#but someones uncle friend family boss will still cry that its all fake and that allende had the country in shambles or that

[remicilline]

they (finally) aired on tv a documentary just this week with years of research re: the involvement of nixon and the cia prior the elections—and later coup when Allende was elected

[hezuart]

Evan Magne add. Info

Hey ya’ll! @blueraggdollcat asked me for more info on Evan and his relationships with others, so I thought I’d post my answers publicly for those who are interested!

~

Vaggie acts like a second sister / borderline mother to him at times. They're very fond of each other, Evan is glad Charlie found someone that makes her happy, unlike her ex boyfriend Seviathan

Evan used to get really dirty and laugh at Niffty's ferocious cleaning as a child, but as he aged he began to clean up after himself and make sure he's well dressed and making as less of a mess as possible which gives Niffty so much relief. Niffty also finds him really cute, totally got the face of a boyband mascot. He’s flattered, but won’t be joining a band any time soon lol. (Niffty also sorta turned him into a clean freak like herself...) 

Husker likes Evan. He used to give him milk and leave him in charge of the bar as a baby. As he aged, Husk now serves him alcohol when he requests it and has utmost trust in him. The two have a lot of friendly conversation on warm evening nights after a long, tiresome day

Angel and Evan are best bros. Evan is sort of gender-fluid when it comes to clothing like his sister. Angel is his opportunity to explore femininity and just have a chaotic teenage life he otherwise wouldn't be allowed to have as the Prince of Hell. The two gossip and Evan attends many of Angel's shows. He always gets free tickets

Evan is fascinated with Sir Pentious' tech. As a baby, he would mess around with all the machines which would drive Pentious nuts. All the egg bois LOVED having Evan around, just cooing at them. Sir Pentious was hinted at having a son, so even though he acts annoyed at Evan at first, he quickly comes to cherish the kid and have very awkward dad-humor or forced bonding time with him. As Evan grows, Sir Pentious feels the hollow place in his heart fill up a little, remembering fatherhood and slowly understanding children / the youth a bit more. Sir Pentious is the awkward uncle to Evan. They like eachother despite the awkwardness. 

Any friend of Angel's is a friend of hers. Cherri Bomb likes Evan, but he can't exactly say the same about her. Her spunky style and need to explode things unnerve him a bit. He gets along with her, but she tests his patience and makes him very upset / nervous, just tossing bombs and exploding things left and right. He’d probably snap, yell himself hoarse at her as she laughs and teases him. He comes home, his hair a mess, his eyes wide with bags under them, and his pristine clothing covered in soot. It's not a happy sight... 

Evan's relationship with "Baxter" would be somewhat similar to Sir Pentious. WHile Evan is fascinated with technology, its not exactly his cup of tea. He likes to hear about it, but he would never actively participate. He sees Baxter as a type of brother to him, one that locks himself away in his room and only comes out if he needs something. They respect eachother's spaces and the two have a silent agreement about it.

Also, I forgot Alastor- Alastor has always been like an Uncle to Evan. He's the reason Evan is always smiling. He learned manipulation tactics and even has a great love for swing music all because of Alastor's influence. Alastor also loves to see him and Charlie. He almost thinks of the two as his own. Because the two are always smiling, they have a silent understanding that... things can be very fake. that there are many insecurities beneath, waiting to crawl their way out of their throats. It's hard work, always having to put up a front and be cruel. So being at the hotel is such a relief to them. Being around eachother... they let their smiles calm a bit. They for once smile genuinely, just being around eachother.

~~

Away from his friends and the Hotel, when it comes to the Overlords, he acts much like his father or mother would. He is cold, calculating, and confident. Even as a baby, he knew better than to act up in front of them. He always needed to keep up appearances for the sake of his family name and reputation.

He'd even threaten some of the Overlords with war if they ever crossed the line, and he damn well means it. Luckily it rarely ever comes to that. Lucifer is proud his son is such a well-composed demon like himself. But Evan doesn't like the favoritism. Lucifer should love Charlie too, but he doesn't, and for that, Evan holds a secret grudge against his father for it.

When it comes to the Helluva Boss characters...

Stolas is someone Evan would be fond of. Stolas is no doubt an evil overlord, but he has a daughter, and can actually be quite sweet to those in his immediate circle. Stolas thinks Evan is the spitting image of his parents and compliments his stature and confidence. He has utmost respect for Evan and surprisingly likes Charlie quite a bit too. "I have a daughter myself, you see. They can be quite a handful, but you can't help but love them all the same." Evan has great respect for Stolas despite his wealth and questionable business practices. Sometimes they bump into eachother during outings or at weird theme parks. They're always happy to exchange "hellos"!

I don't see Evan really meeting or interacting with many of the IMP characters, however..

It's very likely that Evan would bump into Blitzo and Stolas on an outing. Evan isn't exactly clear whether Stolas has a wife or not despite having a daughter, and innocently asks one day "Is this your boyfriend?" To which the two sputter embarrassed and exasperated. Firm denial, teasing confirmation, some bickering later... Evan just watches the two and somehow gets the gist that they'e good friends. Blitzo is quite comical, and his energy comes across as a theater kid, much like his sister. Evan wouldn't interact a whole lot with Blitzo, they'd never be more than acquaintances, but he thinks its cute Stolas can have such a goofy little friend.

Evan wouldn't interact with Loona at all. They'd both just.. sit there, typing away at their phones with boredom. They're both ... for some weird reason... irritated at eachother's presence. But as long as the other keeps their mouth shut and eyes trained on their phone, the cold war between them will remain just that: cold. (Evan might be a little more of a cat person than a dog person....) 

Evan would think Millie is a sweet little thing. Quite surprised she could be such a murder machine. He would compliment Moxxie's music, thinking their relationship is shockingly the most healthy in all of hell. I don't think they'd have much interaction beyond that.

Annndddd something else about Evan: a good portion of his personality is on lockdown. He acts all smiley, friendly, chivalrous, and dainty. Always striving for perfection in both his posture and personality. Of course, when in front of powerful demons he also has to act like a force to be reckoned with. While he does get his escape with the staff at the hotel, the pressure of being the prince of hell gets to him. He sometimes gets so exhausted and stressed. He might accidentally lash out at others because of it, especially his sister, who he is the most comfortable letting his guard down. The two rarely, but sometimes curl up, just holding one another as they cry.

Evan's relationship with his sister may seem perfect, but they do bicker sometimes. They do disagree sometimes. Evan doesn't always like his sister's childish attitude in certain situations, and Charlie doesn't like Evan's mightier-than-thou attitude either. But they are still very good to eachother. Its sorta just.. them against the world. They were born in hell. Evan has accepted the fact that he's a demon, but he knows his sister is different. He knows she doesn't belong here. That makes him sad. It shows his bad side a little. He almost wants to force Charlie to stay, stay in Hell with him. So she can't leave.... leave him there alone. Go somewhere else... somewhere better. It's a struggle. He feels slight guilt over it, but his obsession only drives forth his determination more. He wouldn't sabotage the hotel, but he would be damned if he ever let Charlie leave. I doubt Charlie would want to leave him, but Evan knows there are nights that Charlie wants to abandon it all from the stress. He knows she's the one who actually wants to go to heaven. It's the place she deserves to be. But ...

"Oh sister mine... please allow me a little selfishness. You don't belong here, I know. But I can't ever .... bare to let you leave.... "

[shadowofmytime]

>> some of my absolute favorites ! like and reblog if you save and enjoy ! happy reading and give some kudos to these amazing writers ! always feel free to send me some of your favorites ! ! <<

>> There is a bit so for your convenience they are in alphabetical order ! The ‘s’s are some of my all-time favorites ! ! <<

>> min yoongi x park jimin <<

All the seasons of your love - 5k+ [college au]

The movement in the library was still slow in the first week, so Yoongi could easily remember the few people who came by. That's why he pays so much attention to a certain dark-haired freshman who walks in on a Wednesday afternoon - or at least that's what he tells himself. He goes over to the front counter and asks Yoongi for directions to the Economy 101 session and, God, his voice is as sweet as his eye-smile.

Or how librarian Yoongi fell head over heels for cute freshman Park Jimin who, unfortunately, was very much straight - or so Yoongi thought.

Bon Voyage - 47.9+ [tourist! au]

Yoongi was meant to be taking the trip of a lifetime with his boyfriend. But now he's in Paris, alone and miserable. That is until he collides - quite literally - with one Park Jimin.

Boys who talk shit - 26k+ [college au]

When Yoongi enrolled in BTS (aka Boys who Talk Shit) Boarding School, he wasn't really expecting to be the only 'straight' (to be read sarcastically) guy in a room of seven geniuses (aka children aged five to ten, honestly). Plus four pet spiders. Yes, plural.

Chaotic episodes in A Place of Love and War, where Yoongi learns all about True Love via Park Jimin, Music and Marriage. Sort of. Brain bleach and earplugs are strongly recommended.

Conflicting arrangement - 162k+ [fake boyfriend au]

"Absolutely not," Yoongi deadpanned. "Namjoon-ah. I value you as a friend, and I think I'd even go as far as to say that you're my best friend, but absolutely fucking not."

"You owe me," Namjoon pleaded. "Come on, Yoongi, it's not a big deal."

"Your boyfriend's best friend's best friend needs a fake boyfriend to come out to his family this Chuseok, all the way in fucking Busan," Yoongi repeated drily without pause, making Namjoon wince. He flipped a page of his textbook, picking up his highlighter. "Not a big deal, Namjoon. Amazing."

Cotton Candy - 240k [high school rock band]

"He could get used to sitting next to Yoongi like this. To have him around. To have the band around. To smile and feel happy. To see Yoongi sitting in front of an instrument and having him play just for him.

'If this was my happy ending,' Jimin thinks, resisting the urge to lean his head on Yoongi's shoulder, 'if I wasn't who I am, I'd just let you have me whenever you want. You could have me anytime.'"

As spring turns into summer, school band Cotton Candy unexpectedly loses its singer and the members are forced to look for a new vocalist. Six boys find one in the form of the promiscuous pink-haired boy Park Jimin who makes a home in their hearts and finally finds a place he belongs

Daegu drift - 53k+ [motorcyclist / playboy au]

Jimin stops in Daegu for a big motor show and gets caught up with the locals. Specifically one Min Yoongi.

Sneak Peek:

Yoongi has his arms folded as he stares Jimin down.

“Are you going to join the rally, or not?”

Jimin takes his time answering because he likes the way Yoongi is looking at him. “Sure. I guess it could be fun. But you do realize none of you have a chance against a Bugatti, right?”

“It’s not the car that wins the race,” the other man says. “It’s the driver. You could have the fastest, best-equipped car in the goddamn universe, but if you’re a shit driver, it doesn’t make a difference.”

Goodbye from lonely - 65k+ [uncle yoongi!]

Park Jimin works two jobs that he loves and is going to college to get his teaching degree.

Min Yoongi is a personal assistant who hates his job and spits in his boss' coffee every day.

Kim Taehyung has been infatuated with his clueless co-worker for the better part of a year.

Jeon Jeongguk has a three-year-old daughter that he'd do anything for.

Somehow the tiny human brings them all together.

Or

Tae is in love with Kookie -> Kookie's daughter takes Jimin's ballet class -> Yoongi is Kookie's stepbrother -> Jimin and Yoongi meet because of Kookie's daughter.

In your eyes (it’s where I wanna be) - 5.5k [coffee shop! au]

Jimin pauses with his marker inches away from the cup, because — is he really going to do this? Isn’t it a bit old-fashioned to write something flirty on a coffee cup? But no matter what his churning gut says about the danger and what the hell are you doing do you want to die, this guy is — with no better way to put it — totally Jimin’s Type with a capital T.

(Or: Jimin accidentally starts a nickname war with the cute blonde who likes his coffee way too bitter.)

Inked flowers - 6.4k [tattoo artist / florist au]

Something stopped him. A sound of a piano. He looked around and saw a light coming from the window on the other side of the street. On the third floor was an open window. A light and the sorrowful sound of a piano flew out of the room. Jimin looked closer and saw a figure or at least a top of someone's head.

The melody was so sad and sorrowful that Jimin wanted to cry. He started thinking, what could possibly go inside that person’s head? What were they thinking? Jimin just hoped that they weren’t sad and alone.

(let me see you) get high then low - 4k+ [photographer/model au]

"The light-haired model is the kind that fascinates Yoongi, and at the same time, he prefers to steer away from. He's all smiles and flowers, drawing you in with his cuteness until he's not anymore. Suddenly, he’s something else entirely; he's that false calm, the ocean that looks smooth on the surface but will drag you down to its depths if you dare to touch it."

or

Min Yoongi works in a photography studio with some (very questionable) friends that can't get any work properly done without making a bit of a fuss.

Park Jimin is a model handcuffed against his will and bored. Also a little bit horny, maybe.

Math Tutor - 11.7k [bad boy! yoongi]

Min Yoongi is the school's resident Bad Boy™. He's covered in tattoos, is pierced, curses like a sailor, smokes like crazy, doesn't give a shit about anything, possesses a hot temper that has people steering clear of him, and is desperately in love with Park Jimin, the adorable math nerd. When Jimin is tasked with tutoring Yoongi in math, who is in danger of failing the class and being held back a year, both boys are hesitant. Yoongi because he can't think straight around the boy with startling red hair, and Jimin because Yoongi is scary as hell and looks like he can easily kill someone. Gradually, though, the two grow closer, and Jimin finds that Yoongi is nothing like how he'd imagined.

Maybe I hate you can be our always - 35.9k [enemies to lovers]

When Yoongi thinks about it, really gives it genuine thought, it's possible that Park Jimin isn't the worst person in the world.

//

(Or, Yoongi and Jimin get off on the wrong foot.)

Ode to yoonmin - 4k+ [texting]

yoongi and jimin are in very much in love but they're the only ones who don't know it

OR

chat fic with a bunch of bad jokes and memes ¯\_(ツ)_/

Out of my system - 101.6k+ [one night stand]

Yoongi likes one night stands and he understands how they work. What he doesn’t understand, however, is how he ended up in bed with a probably-not-legal kid crying in his arms about his broken heart, because he’s pretty sure (and correct him if he’s wrong) that a babysitting job was not what he was looking for when he went to the opening of his friend’s new club

Standing on the brink of 376 - 42.9k+ [street racing]

When Taehyung woke him up at three AM to go to a street race—an illegal one, no less—claiming it would help his social anxiety, Jimin never actually expected it to do much for him, except maybe make him cry hysterically. He found that he really wasn't too far off-kilter with that assumption, but it was only after he'd suffered through countless bouts of insecurity that he realized, hidden behind each stuttered breath, every inevitable tear, every spark of unavoidable fear, and even the customary cloud of cigarette smoke itself, lay a tremendous amount of affection for a certain platinum haired street racer that he can't even begin to justify. But when his opinion of fact, fate, and even life itself continues to blur with each push of the gas pedal, he thinks he just might be able to forgive himself for falling in love with a criminal, when the nonsensical moonshine of the present mutes the anxiety that had been a constant within his heart up until this November.

Strawberry lube - 82.7k+ [college au]

Yoongi remembers little to nothing of their crazy drunken night out. But of two things he's absolutely sure, one: he's not gay, two: he just slept with Park Jimin

The Paradiso Lounge - 192k+ [photographer/stripper au]

“Do I have to pay you for that service?”

This isn’t a dream (let me love you) - 26k+ [highschool au]

As captain of his high school’s basketball team, Min Yoongi dedicated all of his attention to his team and their games. His focus on the game never waned, not once for anything or anyone.

Well, until head cheerleader Park Jimin flashed his abs during a solo cheer and made him fuck up his shot

Trying to Behave (but you know we never learned how) - 329k+ [non-idol! au]

It's been years since Yoongi's last seen him and the younger boy is a shell of his former self in a way that makes his heart twist in his chest. And yet, after all this time and countless days of convincing himself to let him go, he's still unconditionally, head over heels in love with Park Jimin.

(Jimin and Yoongi grow up together.)

Valentino Summers - 657k+ [‘80s gangsters]

Whether or not Jimin was smuggling drugs really didn’t matter. He was hustling, and these days that was all there was to it.

Hustle and survive or struggle and die.

Y/N masterlist  << check it out !! xoxo

[phanemotrash]

All of them. All 100. Do it. I dare you.

aha, I’ve missed when we’ve done this, good friend. *cracks knuckles*

1 - Who was the last person you texted?

my boss

2 - When is your birthday?

may 9th

3 - Who do you want to be with right now?

my crush

4 - What sports do you play?

does internet surfing count?

5 - Who is the first person in your contacts?

one of my aunts

6 - What is your favorite song as of the moment?

Fixation by Emma Blackery

7 - If you were stranded on an island, who do you wish to be with?

my crush *wiggles eyebrows* ;)

8 - What do you feel right now?

numb

9 - What chocolate is your favorite?

ALL THE CHOCOLATE

10 - How many boyfriends/girlfriends did you have?

none, and I’ve never had a real one

11 - Why did you create a Tumblr account?

wanted a place to put things I couldn’t tell/show my parents

12 - Who is your favorite blogger?

the bitch who asked me this, @greenmooneyes

13 - Where do you want to be right now?

with my crush, where else?

14 - What do you want to be in the future?

in a stable, comfortable situation

15 - When was the last time you cried? Why?

sometime in the last few days, I was pissed at my parents for something they do  a lot

16 - Are you happy?

50% of the time

17 - Who do you miss?

my family who live on the other side of the country, and the bitch who sent this ask

18 - If you were given a chance, would you like to have a different life?

no, every life has its struggles, so I’d rather deal with the ones in this life since I know best how to deal with them

19 - What was the best thing you were given?

friendship

20 - Who was the last person who called you?

my grandfather

21 - What is your favorite dish?

don’t have one, but I LOVE comfort food

22 - Who is your bestfriend?

the bitch who asked this (I already tagged her above)

23 - What is your biggest regret?

don’t have any

24 - Have you ever cheated on your partner?

nope, and I hope I never will (can’t say I won’t cause you never know what’ll happen)

25 - Who do you spend crazy moments with?

myself. I’m usually by myself

26 - Name someone pretty.

@roseyygf I think she’s very pretty

27 - Who was the last person you hugged?

my brother

28 - What kind of music do you listen to?

various kinds, can’t pin one down

29 - Are you over your past?

mostly, the only thing that I can’t get over is my abusive birth-mother and how she has treated me and my sister all our lives

30 - Who is the last person in your contacts?

My uncle

31 - What kind of person do you want to date?

my crush, who else?

In seriousness, someone who is kind, funny, caring, respects me, and likes most of the same things I do. (My crush fits this soooo well, but has a girlfriend.)

32 - Do you have troubles sleeping at night?

Yes. Especially when I could be looking at dank memes instead of trying to sleep.

33 - From whom was the last text message you received?

My boss

34 - What do you prefer, jeans or skirt?

J E A N S!!!!!

35 - How’s your heart?

hurting, but fine

36 - Did you ever have a girlfriend/boyfriend whose name starts with a “J”?

somewhat, I had a bf who did, but I don’t think that relationship counts as a real one for reasons I’d rather not discuss.

37 - Do you like someone as of the moment?

YESSSSSS! (and they are all I want to talk about lately. I’m even annoying myself)

38 - What would you want to say to your latest ex-boyfriend/ex-girlfriend?

Hey, why did we have a fake relationship? We were better as friends, and you hated me after we faked a relationship to get your sister to shut up, but never said why.

39 - Do you have any phobias?

fear of holes (can’t remember the specific word)

40 - Did you try to change for a person?

yes, sort of. The only time I change for a person is when I hurt them in some way, so I change so I never hurt anyone else in that way again

41 - What’s the nicest thing have you given to someone?

I have no clue

42 - Would you go back to your previous relationship?

Nope! All my previous relationships were fake or not real relationships. Like, either pretending to be a couple, or we were a couple but certain reasons make it a not real relationship.

43 - Are you in a good or bad mood?

neutral

44 - Name someone you can’t live without.

The bitch who sent this ask

45 - Describe your dream date.

being on a date with my crush

46 - Describe your dream wedding.

who said I wanted to get married?

If I did, it would be outside, in winter while it’s snowing

47 - How many roses did you receive last Valentine’s?

none, no one sends me valentine’s shit (except my best friend [see above])

48 - Have you ever been kissed?

not a “real tongue kiss”, but one without tongue, yes, and that was only for a fake relationship to make it seem like it was real

49 - How long is your longest relationship?

two weeks

50 - Do you regret your past?

nope

51 - Can you do something stupid for someone else?

depends on what I’m doing, why I’m doing it, and who I’m doing it for

52 - Have you ever cried over someone?

yup, the first girl I loved. I cried because I emotionally hurt her without realizing, and I felt like a piece of shit for what I did

53 - Do you have a grudge against anyone?

birth-mother, no one else

54 - Are you a crybaby?

according to my parents yes, but most of the time, no

55 - Do people praise you for your looks?

not really, I’m mostly praised for ‘how smart I am’

56 - Did you fall for someone you shouldn’t?

yes, only reason I shouldn’t have is cause she was straight, and I knew it.

57 - Have you ever done something bad but you don’t regret?

yes, hurting the girl I loved. I regretted it for years until I accepted that I did a horrible thing, that I learned from it, and just got sick and tired of crying myself to sleep over what I did. I shouldn’t have done that, but I got sick of regretting something years after it happened.

58 - Do you like getting hurt?

physically, in certain ways, yes ;)

59 - Does anyone hate you?

probably

60 - Did you slap anyone whose name starts with an “R”?

myself, yes, when I need to focus but can’t (happens frequently). other than that, no

61 - What hair color do you prefer?

I have no preference 

62 - If you can change anything about yourself, what is it?

being able to analyze my words and actions better so I don’t hurt anyone ever again

63 - Do you love someone as of the moment?

no, I do have a crush though

64 - Have you ever thought of killing yourself?

I used to, but not anymore.

65 - Do you have issues with somebody in your school?

no

66 - Can you live without internet?

yes

67 - What’s the song that remind you of your special someone?

Fixation by Emma Blackery, Helpless from Hamilton, Satisfied from Hamilton, Would You Be So Kind by Dodie Clark, Absolutely Smitten by Dodie Clark

68 - Are you good at holding back your tears?

extremely, it’s scary

69 - Are you a crybaby?

you already asked this

70 - Have you ever experienced being hysterical?

no

71 - Are you a KPOP fan?

not really, but I have yet to check it out

72 - Do you study hard?

yes ;)

in seriousness, only when an assignment is due

73 - Have you ever sacrificed something important to you for someone you love?

no

74 - Did you ever had a kiss under the moonlight?

no

also, *have you ever had a kiss, or, *did you ever have a kiss (I copied this directly from the post)

75 - Have you ever ridden a boat?

yes

76 - Did you have an accident last year?

no

77 - What kind of person are you?

hmm, honest, don’t give a fuck what people think about me, happy being single, happy being just friends with my crush, 50% happy

78 - Have you ever thought of killing someone?

yes, but even when I thought about it, and still to this day, would never do it.

79 - Have you ever been jealous?

yes

80 - How can you prove your love to someone?

no idea

81 - What are you thinking right now?

why did I listen to this bitch and answer every one of these questions? my fingers hurt

82 - Who is the 6th person in your contacts?

my step mom

83 - Do you have any memories you want to erase?

yes, but I shouldn’t erase them because they helped me learn shit

84 - Have you been hurt so bad that you can’t find words to explain how you feel?

yes

85 - Did you ever badmouth someone?

I have, but I’ve been trying to stop doing that, no matter what the person has done to me

86 - Have you ever had an argument with someone?

yes, I start arguments with my best friend [see above] on purpose

87 - Do you have trust issues?

somewhat

88 - Are you broken-hearted?

no, I repaired my broken heart years ago

89 - Who’s the person who first comes to your mind when someone mentions “love”?

my crush, ONLY CAUSE 3 PEOPLE HAVE TRIED TELLING ME I’M IN LOVE WITH THEM WHEN IT’S JUST A CRUSH

90 - Do you think all the pain is worth it?

yes

91 - Do you believe in the phrase “If it’s meant to be, it will be”?

yes

92 - Who do you want to marry?

who said I want to get married?

93 - Do you believe in destiny?

somewhat

94 - Have you ever thought “I already found my soulmate”?

no

95 - How do you look right now?

awesome

96 - Do you believe that first true love never dies?

no, love can die, love can come in phases, love is fucking weird as hell

97 - Have you found your true love?

no

98 - What should you be doing right now?

watching YouTube, BUT SOMEONE SENT THIS ASK

99 - Name one of your ex-boyfriends/ex-girlfriends.

Jeremy, if that even counted as a relationship

100 - Did you ever feel like you’re not good enough?

all the damn time.

[lissaremade]

alek’s backstory

i post a lot about my dnd character, alek, so here’s his entire backstory up until the very end of the campaign

it’s gonna be ONE HELL of a long read because A LOT has happened over the course of his backstory and the campaign, so heads up this will be EXTRAORDINARILY TEXT HEAVY

this will be focused on alek’s arc for the most part! the campaign has a lot more going on in it, lots of character arcs, lots of small details and lots of worldbuilding.

(PICTURED: the first ever reference i drew of alek, drawn over a year ago)

alek desona was the first dnd character i ever made. he’s a firesoul genasi sorcerer who’s lawful neutral. he has four siblings: two older brothers (arun and ciro) and one younger sister (luce). his parents are named roshan and kamara; they the leaders of the genasi clan they live in. 

(PICTURED: my very first reference of milo)

milo soryn, another oc of mine, has a backstory very much intertwined with alek’s. the same age as alek, and an only child, his parents were merchants who traveled around the continent selling goods. about once a month they stopped by alek’s community, which is how the two met at a pretty early age. 

milo and alek are pretty much the childhood friends into lovers trope. alek considers milo his closest and most trusted friend, and milo feels the same.

when they were 18, milo was drafted into a war against a neighboring country full of dwarves. not wanting milo to go alone, alek followed him to ensure he stayed safe.

they fought together as foot soldiers until they were both 22, when milo was killed in combat, protecting alek from an oncoming attack. alek lost control of his powers after being overcome by grief, and razed the entire battlefield, leaving behind nothing but himself and a broken sword - the very sword used to kill milo. 

ashamed, he immediately fled the scene, never looking back. 

he traveled around for a bit before running into two half-elf men called rufus and roy at the bees and brambles tavern. there, he met the people who he would travel with for the course of the campaign. they were assigned a mission to retrieve an artifact from none other than a goblin brothel. 

(PICTURED: art by @kay-o of, from left to right, rosamythe, daegal and alek)

other player characters in the campaign include:

daegal, a tiefling ranger

rosamythe, a half elf cleric

batholomew “spudman”, a human bard

khepri, a dragonborn rogue

after some shenanigans in the brothel, and running into a mysterious cultist named miss princey, they manage to retrieve the artifact. but, are forced to fight their way out. alek gets the finishing blow on the boss, but after the fight ends miss princey, the cultist, murders a goblin named bluechest seemingly in cold blood, claiming he had betrayed the cult. 

our cleric, rosamythe, who was drunk at the time, decided to immediately enact revenge by killing miss princey, sending her body hurtling off a cliff. a small puff of white energy left her body as it fell, rising into the air. we thought nothing of this, until we were receiving our promised payment when everything went black.

and that was the story of how we survived the ending of our first world.

(the rest will be VERY shortened to save space btw)

basically, we were tasked with finding and killing the guardians of the world at first, after running into a guardian posing as the god deneir and basically brainwashing his followers. we were able to kill him because spudman impulsively killed an old lady who told him he had to kill her because she wasn’t supposed to exist. (we later found out that the only way to kill a guardian is to first kill someone who isn’t supposed to exist)

daegal’s brother/uncle (it’s complicated) waegal appeared on behalf of daeg’s demon grandfather, varius. he started to fuck shit up in the capital, pretty much brainwashing people by telling them everything was fake and nothing was actually real. 

along the way, shortly after arriving at the capital and shortly before shit started hitting the fan, alek was turned into an ash genasi by some wind elementals because we tried to threaten the captain of a ship who was part of an underground organization. (we later joined said organization but that’s another story)

after killing the guardian, we decided to follow a map alek received in a special christmas one-shot where we were transported to the town of christmas to help restore holiday cheer. the map provided insight to a way alek might be able to become a fire genasi again.

while en route, waegal appeared again in front of the ship. after provoking him, he cast fireball on the ship. alek realized his map was still inside the cabin of the ship, so he ran for it at the last minute. while he was running, time slowed down for him and he heard a voice inside his head asking him if he could have one wish, what would it be?

so he responded “for things to go back to the way they were in the past.”

CUE SAD ALEK ONE-SHOT THAT MADE ME CRY A LOT

alek was suddenly transported back to his childhood home. he was the same age, however, and all his siblings appeared to have aged accordingly as well. he found out milo was coming around to visit. 

it turns out that there was a surprise - milo’s family would be staying in the town, meaning they could spend all their time together. something was fishy about this however. and upon confronting milo about the strangeness of the circumstance, milo got a little aggressive. 

eventually, this escalated and it became very clear that something wasn’t right here. carrying a fire orb alek needed to return back to the “real” world, milo turned into a wind genasi, and alek was forced to fight him. 

not wanting to harm him, alek turned invisible and tried to grab it from him. (i’m pretty sure i rolled a 2 and our dm rolled a 1 when i tried to do this lmao)

alek was forced to come to terms with the fact that he couldn’t un-do the past, and that milo was gone for good. and by turning his back on this fantasy world, he was accepting that milo was gone and letting go of the past. i cried a lot during this whole encounter ok

eventually, he found out that this was all the doing of a genie who had granted alek’s wish to go back to the way things were. the version of milo was a guardian, and alek was able to defeat it because the genie ceased to exist (since genies aren’t supposed to exist in the world)

/END SAD ALEK ONE-SHOT THAT MADE ME CRY A LOT

upon returning to the real world, we traveled through the desert, following the map alek received. we came across a phoenix namyed alcatraz who turned out to be the ancestor of all genasi. (in our campaign, genies aren’t the source of all genasi, but phoenix are) 

by using the last of his power as well as the fire orb milo had held (which he still had when he woke up), alek was turned back into a spicy fire boy.

we fled the desert after a bunch of demons appeared from the sky, and after some travel through a forest where daegal and rosamythe were put on the spot for backstory stuff (we found out daegal killed rosamythe’s dad under the influence of varius, his demon grandpa) we were forced to fight varius. eventually the final blow was dealt by some mysterious beings who appeared from the sky. 

with varius gone, we moved on and eventually ran into none other than aboran, the town we appeared in. except we were in the old world, and aboran had previously been in the new world. the two worlds were somehow merging.

we had to rescue our half dead npc son, lance, from a dragon who hoards souls. during the fight with the dragon, milo’s soul, which was taken by the dragon and in its lair, helped us out A LOT by inflicting an exponential amount of damage on the dragon and then pulling a mipha’s grace on alek by reviving him to 1hp when he got ko’d by the dragon’s last desperate attack

after that shit REALLY started hitting the fan, as the world around us began to end in itself. robots invaded, and all the people who had survived the end of the original world began becoming possessed by the god rahat, who we found out had created the very world we were in but was unhappy because we all forgot about him. 

after hearing about the fact that a queen from the old world was possessed and we had to take her down, we traveled there where we ran into none other than alek’s brother ciro, daegal’s mom, and another character from daegal’s backstsory. ciro told alek that the rest of the family was dead - after the world ended, their mother hadn’t stopped aging like everyone else and passed on due to old age. luce, their youngest sister, had become possessed and killed their older brother, father, and milo’s parents, before ciro was forced to kill her. he then left, and ended up traveling with his companions.

(this was originally intended to be much darker, as our dm, josh, had planned for us to have to fight a possessed luce at some point had the campaign gone on as long as it was originally supposed to)

we killed the queen, but then were forced to flee to an alternate version of reality (”what the world really looked like” apparently) in order to save the ending world. upon entering this alternate version of reality, everyone else we knew was killed in the onslaught of enemies which overwhelmed the world.

we were transported quite a bit after that, ending up in the tavern we originally started our campaign’s journey in - the bees and brambles tavern. the world around us was gone. nothing was left. thus, we had survived our second world ending.

we were forced to confront the god rahat, in the form of the fused form of roy and rufus, the half elves who had given us our original quest that brought us together. angry and feeling betrayed by the people he had created from himself, we managed to calm him down and convince him to restore the world to its previous state.

BUT THEN bosharifal, rahat’s godly brother, busted in, angrily confronting us about stealing his brother from him. we managed to get the two to talk, however, and bosharifal realized how unwanted rahat felt back in their home, since no one worshiped him anymore. 

with this all settled, the gods decided to allow the world to exist, and all the people in it to exist as more than just parts of the god rahat, but as their own people with their own lives and journeys. all the dead were brought back to life, and our characters were able to live their lives in peace with their loved ones.

at this point, we were told to say goodbye to our characters, and goodbye to roleplaying them because their lives were their own now. we couldn’t control their destinies anymore. everyone was crying. i was like full on sobbing. they thanked us for bringing them to their happy ends, and the campaign ended. 

the end

[asoulofatlantis]

Summery of my reactions to watching the final stuff of Ao no Kiseki

Lechter and Killika were amazing!

KEVIN! Don’t you dare die on me!

(It's really nice to finally see some scenes with music and sound btw *.*)

Pater-Mater! Oh no!

RENNE!

Pater-Mater just sacrificed himself to save Renne... this is so sad.

T-This is not even the final dungeon yet! I would have never made it to the final dungeon today if that actually is not even the final dungeon!

Honestly this police-boss-guy is shady AF

Oh no! Shizuku is crying!

Arios just gifted Lloyd with his brothers Weapons. How... makaber is this?

I love the “Lets player” XD He was talking about how Arios already admitted that he killed Guy and Lloyd in this exact moment: “It isn’t sure if he killed him.” The Lets player: “BUT HE ADMITTED TO IT!” XD

Oh... Guy was shot from behind. That... is not what Arios would have done. He is not using guns and he is very unlikely someone who would kill another person from behind. But... WHY WASN’T THAT MENTIONED BEFORE?!

Ui! A Kevin and Ries Moment. I don’t have many feelings for them... but I am a shipper at heart. Best way to win me over? Be part of a shipping! XD

I do not know why I have tears in my eyes AGAIN because of Renne. But... Pater-Mater was her family for so long. Its painful to see this farewell.

OH MY GOD! HE IS USING THAT THING LIKE A DIVING KNIGHT!

IAN! IAN? I.... I CAN’T BELIEVE THIS! This... this is... this is such a Trails-Game-Move! Someone you never would have suspected turned against you in the end... why didn’t I see that coming? Its not the first time this happens!

I love how the Lets player is pretending to be shocked and then he is like: “We are going to get a cutscene here so I stay quite...” basically telling us he played the game already ^^’ Anyway... he is a bad actor, so you can see through this.

Oh boy... KeA just turned into that Azure-Tree. I was wondering when that thing would come into play. It even showed up in Trails of Cold Steel. But I never thought KeA herself would be that thing.

(Uff...eve just watching the important scenes takes sooo much time! I have to get up at 4 in the morning tomorrow! T.T)

Uh! A pretty animated scene. I am almost sad that we don’t get then in Cold Steel anymore.

This dungeon is huge! I am so glad that I do not have to do this myself ^^’ Really, the lets player is constantly whining about how long this dungeon is.

I think Wald was used as a bad Plot-Device for Wazy...

He just said “Gute Nacht” to him. Trails Games and their German...

Oh god! A puzzle in this dungeon! I am so glad I am not playing that myself...

“God forbid we kill someone in this game!” XD  I can feel this man so much. (He was talking about that Shirley will probably hunt us in Cold Steel now, since we left her alive - and look who is indeed hunting us in CS3 just one year after he played that: Shirley. I feel ya, man. I feel ya.)

This guy is amazing. He defeated Randys Uncle in less than 3 Minutes. Wow!

Now Lloyd acts like all he ever wanted was to find out what happened to his brother. Not like that that was ever mentioned in Zero or much talked about in Ao either, while we are at it...

I have to give you this info, because it is important to get the Picture. The first crime division were Dudley still works in knew that the attack that killed Arios wife and made Shizuku go blind was a terrorist-attack but kept it a secret - probably for political reasons. We also found out that Lloyds Parents and the family of Ian were killed because of such things. (In the main plot, btw, it is never mentioned what happened to either Lloyds parents or Ians family as far as I can remember and since it seems to be important for the plot, this is really a huge ass plothole here...) So of course Arios was disappointed in the police. He also needed more money for Shizukus treatment and of course he was also running away from the sorrow of the loss of his wife. He ended up working with Ian probably because he wanted revenge of some sort. Or a conclusion. Something like that. Its actually not said what his reasons were, other than joining people who wanted to do something against all the shit that Calvard and Erebonia pulled with the people of Crossbell while actually at war with each other. He also got KeA out of her place in the Sun temple and put her into the auction. Mariabell planed all that to get rid of the Mafia. She actually wanted to take custody of KeA herself but didn’t stop us when we did. Weird... Anyway... now about Guys death... Well... basically Guy found out ALL of the things that were going on behind the scenes, including the plan for the fake attack on Crossbell to gain independence (that happened years later...) and so he faced Arios who was involved in all this from the very beginning. They had a duel to death but Arios was not the one who killed Guy in the end - doesn’t make so much difference to me as he WANTED to kill him, but once again, we are in a Trails-Game here, so... whatever.

And once again Lloyd does not want to revenge his brother... tze... (I mean, granted... Guy was not killed by Arios, but once again he WANTED to kill him AND also was indirectly responsible for him being killed because the fight distracted him...)

Ian of course shot Guy. I just don’t know why Arios is defending him. But there is more to it. Guy offered Arios to keep it a secret what he knew and stay friends, was even talking about his wedding (probably a translation-mistake when Lloyd said in the first game that Guy lost his long loved woman to another man...) and so on and just when Arios was considering it... Ian shot him from behind. Arios was not happy about it. And yet... he defended Ian. I don’t fully get it actually. Why would Arios protect this man and say he himself killed Guy?

Ohhh... I think KeA saw the future and in this future her Friends got killed and she decided to work with Mariabell to protect them. Makes sense. For once.

HOLY SHIT! I was wrong. She didn’t see us get killed in the future we actually did get killed and she - with her enorme powers - changed that by more or less turning back time and in that timeline we managed to become close to Renne, Estelle and Joshua and so they joined us and thanks to that we managed to survive... WOW! KeA actually arranged that we solved Rennes problem with her family and that's how things came into fruition WTF?!

And the bad guys now want to use KeAs power to alter reality so that Crossbell is the mayor power who rules over Erebonia and Calvard. (Now if that would have happened Osborn would be screwed and his whole plan ruined! XD)

Wow... a few nice words and Ian is a good guy again? Right. Trails game...

Mariabell actually did us a favor in killing Ian ^^’

So in the end Mariabell is the Semi-final boss...

Apparently KeAs magic subconsciously leads to everyone wanting to love and care about her. So what? No big deal in my eyes. No one else but KeA herself seems to care either.

Its nice that Lloyd got some closure with his brother. Although I doesn’t deserve it ^^’ It was a touching scene tho.

Awwwww. Armes Baby KeA... ♥ (She is finally back to normal. Saved by Lloyds unconditional love and cheesy speeches XD)

Oh... she didn’t kill Ian. I can’t believe that. Even the Lets player was like: “Seriously? *sfz*” XD

I found it a bit unsatisfying that KeA just simply lost her powers and nothing else. Its... uh... boring in a way? ^^’

Anyway... I am finally done with this game. FINALLY!

Tho I have to say... it really has an amazing plot. It was not bad at all. Tho it still lacked a few things.

[thenameisbinx]

Blame Monday

ive been wanting to write down this entry since tuesday but i was busy trying to regulate my thoughts. Writing has always been my point of solace where in i find peace of mind and a completely different outlet as to talking to my friends about what im going through. i’ve set to making this entry in defining my roles and the effect of them. however, i ended up realizing its too complicated to describe. 

so let’s start it like this instead. 

Facade - a false, superficial, or artificial appearance or effect

OK. let’s not waste anytime by letting people see who you really are.  Smile for the audience and don’t show that your hurt, in pain, or depressed. Keep moving and show that you’re fine. be in everyone’s good graces. please them like a slave. adapt, change for them, plead for their acceptance. All the while, bury your thoughts of reality within you. you’ll get to that stage where youre always wanted. 

Reality bites. you keep wearing a mask for too long that you forget how to be weak, to be vulnerable. i learned that word when i was seven. one of the words you learn at that age where words originating from the french language. it was along the lines of “rendezvous” words or english classes that tries to teach different sounds of words that has literal sounding letters. When the teacher told us what it means, i always thought it was acting. Facade is a character that you want to play but not in a movie, but in your life. it dawned on me that ive been doing that awhile. since i could remember. Then i keep just playing along. 

Before, i would bring the sadness of my day by showing to the people that i’m ok. That it doesnt hurt. My mom pulled my hair and complained how thick it was, even if i was sitting still not wanting her to try to do my hair. called me, “worthless” and “incompetent”. instead of crying, i’d laugh and play around with some classmates the moment i get to school. Or the time that my sister made fun of how ugly i was in front of her friends, that i’m just an orphan. I just talked back and said, “Well, at least im not fat.” Then, there was this one time that my dad scolded me for trying to play in my undergarments, i wasnt naked but i was wearing a thick white top under my uniform and some thick shorts thats long enough to touch my knee under my skirt, like my friends were doing at school. i wore three layers everyday and wasnt allowed to take it off till i go home but i saw some kids doing it. took a layer off and played. i was 6. Dad dragged me out of my school yard and slapped me right in front of the guard. Don’t get me started with my brother. let’s just say, he never made me feel like im important in the family. he’s the only person that treats me like im nothing and no one until now. like my opinions didnt matter, or as if what i do doesnt have any relevance. yet, i’m the jolly one. the funny one. the energetic one. the loud one. the push over. easy definition, the masochist. Harsh but partially true.  

Now, implications. still, verbal cues. like, “lazy”, or “stupid”. in the family, its more verbal but emotional responses. Mostly they cuss, or scream or yell. If i reciprocate the same but not intentionally, i still get scolded. i cant talk back because im just the help. i’m obligated to do what they want me to. Even if im tired from work. Even if i just got dumped. Even if my mind is going through some stuff. 

what you dont know. i go through these every day and i don’t bring it at work or when i go out with “friends”. I’ll go to work with a smile on my face like nothing bad ever happened to my life. i’d put that big smile on my face and just laugh things out. Remember just the little good things that happened and seemingly move on, but i don’t. its slowly sinking into my chest. Subconsciously weeping like a baby, consciously aware that during a meeting i’d want to cry just because i couldnt keep it in a box. i’d clench my fist as if im waiting for my palms to bleed because it crate wasn’t chained shut. it oozes when you can’t regulate. 

Obedient -  submissive to the restraint or command of authority

the words “dont” and “do” are basic commands to me. any question that has “did” are immediate doubt on me or even the start of the sentence “have you” makes me quiver already. i was taught to obey a form of authority. Parents, older siblings, uncles, aunties, prefects, teachers, apparently, anyone who is older. so when someone says, “believe me” or “did you know”, i immediately am in awe. i believe them. the fun fact is stuck in my head. i pass down the knowledge or experience. There’s another word for obedience, gullible.

i was once asked by my brother to go through trash when i was a kid. because he threw something he shouldnt. i was asked to do my sister’s homework because my mom overheard her asking me to do so. i was told by my so called friends to ask people for their numbers for them for their friendship in exchange. I have reached the point that i feel guilty when im not doing what people ask me to. 

imagine working. imagine dating. imagine meeting new people. i can paint a picture but it’s too painful. Subconsciously, i thought i have removed that side of me. unfortunately, reflecting on the past few days, NOPE. i thought my defensive stature in every decision ive made was and the only way to take off that obedience or gullible card. Looks like i have been. being conditioned this way from the very beginning makes it seem impossible to take off. Obedience equals to gullibility. Refusal equals to guilt. 

my dad comes home drunk one time, asked me to give him his gun to point at my brother. i said no, he shook me. no one else stopped me but i obeyed. i talked to my sister’s friends once. she told me never to talk to them and beat me up till i had bruises on my stomach. i wanted to cry when one of her friends talked to me. so i ran away. i wasn’t allowed to sleep until i memorized multiplication set of 9. it was 3AM, i woke up on the bathroom toilet. my mom woke up and asked me to recite it. closed the door and told me to recite it till i said the right answers. there’s consequences if i dont follow. i took that till adulthood. 

i have guilt if i don’t do what i was asked to. more guilt if i really decide not to. it consumes me till i finally give in. i feel regretful right after. then, i completely try to forget. that never happened. ever tried telling your boss no? i learned how to say no last year. i had multiple speeches dedicated to me with people saying, “Do you even know how to say no? do you even hear thank you?” i feel obligated to do what people want. i feel obligated to give what people want or need without being asked to. let’s stop there. i sound stupid. 

Strength -  legal, logical, or moral force;  degree of potency of effect or of concentration

People see what i want them to see. Facade comes into this picture. i’m always strong. can never show my weakness. if i do, i lose. if i don’t, i lose internally. i’ve been playing the supergirl card all my life. issue is, i’m always alone. always the savior never the saved. 

Superhero syndrome. ever heard that song Superman? 

It may sound absurd but don't be naive Even Heroes have the right to bleed I may be disturbed but won't you concede Even Heroes have the right to dream It's not easy to be me

my whole life revolves three things; work, home, friends. i always wanted to be alone, but i don’t survive it much. never felt wanted anywhere, even if its family or friends. then, work came. loved it because it was the only place the NEEDED me. but seems that i wear my cape there everyday. to the point that i couldnt be clark kent there either. always strong, never vulnerable. 

been saying lately, im tired of being strong. then Monday came. That’s that for strength, it’s pretty self explanatory on my side. it’s too literal of a section so i hope this would suffice. for the last of the entry. 

Tired -  drained of strength and energy

Trigger : work

Action : Resignation

Symptoms : Nausea, shaking hands and knees, vomiting, clouded vision, crying, Lack of sleep, loss of appetite, lack of motivation, heavy breathing, sleep paralysis, sleep apnea

Diagnosis : Unknown

Working Impression : Panic Anxiety Disorder

i’ve defined some of my roles. a glimpse of my mind and soul but to the people i’ll be send a link of this too, i bet you only know some. some, would even say they never knew. you know, i dont share my feeling or these heavy stories. seemed irrelevant. one time, 1st grade. i shared a problem about the family to a friend. This ‘friend’ made it seem too petty to the point i avoided sharing problems since then. i feel like any problem i have has no value to others. so i keep it in. just me. maybe a few blank pages. some ink. mostly tears. by myself. on my own. 

when i feel bad, or depressed when i was a kid. i would cry faintly inside my closet. come out after an hour or two. wiping tears of my face. i got caught once, by my dad. i just said, nope i was just checking my closet. i acted as if what he said before that point was ok. i step out when i feel weird and want to cry. ive learned how to cry heavily without showing an expression or even in a quiet manner. Congrats to me, i brought that till adulthood. 

Until Monday. i tried to put up my mask. but couldnt. i tried to be strong. but couldnt. i tried to obey. but couldnt. i remember asking my boss recently, can i be selfish? all my walls broke down in one day. all my optimism. my positivity. and i thought that i can do it. what people saw of me, they couldnt recognize me. 

i showed me. the weak one. couldnt even get myself to fake it. fake being strong, fake happiness, no mask. i couldnt even try. i was just done. even basing on what ive written on this entry, getting tired wouldnt be an option just yet. i didnt even talk about love or difficulties. i only got to write down instances. i was just done pretending.

since that day, i couldnt regulate. i associated almost everything and get anxious about everything. seeing the exit to my work makes me tense. walking to the building tightens my chest. getting inside makes me palpitate. claustrophobic. i dont usually breathe heavy but the doctor said breathing exercises would help. SOMETIMES it does. but not everytime. 

it took years to learn how to regulate these thoughts that i experience daily and i feel like i have to go through two decades again to learn how. i didnt lose myself, thats for sure. but i feel like im not strong enough to stay in one place anymore. to have the same people in my life anymore. i want to leave. i want to disappear. 

you know what i did after i broke down on my boss? i sat in a Starbucks branch in Molito. and starred out the window for two hours. spaced out. even my friends knew i dont do that. i felt like i died and im just the undead walking around doing my daily routine. 

why am i writing this? it’s 2:35AM. nearly sleepy by the way. i’m writing this for me to realize something. i already just did. i just realized that what people knew of me, wasn’t me. what you see and experience of me now, is the true me and i dont like it. i want to be wild binx on good days. bea when im home. bianca when im at work. looks like i can’t be that for a while. 

to those im sending this link to, i hope you read the whole thing. so you really know where i’m at. youre worried or concerned yea? well, here i am. here it is. i’m sorry im dumping my indifference this way. i’m sorry that im burdening you of my petty problems. i’m sorry i cant be myself. i’m sorry i cant be that person you knew. 

blame Monday.