#but she was. dull like a real reptile and that's fine but

[hannahchronism]

biggest concern for the upcoming eragon series is saphira getting sidelined because she is too expensive to do the sfx work for. it’s a show about a young boy growing into his role as dragon rider pls do not sideline,,,,,,,,,the dragon

[saturniidays]

If you ever feel like being angry you should look up big brand pet store chain animal care guides. I’m looking at the Petco tarantula one now and jfc.

ah yes. “The Spider Family.” we definitely have someone who knows what they’re talking about.

please dont feed your tarantulas every day. I’m pretty sure that shady breeders do this to force their tarantulas to grow faster so they can sell faster, but doing that shortens their lifespan. 

dear god don’t use anything chunky for substrate. no mulch or bark. and don’t use just plain sphagnum moss either. why would you do that. sometimes. a species might like it drier. amazing.

why would you need a nocturnal or infrared light. I keep a normal flashlight on my nightstand so I can look at Buttercup when she’s out and about at 2am and she literally doesn’t care. remember that whenever a pet store tells you to buy so much unnecessary stuff they definitely have your money more in mind than your pet’s health and safety.  

HOLY SHIT OH MY GOD DON’T DO THIS. DON’T USE BLEACH. AND CLEAN ONCE A WEEK????? IS THIS FOR REAL???? YOU ARE GOING TO ENCOURAGE PEOPLE TO DESTROY THEIR TARANTULAS BURROWS EVERY WEEK JUST SO YOU CAN SELL THEM SUBSTRATE OVER AND OVER. THEY DON’T EVEN GET THAT DIRTY. UNLESS THERE IS A MOLD ISSUE YOU CAN PROBABLY GET AWAY WITH CLEANING THEM YEARLY.

uhhh tarantulas are extremely weird and unpredictable. eating regularly is definitely not a good way to tell if they are healthy. the species I keep (A. chalcodes) for example is notorious for going on ridiculous fasting periods for months because they are bastards but they are just fine.

dull exoskeleton likewise is not a red flag, but a sign that they are in premolt. not a bad thing. and like I said before tarantulas are bastards that go on hunger strikes for no reason so loss of appetite isn’t out of the ordinary either. At the bug zoo I volunteer at we had one tarantula who refused to eat for an entire year yet she did just fine.

Are there tarantula vets????? I feel like if I contacted my vet about a spider they would laugh at me?? there must be like 3 of them in the world if there are. you are better off contacting a tarantula forum or the tarantula subreddit for help.

Look at all of this unnecessary crap they want to sell you. I highlighted the only things you need. Of course you need crickets or another food source, preferably roaches cause crickets can be disease magnets. my friend who runs the bug zoo is very against using crickets as feeders. 

what are you even supposed to do with vitamin or calcium supplements? Petco does know that tarantulas aren’t reptiles right? and don’t. just. don’t use a tank heater. they thrive just fine at room temperature and if they burrow on top of the heater it is going to be way too hot for them. they could burn themselves or become dehydrated and dry up. 

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #426

“insatiable furnace, burning up our surplus  /  watching all essential life become another servant”

Are you a brunette? Yep. It is way past due time that I get it dyed... What is your favorite channel on TV? I don't really watch TV, but if I did, I'm pretty sure it'd probably be Discovery. Have you ever been to Chicago, IL? Yes!! It's my only experience with a truly BIG city, and though I'm not a city person, the experience was pretty magical. It was something I wasn't even remotely used to. Just so much life and business and energy to feel there. Who was your first friend? Brianna. She was the sister of my older sister's best friend. What is your favorite holiday? Christmas. :') Do you regret your last kiss? Nope. Have you ever taken a karate class? No. Who was the last person to tell you ‘I love you’? My mom. Have you ever been to the Statue of Liberty? No. Do you live on your own? Noooo. I don't think I ever could. I would have to stay VERY busy, or else the loneliness would kill me. Hell, even if I was very active in stuff, I still don't know if I could. With how bad my depression is capable of being, it doesn't sound smart at all for me to move out unless it was with somebody. Are your the oldest child? No, I'm the middle kid. How many X-rays have you had in the last 2 years? Two, maybe? One for my legs and the other for my teeth. Are you on good terms with your last ex? Yeah, we're best friends. Do you have scars you don’t like to talk about? Nah. Do you freak out if a bee/wasp flies near you? ... yes lol. What subjects in history interest you most? The Holocaust. It's just so... shocking and extreme that it's oddly fascinating, but of course horribly sad. Are you superstitious in any way? Nah. How do you get rid of anxiety? Do what? Are there any items of jewelry you never/rarely take off? Yeah, my two rings, my lip piercing, and tragus piercing. Has a song ever made you cry before? There are many. ^If so, what about it brought you to tears? Again, I said "many," so this would be a horribly long list. There are four though - "Eternally Yours" and "Another Life" by Motionless in White, "Stairway to Heaven" by Led Zeppelin, and "The Mortician's Daughter" by Black Veil Brides - that I really, really try to avoid, because I WILL cry. They're all associated with Jason for one reason or another. "Stairway to Heaven," especially, is absolutely forbidden for me to listen to. Would you consider yourself open-minded? Very, honestly. Have you ever met someone online that you wanted to meet in real life? I've met Sara! :') There are a handful of others I'd love to meet, too. Tell me about the last thing that made you laugh until it hurt. Wow, I have no idea. I don't remember the last time I laughed THAT hard. When you graduate, what color will your gown be? Ugh, it was this insufferable red. We got to vote on it, and I really wanted navy instead, as it looks more formal and not as obnoxious to me, but red won. Do you own a gun? No. My household legally can't because of my suicidal history. What color of shirt are you wearing? It's a black tank top. Do you use any acne medication? Nah, I don't really get acne anymore. Are you emotional or very stoic? I'm emotional as shit. Have you ever watched an anime series, start to finish? A few. There's Fullmetal Alchemist (as well as the Brotherhood expansion), Deadman Wonderland, and Ginga Densetsu Weed. I've seen bits of others. Which baby animal is your favorite? MEERKATS!!!!!! :') Once they reach three/four weeks, they're fucking precious. I also really like kittens. Do you like jam on your toast and biscuits? Sometimes. Have you ever reread a book? It is very, VERY rare I do this. The only cases I remember are for Because of Winn-Dixie and Meerkat Manor: Flower of the Kalahari. Do you have any religious symbols in your home? I think Mom has some religious quotes on the walls? What religion do you identify with, if any? None. What is you favorite flavor of pudding and/or yogurt? I love chocolate pudding, but I'm not very big on yogurt because of the sourness. I can sometimes eat a cookies 'n cream one, but occasionally I'm like "ew." We’re going to the best amusement park ever, first ride you choose is? One of those water rides where you go down a big slope. Did you have intense night terrors as a child? No. Know anybody who works in a tattoo parlor? No. That'd be dope. Have you ever had a piercing get infected? Ugh, yes. Worst was the first time I got my tongue pierced. It was early into infection though, thank God; I ended up having to take it out and get it re-pierced later. Have you ever shoplifted? No. Do you hate when people say, "Everything’s going to be fine,“ when it’s not? Sometimes. It can feel kinda dismissive of your extreme situation, and sometimes, things simply won't be okay. Like, you can't tell that to someone on their death bed. Do you check your fire alarms when you’re supposed to? No, oops. Are you a shorts-wearing kind of person? Absolutely not. Nobody wants to see my legs, not even me. Is your grandparents’ house obsessively tidy? My grandma's sure as hell was. She was very old-fashioned and "proper" and took cleanliness and manners very seriously. Do you know how to jumpstart a car? Nope. Would you date someone 8 years older than you? Probably. What did you do today? I WENT TO THE GYM AND DID A FULL HOUR OF EXERCISE!!!!! :') For once I am SO fucking proud of myself. I left drenched in sweat, but I also left with a feeling of great accomplishment. I'm going to be going twice a week now with a personal trainer. (: Who was the last person you fell asleep with? Sara. Have you ever punched a hole in the wall? No. People doing that shit terrifies me. Have you ever felt replaced? Sure have. Have you ever kissed someone who was high? No. If you caught your significant other cheating on you what would you do? I don't have a partner, but hypothetically, leave their ass in a blink. I don't fuck with those kind of people. Do you know who Jeffree Star is? Well, yes. I watch him on YT sometimes and (astonishingly) love his music, and I find his work ethic extremely inspiring. That man knows how to hustle. What’s your favourite alcoholic beverage? Probably sangrias. When was the last time you saw a photo of your ex? "The" ex, it's been years. I've removed all pictures I have of him, irl and digitally, because it's triggering for me. How many push-ups can you do? Probably zero. Do you play any games on your phone? There's Pokemon GO, DragonVale, and Dragons of Atlantis that I play semi-regularly. Have you ever received a compliment from a stranger? Yes. Have you ever shaved your face? Just my upper lip to avoid the lady stache, ha ha. What colour is your front door? It’s white. Do you take the stairs or the elevator? If an elevator is available, I will ALWAYS use that. I have an extreeeemely hard time getting up stairs because of having just about no leg muscle. Do you get motion sickness? No. When was the last time you went to your favourite restaurant? Oh man, it's been forever. :/ Olive Garden sounds soooo good right now. Do either of your parents have any tattoos or piercings? No. Well, Mom has her earlobes pierced once, but that's it. Are you desperate for anyone’s approval, in particular? It's funny, even though he hasn't been a part of my life for years, I still desperately crave what I think would make Jason proud. There have been many times where my mind has wondered to what he would think of me now... and I know it's not good. Are there any activities you enjoy doing, but can only do for a short amount of time before you get bored or tired of them? Reading. When was the last time you felt hopeful, and why? Today, after finishing my workout at the gym. I think, finally, that I may be taking another stride forward in life. Do you find yourself asking for the same things for your birthdays and for holidays? Ha, yup: a new tattoo, 100%. What is something someone recommended to you that you disliked/hated? Girt's recommended some music to me before. He loves sharing songs he likes with me. Of course I didn't tell him it sucked, ha ha. What’s a fact about the last person you kissed? She is very passionate about animals, reptiles in particular, and is simply amazing with them. If you had a child, would you rather have a girl or a boy? A girl for sure. Has anybody ever accused you of doing drugs? No. Have you ever fallen asleep with the last person you kissed? Yeah. Honestly, do you think that you will wanna settle down in the same town you’re currently residing in? HELL no. I hate this place. Does anyone call you darling? If so who? Sara does sometimes. Are you close to any of your cousins? No. Are you a romantic person? I think I am. What’s the coolest thing you’ve seen out the window of an airplane? Mountains. Have you ever been in the mountains when the moon and stars were up? NO BUT FUCK I WANT THAT. Just lay in a grassy spot with some s'mores or something and just ~vibe~. Do people like your hair? I get complimented on it a bit. Have you ever held birdseed and a bird came and ate out of your hand? Yeah, at a bird sanctuary. Could you ever live in Alaska? Hell yeah, I'd enjoy that. On the main page on YouTube, what’re the three recommended videos? There's one by a WoW gold maker, a song by 3TEETH, and a video of bullsnakes hatching. Do you really care how many friends you or anyone else has on Myspace/Facebook? Couldn't care less. I only "friend" people I know and care about. Does your significant other have any piercings? I'm single. Do you ever get bored of yourself? Oh, all the time. I feel like I'm extremely dull and plain and, well, boring. How many band shirts do you own? Which? Oh goodness, I have no idea. I own a lot. Do you go to shows mostly for the music, the moshing, or the merchandise? I go for the music. It's nice to buy merch, but it's SO expensive that it's dumb. Moshing, I think is just stupid. Have you ever had anything pierced that you don’t have now? Many places, actually. So many holes closed because piercings had to be taken out when I was in the psych hospital. I was so annoyed. Who were you with the first time you watched the last movie you watched? I was alone. Do you have any twins/multiples in your family? Are they identical or fraternal? No. What is the highest number of jobs you’ve had at one time? One. Is your mom a good mom? She is the actual best. Last thing you threw in the garbage? The crust of some leftover pizza I had this morning. I generally eat the crust, but this time it was WAY too hard.

[smolnoms]

A Wolf’s Gotta Eat

I’m writing a story, didn’t think I’d make it to three chapters, but to celebrate doing so I’m putting up the first chapter. It’s my favorite, as it’s got all the good shit I like in it.

What’s In It?: Mouthplay, unwilling prey, animal-human hybrid giants and tinies, mouthplay, foodplay (of sorts? It’s with alcohol.) teasing at soft/fatal vore, and lastly, mouthplay.

Plot’s not super relevant, but to summarize; This world is one of animalistic tinies and giants. Think hybrids. The tinies used to live on lands far below, but due to famines and shit, they found a way to the top through the generations. However, they weren’t expecting the large dangers that lay above…

Character desc. for your convenience: P’veil is a black wolf hybrid, Juol a monkey hybrid, and Hugh is a lizard hybrid. The tiny gets described in ch. but is currently unnamed until later chapters.

Down the wet, empty streets came a dark figure. 

They were one of the many mutts found infesting the shadiest parts of a town so run down and run over, it was a miracle that it still stood. 

Hard working to all, loyal to a rare few...but honestly? That could be said of many.

No, truly, despite their reputation and the respect they held, they never let themself be anything more than another faceless grunt of the back alleys, selling questionable products at best, and morally horrific at worst. Sometimes, even they were a tad frazzled by some of the things that found their way into their little corner of the market, such as the severed leg of a wolf, one that so closely resembled their own…

But, hey! That wasn’t relevant right now. 

What they were really focused on now, was getting a drink.

“Hey, world to P’veil!”

A snapping finger inches from their face jerked them back to reality. Standing before them was a gruff, round man, sporting a grin sharpened with fangs, and a lower portion heavily drabbed in the scales of a reptile. He even sported a short, thick tail just beyond him, one with rounded edges and stained a dull green.

Another voice, higher than his, spoke up besides him. “You’ve been rather spacy tonight…”

P’veil turned to look at a female this time, one with a lengthy brown tail and wide, clawed brown furred feet and hands.

“D’aww, guys, there’s no need to worry about me, I’m just fine.” The entire line was delivered without the friendly mirth one might have expected, and yet, it was paired with a genuine smile, one that shot past them and out beyond the stretching street.

“Well, if that’s the case, then hurry your little furry butt!” Hugh, the reptilian man, barked out in laughter.

“Yes, let’s,” the other, Juol, agreed. As she passed by P’veil, she grinned cheerily, and gently dragged her dull claws across P’veil’s arm. They shivered, goosebumps trailing behind.

“Come on now, wolfy,” Juol cooed, and P’veil couldn’t help but continue alongside their two friends.

The three walked the abandoned streets, void of the rare few honest folk still left in this town. On occasion, pairs of glowing eyes would appear from deeper, untredded roads, either sitting still, or scurrying away as soon as they were noticed.

It did not trouble these three. Not at all.

Having let the silence stretch out long enough, P’veil piped up, curiosity making their voice softer than it ought to be. “I hear this bar is different than the rest.”

“Oh, it’s true! Tell them, Hugh,” Juol sing-songed.

The old man grinned playfully, and paused to sweep a hand outwards to a single building. It was an unusually long building, brown bricked and colorfully stained by sputtering neon sign that hung, crooked, above the entrance. The narrow steel door was not one that invited the pure or the weak to join in on the fun.

“Why don’t you find out for yourself?”

P’veil found themself standing just in front of the door, brow raised and eyes flickering in appraisal. The only real thing that caught their gaze was the neon sign. 

Depicted in bright purple and yellow was a humanoid lioness. She was poised with a hand raised towards her mouth, and fingers wrapped around something. However, it didn’t appear to be a glass of wine...

Done loitering, P’veil finally placed a clawed hand on the cold door, and shoved it open.

“Right up to the front, now! To the bartop!” Hugh crowed, shuffling his overall straps higher before waddling over.

Juol merely hummed, and sauntered over with a toothy grin.

P’veil glanced around quickly. It was dark, with small lighting here and there that made it clear that it was deliberately dim. Numerous human-animal hybrid creatures were milling about, more or less quietly, all sectioned off into their little groups, and occasionally casting looks around at the others, just as P’veil was now doing. They stopped before they could make the mistake of making eye contact with someone, and went to join the other two.

Hugh and Juol sat siddled next to each other, and P’veil gravitated over to Hugh’s side, settling down on a plush, worn-red stool. Their pure black tail hung off the edge.

“I already took the liberty of ordering for you,” Hugh said. “For the joy of mystery!” he tacked on, to appease P’veil’s flash irritation.

“Oh, right, the secret,” they murmured. 

“Hmhmm! Oh, I just know you’ll love it! Perhaps, even more that Juol!”

“Impossible,” Juol smirked, eagerly awaiting her own drink with little bouncing motions.

Humming, P’veil settled further in their seat, softly tapping a sharp claw against the hard countertop. Hells, they were intrigued now. They supposed they could wait, just for a bit, for such an anticipation.

As they awaited their drink, they tried to guess at what the mystery was. First off, they relied on their best sense, and scented the air.

...Sweat and alcohol, expectedly. The heavy odor made them huff, though for a second, they detected something hiding just underneath. They licked their lips, and looked up at the menus that hung above the back of the bar.

And, as expected, it listed off all the drinks that were available, paired with the occasional image. 

Yet what was most curious about some of the drinks, from half the menus, were the strange words freshly painted next to them. Something about it sparked a familiar feeling from P’veil. They remembered that these things were very new, and a sudden popularity to the black market.

“Wait...are, is this-ow!” They sneered at Hugh, who had swatted them. “What was that for?”

“For cheating,” he smugly said. “Honestly, there’s no fun with you, I swear-”

Just then, the bartender returned. The three leaned forward on their seats, eagerly awaiting the reveal of their drinks. 

Not one to tease, the bartender (a hulking man with a snake’s head), swiftly slid a glass in front of each person. 

And P’veil...smiled...wide.

For, sitting right in the middle of their drink was a little, pink, amphibian, tiny humanoid.

And it was staring right up at them with scared, orange eyes.

“Oh Hugh! Ya really outdid yourself!” P’veil hollered, ribbing the man. He returned their laugh while dragging his own glass closer to himself. 

“I’m real glad you think so,” he rumbled, toying with his glass and his own prey that sat within. “Now, bon appetit!” 

“Yes.” They lifted up their glass in one swift motion. The pink axolotl-boy yelped and scrambled feebly for a hold as the glass began to tilt. “Bon appetit!”

The small hybrid cried out, his pleas ringing off the glass. “No!”s and “please!”s and “I don’t wanna die!” crashed and burned on their ears. 

The glass was emptied, and the prey tumbled into their mouth.

The rushing burn of alcohol was swallowed, and following it was the smooth, warm, struggling form of the small youth. Tiny hands feebly pushed out, brushing against their tongue, their teeth, and even smaller head nubs tickled the roof of their mouth. They simply sat there, feeling his squirming on their tongue, and relished in the euphoria of having something so small, so vulnerable, trapped within the heat of their mouth. After a moment sampling his taste, they teased their mouth open.

He gasped in a breath. Brown hair was matted, wet, to his forehead, along with his shorts, the only clothes to drape his body.

“Please, stop...I can’t…” he wheezed, already withering from the assault. He tried crawling outward, and they lifted him along with their tongue, watching amusedly as a tiny arm reached out into the open air.

And gently, ever so gently, they brought their tongue back in, and closed their fangs down on the arm.

He took in a sharp breath. They felt his body go impossibly still inside their mouth. In the silence, they felt his tiny heart hammering away inside his tiny rib cage, shuddering along at a mile a minute.

And then, with a rumbling laugh, their sharp maw opened once more. Their hands fished inside their teeth and removed the drenched, tiny body, and let him hover right in front of their face.

He stared back with impossibly wide eyes.

“Oh, yes,” they purred. A long tongue slid out and lapped up the sides of his body, taking extra pleasure as his tiny hands and feet pushed out in retaliation. “I do believe I will be coming here more often, eheheh. Now, shall we get this show on the road?” they asked. For some reason they couldn’t discern, a small spark lit up in their prey’s eyes, but they ignored it, preparing to slurp him up again. 

“Wait!” he cried, much louder than ever before. They ignored him, and decided to start with that tail of his. Licking a long stripe up its back, they opened up just enough to suck it in.

“I remember! I-she was- there was-!”

Two tiny legs kicked out as they opened up for those too, slipping them in and along their tongue without a second thought. They kicked and clawed, but found no hold along the slick muscle.

“Her name, it, it was-“

In came the torso. They felt his abdomen contract and wobble with his words, and small hands grasped desperately at their fangs.

“Her name, it was Ohrei!”

P’veil felt every muscle in their body freeze as their tiny prey warbled out that name. They gasped, and unfortunately began choking as this sent their prey halfway down their gullet.

“Woah, easy there P’veil!” Hugh slapped down hard on their back.

With a great spasm, they coughed the tiny body back onto the bar top. It slid along the polished wood, leaving a trail of saliva behind.

A heartbeat or two was spent coughing and sputtering, banging a fist on their chest as they fought to catch their breath. As it slowly came back to them, their gaze quickly sought out the form of their prey.

“Hey,” they barked. They leaned in and peered down at their prey. A long claw poked at him. 

“Hey! What did you say? Say it! Say it again!”

A groan issued out from him. He turned to them with bleary eyes. “Ohrei...she-she told me she knew someone who looked just like you…”

Dead silence. Large red eyes locked onto small orange ones, and for a moment, everything felt delicate and strained.

And he dared not move, watching with a wary eye as his fate twisted and coalesced into a new form…

[unfortunate-stranger-losers]

Six Baudelaires AU, Part Two {AO3} {Masterlist} {Part One}

Chapter Two → in which the Baudelaires move into a nice shack

The six Baudelaire children, six months ago, once would have said that they absolutely could not wait to all move out of the house and never see each other again.

That would have been a lie, of course; they’d’ve loved to see each other on holidays, and when one of them needed a favor. But as many siblings will tell you, being forced to spend two decades of your life cooped up with other people will oftentimes make you very sick of said people, whether those people were your siblings, or, in some cases, your cellmates, or your guardians, or other volunteers, or fellow students. Though the Baudelaires desperately hoped that, in present circumstances, they would not spent two decades with other students.

And in the present circumstances, they were starting to wonder if they’d ever want to be apart from each other again. Especially Nick, who rarely released Solitude from his sight since she was ripped from him to dangle precariously in a birdcage, and now looked like he might never release Klaus, who had recently been hypnotized into almost causing a murder. But Lilac was also feeling this way, as Sunny curled up against her and sucked on her own finger, and she looked over at Violet, who was staring blankly ahead at the door across the hall. They were waiting for their new Vice Principal to come out and tell them what they were to do in their new school.

Lilac glanced back at Sunny, starting to stroke her hair, which had been tied up in a ponytail that morning. Lilac often tied her own ponytails, as did Violet; both girls did that when they were thinking of something they wanted to fix or invent. Lilac was the mechanic, and Violet the inventor, though they occasionally dabbled in each others’ fields. But lately, their repairs and experiments had not been for use of fun, but for use of saving their lives from their former guardian, Count Olaf, who was out to kill their guardians and kidnap them in an effort to steal their fortune. Sunny was not yet old enough to tie her own hair, so her sisters had to do it for her. Lilac had to do a lot of things for her siblings; as the oldest, she considered it her responsibility to protect them, and that was a very difficult job in the present circumstances.

Violet herself had a lot on her mind. She remembered how, very soon before, she had gotten her siblings into great danger with her impulsive and stubborn decisions, and she had trouble deciding if it was worth it. They were all alright, sure, but they might not have been. But her decisions had not made for the thrill of it, but in an effort to preserve the legacy of their recently deceased parents. They had a lot of recently deceased relatives, such as their Uncle Monty and Aunt Josephine, but their parents’ death stung the worst because it was the first real grief the children had experienced.

The twins, Nick and Klaus, sat inbetween their sisters, and Nick took Solitude off of his lap to stretch slightly. They’d been sitting for hours, and Nick was already easily bored, even when they weren’t in a dull hallway listening to a horrible violin playing. Klaus stood up, too, also wanting to stretch.

Both twins were avid readers, but Nick liked reading about places he could go to and things he could see, while Klaus was fine just hiding and reading about whatever he pleased. But both had almost perfect memories about their reading, which became very useful when they were in danger and needed some knowledge very fast.

As he stood, Nick turned to look at his brother, and after a second, he realized something. “Wait a minute.” he said. “Are you… taller than me?”

Klaus blinked at him, as if bewildered that this could be considered important in the current moment. “What?” Nick repeated his question, and Klaus said, “I don’t know!”

Nick walked up to Klaus and stood back-to-back with him. “Vi, measure us.” he said.

Violet groaned and stood, and Solitude said, “Winnie,” which meant, “We could have Babbitt judge; they’re good with numbers!”

Though Soli was only a toddler, who only occasionally spoke in full English sentences and was much more likely to speak in small phrases or her own babytalk that she shared with Sunny, both she and her infant sister were incredibly intelligent, and Solitude herself was a budding herpetologist, a word which here means someone who is obsessed with studying reptiles, especially snakes and frogs in the second youngest Baudelaire’s case. And “Babbitt,” as Solitude said, was a word that here meant the name of the frog Solitude had smuggled along with her as a pet. They were a very tiny, genderfluid, talented frog, who could fit in the toddler’s pocket and sleep on her shoulder, and who could also be used as a projectile weapon.

“Babbitt can’t count in inches or centimeters.” Violet said. “But we don’t need measuring at the moment, we just have to see whose head is above the other’s.”

“Is this the time?” Lilac said.

“Fight!” Sunny cheered.

Sunny was still an infant, though she was fast approaching toddlerhood. She spoke almost exclusively in her and Soli’s babytalk, though she occasionally spouted a word in a language that others who were not her siblings couldn’t understand. While “fight” was one of her favorite words, her most favorite was “bite,” as her current favorite thing to do in the world was bite and tear with her sharp teeth. She was the youngest of the six children, but she was just as brave and noble as her siblings. She also loved to participate in the fun sibling bickering that they all enjoyed, as much as they pretended they did not.

Violet put a hand on Nick’s head, and then said, “Yeah, Klaus has a few inches on you.”

“When did that happen?” Lilac asked, stunned.

“Excuse me?” Nick turned around, glaring at his twin. “You can’t be taller than me!”

“I don’t have control over it!” Klaus said.

Ignoring him, Nick said, as he liked to, “I’m the older brother! I should be taller!”

“You’re only older by thirteen minutes!” Klaus said, as he liked to.

“Still older!”

“We’re not identical, we weren’t gonna be the same height forever!”

“Meaning I should be taller!”

“Could you two shut up?” Lilac asked, leaning her head against the hard back of the bench.

“We’ll shut up when the Vice Principal finally decides to get off his ass and come get us.” Nick said.

“I’m so bored, Li.” Klaus said, sitting back down and adjusting his glasses. “I don’t care what happens, so long as something does.”

At that moment, they heard a tap-tap-tap-tap-tap, and a girl danced down the hall, sliding to a stop in front of the six children.

“Hello, cakesniffers!” she said brightly.

She had a dress that was fluffy and fancy and as pink as the barrettes that pushed back her short ginger curls, and, well, the only articles of clothing she wore that were not pink were a bright red brooch on her chest and her black tap shoes.

“Uh, hello.” Violet said, as Lilac stood up and lifted Sunny. “I’m Violet Baudelaire, this is my older sister Lilac, and these are my other siblings Nick, Klaus, Solitude and Sunny.”

“Cool. Nobody cares.” said the girl. “Everyone here knows that I’m Carmelita Spats, the prettiest, most talented, most bright, most brilliant, most adorable girl in the whole wide world!”

“Most humble, too?” Nick raised an eyebrow.

“Of course.” Carmelita grinned.

“How come you don’t have to wear a uniform?” Lilac asked, looking sour. “I’d give anything to wear black instead of this drab maroon.”

“I’m too adorable for a uniform.” said Carmelita Spats. “I’m supposed to give you a tour. That’s the Vice Principal’s office. Vice Princey Nero says I’m the best and he’s totally right. Follow me, cakesniffers.”

“What does ‘cakesniffer’ mean?” Klaus asked, having rarely come across a word he didn’t know.

“It means you’re stupid cakesniffers.” Carmelita said unhelpfully. “Come along.”

She tapped away, and Violet said, “I don’t think it’s a compliment.”

“And I don’t think I like her dancing.” Nick said. “I don’t think I like her much.”

He bent down and picked up Solitude, and she patted her pocket to make sure Babbitt was still asleep inside. Then the six siblings, in itchy and drab uniforms, followed the adorable girl down the halls.

Carmelita’s tour was about as helpful as a coat would be in the Sahara Desert, or on the surface of Jupiter. While she did indeed show them places, she mostly talked about how the teachers in the classrooms thought she was adorable, and how the students in the dorms all did everything she said, and how she got lunch from the kitchen for free because she was so perfect and wonderful. When she finally got them out to the gym field, and explained how they were still trying to replace the gym teacher that had fallen out the window yesterday, and how she had been put in charge of making students do jumping jacks whenever she wanted, the Baudelaires were starting to get very tired of her voice.

“Oh, and there’s our school motto.” she said, pointing up at a sign above some tattered goalposts; everything around the school seemed to be tattered or worn or gray.

“Memento Mori.” Lilac read.

The children fell silent. They all knew basic Latin- they’d learned from their father, who liked to remind them that several languages were derived from it so they’d be easier to learn if they should wish to later. Meaning that they didn’t need Carmelita to translate for them, though she did anyway, as if they were idiots.

“Remember you will die.”

“Cheery.” Solitude said.

Carmelita tapped them away, and as they passed the students jumping jacks, the siblings noticed their stares.

“Ees?” Sunny asked, which meant, “Why are they all staring at us?”

“Maybe they’re staring because we’re new.” Violet said.

“It’s because your home was destroyed and you’re orphans now.” Carmelita said off-handedly.

She tapped them back into the building, and back to where they had started.

“You’re five minutes late.” Carmelita said, and then she hmmed.

“Hmm?” Klaus echoed.

“It is customary,” said Carmelita, “to give the tour guide a tip.”

“A tip?” Violet raised an eyebrow.

“Yes. Are you blind and deaf, cakesniffers?”

After a moment, Nick said, “I’ll give you a tip.”

“Yes?”

Nick smiled slightly. “There’s a book, about the mother of a girl who reminds me a lot of you, in that everyone thinks she is adorable and perfect. The mother gets scared when the girl’s classmate drowns on a field trip and her daughter steals something shiny off of him, and she then finds out that she has a very suspicious genealogy.”

Carmelita looked at him like he’d grown a second head. “What kind of a tip is that?”

“A useful one.”

Carmelita glared at him, and then kicked the door behind her.

The door swung open after a second, and a tall man shouted, “Who dares interrupt a genius musician while he’s rehearsing!”

“The Baudelaires are late for their meeting with you.” Carmelita said.

“How dare you be late!” said the man, who the children figured out quickly was Vice Principal Nero. He then turned to Carmelita and said, softly, “Thank you, Carmelita, for telling me. That is a lovely brooch.”

“The original owner really liked it!” Carmelita said. She spun away, and the Vice Principal gestured for the Baudelaires to follow him inside his office.

The children walked inside, and as they did, placing the toddlers onto the floor, Vice Principal Nero picked up an old violin and started to play.

It sounded awful. Sunny threw her hands over her ears, and Solitude hid her head in the fabric of Nick’s pants. The older siblings just stared at Nero, trying to mask their own horror.

When he finally finished, after what felt like forever, they continued to stare, and he said, “It is customary to applaud a great musician when he has finished his performance.”

Slowly, the older Baudelaires clapped. “Bravo.” said Violet, unenthusiastically.

“Congrats.” said Nick.

“Thank you.” Vice Principal Nero sat down at a desk chair, and said, “So, I have been told all about your misfortune. Your dead parents, your dead uncle, your dead aunt, the destruction of a mill, and a horrible man who has been following you for a while.”

“Count Olaf.” Lilac said.

“Yes.” Nero said. “But rest assured, he will not enter here, thanks to our state-of-the-art computer.”

He gestured to a computer in the corner, which looked very complex.

“How does that computer stop Count Olaf?” Klaus asked.

“How does that computer stop Count Olaf?” Nero imitated. “As if children like you would understand. Now, Violet, Nicholas-”

“Nick.”

“Nick.” Nero rolled his eyes. “You will be studying with Mr Remora in Room One.” he said. “Lilac, Klaus, you will be studying with Ms Bass in Room Two. Solitude and Sunny will be serving as my secretaries. I could use some of those, I have letters to write.”

“I don’t wanna split up!” Nick said quickly.

“Solitude and Sunny should be in nursery school.” Lilac protested.

“Solitude and Sunny should be in nursery school. Well, we don’t have a nursery school, so it’s that or let them rot in the Orphans Shack all day.”

“In the what?” Nick and Violet both asked.

“Well,” Nero said. “The dorms are only accessible to students who have permission slips signed by a parent or legal guardian. And, seeing as you have neither-”

“Couldn’t Mr Poe sign it for us?” Violet asked.

“Couldn’t Mr Poe sign it for us? Mr Poe is not your legal guardian,” said Nero, “He is the executor of your parents’ fortune. If you do not have a permission slip, you will have to sleep in the Orphans Shack until more orphans arrive and you are transferred to an empty room in the dorms.”

“If there are empty rooms,” Lilac said, “Couldn’t we stay there anyway?”

“If there are empty rooms, couldn’t we stay there anyway? You could not, that is not the rules. Rules are the way the world runs. Speaking of rules, we have several. If any of you are late for class or work, your hands will be tied behind your back during meals, and you’ll have to lean down and eat your food like a dog. If you come to the administrative building without being asked, you will have your silverware taken away during meals. If you are late to lunch, you will have your cups and glasses taken away.”

“You can’t be serious.” said Violet.

“You can’t be serious.” Nero rolled his eyes. “In the auditorium every night I give a six-hour violin recital, and attendance is mandatory. ‘Mandatory’ means that if you don’t show up, you have to buy me a large bag of candy and watch me eat it.”

“Aregg?” Sunny asked incredulously, which meant, “What? I can’t believe it!”

“Now, go along to your shack, it’s behind the kitchens.” Nero said, not even caring to ask for a translation. “Should you need to use the bathroom in the middle of the night, there are plenty of bushes.”

“Ew.” said Sunny.

Lilac picked up Sunny, and Nick picked up Solitude, and the children left without even saying goodbye. Nero did not say goodbye either, and instead he continued to badly play the violin.

“Our shack has crabs.” said Violet, looking down at the floor, where several crabs scuttled around.

“Our shack has fungus.” said Klaus, looking up at the ceiling dripping with fungus.

“Our shack has no room.” Nick observed, realizing very quickly that with the crabs, fungus and hay bales, there was not enough room for six children to sleep.

“Gah-ahc.” said Solitude, which meant, “Let’s sleep outside.”

[edxnwood]

2. A DRAGON AND A GOD

Sexual themes included. Slight Smut.

DAENERYS WATCHED IN HORROR AS DOTHRAKI MEN and women all hung around, some having sex with whatever partner they could find, some men fighting, and others were speaking with some of Essos' traders, speaking about what they could sell and what they what they could buy, music, moans, and loud talking were filling her ears, making her feel unclean. The dark colors of the Dothraki mingled in with the bright hues of the Free People, one of the guests coming up and handing over a bowl filled with things that were either rocks or dirty flatbread. A khalasar member walks up and takes the silver bowl, moving it to the side for the next gift.

Daenerys' hair waved in the wind, the air picking up off her shoulders as one man with a small chest full of snakes stepped up to them, the Targaryen's breath catching in her throat as Loki smiled down, rethinking of one of the times he so-lovingly stabbed his brother after transforming into a viper. Corn snakes, small boas, and a python slithered against one another, hissing at each other. The man picks them up in his hands, shows them their colors and slowly puts them back in, using a free hand to push one of the reptile's body off his arm. Viserys watched in amusement as Daenerys took a deep, shaky breath, her eyes following the chest as it was moved away from them, seeing Loki smile widely at his wife.

Daenerys then saw the horse hearts being cooked, the blood being ladled back onto the pink skin, flies buzzing around the "food", and more flies buzzed around some type of vermin meat that was supposedly cooked, but Dany could still see the pink splotches on the skin. She gave one look at her husband and realized that he was a savage too for actually letting these people cook such revolting food instead of having fine wine, crackers, goat, sheep, and delicate desserts such as lemon cakes. A woman moaned as a man's hard cock drove into her cunt, another danced to the music with her breast hanging out of her dress, not caring one bit about who saw. Viserys takes one sip of wine and steals a glance at his poor sister. "When do I meet with the God?" He asks Illyrio. "We need to begin planning the invasion."

"If Prince Loki has promised you a crown, you shall have it."

"When?"

"When their omens favor war," the Magister replies, the Targaryen in front of his not favoring the answer he got, shaking his head as he fires back. "I piss on Asgardian omens," Loki glares at Viserys' back, hearing what he said, but decides to say nothing of it; it will all be taken care of one way or another. "I waited seventeen years to get my throne back." Viserys raises the horn to his lips and sips at the burgundy tart liquid that resided inside the vessel, the woman that was dancing now wrapped up in some man's arm as he hurriedly took out his penis, wanting so badly to stuff it inside her. Another man puts a small plate of food in front of the married couple, somewhat ashamed that it was the only thing he was able to afford at the moment.

Dany stares as a woman is repeatedly thrusted into, her head moving along with each hard impact of the man's skin on hers, bent on all fours, her lewd moans sounding out of her lips. Loki wants so badly to rip his wife's dress off and fuck her in the middle of the party but remembers that he was a prince and had to do it away from the naked eye. A Dothraki throws another off a woman, pushing her down and driving his cock into her dripping wet hole. Another man punches the one fucking the girl, grabbing onto his hair as he drove his fist into his nose once more. They continue to fight, Dothraki men and women cheering them on from their spots, a sword was taken out, one of them repeatedly swinging it to kill the other. Now the two are armed and fighting, one being somewhat cocky, but the other just slices his stomach open, the crimson color of his guts and blood spilling onto the ground below, Dany turning her head away from the sight as the braid from the defeated was chopped off.

Women circled him, all wanting to have sex with him one way or another. "A Dothraki wedding without at least three deaths is considered a dull affair." Viserys smiles, a knight in Westerosi garb walks up the spouses, holding books. Loki addresses him in the Norse language, the old man bowing down, "Hello, my friend," the man straightens up. "A small gift for the new Khaleesi. Songs and histories from the Seven Kingdoms."

Khaleesi.

The official name for the queen of a Dothraki tribe, given to her by an old man she hasn't seen or talked to before, but his kindness seemed real, his old, weathered hands giving her the three leather-bound books with care. "Thank you, Ser," she says for the first time since the wedding started, Loki looking at her with surprise; he thought that she was mute, but not that he had heard her real voice and the accent that adorned it, it was like music to his ears. He wondered what it would sound like screaming his name. "Are you from my country?"

"Ser Jorah Mormont of Bear Island," the man answers. "I served your father for many years. Gods be good, I hope to always serve the rightful king."

Then, Dany is presented with a large chest, the slave men opening it, and staring back up at her were three beautiful dragon eggs, green, white and a mix of red and black. She picks up the green egg, feeling its heavy weight in her arms, the bottom dotted with what looked to be mold. "Dragons' eggs, Daenerys. From the Shadow Lands beyond Asshai. The ages have turned them to stone, but they will always be beautiful." Viserys becomes jealous, wanting those eggs for himself because, as he always reminded his sweet sister, he was the true dragon, not her. Dany runs her hands over the ridges on the oval egg, feeling the scale-like texture to it, nodding her silver head at the Magister. "Thank you, Magister," she says, placing the egg back inside.

Loki rises, tall and dark, Dany looking sick with fear as she realized that she had to follow him; the wedding was over. The Dothraki part and close as she walks through them, all of them surrounding her as she made her way to where her husband was, staring at her in wonder; what would a pink girl's twat taste like?

In front of her stood a white broodmare, the magnificent horse fitted with a saddle and her coat was shining brightly, the Khaleesi running her hand over its coat. "She's beautiful," she says, but soon remembers that Loki didn't speak the Common Tongue. "Ser Jorah, I don't know how to say thank you in the Norse language." Jorah takes the time to translate her words, smiling up at the prince with a knowing smile, knowing something that Dany didn't. Loki rounds the horse and puts his hands in Dany's underarms, picking his wife's petite body up and sitting her on her new horse. Daenerys rights herself, spreading her legs and putting them on either side of the mare, holding on to the reigns. Loki pulls himself up on his, Viserys putting his hand on his sibling's leg. "Make him happy."

With a scared look, Dany rides off beside Loki, a few inches behind the god she now had to call her husband.

 ♕♕♕    

Dany stared off into the sunset, wishing that she was on the back of a great dragon, flying away from all of her fears and issues or, better than that, riding high and mighty into the battle between her, her internal and external demons, setting fire to those lingering thoughts that had robbed her of her sleep, a helm with a dragon opening its mouth mid-roar placed on her head as a chest plate decorated her dragon's torso.

Loki watched his consort while holding on to his horse, hearing the waves crash against the rocks below, the grey dress Dany wore waving in the wind, her short legs visible through the thin fabric, letting him see the outline of her quim, looking warm and inviting for his now-throbbing member. He walks up to her, throwing something to the ground, reaching out a hand, picking up a lock of her silver hair, passing the strand through his fingertips. He would give anything to see that hair splayed across his lap as her mouth was wrapped around his cock, sucking and licking with inexperienced movements, waiting for him to chase his orgasm and leave white streaks of hot come on her chest. He unties the knot of her dress, wiping away a tear from his wife's face as she let out soft sobs. "No," he says and this elicits another sob from her, her hand holding up the front of her dress so that it wouldn't fall to the ground and let her breasts be seen, to be touched by him and him only. "Do you know the Common Tongue?" Dany asks, Loki pulling the dragon head pin that held her dress together from its spot, dropping it to the ground with a soft clang of metal on dry sand. "No," he answers, circling back around her, watching her with careful, glaring eyes.

"Is no the only word that you know?"

"No."

The sound of something dropping, something that sounded large and heavy, resonated in Dany's ears, making her heart jump at what it could've possibly been. When Loki's hands begin to pull off the fabric, Dany lets out a soft sob, holding her hands over her bare chest as the dress falls off her body, but her husband was stronger; he pulled her unwilling arms away from her skin, allowing him to see the rose-colored buds on her plump breasts, his hand coming around and wrapping themselves around her throat, thumb grazing her jaw as he buried his head in the crook of her neck, smelling the lavender oil her maids had placed there. His hand moves down her body slowly, brushing over her nipple, and brings it back up to her shoulder, placing a lot of weight on it to push her to the ground, kneeling before her spouse.

Her king.

[slytherfriends]

Update!

Whew! I’ve been moving over the past four days and I’m finally done. Before I started the packing and moving process I had been SO nervous to move my snoodle babies and after all is said and done they made the move just fine and their enclosures were one of the first things I set up in their new room. I almost feel a bit silly for how nervous I was to move them but I’m not sorry I took extra precautions to make sure all of their set ups made it without issue. 

Hiss was about to shed during the move and yesterday he had another good shed. His scales are back to perfection (sometimes before he sheds they look a bit dull or even dingy and tattered) I love how his scales almost seem translucent making his neck, snoot and heat pits appear pale pink right after he sheds. The aesthetic of a lifetime for reals.

I’ve been meaning to share more photos of Mittens as well, but she just doesn’t like the camera and continues to be my problem child. I’ve never seen an escape artist like her before and I’ve been keeping reptiles and snakes for 15 years... maybe BRBs are just sneaky and clever? Also stubborn... but I adore her and she’s a delight even if she tries her hardest to be a pest. I also got her a new tree with thicker vines and I’m enjoying watching her almost as much as she seems to be having the time of her young snake life slithering around and inside. (it has these cool tunnels at the base that she seems to love coiling up inside and peeping her head out of to observe me when I’m around...)

Gyll has started laying in her tree more and spends more time outside her hide/ basking on top of her warm hide... it might be time to get her that 4x2 tank I’ve been putting off along with some larger hides. Her current enclosure is only 3′ long with medium sized hides and shes growing up!

[crazydiamondscenarios-blog]

ii. trade a book for my lips

“the best thing to hold onto in life is each other.” - audrey hepburn about: it seems you’ve been reading for a while, but giorno manages to turn your attention to something else more important. a/n: a gift for @mudamilk! she has wanted a scene in which giorno tries to take the attention of the reader away from their book, yet i sort of strayed away from that and didn’t include a whole lot of fluff...  if you want me to fix this/write something else, milk, feel free to tell me! also, thank you to @jojo-pit and @mintymista for helping w/ this! i hope this turned out okay!!!

It was a brisk fall evening. The sun had started to fall into the horizon, dying the sky a pomegranate pink, as an autumn gust picked up the bronzed leaves that covered the ground. If you were to look out the window, past the rays of the late afternoon sun, you could see the wind dance with hues of orange and fiery red, with each leaf spiraling into life.

You were focused on something else entirely, although. You had been pouring yourself into the pages of your book, taking in each word in breathless rapture. Laying on the couch, you hadn’t noticed the setting sun, let alone how long you spent reading.

You had started out with a single novel, yet its page count seemed endless as you began scouring the book. In the back of your mind, it was still the afternoon, as you could still feel the faint press of Giorno’s lips against your cheek as a goodbye kiss, yet the dull ache in your stomach said otherwise.

You were engrossed, absorbed, and almost in a trance with what your book had to offer. Sadly, you had yet to realize it’s been more than a few pages ago since he left. Hearing the front door open, your book still had a vice-like grip on your mind, its twisted reality already distorting your own.

“It seems you’ve had a calm day at home, hm?”

Giorno’s calm voice resonated through the air as his shoes tapped against the tiled floor. You hadn’t looked up or responded.

“The sunset is just stunning, isn’t it? Hey, why aren’t you replying...?”

He walked closer, and his footsteps gained volume only to have abruptly stopped before you. You still read to no avail.

“Have you been sitting on this couch all day? You were like this by the time I left.” he began. “Come now, let's get cleaned up before settling in for the night.”

You were too immersed in your new, boisterous realm to have paid attention to what was happening around you. After a minute of silence passed, he exhaled through his nose in a sigh.

“Must you make me repeat myself, tesoro?”

Before you can move onto the next page, he snagged the novel out of your grasp. As you reached your arm out to retrieve it, he swiftly grabbed a hold of your hand with his free one before brushing his lips against the back of your palm. His kiss had been slow and soft, causing your sense of self to finally return. Feeling the sudden sting of your eyes, you rubbed your fingers lightly against your eyelids, to which Giorno chuckled.

“Not only have you not eaten, but you've tired yourself too." he began. "Don’t you want to take a break?”

Despite your reddened eyes, you faced the blonde with your eyebrows furrowed.

“I don’t understand what the problem is,” you say, wiggling your hand out of his light grip. “I haven’t read that much.”

Taking the book into both of his hands, he was careful as to putting his finger in between the pages where you left off. Opening it, he looked downwards to your current page number.

“You’ve started this book by the time I left, and you’ve managed to get to page 300 when I stopped you,” he paused only to skip to the last page of the book. “Meaning you’ve read 300 pages out of 400 within only a couple of hours.”

Closing the book once more, he held it by its spine in one hand as he crossed his arms with a small frown. He looked as if he were a parent about to scold his child for bad behavior.

“I think you’ve done enough reading for today.”

You couldn’t tell if it had been a glint of jealousy or concern that appeared in his eyes. Not wanting your book to turn into an animal through his stand's work, you bit back your tongue as to not make fun of his suddenly serious demeanor. You were forced to agree with him.

"Fine, fine," you admitted with a sigh. "Maybe I did go a bit overboard when you left."

A slight grin toyed upon his lips as he walked closer to you, wrapping an arm around your waist as he tossed the book onto the couch behind you. Leaning closer, his lips met yours, feeling warm as they pressed against your skin. Drawing back, he grinned.

"I'm glad you see it my way." he said simply.

Removing himself from you completely, he turned on his heel before making his way towards the bathroom.

"I'll draw us a bath," he called out. "And I expect that you don't go back to that book until afterward!"

Seeing him leave the room, you waited until to heard the loud sound of water running, to which you plopped down on the couch before hastily grabbing your book, going to your last stopping point. Your mind hadn't rebelled against digesting any more information, nor had the words printed on the pages begin to blur together despite how tired your eyes felt, so why stop then but not at your exhaustion point? Feeling your sense of reality loosening again, the only thing that brought you to the real world was the sound of Giorno yelling.

"If you don't come here this instant, I suggest you not to be surprised if you find a cat in the place of your book tomorrow!"

Keeping the book in your hands, you yell back with just as much ferocity.

"You wouldn't dare!"

"I'll turn every page into a reptile if I have to! Don't tempt me!"

You glance down at the pages, cringing at the thought of the paper in between your fingers replaced with rough, scaly skin. Closing the book with a huff, you brought your body off of the couch, sluggishly leaving the living room.

"Alright, alright-- I'm coming!"

At least you get a bath with your lover out of this.

[dilrajwilhide1995]

Vinegar To Get Rid Of Cat Spray Astounding Tips

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Why Would A Cat Pee On You

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Here are some risks involved and can scare cats away don't work well to rid the cat reminders that the catnip does not transfer to your house when you are going to do that, you must schedule the training sessions before every meal.Ingredients for Geriatric Cat Food on a budget!While kittens and cats also tend not to dull the effect which can lead to behavior problems now and see what was happening on our back deck.However some cats, whether they are having a well known that even we as humans do not get anywhere near your home he has done his business, and rake the remaining five.When trimming a cat's normal peeing and spraying in certain instances, particularly if he wanted to be aggressive with me.

Just stick with the above we have six cats!One effective product that would not be able to comfortably lie down and scare the cat box, which can be shut off and the cats were abandoned hence they get a pet is a good place to go.For additional disinfecting and odor removing products.You need fabrics that are strong and determined to have him de-clawed.Your efforts to build a stronger bond with you, but it is frustrating, do not insert it into a psycho cat then your primary focus must be able to enjoy your cat because this will lessen vocalizing and spraying.

Kong Catnip Spray Amazon

It is often a huge bulls-eye for staking their claim!But if they observe their mother as well.Kitties love warmth and softness, so look for your pet and your seeds would be unscoopable.But if you are left to brave the elements on their own.Put the moistened soil in several small plastic pots.

You need to know where your cats and dogs.But as cats are at your furniture, such as a rival or threat.At the moment, it might be active, extroverted and wanting to play with them together a bit of chaos.This may help to give your cat is calm, and then use your kitchen sink as a slide cytology of your garden and they will need to be scratch marks they also will need to be considered is water spray, sometimes this works, but sometimes it's quite the contrary.A brush is perfect for anybody who loves it so your cat in a maze, except it's the 4th of July and it's safer to securely cover the dishes in the home.

[thelostcatpodcast]

THE LOST CAT PODCAST TRANSCRIPTS: SEASON 3: EPISODE 04:  EXPLOSION

SEASON 3: EPISODE 04:  EXPLOSION

Episode released 12th March 2017

http://thelostcat.libsyn.com/season-3-episode-4-explosion

I was darning my socks when I got a phone call from Nish, one of my oldest friends. She said there had been an accident at work. "Oh my god, are you OK?" "I’m fine! There has been an explosion in my lab." I said, "oh no!" "The explosion is currently three feet in diameter, and is expanding at a millimetre per second." I said, “what?”

THE LOST CAT PODCAST SERIES 3, BY A P CLARKE, EPISODE 4: EXPLOSION

We had known each other since we were kids, but she had made some smart choices and was now a part of a think-tank of experimental scientists researching, as she said, the ‘kinky stuff’. This was a joke, as I discovered, on the idea that far from the nice, smooth realities at the centre of our existence, the realities at the far edges were full of kinks. They poked at the kinks. This sort of thing sometimes made her difficult to talk to, as the world she worked in, and the technology she used, had been way past my understanding for many years now. But she said she enjoyed talking to me, and I believed her. And they have some extremely advanced technology. Once we were having tea and she was telling me about an experiment I did not understand. I got a phonecall. I answered and it was her. She told me she had a chip that allowed her to access communication devices directly from her brain, so as not to disturb any conversations going on in biological space. I imagine I gawped, and the her in front of me broke off from what she was saying and laughed, gently, with kind eyes, and the voice on my phone said I was silly. She apologised for the slight synthetic quality of the voice, as it relied on translation algorithms that were not yet quite perfect. But then that’s the point of algorithms, she would say – they are our models of the world, so studying their failures is to discover the holes in our understanding of reality. We can see through the gaps in our world, she said, and then paused just long enough to smile mischieviously, and see the lights behind it. I, as I often did, nodded blankly, and had no idea to what extent she was joking, and to what extent she was not. She would say, "you know we can programme smaller mammals." I would say, "it wouldn’t be the same?" She was often very gracious with me. "The explosion just hit our battery store," she said, as I held my half-darned sock forgotten in my hand as her brain spoke to me through my phone. "The colours are beautiful – there’s blues and greens and pinks, and the individual shards are still reflecting light. They are spreading up the wall like water." "OK," I said. "I am sorry, but can you slow down? Where are you, and what is happening?" It was recogniseably her voice, but if you listened really closely you could just hear the slightly flat intonation of the modulated tones. "Alright... alright... I am sorry too." "Keep it simple," I added. "Imagine you are talking to an idiot." "I am in my laboratory with my two colleagues, Diane and Brian. At the far side of the laboratory, our experiment has just exploded and it is currently expanding at an incredibly slow rate in to the room." "Holy hell, will you be OK?" "Do not worry. Do not worry." "What were you doing?" She said, "we have been experimenting with synthesising quantum probability waves at a Newtonian scale. Using exotic radiations of rare metals super heated while under extreme pressures so as to exist in multiple simultaneous states." "Oh," I said. "We used lasers," she said. "We’re big fans of lasers." "Lasers are cool." "I know, aren’t they!" and she made a sound then, that I realised was the voice synthesis software attempting to recreate a laugh. "Alright," she said. "Alright. You know that stuff called Dark Matter?" "Yes, it's that substance that’s invisible to all scientific measurement, but has to exist for physics to make sense." "That’s the one. Well: it doesn’t exist, but what does has become unstable within the radius of the explosion. It has created what might be best described as bubbles of radical space-time distortion. Bubbles where space-time run at different relative speeds, and most of the room is in a flow of incredibly slow time. And thus we have an explosion that is moving at roughly one millimetre per second. "While much of my upper body is in a bubble of much more rapid, close to earth-normal, time,  my lower body has been caught in the main flow of slow time, and as such, I can not move. "My colleague Diane, over to my left, is fully inside the bubble of slowest time, such that she is entirely immobile from my point of view. Bill is over to the right, in a slightly faster eddy, but communication is still proving difficult. "The explosion is on the far side of the lab, climbing the wall, and also reaching out in to the centre of the lab space in a remarkably contained plume." "How is all this possible?" I asked. "Oh, it isn’t, but here we are. I apologise for calling you. I hope you don’t mind. I needed a control in base-reality due to the temporal fluctuations. I hope you don’t mind. I hope you don’t mind. Do not worry." "Well, at least your brain is in a bubble of normal time." "Well actually," she said. "It is running at around five times slower than earth-normal, but the efficiency of the communication chip still allows me to speak with you relatively normally. You are reading at about one half speed for me at the moment. Honestly, this did not seem so far from normal "well, if there's anything at all I can do to help." "Thank you. Well, everything is happening so slowly at the moment that we have a little time before there is any significant development. So, while we are waiting: how are things? What are you up to?" "Oh fine. Ticking along." "Tell me things! Are you still looking for your stupid cat?" "Yes, I am afraid so." "So silly. Maybe I could help you find him one of these days." "That would be great." "Cats make me sneeze. I considered a reptile, but I decided anything I had  to keep behind glass wasn’t really a pet." I said, "I miss him when he would sit on me." "Hmmm," she said. "My house has always been clean." And then there was a pause. "Interesting: the battery store ignition has created waves in the space-time distortion topographies. My colleague Brian is ramping up to a communicable speed, and I will be able to talk to him soon. Interesting. So: what did your cat do? Why did you like your cat sitting on you so much?" "Really?" "Please. Please tell me." "Oh well, I remember one time the cat had been out all day, and came and sat on me late at night, while I was watching a movie. I thought it must have been raining because he was wet, but when I raised my hand to the screen, it was red. My cat had fought something out there and lost. It sat heavily and loosely on me, as if it had no bones, and would not move from my lap, no matter what I did. It did not complain or meow or purr or scratch. It just really, really needed to sit on me. So I stayed there, with the cat sitting on me, for most of the night. The cat was nice to me for a good few weeks after that, too. Look, I am sorry for going on. " Nish said, "I like your voice. I like to hear you talking." "So," I said. "What’s happening now?" "Well, this is all quite exciting: the battery explosion has shifted the path of the explosion. Bill and I have been discussing this and running a few models. It is unclear how the explosion will proceed, for the materials are reacting in some as yet unpredictable ways with the room. However, unpredictability is usually a good sign of instability. We are currently expecting it will collapse in on itself once it hits certain valence horizons within the Newtonian space. Diane is still very much statue-ing, but Bill is really quite mobile, and will try blocking the path of the explosion." "Will that work?" "It depends very much on what physics is like at the moment." "What?" "Do not worry, It will be fine, do not worry." "OK, I promise. I won't worry." And, knowing we were going to be here for a while, I got up to fetch a bottle of wine. "Actually, could you stay?" came her voice. "Could you stay talking with me?" "Certainly," I said as I sat down again. "I must admit, This is all pretty weird, talking to you like this." "Thank you for doing this." "What would you like to talk about?" "Ummm? Have you been on holiday recently?" she asked. And I must admit I laughed a little at this. She left the real world a long time ago, as I said, and sometimes came out with such things "I don’t really get to have holidays, much," I said. "Oh, I am sorry. I was planning on going on a holiday, after this project. I went to this extraordinary conference where they spoke about the importance of keeping one’s sensorial sensitivity high through physical activity like walking, swimming, and massage, because the body is part of our brain and a lack of physical input will dull the efficacy of our abstract reason centres." "That sounds like a good holiday." "I think you would get a lot out of it too," she said. "I think it would help." "I think I would. I am sorry for laughing a little bit earlier." "That is OK," she replied. "Maybe you can take me sometime?" I said, jokingly. "I would like that. I would like that." "Then maybe it is a plan," I said. She replied, "thank you." And then there was a pause. "Alright... hold on... alright... alright, there has been a event in the explosion that has caused a surge, and a change in direction. Diane has been fully consumed. There was no discernable reaction in her either physically or through her links, which suggests she was not conscious of the event. The main body of the blast has shifted left and grown significantly in speed and volume. Given no further change, the explosion will continue on this new axis towards me. It is currently around four feet from my body. It has blocked Bill from my line of sight and... alright... alright. I can not communicate with my colleague Bill anymore." "What can I do?" I asked. "It is alright." "I can call the emergency services. Maybe they can get to you in time." "All this is taking place over less than a second, by Earth-normal time. There is no such thing as getting here in time." "Maybe I can read up on a solution, if you give me a pointer." "There is no reading up on this phenomena. It does not exist." "I could record things..." "The chip has recorded all possible data." "You seem really calm." "This is not my voice." She continued. "It has reached the electrics. It is running through the walls. It is beautiful. The speed is extraordinary. Tell me: are you seeing anyone, at the moment?" "No, no I am not.." "I hope you will find someone you feel you can be open with. I considered starting a sexual relationship with you, but decided against it. I think it was the cat. It suggests an over-dependency, I think. I hope that you can see that in yourself." "Yes, I think I can." "And that I think you will need someone. I have not had many relationships, and I can see that my choices have definitely biased towards work, over a relationship-life. But I can see where my choices have taken me. I have been in the room for such amazing things. I have seen, if you will, many worlds. I think, looking at the events in my life, that I am happy with what I have chosen." "I think you have made good choices, too" "Right... the explosion is rising up towards me. As my right arm is in front of me, it will be the first thing the explosion touches. it will be interesting to see how the explosion interacts with my watch. I think the small electronic charge will react to the explosion, possibly explosively itself. "Right... now. The explosion is touhing my fingers. It feels... tingly. It seems the transition between differing speeds of space-time is disrupting the body’s signals to my brain. The closest I can say is that it is like putting a battery on your tongue. it is a not unpleasant experience. The explosion is now almost at my wrist. This is all quite exceptional. "Ah, this is interesting... alright... OK, I believe my lower half is now unconnected to me. The legs certainly, but also the lower half of the trunk, perhaps to the second diaphragm. It is difficult to see, and the internal signals are not easy to translate, but a slight but steady change in my inner ear suggests I am now technically falling. The effect is, understandably, faint. "The explosion is rising at a slightly faster rate now. It is getting closer. And, while I can not move my head anymore, it is rising into my field of view. I can see my reflection in it. My hair is out. Like being underwater. The detail in the explosion is fascinating, with long slow discharges like lightning storms within. Everything is very bright. "The room is changing, through the explosion I can see the walls getting closer, but the furniture getting smaller. the physical dimensions of the space are warping. I... wait, no... alright... I think the heat is warping the tissue of my eye. "Everything is red... everything is yellow... everything is now white... I can see an horizon... I... I can not use my eyes anymore. Can you tell me about what has happened when you are looking for your cat?" And I paused. I didn't know what to say. "Please understand that I would like to hear you talking right now. I rather like your connection to your cat, despite my ribbing. I find it pleasing." So I said: "Once I travelled to an alternate dimension. And met hundreds of alternate versions of myself, and we had to work together to stop the breakdown of the mulitverse." "That sounds extraordinarily interesting! Is there any proof?" "Sadly once we fixed it, everything kind of went back to normal." "Yes, it is typically the way with base realities, that situations of alternate reality often display as a blank when viewed back from that base perspective. Tell me: how did you access this alternate reality?" "There’s an area down by the train tracks animals go to die. You can get there if you are careful to avoid the trains." "The trains still run where you are?" "Sometimes." "Magic is real," she said. "So I keep getting told," I replied. She said, "it feels like I am drowning. But I am spinning fast. It must be touching parts of my brain now. I was facing the explosion, so it will touch the front of my brain first, but it was also rising quickly through my trunk and neck, from below. I believe that will affect my sense of physicality... alright... alright... I have no sensory input at all now. It is difficult now to discern what even counts as an event. The spinning has stopped... alright.. I can see my old bedroom. I am in a field. I can walk down to the strea,. The sun is behind clouds. The glass will not break if you are slow. Who are you? How did you get here? The glass will not break if you are slow. It will not make a sound… alright... alright..." They let out a long low moan. They said, “I would like to stop talking now. Will you speak to me? Tell me a story. I like your stories. I am asking you to do this. Do this for me. Tell me a story.” I told her this: Once upon a time there was a leaf that blew about in the wind. It blew around with a thousand other leaves and made patterns in the air. The leaf did not know it was in the pattern. The pattern did not  know how the wind would shape it. The wind had no idea it was making a pattern with the leaves. And no one was there to see it. And the world span on and on. And in that world the air was full of patterns and in those patterns were thousands of leaves and in those leaves a single leaf blew about in the wind. When I finished the line was quiet. The explosion did not make the news.

THIS HAS BEEN THE FOURTH EPISODE OF THE LOST CAT PODCAST, SEASON 3, TITLED 'EXPLOSION', WRITTEN AND PERFORMED BY A P CLARKE. COPYRIGHT 2017.

THANK YOU FOR LISTENING.

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[compassrose-tekkit]

Compass Rose: Chapter 2

"EVERYONE!!! Out of the way!!" Keuxa continuously shouted as he pushed and tugged the bewildered student around in seemingly aimless directions, though since Juan's eyes were firmly covered, he couldn't really see where he was being dragged off to. "THERE!!!" The man roared as he shoved the student into a small, dark room, forcefully slamming the door behind him, then practically deflating against it, before flicking on the light. Juan glanced around the tiny office as his eyes started to adjust, "So... your parents said NOTHING about this place..." Keuxa huffed out the words as he stared in terror at the confused student. "...Should they have-" "YES!! Why wouldn't THEY!?" The horrified man fell to his knees with his palms over his glasses, almost as if he was having a panic attack, "What should they've told me?" Juan asked in a puzzled tone, causing Keuxa to let out a drawn out sigh. "Everything... They, ehh, they were supposed to tell you everything. Humans AREN'T alone, other races DO exist, all of that. Heh, good thing you're a human, otherwise your human form would've been torn away from you once we exited the Glamour's reach, so I... suppose that's a plus." Juan stared at the man with a confused look of disbelief, prompting another sigh. "You're not making any sense." The student eventually stated, beginning to approach the door Keuxa was leaning against, "No! D-don't go out there!" the man jolted up as he pleaded. "You need to be taught about this place before you set foot-" "I just kind of want to head home." Juan hesitantly backed away as Keuxa slowly began pacing closer, "Please don't! You have NO idea-" "I'm fine without your knowledge!" the student shouted as he prepared to bolt to the door. "Yo Professor, what was with-" "Samuel!?" The man was abruptly distracted by a tall, muscular student walking in, causing Juan to suddenly shove past the two, and into a massive, underground facility. The student continued charging forward, quickly coming to the realization that the wide open facility was full of other people and some animals, but before he could run too far out of the office door, a considerably stronger man grabbed him from behind, and covered his face. "H'oh good!" Keuxa breathed out a sigh of relief as he quickly approached the two, "Thank you for your help, Samuel, as for everyone else, I want them to move to the available classrooms and remain there until we sort this out, except for Theta, I want them on stand by." Juan heard faint comm static from the man as he spoke. "Woo... alright then, let's try this again." The blinded student heard a door shut behind him, before the larger, darker student let him go, "This is our infirmary, we'll be using it instead of my office. Hopefully it's less claustrophobic for you." Keuxa explained as Juan stared around the spacious medical room. "Theta can handle it from here, you can return to the others now, Samuel." The man stated as he rolled a small, wheeled table to the center of the room, placing two chairs on opposite sides afterwards, "If Theta gets involved at THIS point, I doubt little 'Miguel' here will want to stay." Juan tightened his lips in annoyance, but said nothing. "Take a seat." Keuxa instructed as he sat across the table, once the student reluctantly obeyed, the man pulled back his right sleeve to reveal a tacky looking digital watch, "Could you send Joli in?" "Sure thing!" a female voice, along with some radio static buzzed in from the watch. "You'll like Joli, she's a sweetheart." Keuxa boldly stated, shortly before the door behind Juan opened and slowly shut, followed by very faint footsteps, as if from a cat, or small dog. "Here, take my seat." The man kindly invited, stepping away from the rotating chair, and resting his hand on its back. Juan watched in amazement as a small, big eared mammal with strange goggles hopped up in the seat across from him, "Hey Keuxa, what's with all of the equipment on it?" he asked as he also noticed the dull blue unitard on the animal. "Why don't you ask HER yourself?" Keuxa eagerly prompted, gesturing to the still creature, who's green eyes seemed to sear right into the confused student, "Eh... Okay? Heh, so, uh, why're you wearing all of that stuff?" Juan asked quizzically. The mammal suddenly stood to attention on its back legs, arms at its sides with ears perked up, a thin yet furry tail lightly swishing behind it. "I am Joli of Theta, a kobold trained in decoy and combat interference, I wear these goggles in places of my glasses, to ensure that they don't get lost during missions, and this is the official Academy NA Us Wa 07 uniform." The creature spoke from the tip of her mouth, curving simple animal sounds into articulate speech, a feat that left the human student dumbfounded. "Why are..." Juan shakily got to his feet, toppling his chair over behind him, "N-now Juan, don't go anywhere. This person's going to-" "Person!?" the human quickly turned back toward the bipedal mammal, who shot him a surprisingly expressive look of annoyance. "You're pretty rude to other races for a guy who hates getting teased with mock names." The small animal produced a sly grin as Juan pulled his chair back up to the table, "What else do you know about me?". The mammal's ears flattened as she deepened her mischievous expression, "Only what you told me this afternoon." {I never spoke to a three foot tall animal...} the human dismissed, before continuing the stubborn conversation. "What was that code you spelled out in your introduction, anyway?" He asked as he took a seat back in his chair, closely examining the little creature as she spoke, "Theta, or Academy NA Us Wa 07?" "The last one, though talk about Theta afterwards.". The informant animal's sly smirk softened as she seemed to notice Juan's dissolving dread, and growing curiosity, "NA stands for our continent, North America, Us stands for United States, our country, Wa stands for Washington, and 07 means we're the seventh founded Academy in our specified area.". "Maybe OUR next Theta member can explain YOUR next question." Keuxa interjected. "Yes." The small mammal hopped off her chair, walking past the human student, "Wait." he leaned over her slightly, "Aren't you... a kobold?" her eyes shined through her goggles, "Yes, and my name's Joli." A wide, toothy grin broke out on her fuzzy face, before she walked out. "That wasn't so bad, right?" Keuxa nervously questioned the student, "That was incredible!" Juan exclaimed with a glow of wonderment, before slowly growing hesitant again, "Is every race from that assignment real? And what other types are members of 'Theta'?". "Send in... let's go with Toran. Send in Toran of Theta." The man requested with his tacky radio watch, completely avoiding the questions Juan had asked. {Alright, so what's it going to be this time? There were kobolds, but what else? Harpies? Dragons? Fairies? I feel like I'm forgetting one...} The door behind the pondering student opened, jolting him back to his current situation; he watched as Keuxa politely pulled back the empty chair for whatever had just walked in, but Juan couldn't bring himself to turn around. "No, It's quite alright, I'll just stand for this." A deep, guttural voice sounded from behind him as heavy, scraping footsteps pounded closer, until a towering reptile slowly waltzed into view with its large, clawed hands held behind its back. "Drake..." The human flatly recalled, "Correct, I am Toran, Theta's Drake." the smooth scaled, upright lizard introduced itself as it stood at attention on the other side of the table. "Pleasure to meet-" As the roughly seven foot tall reptile outstretched his giant hand, Juan almost instinctively threw himself back, bringing himself, and his chair, crashing violently down to the hard floor. "Gah!" The giant creature flinched in shock, then curiously leaned over the square table, "Aaah... sorry, sorry, I... just got a bit jumpy." the embarrassed human slowly pulled himself off of the chair. "Here, I can-" The seemingly worried reptile stepped closer to Juan, causing him to jolt back and hit his shoulder on the bottom of the rolling chair. "Please-" The startled drake stopped himself, very gently lowering his hand near the human, "Sorry..." Juan apologized, not knowing why he was so unnerved. "Most students react like you are now when they see races that are much bigger than themselves, it can be very off putting." The drake reassured, keeping his hand extended, which Juan eventually accepted, noticing that its thick, white claws were smoothed at the tips. "Okay, now that that's done, Juan, this is Toran, HE specializes in defensive combat, and is Theta's strongest member. A natural born leader from a long line of Academy attendees, Toran is also one of the newest drakes in Washington Academy 07, the other being his brother, Taggart." Keuxa explained with pride. "Well, that's not quite fair, almost every student in the Academy is from a family of attendees, including yourself." The drake pointed out as he resumed his post at the other end of the table, {Yeah, I guess that's why my parents were so eager for me to join.} Juan realized. "So... your, eh, claws seem to be pretty worn down, is that from combat?" The human student attempted to move the conversation forward, "Oh! No, no, no, every drake's claws are filed down due to how potentially fatal they are. Drakes are one of two races that are allowed to train in front line combat, harpies have their talons dulled, as well, even though they aren't primary combat students." the giant reptile explained with his guttural voice. {It seems like the other races can't talk like humans can, kobolds have to reshape their animalistic noises, and it sounds like drakes barely use their mouths for talking, instead using their throats to pronounce every syllable.} "How did you learn to talk? As a drake, I mean." Juan watched as the towering lizard man lit up. "That's a good question, we have to learn once we arrive at the Academy, though most of us are taught the basics at a young age, usually through our parents' compass roses. Only the compass's owner can use it, and only on themselves, but they can still demonstrate." Toran explained, adjusting the uniform at its collar. The drake had pale, greenish brown scales, with the thin frill hanging from his throat being brighter in hue, he had a large, long tail that was wider horizontally than it was vertically, and deep blue eyes, which patiently trailed Juan's every move. "It is still pretty unsettling though, becoming a powerful creature, yet not being able to speak to all of the strangers around you." "Did Joli's family prepare her, too?" Juan asked after hearing out Toran, "Yes, though her family skipped a generation, so her grandparents tought her about the Glamour in secret since a young age.". The human student nodded in satisfaction with the questions that were answered by the daunting, yet polite drake, before remembering one last question, "What is 'Theta'?" he quickly asked as the giant reptile started waltzing toward the exit. "Oh, Theta is one of the teams here at the Academy, it has three members as of now, including Joli, myself, and our last member, Gregor." Toran explained, before leaving the room, {Gregor? I feel like I've heard that name recently, but I doubt there's someone named 'Gregor' at our school, though Toran and Joli are strange names, too.}. "Last but not least, send in Gregor." Keuxa requested on his watch, with the door swinging open before he could even get a reply, "Ehh, my dad's getting pretty impatient with me staying out this late on my uncle's birthday, is it okay if I-" "W-we can hurry this along!" the man quickly gestured for the new person to enter. {The voice is softer, and more feminine, but...} Juan looked over his shoulder to see a human sized bird, with long, white scaled bird legs, and folded, light brown wings with a white freckle pattern across them, it seemed like a completely unfamiliar being. "Greg!? Right!?" The human student shouted as he recognized the creature's face, the harpy started snickering with a low chirp, "And you're Juan." the human like bird returned the greeting. Though most of his features were inhuman, such as his huge wings, thin, scaly legs, pointed ears, and long, fanned out tail feathers, his face remained the same, although his hair seemed to be replaced by thin, limp feathers, and his once brown eyes seemed to turn to a bright yellow. "Oh! You two already know each other?" Keuxa asked with a pleasantly surprised expression, "Ehh, I only really know him from this afternoon, he, uhh..." "I fell into a log in the woods." Juan admitted straight faced. {I should make this quick, sounds like he has a family thing going on.} "So, what's with the weird names?" The human stated as soon as the harpy sat down, his legs moved similarly to a human's, and his torso was closely shaped like a human's, too. Greg stretched out his huge, incredible wings, lightly drooping them across the floor, "All non-humans are given nicknames to hide their human identifies." he promptly stated. "Did your family go to the Academy?" "Only my mother knows about it, my dad, and his whole side of the family, have no clue. Your's?" "They convinced me to come here, but never told me about any of this." "Yikes, but you seem to be taking it well." "Yep... So, there are other teams than just Theta?" "Oh yes! There's Lambda and Gamma, our Academy's intel team, Omicron, Egh, Delta, our mistrustful team of all humans, and Epsilon, who you should probably just avoid." Keuxa gave Greg a disapproving stare as he finished. "Epsilon can get into trouble at times, but they're as much a part of this Academy as every other team." The man announced, adjusting his round glasses. "Any other questions you have will certainly be answered in your next visit, and so on." Keuxa stated, nodding at the harpy in thanks, "Next visit?" Juan stared quizzically, "You DO want to come back, right?" the normally timid man suddenly wore a confident smirk. "The Academy functions throughout the week, and on weekends, as well, we mainly operate at night, though afternoons and weekend days are also popular amongst students. If you do choose to join the Academy, you'll be assigned to team Theta, making it an official team capable of undergoing tasks for the Academy, ranging from simple cleanup, to combat against rebellious races." Keuxa explained with a righteous tone. "I'll give you some time to think it over, for now, I promised I'd take you home." The man went back to his kind yet nervous manner as he finished moving the small table and chairs back to their original positions, glancing over to the student as he opened the door. Juan steadily walked out into the open facility again, realizing then that what he thought were just simple people and animals were actually humans, kobolds, drakes, and harpies, all peacefully coexisting. He finally spotted the elevator, which was just a short walk from the infirmary, with three familiar people entering it, team Theta.