give them some time – their new butler isn’t as prompt as I was.”

She scoffed, and folded her arms, “At that rate we’ll die,leaving behind children and grandchildren, before he gets to the phone!”

It was a little while longer before the dial tone stopped,and she heard the buzz of someone’s voice at the other end of the line, whichstarted Niles back into action.

“Hello, Lawrence. It’s Niles,” he said. “Is either Mr or MrsSheffield at home?”

There was another small buzz.

“Thank you,” Niles smiled pleasantly, and took the phoneaway from his ear to tell her what was happening. “He’s going to fetch MrSheffield now.”

C.C. nodded, and after a couple of seconds, anotherdifferent-sounding buzz came from the phone.

“Hello, sir!” Niles greeted his former employer cheerfully.“How are things?”

He listened for a few minutes, occasionally nodding orinjecting the odd “Mm-hm” or “I see”. But eventually the talk came around inthe direction they were both hoping it would lead to, and Niles shot her asmile.

“With me? Well, things have been simply perfect here,” hesaid. “And, I, um…have someone here who might surprise you, who wants to sayhello…”

He passed the phone over, and C.C. didn’t waste time in speaking.

“Hello, Maxwell.”

In hindsight, she should have expected the shout of surprisethat followed.

“C.C.?!”

Wincing at the volume, she held the phone away from her earmomentarily, before returning to the conversation.

“Yes, Maxwell, it’s me,” she said. “Back from the dead, asit were.”

“Back from the…what on Earth are you doing in London?! InNiles’ apartment?!” Maxwell was so confused, and apparently so annoyed, that hecouldn’t help yelling. “You know what? Stick him back on, I need to have a wordor two with him about- Fran. Fran! Give me back the phone! Give it bac-”

The other producer’s voice trailed off, becoming faint, andit was replaced by a more nasal one.

“Miss Babcock!” Nanny Fine cried. “Why didn’t ya tell us yawent to London and that ya met up with Niles?! Didn’t ya want us to know? DidNiles not want us to know?! Y’know what, don’t go away, but put him back on – Igot a few words I wanna say to him!”

By some small miracle, the woman was silent after that,clearly waiting for Niles to answer.

C.C. held the phone out to him, “It’s for you.”

Niles hesitated, “Which one is it?”

“Probably whichever one is more irate at this current momentin time,” she replied, and pushed the phone into his hand. It sounded like there was another struggle for the mansion’s phone going on down the other end.

Sighing, Niles took the phone.

“Hello?” he asked, before settling in for what was probably goingto be a quite in-depth talk. “Yes, Mr Sheffield…No, no, I was not trying toleave anybody out of the loop…Yes, we were planning on telling you both…I don’tknow when…Whenever we both felt comfortable with it, most likely…Yes, we talkedabout it this morning, that’s why we phoned this afternoon…Alright. Well, ifyou think it’s best…I see. Very well, then. We’ll explain everything inperson…”

In person? Were the Sheffields coming to London? She hadn’theard any rumours about Maxwell Sheffield coming to the West End, so if theywere coming, it was purely for this!

She’d have to ask Niles, when the call was done with.

“Alright, I’ll let her know,” he said. “Thank you…Yes…Yes,we’ll see you then…Alright…Alright. Okay…Goodbye, Mrs Sheffield.”

C.C. looked quizzical, watching as he reached over to thenearest end table and put the phone down, “I thought you were talking toMaxwell?”

“I was, at first,” he replied, a little tiredly. “There wasanother small battle for the phone, so I ended up talking to both.”

“Okay,” she leaned into him, resting her head on hisshoulder. “So, I take it they’re coming over to give us the third degree?”

“As soon as they can get a flight out here. I agreed thatwe’d have dinner with them and straighten everything out face-to-face,” Nilesturned to look at her. “That is alright, isn’t it?”

“Yeah, it’s fine,” suddenly thinking, she straightened upand leaned forward with her elbows on her knees, looking around the room. “But,we have a minimum of twelve hours before they get here ‘cause I doubt NannyFine’ll take anything other than the first available flight, so we should startstraightening this place up a little bit.”

Niles made a thoughtful noise, and almost mirrored herposition. He still looked slightly more relaxed about the whole thing.

“Maybe a little, but there’s no need to go overboard,” hesaid, starting to rub her back. “We can take them to the restaurant for themeal.”

“Skimping on the housework, huh?” C.C. chuckled, smirking athim. “Typical.”

Niles’ hand slowed on her back, trailing playfully up anddown her spine, “I might be skimping, or I might just be very much aware thatwe’ll probably mess the place up again before they get here.”

She raised an eyebrow at him, “Every single room?”

“Well, you did say we have a minimum of twelve hours,” hegave her a suggestive look, leaning over to brush his lips against her ear. “Wantto mess the place up a little bit so that we have something to clean up for ourguests?”

C.C. felt a low rumble of a laugh in her throat, “Alwayslooking for an excuse to get a little dirty, aren’t you, Hazel?”

“You know me so well,” Niles kissed the patch of skin justbehind her ear.

He knew it drove her crazy, but C.C. knew she had to focus.They had guests coming in less than twenty-four hours, and she wanted to be prepared.And a part of being prepared was making sure they had clean surroundings, whichwas something Niles should have known about.

Not that she was going to reject him outright…

She stroked one finger down his cheek, all the way to hischest, “I’ll tell you what; if we get this place looking nice for theSheffields, you can help me clean up some other areas in the shower, later…”

Niles immediately got to his feet, “Where did we leave thepolish and the duster?”

C.C. laughed and grinned, joining him by standing, “That’smore like it…!”

They set to work, cleaning up little pieces when and wherethey could as quickly as possible. It was going to be really nice to see theSheffields again, even if there was going to be a lot of explaining to do, andthey only had a short amount of time before the New York couple potentiallycame knocking down the door.

When they were done – and she’d decide when they were done –that shower was going to be more inviting than ever…

[chickenstuffedwithmozzarella]

Hii!! I'm really sorry it took me so long, but here i am once again. You also had a busy week? Eveything okay? You babysitted your cousin again? Jajajajajaj noo. That would be very sad. Do not miss the concert because of that! Bring them ans then you'll see. I saw pics of one of his concerts were people had ballons and it looked wonderful! (1)

Hi love!!  Seriously, don’t worry about how long it takes you to answer me. I know your busy, and you have to study and all that, so… And yeah, last week was a bit busy, so out of normalcy, jajajja. Bc I never have things to do,lol.Yeah, I’ll bring the balloons 🎈 and I’ll see what I do. If it’s a success I’ll take a pic to show you,jajaja. That concert that Niall streamed the other day? They have balloons, jejejeje. It’s from where I got the idea 😅.

I know what a Diskman is, but i nevver had one. Anyway, i was not laughing of Andy and Lucas. I cannot judge since i have only heard one spng that was included in the Singstar Karaoke🤷. Wow, you had a good time in the 2000. You saw the most famous ones!! Ed was magical. His live was so good!! He was there all alonne and he pulled it off so well. Very lively😍 I almost cried when it ended (2)

Jajajajaaja, I know you weren’t laughing at it, jajajaja (but I totally was, lol, it’s so embarrassing). But I guess I was a teen and they were our own one direction,jajajajajajaja (no! Nada que ver!!) You think? I’ve always thought I didn’t go to a lot of concerts. I love music and concerts, so I guess I just wish I could go to a lot more,jajajajaa. Oh Ed… I’ve seen some videos of his concerts, and I want to go to one. He came to Spain around my birthday in 2014? And I wanted to go, but the place was very small and the tickets were sold out in a few minutes. I didn’t fight for them too much, either,jajaja. I’m happy you enjoyed it!!! That feel at the end of a concert is the best and the worst at the same time.

Noo! He is not disgusting. Poor baby. JAJAJAJAJ. You really managed to find a larrie at the concert? It could have been any fan, or even a het one, and you found the larrie? Lucky girl!! Yep. She is updated on everything. Only thing she doesnt follow is Harry’s suits, which is a pity because they are The Best and I dont even like fasion but still they make me want to chance my mind. I would love to see him at the Met Gala. He would be the king of the event. (3)

Oh, my baby, I love him, jajajaja, but he’s so weird… 🤣🤣🤣🤣.Not only did I find a larrie. I sold her my tickets,jajajaja. But lol, we were so afraid someone would hear us talking and say something to us 😅😅.Genuine question: how does she keep updated? I’m always missing things, and I live in tumblr, jajajaa. I don’t know how people can keep up with everything!    I’m always thinking I’m doing something wrong,jajajajaj.Harry’s suit are in another league. I admire him just for being brave enough to wear them. He would be the king at a Met Gala. But it bothers me that they always talk only about what women wear at those events. He should start walking red carpets to show the world how do you wear suits,jajajaja.

Is it later already? Can we talk about you being a witch? Yay!! You already started the tag. I now have a tag😎 i feel cool. (I’m jealous of your cousin-in-law (?) too. Uni would be much easier with that ability). I feel a bit stupid, but i cannot understand how they can say he is slow while at the same time he is doing all of that, but, Go little boy!! I’m cheering on you! (4)

Jajajja, we have this joke in my family where we say I’m half witch,jajaja. It’s just I’ve have night dreams sometimes, that predicted the future? Jajajajaj like once I had a dream about a girl how comes to the shop. In the dream, she was at the hospital,very ill. Well, I had been a few weeks I haven’t see her, and I told my sister about my dream. I didn’t thought anything about the dream. But that same evening that girl’s mom went to the shop. And my sister told her about my dream. And the mom told my sister that her daughter has been hospitalized for more than a week, very ill (but she was already recovered). My sister called me immediately after,jjajaja.Then, another night I dreamed with two crows. I was walking down an empty road, and they were flying behind me. One closer to me than the other. (Ufff, I still get anxious thinking about it). When I woke up I looked up the meaning of dreams, and find out that crows mean death. Well, the next month my brother-in-law’s granny died. And the next week my cousin. (See? One closer to me that’s the other…) I was so scared back then… And well, I’m always having those gut feelings, or whatever they are. Like last year I predicted the date when that baby girl I’ve talked to you about was going to be born,jajajaja. My sister is always asking me to see the future,jajajaja. But it’s something I don’t control,p (and don’t fully believe, jajajaa) eh eh!!! I just remember another thing!!! Jajajaja, fandom related, even. One day I was taking a nap, when Suddenly Louis came into my dream telling (about something he had bought for D*nielle😅): it’s Gucci! It’s Gucci!! Well, I woke up after that and opened tumblr. And there were new pics of Louis wearing that jumper with a bee and a fence phrase? And everyone was crazy screaming IT’S GUCCI!! IT’S GUCCI!!! 🤣🤣🤣🤣. And I was still half sleep thinking: I did it again…😅.

Yeah!! You ARE cool. And now have your own tag!!jajajjaWell, I don’t understand that about my cousin, tbh. And I don’t know how to explain it either. He knows (or memorizes) those things, but I’m not sure if he understands what they mean. But also then he has trouble understanding simple things. Like if he wants to eat something (chocolate) and you tell him that he has to eat dinner first, and then he can eat the chocolate, he doesn’t get it. And it’s not like other stubborn kids. It’s just he doesn’t understand what late means. Or he doesn’t like to have his hair cut, because he thinks it won’t ever grow out again. Same with cutting his nails. I’ve discovered now that he doesn’t mind having them filed out (Limadas), so I do his nails whenever he has them too long,jejeje.

Yes!! You really did manage to put rainbows on the cake. How smart and sneaky. And it looks so good😍. You did all that? JAJAJAJJAA Listen, i would trade my non existent masculinity for those marshmallows and i dont even like them. Thats how good they look. Yeah, nop. I’m not going to do that. We arent that close anymore, i probably wont see her for a couple of months and i dont think she would listen. She only sent it to me bcs “ tu eres feminista y toda esas tonterias” and wow. Okaaay. (5)

I’m pleased to inform you that that cake was a totally success,jajajaja. Someone saw while I was making it and asked me if it were for a gay parade? I just told him it was for a baby. Well, I make another similar one yesterday and he saw it again. And he started making rude comments about gays, and how they’re expanding like a disease, just because it’s a trend now to be gay. AND I CAN’T YELL AT HIM!!! 😡😡 I just sent him a very mean look (convine these 😒🤨 emojis and that was my face) and ignored him till he went away. I HATE THAT PEOPLE!! So ignorant. But they’re worse, bc the talk like they know what they’re talking about or like they are right. And NO! Aggggg.🙄“Tú eres feminista y todas esas tonterías” wow, why didn’t she ask you for more help!! She sounds so kind… (since this is written, I’m reading that how better I please,jejje. Maybe he’s kinder that how that sounds…). Well, there’s nothing worst that people how doesn’t want to learn and hear, so… sometimes it’s simpler to ignore them 😒.

I tried explaining it to my others friends though, pointing the flaws of the sentences and they just thought i was being picky. So…i tried, but they are not going to change their minds. Which, fair enough. Oh nooo. Poor kittens :( My examens are starting next week. But this week i have to finish some assignments and they are nightmares. I have cried many times this week because of them. I hate theeeem. (Not much to keep you informed but okay. I will). (6)

Uggggg, I don’t have any advice for you. I never went to uny, so 🤷🏻‍♀️ Take it the more easy you can, but it’s something you have to go through to reach you goal, so. Look at that,jejeje, your goal. And after all this work, summer is waiting for you, so, another thing to look for up,jajaja. Good luck with everything.

Also, that story was horrifying but useful i guess?? That CD sounds heavenly. I would buy it too (but like, in a year or so bcs thats how i work xd). It wasnt “tomorrow”. And still, no news. I’m waiting for some announcement. I just want something to change. I hope the future brings only good things to Lou. Pretty please? Yeeees. Liam was/is everywhere and i’m all in for that. L, you are doing amazing sweetie. 😍 (9 of 10)

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 YOU’RE SO FUNNY!!! Jajajajajaja.Yeah, it wasn’t tomorrow, nor yesterday, nor ever. I’m so impatient!!! Did you see he reappeared today?? He’s just so cute. He has had his hair cut again. I love his hair like that 😍😍. Please, let it be an announcement soon!! (I’ve read theories about him letting his contracts run out so he can free, and if that’s the case, I’m all for it, lol, even if I have to keep waiting for another year (please no)).Liam is truly everywhere. It makes me so happy. The other day the played For You in Pasapalabra (I don’t know if that’s a common thing, bc I don’t watch tele5). And yesterday they talked about him in all the programs at Los40. Mentioning his appearance at the festival. And the have tweeted something’s about him. And I don’t care if they use him as clock baiting, if they talk about him, I’m happy.

(Just read that you were working today. I reckon you didnt babysit your cousin. Oops. I never guess correctly). You went to the doctor? I dont want to pry, but are you okay? I hope you are good!!!💕 1 day until Niall show!!! It’s already thereeeee😱😱😱😍 Ooh. My weekend was dull, i studied and that was it. Thanks for asking!! What about you? Anything interesting? Have a good night!😘😘😘 (10)

Yeah, I had to work yesterday, AND babysit too, jajaja. But we have some spare space at the shops, so I took my cousin there, and between my mom and I , took care of him. So, yes, you were correct. Your memory is better than mine (a lot better).Yeah, I went to the doctor. Everything is okay, thanks for asking,jeeje. They just have to check my lungs and heart for some surgery I want/need to take (but I don’t talk about it yet, jejeje, bc I don’t want to jinx my luck,jejjje).TOMORROW I’LL BE SEEING NIALL!!!!!! I CAN’T BELIEVE IT!!!! How is your sister doing???? Jajajjajaja I’m so nervous/excited!!!! Jekjdnffieornvonerv I did my nails this morning, and of course, I got and Irish flag on one of them,jajajaja.. I can’t wait anymoreeeeee. I hope I can take good videos,jajaja, and that we’re close enough to see his nostrils,🤣🤣🤣🤣.The most interesting thing of my week haven’t happened yet,jajaja. I’ll tell you everything on Sunday (bc Souter day I’ll be dead and have to work 😩😩😩).Tell your sister to have the time of her life. And ask her to FaceTime you for a bit so can see Niall at least!!(still wishing you could go too. Another time, I guess).Have a good day/weekend/week. And don’t stress yourself about answering.

Pd: for how long do you have exams? I hope it isn’t too long. Are they finals? (I know nothing about this 😅)